Rainbow Dash Writes a Fanfic

by chibiachika

Rating: teen
Tags: Daring Do, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Comedy
Length: 3201

Rainbow Dash decides to write a Daring Do fanfic. It goes about as well as you'd expect.

Having recently become a fan of the "Daring Do" series, Rainbow Dash decides that she should try her hoof at writing one. Will her new dream of becoming a world-renowned author come true?

There are four different finales to this fic, each one an alternate version of the others. I figured I'd have a little fun with this!

Can you name all the random references? ^_^

Published 2012-06-07 01:14:02 UTC
Last updated 2014-12-12 19:44:23 UTC

Daring Do and the Lost Treasure of Ifnkovhgroghprm

Daring Do had just dismissed her class at Mareshall College. She found teaching to be a great way to relax after her adventures, but the itch for adventure was constant in her life. Her wing was broken once again though, so she knew she had to rest.

As she was leaving the classroom, from the corner of her eye, she saw the most awesome pegasus that went to the college. “Rainbow Dash, why are you still here?”

“Professor Do, I heard that you go on adventures a lot, and I want to go with you on your next one!” Rainbow Dash said.

Daring Do shook her head. “I could never take one of my students. It’s too dangerous.”

“Please?”

“Okay, you can come.”

“I already packed my stuff!” said the cool pegasus.

“Let me grab my hat and we can go.” Daring Do trotted out of the room, excited to be going on a new adventure with an awesome partner.

Rainbow Dash flew above Daring Do, who was on the ground due to her latest wing injury. Daring Do was having trouble cutting through some of the brush of the jungle. “Do you want me to carry you?” asked Rainbow Dash.

“That would be good, thanks. I’m glad that I brought you along.” the adventurer said as she was lifted up.

“Oh no, it’s Ahuitzotl!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed as she watched the beast emerge from the shadows.

“Well if it isn’t Daring Do! And I see you have such an awesome guest with you!”

“We’ll never let you get the lost treasure of Igrofnkovhghprm!” yelled Rainbow Dash.

“You act like you have a choice in the matter!” Ahuitzotl laughed as his vicious attack cat companions attacked the duo. They were then taken to the Temple of Ifnkovhgroghprm and tied to a stone platform.

“This time, you will truly meet your end!” laughed Ahuitzotl as he left with the treasure.

A swinging blade was swinging over the pair as water started to fill the room. “Oh no, this looks like it will truly be the end. I’m sorry Rainbow Dash, I did not want to put you in danger because I love you.” cried Daring Do.

“I love you too Daring Do! That is why I wanted to be with you! I knew you liked your adventures so I wanted be with you on them! I will not let it end like this!” Rainbow Dash wiggled in her ropes as her wings spread open, slicing the ropes apart. She then turned to her new lover and they kissed as the awesome hero sliced the ropes holding Daring Do.

“We must get out of this room before we drown! The only way out is through this door!” Daring Do ran over to the door and gasped. “Oh no, there is a puzzle on here! This ancient script is unfamiliar to me!”

“You should be glad that you brought me along, because I have already deciphered it! It says that if we want to escape in time, we need to push in the tile that has the picture of the timepiece on it!”

“What!? But the clock that is engraved on here covers four tiles! We will certainly die if we press the wrong one!” Daring Do started to cry.

“This is really simple! It’s this one!” Rainbow Dash pushed her hoof against a tile in the upper left. The door started to slide open.

“How did you know that was the right one?” Daring Do questioned as she hugged her savior tightly.

“You were right that the clock was engraved on four tiles, but what you didn’t notice was the hourglass that was engraved on this tile!”

“It’s no wonder you’re passing all of your classes with perfect grades! I’m amazed that you’re able to do that and still be the top athlete on campus!”

“Now we have to go stop Ahuitzotl and recover the lost treasure of Ifnkovhgroghprm!”

“With Rainbow Dash and Daring Do out of the way, nothing will stop me from the conquest of Equestria!” laughed Ahuitzotl as he sat on his throne in his fortress. He fell to the ground as a rainbow-colored blue struck him. “Rainbow Dash! How did you escape from my deathtrap?”

“It was easy! Now give us the lost treasure of Ifnkovhgroghprm and I won’t have to do something you’ll regret!”

