It's A Wonderful Case

Chapters

Changeling In The Street
Give Me All Your Dockets
Law Is Fashionable
Let's Investigate Together
The One Witness
Court Hour
It's So Tasty

Changeling In The Street

It was high noon in Canterlot as Prince Blueblood sauntered down the street toward the market district, white-and-blonde fur a near-monochrome contrast to the grey stone of the street. The self-maintaining path felt as natural and solid as it reportedly had when first laid centuries ago, and certainly as long as he could remember. The names and shops might change, but the paths of the city remained a familiar home, so familiar that he sometimes imagined his sense of them was almost as good as an earth pony's. Two blocks down this way, one block that way, and here was the market district, ponies out and about in the usual lunch rush. As he pondered what he was in the mood for, he felt a tremor: something had landed hard a few blocks to the left, perhaps hard enough that the road might need some time to recover. But checking on that was a job for the earth ponies, so he ignored it and instead looked up at the partially cloudy sky.

For Canterlot, "partially cloudy" meant there were any clouds in the sky at all. Living on the side of a mountain so close to the seat of power, the residents claimed to love to bask in the sunlight (and moonlight, both when that had been Celestia's domain and now that Luna was seen as rehabilitated), so the job of the pegasi was to keep the skies clear when they could. But even Canterlot needed occasional rain to wash things out, and some days needed to be cooler than others to match the more extreme seasonal fluctuations in the rest of Equestria, so there were days with clouds in the sky. Blueblood did not think ill of the necessity, preferring instead to find relief in occasional shadow, and he knew the pegasi had more uses for the things. Just then, he thought he saw a yellow pegasus playing around one large cloud, hovering above it then punching through to peek at the ground, but she was too far away to make out details. He tore his gaze away before envy could show.

And he did envy their freedom. Sometimes he wished he could live anywhere but Canterlot, anywhere but in the shadow of his distant blood relative who had long ruled Equestria alone, and only recently began to share power with a very select few. But no, for one like him, Canterlot was the only community he fit in. The unicorn aristocracy accepted him without question, and he in turn was privy to all manner of confessions and secrets that occasionally turned into actual lawsuits. So it was that among the duties he accepted was lawyer, usually prosecutor, having put away some of Equestria's worst criminals over the years. It was one more thing that shackled him to Canterlot, though less literally than the changeling that suddenly hugged his rear right ankle, snapping him out of his drifting thoughts.

Blueblood looked away, then looked back. The changeling stubbornly refused to be a trick of the light. Shiny black chitinous skin, solid sky-blue eyes, fanged mouth, bug-like wings the same color as the eyes...and a piteous expression, body sprawled on the ground as if the changeling had crawled to him, forelegs clinging to his leg like a life preserver. He wondered briefly how one could tell the males from the females, until the changeling spoke in feminine voice.

"Please, help me," she pleaded quietly.

"Please, let go," he deadpanned as he shook his leg to no avail. He could not actually feel any taint creeping up from her, and hoped she was no more filthy than a common pony.

"You've gotta save me!" She clung tighter, causing her body to be limply dragged to and fro as he continued to try to shake her off.

He frowned. "From what?" While his great (many times over) aunt Celestia hoped there were changeling hives out there who might want to peacefully integrate with Equestria, the one everypony had heard of belonged to Queen Chrysalis, which had declared themselves as much of a standing enemy as Equestria had. It helped that they could hide, and their animosity was mainly limited to seeing ponies as a food source. More conventional enemies that steadfastly refused diplomacy tended to end up as flat patches of land, an outcome regretted for the loss of potential friends and allies, with any survivors either converted to the pony way of thinking or willing to continue surviving and let live. All of which meant the notion of him saving a changeling struck him as faintly ridiculous, even if this particular one seemed less "enemy of all Equestria" and more "common gutter trash".

Before she could answer, a small mob of unicorns boiled out of an alley from his left, anger etched on their faces. "There she is! And she's attacking Prince Blueblood!" They warily trotted into a loose circle around him and his passenger, not immediately resorting to physical contact but clearly deploying to prevent the changeling's escape. "Are you alright?"

He snorted, surveying at the mob while not letting the changeling out of his peripheral vision. It was going to be one of those days. "I am inconvenienced. What is going on?"

"That changeling," declared the mob's apparent leader, a pink-and-sky-with-purple-frills unicorn he took a moment to identify as Royal Ribbon, "has been devaluing, degrading, and defacing the stores of the good citizens of Canterlot! As if just being a changeling isn't bad enough!"

"No I haven't," the changeling protested. "I...think?"

Blueblood frowned at his ankle's unwanted passenger. "You think?"

"I don't know! I just woke up a few minutes ago, in the street, hurting all over, then they started yelling and chasing me." She gathered herself into a ball, making a poor impression of a limpet on Blueblood's leg. To Blueblood's dismay, he saw smears of red blood on the street under the changeling, though no visible wounds. A few drops even marred his pristine white fur.

"Hmph. Well." He turned to face the mob. "Far be it from me to defend one of these degenerates, but it seems to me she needs medical attention more than a lynching. If you want her arrested, summon the guards. That is their job."

"She's a changeling," Royal Ribbon snarled. "Pony laws don't apply to her."

Blueblood scowled, just a bit. Changelings were one thing, but misrepresenting Celestia's governance would not do. "This is Equestria," he reminded her. "The same law applies to all who live within our borders under my great aunt's sun. Now, what specific things is she accused of? Tell me and I shall drag her to the guard myself, since she is so determined to have me decide her fate."

"PRINCE BLUEBLOOD! DON'T LET HER GET AWAY!" Two pegasi, a white-and-blue royal guard in golden armor and a yellow-and-fire pegasi he soon recognized as Spitfire, zoomed up the alley the mob had come from. "SHE KILLED RAINBOW DASH!" Barely-constrained rage so inundated Spitfire's voice that the mob flinched and looked ready to break as the pegasi sped closer.

"There, see?" Bluebood quickly sat, pinning the changeling's forelegs even as she let go and weakly tried to push away, repressing his distaste for getting more blood on his fur. "Murder is a proper charge to arrest somepony, or someling, on."

Give Me All Your Dockets

After heading back home to wash off the blood (and any grime or disease the changeling might have had on her) and returning to the market district for a late lunch, it was getting toward sunset by the time Prince Blueblood finally made his way to the courthouse for his afternoon rounds.

It was an imposing building, angular stone with few windows and a set of columns in front reminiscent of some titanic jail cell door, with a set of scales emblazoned up top, supposedly the cutie mark of one of Celestia's first advisors who had authored much of Equestria's first post-Discord legal system under Celestia's authority. Not that Canterlot had many criminals, since those who wished evil and were competent enough to achieve it also tended to know better than to be obvious enough that the law could intervene. This only made Canterlot's law enforcers all the more eager to prove themselves when they did catch a criminal.

Such as the guard pegasus from earlier, who was waiting in the lobby as Blueblood walked in. He had been scratching an itch under his helmet while sitting behind a desk, but at his visitor's approach he let it go, causing the helmet to slide ever so slightly askew, which only got worse when he nodded. "Hey. I was getting worried you weren't coming by."

Bluebood impulsively righted the guard's helmet before seating himself on the opposite side of the desk. "Unlike some ponies, I do not neglect my duties. Today's misadventure was but a delay. Still, I do have other places to be shortly, so let us get on with it. What cases need attention?"

It was Equestrian law that, while parties to a lawsuit could bring their own lawyers, each case before a court would have a prosecutor and a defense, each of whom had passed tests and was certified to practice law in Equestria. Cases without both attorneys would have one, or if necessary both, provided from volunteers, though the amount of compensation they received caused some to question if "volunteer" was the right term. This was how Blueblood earned a majority of his income of late. It was simple truth that to survive in Canterlot one needed a source of income, just like how clear day skies were blue and fire was hot. Besides, taking these cases often sent comforting tingles through his compass rose cutie mark.

The guard spread three large manila envelopes on the table. "Most of today's cases were already claimed. First come first serve, you know the rules. I would've started closing up already, but we've got an attorney coming in from Ponyville so I'm open until she gets here. Anyway, first one." Opening the left envelope, the guard pulled out a mostly blank form with a picture of a scarred and withered old crone of a pony. "Open defense action by old mare Murray."

Scanning the sheet, Blueblood did not hide his puzzled expression. "I don't see a charge. What's she defending against?"

The guard shrugged. "There is none. I'm guessing this is just in case she gets sued. If nopony takes her up on it, the action expires tomorrow at noon."

"Far be it for me to impede justice from following its proper course, even if that course is straight to the garbage bin. I'll pass. Next?"

It took a minute for the guard to stuff the form back in, close the left envelope, and open the more substantial middle one, only pulling the forms a third of the way out, but enough to show pictures of royal guards inspecting a road. "Merchants of Miller Street against the guard investigators. Apparently there was a crime scene which needed the street closed off for a while, and they're suing over lost profits. They've got a prosecutor, just needs a defense."

Blueblood recoiled as if the envelope contained plague in raw, concentrated form. "Why hasn't this been assigned to the guards' council? She's supposed to get first pick of anything involving her."

The guard winced. "Technically she did, but she's out sick today, and sent a note asking if we could hold it for tomorrow. Technically I'm not allowed to 'hold it'..."

"...it's just that she threatens to skin alive anypony who interferes in her cases. Pass, and please advise that lawyer from Ponyville to pass on it too. Next?"

