Some people say that wounds heal, that they can be forgotten, that they will vanish some day. Well, those who say that ain't' got enough of them. Some things just won't go away, memories will haunt you for the rest of your life and beyond. That's just how it works; you will take decisions, and then, you will have to bear the consequences, no matter what they are. You have to make sure you can live with your choices...
I was born in a forgotten place called Naquir. Located on the edge of Equestria, just at the limit between the world of ponies and the unknown. It was fifteen years ago, when there was still so much to be explored, when the unknown lands around Equestria still frightened its inhabitants, where people use to believe that creatures of the dark roamed these forbidden territories. Of course, those were nothing but superstitions, as I lived there and the only thing scary about this place was the smell coming out from the dump next door.
My name is Shadoww. This is not my real name, but a code that was given to me once I entered the organization O.R.A.C.L.E., its an interesting acronym, it stands for : Order of the Restless Alpha Clan charged of Liquidation and Extermination... I wasn't the one who came up with that idea, no, it was Tremor, our leader.
I never knew somepony so selfless, so devoted to killing, so filled with rage. He was the king of this mercenary organization and ruled over it with strength and power. But how did it came to this, you ask? Well, it all started when Princess Luna was banished to the moon by her sister. After that, Princess Celestia was overflowed with more and more responsibilities. First, she had to rise the moon in addition to the sun, she also had to rule over her subjects at the same time, she even had to give the responsibility of creating the rainbows to the pegasi, and you do not want to know how that turned out...
It was during this period of chaos that this organization was created, first by ponies lost in a world where only chaos ruled, others just because they hated somepony else. Killing isn't that hard, and after a few years of training and brainwashing, we could turn anyone into a brainless killer, that was half true for me... Over the years the organization grew bigger and bigger, accumulating more and more devoted people, establishing more and more hiding spots all around Equestria. After ten years it had already become a massive mercenary network. Either the operations would consist of people outside of the organization asking us to get rid of somepony, or we would start our own missions for our benefits. For people that weren't part of the group, the prices were astronomically high, the more money given, the more experienced the killer employed for the job would be.
We had the best killers, the best of the best, and opposite to what you might think, we didn't kidnap people and force them to enter, no, our ways were a lot more, hmm... what is the word... oh, yes, underhanded. The ponies, they came by themselves, just like I said: some were adult filled with rage and wanted to show to the world what they were worth, others were young ponies that didn't have any future or ambitions, that was my case...
When I was born, I was left behind by selfish parents, their actions finally costing them their life. After this tragic event, I was given to some other pony I didn't even know, he was supposed to raise me... hehe, he never could do anything right, I hope that this fucker is dead now. At the age of twelve, I ran away and searched for a purpose in my life; I would spend nights in the cold, hungry, desperate. In my journey, I traveled towards the center of Equestria, in the hope of finding a job, but whenever I told anypony that I was from the 'forbidden lands' I was thrown right back on the streets... And that is how, one of these nights, I encountered a pony in a dark alley, he came to talk to me and proposed me a 'job'. He told me it would be hard but that I would be trained, he told me I would be with other ponies and that I wouldn't have to worry about food, money or where to sleep. He told me I would be happy... You can say what you want, but no one in my situation would have refused such proposition. And without knowing it, I had gotten myself a one-way ticket to hell...
All those thoughts were rushing through my head while I was still sitting on the floor. I couldn't have imagined the most secured, anti-magic prison in Canterlot better: cold, hard, unwelcoming and... rotten. But that was the last of my worries. This was no first time for me; I was used to that kind of situation. All I had to do was wait for that one letter that would get me out of here. But not this time. I knew what I had done, and there was no turning back. Today had been... a long day. Tears were dripping off my eyes, and I would still sob uncontrollably for a few seconds before I could breathe correctly again. I had never felt such pain, far greater than anything I've ever experienced before, and I was a killer! Hmm... You want to know what happened to me so badly? How things took such a tragic turn? How did I break? Well... to the point where I am, I think I hit rock bottom, so... why not. This is the story of how I slowly turned into a merciless killer and how I was charged with destroying friendship itself.
Some people will tell you to forget your past, but how could I forget the atrocities that I have done, how could I forget the screams of agony, how could I forget everything... I have met a lot of creatures in my life, some were ponies, others were from different parts of Equestria, but they all had something in common... They never saw the sun again.
