Harsh Beginings

Chapters

Getting to know the ponies
New Beginnings
Lifelong Stroy
Used Again
Last Resort
Untold Stories
Awake
Truth
Harsh Farewells

Getting to know the ponies

Well it’s been nearly a month since I arrived to Ponyville, haven’t done much since I don’t really know anyone, all I really do is go to work and come back home and read or sit around.
I will usually go walk around the woods just for fun and to admire all the fauna and just lay on the grass and admire the sky, being a Pegasus I would fly up there but I don’t really fly that much since there really anything to do but to go up there to either sleep on a cloud, whenever it’s about the weather or when I have to go visit my family in Clouds Dale, it’s pretty boring to not have anyone else to visit like friends. The closest I have to friends are the colts down at the bowling alley where I work but there not that much of friends then they are just colts to have a conversation with, they just be talking about every mare that passes thru they sight, I’m not like them.

“Hey Loaf come over here, QUICK!!”

“What is it Mr. Pinstripe?” I responded in a very irritated voice cause I could only guess he would make me polish the balls again.

“I need you to go take these drinks over to those mares over there at lane 6”

“Okay Mr.Pinstipe” thank goodness I thought, this is much easier than polishing balls

“And tell them that I sent them, a little gift on the house and when you come back you can go polish some balls”

“Sure thing Mr.P” damn it, I thought as I headed over to lane 6 to give this “conquering drinks” as I call them, Mr.P is always giving away drinks to mares he likes and thanks to these giveaways I have been hoofed in the face in a number of occasions

“Here you go a little gift on the house courtesy of Mr. Pinstripe” I said this hoping I wouldn’t get hoofed as I handed over the drinks to the cyan colored mare and her friends, but my fears became reality as she said

“Huh I don’t believe it, you’re trying to lay a move on me aren’t you?”

“Now, now Rainbow settle down this fella just wants to give us a drink, that’s all”

“Yeah Applejack is right settle down”

“Well let me give you a little gift” In that moment the rainbow colored mare let out a great hoof onto my face knocking me down instantly.

“Sorry for bothering you girls, enjoy your drinks” I said as I got up and left there sight view, and as always when this happens I see Mr.P and the other colts laughing at me as I headed over to the back room to polish the balls

“That was real harsh of you Dash, the poor fella was just doing his job” said Applejack as she saw Loaf’s boss and coworkers laugh at him as he went to the back room

“Yeah all he wanted was to give us the drinks and leave”

“Twilight is right; you should go and apologize to him”

“Well I guess I did overreact, I go after we finish this game”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Thankfully this little accident happened near the end of my shift so I wouldn’t have to be in the bowling alley all day with this black eye.
As I headed out at the end of my shift I heard a voice behind me

“Hey! Wait up!”
As I turned I around I saw the same pony that had hit me a few hours earlier

“Hi sorry for bothering you I didn’t know you would react like that, I was only doing my job”

“No it’s my fault, I was the one that overreacted, you see I just broke up with my colt friend and I’m a little sensitive.”

“Oh. I’m sorry, if I would’ve known I would have had approached more causally and with better words.. so what’s your name?”
She slowly raised her head from the ground and looked at me with a little anger in her eyes

“Are you trying to seduce me?” she replied in an angered tone

“No I just want to know cause I moved here from Clouds Dale about a month ago and I don’t have any friends yet, that’s all nothing more” I said in slight fear that she would hoof me again but I saw her anger go away

“If that’s true than the name is Rainbow Dash” she replied

“Well nice to meet you Rainbow Dash, it was nice talking to you but I see your friends are waiting for you so I be going then, see you around sometime, and by the way my name is Bread Loaf but call me Loaf.”

After saying that she just said goodbye and we both took our paths, me to my house and her back with her friends. Nothing more after that.
When I arrived at my house I was exhausted so I just laid down in my bed to sleep but I couldn’t stop thinking about her, she was the most beautiful pony I had ever seen and by judging of her looks I can tell she is also from Clouds Dale. She was the best thing that had happened to me since I got here even if she did hoof me, I didn’t care. I just needed to know more about her
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The next morning I headed to the library to check out some books since I had already read the ones I have at home. To my surprise the pony that attended the library was one of the mares who was with Rainbow Dash at the alley yesterday.

“Hello welcome-wait you’re the pony my friend hoofed yesterday at the bowling alley” said the purple pony as she closely looked at me

“Yup that’s me indeed but I’m okay and she apologized so it’s okay, plus she told me why she acted like that”

“So she told you she broke up with Blues?”

“Well she didn’t give me names but yeah that’s what she said, it’s okay at least I know somepony now”

“What do you mean?” She asked

“Well I moved here about a month ago from Clouds Dale and I don’t have any friends yet.”

“So you’re from Clouds Dale too huh? So is she and another one of my friends.”

“Really? Cool I knew I could recognize somepony from Clouds Dale when I see them.”

“Yeah that’s nice.. By the Way my name is Twilight Sparkle, nice to meet you.”

“Nice to me you, names Bread Loaf but every pony calls me Loaf.”

“Loaf huh? I guess that mean you’re a good baker?”

“Yes indeed I make some pretty good bread and other bakery goods.”

“That’s great, so why didn’t you get a job at a bakery?”

“Well that what I’m still looking for but I needed a job quickly when I got here so I went with the first thing I could find.”

“Know that you mention it I think they need an extra baker down at Sugercube Corner, one of my friends works there.”

“Really? That would be great, I don’t think I can stand one more day at the alley.”

“Alright then, I’ll tell her later and then I’ll let you know.”

“Thank you this means a lot to me.”

“No problem.”
After I checked out the book I wanted I headed over to the market to pick up a few things and to my luck Dash was there along with another yellow pony, I passed by and said hi and she recognized me right away.

“Hey Loaf what’s up? Feeling better?”

“Hi Rainbow nice to see you again, yeah I’m feeling better, but don’t worry I’m used to it, these things happen all the time to me.”

“Well that’s nice to know. By the way this is my one of my friends, Fluttershy.”

“Um...Nice to meet you...” said the shy pony

“Nice to met you Fluttershy my name is Bread Loaf but my friends can call me Loaf, by the way I met one of your other friends this morning at the library.”

“So you met Twilight, that’s good you met 2 of my friends in the last 24 hours.”

“And I think I’ll meet another one later today at Sugercube Corner.”

“Really you’re going to meet Pinkie Pie, can we know why?”

“Well Twilight said they needed a new baker so I’m going to see if I get the job.”

“Well good luck to you it seems you managed to make friends real fast since yesterday when we talked.”

“Yeah, and thanks to you Dash.”

“Well in that case you’re welcome”

“Well I guess I have to get going or I’ll be late for work, I’ll see you girls later.”

“Well see you later Loaf.”

“We should hang out some more, well see you Dash, goodbye Fluttershy and pleased to meet you.”
As they saw Loaf take off, Fluttershy noticed something in Rainbow Dash, she was looking at him in a way as she liked him

“Um… Dash are you okay?”

“Huh? What? I mean yeah I’m okay why do you ask?”

“Because you looked at him like when you first saw Blues.”

“Fluttershy are you saying I’m falling in love with Loaf?” asked Rainbow Dash in and offended tone trying to hide what she was feeling in that moment which she finally convinced herself

“Well actually yes, it’s not that big of a deal I mean he is good looking, and I was just wondering.”

“Don’t worry yourself Fluttershy its just mixed up feelings nothing big.”

“Well if you say so…” replied Fluttershy knowing that those weren’t hard feelings or mixed up but love.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

All day I was waiting for Twilight to barge in and tell me that I got the job, I didn’t like the alley at all, to many troubles especially when I have to deliver “conquering drinks”, I absolutely hate that.
Finally Twilight came to me and told me that I had to tomorrow to have a little interview/test to see if I’m good or not.

“Well Loaf that’s really all you have to do.”

“Sounds easy but yet again a lot of stuff does and it turns out the other way.”

“I know what you mean Loaf, by the way there’s somepony I want you to meet, her name is Rarity.”
AS she said this, she so happened to walk in, she was a unicorn like Twilight but I could tell she was one of those “classy” ponies.

“Eck, this place looks so filthy.” She said as she headed towards us.

“Why hello there, what’s your name?” she said quite excited and intrigued at the same time.

“Hello, my name is Bread Loaf but friends can call me Loaf.”

“Well nice to meet you Loaf, The name is Rarity and I run the Carousel Boutique which if you need anything that’s where you can find me.” She sounded ever so excited like if she was trying to impress me or something.

“Well thanks for your help Twilight and again a pleasure to meet you Rarity, I guess I see you girls tomorrow.”

“No problem Loaf, come on Rarity we got to go help Applejack remember.”

“Well of course I remember, see you later Loaf” Replied Rarity as they both left the alley.
I can only hope I get the job. Then I could hang out more around Dash since I be with one of her friends most of the time. I wonder if she feels anything for me like I do for her?
As I left the alley at the end of my shift I found the surprise that Rainbow Dash was outside the alley, I don’t know if she was waiting for or what but her quick response soon confirmed that.

“Hey Dash, what’cha doing here?” I asked

“Well I sort of wanted to…” she responded as she turned her hea to the ground

“Yes? Ask me something?” I asked hoping it wouldn’t be something bad.

“Quick think Dash, how are you going to ask him!” she thought as she lifted her head to look over to Loaf

“Is there something wrong?” asked Loaf a little worried

“Um…um…Is there anypony in particular that you like out of me or my friends?”

“Wow…” I replied

“Is she really asking me this? What do I say? Do I tell her what I feel for her? And if she doesn’t feel the same? Yet again why would she ask if she didn’t feel something for me?” I thought as I analyzed what she had just asked

“Well that’s a hard one.” I replied without thinking it fully

“Oh…” She said almost whispering

“What?! No don’t take that way it’s not what I meant.”

“Oh darn it. I thought I ruined it, my chance to tell her, but how could I tell her I love her if I’ve only known her for one day?”

“No…Its okay I understand if you like one of my friends, there’s no problem, it’s me, I just know it…” She said shedding down a tear.

“Well if you really want to know…” I said, I know I had to say it now, cause otherwise I probably wouldn’t get a chance again.

“I love…I love… you.” I said and quickly looked towards her direction.

“You…you mean it?” she asked as she whipped tears off her face.

“Yes, I mean it, I love you even if we’ve only known each other for a day, I know there’s never going to be another like you.” I had completely declared my love for her in those words and I was afraid if she liked me too, at that point it was hard to tell.
She stayed silent for a few moments…
And finally she said…

“I love you too”
I exploded in joy when she pronounced those words, I felt magic in my heart, the one pony I had ever loved in a really long time feels the same for me.

“So…now what?” she asked

“How about you come over to my house and I fix us up a good meal?”

“That sounds great, I could so go for something to eat right now…”

“What’s wrong? Do you or not like me?” I had to ask this cause I wanted to be sure that she felt the same for me and not just because of what I just said.

“Yes I do, it’s just that…”

“Come on tell me, I won’t say anything I promise.”

“I know that you met my friend Rarity today…”

“And?” I asked thinking that she probably thought that I would like her instead.

“She is more beautiful than me, so I was thinking you would prefer her instead of me, she always gets the colt she wants…”

“Well, no I love you and only you, you want to know why?”

“Why?”

“Because of all the times I’ve been hoofed in there, you are the only one that has ever apologized, that one that actually listened to my side of the story and not just because of what happened.”

“Do you really mean it? Is that true?”

“If it wasn’t why would I say that and to you especially?”

“I guess you’re right…”

“Come on lets go, it’s starting to get dark.”
I don’t know what went thru her mind, but the moment I touched her hoof she just launched at me and gave me a hug and said

“I know you’re telling the truth…”
I couldn’t believe this moment, it was truly magical and nothing could ruin this newly found happiness. I don’t know how long it has been since I was this truly happy.

As they both headed back to Loaf’s house, they kept silence, they didn’t know what to say and in fear that the other would say something, it seemed like a rough start for what each could only expect to be a good relationship.

“It’s been so long...” I accidently thought out loud.

“Huh?” I just heard Dash ask but I wasn’t willing to hide it I knew I had to start this relationship good and not mess it up like I have done in my past.

“I mean… it’s been a long time since I’ve had a marefriend… I mean that’s what we are right”

“Well yeah we are … that’s if you want us to be”

“Well yes that’s what I want…”

“Yes I want to get to know you better Loaf, before any of this gets any further, we’re going to have to confess to each other EVERY detail, no matter how bad…”

With that we ended the conversation until we got to my house, she sat in the couch and watched TV while I was in the kitchen mixing up dinner, nothing to fancy but just right for the occasion
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

“So… I met all your friends so far haven’t I?” me obviously looking for some conversation to start

“Well tomorrow after you visit Sugercube Corner you will have” as she took her first bite of her dinner

“Oh. Well that’s nice, or your friends look like nice ponies.” As I gazed her beautiful eyes, I was captivated by them also her colorful mane, she just looked so pretty I can’t see why his last coltfriend would dump her.

“So… about earlier…” She said as she took a slip from her glass

“What do you mean?”

“When we were on our way here you said it’s been a long time since you had a marefriend, can I know why that reason was?” she turned her head towards me and had an expression that she really wanted to know why.

“Well it was when I was in Canterlot, that’s where I studied Gastronomic there and I had a crush for one of the fillies in my class, so one day I asked her out and then we started dating but after a few months of dating I found out she had slept with another colt… I was so devastated when I found out, I didn’t come out of my room in weeks, I almost didn’t graduate, I was so sad because I would never have cheated in here or any other filly, the worst part is…” I stopped after that, I didn’t know if I wanted to say that other part about me and my sexual life.

“And…?” she asked knowing that there was more to it and that it didn’t end there.

“And…well… I don’t want to say really, not that it’s something bad but I just don’t know if to say it or not.” I couldn’t possibly say it, I don’t know maybe she’ll laugh at me or something, that will just have to wait till we get further in this relationship.

“It’s okay, if you don’t want to say there’s no problem…”
Ahh crap, now she thinks I’m hiding something bad from her, it’s not that I don’t plan on telling her it’s just that I’ve been so isolated for so long that I grew very shy and don’t know when to speak up, it kills me not being able to talk about my life to the pony I love.
After we finished dinner, we laid on the couch and watched TV for a bit, after a while a storm started out of nowhere not even she knew they had a storm planed.

“I think I should head home before the storm gets worst.” She said as she got up from the couch

“Buts its real late, if you want… you’re welcome to stay here…I mean if that’s okay with you, you can sleep in my room and I’ll sleep here in the couch.”

“Well…sure why not, it can’t be that bad plus my wings would get to wet to fly, so yeah I’ll stay if that’s okay with you.”