"I was planning to." The guard stuffed the middle envelope again and closed it. Only once it was packed away did Blueblood return his hooves to the table. "You're already involved in this last one, actually. So'm I." Opening the right envelope, the guard pulled out three sheets and a mugshot of the changeling who had looked to him for refuge.

"Ah, yes, the one Spitfire had arrested for murder. Surprised they turned the paperwork around so fast." Blueblood inspected the forms. "Hmm. This is highly irregular. A murder investigation without a body?"

If the guard had winced in sympathy earlier, a different emotion drove him to squeeze both eyes shut now. "They found...pieces...of the victim. They think the changeling ate the rest of the victim's body, or turned it to dust. Or maybe she blew up the victim: the remnants were in a rough circle around a pony-shaped crater in the road, but nopony heard an explosion in that area at that time."

Blueblood spread the papers and double-checked them. "According to this, they only found feathers and blood."

"Too much to be healthy. Spitfire says the changeling killed Rainbow Dash, a junior Wonderbolt under her command, and the lab confirmed the feathers and blood found at the crime scene match Miss Dash's. The changeling wouldn't give a name, so we're calling her Ling for now. Technically there's a kidnapping charge too, but they're only prosecuting for murder. Spitfire says she last saw the victim this morning. They had an argument, so Spitfire suggested they take a break for an hour. That hour passed, then another, so Spitfire was about to go looking for her when Ling showed up. Ling claimed to have taken the victim hostage and offered to lead Spitfire to her. Spitfire figured it was a trap so she tried to ambush Ling, but she says Ling got away and killed the victim. The case got here late in the day, and for some reason nopony who was left wanted to touch it."

Bluebood reached for the quill he knew was holstered on the desk's side. Many unicorns preferred telekinesis, but he was able to hold a quill in hoof well enough to write with. While the result was exhausting if used for long stretches of writing, it did make for a nearly impossible to forge signature, and all he had to do was sign his name on the appropriate line. "That would be because only the hangers-on, who talk about service but don't actually take many cases, remained. None of them would dare defend a changeling, understandably so, but neither will they commit to a case if they don't know who will be defending. Pah!" He shook his head.

The guard rolled his eyes. "If you say so. Not that I don't believe you, but...umm, anyway. Ling was bleeding so they got the doctor after locking her up. Doc couldn't find any wounds, so she guessed it must've been under her chitin. He sprayed Ling with a disinfecting coagulant and said that was all he could do short of surgery. Nasty stuff: I got a whiff of it and some of my feathers fell out."

"Right. Anyway, looks like this is my case now. I'll interrogate the prisoner in the morning." Bluebood was about to sign on the prosecutor's line when his cutie mark flared in pain briefly. He frowned, twisting and pulling his forehoof back a bit to get a look, when suddenly the pain went away. Shrugging, he signed then put the quill away, eyes drifting from his cutie mark to the front door behind him.

"Ooo...kay, yes, I guess it is your case." The guard shuffled the forms back into the envelope. "I mean, I figured it was the only one of the three you'd look at but still..."

Blueblood waved his hoof dismissively as he noted the length of shadows outside and calculated that the sun was now setting, even if he could not directly see it. "Yes, yes. I've signed. Like I said, I'll be here in the morning to interrogate and start my investigation, but for now I have places to be. Good evening."

Law Is Fashionable

Wine glasses tinked, muted conversation burbled, and wait staff glided through the three-hoofed trot that let them carry trays of food through a crowd as party guests – all unicorns tonight, as usual – telekinetically lightened the staff's load with no words, signals, or other communication exchanged. It was an unspoken agreement between aristocracy and staff that the veterans of the latter could effortlessly pull off this gait which everypony else found awkward, and the former did not attempt to learn it. At some events it was one of the few ways in which they could be told apart, as everypony was dressed up. It was something of a social game among the snobbish elite to attempt to trick each other into being seen having long, meaningful conversations with the staff, then snicker and pretend it was some major faux pas to be treating the staff with respect.

Prince Blueblood hated that game. Hated it, even as he had had to get good at it for his own survival. The ponies that lived and worked in the world could be as banal as the ponies that sat back from it and pretended themselves its masters, but at least they were banal in different ways and mixing the two made both more tolerable, a trick he had learned from Celestia.

And so he was attempting to catch the ear of two society mares, who were preparing to tear down the ego of one of their younger peers who had had the audacity to actually ask a staff pony where the restrooms were, when muffled gasps erupted not unlike a flock of pigeons taking flight at once. The two mares were distracted long enough for their prey to escape to powder her nose (Blueblood personally thought she had laid on her makeup too thick, and doing away with all that powder would have made her more beautiful), so he turned his head to the ballroom's double-door main entrance to observe the commotion.

Alicorns, even new ones, tended to be taller than most ponies, and Blueblood knew of exactly one purple alicorn. It was said that chaos often followed in her wake like an obsequious handmaiden, even before she had literally befriended Discord, and Blueblood's own experiences of her shored up the rumor. Unlike other royalty, she was reluctant to assume her position in high society; if rumor was to be believed, she continued to live in a library by choice after her ascension, and had only moved to a castle when forced to relocate by the library's complete and total destruction. Then again, Blueblood mused, perhaps a creature such as her would tire of her constantly chaotic life, and find that an orderly place like a library made a good mental fortress against the neverending onslaught she endured. He had heard of an incident or two when she had spontaneously gone insane, which led to trouble for the entire surrounding town. If that was true, he could almost pity her.

"Councilor Blueblood!"

Almost. But tonight, it seemed, she and her troubles made a beeline for him. The crowd parted to allow her through; even the ruffians in Canterlot knew well that one did not keep a Princess from her duties, and cautionary tales were told of the fates of the few Canterlot citizens to sorely test Celestia's wrath in recorded history. But even as they made way for her, all in the crowd laid eyes on her, and conversation fell quiet enough to hear a pin drop.

"Councilor Blueblood," Twilight Sparkle repeated more softly as she closed the distance. With the crowd out of the way, he saw that she was at least wearing a business suit, dark purple with pink highlights to match her mane and tail. Dress-up was mandatory for this event even for those not on the guest list, though nopony would dare dream of challenging a Princess's attendance here. "Good, I was hoping I'd find you here."

"Princess Twilight Sparkle." Blueblood nodded. "Of course you know my title is Prince."

Synchronized gasps came from the crowd of aristocracy, as well as some wait staff, who would likely be forgiven for acting like the aristocrats given the spectacle.

Twilight blushed. "Except to co-councilors on a case you're on! Umm...that is still an exception even for royalty, isn't it?"

Blueblood thought for a moment. "Hmm...I suppose it could be, though I can not recall any precedent of two members of royalty co-counciling the same case. That would require one to be the prosecutor and the other...oh! Oh, I see. You were the lawyer from Ponyville the guard mentioned, and you came here to work on the case of that changeling?"

Twilight's blush faded like a cinematic transition to black. Blueblood instinctively took a step back from the mask of depression and steel that settled on Twilight's features, then another once he heard the tone of ice in her voice. "Yes. I was worried it might seem like undue influence if only one councilor was royalty, so I thank you for taking the other side. I am here to avenge my friend's murder."

Another round of gasps, and there was suddenly more space around the two as Blueblood was not the only pony to instinctively beat a small retreat.

"I...see. An odd way to do it, but I understand you were close to the deceased, so I shall not judge." Blueblood approached her. "I welcome you to the case, star pupil of Celestia, hero of Equestria, Element of Magic, and Princess of Friendship."

"I wish it were under more pleasant circumsta..." She looked around, as if suddenly aware of all the ponies watching her. "Let's take this somewhere more private." Without waiting for permission or even reaction, she put one hoof on Blueblood's shoulder and teleported them away.

The crowd gasped in unison one last time, though the sound cut off in Blueblood's ears mid-gasp. Which was as well, for he was sure the only result if he or Twilight had confronted them about it would have been another gasp.

Teleportation always unsettled Blueblood. One moment you were here, the next you were there, and the space in between did not have the courtesy to be crossed properly. Between that and his parting thoughts about the party attendees, it took him a few seconds to get his bearings. In contrast, he had heard Twilight was so adept that she danced through multiple teleports, back to back, for practice, so he was not surprised to hear her ask, "Are you okay? Sorry, that was a bit long range."

He focused his eyes but found only darkness. "I'll be fine. Where are we?" Rather than wait for her answer, he lit his horn and took in the details the new light afforded. Angular, stone grey walls framed few windows, while nearby sat a desk with a quill tucked to one side. He blinked and shook his head, but for the second time that day what he saw did not change.

"The courthouse," Twilight offered. "Nopony will be here at this hour, but the evidence file's still where the guard left it. I was hoping we could-"

"That party was on the edge of town! It took me an hour to walk there, and I went straight from here, only stopping to pick up a suit." Blueblood gestured to himself, then checked himself. He was indeed still wearing that silly red and white blazon sweater that was the current fashion.

Twilight pouted. "I'll send you back when we're done."

"Tut tut, Councilor Sparkle." Blueblood closed his eyes, inhaled through his mouth, raised a forehoof to shake it, then exhaled in a near-ceremonial dismissal. "You have, in your indubitable style, abducted me on official business in front of countless witnesses, and thereby provided me an iron clad alibi for missing a painfully boring party." He opened his eyes and smiled. "For that you have my gratitude, and my attention for however long this task of yours shall take. If it shall be at least, oh, let's say ten minutes, plus another hour for me to walk back over there because obviously even you could scarcely do that twice in one evening, why I may as well just go home for what little of the party would remain by the time I returned."

