The Flim-Flam's Report

by JusSonic

Rating: everyone
Tags: Alternate Universe, Original Character, Trixie, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Flim and Flam, Slice of Life
Length: 3738

The con ponies give their report of what happened during the Siege of the Crystal Empire.

Set at the exact same time as "Griffon A Good Talking To" and "What Will Will Do". After the failed takeover of the Crystal Empire, the Flim Flam Brothers report to the rest of the Brotherhood. Needless to say, most of the Brotherhood will not be taking it well.

Published 2015-12-22 21:50:02 UTC
Last updated 2015-12-22 21:50:02 UTC

Chapter 1

The Flim-Flam’s Report

During the events from the Umbrum Event went off in the Crystal Empire, a pony named Radiant Hope had once gathered some who would help her in plans to bring back King Sombra & free the Umbrum. But as fate would have it after Radiant Hope gather those in an attempt to return King Sombra & deal with the Mane Six & their party, a truth was exploited that none knew about. Queen Chrysalis revealed to the members about what the Umbrum are really like, that the promises made would change if such things were freed. And declaring that the Changeling Queen doesn’t care what happens to her allies when looking for guidance to stop such a madness, many of them have fled the scene when the Umbrum threat was dealt with. Right now, those that played their part in aiding in stopping the heroes to help revive King Sombra & unleash the Umbrum, those members aside from Queen Chrysalis & her Changelings are as follow: Lightning Dust, Iron Will & the Flim-Flam Brothers.

Currently we’re viewing not one, but TWO subjects at this time, the known Flim & Flam, also known as the Flim-Flam Brothers. Sometime ago, these Salesmen/Con Artist have gone through much, most of the time it was against the Apple Family. First time was when they presented the Super Speedy Cider Squeeze 6000 that makes faster cider to compete with the Apples in who could make the most until the brothers risked ruining the apples by speeding up more power & disregarded the safety means of not-so-tasty looking apples. Second time around was when they were selling a product called the Flim Flam Miracle Curative Tonic to cure ailment & injury, even restore youth & among other outrageous claims, when it was a useless pitcher of apple juice & beet leaves. But Granny Smith believed the tonic helped her out, & Applejack didn’t have the heart to tell the truth from her granny living like she was young again, but AJ realized a bad example of her dishonesty was setting for others, forcing the brothers to hastily flee Ponyville before they were noticed. There were even conned moments that they con sheep’s wool from swindling Flax Seed & Wheat Grass before returning the goods to all the ponies by Princess Luna’s command. Another event started from the AppleCon 45 was from back when the brothers had a heated falling-out due to their fighting over a mare in Dodge Junction & it took Granny Smith who initially suspected the brother’s motives before helping them reconcile because to her, nothing is more important or valuable than family. But even with that, Flim & Flam suffered another setback due to Apple Family members getting in the way, before meeting with Radiant Hope in orchestrating an attack on the Crystal Empire using their Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 6000 as a Trojan horse to smuggle Changelings in. But even after a losing battle, when King Sombra return, victory was achieve, but when learning about the Umbrum & of what dangers may come, the brothers began to have second thoughts about their role in the invasion. So even though the Umbrum were later defeated, the brothers used their vehicle to make a hasty getaway from the Crystal Empire as they were taking a secret route that lead to caverns to take them to….Safe Haven, the secret base operations of a group unit they are a part of, the Brotherhood Of Injustice.

“Any sign of pursuers, brother?” Flim asked his brother if someone was tailing them.

“No! I believe we were too fast for any to notice.” Flam stated in seeing no one was coming after them.

“This is bad, we were promised things & instead….” Flim stated off in worry about how things turn out for them.

“We were schemed into helping nearly destroy Equestria.” Flam finished that sentence of what they almost DID do instead.

“And that isn’t very good for business.” Flim stated how such an action won’t be pleasant for their business work.

“No, I say it’s very BAD for business if there is no business.” Flam issued off to say that without business in Equestria, they be out of business.

“There’s the secret location to Safe Haven!” Flim pointed off in spotting where they need to go.

“Then once we make it through, no one will find us!” Flam exclaimed that they will be in safety once they are there.

Now the Flim-Flam Brothers enter through a secret illusion over the walls of an area as it blurs out a bit before revealing a secret structure within an emerald cavern location. This was known as Safe Haven, a place that was given to those that are members of the made Brotherhood Of Injustice that work as a sub unit, directly link to…..the Apocalypse Ponies. But for many times, they work on separate task when not taking commands from higher up.

“Ah, safe at last.” Flim sighs off to say this in being in a safe place.

“Back in Safe Haven!” Flam exclaimed to also agree with his brother.