“Yes.” I thought as I got up from the couch to show her to my room.

“Well here we are, my room. There’s the bed in case you want to sleep already.”

“It looks comfy, but why such a big bed?” she pointed out as she climbed in.

“Well I’m not sure I bought this back in Cloudsdale, I guess I liked the size.” I replied with a smile as I headed to the stairs to go back down.

“Um…Loaf?”

“Yeah, do you need more blankets or another pillow.” I turned around to see her sitting on the bed

“Well no... Um…” she replied as she faced the ground

“What is it?”

“Can you sleep next to me?” she asked and I immediately started sweating and thinking.

“Sorry did I ask for to much.” She said putting a frown on her face

“No. I… okay, if that’s what you want I do it.”
I slowly approached the other side of the bed and got in beside her, she then laid her head on my chest and feel fast asleep. She looked so beautiful, I had never seen such a pretty filly like her, I looked at her for a few more minutes and then fell fast asleep, hopefully to dream about her.

New Beginnings

When I woke up in the morning I found out Rainbow Dash had already woken up, cause well, she left a note,

Loaf I had an errand to run in Cloudsdale, see later today

~ Rainbow Dash
I didn’t mind, since I didn’t have my interview until 3’o clock I decided to go walk around town square, maybe buy some stuff I need.
* * * * * * * * * *
I couldn’t stop thinking about her, I knew she moved here to Ponyville, but, was I really willing to look for her? What if she forgot about me? I mean she is 2 years older than me, know that I think about it, maybe she’ll know where he lives, we were always the best friends since we were little. But since collage we haven’t seen each other, we did kind of take our own roads but to at least see a familiar face wouldn’t do me any harm, I didn’t know if to ask the other ponies for her but I didn’t also know if she still likes being called by her nickname anymore, but my mind was set, I would ask everypony if they knew her by asking them if any of the 2 names rang a bell.

“Um… excuse me.” I decided to start by asking to mares that were at a fruit stand.

“Yes, what can we help you with? Responded one of them

“Yes, um do any of you know a pony named Ditzy?”

“Ditzy huh? It rings a bell but I can’t quite remember.” Responded the other pony

“Well she might also be known as Derpy,”

“OH! Derpy, yeah she’s our friends, yeah we hang out a lot but we don’t know where she can be, but I know somepony who can know.”

“Really? That would be great if you could tell me who he is and where I can find him.” I felt so excited; maybe this pony can also know something about Whooves.

“Yeah he’s a doctor at the clinic, his name is Whooves, well Dr.Whooves, he is a really long time friend of his.”
“Thanks, I’ll go see him right away.” I responded as I trotted away quickly to the clinic to talk to him, I couldn’t believe he also moved here, I mean I know she did since she graduated first and told us she was coming here but I thought Whooves had stayed in Canterlot, I was so excited, know I had some friends to talk to again beside my new ones I made thanks to Dash.
* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Loaf slowly walked up to the nurse who was attending the patients at the front desk.
“Hello Sir what can we help you with?” asked the nurse from behind the counter.

“Yeah, hello, um... I’m wondering if Dr.Whooves was here?” I shyly asked hoping she I wouldn’t have mistaken the clinic.

“Well he is currently attending a patient, if you don’t mind waiting, he is about to take his launch break.”

“Um… yeah I guess I’ll wait for him than.”

“Very well then. If you would like to take a seat while you wait for him.”

“Sure, no problem.” I said as I took a seat next to a mare and her son.

“Mommy is the shot going to hurt?” asked the young filly as her turned over to see his mom who was reading a magazine

“Well you’ve had some before and didn’t hurt you, so now that you’re a big boy im pretty sure it won’t.” Replied the mother as she smiled to the filly who had a terrified expression on his face
I usually never get sick or anything, most likely because of the fact that I don’t like doctors, clinics or hospitals; I’ve always been terrified of them, the feel of sadness and the amounts of blood that I imagine for some reason, this fear is sort of what made me more immune to a lot of stuff, I managed to develop some pretty good antibodies to stay as far away from all this places as possible. Finally the little pony and his mother went in to the doctor’s office; I picked up the magazine she was reading since I noticed an interesting article about dating in the cover I imagined this would help me out a bit since beside Rainbow, I hadn’t had a marefriend since middle school and now that I think about it, that’s when I started to isolate myself.
After a few minutes the mare and her son left the doctor’s office.

“Okay Mrs.Roseluck just make sure he keeps taking his medicine and everything should be fine” said the doctor as he closed the office door behind him

“Thank you doctor.” Said the lady as she trotted out the clinic

“Loaf? Is that you?” Asked Whooves as he looked at me from the other side of the waiting room, he sort of had an accent which I had gained too over the years of hearing him talking.

“Yes Whooves, it’s me mate I’m living here in Ponyville” I replied as I stood up to go hug him, we always did everything together we were like the 3 musketeer, but after all of us graduated we fell apart, since Ditzy was the oldest she was the first to abandon us.
“Um I’m sort of going on my launch break, do you want to tag along?” he asked as he took of his coat to not get it dirty. I hadn’t had breakfast yet so I accepted and we both trotted out the clinic to go to a restaurant, he would be the one to choose since I didn’t know any, finally we settled for one that was close to the clinic and Sugercube Corner
* * * * * * * * * *
“So…What made you move here?” He asked me as he took a sip from his coffee

“Main reason being that I needed a new start, but there are a lot other reasons why I needed to leave Canterlot…” I answered as I looked away to see all the ponies

“Is it because of him?” He asked making me turn around at him as if he said it to get my attention; he just made me remember a lot of bad memories

“Yes” I replied quietly as I looked down to the table shedding a tear.

“So… How has your family been?” he asked me realizing I was about to break into tears

“Fine I guess… haven’t seen them in years, mainly due to the fact that I don’t like to fly anymore and my sister, haven’t heard from her in a while…” I didn’t really feel like talking about any of that, it just made me sad to think about them, after what had happened.

“So is your sister still in the Wonderbolts? Why don’t you go visit her? You can’t just give up flying your whole life, you’re a Pegasus you’re going to have to fly again one day!” he knew I didn’t really talk to my parents anymore cause they felt disappointed so he only asked me about Spitfire.

“I can send her a letter, I don’t really have a good reason to fly, just to see how she’s doing doesn’t really count as one.” I hated having to think about flying, I haven’t done it in years, why start now?
“It’s not the same, one day you’re going to have to go to Cloudsdale to visit her or for any other business that you might have up there.”

“I stopped having reasons to fly or go to Cloudsdale 9 years ago, that’s the reason why I stayed in Canterlot to study instead of moving with my family back to Cloudsdale” I said with a slightly angry tone, he couldn’t get it thru his head that I didn’t want to fly or go back ever no exceptions.

“Fine, well have you met anypony else? Have you even visited Ditzy?” He couldn’t stop asking but I don’t blame him, 5 years without knowing anything about me, they wanted to make sure I hadn’t killed myself.

“There is a some ponies I met a few days ago, one of them is my marefriend already and about Ditzy-“ I didn’t finish talking before being abrupt by Whooves.
“Wait! You have a marefriend?” I didn’t know why he was so shocked by the news

“Yeah, why so shocked?”

“Why? Because of what happened 14 years ago that’s why, I don’t want you to fall into a great depression again, we wouldn’t stand seeing you in that state again.”

“Whooves, that was a long time ago, I was careless and foolish, I didn’t know what to do, now things are different.”

“But how many marefriends have you had since that happened.”

“Not counting what almost happened in collage if that was even considered a relationship, 1 not counting Rainbow Dash.”
“WAIT! You’re going out with Rainbow Dash?!” he was so shocked and I didn’t know why

“Yeah what’s so bad about that?”

“Do you not know? She is one of the ponies who saved Equestria twice in the last few years.”

“So you’re saying she famous?” I was dumbfounded I didn’t know anything about recent Equestria history

“Yeah, she hasn’t told you?”

“Well we started going out yesterday night, well anyways I’ll ask her later the reason I needed to see you, beside from catching up to everything, I need to know where Ditzy lives I kinda need to be somewhere right now” I need him to tell me, it was almost time for my interview at Sugercube Corner.

“Well she lives near the Carousel Boutique, house number 1117.” He answered quickly since he too had to get back to the clinic.

“Okay thanks, I’ll go visit you again another day.”

“Okay, I’ll be expecting you, and please do me a favor, talk to your sister, at least get her to come visit you.”

“Sure will, don’t worry.” I quickly took of to get to Sugercube Corner for my interview
* * * * * * * * * * * * * *
Loaf walked into Sugercube Corner slowly inspecting the area as he walked up to the counter.

“Hello?” I asked to see if anybody was there, I got no respond so I decided to ask out for Pinkie Pie, who was going to interview me, at least that’s what Twilight told me, I couldn’t quite remember.
“HELLO? PINKIE PIE?” I heard some noise come from what I assumed to be the kitchen so I decided to go see if she was in there.

“Pinkie Pie?” I slowly walked up to a table from which behind it could be seen a pink and puffy tail.

“Um… excuse me?”

“Ahh” screamed Pinkie Pie who was picking up some flour she had dropped on the floor

“Sorry!! Didn’t mean to scare you!!”

“Wait, are you? Yeah its you!!!” I started saying as she jump in front of me

“You must be Loaf, Dash told me you were coming!!”

“But I thought Twilight was supposed to come talk to you?” I was sort of lost when she said Twilight wasn’t the one that had told her about the job

“She did but Rainbow stopped by in the morning to make sure that I knew that you knew you were coming!” she seem to speak real fast but I could still understand her
“So you ready to get started?”

“Um… yeah just tell me what I have to do and I’ll do it” I was hoping it would be something easy but not too much, I needed this job so badly

“We’ll all you have to do is bake one of this 3 recipes and something else, whatever you want!” she then laid out 3 pieces of paper, I decided to go with the chocolate and vanilla cake and for the other dessert I would make some chocolate volcanoes, my specialty and something my sister really liked. She started telling me how she got her cutie mark and stuff, one would never guess her family owns a rock farm yet again that would explain why she’s always smiling, I imagine it would so dull that one simple smile would be enough to cheer somepony up, I also stopped every once in a while to make some questions but none of them of great interest, just good enough to the conversation going, she also kept talking about her friends which thankfully gave me some more info on them, especially about Rainbow Dash. Finally after about 3 hours I had everything done and ready for her to taste.

“So? How is it?” I asked hoping I hadn’t messed up neither of the recipes

“MM… this is good!” she said as she devoured all the cake and chocolate volcanoes.

“So…. Please tell me what you think.” I was eager to know the answer

“I think… You’re going to do well here! Congratulations Loaf! You got the job!” she said as she clapped to me

“Are you serious? Thank you so much Pinkie!” I rushed over to her and gave her a big hug, now I had truly started over, no more getting hoofed in the face in that darn bowling alley.

“See you tomorrow at 8 in the morning Loaf!” shouted Pinkie as I rushed home to wait for Dash to arrive
* * *
When I got home I really had nothing to do but wait for Dash so I decided to watch TV, after surfing all the channels I decided to watch the Ponyville news channel, after a few minutes I remembered what Whooves had told me about my sister and that’s when all the memories started coming back to me, not only about how I decided to stop flying but the many reason of why I took all decision to stop flying and going back to Cloudsdale, I realized I had isolated myself many years but that didn’t keep me from committing mistakes. I had just realized that I couldn’t live with this guilt any longer, If I truly wanted to start over again, I would have to confess all my errors and my life story to somepony, and that pony had to be Dash, she needs to know everything about me before we go any further.
* * * * * * * * * * *
“Loaf! I’m back from Cloudsdale!” Shouted Dash as she knocked on the door

“Come in!”

“Sorry I didn’t tell you personally but it was really urgent and I knew you would understand” she explained sounding kind of worried I wouldn’t believe her

“No problem, I knew you come back it’s just that…” I could tell this wasn’t going to be easy already

“Is there something wrong Loaf, did you get the job?” she asked with a more concerned tone in her voice

“Yeah I got the job, it’s just that… We need to talk about some stuff”

Lifelong Stroy

“What’s wrong? Please tell me” I noticed now that she was acting way out of herself, she was not how Pinkie had described her, I could tell she really cared and didn’t want to get hurt or hurt somepony. This was going to be difficult to explain.

“First of I need to know if you have told anypony that I’m your coltfriend” I needed to know that way nopony might need to be told later otherwise

“Well… no not really…” I could sense the sorrow in her voice

“For the next few moments that i tell you my story and explain everything, we are going to be only friends and nothing more, at the end you judge were we stand and we’ll need to come to an arrangement.”

“But why, do you not like me or something.” She shed a tear as she said that.

“I do like you it’s just that I feel we rushed to quickly, we have no clue of each other’s life or what there like, we need to hear out each other, but first I’ll be the one to talk, I need to get this load of me once and for all, I been carrying the weight for the last 14 years and I need to tell somepony who doesn’t already know and if I truly want my new beginning I need to let it out and I need to listen to every single word, do you promise me that?” it took her some time to analyze the situation but finally she nodded and that’s when I started again.