Twilight blinked. "No, I could definitely reverse the spell, right now if you wanted."

"Nine minutes fifty five seconds. But surely you really have business that important to discuss with me." He dramatically put one leg across his forehead. "Alas, I shall just have to miss that speech about the proper place of zebras in pony society, whether they are better or worse than earth ponies. I suppose I must not-cringe as I don't-hear those tired, tired old cliches that lead to disharmony brought back to life. Why, at this rate I might just have to settle for reporting what I have to dear auntie Celestia, who asked me to identify the worst bigots in that crowd that she might arrange for, shall we say, spontaneous educational experiences for them. Fortunately, I have enough experience with their type that I completed that task quickly; unfortunately, it was fast enough that it would seem highly suspicious if I left immediately upon completion, thus I was forced to endure their company until you came along."

With a snicker, Twilight sat next to the desk. "I get the picture. I've got to say, I've had the wrong picture of you ever since Rarity told me about you."

Blueblood smiled back, sitting in the exact same place he had a few hours prior. "Rarity, Rarity...fashion designer, almost too elegant for Ponyville, tried to woo me at the Grand Galloping Gala, Element of Kindness, thinks she wants to be part of Canterlot's upper crust?"

Twilight blinked. "Element of Generosity, but otherwise yes. You remember her?"

A frown briefly graced Blueblood's mouth. "I remember putting on the mask Celestia has me wear more intensely. I'd heard about all of you, of course. I could tell she wouldn't take rejection kindly, so I attempted to dissuade her the only way I knew how. Ah, if you could, please relay my apologies to Applejack for that display: her 'carnival fare' was delicious, even if it was out of place at the event."

"And you couldn't just tell her?"

Blueblood groaned, putting his chin on the desk.

Twilight lit her horn, magic flickering in front of her eyes signalling a diagnostic spell. "Are you alright?"

"You know, I envy you sometimes. Nopony expects you to be anypony but yourself. I was born into a web of social expectations, and I must play to them or lose credibility. Canterlot is a prison for those who would be powerful, to keep them busy, entertained, and out of the way while everypony else makes Equestria move along, and my dear auntie raised me to be Canterlot's warden. My life for Equestria, but I see why she revels in controlled chaos. I may not live as long as her, but if I did I'd need such measures to stay sane."

Twilight tilted her head. "I thought your aunt was Princess Celestia, but she doesn't do anything like that. Chaos just happens around her, sometimes."

Blueblood blinked slowly, looking up at Twilight from the desk.

Twilight looked back. "Okay, it happens a lot."

Blueblood sat back up. "Let's get back to the case. If you're here to avenge Rainbow Dash, it's strange that you're defending the changeling."

"No, you're defending her."

Blueblood gave her a look.

Twilight opened a drawer on the desk, pulled out the folder the case's files had been stored in, and laid the paperwork out on the desk. "There, see?" She pointed to the one form with her hoof.

Blueblood examined it. Sure enough, his signature was right where he had left it: a full inch below the prosecutor's line, and half an inch above the defender's line below it. Twilight's signature was right on the prosecutor's line.

"That...is your signature, right? Not a forgery?"

"Yesss...hmm." Gears turned in Blueblood's mind as he thought through the afternoon. "I think...maybe there is more to this case than meets the eye. Normally we would investigate the case separately, but under the circumstances, I wonder if you might join me."

"Really? I..." She stopped, suspicion and relief battling across her face as the warred across her mind, until relief won. "Thank you, I accept your invitation. It's been a rough week. First my transfuser was stolen, and now this. I still can't believe Rainbow's gone."

"Forgive me for asking, but you seem to be taking her loss well."

Twilight looked into his eyes, steel back in her expression so fast that Blueblood nearly flinched. "I cried on the way over. I'll have nightmares tonight. And I'll mourn once this is all done. But right now I have a job to do, and I will never forgive myself if I do not do the best that I can for her."

"I see. Take tonight to rest; we'll start the investigation in the morning."

"Actually, I kind of already started. Or I tried to. Spitfire saw the murder happen so I figured I'd ask her, but when I stopped by her office..." Twilight looked off to the side, her features softening as her voice quieted.

When Twilight trailed off, Blueblood glanced over the docket. "Councilor Sparkle. Please tell me we are not dealing with a double homicide."

"Oh! No, nothing like that. At least, I really hope not." From her brief grimace, Blueblood could tell that Twilight disliked the possibility as much as he did. "She wasn't there. But I've met her before, so I know she keeps her office neat and tidy. This time it looked like a tornado had been through. Rainbow Dash told me Spitfire had requested her help coming up with a new training regime; that's why Rainbow Dash came up here. So I wasn't surprised to see a bunch of notes in Spitfire's office, but they just looked like they were comparing...well, one of the more intact ones said 'Toughness Vs. Friendship'. I didn't see a training regime at all, but the notes were torn up and scattered all over, so maybe I missed something. What was really odd was that slab of rock in one corner: it looked like the streets around here, but hooked up to the ceiling by a couple chains. It had a few dents in it, and was swinging back and forth."

Blueblood silently thanked Celestia for her visualization exercises, that let him keep up with Twilight's narrative. "Like a punching bag?"

"Yeah, that's exactly what it looked like! But who uses a punching bag made out of street? Anyway, that's all I could find before Soarin told me Spitfire was taking a leave of absence and asked me to leave. I've never seen Soarin without a smile before. I think he was taking Rainbow Dash's death hard."

"Hmm. I know Spitfire and Soarin as well, and you're right, Soarin not smiling is quite troublesome." He chewed over the information for a moment, but when Twilight did not continue her description, he continued, "Let us talk about something else, if you don't mind. Could you tell me about this 'transfuser'?"

Twilight's expression brightened immediately. "Oh! It's something I made to try to give pegasi and earth ponies the ability to cast spells. It...only kinda worked, it kept breaking or getting stuck, but the basic theory seems alright."

Blueblood's eyes widened. "I...forgive me, but I must have misheard. It sounded like you said you made something that can let pegasi and earth ponies cast spells."

"Yes! It was designed to copy a unicorn's or alicorn's magic, and encode it in a form that other ponies could use. So, like, I could imprint it on Shining Armor's magic since he's good with defense and protection spells, hand it to Applejack, and she could shield her whole farm if something attacked."

"My word! That could revolutionize...everything!"

Twilight spread her hooves, rolled her eyes, and scowled. "Yeah, if it worked most of the time. I was showing it to my friends, then Applejack tried an item-copying spell, duplicated an apple...before we knew it, the room was filling with apples, and Applejack was almost crushed on the far side of the room with the transfuser. Good thing I put in a spell so I could shut it off remotely. Once we pulled her and it out of the apples, it took me two hours to reset. I left it on a front table last night, then this morning it was gone. I was hoping to have Rainbow Dash try it next, after she was done helping Spitfire. And now..." She sniffed. "...and now, I-I'll never..."

"Shh." Blueblood leaned over the desk to gently hug Twilight as a minor fit of sobs descended on her. "There, there. Go get some rest. Meet me at the jail half an hour past sunrise, and we'll get started."

Twilight stopped crying, slipped out of the hug, and leaned back, looking slightly ill.

"Is something wrong?"

"No. It's just...that early in the day...ughh." She closed her eyes and sighed. "For Rainbow Dash. I'll do it. See you tomorrow at...eh...just past sunrise." In a flash, she teleported away.

Blueblood shook his head at her odd ways, before cleaning up the case file then letting himself out.

Let's Investigate Together

Next morning came all too early for Blueblood, though out of long habit he rose with the sun. It would just not do for the direct blood relation of Celestia herself to be seen as groggy or tired at the hour when Celestia performed one of her two daily miracles, even if he did need coffee's help. His displeasure was short-lived, and by the time he reached the jail he was properly awake, the trot having gotten his heart pumping and his blood circulating, washing out remnants of the night's weariness.

The jail was a functional back end to the courthouse's ostentatious front, cubical and secure with unique security measures from all three tribes. The building itself was of earth pony manufacture, stone stronger than the mountainside Canterlot rested on, tough enough that if some calamity were to obliterate Canterlot it would be among the last structures standing; some of its guests over the years could have triggered such a calamity, so the real intent was to shield Canterlot as long as possible, buying time for Celestia to throw the jail far away. Bottled lightning and wind dotted the facility, allowing the guards to stun and buffet any would-be escapees from afar; the control center was located near the jail's top, and the cells undeground, so as to make seizing the controls harder than merely reaching the street level entrances and escaping. The softest security measure was the numerous peace spells that dotted the facility, subtly encouraging any within against violence; mind control spells were mostly banned in Equestria, "unconsensual mental domination" being a crime in the same category as rape, and even here where they were seen as possibly necessary, only the gentlest of touches was permitted.

Blueblood believed these spells were why the facility, which he thought should objectively seem stark and depressing with its minimalist decor and plain grey walls, instead felt serene and tranquil. Not that he wanted to get used to being here, although once or twice when he had felt extremely distressed he had resorted to taking refuge in some unused office, letting the magic calm his mind as he worked through his troubles. He had seen his own face in the mirror during one occasion, and the image had emblazoned on his memory such that he recognized the expression before he recognized the guard it was on as he entered. "Oh. Good morning, hello again."

