Chapters Pinkie the Genius I (Pinkie Pie)
Lazy Ponyville mornings were meant to be peaceful. With all the chores finished the night before, all the studying set aside to be finished in the evening, all the tasks and stresses waiting in the wings for their proper time, it should have been a calm, relaxed Twilight who joined Pinkie Pie in Sugar Cube Corner to spend some quality time together.
But Twilight was not relaxed. As she had walked into the bakery, she had seen Pinkie sitting alone in a corner, having breakfast: an apple, an orange peel bagel... and a cup of coffee. In fact, Twilight had walked in just as Pinkie was taking a long sip from her cup.
There wasn't much that could get Twilight more anxious than that.
She waved to catch Pinkie's attention and hurried over to the table. “Are you alright?” she asked.
“Course I am!” Pinkie replied. “Why wouldn't I be?”
Twilight tried to fake a shrug. “No reason.”
“Is it the bagel?” Pinkie held it up, sniffed it, turned it about in her hooves. “You're right. It's not my favorite. The Cakes made up a bunch of them this morning, so I thought I'd be polite and try it.”
“No, no, it's nothing,” Twilight said. She craned her head to see how much of the coffee had been consumed.
Pinkie followed Twilight's gaze, and she laughed. “Oh! You meant the coffee!”
Taking Pinkie's humor as a good sign, Twilight smiled and replied, “Yeah, I guess I did.”
“Mrs. Cake brews it up for me. I have it every morning!” Pinkie swirled the cup and offered it to Twilight, saying, “Wanna try it?”
“Uhh... depends. Is it decaf?”
“No, silly! Light roast, plus milk and six sugar cubes! Now, isn't that an odd number?” Pinkie laughed at her little joke, but after a moment, she added, “...Why? Is that a problem?”
“I don't know, Pinkie,” Twilight said. “The last thing we need is for you to be even more hyper than you already are!”
Pinkie set the coffee down and looked away towards the counter. “Would you have taken my coffee from me, Twilight?” she asked.
Twilight stopped smiling. “Come again?”
“Would you have stolen my drink from me if you'd walked in half a second earlier?” Pinkie asked again.
The question carried a strange edge which Twilight had never heard from Pinkie before. “I... I mean, you have to understand--”
“Well, of course I understand,” said Pinkie. “You said it yourself. I'd be completely out of control if coffee increased how hyper I was. What I don't understand is how you could think that was in the realm of possibility.”
“It seemed perfectly logical at the time...” Twilight said. She was babbling, like she'd been caught cheating by a teacher (something she'd never done, by the way).
Pinkie took another sip, then set it to the side with the rest of her food. “It seemed more logical to you that coffee would turn me insane than the idea that my hyperness is all an act?”
“It... it what?”
“I would have thought you of all ponies would have noticed that by now,” Pinkie said. “Everything I do is an act. The parties, the cheerfulness, the bouncing, the singing... all of it carefully constructed to match how other ponies expect to see me.”
Twilight shook her head. “That doesn't make any sense. You're Pinkie Pie; partying is in your blood! It's who you are!”
Pinkie laughed at that. “Don't you remember my sister Maud? That's my blood. I can be just as much that as anything else.” She waved a hoof over her face, and her smile disappeared. “The science of rocks is actually quite fascinating when you begin to look at them at the atomic level. The best rocks grow in fields that are regularly rotated to maintain even crystal deposition,” she intoned. Word for word, it was an eerily perfect imitation of Maud.
Twilight, for her part, latched onto that. “So is that the real you, then? And the cheerful Pinkie is the mask?”
“Of course not.” She waved her hoof the other way, and her face glowed with a smile. “This is me, Twilight! Your old, lovable pal Pinkie!” She pointed away, and her smile changed. “Darling, you simply must try on this chiffon cloak. It's to die for!” She pointed another direction, and her smile turned to a sneer. “Yeah, nopony's faster than Pinkie Pie! I'm the fastest runner in Ponyville!” Finally, she pointed directly at Twilight. “I, Professor Pie, suggest that you read over the chapter on magical resonance patterns again; your technique is getting quite rusty.”
Twilight smacked Pinkie's hoof to the side. “Stop that!” she cried out. “What are you trying to prove?”
“Just that I could be anything I wanted to be.” She picked up her apple, spun it on the tip of her hoof, then took a bite out of it. “I choose to be who I am. If I choose to be hyper, that's part of the show. And if I choose to drink coffee, well, that's my prerogative.”
“Then...” Twilight struggled to make sense of all this. “Then who is the real Pinkie Pie?”
“Who's the real Twilight Sparkle? Who's the real Rainbow Dash? You are who you appear to be. You're just as much of a construction as I am.” She shrugged and downed another swallow of coffee.
Twilight sat down and looked Pinkie in the eye. “You're deeper than you let on,” she said.
“Aren't we all.”
They sat there in silence, Twilight waiting for Pinkie to speak again, and Pinkie as mysteriously quiet as ever. They were interrupted by Mrs. Cake coming down the stairs with a tray of cinnamon rolls balanced on her back. “Oh, good morning, Twilight!” she said. “Would you like something to eat?”
“Oh! Right! Yes, a blueberry strudel and a cup of tea, please.”
“Oh, dear, I think we're out of tea, actually,” said Mrs. Cake. “Do you mind coffee? There's still some left over from the brew I made for Pinkie.”
“That'd be fine.”
“Pinkie, could you get those for her? I've got my hooves full at the moment.”
“Yep-eroony!” Pinkie replied. She bounced out of her seat and zipped over to the back room. In less than a second, she was back with what Twilight had ordered. “Here ya go, Twi! Cup of joe and a strudel-y-doodle! They're fresh out of the oven, well, other than those cinnamon rolls, but you get my drift!”
Twilight just stared back at Pinkie. “...No, actually. I don't get your drift at all.”