“Flim, Flam?” Then coming up to approach the vehicle was a familiar little colt that Flim & Flam knew.

“Scamward!” Flim & Flam exclaimed off to say this with smiles as they step down.

“Brother!” Flim, Flam & Scamward responded to have a brotherly hug moment as Trixie also walked in during this little reunion moment.

“Where have you two been?” Trixie Lulamoon asked off to cut in from asking something that was on her mind.

“Well now Trixie, it’s a very long…” Flim pointed off to start off in mentioning this.

“And very unpleasant story!” Flam exclaimed to say this with a remorse tone in his voice.

“Why? What happened?” Scamward asked off in feeling something bad almost happened that his brothers know about it.

“Well you see little brother, we were in the neighborhood, asked by a client for a….little task she had for us.” Flim started off in recalling how things were going for them at first.

“Which turn into an invasion of the Crystal Empire, King Sombra’s return, & near end of releasing the Umbrum.” Flam pointed off the other stuff that also came with a few sets of danger.

“Wait a second, this sounds like something that the REST of the Brotherhood should hear.” Trixie exclaimed in stopping the discussion as it sounds like serious stuff that all of them need to hear once.

“Really?” The Flim-Flam Brothers asked off worried about having everyone know what they been through.

“Yes! The Diamond Dogs are practicing their weapon combat drill, Boris, Boxco & Dum Dum are going over their training with their Alicorn Forms when they transform. All I have to do is contact Gilda who’s still in Griffonstone.” Trixie said, preparing to do just that.

With that, Trixie begins to take off to go off & gather the others to discuss things of what the Flim-Flam Brothers encounter. And from the sounds of it, not a lot of it was happy news.

“So, was it really all that bad?” Scamward asked off about what his big brothers saw was all that bad.

“You have no idea…” Flim started off to say this with a sad face.

“How bad it was…” Flam pouted off to finish that sentence in sorrow.

The little brotherly moment has to quickly be put on hold as they quickly begin to get moving towards a spot in Safe Haven where a gathering for the members shall take place. Everything goes dark around now of what will happen when the story about the Crystal Empire Invasion the brothers were apart of had even happened.

Soon after all of the members of the Brotherhood of Injustice assembled, they got down to business of what has happened. After the explanation was told, many shared different view of things, mostly in how the Flim-Flam Brothers got dragged into something that nearly put them all endanger. And the one most upset was the leader of the group, Boris.

“You DOLTS!” Boris yelled off in sounding upset at this time.

“Eh…” Flim & Flam was left stump about being called by that from the leader of their group.

“I thought handling stupidity from these two were enough to keep me busy, but you two out did that!” Boris sighs to say this in looking at his two Enforcers in how Boxco & Dum Dum were not much for brains, but clearly they are smarter than the con brothers.

“Hugh?” Boxco & Dum Dum looked to the other, did Boris say that they are smarter than what the Flim-Flam Brothers did, well isn’t that something to feel like they are smarter.

“And once more, I thought you two, being our Mechanics, had more brains than to be taken into something that looks possible. That’s like throwing in gems to distract the Diamond Dogs.” Boris lectures off to tell Flim & Flam this stuff about how even Diamond Dogs could be fooled into doing something what these two ponies got ripped into.

“But Boris, we just told you!” Flim stated off in trying to butter things up with their leader.

“That’s right, we were fooled into this!” Flam nodded off in stating on their defense of the case.

“Then you should have told us first!” Boris snapped off in lecturing the two of what the two brothers should have done than go along with such a thing.

“Hate to admit it, but Boris is right about that.” Gilda shrug off to admit this about what Boris said about the brothers.

“Gilda?” Trixie raised an eyebrow in having heard the griffon agree to such things.

“Think about it, reviving King Sombra, everyone, at least a pony otherwise knows how dangerous he was a 1000 years ago.” Gilda pointed out how bad Evil King Sombra was long ago that he’s hard to get along with or figure out.

“Diamond Dogs heard tale of what happened to Crystal Empire.” Rover nods off to mention this as what the Diamond Dogs know about such things.

“Yes, lots of gem stones as far as wide!” Spot nods off in knowing how the Crystal Empire has lots of gems.

“But scary Umbrum ruin pretty gems.” Fido issued off in worrying how scary those things are when unleashed.

“Even these dogs know that the Umbrum were a threat. And once more, you nearly had us at a disadvantage when the Royal Sisters got turn to statues while the same fate almost happened to the last two princesses.” Boris scolds Flim & Flam in what they almost did that was a costly act of what would have happened to Equestria & the rest of them.

“Surely if there was a problem, you Boris, the Enforcers & even Trixie could handle it.” Flim stated to say this in trying to cover up the mistake with some positive thinking.