“I was in middle school when I had my first marefriend, she asked me out and since I was young I didn’t really know what to say so I just simply said yes, I was 13 at that point, I didn’t really know what to do since the whole experience was new to me, after 1 month or so of “Dating” she decided to break up with me, sadly she did it during the spring dance, I was devastated, everypony had a date except me, even my friends had dates and even she ended up with another pony moments after she dumped me. I stayed the whole night, foolish choice, but well, once I got home I rushed to my room, I was so mixed up with emotions I just didn’t know how to react, she was my first love and I did truly love her, the only defect was that I didn’t know how to act as a coltfriend, I didn’t eat for the next few weeks, the most I ate during that time was lettuce, it didn’t help much when one of my teachers became “concerned” and sent me to the school psychologist, which only made me feel like I had something really wrong when I knew o could easily pull myself together, the thought otherwise, it didn’t help either that they heard a rumor about me wanting to kill myself, that’s when I found out the only way out was to start isolating myself, I didn’t want them to hurt me anymore, at least mentally, thankfully I was only bullied verbally and mentally, the only thing that drove me to continue and finish middle school was the thought of high school and how that would be a new start.” I took a pause to see if Dash had any opinions
“So that’s it? That was a long time ago, now you have your new start, you can easily forget all that!” she said it as it all ended there and hoping I wouldn’t leave her

“I wish that where all ended, but it’s not the end just yet, when I graduated from middle school my dad was transferred to Canterlot from his work in Cloudsdale, I was 15 when we moved there, my sister who was 18 stayed in Cloudsdale due to her university, my little brother-“ I made a rapid pause as I inhaled, talking about my brother was never easy. “My brother was 2 when we moved to Canterlot, Since my friend’s dads also worked at the same place as my dad they all were transferred together, we all went to same high school, except my friend Ditzy was the first to graduate from high school she left me and my other friend in high school alone for 2 years, thankfully everything went good in there, well at least better than in middle school, then one day after I had barely graduated from high school, my parents went out for the weekend and left my little brother with me…” I had to stop, I was about to break into tears but I managed to pull myself together and talk again. “My parents left us money to buy food and well I asked my little brother if he wanted to come with me… I should have just left him home…When we arrived at the plaza I told him to stay in front of me the whole time so I wouldn’t lose him…But that didn’t work… I got distracted at a stand, I remember he said he wanted ice cream but I told him we had to eat first, that was the last thing I heard from him…When I was done buying the stuff at the stand I turned around to tell him something, but he wasn’t there, I became concerned when he didn’t answer, I started asking everypony if they had seen him, but nobody did. I had lost somepony I cared for…It was all my fault… I should have made him stay home… I spend the rest of the weekend looking for him, I didn’t sleep either so I was really tired when I stopped looking, finally I had to live the hardest moment in my life, I had to tell my parents, they were as devastated as I was, one week later they decided to move back to Cloudsdale, I was filled with grief, and I couldn’t believe what had happened… that’s when I decided I wouldn’t ever go back to Cloudsdale and I would never fly again..” I took a quick breath and continued. “Finally, The reason why I don’t want to rush all this relationship. When I was in middle school, after I had broken up, another mare came along and asked me out, I was happy cause I didn’t have to isolate myself anymore, but I don’t know why me, but I soon found out why, turns out she used me to get her old coltfriend jealous, it worked, the guy beat me up so hard I was knocked out hard, apparently word got out that I was “good” for the kind of stuff and this same situation happened 3 more time, after that last one I decided I was going back to isolating myself, I had been hurt so much, all I ever had desired was some physical contact, a hug would have been good enough for me, but, it never happened and that’s why I’m so shy and so easily depressed, sometime I’ll get so lost in flashbacks I won’t even realize what I’m doing, and that’s why I feel we need more time to get to know each other better Dash, I just want to be friends for now, nothing more…” I had let all that out, after many years I had opened up to somepony new, it felt good but I didn’t know how she would respond. After some time she spoke.

“If that’s what you want then okay… I won’t pressure you.” She didn’t look at me as she got up from the couch and slowly walked to the door.

“Will I see you tomorrow?” I asked, I needed somepony to hang out with I didn’t want to be alone.

“Sure no problem.” I noticed a strange smile, as she were up to something but I let it be and waved her goodbye as she galloped away from my house.
After that I went to sleep to think about everything I told her and tried to analyze her smile, something about it just seemed strange, I knew she was planning something, but what could it be? Good or bad?
After much thought I fell asleep, I had slept well for the first time in years as if I had taken a lot of weight of my chest.

Used Again

My alarm went off in the morning meaning I finally had my chance to start over, I felt extremely happy today, as if everything was going to be better now. After I finished getting ready I trotted off to Sugercube Corner,

“I haven’t seen Ditzy yet, I really should go visit her, she’ll be happy to see me again, well I sure will be happy to se her”

As I approached Sugercube Corner I saw that the door was closed, which is weird cause it should be open by now, Pinkie told me she opens at 9 am and its already 9:15. I hope I’m still on time.
“Hello?” I asked as I slowly opened the door, strangely the lights were off, I wondered if Pinkie decided to open up a little late

“SURPRISE!” shouted a bunch of ponies as the turned on the lights and came out of nowhere.

“Oh! What’s all this?!” I was surprised indeed but I didn’t know if it was meant for me, maybe I had walked in somepony else’s party by accident

“It’s a welcome party silly, do you like it, I figure I throw you a party since you’re new and stuff, and I imagined you didn’t know anypony so I invited everypony I could so you could have as many friends as me!” said Pinkie as she hopped over to me from her hiding spot.

“Wow, Thanks Pinkie this is truly a very good surprise, I like the whole décor, but don’t we need to bake some stuff?” I didn’t know what to respond or what to say, I was confronted with my worst nightmare, I had to socialize with ponies, I figured I get to the kitchen and bake whatever was needed as long as I was by myself.

“Don’t worry about that we have enough goodies here for the whole day, just enjoy you’re party Loaf.” She said as she hopped over to a group of ponies. I figure I would just stand near the door, I figured that if I was going to be making new “friends” I might as well greet them at the door and get it over with,

“Hi, nice to meet you my name is Lyra and this is my friend Bon-Bon” I blue pony came up to me followed by a sort of low toned yellow pony.

“Nice to meet you girls, the name is Loaf.” I really didn’t care about meeting anypony but I had to do it, well, do it for Pinkie she did after all organize all this just for me, it’s the nicest thing anypony has done for me in years, after a while I decided to go get something to drink.
* * * *
“Um remind me what we’re doing here” said a blue pony as they walked in to Sugercube Corner

“I told you Soarin, were here to visit my brother.” Said I yellow pony as she looked around for Loaf

“Well why don’t you ask some pony where he is?” Asked Soarin as he saw all the goodies and all the mares.

“No, I want to give him the surprise.”

“Mhmm, well then… go look. For him” said Soarin as he shoved pie in his mouth

“Fine you stay here and do whatever it is that you do when I leave you alone.” Said Spitfire as she started to walk around.

“Well hello ladies, wanna go for a ride on the Soarin airlines.” Said Soarin as he tried to lay a move on a group of ponies that were standing near the food.

“Not even in your dreams” said one of the mares as the rest laughed and walked away

“Oh man, what’s wrong with these ponies, don’t they know who I am; oh wait…IM NOT WEARING MY SUIT!” Shouted Soarin as he grabbed to more pieces of pie.
* * * *
“Where could Loaf be?” asked Rainbow Dash as she entered Sugercube Corner with Fluttershy

“Maybe he is making new friends, or just you know hanging out, but I mean I don’t know for sure.” Responded Fluttershy as they looked for a place to sit down.

“I need to talk to him, HEY! Pinkie come over here.” Shouted Rainbow as Pinkie jumped towards the table.

“Hi girls how are you? Are you okay cause I’m okay, nice party huh,-” she was interrupted by Rainbow.

“Pinkie quite for a second, I need to know where Loaf is.”

“Oh he was speaking to Lyra and Bon-Bon earlier but I don’t know where he went after that.”

“Oh okay I’ll talk to him later then” responded Dash as she took a sip out of her drink.
“Okie dokie lokie then see you girls later!”

“Um I’m gonna go get something to eat, you want anything Dash?” asked Fluttershy as she got up from the table.

“Nah I’m fine thanks.”

“Okay I’ll be right back then” Fluttershy slowly trotted her way to where the food was at.

Rainbow Dash sighed as she thought about last night, “I don’t know if I should go on with this, I mean he has been used for this stuff before in his life but he opened up to me… how could I possibly do this to him? I love Blues but I don’t want to hurt Loaf, this is so hard plus he said so himself, he only wanted us to be friends... For now.”

“Hey Dash how you doing?” asked a blue colt

“What the hay? What are you doing here Blues, I mean not there’s nothing wrong with that. He he…” Dash blushed as he sat down next to her, she needed to act fast and need to take a decision.

“So what is a lovely mare like you doing here.” He too wanted her back and tried to lay as many pick-up lines as he could

“Well it’s my friend’s Loaf welcome to Ponyville party, and well I had to come.” I noticed I had blushed when I turned over to look at him.

“You now that I can’t stay away from one of Pinkie’s party, so you want to get something to drink.” He smiled at her, he wasn’t leaving until he had her back.

“Sure I would love to.” She smiled back at him as they both got up.
* * * *
“Hey! Loaf!” called Spitfire as she saw him across the room trying to get his attention

“Huh, Wait…Spitfire?!” said Loaf in a low tone. Could it be my sister?
She quickly galloped towards him, it had been 2 years since they last spoke, he couldn’t believe she actually had some free time with that whole Wonderbolts thing.

“Loaf it’s me Spitfire I got your letter.” She said as she finally got to where he was standing

“Oh my, it’s been a long time sis, I forgot what color your mane was.” I laughed as I said this last comment, I then approached to hug her, I was to see a familiar face literally.

“How did you manage to find time to come, I mean you must have a tight schedule?” I asked making some conversation.

“Well we managed to get a free day and well I wanted to come visit you.”

“Wait what do you mean we.” I asked surprised to the fact that she brought company

“Yeah, Soarin tagged along, but knowing him he is probably trying to hit on some mares.” She laughed I guess she knows how much luck he gets at that.

“But well enough about me, tell me have you met anypony, did you finally get pass your dating problem.” She knew my past because I always trusted her with my secrets.

“Well I’ve made friends, but as for the dating…I’m afraid some wounds take time to heal even after so many years.” I made a slight frown as I said that last part

“Well you’ll have to get over it sometime, you have to know that not all mare are the same, not all of them will only use you and the only way you can be sure of that is by getting rid of your social stigma.” She gave me a small speech .

“I know but I still don’t have that much confidence in me…By the way there’s something I wanted to ask you... well its more of a favor.”

“Well lay it on me you now you can count with me on anything, but make it quick because we have to get going.”

“There’s this one mare that is my friend and well she’s always wanted to join the Wonderbolts so I wanted to see if there was a chance you could give her an audition.”

“Well you know I have to consult the rest of the Wonderbolts team and see if there is an opening but yeah I’ll see what I can do, just give me the name of the pony and I’ll contact you to see what happens okay?”

“Okay, her name is Rainbow Dash.” I said hoping that she knew her

“Wait a second Rainbow Dash, she saved us at the Best Flyers Competition a few years back, plus she is the only Pegasus to ever do a Sonic Rainboom twice, I’m sure that’ll give some extra credit, well we have to go it was good seeing you again lil bro.” She always called me that even after Clyde was born.

“Well it was good seeing you too sister take care and I hope we see each other more frequently again.”

“Yeah, you should fly up to Cloudsdale one of this days.” She said as we both walked towards the door.

“You know I stopped flying a long time ago…”

“Your still holding on to the past? Just let it go Loaf, that’s the only thing you have to do if you truly want your fresh start that you been longing for so long.

“I guess your right… I have a lot of things to think of… well see you later Spitfire.” I said as she left Sugercube Corner.

“Yeah take care, oh I almost forgot, Soarin come on, time to leave.” She shouted as Soarin show up with a black eye.

“Yeah, yeah I’m coming, this one mare totally hoofed in the face with all her might.”
I went back inside and all of the sudden I was spotted by Rarity how rushed over to talk to me

“Darling how have you been?” she asked me as she got near.

“Fine I guess, really haven’t been able to socialize with anypony since I only know you and your friends, plus I’m not really the social type.” I said as i let out a little sigh.

“Well if you ask me, I’m here for you, you can talk to me about anything you want no problem what so ever.” She let out a big smile, I knew since we met that she has a little crush on me but I don’t mind, she really not my type either ways.

“Well I wanted to talk to somepony, not about a specific thing but more about them. I want to get to know somebody, I want to know their story, that’s all I really want to hear.” I said hoping I would finally be able to know somepony other than just their name.

“Why of course darling come on sit down I’ll tell you about me… I mean if that’s okay with you sweetie.” She said a little nervous, she liked me and I didn’t like her back well at least not in the same way.

“No problem I’m all ears.” I noticed Spike was looking at us, that when I remembered that Pinkie had slip her lips and told me that he had a crush on Rarity, I could tell he was a little bit angry but after I was done talking with her I would go and tell him I didn’t like her and only want her as a friend.

“Well it all start when I was a little filly, you see I’ve always loved designing cloths and well one day my school was going to have a play and I was in charge of making the costumes and well I was real frustrated because they weren’t all that good and well my horn started glowing and dragging me outside.”
I didn’t really put that much attention, I just started thinking about everything, my sister was right about the flying part, but really I have no reason to fly anymore, the only reason I could find would be if I met a mare that made me want to do all the stuff I stopped doing a long time ago but until then, I’m stuck being only on the ground.
After she was done talking I told her I was going to go the bathroom which was a complete lie but I didn’t want to keep talking in fact I was thinking about going home already.

“Hey you Loaf!” shouted Spike as he rushed over to me

“Oh hey Spike, I wanted to talk to you.” I turned around to face the baby dragon.

“Yeah I wanted to talk to you too, who do you think you are, just coming in and taking Rarity to yourself?” he sounded angry.

“Don’t worry, I have no interest what so ever in her, we’re only friends, nothing more.” I made sure I sounded convincing last thing I wanted was a total misunderstanding.

“Well I have my eye on you.” He said as he walked away.
I saw Fluttershy was by herself so I decided to go hang out with her, as the point the party was starting to die out, there weren’t that many ponies left

“Hello” I said as I walked up behind her.

“Ahh!” She let out a little scream, she got scared so easily, probably due to her shyness, we were the one that had the most in common,

“Sorry didn’t mean to scare you, I just wanted to talk.” I said quickly so she wouldn’t walk away.

“Oh no I’m sorry I overreacted, my bad…” she apologized as she turned to look at me

“Don’t worry, if anypony should be apologizing it needs to be me, I’m the one who scared you.” I said letting out a smile.

“Oh okay then, um Rainbow told me about your past, don’t worry she wouldn’t be able to do such a thing to you.” She smiled back at me

“Wait she told you all my story?” I was confused, why would she tell her not that its bad I can clearly see that Fluttershy isn’t a bad pony and she probably didn’t know it was a secret between us.

“Yeah, why? She wasn’t supposed to tell me?” I lowered her ears like if she was in trouble, she looked kind off cute now that I look at her with more detail.

“Nah don’t worry, it good I prefer that everypony knows my past, that way I have nothing to hide.”

“Well okay then if you say so… hey want to go sit down with me and Dash?” she asked as she started looking for her realizing she wasn’t where she last saw her.

“Sure. I need to tell her something.” We both started looking around for her, finally Fluttershy spotted Dash.

“Hey Loaf I found her she over there with…” she stopped talking when she saw that she was with Blues.

“Oh yeah I see her now.” I answered as I walked up next to Fluttershy.
But when we were getting close it happened… Dash kissed the colt she was with… I had been used again. I just froze right there where I was standing, Fluttershy saw it too and quickly froze next to me,

“Oh my goodness Loaf I’m so sorry” she said as she too witnessed what had just happened.

“Are you okay?” she asked more concerned.
I couldn’t believe this, I quickly felt tears falling to my cheeks, finally Dash turned over and saw me crying and quickly stopped what she was doing.