“You may have beaten me this time, but your lover will never adventure again!” Ahuitzotl laughed as Daring Do screamed. An arrow was sticking out of her knee. As Rainbow Dash ran over to her, Ahuitzotl made his escape, leaving behind the lost treasure of Ifnkovhgroghprm.

“Rainbow Dash, I’m afraid that I can no longer be an adventurer! A broken wing is able to be worked around, but an arrow to the knee is the end of the adventurer’s life! I can’t believe that our first adventure together will also be our last! My love, will you continue my life’s work?” Daring Do cried.

“Of course! How could I say no?” Rainbow Dash smiled as Daring Do removed her hat and placed it on top of the awesome rainbow-maned pegasus. “I will be off on my first solo adventure as soon as you heal up, my dear Daring Do. Now let’s go home. I have a surprise waiting for you there.”

And then they had sex.

Twilight's Review

Twilight stared in horror at the pages before her. “Daring Do and the Lost Treasure of Igrofnkovhghprm” was far from being as good as Rainbow Dash had led her to believe. But how could she politely tell her friend how she felt? She’s seen clopographic movies with a better story.

“Twi, you’ve been really quiet for a few minutes. Is there something wrong?” the cyan pegasus frowned. She’d never written anything before, but she was proud of her work. She was certain that Twilight would find it great too.

“Well, it’s..”

“What are some of the good qualities?”

The unicorn scratched her head for a couple moments. “Well...I think I like the part where..well, you spelled Ahuitzotl correctly.”

“It was just a little odd, I picked up the book to find it the first time! Once you get used to it, it’s pretty easy!”

“Also, was it you that used all my hint coins in my copy of Professor Layhoof and the Unwound Future?”

“Yeah, hope you don’t mind. Some of those puzzles were kinda hard.”

“That was the fourth puzzle!”

“And it was hard! Okay, how about something bad? We can switch between the two if that makes it easier!”

“What I didn’t like...” Think, Twilight! You can’t hurt your friend’s feelings, no matter what you really want to say! “...well, this isn’t related to your plot necessarily, but did you use a typewriter?”

“Yeah, my parents had an old one that they let me borrow! Why do you ask?”

“I think there might be something wrong with it. Your letters are all coming out weird. Maybe I can help you with fixing it up!”

“That would be so awesome of you, Twilight! I’ll go get it right now!” Rainbow Dash darted out of the library.

Twilight sighed. She was about to do something she should never do. Rainbow Dash might not forgive her for it, but even the Elements of Harmony wouldn’t be able to fix up this poor attempt. Twilight knew one thing: Rainbow Dash could never be allowed to write a fanfic again.

“I’m back!” the cyan pegasus flew through the door, holding the typewriter. Twilight levitated it over to her.

“Oh yes, I see the problem! And this is an easy fix!”

“Awesome!" Rainbow Dash started to fly around the room in her excitement. "I’m already itching to write my next story once I get back to Cloudsdale! It’s going to be another one starring me and Dar-” She paused at the loud crunch sounding near her. Under her friend’s hooves lay the shattered remains of her typewriter. It was then levitated up to the shocked pegasus.

“Sorry, Rainbow...I guess it slipped. I am so sorry.” Twilight smiled faintly, which hiding the party her inner emotions were holding.

“Oh...It’s okay...I mean, you have typewriters in the library, right?”

“Oh no, they were much too noisy! I mean, there’s a reason I have Spike write my letters to Celestia!”

“Well, I guess I could probably ask around town. I’m sure somepony has one!”

“Oh, I bet somepony does! Tell you what, I’ll go ask around for you!”

“Thanks Twilight, I have to head to work now anyways. I’ll stop by tomorrow and see if you found one!” Rainbow Dash smiled as she walks out the door.

Rainbow Dash yawned as she walked out of her house the following morning. She picked up the newspaper on her porch, and glanced to see what the headlines were. “That’s odd. It looks like this was hoof-written.”

“All throughout Equestria, typewriters have been destroyed by an unknown vandal. Police are baffled as to how or why the criminal seemed to target the device that is owned by a majority of the population.”

“That’s really odd.” Rainbow Dash sighed. “I guess I won’t be writing anymore...”

