“I’ve never been here before.” You say, walking next to the small pink pony as she bounces and skips with surprising height.
“Yeah it’s great! I mean, once you leave Ponyville for the first time it’s so SURPRISING, I mean WOAH! There’s cool people and neat parties going on all the time and they make special drinks that make your party even MORE fun!” You look over at Pinkie Pie, who is now intently struggling to put on a party hat.
“Wait, drinks as in alcohol or something?” Pinkie Pie rolled her eyes at you, snapping her party hat on with an elastic smack.
“Well I don’t know what’s IN them silly billy, I just know that it’s really tasty and GREAT for parties! One time I was at a party with Berry Punch and one of the Royal Guards…”
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“…And that’s why I don’t eat spinach anymore!” If you seem uncomfortable, Pinkie doesn’t notice.
“Well, that’s quite a story Pinkie.” You say, scratching your head. ‘I wonder what happened to the banana?’ Shaking your head, you realize Pinkie Pie has already gone inside what looks to be a dilapidated shack. Taking care not to disturb the wheelbarrow near the door, you see inside that it is in fact, a dilapidated shack. “Uhhh, hey Pinkie? I don’t think we’re at the right place.” Pinkie smiled extra wide at you.
“Of course we’re in the right place! Follow me!” You follow Pinkie Pie down into the basement, watching the tiny pink pony bounce her way down the steps, and into the basement.
The basement was completely packed with ponies, engaged in dances or sitting down to drink and relax. Big MacIntosh sat off in the corner with Carrot Top and Junebug who seemed to be competing for his attention. Fluttershy was dancing in a very constrained way alongside Twilight Sparkle, who seems to be having a blast (or a seizure).
“Well, whatdaya think, huh?” You look around, suitably impressed.
“This is awesome Pinkie. But why is it a big secret?” Pinkie Pie thinks for a minute, then her face lights up again with an answer.
“Oh! Because we aren’t supposed to let the fillies know about this place, it’s only for grown ponies. So shhhhhhh! Oh, wait, how old are you? Would you still be a colt by human standards? Oh NO! What if I ruined everything?” You give Pinkie a pat on the shoulder, or at least what you assume a pony’s shoulder is.
“Pinkie, it’s fine, I’d be considered a stallion by now. So this is uh…” Behind you, Berry Punch slumps to the ground for a moment before getting back up to pour another glass of what looks to be wine. “So this is kind of like a pony bar then. That’s really cool Pinkie, thanks for bringing me!” Pinkie began jumping up and down again, ending her series of bounces with a hug.
“Yay! I’m so glad you like it! Oooh ooh ooh there’s Mrs. Cake! I have to go tell her about my new recipes, see you soon!” Pinkie Pie bounced away in her usual skipping fashion, leaving you with the smell of candy and latex balloons on your shirt. What a nice pony.
Walking over to the bar, you sit down and order an apple cider, glad to have finally found some form of alcohol in Equestria. When it arrives, you lean back and listen to the sounds around you, catching snippets of conversation here and there:
“…And then she said that I was supposed to bring the frosting!” “The nerve.”
“Thanks for dancing with me Fluttershy, I know it’s not your thing…”
“…And that’s how I got my cutie mark!”
“Eeeyup.”
“And she’s such a high status pony, ordering MY furniture, I still can’t believe it…”
“Uh, sir? Two bits.”
“Oh, sorry about that.” You fish the coins out of your pocket and sip your beverage. “Oh, excuse me. Is there any alcohol in this?” The barpony looks at you oddly.
“Well of course. 2% alcohol, top of the line!” You aren’t quite sure what face you made, but you hope it came across as a smile.
“Ah. Yes. Quite. Thank you.” The pony shuffles away to tend to another customer and you sigh a little into your drink before staring at it intently. “Two percent.”
“Yeah, I know. Ain’t much of a drink now, is it?” You look over to see an orange pony on the seat next to you, her yellow mane in a braid over her shoulder. “Now my Grandpappy used to be the real deal, back in the days of moonshine. His applewisky would blast your tail clean off! Oh.” She looked down at your butt and smirked a little. “Looks like you wouldn’t have to worry then sugarcube.” You start to take offense, but her disarming way of poking fun at you isn’t anything to get riled up over.
“I’m sure it was good stuff, probably a bit strong for most ponies though.”
“Sure as shootin’!” Applejack clapped you on the back with her hoof hard enough to leave you wheezing. “Oh, sorry there partner. But lemme tell you something, any real Apple can drink my grandpappy’s whiskey; heck we grow up with the stuff!” Looking over at Applejack, you recognize that she’s already a little drunk… “We’ve been champion drinkers of this town for decades!” …and a little prideful.
“Uh… huh. Well I’m sure that you’re quite the drinker Miss Applejack, but I’m sure you’ve had some ponies give you a run for your money. Heck, maybe I could.” Applejack grinned and leaned in close, the smell of apple cider on her breath.