“Oh no! Loaf it’s not what it looks like!” she quickly got up and rushed over to me, I started backing up when she was almost near me.

“Please let me explain.” She begged me

“What do you want to explain, that you took advantage of me like the other mares did in my past? That he kissed you first? I opened up to you Dash, I told you all my secrets, and this is how you treat me, like a piece of useless crap? But I’m mean at the end that’s all I really am…” I said as I started to cry even more heavily.

“No you got this all wrong.” She said trying to get me to calm down.

“No… It’s my fault, I should have never tried to start over, I should have walked away when you went to apologize to me outside the alley.”

“Please Loaf just listen…”

“No…Not anymore…” I walked out Sugercube Corner, I didn’t need any of this, I just wanted to be by myself… I should of guessed the story would repeat itself.

“Well that was dramatic, now where were we Dash” Said Blues as if nothing had just happened, everypony else was in shock.

“Dash how could you?” Commented Fluttershy as she rushed out the door to catch up to Loaf, it was strange, Fluttershy never acted like that, she’s always shy and wouldn’t have ran out after him like that.

“He’s right, I betrayed him and just to get back with Blues…I’m a monster…” thought Rainbow Dash as she just stood there in the middle of the room.
All her friends where dumfounded for what had just occurred, Applejack and Twilight followed Fluttershy and Pinkie and Rarity stayed. Everypony was silent all of sudden finally after a few minutes Pinkie spoke up

“I think everypony should go hit the hay now” she said in an upset voice, but everypony did just that leaving only Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Spike and Pinkie Pie in the room, even Blues had left.
** ** **
I finally arrived at my house and hurried in and closed the door with one of my hind legs, I began to cry mindlessly and started to punch the wall, I couldn’t cope with this, the pain was massive, after a while I went into the kitchen and got a knife and sat down at the couch think about everything that has happed to me till that very moment.
** ** **
“Fluttershy wait up!” Screamed Applejack as she and Twilight tried to catch up to her.

“No girls, I need to talk to him by myself.” She said as she slowed down before getting to his house.

“But-” Applejack was interrupted by Twilight “No she’s right, Fluttershy is good with animals, who says she can’t handle this with a pony?”

“Thank you Twilight.” Said Fluttershy as she hurried again to get to Loaf’s house quickly.
** ** **
“Well Loaf, you had a decent run, now it’s time to depart from the world of the living” Said Loaf in a low voice as he was about to cut himself to take his life away, suddenly there was a knocking on the door

“Go away! I won’t be bothering anypony else after this” I shouted as I really didn’t care about anything anymore, sadly I had figured out at the last moment of my life that I could have fallen in love with Fluttershy, but why would somepony so cute want to be with a nonsocial piece of trash like me?

“No Loaf please open, don’t do anything stupid, we need to talk!” screamed Fluttershy, she knew Loaf was about to do something he could regret.

“Huh? Fluttershy? What do you need?” I asked as I got just a little bit of happiness in my heart, at least the last thing I would hear would be her sweet voice.

“Please just let me in I beg you, don’t do anything stupid.”
I had no choice I couldn’t bare hearing her so concerned, the least I could do was let her see me one last time, I got up from the couch and opened the door.

“You came back, Why?” I asked, why would she come if we only talked a bit at the party, yet again she also knew what I had been thru so l had no choice but to let her in

“Can I come in? I need to talk to you” she asked relieved that I had opened the door.

“Sure no problem, take a sit on the couch if you want.” I let her in and pointed her to the couch.

“We need to talk, you need to that you’re not the only shy one here, if you haven’t noticed, I’m shy as well.” She said as she looked at me.

“Really, you don’t seem shy, well around me you don’t.” I said, I knew she was shy but I didn’t care.

“You see… that’s the thing, I’m not shy around you, it’s like I’ve known you my whole life and I don’t act shy around you…. “ she answered but this time she looked away.

“Look Fluttershy, if you’re in love or feel the slightest thing for me, I hate to break it to you but all I can really be for anymare right now I nothing but a friend.” I had to make this clear, even if I had the slightest feeling for her, I had to protect her and myself.

“Oh… um very well… I just want you to know that I’m here for you whenever you need me, just count with me...” she said a little depressed

“I don’t want you to feel unloved Fluttershy its just you don’t know what I’ve been thru…” I said as I got closer to her.

“But I do know…” she replied

“Oh yeah I forgot, Dash told you my story…” I had forgotten about that.

“No it’s not because of that…”

“Then what is it?” I wanted to know, did Dash tell her about everything even my sex life.

“You really don’t remember do you?” she asked me as she turned to look at me.

“There are a lot of things I don’t remember, if you could please refresh my memory?”

“I was with you in middle school, in your science class.” That when it hit me, I remember her being new to the class right around the time when I started isolating myself, I remember my table partner, teasing me with having a crush on her, which I remember I did, she was one of the most beautiful mares I had seen but I didn’t talk to her because I was afraid to be used again.

“Yes that was me…I’ve always had a crush on you.” replied Fluttershy as she blushed a little.

“Well if I would have known that…” I said somberly, if only I would have talked to her things might have had been different. My thoughts were interrupted by Fluttershy

“What were you going to do with this knife?” she asked me about the knife which I had completely forgotten about it, but I figured there was no point on hiding the truth.

“I-I… I was going to suicide….”I could tell my words hit her hard cause she gasped heavily after I hurled those words at her.

“But…Why would you do such a thing?” She quickly became concerned.

“Well, after everything that happened today, I just want to go, I no longer wish to live, I’ve been standing a lot of problems my whole life, not just socially but mentally also.”

“Why would you think about that?”

“Look Fluttershy this isn’t nothing new, I’ve been thinking about this my whole life, my mind is set and I’m not backing out.”

“But this isn’t the solution.” I noticed some anger in her voice and couldn’t believe she would be talking to me like this, after all she does know me the best.

“But trust me, it’s the easiest.” I replied hoping she would drop the talk and leave me alone.

“What about friends? Friendship can help you and if you let me and my friends be part of your social life can change, just give us a chance.” She looked at me and by the judge of her face, she wasn’t leaving until I said yes.

“So… you promise you and your friends can help me out.” I tried to sound as interested as I could.

“Yes I promise, just give us a chance, not all of us are like the mares you’ve been with and I can guarantee that Rainbow Dash isn’t like that either, I just don’t know what’s up with her.” After much thought I finally came up with a response

“So you’re saying that if I give you and yours friends a chance and hang out with you girls, you can help me get over my phobia?”

“Yes, but please just don’t do anything stupid, just hang out with us tomorrow the whole day and then you can decide for yourself.” She gave me a little smile which made me trust her and made me unintentionally smile back.

“Fine, I’ll do it, for you Fluttershy.”

“Well in that case I’m gonna go now, see you tomorrow Loaf.” She said as she walked out the door. I just watched her leave down the dirt road. I had a lot to meditate over this night, after everything that happened, I still felt sad and started crying a bit as I headed up to my room to sleep, once I was ready and got into bed I thought about what my sister and Fluttershy had told me. They were both right, Spitfire on the whole flying part and Fluttershy with the solutions and they both were right with the social aspect of my life. I guess I have to leave everything up to Fluttershy and her friends for now. After many minutes of thinking and shedding a few tears still heartbroken about earlier I managed to get some rest, after all I did have a long day of head of me tomorrow.

Last Resort

I woke up rather neutral over what happened last night, I knew it wasn’t really anyponies fault and rather my own, I overreacted I had forgotten what I told her the night before. I decided I would go apologize to Dash after I got out of Sugercube Corner. So the only thing left to do was to start getting ready for the day.
** ** ** **
After I was done getting ready it was nearly 8 o’clock, it was almost time to open so I headed out the door, when suddenly something tackled me. I managed to turn over to face the thing that tackled me, finally I was able to focus on the pony and saw that it was Rainbow Dash

“Loaf just hear me out a sec!” Shouted Dash as she pinned me tight to the ground.

“Dash…”

“I don’t know what went thru my head it was like if I had a sudden shut down and I wasn’t able to control what I was doing….”

“Dash…”

“I please ask that you can forgive me, not now but sometime in your life”

“DASH!!!” I finally managed to get her off of me and stand up.

“Dash I can forgive you.”

“I understand…” She faced the ground and started crying softly.

“I mean I can’t forgive you because there’s nothing to be sorry about.” I smiled at her hoping she would look at me.

“Huh…” she had looked up at me with a dumbfounded expression on her face.

“If anypony should ask for forgiveness it should be me, I overreacted and it was me who told you we should be just friends, and because of that I have no right to tell you who to date, I ask you to forgive me, we should just stay friends, you’re the first pony I’ve met and I don’t want to ruin that so what do you say?” I looked at her and smiled while I waited for an answer.

“I…I… forgive you Loaf and thank you for not being angry at me.” She whipped off the tears off her face.

“Well I have to get going, gotta go work, I’m going to hang out with Fluttershy later, want to tag along?” I asked her as I started trotting towards Sugercube Corner.

“Sure thing.” She said with a small smile.

“Okay then see you later Dash.” I waved as I got further away.

Loaf walked into Sugercube Corner, he heard noises coming from the kitchen so he guessed that it was Pinkie Pie already baking some stuff.

“Pinkie! I’m here what do I do?” I said as I walked into the kitchen to see Pinkie taking out some muffins from the oven.

“Oh! Loaf you’re here, I need to ask you some stuff about, last night but only if you’re willing to answer me cause if you don’t want to that’s perfectly fine so I’ll go ahead and ask you, ready?” I only understood half of what she said.

“Sure… I guess?”

“First of all are you okay, do you have any thoughts of hurting yourself?” Dang did Dash tell of them yet again it could’ve been Fluttershy.

“No, why do you ask?”

“Well it’s just that you seem like a good pony and you seem like you could be a good friend and I don’t want you hurting yourself, and please understand that Rainbow Dash isn’t like that.”

“Don’t worry she went to see me today before I left, we got everything solved, turns out it was my fault, I overreacted a bit.” I gave a small smile hoping we could stop talking about the matter.

“Okie dokie lokie, but if you need to talk to somepony just come to me, im all ears, well not really but imagine how I would look.”

“Okay, thank you Pinkie, well let’s get started with the baking!”

The rest of the day went okay and rather fast, thankfully around 3’o clock we finished all the orders and I was free for the rest of the day, which is what I needed, I had to get some stuff done before I went with Fluttershy.

I decided I would go to the café, I needed to eat something.
“What am I going to do? What if Fluttershy or Rainbow Dash told all of them my story and all the little details? I sure as heck don’t want them all to know I’m a virgin, it’s just the thought of how special that act can be, that makes me feel unsafe, what if I have sex with a mare, what if she breaks up with me just days later? I couldn’t deal with that pressure, also what if I hurt her? Not only physical but psychologically, at least I didn’t tell them that I don’t tend to swear, only when I really angry or sad.” I had forgotten I was walking, thankfully I came back to my senses before I got to the café, that’s when I saw that familiar face, I didn’t know for sure it was her until I went inside the café.

“Ditzy? Is that you?” I headed up to her, I saw she was with a young filly, could that be her daughter?

“Loaf, its been ages, I thought I’d never see you again.” I got up her table to go hug me tightly, she was the one pony I hadn’t talked to the most in the last years.

“I’m glad to see you Ditzy, it’s been what? 3 years?” I didn’t know but I knew she didn’t also so I just went with a small amount hoping she wouldn’t remember.

“6 years…6 LONG years I didn’t know nothing about you Loaf, for heaven’s sake I thought you were dead, I thought that you had hit rock bottom and took the only “solution” you knew, why didn’t you ever visit?” I realized that we were the best of friends and I realized that I had hurt her plenty by not talking to her in that period of time.

“But I’m here now aren’t I?

“But nothing, you don’t know how much pain I went thru in those years? You can’t just expect me to forget about that in a few moments.” She interrupted by the young filly

“Mommy, can we leave now?” asked the small filly as she looked at me with some fear in here eyes, most likely because of me or because Ditzy was shouting.

“Yes honey, Goodbye Loaf.” She said as she headed towards the door.

“So that’s it? That’s the end of our friendship? Just because of a small error I made?” I started to feel a bit angry.

“You call that a small error?” with that she walked out of the café with the filly behind her. At this point I lost my appetite but to not seem like a fool I ordered something to go.
I felt like trash, yet again I always do, I was going to have to apologize but she probably doesn’t want to see me again. Finally I reached my house, turned on the TV, ate my sandwich and fell asleep, at this point I had forgotten about the get together. Suddenly there was a knocking at the door.

“Huh? Coming!” I hurried up the couch up to the door to see who it was, to my surprise it was Rarity.

“Oh um... Hi Rarity, what brings you here?” I asked still trying to fully wake up

“Oh I just thought I pass by to see how you’re doing that’s all.” She said as she walked in, didn’t really tell she could but who cares.

“Wait, did you come to talk to me about last night?” I knew she had a reason to come here and what other than last night’s fiasco.

“Well besides that there’s something I want to know…” I headed over to the couch where she was already sitting and sat down beside her, she put her hoof on my leg which made me rather uncomfortable.

“Umm... yeah what is it?” I looked at her and saw she was looking back directly at me.

“Well I was thinking since you and Dash are only friends now…”

“Go on….” I could only guess what she was going to say next.

“You deserve a lady and not a brute for a marefriend so if you want a date I’m here for you.” She leaned close to me as she were going for a kiss which only made the whole situation more unpleasant so I quickly got up from the couch before she continued.

“Wait a second Rarity, I just went thru something hard in my life and it’s not something you forget easily, plus Dash and I weren’t dating before yesterday, we were only friends so it was my fault I overreacted besides I only like you as a friend, nothing more, but there is another guy that likes you…” I didn’t like the idea of going out with her, not that she’s not pretty but she’s too fancy for me.

“Humph and what’s wrong with me? Am I not too good for you? Am I not too rough like Dash?” I could tell she was getting angry.

“Don’t take like that it’s just that I’m not going to date a pony somebody else has liked for a longer time period plus I don’t like rough mares I like mares who have different attitudes not just monotone personalities.”

“Well in that case I can be something else than just a lady.” Her horn started glowing and I soon felt something wrapping around my body which I soon found out was a near by blanket

“Rarity what are you doing?! Let me go now!” I pleaded as I tried to break free which was no use.

“IM NOT LEAVING UNTIL YOU SAY YES AND I GET A KISS FROM YOU!!!!” she had snapped, and I was the only thing that could make her come back to her senses.

“GET OFF ME NOW!!” I was on the edge of crying and I don’t know why.

“IF YOU WONT KISS ME THAN I GUESS I’LL HAVE TO GET IT MYSELF!!” she got on top of me and started to lean into my face to kiss me. Finally she got what she wanted and in that moment I heard a familiar voice coming from the door sadly it had to be her.