“My brother is right, you four did take that potion from Wilco to gain more power, right?” Flam stated off in remembering how those amount them got a lot of magic power.

“Clearly you two don’t remember it that well.” Trixie stated off to remember Flim & Flam of certain things from the past. “Wilco failed to mention about if our hearts were not as all good, we turn into something other than Alicorns. I was perfectly alright since I was never terrible & these two just follow orders without second guessing, but they at least have feelings & concerns.” She explained how she, Boxco & Dum Dum were the lucky ones to obtain the extra magic power to have their own Alicorn Transformation Forms.

“Yep! She’s right about not knowing if we done bad,” Dum Dum nods his head in agreement there.

“We’re purely dumbfounded of not knowing till afterwards!” Boxco stated off in knowing how they got by.

“But Boris was not so much happy, he ended up transforming with the powers of inferno to become a Red Devil Pony!” Trixie stated that from Boris’ case, he gain an Alicorn Form in becoming a Red Devil Pony.

“We get it Trixie, but at least we can use magic to change our appearance to keep our extra strength hidden.” Boris stated off in changing the subject away from that memory to focus on what’s happening now. “Still, even if we went off to fix the mess you caused, we might still not have been enough.” He stated in pointing how that the strongest members of the Brotherhood of Injustice would still not be enough to handle the Umbrum threat.

“Wait!” Then Scamward steps in to have something to say about this whole thing. “Please, I know my brothers didn’t meant to do any of this. And they said it was fixed, so…can’t we just forgive & move on? After all, doesn’t this group still need them?” The colt tried to be the voice of reason even though he was here because Flim & Flam invited their youngest brother to stay.

Many of the Brotherhood of Injustice members were thinking about this with some extra thought. Many of them were capable fighters & magic casting experts, but mechanical & technical stuff is mostly for the Flim-Flam Brothers since they know how to do with machinery & creating weapons; even to sell their works to those that are paying good money which the funding helps the unit too.

“Kid’s got a point.” Gilda pointed out in agreeing to what Scamward said.

“Yes, brothers are still needed to make many machines.” Rover nods off in agreement on the subject.

“Yep, they make good machines.” Fido nods off to say this in agreement too.

“And good weapons to use, too!” Spot nods off in also applying to the same subject.

“Yeah, Flim & Flam are our only best Mechanics of the group.” Boxco replied off in stating how the brothers are good at the tech stuff.

“Heck, without them, we be up a tub without a duck.” Dum Dum stated off in where they be without the Flim-Flam Brothers.

“That’s up a river without a paddle!” Boris yells at the two for not getting the right phase said right. “Ugh, very well, I will consider…lightening your punishment, on your little brother’s behalf.” He sighs in looking at Flim & Flam to be a bit easy on their punishment, for Scamward’s sake.

"Phew.” The Flim-Flam Brothers sigh with much relief to hear that.

“But that doesn’t mean your off the hook, for the next week, I want you to invent new ways to keep Safe Haven secure & more Machines Of War to help us in our career of survival.” Boris lectures off in wanting the brothers to work hard in developing a lot of things to be of use for them.

“Oh but of course!” Flim replied off in being certain of that task.

“Whatever you say.” Flam nods off that they will do that without delay.

“Good, now Gilda, according to the report, you met with the other member of who was apart of the Crystal Empire Invasion.” Boris nods off to say this while looking to Gilda about another matter to finish up with that involved the main topic of what the Flim-Flam Brothers went through.

“Yeah, Lightning Dust, gave her a Magic Gate Stone.” Gilda shrug off to simply state out the answer to the question.

“So that’s why you requested to be brought in, you didn’t have it & you can’t use magic.” Trixie stated to say in understanding the topic a bit better of what Gilda was in.

“Yeah, but even though she’s a bit rough around the edges & reckless, she’s like the rest of us…” Gilda simply stated this off that Lightning Dust is kinda like them too in ways.

“How so?” The Enforcers asked off in not knowing how another pony was like any of them.

“Being Unjust…we all gone through a lot to be here.” Gilda blankly stated to draw up the main point of the discussion.

Many members of the Brotherhood of Injustice recall that the first members were Trixie, Boris & his stooges before seeking out others that were given such unjustifiable acts from the heroes, aka the Mane Six. So ever since then, they serve to operate as a separate unit while also working with the Apocalypse Ponies on a few tasks. For the most, they bring in those that feel like their place in Equestria is in question, from being unable to get justice from where they were apart of matters from conning, scheming, underground activity, actions that put others in danger, etc. Many are not all villains, but some just like a place where at least they can feel like they belong.