“Well, I guess I am pretty random after all. I'll catch you later, okay, Twilight? I've got a bunch of work to do.”
“O-Okay...” Twilight lifted her coffee cup with her magic (her resonance patterns were off, now that she thought about it) and stared into the quiet blackness. She looked up to catch Pinkie before she ducked into the back again. “Hey, Pinkie?”
“Yeah?”
“I'm... sorry about what I said earlier.”
“Hey, that's no big deal!” said Pinkie. “It was just a joke. I knew you were just playing.”
Twilight replied, “Well, if you ever want to talk... like we did back there... I'm here, all right? You don't have to pretend all the time.”
Pinkie stopped for a moment. “How do you know that that wasn't the pretending?” she asked. Then she winked and skipped away.
It was official, Twilight thought. She'd finally discovered something more anxiety-inducing than Pinkie drinking coffee. No, it was a thousand times worse: Pinkie was self-aware.
...Maybe.
Pinkie the Genius II (Pinkie Pie)
“Pinkie, how smart are you, really?”
Pinkie set down her mug of coffee and smiled. “Oh, so we're back to this, then?” she asked.
“The last time we talked like this, you showed a wise streak. So how deep does that go?”
“Twilight, you already know how smart I am!” Pinkie replied with a laugh. “Here, let's play a game. How many ponies are there in Sugar Cube Corner right now?”
Twilight tried to count them all, but it was rather busy for a Monday morning, and they wouldn't stay still. “Forty, fifty-odd?”
“Forty-six, but yes. You've met all of them, right? You know all their names?” Pinkie asked.
“I believe so.” Twilight pointed to one of the mares on the far side of the room. “Her, though. Her name is... Sunspot, I think? I've only talked to her once in passing.”
“It's Sunstripe, actually. She's 24, her birthday is on the 18th this month, her favorite food is a rose and Thousand Island dressing salad, and she's afraid of dogs.”
“You know all that about her?”
“I know all that and more about everypony in this room. I know all that and more about everypony in Ponyville. I could probably tell you the birthdays of all of their family members, too.”
Twilight just about laughed at that, were it not for the quizzically serious face on Pinkie Pie. “You can tell me...” She searched the room for a particularly uninteresting-looking stallion. “His birthday, his dad's birthday, and--”
“His birthday is June 4th, his dad's birthday is November 19th, and his mom was born June 11th and died September 30th, 995.”
“How do you know all that? Why do you know all that?”
“Well, the how is easy. I just asked!” Pinkie said with her cheerful grin.
“Why, though?”
“Because it's important to them, of course.” Pinkie shrugged. “If you wanted to, you could do it, too.”
“No way!” Twilight protested. “I may be smart, but even my brain doesn't have room for all that!”
“Can you name all the different types of stars?” Pinkie asked. “All the different spells you've learned? How much could you tell me about Spike; just start with his age and go from there?”
“Okay, so I do know a lot, but still. What are you getting at?”
“It's the funny thing about memory; it's not a finite storage. If your brain deems it important enough, it'll make the connections it needs.”
“So how can you memorize all that stuff about all the ponies you meet?” Twilight asked.
“Because it's important to me.” Pinkie waved her hoof out towards all the other ponies around them. “I need to know all those things so I can be the best possible friend to them.” Pinkie looked away; Twilight thought she saw something like a shadow fall over her eyes. “I have to be the best... It all has to be perfect...”
“Pinkie...” Twilight offered a hoof to her. “You know we all trust you to be the best friend we could ever have. You don't have to know every last thing about us for that to be true.”
“You don't see it, though! By your very nature you don't see it,” Pinkie replied. “If you see a pony moping in the streets, but you don't know it's his birthday and nopony's given him a 'Happy Birthday,' then how can you if you don't know it's his birthday? If you bake a pony a cake, but you don't know that they're allergic to eggs and they eat some just to be polite but then their whole face swells up, what kind of friend is that? If one little fact, one word in just the right place could rescue a pony from thinking that life isn't worth living anymore, then how can I allow myself not to know it?”
“You just do your best, Pinkie,” Twilight said. “Nopony can expect any more than that.”
“Ponies have surprisingly low expectations of themselves and others,” Pinkie murmured. “You'd be surprised how good your best really is.”
Twilight hesitated for a moment, unsure of whether she should say what was on her mind. But eventually, it came stumbling out of her. “So why did you decide to become a party pony, then? Is that... is that really your best?”
Pinkie shook her head. “What would you suggest I do instead?”
“I don't know!” Twilight said. “Become a scientist and make incredible discoveries. Become a politician and fight for ponies' rights. Something.”
“That sounds like what you think is important, Twilight,” Pinkie said simply. “I really don't care about all that. Making ponies smile is literally the only thing that matters to me. And what better way to do that than what I'm already doing?”
It suddenly hit Twilight like a thunderclap. “It's... it's not an act at all, is it, Pinkie?”
Pinkie nodded approvingly. “Now you're getting it,” she said. “I appear energetic because I love ponies so deeply that it bubbles out of me from every pore. I obsess over parties because I know it is the tool to bringing them happiness. The only 'act' is the filtration.”
“...Now you've lost me,” Twilight said.
“I am Pinkie the party pony. That is 100% me. But those personalities I showed you before – the rock scientist, the fashionista, the racer, the magical scientist – those are all 100% me as well. But all those other things? They don't matter to me. The potential is there, but I willingly cast them aside.”
“But if you're smart enough to be all of those, why can't they be part of your character? Why can't everyone see you like I see you right now?”
Pinkie scoffed. “I've said it a half-dozen times already, haven't I?” she asked. “It doesn't matter.”
“It doesn't matter? Of course it--”
“The universe doesn't need another Maud. It doesn't need another Rarity, or Rainbow Dash, or you. It needs Pinkie Pie, the wacky party pony. All this thought and philosophy? It has no place in that world.”