“Loaf, Fluttershy made me come get you—“It was Dash who saw me and Rarity in mid-kissing,

“WHAT THE HAY ARE YOU DOING!” out of the five it had to be her, finally Rarity stopped the spell and I was able to break free.

“Wait Dash it not what it looks like!” I had made the same mistake she did the night before only this time it was Rarity’s fault.

“This is why you wanted us to be just friends huh? Asshole!” She shouted at me as she ran out the door, at this point I forgot about Rarity’s presence and ran out behind her with tears in my eyes.

“Wait, Dash let me explain!” I shouted as I almost caught up to her.

“NO! GET AWAY FROM ME!” I managed to catch her before she started flying away and pinned her down to the ground like she did in the morning.

“GET OFF ME YOU PRICK!” she kicked and moved around trying to break free.

“NO! Not until you listen!”

“YOU SAID YOU DIDN’T LIKE HER!” she started to shed tears.

“I DON’T! SHE WAS THE ONE THAT KISSED ME!” I lowered my voice so I could continue. “She came to my house and started telling me about how I should date her. I said I didn’t want to and that’s when she snapped and wrapped me in the blanket to kiss me.”

“YEAH RIGHT, LIKE I WOULD BELIEVE THAT!”

“I don’t expect you to…Everywhere I go in my life; nobody has ever believed me…” I then let go of her.

“I didn’t kiss her Dash, I swear…” I looked straight into her eyes that where filled with tears.

“ASSHOLE!” she punched me in the face and then flew off leaving back a trail of tears.

“IM SORRY DASH!” I shouted as I got up and broke into tears as I saw her fly away, I had to head back to my house to talk to Rarity, and luckily she was still there.

“Oh dear did that brute hit you?” She seemed to not care what she had just done

“Get the hell out…” I told her as I pointed outside.

“My, my no need to use that tone and language with me”

“Don’t bullshit me Rarity, You know what you did, now go fix it.” I lost my temper and started swearing.

“Fine…” she said as she left my house, I was so frustrated, how could she just do that to me and her friend? All I could do was wait and blame myself for what had happened even if it wasn’t my fault.

“I should have known he only wanted me to get close to my friends” Dash flew as she got near to where Fluttershy was waiting, she was lost in thoughts that she almost left her behind.

“What’s wrong? Where’s Loaf” asked Fluttershy as Dash landed next to her in full sorrow.

“I don’t care about him anymore, he can go die for all I care!” said Dash as she looked to the ground trying to hide her tears.

“What did he do?” asked Fluttershy now more concerned.

“I caught him kissing Rarity in his house.”

“What?” Fluttershy got a bit upset over the news.

“I DON’T WANT TO KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT HIM ANYMORE!” Shouted Dash

“But you’re only friends; did you forget already what he told you? You don’t have any right to tell him who to date.
“Wait…you’re right…” this sudden memory made her realize that this time she was the one who overreacted.

“Oh what have I done? I have to apologize to him right away.”

“It’s rather late already; maybe you should wait until tomorrow.” Said Fluttershy, she knew that Loaf didn’t have the fault and that he knew it as well so he wouldn’t be able to hurt himself over something he knew was his fault.

“Why am I still alive? I messed up my entire life, why should I stay here and mess up other ponies friendships? That’s it. I won’t kill myself but rather move away, away from civilization and move somewhere dangerous like the Everfree Forrest, a place filled with a lot of manticores, I’ll be a good snack for them.” I had made up my mind. I’ll only take a few stuff and head out tonight, and in the morning I won’t be anypony’s problem anymore.
“So long Ponyville and Equestria, Loaf is about to stop being a drag for all of you!” I shouted as I headed outside my house and started trotting towards the forest.

“No need to cry for me…” I started to remember how many ponies I would probably hurt my killing myself, yet again I not killing myself rather a wild beast is so it would just look like an accident. But no turning back now, my mind was set and I wasn’t backing out now. I started to cry a little remembering everything that had happened in the last two days.
“I’m sorry Dash and Fluttershy…” I whispered as I shed a few tears.

Untold Stories

Sorry for the late chapter, been having problems with my internet. I'm sure this chapter will clear up alot of things.

As I approached the forest I was having second thoughts about what I was going to do, as I got near the forest I saw a small cottage with lots of animals around it, there lights inside the cottage but I couldn’t tell if there was anypony there, a shadow quickly responded that question but I didn’t care and kept walking until I heard Fluttershy’s voice

“Loaf is that you?” I heard her call out from the door, I quickly ran behind a tree hoping she wouldn’t come after me, luckily she didn’t after that I kept walking into the forest.

“Loaf is stupid if he thinks I’m going to apologize to Dash, he is mine and no other mare will have him.” Rarity was getting ready to go to bed, she had set her mind that she wasn’t going to do what Loaf had asked her. Suddenly she heard a knocking at her door she quickly ran thinking that it might be Loaf coming to ask if she did him the favor but to her surprise it was Rainbow Dash.

“Oh Dash! What brings you here?” Rarity asked knowing that she came here to talk about earlier.

“I just came to say that I’m sorry for overreacting earlier, I was real harsh on you and Loaf, especially with Loaf, I hit him in my rage and came here first to apologize for interrupting your kiss with him.” Dash was sad but still didn’t believe what Loaf had told her.

“Oh well…um….apology accepted Dash, if you would like to come in and-”

“No thanks I just came here for that, now I have to go apologize to Loaf, see you later Rarity.

“Oh very well than, goodbye Dash.”

“Perfect just my luck, she thinks me and Loaf are dating, now he is all mine!” thought Rarity as she saw her friend fly away.

Dash arrived at Loaf’s house but noticed something strange, the front door was slightly open but all the lights were off, she slowly walked in hoping that they weren’t stealing his house.

“Hello? Loaf are you here?” Dash called out but there was no respond, she turned on the light in the living room and saw that there was a small notebook in the center table. She opened the small notebook and started reading the first page.

To who may care or is stealing my home.

I decided to move to the Everfree forest, why? Because I made to many errors and mistakes in my life, I can’t live with the guilt knowing that I messed up the most in these last few days, I no longer will be a drag for anypony and no longer be a piece of trash everybody trips over, Don’t look for me because it is most likely I will have died already, probably because of not eating or because I got eaten by a manticore or something worse.

The worst pony ever.

Bread Loaf
Rainbow Dash felt so much pain in her that moment, like if she had been ripped apart from her wings, she was in total grief but turned the page and saw two lists.

Ponies that will care about my absence. 0

Ponies I would have loved to have said goodbye to. Rainbow Dash, Ditzy, Whooves, Fluttershy, Twilight, Pinkie Pie, Applejack, Rarity.

Rainbow Dash could not believe what she had just read, she quickly flew out of his house towards Fluttershy’s so that she could help her look for him.

“Well this isn’t what I expected.” I couldn’t help but to speak to myself, I’ve done it in the past, why not do it now? Finally I came across a small cave

“Nice, I can stay here for the night; tomorrow morning I continue my walk.”
“I wonder if I’m truly making the right choice. I can head back now, but, what if somepony already read the massage I left? What if it was anypony important like Rainbow Dash? She surely stop talking to me after this.” I was about to drift off to sleep when I heard a loud roar come from inside the cave, I know I came here to die but instinct got the best of me and I started running. When I was outside the cave still running I turned to see what that roar was but I was quickly confronted with a manticore, I only reacted by running even faster but the manticore did the same, I hit my maximum speed but so did he, I was so busy looking back at him that I didn’t notice I was heading towards a dead end. Finally I hit a tall mountain with my only way out being heading back the way I came, the worst part was that in my left there was a great fall and to my right the rest of the mountain as I turned around I saw the manticore slowly approaching me.

“Nice manticore…. Your a big boy you wouldn’t hurt a small pony would you?” I tried to reason with the beast but it was of no use It licked it's lips as it pinned me more and more against the mountain.

I let out a big sigh and thought to myself “Well Loaf, it looks like this is you’re end.” But then I felt a great relief when I heard two beautiful voices coming from the sky.

“LOAF!” Rainbow Dash screamed as she looked around with Fluttershy flying right behind her.
I felt a big smile appear on my face I turned over to see the manticore that was still getting closer. “Not today big guy. HEY GIRLS DOWN HERE!” I screamed to get their attention which I thankfully did manage.

“LOAF!” they both screamed in joy as they flew down quickly at me.
The manticore noticed them too and turned around to face them but hit me with his tail, I was knocked back at the mountain and went unconscious for a brief second, as I woke up I heard the girls scream as the manticore launched at them, then all of a sudden my heroism kicked in and I picked up a nearby rock and threw it at the beast to get its attention.

“HEY JERK FACE! LEAVE MY FRIENDS ALONE!” I yelled as I rushed towards him and tackled him.

“LOAF! Be careful” Shouted Fluttershy as she took her hoofs of her face to avoid witnessing the scene.

“Yeah let him go loaf, his not worth it lets just get out of here!” begged Dash as they both witnessed the fight that was going on.

“Sorry girls, but I took my choice and I’m going through with it.” As I tackled the manticore more and more towards the edge of the mountain.

“But you’re going to fall off!” shouted Fluttershy who was starting to cry.

“That’s the plan.” I said in just a high voice so they could hear. Finally I managed to push the manticore enough over the edge so the he would slip but he didn’t go down just yet, right as I gave the final tackle I felt his claws sink into my wings, this is when I found out what he had planned, I turned over to see Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy, they had sad looks on their faces, especially Rainbow.

“Goodbye girls…” I said with a big smile on my face, at this point it started to rain, so my tears were easily mixed in with the drops of water that fell in my face. I finally turned back to the manticore and gave that final push.

“LOAF, NO!” Shouted Dash as she watched him fall down the mountain with the manticore still sinking his claws in Loaf’s wings. They both rushed down to catch Loaf but right when they were flying down it was too late, Loaf’s body was just inches away from hitting the ground and not even a sonic Rainboom could save him. Rainbow closed her eyes as she impulsed herself to her limit but it was too late, right when she was about to reach his body, she heard the worse noise ever. She heard a loud thud and she quickly opened her eyes to witness the ghastly scene, She landed just a few feet away from where Loaf’s bleeding body laid on top of the dead manticore, her crying became more and more strong as she approached him, Fluttershy landed shortly after and she too was crying. They both finally reached his body and quickly saw a true miracle, they noticed he was still breathing.

“FLUTTERSHY! QUICK GRAB HIS LEGS!” commanded Dash as she turned over to see Fluttershy.

“Why? He’s dead…” She said in a sad tone.

“CANT YOU SEE? HE IS STILL BREATHING!”

“What are you… are you serious?” she said as she ran up to his bleeding body.

“Never mind just grab his saddlebag and let’s get him to the hospital” Rainbow Dash picked him up and put him on her back which started to get stained with blood.

“Okay no problem.” said Fluttershy as she picked up the saddlebag she noticed it felt really light, like if it didn’t have anything in it, she shook it and felt something move inside.

“COME ON FLUTTERSHY! LETS GO!” shouted Rainbow Dash as she started to fly away.

“Excuse me” Said Ditzy as she ran up to the front desk of the clinic.

“Oh hello how may I help you?” Responded the nurse from behind the desk

“I need to know the room number for the patient Bread Loaf please.” Ditzy needed to know what happened and quick. She was beginning to shed a few tears but managed to hold them back.

“Oh yes, his room number is 237, he has two other guests up there just so you know.

“Okay, thanks.” Said Ditzy as she ran off to find the room where her friend was.

Ditzy rushed into the room to see Loaf in the bed connected to a few machines and Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy sitting on his sides.

“What happened to him?” Asked Ditzy as she walked in.

“Derpy? What are you doing here?” Responded Fluttershy cleaning off some tears of here face.

“I saw you girls fly him in to hospital, plus I’m his friend I deserve to be here as much as you two now tell me what happened.” Replied Ditzy as she noticed Dash looking deeply into Loaf’s body like if she was lost in thoughts.

“Well by what Dash told me it all started earlier today, She walked into Loaf’s house and saw him and Rarity kissing and well she took it the wrong way because the night before she made the mistake of kissing her ex-coltfriend and well Loaf saw her and thought that he was getting revenge and She ran off and Loaf followed her and explained to her what had happened and she didn’t believe him so she hit him in the eye but later she regretted herself and went back to his house and then she read a note he left saying we didn’t have to worry about him anymore and that he was trash, then we ran off to the Everfree forest cause that’s where he said he was going, then we found him being pinned up to a mountain by a manticore, me and Rainbow Dash saw him and flew down to help him but when we landed the manticore was about to attack us and Loaf threw a rock at him and started tackling him towards the edge of the mountain and then the manticore sunk his claws into his wings and then he told us goodbye and pushed himself off alongside with the manticore.” Fluttershy laid out the whole situation without even brething in until the end, Ditzy just analyzed the whole thing, she started crying softly cause she remembered her last conversation with him, she forgot how sensitive he was with social aspects.

“I can’t believe he told me his whole story and this is how I treated him…” Rainbow Dash finally spoke up after she came back to her senses.

“It’s obvious he didn’t tell you his whole story.” Said Ditzy in between tears that she then whiped off.

“What do you mean? How do you know him so much?” Asked Dash as she turned away from Loaf to look at her, she forgot the whole fact that she thought she was sort of wrong in the head due to her eyes.

“Because, I’ve been his Friends since we were in 5th grade.”

“Wait so you’ve known him your whole life?” asked Fluttershy in slight surprise.

“Of course, I was his first friend ever and then Whooves.” She said as she got closer to his body to take a look at him.

“I don’t get it, why didn’t he just fly away?”

“That’s because-” Ditzy was rudely interrupted when Doctor Heartblade walked in.

“Um girls can I talk to you for a second?”

“Will he be fine? When will he be healthy enough to take him home?” Rainbow Dash asked desperate for an answer.

“Well…. Good news are he was really lucky to have survived a fall like that…”

“And what are the bad news?” Asked Ditzy as she turned over to see Loaf’s unconscious body

“He fell into a coma due to the impact, his head must have hit pretty hard against the manticore’s body and well…” The doctor then looked to a graph he had with all of the test results.

“When will he wake up?” asked Rainbow Dash, she just wanted him to hear her apology.

“That’s the problem, the impact was so hard that it may take days, weeks even years maybe.”

“NO! HE HAS TO WAKE UP NOW!” Rainbow Dash yelled as she started to cry.

“Dash calm down.” Said Ditzy in a demanding yet low tone.

“I’m sorry girls.” Said the doctor as he left

“This can’t be, last thing I told him what that he was an asshole and then I punched him.” She then started crying heavily over his bed “PLEASE FORGIVE ME LOAF!”