"Hmm?" The guard looked up, snapped out of his reverie. "Oh! Good morning, Prince Blueblood. Yeah, I wanted to see if I was just dreaming last night or if this case really has passed the Twilight Threshold, so I signed up for morning shift here. And if it has, well, I'm on bailiff duty later so I'll get a ringside seat."

Blueblood raised an eyebrow.

"Oh! Right, you wouldn't have heard yet. Uh, Luna heard about the case and said it was important enough that she's going to be judging it personally. She said it's showing up in a lot of nightmares, so for Canterlot's sake she set the trial for this afternoon, so word of the verdict can spread tonight."

Blueblood nodded as he walked inside. "I see. Well, I shall have to conclude my investigation today. What is the 'Twilight Threshold'?"

"Anything that calls for Twilight Sparkle. While cleaning up after the Lord Tirek incident, some of the guards put together that she tends to be called in for the worst troubles. I remember, a few years ago, looking down at Ponyville when I saw a thermomagical rainboom explosion on Sweet Apple Acres. I scrambled a team to check it out and broke out that emergency long range teleport, but it turned out it was a planned demolition. Applejack, one of the farmers, said Rainbow Dash did it, though Twilight talked her through it or something. This was a few hours before the Want It Need It incident; we were waiting for the train back from Ponyville, so Celestia had us help them clean up from that. If that's the same Rainbow Dash this changeling killed, I can see why the Princess would want revenge."

"Hmm." Blueblood looked behind the guard, smiled, and looked back at the guard. "So this 'Twilight Threshold' means that whenever Twilight is called for, prepare for collateral damage?"

The guard nodded. "That's a good way to put it."

Blueblood shrugged. "That's just the nature of being the most destructive of cases. You could hardly blame the Princess for that."

"I suppose so, sir. But still, whenever she's..." The guard trailed off as Blueblood's smile intensified. "She's right behind me, isn't she?" He turned around.

Twilight stood just outside the jail, bleary eyed with her suit slightly unbuttoned and glaring at him with an unreadable expression.

"Um. Good morning, Princess?"

"Guuuh. It's too early in the morning." She yawned, shook herself, and looked a little more awake, fastening the suit's last button in the process. "Alright, let's do-" She took one step forward and froze, wings spreading a bit. "Oh, right, the peace spells." Her horn flashed, then her aura blinked once over her body. "Alright, shield's up, let's go."

Blueblood and the guard blinked in unison.

"Shield? Against the mind control spells? I know they're not a subject everypony studies, but you work here so you've got your own, right?"

Blueblood recovered first, and gestured at the guard. "This...is a pegasus. As you reminded me just last night, pegasi do not normally cast spells. As for myself, I must admit that I have not encountered that field of magic, and I am fairly certain very few unicorns would have reason to be familiar with it."

Twilight waved a hoof. "You're just like Rarity when I tried to teach her illusion magic. 'Unicorns have limits,' she said. 'Nopony else can just pick up new types of spells for fun.' I know my cutie mark gives me a talent for magic, but the same thing happens for history and biology and geology (except for Maud) and everything. Why is it so hard for other ponies?"

"If you could solve that," Blueblood offered, "I do believe you could put much of our educational system out of work overnight. Although perhaps finding something else to do would become easy as well."

Rolling her eyes, Twilight addressed the guard. "Anyway. Is the prisoner ready for interrogation?"

The guard saluted. "Yes, and I'll escort you if you're ready. Report from overnight shift is they had illusion busters ready but she made no effort to hide herself. When she wasn't sleeping she was just depressed. All she would say was she was trying to remember what happened. Oh, and they found more of Rainbow Dash's feathers on her."

Twilight gestured down the hall. "Lead the way. 'On her'?"

The guard began walking, leading the royal pair to a stairwell as plain as the rest of the facility, with thick but currently unlocked doors at either end. "Well, in the cell around her. They suspect the feathers must have been stuck to her, and fell off once she stopped moving for a while. The changeling hasn't left her cell since being arrested; they even brought the doc to her."

Blueblood and Twilight both stepped into the door at once, almost walking into each other. Twilight stepped back, as Blueblood was sure she would, so he walked forward, winding up second in their single file formation. "A sound precaution. Ever since that dreadful changeling queen attacked, relations with the changelings have been sour. Though they appear to have gone to ground again."

"If this changeling is guilty of murder," Twilight growled as she entered the staircase, "I will rip out her soul and dissect it, until I find out where she came from. Then I will hunt down the queen that birthed her, and give her one chance to prove this changeling wasn't acting on her direct orders. If she was..." Her horn and eyes glowed ominously as she spoke in echoing whispers, "I. Will. Let. Go."

For just a moment, Blueblood thought he saw the shadows themselves fleeing in terror. He was fairly certain he did not imagine that newborn's wail, though there were no children in earshot. Despite being deep within a stone building, the scent of a meadow in floral bloom tickled his nose until Twilight's glow shut off. After spending a few seconds trying to describe the patterns he felt on his fur, he decided against it, but focusing on that let him confine his tongue's report to quickly forgotten short term memory.

The guard almost faltered as he exited the bottom of the stairs "W-wasn't soul extraction found barbarous and outlawed as a method of execution?"

"It was." Blueblood looked around the jail cells. He had rarely actually come down here, and so was surprised that the stone here was dark blue, perhaps reinforced from the original construction. The facility had originally been designed with just ten cells, with plans to add more as needed. It was a testament to Celestia's rule that, for all the population expansion since then, only one major excavation of new cells had been needed. Even on its rowdiest night ever (the last time Canterlot had hosted the Triple Tribe Cup, which was also the year that sports league was retired in favor of the modern Equestrian Games) Canterlot's jail had not needed more than a hundred cells. Apparently last night had been peaceful, or perhaps the local criminals also believed in the Twilight Threshold and decided to take a break, because right now only one was occupied.

Ling either had not heard them enter or was ignoring them, looking at her reflection in a polished section of wall that served as a mirror. Not that there was much else to do: the furnishings consisted of a soft slab bolted to the wall that acted as a bunk, and a privyhole in the corner in place of a toilet that could be smashed into shivs.

Blueblood made no pretense of being able to tell one changeling from another, not that he had personally encountered any before. Still, something about how the suspected murderer carried herself looked familiar, even if witness and circumstantial evidence did not already rule out any possibility that the one before him was not the same entity he had encountered yesterday. He looked around the cell. "Hmm, I don't see any blood."

Twilight approached the cell, taking in the spartan cell in a way that made Blueblood wonder if she had ever seen a jail before. Her voice was much calmer than it had been on the stairs. "Oh! Trying to identify her tribe? Good thinking, but you can see a changeling's blood color in their wings. See the blue? At least we know she doesn't belong to Chrysalis's hive: they're turquoise. And unlike how pony blood turns red, changeling blood keeps its color when exposed to air."

Twilight's voice apparently got Ling's attention, because she suddenly looked at the door and locked eyes with Twilight.

Blueblood glanced from one to the other to confirm their lines of sight. "Do you know her?"

Twilight shook her head. "No, we've never-"

"Twilight!" Ling leaped at the iron grid door and pressed her face and forehooves into it. "You've gotta get me out of here!"

Twilight went very still.

The guard stepped in front of Twilight, breaking line of sight. "How do you know the Princess?"

"Duh! Because she's Twilight! She..." Ling squeezed her eyes shut and rubbed the back of her head. "...o-oww."

The guard sighed. "Sorry, she gets like that when she tries to remember anything past yesterday. She swears she has no memory of encountering Rainbow Dash, and no explanation for why she had the deceased's feathers on her."

Twilight finally snapped out of her surprise, stepped around the guard, and growled, "I don't know who you are, but know this: I am here to avenge my friend. If you are found guilty, I plan to ask the court if I may personally execute you. I am the last pony you can expect mercy from."

Ling's eagerness died in an instant. Like a slow motion parody of a doll with its strings cut, she slowly collapsed in a heap, eyes staring at nothing.

Twilight watched the collapse while breathing through clenched teeth. "Excuse me." She turned around and ran back upstairs.

"Huh." The guard scratched his head. "She hasn't reacted like that to anypony else."

"Indeed." Blueblood stuck a hoof through the door, enough to prod the changeling between her ears. "Hey."

"Ow." Ling shrank from his touch and turned her head away from him. "Go 'way."

"That hurt? But I just barely touched you."

Ling slumped, not getting up but writhing snake-like, further back into the cell, making a noise like scraping metal over stone. "Yeah, I've got a few bruises. If you're wondering why you aren't seeing them, blame this changeling skin of mine. Even I can't see them."

"Hmm, interesting. Now-"

Still not looking at him, she waved a hoof. "I don't remember doing anything bad to those ponies who say I messed up their shops, I can't remember this Rainbow Dash, I don't know where her body is, maybe I got drunk by draining her to dust, if you're going to kill me for killing her just bucking do it already!"

Blueblood frowned. "Now see here, I am here to help you! I will thank you to refrain from...err...I was unaware that changelings used common pony idioms like, well, that b-word."

"Seriously?" That got her to turn over and face him. "We've got legs, we can do what you do. Is that all your questions, or do you want me to burp up more of her feathers? Something's sure turning my stomach. Maybe there's still a bit of her wriggling in there. Want to crawl in and have a look?" She opened her mouth wide.