“That... is not an answer, and you know it, Pinkie. It could have a place, couldn't it?”
“What do you want me to say, Twilight?” Pinkie said. “I'm showing you this side of me because it makes you happy. I don't show this side to others because it doesn't make them happy. All I do, everything I am, is to make others happy.”
“And if you're all by yourself? Who are you then?”
“What makes me happy.” Pinkie took another sip of coffee, then added, “Funnily enough, it's pretty similar to how I am normally.”
“I don't… I...” Twilight felt like there was a question, an answer, somewhere inside her that lurked just out of reach. “But then why do you do foolish things for the sake of a joke? Don't you know better?”
“I think you just answered your own question there.” Pinkie laughed.
“I… wait...”
“I think that's enough for today, Twi,” said Pinkie. She hopped up from her seat and seemed to materialize a plate of cupcakes out of nowhere. “I've got to get back to work. Have a super-awesome-terrific day!”
“Oh! Right.” Twilight's own breakfast had sat untouched during the conversation. Even now, she sat utterly still, contemplating their discussion. At last, she made a decision. “Sunstripe!” she said, waving to her.
“Hmm?” She turned and, seeing Twilight, waved back. “What's up?” she asked.
“Would you like to sit and have a conversation with me?”
“Sure!” Sunstripe came over and sat down where Pinkie had been sitting. “What's brought this on?”
“Nothing, I guess. Just think I should know you a little better.”
"Good morning, Applejack!"
"Mornin', Twi." Applejack waved as Twilight came climbing up the path to Sweet Apple Acres. Twilight thought Applejack was impressive, the way she was always at work on some thing or another.
"What's going on, Applejack? Anything exciting?"
Applejack chuckled to herself. "Sorry, Twi. If you were lookin' for excitement, here's not the place to get it. Rainbow 'r Pinkie might be more your speed."
"Oh. Well, it's been a while since I've been by, so maybe I could stick around and chat?"
"'Appreciate the offer," Applejack said, "but I'm mighty busy today. Ain't gonna have much time for gossipin' like wood larks. Ah'll see you 'round, Twi." Then Applejack turned around and headed back into the barn.
"W-wait!" She hadn't expected Applejack to so quickly brush her aside. "Can't I stay, maybe help you with the work?"
"'Less you know howta bale hay and detangle all the brambles out'f it, you'd only be gettin' in the way. No, thank'ye kindly." She said all this without even turning around. She only kept pulling down her pitchforks and hay bale ties as she spoke.
"Come on, there really must be something I can do to help!"
Through gritted teeth, she responded, "Please, Twilight, you're distracting me."
"I'm sorry, I didn't... what?" It wasn't the words that stopped her this time, but the intonation. Whether Applejack had intended it or not, that one word--distracting--had carried more... more rancor than Twilight had ever heard in any one pony. As though it were only Twilight's position and magical power that kept Applejack from jumping on her and pummeling her into mulch.
Applejack must have read Twilight's facial expression, because she loosened her tensed-up muscles immediately and tried to smile. "I 'pologize, Twi, but I really am busy. Maybe we can meet up tomorrow. You could get the rest of the girls, make a day of it."
If that had been meant to assuage Twilight's concerns, it had the opposite effect. "Wait, is it just you and me, then? You don't want to hang out with me alone? What's the matter?"
Applejack's face darkened further. "Nothing's the matter, I'm just busy right now!"
That tone again! "If there's something you're not happy about with me, you can just say it, you know. I'm your friend; I can take it."
"Consarn it, Twi, I don't like you! Now leave me alone!" At this outburst, all of the pitchforks in her mouth tumbled to the ground, and she grumbled and cursed while she tried to pick them back up.
Twilight felt like her entire body had frozen up. Space and time seemed irrelevant in that moment. Everything was upside-down and wrong. "You... you don't... I... I don't... I can't..."
"Ah thought you said you could handle it," Applejack said.
"I thought I could, but to hear you say something like that..."
"What, that I don't like you? Why does that matter to you?"
"We're the keepers of the Cutie Map; before that, we were the Bearers of the Elements of Harmony. Being friends is literally in the job description!"
"No, it ain't!" Applejack turned on Twilight in an instant. "Mah 'job description' is to hang around with you, keep you from gettin' yerself killed, 'n teach you about Honesty! None of that, not a bit of that, says I need to like you."
"If you didn't like me, why would you hang out with me? Why would you protect me?"
"Because it's my job! Ah swear, do you even listen to anypony but yerself?" Applejack stormed over to the other side of the barn and waved her hooves about in an apoplectic fit.
"So you're only nice to me because you have to," Twilight said slowly, as though the words were in a foreign language.
"That's about the long 'n the short of it, yes." Applejack paused for a moment to catch her breath. She added, "Don't feel bad none, Twi. I don't like most ponies. I have to be nice to them when I'm sellin' apples, or when I'm savin' em from stampedes 'r whatnot. But I try t'keep my interaction with 'em to a minimum. Livin' on an orchard miles from the rest of 'em helps an awful lot."
"So who do you like--"
"My family," Applejack said, quick as light. "Ah love them with everythin' I've got."
"...Right." Her head was still swimming, so she sat down and tried to put her life back together while Applejack got back to work collecting her hay-baling supplies. “...Can I ask…?”
“Hmm? Oh, why I don't like you?” Applejack asked. “Thought I'd made it clear by now. You're uppity, smug, self-centered, a know-it-all, and too ambitious for my liking. You think your magical powers and your transformation into a princess make you better than ponies like me with our hooves on the ground. Honestly, I don't know how the rest of them get along with you. Maybe they fake it, too.”
“They don't! They're not completely heartless like you!”
“Oh, really?” Applejack stomped over towards her, almost sneering. “Ya don't think Fluttershy's dead terrified of you and only treats you nicely 'cuz she's afraid you'll stop being nice to her at any moment? Ya don't think Rarity's jealous of yer position and yer background, and that she only treats ya nice 'cuz she thinks it'll get her a marriage with some snooty prince? Rainbow Dash thinks you're just a joke when you're not being a stick in the mud, and Ah think Pinkie Pie speaks for herself.”