“Dash calm down, it wasn’t your fault.” Said Ditzy as she pulled her off the bed.

“YES IT IS!”

“It’s not just your fault, I also hurt him, the day I saw him I said some pretty bad stuff to him but he also did this because he was bound to snap one day.” Ditzy grabbed Dash and made her look at her in the eyes.

“Wha…What do you mean?” Asked Fluttershy wanting to know more.

"Sit down, there's alot I have to tell you girls about him." Ditzy sat down next to Loaf's bed as she pointed towards some chairs.

"What happened?" i slowly woke up and whiped my eyes before realizing i was in a white room.

"What is this place? Hello, anybody here?" This was strange, last thing i remember was seeing Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy in the Everfree Forrest. I thought as i slowly began walking around trying to find a door or something.

"I see you finally woke up." Said a mystirious voice.

"Who said that? And where am I? Am I dead? Is this heaven or hell?" I knew i was dead i just needed to know where i had gone.

"No this is neither and you're not dead, not again that is." There was a sudden flash and before me was none other than Princess Celestia herself.

"Princess? What are you doing here? What is this place?" I had so many questions I needed to be answered.

"All in good time Loaf, first of all youre not dead, you are unconcious in the Ponyville hospital." Celestia slowly got closer to Loaf as she answered one of his questions.

"So... I'm not dead but I'm not alive either?" I looked up at her.

"Something like that." Celestia gave a little smile as she looked down at the little stallion.

"So this is like a limbo?"

"Well again something like that."

"Then why are you here Princess?" I was kind off dumbfounded by this fact that i wasn't dead or alive.

"Well I used a special spell that lets me be here."

"What for?"

"I beg your pardon?" The Princess was caught off guard by this response.

"Yeah why are you here? How did you know what happened to me?" I still thought this whole thing could be a dream or something.

"I been watching you for a really long time." The Princess gave off a little smile as she looked down at Loaf.

"What do you mean?" This was scary, watching me?

"Don't tell me you forgot already about the letter?" The Princess quickly got a concerned, she thought he would remeber by now.

"Letter... Oh, you mean that old piece of paper with words i sent you when i was in middle school?" I had forgotten about that thing but it's not like i was expecting it to work, it only made me feel good thinking she would consider reading it.

"Yes, ever since i read it i've been watching you, i even helped you with what you asked me." Her smile suddenly came back.

"What do you mean? Nothing changed after i sent you that letter, i didn't meet that special mare, heck she didn't ever show up." I looked at the ground, i was remembering alot of things at this point that only made me feel sad.

"What do you mean? I started helping you the very next day i got that letter, i even used my magic to transfer that special mare to your class." She couldn't believe what she was hearing, could it be possible that he was not able to see her?

"Well no, unless you refresh my memory, nothing got better after that day." I looked up at her, i cleaned up a tear that had started to go down my cheek.

"Very well then, if you must, I shall show you, it surprises me though, she lives in Ponyville too." Her horn started glowing and suddenly there was a cloud in front of both of them.

"Good Morning class!" Said Mr.Clovebeam.

"Good morninig Mr.Clovebeam!" Exclamied the whole Class as the Profesor placed his books on his desk.

"I'm excited to anounce that we have a new student here that will be joining our class today, please if you may step in." Mr.Clovebeam signeld towards the door with a hand movment indicating the young mare to come in.

"Now class i like you all to give Fluttershy a nice warm welcome." Said the profesor as Fluttershy slowly walked in, she was very shy and she tried to say hi aswell but the rest of the class only heard a slight squeel.

"Well, Fluttershy, you can go sit right over... Over there!" Said Mr.Clovebeam as he pointed towards Loaf who was sitting by himself, like he always does.

"Oh, ok then..." Fluttershy slowly started walking towards the desk where Loaf was, she avoided eye contact with the rest of the classroom, afraid that they would say something, finally she reached her destination. As she was about to sit down, there was a loud thump on the ground, the noise came from Loaf's saddlebag that was resting on the chair and due to the rapid movment, it had fallen from its resting place.

"Oh I'm so sorry i didn't see it hanging there." Fluttershy quickly apologized and was about to pick it up but Loaf beat her to it.

"No problem, it's my fault, i shouldn't have put it there in the first place." Loaf quickly picked up the bag and placed this time on his chair.

"Oh...ok then." Fluttershy simply sat down and started to pull out her notebook and pencil but quickly realized she had forgotten it and became rather frustreated at herself.

"Here, you can borrow my spare pencil." She turned over to see Loaf's hoof reaching out with a pencil in it, he didn't see to have and expresion on his face.

"Oh...um thanks." Fluttershy simply responded as she took the pencil from him.

"Um sorry to bother you again but whats your name? I mean if you want to tell me that's fine if you dont want to...."

"The names Bread Loaf but my friends call me Loaf." Loaf simply kept writting down on his notebook, not willing to look at Fluttershy at all.

"Oh...What a lovely name..." Fluttershy felt she was starting to annoy him.

"Thanks..." Again Loaf responded without looking at Fluttershy.

"Wait! So you mean this whole time it was Fluttershy? But it don't make any sense what so ever, I mean she so shy and stuff it just wouldn't work." I was shocked and a bit angry, if she would have told me sooner maybe all this wouldn't have happend.

"It makes the most perfect sense, but since you're heart was so overcomed with saddness and grief, you weren't able to give any other pony a try to make you see otherwise, if you would've talked more to Fluttershy, she would have had the courage to tell you what she felt for you." The princess spoke the truth, but Loaf didn't give any other pony a try until a few days ago.

"Oh man...I've got to fix this...somehow..." I was again sad, there was a beutiful mare waiting for me this whole time but i didn' give her the oppurtunity to get to let her express herself.

"Please Princess, You have to have a spell that'll make me wake up, i have alot to fix." I turned over to the Princess and begged.

"There is one thing you can do..." Princess Celestia turned over to see Loaf who was was laying on his knees.

"Really! What is it? I'll do anything i promise." Loaf quickly got excited over the news.

"Be patient." The Princess smiled at him as she got up, her horn starting to glow.

"What? Celestia please there has to be a spell or something, please just make me wake up now, from this nightmare." I started to let out a few tears.

"Dont worry my little pony, Everypony will be there when you wake up from your coma, all you have to do is wait, maybe think about what you'll tell Fluttershy." suddenly there was a large glow in the vast white room and Celestia dissapeared.

"Wait no! Damn it! There has to be a way Celestia!" I shouted as i ran around looking for the princess who had dissapeared.

"Great... What am I supposed to say? Sorry for ignoring you for the past 11 years, sorry for not even hanging out with you? Sorry for going out with one of your best friends? This is crap, I need to go back...er...wake up, i hate this, why didn't i just die back there..." I let out a big sigh as I sat down. " Well all i have to do is...wait."

"Well it all starts when Loaf moved here from Cloudsdale, he was 10 at the time and was in 5th grade, everything was fine, the only problem was that he was very very shy, he only talked when the teacher asked him, i was a year older then him and well that was a special school and it went from first grade to eight grade, and his classroom was next to mine so i would often pass by and see him, everyfilly would be talking except him, he would just write and write, so one day i decided to talk to him in recess, i slowly approched him, he was sort of scared since he flinched alot, i came up to him and introduced myself, then about a minute passed and he told me his name, i asked him why he didn't talk to anypony in his classroom, he simply responded that he had tried but none of them ever listened, i was shocked by this answer and asked him if he wanted to be my friend, then is was like he turned into another pony, he smiled so big i couldn't believe him, so the rest of that year went great, he told me alot about himself, nothing to important just why he had moved, he also told me that he had tried to kill himself before because of his constant depression, i was again shocked at this and told him that i was there for him and that i didn't want him to hurt himself. Everything looked great and the school year was soon over but his newly found happiness would slowly start dissapearing the next year." Dizty started explaining Loaf's life as Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash just listened.

"Wow, he is kind of like me..." Said Fluttershy as she turned over to look at Ditzy.

"Please continue...I need to know more..." Rainbow Dash had and expressionless face but her tone expressed what she was feeling,sorrow.

"In 6th grade we met another one of our friends, Whooves, he was pretty funny, always makeing alot of jokes, but Loaf's depression soon arrived in his life again when his new teacher started messing with him, it started with her telling Loaf's that he had written on one of the desk, which wasn't true. He had to stay after class and clean up all the desks, He got a bit upset because it wasn't true and his parents grounded him, worst thing is it was on a weekend and we were going to go eat out. Then once she started to kick him out of class for no reason what so ever then depending the season of the year she would make him sit the sun or in the shadows, then everypony in his class stopped talking to him, not even if it was team work would they talk to him, one of them even hit him, he would go to where nopony would see him or hear him and cry, very heavily, he would often scream about how he shouldn't have been born and how he was the worst pony to ever see the light of day." Ditzy let out a few tears, it hurt her to see his best friend like that.

"How did you know he cried?" Rainbow Dash asked as her face finally showed the expression of doubt in her face.

"Somepony had to calm him down...Well but towards the winter vacations, she said something that really triggered him, something that made him fall into a world of sorrow and grief it made him shut down from the real world, the teacher started asking everypony what they wanted, she asked Loaf who said he wanted a puppy, but her, being the evil mare she is simply responded "Everypony hates you, i don't think you deserve it for all the bad things you've done" this made him snap completely, he ran out the classroom, luckily the day was over when she said that and me and Whooves managed to see him running out of the school gates at top speed and into the Whitetail woods, us being the good friends we are went out looking for him, Whooves was the one that found him, he was crying on the edge of the mountain, he was looking down the edge, Whooves screamed telling him not to do it, he didn't respond, I sneeked around the bottom of the mountain, when he jumped off i managed to catch him and Whooves soon flew down himself and we pinned him down, he tried to break free and started crying more heavily, we asked him what was wrong, why did he try to kill himself again, finally after much effort he hit rock bottom and finally spoke up, we were shocked when he told us, how a teacher could possibly say that, he made us promise not to tell his parents, and after much begging from his part we agreed not to say anything."
Ditzy had a hard time saying all this, they were sad memories that she would've liked to forget but couldn't

"So this was all from built up stress?" Asked Fluttershy as she looked over to Loaf who remainded in his bed still in his coma that could last forever.

"And that girls is why he did it, since that day he changed, he wasn't even close to his former self after that happened, i don't even think he has ever been happy since." Ditzy too looked over at Loaf's bed as if any moment he would wake up.

"But he has been happy, he always smiled when he was with me or the other girls." At this point Rainbow Dash was crying softly, trying not to disturb the other patients in the next rooms.

"He learned how to fake it, he has never truly been happy in the last 11 years." Ditzy got up from the chair where she was sitting. "Well i have to get home, my daughter is probably worried, plus i have to break the news to Whooves, maybe he'll come visit."

"Yeah i have to get home too...coming Rainbow?" Fluttershy was about to walk out as she turned over to see Rainbow Dash.

"No...I'll stay in case he wakes up." Rainbow Dash took a sit closer to Loaf's bed.

"But...You heard what the doctor said." Fluttershy wanted to stay too but she managed to understand that he could take alot to wake up.

"I don't care...I'm waiting..." Rainbow Dash rested her head on the side off the bed not looking away from Loaf, hoping he would open up his eyes any moment.

Awake

I might be getting a graphic tablet during this week so i've been thinking of making a comic for this story, so yeah tell me what you think.

CHAPTER 7: Awake

5 Months Later...

"How long has it been? Probably a few hours only, but it feels like its been way longer then that, anyways its probably going to be night, I'm starting to feel a bit sleepy." I let out a big yawn then I laid on the ground and fell asleep.

Loaf slowly opened his eyes, he found himself laying on the hospital bed attched to alot of machines.

"Wow... this is a freaky dream." Loaf slowly sat up on his bed, then a nurse walked in,
"Oh um hello there." Loaf looked at the nurese who was in full awe.

"Oh good heavens... your...your lucky to be alive." The nurse managed to speak out after a few moments.

"What do you mean?" At this point Loaf still thought this was a dream.

"We were about to take you off life support, you've been in coma for over 5 months now." The nurse was shocked, he was truely luckly, a few more seconds and he would be dead.

"So...its December?" Loaf didn't sound as shocked as he should of had been, he didn't mind the time but he was more worried on his friends and Fluttershy.

"Yes its the 10th."

"Well i guess i better get going, theres some stuff i need to do." Loaf disconnected all the machines from his body and got out of the bed with no problems.

"But we still have to run test on you, to see if everything is healed properly, plus you probably want to know what has happend in the last few months." The nurse started trotting over to Loaf who was just about ready to go, he had already put on his saddlebag.

"I feel fine, and i really don't care what has happend, just send the bill to my house." Loaf said with a rather playful tone.

"But..."

"Wait there is one thing i need to know..." Loaf paused outside of his room

"What would that be?" The nurse asked

"Did anypony ever visit me?" Loaf had to know, the answer would decide wether he would go looking for any of his friends or he simply walk away from Ponyville.

"There were quite a few ponies that came by, one of them stopped coming about a week ago and the other about 3 weeks ago, then there quite a few that came every once in a while." The nurse had a detailed list of the ponies.

"Did they ever tell you their names, you know the 2 that came more often?" Loaf was intrigued, he wasn't expecting that answer.

"Well the one that stopped coming 3 weeks ago was called Rainbow Dash and the one that stopped coming a week ago was called Fluttershy i believe, but i dont know what happend that when Fluttershy last came she left the hospital crying." The nurse was pleased with answering the newly awake patient.

"Okay... thanks I'll get going now, thanks for not disconnecting me." Loaf let out a small chuckle as he walked out the door leaving the nurse laughing aswell.

Loaf found himself walking up to Fluttershy's cottage, he remebered which was it was due to him walking thru here a few months back.
As he walked up to the door he realized he didn't know exactly what he was going to say, finally he settled with letting what ever happens make out the conversation. Finally he knocked the door and heard some hoofsteps coming from behind the door.

"Oh hello there." said a strange voice.

"Oh um... hi" Loaf nearly broke down when he saw another mare open the door.

"How can i help you?" asked the mare as she scanned this strange pegasus.

"Um is Fluttershy here?" Loaf asked as he took a look inside the house, there was no sign of her.

"Oh no dear she moved about a week ago." Said the mare behind the door.

"What? Do you no where she moved?" Loaf was on the brink of breaking down right there on the mares porch.

"Sorry i don't know, all i know is that she still lives in Ponyville, but very far from here, towards the outskirts of the city."

"Well, sorry for bothering you and thanks." Loaf said as he headed back towards his house.

"No problem." The mare closed the door and Loaf began his walk home.

