Second Chances, Many Changes

by ASGeek2012

Chapters

Chapter 2 - First Impressions
Chapter 3 - Deepening Confusion
Chapter 4 - Things Get Weird(er)
Chapter 5 - Change Of Scenery
Chapter 6 - A Binding Promise After All
Chapter 7 - What's In A Name?
Chapter 8 - Morning In Ponyville
Chapter 9 - Memories
Chapter 10 - On Edge
Chapter 11 - Summoned By Royalty
Chapter 12 - Nothing Is Simple
Chapter 13 - Rethinking
Chapter 14 - Hurt
Chapter 15 - Last Chances
Chapter 17 - A Decision Made
Chapter 18 - Explanations
Chapter 19 - Should I Be Worried?
Chapter 20 - Membership
Chapter 21 - Shadows From The Past
Chapter 22 - Found
Chapter 23 - Craziness Compounded
Chapter 24 - A Loss And A Win
Chapter 25 - Surprises
Chapter 26 - A Trip To The Everfree
Chapter 28 - A Conversation With Newer Friends
Chapter 29 - A Most Trying Day
Chapter 30 - A Most Chaotic Day
Chapter 31 - Realization And Resolve
Chapter 32 - Flaws In The Theory
Chapter 33 - Deception Revealed
Chapter 34 - Fear
Chapter 35 - Rage
Chapter 36 - Divided Loyalties
Chapter 37 - Confrontations
Chapter 38 - A Friendship Strained
Chapter 39 - Playing The Game
Chapter 40 - Shattered Illusions
Chapter 41 - Portents
Chapter 42 - Time Runs Out
Chapter 43 - Checkmate
Chapter 44 - Reasons And Intent
Chapter 45 - Sunset
Chapter 47 - Don't Talk Back
Chapter 49 - Spoiled [Re-edited]
Chapter 50 - Forgiveness and Fortitude
Chapter 51 - Saying Goodbye [Re-edited]
Chapter 52 - Affairs of the Heart
Chapter 53 - City Bound
Chapter 54 - A Taste Of Home
Chapter 55 - Hearts Sundered
Chapter 56 - Hearts Renewed
Chapter 57 - Heart's Calling
Epilogue - Full Circle
Chapter 27 - A Conversation With An Old Friend
Chapter 46 - Yakity-Yak
Chapter 48 - Growing Pains
Chapter 1 - A Second Chance
Chapter 16 - Education

Chapter 2 - First Impressions

Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.

Chapter 3 - Deepening Confusion

The air is cool and damp, and the street lamps cast pale circles on the wet streets. The rain did nothing to wash away the grime, as if the buildings themselves somehow ooze the stuff like some urban infection. I cannot walk more than a few feet without feeling it attach itself to me like a leech, as if branding me.

If my mother ever found out I came here, she would be horrified. But, no, she ... she's dead. I have to keep reminding myself of that, even after three years. Yet I don't want to be here, either.

I look down at myself and gasp. I raise an arm and stare at my hand. It IS a hand! And I have feet again. Not hooves.

Hooves? That's a bizarre thing to think. What am I on?

That's just it, I'm not. Somehow people think I'm on something, and I have no idea how that rumor started. It eventually got back to Michelle.

Michelle! That's why I'm here! I haven't been able to reach her all day. She won't respond to emails or texts. God, I wish my aunt would've given Michelle some money out of my trust so she didn't have to live in this part of town. I don't care how much Michelle wants to help the community; she doesn't have to live inside the drug lords' territory.

My heart is racing. I'm already assuming the worst.

I race to the front door, trying to avoid stepping in disgusting detritus, everything from discarded fast-food meals to crack vials. I clamber up the stairs to the third floor. I utter a gasp as the hallway stretches out before me.

And stretches ...

I start running, but Michelle's apartment just gets further away. I hear crying. Wailing. Begging for mercy. Is she getting beat up? Did one of the addicts she was helping go psychotic on her? Oh God, I have to get to her! I can't reach her apartment! Why can't I reach it?!

"Why are you doing this to me?!" Michelle's voice wails, and I feel an icy chill. "I thought you were my friend!"

I'm going to fail again. I can never get there. It always stays out of reach. It--

OH, MY GOD, WHAT?!

I-I'm floating ... no, ROCKETING down the hallway. My feet are not touching the floor. I'm cocooned by a weird dark blue glow. In seconds, I'm deposited before the apartment door.

"Go to her," a strange voice suddenly echoes around me. "Now!"

I'm filled with a confidence I never experienced before, and I kick the door, knowing it will yield. It slams open as if hit with the force of a pile-driver. The moment is quickly gone, and a strange sense of disorientation sweeps over me, the scene wavering for a few seconds before resolving itself into cruel clarity.

The living room floor is covered in drug paraphernalia, but strangely, there is no pattern to it. Just bits of this and that, like someone decided to take a sample of everything one could possibly buy on the street. There is a brown stain on the sofa and carpet. I recoil from it until I sniff the air.

Chocolate?

A mug lays on its side on the floor, but I ignore this when my gaze lands on the fallen teenage girl with scraggly blonde hair, her body clad in a disheveled nightgown. She rolls over on her back, gasping as if unable to breathe. Her eyes are sunken, like she has not slept in days.

Oh, God, she's dying.

"Michelle!" I scream, dropping to my knees at her side. "No, please ..."

She turns her milky eyes to me. "Wh-why ... why didn't you ..."

"I'm sorry I didn't get here earlier!"

She coughs and closes her eyes. "I-I ... sh-should have told me ... I c-could have helped."

"But I wasn't doing drugs!" I screech. I look around. "Oh, God ... but ... y-you were?!"

Michelle stares up at the ceiling, clutching the pendant between her breasts. "I-I can?? ... N-no ... who are you ... what ..."

I'm in tears, struggling to make sense of this. "Michelle, please, I'll get help, I'll c-call nine-one-one, I ..."

Michelle is paying me no mind. She's too far gone. My heart sinks into my stomach. She's dying, and I can't stop it.

"Yes ... I-I will ..." Michelle rasps. "P-please don't apologize ... I ... y-yes ... Rachel ..."

I'm almost too hysterical to answer. "Huh? Wh-what??"

"Take the pendant back."

"No ... no, Michelle, I gave to you as a sign of our friendship." I swallowed hard. "A f-friendship I just fucked up ..."

"Take it!" Michelle wheezes. "Don't ... d-don't give it up! Don't be p-parted from it. Don't ever let it be taken from you!"

"B-but ... I don't ... MICHELLE!!"

My scream simply echoes into the distance as Michelle breathes her last.

The apartment is gone. I'm on the street again. Feet pound behind me. I can't run fast enough. My sides ache and my heart is about to burst. My legs are lead. I turn down an alley, but it is a dead end.

"End of the road for you, bitch."

I gasp and whirl around. This ... this is new. I never had this happen before, but then again, I never got into the apartment before, either. It's the gunman from the alley. I back up until my spine strikes a brick wall. He steps up to me, pulling out his gun. I whimper and slide down the wall.

"You fuck up a life, you get yours fucked up in return."

I cower and heave. I have no more tears to give.

"THIS HAS GONE FAR ENOUGH."

I gasp as the voice reverberates through the dreamscape, and the heavens suddenly burst into gorgeous starry brilliance. A huge silver moon hangs in the sky, far larger than I ever remember it being. My eyes widen as a graceful winged creature of deep midnight blue emerges from it. With her horse-like body, she looks like a pegasus, but ... no, she has a long tapering horn, which glows and fires a bolt of light down upon the frozen gunman, dissipating him like mist.

I'm staring in both confusion and awe as the creature lands upon her hooves before me, a crescent moon upon her flanks. She folds her wings and regards me with teal eyes. Her mane and tail flow like liquid night, stars sparkling in their depths.

"I am most curious," the strange equine says. "You are a very unfamiliar manner of creature. Unless you are dreaming of yourself in this form? Do you wish me to dispel it as well?"

"I-I have no idea what you mean," I sputter. "This dream isn't going the way it usually does."

"You have had this before? What is different?"

"Getting into the apartment. And the gunman. He wasn't there before. But ... this is my first dream after I was ... uh ..."

"After what?"

I realize I'm dreaming? That's never happened, either!

"I am sorry I must ask you this," said the equine, her voice becoming more serious. "But is there something you need to tell me?"

"I don't understand."

"About your real nature," she says, taking another step towards me, her eyes narrowing slightly. "What you really are."

My eyes widen. My heart races.

"What is it?" says the equine. "What is frightening you?"

I bolt around her and run out of the alley.

"No, please, wait!" the equine cries. "I only wish to understand! I only--"

I bolted upright in bed and panted into the moonlit room. My eyes darted about, as if expecting to find that strange creature standing there, but I was alone. I glanced towards the window and gasped, my eyes wide.

The moon! It had ...

It ...

No, I must have imagined it. For a moment it looked like the shadowy visage of a horned pony lay superimposed upon it. It was just the same silvery disk it had been before. Still larger than what I was used to on Earth, but inert just the same.

Only when I laid back down did I realize I was clutching the pendant in my trembling hooves.

"Calm down," I said in a quavering voice. "Just a dream. Just that same stupid dream."

Except it was not the same. It had always ended with me screaming in frustration that I could not reach Michelle's door. The strange equine was new, too. Was she supposed to be another pony princess? Why had I not simply seen Twilight instead? Why conjure another out of thin air?

Speculation was making me more upset. It was just a stupid fucking dream. It had no more relevance than any I had on Earth.

I was still dead tired, but I had a lot of trouble getting back to sleep.

Morning sunlight streamed into the room the next time I opened my eyes. I was relieved to have slept through the rest of the night, but not so much to find I was still a pony. I was still really bleary, and I hoped this world had coffee or some other form of morning pick-me-up.

The door was suddenly thrown open, and a bright pink pony cried in a sing-song voice, "Good morning!"

I must have jumped a foot off the mattress. Screw caffeine, that woke me up fast. Still, it took me a moment to recognize her. Only when she bounced into the room, and I had a better look at her poofy mane did I remember.

And I mean bounced, like her hooves were made out of rubber.

"Um, morning, Pinkie," I said. "I didn't know they allowed visitors this early."

Pinkie giggled. "Oh, I'm not a visitor! Well, technically I'm visiting you since I'm in here and not out there, but I'm a volunteer at the hospital, so I can visit special fillies like you. Well, volunteer-visit. Visit-volunteer? Volunteering to visit! No, wait, visiting while volunteering, maybe?"

"I get it!" I cried.

"Oh, good, maybe you can explain it to me later! Anyway, I have something very special for the very special filly."

Dear God, I did not want to contemplate what she had in mind. I guessed she was supposed to cheer up the underage patients, I got that, but she was exuberance on overload. "I really appreciate it, but I don't actually need anything right now."

"Oh, but you most definitely need my little surprise."

"But I have everything I need--"

"But you surely don't have this!"

I was struggling not to be angry with her. I was not a morning person in the best of times. "Why do you think I need something?"

"Because of how unwelcome your arrival in Ponyville was!"

"You don't need to make me feel welcome." I supposed I felt like being welcomed was akin to accepting my transformation. Not logical, perhaps, but my emotions were still a little raw.

She shook her head. "No, it's far more than that! And you really really need it!"

"No, I don't."

"Yes, you do!"

"Really, I don't."

"But you do!"

"No! I don't!"

"No, you don't!"

"Argh, yes, I do!"

She giggled. "See, I knew you really did need it!"

My brain sputtered. My God, did she really do something straight out of a Looney Tunes cartoon? And I fell for it?!

Taking shameless advantage of my shock, Pinkie bounced into the center of the room and spun around to face me. I nearly did a double-take when she suddenly had a top hat on her head and one of her forelegs wrapped around a cane. Where the hell did they come from??

No. No way. She was not going to ...

The day had dawned so wonderfully warm and bright ...

Yes. Yes she was. She was going to sing.

... and not a care to be had down on the old apple farm.

This must have been planned by the whole damn staff, for there was music to go along with her lyrics. I just couldn't tell exactly where it was coming from (or for that matter, the spotlight that suddenly shone down on her).

But the ponies were stirred by a worrisome sight
for they feared a fair filly had come to great harm.

When she stirred, it was to a great relief
and they were glad this filly was well.
But then they learned to their shock and grief
That of the filly's memories nothing rang a bell.

Wait, this was about me?

She was left without a single care
She was left to take a great fall
This is terrible and simply not fair!
This is not a fine welcome, no, not at all!

Where were her balloons, her party, her cake?
Where were the ponies to welcome her to their town?
No, to this an apology we must make!
For her smile that instead was a frown!

We are sorry, dear filly, for doctors and nurses in great profusion
We are sorry, dear filly, for tests and tests and yet more still
So please, dear filly, let there be absolutely no confusion
That you, dear filly, are most welcome in Ponyville!

And with the end of her song came a hail of confetti, materializing out of thin air.

I was left utterly speechless at first, mostly from the sheer absurdity of the experience. "Um ... I ... th-thank you," I finally said in a somewhat stunned voice. "That was nice."

Seriously, it was. Silly and over-the-top, but I had the feeling that was just par for the course with her.

She bounced back to me, all smiles. "Aww, I'm glad you liked it. And I'm sure if Dashie were here, she'd apologize, too, for the way she treated you."

Rainbow Dash likely had about as much chance of apologizing as I did spontaneously turning back into a human, but Pinkie wanting to apologize on behalf of that pegasus was sort of touching.

"I need to get going now, but -- oh!" She drew back from me when her ears suddenly twitched and her left foreleg jerked.

"Something the matter?"

"Ear twitch and leg jerk!"

"Um, okay?"

"That means you're going to get a new visitor you've never seen before. My Pinkie Sense is never wrong!"

Pinkie Sense? Okay, I was not taking that bait. This world was bizarre enough.

"Need anything else before I go?" Pinkie asked.

"No, I think I'm good."

"Okey-dokey!" She bounced away from me and paused at the door. "Now I hope you get your memory back soon, or I'll just have to come up with a name for you myself!"

I managed a small smile despite inwardly cringing at the prospect of Pinkie naming me. She waved before departing in another cascade of confetti. Just where did she keep all that stuff??

Once I recovered from Pinkie Pie's visit, I had a chance to do what I had intended to do when I had first awakened.

With some effort, I manipulated the pendant chain so that the clasp was in front. My heart was thumping as I narrowed my eyes, trying to get my hooves to move with a precision I was not sure was ever intended. Yet after the third try, there was a faint click, and the clasp was undone.

I closed my eyes and uttered a sigh of relief, then mentally chided myself for letting Twilight get to me. For awhile she had me worried that perhaps I indeed could not remove it myself.

The door opened. Nurse Redheart entered, pushing a wheeled cart. Atop it sat a tray with something that made my eyes widen and my mouth water. Eggs! Oh, God, yes! Thank you, alien pony biology, for allowing me this. As a human, there had yet to be a way to prepare eggs that I did not like (scrambled in this case).

Her eyes flicked over me. "You don't need to remove the pendant to eat breakfast, but if you do wish me to set it aside for you, I would be happy to do so."

"That won't be necessary," I said in a voice more curt than I had intended. I fumbled with the clasp, as closing it proved harder than opening it.

Nurse Redheart advanced. "Do you need some help?"

"No, I can get it, I--" It slipped from my hooves. I glanced down to grab it again and--

What? The clasp was closed? How did I do that?

"Apparently so," said Nurse Redheart with a tiny smile. She transferred the tray to me. "I will be back after breakfast to give you a bath."

"Thank you," I said, but she had already turned away and was heading out of the room.

I had to admit that I thought it odd that Nurse Redheart felt it necessary to bathe me. I was not physically incapacitated. Well, in their view. I felt like I was, since I still did not know how to do fine movements with hooves or use levitation magic. Granted, I was grateful for the assist, it just seemed a bit strange.

Nurse Redheart arrived soon after I had finished eating. "You'll need to remove your pendant first, of course," she told me as I was getting out of bed.

I knew that was coming. I started to manipulate the chain. "Where will you put it?"

"Just over on the table there," she said, pointing a hoof at the table against the opposite wall near the door.

That meant it would be out of sight. I felt my ears flatten. Damn expressive pony ears.

"Something wrong?" Nurse Redheart asked.

"Can we leave it in the bathroom instead, please? I'd rather it not be out of my sight."

Nurse Redheart did not appear pleased with this, but she nodded just the same. "Very well."

I removed it when we entered the bathroom, and it was placed on the counter. I could not help but keep shifting my eyes to it. I didn't think I enjoyed the bath as much as I had hoped. Regardless, I was clean, and that shampoo she used on my mane and tail made those day-glo colors become even brighter in hue as I had feared.

I flinched when Nurse Redheart swept up the pendant in her fore-hoof. "Just bringing this into the room for you," she said with a smile.

I forced a small smile and a nod in return. God, I needed to stop being so anxious. She placed it on the table, right near the edge closest to the door before directing me to a towel spread out on the floor.

I sat down on my haunches as Nurse Redheart fetched a brush from a drawer of the dresser. She positioned herself beside me, and I felt the brush engage my mane. It hit a tangle right away. After a pause, I heard -- and felt -- a rip of hairs.

"Ouch!" I cried.

"Sorry, dear," said Nurse Redheart.

I winced. "Could you please -- ouch! -- be a little more -- ouch! -- gentle back there?!"

"You do want these mats out, don't you?"

"With a little less -- ouch! -- pain, yes!"

Urgh. I hated having my hair pulled. As a kid, I drove my mother's maid insane with how much I cried over the littlest snag, and now I had someone with an earth pony's strength doing it. It was one of the reasons I kept my hair short and straight when I got older.

"Ouch!"

Nurse Redheart sighed. I honestly didn't give a fuck if she was getting irritated.

I heard a knock at the door, and a muffled unfamiliar voice called out, "Hello, there, darling, are you decent?"

Decent? Seriously? I was a naked pony in a world of naked ponies. I couldn't get any more or less decent. "Um, yeah -- ouch! -- I'm good, come -- ouch! -- in."

The door glowed and opened. In walked two ponies, one of whom was Fluttershy, an uncertain expression on her face. The other was a marshmallow white pony with a wavy purple mane and three diamonds as her cutie mark.

In other words, a visitor I had never seen before. Whatever this Pinkie Sense was, I supposed it was indeed accurate.

The white pony suddenly stopped and uttered a horrified gasp. Shit, was I not decent after all? Were my girly bits showing between my hind legs?

"My stars, whatever you are doing to that poor filly's mane?!" the white pony cried.

"I'm trying to brush it out," said Nurse Redheart. "Why do you -- hey!"

I saw movement out of the corner of my eye. The brush was floating in mid-air, softly glowing. The white unicorn's horn was glowing as well.

"Brushing?" the unicorn scoffed as she stepped forward. "More like torturing."

"I am trying to get the mats out of her mane."

"Yes, but did you take any notice whatsoever of how curly her hair is?"

"That's one of the problems I'm having."

The unicorn closed her eyes and lifted her muzzle. "Obviously. You clearly do not know how to work with such hair."

"Look, Miss whoever-you-are, I don't--"

"Rarity."

"Miss Rarity, I don't need you tell me how to care for a patient."

Rarity opened her eyes. "But I clearly need to show you how to care for a mane."

Nurse Redheart reached for the brush but Rarity levitated it out of reach. "I am quite sure I am not supposed to let you work on the patients."

Rarity rolled her eyes. "Yes, of course, protocol and all that." She narrowed her eyes and scraped a hoof against the floor, where something glittered. "And I am sure confetti is considered part of the normal hygienic decor."

Fluttershy giggled softly. I smiled. Nurse Redheart, however, seethed. I had to admit, Nurse Redheart seemed a bit on edge today. Maybe she hadn't had enough coffee or something. That might explain why she never had someone come to clean up the confetti Pinkie Pie had left.

"I believe I know my mistake," said Nurse Redheart. "I am using the wrong brush. Allow me to--"

"Do not blame the brush for your lack of skill. This is perfectly adequate for the task at hoof." Rarity lowered the brush to my mane. "Now, pay attention."

Nurse Redheart sighed and frowned.

I felt Rarity slide the brush through my hair. "You don't attempt to brute-force the hairs from their natural arrangement." The brush snagged, and I tensed. "You work with the natural flow of the hair." The brush twisted, and I felt a gentle tug on the hairs, then heard a ripping noise as a mat was freed. "And you untangle the hair with minimal stress on the hair. Or the pony, for that matter."

Nurse Redheart smiled, but it seemed forced. "Thank you."

"Watch a few more times, please, to make sure you get it," said Rarity. I felt the brush move through my mane again. Even as bossy as Rarity seemed, she had a gentle touch. I was almost enjoying this. "You see? Now, you try."

"Actually, Miss Rarity, you appear to know what you are doing," said the nurse. "Would you simply like to continue?"

Rarity hesitated. "Oh, well, that depends on your patient, of course."

"I'm fine with it," I said. Anything not to be subjected to Nurse Redheart's heavy-hoofed approach. She struck me initially as more gentle than this, but I suppose everyone has their bad days.

Everypony. I really needed to get used to their mannerisms.

"Rarity is good at this sort of thing," said Fluttershy with a soft smile.

"Oh?" I looked up. "Are you a hairdresser, Miss Rarity?"

"Please, darling, just Rarity will do. I'm actually a dressmaker and fashion designer, but I know a thing or two about personal grooming."

Fluttershy must have noticed my surprise, as she was peering at me curiously. So this pony whom I never saw before takes an interest in me, and she just happened to work in one of first industries that my mother owned before she died? Oh, yeah, that's not suspicious at all. Never mind the incongruity of making clothing for a largely naked pony population.

Or maybe I was just being paranoid and should just ask. "So what brought you down here to see me, Rarity?"

"I am friends with Fluttershy and the other ponies who found you," said Rarity. "The only reason I was not there was because I had back orders to catch up on and could not attend the picnic."

So that explained why so many ponies found me all at once. I guess it sort of explained why Rarity wanted to visit. Still, that was really eerie. I felt a little uneasy.

"You really do have a rather lovely mane, dear," said Rarity. "The colors go together fabulously and complement your coat very well."

"Thanks," I said. I took her word for it. They still looked too bright for my tastes.

"Your natural curls are quite nice, but could do with being styled. I would be happy to arrange for that."

"I really don't have any money."

"Nonsense, I would not dream of making you pay for it. Perhaps we could combine it with a spa treatment as well."

And now she was being exceedingly generous towards me? And ponies had spas?

"Um, something wrong?" Fluttershy said.

Damn, she could read me too well. Her voice always had a tone of concern to it, like she really did care what I was feeling. "Oh, nothing, I was just thinking that I hope my memory comes back so I don't have to be an imposition on everyb ... er ... everypony."

"It is no imposition whatsoever," said Rarity. "You have had a hard time of it, and you deserve to be pampered a bit." She lifted the brush. "I am finished with your mane. Would you like me to do your tail as well?"

"Um, sure."

"If you would be so kind as to stand, please."

I rose to my hooves just as I caught movement out of the corner of my eye. Nurse Redheart was moving off, and Rarity stepped forward, blocking my view of the table. I called out in a bit of a panicked voice, "My pendant!"

Rarity reacted at once. "What about it, dear?"

"It's over on the table by the--"

Rarity had already swung her head towards the door, allowing me to see it again. The pendant was suffused with a magical glow and snatched from the table. Nurse Redheart stood next to it, a fore-hoof extended, which she pulled back as the pendant was whisked away.

Did I see that right? Was she about to take my pendant? Now Rarity had it. If she were friends with Twilight, and that princess wanted my pendant so badly, Rarity could just--

"Here you go, darling."

I tore my gaze from the nurse. The pendant floated between Rarity and I. "Uh, thanks."

"Allow me to put it back on for you." Rarity's magic slipped the open chain around my neck and brought the ends together. I heard a faint click as the clasp engaged. She looked back towards the door. "Nurse Redheart, are you leaving?"

The nurse turned towards us, smiling. "She seems to be in good hooves for the moment. Just stop by the nurse's station when you're done. Oh, and thank you for returning the pendant to her. I was just about to do it myself, but you saved me the trouble."

Rarity smiled and nodded before Nurse Redheart let herself out.

So my pendant was very nearly taken by a nurse, could have been taken by Rarity, and her and Fluttershy were two ponies doting over me who reminded me of my mother and Michelle.

I did not like where this was going. At all.

Author's Note

I am not a songwriter by any stretch of the imagination, but I did my best with Pinkie's little ditty.

Chapter 4 - Things Get Weird(er)

It became apparent that brushing my tail was going to take about as long as the mane. My tail hair was rather thick, though not quite as tightly curled. I felt an odd pinching sensation near the base of my tail and had to glance behind me to see that Rarity had grasped it in her magic, likely to prevent too much tugging on my hindquarters.

"I'm told that you can recall that you are from Manehattan," said Rarity.

"Yes, though I don't recall the exact area."

"No worries at all. There is hardly an area of Manehattan that I don't like myself."

So just how familiar was she with the place? How much could I fudge things? "Did you come from Manehattan originally yourself?"

"Oh, no, darling, I cannot count myself that fortunate," Rarity said with a chuckle. "I simply adore my visits there. I believe I would be quite at home if I had to live there."

"Though we're glad she doesn't," said Fluttershy with a small smile.

"I did like living in Manehattan," I said, which was an accurate reflection on my attitude towards New York. I may have let a wistful tone creep into my voice.

"Oh, I have no doubt about that. It is good to talk to somepony who has. I meet so few of those in Ponyville."

"Are you friends with the other ponies I've met?" I asked.

"If you mean those whom you met at Sweet Apple Acres, then, yes," said Rarity. "And Twilight, of course. I would miss them dreadfully if I ever did move."

"Fortunately her boutique in Ponyville is very successful," said Fluttershy.

"I am looking to open another in Canterlot if the right place opens up, but I fully intend to stay in Ponyville."

I took a wild guess and assumed "Canterlot" was someplace rather important given its similarity in name to the less puntasticly titled place from Earth legend. I wondered if that was the castle-like city I had seen on the way to the hospital.

I felt I had to contribute more to the conversation. I wanted to, actually. So I tried what I had thought of doing earlier: grafting my real life onto this world. "My mother started off in a small town but moved to Manehattan when I was really young and, well, never looked back."

She had actually moved to New York City, and she had built her fashion business there.

"My stars, raised in Manehattan?" Rarity said. "In that case, Ponyville will definitely be a change of pace for you."

That was for certain. I was never much for "country living" back on Earth. Maybe mentioning I had lived my childhood (foalhood?) there was a little too audacious, but I was tired of being an enigma.

I rather wished Fluttershy would talk more. If she was going to be a persistent reminder of Michelle, I wanted to know more about her. Maybe it would make the experience seem less uncanny. I supposed I was going to have to force the issue. "Fluttershy, what do you do?"

Fluttershy seemed surprised at the question. "Oh, um, me?"

"You live in Ponyville, too, right?"

"Yes, I do. I work with animals."

I paused, hoping she would follow that up, but nothing was forthcoming. Was she a veterinary, perhaps?

"Fluttershy is being quite modest," Rarity said. "She does wonders for the animals about Ponyville. I do not believe any other town could boast such a happy, healthy population of animals."

Fluttershy blushed but smiled.

Michelle had liked animals but had no such amazing skills. She had preferred to help other people, often at the expense of her own comfort. She had often fretted more about others than herself. She had been about as modest as Fluttershy as well. "So, how long did it take you to develop that skill?"

"Oh, it's a bit of a long story how I discovered my special talent, but it's what gave me my cutie mark."

So these marks were related to talents or skills? I supposed that explained Fluttershy's butterflies. Strange that Rarity's would be diamonds. If she were a dressmaker, I assumed it would be a needle and thread or something like that. It made sense for Applejack's apples and Pinkie Pie's balloons. I guessed stars represented magic. What was Rainbow's mark again? Something weather-related, I thought. That struck me as rather funny that a pony as brash as her would be a meteorologist.

I was still a bit wary. I was warming up to Rarity and Fluttershy more so than the other ponies, but something about this arrangement still seemed contrived, like some sort of outside force was manipulating me.

Rarity released the base of my tail, and the brush floated onto the table. "There you go, my dear. You are looking much better now, save for a bit of wildness to your mane, but that's nothing my stylist can't fix." She trotted over to the dresser and opened each drawer in turn with her magic. "Ah, here we go." She levitated a mirror from the drawer and brought it over to me.

She had indeed made my hair lay better. If I ignored the lurid colors, it actually looked quite nice. Especially the tail. The curls were indeed a little looser there, making it look like a wavy cascade that ended about half a foot from the floor.

I was torn between wanting to accept my new body and clinging to my remaining humanity. This was supposed to be the way I would be for the rest of my life, but that idea met with such defiance that I had no idea how to resolve it. At least I could give Rarity a sincere comment. "It does look better, thank you."

Rarity smiled and levitated the mirror to the table. I so wished I could do that.

"I am afraid we must take our leave of you now, dear," said Rarity. "But if you are okay with it, we can come back again tomorrow."

"I'd be fine with that," I said, again in all sincerity.

"It was a pleasure meeting you, and I hope you do get to feeling better."

"It was nice seeing you again," said Fluttershy with a soft smile. At least this time she seemed a little less put off by me. I wished I could claim quite as much improvement in my feelings towards her, but that was my problem. I must have managed not to let that show, for she kept her good demeanor.

"Same here," I said. "See you tomorrow."

Doctor Horse soon informed me that the afternoon would be the earliest they would run more tests. I thought I was going to be left with nothing to do except stare at the walls until the doctor levitated a book into my lap. "This is courtesy of Princess Twilight. It's one of her favorites, and she thought you might like it."

"Um, thanks," I said.

Like when I first heard the spoken language back in the apple orchard, my brain took a second to realign itself. What had been random symbols at first became legible text in a few seconds.

Seriously? The main character was named "Daring Do?"

The book was at least mildly engaging. This Daring Do seemed to be the pony equivalent of Indiana Jones. I was not much for action stories, but it was something to do. Granted, there were a lot of cultural references I just wasn't getting.

I did learn one thing: the name of this country (nation? empire?) was "Equestria."

I also learned that a common phrase to note surprise or shock was "by Celestia" or "in Celestia's name." Perhaps this "Celestia" was their deity. These ponies did not seem particularly religious, so maybe it was an old belief that wasn't practiced anymore. That would suit me fine. Last thing I needed was to violate some sacred rite out of ignorance.

I had to admit, the idea that a princess would enjoy the pony equivalent of pulp fiction was amusing. My mother had a rather sharp disdain for such things.

Eggs weren't on the menu for lunch. Oh, well. At least I liked vegetables and greens enough. Very soon after lunch, I was taken for the first of the tests that the doctor had ordered, and I was already anxious.

"This is not going to take very long, but could very well be of great assistance to you," said Doctor Horse. I was seated on my haunches on a cushion, a female unicorn with a creamy light brown coat and corn-silk mane standing next to me. The doctor gestured with a hoof towards her. "This is Doctor Lovely Memory. She's one of our experts on amnesia and other memory impediments."

Oh, fun. I should have realized they would do something like this.

"She is going to cast a spell on you that is designed to lift any memory blockages resulting from emotional trauma."

I tried not to let my nervousness show in my voice. "And if my memory loss is not from that? What happens?"

Lovely Memory spoke up. "No worries, it will simply have no effect in that case. I need to warn you, though. If this is indeed a trauma-based blockage, you will start to recall that trauma. The spell is designed to release it slowly to allow you time to cope, but Nurse Redheart will need to keep a close eye on you in case you need counseling."

I nodded. Of course, this was going to be a bust, but at least I had a time cushion where I could think of what to do in the meantime.

"There is, however, the matter of your pendant," said Doctor Horse.

Here we go. "I need to remove it?"

"I am afraid so. Nurse Redheart tells me you can indeed remove it yourself."

She must have told the doctor that she had seen me with the pendant's clasp undone.

"It is critically important nothing interferes with this spell," said Lovely Memory. "I do not wish to take the least bit of chance that any outside magic will interfere with it and possibly harm you as well."

I was about to rail yet again at the idea that this thing was even remotely magical when Doctor Horse said, "For example, your pendant ruined the X-rays we tried to take yesterday."

Was he serious? Or was this just some lie to get me to give up the pendant?

Lovely Memory moved to one side and revealed a small table where a half-sphere of what looked like shimmering glass lay around it. "This is a secure holding spell I cast. When a pony places something inside it, only that pony can retrieve it. Your pendant will be safe."

With my lack of knowledge of how magic worked here, they could very easily deceive me. I really didn't have any choice. If I still refused, I would definitely cast suspicion on myself.

"A-all right," I said. I trotted over to it and opened the clasp on the pendant after some fumbling. My hooves trembled, and I dropped it. The pendant suddenly glowed with Lovely Memory's magic and was placed back in my hooves.

"Um, thanks," I murmured sheepishly, my cheeks warm.