Twilight gasped. She'd only just had that conversation with Pinkie. Had Applejack figured out Pinkie's “facade” all on her own? She found herself struggling to come up with the words to definitely prove Applejack wrong. There was that one time… no, she'd only been helping with a problem then. There was that picnic… but no, all six of them had been there, so they all would have been trying to look nice in front of everypony else. The Amblene paradox at its finest, she thought to herself. But if that were true…
“Do any of our friends like any of the others?”
“Couldn't tell ya.” Applejack shrugged. “Not my problem.”
“You've…” Twilight swallowed, but her voice wouldn't rise out of a death-whisper. “You've ruined everything. Every time I talk to one of them, I'll be second-guessing our conversation. Is Rarity actually being generous, or is she just trying to schmooze me? Does Fluttershy want me around at all, or is she one breath from bolting? I… I feel so alone now. Like I'm back to that little filly in Canterlot… It's all gone.”
“You're welcome. Now please.” Without turning away from her tools, she gestured to the barn door.
Twilight took a few slow steps in that direction, but she needed to get one last barb out of her system. “I… I don't ever want to see you again, Applejack.”
“Sorry, but it don't work like that.” Applejack hefted the pitchforks and balanced them on her shoulder. “We've still got our jobs to do.”
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Glamour and Glitter, Fashion and Fame II (Rarity)
“Goodnight, everypony! Thank you for coming!”
While Rarity escorted her friends out of her house, Twilight stood back and played with the dress rack near the back. Rarity wanted to tell Twilight something important; it was probably about what she'd said earlier that week regarding Rarity's magical power. It wasn't often you were told you were one of the most powerful unicorns of all time. With any luck, Rarity would realize what a gift she'd been given and not squander it.
“Thirteen.”
“Sorry?” Twilight turned around.
"I went and consulted a thaumatic specialist regarding my magical potential. He said I'm the thirteenth strongest unicorn in history. So saying it was me, you, and Starswirl, in that order , was gilding the lily somewhat, my dear."
Twilight blushed. "I guess so. I was a bit caught up in the moment. Still, thirteen is nothing to sneeze at. There are how many unicorns in Equestria? Thirteenth has to be at least three sigma."
"Something like that." She paused, fiddling with one of the dresses next to her. "It's a funny thing, you know. When you were young, Twilight, you knew for sure you would be magically talented, even when you weren't. It was all part of your self-image. But I? My magic was always just a tool to be used as part of my real passion. But this is so... important, isn't it? The things I could do with magic this powerful..."
"I never wanted you to abandon your goals, Rarity," Twilight said. "You're Rarity the dressmaker, and you shouldn't change that. But if you go to Celestia's school as an adult applicant, you could hone your magic and learn how to use it--"
Rarity raised a hoof. "Twilight, no. Let me ask you this. How many hours per day were classes?"
"Eight, but the adults usually only do half that."
"And how many hours outside of class did you study?"
"Four or five, but that was just me being--"
"I know, dear, but if my power is in your range, I'll have to study that much as well. So to get to the same level as you, I would need to devote eight hours a day to it. I need to sleep, just like anypony, and interact with friends and clients, so where would dressmaking go? I have an entire franchise to manage, not to mention my own business here in Ponyville. You're asking me to pick up a second job, for a skill I don't particularly care about, just because I'm the thirteenth most powerful magic user of all time."
Twilight sighed. "I know, I know. But I just can't help but imagine what you could achieve with the proper study."
"To what end?" Rarity asked. "I will never be Starswirl, even if I'm close in potential. I will never be you. I'm already doing what I love, so what would be the point?"
"How do you know you won't get anything out of it if you don't try?"
Rarity paused. "Well, there is one thing. The magical specialist wasn't the only pony I discussed this with."
"Oh?" Twilight said. "Whom else did you discuss this with?"
"I..." Rarity blushed. "I sent a letter to Shiverstone. And he responded."
Twilight boggled at this. "You sent a letter to one of the most reclusive magical prodigies, and he sent one back? What is he, number 6?"
"Number 8, once you add Starlight Glimmer and that young prodigy colt from Tailahassee. And as it turns out, Shiverstone is quite the gentlecolt, given the motivation to talk to me."
"What did you do, woo him with a pretty picture of yourself?" Twilight paused, noticed Rarity's blush, and facehoofed. "That's exactly what you did, isn't it."
"Before you get any ideas!" Rarity sputtered. "I'll have you know we've firmly established a strictly platonic relationship in our letters. Solely regarding my magical tutelage, nothing more."
"Your magical tutelage? What is he teaching you?"
Rarity pulled out one of the crystal projectors they'd discussed last time. "I never realized other fashion designers needed these to do what I could do without thinking. I figure, if I can learn how to make these, I could sell them on the side, make a little bit of profit off of that. And if my special talent really is crystals, then maybe I'll learn more about it from Shiverstone. I can find my own little niche in the field of magical study, as it were."
"I feel as though I need to apologize," said Twilight. "I know cutie marks can be interpreted in multiple different ways, and I never meant to suggest--"
"I understand, Twilight." Rarity walked away and stared out of the window. "You've heard my cutie mark story, yes, Twilight?" Twilight nodded. "Then you understand how I got the interpretation for my cutie mark I did. I saw an ugly rock, then discovered the beauty within it. That is my special talent. In fashion, that's taking a normal dress and making it spectacular. In friendship, it's bringing out the best in those I spend time with. And with magic... who knows? But if I can't use it to make the world more beautiful, I don't care."
Twilight smirked. "Like that time you got possessed by dark magic, right?"
