Nope Chronicles #1 - The Pegasus Epidemic

Chapter 2: I need The Doctor

Berry Punch gallopped along the hoofpath, through the park, over a hill and out of Nope's sight.  Once she cleared the hill, she slowed her pace down a bit, and reached into her mane.  She felt around for a moment before a shocked expression came over her face.   "Where's my bleedin' booze?!" she shouted, causing a nearby filly to jump back in surprise.

Realizing that she was out of vodka, she altered her initial path slightly and raced down another route, leading to another part of town.  She darted around a corner, vaulted over a fence, leapt onto a hay cart, pushed it slightly and rode it down a hill. Once she got down the bottom, she galloped over to a large stack of barrels, guarded by Big McIntosh.

Berry leapt in over him and swiftly climbed to the top of the stack.  Once she grabbed the highest barrel, she threw it up in the air, front-flipped onto the ground and caught the barrel on her back and retreated before Big Mac realized that she had stolen an entire barrel of cider.

She dashed through the streets of PonyVille, still carrying the barrel on her back.  Ponies walking by ignored her, as they had seen crazy stuff happen in PonyVille multiple times before to the point where it didn't spark confusion any more.  She passed Lyra and Bon Bon who were drinking some juice at a table, then she passed Colgate who was examining a strange signature on a wall made by a sharpie pen.

At last Berry reached her destination; a tiny cottage nestled between two houses.  She placed 'her' barrel next to the doorstep before tapping on the wooden door.

"Who is it?" A Estuary English voice replied, muffled by the door.

"It's Berry Punch," she replied, glancing behind her.

The door was pulled open from the inside, and Berry Punch was greeted by a light brown stallion with spiked dark hair.  His cutie mark showed a golden hourglass with some sand in it.  In his hooves he held a short silver and blue rod in the shape of a screwdriver.

Berry walked inside, bringing the barrel in with her.  She had been inside this cottage countless times before, so she didn't pay attention to the fact that the interior was vastly greater in size than the exterior.  The centre of the room had a beacon of orange light that reached the ceiling, surrounding the beacon were several dials, levers and buttons.  But as far as Berry was concerned, the controls served no purpose.

She rolled the barrel to a water tap and connected it to the barrel using a hose.  A cupboard rested underneath the controls and Berry grabbed a few wooden mugs from inside it, the cupboard itself was also bigger on the inside.

"So Doctor," she smirked, pouring herself a drink, "how's that whole time travel theory of yours going?"

The Doctor facehooved, "alright, one, it's going nowhere.  I have no idea how to get it to work," he threw his screwdriver at the controls,causing them to spark slightly.  The room shook violently, before calming down completely.  The Doctor glanced at a screen showing the current time and location.  It hadn't changed.  The Doctor sighed and returned his attention to Berry Punch.

"Two, what did I tell you about calling me 'Doctor?'" He said sternly, "it's pronounced 'The Doctor'."

"Whatever Doctor, Dr Hooves, Dr Whooves, The Doctor," Berry shrugged, gulping her mug of cider.  "How come Derpy gets to call you 'Doctor?'"

The Doctor frowned, "she's allowed," he replied.  "Don't tell me you came all this way just to patronize me."

"Actually no, I didn't," Berry said, throwing the empty mug behind her (much to The Doctor's disapproval).  "I came to you because I found a pony in the park."

"You found a pony in the park?" The Doctor replied, "you're gonna have to be more specific," he added, grabbing his screwdriver and hiding it in his tail.

"Well," Berry said, pouring herself another drink, "he's got some kind of amnes- *hiccup* -ia going on.  He like, spent the night in a tree or something and fell out of it this morning.  He can't remember his name or *hiccup* how to drink out of a bottle or cup.  I don't even think he knows where he is," Berry said, feeling the hiccups coming on.  "Must have gotten drunk and had a whale of time last night," she added sarcastically.

The Doctor rubbed his forehead, "have you seen this pony before?"

Berry shrugged, throwing her empty mug on top of her other one.  "Haven't seen anypony like him," she said, pouring herself yet another drink.

"Well, what about his name, did he have say, any hints on his cutie mark suggesting a possible name?"  The Doctor asked, glancing at his own cutie mark.

"Well, he had one of those things that you use to put things on that *hiccup* thing on his cutie mark and it had the word 'NOPE' on it, so I just called him Nope."

The Doctor stared into space for a while, "do you think maybe somepony put some kind of spell over him, causing him to forget everything?  Is there even a spell for that?  Can unicorns make somepony forget their memories?  Ha! Brilliant, if there actually is a spell for memory, I can study it and try and incorporate it into my screwdriver!"

For the past 420 years, The Doctor had been studying unicorn magic and had managed to get some of it into his screwdriver so that he could manipulate it as if he was a unicorn.  However the spells collected on his screwdriver were limited, and he didn't have complete control over them.

About 17 years ago, he tried using a spell from his screwdriver to improve an orphaned slightly blind grey filly's vision.  The result was giving her a permanent lazy eye.  Although the filly was slightly annoyed by this sudden occurrence, she was intrigued by The Doctor's magic screwdriver and followed him around for a few years, watching him study and trying to understand what he was doing.

Eventually the pony stumbled into The Doctor's cottage, where she was instantly amazed about it being bigger on the inside.  The Doctor allowed her to stay and be his research assistant for a few months.  However in the past four years she grew from an assistant to a close friend of The Doctor.  He even gave her the nickname, Derpy.  She loved the name, and started using it more than her birth name, Muffins.

"Whether he's been hexed or not doesn't exactly matter," Berry Punch said, tossing her mug aside once again, causing The Doctor to stare slightly annoyed at her.  "I came here to see if you could help him."

"How am I supposed to help a pony with amnesia?" The Doctor asked.

"You'll find a way," came a soft voice from behind him.

The Doctor turned around.  "Derpy! You're back!"

"Hey Doc," she said, running up to him and giving him a hug.  "Managed to sell all of my muffins so I came home early just in time to hear you two talking." She smiled at Berry, who smiled back at her.  "You're The Doctor, you're the greatest pony in all of time and space.  You've done countless amazing things in your life, you should be able to help a braindead pony."

The Doctor thought about this for a second.  "I guess you're right.  Shouldn't be too much of a hazzle."  He turned to Berry Punch, "well, lead the way to this pony!" He grabbed a multicoloured scarf of the side of a chair, "allons-y!"

Berry finished the last of her cider, threw the mug away and trotted out the door.

"You could just you the same mug..." Derpy whispered to herself, staring at the pile of empty cider mugs.

"Oi! Doctor, ya' comin'?" Berry shouted from outside.

"IT'S PRONOUNCED 'THE DOCTOR!'" The Doctor shouted back at her, trotting out the door with Derpy following close behind.