The half-sphere was actually an energy field. My hooves tingled a bit as they passed through it. After I deposited the pendant inside, Lovely Memory stepped over and tried to move her hoof through, but it was like it had become completely solid. I was still able to poke my own hoof through it.

"There, it should be nice and safe now," said Lovely Memory with a gentle smile.

"Thank you," I said as I returned to the cushion.

Lovely Memory levitated a parchment and a quill. "The spell also relays to me information concerning your mental functions, which I will be noting here. Rest assured that I will not be seeing any of your memories, and your thoughts will remain private. Ready?"

Not really, but I nodded anyway.

Lovely Memory's horn glowed. "You should feel no more than a mild tingling, if even that."

I did feel it, like a faint maddening itch just under my mane between my ears, but it was tolerable. Soon the quill started scratching across the parchment. I could see what she was writing, but it was a mix of medical and magical jargon I didn't understand. At least it proved she wasn't recording my thoughts.

This continued for a few minutes, so I guessed, before the glow in her horn faded. She lowered the parchment and quill, smiling at me. "All done!"

"That's it?"

"That's it."

"Ah, this appeared to go splendidly," said Doctor Horse. "Please note it will take at least a few hours before any memories become unlocked. Best you just rest for now when you get back to your room."

I trotted to where my pendant lay and put it back on. So maybe I had misinterpreted what Nurse Redheart was doing earlier? Where did caution end and paranoia begin?

"Perhaps later you would consent to another try at the X-rays," said Doctor Horse. "We can have a technician cast a secure holding spell for you there as well."

I managed a smile. "Thanks for understanding."

Nurse Redheart was waiting for me outside the testing room. "I do hope this goes well for you," she said with a gentle smile. "If for no other reason than we can learn what to call you."

I had to admit to toying with the idea of coming up with a "pony name" and claiming I had "remembered" it. Then again, where my exposure to pony names was limited to the few I had met and characters in a Daring Do book, that was not likely the best idea.

She escorted me to my room. "Perhaps you should consider taking a nap, dear."

"Oh, well, I'm not really all that tired," I said as I headed for the bed.

"Trust me, these sorts of things can quite exhaust you."

I saw something flicker at the edge of my vision, like a faint greenish light from somewhere behind me. When I turned to see what it was, my vision blurred for a moment, and I stumbled as a wave of weakness passed through me.

Nurse Redheart rushed forward, throwing a foreleg around me. "Oh, my, are you all right?"

My eyelids sagged. "Umm ... m-maybe you were right."

"Extreme sleepiness is an occasional side-effect of that spell."

I wished they had told me about this. One moment I was wide awake, the next I felt dead on my hooves.

"Here, let's get you into bed," I heard Nurse Redheart say, her voice sounding thick and muffled.

"Urm, yeah, okay," I murmured, barely cognizant of what I was saying.

I scarcely remembered Nurse Redheart drawing the sheet over me before I blacked out.

I stirred from a dreamless sleep. My head felt full of fuzz. Pain throbbed in my temples. I narrowed my eyes to force them to focus.

I could not tell how long I had been out, as the sunlight from the window had been replaced by a gray pall. As I became more lucid, I heard the gentle patter of rain. I felt a chill against my side and realized the sheet had slid from my body.

No, the sheet was torn.

This incongruity brought me to full wakefulness, and my eyes widened as I saw that the sheet was in tatters, as if it had been ripped apart. I gasped as I cast my gaze around the room. The table near the wall had been overturned, the mirror that Rarity had placed on it smashed. The dresser lay on its side, some of its drawers missing. As my eyes tracked across the room, I found them lying in pieces. Gouges on the wall suggested they had been hurtled against it. Light glittered off shards of glass in the doorway to the bathroom, hinting that the mirror had been shattered as well.

What the fuck?!

My head jerked up as the door glowed and opened, and my heart thumped as Princess Twilight stepped into the room, a deadly serious expression on her face. "Well, it appears to be just as bad as Nurse Redheart had said."

"Wh-what? I don't understand."

Twilight stepped more fully into the room and shut the door with another magical push. "She told me you had another episode with your uncontrolled magic. I almost didn't believe her when she said it was this bad."

"Wait a minute, I didn't do this!" I cried.

"Please, it's best to just admit what happened."

"I was asleep! The room was like this when I woke up!"

Twilight considered and sighed. "It's worse than I thought. You must not have been in your right mind and don't even remember doing it."

This was the alley all over again, being accused of something I had not done. "That's ridiculous."

"They told me you had a memory charm applied to you earlier."

"Well, yes, but--"

"And you had the pendant with you."

My hoof flew to it, pressing it against my chest. "I had taken it off."

"But it was still close by. It must be infused with magic, and it must be affecting you somehow. The memory charm only exacerbated that."

I swallowed hard. Could she be right? She was supposed to be the Princess of Magic. Maybe she had been telling me the truth all along, and this thing was a danger to me.

But, dammit, I would've remembered having an episode like this! Wouldn't I?

Twilight took a step towards me, and it took great effort not to retreat. Though where would I go? Even if I tried to run past her, she likely could use magic to stop me. I was trapped.

"I want to help you," Twilight said in a gentler voice. "But you have to trust me."

"Y-you want me to give you the pendant."

Twilight smiled. "I'm glad to see you finally understand."

I was trembling so badly the bed frame rattled. I pressed my hoof tighter to the pendant until it bit into my skin through my fur.

"The pendant is clearly a danger to you and potentially everypony around you," said Twilight. "Do you really want to be responsible for somepony getting hurt?"

Shit. I didn't ask for this. What had Michelle done to me? Had she even known this thing was magical? How could she? She was an ordinary human being like me.

No, like I had been. That part of my life was over, and it was time I accepted that. This stupid pendant was tying me to something I could never have again. Maybe without this pendant I would stop being special and be just another pony.

Before I could respond, my attention was drawn to a commotion in the hallway.

"Wait, stop, you need to talk to the nurse first before you visit!" came a distant voice from down the hall.

A rush of wind in the hallway rattled the door, and then a slightly raspy voice from right outside said, "Sorry, doc, too slow! Twilight can vouch for me anyway."

The door burst open. Great. Just what I needed now, that damn rainbow-maned pegasus.

"Twilight, there you are!" Rainbow Dash said, flying into the room and hovering before Twilight, her hindquarters towards me. I barely avoided being slapped in the muzzle by her prismatic tail. "I've been looking all over for you."

Twilight sighed. "Rainbow Dash, I am a bit busy at the moment."

"Look, I know you're still sore at me, but just listen, please!"

"This really needs to wait until later."

"But I just wanted to apologize for earlier. I talked to Spike, and he said you ..." Rainbow trailed off as her gaze swept the room. "Whoa, what the hay happened in here?!"

Twilight paused, then glanced past her pegasus friend. "Perhaps you can help. The filly here is still a little reluctant to give me her pendant."

Rainbow whirled around to face me, narrowing her eyes. "Oh, she is, huh?"

"She had a magical accident, which is what trashed the room."

Rainbow folded her fore-legs. "Accident. Sure. I believe that. Now try to sell me a bridge in Manehattan."

"I don't remember doing this!" I yelled. I was going to give up the pendant, but I didn't need this shit from her.

"Rainbow, I'm not blaming her," said Twilight. "All I care about is getting that pendant from her so nopony gets hurt."

"You heard her!" Rainbow said. "Cough it up!"

"G-give me a minute, please," I said.

"Why?"

I was almost in tears, but I refused to break down in front of her. "It means a great deal to me! I-it ... it's a symbol of a close friendship I once had."

I wasn't sure why I said that. I had not wanted to reveal any details concerning Michelle, but ... did her face soften just a touch?

"So just give me a moment to work up my courage, okay?" I snapped. "Or maybe you're so full of yourself you didn't notice I'm rather scared right now!"

I thought my insult would set her off again; I needed to vent, and she was a convenient target. I wanted her to argue with me, yet it seemed to have the opposite effect. She blinked a few times and rubbed a hoof through her mane. "Yeah, you do that," she said in a subdued voice. She turned to face Twilight. "Twilight, please, I want to say I'm sorry for earlier."

Twilight looked increasingly impatient. "Rainbow, it's fine, I forgive you."

"Wait, just like that?"

"Well, why not? We're friends, right?"

"But you yelled at me like I never heard you do before, and then you just teleported away. Spike said maybe you were still upset over the stuff that happened at Cadance's wedding even after all this time and--"

"Rainbow, not now. It's not important."

To be honest, I was barely listening to them. I pieced together that part of the conversation later. I was dealing with my own grief. I felt so terribly guilty. I had let Michelle down once before and was going to do so again.

"Hey."

I looked up. Rainbow had turned to face me again, still hovering. Did she ever actually walk like other ponies?

She glanced to the side. "I, uh, see you got the book Twilight sent."

I stared. "Huh?"

"The Daring Do book. I like them, too."

"Oh, um, it's okay, I guess."

Rainbow's eyes widened. "Just okay?! But ... er ... never mind."

"Look, do you want the pendant or--"

"I'm glad you like it because it was my idea to send it to you."

"Rainbow, she's going to give me the pendant," said Twilight. "Why are you prattling on about the book?"

"Did you hear what I said, Twilight? My idea to send the book."

"Yes, I heard. I thought you had a great idea back then, and I still do now."

I had tuned them out again. I started to manipulate the chain of my pendant. Suddenly, a cyan hoof nudged my own hooves down.

"Keep it," said Rainbow in a low voice.

"Huh? But I thought--"

What happened next was just a blur of motion. I could only deduce what transpired from the aftermath, when Twilight was abruptly lifted off her hooves and hurtled backwards. She smacked against the wall with enough force to crack the plaster. My jaw simply dropped as she slid down the wall, her hoof rubbing the side of her face.

Did Rainbow just deck her??

I barely had a chance to breathe when Rainbow lunged at the fallen princess, grappled with her, and threw her against the wall near the bathroom. Twilight fell atop the fallen dresser with a loud, wood-splintering crash. Rainbow turned to lunge again, but the princess was ready. I gasped as a bright beam of green light erupted from her horn, striking Rainbow and throwing her into the opposite wall.

"Gaaaah!" Rainbow cried until she struck the wall. The back of her head impacted with a sickening thud. She slid down the wall, groaning, her eyes skewed.

"What in Celestia's name is going on in here?!" cried Doctor Horse from the hallway as he appeared.

Twilight was on her hooves and charging for the door.

"Doctor, look out!" I screamed.

"Princess Twilight, what--?!" the doctor began.

Twilight shoved him aside with her magic and disappeared down the hall.

Rainbow shook her head violently and leaped into the air. "Stop her!" she bellowed as she disappeared in a colorful blur. A flash of green light illuminated the hallway for an instant before I heard Rainbow growl, "Rrrgh, she's gone!" In another prismatic blur, Rainbow was hovering before me again. "You all right? She didn't hurt you, did she?"

To say I was a little shocked was an understatement, not just from what happened but from the sincere concern in Rainbow's voice and eyes. Numbly, I nodded.

"What in Equestria just happened?" said Doctor Horse.

Rainbow whirled around to face him. "Doc, have somepony contact the Castle of Friendship! Get Twilight -- the real Twilight -- down here, fast!"

The real Twilight??

The doctor was similarly shocked. "Oh, heavens, d-don't tell me that was a changeling?!"

"Okay, I won't. Pretend it was a manticore if that makes you feel better. Just get Twilight down here!"

"I will, Miss Dash, but I insist you have one of the physicians attend to you. That was a nasty hit you took on the back of your head."

"Okay, okay! But have them do it in here, because I'm not leaving this filly alone until Twilight gets here. Ugh, I knew this summit was a bad idea!"

Doctor Horse sighed. "Very well, I will see to it at once."

Rainbow turned to face me. "Lucky for you, I have a thick head." She winced as she rubbed the back of her head. "In more ways than one."

I was too stunned to respond. What the fuck just happened?!

Chapter 5 - Change Of Scenery

Something has gone wrong. We don't seem to have an archived copy of that chapter.

Chapter 6 - A Binding Promise After All

"Here we are," said Twilight in a cheerful voice as she trotted ahead of me into the chamber.

Night had just fallen, and rather fast. One moment the sun was still suspended above the horizon in apparent perpetual sunset, and a few minutes later, not only had the sun completely set, the moon had risen and the stars were out. It was certainly a gorgeous night sky, stars far more brilliant than even the darkest moonless night on Earth, but it struck me as odd just the same.

The chamber I stepped into was located at one of the lower levels of the castle. It appeared to be a workroom of sorts, with devices powered by a combination of electricity and magic whose workings I could not fathom. Shelves were lined with scrolls, yellowed parchments, and thick books. Crystals of various colors were suspended inside glass containers.

Twilight turned to face me. "So all I want to do now is a quick scan of your pendant and ensure it has no obvious dangerous magicks associated with it. If it is indeed safe, I will return it to you."

"And if you think it's not safe?"

"It will remain here under a protective shield, and I will not move it anywhere without first telling you."

I had to trust her. I really had no choice. "Um, all right. What do you want me to do?"

Twilight trotted up to a pedestal in the center of the chamber. "Please place your pendant here, and then move back to the cushion just behind you. That should place you at a safe distance in case anything happens."

I fumbled with the pendant a little less this time. I was finally getting used to using my hooves. I had the pendant off in less than a minute. Despite the trust I was trying to develop with her, I still hesitated before placing the pendant on the pedestal.

"Thank you," said Twilight. "I know this is difficult for you. I promise to be as gentle as possible with it."

I nodded and retreated to the cushion, which seemed a mile away. I sat on my haunches and tried not to look anxious.

Twilight lighted her horn. "I can already tell I was right that this is infused with magic."

"I honestly never knew it was," I said.

"You must have been unfortunate enough to be around those who simply were not at all sensitive to outside magic."

Yeah, about six billion of them. "I guess so."

The pendant itself began to glow, but not quite in the same way as when it was levitated. I flicked my tail nervously as I watched.

"Hmm," Twilight murmured. The glow brightened. "Well, good news is, whatever magic is contained within, it's very stable. This has to have been made by a very accomplished mage. So that eliminates the chance of random misfires."

"What about this Starswirl pony you talked about?" I asked.

"Oh, this could very well be one of his," Twilight said, the excitement in her voice evident. "Yes, there indeed is something about this pattern of enchantment that reminds me of his work on using thaumic matrices to store and manipulate unusual forms of energy."

I nodded, but I truly had no idea what she was talking about. All I knew of its origins was some vague reference by my mother to it being handed down through a few generations. She had revealed that only after I had pressed her about it one day for whatever reason. Given how cheap the pendant looked -- well, at least back on Earth -- I had never really believed her. I had assumed it was just a fib to make the pendant have more intrinsic value to the young child that I had been.

Twilight slowly stepped around the pedestal, her horn flickering a moment before growing bright again. "Oh, that's curious! It has an anti-tampering mechanism, and a very strong one."

"Um ... is that good?"

"In terms of unwanted magical discharge by simply handling it or even casting random spells at it, yes, indeed. Unfortunately it will make determining its exact purpose a little harder."

Twilight appeared to concentrate, the glow from her horn growing brighter and dimmer in seemingly no particular pattern. "Now this is very odd."

So much for the "quick scan" she had originally stated. "What's wrong?"

"I am finding no means to activate the magic within. Most artifacts have a specific trigger, you see, whether it be a spoken word, a gesture, inserting it into something else, and so on. I can find no indication of a trigger."

"Well, could that be good? I mean, nopony can activate it by accident, so it's still safe."

"But it's strange, don't you think?"

"Um, I guess?"

"Why would a magical artifact be created like this with no means to activate it?"

I had no idea, and I really didn't care. I was growing worried, as the more Twilight spoke, the more she sounded like a little kid on Christmas morning working her way around to the giant present in the back.

Then again, should I have been worried? It was not like she was going to try to activate it and see what happened. That would be like incanting a potentially powerful spell without knowing what it did first. Surely she was smart enough not to do that.

Twilight paused and lowered her head slightly. "Wait ... I think ... yes, some part of this is designed to draw in energy of some sort. Perhaps I can follow that path to see the internal structure."

Or, then again ...

"That is exactly its purpose. Yes, I can see the thaumic matrix. Classic Starswirl technique! This is amazing! This is truly a previously undiscovered artifact of his! But what kind of energy does it store? The leyline anchors are most unusual."

The pendant was starting to glow brighter than her horn. "Um, Twilight, do you really think you--"

"I almost have it ... I can almost see it ..."

The pendant glowed brighter still and began vibrating. "Twilight??"

"Just a little further and ... and ... OH!!"

The glow on her horn died with a sizzling snap, and she was suddenly thrown backwards. She fell on her back with a loud thump.

"Twilight!" I cried, bolting to my hooves and galloping over to her. "Are you all right?!"

Twilight struggled to right herself. "I was pushed back!" she said in a voice of both shock and amazement. "Something pushed me back!"

"Well, you said it had an anti-tamper thing on it, right?" I said as she righted herself. Smoke still wafted from her horn, the tip of which glowed incendiary red. "Twilight, y-your horn, it's--"

She licked a fore-hoof and pressed it to her horn. The glow disappeared with a brief sizzle. "Just some mana blowback. I'll be fine in a minute or two. And, no, this was not a mere anti-tamper spell. My magic was forcibly pushed out of the artifact. It must have something to do with the function of the artifact itself."

I swallowed. "But ... i-it's safe, right?"

Twilight looked at me. "I'm sorry?"

"You said if it's safe, I could have it back."

"Oh, yes, of course, but ... well, whatever this is, it's potentially very powerful."

"But it's safe."

Twilight sighed. "With regards to your safety as to the magic contained inside the artifact, yes. But if it is this powerful, wearing it will make you a target."

"I thought you and the other princesses could protect me. Has that changed?"

"Well, no, of course not."

"Then I think maybe you just want the excuse to keep studying this thing, and I'll never get it back."

Yeah, I was telling off a princess. Maybe it would turn out to be the stupidest thing I had ever done, but I was upset. I didn't always think when I was emotional.

Because if I had been thinking, I would have realized that Twilight had a point. Wearing that pendant now would be like hanging a gold bar around my neck and taking a stroll in a crime-ridden neighborhood back home. The gold bar was inherently safe, but it made me a target for theft, and not every thief cared whether their victims lived or not.

Yet it made the emotional impact of parting from it no less.

My mother was the one who first gave it to me, back when I was five and her fashion industry was going through a very tough time. She knew it was cheap -- her vague claims later that it was some sort of heirloom notwithstanding -- and hoped I would not notice. It wouldn't have mattered if I had. I saw it as a symbol of her love for me, and that was all that mattered.

I gave that pendant to Michelle when I was thirteen shortly after my mother's death from a drug overdose. I was so very distraught at the time. Michelle helped me like no other friend ever had. I gave her that pendant as a sign of that friendship. She knew it was inherently a worthless trinket, but she also knew how much it meant to me. She almost refused to accept it.

Then it came back to me after she died.

"Even if you leave the artifact down here--" Twilight began.

"Pendant!" I cried. "It's not some exotic magical artifact to me. It's a pendant, an important keepsake."

"I'm sorry," Twilight said in a soft voice. "Even if you leave the pendant down here, it is still yours. I will not give it to anypony else. I can put it under a powerful protection spell, stronger than the holding spell they used in the hospital. In fact ..." She smiled. "... I'll go further. I'll make you a Pinkie Promise."

I blinked. "A Pinkie ... Promise?"

"It's hard to break. It has magic even I don't understand. So, I pledge that this pendant will remain yours and will not be given to anypony else. Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye."

I couldn't help it. I giggled.

Twilight turned to the pedestal. "Let's see, horn recovered?" She levitated the pendant back to the center of the pedestal. "Good. Now then ..."

Her horn glowed, and a half-sphere of energy formed over the pedestal. "There. About the only pony who can get past that is Princess Celestia."

I nodded and managed a small smile. "Thank you." I reached up with a hoof to where the pendant once rested against my chest. "It will feel funny being without it."

"I do hope I can return it to you, perhaps after the summit is over and the immediate danger has passed," said Twilight. "Now, I have one more thing I need to do, and you can head back to your room."

"Oh?"

"I'm sorry to do this, but it's necessary given what happened. I want to cast a spell that will reveal whether you are a changeling or not."

My eyes widened. "But I'm not--!"

"I know you're not," Twilight said quickly. "But we're doing this on everypony. I'll be casting it on my friends as well. It's a precaution only, and I don't want to be seen as playing favorites."

Was that why Applejack was always looking at me funny? And why Rainbow Dash was initially suspicious of me? I guess if it allayed their fears, it was worth it. "A-all right. Will this hurt?"

Twilight smiled as she stepped back. "Not at all, but it may tingle a little. Now, hold still."

She charged her horn. I indeed felt a vague pins-and-needles sensation start at my hooves and sweep upwards. Where the spell touched me, a dark shadow lay over that part of my body. The black was covered in many tiny purple sparkles, like glitter on dark velvet. Scattered among them, however, were a few red sparkles. They followed no pattern, just a random crimson point here and there.

When she was done, Twilight paused, looking thoughtful.

"S-something wrong?" I asked.

"Let me do that again."

Once more she swept the spell over me. Once more I saw lots of purple sparkles with some scattered red.

"Well?" I asked.

Twilight smiled. "You're not a changeling, but we already knew that. Sorry, had to adjust my magic a bit. It's a relatively new spell, and I'm still working out some of the kinks. Here, let me take you back to your room."

While I was grateful to know I was really a pony (how ironic is that) I could not help but feel like something else had just happened that Twilight had not expected.

After I returned to my room and Twilight was away, I made another attempt to figure out how to use my horn. Maybe Twilight had been right all along and the pendant was interfering with my magic.

I used a pillow from the bed, figuring if it got flung across the room, at least it wouldn't break anything. After getting nothing but sparks from my horn in the first few attempts, I managed to knock it to the floor in a random direction. I tried to lift it back up to the bed, but all it did was quiver a bit. When I pushed harder like I had in the hospital, a seam burst, and feathers went flying.

I sighed and shoved the damaged pillow and escaped feathers under the bed with my hooves. Since the doctor had said my horn was healthy, that meant only one thing: I needed somepony to actually teach me how to do this.

I probably should not have tried it when I was already so tired, but it was the only time when I was sure Twilight would be too busy to check on me. She had told me she needed to host a meeting that evening. I had responded that I was going to read for a bit and then head on to sleep.

I did not get much further in the Daring Do book before I felt too drowsy to continue as the excitement of the day and my ill-timed magic-wielding attempt caught up with me. My mane suddenly felt odd, like something had fallen into it, but I assumed I was just tired and my perceptions were wonky.

Thoughts of sleep flew from my head when I was jolted back to full alertness by the sound of a distant, thunderous crash.

My heart thumped, and my hoof automatically reached for the pendant that was not there, which itself caused another spike of panic before I remembered leaving it Twilight's lab. I debated as to whether to investigate the noise. Technically nopony told me I had to stay in my room or that certain parts of the castle were off limits to me.

Curiosity got the best of me, and I ventured out of my room. The clopping of my hooves echoed rather eerily through the empty hall. My mother had lived in a mansion during the heyday of her career, but it had been nowhere near this big. Once I got to the end of the guest hall, I realized I did not quite remember from which direction Spike had led me.

I tried anyway, figuring so long as I kept the layout in my head enough to get back to my room, I would not get lost. This became a moot point when I heard a sharp, shrill scream.

I took off at full gallop, though my attempt to follow a straight line path to where I thought the scream had originated was thwarted by the convoluted layout of the castle. I blundered into a dining hall, a kitchen, and a library before winding up in a lobby before a set of tall doors. I heard faint, muffled voices from beyond them.

I trotted up to the doors and raised a fore-hoof to knock but hesitated. I instead turned my head and pressed my ear to one of them.

"--will just get evasive or defensive," said a voice I thought was Rarity. "I suspect the same would be true in this case as well."

"But she's more mature than that, isn't she?" came Fluttershy's voice.

Twilight's voice followed. "Still, I think Rarity has a point. Let's not put her on the spot. We'll wait for now and--"

I pulled my ear from the door and took a step back, my heart hammering. I tried not to assume the worst, that they were talking about me. I should not have been listening in on their private matters, anyway. If Twilight had wanted me at that meeting, she would have said so.

I was about to turn away when the doors burst open. "Oh, hello!" said a smiling Pinkie Pie.

I stared. Her pink fur and hair were splotched with powdery white.

Twilight appeared beside her. "Oh, um, hi," she said, clearly not expecting to see me. "Is there something wrong? Did you need something?"

"Um ... I just ... s-sorry, I heard something like a crash and then a scream, and ..."

I trailed off, my eyes widening. Fluttershy had appeared, her coat also splotched with white. She had something sticking out of her mane. It was a little plushie unicorn that looked like, well, me. My jaw dropped when Rarity appeared. Why in God's name was she dressed in a frilly green maid outfit, her mane and tail done into tight buns?

And that white powder looked like ... flour??

"Uh ..." I said as my brain sputtered. "What ... why ...??"

Rarity sighed as she trotted forward. "Pay no mind to all this, darling. We, ah, had an unexpected incident at the meeting. And, yes, I know, this outfit clashes horribly with my hair. And these awful frills!" She shivered violently. "So last season. It was not exactly my choice."

I nodded slowly. I glanced past her and caught a glimpse of a grumbling Spike as he used a broom to sweep up more flour on the floor of the chamber beyond. I only just caught sight of what looked like a large, round table and some high-backed chairs arranged around it before Applejack and Rainbow Dash appeared and blocked the view.

All six of them were here for this meeting? Were they all on some sort of community council or town board? I would hardly think a princess would be running something so mundane.

"Everything is okay," said Fluttershy. "That was very kind of you to check on us."

This was one of those cases where I both wanted and did not want to know what had happened at that meeting. For all I knew, this apparent strangeness was part of some odd Equestrian cultural practice, and it would be best if I did not express too much ignorance.

Then again, whatever had happened could have been magic-related, given Twilight's propensity for pushing her curiosity a little too far, if the incident with the pendant was typical for her.

I forced a small smile. "Well, so long as everypony is okay, I can just head back to my--"

Pinkie Pie suddenly surged forward. "Oo, you have a surprise for us?" she said with an eager smile.

"Huh? What to you mean?"

She giggled. "You're hiding something!"

My heart raced. "I'm not!"

"Oh, yes, you aaaare!" Pinkie sang. "It's right there in your mane. What is it? Did you bring us some goodies to eat?"

I just stared at her. By now she had drawn the curiosity of the others. I raised a hoof to my mane. "Really, I have no idea what ... you ..." My eyes widened as my hoof touched something small and solid buried in my curls.

"Come on, let's see it!" Pinkie chirped as she reached her own hoof to my mane and plucked something out of it. "Aw, it's just a pendant."

Twilight gasped. "Wait, what?!"

I was just as shocked. Hanging from Pinkie's hoof by the chain was my pendant.

"But we had left that in the lab!" Twilight said.

"I know!" I cried. "I-I didn't take it back! I didn't go anywhere near the lab after we left!"

"I believe you."

"Please, you have to ... um ... you do?"

Twilight took the pendant from Pinkie in her magic. "Just to be safe, I had placed an additional spell on the pedestal to warn me if anypony attempted to take the artifact. Since it never triggered, the artifact -- I'm sorry, the pendant -- must have returned itself to you." She looked at me. "Do you ever recall that happening before?"

I was going to answer in the negative until I remembered once when I was a child, about a year after my mother had first given it to me. I had gone on a trip with her and had accidentally left the pendant at home. The maid even confirmed over the phone that it was right there on my dresser. The next morning, I found it in my luggage. My mother had reprimanded the maid for being so badly mistaken, but the maid swore that she had seen it.

"Maybe once," I said. "But at the time I thought I was mistaken about leaving it at home."

"What does this mean, Twi?" Applejack asked.

"It means this has some sort of rather powerful binding magic associated with it," said Twilight. "As long as this filly is considered the pendant's owner, it cannot be separated from her."

I swallowed hard. "You mean, I can't get rid of it even if I tried?"

"Binding magic like this can be broken only if you willingly give up ownership of the pendant to another," Twilight said. "Then it likely becomes bound to them in turn."

"So that's what the changeling was trying to do?" Rainbow asked.

"Yes, the changeling was trying to frighten her into willingly giving it up."

"It almost worked," I said in a small voice.

"Didn't ya say the changelin' tried ta snatch it while she was Nurse Redheart?" said Applejack. "Don't make sense if it woulda jus' come right back to her."

"Maybe I was mistaken about that," I said. "It was hard to tell."

"Or the changeling didn't know about the binding magic at the time," said Twilight. She turned towards me. "If you still want me to keep this separated from you, the only way I can do it is if you willingly give it up to me. There's no other way. Maybe with a great deal of time and research I can find a way to break the binding magic, but not anytime soon."

I stared at the pendant. As much danger as it now represented, I still found it hard to give up, especially to somepony who I only just started to get to know. Maybe I could more easily give it to somepony like Fluttershy or even Rarity, but if that would put them in danger, I couldn't live with myself if something happened to them.

I already felt responsible for Michelle's death. I didn't want another on my conscience.

"I think I know what your answer is," Twilight said softly.

I swallowed and nodded. She gently fit the chain around my neck, and I heard a faint click.

"The clasp closed by itself," said Twilight. "It definitely still wants to belong to you."

Fluttershy drew near and gave me a hug. "It's okay, Twilight won't let anything happen to you."

"Twi, are ya sure there ain't nothin' else ya can do?" Applejack said.

"Not really, not before the summit," said Twilight.

"An' there ain't no other way to break this here bindin' magic ya were talkin' about?"

Twilight paused a long moment. "There is only one other way it can be broken," she said in a somber voice. "And that's with the death of the pony it's bound to."

The other ponies gasped. I felt my blood turn to ice.

"She won't let that happen!" Fluttershy said, her voice quavering despite its conviction.

"Certainly not!" Rarity said as she stepped before me. "You can count on Twilight. She has always come through for all of us."

"An' we all try to come through fer her," said Applejack. "We'll help any way we can."

"Yeah, we won't let that flying bag of ugly touch a single hair on your mane!" Rainbow Dash said.

I would have been more touched by this outpouring of support if I were still not feeling guilty over what I was still keeping from them. I again debated as to whether to tell them or not. Would they be so keen on helping me if they knew I was not really one of them?

Like in the alley, I was still a coward. I decided to wait a little longer. Get past this damn summit and the immediate danger -- like Twilight had said earlier -- and then we could talk when my life was not riding on their continued good nature.

Michelle, you likely never intended to put me through all this trouble, but I still hope it will be worth it in the end.

Chapter 7 - What's In A Name?

I am human.

The thought is an odd one. Perhaps I am simply reminding myself that no matter how much I have been lurching through life on automatic since my mother died, I am still a human being with desires and ambitions. Yet that does not explain why I stand in the middle of this urban blight, where pale artificial light glimmers off brackish puddles, and grime hangs in the air like a miasma. What could possibly--

My cell phone warbles. Compared to the sepulchral dimness, the light from my phone is like a blazing sun. Yet I need not squint to read the text message glowing in stark black.

please come quick if you want to see

What?

It ... it makes no sense. See what? Come to where? I don't even know where exactly I am.

No, wait! This is from Michelle! I've been trying to reach her all day! This is her apartment building!

"Michelle, I'm coming!" I yell as I bolt towards the door.

I take the stairs two at a time. It comes rushing back to me: Michelle shacking up in drug lord territory; the rumors about me on drugs; her refusing to answer texts or calls. Why did I not come sooner? Why was I standing out there on the street like a confused fool?

I leap off the stairs and hit the hallway at a dead run. I am almost at the door to Michelle's apartment when the hallway suddenly stretches, and my legs ache just from the effort to keep the ground I have already gained. Somehow, I manage to overtake it, and I am finally before the door. I am about to pound on it when I hear Michelle's voice.

"I love you ... I love you s-so much, l-like the little sister I never had ... b-but ..."

My eyes widen. Who is she talking to? I know she cared about me, but she never expressed anything like that. I knew of several other friends she had, but I had no idea she felt that way towards any of them.

"B-but ... you're ... you're d-doing something to me ... I don't know what it is ... wh-why ..."

"Michelle!" I scream. I start pounding on the door. "Michelle! Are you all right?! What's happening??"

I hear a loud thud, like something heavy -- or someone -- falling to the floor. I back up and throw my shoulder at the door, but it feels like hitting a brick wall.

"Why are you doing this to me?!" Michelle wails, and I have no more time. I need to get in. My heart is racing. I can't fail her again! I need to (SEE) get in before it's too late! "I thought you were my friend!"

I kick the door. I want to scream. I want to (SEE) reach her in time!

The door finally yields, and I burst inside. I gasp as I realize someone is standing ...

...

... no, wait ... I thought ...

There is no one but my friend, lying on the floor, writhing among the detritus of a drug addiction I never knew she had. It makes little sense, but these things never do. I drop to my knees by her side, but there is nothing I can do for her. She's dying, and it's my fault for not seeing the warning signs, for not reaching her in time.