"I swear, you get obsessed with turning the whole world into your own vision of perfection once, and you never live it down." Rarity laughed and shook her head. "But there is one thing I learned from that whole debacle. There isn't one type of beauty, and it doesn't always conform to my vision. Ponyville does not always need my intervention to become beautiful, when it already has its own wonderful charm."
"...Hmm."
"What's that, dear?"
"Oh! Nothing." Twilight sat up and brushed herself off. "I was just thinking about how... well, you don't need my intervention to become beautiful, when you have your own wonderful charm."
"Why, darling, I'm flattered you think I'm beautiful. I didn't know you thought of me that way." She magicked up a fan in front of herself and batted it in front of herself coquettishly.
This time, Twilight blushed. "Y-you know what I meant! You don't have to become my vision of 'a pony with powerful magic.' That's entirely your decision, and I respect that."
"Thank you, Twilight. I've figured it out my way, but I never would have known without your counsel. So, thank you, darling." She gave Twilight a fierce hug, and Twilight returned the gesture.
After a few seconds, Twilight whispered into Rarity's ear, "You know what we still have to do, though."
"What?" Rarity asked, leaving Twilight's embrace.
"A magic contest! Didn't you do any in your magic classes?" Twilight asked.
Rarity gave a gentle cough. "Ahem. I, er, didn't actually take any. When I opened up the boutique, I was still in school, and my teacher let me take half-classes so I could run the store. I'm entirely self-taught."
"No. That's..." Twilight put her face in her hooves. "Rarity, you're amazing, you know that, right?"
Rarity gave a wide smile. "My dear, of course I do. Now, you were saying something about a contest?"
What's In a Name? (Fluttershy)
Twilight was having tea with Fluttershy like she did every Tuesday. It was one of the few regular things she did with her friends. Everything she'd been told the past few days was still jostling about in her mind, so she wasn't making much for conversation. Finally, though, she offered to Fluttershy, "Are you... afraid of me?"
Fluttershy retreated behind her wing, a gesture Twilight hadn't seen in a while. "...A little, yes," she replied.
"When you talk with me... do you want to run away?"
"...No." With effort, she put her wing back in place and sat up straight again. "I trust you, Twilight. I like having you as my friend. You... challenge me."
Twilight didn't know what to say to that. After a few seconds, Fluttershy said, "Can I ask you a question?"
"Sure."
"How do parents choose their foals' names?"
"That's a really big question, Fluttershy," Twilight answered. "Some families use surnames, like Pinkie's, while others prefer theme naming, like mine or the Apples. It really depends."
"But how do they choose accurate names?" Fluttershy insisted. "Are the parents prophetic?"
"No, nothing like that." Twilight shook her head. "As far as I'm aware, magic can't predict the future. They just choose a name they like."
"So why would my parents name me Fluttershy?" she asked. "Did they want me to be shy, or..." She slumped down on her cushion, distraught.
Twilight looked on sympathetically. "I couldn't say," she answered. "They really should have told you why when you were younger."
Fluttershy shook her head. "Well, they didn't. They rarely spoke to me back then. They probably don't even know I've left Cloudsdale."
She said that so straightforwardly, yet when Twilight thought about it, the concept was absurd. "Fluttershy, that was over ten years ago. When you 'left Cloudsdale,' you almost died . How could they not know you're gone?"
"Either they don't know or they don't care." She sighed and looked away. "You'd understand if you had been shy when you were younger."
"But I was shy when I was younger!" Twilight sat up and unwittingly shifted into her "teacher voice." "When I was just a filly, I was so engrossed in books and learning that I hardly ever talked. I had no friends, and--"
"Twilight, you weren't shy," Fluttershy interrupted her. "And you had friends."
"What? Of course I didn't! That was the whole point of coming to--"
"Moondancer? Twinkleshine? You didn't spend time with them, but you were friendly to them, and they were friendly to you." Fluttershy began to tear up. "You didn't have bullies... You didn't fear the universe..."
"Oh..." She'd never thought of it like that. She'd assumed for some bizarre reason that the lowest you could be on the "friendship meter" was zero, rather than negative... "I'm so sorry, Fluttershy. I hadn't thought..."
"It's okay. I understand." Fluttershy sniffed and tried again. "But that comes back to my name. Why would my parents name me Fluttershy?"
"Again, I don't know," Twilight replied. "It's a fairly common name for pegasi, though. The 'flutter' part is pretty self-explanatory, and the 'shy' part helps it sound like 'butterfly.'"
"But did I become shy because my name had 'shy' in it? Or did people treat me as though I were shy because of my name, and I changed to fit their expectations?"
"I don't know," Twilight said again.
Fluttershy held her forehooves in front of her face and stared at an invisible potentiality. "I don't want to be shy... It's given me nothing but pain my entire life... Not even my parents love me... But I can't change it... From as soon as my parents named me, I was trapped..."
"Fluttershy..." In a snap decision, Twilight teleported to the other side of the table and wrapped her in a hug. "Your parents may not care about you, but we do. We love you."
Fluttershy flinched for a second, then the words came tumbling out of her, like she didn't want to say it. "And yet you didn't know about my parents."
"...What?"
"No, I'm sorry, that came out wrong, I--"
"Talk to me, Fluttershy!" Twilight insisted.
"Y-you say you appreciate me, but you don't know anything about me, who I am, who I was..."
"I..." That was... technically true, Twilight thought. But she felt it wasn't as simple as that. "But we're trying to. We're trying to help you open up so we can learn all that!"
"So you pity me." Fluttershy looked up at Twilight with liquid eyes that were filled with pain. "You think I'm broken, and you're trying to fix me."
"What? No!" Twilight backed up as she tried to fix the words in her head.
"No, I understand. I think I'm broken, too." Fluttershy heaved a sigh and looked over to her animal pens. "I think that's part of why I love taking care of animals so much. Because when I see them hurt and sick, I see them as broken like me."