“Well then why not make this a competition?”
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Two shot glasses were brought out and set down on the table you and Applejack had moved to. Fluttershy presided as judge, and a bottle of the famed Applewhiskey was brought to the table. Berry Punch could be heard taking bets in the background.
“Um, okay. I would like a nice clean match, no tricks. Um, you have to match drinks with the other pon- with the other um, competitor. First one not to match loses. I think that’s everything…” Fluttershy let out a small squeak as the barpony dinged the bell signifying the start of the match. You poured out a shot for yourself and for Applejack, and with a quick clinking of the glasses you down yours. ‘Well that’s not so bad; it’s almost like a lager.’ Applejack with a single cough set down her glass and stared at you intently.
“Lookin’ to back out yet?” You smile back and set your glass back down.
“Not by a long shot.”
Now from what you remember, equines in general can handle their liquor. Hell, the guy who invented the philosophy of stoicism died from laughter as he watched his drunken donkey try to eat a fig, so you know that they must have some alcohol tolerance. But size seems to be key in such matters, and as you down that eighth shot of slightly warm apple-flavored lager stuff you see the small orange pony waver slightly, and you know you have this locked up because you’re barely buzzed. And yet she continues, to the ninth, the tenth, the eleventh shot until you get to number twelve and she slumps across the table.
“Um. I think you win.” And with Fluttershy’s quiet admittance the entire bar cheers, while Applejack sprawls across the table. Pinkie Pie runs over to you and continues what was almost surely an entire paragraph.
“…And you just looked at her and were all like ‘I’m sure you’re quite the drinker.’ But you didn’t KNOW that Applejack is the best drinker in town and I was like GASP and she said yes and I thought for SURE you were going to lose because that’s Applewhiskey and I mean don’t get me wrong, I LOVE to party but even I-“ Twilight put a hoof in her friends mouth and smiled.
“It sure was a surprise to see Applejack beat at her own game. But how are we going to get her home? Big Mac already went home with Junebug, and he’s usually the one to carry Applejack home once she passes out.” You stare at Twilight for a good minute or so, and she seems to sweep your entire body with her eyes. It’s a little creepy. “So, this is a usual thing?” Twilight shakes her head.
“Well no, but on occasion she has been known to be challenged by Berry Punch. But they only ever make it to the eighth or so…” You look back at the orange pony, who was now arguing with the waitress in a slurred tone over apple fritters. “Hmmmm.”
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“Lemme go! I don’t need anypony! I can, I can walk jus’ fine, yuh hear me?” You continue to push the wheelbarrow, taking care to avoid any bumps in the road as Applejack drunkenly slurs her anger at you.
“Uh huh. Look Applejack, you’re drunk. My house is closer, so we’ll take you there and you can sleep this o-“ Applejack leapt like a fish out of the wheelbarrow, and tangling herself in a heap on the marshy ground by the road.
“Aw no you don’t, what kind of pony do you think *hic* do you think *hic* ah am? Untie me!” You walk over to the orange pony and pick her up out of the mud and leaves, placing her back in the wheelbarrow.
“Applejack, you aren’t tied up, that’s your mane you’re stuck in. And anyway, I’m not saying we’d have to like, you know…” Applejack slumped back in the makeshift metal chariot and crossed her hooves.
“I knew it was my mane! And you’re darn right, thinkin’ I’d take a ruttin’ from some kinda… uh… What are you again?” You sigh and roll the wheelbarrow up to your house, throwing the orange pony over your shoulder despite her protests and bringing her inside.
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You fumble with the shower knob as Applejack lays on the bathroom floor, hat over her eyes to keep from staring into the firefly light fixture Fluttershy had made for you.
“Looket here, when this room stops spinnin’ I’m gonna kick you into next harvest season!” You sigh again, growing a little exasperated with the country pony’s constant confrontation. As the hot water hisses on you tap her hat to get her attention.
“Get in.”
Applejack sits up slowly, swaying slightly. “You really think I’m in a fit state you get in there and not slip or pass out? Ah don’t think that ahm the only drunk one here.” Okay then, fine. You start to undress and the orange pony eyes you suspiciously. “Now wait just an apple-picking minute, I-woah!” Now naked, you swiftly grab the mud and leaf coated pony and bring her into the shower with you before she can protest (or kick you), making sure to set her hat on the windowsill.
“Now hold on, don’t go gettin’ any funny ideas! Ahm not some kinda tart like my cousin, uh, Apple Tart.” You grab a bar of soap and nod quietly to yourself, pointing the showerhead down at her coat.
“Methinks the pony doth protest too much.” You take a soapy hand and run it through her mane, using your fingertips to rub the suds deep into her silken coat. You can feel her muscles reacting to the touch, still loose from the alcohol but tightening slightly at your motions.