Blueblood looked at the guard, who gave a weak smile. "Last evening's shift tried to interrogate her. Apparently they got a little zealous."

"Hmph. I fear they have closed down this line of questioning for us." Blueblood headed for the stairs. "Good day, miss. I do apologize for the unpleasantness you have been through so far."

Silence hung in the air until he reached the stairwell, when Ling spoke up. "So...you're not freaked out?"

"Why would I be?" Blueblood stopped, one hoof on the bottom stair, looking back.

"At, well, this." Ling gestured to herself. "Everypony else is scared, 'Ooh run run the evil changeling is here,' or thinks I killed Rainbow Dash."

Blueblood did not allow himself a smile. Sometimes threatening to abruptly cut off conversation could spur new thoughts that had been reluctant to come forth, and it appeared that tactic had been successful once again. "Did you kill her?"

"I don't knooow." Ling frowned, looking at the floor. "But I don't think...I, well, I don't think I'd want to."

Blueblood slowly removed his hoof from the stair and turned to face her fully. "Please, explain."

Ling looked at him. "I think maybe she was a friend or something, but I can't see her face. But I heard her, like, in my head. I think I had telepathy with her. Like she was my best friend, somepony I'd never want to kill."

"Do you know what happened to her?"

"Nooo..." Ling massaged her skull. "Whenever I try, all I can remember is getting hit, real hard, then I was on the ground with the wind knocked out of me and hurting real bad all over and ow-how-howww..." She sniffled, eyes shut tight in pain.

"Alright, back up, before that. You say that you were telepathic with her?"

Ling's expression of pain faded. "I...think so? She thought it'd be funny for me to walk around, not even doing anything but just being there, and watch all the fancy unicorns freak out. It's not like we walked in together. Just me, on my own, but I could hear her laughing in my head."

Blueblood nodded. "I see. Anything else?"

Ling shook her head. "No. I'm sorry...wait, no, there is something." She looked at the mirror-stone again. "I think...before I hurt...err, before whatever it was that hit me, I...she...one of us was hurting even worse." Ling tapped her heart. "In here. It hurt so bad, neither of us could think straight."

"Can you tell which one of you was hurting?"

"There was just so much pain, a-and regret...I can't sort out what's hers and what's mine. I can't hear her now, though." She looked at Blueblood. "I know she was my friend, I just know it. But I can't remember her saying my name. I...I think she's in trouble, somewhere. I know you won't let me out to look for her, but please...can you find her? Save her?"

"You think she's alive?"

"I don't knooow," Ling sighed, eyes downcast. "If she is then why can't I hear her any more?"

After waiting a count of ten to make sure no further thoughts were about to emerge, Blueblood turned back to the stairwell. "Well. What you have provided may help. Good day."

Upon reaching the ground floor, Blueblood saw Twilight standing with minor tremors, taking meditative deep breaths that gradually grew steadier. She looked at him as he approached. "Something about that changeling..." Twilight shook her head. "Accusing her felt like kicking a puppy. When I got my license I thought it was just another contingency, another way to be prepared. I never thought I'd be using it to argue for execution, let alone..." Another deep breath, then Twilight looked at Blueblood. "Does it ever get easier?"

Blueblood nodded. "With time. Fortunately for you, you do not have to do anything more right now. Incomplete though it is, the physical evidence so far says she did kill your friend. I have but hours to prove otherwise. If you do nothing, and I do not find counterproof in time, the case will be closed. That being the case, would it soothe you to assist me further, that you might be satisfied that we have all the facts before we set hoof in court?"

"It would." Twilight breathed out, relaxing as if exhaling her tension. "Let's waste no time." Thus readied for action, she sat down.

Blueblood waited to see what complex miracle of magic Twilight was undoubtedly conjuring. His patience was rewarded when a blank scroll and a quill popped into existence, and Twilight began writing.

"Step 1: get materials to make a checklist. Check! Step 2: make a checklist for the investigation. Check! Step 3: ...hmm. Blueblood, what do you usually do for step 3?"

The One Witness

It was easy to forget at times, but Canterlot was a city into itself. Streets upon streets, stores opening and closing frequently enough that one might never be aware of a specific establishment during its entire existence despite living only two or three street crossings away, and certainly more residents than even Celestia herself could personally be familiar with. Canterlot was not the biggest city in all Equestria, but it was more than big enough to call itself a city.

If one lived long enough in a such a place, eventually one had moments that drove home the sheer scale of it all. Blueblood now experienced such a moment. Or indigestion, mixed with the cloying aftertaste of that place Twilight had dragged him to when he had suggested a break for lunch. It catered to a younger crowd, and while Blueblood did not doubt Twilight had many prized memories there, they would have been from her residence of years prior before she grew into the adult, let alone the alicorn, she was now.

But Blueblood suspected this moment was the city's. Answers, even so much as a single witness, simply refused to turn up after hours of searching. It took more than lunch to pull that off, even with a milkshake. At least she had agreed to sit at a bench outside the restaurant, where the stench of quickly prepared cheap food was much less, though Blueblood could still detect a hint of the vegetable oils they cooked the hayburgers in.

Twilight was going over her checklist, now a scroll easily three times her length, two bites remaining of her hayburger on a small white paper plate in front of her. Blueblood could not find a solid objection to recording fine minutiae of a case, although Twilight's method seemed to incur a lot of duplication and steps more fine grained than he would ordinarily take note of. As she began her third runthrough, Blueblood interrupted, "I must say, you seem to have calmed down from this morning."

It was three seconds before Twilight put her scroll down and looked at him. "What do you mean?"

"I mean, you seem more focused on the case, instead of being distracted from your unpleasant encounter."

"Believe me, I still want to figure out how she got under my skin like that."

"Hmm, yes, well if you are calmer now I can safely tell you what she told me after you left, and my theory. That transducer of yours, could it tune to changeling magic? Say, telepathy?"

"Telepa-" Twilight blinked. "Yes. Yes it could! Oh, you think it's tuned to Ling?"

"She told me she was telepathic with Rainbow Dash, though she can not hear Miss Dash now. You are more familiar with changelings than I, but aren't they known for hive minds?"

Twilight's eyes widened. "Yes! Not all changelings, some of them don't have it, but some live in mental communion with their families all their lives, being cut off is a fate worse than death. It cripples them. Are you suggesting Ling stole my transducer?"

Blueblood shook his head. "No, from what I have heard I rather suspect Rainbow Dash may have made off with it. She knew where it was and how to operate it, yes?"

Twilight sighed. "Yeah. And she would, if she had a good reason."

"You said a cut off changeling is crippled? Perhaps she found such a changeling and used it in an act of mercy, forming a one pony, one changeling hive. That would logically have put her in proximity to Rainbow Dash, perhaps close enough to acquire some of her feathers...and maybe blood, if there was some sort of blood sisters ritual."

"Hmm." Twilight levitated her hayburger, took a bite, and chewed thoughtfully, swallowing before speaking. "It's a bit of a stretch. There was too much blood for that. But it's one theory." She glanced over her scroll. "How does that figure in to the sightings of Ling? We've talked to all the merchants, and they say she did something that negatively affected their stores but I can't figure out what."

"Tsk." Blueblood sighed. "You really have been away from Canterlot for a while. What Ling did that was so objectionable, Councilor Sparkle, was simply to walk in the front door as a changeling."

Twilight gave Blueblood a flat look.

"It's true! Changelings are, shall we say, not of the social elite just now. They may tolerate pegasi and earth ponies because those who won't tend not to remain successful merchants, but give them an excuse to hate someone and they will. They make a hue and cry of being nervous when a changeling is around, but that is entirely upon them. Still, mercantile activity requires both customer and merchant, and nervous customers are less likely to buy nonessential goods. It is entirely on that theory that they claim damage."

Twilight facehoofed. "Or as Rainbow Dash would put it, they freaked out just because the changeling was hanging around. That is exactly the kind of prank she would pull if she had a chance. A rogue changeling would be all the chance she'd need."

"Indeed, and that corroborates with how Ling put it. So that is part of the mystery solved. Now if only we could figure out what happened to Rainbow Dash herself. Ling was of less assistance there, I am afraid."

"That's...worrying. If Rainbow Dash was in a hive mind with Ling, and Ling can't speak to her now, then..." Twilight absently finished off her hayburger. "We needsh a witnesh." She gulped.

Without delay, Blueblood levitated the detritus of their lunch into a nearby trash bin and began walking away from the restaurant. His nostrils soon ceased smelling the oil, which was all the gratitude he sought from them. "Spitfire reported the murder. Let us check in on her."

Twilight glanced over her list one more time before packing it away, hiding it under her mane. "That's on my list after inspecting the crime scene. You'd think a crater would be easy to find."

Blueblood chuckled. "Alas, Councilor Sparkle, there is no more crime scene. The inspectors were quite thorough about collecting the blood and feathers, and the crater will have restored itself by now to a smooth and even surface. Countless ponies have doubtless already trod right through it, not suspecting a thing."

Twilight facehoofed. "That's right. Sorry, I've gotten so used to Ponyville's dirt paths. So I guess we move on to Spitfire, but she's on leave and I don't have her home address."

"Actually I have a theory about that. Do you know how close she was to the deceased?"

Twilight looked at the sky, thinking. "Spitfire's stuck her neck out for Rainbow Dash at least once that I know of, and they met when Rainbow Dash saved Spitfire's life. I'd say that was a good first impression."