Luna's Review

Twilight stared in horror at the pages before her. “Daring Do and the Lost Treasure of Igrofnkovhghprm” was far from being as good as Rainbow Dash had led her to believe. But how could she politely tell her friend how she felt? She’s seen clopographic movies with a better story.

“Twi, you’ve been really quiet for a few minutes. Is there something wrong?” the cyan pegasus frowned. She’d never written anything before, but she was proud of her work. She was certain that Twilight would find it great too.

“So what do you think?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Well...it’s...Oh! You know who would love to see this?”

“Who?”

“Princess Luna! She’s recently started reading the Daring Do series herself!”

“Wow, cool! I bet she’ll love it!”

“Spike, take a letter.” The baby dragon groggily rose from his bed, grabbing quill and parchment. “Dear Princess Luna, I know how much you’re enjoying the Daring Do series, and my friend Rainbow Dash has written her first fanfic based on the series! Enclosed is a copy of her story. We are both eagerly awaiting your response. Your loyal subject, Twilight Sparkle.”

“It’s not often that you send letters to Princess Luna.” Spike said as he was handed the pages of Rainbow Dash’s fanfic. He took a deep breath, and the flames engulfed the letter and the story, disappearing out the window with a puff of green flame.

A few hours had passed since the letter was sent. Twilight was starting to worry about Luna. Her mental state was still a bit fractured from her imprisonment, but she had improved so much. Twilight hoped she didn’t cause Luna to lose progress on recovering.

Then again, she had also sent the letter during the daytime. She wasn’t entirely certain how the princesses handled their duties. When she was still being taught by Celestia, the goddess of the sun often seemed tired due to handling both transitions. Maybe Luna was only awake at night. If that was the case, she should be waking up around now. The sun’s almost set.

Storm clouds started to form over Ponyville. “What the? There isn’t supposed to be a storm in Ponyville for another week!” Rainbow Dash looked upwards, towards a descending shadow.

“Princess Luna! You’ve come to visit us personally! Did you re-” Twilight Sparkle was cut off by the commanding voice.

“SILENCE, TWILIGHT SPARKLE!”

“Princess, we talked about this. You don’t need to use the Royal Canterlot Voice anymore.”

“NAY, FOR THIS IS AN IMPORTANT DECREE FROM YOUR PRINCESS OF THE NIGHT!”

A wide grin appeared on Rainbow Dash’s face. “Twilight, she must have liked it so much that she wants everypony to read it!”

“CITIZENS OF PONYVILLE! BY ORDER OF THE ROYAL COURT OF CANTERLOT, THE PEGASUS KNOWN AS RAINBOW DASH SHALL NO LONGER BE ALLOWED TO PEN NARRATIVES OF ANY FORM! THAT IS ALL!”

As the form of Luna disappeared into the rising moon, Rainbow Dash and Twilight Sparkle stood there, their mouths agape.

“Did...Did she just...?” the pegasus was too stunned to finish her sentence.

“I think...she just...You know what? Let’s forget this whole thing ever happened. Except the part where you’re not allowed to write stories anymore. You should probably remember that part.”

Cadance's Review

Twilight stared in horror at the pages before her. “Daring Do and the Lost Treasure of Igrofnkovhghprm” was far from being as good as Rainbow Dash had led her to believe. But how could she politely tell her friend how she felt? She’s seen clopographic movies with a better story.

“Twi, you’ve been really quiet for a few minutes. Is there something wrong?” the cyan pegasus frowned. She’d never written anything before, but she was proud of her work. She was certain that Twilight would find it great too.

“So what do you think?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Well...it’s...Oh! You know who would love to see this?”

“Who?”

"The pony that got me into this series in the first place! Princess Cadance! It was the first non-magical book I read, but it was still so so magical! I'll send it to her right away!" Twilight lifted the stack of papers into a large envelope, and placed it in the mailbox, lifting the flag on the side.

Rainbow Dash's excitement grew as she heard that a train from the Crystal Empire was coming today! She flew over the train station, and landed next to Twilight and Spike. "You expecting her to be on the train?"

"I hope so, I at least know my B.B.B.F.F. Is going to be on it! Oh, here it is!"

The crystal train seemed darker than usual, nearly black. The crystal train took the color represented by the hearts and feelings of the passengers. This was not a good sign. If the train was like this, what happened?
À
As the train came to a slow, a crashing noise was heard from a window towards the rear, and a stocky white stallion with a blue mane tumbled across the rough patch to the side. Twilight's eye widened as she realizes that the falling pony is her dear brother.