That clicked in Twilight's head. "That's not it, Fluttershy. You're not kind and nurturing because you're broken. You're kind and nurturing because you're you. That's what we love about you. That's why we want to be your friend. Because you are tender and sweet and oh so smart, and you've known suffering but you soldier on anyway." Twilight flew into Fluttershy's embrace and held her even firmer than before. "You are a wonderful pony, Fluttershy. And nothing, not even being shy, can take that away."
A weak trickle of tears pattered down Twilight's back as Fluttershy cried. "I've n-never, not once, heard something like that before. Thank you, Twilight."
They stayed like that for a while, until Twilight finally let her go. "Fluttershy..." she began, "if you wanted to... change your name, maybe, I'm sure all of our friends would support it."
Fluttershy smiled and gave a weak laugh. "I suppose, but... what about the butterfly thing? It is my cutie mark, after all." She tipped her head. "And how did they--"
"Seriously, I don't know." Twilight laughed. "You could go with 'Fluttersweet,' I guess, or 'Flutterby.' The 'flutter' part still kinda references it."
"I'll have to think about it." She paused and said again, "Thank you, Twilight. Really."
"Of course." Twilight teleported back to her spot, where her tea was starting to get cold. On a whim, she added, "Seriously, we love you, you know that?"
"Mm-hmm. Better than I did before." Fluttershy smiled and took a sip from her own teacup.
"I'm glad." Twilight sipped some tea as well, and the tea party resumed like nothing had happened.
Halted in Motion (Rainbow Dash)
"You secretly don't want to join the Wonderbolts."
"Nope." Rainbow Dash idly filed her forehoof while Twilight attempted another guess. Twilight had dragged her here to the library to have an "emergency meeting," whatever that was supposed to be. So far, it'd been pretty un-emergency-ful. ...If that was a real word.
"You secretly look down other ponies because they're not as cool as you."
"No. Well, kinda, but that's not really a secret." Rainbow Dash stuck out her tongue while Twilight sighed.
"You want to be the fastest because someone in your life suffered when you weren't fast enough."
"Uh, no. I want to be the fastest because being fast is awesome!"
"Your mane isn't really rainbow-colored!"
"WHAT?!" Rainbow Dash snickered, then fell on the ground laughing. "Really? Why do you think I'd be called Rainbow Dash if my mane wasn't really rainbow-colored?"
"It's a possibility!" Twilight retorted.
"Well, nope. I'm a natural rainbow." She picked herself back up and shook her head with another chuckle. "Got any other wild guesses for me?"
"You're... you're a colt!" Twilight tried.
"...No." Rainbow looked at her askance. "That'd be weird, Twilight. Where'd you come up with something like that?"
"Well, it's gotta be something!" Twilight burst out. "So far, I've talked with all of my friends, and they've all had some wild secret about how they change themselves based on their appearance!"
"Twilight, you already know my secret about my appearance!" She pulled out a copy of a Daring Do novel from one of the library shelves and tapped the front cover. "Remember? 'Reading is for eggheads?'"
"Right... you hide parts of yourself so others see you as cool." Twilight frowned and sulked.
"That not exciting enough for you?" Rainbow asked.
"Not really, no."
"Well, hey! How about I figure out your secret, then?" Rainbow said.
Twilight scoffed. "Don't be ridiculous. I don't have any secrets!"
"We'll see about that." Rainbow flapped about in the air as she pondered the question. "Hmm... major traits of Twilight... magic, books, Celestia... ah, let's start there!" Rainbow Dash landed and pointed at Twilight. "Why do you like books so much, huh?"
Twilight seemed bemused at this. "I've always loved books, Rainbow. They're so much fun, and there's so much to learn!"
"Any book?" Rainbow probed. "Any book at all?"
"Sure!"
"How about this one?" Rainbow flew up and grabbed the biggest book she could find. Twilight winced as it thudded against the ground. The Pre-Equestrian Tax Code and Civil Law Compendium ; it was the largest tax code ever devised before Triponian created the much-simplified Ethicae Equestriae , a mere 15 pages of simple, non-jargonistic text. The Compendium , by contrast, was literally 100 times longer, and used so much legal verbiage that some of the terms literally had no modern translation, and nopony had any idea what they meant.
"Yup! There's so much to learn from the Compendium , even if it's just to know what not to do!" Twilight replied, still chipper as ever.
"Really? Ugh, of course you would say that." Rainbow shook her head and changed tactics. "Moving on. Celestia's your biggest role model, right?"
"Mm-hmm! Ever since I was young, I've wanted to become as great a mage as she is!" Twilight replied.
"Well, what about before that? What did you think of her, then?"
"Well..." Twilight strained to remember. "It was a while ago. But I'm sure I thought she was marvelous and kind, and that she always rules fairly yet justly."
"Uh huh..." Rainbow had a dangerous gleam in her eye that Twilight didn't seem to like. "And what about magic? Have you always wanted to be a mage?"
"Ever since I was little, I've emulated my ancestor, Vespers, in studying--"
"That's enough," Rainbow interjected. "Lightning round time!"
"Lightning round--?"
"Favorite food, go!"
"Uh, uh, steamed broccoli!"
"What do you think of Spike, go!"
"He's a good kid, keeps me stable, why--"
"How to be a good pony, go!"
"Follow the rules, stay out of trouble, don't--"
"Aaaaand got it." Rainbow Dash smirked and lazed back in her flight pattern. "I know your secret."
"Wuh-huh?" Twilight did a double-take. "How could you possibly know something just from that? I don't see a pattern."
"All right, I'll take it slow." Rainbow Dash leaned in and drew a line with her hoof. "What did all those questions have in common?"
Twilight didn't see it. "I... don't know. You asked about my favorite things, my system of morality, what I think of others--"
"No, no, not that!" Rainbow Dash shook her hooves and tried again. "Think about why you answered those ways."
"I don't know why I answered them that way!" Twilight replied. "That's just how I think!"