Blueblood abruptly turned left. "Then I believe I know her whereabouts."

"You do?" Twilight followed without missing a step.

"I do, and I rather suspect it is a deduction that you would make too if you had the same information. Ahem. Spitfire is a professional, working class pony. The Wonderbolts are not that many, so they are all something akin to family to her, except for those dishonorably discharged. If you were to lose a sister or a brother, where would you go?"

Silence.

Blueblood looked back. "Twilight?"

Twilight was frozen, eyes unseeing, but recovered before Blueblood could double back. She trotted quickly to catch up. "Sorry. It's just...I almost did lose Shining Armor once, to the changelings as it turned out."

Blueblood winced. "Oh. Right, sorry for forgetting. I did not mean to stir such memories. I do not recall reports of you at the bar during the incident, though."

Twilight blinked. "Why would I go to the bar?"

"Ah, Twilight, you are a true joy. Unlike you and I, many ponies turn to, shall we say, chemical support in times of emotional crisis."

"Chemical sup-" Twilight looked up as Blueblood led her toward the door of a bar. "Oh. 'What would Applejack do,'" she deadpanned.

"Indeed. And there is exactly one such place in the immediate vicinity of Wonderbolts Headquarters." He walked in and looked around.

From how Twilight began to study the place, Blueblood knew she had seen bars before, but not many. Although undoubtedly she preferred to spend her leisure time clear-headed in academic pursuits, her friends would have made quite certain she knew what it was like to get drunk. This was the sort of establishment Rarity might have dragged her to: black and white oblong diamond floor tiles, various shades of grey and white up the walls and ceiling, tables everywhere and no booths. The only color was the red velvet lined stools and seats, faded pictures of celebrities who had visited the place over the years on the walls, the collection of bottles behind the main bar counter, and of course the ponies themselves. Given the afternoon hour, verified by a marble-and-onyx analog clock set above the bar, it did not surprise Blueblood that, other than the black-and-white bartender in his red vest and snooty little moustache, only a single pony sat at the bar.

He considered Spitfire an acquaintance, if not a friend. "Controlled", "in charge", "no nonsense", and "always alert" were among the terms he would use to describe her. That was not the pegasus his eyes now beheld. Spitfire sat on a stool, her upper half sprawled over the bar counter, five empty mugs next to her. Her mane, tail, and blue jacket were disheveled, with dried tear streaks under her eyes. Shades sat on the bar next to her nose, apparently where they had fallen off. Currently she was struggling to lift a hoof to gesture in the general direction of the bartender. "I'll hic tell yoush hic whensh I've had hic 'nough," came slurred words from her mouth, but the barkeep was ignoring her.

"It seems my suspicions were correct," Blueblood muttered. He walked up to the bar, Twilight following, and gently stamped on it with a hoof. "Bartender!"

The barkeep turned around, jumping slightly in surprise. He was a burly earth pony, white with black mane, hooves moving a rag along a mug as if not just drying but polishing it. Lines of worry etched the stallion's face, but a few of them vanished as he saw Blueblood. "Oh thank Celestia! Tell me you're here for Spitfire!"

"In a manner of speaking. One Tongue Stiffener for our friend here."

The bartender reached below the bar and rummaged. "Coming right up. Don't tell her, she's one of my best customers, but I always make sure I have one ready when any Wonderbolt starts binging." He pulled up a sealed shot glass with a red, bubbling concoction. The moment he tore the lid off it, it began fuming and Twilight's eyes began watering.

Out of more practice than he cared to admit, Blueblood quickly snatched it up and carried it under his chin, then quickly moved to Spitfire's side so the wind of his passage would keep the fumes from his nose, then stuck it under Spitfire's nostrils. The moment she opened her mouth to protest, he chucked the concoction into her mouth.

Out of what Blueblood assumed was more practice than she cared to admit, Twilight ducked under the bar.

Spitfire stopped gesturing, and began focusing cross-eyed on her leg.

Blueblood mentally counted to five before Twilight began getting out from under the bar. "She's not going to go off?"

Blueblood looked back at Twilight with a smile. "I do not know what recipes you are familiar with, perhaps ones more tuned for emergency restoration of full physical capabilities, but here in Canterlot we employ sophisticated remedies. Once this conversation is done, she will be severely fatigued, such that she will barely be able to walk home with an escort..." He looked at the bartender, who nodded. "...to sleep it off. She will not, as you say, 'go off'."

Spitfire blinked, eyes still a bit unfocused. "Whu's goin' on? Where'm I?"

Blueblood leaned into her field of view. "You're safe, Spitfire. We just need you to answer a few questions."

"Oh! Bluey!" She slowly turned her head to look at him. "There's...there's been some trouble. I think...Twily!" Spitfire smiled, leaned sideways, fell out of her seat, flapped her wings to catch her fall, hovered over to Twilight, and wrapped the alicorn up in a hug with unsteady legs. "It's...it's awful." She buried her eyes in Twilight's mane. "Rainbow Dash...I, I think she's hurt."

Twilight hugged Spitfire back. "We're here to take care of it. But we need to know what happened. Can you tell us what you saw?"

"It, it was that changeling." Spitfire sniffed. "I'm sure of it."

Blueblood pulled out a pouch and set it on the bar, eliciting a quick series of clinks from the many coins within. "Take her tab out of that. Miss Spitfire, please, tell us what makes you so positive it was her."

"'Cause she said so. She said she was gonna snack on Rainbow Dash if I didn't race her."

Gears clicked in Blueblood's mind. "Come again? Or, better yet, from the beginning. When was the first time you saw this changeling?"

"Y, yesterday." Spitfire tried to stand up, but her legs wobbled. With Twilight's assistance, she slid into leaning on a bar stool. "It was yesterday. I know how to be hard and mean to train ponies, but sometimes that just doesn't work, you know? I've been trained to be a fighter, and a stunt flier, but I've been guessing my way through commanding. Don't tell her I said this, but this one time we were trying to teach some colts and fillies, I really didn't know what to do. It scared me, but Rainbow Dash saved me once again. So I figured, why not learn from her? I wanted to just ask her to show me how to do better, but all I could get out was asking her help setting up training."

Twilight peered at the bartender. "This Tongue Stiffener isn't a truth potion, is it?"

"Not at all," he reassured her as he collected Spitfire's mugs. "That would be the alcohol. A Tongue Stiffener just makes her able to speak clearly."

"I guess we're both stubborn," Spitfire continued. "Eventually we just blew up at each other, so I suggested we take an hour to cool down. One hour turned into two, and Soarin mentioned a changeling had been spotted in town, but I was waiting for Rainbow Dash to get back. I was taking out my frustration on my punching slate so I could think of how to apologize to her while chewing her out for being late, when the changeling just shows up at my door, says she's taken Rainbow Dash prisoner, says she'll let her go if I race her. She was being all snide and snarky about it."

Blueblood borrowed Twilight's scroll and quill and began taking notes at the bottom of the checklist, earning him a dirty look from Twilight. Upon noticing Spitfire had stopped talking, Blueblood urged, "Go on."

"No one." Blueblood looked up. "Threatens." He recognized on Spitfire's face, the same look of determination Twilight had shown him earlier. "MY. Wonderbolts." Spitfire took in a breath; when she exhaled, it reeked of booze, but she was now steady enough to sit up properly. "I lunged at her, trying to catch her then and there, but she was fast. Really fast. Like, could have given Rainbow Dash a run for her money fast. So she got her race, me chasing her down the hall, outside, around town...and I could tell she was slowing down now and again, leading me on. I couldn't keep up with her all day, so when she went above one large cloud, I sneaked below it, and tracked her by her shadow. I got behind her, popped up, and..." She rubbed her forehooves against each other. "I don't think I've hit anything that hard, ever. And then I...I..." Abruptly, her confidence and surety left. She sank to the floor, face in her hooves. "I messed up. I'm..." She sniffed. "I'm so sorry, Rainbow Dash, I messed up and got you killed."

Twilight hugged Spitfire, gently running a hoof through Spitfire's mane. "Shh, there there, just tell us what happened."

"I'm a failure. I followed my training, and, a-and..." Spitfire gulped.

"No one's blaming you." Blueblood busied himself writing notes, but slowly, tentatively reached over to Spitfire, laying a reassuring hoof on her shoulder. "Just tell us what you did."

"I hesitated. I was mad, really mad, and when you're mad you make mistakes. My training was to stop, catch my breath, calm down when that happens. I...no one's ever made me so angry as that changeling did just then, threatening somepony under my command. So I hesitated. If I hadn't...b-by the time I dropped through the cloud, the changeling was getting away, and there were...oh Celestia, there were PIECES of Rainbow Dash all over. I'd know those feathers anywhere."

Blueblood raised an eyebrow. "Yes, that was in the crime report. Some of the local merchants, attracted by the noise, came out and chased the changeling until I caught her. Meanwhile, you fetched a guard. Is that right?"

Spitfire nodded. "I wanted to chase her down myself, but I knew if I did I might just kill her on the spot. I never thanked you for catching her. If you hadn't..."

Blueblood waved a hoof. "No need to thank me. One more question, please, about that 'punching slate' of yours. Is it a section taken from the roads around here?"

"Yeah? I mean, I'm no earth pony, but I could go hoof to hoof with one in a fight if I had to. The self-repair spells mean I don't have to keep buying new punching bags, so it's more than paid for itself."