Again.

I learned nothing from my mother's death. I likely had turned as much a blind eye towards Michelle as I had towards my mother. Now I sit crying by my dead friend clutching a useless pendant in my trembling hands.

I am back on the street again. I don't run this time. I let the pursuers close with me. Maybe this time they'll get it right. I tuck my head down to let the darkness take me.

The footsteps suddenly cease. I see silvery brilliance out of the corner of my eye. I lift my tear-stained face to a heavenly starry expanse and a bright silver moon. I flinch as I hear a clop of hooves.

I swallow hard and look to the side. A midnight blue alicorn gazes down at me.

"I still do not know what you are," she says softly. "But you are tortured by something you cannot grasp."

I slowly stand. "I-I ... what?"

"It is most odd. I cannot fathom what force is trying to help you. There is something strangely familiar about it, yet very ... alien."

I swallow hard. "I'm b-being helped?"

"Yes, but by what or who, I do not know." She pauses and takes a step closer. "But I do know who is preventing you from being helped."

"Who?"

"You."

My eyes flew open.

The room was dark, save for a single moonbeam which bathed the blanket in pale radiance. The moon itself was like a large baleful silver eye, cast down as if in judgment.

You are your only judge.

"What?!" I called out. "Who's there?! I ..."

This time I saw it.

I almost fell on my muzzle in my mad scramble to get out of bed and to the window. It was not an illusion. Right there, superimposed on the moon was the head of a midnight blue pony with a long tapering horn. As I stared in no small amount of awe and fear, it faded from view.

I stumbled back into bed, breathing hard, my heart pounding. If this had been Earth, I would be convinced that I was going insane. But on a world that itself seemed insane, I had no idea what to think, other than the possibility that the pony in my dream was real.

That scared me more than anything the dream itself could conjure.

I next awoke to sunlight.

I had no idea what time it was, as the room did not have a clock. From as bright as it was outside, it must have been some way into the morning. The dream seemed no less surreal by the light of day, but it had lost some of its edge. I could at least function without brooding over the imagery or the identity of that pony.

I managed to shower well enough unassisted. Using the hair-dryer was a bit of a challenge despite the handle being designed for hooves. I got myself dry, but my mane and tail were a bit poofy. I really needed to learn basic pony grooming. I never had this much hair to deal with in my life.

After putting the pendant back on, I was about as ready as I was going to be to face my third day as a pony. I opened the door and stepped into the hall.

"Good morning, Miss."

I flinched and stumbled back from the deep voice that sounded from my immediate left, my gaze falling on a rather muscular pegasus stallion wearing golden armor, one fore-leg curled around a long spear. I very nearly backed into his cohort, who flanked my door on the other side.

"Sorry to startle you, Miss," said the first pegasus. "You were still asleep when we were posted here and had orders not to wake you."

"There you are, sleepyhead!" came a familiar bubbly voice from down the hall.

I stepped away from the door and gazed down the passage. Pinkie Pie stood a short distance away, and next to her was Rarity (thankfully sans maid outfit and her hair back to normal). "Good morning, darling," said Rarity with a smile. She was levitating a rolled-up banner into place above the next door down. "Did you have a good rest?"

"Good morning," I said. "Um, yeah, more or less."

Rarity finished hooking the ends of the banner, giving it one final magical nudge to unroll it. A stylized yellow sun stood against a field of sky blue. "Give us a few minutes to finish with the decorations, and we can all head to the dining room for breakfast."

"And then we're gonna go into town after that!" Pinkie Pie said, bouncing once.

"I thought I had to stay in the castle for the duration of the summit," I said.

Rarity moved to the next door further down. I trotted a short distance to follow. The two pegasi guards followed, staying in formation just behind me. A second rolled-up banner glowed in Rarity's magical grip as she spoke. "The summit does not officially start until this afternoon when all the delegates arrive, so we have some time. Besides, you ought to have your mane and tail styled properly in case you run into somepony important."

I would have been perfectly content to stay holed up in my room for the duration.

"And this way you get to see Ponyville!" Pinkie said. "But we do have to take care of one eensie little thing before we go."

Rarity levitated the second banner into place. "Are you still going to insist on that this morning?"

"But what if we meet some of our friends? I need some way to introduce her."

"I really think we should wait to hear if Mayor Mare has discovered any information on her."

The banner unrolled. I would have only glanced at it if it had not been a large crescent moon set against midnight blue. Please let that be a coincidence.

"But I got the book here and everything," said Pinkie.

I tore my gaze from the banner in time to see Pinkie reach into her mane and pull out a book far larger than anything I thought could be hidden in a mane. The title of the book was "The Puntastic Guide to Foal Naming (Second Edition) by Pinkamena Diane Pie."

Oh, dear God.

Wait. Diane? Why the hell did that name translate to Equestrian and not Rachel??

Rarity trotted over to us. "Very well, but only if she consents to it." She turned to me. "So it's up to you. Would you like Pinkie to try to come up with a name? I do admit, it would be nice to have a form of address for you."

I had to agree with that sentiment myself. How bad could this be? I had already heard and read some rather silly names and nopony seemed to bat an eye at them. "Well, as long as I get to approve it."

"Of course, dear," said Rarity.

"Yippee!" Pinkie cried. She plopped herself down on her haunches and opened the book. "Hmm, let's see, important info first." She eyed me. "Blue fur, red and orange hair, sixteen, no cutie mark, from Manehattan, it's a Tuesday--"

Tuesday? What did that have to do with--

"--it's sunny, we're having pancakes for breakfast, some fruit on the side, pastries ... mmm, pastries ... sweet, tasty pastries ..."

"Pinkie, dear, please focus," said Rarity.

"Hey, this is all important stuff!" said Pinkie. She glanced at the book before looking at me. "Fruit Pastry!"

I glanced helplessly at Rarity.

Rarity rolled her eyes. "Pinkie, please, get on with it."

"I did!" Pinkie chirped. "Fruit Pastry is a great name!"

"Uh, no," I said.

"Try again, dear," said Rarity.

"Sweet Pastry, maybe?" Pinkie suggested.

"I don't think so," I said.

"Sweet Fruit?"

"No."

"Fruity Sweets?"

"Um, no."

"Fruity Orange?"

"Huh?? No!"

"Orange Cherry?"

"I don't think--"

"Cherry Delight?"

"No."

"Cherry Booty?"

"What?? No!"

"Cherry Mint?"

"That doesn't even make--"

"Minty Fresh?"

"Pinkie, stop--"

"Fresh Fruit!"

"STOP!"

Pinkie pouted, and her hair actually seemed to deflate slightly. "Aw, I was just getting to the really good names."

Rarity peered down at the book. "Pinkie, are all these names based on food?"

"Well, heehee, maybe I was a little hungry when I wrote the book."

I face-hoofed. "Look, Pinkie, I appreciate this, but maybe this isn't going to work."

"I agree," said Rarity. "We should focus on more important matters." She turned to me. "For instance, despite the fact that we're going to the stylist this morning, I am tempted to help you brush your mane into something more manageable."

"I dunno, I kinda like her poofy look," Pinkie said as she closed the book.

"It just makes the colors seem all over the place."

"Oo, but I like it that way. Looks kinda swirly. Reminds me of these little candies we make at Sugarcube Corner sometimes. Cherry and orange fruit flavors all swirled together. Mmm, they're really good!" Pinkie suddenly gasped, and her hair popped out to full inflation. "That's it! I've got it! The perfect name for her! Candy Swirl!"

I blinked.

Candy Swirl?

Candy Swirl??

Okay, you know what? That's not half bad, especially compared to the other names. I used to know a girl named "Candy" back on Earth, so at least it wasn't totally alien.

Rarity smiled. "That actually does sound like a rather lovely name."

And the refined Rarity liked it. Sold. "I'm good with that, then."

"In that case, I suggest we head over to the dining hall."

Pinkie slipped the book into her mane. "Oh, but what about a banner for Queen Chrysalis' room?"

"Nopony can tell me if the changelings even have a flag," said Rarity. "I will see if I can put something together at the boutique while we're in town later. I was lucky to do what I have on such short notice."

"Short notice?" I asked.

"The summit was originally supposed to take place in Canterlot. Queen Chrysalis decided to change the venue to the Castle of Friendship two days ago." She paused. "I have to admit, I do wonder why Twilight did not ask me to help with the preparations when it was in Canterlot."

"She didn't ask me, either," said Pinkie. "Yeah, that was kinda strange."

"Well, I'm sure she had a good reason. Shall we go?"

The two guards were apparently not assigned to my room, but to me, personally. They followed me to the dining room and stood watch just outside the door. Other armored pegasi and some unicorns patrolled the hallways.

Twilight was already at the table, enjoying a cup of tea. After Rarity, Pinkie, and I took our places, that left only one more seat, which I assumed was for Spike given it was higher than the others.

"Will Fluttershy not be joining us?" Rarity asked.

"Well, it is Tuesday," said Twilight.

"Hmph! Considering what happened at the meeting last night, it would serve him right for her to cancel their weekly tea."

"Yes, but you know her, she won't."

"But she will miss out on the spa treatment." Rarity said. "I suppose it cannot be helped. We'll stop by her place afterward and see if she wants to join us."

"Somepony has a new naaaame!" Pinkie sang.

Twilight glanced at me. "Oh, did you remember your name?"

"Er, no, but Pinkie helped pick out one," I said.

"Go on, tell her!" Pinkie said, nudging me with her hoof. "You gotta start getting used to it!"

"The name we came up with was, uh, Candy Swirl."

I felt a little ridiculous saying it, but Twilight smiled. "That sounds like a perfectly fine name for you, Candy."

Hearing myself called that was even weirder, but I smiled just the same. "Thank you."

"Spike will have breakfast out in a few minutes. Would you like some tea in the meantime?"

Still no coffee? Maybe they didn't have that in Equestria. Then again, considering the perpetual manic energy machine in the shape of a pink mare that was Pinkie Pie, perhaps coffee was banned just to prevent her from getting her hooves on caffeine. I wanted something hot, so tea it was. "Yes, please."

"Some tea for me as well, Twilight, thank you," said Rarity. "So, Candy, dear -- so nice to finally have a name to call you by -- I thought I would show you my boutique after we are done with your spa treatment and mane styling. Hopefully Fluttershy can join us then."

"Oh, sure, I'd like to see it," I said as Twilight levitated cups before Rarity and I. I really was curious, to be honest.

"In fact, I would like to make something for you in case you wanted to attend any formal functions during the summit."

Well, that at least explained when ponies wore clothing. "I don't want to put you to a lot of trouble."

"Oh, it's no trouble at all."

"I really wasn't planning on any formal functions, to be honest," said Twilight as she poured tea into our cups in turn with her magic.

"Nonsense, darling, you have to have at least one formal dinner. How else are you going to introduce Candy to the princesses?"

"Um, really, I would not mind staying holed up in my room," I said.

Not that I was a stranger to formal functions. My mother had held them a lot. As I got older, I actually enjoyed attending them. By the time I was eleven, I started looking forward to them.

"But how are you going to have your cake and other goodies if you stay in your room?" Pinkie asked.

"I would just skip dessert, I guess?"

Pinkie gasped. "Skip dessert?? After you had to miss so many of them when you were out on the streets? You need extra desserts just to catch up!"

I had a feeling if I hung out with Pinkie too much, I would either seriously put on weight or be on a constant sugar rush.

"Besides, Twilight, wouldn't it be safer to have Candy and her pendant where she has many eyes on her?" said Rarity. "It would be a lot harder for any shenanigans to happen in that case."

Twilight sighed as she set down the teapot. "Rarity, I'm already feeling a little frazzled trying to keep track of everything else for the summit. I don't have time to prepare for a formal dinner!"

"Oh, I can take care of it, Twilight," said Pinkie. "Mr. and Mrs. Cake would be glad to help out, too."

"There you go, problem solved," Rarity said with a smile as she lifted her teacup with her magic.

I looked down at mine. I had not planned this out well. I felt silly asking for a straw for tea. Certainly there was a way to do this. Earth ponies and pegasi must have to do this all the time. Pinkie had held that book of hers between her hooves so easily earlier, so ...

Okay, I felt dumb. I had to stop thinking like a human and start thinking like a pony. The fact that the cup did not have the little ringlet for a finger should have given me a clue that I just had to use one more than the usual number of appendages to lift it.

"Is there a problem, dear?" Rarity said.

"Huh? Oh, no, I'm fine," I said. I carefully closed both my fore-hooves around the cup. It took a few tries to get the cup positioned correctly so that I had a good grip on it, but I managed to lift it and take a sip. It tasted ... flowery. That was the best way to describe it. Maybe infused with a bit of honey. I actually liked it.

"Candy, have you tried using your magic when you're not wearing your pendant?" Twilight asked. "When I examined it yesterday, I realized the reach of its magical energy does not extend that far. A few feet should be enough to eliminate any interference."

"Uh, no, I haven't tried that," I lied. "I promise I will later."

"I don't see any rush," said Rarity. "She is perfectly capable of using her hooves."

I silently thanked Rarity for the save. I really was starting to like her about as much as I did Fluttershy. Though I sensed Twilight had been hoping for the change in topic. She was sounding a little stressed out. I tried to help her a bit. "So will these guards be with me outside the castle as well?"

"Yes, you'll have two guards assigned to you at all times until the summit is over," said Twilight.

"Oo, but how do we know they're not changelings?" Pinkie asked.

Despite all her craziness, Pinkie Pie sometimes managed to say something insightful. I had been thinking the exact same thing.

"Not to worry," said Twilight. "I am going to be using my detection spell on everypony who enters the castle. I used it to scan every guard who arrived earlier this morning."

That definitely made me feel better.

"That reminds me. I heard from Mayor Mare earlier that the sheriff's stallions found the real Nurse Redheart. She's safe and sound now, but doesn't remember what happened to her."

"Oh, good!" Rarity said. "I was concerned for her myself."

"I'm glad to hear she's okay," I said. "She really was nice to me that first day at the hospital."

"I'll have to make sure to go cheer her up later!" said Pinkie.

"Breakfast is ready!" Spike called out from the kitchen.

I was glad to hear that, as now I was talking simply to drown out my rumbling stomach. I had to admit, the equine sense of smell was amazing. Pancakes had never smelled so good.

I did get a little self-conscious when I saw Rarity delicately eating her breakfast with a fork she held so expertly with her magic, carefully avoiding getting even the least speck of syrup or fruit on her muzzle. I felt a little bit like when I was a kid trying to impress my mother with my good table manners.

I was grateful for Pinkie Pie's presence. Her eating style was ... enthusiastic, let's just leave it at that. Despite having to dip my muzzle into my food, I still looked like the picture of elegance compared to her. Though I did find myself using a lot of napkins, especially anytime Rarity glanced at me.

I was startled by a rather loud crunch from across the table, and all I could do was stare. Spike had a plate of gemstones before him and he had just bitten into one. Seriously, he ate a gemstone like it was no harder than bread.

He noticed me looking at him and popped the rest of the gemstone into his mouth. "What?"

"Er, nothing, sorry," I said.

"No, wait, do I have something on me?" Spike brushed himself off with his claws. "I've been trying not to make a mess."

"Um, no, you're fine."

"Are you sure? Are my spines not straight?"

I gave him a wary look. Why was he so worried about this?

"Not to worry, my little Spikey-Wikey," Rarity said with a gentle smile. "You look absolutely fabulous this morning. A true gentledragon."

Did Rarity just call him by a pet name? And now Spike was blushing?

"I always try to look my best for you, Rarity," said Spike with a very overt look of puppy dog eyed affection.

O-kay, I had no idea whether to find that endearing or be totally creeped out by it.

The moment was spoiled when Spike's eyes widened, and his cheeks puffed out. He uttered a tremendous belch of green fire that made me flinch, and I nearly did a double-take when a scroll popped into existence from the flames and fell to the table.

Twilight levitated the scroll and unfolded it before her eyes. "This is from Princess Celestia. I had sent her a letter late last night before heading on to bed just to let her know what was going on."

"Anything you can share, Twilight?" Rarity asked.

"Just that she believes I'm handling things well concerning the summit and the pendant."

I heard a measure of relief in Twilight's voice. Perhaps this Princess Celestia was her superior? Or simply somepony she wanted to impress?

"She also states she and Princess Luna will be arriving at three this afternoon."

"What about Queen Chrysalis?" I asked.

"She'll arrive by nightfall."

"Well, I suppose she is technically royalty," said Rarity. "And thus entitled to be fashionably late."

Good. That way I could retire for the evening before she arrived and not risk running into her. At least from what I saw of the arrangements, she was going to be at the opposite end of the hallway from me.

"That will give me more time to come up with a banner for her," Rarity continued. "Not to mention it allows me to spend most of the morning with Candy."

I had to remind myself that was my name. It was another new anchor in this world. "Rachel" was slowly ceasing to exist. I supposed that was what I had thought I had wanted when I had agreed to this in the first place.

That might be another reason why I was reluctant to confess my origins. If I never had to do that, then I could just assume this new identity and leave the old one behind. The pendant was really the only thing holding me to the past. I know, I sounded like I was waffling, wanting one minute to preserve my old life and humanity, the next--

"Oh, I don't think there are any waffles this morning," Pinkie said. "Just pancakes."

"Wh-what?" I sputtered.

"So you'll just have to go pancaking instead. It's kinda like waffling, but more flat."

"But ... why did you even say that??"

"I dunno. Something I read, maybe?"

Twilight chuckled. "Don't worry, Candy, she's just being Pinkie Pie."

"I would also advise avoiding spending too much time trying to understand her," said Rarity with a smile. "It will only give you a headache."

I could have said that for a lot about this world.

Rarity dabbed a napkin against her muzzle -- not that it was needed considering how meticulous she had been through the whole meal -- and left her seat. "I need to freshen up a bit before we go. I will meet Candy and Pinkie by the main entrance."

Pinkie proceeded to finish off the rest of her breakfast in one massive bite. She looked like a pony-shaped chipmunk from the way her cheeks puffed out before she swallowed. "See ya in a bit, Candy!" she said as she slid off her seat and trotted away.

Twilight uttered a wistful sigh. "I wish I could go into town with the rest of you girls."

"It's okay, Twilight," I said. I managed a smile. "You've been really nice to me, letting me stay in your castle."

"It was my pleasure."

"I guess I shouldn't get too used to it, if I'm eventually going to move in with somepony else. Do you happen to know who I'll be fostered to?"

Spike smiled. "That would be none other than the beauti -- ow!"

Twilight had clopped her hoof against the back of his head. "Ah, actually, she wants that to be a surprise," said Twilight with a smile.

"You coulda told me that before," Spike grumbled.

"I did, but you apparently forgot in your enthusiasm," Twilight said out of the corner of her mouth.

Spike blushed. "Yeah, I did." He turned to me. "Forget I said anything!"

Uh-huh.

I supposed I should have been proud of myself that I had managed to put two and two together in that strange world and not come up with five, three, or fish. This would put everything I was going to experience that morning under a new light.

Chapter 8 - Morning In Ponyville

"Welcome to Ponyville!"

Pinkie Pie had jumped in front of us as we reached the end the road leading away from the castle, throwing her fore-hooves into the air as she gave her enthusiastic cry. She once more somehow conjured confetti out of thin air, which rained down upon myself, Rarity, and the two guards.

"Ah, darling?" Rarity said with a sigh as she brushed glittery bits out of her mane with her hoof. "She's been in Ponyville for three days now."

"Oh, but that was Sweet Apple Acres Ponyville, and then Hospital Ponyville, and then Castle Ponyville. She's never been to Ponyville Ponyville! And here it is!" Pinkie Pie stood to one side and gestured with a foreleg. "Ta-daaaah!"

I braced myself. I was expecting the town to spontaneously break out into song. When this did not appear forthcoming, I could be content that at least the insanity of this place did not go quite that far.

Though Pinkie did look eerily disappointed for a moment.

The town was indeed far more busy than it had been the evening before. If I still had any doubts that I had been transported to a colorful pony world, this would have shattered them. I actually felt a little more at ease; being among this technicolor population made my own lurid color scheme look perfectly ordinary. Hardly anypony gave me a second glance.

I noticed at once what was missing: children, or I supposed "foals" was the right term. I did see a few adult ponies carrying really small foals, likely no more than babies, but none older than that. It was a weekday, so I supposed they sent kids to school in this world just like they did on Earth. That suited me fine, to be honest. I was not that fond of little children, and I would just as soon not run into any if I could avoid it.

"We should first head over to the spa," said Rarity. "Pinkie, will you be--?"

I suddenly flinched so hard that I stumbled and bumped into Rarity when something roared overhead. I looked up, and for a moment I swore I was looking at a formation of fighter jets, colored bright blue and yellow. Only when I got a better look at their wings did I realize they were uniformed pegasi.

Impossibly fast pegasi. Good God.

"Are you all right, Candy?" Rarity asked.

My heart was still racing. "Yes, sorry, I wasn't expecting that."

"Yes, I know, I also wish the Wonderbolts would not fly quite so low. Rainbow Dash may be enamored of them, but I, for one, hope this summit is over soon so they can vacate our skies."

So the Wonderbolts were effectively the Blue Angels, but, well, ponies.

A voice from the other side of the street called out, "Heya, Pinkie!"

I turned my head and saw two ponies looking towards us, a beige earth pony and a mint-green unicorn. The former was waving a fore-hoof. I could not quite make out their cutie marks from that distance.

I was trying to pay more attention to those marks. They ran a rather wide gamut. Some were quite obvious in what talent they suggested, while others I felt were really open to interpretation. Like the stallion with the hourglass cutie mark I had spotted a moment ago. Did it mean he was good at time management? Making watches? Or something altogether different?

And I still had no idea what Rarity's cutie mark meant.

"Hi, Bon Bon, Lyra!" Pinkie called back. "Oo, Bon Bon! Perfect! Got a moment to talk?"

The unicorn looked a bit nervous, but the earth pony called back in an enthusiastic voice, "Sure thing!"

So there was a pony named Bon Bon. My name didn't seem as strange anymore.

Pinkie turned to Rarity and I. "I'm gonna go talk to Bon Bon and see if I can get her help with the dinner at the castle before heading over to Sugarcube Corner."

"Well, that answers the question I was trying to ask a moment ago," said Rarity. "I was going to extend the invitation for the spa treatment to you as well. My treat."

"Aww, thanks, but I gotta get started on dinner plans. Come see me later at Sugarcube Corner, okay? Have a good time, Candy! See ya!" She waved and bounced off towards the other two ponies.

I thought this rather fortuitous. If I was right about what Spike had almost revealed, I ought to get to know Rarity better. As friendly as Pinkie Pie was, she tended to be a bit of an overwhelming presence. I preferred her in smaller doses, similar to what I felt about Rainbow Dash but for different reasons.

"Come, dear, let's go," said Rarity.

The atmosphere of the town did not seem quite as lively as I had expected from a world of colorful ponies. That may have been due to the preponderance of the Royal Guard and uniformed deputies patrolling the streets. I assumed this was not normal for Ponyville. As much as the extra protection was likely warranted, it probably made the locals feel a bit nervous. I was glad not to be the only one worried about the summit.

Rarity, however, seemed above such worries, as if she had faced this sort of trouble before, and this was simply old hat. "I must admit, I am rather excited about the possibilities concerning your styling. Your hair is long enough that I would recommend braids. Perhaps for the mane a red braid on one side and an orange braid on the other. The contrast would frame your face beautifully."

I didn't think that the simple act of another taking an interest in my personal grooming could make me feel good, but it did just the same. Maybe because it felt almost normal. That was a word I had not had opportunity to use in a very long time. The last time I had used that term to describe myself was when I was twelve. It had not been long after that when my mother had begun her descent into drugs.

"Is something the matter, Candy?"

"Huh? Oh, um, nothing," I said. "Why do you ask?"

"You looked sad all of a sudden."

She had noticed that? Dammit. I had to go ruin a genuinely pleasant moment by wallowing in past regrets.

What could I tell her? The truth? It would sound like I was just trawling for pity, so I fell back on what I had been doing best: lying. "Oh, just hoping to get past the summit and my amnesia and all that."

Rarity gave me a gentle smile. Maybe that was still trawling, but the concerns I had expressed were nothing new. She appeared to accept it and moved on to talking about accessorizing. I simply listened and tried to enjoy the moment of relative calm.

I had not expected a simple trip to the pony equivalent of a beauty salon to challenge my notions of what these ponies could do, but it did just the same.

When the two earth ponies greeted us as we entered, I fully expected that they were simply the receptionists, that something as complex as grooming one adult pony and one almost adult pony required the intricacies of unicorn magic. So it was to my surprise to discover that Aloe and Lotus Blossom were the sole proprietors and attendants at this spa.

Of course, before I had a chance to experience their prowess, there was the matter of my pendant. The guards had taken up position just outside the establishment to give us privacy, so they were not available to keep an eye on it.

"We see that looks rather valuable," said Aloe. "We can secure it for you if you wish."

Aloe's compatriot Lotus Blossom -- or perhaps sister, as they looked like color-swapped versions of each other -- trotted over with the handle of a crystalline box in her mouth. She set it down near me and opened the lid with a nudge of her hoof. "Just place it in here, dear, and touch your horn to it. It will be locked to you and only you can open it."

Rarity rescued me from potential awkwardness. "Candy is having a little trouble with her magic. If she consents, I would be happy to lock it to myself instead."

"Yes, I'm fine with that," I said as I lifted my hooves to remove the pendant. It did not quite dawn on me right away, but that was the first time I had not hesitated before trusting another pony. I justified it with the thought that the pendant would just return to me anyway if somepony tried to make off with it.

I let Rarity pretty much direct the whole thing. Despite my upbringing, this was a bit of a new experience. My mother sometimes went for complex beauty regimes like this, but I had too much childlike restlessness to sit still for it. She had hinted at taking me to something like this for my sixteenth birthday.

I quickly divorced my mind of that thought. I was finally starting to relax, and I didn't want to spoil it.

Seriously, I was amazed at what these two ponies could do. The side effect was that the experience made me very keenly aware of how different my pony body was from my human body. That was not necessarily a bad thing. I had to learn how to deal with this body somehow. Certainly they knew just the right way to make muscles relax in places where I had only been vaguely aware I possessed such.

Maybe I was simply getting tired of rebelling against this transformation.

I managed to relax enough that I dozed a bit during our mutual silence imposed by the mud mask treatment. Aloe had to nudge me to full wakefulness before removing it.

"Sorry," I said sheepishly.

"No worry at all, dear," said Aloe with a smile. "I consider it a compliment."

"Did you sleep okay last night?" Rarity asked after Lotus Blossom removed her mud mask.

"Oh, um, mostly," I said. "I get a little restless sometimes when I sleep. Maybe just the stress of everything that happened lately."

"Having any bad dreams?"

"Sometimes. Nothing I can't handle, though."

Aloe stepped up to me. "We have some enchanted herbal essences which may help with sleep. Would you be interested in trying some?"

"We cannot guarantee you will not still have bad dreams," said Lotus Blossom. "Simply that it will help you get back to sleep more easily when you awaken during the night."

Aloe smiled. "Yes, the essences are good, but they are no substitute for Princess Luna when dealing with nightmares."

Wait, what??

"Are you okay, dear?" Rarity said. "You looked like you had a bit of a fright for a moment."

Both Aloe and Lotus Blossom were also looking at me with some concern.

I should have expected this. From what I had experienced the previous night at my window, it was clear that the recurring pony in my dreams was real. But Princess Luna? One of the two princesses who were coming to the castle for the summit? Would she instantly recognize me and know at once I was an alien?

No, I had to calm down. She had specifically said that she had no idea what kind of creature I was. I never appeared as a pony in my dreams. I was still safe. If I could just stop having these damn dreams, maybe she would go away.

"Um, I'm okay, sorry," I said. "So, these essences don't do anything to stop bad dreams?"

"It really depends on the cause of your dreams, dear," said Aloe.

"And we're not experts on that by any stretch of the imagination," said Lotus Blossom.

"But if they are simply the result of common anxieties, then, yes, the essences may help."

"And they are not terribly expensive."

Rarity smiled. "I would be happy to purchase some for you, Candy, if you wish to try them."

"Yes, please, thank you," I said. Certainly it was worth a shot. Anything to prevent my secret from getting out before I was ready.

If I were ever ready.

In the end, I had been fully bathed, massaged, pampered, exfoliated, groomed, and styled. I had no idea how much time had passed and really didn't care. All I could see was the end result.

They managed to make me not want to avert my gaze when looking at my pony body in the mirror. I might have consented that I actually looked pretty rather than just simply cutesy. Ultimately they had abandoned the idea of two braids for a single larger braid for my mane, my red and orange hairs twined into a near perfect spiral of alternating hues. My tail had been deemed too thick for braiding unless I was willing to have it severely trimmed. Instead, they enhanced its natural waviness and used hair clips to keep it in check. While pink hearts would not have been my first choice for the motif, they insisted it blended in with my natural colors more.

Hell, even my hooves looked good. The hooficure had left them with a smooth shine.

"You look absolutely wonderful, my dear," said Rarity. "I daresay it is perhaps a blessing that there will be no young colts for you to distract at this dinner, for you would surely turn their heads easily."

Dear God, that was not something I wanted to even think about, but I accepted the compliment at face value. "Thank you." I turned my head towards Aloe and Lotus Blossom. "And thank you as well. It really did turn out lovely."

"We are most happy you are pleased, Miss Swirl," said Aloe.

"Oh, do not forget your pendant!" said Lotus Blossom.

I had indeed managed to stop thinking about it for awhile, so that was an added bonus. I almost didn't want to take it back, yet I still felt a sense of relief when Lotus Blossom brought over the crystal chest.

Rarity dipped her head and touched her horn to the chest. It popped open at once, and she lifted the pendant to my neck with her magic, where I heard the faint click of the clasp engaging. "Let me pay for our treatments and your essences, and we can go."

"Okay," I said. "Oh, um, I don't really have a way to carry them."

"Not to worry, Miss Swirl," said Lotus Blossom. She and Aloe disappeared into the back and soon returned carrying what looked like two squarish canvas bags connected by thick straps. The outer parts were embroidered with the two ponies' cutie marks. I understood what they were when they were draped over my barrel, as I had recalled other ponies in town sporting something similar.

"All first-time customers receive a complimentary saddle-bag," said Aloe as her compatriot grabbed several small bottles and deposited them in one of the bags.

"Thank you," I said.

I got to see Equestrian money for the first time. Rarity had a small velvet bag tucked into her mane closed with a drawstring. Inside were bright gold coins of various sizes. From her conversation with Lotus and Aloe over the final pricing, I learned they were called "bits."

We bid our goodbyes and headed outside, the guards seamlessly falling into step with us as we left. "I thought we would detour by Fluttershy's cottage before heading over to Sugarcube Corner. You'll get to see more of the town that way."

"Are you still planning on heading over to your boutique later?" I asked.

"Of course. I am hoping to get there early enough to put in an hour or two of work before lunch, if you didn't mind waiting around."

I really was curious as to how she worked. My memories of watching my mother make dresses were really vague. By the time I was six, she had already moved on to being a manager and no longer made anything by hand. A few years later, her stores had become largely automated. Watching a bunch of machines was not very interesting.

"That's fine by me," I said.

From the height of the sun in the sky, it looked to be about mid-morning. I guessed the spa treatment had not lasted quite as long as I had thought. I was relaxed enough that the roar of the Wonderbolts flying overhead did not perturb me this time. As they streaked away, I noticed that one of the members of the squadron was leaving a rainbow-colored trail.

I squinted into the bright sky. "Is that Rainbow Dash up there?"

"Yes, she's in the Wonderbolt reserves," said Rarity. "They must have called her up for duty. Either that, or she begged for the opportunity to fly with them. I would not have put that past her."

I had pegged Rainbow to be a bit egotistical, but I supposed some of it was justified if she could fly that fast. Certainly I was grateful for her recognizing the changeling back at the hospital and protecting me until Twilight had arrived.

As much as I was enjoying my morning with Rarity and looked forward to seeing Fluttershy again, I still wondered what drove them both to be so attentive to me. I tried not to think on it too hard. I wanted to hold on to these nice feelings and not worry about anything anymore. I wanted to trust Twilight and the other princesses to keep whatever forces wanted my pendant at bay and get on with life.

"Rarity, can I ask you something?" I said.

"Of course, anything."

"What if I never get my memory back?"

Rarity smiled gently. "Now, Candy, it helps to have a more positive outlook."

"I know, but, please, humor me. What happens if it doesn't come back?"

"I guess I am not sure what you mean. In what context?"

I was not sure how to put it without, again, seeming like I was looking for somepony to take pity on me, or without revealing that I was pretty sure Rarity was intending to foster me. "How would ... how would the other ponies feel about that? How would you feel about that?"