"Ugh! Who told you that reading was important?"
"My parents, probably, but--"
"And who told you that Celestia was a wise, kind ruler?"
"Probably my parents again, but--"
"And who told you that broccoli was delicious?"
"Nopony!" Twilight snapped. But then, she started to realize what Rainbow was getting at, and she cooled down. "But..." she mused, "my parents served it a lot, and I wouldn't want them to feel bad..."
"Okay, now tell me," said Rainbow, "what's something you like, something you know is good, that you decided was good recently ?"
Twilight paused. "I'm sure I could think of something if I thought about it for a while."
"I'll save you the trouble." Rainbow touched down and looked Twilight in the eye. "You wanna know your secret? Here it is: you're a child."
"I... what do you mean?" But Twilight already knew what Rainbow meant.
"You're a child. Young, innocent, eager to please. You love books because your parents said you were supposed to, so you became the epitome of 'a pony who loves books' to maximize their love for you."
"That's not-- it couldn't be--!"
"You studied magic because your parents said you were supposed to. You love Celestia because you're supposed to. Everything you are is because somepony else decided it for you!"
"No, no, no!" Twilight stomped (like a petulant child, she noted) and turned away. "I don't want to hear any more of this!"
"But I'm not done." Rainbow flew over Twilight's head and landed in front of her. "You know everything there is to know because you read so much, but you don't think . You accept blindly what others tell you because you don't trust your own judgment." Rainbow Dash gestured with her wings over herself. "Me? I chose who I am. I see all the other possible ways to be cool, and I chose mine . But you? You're a child; you're not old enough to think for yourself."
"Please... no more..." Twilight gasped and put a hoof to her mouth. "No more..."
In an instant, Rainbow Dash's mood changed. "Oh my gosh, Twilight, I'm sorry! I was just trying to lecture like you do!" She threw a wing over Twilight and pulled her in. "I didn't mean to overdo it."
"Is that true?" Twilight asked, still sniffling. "Am I really just a child?"
"I dunno," Rainbow Dash replied, "I was just saying all that stuff 'cuz you asked me to. It sounded like it made sense, so I said it." Rainbow Dash scowled and kicked the floor. "I'm not very good at keeping my mouth shut."
"It's okay, Rainbow." She tried to smile, but it hurt to do so. "I know you meant well."
"Still, though." Rainbow thought for a while, then smiled. "You know, maybe you are still a child. But you're still cool in my book!"
This time, Twilight smiled for real. "You really think so?"
"Hey, you do cool magic, you're a princess; what's not to love?" Rainbow suddenly grew serious. "But if you're going to think you're cool, you have to think it because you think it. Not because I said so."
"Oh... right."
"Look..." Rainbow shrugged and looked away. "I'm really not the one to ask for lessons on maturity. I'm not much of a parent; I'm barely much of a sister. But if it were up to me, I'd say... get dirty!" She laughed and flew in a big circle. "Make mistakes, break the rules! You'll only find out who you really are if you break away from the expectations you've had put on yourself."
"Right." Twilight stood quietly for a few seconds, still trying to piece together everything Rainbow had told her. "So... what expectations did you have put on you?"
Rainbow suddenly put on the brakes, nearly crashing into the floor. She didn't seem to want to talk at first, but she managed to strain out, "You know how I dropped out of Flight School, right?" Twilight nodded. "That was why. And why you never hear me talk about my parents... that's why." Rainbow started to shake, almost imperceptibly. "I wanted to become the greatest flier in Equestria, so I abandoned everything and everypony in my old life. I... I chose who I am," she choked out. "I couldn't let who I was hold me back."
"Oh, Rainbow..." Twilight teleported over and embraced her. "That takes a lot of strength. I don't know anypony else who could do it."
Rainbow kept crying, though she tried to hide it from Twilight seeing. "I'm not strong, Twilight. I'm a coward."
"You are strong, Rainbow!" Twilight said. "And you're not a coward. Wouldn't I be the coward; I, who couldn't stand up against her parents?"
"...Maybe." Rainbow sniffed. "But I still ran away."
"You ran forward ," Twilight replied. "And that's definitely better than standing still."
Rainbow Dash smiled. "...Heh. Well, maybe we can learn from each other, then, huh?"
"Yeah." Twilight smiled too. "We'll both keep pushing forward, deciding who we are, right?"
"Right." Rainbow Dash jumped back into the air and flew about in lazy circles. "I'll keep being the coolest pony in Equestria, and you... who do you want to be?"
Twilight thought for a moment. "I... don't know." Then, with a broad smile, she repeated, "I don't know! Isn't that exciting?"
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Glamour and Glitter, Fashion and Fame I (Rarity)
After her horrible meeting with Applejack, Twilight had sought out Rarity, a pony with a strong head on her shoulders. She'd caught her in the middle of an order, but Rarity was more than able to listen while she worked. Once Twilight mentioned that Applejack didn't like her, Rarity nodded. "Ah, so you got the 'hates everypony but herself' speech, I take it?"
Twilight sobbed and nodded her head. "You've heard it, too, then?"
Rarity unsuccessfully held back a laugh. "Darling, we've lived in the same town our entire lives. I'm quite well aware what she's like on the inside. You mustn't let it get to you."
"How can I do that? One of my best friends, and she can barely stand to look at me..."
"And yet she still works with you, right?" Rarity waved her thimbled hoof towards Twilight. "Maybe that's all you can stand on. So long as she maintains that appearance while out and about, you can stay amicable. You stay within the lines, and she'll stay the same friend she's always been."
Twilight sighed. "I suppose you're right. It's just... strange, the way she pretends to be someone she's not."
"It's not so strange. We all do the same thing." Rarity smiled, then waved Twilight close conspiratorially. "You may not know this, but my accent, as it were, is merely an affectation."
Twilight laughed at that. "Rarity, everypony knows that."