“Geez, you sure got use for those weird hooves of yours.” You rub your still soapy hand across the underside of her neck, taking care to wash gently around her nose and eyes before rinsing her off. You wipe away the bubbles under her chin, feeling her pulse as you clean her slender neck of suds.
“Buh-by the way, don’t think I luh- I like…” Applejack snorted softly and pressed herself against your hands as you proceeded to scrub her back and shoulders. With a bit of surprise you continue to massage her soft pelt with your hands, working your sudsy hands over her powerful legs. You smile to yourself as you scrub at her hooves, feeling her slacken with disappointment at the movement to a less sensitive area before collecting herself.
“You know Applejack, it’s okay to enjoy yourself.” Applejack lifts her head back up, splashing you with a few trickles of water.
“M' not! Ooooh…” You lather your hands up and rub them along her belly, noticing her go limp as you tenderly rub at her tummy.
“Applejack, I thought you were an honest pony.” She bites her lip for a moment before looking back at you.
“…Shut up and keep going.”
You get down on your knees next to her, noting how she quivers and struggles not to cry out as you massage her belly. You gently rub it in small circles as your other hand continues to scrub her back. Her tail swishes lightly and you see a deep blush flood her cheeks as you move lower on her belly, finding her soft pink teats. Her stomach heaves gently with each breath as you trace tiny circles around each breast, bubbles and suds dripping off of her stiffening nipples.
“Ooh, that actually feels pretty… nice.” The flexing muscles beneath your hands tell you just as much, a sore pony who works hard and hasn’t gotten this kind of gentle attention in quite a while. Of course, you’re more than happy to oblige. Moving down to her hind legs you again lather her up, taking your time on her thighs. You can feel the supple and strong muscles tense and then turn almost to jelly at the rhythmic presses of your fingers, seeking out knots and working them away.
Applejack shifts her weight from one leg to another, hoping the wetness she felt was still only from the shower, not wanting to be too obvious with her enjoyment. Working your way up her legs, you reach her round and very toned flank. Taking your time to admire it, you began to scrub at her backside, delighted to hear her stifle a moan at your touch. You grasp the bar of soap in your hand and slowly swipe it across her cutie mark, working it up into a thick lather. Applejack no longer tries to hide it as she whinnies and nickers at the feeling of your dexterous hands pressing into her flank. Arching her tail up, she lowers herself on her front hooves, resting her chin on the edge of the bath and sighing as you scrub her derriere. Lightly, you grasp her tail in your hands and work some soap through it, getting a peek at her nether regions. Bringing down the showerhead, you gently rinse away all the soap to reveal a cute pink lipped marehood and tight pucker. Replacing the showerhead, you bring a hand up to her lips and press a single finger in, her slick juices allowing you easy access. Applejack moans deeply, her legs buckling as you pump that finger in and out before introducing another. Pulling them out fully, you see her pussy wink at you, the muscles contracting and pushing out slick trails of fluid. Scooping some of it up, you begin rubbing all along the outer lips of her slit, taking care to bring your thumb over her clit with each pass. You can hear Applejack’s heavy pants as you continue to massage her needy sex, now sliding your fingers across her tight ass. You hear her gasp as you push in slowly, making sure you let her get comfortable, though soon it was apparent that it posed no problem.
“Ooh, k-keep goin’ sugarcube!” Withdrawing slowly, you slick up your fingers and again push them into her tight ass, listening to her fast and shallow breaths as you pump your fingers deeper into her accepting hole, the other hand taking advantage of her pussy. Twisting and spreading your digits apart inside her, you feel her body starting to clench around your fingers just before she cums, bucking her hips back onto your hands and squirting a little, encouraging you to go further. Moving behind her, you slide the head of your penis across her sticky lips before pushing in, wrapping her tail around your hand for a bit of a rougher ride. You begin to thrust into her with gusto, hot water still raining down on you as your cock snakes deeper into her warm marehood. Applejack groans with pleasure, a thick string of drool at the edge of her mouth as you keep pounding into her.
“Ah! Yer quite the charmer, sure know how to –mmmph!- treat a mare right!” You give her tail a gentle tug, listening to her low moans as you fuck her like the dirty filly she is. The rhythmic slapping of your hips against her flank echo around the shower, her wet mane covering her eyes as she continues to voice her approval. Pulling out, you start toying with her cute little butt again, smiling at what sounded like a squeal. With a gentle push you feel the tip of your cock slide in, her muscles clenching around the much larger object now sliding into her rear.