Rarity paused. Whether because she had been surprised by the question or was trying to find a nice way to let me down, I had no idea. When she finally did speak, it was in soft, measured tones. "We all would like to know who you really are, Candy. However, I doubt your past would ever change how we feel about you. We all have things in our pasts we are not proud of, if that is what you fear will be revealed. That doesn't change who we are now. Does that make sense?"

It did, but I was not sure how relevant it was. I was not even sure who I was anymore. Was I still a human wrapped in a pony body? Was I a pony who simply used to be a human? Or was my human heritage even important anymore? The fact that I continued to dream of myself as human made the question even harder to answer.

"Is there something you need to tell me, Candy?" Rarity asked.

"No, not really," I said quickly. I was still taking the coward's way out. Fine, so be it. I had something good going, at least relative to what I had just a few days ago, and I didn't want to spoil it. "I'm probably worried over nothing. It just feels strange to be here. Um, in this situation, I mean."

Rarity smiled faintly. "You feel suddenly thrust into the spotlight, as it were."

"Yeah, I guess you could say that."

"I know how that feels, despite the fact that my additional fame was occasional and fleeting."

O-kay, I was not expecting that. Rarity was famous for something other than being a fashion designer? Did that have something to do with whatever council she was on involving Twilight? Should I show my ignorance and have her explain it, or just go along with it like I knew what she was talking about?

Maybe whatever she was famous for was something relatively minor. Certainly she never claimed to have any further title like Twilight had. Even Aloe and Lotus Blossom referred to her as no more than "Miss Rarity."

I had to know. "I'm sorry, Rarity, I don't recall what else you're famous for."

"Quite all right. I tend not to be a braggart about it. I am an Element-bearer."

I had no clue what that meant, and yet I felt like it was incredibly important. "Wow, really?" I said, hoping that was an appropriate response.

"Yes, well, it's not something that comes up in casual conversation. To be perfectly honest, I would much rather be known for my beautiful designs, dressmaking skills, and excellent fashion sense. And I am more accurately a former Element-bearer, since we had to give them up."

She had already implied there were more than one of these Element-bearers. I had a feeling I had hit a brick wall as to how far I could claim ignorance. This sounded like something most ponies would know.

"I do hope you don't treat me any differently," said Rarity. "Really, it confers no other status or title upon me, nor does it change who I am."

Well, that made it easier to hide my ignorance. "I understand, and I won't."

A soft fondness came over her face. "But I do admit, I did look absolutely fabulous while wearing it. If there is one thing I miss, it's that."

"Do the right thing, but make sure you look good doing it."

The words had spilled from my mouth before I realized I had said them. I tried not to panic when Rarity looked at me, her eyes widening slightly. "Why, that's a rather good way to put it, Candy. Wherever did you hear that?"

I had no time to come up with a suitable lie. "Oh, um, just something my mother said once," I mumbled.

"Well, I would say she was a very wise mare, then."

I forced a smile and just nodded.

Rarity must have sensed an undertone of sadness from me, as she dutifully changed the topic. "I believe we should head over to Fluttershy's cottage. Hopefully her, ah, tea partner has left by now."

"Tea partner?" I asked. I had only been half-listening to their conversation about it earlier.

"Fluttershy sits down to tea every Tuesday morning with Discord. As much as Fluttershy trusts him, he is not one I would recommend you meet anytime soon. He is still quite the ruffian, if you ask me." Rarity shivered slightly. "And he has no fashion sense!"

So this Discord was some sort of known miscreant? It was the first time I was hearing the name, but apparently it must be widely known since Rarity chose not to explain further.

Having tea with some sort of criminal? That sounded rather out of character for Fluttershy, but then again, Michelle often tried to make friends with the worst of the drug addicts to get them to clean themselves up. It was frightening how many times she had succeeded. Maybe Fluttershy was trying to reform this pony.

I wished Rarity would just come out and tell me she was thinking of fostering me. I supposed it was possible I had made the wrong assumption. She had never mentioned having either a husband or foals of her own. As nice as she seemed, she didn't strike me as a motherly type. However, many people had made that assumption about my mother as well and were often surprised when I showed up and said I was her daughter.

I had my doubts anyone, human or pony, could take my mother's place. Rarity would be more like the big sister I never had. It would certainly make living as a pony for the rest of my life a lot more palatable.

Chapter 9 - Memories

A large tree rose at the end of a secluded path, still thriving despite having been hollowed out to create Fluttershy's cottage. Her tea partner had indeed departed. Animals frolicked about, both outside the cottage and inside, scampering so close to my hooves that I worried I might step on one of the critters by accident. Rarity's praise of Fluttershy's abilities had not been exaggerated; I doubt I ever saw more content creatures in my life.

Well, save for the one little white bunny who seemed to have a frown permanently etched into his fuzzy face.

"Would you like to stay for some tea?" Fluttershy asked.

"We'll have to pass this time, Fluttershy, but thank you," said Rarity. "Pinkie wanted us to stop off at Sugarcube Corner before we head over to the boutique. Oh, and that reminds me, our dear filly here has a name."

"Oh? What is it?"

"It's, um, Candy Swirl," I said.

Fluttershy smiled. "That's a perfectly lovely name."

"Pinkie deserves the credit, she helped me come up with it."

"I'm glad she was able to help. And you look wonderful, Candy."

So Fluttershy had not first assumed it was a name I had remembered? Was she just being kind, or did she have some sort of insight into me of which I was unaware?

"I am actually rather happy we went with the single braid instead of two," said Rarity. "It is already giving me ideas for the perfect dress for her."

"I'm sure whatever you come up with will be lovely," said Fluttershy.

"Let's just hope I can do even half as good a job coming up with a banner to adorn Queen Chrysalis' room."

Fluttershy shivered slightly, her smile faltering.

"Which reminds me, there will be a formal dinner this evening at the castle. Will you be joining us?"

Fluttershy's gaze slid to the side. "Um ... I-I don't know if I should."

"Oh, but I am sure the princesses will be interested to hear how you have been doing."

Fluttershy swallowed. "It's n-not them I'm worried about," she said in a barely audible voice.

Rarity smiled and stepped up to her friend. "Queen Chrysalis is not due to arrive until late. I am sure you can leave before she arrives."

"I'm planning on returning to my room before she shows up," I said. After a short pause, I added, "I would be happy to see you there, Fluttershy."

Fluttershy turned her gaze towards me, a small smile returning to her muzzle. "All right."

Like with my words to Rarity earlier, my internal censor had refused to cooperate. A reflex action, perhaps. I often had to coax Michelle to come out of her apartment now and then and be a little social. Had my mother lived, I would have likely invited Michelle to one of my mother's formal affairs.

Maybe that had been a little selfish of me to put Fluttershy on the spot, but I could not deny her presence helped calm me.

I only glanced at the sights on the rest of this impromptu tour of Ponyville, my interest captivated more by the company than the scenery as we headed towards Sugarcube Corner. Pinkie Pie likely would have pouted at my apparent disinterest. Or worse, her hair would deflate.

I was not at all surprised to see her on the employee side of the counter. Before I could say a word, she gasped as she beheld me. "Oo, you look so nice, Candy!" She giggled. "You really do look like those little candy treats now!"

"Thank you," I said. Favorable comparisons to desserts and treats apparently served as standard compliments coming from her. "Is this your store?"

"Oh, no, I just work here sometimes and foalsit occasionally."

Pinkie Pie as a babysitter. That ... conjured up some interesting imagery.

"Right now I'm just watching the store and the twins until Mr. and Mrs. Cake are back. They went to the castle to help prepare for the dinner tonight."

My stomach fluttered a bit. How were ponies expected to conduct themselves in more formal circumstances? I resolved to stick close to Rarity and emulate her. She had made it clear she could handle herself in such a formal situation with ease.

I remembered my first formal affair I attended with my mother. I parroted her almost exactly. I probably looked rather silly, but everyone had found it endearing.

"Oo, that reminds me!" Pinkie said. She reached under the counter and pulled out a tray covered in cupcakes. "How do these look?"

Four kinds of cupcakes adorned the tray. First were spongy white cupcakes I identified immediately as angel food by just the smell alone, covered in yellow and blue frosting forming stylized suns against a clear sky. The next set were chocolate cupcakes covered in dark blue and white frosting forming crescent moons. The third were blueberry cupcakes adorned with pink candy stars surrounded by smaller white stars against purple frosting. The last were caramel fudge with black and green icing shaped like pairs of insect-like eyes. Strangely, that last set had holes carved out of each cupcake in random locations.

"Why, that is perfectly wonderful, Pinkie," said Rarity. "And it gives me an idea for the design of the banner for Queen Chrysalis' room."

Fluttershy swallowed when she glanced at the last set of cupcakes. "M-maybe make the eyes a little less scary on the banner," she murmured.

At Fluttershy's words, a cupcake from the fourth batch pulled in my gaze, its green frosting eyes staring back at me. I shivered, and my heart suddenly skipped a beat.

"You find them a little scary, too?"

I blinked and tore my gaze from the cupcake, my heart racing. "A little, I guess."

I had no idea why. Did the design of the cupcakes have to do with what changelings really looked like? The idea of giant insect creatures creeped me out, but not enough to make me quake from just a silly stylistic representation on a confection.

"Hmm," Pinkie said, looking thoughtful. "I was gonna have them enchanted so they sprouted little changeling wings and buzzed about the room, but maybe I shouldn't do that, huh?"

"Please don't," said Fluttershy.

"As lovely as they are, darling, I agree that would be overkill," Rarity said gently.

The bell above the door tinkled as one of my guards stepped inside. He trotted up to us, his eyes set hard. "Excuse me, but I have just been informed that a changeling attempted to breach the Castle of Friendship."

My heart fell into my stomach.

"Oh, no!" Fluttershy cried.

"Is everypony all right?" Rarity asked.

"The attempt was thwarted thanks to Princess Twilight's detection spell," said the pegasus. "The changeling had adopted the form of Bon Bon."

Pinkie Pie gasped. "Bon Bon was a changeling all this time?!"

Good God. I had looked straight at her earlier. We all had.

"Oh, surely that is not the case!" Rarity said. "Er ... is it?"

"Deputies found the real Bon Bon and Lyra Heartstrings in their home in a magically-induced sleep," said the guard. "So it is likely the changeling adopted her form only this morning."

"Well, that is a relief, certainly," said Rarity.

"Did they catch the changeling this time?" I asked.

"Unfortunately, no," said the guard. "But a patrol was sent to look for it. Miss Swirl, if you would prefer to return to the castle for your protection, we're willing to take you back there now. I was told to leave the decision in your hooves."

I did not want to make that kind of decision! The coward in me wanted to gallop back to the castle as fast as my hooves could take me.

"How did the changeling even get into town?" Fluttershy asked.

"Likely it was already in town before the additional security arrived," said the guard.

"Does Twilight believe there is an immediate threat to Candy?" said Rarity. "Or at least any more than there already was?"

"The Princess does not believe so. The changeling headed away from town when it escaped. If it tried to infiltrate the town again, it would likely be spotted by the Wonderbolts or stopped at a checkpoint."

"What of Lyra? She was with Bon Bon -- that is, the changeling -- when we saw her. Does that mean there is a second changeling about?"

"We don't know yet. The hospital reported that it will be several more hours before either Bon Bon or Lyra awaken and can be questioned."

Rarity turned to me. "It's ultimately up to you, but I do still wish for you to see the boutique."

"Can I come along?" Fluttershy asked. "I kind of don't want to be alone right now."

"Of course, you know you are always welcome."

I was tired of being scared, and if somepony as timid as Fluttershy could do it, so could I. "I would really like to see it, too. I'll be okay."

"Then we'll head over there without further delay," said Rarity. She turned to Pinkie. "I had hoped we could stay for a bit, but we ought to get going so we can get back to the castle before lunch."

"Okey-dokey!" Pinkie called out. "See ya at dinner!"

Rarity threw open the door and swept a foreleg before her, a wide smile on her face. "Welcome to the Carousel Boutique!"

Trotting inside behind Rarity felt like another step into the past. Even after she had made it big, my mother sometimes spoke fondly of her first store, which she even visited on occasion. By the time I had seen it, it had already been converted to full automation. I never really got to see it when everything was still made by hand.

Rarity's horn glowed as the sign in the window flipped from "CLOSED" to "OPEN." "Fluttershy, be a dear, please, and remain here in case any customers arrive. I wish to give Candy a little tour and perhaps catch up on some orders."

"Of course," Fluttershy said with a smile.

"For once, I am actually hoping not to get too many customers today," said Rarity as she led me further into the boutique. "Perhaps those two hulking armored pegasi outside will keep ponies at bay."

The smell tickled my equine senses at once. Even in the automated stores back home, new fabric had a distinctive odor. The quick and repetitive movements of the automated looms tortured the fabric enough to loosen tiny threads which floated in the air and littered the floor. Here I could smell the fabrics while they remained peacefully on the bolts sitting upon the shelves against the back wall.

It really did look like any dressmaker's shop back on earth. Below the fabric bolts, several shelves contained countless spools of thread, needles, measuring tape, sewing gauges, and a myriad of other supplies. A sewing machine sat upon a table among bits of cut fabric, ribbons, and runs of thread. All that differed from a dressmaker's shop on Earth was that the mannequins were pony-shaped. Ponnequins, I supposed.

I glanced at several large chests which lay against one wall. They appeared strong and bulky enough to be intended to protect something valuable. Rare fabrics, perhaps?

"You've been holding out on me, darling."

I whipped my gaze towards Rarity to find her smiling knowingly at me. "I'm sorry?"

"I know the look of a pony who has seen this before."

Was I that easy to read as a pony? People never could read me that well as a human. "Oh, um, well ... I guess maybe I forgot to mention that my mother was, um, in the fashion business."

Rarity's eyes positively lit up. "My stars, really? And in Manehattan?"

"I was rather young," I said quickly. "So I don't remember too many details about it."

"While that is too bad, I am rather pleased I can offer you something familiar."

I decided not to tell her about how my mother's shops were largely automated, as I still did not have a handle on the tech level of this world. I smiled. "Yes, it does look familiar, and it ... brings back some memories."

"Twilight told Fluttershy and I that your mother is no longer with us," Rarity said. "I am terribly sorry about that."

My throat became tight. "Rarity, if you don't mind me asking, have you ever had any, um, foals?"

"No, dear, I have yet to be fortunate enough to find a special somepony I could share my life with in that way. I do have a younger sister, though, with whom I am very close."

In a way, that made me feel better. If she was going to foster me, I would rather not worry that her biological children would feel I had usurped attention from their mother.

Rarity smiled. "Of course, there is a downside to you being familiar with all this. You're likely to get dreadfully bored while I work."

"Oh, no, not at all," I said in all sincerity. "After all the excitement, I could do with something more mundane."

Rarity's horn glowed, and a pair of spectacles alighted onto her muzzle. "In that case," she said as a dress sitting on one of the ponnequins floated over to her workbench. "Please have a seat while I put the finishing touches on this dress."

The first time Rarity levitated a bolt of fabric off the shelf behind me, it gave me a bit of a start, as she had not even so much as looked up from her work. My eyes soon widened as half a dozen objects routinely floated about her at any one time. A smile stretched across my muzzle as her magic did everything from cutting fabric to threading a needle. Only after staring at this spectacle for some time did I finally notice her hooves feeding fabric through the sewing machine. I had heard it running for much of that time; had she been doing that all along while simultaneously conducting this magical symphony? Good God.

My mother had told me about how she had worked her fingers to the bone in that very first shop she opened; she would have killed to have this ability.

And I could do little more than throw a few sparks from my own horn or chuck things in random directions like a baby's first attempts with blocks. I wanted to change that. Maybe I'd never reach Rarity's level of sophistication or anywhere near Twilight's power, but surely I could do something useful.

Fluttershy interrupted Rarity a few times when customers arrived despite the intimidating presence of the guards outside. One would always accompany the customer into the store and linger until they left. Two ponies had wanted simple alterations, which Rarity did right there at the counter and did not even charge them for it. The third wanted a completely new design, which left me alone with Fluttershy for a bit.

"Are you getting along well with Rarity?" Fluttershy asked in a hopeful voice.

"I am, actually," I said.

"Oh, good! She'll be very glad to hear that."

"I think she already knows."

"That's even better." Fluttershy paused. "She really does want to get to know you better."

"It's really that important to her?"

"Yes, very much. Um, that is, she just wants to be your friend. N-nothing more than that."

Oh, Fluttershy, you're not only as sweet as Michelle was, you're as much of a terrible liar. I was very tempted to tell her that I already knew Rarity wanted to foster me, but I decided against it. I didn't want to embarrass her.

"By the way, I'm sorry if I put you on the spot earlier," I said.

"What do you mean?"

"When you were trying to decide whether to go to the dinner tonight. You really don't have to go if you don't want to."

"No, that's okay," Fluttershy said. "I mean ... it would let me get to know you better, too."

I understood the feeling of operating outside of one's comfort zone, as it had defined my first day in this strange world, and I sensed the same from her. So Fluttershy was not simply a duplicate of Michelle after all; Michelle was no social butterfly by any means, but she interacted with people far more than Fluttershy ever did.

Not long after, the earth pony customer trotted out the back. Rarity followed, a tape measure draped across her barrel, a piece of tailor's chalk tucked behind one ear. "I should have it ready for you by Thursday. Sorry it cannot be sooner, but I have a bit of a backlog."

"No worries, Rarity, thanks!" said the earth pony before the guard escorted her out.

Rarity turned to me and smiled. "Your turn, Candy."

"Er, my what?" I said.

"A dress for this evening, of course."

"Oh, but, you said you had a backlog ..."

"But I am simply bursting with ideas, and I need to act on it. Now, please, come back with me."

"It's okay," Fluttershy said. "You go along with Rarity. I'll just keep minding the store out here."

"All right," I said, trotting after Rarity.

Rarity used the tape measure on me first, jotting down figures with a quill and pad, everything held purely by unicorn magic.

"Your tail is thick enough that I believe we will not go with a complete cover, it will make the dress too billowy," said Rarity as she slowly stepped around me. "But we'll need to bring it together under the tail and spread out in a 'vee' shape to keep freedom of movement in your hind legs."

I resisted the urge to draw my tail in to better hide my girly bits. I know I had been naked all this time, but I never had another pony looking quite that closely at my hindquarters before.

"Oh, but we simply must accessorize the tail in that case," Rarity continued. "Nothing ostentatious. Just a simple line of gems woven down the center. As for the front, we'll go with something a bit modest considering your age."

Modest? It wasn't like I had anything there worth covering.

"A rounded hemline under the neck. Hmm, that means the pendant will overlay the dress. I'll need to adjust the color balance appropriately. Perhaps a paneled dress, one base color for the front and one for the barrel and rear. Yes, yes, I think I have it. Let's try to put this together, shall we?"

"You mean right now?" I asked.

"Of course," Rarity said with a smile. "No time like the present."

As she turned away, I noticed a roughed-in dress gracing one of the ponnequins where none had been earlier. Was that the prototype of the dress she had crafted for the earth pony? How did she do it that fast?

I flinched a bit when the bolts of fabric suddenly flew through the air at me, eliciting a brief, gentle admonishment. "Please stand still, Candy, if you would."

She wrapped several colors of fabric loosely around me, looking thoughtful as her eyes flicked over me. A minute later, all but two of the colors shot back to their shelves, the remainder dropping to her work table. One was a deep wine red, almost purple in shade, the other a lighter softer red.

"Red is usually too bold of a color for a young filly," said Rarity as she cut swathes of the two colors from the bolts. "But it is the best hue to use with such hair color without it contrasting too sharply." The bolts shot back to their shelves as she picked up the swathes she had cut.

While her prowess still awed me, it had not silenced me. Instead, a memory I wanted to ignore had quelled my enthusiasm. Had I spoken, my voice would crack, and Rarity might interpret it wrong.

Rarity fit the lighter shade to my front and the other to the rest. She carefully shaped the pieces with the scissors, her magic doing the work of several pairs of hands. I tensed for a moment when multiple pins flew through the air, but I felt not a single pin-prick as they fastened the pieces together.

"Lift your tail for a moment, if you would, please."

I did as she asked, and she shaped and fit the cloth as she had suggested earlier.

"Yes, this is working out quite well!" Rarity said in a bright voice. "Lift your left fore-leg, hold it for a few seconds, then do the same with the other."

I complied. The cloth suddenly felt tight around the shoulders as I lifted one leg, but a few magical tugs later, and it lay more comfortably. The other leg encountered much less difficulty, but she made a few more adjustments anyway. More pins flew.

"Now for the trim," she said as she let go of the pendant. Ribbons darted towards me. "Hmm, too bright ... no, too shiny ... ugh, not shiny enough! ... Ah, here we go!"

She finally settled on one that was a sort of silvery blue that gleamed slightly. Rarity stepped back to examine it for a moment before nodding once, more pins arriving.

"Hmm, I cannot quite decide on the gems to use for your tail, but we can take care of that later," said Rarity. "But I do know exactly what I want to do for the front!"

Her horn glowed, and one of the chests behind her suddenly flipped open. Sapphires glittered in dark blue splendor, enough to be worth a fortune back on Earth if they indeed filled the entire chest. Yet I gave them a cursory look at best as the past struggled with the present.

She levitated about a dozen of the gems from the chest and fit them along the collar of the dress. Rarity stepped to one side, letting the light hit them fully. They sparkled beautifully.

My heart lurched.

"Wonderful!" Rarity said. "They bring out your eyes perfectly, and the spot of bright gold from the pendant accents the darker colors so nicely. Now, it does look a bit plain right now, but I will be adding additional patterns and accessories. Yet I believe the colors and basic design really speak to me." She stepped aside, her horn glowing. A full-length mirror slid across the floor and stopped before me. "Tell me what you think."

I stared ... struggled ... and the past won.

~~~

I stood in front of the mirror, staring with wide eyes. My trembling hand reached up to the collar of the dress, where the rhinestones glittered. The dress fit snugly but comfortably, balancing just the right amount of accentuation that my burgeoning femininity desired with the modesty my twelve year old body demanded.

"What do you think?"

I smiled. "It's beautiful, Mom. It's beautiful!"

"Do you really like it?"

"Oh, God, yes! Is this from your new line?"

"No, dear. This is yours."

I blinked. I turned and looked up. "Wh-what?"

My mother smiled. "I made this for you, and just for you." She squeezed my shoulder. "Happy birthday, Rachel."

I lifted my arms. She reached down and hugged me. "Thank you, Mom. You're the best."

~~~

"Ah ... Candy?"

I trembled. My eyes misted.

"Are you all right?" Rarity asked. "If ... if there's something wrong with the dress, I can--"

"No, it's b-beautiful," I croaked.

"Are you quite sure?"

I swallowed hard. "R-Rarity ... could you give me a moment alone?" Something trickled down my cheek and around the side of my muzzle. "P-please?"

"Yes, of course, dear," said Rarity quickly as she turned away. "I'll, um, keep Fluttershy company for a bit."

She had barely fled the room when my eyes blurred with tears.

Goddammit. Three years. Three fucking years since I had ever shed a tear over my mother. Why the hell now? Why in a stupid pony body in a stupid pony world when it didn't even matter anymore?!

I sniffled, wiping my eyes with my foreleg. I took a deep breath to compose myself. I had no right to go into total breakdown. That memory belonged to someone who no longer existed. Rachel Darrow was no more. I was Candy Swirl, a pony whose past was irrelevant. All that mattered was the present.

When I had managed to halt the silly waterworks, I called out to Rarity. Both her and Fluttershy stepped into the room. "Are you all right, Candy?" Rarity asked in a soft voice.

"Is there something we can do?" Fluttershy asked.

I looked at Fluttershy. I had to stop with this nonsense that she reminded me of Michelle. She was just a pony concerned for my welfare. I managed a small smile. "Thank you, both, but I'm all right now." I looked at Rarity. "The dress is beau ... g-gorgeous. I'm sure it will look spectacular once you have it done."

Rarity slowly smiled. "So long as you are truly pleased with it, dear."

"I am. I'm sorry for before. I just ... um ... the stress of everything just kind of got to me for a moment. This is the first day since I was found on the farm where I've actually had some fun."

Rarity's smile widened. She magicked the entire dress from my body and placed it gently on one of the ponnequins. "I am very pleased to hear you say that, and I will be sure to make this dress live up to your expectations."

"It does look very lovely," Fluttershy said. "Um, Candy? Are you sure there isn't anything else you need to talk about?"

My heart lurched again, but I ignored it. No more emotionalism, I had had enough of it. "I'm fine, Fluttershy, but thank you for asking."

She smiled faintly at me, and I tried to ignore the bit of doubt I saw in her gaze.

Chapter 10 - On Edge

"I'll accompany you to the castle, Candy," Rarity said as we stepped out of her boutique. "I wish to consult briefly with Twilight about my proposed design for Queen Chrysalis' banner, then I will head right back here to work on it and the dress."

"Will you be able to get it all done in time?" Fluttershy asked, echoing the question in my own mind.

Rarity smiled. "This is nothing compared to other deadlines I've been under. I'll have to check with Pinkie, but I doubt dinner will be served before four considering the princesses arrive at three. I will have plenty of time. Oh, Candy, if you could stop by my boutique around two, I can do a final fitting."

"So long as somepony can escort me," I said. "I don't quite know my way around Ponyville yet."

"I'd be happy to," said Fluttershy.

I swept my gaze about the town on the return to the castle in an attempt to better acquaint myself with its layout, but the streets sometimes ran in directions counter to easy recall. Ponyville appeared to have grown organically, streets running hither and yon, only occasionally settling into patterns more closely resembling the more familiar grid layout of the cities of home.

The pegasus guards at the entrance of the castle had been exchanged for unicorns, though no less armored nor any less intimidating. The reason became clear when one cast Twilight's detection spell on each of us in turn before allowing us entry.

"Finally," Rarity said. "Twilight is learning the art of delegation. Why she does not have a large staff at this castle I will never understand."

"She doesn't want to put on airs," said Fluttershy.

"Yes, well, there's image, and then there's convenience. She needs to learn to balance the two." She turned to one of the guards. "Speaking of whom, where might I find Twilight?"

"Princess Twilight is in the library, ma'am, last I saw," said the guard. "Though I am not sure she wants to be disturbed."

"She will certainly make an exception for me. I need to speak with her for only a moment, and then I will leave her to her fretting over the summit. Come along, all."

"When we're done, I'll want to head to my room," I said as we trotted down the corridor.

"Of course, dear, not a problem."

"I can take you there now if you ..." Fluttershy trailed off as voices drifted down the corridor towards us from ahead.

"--have no direct proof that he was the cause of her appearance!" came Twilight's voice.

"Goodness," Fluttershy murmured. "She sounds upset."

Then a male voice I had never heard before countered, "Just the same, Twiley, do you really think you should have her inside your own castle?!"

Rarity's eyes widened. "Is that--?"

"What are you talking about?" said Twilight.

"And all this time I was worried that she was a planted spy for the changelings!" said the male voice, my stomach twisting.

"What?!"

"And now I learn she could be just another setup for betrayal -- again! -- by Discord!"

Fluttershy gasped.

"--Shining Armor??" Rarity said, her eyes wide.

"What in the name of Equestria are you talking about?!" Twilight bellowed.

"Um, maybe we should--" Fluttershy began.

My hooves carried me forward as if of their own accord.

"Candy, wait!" Rarity hissed.

I didn't listen. Rationality had fought against my emotional turmoil and lost.

"Oh, come on, Twiley!" cried the male voice. "Do you really believe he's sorry for how he betrayed all of us to Tirek?"

"That's not the point!" cried Twilight. "She's just a filly!"

"So she claims."

I skidded to a stop before the open doors of the library and stared.

Twilight stood in an almost combative stance, her eyes narrowed. She glared at a large white unicorn stallion with a three-tone blue mane and tail. His cutie mark was a blue shield with a six-pointed star that, curiously, shared almost the same shade of pinkish-red as Twilight's mark.

Twilight stomped her hoof. "I do not have to listen to this! Princess Celestia has stated specifically that she trusts me implicitly in this matter! I do not need you stomping in here making these ridiculous claims about somepony who is not even an adult and try to claim--!"

"Ahem."

The noise from Rarity startled myself as much as it did both verbal combatants in the library. She and Fluttershy had caught up with me and stood on either side.

Twilight's eyes widened slightly as she turned her head towards us. "I'm sorry," she said in a lower voice. "I didn't know you had returned."

"Apparently," said Rarity in an icy voice.

The unicorn stallion narrowed his gaze at me. My ears drew back as I met his eyes, and I tried not to lower my head. One of my rear hooves twitched.

Twilight took a deep breath. "Candy, you look very nice. Your morning with Rarity apparently went rather well. This is my brother, Shining Armor. Shining, this is Candy Swirl."

"Candy," Shining Armor said in a cool voice, nodding his head once, his hard eyes never leaving me.

Rarity trotted forward, mercifully interrupting his gaze. "Fluttershy, would you be so kind as to take Candy to her room?" she said in a voice of deadly calm.

Fluttershy gulped. "Er, um, y-yes, of course." She gestured to me urgently with her hoof.

I wanted to stay. I wanted to know if this was indeed about me, and what new suspicions were being heaped upon me. Yet it finally clicked in my head what was going on with Rarity.

Rarity was pissed.

I followed Fluttershy, glancing behind me in time to see the doors to the library glow with Rarity's magic and swiftly close. My heart thumped. I wanted to think that I deserved the defense I assumed Rarity was about to mount on my behalf, but I didn't want anypony to get into trouble because of me. "I sometimes still feel like a bit of a burden."

I knew Fluttershy would react the way she did, and yet I had said it anyway; she stopped and gave me a hug, even taking care not to muss my coiffed mane. I had plied her for sympathy, or perhaps manipulated was the better word.

"You're not a burden, Candy," Fluttershy said. "Please, don't think that. Things are just ... confused right now. This summit is making everypony a little crazy, I think."

"I just hope Rarity and Twilight can set Shining Armor straight about me."

Fluttershy smiled as we continued on. "Shining Armor is a wonderful pony, Candy. He's Twilight's BBBFF for a reason."

"Huh?"

"Big Brother Best Friends Forever. I think he's just concerned for Twilight and wants to help. After all, she's helped him on several -- oh!"

Fluttershy had spotted them the same time I had. Two armored earth ponies patrolled the hallway ahead, yet they looked like none I had ever seen. They appeared wrapped in shiny glass instead of fur. Sparkles flitted about their coats as they trotted past, as if they were indeed living crystal. Even the reflections of light in their eyes were faceted.

"He must have brought some guards with him from the Crystal Empire," said Fluttershy.

So this was yet another form of pony? Earth, unicorn, pegasus, alicorn ... crystal?

"Though I don't think Shining Armor brought Princess Cadance with him," said Fluttershy. "That's too bad, I would like to see her again. I think you would like her."

So there was a fourth princess. Which made Shining Armor a Prince. Prince Shining Armor. That was not quite the same as the Earth phrase "a knight in shining armor," but, seriously, do pony parents somehow look into the future when naming their foals?

At least this distraction helped calm me down enough that I could process more of what I had overheard. "Fluttershy? Shining Armor had mentioned the name Discord."

Fluttershy averted her eyes. "Um, what about it?"

"Is that the same Discord that you have tea with every Tuesday?"

"Oh, um, yes, he is, but, please, he really is trying to do better. He assured me he had nothing to do with your memory loss."

That ... was unexpected. Why would they think somepony here had anything to do with that? I hoped they weren't blaming that miscreant pony for things he never did, let alone for something I had completely invented. "If it helps any, I don't think I've ever met him."

Fluttershy smiled. "Oh, that's good to know! Would you mind if I told the others?"

"If it means they'll stop worrying about somepony who's likely innocent of doing anything wrong to me, then, sure, go ahead."

"Thank you. This will put a lot of ponies' minds at ease."

Perhaps I had managed to set one thing right. Shining Armor had spoken of this Discord as if he had done something truly terrible. Likely this pony had enough things to answer for without being falsely accused of wronging me.

Life at the castle seemed to become both more hectic and more regimented at the same time. Apparently Shining Armor had been put in charge of the guards. The only real effect this had on me was replacing one of my pegasus guards with a unicorn guard. Many guard contingents were similarly rearranged. It made a certain amount of sense to me, balancing strength with magic.

I had hoped to stay in my room until I needed to head over to the Carousel Boutique. As a human, I had become accustomed to skipping lunch. Equine biology apparently said otherwise, and I wandered over to the kitchen around one in the afternoon, my complement of guards in tow. As I arrived, Spike emerged holding a tray with a sandwich atop it. "Oh, hey, Candy," he called out. "Here for some lunch?"

"That would be nice," I said.

"Sure thing! Let me take this to Twilight, and I'll be right back to fix you something."

"Oh, you don't have to trouble yourself, I--"

"Nah, no trouble at all! Just sit yourself in the dining hall."