"I see. Miss Spitfire, please do not doubt your training. Indeed, unless I miss my guess, you should trust in it even more."

Spitfire blinked. "But, but I..."

"Ssh. Rest for now. Councilor Sparkle or I shall follow up, but we are due in court..." Blueblood glanced at the wall clock. "...oh dear. Councilor Sparkle, I do not suppose I could prevail upon you for a teleport to the courthouse? We are almost late, and the defendant is likely already in the courtroom."

Twilight slowly disentangled herself from Spitfire. "But we're still investigating."

"Court schedules wait for nopony. I am afraid the final step shall have to occur during the trial, but I believe I have an unassailable defense that should satisfy even your need for justice."

"If you're sure." Twilight put a hoof on his shoulder. "I'm looking forward to seeing what kind of defen-"

One flash later, the bar fell silent.

Court Hour

Of all the rooms in all of Canterlot, Prince Blueblood was almost more familiar with the courtroom than with those of his own estate. Done up in wood decor that had been remodeled twice that he had seen, it was exactly symmetrical yet the sides were so different. In the center along the back wall was a raised podium behind which the judge sat; a cubicle to the judge's right contained a station for the court reporter, while to the judge's left was one for witnesses. Two medium-length tables in the middle faced each other and the judge, one table for the prosecutor, one for the defense. A raised box of seats behind the prosecutor held the bailiffs' station, with gear to quell a small riot, which Blueblood had seen used exactly once (resulting in the first remodel). An identical one behind the defense held a jury, in those cases which required one. Opposite the judge was a gallery where members of the public could watch the trial.

Today there was no jury, and the only bailiff was the royal guard who had been following the case. The gallery was packed with merchants, Royal Ribbon in the first row, most of them glaring at Ling. Ling was not looking at them, instead just quietly looking at the defense table as if it might have answers. Blueblood sat to her left, shielding her from some of the gallery's glares, while Twilight settled in behind the prosecutor's table.

Without formality, Luna stepped in from the back of the room and proceeded to the podium, telekinetically rapping the gavel there once as she approached. "Court is now in session. Be advised, we will call a recess if..." She stifled a yawn. "...we are not finished before it is time for us to raise the moon." Her gaze swept the courtroom. "Twilight. I had not expected to see you in such a position."

"I am here to honor my friend," Twilight replied, no emotion in her voice.

"We hast done so on the field of battle, long ago. While the means may change, we assure thee, we understand thy sentiment. Now, the charge is murder. How does the defendant plead?"

"Guilmmmph," Ling tried to reply before Blueblood stuffed a hoof in her mouth.

"Before that, if it please the court we wish to address a lesser matter: a theft, which should illuminate details of the murder charge." Blueblood tried not to sweat, tried to seem more confident than he felt.

"OBJECTION!"

Blueblood looked at Twilight, but the outburst had come from Royal Ribbon behind her.

"We are here," the merchant continued, "to see that changeling pay for her crimes!"

"You mean the transducer?" Twilight guessed. "Do you know what happened to it?"

"Seeing as neither councilor has a problem with this digression, objection overruled. Defense may proceed." Luna banged her gavel while staring daggers at Royal Ribbon.

"Thank you, your highness, this won't take long." Blueblood smiled. "Councilor Twilight, do I understand it correctly that you are capable of illusion magic?"

Twilight nodded. "I'm not as good as a changeling, but I could pretend to be somepony else if I wanted to."

"And thus, this transducer of yours. Perhaps we should keep the full capabilities out of the court record, but is it fair to say that, if were attuned to you, its user would also be capable of producing disguises?"

Twilight nodded. "But it's attuned to Ling...oh, wait! Changelings have illusion magic too."

"Not...exactly. While they are certainly capable, I believe it is still attuned to you. I also have reason to believe it is in this courtroom. You said that you could disable it remotely. Could you shut it off?"

Twilight blinked. "It's here? Alright..." Her horn glowed briefly.

With no sign of pain or sensation, Ling suddenly twisted, inverted colors, faded, brightened, and reformed into a cyan pegasus with unkempt rainbow-hued mane and tail, bruises on her head and sides and scars from cuts that had clotted without much care. On a chain around her neck was a metal and crystal gadget that sputtered, glowed unevenly, sparked tiny lightning bolts along its surface for a few moments, then stopped completely.

Twilight froze, mouth wide open.

Blueblood grinned. "Your highness, defense motions for dismissing the murder charge, on the grounds that the alleged victim is not deceased."

Luna blinked. Blueblood was uncertain if she had seen far wilder, or was just too tired to react at this hour. "Does prosecution have any objection?"

Twilight leaped over the tables, tackled her friend, hugged tight, and commenced shedding tears of joy. "Rainbow Dash Rainbow Dash Rainbow Da-ha-haaash!"

"We take that as a no. Motion granted. Case dismissed; we are going back to bed." Luna rapped her gavel and walked out.

The merchants in the galley grumbled, until the bailiff toggled on a rose-aura shield at the front of the galley, entirely cutting off the galley from the rest of the room. Although the merchants would have been able to overpower the shield with concentrated effort, they took the hint and filed out the rear exit, giving Rainbow Dash withering glares as they left.

Rainbow Dash weakly struggled in Twilight's embrace. "Oww! Weren't the charges dropped? Why are you trying to crush me to death?"

Twilight loosened up her grip and looked her friend in the eyes. "Rainbow Dash, it's over! Stop pretending! You're not a changeling! You're not dead!"

Rainbow Dash blinked, expression completely blank.

"I believe," Blueblood sighed, "it is not an act. Miss Dash, if I might hazard a guess, are you currently rather confused?"

"Well...yeah?" Rainbow Dash looked around the courtroom. "Wait wait, are you saying I'm Rainbow Dash?"

Twilight gasped, eyes growing wide. "You don't remember?"

"Councilor Sparkle...ah, I suppose it's Princess Sparkle again, now that the case is over. Canterlot General Hospital offers anti-amnesia therapy, if you could kindly telep-"

FLASH

"-ort us, yes, well." Blueblood took a moment to verify that they were in the hospital's lobby: a utilitarian affair, with seats along the walls, a window to one side that served as the main check-in, and patients and nurses scattered around all looking at the trio. "Ah, next time aim for the street outside please. It wouldn't do to teleport right into the path of a patient, now would it?"

"Aheh, sorry."

Rainbow Dash squirmed free of Twilight and scooted away from her. "What the buck's going on?!? Why'd you bring me here?"

"Easy, easy." Blueblood pointed to the nurse's desk. "Ah, Princess Sparkle, could you start on the paperwork to get your friend some care? Meanwhile I shall, as she has quite reasonably requested, explain things."

Twilight looked visibly torn. "I, w-well...Rainbow Dash, I don't want to leave you...promise me you won't run off?"

Rainbow Dash backed away a step further, tripped against a seat, and found herself with her back to the wall. "You're the one who was just trying to kill me. Tell you what, if he'll fill me in I'll wait around long enough to hear it."

"Princess Sparkle," Blueblood droned in what he hoped was a soothing voice, "I know you are beholden to logic so please consider this: there is a certain amount of paperwork that needs to be done before Rainbow Dash will be admitted, and I would hazard a guess that your superior organizational skills will lead you to complete it considerably faster than I could, perhaps in as little as half the time as I would need."

Twilight only needed a moment to consider. "You're right." She teleported to the nurse's desk.

"Or at least," Blueblood sniffed once Twilight was out of immediate earshot, "she'll find paperwork half as dreadful as I would."

Rainbow Dash chuckled. "You're not half bad. Alright, so...how'd I get here? Why can't I remember? Why do I hurt so much?"

Blueblood smirked. "I am afraid you have suffered an entirely too well-deserved blow, from a mare who punches rock for practice."

"Whoa. Who'd I piss off?"

"A great many ponies, but one in particular that you did not mean to. What I surmise happened, is that you stole this gadget..." Blueblood lifted Rainbow Dash's amulet telekinetically. "...which enabled you to duplicate Twilight's magic, after a fashion. You then came here to assist your commanding officer Spitfire, as you possessed a point of wisdom she desired. Perhaps you anticipated that this would lead to unpleasantness, and so 'borrowed' your friend's device in preparation. To blow off steam after your attempted assistance turned into an argument, you used the device to disguise yourself as a changeling and waltz into some of Canterlot's haughtier shops, playing no actual malice but giving them a good scare. Although, I do not think you anticipated how serious your argument with Spitfire turned out to be."

Rainbow Dash sighed. "I think...I remember that. I don't even remember what it was about, I just remember feeling really bad afterward."

"From what I can gather, it was about her style of training. She takes pride in being the commander of the Wonderbolts, but her skill set is incomplete. You know how to be gentle where she does not, and she wished to learn. But it was an awkward meeting, as both of you are prideful and stubborn." Blueblood poked Rainbow Dash. "I could tell from our interview this morning. In the future, you would do well to be less arrogant to somepony who is trying to help you."

"Eheh." The pegasus blushed. "You know, I was surprised when you kept trying to help."

"Yes, well. Too much stubbornness can be a problem, but I find a little bit is a virtue. Anyway, while a clash of egos like yours had a foreordained result, you still considered Spitfire a friend. The argument left you feeling so bad that you were desperate for any quick fix to the problem, rather than going back and talking it out."

The pegasus looked at Blueblood, hopeful. "Did I find one?"