I took out my key from my saddlebag and walked into my house, i sat on my couch and as usual started thinkg.
"Well,what did i learn? Celestia lied, Fluttershy moved apprently not wanting to know anything about me, and all my other friends really didn't want to visit me. Yup that seems right." It was barley noon and i was starting to feel a bit hungry.

"Well i better go into town and buy something." I slowly got up from the couch and headed towards my room to get some money, luckly i've always had a stash so i'll survive until i get a new job, cause i doubt Pinkie Pie hasn't waited for me to wake up and still go and work like if nothing had happend. I began to walk down the road into the city.

"Good afternoon sir, what will you be having?" Said the waiter as he walked up to my table.

"Just a hayburger and a lemonade." I went with something simple, i was really caught thinking when he arrived.

"Very well sir, your food will be here in a few moments." The waiter walked away as he handed the order to the cooks.

"I should go ask Twilight where Fluttershy is living but yet again, what would i say? I've gotta make up my mind, i cant expect to find Fluttershy while avoiding everypony else."

finally after a few minutes my food arrived, still thinking i managed to eat all of it.

"Its settled, i'm going to ask Twilight."

Applejack found herself selling apples in the town Plaza like she always did.

"Thank good sir, ah apriciate keep'en the change." Said Applejack as she put all the goods into the customers saddlebag. After she was done she went behind the carriage where she had all the apples and goods placed, she was looking at all the ponies walking around like always and then she noticed somepony familiar, she saw Loaf heading the way Twilights Library was, she decided to walk up to him just to make sure.

"Umm... Loaf?" she called put as she got behind him

"Yeah?" I asked as i turned around, to my surprise and luck it was Applejack.

"Ah reckon it would be you, ah would you, thanks heavens you're alright, i visited you quite a few times but couldn't go anymore, since i had alot of work to do in the farm." i felt honesty in her reply.

"Thanks Applesjack, can i ask you something?"

"Sure thing sugercube."

"Do you know where Fluttershy moved to?" I hope she knows.

"Yeah...well its for the best you go see her...she moved near Whitetail woods, about a week ago." She said

"Thanks...wait what do you mean its for the best?" I was intrigued by her answer.

"Well you, last week when she was visiting you, the doctors said that they were gonna have to disconnect you today, Fluttershy tried to reason with the but it was no use, she got real sad, we didn't know why, she never acted like that, much less with a pony she barely knew, but then she told us about you, how she has always liked you and has always had a crush on you."

"Wait... so she does like me?" I didn't mean to say that out loud.

"More then you could imagine sugercube." she relied

"Well then... i better get going." I said i felt a slice of real happiness for once in y life

"You better, last thing we want if for her to think you're dead."

"Thanks Applejack" I said as i began to trot away.

"Anytime sugercube." she said

I walked up to a small cottage near the woods, i trotted slowly to the door, gave a big breathe and knocked, after a few minutes there was no response. I heard some noises come from the back of the house so i followed them, when i got there i saw alot of animals but not Fluttershy, there was a dirt road that lead in thru the woods, i decided to follow it hoping it would lead to where Fluttershy was at, finally after a few minutes of walking i was standing in front of a lake, and at the edge i saw non other tha Fluttershy, she was sitting there looking at the lake.
I decided to get closer but when i was a few feet away i notcied she was crying, it a soft cry but then i remembered what Applejack said, she probably thought i was dead, finally i was right behind her, she still didn't notice i was there, and i did something i probably wouldn't have done in another situation, i reached her and gave a her a big hug, she got scared but she didn't stop crying nor did she look to see who it was.
"Dont't worry, i love you to much to leave you with you heartbroken." I whispered into her ear.
I guess she was shocked and happy to hear me and those words.

"L-Loaf?" she mumbled.

"Yes... i won't leave you don't worry." We stayed there for about an hour, not saying anything, i simply rubbed her back as she kept crying, out of saddness and joy at the same time, finally after she stopped she got up but didn't look at me.

"Loaf..." she said as she continued to gaze the lake.

"Yes?" i responded also gazing into the lake.

"Thank you..."

"Huh?" I turned over to see her but couldn't due to her hair.

"Thank you for not dieing and coming all the way over here..." she said not dropping her look from the lake.

"No, Fluttershy thank you, for visiting me all that time, for not being mad at me for the last few years...well that's what i like to think." I said, this time she didn't respond, she simpy started crying softly again. I couldn't bare with this, i got closer and hugged her again, but as i was wrapping my hands around her, she leaned in and kissed me, for the first time in my life i felt true love, it was the most passionate kiss i've ever had, i didn't even know how long we lasted kissing, finally i broke up the kiss and she simply looked at me with her cute tearful eyes, she was smiling like you couldn't imagine, this time i started crying but i also felt relifed, like if all my problems had banished that instance.

"Fluttershy...i-i'm so sorry for avoiding you for so long... i was so blinded by the darkness in y heart that I didn't let anypony show me a true saving light, i shoul've of hanged out more with you, i should've given you a chance since i first saw you...Fluttershy...i-i'm really sorry i didn't want any of this to happen, much less i didn't want to hurt you, thruth is... i've liked you since the first day i laid my eyes on you..." I felt like trash for letting all of this happen, putting a beautiful mare thru this kind of stuff, it just isn't fair.

"Loaf... Don't worry... that's the past...embrace the present..." She hugged me, it maid me feel secure, it showed that i was forgiven.

"I've tried... But everytime i try to forget, the memories come back...I just want to be happy... i want to forget, i want to live..." my voice kept trailing off, i needed to let everything out.

"Then let me help you... together we can overcome all those memories...just give me the chance, give somepony the chance to help you, thats all there is to it." She lifted my head, redirecting it so i could be looking at her.

"I want to...I want you to help me...thats all i want...happiness..." I couldn't bare but think how cute she looked, she was blushing by my words and that only made it better

"Well then...Let's get inside and talk some more." she got up and so did i, we both trotted back to her cottage to talk, it made me feel loved even more, which was what i needed

4 days later...

"Fluttershy, are you home?" I slolwy walked into her cottage, which had only but some of the animals she was taking care of. "Huh, i wonder where she is?" I looked around her house and her backyard, even the lake but she was no where to be found.

"HEY FLUTTERSHY!" Screamed Rainbow Dash as she landed a few meters away from her in the town plaza

"Oh! Hello Rainbow, i haven't seen you in a few days-" Fluttershy was cut early by Rainbow Dash who was beat by all the flying she had been doing.

"Is it true?" she said as fast as she could trying to regain her breathe.

"Um...What do you mean?"

"I mean is it true that Loaf woke up and that he isn't at the hospital anymore."

"Well yeah that's true, actually he wants to talk to you, you should go to his house." Fluttershy said as she started to head back to her house.

"Yeah i should..." Answered Rainbow Dash but she didn't want to, fearing that he wanted to talk to her to get revange for making him almost kill himself.

"Well you should drop by his house later, he would really like that." Fluttershy kept walking leaving Rainbow dash behind.

"I should... but... what if he doesn't quite want to say hello?" Thought Rainbow still wondering on her options.

Fluttershy entered her home and greeted all the animals that were running around in her house.
"Hello Angel, how are you doing?" Asked Fluttershy as she walked into the kitchen where a white rabbit was standing looking up at her.

"BOO!" Screamed Loaf as he flew down from the kitchen's ceiling

"ECK!" Screamed Fluttershy give a quick jump and covering her face with her hooves

"Don't worry, it's just me, sorry." Said Loaf as he extended his hoof towards Fluttershy to help her off the ground.

"Oh goodness i had forgotten you started flying again, you really gave me a big scare." Said Fluttershy as she got up from the floor.

"Well anyways i came to drop off a cake i made just for, with of course help from Pinkie Pie." Loaf pointed towards a two story cake that was sitting on the kitchen table.

"Oh Loaf it looks beautiful, and delicious." Fluttershy walked over to it, it had pink frosting and was decorated with Red fondat lines going from top to bottom and little purple circles in the bottom layer

"Only the best for the most beautiful mare in Equestria."Said Loaf walking up next to Fluttershy, who was now blushing due to Loaf's compliment.

"Oh you can't be serious..." Said Fluttershy as she turned away trying to hide her face from Loaf's sight.

"But its's the truth." Replied Loaf as he hugged Fluttershy, for the first time in a long time he was truly happy, since he woke up he hasn't even thought about hurting himself, and he was happy to be with Fluttershy, the one pony that has truly loved him and that would never hurt him no matter what.

Truth

HAPPY NEW YEARS!! Sorry for the short chapter but still I wanted to bring something out for the New Year. Enjoy!

Chapter 8

“Oh yeah!” Said Fluttershy as she remembered she had to tell Loaf that she saw Rainbow.

“What is it?” Answered Loaf as he turned his head to face her.

“I saw Rainbow Dash today.” She quickly answered.

“Really? Did you tell her that I wanted to talk to her?”

“Yeah I told her that she should stop by your house today.”

“Well, maybe it’s better if I go visit her; I feel she’s been avoiding me.”

“Do you know where she lives?”

“Um… well I was counting on you telling me.”

“Oh yeah no problem, she lives near the town hall, down a dirt road close to the Quilts and Sofas store, just fly up and you should see it in a big cloud.”

“Okay, thanks Fluttershy.” Said Loaf getting ready to leave but not before giving her a kiss in the cheek, that always made her blush and he loved it.

I was just meters away from reaching Rainbow’s house, I wasn’t sure if she would be there but I soon saw her flying in to her house thus confirming her presence, I finally reached the front door and knocked on it.

“Who is it?” I heard her ask from the other side.

“Loaf.” I answered.

“Um…There’s nobody home…go away!” I heard her yell from the other side of the door, then a door slamming, I figured she left thru some back door so I headed to the back of her house and saw that in fact there was no door nor window so I figured she maybe locked herself in her room so I headed to the front of the house again and located a window so I decided to fly up there, finally I looked thru the window and saw a big lump on the bed covered by sheets.

“Dash I know that’s you.” I said hovering outside her window.

“What do you want?” She said still covered in the sheets.

“I don’t know, what do you think I’m here for?” I answered hoping she would tell me why she hasn’t wanted to talk to me.

“Fine, you know what go ahead and get your revenge, I don’t even care anymore, come on give me the best you got!” She uncovered herself and stood up from the bed. I decided to fly in, and then I stood a few inches away from her face.

“Come on! What are you waiting for?” She said, a frown now formed on her face.

“Dash…I…I-I don’t know what to say.” There was so much tension right now, I could hardly handle it.

“Yeah right! I know what you want to say so just say it!” She was not completely yelling at me, but I began to lose my temper.

“WELL THEN TELL ME WHAT IT IS DAMN IT! I’M NOT A FUCKING MIND READER! SO PLEASE TELL ME WHAT THE HELL IT IS THAT I WANT TO TELL YOU!” I didn’t even notice I too was yelling but my words hit her hard because her eyes began to water.

“You… want to say something about me… how…how I’m a bad pony…bad friend… how I never listened to the truth…and how I drove you into wanting to suicide…about all the times I hurt you…” She had a hard time saying all this; she was hurt and afraid of what Loaf could do to her.

“How could I say that about one of my friends? Sure you hurt me some bit, but it wasn’t just you who drove me to wanting to suicide, Dash your my friend and I don’t care what mistakes you made with me, how many times you hurt me not only on a verbal level but on a physical and mental level, plus you weren’t the only pony to hurt a friend, I also hurt you in many ways, example putting you thru having to deal with me in an unconscious state when I was at the hospital, which by the way I’m glad you went and visited all those times.” At the end of my speech I got closer to her, she was holding back tears, I could tell by the way she had quickly moved her head towards the head.

“Dash, why would you think I want to hurt you?” I hugged her as tight as I could and she quickly did the same.

“Loaf I’m sorry. Sorry for everything, if only I would’ve known your past sooner I would’ve treated you differently.” She began sobbing but it quickly she began crying.

“Don’t worry Dash, everything is better now, I’ve changed and I no longer wish to harm myself or anypony else, I’m here to stay, I promise.” I felt her hug me tighter

“The truth is… I was worried for you… I didn’t want you to die, but when I heard that they were going to disconnect you… I nearly drove myself to suicide as well…” Her words shocked me heavily and I quickly pulled her away from me and looked at her in the eyes.

“Dash, no matter what happens to me, no matter who’s fault it was, don’t ever and I repeat don’t EVER hurt yourself, got that?” I was concerned for this stamen.

“Got…Got it.” She managed to say between sobs.

“Good, well I better get going I have to wake up early tomorrow.” I said letting out a small sigh.

“Yeah… Loaf… I’m really happy that you’re okay, that you don’t hate me…” Dash was whipping off some tears off her face.

“No problem, I’ll come by tomorrow to chat some more okay?” I said before flying of back to Fluttershy’s house, I was staying since I got out of the hospital.

“Yeah… I’ll be waiting.” Dash said as she waved at Loaf who was now flying back towards Fluttershy’s house, She was happy that everything was fine and that he was still her friend, she regrets having avoided him for so long since he left the hospital.

Harsh Farewells

I you enjoy, as I had a hard emotional time writing this chapter for you guys

Chapter 9: A longing favor.

It had been nearly two months since I woke up from my coma and everything has been going great, I’m with Fluttershy and I’ve been hanging out a lot with Rainbow Dash practicing some tricks, I’ve also helped the rest of the girls with whatever they needed, last week I helped Twilight with some spells and I help Rarity with a dress (yes I did forgive her for what she did) and this job at Sugercube Corner is one of the best jobs ever.

“Well let’s see what we have for mail today.” I said coming outside of my house to check the mailbox, it was my day off so I thought I head out and buy something for breakfast instead of making my own. “Junk, more junk. Huh? A letter from Spitfire, what could it be?” I thought before opening the letter to read it.

Dear Loaf,
I have great news for you, I’ve been talking around with the rest of the team and we found and opening due to one of our older members to have retired and well we can give your friend and audition for you friend today in the Canterlot flying arena at five o’clock. I’ve sent a transport so you don’t have to fly all the way over her, it should be at your house around 10 am.

Your Sister

Spitfire.

“Well that’s great!” I thought. “Only downside is that she didn’t tell me earlier, well better go tell Rainbow.” After placing the letter in my saddlebag I headed off to Dashes house.

I arrived at her doorstep and gave a knock on the door.

“Coming!” I heard from the other side of the door. “Oh hey Loaf, what’s up?” she said as she opened the door and greeted me.

“I got a little something for you.” I said pulling out the letter from my saddlebag and handing it to her.

“What is it?” She asked as she grabbed the letter.