While I awaited Spike's return, I mulled over my earlier conversation with Rarity. My mind returned to the same term: Element-bearer. She had implied she had worn it, perhaps like jewelry. Was it magical, or just representative of some honor or title?

If I could have some time alone, I could visit the library and finally look up some of this stuff. Having a better handle on this world would obviate the need to reveal my origins. I could claim my memory never came back and settle into a new life. Hadn't a new life been the original goal?

Spike put together a veggie-platter, mostly similar to what I had seen in the hospital, but with one addition: flowers. Had I not spotted the white petal sticking out of the sandwich Spike had delivered to Twilight, I would have assumed them to be garnish.

"Here you go!" Spike said as he slid the tray in front of me.

"Thank you," I said.

He hopped into a seat opposite me. "Mind if I keep you company? I already ate, but I could use a break. I swear, Twilight's running me almost as ragged as she's running herself!"

"Are you really Twilight's sole staff?"

Spike smiled. "Yep, I pretty much do it all."

"Including the food preparation, apparently."

He glanced off to the side and leaned across the table, lowering his voice. "Trust me, you don't want to taste Twilight's cooking."

I smiled. I needed some humor. He also didn't bat an eye at my table manners. "Have you been with Twilight for long?" I knew I was risking treading on information that might be common knowledge, but Spike seemed friendly enough.

His smile widened. "All my life, in fact."

"Really?"

"She hatched me when she was a filly."

So I had been right; Spike was more or less a child. But, wow, actually hatched by Twilight? Did that make Twilight Spike's surrogate mother? If so, then they were a lot closer than I had thought.

"In fact, that was when she got her cutie mark!" Spike said, sounding as proud as if he had somehow called it down upon her flank himself. I usually did not tolerate young children very well, but Spike seemed a lot more mature than his years suggested. "And when she became Princess Celestia's student."

I paused. Her student?

Spike waved a claw. "Eh, but you probably know all about that sorta stuff. You sound like you're pretty smart."

"Oh, um, but you were right there. You got to see a lot of it yourself."

Spike chuckled. "Heh, true, like the time Twilight accidentally set Princess Celestia's throne on fire."

I nearly choked on my broccoli. "She did what??"

"Oops!" Spike cried, his eyes wide. "Ah ... er ... d-did I say 'on fire'? No, no, I meant, um ... all fine. Yeah, that's what I meant! She made it all fine and dandy. No fire at all!"

I giggled madly. I couldn't help it, it was stress relief.

Poor Spike blushed so hard. "Look, please, don't tell her I mentioned that. She still gets embarrassed about it."

I kept giggling.

He twiddled his talons. "Um ... I'll give you extra daffodils if you keep this quiet."

I looked down at my tray. I had wondered if that's what they were. I had yet to try them, despite how tasty they smelled. I dipped my muzzle and took one in my mouth.

Oh, good Lord. I was eating a damn flower, and it was delicious. "Deal!"

Spike jumped off his chair. "One shameless bribe, coming right up!"

I placed a hoof to my muzzle to hide my laugh. Thank you, Spike, I really needed that.

After a pleasant lunch (good God, those daffodils were wonderful), some time remained before Fluttershy would be by to pick me up. I didn't see the point in going all the way back to my room, so I decided to head to the main entrance to await her arrival. Spike offered to lead me there.

At the wide hallway before the meeting room, a familiar bouncing noise drew near. "Oh, Spikey!" cried Pinkie Pie. "You're just the dragon I want to see! Well, actually, you're the only dragon in about a hundred mile radius, but I still need to see you, and, well, you are a dragon, so--"

"What did you need, Pinkie?" Spike asked, mercifully cutting her off.

"I need some help with the final preparations for dinner," said Pinkie. "Do you have a minute? Twilight's all busy with boring summit-stuff."

"Sure, I've got some time." Spike turned to me. "Think you can find the entrance from here, Candy?"

"Yeah, I got it," I said. I smiled. "Thanks, Spike."

Spike smiled and winked before heading off with Pinkie.

The main entrance lay just ahead, the wide hallway empty save for a guard stationed on either side, as well as the two who constantly shadowed me. I glanced towards the high doors that led to the meeting room, my gaze lingering.

I glanced back at my guards. They gazed stoically forward, as if taking no interest in me other than my existence and my safety. Would they stop me from trying to enter the room? No guards were stationed outside the doors.

I turned and started towards the doors. The guards followed without a word of protest. Were the doors locked against my unauthorized ... no, they opened easily at the touch of my hoof.

I took a deep breath and stepped inside. I steeled myself as I heard the hooves of the guards, but they had simply arranged themselves to guard the door to the chamber, flanking it on either side. I was left alone inside.

I stepped forward and immediately froze.

The "high-backed chairs" I had seen in my brief glimpse the night before were nothing less than thrones. Six in all, equally spaced around -- wait, there was a seventh, though much smaller, breaking the symmetry.

The six large thrones lay around a circular table of crystal. A three-dimensional image shimmered above its surface.

It looked like a map. I saw mountains, valleys, lakes, rivers, oceans, plains, deserts, and tundra. Yet nothing was labeled. I had no point of reference. What stood out more than the topological features, however, were two sets of sparkling symbols floating just above the map, slowly spinning around one another. One was three white diamonds, the other three pink butterflies.

Rarity and Fluttershy's cutie marks?

When I looked more closely at that area of the map, I spotted a mountain spire with a castle in its side which I was almost sure was Canterlot. The symbols hovered over a town very close by, and when I squinted, I could just make out the Castle of Friendship. The symbols were located directly above it.

I raised my head and looked more closely at the thrones. Each of the six large ones had a symbol etched high into the back. Each matched a cutie mark of the six ponies I had come to know.

What the hell was this? This looked far more important than a mere town council. Was this a map of all of Equestria? Why were Rarity and Fluttershy's cutie marks on the map?

I sighed and lightly stomped a fore-hoof. All I could do was guess. This chamber had handed me more pieces of a jigsaw puzzle where I had no idea how many pieces existed, or even what the final picture was supposed to look like. More than ever I wanted to visit the castle library.

I heard hooves clopping faintly in the distance. "Candy?" came Fluttershy's voice.

Damn, I had hoped to leave the chamber before she had arrived. I poked my head into the hallway. Fluttershy had just stepped beyond the main castle entrance, and she turned her head to the side. I bolted out of the chamber and skidded to a stop just ahead the guards, who immediately took a step to flank me on either side.

Fluttershy turned her head at the noise and smiled. "There you are, Candy. Are you ready to go?"

"Yes, I was just waiting right here." Well, technically, I had not quite lied. I simply had an expansive definition of the word "here." I smiled and trotted over to her.

Fluttershy glanced past me towards the open doors to the council chamber. "Um ..."

"Let's go, I'm anxious to see how the dress looks."

She turned her gaze back to me. "Oh, of course."

I fell into step beside her, guards in tow. I burned with the desire to ask Fluttershy what that map was all about, but I let it keep for the moment. Did it really matter? I enjoyed my time with both her and Rarity. I needed to stop finding ways to spoil it.

"You will be very happy to know, Candy, that I have smoothed things over with Shining Armor," said Rarity as we stood in the back room of her boutique.

I did not respond immediately. The dress had so enthralled me that I still stared at it even as I modeled it for her. She had done an incredible job in the space of a few hours. I finally turned my head towards her. "I'm really glad to hear that. Did he really think I was associated with Discord, or that I was a changeling spy?"

"Realize that he spent much of his professional life in the service of Princess Celestia's Royal Guard," said Rarity, spectacles perched on her muzzle as she carefully measured a strip of ribbon. "He was trained to be suspicious, and it can be said he has a, ah, personal grievance with Queen Chrysalis."

So he really had been a knight in shining armor. God, these pony names. "I just didn't want anypony to be upset over me."

"Nonsense." Rarity finished the cut at her workbench and trotted over to me. She magicked the ribbon onto the dress to complete part of the trim. "Now, hold still if you would, please. I chose to hoof-stitch this part as the material in the trim is a bit delicate."

Well, she really meant horn-stitch, as her magic did the work of carefully weaving the needle through the dress, but still, I watched in wonder as she worked.

"And realize that Twilight was defending you as well," said Rarity. "I impressed upon him that you are more a victim of these circumstances than a cause."

Yet the more I thought about it, the more I balked at the timing of my arrival in this world. I had appeared with this strange pendant right about when they planned this summit. I would have been suspicious had our roles been reversed. Despite the warnings to the contrary, I felt a need to meet Discord, if for no other reason than to satisfy in my own mind that I truly had no business with this miscreant.

As she worked on my dress, I glanced at her workbench. A large swath of black fabric lay carefully folded, to which Rarity had added some bright green trim. "Is that the banner for Queen Chrysalis?"

"Yes, and I am more pleased with it than I had thought I would be," said Rarity. "It is only a rough prototype. I decided to go with something simple and--" She glanced towards the clock. "Oh, dear!"

"Something the matter?"

"In all this excitement, I almost forgot I will need to pick up Sweetie Belle from school."

"Sweetie Belle?"

"My little sister," said Rarity, "Ever since the incident with the changeling at the hospital, the mayor imposed the requirement that the school foals be picked up by a parent or other relative. We also have to ask each other a question only the other can answer to ensure neither of us are changelings."

So Rarity's sister was a lot younger than I had thought. "Are her parents around?"

"Yes, but their careers dictate much travel, and they prefer Sweetie Belle's foalhood be a little more stable. Thus I have become her day-to-day guardian. If it were not for this security measure, she would be quite capable of being about Ponyville herself."

Which, of course, implied this little filly lived with Rarity. So much for not worrying about a sibling feeling in competition for affection. I just hoped I would not be pressed into service helping to care for this foal. With any luck, Sweetie Belle had her own circle of friends her own age and would just ignore me. My lack of cutie mark would likely mean I would be of little interest to her or her friends anyway.

"There we go!" Rarity said, trimming the thread with a pair of scissors before sending thread and needle back to her workbench. "Does it fit well? Try moving around a bit."

It did, surprisingly well, in fact. "It's just great, Rarity, thank you."

She smiled and levitated the dress from me and onto a ponnequin. "I still need to accessorize it with the gems, but I don't need you modeling it for that. I was considering adding a floral pattern, something in a muted rose red that would blend with the base colors. It would look more like a texture, just a subtle enhancement that plays well in the light."

I smiled. "I'm sure it'll be just fine."

"Fluttershy can take you back to the castle, unless you wanted to go down to the schoolhouse with me while I pick up Sweetie Belle."

I did not feel ready to meet little kids yet. "I'll head over to the castle, if that's okay."

"Of course. Now, I hope to get there by three, but I may be a little late. I imagine the dinner will be the first time that the princesses will be free to meet with guests anyway, so that gives us some time to fit the dress to you, weave the gems into your tail, and touch up your coiffure if needed."

Some of the butterflies returned to my stomach. The prospect of meeting all that royalty daunted me a bit, especially Princess Luna. Perhaps that sounded a bit strange that meeting the supposed divine mover of the sun scared me less, but Princess Celestia apparently did not have the ability to see into my dreams.

Even my own thoughts could not remain completely sacrosanct in this world.

Rarity smiled gently. "No need to be nervous about the dinner. While meeting Princess Celestia and Princess Luna is a great honor not many ponies experience, they are very pleasant conversationalists. Just be yourself, and everything will be fine."

The term "be yourself" still struggled to define itself, and I doubted it would settle in time before dinner. But no pressure!

Author's Note

The bit about Sweetie Belle's parents having to travel a lot I thought sounded like a plausible explanation for why she hangs around Rarity so much. I don't recall it being mentioned in the show, so it's more my own headcanon. Feel free to correct me in the comments if I'm wrong.

Chapter 11 - Summoned By Royalty

I stood alone in my room, staring at the mirror and failing to recognize myself.

No one thing defied my ability to identify the face that peered curiously from the glass. Not the pony body, nor the expertly coiffed mane. Not the gorgeous dress, nor the glittering rubies woven so perfectly into my tail. Not even the bright gold pendant which hung from my neck in defiance of those who would take it from me.

Rarity had helped me into my dress, added the rubies, and left me alone to contemplate her creation while she and Fluttershy changed into their outfits. I was sure she thought I needed time alone in case I had another emotional episode, but my stomach had twisted itself into too many knots for me to properly commiserate with the past.

An occasional faint clacking noise alerted me that I could not stop flicking my tail. I took a deep breath, but it did little to calm my pounding heart, and the clacking continued.

I finally realized that the situation and not my appearance had frustrated my sense of identity. What was I doing here? Why did I agree to attend this dinner? I should have asserted myself more and remained in my room for the duration. I had no business meeting royalty.

No, Princess Luna had not filled me with some sort of mortal dread. I only thought I wanted to gallop off and hide somewhere when I contemplated meeting her, like I faced some sort of grand test of my facade.

Yet the idea that I could pull this off floated before me like the carrot on the stick -- perhaps not the most ideal analogy for a pony, but still. I had only just broached the idea earlier of never revealing my past, of settling down with this new identity, and casting off the past. If I could get through this, I had every chance of succeeding.

As if my mind insisted on a counterpoint, Rarity's words echoed in my head: I doubt your past would ever change how we feel about you. By human standards -- my failures to Michelle and my mother notwithstanding -- I had done nothing truly bad. Even while living on the streets, I never hurt anyone. I stole something small here and there, but only to survive.

Yet it could all pale in comparison to being an alien.

I heard a knock at the door. "May we come in?" said Rarity.

I turned away from the mirror. "Of course."

Rarity and Fluttershy entered, wearing rather elegant outfits; I no longer felt quite so overdressed. "Do you like how your dress came out, Candy?" Rarity asked.

"Yes, I do, thank you. It's beautiful."

I managed not to choke up even as the memory of my twelfth birthday flickered in my head. I squelched it a little more easily this time.

Rarity trotted up to me. "In that case, I believe we are ready to go. Do you remember everything I told you earlier, or do you need a reminder?"

Rarity had mercifully assumed I had never stood before Equestrian royalty (well, other than Twilight), and had taught me the proper way to bow (which I previously had no idea how to do as a pony), the proper form of address ("Princess" was sufficient from their subjects), and how to carry myself ("with grace in all things," which I highly suspected was more Rarity's attitude than a requirement).

"Is there anything specific I will be expected to say or do?" I asked.

In a roundabout way, I wanted to know if any subjects of conversation were considered taboo, or if I were expected simply to defer to them in everything they said or did.

"Well, praise for their enlightened rule never goes out of style, of course, but they tend to be a little less stiff and formal than the Canterlot nobility," said Rarity.

"They really are friendly and nice," said Fluttershy with a small smile. "I, um, don't even feel nervous around Princess Luna anymore."

Fluttershy's first sentence had filled me with hope while the second had sent me crashing back into the depths of worry.

"And well you shouldn't," said Rarity. "It has been quite a long time since her Nightmare Moon days."

Nightmare Moon? Girls, please, stop helping me.

"She has come a long way since then," Rarity continued. "But then again, so have we. Funny this should come up, as I had spoken with Candy earlier about our Element-bearer days."

Our days? Was Fluttershy one of these Element-bearers as well?

"I-I have to admit, I kind of wish we had them now," Fluttershy said in a quavering voice.

"We have nothing to worry about," declared Rarity. "Not inside the Castle of Friendship."

"I know. It's just ... I still remember what happened at the wedding." Fluttershy paused and added in a lower voice, "So does Twilight."

"Is that what you two talked about yesterday?"

"Yes, pretty much. She was rather upset after her argument with Rainbow Dash."

"Can you share anything of what was said?"

Fluttershy hesitated. "Um, not right now. We need to get to the dinner."

"Very well." Rarity turned to me. "If you're ready, then, Candy."

"I'm ready," I lied.

"Then let us be off. It has been far too long since I had attended a nice, formal dinner."

More puzzle pieces that defied placement. I had to defer my concern. I had only so many things I could worry about at once.

I stepped into the banquet hall, and my heart leaped into my throat.

Princess Luna riveted my attention immediately. Even from the other end of the hall, she possessed a commanding presence. That she had looked no less real in my dreams finally impressed upon me how vivid they had been. They truly felt like pockets of altered reality rather than just thoughts and imagery.

When my gaze finally shifted towards the pony facing Luna, I knew her identity at once.

Princess Celestia stood a little taller than Luna, with a coat so white it seemed to glow. A golden, stylized sun graced her flank. Her horn was very long, longer than Luna's. Her mane and tail flowed as if blowing in a gentle breeze, striped in pastel colors nearly as liquid as her darker counterpart. Her wings were folded against her sides, but even quiescent they looked larger than any other winged pony I had seen. As if she really needed anything to further identify her as an absolute monarch, a tiara lay upon her head.

The two appeared to be speaking softly to one another. My heart skipped a beat when Luna turned her head, and her eyes met mine. Her gaze lingered on me for a moment before turning away.

So no sense of my soul being sucked out through my eyes when she looked at me. Not that I believed that would happen at all, just good to know.

My gaze finally swept down the length of the hall. Against the right side, a line of tables stood covered in more food than I had ever seen in any one sitting. Everything from vegetables and greens, to flowers and oats, to breads and desserts. Smaller, round tables and chairs had been set up on the opposite side.

"Hrm," Rarity said, raising a critical eyebrow. "Buffet-style. Not my first choice for a formal dinner to open a summit, but I defer to Pinkie's catering sensibilities."

"Oh, I don't know," said Fluttershy. "I think it makes it a little less formal."

I was with Fluttershy in that regard. I felt just a little bit less self-conscious.

The other members of the Council of Six -- as I started calling them -- were here, all dressed in finery. Even Applejack, though the effect was spoiled a bit by the stetson. Rainbow Dash actually stood on her hooves with her wings folded sedately against her sides. Perhaps her dress was not aerodynamic enough for her.

"--get the ideer from you to have the little 'uns escorted to and from school?" came Applejack's voice as we approached.

"No, that was Mayor Mare's idea entirely," said Twilight.

"Well, it was a good one, in any case."

Rainbow rolled her eyes. "I think it's ridiculous if you ask me."

"Good thing I wasn't," Applejack said with a slight smirk.

Rainbow blew her a raspberry. "Look, if anypony can handle themselves, it's the Crusaders!"

Crusaders?

"Like they do with every consarned hare-brained scheme of theirs?"

"I'm just saying it's wrong to keep them separated!"

"They ain't separated, they got school together."

Rainbow face-hoofed. "Oh, yeah, sure, that's a lot of fun. Maybe there's a cutie mark for good attendance."

Pinkie Pie interrupted the debate with a sudden high-pitched gasp, her eyes wide as she leaped into the air ... and hung there for several seconds, like she had just graduated from the Wile E. Coyote school of physics.

"Candy!!" she cried at the top of her lungs when she finally landed. "You look positively, prodigiously, powerfully, partytastically pretty!" She giggled and waved a hoof. "But then you knew that, didn't you?"

Good Lord. I did not need that. Now the gaze from everypony in the room weighed on me, even from the two princesses. From the amused looks on their faces, however, they appeared used to Pinkie's antics.

"You really do look purty, Candy," said Applejack with a smile. "Like the shine on an apple jus' ready to be bucked."

I ... think that was a compliment.

"You really do look lovely, Candy," said Twilight. "The dress is wonderful."

"Thank you, everypony," I said, smiling slightly. "But thank Rarity for the dress."

"I am rather proud of it," said Rarity. "I went with something simple but elegant in the limited time I had. I just may adapt it for a new line this season."

Rainbow trotted up. "Hey, Rares, now that you're here, maybe you can settle something."

Rarity rolled her eyes. "Would this happen to be about the Crusaders?"

"Do you have to keep Sweetie Belle cooped up in the boutique after school?"

"For her safety, yes. At least until this summit is over."

"Come on! Can't you at least let her out so they can have their meetings? I mean, they're just gonna be at their clubhouse! It's right there on AJ's farm. I already convinced Scoot's parents to let me escort her over there."

"Ya did what?" Applejack cried. "Fer cryin' out loud, Rainbow! Can't ya leave well enough alone?"

"All right, enough," Rarity declared. "We should not be arguing about this at a formal dinner. Why is this so important to you, Rainbow?"

"Because they're gonna want to here about their fellow crusader in Manehattan."

"What is this?"

Applejack smiled. "Apple Bloom got a letter from her cousin Babs Seed. It got here too late fer me to give it to her before I had to get ready for this here shindig. But I already know what's in it 'cuz her parents sent me a letter at the same time. Babs Seed got her cutie mark."

"Really?" Rarity said. "That is wonderful news, Applejack."

"Yes, that really is good news," said Fluttershy.

"Aw, too bad it happened over in Manehattan," said Pinkie. "I would love to organize her cuteceañera to celebrate!"

"But you see the problem?" Rainbow said. "Babs was running the Manehattan Cutie Mark Crusaders. They gotta know about that."

Rarity sighed. "Very well. I will see if I can get some time in the next few days to escort Sweetie Belle to the farm. Applejack, can you keep that letter to yourself for the time being?"

"Sure can," said Applejack.

"Honestly, I was just telling Sweetie Belle earlier that they worry far too much about acquiring their cutie marks."

That at least explained why the Council of Six were not concerned about my lack of cutie mark. That made me feel a little better.

The feeling was short lived. I caught movement out of the corner of my eye. I stiffened a bit when I saw Shining Armor headed towards us.

Rarity caught sight of him as well and turned. "Ah, just the stallion I wanted to see."

Shining Armor had looked about to speak to me, but he turned towards Rarity instead. "You do?"

"Yes. I believe you have something to say to Candy here."

"Well, yes, but how did you ... oh, you mean ...?"

Rarity looked at him expectantly.

Shining Armor took a deep breath and turned towards me. "Miss Swirl, I wish to apologize for my behavior towards you earlier today. It was uncalled for and rude."

I hesitated until Rarity nudged me in the side. "Oh, um, yes, thank you. I, uh, accept your apology."

"Much better," said Rarity with a smile. Twilight also smiled and cast an affectionate look at her brother.

"Now for what I had really come over here to say to Miss Swirl," said Shining Armor.

My heart sank.

"Princess Celestia and Princess Luna would like a chance to speak with you at your earliest convenience."

Fluttershy had offered to accompany me, but I didn't want to keep leaning on her all the time. If the princesses did have some sort of bone to pick with me, I did not want to involve the others. Nopony seemed at all perturbed at this summoning, yet visions of dark and dank dungeons plagued my thoughts as I approached.

I had yet to announce myself, but both princesses turned towards me as I approached. Luna stood far taller than I had remembered her from my dreams, until I realized ponies likely stood shorter than humans. Celestia practically loomed over me, at least with regard to her physical presence. A smile graced her muzzle that I hoped was as warm as it seemed.

Did she really move the sun? If size mattered with regards to horns, I guess I could see how that was possible.

Luna was not exactly smiling, nor did she appear hostile or accusing in her gaze. She seemed more curious than anything else. I felt stupid that I had never made the connection between her name and the night. Or I simply had not wanted to see it.

What was considered a respectable distance? I had not thought to ask Rarity. I stopped when their heads dipped slightly to keep their gaze on me, and I dropped into an awkward bow, lowering my head.

God, what was I doing here? Was I being judged? Was I trembling? Would that be misinterpreted?

"You may rise."

I flinched at Princess Celestia's voice. How long had I been bowed? I stood and looked up.

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Candy Swirl," said Princess Celestia.

"As it is for me as well," said Princess Luna.

Even Luna's voice was exactly the same as in my dreams. "Um ... the p-pleasure is all mine, Princess Celestia, Princess Luna."

"Twilight Sparkle has kept me informed of the events concerning your pendant," said Celestia. "I do hope they have not left a bad impression on you."

"Um ... bad impression?"

"Concerning your arrival, of course," said Luna.

Did she mean Ponyville? She had to. She would be interrogating me much further otherwise. "Oh, well ... Pinkie Pie sort of took care of that while I was in the hospital with her ... uh ... song."

Celestia chuckled. "That is certainly a much better impression to leave upon you."

"So long as her presence was not too overwhelming," added Luna.

"Oh, but Pinkie Pie always exercises the most exquisite discretion and a rational approach to any situation, dear sister."

"Indeed she does. Only the other day I was thinking she would have been much better suited as the Element of Calm Restraint."

"Huh??" I blurted.

Celestia and Luna looked at each other and laughed. That had been a joke? They were sisters? Pinkie was another Element-bearer? My head spun.

Luna smiled at me. "Do not be so involved in your personal struggles that you fail to see the lighter side of life, Candy Swirl. If anypony knows how such a thing can consume oneself, it would be me."

What was I supposed to say to that?

Celestia took a step towards me. "And my advice to you, Candy Swirl, would be to trust in your friends."

Trust in my friends?

I had no friends. No, maybe that was too harsh. I supposed I had ponies who wanted to be my friends. Certainly Rarity and Fluttershy, but even they had known me for only a few days. Was Princess Celestia making an assumption? Perhaps she was powerful, but I doubted she was omniscient.

The map in the council room stirred in my thoughts again, with Rarity and Fluttershy's cutie marks floating above the castle. Was my attempt to associate it with me just the height of paranoia? Maybe I needed to stop thinking everything revolved around me.

"Thank you, Princess," I said, though my voice sounded a bit stilted even to me. "Um, both of you. I'll try to remember that."

Princess Celestia smiled gently. "Please feel free to return to the festivities. I am sure you wish to avail yourself of the wonderful dinner Pinkie Pie managed to organize in such a short time."

"Yes, of course. Thank you." I backed up a few steps before I remembered to bow again. I stood and tried to keep my pace to no faster than a trot as I retreated.

Rarity met me halfway back to the others. "That audience was rather short. Did it go well?"

I honestly had no idea. "Um, yes, I think it went fine."

"You do look a little rattled."

"Just nervousness over meeting them for the first time, that's all."

"Mm, yes, my first experience with Canterlot nobility was like that. Always worried about saying the right thing or maintaining the proper decorum. If it helps any, from what I saw from here, you handled yourself wonderfully."

I smiled faintly. "Thanks."

"We were about to sit down to have some dinner," said Rarity. "Please come and join us."

I looked around. The princesses were talking with Twilight. Shining Armor was conversing with some guards. Applejack and Rainbow Dash were having a spirited debate. I had managed to sink into the background again, which suited me fine.

"Yes, I would like that," I said. Some of the butterflies in my stomach had fled; I could actually eat something.

I still ate light, as only a few hours had passed since lunch. This was fortuitous, as Pinkie plied me with sweets and confections just when I was ready to head back to my room. I could not leave until I had sampled at least one of everything. Apparently she intended to make good on her claim that I needed to "catch up" in desserts.

That they were so tasty thwarted my efforts to resist.

The sun hung low in the sky by the time I returned to my room. I yawned through a farewell to Fluttershy before closing the door, and my stomach gurgled in protest against an overabundance of sugar.

I wanted to sleep, but I was too buzzed from gratuitous desserts. I discovered a remedy sitting on the dresser. I had made an offhand comment earlier to Twilight about having nearly completed the Daring Do book. Apparently she had Spike deliver the next story in the series to my room.

This induced energy tempted me to head over to the library, but my fear of running into Queen Chrysalis outweighed curiosity. Neither the efficiency of the guards, nor their ability to detect the changeling queen's magic, could compel me to make myself a target.

The opportunity to wear Rarity's great effort may never come again, yet I removed it with as much care as my still unskilled hooves would allow. History had repeated itself; I had done the same thing with the dress my mother had made for my twelfth birthday. An occasion "special enough" to urge me to wear it again had never come, and my mother's passing had dried up any further opportunities.

I took a deep breath and shuddered. I wiped an eye before climbing into bed with the book.

Not until the moon had well risen did I finally feel like I could sleep. I resolved not to let Pinkie tempt me ever again. I slid out of bed to use the bathroom. On the way back, I spotted something on the floor.

A folded piece of paper had been slipped under the door.

I trotted over and failed to open it with a single hoof. I sighed as I plopped down on my haunches. That was the most annoying problem with being a quadruped: having to sit down to use both my fore-hooves.

I unfolded the document and read:

It is of the utmost importance we meet privately. We have very much to discuss. Your future disposition in Equestria hangs in the balance. I cannot guarantee your safety if you do not respond to this summons. Be at the balcony at the end of the Guest Hall at midnight. Do not be late.

-- Concerned Royalty

My blood ran cold. I swallowed hard and lifted a trembling hoof to my pendant.

Concerned Royalty? Who had sent this? Princess Celestia? No, the tone was too harsh, if my short time with her had been any indication of her disposition. Princess Luna? Maybe. Her speech patterns were a touch more formal. Princess Twilight? No, that made even less sense than Celestia.

It had to be Luna. Dear God, she knew. She knew. Her words to me at dinner had been oh-so-carefully crafted. She had indeed meant my arrival in this world. Did Celestia know? Was Luna keeping this from her? Was Celestia's wrath a terrible thing to behold despite her friendly nature, and Luna was protecting me from her?

I saw myself in the alley again, facing down the bullet, knowing it should have pierced my heart. I had obviously blown that second chance, and now I had another. I could not screw this up again.

I stood and opened the door. One of the guards immediately turned to me. "Yes, Miss Swirl?"

"I-inform me when it's midnight," I said. "No, I mean ... ten minutes to midnight. If I'm asleep, wake me up."

The guard hesitated, but nodded once. "Of course, Miss Swirl."

"Also, did you see who slipped the paper under my door?"

The guard gave me a confused look. "I'm sorry? Paper?"

"Nopony has approached your door since Miss Fluttershy departed," said the other guard.

"Do you need us to summon Prince Shining Armor?" asked the first.

"No!" I blurted. "I ... I-I'm sorry, I was mistaken. Fluttershy had said she wanted to ... to give me a document, and I likely just dropped it by the door."

"No worries, Miss Swirl," said the first guard.

"We will summon you at ten to midnight as you requested," said the second guard.

"Thank you," I said before closing the door.

I doubted I needed to insist they wake me up. No way would sleep overtake me now.

A knock at the door jolted me back to full wakefulness.

"Miss Swirl? It is ten before midnight."

Somehow I had actually nodded off. Hearing the time instantly banished my lingering grogginess as I slipped out of bed and cantered to the door. "Yes, thank you," I said upon opening it. I stepped into the hall and glanced at each guard, opening my mouth to give them a completely unnecessary order. I closed it without a word and simply trotted forward.

The guards, as expected, fell into step with me, the only sound that of their hooves and the occasional clink of their armor.

Each of the other guest rooms were guarded as well, but as my eyes fell on what I assumed was Princess Luna's room, I flinched and stopped dead. Her guards appeared to be pegasi at first glance, but their wings were much different. Instead of feathered, they appeared leathery, almost bat-like.

They turned their heads towards me and regarded me with a narrowed gaze. I swallowed hard and continued on.

I gazed through the glass doors of the balcony. It lay empty. I almost hoped the doors were locked. Instead, they unlatched and opened easily at my touch. I shivered, more so than the cool air could account. I took a deep breath and trotted towards the railing.

Something shimmered just past the edge. I pushed a hoof forward, and my eyes widened as it met resistance, ripples spreading from my touch.

"A shield, Miss Swirl," said one of the guards, his voice giving me a start. "Courtesy of Prince Shining Armor."

I tilted my head. It curved around the entire castle. Fascinated, I failed to note the doors to the balcony opening again. Only when my guards turned and one cried, "What is this?!" did I whirl around.

My breath caught in my throat. Oh, dear God, what ...??

I had expected Luna, or maybe Celestia. This being certainly had the height and general shape of one of the alicorns, but all resemblance ended there. She was midnight black, with a twisted horn rising from her head, and translucent wings more like those of an insect. Her eyes were large, somewhat slit-pupiled, and bright green. Strands of teal hair spilled from her head. Holes pierced her legs near her hooves and shot through her wings. Chitin covered part of her barrel.

She was flanked by two Royal Guards, but they gave me no more sense of security than my own.

She cast her gaze at me and smiled. I shivered when I glimpsed her fangs. "Well, now, might this be Candy Swirl?" she said, her voice sounding disconcertingly like two voices at frequencies very slightly out of sync with one another. "Very good. You chose to answer my summons. This bodes well."

She stepped forward. I gasped and backed away. The sharp scrape of steel against steel sounded as first my guards crossed their spears in front of me, and the other guards crossed theirs before this creature.

"Advance no further!" one of my guards bellowed.

"With all due respect, Queen Chrysalis," said the other, confirming my worst fears as to the identity of this monster. "You should not be out of your room."

Queen Chrysalis narrowed her eyes. "I do not recall being confined to my room for the duration of this summit!"

"Nevertheless, you are not to approach Miss Swirl!"

"I wish to have a private conversation with her. All of you are to leave us at once."

"We cannot do that on your orders alone."

Chrysalis smiled. "Then perhaps we should let Miss Swirl decide."

My guards exchanged a look. "I would not recommend that course of action, Miss Swirl," said one.

