The Crossover

A thin vapor of humidity covered the dark room with the heat of ecstasy and sweat as the faint sounds of romance splashed out of the gray mare's sex. Thin lubricants swaddled the man's penis just enough to keep the steady rhythm of his hips swaying back and forth through the recipient's tightening orifice.

"Jeeze, Flitter. You weren't kidding about how flexible you were."

"Heh. Am I doing OK?"

"Shit. You're doing fantastic." The man turned his head past his shoulders while carefully keeping the movement of his pelvis at a steady pace. "Stu, is this not the craziest shit you've ever seen?" His friend gave him a thumbs up with one hand as his other danced up and down his shaft, keeping a grip firm enough for pleasure, but just delicate enough to keep him from pushing himself over the edge.

The man bent the pony over to the floor, raising her hips until they made the perfect curve into his lust-centered pelvic region. Breathing heavily as his speed picked up, he brushed his hair back and closed his eyes, mentally preparing himself for the sensation he had been building up between his legs.

"Oh, God. I can't last any longer."

"Ohhhh I want it so bad. Yes. YES! AAAHHH!!!"

With a final violent push, his hips stopped pumping to press against the pony's dripping nether regions, forcing his shaft as deep as it could go before his own liquid lust began to fill the insides. The mare's orifice pushed and pulled in the rhythm of her heartbeat while the man's shaft worked in tandem, pulsing a warm string of passion until it gradually faded into its original state.

As the man gently pulled his penis out between the mare's legs, the gray pegasus's cheeks began to glow a bright rosy red. "So..." she started. "Umm... So what did you think?"

"That was awesome!" Flitter smiled, but when she turned her head back to her sexual partner, she found that he wasn't even looking at her. He wasn't even speaking to her. His focus was glued to his friend, laughing like Flitter wasn't even within earshot anymore. "I wanna do that again. C'mon, let's see if I can fuck every pony at this party."

"You're crazy, man!" Stu said, stumbling over and laughing himself into a frenzy, but just as if it had never happened, both men began running as quickly as they could without falling over in a drunken stupor.

***

Light shimmered past the transparent blue drapes and landed squarely onto Stu's face, irritating his eyes enough to pull him from his dream world into a world where headaches were an unfortunate reality. Groggily pushing himself up with one hand and rubbing his eyes with the other, he took in a deep morning breath that he felt like he had been holding in all night long. Once he opened his eyes, though, he realized that not only wasn't he on his hotel bed, he was on the floor in some room he didn't even recognize. He felt around him until he found his glasses lying on the floor next to him, but when he put them on, he couldn't recognize the scenery any better than before.

"Phil?" He looked around for his friends, but it looked like he was alone in some kind of hallway. "Doug? Alan?"

Using all the energy his morning hangover would allow, he pulled himself to his feet and began searching through the corridor. After about a minute of meandering through the hallway, however, he found a pair of doors that were decorative like some kind of themed hotel room at the Excalibur, but that wasn't where he was supposed to be staying at. Sighing in frustration, he pushed the door open and began making his way inside.

"Doug? Phil? Alan?"

Just as he was beginning to grow anxious, though, he heard two voices coming from a room a little ways down. They didn't sound like anyone he knew, but at least maybe they'd be able to give him directions back to Caesar's Palace. As he grew closer, he could see two figures sitting on a couch playing Tony Hawk 3 on their PS2. Something wasn't right about them, th--

"Oh, God! Where am I?"

Stu quickly hid behind a potted plant a couple dozen feet away, heart beating as if something were chasing after him. After a few quick breaths, though, he turned his head and peered through the plant.

"Press the triangle button!" the taller white one shouted.

"I can't right now!" the smaller black one replied. "Do you see this combo right here? Plus I haven't added like any stats to my grind meter."

"You're gonna miss the achievement!"

"Shut up. I'm going for 30,000 points right now."

"How do you get points if you can't even grind? You've got like 500 points from doing ollies."

"Ollies are hard, dude."

"...I swear, listening to you speak is going to give me a brain hemorrhage."

Stu then slowly turned back around and began tiptoeing back the way he came, praying to God that they wouldn't be able to hear him. Once he was back into the hallway, he quickly ran back the other way towards where he woke up. Just up ahead, he saw a slightly-cracked door with a button up shirt hanging on the knob and didn't think twice before running inside and slamming the door shut.

There in the room was Phil, who began turning in his luxury bed and trying to block out the new sounds pulling him away from his dreams.

"Phil! Wake up!"

"Make Alan do it," Phil said, making himself more comfortable and pushing his mind back into sleep mode.

"Phil!"