“Ooh Celestia, you’re pretty forward huh?” She huffs, her voice shaking a little as you continue to press forth. Finally you feel her body relax, allowing you all the way in, you rest for a moment, letting you both adjust to the new sensation. “Ah, ah’ve never done this before… “ Applejack stops as you begin to pull back, taking a deep breath and letting it go as you push in again. “But ah kinda like it.” Taking that as a good sign, you speed up your thrusts, her tight ring clenching around your cock as she moans into a bitten lip. You hold on to her flank with both hands, rubbing and pressing the muscles in her haunches. Applejack is getting into it now, and you find her thrusting back in time with you, taking it in stride as she drops her head down low. You’re both pushing hard against the other, almost bruising in the intensity of your lovemaking. Moving your hand down to finger her again, you feel her body tighten involuntarily as she climaxes once more, almost braying with pleasure at the flurry of sensation. Your body tenses in response, riding out her orgasm as practically slams you into the back wall of the shower. Applejack slows down, looking at you over her shoulder with heavily lidded eyes, panting and shaky legged.
“C’mon now, I’m a mare who cares to please. You’re coming with me.” She pushes back, grinding her hips in wide circles and making you moan as she works your shaft. Her wet mane hangs in her face, a lusty grin become her only visible feature as she saws her body forward and back, pulling you out to the tip before letting you slide in once more. Suddenly she starts ferociously pounding her body against you, jaw hanging wide open as her muscular buttocks smack against your hips, her ass clenching tighter as she nears her second orgasm. You grab her tail and wrap it around your hand, making her whinny with shock each time you give it a soft tug. Laying the other hand on her cutie mark you rut her like a stallion in heat, each thrust followed by a soft cry from the quivering mare before you.
“I-I’m coming sugarcube!” She climaxes for the third time, her exhausted forelegs giving out as she moans into the wet shower floor. Your own orgasm quickly follows, thick strings of cum filling her spent body, still trying to milk you dry. You both stay there for a moment, the orange pony’s flank twitching in your hands and with her almost sprawled on the shower floor. By now most of the hot water is gone, and in its place a lukewarm rain falls on both of you. You pull out gently and Applejack sighs at the loss. You help her back onto her feet, giving her and yourself a final rinse before turning the shower off and stepping out. The exhausted mare steps out after you on still trembling legs, her drunkenness not doing much to help either. You rub a towel across her body in long strokes, making sure to dry her mane and tail. By this point she’s barely standing, and to be fair you’re pretty tired too. You quickly towel yourself off, noting how she gives you an appreciative nudge with her nose. Walking side by side, you climb into your bed and she follows you in, her warm body pressed close against your chest, the smell of Applewhiskey still on her breath.
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You woke up pretty early, the sweet apple and cinnamon scented mane of the sleeping earth pony in your face. Getting up slowly so as not to disturb her, you gently cover her back up with blankets and head downstairs, smiling at the events that transpired last night. Turning on the oven, you start to make some banana bread, but soon decide against it and instead find yourself making apple nut muffins. Putting a percolator on for coffee, you sit and watch the denizens of Ponyville go about their day, noting with some amusement a rather disheveled looking Junebug walking back from Old Apple Acres. You step outside and wave to her as you grab the paper, her awkwardly retuned wave and quick gallop away giving you a small chuckle as you step back in. Sitting down, you read through a section or two of The Canterlot Times before hearing the soft bubbling sound of the percolator. Grabbing it off the stove, you set it down and also remove the muffins to cool. Just about to head upstairs, you hear the soft clop of hooves on the landing above you and return to your seat. A tired looking Applejack stepped gingerly out from the stairwell, clearly hungover. Turning the page of your newspaper, you open your mouth to say something snide, but she holds a hoof up to stop you.
“Ah just need a few minutes if you’d be so kind.” A simple nod seems to suffice, and you grab her a muffin while she pours out some coffee from the still bubbling percolator.
“Careful, it’s hot.” You say quietly, and this time it’s her turn to nod, both of you sitting quietly across from each other.
“So, uh, listen. Ah had a really good time last night with you, but at the same time…” You hold a hand up and sip your coffee before speaking. “You don’t want me to mention it to anypony, and you aren’t going to do the same.” Applejack rests her head on her hoof.
“What? Nah, I’ll probably wind up tellin’ Twilight at some point, she’s been itchin’ to learn about your ‘anatomy’ since you wound up here; only Celestia’s been holding her back from what ah kin tell.” The implications this has are… interesting. Applejack continued; “But anyway, I just wanted to say that I had a good time last night, and ah really appreciate all you did for me, BUT I won’t forget about you cheatin’ at that drinkin’ contest!” You almost choke on your muffin.
“Cheated?! I did no such thing! Maybe YOU just aren’t the only pony who can handle their drinks.” Applejack smiled and sipped down the rest of her coffee before hopping down from her chair.
“Well maybe I’ll have to challenge you to a rematch in that case. I’ll see you around sugarcube.” Applejack smoothly slipped out the door, leaving you to your thoughts, most prominent being that of how worried you should be about the hyper-magical possible stalker pony that may or may not be after you.
