Ponylands: First encounters; Part One

Rainbow dash was very confused about what just happened. She had just kicked a weird-shaped being who had an odd shaped mask and body armor with a zero painted on it. It had died. It was self-defense, of course, but not really. The figure had walked into her temporary home that was on the ground in Ponyville. She didn't know what to do, so she kicked it square in the head. There was a crack in the helmet, so she decided to further break the helmet, revealing where the face should be. Then she felt it. A cold feeling on the back of her head. She tried to turn around.

"One more step, I pull the trigger," said a voice from behind.

"What happens then?" Dash asked.

"You die."

Dash gulped. "What do you want from me? If it's about this body on the floor, I didn't mean it! It was a subconscious reaction!"

The figure shook his head.

"I want your loot."

"What?"

"Your loot. You heard me."

"What's loot?"

Dash didn't see, but the figure facepalmed.

"Do you have any guns?"

"What's a gun?" Dash asked.

The figure took his pistol off of Dash's head. Dash turned and almost fainted. The figure looked identical to the corpse on the ground. The corpse started to evaporate in a digital way.

"You do realize that is a hologram, right?" The figure asked suspiciously.

"What's a hol-"

"Don't. Even. Ask."

Dash was very confused. She decided that she should try to make a break for it. The door was wide open. She dashed. She went so fast that there was a sonic rainboom and her house blew up. Then she felt a searing pain in her wing. She started falling and falling until she finally hit the ground. Dash thought she was having a bad day, but the rest of the Mane 6 wasn't any better.

Twilight Sparkle was suspended in midair. She was knocked unconscious from the force of the blast. Then she woke up. She was still suspended in midair, but not as high. The creature who had done this was tall, sleek, and had odd markings on her visible skin. Before Twilight was unconscious, there was a big "magic" duel. The creature had blown up Twilight's wall with some form of ball magic. Twilight had shot some lasers at it. But it just fell and killed a pony and got back up. Then Twilight got angry.

"WHY DID YOU KILL THAT INNOCENT PONY!?!?!!!!" Twilight shouted.

The creature was unaffected by the yell.

"Re-lax. It'll just respawn at the nearest respawn station. By the way, why aren't there psychos shouting about poop trains?"

"I DON'T KNOW IF YOU HAVE NOTICED, BUT THIS IS A LAND OF PEACE AND HARMONY!!!!!!!!!"

"Jeez, I'm sorry."

Twilight went full alicorn. She shot a gigantic laser at the creature, but before it could reach it, the creature put Twilight in a giant sphere. And the blast from the laser that was trapped in the bubble knocked Twilight out. When Twilight woke up, she was very confused. The creature was looking in Twilight's chests.

"No guns? No shields? Not even a class

mod?" The creature shouted angrily. "Tina told me this place would be full of loot. I wonder if zer0 and the others are having a better time."

"Who and who now?" Twilight asked.

" zer0, Krieg, Salvador, Axton, and I think her name is Gaige. Oh, and me, Maya."

"And who are those people?"

"Vault hunters. People like me. My team."

"What's a vault hunter?"

"A person who hunts a vault. What do you think?"

"What kind of vault?"

"An alien vault."

"Is it to protect the aliens or something?"

"No. It holds weapons, shields, and all sorts of stuff. But there's a hoax. You have to beat the vault guardian, which is almost unkillable. I killed one once before." Maya said boastingly.

"Why would you want to kill anything?" Twilight asked suspiciously.

"This isn't Pandora, is it?" Maya asked stupidly.

"We're in a land called Equestria. I'm one of the four alicorn princesses here. I'm the princess of frie-"

"Uh-huh, that's a cool story, do you know where I can get a gun or two around here?" Maya interrupted.

"What's a gun?"

"A ranged weapon that shoots metal really fast."

"The only ranged weapon in Equestria is a unicorn horn, which only works if it is attached to the horn's owner and the owner is alive. I know what you're thinking, Maya. The horns shoot different kinds of lasers."

"Fine. How about shields?"

"Shields can be used by anypony, but only strong ponies can wield them."

"Oh thank god." Maya said thankfully. "Can you get me one?" Twilight asked if she could come out of the bubble first. She explained how her brother was the head of the Canterlot royal guard, and he had tons of shields.

"Fine. I guess you won't shoot lasers at me anymore." Maya said sarcastically.

"Ok. I have to do a teleport spell. Ready?" Twilight said, ignoring Maya.

"Oh. This has happened before," Maya muttered. "Ya, I'm ready."

Twilight cast the spell, and it was not what Maya expected. It was more...peaceful then she expected.

Then she appeared in an armory. She saw old fashioned shields.

"Crap. I should have expected as much."

"What? These are shields."

"This. Is a shield." Maya passed her shield to Twilight and told her to put it on her side. Then Maya shot Twilight. Twilight felt nothing. "My kind of shield is high-tech, so I don't have to carry it."

Then it happened. A huge explosion appeared in the wall.

"Hey, I never got a chance to kill you before. And, by the way, you think that I wouldn't put MYSELF into one of those respawn stations I have? Well, no matter. Now is the perfect time, because I get to kill innocent ponies! Although Butt Stallion will be untouched, of course." He had Rarity in his hands, because she looked a lot like Butt Stallion. "Butt Stallion, poop out some guns for me." The man gave Rarity some eridium. Rarity choked on it and spit it out. "Butt Stallion, don't be like this. I need a gun to kill these bi-"

"Don't. Even. Start. Swearing is highly forbidden in Equestria. Anypony who swears gets severely punished."

"And I care why? I'm f****** Handsome Jack. I can swear whenever I want to. Isn't that right, Butt Stallion?" Rarity cried to Twilight for help. That made Twilight angry. Twilight summoned spike.

"Spike, take a note. Make it say,

'Dear Princess Celestia. I know that you are very busy right now, but I have some serious business on my hooves. An odd being who calls itself Handsome Jack has kidnapped Rarity. He also dropped the F-bomb in the process. If you could come and handle it, that would be very nice. Sincerely, Twilight Sparkle.'"

Spike breathed fire on the letter and Handsome Jack laughed.

"You think that you can bring me down with a letter to a princess? That's priceless. To show you not to mess with me, I'll give you an example of what happens when you mess with me." Jack pulled out an old rusty pistol from the corpse of a bandit. He covered a bullet in eridium. Then he put the bullet in the pistol. He cocked the pistol. "Welcome to Pandora, Kiddos." He said mockingly as the bullet he just shot went straight through Spike's head.