I sure as hell didn't either! But nothing could silence the question shouting in the back of my mind as to why this creature wished to speak to me. Certainly she knew she could not make off with my pendant due to the binding magic. Or with me for that matter, not with this shield in place.

I swallowed hard before I demanded of the changeling queen, "Give me one good reason why I should send the guards away!"

The Queen's smile widened. "The girl in the alleyway."

My heart fell into my hooves. No, she couldn't mean ...

"And the fact that I know precisely who -- and what -- that little girl is."

I trembled. "Y-you're lying."

"This same little girl lost a friend so terribly, all because she did not get there in time. Her mother a few years before that. Tsk, such a terrible life, and all because of a little trinket she--"

"Stop it!" I screamed.

A guard turned to me. "Miss Swirl, are you--"

"Leave us alone," I said.

"Miss Swirl, I don't think this is a good idea."

"Y-you can detect her magic, right? That's what Twi ... what Princess Twilight said. You'll know if she uses it on me."

"Yes, we will, but not until after the fact."

"But she can't get out of here without you knowing. She can't take anything from me and run off with it."

"Well, no, but--"

"Then leave."

The guard sighed but nodded to his cohort, and they lifted their spears. The other guards near Chrysalis did the same. "We will stand right outside the balcony doors, Miss Swirl. Signal us immediately if you need help. We will come in if we detect the least bit of unauthorized magic from her, or if she appears to be harming you in any way."

"Understood," I said in a low voice.

The guards left. I looked up at Queen Chrysalis, resisting the urge to cringe. "The guards are gone. Now, talk."

Queen Chrysalis stepped forward. "Oh, I intend to. About a great many things ..."

Chapter 12 - Nothing Is Simple

"So what else do you know about me?" I demanded of the changeling queen. Taking even just the illusion of initiative in the conversation stopped me from being completely scared out of my wits.

"I know you are not really a pony," said Chrysalis with a sly smile.

I bristled. I actually wanted to contradict her. "How do you know all this?"

"Does it matter? The point is, if I have discovered this, so can your little pony friends. What do you think they'll do if they find out?"

I stomped a hoof. "Is that what this is about?! You're going to blackmail me into giving you the pendant?"

Chrysalis laughed as she started to slowly pace about the balcony. "Don't be so foolish, little not-pony. I have no interest in whether or not the ponies discover your secret. Continue to deceive them for as long as you wish. I find it amusing."

"I'm not here for your amusement."

Chrysalis narrowed her eyes at me. "But that's just it. You have no reason for being in Equestria at all."

"I had a choice," I said in a hollow voice.

She stepped up to me. My ears flattened against my head. I forced myself to meet her eyes. "Really?" said Chrysalis. "Is that the belief you've falsely labored under all this time?"

"Wh-what do you mean by that?"

"Oh, I am sure Discord made you think you had a choice, but that is not how he operates."

My mouth dropped open, and my blood ran cold.

Chrysalis chuckled. "Or did you not know that was who brought you here?"

I squeezed my eyes shut. I forced the words through clenched teeth. "H-he ... he never told me his name ... he said he was a Spirit of Chaos."

She started to pace again; I heard her hooves moving off to the side and around me. "That, my dear, is Discord."

My chest became tight, and I felt like I couldn't breathe. "And ... a-and Fluttershy is supposed to be friends with him."

Chrysalis' hooves stopped behind me. "What is this?"

I heard the rising interest in the changeling queen's voice. I didn't want to give her the satisfaction, but my thoughts became sluggish for a moment, as if a wave of exhaustion had crashed over me, then just as suddenly vanished. I swallowed hard and opened my eyes. "I heard the other ponies mention his name, but I-I never made the connection."

"Or perhaps they never intended for you to."

I shook my head. "No, that ... I'm sure they just assumed I knew who Discord was. I mean, he's well-known here, isn't he?"

Chrysalis circled back around to face me. "Tell me: did any of them claim that he was being reformed? That he was better than he used to be?"

"Fluttershy had," I said in a small voice. "Twilight ... I overheard Twilight tell her brother that she didn't think Discord was involved in my appearance."

Chrysalis uttered a low chuckle. "Seems to me they're keeping a great many things from you, dear Candy Swirl."

"But if she really didn't know Discord had--"

"She is a Princess!" Chrysalis bellowed, and I retreated a half-step. "It is her business to know such things! But like all royalty, it is her choice as to whom she reveals what she knows. And how much." Her eyes narrowed, and her lips twisted into a grin. "Perhaps even to manipulate a little scared not-pony into giving up her pendant."

As she resumed her pacing, I pressed my hoof into my pendant, and I felt my heart trying to pound its way out of my chest.

I had to take more control of this conversation. This had to be a fishing expedition. My fear of her would only work against me. Or ... was I frightened of something else? My thoughts slowed again, perhaps because I didn't want to face the possibility that the others had been lying to me all this time.

I shook my head. "No, this is stupid," I muttered in response to my own thoughts, but my conviction was weak. "Twilight wanted to protect me."

Chrysalis stopped. "Did she now?"

Again, that tone of malevolent interest, yet now it drew me like a moth to a flame. "Yes. She said the pendant had powerful magic. She wanted to keep it shielded."

She stepped up to me and lifted a hoof. I backed away as she pointed her hole-infested appendage at my pendant. "And yet she allowed you to continue wearing it."

"I don't have a choice!" I cried. "It has some sort of binding magic that returns it to me unless I give it up willingly."

Chrysalis lowered her hoof. "And how did you learn of this?" She chuckled. "Let me guess: Twilight told you, and you believed it."

"I've seen the binding magic work!"

"Did she not offer to break it for you?"

"She said she didn't know how."

Chrysalis threw her head back and laughed. "The Princess of Magic? An alicorn? Unable to perform such a simple magical feat?"

"She told me it was very difficult!"

"More lies! They are taking advantage of your lack of knowledge of this world!"

"B-but they don't know where I'm really from."

Chrysalis chuckled. "So they say."

My head spun around the question I finally dared to ask: could they have been lying to me all this time? Why was I even entertaining the notion? Yet why shouldn't I? How was I supposed to know who was telling me the truth?

That, of course, included the changeling queen herself. I leveled my gaze at her. "Tell me why I should believe you. They ... th-they've been nothing but nice towards me. Rarity even wants to foster me."

Chrysalis resumed pacing. "Hrm. So I have heard."

"And Rarity believes what Twilight said about the pendant. Unless you're going to claim that Twilight is lying to all of them. Or they're all in this stupid conspiracy of yours together." I started to turn, intending to follow her as she walked.

Chrysalis' eyes flicked over me. "Take a good look at that pendant, Candy Swirl."

I stopped moving, frowned, and looked down. "What about it?"

"Keep looking at it, and remember."

"Huh? Remember what?"

"Remember the alleyway."

I swallowed hard. "I would rather not."

"Oh, but it is very important that you do."

Thoughts became like thick taffy, and I blinked rapidly. She next spoke into my ear from right behind me. I whirled around and nearly fell back on my haunches as her face loomed barely a hoof's breadth from my muzzle.

"That is, if you want to see what really brought you here," said Chrysalis in a silky voice.

I panted hard, as if again running from my pursuers. What the hell did she mean? I had no breath to ask. I pressed my hoof to my pendant as I struggled to recall memories I had wanted to cast off.

Chrysalis resumed her infernal pacing. I tried to follow her with my gaze, but it distracted me from my recollection. "Discord brought me here," I said in a quavering voice. "What more is there to know?"

"Think back further than that!" Chrysalis snapped. "How did you come into the predicament that gave that infernal draconequus an excuse to intervene? What happened?"

"I ... they pursued me into the alley. I wasn't sure if they really knew I was there because it was so dark. I tried to hide, but ... they found me."

Chrysalis stopped before me. "Yes, they found you. Why?"

"Because ..."

And I remembered ...

~~~

Footsteps sounded like lead blocks tramping against the detritus of the alley as the flashlight beam narrowed. I smelled old cigarettes and cheap booze. I held my breath. They were passing by me. They didn't see me. I was going to live another ...

I felt something like a mild electric shock against my hand, and my body jerked. The flashlight swung hard and blinded me.

~~~

My stomach lurched, and I tasted bile. My hoof covering the pendant dropped to the floor with a dull clop. "B-because the ..."

"Yes?"

I clenched my teeth. "The pendant ... j-jolted my hand ... like a little shock ... and ..."

"And they saw you. And they tried to kill you."

I stomped both fore-hooves to the floor and screamed, "How do you know all this?!"

Chrysalis frowned. "Does it matter? You ask questions which are irrelevant, and you continue to ignore what is right in front of your muzzle! The pendant is the ultimate cause of you coming to Equestria!"

My stomach heaved again. I stared down at the instrument of betrayal. All along I had known what really happened and ignored it. I wanted nothing more than to yank the pendant from my neck and fling it across the balcony.

I squeezed my eyes shut again and tried to breathe. No, I would not let myself hate Michelle. I would die before I did that. She had no idea this would happen. Yet for all of the changeling queen's vitriol, I could not deny what had happened. All she had done was force me to realize the truth.

I heard Chrysalis step up to me. "This pendant is a clear danger to you."

It could not be as simple as that ... yet a coherent thought failed to come to me for a moment ...

"It will continue to remain a danger so long as you possess it."

My fore-hoof rose as if to protect my pendant again, trembled, then dropped to the floor.

"And Twilight, the Princess of Magic, and the so-called Princess of Friendship, chose to let you continue to wear it despite the danger."

I gasped as I contemplated the unthinkable, that Twilight -- perhaps all of them -- had lied to me from the start. Yet ... Chrysalis had her own motivations, of which I had little clue except one. I opened my eyes and lifted my gaze to hers. "Let me guess. You want me to give the pendant to you."

Chrysalis smiled. "Is that not an obvious solution?"

It was. And simple. I could do it right then. I wanted nothing more to do with the pendant. In all my weakness, fury, and pain, I could willingly give up possession of it. My emotional dependency on it had finally been broken. Surely Michelle would not want me to keep it if she knew what it could do to me.

It wasn't her fault, and it wouldn't be my fault for giving it up.

Or I could wait and give it to Twilight. But if she had lied to me, I had no idea if I could trust her intentions anymore. Yet what exactly were Chrysalis' intentions?

"Just explain to me one thing," I said. "Why did one of your kind try to take it from me? Why did she try to trick me into giving it up?"

Chrysalis turned away and resuming pacing. "An overeager drone. One with far too much ambition and far too little forward thinking. I had told her of the threat your pendant posed to you, and she took matters into her own hooves. She will be severely disciplined."

Was that a plausible explanation? I wanted to believe so. Yet why didn't her drone just remind me of what the pendant had done to me in the alley like Chrysalis had done? I might have believed her.

My thoughts seemed to stick and grind, like gears trying to move against the force of the motor, hampering my ability to make sense of this. When my head cleared, my question did not make as much sense anymore. Of course this drone would not have thought of telling me, if she had acted as foolishly as Chrysalis claimed.

I did not flinch when I heard the changeling queen's voice behind me, and I listened willingly, almost eagerly. "Do you want to know why I am here for this summit, dear Candy Swirl? I am here to beg on behalf of my people for whatever scraps of kindness the alicorns will deign to bestow upon us."

"I-I don't understand."

Chrysalis snorted and stepped in front of me. "Then allow me to educate you. Your so-called friends were responsible for confining my hive to the badlands. Changelings thrive on emotions, and they saw fit to banish us to an uninhabited wasteland! They would just as soon see us all die of starvation and solve their 'problem' for them!"

I swallowed hard. Could they have really done such a thing?

Chrysalis stepped closer. "I know a little of the history of your world. Groups of beings persecuted for their beliefs, their culture, or simply for what they looked like. A pity if that would be allowed to happen here in Equestria, land of friendship, sunshine, and rainbows."

"What does this have to do with my pendant?" I cried. "Fine, maybe the ponies did all these bad things, but how does that involve me?"

"Twilight was absolutely right about one thing," said the changeling queen in a low, conspiratorial voice. "Your pendant is indeed a powerful magical artifact. As such, it is very valuable. If I possess it, it will give me great leverage over the alicorns."

"B-but what does it do?"

"Irrelevant! It is a bargaining chip, nothing more! Twilight's fascination with Starswirl the Bearded is practically a fetish. I intend to exploit it."

"And what about me?!" I shouted. "If these ponies really are as bad as you claim, what are they going to do to me when they find out I've given you the pendant?!"

Chrysalis laughed. "Simple. Tell them I found a way to break the binding magic and steal it from you. Considering their hatred of me, they will accept that. I will be very interested to know Twilight's reaction. Perhaps she will realize how foolish she was not to break the binding magic herself when she had the chance."

I lowered my head and let out a shaky sigh. Desperation drove me to acceptance of her words, yet some ill-defined need inside me still resisted. "They can't be all lying to me," I said in a small voice.

"Oh, really, now?" said Chrysalis, voice as smooth as oil.

My mind went fuzzy for a moment, and I lost my reply.

"I suppose you mean this nonsense about Rarity fostering you. A mere obligation on her part, I am sure."

I scraped a fore-hoof on the floor. My ears drooped. In my mind's eye. Rarity and Fluttershy's cutie marks floated above the castle on the glowing map. Like they were summoned, called to an obligation they had to fulfill, just another duty as part of whatever council they were on.

"But if I give you the pendant, I still have to face them," I said.

"Not if you are no longer in Equestria."

My head sprang up. I stared at her. "Wh-what??"

"I can offer you a way home."

My heart lurched. "A way ... home ... But how--?"

"You wished to know how I came to discover so much about you," said Chrysalis. "I have a means to access your world. Discord does not have a monopoly on such magic."

"But could you also change me back into ... into what I was?" Equestrian had no word for "human."

Chrysalis chuckled. "Shapeshifters like us not know how to do such magic? You need to pay a little more attention."

"I'm sorry, I just ... Discord made this sound permanent."

"Of course he did! That is how he toys with the destinies of other creatures! He will lie if it suits his agenda, or if he is bored, or it happens to be a Sunday. He is called the Spirit of Chaos for a reason."

"Shining Armor actually did think Discord was involved in this," I said in a weak voice.

"Then he is showing a rare moment of insight."

"H-he thought I was in league with him," I said in a shaky voice.

"And he will likely continue to believe so."

"But Rarity said she had straightened him out!"

"She can claim anything she wants to," said Chrysalis. "If it is her duty to do so."

I sighed. The map entered my head again.

"And you said Fluttershy is friends with Discord," Chrysalis sneered. "She has either been corrupted by his magic or is a blind fool. Can you trust a pony that has been either compromised or is so very gullible, let alone call her your friend? With so many ponies saying one thing, and so many saying another, can you truly trust anything anypony is telling you?"

"I-I don't know ..." I choked out, my eyes blurring.

"To me, your choice is very clear, Candy Swirl," said the changeling queen. "Give me the pendant. Claim I stole it from you. I will triumph over the alicorns and send you back to your world. You will never have to think of Equestria -- or be a pony -- ever again." She drew herself up to her full height. "It will simply no longer be your problem."

So simple.

So easy.

Just end the nightmare here. Another second chance, but back in my own body, back in my own world. A world I understood.

A world without a mother. A world without friends.

No, stop. Too many assumptions. I assumed I had friends here. I assumed I'd never make any back in my world. I assumed I deserved any in either place.

I just wanted the pain to go away.

I swallowed hard as I sat down on my haunches, tears dripping to the floor. I reached up with trembling hooves to my pendant. My breath quickened. My heart thumped so hard my chest ached. I moved my hooves to undo the clasp.

I hesitated.

It's a symbol of a close friendship I once had. I had told that to Rainbow Dash in the hospital room. She had stopped browbeating me, and then she had defended me against the changeling. She even hurt her head and acted like it was nothing! The one pony at the time I would have been glad to never see again, and she likely knew it, and yet she still did it.

Why?

Rarity made me a dress when she had little time to spare due to an overdue banner for the summit and ferrying her little sister to and from school. She even put me ahead of a paying customer.

Why?

Fluttershy never failed to offer a hug or a comforting word, even though every bit of her body language declared she felt more comfortable around animals than other ponies. In the hospital after the changeling attack, she had comforted me first.

Why?

Pinkie Pie wrote a song for me and sang it right in front of me in the hospital. Even in her own comical way, she nearly exploded with concern over my happiness from the start.

Why?

Even Applejack, despite harboring the most obvious skepticism towards some of my claims, never tried to call me out on it and exuded a trustworthiness I had never experienced before.

Why??

Was it true? Was it all an act? Was it conditional? Was it part of some greater game being played? Were they like Fluttershy might be, just pawns of Discord?

Could I go home again?

Why was nothing simple?!

I dropped my hooves. "Not yet."

"What?!" Chrysalis cried, startling me back on all four legs.

"I said not yet!"

"You are a fool to wait any longer!"

"Then I'll be a fool!" I shouted. "I was a fool to accept the pendant from my friend in the first place. I was a fool to run away. I was a fool for listening to Discord. Maybe I was even a fool to trust anypony here. What's being a fool a little longer going to cost me?!"

Chrysalis narrowed her eyes and clenched her teeth.

"Unless you can simply break the binding magic yourself and truly take it from me."

The changeling queen paused a long moment before she responded in a low, venomous voice, "No, I cannot."

"Then you have no choice. You'll just have to wait. I-I need time to think."

"I said I would not blackmail you for the pendant," Chrysalis said. "You must give it to me willingly to be free of the binding magic. But if you dare go against me, if you inform the ponies of our discussion and my desires, I will do everything in my power to see it they think of you as one of my spies! Or an agent for Discord! Or both!"

My heart fell into my stomach.

"I will not have my cause denied," Chrysalis declared. "I have waited too long and suffered too much at the hooves of these infernal alicorns. Yes, think, Candy Swirl. Think hard. Think about condemning my kind to a slow and lingering death if you don't give me that pendant. See if you truly believe that holds up against the so-called friendship the ponies have given you on the pretense that they believe you are one of them! Which you are not!"

I trembled hard. My throat closed up. I heard only my own ragged breath.

Chrysalis turned away and headed for the balcony doors. She paused and turned her head towards me. "You have a day to make your decision, Candy Swirl. I will inform you of the time and place. You can choose to give me the pendant, and let me set right for you what Discord set wrong ... or you can keep it, and remain in an alien world inhabiting an alien body -- and quite possibly in an alien dungeon -- for the rest of your life."

I held my breath as the doors glowed with her magic. Her guards fell into step flanking her as she left. My guards rushed to me. "Are you all right, Miss Swirl?"

No. I would never be all right. I stopped being all right when I was thirteen. "Yes, I'm fine," I lied in a quaking voice.

The guards exchanged a look but said nothing. I trotted numbly back to my room. They dutifully remained silent, and just as dutifully took up position on either side of my door as I stepped into my room.

I had no more strength left to think or feel. I crawled into bed and wept until sleep claimed me.

Chapter 13 - Rethinking

No.

I don't want to be here again!

The same street. The same grime and decay. The same gloomy, damp night. The same apartment building. The same useless endeavor. The same shit all over again!

My cell phone warbles. I yank it out and throw it as hard as I can. I cannot even gain the satisfaction of hearing it smash against the concrete, as it vanishes into the dream aether before--

My cell phone warbles.

What the fuck?! I just threw it away! Goddamn it! I pull it out again and hurtle it to the ground. This time I am well-rewarded for my effort as the screen shatters and the casing fractures. I stomp on it with my feet for good measure and kick the broken remnants. They skitter across the concrete and vanish into--

My cell phone warbles.

I pull it out again. "LEAVE ME ALONE!!" I scream at the phone's glowing screen. Yet all my emotion does nothing to wipe the text message glaring at me in mockery of my rage:

youhavetoseeyouhavetoseeYOUHAVETOSEE

See what?! What is this supposed to mean? I ... wait, this is from Michelle! I've been trying to reach her all day! She hasn't responded to texts or ...

... nononoNONO STOP IT STOP IT! I'm not doing this again. It means nothing. It's just more pain. I'm going to get rid of the pendant. I'm going to free myself of these nightmares.

The text message changes, and I nearly drop the phone in shock.

please dont give me away

"Wh-what?? This can't ... y-you don't have a say in this! You're just a stupid piece of jewelry! Why did I ever think you meant anything more than--!"

not until you seeseeseeseeseesee

Wait, this is from Michelle! I've been trying to ...

Dammit, NO! I ... shit ... FINE! We'll do this again! I'll fail again!

I run into the building ... up the stairs ... to the apartment. I'm ... here already? How did I get here that fast?

"Why are you doing this to me?!" Michelle wails from within, and I gasp and stagger. "I thought you were my friend!"

I hurtle myself at the door and smash it down. It's all the same! The drugs. The mess. My dying friend. The figure standing over ...

... over her ...

My eyes widen. Someone IS here! A woman. She turns around, and my heart nearly stops. I stagger backwards and thump against the closed door I had supposedly smashed to bits. I'm staring at ...

... me?!

No, how can that be?! This can't be what I saw! It has to be a delusion. I wasn't here, not until I broke through her door. And how could it close behind me? I ...

My vision blurs. I blink rapidly, and she's gone, like she was never there.

I'm on the street again. I don't wait to hear their footfalls. I turn to run, then recoil with a shrill shriek, falling backwards on my ass.

"I can make all this go away," says Queen Chrysalis as she stares down at me, a sly smile stretching across her muzzle.

"Wh-what?? But you ... how are you in my ...?!"

"I can take away your pain. You will never be plagued by this nightmare again. You will never (SEE) feel such utter failure every night."

I am too wrapped up in my own fear to notice the heavens opening as I scrabble backwards from this monstrosity.

Chrysalis laughs. "You are a fool to consider any other course! You have no way out, and no way forward, only a way back! Back where you started!"

"I can safely say," rises a voice from behind me. I look up and see Princess Luna step forward. "That I am quite tired of hearing from you any further."

A single bolt fired from her horn, and Queen Chrysalis dissolves into mist.

I stand. "She ... she was just ..."

"Just a figment of your dream, yes," says Luna.

"But you're not."

Luna smiles gently. "No, I am not."

"You're ... probably pretty confused about me."

"Indeed, I am. Perhaps not quite in the way you think, however." She pauses as she looks around. "The entity was here again, the one who is trying to help you."

"Who ... or what is it?"

"I am still uncertain." Luna turns to me. "You are the better one to find out."

I sigh and hang my head. "I don't want to find out. I just want this to stop."

Something very soft brushes against my chin, urging it up. Only when my eyes are level with hers do I realize it is the tip of one of her wings. "You are almost there. You saw part of what you have been prevented from seeing for so long. You need only to take the final step."

"But it made no sense!" I wail. "I saw me! What does that mean?"

Luna considers. "I could tell you what I think, but ... I fear that in your present state, you may not believe me, and it may unravel what you have already accomplished."

My eyes tear up. "I don't want to keep doing this."

"I am sorry. I can only chase away the phantoms, not hold memories or emotion at bay. Some things the dreamer must work out herself." Luna sighs. "Even if the answer is not what she wants to accept."

"Y-you're saying that ... that this j-just means I-I'm responsible for--"

Luna holds up a hoof. "No. Do not make conclusions yet. Wait."

I sigh. "That's all I ever seem to do."

Luna smiles. "Then you are already quite skilled at it. Now, I must leave you. It grows late." She pauses. "Then again ... some answers are best found when the night still reigns."

My eyes opened.

I groaned and rolled onto my front. I blinked the crud of too little sleep and dried tears from my eyes. I splayed my hooves and thwacked my head against the pillow, uttering a long sigh that echoed in the silence of the moon-splendored night.

I wanted to forget about that dream, but lack of returning slumber forced me to recall it. Ever since I had arrived, the winds of fate buffeted me wherever they pleased. Perhaps becoming a pegasus who had no idea how to use her wings would have been a more appropriate form.

I sighed and dropped off the bed with a resounding clop of hooves that reminded me of my predicament. For over a day, being a pony had simply happened, and now the changeling queen had thrust it back into my consciousness, like trying to sleep and suddenly becoming aware of my breathing.

I picked up a fore-hoof and stared at it. I tried to envision a hand, flexing the fingers in my mind. The imagery refused to come. Was my brain no longer wired for it except in the depths of dream? Would I have to adapt once more when I became human again? Or were my dreams a sign that this pony body was just a wrapper around the real me?

What the hell was the real me anymore?

I lowered the hoof. Despite how gently I set it down, I still heard its impact. I needed to leave this room, yet the skies through the window remained dark save for the scattering of stars and the pale glow of the moon.

Some answers are best found when the night still reigns.

I cast a heavy gaze at the dresser. The gold of the pendant gleamed as if in mockery of me. I forced myself to cross the room and put it back on. I clenched my teeth briefly at the sound of the clasp closing by itself. Why was it so eager to attach itself to me? Did it simply want to cause me pain?

I trotted to the door. I lifted a hoof to open it when muffled noises from the hall stopped me: a shuffle of armor, a clop of hooves, and conversation in indeterminate whispers. The hooves and talk receded into the distance, and it became silent once more.

I pushed open the door. My guards flanked the door on either side, as always. A different shift, of course, but still one pegasus and one unicorn. "Good morning, Miss Swirl," said the former.

"What time is it?" I asked.

"Almost dawn, Miss Swirl."

I had hoped for enough night remaining to visit the library. So much for Luna's words in my dream. I needed some air. Perhaps I could visit the balcony again, this time alone. I headed down the hall, and my guards followed. I sighed when I saw four guards posted outside the balcony doors. So much for that idea.

I started to trot past them, but two were those strange pegasi with bat-like wings. I turned my head towards them and froze when my eyes beheld who lay behind the transparent doors.

Princess Celestia and Princess Luna stood on the balcony, quietly conversing. I stared at them for one second too long, and Celestia turned her head towards me. I backed up a step and started to turn away. Celestia's horn glowed, and the doors burst open.

"Good morning, Candy Swirl," said Celestia with a soft smile. "Would you care to join us in welcoming the dawn?"

I swallowed hard. I failed to remember anything Rarity had taught me about dealing with royalty, yet I could not simply refuse. Only when I had stepped over the threshold did I realize with no small amount of horror that I had not taken a shower yet, and my mane was likely a mess.

Somehow, I remembered to bow.

"You are up rather early," said Celestia.

I rose to my hooves. A dozen responses flitted through my head, none of which were anything I wanted to admit. "Um ... yes, I am, Princess."

"Did you sleep well?" asked Luna.

So she still didn't know? It seemed impossible, but I would take advantage of it. "I slept okay, Princess. Thank you for asking."

Celestia turned to her sister. "After you, of course."

Luna smiled. "Of course." She turned towards the railing, and her horn glowed.

I stepped to the side so I could see the sky better. My heart thumped as the moon slid down. I could actually see it moving. I was watching a living being move a celestial body. She swept the stars from the skies next, the heavens surrendering the darkness to a gentle twilight glow.

Luna's horn still glowed. Only then did I notice a few stars still twinkling above where the moon had set -- had been made to set. My jaw dropped as the stars twirled about each other, darting out and then back, and finally diving for the horizon one by one.

"Cheeky," said Celestia with a smile.

"How often do I have an audience?" said Luna as the glow of her horn finally faded.

Had she done that little show for me? Was that just to be showy, or was it meant as a display of her power?

Celestia glanced at me before she turned towards the skies, a golden glow surrounding her horn. My heart raced as the skies brightened, and the brilliant orb of the sun glowed a deep orange as it peeked above the horizon.

I then understood what Queen Chrysalis was up against. She needed leverage against creatures with nothing less than divine power. Celestia and Luna had the power of life and death over this world. But how could they not raise the sun every morning? Unless they had a means of controlling where it cast its light, they could not punish their own subjects just to make a point to some other creatures in the world.

Despite their apparent benevolence, this amount of power frightened me. Gods and goddesses did not manifest in such undeniable ways back on Earth. Here, they formed the very reality of Equestria itself. They had become an integral part of how it worked. Yet the ponies did not worship them, nor did these alicorns appear to demand it.

How did Chrysalis expect a single magical artifact to act as leverage over beings of such power? Would they be swayed by its mere uniqueness or monetary value? She had said she would exploit Twilight's weakness for such things. Did she intend to pit her against these two? That seemed rather unlikely, unless it was all no more than a political game.

The sun rose fully, its light now slowly edging towards yellow, and I turned my eyes away when it became blinding. Celestia turned from the railing, her horn quiescent.

"I still admire your delicate touch, dear sister," said Luna.

Celestia smiled. "Thank you." She turned to me. "So what are your plans for today, Candy Swirl?"

"Um ... I actually don't know, Princess," I said. "I assume Rarity and Fluttershy will stop by sometime this morning."

After all, that was their obligation, wasn't it?

"You might be interested in knowing that Twilight has some leads as to the origins of your pendant," said Celestia.

My conversation with Chrysalis had led me to the inescapable conclusion that this pendant had indeed originated in Equestria. It should have made the decision that much easier. If it had originated here, then I would be returning it to its rightful place of origin. Why should I care what they did with it? What difference did it make to me who controlled it? I did wonder how it got to Earth, but that was the least of my concerns.

"Will she want to examine it further, Princess?" I asked.

"That is up to her, but she may at least wish to ask you more questions about it."

"While she realizes you do not remember all the details of your past," said Luna. "It is hoped she may mention something that will spark your memory."

I wished I could take what Luna said at face value and not scrutinize it for a hidden meaning. She had seen Chrysalis in my dreams. Had she not made the connection? Or was the changeling queen a common vision in pony nightmares?

But that meant Chrysalis had done something truly evil to become a common nightmare. Or had the ruling monarch -- diarch -- made her out to be a nightmare? The victor writes the history books, after all. Banishing an entire race to a land where they had little chance to obtain nourishment filled me with a sense of unease. Chrysalis' anger seemed justified in light of that.

Luna looked at me expectantly. "I'll do my best to answer any questions she has for me, Princess," I said. "I'm just not sure how much it matters."

"Oh?"

Dammit, why did I have to say that? "I don't know magic. I mean, I don't know advanced magic. Like the kind of magic that created the pendant."

"If anypony can determine the origin and purpose of your pendant," said Celestia. "It would be Twilight Sparkle."

My mind spun as this conversation collided with the memory of Chrysalis' vitriol. I could almost hear her. "She used to be your student, wasn't she?"

Celestia smiled. "Indeed she was. My best student, in fact."

Yet she could not break the binding magic on my pendant? What of Celestia? She was akin to a goddess, she could move the damn sun, and yet she had not offered to do what Twilight could not. Was it beneath her? Or was the help being withheld?

Or was it beyond even their power?

Chrysalis had said she had come to beg for their indulgence. Had I been expected to do the same? I had the pendant, the same leverage Chrysalis desired, but no means to exercise it. My needs were modest compared to hers.

Was what I wanted out of this so bad?

"I'm sure she was very good," I said in a listless voice.

"Well, most of the time," said Luna with a sly smile. "Dear sister, you did tell me of the day she had accidentally set fire to your throne."

"Wait, that actually happened??" I blurted.

Celestia giggled. Actually giggled. "Oh, my! Poor Twilight was so embarrassed!" She turned to me. "Spike told you, no doubt."

I simply nodded.

"Twilight never would, of course."

"I do hope you solicited an appropriate bribe from Spike for your continued silence," Luna said.

"Now now, Luna," said Celestia. "Don't encourage bad behavior in the young."

"Daffodils," I said. "He, um ... got me extra daffodils with my lunch."

"Too late, Tia," Luna said.

Celestia laughed.

"It was actually his idea, Princess," I said, smiling faintly.

"Spike can always be counted on to have his heart in the right place," said Celestia.

"Yes, he's ... he's nice," I said softly.

My conversation with him over lunch had been some of the most stress-free moments since coming to Equestria. Even when he had tried to engage me in topics that were likely common knowledge but left me clueless, he had accepted either my silence or acknowledging nods and moved on. Spike had imposed no expectations on me.

Celestia and Luna exchanged a smile. I found I was smiling, too, despite the tumult in my mind and heart.

"I should allow you to prepare yourself for the day," said Celestia.

"Oh, um, yes," I said. "I-I'm sorry, I'm a bit of a mess."

"No worries, Candy Swirl. You should see my mane in the morning before I have brushed it."

"I have," Luna said. "It is the stuff of nightmares, indeed."

I placed a hoof over my mouth but giggled anyway. "I, um, better get to that. Thank you, Princess Celestia, Princess Luna." I turned and started off the balcony. I stopped at the threshold and bowed before heading down the corridor to my room.

As stiff and stilted as my audience with them had been at dinner the day before, I could have wished for something as informal and ... lighthearted ... as what had just transpired. Yet why did my heart still race?

No, I knew the answer. Despite how the diarchs conversed with such friendly aplomb, it served as window dressing to their display of power, whether intentional or not. What scared me more, siding with Chrysalis and facing the diarchs' wrath, or being discovered as an alien and meeting the same? Which fate was worse? Where did the diarchs' benevolence end?

