better season 5 end (backup)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Later that day, back in the castle of friendship, Starlight Glimmer was pacing by herself with a grim expression in front of the map room doors, waiting to be summoned.

The bearers of the EOH were having a meeting to determine her fate. Once they were ready they sent Spike to call her in.

The first time she passed through those large double doors she was full of confidence and malice. Now she was full of worry and regret, even if she still didn't fully understand these feelings. She approached the round table and spoke before anypony else got the chance to say something.

"Before you say anything, I just want you all to know that I'm deeply sorry for what I did, and I know that I can never be forgiven, let alone accept Twilight's offer of friendship now..."

All 6 ponies were staring back at her with varying expressions of anger. All except one that is.

"That's to bad then, I was going to sentence you to being my friend, but I guess if you can't accept that then we'll have to explore other options..." Twilight said with a hint of sarcasm.

"I understand-wait what? What did you just say?"

"Y'all heard her, I for one don't like it one bit, but Twilight wouldn't budge from her position, and since it's her call to make we gotta respect it...for now," Applejack said in almost a threatening way. Starlight however was unable to comprehend why this was happening.

"But-but what about everything I did to you! I was nothing but your enemy till the very end, how can you just forgive me like that?"

"That's the power of a Pinkie Promise!" The pink one chimed.

"The wah?"

"The Pinkie Promise Starlight, the one I made to you in the other world," said Twilight, "I promised you that after you brought me back I would make sure not me or Celestia or anypony else," she glanced around the others at the table, "will take repercussions against you, and i stand by that promise."

"S-surely you're joking! I was threatening you! I made you say that!"

"You told me to promise you that you wouldn't be punished when you brought us back. I was the one that made the Pinkie Promise of my own accord however, and you don't break a Pinkie Promise." Twilight looked over at Pinkie who gave a happy nod. "So, since you held up your side of the deal, I'm upholding mine."

"I...can't believe this..." It was difficult for Starlight to understand all this with the whirlwind of emotions she was feeling right now. "...Why then? Why did you make this special promise to me?"

"Because I was serious about wanting to help you." Twilight responded. "And I still am, an essential part of the process of making friends is forgiveness." She got off her own throne and went in front of the other purple pony. "I forgive you, Starlight," she said with a smile, "Would you like to be friends?"

All eyes were on Starlight now.

"I...I don't know...I want to say yes, but I feel bad thinking about it..." She said, almost choking trying to hold her emotions back.

"Is it the same kind of bad you felt being with Nightmare Moon?" asked Twilight.

"...No, actually, it's different..."

"That's because you're feeling like you don't deserve to be my friend, because you feel bad about what you did to me, because you care about me, because you're not a monster. That's also a normal part of friendship, but it's not the only part, if you would let go of this concept of deserving, then I could help show you all the wonderful things friendship has to offer." She held her hoof out. "What do you say?"

All eyes were still on her, though by now the anger in them had vanished.

Starlight stared at the hoof in front of her, then slowly brought up her own.

Twilight grabbed it before it was all the way up and pulled Starlight into a hug. "Thank you for choosing the magic of friendship."

"Thank you, Princess Twilight." Starlight cried into her shoulders.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The ordeal was over.

Peace was made for the ponies.

The power to travel to whole new worlds.

Such a power is to great to be used lightly.

It's secrets will be kept in good hooves from then on.

......

However, little did they know, there were already other powers in motion, and the power to connect to other worlds would be a power that they would see again, soon, but probably not soon enough.........

change cap words to the slanted ones perhaps?...

and find out about reducing the number of ands thens buts ect used in the fic...

have starlight take off twi's wing restraints

k there's like 7 things i need to change that i'll jot down here first

1 and 2 are dialogue removes , the one about stupid friends and another early on about star losing friends , which is the next thing (actually the stupid friends one can stay since now it's not conflicting with star's character motivation)

3 changing star's character , she doesn't see twi as a friend and doesn't want to be one , sees her as the enemy

4 she knows she wasn't friends with the ponies in the village she was jsut taking advantage of them

5 remember to add at the end how world traveling will be used again in my next fic

6 change portal dioluge , there were no portals for others to go through

7 and something else maybe i've already covered it maybe not.... ah got it , replacing the ! on the first twilight with .

8 found another one which was part of the original 7 , which was to remove remarks about time travle

add in somewhere about how star was able to get to starswirl's library , say she told the guards she was twi's friend , adding another friend benefit for her to be persuaded by.....

ok so gonna plot out the main scene concepts for the plot , once i think i have a nice flow for the fic balancing tension and relaxation and such and it's long enough for the character development then i'll start creating the scenes and dialogue as it's to be shown in the finished fic....

so first scene twilight confronts starlight sitting in her throne , twi's magic hitting the scroll and thus tying her being to the activation of the scroll will be an important plot point

ok let me come back a bit and remember to explain that the entire theme of the fic is have twi trying to get starlight to stop hating her and maybe be her friend , to protect her subject , and starlight gradually turning around inside.....