"Shining Armor! What happened!?" Twilight shouted as she raced towards him.

"I...I don't know..." Shining Armor rubbed his head. "Ever since Cadance received something in the mail a few days ago, she's been acting insane! She said that we're now divorced by royal order! And..." He shrunk back as Princess Cadance stepped off the train, her eyes flaring with dark magic.

"Twilight Sparkle! You have just declared WAR with the Crystal Empire! I never want to see you or anyone from your family again! I thought you were smarter than that, former sister-in-law!"

"Hey Princess Cadance! Did you like my fanfic!?" shouted Rainbow Dash with her usual excitement.

"YOU!? You wrote that travesty!? Something so horrible, the citizens of my empire would rather King Sombra rule over them than having to read this a second time!?" Cadance glowered at her.

"Yeah, I thought it was pretty awes-" Rainbow Dash was cut off as dark magic encapsulated her. Her pleas for help went unanswered, and screams could be heard as the cocoon shattered, nothing remaining where it once was.

"The world just became 20% cooler, now that the worst war criminal in Equestria has been defeated!" Cadance laughed sinisterly as she reboarded the train.

Author's Note

I was really bored, and decided that we might as well get the last princess to review it! Even though Twilight wasn't a princess when I wrote this.

The Writer and the Reader

“TWILIGHT! Twilight!” the cyan pegasus slammed open the library’s door.

“What’s wrong, Rainbow Dash? Did something happen?” Twilight had dropped the book she was reading at all the commotion.

“I just had this AWESOME idea and I need some help!” A grin was spread across her face.

“I told you before, I don’t know near as much about aerodynamics as the pegasi do. I know some basics, but I can’t tell you if your stunts are realistic!”

“What? No! This isn’t about stunts! This is more your line of work!”

“Magic? Studying?”

“I’m going to write a story!”

“Well, good luck with that! I’m sure I can find you some materials on writing a good one. First thing you’ll need are a general idea of plots, characters...”

“Daring Do!”

“What?”

“I’m going to write a Daring Do story!”

“Okay, what that’s called is ‘fanfiction.’ It means that you’re writing a story based on pre-existing characters from some form of media. In this case, you’re writing based on characters from the ‘Daring Do’ series.”

“Would you take a look at it when I’m done? I want to submit it to the publishers. My story will be so awesome that they’ll have to make me into a full-time writer!”

Twilight sighed. “I’m probably going to regret this, but okay, I’ll read your story when you’re done.”

“Thanks, Twi! I’ll owe you one!” Just as fast as she had arrived, the rainbow blur took off.

Celestia's Review

Twilight stared in horror at the pages before her. “Daring Do and the Lost Treasure of Igrofnkovhghprm” was far from being as good as Rainbow Dash had led her to believe. But how could she politely tell her friend how she felt? She’s seen clopographic movies with a better story.

“Twi, you’ve been really quiet for a few minutes. Is there something wrong?” the cyan pegasus frowned. She’d never written anything before, but she was proud of her work. She was certain that Twilight would find it great too.

“So what do you think?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Well...it’s...Oh! You know who would love to see this?”

“Who?”

“Spike, take a letter.” The baby dragon groggily rose from his bed, grabbing quill and parchment. “Dear Princess Celestia, my friend Rainbow Dash has recently discovered that reading is a fun hobby to have, and not just for ‘eggheads’ as she thought. She has also discovered another hobby relating to that, the writing of fanfiction. She hopes that she can become an author on the series one day. I’ve enclosed a copy of her story, if you want to see it for yourself. Maybe you can get a word in to the publishers? Your faithful student, Twilight Sparkle.” She handed her assistant a copy of the story. “Make sure she gets this too!” Spike took in a deep breath, as he exhaled his flame and sent the message on its way.

After a few minutes of waiting, Rainbow Dash broke the silence. “I hope she likes it! I’m sure that anything she would say to the publishers, they would have...to...listen...what the?” Rainbow Dash stood up, looking into the starry sky. “Where did the library go? And wasn’t it daytime?” She took a few steps forward and tumbled into a chasm. As she picked herself up, a blue and green sphere in in the ocean of stars caught her eye...