What's With You And Trees?

by I Like Pie

Rating: everyone
Tags: Tirek, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Random, Discord
Length: 952

Discord asks Tirek a weird question.

"So, you don't like trees very much, do you? Why is that the case?" Discord says. He drums his claws against the table.

"What? What are you talking about me and trees?" Tirek yells loudly as he raises his eyebrows and shakes his arms.

Published 2015-12-22 05:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2015-12-22 05:20:01 UTC

Just Answer The Question

Discord walks through the gloomy Tartarus with three fearful guards by his side. Discord looks about for the prisioner he's looking for. He has seen manticores, sneering ponies, changelings, and greedy diamond dog but he hasn't seen the special prisoner he is dying to ask a question of. "Aha! There he is! Great to see him again! It's about time. I was just losing patience." The prisoner he's looking for (and now sees) is Tirek. He stands in a teeny ting cage.

Discord and the guards walk up to it. Three new guards stand next to it with wads of plastic and bandanas protecting their mouthes in a weak attempt to make sure Tirek doesn't suck up their magic. Discord cheerfully waves at Tirek.

One guard unlocks it with a key, then two guards slowly open the cage's doors, and Discord soars on in. "Why hello, Tirek." Discord says. The doors bang shut behind them. He snaps a claw and a table and two chairs appear. He sits down.

Tirek looks at the chair with a look of disgust but after a moment he actually sits down. He rests both of his arms on the table.

"Well Tirek, how are you?" Discord snaps his claw again and a tea set appears. Each cup is filled to the brim with a warm liquid that is light brown.

"Well, let me see, I'm in solitary confinement, the food isn't the best, and I rarely ever get any visitors. Then again, the last part I said might actually be good." He lifts a cup to his red lips and takes a sip. He then coughs. Liquid soars in Discord direction. He ducks to avoid it. "Way to much sugar. Anyways, why are you here Discord? Are you helping me escape? You're probably not going to do that since you're so close to those pon-"

"So, you don't like trees much, do you? Why is that the case?" Discord says with a look of utter curiosity. He drums his claws against the desk.

"What, what are you talking about me and trees? There is no connection!" Tirek yells loudly as he raises his eyebrows and shakes his arms wildly.

"It's actually quite simple. You destroyed my friend's home that was a tree. The same friend went to an alternate future where you were destroying trees for kicks." A notepad and pen appears on the table right next to Discord.

Tirek laughs at Discord's face. "Did Pretty Pony Princess Celestia put you up to this? No, was it Twilight Snarkle? Wait! Wait! I know who it really was, it was the yellow one, Flutterdry I think, or the pink one, Pinkie Cry?"

Discord rolls his eyes. "You are not properly educated, are you?"

Tirek's eyes are even wider. "Wait. Wait. You aren't kidding me. So this is a philosophical trap. So, what in all of Equestria do I get if I answer the question correct? Is there a stupid punishment if I fail it?"

Discord facepalms and groans loudly.

"Well the first tree you say I blew up wasn't really a tree. Not technically. It was a tree house. I was actually targeting that wannabe Princess with the purple coat! As for the other event you mentioned, that wasn't really me. That was me in a alternate universe. I'm probably really different from that version of me."

Discord was writing down what he said. He lays down the pen with a 'hmm' sound. "Interesting. Interesting. The words of a guilty station. Um..I mean, centaur seem to be pretty interesting." The last sentence he says more to himself than Tirek.

"You make a horrible poet. So, do I now get a prize or our you just wasting my time!" He dramatically stares Discord down.

Discord rolls his eyes again and then he makes some blue cotton candy appears. "Here, you get this for your Celestia forsaken prize!" He tosses it and Tirek and he catches it.

He sniffs it cautiously and then starts eating it. "Thanks, I guess. So, who really put you up to this!?"

Discord smiles mysteriously and then he makes the notepad and pen disappear out of thin air. "Well, that Pretty Pony Princess Twilight you mentioned has been talking to me about being curious and the question just hit me on the head."

"Wait! Is that another phycological dilemma I need to solve? Are you trying to trick me? If I answer this question correct will I get more of that cotton candy? I actually kinda liked that cotton candy."

This time Discord laughs at Tirek's face. He makes more cotton candy appear and he gives to Tirek. "Thanks for your response, buh bye, as the fillies and foals say nowadays!" He waves a claw goodbye. He then teleports out of the cage.

He turns to the guard with a childish smile."I'm now ready to go!" Two guards nod and start walking her out.

Tirek watches them while he shakes his head subtlety. He is weird. Very weird and utterly strange. Then again, it is nice to get a visitor every once in awhile. I just wish he got me out of this sucky place. Anyways, why does he even work for those ponies? Do they promise him friendship, love, and cookies to just get him on their side, Tierk thinks with a nonchalant shrug. He chews on the edge of a piece of delicious cotton candy.

Discord turns around before he is out of earshot and Tierk's line of sight. He waves. "Tierk, thanks again for your response!" He then turns around and they continue walking. They walk so far away that he can not see Tirek anymore.