"What?" Angrily, he threw his covers off of his shoulders and sat up, just to burst into laughter as soon as he opened his eyes. "Jesus Christ, what happened to you?" Just as Phil pulled the rest of the covers off of him, however, Stu began laughing himself.

"Wow," Stu said, stifling a chuckle.

"What?"

"Look at what you're wearing."

"Look at what you're not wearing!"

They both looked down and jumped back slightly in astonishment. Phil was wearing a black leather jacket edged with studs and tight, pink, sparkling leggings. Stu, on the other hand, was wearing nothing but a cape.

"My clothes!" Stu exclaimed. "What happened to my clothes?!"

"Forget your clothes," Phil said, laughing as he pointed to his friend's hip. "Try explaining that."

"What?" Turning his head and leg as much as he could, he could finally make out an image of a chair printed onto his butt. "What is that?! Is that a tattoo?!"

"It's a tramp stamp, dude."

"How the hell did I get a tattoo?!"

"Guys?" Both Phil and Stu turned their heads to find their overweight bearded friend poking half of his body out of a half-hallway that connected the room with the bathroom. His face was covered in chocolate, but that was almost to be expected from Alan. "I think you might wanna take a look in here. I don't think this came with the hotel."

Phil and Stu exchanged confused looks with each other before cautiously making their way towards the bathroom. Upon poking their heads into the room, they flinched at the sight of a pink pony who was covered in chocolate and passed out next to the toilet.

"Jesus, Alan," Phil said looking up and down the pink mess. "What is that?"

"I don't know," Alan replied anxiously. "I just woke up with it cradling my hips like some kind of pervert. I don't think we should go near it, guys."

"What, are you kidding? The thing looks hurt." Phil flashed Alan a smile, but it was obvious that his morbid curiosity was getting the better of him right now. "You're not just gonna leave it out here to die, are you?"

"It's probably carnivorous. If it attacks, I'll be the most vulnerable because of my bad ankles."

"Just relax, alright?" With another smile, Phil bent down and tapped on the pony's shoulder. "Hey there, sleepy guy. You alright?"

The pink mare then slowly flopped herself onto her back. "Ugggghhhhh. That's the last time I break an Equestrian record for most anything eaten at one time." As she pushed back her gag reflex, the three men above her began screaming in fear, grabbing onto each other as they quickly backed away.

"It just talked!"

"Holy fuck!"

The pony then propped herself up enough to get a good look at boys quivering in front of her. "Hey, guys," she said. "That was a crazy night, huh?"

"What?" Stu spat out, still trying to make sense of things. "What are you talking about? And why are you talking at all?"

The pink mare exchanged looks with the three men before quizzically saying, "I'm talking about the parties last night. Are... Are you guys OK? You all seem a little freaked out."

"Oh! My apologies," Stu said sarcastically. "We're just making conversation with a horse in some place that I don't even recognize. No reason to freak out, right guys?"

"I'm freaked out a little bit," Alan said raising his hand.

"OK, hold on," Phil interjected. "Do any of you remember how we got here?" Stu and Alan shook their heads, bringing Phil's attention back to the equine. "Listen, Miss Pink Horse--"

"Pinkie Pie."

"Listen, Pinkie... Pie... We got kinda fucked up last night. Can you tell us where we are?"

"I think we're in Celestia and Luna's castle."

"Yeah," Stu butted it, "but like where is that? Are we even in Las Vegas anymore?"

"Las Pegasus?"

Stu turned to the other two men and laughed sarcastically. "I can't even tell if we're speaking the same language. No, Las Vegas. You know, a place where they pretty much take all your money and run away with it."

"Soooo... Las Pegasus?" Stu facepalmed and turned away, beginning to lose his composure. "Well, no. We're in Canterlot."

"Yeah, but where is Canterlot?"

Pinkie Pie looked at the other two men, hoping one of them could answer better than she could, but as she soon realized, they were all waiting for an answer like Stu. "Do... Do you guys not remember anything from last night?"

The men all looked at each other, and finally they realized that not a single one of them remembered anything about the night before. Solemnly, they all shook their heads.

"Guys," Pinkie started as she thought about how she would break the news, "you're in Equestria."

Just as Pinkie broke the bad news, Phil felt a buzzing in his sparkling pants. He slapped his hand to his side and pulled his phone out frantically to see a familiar name in the caller ID.

"It's Doug," he said, switching looks between Stu and Alan. Quickly, he picked up the call and put the phone to his ear. "Hello?"

"Phil, where the hell are you guys?" the voice on the other line spoke. "New Year’s is over. We've gotta check out in like 30 minutes."

"Hey, Doug... Uh..." Phil looked to his friends again, silently asking what he should say, but as Stu shrugged his shoulders, it became painfully apparent that they had no idea what to tell him either. "Listen... We fucked up."