“Just read it and find out.” I answered with a small smile on my face.
After a minute she finished reading the letter. “Oh my gosh, oh my gosh!” She said becoming very excited.

“So you ready to head off to Canterlot?” I said smiling back at her.

“Thank you, thanks you! This is the best thing anypony has done for me.” She said jumping on to me and hugging me.

“No problem, well I’m going to see if the other girls want to go, be at my house twenty-five minutes before 10 ok?” I said before flying off.

“Okay see you there!” She answered before rushing back inside her house.

“Okay is everypony ready.” I asked as I checked my watch, only five more minutes until we departed towards Canterlot.

“Oh this is going to be great, I can’t wait to see Canterlot again, I’m going to go pay a visit to my parents.” Said a rather excited Twilight.

“And I’m going to get to wear my latest creation to all the high class ponies, maybe they want one of their own.” Quoted Rarity.

“Wow this is really nice of you Loaf.” Said Fluttershy walking up to me.

“Well I figure I do this for a friend, especially since you all manage to help me change I decided to not only go with Rainbow Dash but also bring all of her friends, plus I’m sure if we don’t have enough time to sight see we can make a little arrangement with my sister to stay there a day longer.”

“That would be great; I just hope it isn’t too much of a drag to take all of us with you and Rainbow.” Answered Fluttershy looking back at her friends who were all talking about what they were going to do when they got there.

“Not at all, what’s a trip if all your friends can’t come? Well anyways I see the transport coming we better get ready.” I said seeing that we would be traveling by land. “Okay everypony get ready, we’re about to leave.” I said at the group standing behind me.

“Yay! I can’t wait to arrive and see Rainbow Dash show off her wicked moves!” Said Pinkie, hoping over to the cart that was now pulling up in the dirt road leading from my house to the rest of the town.

“Nervous?” I asked as I walked up to Rainbow Dash.

“What? Me? Oh Loaf don’t worry I’ve been training my whole life for this moment, I’m way more than ready to take on whatever they put in my way.” She gave out a few hoof gestures indicating the vast amount of stuff.

“Okay then, let’s get going.” I said pointing with my hoof towards the cart.

“Man that took some time.” I said getting off the transport.

“I know and it would’ve taken less if we’d not have gone through the mountains.” Answered and equally frustrated Applejack.

“Well there’s still about an hour left until my audition so we should probably get something to eat.” Rainbow Dash’s voice sounded more excited than frustrated from the trip.

“Yeah, I’m starving, we should go look for something cause I haven’t eaten since this morning and I really could use something delicious right now.” Pinkie Pie was bouncing around everywhere.

“Well I don’t know about you guys but I’m going to go pay a visit to my parents.” Said Twilight looking around the area.

“Oh I’ll come with you dear, that way I can show off my latest hat creation.” Rarity instantly offered to accompany Twilight.

“Well then I guess we should first agree on where and when to meet each other so we can head back to Ponyville.” I said before anypony headed off.

“Hm. How ‘bout 8 o’clock right here?” Applejack suggested.

“Sounds okay to me.”

“Same here.”

“Okay then it’s settled, 8 o’clock here…Wait where’s Fluttershy?” I hadn’t seen her get off when we got here.

“Oh there she is, she fell asleep on the way here.” Pinkie pointed at Fluttershy who was resting her head against the window, soundly asleep.

“Well better wake her up, she must be hungry as well.” I said before crawling up next to her and touching her shoulder to wake her. “Fluttershy, wake up, we’re in Canterlot already.”

“Huh? We’re here already?” She slowly began to wake up.

“Yeah come on; let’s go get something to eat.” I smiled at her; she looked really cute waking up.

“Oh, ok” She said before getting off.

“Okay then, see you guys later and Rainbow Dash, good luck.” Twilight said before trotting of to her parent’s house with Rarity walking behind her.

“See y’all later then.” Said Applejack waving her hat at them.

“This seems like a nice place to eat at.” Said Rainbow Dash looking at a restaurant with the name Chateau Bistro.

“Ah don’t know it looks to fancy.” Applejack didn’t seem to want to go in.

“It’s not, I’ve been here before.” I commented while looking at my watch.

“If you say so.” Applejack simply rolled her eyes while she followed Rainbow into the restaurant.

“You girls go and get the table; I’m going to go buy a new battery for my watch.” Great my watch died and I don’t like not know the right time.

“Want me to come with you?” Fluttershy offered me.

“Nah it’s okay I won’t take long, there’s a shop nearby, you and the other can go ordering while I get back.” I turned around to look at Fluttershy who still seemed a little tired form the trip.

“Okay then, don’t take too long.” She said before walking into the bistro.

“Hmm, it’s been a long time since I’ve seen you Loaf.” That voice, that unmistakable voice.

“Hello Ms.Heartbeam, I haven’t seen you in a long time.” I would’ve preferred not seeing her ever again, most off all why did she have to be here right outside the bistro?

“You haven’t changed a single damn bit have you?” She asked sarcastically

“I guess not.” Neither have you, you fat pig.

“I guess that means you’re still a failure at life?” She had the most horrid tone when talking to me.

“What now? I see you haven’t changed your ways on treating me.” I wasn’t going to last long, I could feel the memories coming back.

“Does it matter? Your whole life everybody has talked to you like I do.” She simply gave off an evil smirk.

“You know what’s funny? You were the only one that talked to me like that, mainly because you had the rest of the class scared shitlless as to ever confront you, but I guess that’s what made me a deviant, I never stayed quite, I would always confront your sorry ass.” Not this time, I wasn’t ready to fall and give in to her.

“I would appreciate if you would watch your language around me, I am after all a lady.” She said posing like if she were the 8th wonder of the world.

“Bullshit. Like if you ever watched your language around me, always calling me names and telling me I was crap. But you want to know something? I’m no longer that little foal and your no longer my shitty teacher. I can actually defend myself and tell you everything I’ve been holding back these years without having to worry about getting into trouble.” I hit her hard.

“So you’re saying all this to hide the fact that you tried to kill yourself recently? That you still don’t have a marefriend? That you’re still the little retarted foal from 6th grade? You’ll never hide you true self from me, I now you more than anypony; I know what you’re capable of. I can trigger your mind to do whatever I want you to do.” She gave off a horrid laugh, sadly she was right she knew what triggered my memories and she was on the edge of doing it

“SHUT UP!! JUST SHUT THE HELL UP!! Okay I’ve had enough, my life, my whole damn life was tormented by you! And I always had the slightest hope that it would all end, that’s what woke up in the mornings, the single hope that something would change and that everything would be better but instead my whole life was turned into shit by a single pony.” I couldn’t give into her mind tricks, not anymore.

“You called that life? You had nopony and you called that life? You truly are a sad little foal.” Here smirk didn’t leave her face one bit.

“STOP IT!! I DON’T CARE!! I don’t care what I did and didn’t… it was my life…” I felt and intense sadness take me over.

“And that’s why you still don’t have anything or anypony.” She simply said it as it were nothing.

“That’s what you think. Look over there what do you see?” I pointed at the bistro, thankfully Fluttershy was sitting next to it.

“Okay so I see the ex-model Fluttershy, so what?” She asked rather annoyed.

“That wonderful mare you see right there is my marefriend.” I said, this was sure to shut her up.

“Yeah right, you expect me to believe that an ex-model would date a poor looser like you? Nice try but I’m not buying it.”

“I no longer care what you have to say because I found a girl that has always liked me and I’m as happy as I can be, it was nice talking to you but I have more important things to do then stay here and waste my time with somepony that’s not even worth a second.” I didn’t even bother on listening to everything she was saying, I simply walked into the bistro and sat down next to the mare I loved, it felt great to let all that pressure and built up tension into the pony that caused it.

“Who was that pony you were talking to?” Fluttershy asked me, apparently she noticed.

“The pony that caused my whole life to go to waste when I was in 6th grade.” I said it as it were nothing, I looked outside to see her still standing there, now she believed that I knew Fluttershy.

“Oh she didn’t harm you did she?” Fluttershy became concerned, last thing she wanted was to see him decay into a depressed pony again.

“No, actually I put her in her place, I told her about how much she hurt me, but that I’m a lot better now.” I smiled at her before leaning to kiss her. This caused her to blush but she didn’t mind. After we I backed off I looked to the window and saw a furious pony biting her lower lip. “That’s the last time I’ll be seeing her” I thought to myself.

“Alright, we’ll be watching from the stands alright?” I said to Rainbow Dash, she looked so happy but at the same time a bit nervous.

“Yeah, oh I don’t know if I’ll be able to pull the tricks off correctly.” She said, she started to sweat a little bit.

“Don’t worry Sugercube, you’ll be just fine.” Applejack gave her a light nudge on her shoulder.

“Yeah, don’t worry; we’ll be cheering for you.” Fluttershy said giving off a smile.

“Okay then, wish me luck.” Rainbow Dash flew up to the arena, where Soarin and Spitfire were waiting.
“Oh I can’t wait to see all her tricks, she going to be all like SWISH!, ZOOM!, SWASH! And the Wonderbolts will be alike, Ohhh, Eee, Ahhh!” Pinkie said as we all sat down.

“Oh I just hope she doesn’t get to nervous.” Said Fluttershy worrying a little

“Oh hush, she’ll be just fine, there’s nothin Rainbow can’t handle.” Applejack said to the other ponies

“Hey where’s Loaf?” Fluttershy asked, she’d remember seeing him coming up to sit with them.

“I don’t know.” Applejack simply shrugged.

“Maybe he went to the little fillies room.” Suggested Pinkie.

“Oh I hope he is okay.” Fluttershy now becoming a bit more concerned.

“Ah don’t worry, I’m sure he is fine.” Applejack continued watching Rainbow Dash, who was doing fantastic.

“Oh Loaf there you are.” Said Fluttershy as she saw him coming to sit next to her. “Is something wrong?” She noticed he had a rather gloomy look on his face.

“Here, take this and don’t open it until you get to Ponyville.” I handed Fluttershy an envelope containing a letter.

“What happened where did you go?” She asked me again, this was hard enough as it was.

“Nowhere… just… let’s just continue on.” My voice was cracking, how do I explain what I can’t say?

“Oh…sorry.” Fluttershy decided to leave it at that, fearing to trigger him off at any moment.

“Loaf…” She thought while looking at him, he had a rather saddened look on his face now.

“So how did it go? Are you in? Did they like it?” Asked a rather accelerated Pinkie.

“Well they liked it a lot but they won’t have a proper response until tomorrow.” Rainbow Dash answered, she felt like that was enough for her.

“Okay then we better get back to Ponyville.” I said rather franticly.

“Oh so soon?” Twilight asked.

“Yes, I’m afraid we won’t be able to sight see like I wanted.

“But why?” Asked Rarity.

“We just have TO, okay? No more questions.” My voice was once again crackling up, but I had to stay strong.

“Okay… If you say so…” Fluttershy spoke for the rest of her friends.

“Okay then let’s go.” I was the first to get into the cart.

“Psst… What’s up with Loaf?” Twilight asked Fluttershy.

“I don’t know, he has been like this since we were in the arena, he disappeared and when he came back he was like this.” Fluttershy answered her friend’s question.

“Well here goes another two hours to cross these mountains.” Rainbow Dash commented.

“I know, it’s not like there is any noise to trigger an avalanche.” Rarity said also rather annoyed to have to spend two hours to cross.

“Yeah I kno-” Pinkie was cut off by a rather loud noise coming from above them, this also caused the cart to stop.
Everypony got out to see what the noise had been, to make it worse the noise was coming from and avalanche that was hurling towards them.
~~~
“Everypony quickly! Into the cave!” I instructed with the top of my lungs.
There was havoc due to all the falling rocks and boulders. It was a real disaster but thankfully everypony made it inside.

“Oh my! Is everypony okay?” Twilight asked.

“I’m fine.”
“Same here.”
“Loaf where are you?” Fluttershy called out, there wasn’t much light but Rarity and Twilight quickly used their horns to light up the room

“Over…Here…” I felt an intense pain coming from the left side of my body.

“Okay, we have to find a way out before the whole mountain comes down on top of us.” Twilight quickly suggested.

“There a way over here!” Rainbow Dash Pointed out a passage.

“Okay everypony quick go!” I commanded, still overtaken by the pain, thankfully nobody has noticed.
After a few minutes of running the mountain started to give in, there were rocks falling everywhere but the exit drew closer and closer but the pain also grew.

“Argg.” I yelled out of pain before collapsing onto the ground I hadn’t actually had time to examine the wound, sadly it was a about 8 inch gash that was bleeding heavily.

“What’s wrong? Come on Loaf we’re almost out. Come on!” Fluttershy begged stopping next to me.

“Fluttershy…I’m…I’m not.” I could feel the pain starting to take over my whole body.

“Come on…Please we’re almost out.” Fluttershy began to cry the whole situation was to much.

“I can’t…Fluttershy…You’ve got to know that I’ve always loved you…”

“NO! Don’t say that! Please just hang in there, there still time.” She finally saw the wound.

“We…We can’t lie to ourself Flutter…We both now that it’s all to late already…”

“NO! THERE IS STILL TIME!” It was the first time she had ever talked back to anypony like that.

“Fluttershy look at me!” I managed to grab her face while I sat up next to a rock, she was crying heavily.
“We both know the end to this story… Just promise me that you’ll remember me…That you’ll move on no matter what…I’m glad…You forgave me for my stuborness” Everything began to darken.

“No…no ,no, no…Just move…move… there is still time…” She was uncontrollable.

“No Fluttershy… There isn’t damn it… And even if there was time, I still wouldn’t make it.” I said

“NO!” She yelled at the top off her lungs before grabbing me and flying off as fast as she could to the exit, a few feet before the exit she fell to the floor, exhausted.
“Come on Loaf…Just a few more steps…” She said hope but she thought otherwise.

“Fluttershy…Look at me…We’ll meet again I promise…You’ve got to promise that when we meet again…You’ll know that it’s me…And when we do…We’ll live happily, we’ll get married, we’ll grow together.” I managed to get up and walked over to her.

“I promise…I’m sorry…” She burst into tears like never before, but with my last bits of strength I gave her one last passionate kiss and pushed her outside before the rocks tumbled down onto my body

“I love you.” Was the last thing I heard her sweet voice tell me.

“NO!” Fluttershy screamed as she witness the scene right in front of her, her friends holding her back.
“LET GO! I HAVE TO GET HIM OUT!” She didn’t want to believe the sad truth.

“Calm down Sugercube! It’s done! He is gone.” Applejack said holding her back; finally Fluttershy admitted defeat and just lay there, crying.
Everypony just sat there, witnessing the facts and thinking about what had just happened, often bursting into tears and leaning into each other for comfort.