Why did I insist on assuming it had an arbitrary limit?

My mind ran in circles. I needed more time to think.

Preparing for my shower seemed to take forever. The braid resisted my clumsy efforts to be undone using my uncoordinated hooves and a brush. I muddled through it; learning this skill seemed a moot point if I might have short hair and hands again.

I finally got my shower done, and my hair sorted out. The braid had imparted a lingering gentle wave to my mane, so I guess it still looked nice. I doubted I would have a chance to go to the spa again before I left Equestria, so this would have to do.

Too bad. I actually liked that spa.

I wore the pendant, an action now no more than simple reflex, like getting dressed when I was a human.

Please don't give me away. Had I really seen that? Had it really come from the pendant? The pendant was a thing, an object. It took up space and nothing more. My own head had insisted on playing stupid tricks to further complicate a matter that ought to be simple.

Like seeing myself in Michelle's apartment. What did that mean? That certainly could not have been real. How could I have seen myself? Unless ...

Unless it had been a changeling. A changeling could look just like me if it wished. It could have taken my form, pretended to be me when it visited Michelle, and ...

~~~

... erupts in sickly green light which strikes my eyes. My already tortured mind offers little resistance, almost welcoming the merciful stupor into which it falls ...

~~~

... and yet ...

... yet that idea sounded fantastic even still. Didn't it make more sense to believe I saw an embodiment of my guilt? Had I got there in time, everything would have been different. Luna's words confused me. What could I possibly have been prevented from seeing other than a full acceptance of my complicity in Michelle's death?

I winced and rubbed the side of my head as a dull ache suddenly flared through my skull. Where did that come from? Disrupted sleep rarely gave me a headache. Fortunately, the pain abated fairly quickly.

I headed out of my room and said to the guards, "Please lead me to the dining hall."

"Of course, Miss Swirl."

When I entered the dining hall, I found five places set, but no food had been put out. Twilight sat at the table alone. She looked up and flinched slightly. "Oh, um, good morning, Candy. I thought you were going to wait for Rarity to pick you up from your room."

I hesitated as Chrysalis' words spun through my head. Perhaps I had wanted to ease Rarity's obligation to me. "I figured I'd save her the trouble," I said in a flat voice as I sat down.

Twilight smiled slightly. It seemed a bit forced. "Of course. Breakfast is a little delayed anyway. Spike had something to do at the last minute before he could prepare the meal."

I nodded. I had no idea what to say. I weighed and measured every word in my head for its impact on my potential plans. God, that sounded like I was some evil overlord's minion plotting the overthrow of a kingdom, not some sixteen year old girl who simply wanted to get herself out from under something too big for her to understand.

"Candy, do you know your plans for this morning?" Twilight asked.

"No, not at all."

"Would you consent to having me examine your pendant further?"

I tensed, but I harbored no desire to lift my hoof to my pendant. "Why?"

"I want to take some more readings. I've been trying to determine when and where Starswirl the Bearded may have created it. I've formulated a theory, and I want to see if the pendant will help confirm or deny it."

I nodded slowly. "What's your theory, if you don't mind me asking?"

Twilight's smile widened. "Well, some details are a little sensitive, but what I can tell you is that he created this pendant during one of several periods in his life where he left no record of his actions or travels. I believe he had created a secret lab in a remote area for the purpose of testing powerful or dangerous magicks. I want to locate that lab where I believe he created your pendant. I have a hypothesis, and some further examination of your pendant may confirm it."

"So where do you think this lab may be?" I asked. "Or is that sensitive information?"

"For now, yes."

Of course. Like Chrysalis had said, she's royalty. She can decide to whom she reveals critical information and how much.

Or was this all a ploy to get the pendant from me? Had she realized her mistake and planned to break the binding magic herself? That would relieve me of this decision, but also of any remaining leverage I had against being tossed in a dungeon once they discovered my origin.

"Maybe we should do it a little later," I said, my voice quavering slightly.

"Oh," said Twilight, crestfallen. "Um ... okay, sure."

A moment later, I heard approaching hooves from the hall. "Ah, there you are, Candy," said Rarity as she entered. "I had gone to your room, but you had already left."

She smiled at me. I smiled faintly in return, not completely forced. I still held dear the memory of our time together the morning before. I needed something pleasant to remember this world by if ...

... when I left.

"Are you all right, Candy?" Rarity asked, looking at me with concern.

"Oh, um, sorry," I said. "Just a little distracted this morning."

"Perfectly understandable," she said as she took a seat next to me. "This summit has us all a little on edge."

"Is Fluttershy coming?" I asked.

"Ah, she's a bit nervous about Queen Chrysalis' presence."

"Chrysalis is not going to be at breakfast," said Twilight. "It would've been safe for her."

"But you know how she is sometimes. She will meet us outside when we are ready to head into town."

"So you're taking Candy to Ponyville again?" Twilight said.

Rarity smiled. "Do I sense a bit of distress in your voice? Envious, perhaps?"

"Well ..." Twilight's gaze shifted to me for a moment. "I had hoped to take some time to examine the pendant again, but--"

My eyes widened. I had already refused!

Rarity waved a hoof. "Really, darling, you should keep your focus on the summit. Worry about Candy's pendant another day."

Twilight looked unhappy at that rebuke. Maybe Rarity was still on my side after all.

Was I being too harsh? Yet how could I not regard everything in a new light after what Chrysalis had told me? Twilight would not meet my eyes. Had the guards told her of my meeting with Chrysalis? If so, why had I not been called out on it?

"I'm understandably anxious to solve the mystery behind that pendant," said Twilight after another furtive glance at me. "Especially in light of that attempt by the changeling to get into the castle."

"But you thwarted that admirably. And easily."

"I just wish we had caught that changeling."

"Still no leads?" Rarity asked.

Twilight sighed. "None. Strong Wing had taken off after the changeling when I revealed her Bon Bon disguise, but he was hit with a stun spell at the edge of the forest and had to break off."

"Strong Wing?"

"One of the guards on duty at the castle entrance that morning," said Twilight.

"I would say if there have been no further attempts to breach the castle, you have more than proven your defenses are a match for them. Especially now with Shining Armor's shield in place."

Twilight did not look mollified, but she remained silent.

Rarity turned to me. "So, for this morning, Candy, I would like us to head over to my boutique again. You seemed so interested in my work, I thought I would catch up on a bit of my backlog and not worry about you being bored."

"That sounds fine," I said.

"But we do need to stop off at Town Hall briefly. I need to, ah, check on an application I submitted."

"Application?"

"Well, the details would bore you, trust me, and it won't take but a moment."

Rarity continued the illusion she had no desire to foster me. By Chrysalis' reckoning, an illusion was all it had been. Keep me in ignorance, then. It was one less thing to hold me to this world.

Chapter 14 - Hurt

"So what do you have planned for today, Candy?"

I barely registered Spike's voice, even when he had addressed me directly, until Rarity gently nudged me. I looked up from my barely half-finished breakfast and cast my gaze on the smiling young dragon. "Oh, um, I was going to spend at least part of the day at the boutique. After that, I don't know."

Rarity smiled. "I thought perhaps we would top off the morning with lunch at that new café which opened recently. They've already received rave reviews from the more upper crust of Ponyville society. Afterward, we would return to the boutique until it's time to pick up Sweetie Belle from school."

Spike's eyes widened. "You're gonna spend the entire day away from the castle?"

He reflected a bit of my own alarm, but likely for entirely different reasons. Chrysalis had said she would name the time and place when I had to give her the pendant (if I gave it to her), and I assumed I had to be in the castle for that.

"Well, why not, darling?" said Rarity. "I'm sure Candy is not interested in some stuffy summit meeting."

"There is the little matter of studying her pendant," Twilight said in a low voice.

I debated seizing on that as a means of returning to the castle earlier, but that meant opening the door to my other fears.

I glanced towards the end of the table. Princess Celestia had joined us for breakfast. She and Spike had arrived together, the latter scurrying off into the kitchen to prepare the meal. She had initially engaged us in conversation -- well, I mostly listened and made myself as unobtrusive as possible -- but she had since fallen silent, sedately eating her meal, utensils held in the golden glow of her horn. Her eyes were downcast, as if she were lost in thought.

"Yeah, there's that!" Spike said. "And ... um ... well, I did like having lunch with her. I wouldn't mind doing it again."

That ... had been unexpected. He must have sensed my surprise in the look I gave him, as he blushed faintly.

Rarity gave Spike a half-lidded look. "Oh? Do I have some competition for my Spike-Wikey's affections?"

I nearly choked on my bite of apple. I heard a faint giggle from the end of the table. Celestia had not looked up, but a small smile graced her muzzle.

Spike's blush deepened. "I didn't mean that! I just ... um ... I dunno, maybe Candy wanted more daffodils? Not that I'm trying to bribe her aga ... I mean, I never bribed her before! Not that this is a bribe, either! Nope!"

Both Twilight and Rarity stared at him. My sides hurt from suppressed laughter.

"Um ... wh-what I mean is ... I thought ... Candy never got a proper tour of the castle."

"Spike, we're trying to hold a summit," Twilight said. "Maybe this should wait until it's over?"

"But by then Candy will be fostered to--"

Twilight jabbed a hoof into his side.

"Ack! I mean, well, the summit doesn't start until three, right?"

"Spike is correct," Celestia finally spoke. "I wanted Luna to get at least some sleep."

Sleep? I guess it made sense that Luna was nocturnal.

"So why not have her come back here for lunch?" Spike said. "Then she can do your thing with the pendant, I can take her to the, er, I mean, take her on the tour, and we're all good!" He paused, his eyes shifting from side to side. "Um, right?"

Seriously, what was up with Spike? Good God, I hope he didn't really have some sort of crush on me! That was the last thing I needed.

Wait.

He had almost spilled something again, hadn't he? Spike may be a great assistant to Twilight, but a master of subtlety he was not. He wanted me to be somewhere that afternoon. Had Chrysalis gone through him? Was that when I was supposed to make my decision regarding the pendant? That really did not seem at all like something Spike would do.

I had to admit, Spike had managed to make me like him without really trying. I would not mind spending more time with him.

"Candy, it really is up to you what you wish to do with your day," said Rarity. "I certainly will not force you. And the café will always be there."

"I want to head back to the castle for lunch," I said. "And the tour."

Spike smiled and gave me a thumb's up gesture.

"And you'll let me examine the pendant?" Twilight said hopefully.

"We'll see," I said in a low voice.

Twilight sighed but said nothing in protest. Rarity glanced between Twilight and I, but also remained silent.

Yeah, whatever was going to happen, it was going to be on my terms, ponies.

Fluttershy awaited us just outside the castle. She gave me a warm smile. I had trouble returning it, but I managed.

If I asked Fluttershy why she was friends with Discord, would the answer make any sense? Would I even accept it if it did? I remembered what I had promised I would do if I ever met Discord again. For awhile, I believed I could temper that response. He had saved my life, after all. Finding out the pendant itself had set the chain of events in motion changed everything. The pendant had originated in Equestria. Equestria was responsible for me being in Equestria. Wasn't that what it really came down to?

"Candy?" came Fluttershy's tentative voice as we trotted into town, my guards closely bringing up the rear.

I turned my head towards her. "Huh?"

"Are you okay?"

"Uh, yeah, I'm fine," I replied in a more curt voice than intended. "Why?"

"You just seem kind of quiet this morning."

"I do admit, you do seem a little out of sorts today," said Rarity. "Is there something you need to talk to us about?"

I glanced between them. They both had hopeful looks on their faces. Were they expecting me to say something specific? Was Chrysalis right about them already knowing what I was, and all they needed was for me to confirm it?

"I ... um ... n-no, nothing." I sighed. "Sorry, I had some trouble sleeping last night."

"Goodness, I'm sorry about that," said Fluttershy.

"The essences from the spa not working for you then?" asked Rarity.

I could have face-hoofed. I had forgotten all about them. They still sat unopened in the vanity back in my room. God, I had been so out of it. "Um, no, not really."

"I do hope this summit does not take too long," said Rarity. "We will all be better off when it's done."

For once, I could agree. Maybe I would be gone before it concluded, if the outcome really mattered that little to me.

A round building rose within a circular clearing near the center of town, just over a bridge which crossed a small stream, and Rarity guided us towards it. It looked impressive and central enough to be the Town Hall. I was ready to follow her in when Rarity turned to face me. "Ah, if you didn't mind waiting out here with Fluttershy, Candy, I will only be a minute."

"Oh, um, sure," I said.

Rarity smiled and trotted inside.

I glanced at Fluttershy. She still had a troubled look in her eyes, yet I had to give voice to my earlier thoughts. "Fluttershy, I wanted to ask you about Discord."

Her pupils shrank a bit. "Oh, um, what about him?"

"You're supposed to be reforming him, right?"

"Yes, that's right."

"How?"

Fluttershy blinked. "How?"

"Yes, how?" I knew I risked revealing my ignorance about facts that might be widely known, and that perhaps had prompted Fluttershy's uneasy look. Of course, it had nothing to do with my accusing tone of voice.

"I'm trying to show him how important friendship is," said Fluttershy.

I waited. "Uh ... that's it?"

"Well, maybe that's over-simplifying a bit. It's through friendship that he learns to use his powers for good."

I had the urge to ask her to define what "good" meant in this context, but I refrained. "Does he tell you everything he does when you're not around?"

"Not always."

"Does he at least explain why he does ... what he does?"

Fluttershy hesitated and averted her gaze, scraping a fore-hoof. "Um, he can be a little evasive sometimes."

"So how do you really know he's serious? How do you know he's not just pretending to--"

I flinched when she snapped her gaze back to mine. "Discord sometimes makes mistakes. He doesn't always get it right. He's new to friendship. He's dealing with completely new feelings, new motivations, and a new world view. That's hard. He's trying to fit into a place he never was before and not be forced to give up who he is."

I stood in shocked silence, her eyes locked to mine. I had never heard Fluttershy speak with such passion before, even if still in her soft, gentle voice.

New feelings. New motivations. New world view. Trying to fit in and not lose who I am. Yeah, I wouldn't know anything about that, would I?

Wait, no. It wasn't entirely the same. It was not a fair comparison at all. I didn't have the ability to affect the destinies of others. I didn't snatch people from other universes. What could possibly motivate somepony like Fluttershy to do that for a creature of such power and such whimsy unless she were like Chrysalis had said, either beguiled or gullible? Nopony was that kind.

We both jumped when a voice suddenly roared from inside Town Hall, "A WHAT has been filed against it?!"

My eyes widened. I swore the ground actually shook. "Was that ... was that Rarity??"

"Kindly allow me the courtesy to decide where the fault lies!" Rarity's voice thundered forth, making several nearby ponies turn their heads. "Now what are the reasons for this inane challenge?!"

"Oh, dear," Fluttershy murmured.

"That is patently absurd! I filed all the proper papers!"

"What the hay?!" came a raspy voice from above. Rainbow Dash flew down and hovered nearby. "You can hear her halfway to Cloudsdale!"

This could not possibly be about my ...

"She is a FILLY, not the spawn of Tirek!"

Fluttershy whimpered and hid her face behind her hair.

"Oo, what's going on?" said Pinkie Pie as she bounced over.

"ENOUGH! I demand to know who is responsible for this!"

Pinkie pouted. "Aww, Rarity is ripping somepony else a new one, and I wasn't invited! Again!"

"Ugh, that INSUFFERABLE mare!" Rarity boomed. "It is little wonder Sweetie Belle complains about that mare's daughter to no end! Fine. Let her have her petty little challenge. I've stared down greater beasts than her in my day, and the only thing she has that's more impressive than them is her BIG MOUTH! GOOD DAY!!"

"Tarnation!" came Applejack's voice as she trotted over, a set of saddlebags over her barrel. "What the hay is Rarity goin' on about?"

"That's what I wanted to know!" Rainbow said.

"Take cover!" Pinkie cried, who was now wearing a pith helmet. "She's coming out!"

I very nearly expected to see Rarity transformed into some sort of wild-eyed monster, yet out trotted the same dignified mare with the always well-coiffed mane, a serene smile on her face. She stopped short when she saw everypony staring at her and blushed faintly. "Oh, dear. I do hope I didn't make too much of a scene."

"I-is everything okay?" Fluttershy said in a tentative voice.

"Ah, well," Rarity began as she trotted forward. "Merely a minor bureaucratic delay on a certain legal proceeding. Nothing to fret about."

So it was about my being fostered. Somepony had raised a stink about it, and Rarity ...

Well ...

A duty, right? Just a duty? She was just ... really adamant about it. My mother could be that way about business deals she absolutely wanted. This had to be no different, right? Nopony was that generous.

Applejack raised an eyebrow. "You sure 'bout that, sugarcube?"

Rarity uttered an exasperated sigh. "Really, Applejack, I have this under control. I simply need to make a few, ah, discreet inquiries to see if I can get around that insuff ... er ... concerned citizen's challenge."

"Let me know if you need me to, you know, lean on anypony," said Rainbow.

"Absolutely not, Rainbow! You should be ashamed for even thinking that."

"Oo, I'll lean on them, too!" Pinkie said.

Rarity gasped. "You, Pinkie? Resort to such ... ruffian tactics?"

"Huh? I meant I'd lean on them until they fell over, then tickle them silly until they gave in!" Pinkie said with a smile. "That's what you were thinking, right, Dashie?"

Rainbow face-hoofed.

"Enough," said Rarity as she joined Fluttershy and I. "I have this well in hoof. Now, we should have been at the boutique fifteen minutes ago. Let's go."

The sense of familiarity instilled merely by the distinctive aroma of fabric foiled my hopes of maintaining any sort of emotional distance. Smells, sights, and sounds conspired to force a sense of comfort with my surroundings while I stood in the back room of the Carousel Boutique. For once, enhanced equine senses were more a bane than a blessing.

Equine. I had to keep that at the forefront of my mind. I still inhabited a body contrary to my birthright. Whatever sense of comfort or familiarity had accumulated in the past few days could not change that. I remained a stranger in a strange land, furthermore in a strange body.

Like Chrysalis had hammered home, I was not one of them.

I watched Rarity work. Her aplomb with magic sparked the same sense of wonder, even if the same smile failed to cross my muzzle as it had the day before. I viewed everything through a new critical lens. Scissors cut perfect lines and shapes, thread speared the eyelet of the needle on the first go, needle flowed through fabric like a fish through water, but I fought not to envy skills that I would never have before my time in Equestria was done.

I watched a dress come to life, as elegant as any my mother might have produced. When my mother still made dresses by hand, my youth limited my appreciation to simply noting the pretty colors. In a single day with Rarity I had attained a far greater appreciation and sheer want for what my mother could do.

Did.

Had done.

How many times had I slipped up in tense when talking about my mother? Or Michelle? How often had I talked about them as if I had just seen them last week? My head still insisted in living in a past world that no longer existed. For a brief time, I believed Equestria to be the solution, but it was really just a bigger part of the problem.

Equestria was my past, thanks to the pendant. And if I wanted to get away from my past, I had to get away from this world as well.

"Candy?"

I blinked. "Huh?"

Rarity had stopped her work. Nothing floated in the air like it might were this a simple pause to ask me a brief question. Her eyes regarded me with sad concern. "Are you quite sure you have nothing you want to talk to me about?"

I clenched my teeth. I wished she had left me alone. Yes, I had plenty to talk about. Whether I should was the real question.

"Candy, are you angry with me about something?" Rarity asked.

I didn't have an answer for her. So I asked her something instead. "Rarity, are you intending to foster me?"

Rarity's pupils shrank slightly, perhaps not shocked, but surprised. She gave me a weak smile. "I suppose there's no point in keeping it from you any further," she said in a soft voice. "I was intending for it to be a surprise once the summit was over. Yes, I am."

"Why?"

Rarity hesitated. "I'm sorry?"

"It's a simple question," I said in a tense voice. "Why do you want to foster me?"

She hesitated again. A knot formed in the pit of my stomach. Would she tell me the truth? That some magical map summoned her? That it was her duty? I might even appreciate her honesty; it would make the break with her -- and Equestria -- easier.

"I don't have a simple answer for you, Candy," said Rarity.

Of course. Nothing was simple. "Do you have any answer for me?" I demanded.

Rarity's horn glowed briefly as she levitated the spectacles from her muzzle and set them aside. "The reason I was prompted to start the process is not the same as the reason I continued the process."

Prompted to start the process. I had been right. Chrysalis had been right.

"I strongly feel the second reason is more important than the first," Rarity said.

Part of me screamed she was wrong, that the difference made her gesture completely worthless. I quelled it for the time being. "G-go on," I said in a small voice.

"The second reason is ... I care for you, Candy."

"You don't even know who I really am!" I yelled. "How can you say that?!"

"Maybe I know you more than you think."

My heart thumped. "Are you saying ... y-you know about my real past?"

"No."

Fear demanded I call her a liar. I suppressed it through sheer force of will and remained silent.

"I'm saying it doesn't matter. What matters is who I see now. And the pony I see now is one I want to have a chance to flourish, to grow, to become a beautiful mare in spirit as well as body, a chance you won't get if you're left alone."

I swallowed hard. "Y-you're not my mother," I breathed.

"No, I'm not," said Rarity in a subdued voice. "And it would be unconscionably presumptuous of me to ever expect to replace her. I would not even expect you to call me by that term of endearment, nor would I ever insist on it. I did not foal you, therefore I did not earn it."

My throat closed up. It wasn't supposed to go this way.

Rarity took a step towards me. "Candy ... I'd like to think we ... we connected, at least a little. Maybe I assumed too much. I sometimes do that. Please tell me if this is so."

I forced myself to take a breath. I could tell her that we failed to connect, but then I would be the liar. Lying had all but exhausted me. "No, Rarity, we did. I really did enjoy my time with you yesterday."

"But I'm still sensing something is wrong."

Everything was wrong! Why couldn't she see that?!

"Candy, please tell me the truth," said Rarity in a pained voice. "Do you want me to foster you?"

Stop asking me questions I didn't want to answer!

"What difference does that make?" I snapped. "Somepony obviously doesn't!"

"What are you ... oh ... the Town Hall."

"Yes, the Town Hall!" I said in a mocking voice. "What about that?"

"When I said I had that well in hoof, I meant it," Rarity said in a firm voice. "You need not worry about it."

"But it means somepony doesn't want me here!"

"Their opinion doesn't matter, not to me."

"But I don't want to cause--"

"Stop right there!" Rarity said, holding up a hoof.

I fell silent, more out of shock at her forcefulness than anything else.

"If this incident with the delay in my application is the only reason you wish to reject me as a fosterer, you are worrying yourself over nothing. I had told you that I tended not to claim special privilege for being an Element-bearer, but if it means overcoming this hurdle, I will claim it! And Twilight is a Princess of Equestria. She used her authority to take temporary custody of you, and she will use her authority again to help me if it is needed."

I swallowed hard and trembled.

Rarity's eyes glistened, and she said in a softer voice, "But if there is some other reason you don't want me, please ... say it. Don't give me false hope."

I stared, my mouth slightly agape.

False hope ...

She made it sound like she really ...

Goddammit.

I didn't care what the real reasons were behind the legal challenge. It was my way out. The easy way. The way that let me avoid a real decision. I didn't have to hurt anypony. The blame would be on somepony else.

What if I had given the pendant to Chrysalis the night before? Would I have been on Earth and back in my human body already? Would this all have been just a memory? But, no, I had been the coward. Again. "Not yet" was not a decision, just a delay. "I need to think" I had said, except I never do.

Desperation compelled me to lump Rarity in with the rest. Far easier to label a group than deal with individuals. Yet the idea burned an ache into my heart I could not ignore.

I wanted to answer so I didn't have to lie or hurt her in any way. I thought I had accomplished that when I finally replied in a very soft voice, "Not one you would find valid, anyway."

Rarity contemplated me for a moment, her eyes glistening. She finally nodded slowly. "Would you do me a f-favor, Candy?" she said with a small, trembling smile. "Can you relieve Fluttershy of minding the store for a short while and send her back here? I, um, have an alteration of a dress of hers that I need to discuss."

"Oh, um, sure," I said.

"Just tell any new customers that I will be out sh-shortly."

She had furnished an excuse for me to step away and let my emotions settle, or so it had appeared. If I had heard the catch in her voice, it had not registered. Or more likely, as I tended to do, I didn't want to hear it.

I reported to the front of the store and informed Fluttershy of Rarity's request. She looked a bit confused, but gave me a subdued look and headed back. I took a deep breath. I felt I had handled that the best I could. I had not had an emotional breakdown, and I gave Rarity an answer that seemed to satisfy her without having to outright lie.

Leaves rustled softly in a nearby tree through an open window. My steps clopped crisply against the floor behind the counter as I paced. My mother used to say that if you could hear your own footsteps in a store, the store was not busy enough. I wondered if that translated to hooves as well.

A pegasus mare entered the store. One of my guards followed her in and took up position near the door. "Rarity will be out shortly," I said. She nodded and proceeded to browse through the designs on display. An earth mare arrived next, and I repeated the mantra. She simply paced slowly about.

Imagery flashing before my mind's eye threatened to overcome reality, where my twelve year old self stood behind the counter of one of my mother's stores. My mother had asked me if I could see myself working in a place like this. I never really gave her a firm answer, as uncertain as my still childlike outlook had been.

The same question now filled me with a sense of longing.

Finally, I heard hooves behind me. "Ah, thank you, Candy," came Rarity's voice, now more steady.

I turned and froze, my reply lost. Her eyes glistened, and her mascara had run a bit, a tiny amount that might go unnoticed on another pony, but for Rarity ...

"Candy, it's getting late in the morning, and I appear to be getting busy," she said in a neutral voice, but it quavered slightly. "Fluttershy is willing to take you to the castle if you wish to return. That will give you time to freshen up before lunch."

"Um, okay," I said. "Rarity, are you ...?"

Before I could complete the question, she turned away and trotted over to a customer. Her lips quivered a few times before finally supporting a proper smile.

I stared, dumbstruck.

"Candy?" Fluttershy prompted.

I turned my head. She gave me a sad look. "Um, did something just--?"

"I think we better leave," Fluttershy said softly.

"But--"

"Please," she said in a low, urgent voice.

I swallowed hard and nodded. I trotted out the door and struggled not to glance backwards in a silent, belated bid for forgiveness that I likely did not deserve.

Chapter 15 - Last Chances

My hooves dragged as I trotted back to the castle, and my head remained bowed, as if Fluttershy's silence weighed me down. The quiet finally became too oppressive to ignore, my stomach too twisted by the words which had fought to escape my lips since we had left the boutique. "I didn't mean to hurt her."

"I know."

I swallowed hard, and pain flared briefly from the dryness of my throat. Fluttershy had not hesitated in her response. Perfunctory or sincere? I couldn't tell. No matter what she had said, the sadness in her voice conveyed far more. "I don't hate her or anything like that."

"I know."

I clenched my teeth against the urge to rage at her. Could she not offer some other insight? Why was I even bothering, given what Chrysalis had said about her? Every action I took only reinforced the changeling queen's accusation: I was not one of them, and I did not belong. "I don't want to hurt anypony."

"I know that, too."

I stopped and demanded, "How do you know that?"

Fluttershy turned towards me. "I'm sorry?"

"You keep saying 'I know' to everything I've said! How do you know?"

"It's just something I sense in you. I know you'd never intentionally hurt anypony."

So maybe that was the answer: Fluttershy was indeed gullible.

Why did I think that? Did acceptance of Chrysalis' words have to come at the expense of hurting others? All I wanted to do was escape to a better place, even if I were no longer sure how to define that. Escape to where? Home? I had initially escaped from there. Would shedding a piece of jewelry really mean a better life back there?

Was it so bad to want to remove myself from a world that had never been intended for me, and to return something that really never belonged to me? Wouldn't that just fix things by putting them back the way they were? Once I was gone, these ponies would move on. I would move on.

"Candy?"

God, that voice and its simple and innocent concern. She might as well have been Michelle in pony form. All my attempts to deny the resemblance had crumbled to dust. "I'm fine," I said, averting my eyes.

"No, you're not."

I trembled. "You ... you really have no idea, Fluttershy. Seriously, you don't."

"Then tell me."

I let out a ragged breath. "I'm not a monster."

Fluttershy uttered a tiny gasp. "Candy, I--"

"I'm not. I just feel like sometimes I-I'm acting like one because I have to fix something that's terribly broken, and I don't know any other way to do it. And you have no idea what that feels like."

"Yes, I do."

My gaze snapped back to hers, and my mouth opened to deliver a retort. The words died before reaching my lips when I looked into her earnest and glistening eyes.

"I really do," Fluttershy said with a small sigh. "I hurt ponies who were my friends. I didn't think I deserved them anymore after that. I even tried to lock myself away from them."

My heart thumped.

"But that wasn't the answer. Locking yourself away is never the answer. Despite how I hurt them, they still cared for me and helped me realize this."

"A-and they forgave you?" I said in a tiny voice.

"Yes. But more importantly, I forgave myself."

I squeezed my eyes shut.

"Candy, we all make mistakes," said Fluttershy. "Maybe that sounds trite, but it's true. I felt so bad when I hurt my friends. I was supposed to be an Element-bearer. I was supposed to be above such things. But it doesn't work that way."

I had no reply. Conflicting emotions spun like whirlwinds in my head. Chrysalis' words, Fluttershy's words ... what was true anymore?

I felt her wrap a foreleg around me. "Candy, I won't force you to reveal what's behind your pain. Just ... please promise me you won't lock yourself away from everypony else."

That was a promise I could not make, but I made it anyway. I nodded and said in a barely audible, quavering voice, "I p-promise."

Fluttershy pulled me into a hug, and for once I let myself believe that maybe I deserved it.

I rushed off to my room upon returning to the castle long enough to shed a few of the tears I had repressed in Fluttershy's presence. Even then, my emotions still ran on a ragged edge, raw and hurting like a wound that refused to close. Yet I had no time or energy for such sentiment. I had to get through the rest of the day and somehow keep my head screwed on straight. The morning had forced upon me one clear thought, however: maybe Chrysalis had been wrong about a few things.

I sat on my haunches on the bed. Aching body and heart compelled me to lean forward and rest my head on my folded fore-legs. I closed my eyes not to nap but to recapture that moment of clarity by replaying the meeting with Chrysalis before my mind's eye.

She had called me a scared little not-pony. Had I been too emotionally overwrought to think logically? Had I let her words sway me too easily? Yet even viewed in light of the burning memory of Rarity's tears, they still enticed me. Maybe I needed to take a step back.

My eyes snapped open at the sound of a knock at the door.

"Miss Swirl?" said a male voice from the hall. "May I speak with you for a moment?"

I raised my head. The voice sounded like it could be one of my guards. I trotted to the door and opened it, revealing an armored pegasus. He smiled and said, "Good day, Miss Swirl. Do you recognize me?"

He did look familiar, but I was unsure enough that I shook my head.

"My name is Strong Wing. I am one of the guards who was assigned to Queen Chrysalis last night when you met her on the balcony."

"Oh, um, yes, I think I remember," I said. Vaguely, anyway. Neither of her guards had spoken during that incident. However, I did remember the name. Twilight had mentioned him at breakfast. Something about chasing down the changeling that had tried to get into the castle.

"I would like to speak with you for a few moments, if that's okay?" asked Strong Wing.

I glanced past him and saw my own guards standing vigil as they always did, taking no exception to this pegasus' presence. "Um, sure, I guess so."

"May I come in?"

I nodded and stood aside. He stepped into the room, and I closed the door behind him. "Is something wrong?"

"Well, Miss Swirl, I wanted to apologize."

"Er ... come again?"

"For last night. For allowing Queen Chrysalis to upset you."

"Oh, um ..."

"Even though neither myself nor my fellow guards could hear what was being said, it was clear you were upset. Perhaps we should have been more adamant in our objections to leaving you alone with her."

In retrospect, I was surprised they had acquiesced to my request. Maybe it would have been better had they not. Either way, it was hardly his fault. I didn't need yet another pony suffering in some way because of me. "It's fine. I'm okay."

"At the very least, Miss Swirl, I could have warned you about her nature."

I tilted my head. "Her nature?"

Strong Wing nodded, and I blinked as I ...

~~~

... have no breath with which to scream. The horn jutting from the head of this horrid monster erupts in sickly green light which strikes my eyes. My already tortured mind offers little resistance ...

~~~

... caught a flicker of ...

Reality slowed, blurred, and re-coalesced.

"Queen Chrysalis tends to be a bit abrasive," said Strong Wing. "Perhaps a bit pushy and overbearing, and maybe engages in some hyperbole, but she usually has a very good point buried in her rhetoric."

Whatever had momentarily distracted me was gone, perhaps a figment of my emotional exhaustion. My initial protest vanished from my head, but I narrowed my eyes slightly and demanded, "How do you know this?"

"It's my duty to understand those whom I protect," said Strong Wing. "Or in this case, from whom I need to protect others. That's what I uncovered in my research about her."