“So, Lightning Dust will be perfect as our first out in the field unit, if she’s up for it. After all, had to help her out after being label a fugitive till the heat dies down.” Gilda smiled off to brag about what she did in helping a fast flier out, etc.

“How do you know she will do so?” Boris raised an eyebrow in wondering if Lightning Dust will be up to the task.

“She’s like me when I started out, she’ll be a great addition & she’s a fast flier, having more of those will also be good for our unit, right?” Gilda spoke out in stating how the more fast fliers they have in their group, the better they can be off in certain areas.

“Hum, you make a good point.” Boris hums a bit from taking what he heard to think this through. “Very well, I’ll agree to let her be a part of our unit, seeing she doesn’t have much choice being a fugitive.” Boris nods off that he will allow Lightning Dust to act as their out in the field unit for the Brotherhood of Injustice.

“Great, I’ll tell her she’s accepted, maybe next time, give her a tour.” Gilda smiled off in being a bit proud of having gotten the okay here.

“Oh, another member joining us?” Spot asked off in getting a bit excited by the news here.

“Goody, been forever since had more members!” Fido exclaimed in not knowing when they got more to the group.

“Now Brotherhood may have better chances in future with two fast fliers.” Rover showed a ‘two’ number on his fingers in counting their only living fliers other than the mechanical Steel Clan units.

“Alright, back to work with the lot of you.” Boris issued off to say this in cutting their emergency gathering down since it’s been resolved.

“Roger!” The Diamond Dog Trio saluted off to say this in hearing & obeying.

Now the group was beginning to go their own separate ways while some were slow while wanting to still chat among themselves.

“Well, at least things worked out alright in the end.” Trixie stated this off to the Enforcers of how everything worked out fine.

“Yeah, Flim & Flam will still be with us.” Boxco nods off in being happy the brothers will be around.

“Plus, we get a new buddy to boot too.” Dum Dum smiled off in stating another reason to be glad.

“Hmmm, I’ll have to let Princess Celestia know about this when next time I have a chance.” Trixie hums to herself quietly; she’ll have to secretly report this activity as a spy for Celestia about Flim & Flam, along with Lightning Dust.

“Come on, you gotta show me how to operate that secret project!” Scamward’s voice was heard as the three ponies see the salesmen ponies with their littlest brother.

“Sorry, that thing is still missing a vital power source.” Flim stated in protesting about how the secret project is missing a vital source of power to run.

“But it is a work you won’t believe until seen with your own eyes.” Flam also stated of that once the work is done, it will blow one’s mind away.

“And that’s the Flim-Flam Brothers guarantee claim.” The Flim-Flam Brothers issued off to say this while speaking in union.

Then the Flim-Flam Brothers began to go off in song now, as Scamward followed along with them with a smile. Trixie could only smile in seeing that at least Flim & Flam made it back safely, especially for Scamward’s worried sake, guess family is important in any place one is in. And with that, everything begins to go dark around now, as the situation with the Flim-Flam Brothers comes to a conclusion, until their next product they will either be selling by peaceful means…or the other means, guess we’ll have to wait & see what surprises the future may have in store….

The End

Author's Note

Cast list
Samuel Vincent: Flim
Scott McNeil: Flam
Josh Peck: Scamward
Crispin Freeman: Boris
Kathleen Barr: Trixie Lulamoon
Marÿke Hendrikse: Gilda the Griffon
Samuel Vincent: Flim
Scott McNeil: Flam, Rover
Garry Chalk: Fido
Lee Tockbar: Spot
James Arnold Taylor: Boxco
Richard Steven Horvitz: Dum-Dum

Author's note
This one plays out a little after Griffon A Good Talking To & also during What Will, Will Do?

And there we go, another story finished which ties in to new changes from Cutie Re-Mark Remake, enjoy...

Oh, speaking of which! The remake you all been waiting for is next!

The Cutie Re-Mark Remake: While Twilight gives a speech about cutie marks & how they affect everyone's lives & how destiny can lead them on their own path, an unexpected reencounter against Starlight Glimmer occurs in which may change the fate of Equestria by undoing a major course in history by time travel; by stopping the moment Twilight & the Mane Six ever were formed. The course of history is off, the unbalance change causes an alternate future of the present to come forth. And if that isn't the worse of it, the encounter of some 'old' & defeated foes the Mane Six overcame are back, ruling worlds they never conquered? Can Twilight fix the space time-continuum to make everything right, can she get history back on the right track?
Villains: Starlight Glimmer (before she becomes reformed) & many villains of the past & present…"

Of course, the fic can only be found on deviantART since the folks at fimfiction won't allow it.

Finally, the Season 5 finale remake is up! Read, review and suggest!