"Oh, of course, but that's not the point, is it? The point is, it establishes an appearance. Dress like the pony you want to be, not the pony you are, as the saying goes. Again, nopony knows that better than me."
"...Does that mean you're just friends with me to get up into Canterlot?"
Rarity sighed. "So you got that speech, too. The 'everypony else is just like me' one." At Twilight's nod, she rolled her eyes. "Two of Applejack's screeds; no wonder you're so broken up. The answer to the question is: no, that's not why I'm friends with you. I am using you to climb the social ladder, but that's not why we're friends."
To hear it so plainly threw Twilight for a loop at first. "You are? But..."
"Twilight, do I hurt you? Do I ever make you do anything you don't want to do?"
"No, but..."
"Persuasion is a funny thing, dear. An eye flutter here, a compliment there, and ponies will do whatever you like. So long as they don't feel pressured into doing something, I see no problem with that. Do you?"
"I suppose not." It still sounded dirty, but there wasn't a flaw in Rarity's logic, near as she could tell.
"Well, there you have it, then!" Rarity beamed, and Twilight felt her heart skip a beat. She'd never thought of it before, but Rarity's presence was powerful . With that recent point hashed out, Twilight could now analyze gestures like this. A smile like that put you at ease, made you feel as though everything was okay. It was like the stern teacher whose stare brooked no argument, only using weaponized cheer rather than disappointment.
"I think... I think I feel better. I guess I'll go home and--"
"Oh, no, Twilight, you just arrived!" Rarity said. "It would be rude of me not to offer you something. Would you like some tea perhaps, water, orange juice?"
"Orange juice sounds good."
"It's in the fridge. I'd get it myself, of course, but..." She gestured helplessly towards the dress she had pillowed over herself.
"That's fine, Rarity, I can get it." Though again, Twilight had noted Rarity's expressions. The subtle insistence to make her stay, the puppy-dog eyes to make her go herself and not make Rarity get up. As she went towards the kitchen, she knocked on her head to get those out of her head. If she kept watching for every single persuasive trick Rarity used, she'd be here all day.
***
It took her a pathetically long time to find the orange juice. Rarity had tucked it all the way in the back, camouflaged next to the milk cartons. Once she'd found it, she poured a glass for herself and headed back into the main lobby where Rarity was working. But the moment she stepped in, she just about spilled it on herself. Rarity had finished the stitching she'd been doing and had apparently moved on to reorganizing her stock. All at once . There was only one other unicorn Twilight had ever seen doing that much magic work all at once.
Herself.
She tried to find a subtle way to get Rarity's attention; the closest she could come up with was loudly coughing. Rarity's eyes widened to the size of dinner plates, and she swerved a mannequin out of the way of Twilight's head. She then quickly set everything down and fawned over a single dress next to her. "Oh, Twilight! I forgot you were here!"
"What was that?!" Twilight asked, her mouth still agape.
"Oh, nothing," Rarity replied. "I don't like to work 'in the zone' in company. As you can see, I'm not much for conversation in that state."
"I don't care about the conversation!" Twilight said. "You're incredible! How can you do all that at once?" she asked.
"It's all in the fine details, dear. I'm a fashionista, so it's not so unusual, really. You do much better than me every day."
"Rarity," Twilight explained slowly, "I'm four sigma. Literally one of the most magical ponies in Equestria. If you're comparing yourself to me, you are too."
"...I don't follow. Are you saying I'm... good with magic?" Rarity asked.
"No. I'm saying you're probably one of the top five magically-endowed unicorns of all time ."
"Now, Twilight," she said, laughing, "surely that's an exaggeration! Little old me, one of the most powerful unicorns of all time?"
"I wouldn't have believed it either if you hadn't just done it," Twilight said. Suddenly, a thought occurred to her. "Those audiovisual tricks, back when you made us dresses for the Gala. Did you do those yourself?"
"Yes, of course." Rarity seemed confused at this. "But all designers do those for their shows."
"With about a half-dozen pre-charged crystal projectors, maybe." Twilight produced an example from her magical storage. "They take about two weeks to make at home, or they cost about thirty bits from a high-end store. And you do it without breaking a sweat."
With those solid numbers, Rarity finally understood just what Twilight was saying. "One of those most powerful..."
"You, me before I ascended, Star Swirl, Vespers, Meadowbrook. Possibly in that order ."
"No... no, you must be mistaken. I'm just a fashion designer. I'm not a magician!"
"You're not, but you could be," Twilight pleaded. "You're a little old for my alma mater, but Celestia might take you on--"
"No, thank you, Twilight."
"--if you wanted... no?"
"That's right."
Twilight thought about this for a moment. "I know it's really sudden, Rarity, but this could be huge for you, for your businesses--"
"I said no, Twilight." Rarity huffed. "I am a fashionista. That's all I am, and that's all I want to be."
"One last thing, then." Twilight pulled a book out of her storage and gave it to Rarity. "Your cutie marks aren't diamonds."
Rarity screwed up her face, holding back some expletive, surely. "Twilight, dearest, I think I know what my own cutie mark is. They're diamonds."
"If they were diamonds, you'd see them from their side. They're not diamonds. They're crystals ." Twilight turned the pages to the very end, where she pointed out three symbols. "There are three symbols that directly represent magic: the star of Vespers, like mine; the patterned swirl; and the magical crystal. And the more you have, the more powerful you are. Star Swirl was a legend because he had two. You have three ."
The book fell from Rarity's magic with a clunk. "I need you to leave right now, Twilight."
"You're not--"
"No, I'm not mad. But I do need you to leave."
"What's the--"
"You've just changed everything I knew about my life. I need some time to think, Twilight. Alone."
"All right." Twilight slipped out the door. She'd have to just wait and hope to hear Rarity's response. Although... Twilight wasn't sure whether she wanted to hear that Rarity would go for a study program or that she wouldn't. Either way, things couldn't be the same.