"Hey Shad' ! Heard Tremor wants to see ya. Got any idea what its about ?"
A familiar pony trotted towards me and started walking next to me. I had barely paid attention to his remark, I admit. I was lost in my thoughts. Lost in my own world, the only quiet and peaceful place left in me.
"Probably another mission, heh, It'll be good spending some time outside this shit hole." I said
Outside... it's been a while. Since my last 'assignment', I had been redirected to this secret underground campus near the crystal mountains. But to be honest, It was more like a very poorly designed school trip camping facility... Things hadn't been going to well for O.R.A.C.L.E. lately... especially since twelve of our agents had been caught in the crystal empire. It was suppose to be a routine mission, a joke for such experimented ponies. They were infiltrated successfully but for some unknown reason, they got caught. There might have been a traitor with them, but I doubt it. They were all captured, interrogated and then, all executed...
O.R.A.C.L.E. hadn't been as discrete as it could have been lately, but Tremor knew what he was doing. Losing a dozen of our agents might have been a big hit, but we always got back up after a fall. 'What kills you makes you stronger', that's what he always said to the ones that were doubting the power of O.R.A.C.L.E..
I was walking a long side a pony I had met a few years back, on my second mission, I believe. We had both been sent to deal with an undesired big mouth that lived close to Appleloosa. We had so much fun. It was a really memorable bounding experience. Killing the guy had been easy, I could say we had a natural talent, after this, we were both pretty prestigious, I mean, we were only thirteen... The name of this pony was Crimson, Crimson mask. He was a strong and tall black furred stallion that had to join the organization at roughly the same time as me. Tremor said he had a really good physiological condition and would fit in no problem.
When I entered myself, things were a bit different... I didn't want to do this, I didn't want to kill all those poor ponies, I almost got killed myself for not cooperating. But Tremor saw my potential and protected me. In the end, I got used to it, at first it was hard, almost impossible, I thought I wasn't made for this... and I really wasn't. But after some time, it became easier, it even felt... fun. It might take somepony merciless to kill, but there is nothing like a good brainwash to take away any form of resistance or doubt away.
Today, it was nutritive vegetables on the menu... I hated that stuff, I hated everything in this facility. I was hoping that the mission that Tremor had in mind for me would be my last here. But, now that I think about it, it was the first time he had asked only a single agent for a meeting, the missions I had been assigned to always included other recruits, more or less experimented... I took one of the remaining trays and presented it to the canteen pony, a green-skinned stallion so thin that if threatened, he could just hide in the wall's cracks. I got served, followed by Crimson. We both sat down at an available table. There were about fifty other ponies eating with us. This entire campus probably sheltered at least five hundred agents, from newbies to very experimented. There was a lot of noise...
I ate the food slowly, thinking about what that mission would be, and who would I had to deal with. Crimson didn't have all those worries or thoughts, no, for him, the killing was normal, he took great pleasure in practicing his methods and teaching them to others. He had a particular style of... how could I say it... Oh, yea : "busting in the front guarded door with a motorized twin turbine chemically powered engine Jeep and then blowing everything up"... I had a more sneaky and infiltration style of attack. I liked to fool my enemies, trying to gain their trust, slowly but surely, and then, when the moment is right, I would strike, leaving no traces behind.
"Hey man, what are you thinking'bout ?"
I swallowed the remaining food in my mouth and raised my head, looking at Crimson.
"Nothing... I just am a little anxious about the mission, I can't really say I'm nervous or excited, but I am sure curious about this." I said
"I'm sure it is going to be something big. Anyway, you won't forget to tell him to transfer me too after your mission ?" Crimson said, with a pleading look on his face
"Sure" I replied
I had barely touched anything in my plate. It didn't matter anyway. We both got up and walked out of the canteen. It was time for me to meet with Tremor. This place was a real labyrinth, but luckily, I still remembered the way to Tremor's Throne room from all the time we took me there to report my failures... After waving bye at Crimson, I walked down a few familiar corridors, stopping to say hi to some of my "associates". I arrived in front of an elevator, the big metal doors opened in a very slow manner, I got in and pressed the button for the third underground. When I arrived, I showed my mission assignment order to two guards. They looked at each other, puzzled, but finally let me pass. It was finally time, my heart was beating fast. I had to wait in a small room lacking in any kind of decoration or color, just like the rest of this damn place