"No, and of this I can be certain because there was not one to be found. But you tried. Seeking to make up and get past it, you donned your disguise, pretended you were a changeling who had captured Rainbow Dash, and goaded Spitfire into 'rescuing' you. Perhaps you thought that would give you an excuse to talk again without needing to apologize. But rather than leading her on until you could drop the disguise and pretend to be rescued as you planned, she got the drop on you, punching you into the street from some distance above it, which is when you acquired the majority of your present injuries including your amnesia. Her view was obscured by a cloud, so she did not see that the blood and feathers came from your body; she only gained sight of the impact zone after you had had a chance to crawl away from it. In her fury, she leaped to the conclusion that the changeling had slain you in displeasure for being hit. I believe you recall events from there."

"Is that when I was hurting so much, then those merchants found me and chased me to you?"

Blueblood nodded. "Quite. There were no other witnesses. Everypony else just took the word of the commanding officer of the Wonderbolts. Even when you molted in jail, a result of the disinfectant spray, everypony there rationalized reasons why your feathers were suddenly around, yourself included. Unbeknownst to you, the device was stuck casting the disguise spell, so when you saw a changeling in the mirror, you assumed you must be a changeling, and perhaps you were afraid you had killed her since everypony was saying you did. You, and I admit Princess Sparkle and I, ascribed your hearing Rainbow Dash's voice in your head to magic, but of course it takes no magic to talk to yourself."

Fetching a hoof mirror off a nearby table, Rainbow Dash looked at her reflection. "Huh. So is this what I really look like? More awesome than a changeling." She gently rolled the mirror back and forth and moved it around, checking herself from multiple angles.

"I see your personality was not much altered. I believe Princess Sparkle subconsciously recognized you despite your disguise, but her mind overrode her intuition. If I may be so bold, you and she have a friendship to die for."

"Tch. Dying's easy." Rainbow Dash smiled up at Blueblood. "Maybe I can't remember everything, but I know this much: my friends are worth living for."

It's So Tasty

The fanciest restaurant in town was all about the service. Elegant decor, waiters drawn from the finest of theatrical troupes (many of whom served here in month-long breaks between Equestria-wide tours, and said they experienced more drama in that month than in the whole of those tours), and a menu drawn from current trends in Prance, Saddle Arabia, and other foreign lands. Blueblood had snacked before coming, as the portions here were always dreadfully small; this place was about appearances, and it simply would not do to waste this opportunity to be seen with Twilight Sparkle. Separate though their domains and styles were, they were Prince and Princess, and the official record now showed they had just concluded business together. This dinner was about reassuring the public that their business was friendly and concluded well, as much as about anything else.

He was braced for Twilight to teleport in, but fortunately she had the grace to walk to their booth table once she arrived, though being personally escorted by the maitre d' may have clued her in. Her dress seemed a bit odd, being a dark blue outfit with what looked like stars, but it complimented his golden tuxedo. "Wow, I've never been in this place before," she commented as she squeezed into the booth opposite him.

Having already examined the one-page menu he had been provided with, Blueblood offered it to Twilight. "Mmmyes, well. I doubt this will be your last visit. I take it you are satisfied with Rainbow Dash's condition?"

"I am. And thank you for making sure that condition includes 'alive'." Twiight's eyes darted over the menu. "They almost threw me out of the hospital when I offered to help. Something about 'unlicensed medical practitioner'. Just because I haven't gotten a medical doctorate yet..."

"I have no doubt that you will acquire one in due time."

Twilight sighed. "Another thing on my to-do list. They say her memories will fully return by morning, but they're confining her to bed for a day given her injuries. It's a good thing she didn't try flying: the wing she landed on is busted. Heh, knowing her they may have to strap her to that bed even with that. Serves her right for stealing my transducer for pranks."

"I see. And then you debriefed Spitfire, correct?"

Twilight frowned in confusion.

"Err, you did say you would talk to her, didn't you?"

"Hmm? Oh! No, no, I did. It's just this menu..."

Blueblood smiled. "Oh, nopony here but the chefs can actually read it. Just order something from column A and something from column B-"

"I can read it," Twilight interrupted. "It's just Prench, Nipponyese, and that 'Neo-Draco' artificial language they keep passing off. Honestly, Equestrian works just fine for a language everyone can speak. But, umm..." She flipped the menu over, only to find the rear side blank, then flipped it back and looked at Blueblood. "These are all snacks, and I'm not seeing any prices. Where's the dinner menu?"

Blueblood blinked as his mind processed Twilight's declaration. "Err...that is, that is the dinner menu. Or what passes for it."

"Pardon me, mademoiselle." The maitre d', a graying earth pony with looks that could be the star of any fashion show runway he cared to grace, walked up. "I could not help but overhear. Did you say you can read the menu?" His accent was good, but Blueblood had spoken with enough actual Prench to know it was fake.

"Hmm? Oh, sure! I'll have an afalfacapala and a-" Blueblood's ears crossed at the sounds that next came out of Twilight's mouth. The one thing he was absolutely certain of, was that there was no way to represent it in the Equestrian alphabet. "-but keep the sauce mild please."

"Merci!" The maitre d' bowed. "The staff and I have been uncertain how to pronounce that item! You have our gratitude, and half price on your order!" He took the menu and ran off.

Twilight stared briefly as he left. "Weird. So, Spitfire. When I told her what happened she just got this weird look on her face, and asked if I could prepare a lecture or two on moral philosophy, why doing the right thing is the right thing to do. She said she'd get Rainbow Dash willing to listen. I'm actually kind of looking forward to it, assuming Spitfire can pull it off. I've been thinking of mixing Celestia's writings with some works of Cowfucius and Moohammad, and..."

Blueblood held up a hoof. "What matters is that Spitfire has a plan. Did she say anything else?"

"Oh! Right, sorry, got carried away. Hmm, now that you mention it she said this would be all the revenge she needed. I don't know how a lecture counts as 'revenge'." Twilight shrugged. "She also seemed worried about me. She kept asking variations on if I was alright. Eventually I confronted her on it, so she told me she was worried given how close I came to executing Rainbow Dash. I told her not to worry about it, since it didn't come to that. Umm..." She looked at Blueblood. "Should I be feeling bad about it?"

"Hmph. That is akin to asking water if it should be dry, Princess Sparkle. We performed our duty, and the result is another demonstration of fair and honest law for everypony."

Twilight frowned. "The result is that my friend is alive."

Blueblood massaged his forehead. "Princess Sparkle. While I am relieved to hear that that is how the case worked out, you must understand. Without the semblance of law and order, a great many ponies would seek to take advantage of their neighbors. Canterlot – nay, all Equestria would be a much darker and grimmer place. Celestia remembers such a time, and has given me more tales of it than I care to relay. All the suffering of one or two ponies, even ones such as us, would be as nothing compared to the collective sorrows were Equestria to return to those times. Whether we win or lose each individual case is ultimately less important than that justice is served. Ah, and speaking of serving..." He leaned back as the food arrived, along with the bill.

Twilight sighed. "Is that really the only way to look at it? You seem to care more about appearance than reality."

"Because I do. Because I must. As I said, my life for Equestria." He drove a fork into a stuffed mushroom as if stabbing at his life's pains. "Before you ask Celestia to lift my burdens, know that they are my life, and somepony must do what I do."

Twilight just looked at him, jaw open.

"Do I have something on my cheek again?" Blueblood dabbed at his face with a napkin.

"How can you be so blase about it? Whether ponies live or die depends on you doing your job well."

"That is precisely how I can be so 'blase', Princess Sparkle. To have any other attitude, to not see the masses above the individual..." He sniffed, and took a sip of wine. "I doubt I could perform to the standards that Equestria needs, any other way."

"I see," Twilight admitted after a few seconds mulling it over, then put a hoof on his foreleg. "You must not have many true friends."

Blueblood smiled. "You are wise to include that qualifier. I have...some...but most who would call me 'friend' are fair-weather at best. I would hope that I might not include you among that group."

Twilight chuckled. "Never! So, umm..." She glanced at the bill. "...mind if I get that? To thank you."

"If you would please. It is a tradition, at least between friendly councilors in Canterlot – which I would see those who spy upon us even now to see us as – that the loser buys the winner a meal. I must confess, I have been looking forward to this since I learned you would be my co-councilor. Royal purses are among the largest, so I doubt the bill will trouble you."

Twilight lifted one eyebrow, then eyed the bill. Then re-read it. "This is half price?!? This is robbery!"

"Welcome to Canterlot, Princess Sparkle." Blueblood raised his wine glass in toast. "Welcome back."

Author's Note

Chapter and story names are riffs on the video game It's A Wonderful World, better known as The World Ends With You. The chapter names summarize Blueblood's dominant thoughts during each chapter.

I could only tag 5 characters, so character tags are for those character who appear the most. For instance, the guard (the OC) and Rainbow (including her appearances in disguise) each appear more than Royal Ribbon.

Spitfire's planned follow-up consists of:
1) Asking Rainbow to visualize what would have happened if she had been found guilty: Twilight going through with the execution, perhaps dragging it out for better revenge, the disguise magic stopping (with nopony to keep it going) once Rainbow was finally dead, and Twilight's likely reaction (or, as Spitfire does not say, what Rainbow thinks would be Twilight's likely reaction),
2) Waiting through Rainbow's ensuing scream of terror until Rainbow starts begging for a way to make it right, and
3) Telling her to sit through, listen to, and heed some lectures from Twilight about law and responsibility so that this never happens again.