starlight explains how she used a starswirl scroll and spell to create a portal to an alternate reality , one where she told the magic of the scroll that the sonic rainboom rainbowdash preformed in her fillyhood didn't happen

maybe have a plot point where she hides a duplicate of the scroll in her mane , which can now be seen to be tied at the tip and base with small pendants , explaining that they are magic enhancers like the alicorn amulet only not as strong and that explains why she's able to match twilight's level of magic and not get instantly subdued by her and have the story be over , though the 2 items aren't mutually inclusive....

if she has a back up scroll though she wont need twilight to escape but twilight would need her so she could return herself and leave twilight stuck in another dimension , problem with that is that she can do it right away without twilight realizing what's going on.....or perhaps not , as shown in the show the scroll projects a 3d image showing a large area of space , let's presume this is a projection of the different reality the scroll is going to connect to , this projection apparently needs to happen first before the scroll can activate , let's call it a safety mechanism designed by starswirl , to prevent travelers from ending up in a place that's not hospitable to them without knowing it like how stargate has some safe protocols , and it lasts a few seconds before the floating scroll can begin to open a portal , this could give twilight time to react and imprint her magic on the scroll so it takes her back as well , meaning for starlight to make sure it's just her that returns she would have to be by herself when she imprints herself on her backup scroll so that twi wont be there to tag herself too....

if that's how the scroll will work and she has a backup can i devise a chain of events so that she doesn't get to use it right away? and could it still be hidden for the grand reveal at the end with it still being in her character?.....

....yes i think i can , cause if i make it that they get captured right away and imprisoned by nmm with magic suppressors on them , then starlgiht wont be able to use her magic until it's removed and that would only happen when in the fic nmm decides to take starlight on as an apprentice , thus starlight would always be in threat of not being able to secure her escape and would have no reason to reveal to the audience that she has the scroll till the end.....

ok so portal happens then , they take in the new surrounding forest , argue , twi pleads , try to analyze the situation , then get interrupted by a 3 night bat pony guard patrol 2 with spears , batpony sees the scroll and deciphers alternate dimensions in the ancient text and tries to cease startwi , twi tries to protect star and fight the 2 guards but her attack fails and star comes in and takes care of the guards herself

the one with the scroll flys back to nmm , startwi give chase (star not yet wanting to reveal that she doesn't need that scroll cause she has a backup)

startwi confront nmm , guard already gave the scroll to nmm though , she knows they're from another dimension , obviously she wants them to show her that power right away , star gets mouthy with nmm , twi realizing the gravity of the situation

a: appologizes for star?

b: telleport both out of there and get away from nmm?

c: try and force her way passed nmm and get the scroll back herself/with starlight's help?

the scroll is why they're there , twi only knows that is the way to get back home , does she come up with some way to get passed to sate nmm or leave it up to chance that nmm wont destroy the scroll in their absence?

probably b since nmm would obviously want to keep the only connection to this other worldly power intact , giving startwi an opportunity to escape and.......no what about c? twi has done more daring things already , when she first confronted nmm he had nothing , now she is practically an equal , she could try and apologize/stall/reason with nmm , fight to get the scroll back , maybe save star in some way that winds them up getting captured and imprisoned , then it's easy character development time , i'll make a concession of having them imprisoned in the same place rather than separately like any smart ruler like nmm would do....

maybe some torture happens , then star offers to tell nmm the identities of the barres of the eoh which she learned from twilight is the only power that can stop her in exchange for becoming her apprentice nmm agrees to the arrangement and star gets to see first hand how nmm rules this new equestria thanks to starlight's actions , actually that should be included in the discussion how it's thanks to star that nmm is in power , maybe making nmm want to repay star with the apprenticeship and anything else her kingdom can offer to star , making star then think that she's going to get everything she wanted in life including nmm's freindship

except she wont want that cause my starlight character now doesn't care about friendship at all

star is then tasked with interrogating twilight to get the names of the rest of her friends , twi resists and feels are hard but later she dreams about her friends and nmm sees into her dream and acquire the rest of the mane6 , shit is about to happen

but then at some point star finds that nmm's friendship isn't exactly nice or what she thought she wanted , maybe she finds that the friendship twilight kept offering to her was the better option , and considers whether to keep doing what she's doing and stay with nmm , or do something to help twilight instead....

with the information of the eoh extracted from twi and them being taken care of nmm no longer has a reason to keep twi alive , the only one who has ever stopped her apparently

so nmm readies twi's execution by nmm herself , ....hmmm just thinking about when would it be a good time to destroy the scroll for dramatic tension for the audience , at the end? or in the middle when star is torturing twi and does that to prove beyond a shadow of a doubt her loyalty to queen nmm , probably that one since it will give the audience the impression that this fic is serious grim bad end stuff , only to be pleasantly surprised at the end with the extra scroll reveal , oh yeah and star stops nmm with her cutiemark erasing special talent at the last second while twi is pleading for help from star , then they escape and twi is thrilled to have star accept her friendship but she still has an emotional breakdown thinking that she'll never see her friends again , then star does the big reveal and they go home the friendship court happens and maybe an additional bonus clop chapter can come after....

yeah let's keep clop out of the main fic so others who watch the show but don't like clop could read this much better narrative too.....

oh oh right i almost forgot , where do i put in star's tragic like backstory that gives her motivation to hate twi so much and do this in the first place?  and more specifically what is it?....

things i need to find out , starswirl and cutiemarks