I paused a long moment, my thoughts struggling like a swimmer against the tide. "But ... wh-why tell me this?"

Strong Wing smiled. "Just common courtesy, Miss Swirl. I would not want you to be put off by Queen Chrysalis' tone when her message could very well be of significant import to you."

When my mind had finally lurched back into gear, his words made some sense. Had I not just been thinking I needed to take a step back? Perhaps I had simply let Chrysalis' bombast threaten to obscure the message. I needed a way out, and I needed to give up the pendant; nothing had changed that. Chrysalis could still give me what--

Pain again flared behind my temples, and I rubbed a hoof against the side of my head. My heart raced suddenly, and the memory ... no, figment ... of green light flitted across my mental landscape. Slowly, I nodded. "Thank you, I appreciate you thinking of me. I have to admit, she did intimidate me a bit."

Strong Wing chuckled. "Yes, she does tend to do that. Princess Celestia can seem a little intimidating sometimes as well, but she simply has a more easy-going conversational style than Queen Chrysalis."

I smiled slightly. "That is very true."

"There is one last thing. Queen Chrysalis asked me to convey a message to you. She would be pleased if you were to grace the summit this afternoon with your presence."

My heart lurched. "But I thought she said she would give me a whole--!" I clamped my mouth shut.

"What shall I tell her, Miss Swirl?"

The headache was slow to abate, and my heart still pounded. I hated making a decision in this state, but what choice did I have?

"Miss Swirl?" Strong Wing prompted.

I sighed and lowered my hoof. "Tell her ... t-tell her I'll be there."

Strong Wing smiled and nodded. "She will be happy to hear that. Thank you for taking the time to listen to me, Miss Swirl." He started for the door. "I am glad I was able to help."

I simply nodded.

"I'll let myself out. Take care."

The door opened and closed, and he was gone.

Strong Wing's timely visit could help me focus better if I took his words to heart. That same heart still ached from how I had hurt Rarity, and how I had troubled Fluttershy, but all I had to do to lessen the sting was accept the guard's words. And yet ... Chrysalis had forced a deadline upon me. Perhaps that was for the best. The sooner I could remove myself from Equestria, the sooner I could stop hurting others and--

The sickly green glow permeated my thoughts again. My surroundings shimmered, as if incorporeal. Images flickered into brief coherence, only to escape discernment when I turned my mind's eye towards them. Until reality had recrystallized a moment later, I saw Michelle's apartment like in my--

I shook my head violently. The distractions needed to stop. I had a path forward, and I needed to follow it.

I just wished my head would stop hurting.

Not long after did I have another visitor. The relief which swept over me upon seeing Spike dissipated when Twilight stepped into view as well.

"Heya, Candy!" Spike called out, smiling.

"Hello, Candy," Twilight said in a more subdued voice, though the tiny smile that graced her muzzle seemed sincere.

"Um, hi," I said. I looked down at Spike. "Is it time for the tour you promised me?"

"Not quite," he said. "It's getting close to lunch, so there's not quite enough time for that, but there is just enough time for Twilight to take another look at your pendant."

"Oh."

"Then we can have lunch, and then I can take you on the tour!"

I should have expected this. Spike was Twilight's assistant, so naturally he had to defer to her wishes.

"This will not take long at all," said Twilight. "You can stay in the lab just like you did before. Feel free to ask me whatever you want about the process. You won't distract me, I can multitask well."

My heart thumped. Twilight might finally take my pendant away. Sure, one problem solved, but then I was still stuck in Equestria with these ponies knowing that I was an alien thanks to Chrysalis' threats.

Threats. Yes, Chrysalis had threatened me. Why did I not think that was significant? Well ... like Strong Wing had said ... all part of her abrasiveness ... but she had tried to bully me into ... no, I had to stop getting distracted!

My head twinged briefly again.

"If you do this for Twilight, I'll give you extra daffodils again with lunch!" said Spike.

"Again, Spike?" Twilight said with a small smirk.

"Ack! Not a second bribe! First bribe I ever gave her, I swear!"

I wished I didn't like Spike so much. "All right, I'll do it."

Twilight's smile became more natural. "Then just follow me."

"See ya in the dining hall afterward," Spike called out, waving as he left.

We proceeded into her lab in silence. It appeared more or less as it had before, save for the missing cushion on the floor. As soon as she had magicked the door closed behind us, however, she levitated a cushion into place, this time closer to the pedestal.

"If you would be so kind as to place your pendant here, please, Candy," Twilight said, nodding her head towards the pedestal.

I took a deep breath and did as she requested before sitting on the cushion.

Twilight lighted her horn. "So what I am attempting to do is check for lingering thaumic resonances that may tell me where in Equestria this was created. The magic field which permeates this world varies in power and texture depending on location, and the structure of the ley lines ..."

I let it all slide over my head. The technical details no longer mattered. As I watched her weave her spells, my thoughts reiterated Chrysalis' words: the Princess of Magic? An alicorn? Unable to perform such a simple magical feat?

"Twilight?" I asked.

"Mmm?" Twilight murmured as she levitated a piece of paper and quill into view.

"Is this fairly complex magic you're doing?"

Twilight scratched a note onto the paper. "Yes, actually. Trying to tease details like these out of the more overwhelming magical aura of the object is always a challenge."

I nodded slowly. My tail twitched. "But do you think you can do it?"

Her eyes narrowed on the pendant, the glow of her horn brightening as she jotted down another note. "I do believe I can, yes."

"So ... what about ... what about the binding magic?"

Twilight paused and turned her head towards me. "Come again?"

"The binding magic," I said a bit more forcefully. "That's complex, too, right?"

"Well, yes, but--"

"So I thought maybe you should be able to do that, too."

Twilight put down the paper and quill. "Candy, is there something else you want to ask me?"

What was prompting me to do this? Was I trying to make Twilight suspect I knew the truth? Or at least the truth as Chrysalis had presented it? "Um ... no, not really."

"I think there is."

I tensed for a moment. "All right, fine. Why can't you break the binding magic yourself on the pendant?"

"I told you, it would take a great deal of research and--"

"Yet you can cast the spells you're doing now like it's nothing!"

"We're talking about two different things."

"But you're the Princess of Magic! Aren't you powerful enough to do it?"

Twilight sighed. "I am not all-powerful. There are limits on what I can do. Everypony has limits."

"Even Princess Celestia?"

"Even her, yes."

"But she can move the sun!" I cried. "She can't do this?!"

Twilight trotted over to me. "Candy, what prompted this?"

I swallowed. "N-nothing, I just ..."

"Did somepony tell you I should be able to do this? Or that Princess Celestia could?"

"No," I snapped.

"Are you su--?"

"Yes, I'm sure!"

Twilight paused before she said in a soft voice, "Is there something you want to talk to me about?"

God, I was so fucking tired of hearing that question, or any number of its sickening variants. My pent up frustration and pain would surely explode if I tried to answer her. I refused to hurt anypony else before I could remove myself as their problem.

Twilight sat down next to me. "Candy, you need to understand, we're all here to help you."

I trembled and looked away.

"We all want to be your friends."

My ears flattened against my head.

"Have you at least given Rarity and Fluttershy a chance?"

I sighed. "Is that what they were summoned to do?"

Twilight paused. "Summoned?"

"Y-you heard what I said," I said in a quavering voice. "Were they summoned to do this by some ... s-some magical device?"

Twilight sighed. "You saw the Cutie Map."

"You mean that thing in the council room?" I said softly, but with a slight acid edge to my voice. "Yes."

"You're completely misinterpreting the situation."

I turned my head towards her. "How? Are you saying they weren't chosen somehow?"

"Yes, they were, but that doesn't make their feelings any less genuine towards you."

I just stared at her.

"It could have chosen any of us, and we all would have done the same for you," said Twilight. "And we're still all willing to help, even those of us who have not been chosen. You're not just some task to be completed, or a problem to be solved, Candy. Even when the Map decides Rarity and Fluttershy need to do something else, they're not going to simply wash their hooves of you. The Map is a catalyst for friendship, not a match-maker of the moment. Which also means it can't do everything. You have to be willing."

It all came back to me again. I had to take the next step. I had to bridge the gap.

Chrysalis had said they were all lying to me. Strong Wing said Chrysalis could go overboard. What of Chrysalis' words was I supposed to believe? Just the part about giving up the pendant? Or of going home? Or of not fitting in?

Did Twilight just blow her chance to help me with the pendant? She had to have that much power, either her or Celestia! This was a stupid fairy-tale world where magic solved everything! Or maybe friendship solved everything. Or maybe next they'll tell me something even more insane, that friendship is magic here.

Or Chrysalis was wrong ...

I closed my eyes, hoping for clarity again, but all that came to me was Rarity in the boutique, emotionally wounded from my rejection of her, and the concerned face of Fluttershy uttering those words that still echoed in my head: locking yourself away is never the answer.

Memory flickered in harsh clarity: the weeks after my mother's death and railing at how unfair and cruel it had been; the long weeks after Michelle's death and my endless self-recrimination at how I should have seen it, and the barely healing wounds of my mother's death reopened; my arrival in a strange land in an even stranger body knowing nothing of what to say or do. None of it had ever sent me into such depths of emotional turmoil. My psyche felt like it had been split, and the two sides played against each other.

I felt Twilight's hoof on my shoulder. "Maybe we should do this another day," she said softly. "I'm sorry I was so insistent."

I opened my eyes and blinked away tears. I nodded, my throat too tight for words. I rose and took the pendant back, letting the clasp close itself. It had paused, as if even it were reluctant now, sensing I had rejected it.

"Do you need me to tell Spike you can't--"

"No," I rasped. I cleared my throat and took a deep breath. "I ... I still want to have lunch with him and go on that tour. I could use the distraction."

Twilight nodded and stood. "The summit is not until three. If you need to talk to me, come find me. I'll be in the main hall preparing for the summit."

"Thank you," I said softly.

I thought I would need time alone to calm down, but the sight of Spike and his cheery disposition lightened my heart enough to keep the emotional tide at bay. I actually managed a small smile as he slid the tray before me, reminding me of the island of calm that lunch had been the day before amidst the ocean of turmoil and confusion.

The generous application of daffodils to my tray also helped.

He hopped into a chair opposite me, a tray of precious stones before him. "So how'd it go with Twilight? She find anything about the pendant?"

His tone and casual stance betrayed no indication he even suspected my near emotional breakdown. "It didn't go quite as well as it could have, no," I said in a soft voice.

"Aw, that's too bad. She was hoping to confirm that theory of hers."

I wondered if I might be able to wheedle out of him the bits of Twilight's theory that she wouldn't tell me, but I didn't need any more guilt. "She thought we could try again another time."

"She'll figure it out," said Spike with a smile as he popped a gem into his mouth. "She's a smart pony. Like you."

"Like ... um ... I'm not terribly smart, trust me."

"Aw, sure you are!"

"I really don't feel like it."

Spike waved a claw. "Eh, knowing lots of stuff is not the same."

I paused. "I beg your pardon?"

"Er ... what I mean is ... you can be smart, but not know a lot of facts. Ah, I don't mean you don't know a lot of facts, just that ... some ponies don't!"

I considered for a moment, chewing slowly on a piece of asparagus. "Well, I guess maybe I don't know as many things as most ponies. I was on my own for awhile, and I wasn't exactly going to school during that time."

"So, there, see?" said Spike. "Hardly your fault."

That was debatable. I did stay in school during my time following my mother's death, but my head was not there. A's and B's had fallen to D's and F's in the space of a single semester. After Michelle's death, education ceased to be a priority.

"Um, so," Spike said cautiously. "If I happen to mention anything you don't get, you can just ask me, okay?"

But why should I spoil it now? I needed to maintain the illusion for only a little longer. Then it simply wouldn't matter anymore.

If I went through with it.

I smiled faintly at Spike. "It's okay. Sometimes I just like to listen and not have to think all that much. That's all."

"Hey, no problem! Anyway, it would be a good idea to get lunch out of the way so we have time for that tour. You, um, still want to do that, right?"

"I do," I said. "I'm looking forward to it."

I wanted to go home. I didn't want to hurt anypony. I wanted to rid myself of the pendant.

No matter what I did, I couldn't have it all, even if I followed Chrysalis to the ends of Equestria. My thoughts ran in tumultuous circles, going nowhere useful, and I had no idea why. The summit hurtled at me from the rapidly closing window of time, robbing me of any further options.

Spike had hinted at breakfast that he wanted to take me somewhere. I had assumed it had to do with Chrysalis, but that theory was dead once Strong Wing conveyed the changeling queen's wishes to me. Maybe this would be what I needed to help clear my head and make the path obvious. It had to be.

It was my last chance.

Chapter 17 - A Decision Made

"Um, Candy, are you really sure you want to go there?"

I swallowed hard. "Y-yes, Spike, I am. Please, take me to the meeting hall."

"Well, okay," Spike said as he walked on ahead. "I hope you know what you're doing."

I trotted an unsteady path, as if my hooves were as ungainly as they had been that first day. I took several deep breaths to steady myself. Spike gave me a concerned look over his shoulder. Was he just worried over my well-being, or did he think I was flat-out crazy?

We turned down a corridor, and my breath caught. Ahead were two tall doors, standing open, a guard on either side. I flinched when I heard Chrysalis' silky voice from the hall beyond, "Oh, but we were having such an interesting conversation, dear Twilight."

"Candy?" Spike said in a soft voice. "You okay?"

Only then did I realize I had stopped.

"That discussion is over!" Twilight snapped.

I stared through the open doors. The diarchs and Twilight stood to the right, while Chrysalis stood to the left. My heart leapt into my throat.

"Over?" said Chrysalis with a chuckle. "Just when it was getting interesting? When you obviously have so much more you wanted to say about it?"

I squeezed my eyes shut. Chrysalis' enticing words from our meeting pounded against the inside of my skull: just give up the pendant, and all the pain will be gone. An ache flooded my head again as the raging waters gathered behind the dam, just as they had while I read about the Elements of Harmony.

Spike laid a claw gently against my fore-leg. "Are you sure you--"

"Spike, you can leave now," I said. "I have to take it from here."

"How can I make this any more clear?" Twilight cried. "The wedding is in the past! I don't want or need to talk about it anymore!"

Spike glanced towards the doors and sighed. "All right. I'll be in the dining hall if you need me."

I nodded without tearing my gaze from the scene ahead.

"Oh, but you're the Princess of Friendship," said Chrysalis in a mocking voice. "Do you not always want to talk out these sort of things? Am I not worthy of that consideration?"

I flinched as I heard Applejack's voice. "Personally, I think yer jus' tryin' to get a rise outta her."

I remembered how I believed she could read my intentions even before I knew the Element she represented. She knew I was hiding something. And now ... did she think Chrysalis was hiding something as well? I clung to that thought to bolster my courage.

"Applejack!" Twilight hissed. "I thought I had told you all that I would do the talking?"

Why was Twilight angry with her? I thought they were all friends, that they were on the same side. Had Chrysalis been right after all about ...

No. Fluttershy had said it didn't work that way. They were not perfect. I could not expect them to be perfect.

Princess Celestia stepped forward. "With all due respect, Queen Chrysalis, it was you who insisted the summit start early, and now you appear intent on further delay yourself."

Chrysalis narrowed her eyes. "Everypony is not yet present."

Celestia stepped back just enough for Luna's gaze to find me. My mouth dropped open when she nodded slightly. Running away ceased forever to be an option. I willed my hooves to pull me forward.

"What are you talking about?" Twilight cried. "All three Princesses are here. You're here. Who else could possibly--?"

Two spears suddenly crossed before me just as I reached the threshold. My chest brushed against the shafts of their weapons before I could stop suddenly, the sharp clop of my hooves announcing my presence scant seconds before a guard shouted, "Halt!"

Twilight turned her head. "Candy? What are you doing here?"

My gaze shifted to the right, and my voice refused to work. The other ponies -- the Element-bearers, the ones who wanted to be my friends -- stood off to the side, their eyes upon me. I wanted to cringe as I met Rarity's gaze, convinced that I would still see the hurt I caused her. Instead, her eyes betrayed both confusion and concern. Fluttershy appeared surprised but even more deeply worried.

"Let her in," demanded Chrysalis.

"What??" said Twilight.

"Admit her! I invited her."

Applejack frowned. "I don't like this."

Twilight glanced at me, wide-eyed, then turned towards Celestia and Luna.

"This is your decision, Twilight," said Celestia. "You are in charge of this summit."

"Indeed," said Luna. "Though it is not at all a mystery as to why Candy has been summoned."

"I will remind you it is within my rights to call upon anypony I wish as an advocate," said Chrysalis. "You cannot refuse me." Her lips curled into a sly smile. "Unless dear Princess Twilight wishes to concede that my earlier allegations concerning her feelings are true."

Advocate? Yes, of course. She was sure I would give up the pendant. Her argument had been very convincing and remained such. Her words still played to all my vulnerabilities and needs, at least what I thought I needed.

Shining Armor stepped forward, and my heart skipped a beat when his gaze met mine with a suspicion that far outweighed anything he had heaped upon me in the library. He marched up to Twilight. "Twiley, you can't let her in, not after what I told you earlier."

"This is non-negotiable!" Chrysalis thundered.

Shining whirled around and faced Chrysalis. "We know all about your meeting with Candy last night!"

I stumbled back as if struck. They knew?

That explained Twilight's attitude towards me that morning. I was stupid to think the guards would not make a full report. Strong Wing had said they couldn't hear us, but why hadn't Twilight said anything? Was she content to string me along and let me fret over this? She couldn't intervene and take the burden of this decision away from me?

Or was it truly as Luna had said, that only I could make this decision?

I risked another glance at the others. Rarity's eyes still shimmered with deep concern and worry, Fluttershy's even more so.

Twilight took a slow breath and said, "Let her in."

Shining sighed. "Very well." He turned towards the entrance. "Guards, admit her."

The spears rose, and I stepped forward, the clopping of my hooves echoing loudly in the sudden absolute silence of the hall, its high, vaulted ceiling almost as imposing as the presence of the diarchs. The gaze of the ponies weighed upon me, making me want to sink into the floor.

"That's far enough," said Chrysalis.

I stopped and raised my gaze to hers, my ears flattening. She wore a sly and almost malevolent smile, and her eyes glittered as they beheld the pendant. Her desire for it was a palpable force wanting to pull me towards her, but I resisted approaching. I stood no closer to the changeling queen than I did the alicorns, but I felt exposed just the same.

Strong Wing stood to her left. He regarded me with stoic indifference, as if we had never enjoyed our conversation earlier. Another guard, a unicorn, stood to her right.

Twilight trotted forward, standing only a few pony-lengths from me. "All right, Chry ... Queen Chrysalis, she's here. What's this all about?"

Chrysalis chuckled. "You'll see soon enough. I believe Candy has something she wishes to give me."

Twilight gasped. "Candy, no! You can't give the pendant to her! We don't know what she'll do with it!"

Hooves clopped softly, and Rarity's voice rose from almost directly behind me, "Please, Candy, reconsider this course of action."

My heart lurched. My vision threatened to blur into a watery mess.

"Candy?" came Fluttershy's whispery voice, rising just above the gentle flap of her wings. "Please don't do this."

I sniffled once and wiped my eyes. I took a deep breath and willed the tears away. No more crying. No more hysterics. I had to face this head-on. I had to think.

Fluttershy didn't understand. None of them did. I would have better luck holding a soap bubble than carrying this pendant. But I did have the strength to stop being stupid. I knew exactly who did have the fortitude to bear this burden.

A rush of wind ruffled my mane, blowing a few strands of hair before my eyes. I brushed them aside and flinched when I saw Rainbow Dash hovering before me.

"You can't do this!" she cried. "Come on, Candy, what gives?! You gonna trust her over us?!"

I stumbled back a step. "Rainbow, you don't understand, I--!"

"You cannot make the decision for her!" Chrysalis yelled.

Rainbow whirled around to face her. "I can sure as hay stop her from doing this!"

"No, you can't," said Twilight.

"What?! Come on, Twilight!"

"No. The binding magic on the pendant is too powerful. It will remain with whomever she chooses to give it to." After a pause, she added in a low voice, "If she gives it up."

"Rainbow Dash," said Luna. "Let Candy make her decision. I am sure she will make the right one."

Rainbow sighed and flew back to the others.

No, I couldn't make the right one. I could make a decision, but not the right decision. The right decision was to keep the pendant and remain loyal to Michelle, to reject the idea that the pendant endangered me. But I was no Element of Loyalty.

I forced my head up and leveled my gaze at Chrysalis. It would be easier if I didn't look at her, but I had to face her. I had to stop being a coward. Her words still pounded against my brain, and her promises still tugged at my heart. I looked her in the eye anyway. "I don't think you understand what--"

"Enough delay!" Chrysalis shouted. "Give me the pendant now!"

I trembled like I had under her bombast the night before, but I refused to cringe. I gave up trying to announce my intentions and instead focused my waning strength into my thoughts instead. I sat down on my haunches and dipped my head. I reached for my pendant with hooves far steadier than I ever thought I could accomplish. The others gasped softly.

"Candy ... no ..." Fluttershy's quavering voice floated to me.

I did not dare pause to answer her. My courage still hung by a thread. The clasp came free, and the pendant tumbled into my hooves. Only then did I turn my head to speak--

A green glow suddenly suffused the pendant. My heart wrenched as it flew from my grasp. My widening eyes rose to the glow of Chrysalis' horn. Pain burst through my head again, and the dam strained.

"At last!" Chrysalis cried as she levitated the pendant before her. "After pursuing it for years across two worlds, the artifact is finally mine!"

My heart thundered. I quelled my panic though a sheer application of will but trembled with the effort.

"I told you we should've tried to stop her!" Rainbow cried just before she rocketed forward in a multicolored blur.

"Wait, Rainbow, no!" Twilight cried.

I saw it as well: a faint, shimmering, green cocoon of energy had risen around Chrysalis, and Rainbow smacked head-on into it. My stomach flipped as I heard the sickening thud when the dazed pegasus fell to the floor in a heap.

Celestia's eyes narrowed, and her horn blazed. Luna's and Twilight's lighted as well, all three alicorns taking a combative stance before the changeling queen as the other ponies rushed forward towards the downed Rainbow Dash. "You can't take on all of us, Chrysalis!" Twilight shouted. "That force field of yours won't last long!"

Chrysalis laughed, and all I wanted to do was stuff my hooves in my ears. "It will last long enough for me to do this!"

Chrysalis' horn glowed brighter. Bolts from all three alicorns' horns sizzled through the air, exploding against Chrysalis' shield in a spray of burning sparks that skittered across the floor. Her shield flickered but held. The pendant itself started to glow.

Applejack looked up and cried, "Twi, what's goin' on?! What's she doin'?!"

"She's casting some sort of spell on it!" Twilight cried as she fired another bolt from her horn. "She's trying to use the artifact as some sort of energy trap! I can't stop her until we get through her shield!"

"Twilight!" Celestia cried as she let off another golden bolt. "You and your friends may need to call on their Rainbow Power!"

"You will deny myself and my changelings nourishment no more!" Chrysalis said. "If you will not give it, I will take it! Today, from all of Ponyville, and then Canterlot, and, soon, from all of Eque -- what?!"

The pendant had vanished ...

... and I felt a weight in my mane.

I let out a quavering sigh as Chrysalis' remaining influence over me shattered. The three Princesses paused in their attacks.

"What happened?!" Chrysalis cried, her eyes wide. "Where is the artifact?!"

Pinkie Pie bounced around me. "Oo! I know this one! I know this one! Can I answer? Huh? CanIcanIcanIcanI?" She dug her hoof into my mane and lifted the pendant out. "Yay! I was right! What do I win?"

"Huh?" Applejack cried. "What in tarnation jus' happened?!"

"What is the meaning of this?!" Chrysalis thundered. "You were going to give up the pendant to me!"

I cast a burning gaze at her. "I didn't say I was going to give it up to you!" I snatched the pendant from Pinkie's hoof. "Twilight, could you please come over here?"

Twilight exchanged a look with the others before trotting over to me, a bemused expression on her face. She gasped when I turned to her and fit the pendant around her neck. "Candy, what are you--??"

"What I should have done days ago," I said in a choked voice.

Yet as I brought the ends together under Twilight's mane, the clasp would not close.

"I'm not giving you up forever," I whispered as I gazed down at the pendant. "I'm just not strong enough emotionally to handle you right now. Let me give you to Twilight. I ... I trust her."

The clasp clicked closed. Twilight slowly smiled.

"You little traitor," Chrysalis snarled. "You little worthless--"

"SHUT UP!" I bellowed as I whirled around, taking a few steps towards her. My head still hurt, but I didn't care; it was nothing compared to my rage. "You lied to me! You told me the magic of that pendant was irrelevant! And you tried to control me!"

"Wait, she did what?!" Shining Armor cried.

"You heard me! She affected my mind somehow. I mean, yeah, I was really emotionally screwed up at the time, so she didn't have to do much, but she did something!"

"But that's impossible. The guards would have detected it thanks to Twilight's spell."

Chrysalis laughed as her shield flickered out. "Oh, nice try, little not-pony. Nice try."

"Huh?" came Rainbow's bemused voice as she rubbed her head. "Not-pony? What the hay is she talking about?"

My blood ran cold.

"A fine attempt to implicate me as the villain in something you were so eager to participate in yourself," said Chrysalis in a silky voice.

"You mean you browbeat me into it!" I cried.

"And how did I do this when we had nothing more than a calm, rational discussion?"

"There was nothing calm or rational about it!"

Shining Armor stepped towards me. "That's not what I was told."

I blinked. "Wait, what?"

"It's true," Twilight said. "Shining said the report he received was that you and her had a casual discussion on the balcony."

"But--!"

"Candy, it doesn't matter, you did the right thing in the end. You--"

"But that's a lie!" I cried. "I did not collaborate willingly with her! All right, th-that's not the whole story. Yes, I listened to her. I almost gave her the pendant." I sighed and ran a hoof through my mane. "Look, I admit, maybe I did want to give it to her, just to take an easy way out. Part of this was my fault, but she took advantage of me when I was vulnerable. She pushed me into doing it. I've had to fight her influence all this time!"

Rarity stepped beside me. "Twilight, I believe her."

My eyes widened.

Fluttershy landed next to me. "I believe her, too."

"If they believe her, that's good enough fer me!" said Applejack.

"Well, I'm not gonna believe this flying bag of ugly over her!" Rainbow said.

"Oo, can I believe her, too?" Pinkie said. She leaned over to me and whispered, "Actually, I believed you all along."

My eyes teared again, and this time I let them.

"You are all fools!" Chrysalis shouted. "You believe this little not-pony over one of your own trusted guards?!"

"What is it with her and this 'not-pony' stuff?" Rainbow said.

I tried not to cringe when Rainbow looked at me with a puzzled expression on her face.

"Um, Prince Shining Armor?" said Chrysalis' unicorn guard in an uneasy voice. "Miss Swirl's account is correct."

"It is?" Shining and Twilight said in unison.

Queen Chrysalis bared her teeth. Her gaze shifted down and flicked between the unicorn guard and Strong Wing before narrowing on the latter.

"Yes," said the guard. "Miss Swirl looked quite distressed. She even stomped her hooves at least once, and it was clear Queen Chrysalis was shouting at her at one point."

Shining frowned. "Strong Wing!"

The pegasus guard continued to look forward, holding his spear rigidly at his side. "Yes, Your Highness?"

"Why was your account of the meeting between Miss Swirl and Queen Chrysalis so different than your fellow guards?"

Strong Wing paused. "I am at a loss, Your Highness."

I stared at Strong Wing. My head throbbed. The dam strained further.

"At a loss? What's that supposed to mean?"

"I'll tell ya what it means!" Applejack declared. "It means somepony ain't tellin' the truth!"

"With all due respect to Captain Strong Wing," said the unicorn guard. "Miss Swirl's guards on duty that evening will corroborate my story. We specifically voiced our concerns to the Captain, and he promised he would bring it to your attention, Your Highness."

Shining narrowed his eyes on Strong Wing. "What do you have to say for yourself?"

"Perhaps ... perhaps I was mistaken," said Strong Wing.

"That was a pretty big 'mistake!' Twiley, tell me something. Did Strong Wing ever take an unescorted trip outside the castle without being scanned upon his return?"

"No, not that I'm aware of," said Twilight. She paused. "But ... wait ... when he chased the changeling, he briefly entered the forest. He was out of view for just a ..." She trailed off. Her eyes narrowed. She stepped up to Strong Wing, her horn glowing. "Stand still."

"Princess, wait!" Strong Wing cried. "Is this really--?"

A black stripe rose from the pegasus' hooves, and I recognized the spell at once: the same one she had cast on me to check if I were a changeling. It had resulted in lots of purple dots with a scattering of red for me. But for Strong Wing, the black bands were splattered with bright green.

Twilight aborted her spell only seconds in and recoiled. "This guard is a changeling!"

Chrysalis' unicorn guard whipped his spear around and trained it on Strong Wing. Half a dozen other guards rushed over and leveled their spears at him as well.

My head was spinning. The memory of Strong Wing's visit whirled in my head, tinged green. My head would not stop hurting.

Fluttershy lay a hoof on my shoulder. "Candy, are you okay?"

Words would not come to me. All I could do was give her a helpless look.

Shining Armor loomed over Strong Wing. "Drop the disguise."

"Your Highness--"

"Now!"

Strong Wing looked at me, and my heart turned to ice. "Very well," he said in a low voice as he let the spear clatter to the floor.

In a flash, the pegasus was no more. I recoiled as a black, insectile creature hovered before me, its glowing green eyes staring ...

... a scar across its left eye ...

... like in Michelle's ...

...

The dam burst.

~~~

I pound on the door, but Michelle does not hear me. She wails out her distress one more time: "Why are you doing this to me?! I thought you were my friend!"

I have no time to summon help. It is me or no one. I kick the door once, twice, and on the third try, the lock splinters from the frame. The door flies open, and I burst inside, about to shout my friend's name. The cry dies before it even reaches my lips. My eyes widen, my heart leaping into my throat, sanity threatening to fall off the edge of the Earth as I see myself standing over my fallen friend.

"Who are you?!" I demand. "Why do you look ..."

And then the doppleganger transforms.

An insectile horror hovers on buzzing wings, its glowing green eyes fix upon me, a scar slashes across its left eye. I stumble back in horror, but somehow, the door is closed, and my back slams against it.

The creature flies towards me, and I have no breath with which to scream. The horn jutting from the head of this horrid monster erupts in sickly green light which strikes my eyes. My already tortured mind offers little resistance, almost welcoming the merciful stupor into which it falls, my eyes wide, staring, and glazed.

A siren wails outside. The creature utters a guttural sound in a language I do not recognize before turning to me again. "You did not see me."

I simply nod, slack-jawed.

"You saw an empty apartment, save for your friend."

I know of no other truth, so I again nod.

"All you know is, you never got to her in time. That is all you will ever think whenever you try to recall this moment."

A tear trickles down my face, but I simply nod again.

"You will awaken in ten seconds." The creature flies over to the window, its horn glowing. The window glows as well and slides open. It slips into the night, the window glowing and closing in its wake ...

~~~

The pain in my head vanished.

Everything else faded into the background, as if we coexisted in an isolated pocket of reality. All my pain and rage suddenly had what it had lacked for so long: a focus other than myself. The strength I had found to stand up to Chrysalis now waned like the dying wind after a storm, but I clung to it long enough to reject the taunts from the darker recesses of my mind to pin all the blame for this on Equestria.

No. The one to blame was right in front of me.

"Candy, what are you ...?" I heard Twilight say as I marched up to it.

"Why did you do it?" I demanded. I knew the logical answer: it wanted the pendant. That's not what I was looking for.

The changeling simply hovered and stared at me.

"Why did you kill my friend?!"

The other ponies fell utterly silent.

The changeling narrowed its eyes, but otherwise did not react.

I stomped my fore-hooves and screamed, "ANSWER ME!"

The changeling finally spoke, its voice raspy and slightly out-of-sync, and, strangely enough, female. "I don't have to answer for my actions to an insignificant not-pony."

I wanted something from it. Anything from begging for forgiveness to malevolent gloating would have sufficed. It would have satisfied me in some way. But not this. Not cold indifference.

How could I lash out at it? Words had failed. I had no magic. I doubted I could coordinate my hooves enough to throttle it or strike it. My body ached as badly as my heart, so bucking it would be just as ineffective. All I could do was hate.

My rage burned out, and I turned away. I clenched my teeth against tears I didn't want to shed, but I had little strength left. A pony drew me into a tight hug, my vision too blurred with tears to see who it was. I simply hugged her back as tight as I could.

"It w-won't even admit it," I moaned. "It killed my friend and just doesn't care ... I th-thought her death was my fault all this time. But it wasn't! It wasn't my fault!"

"Shhh," I heard a gentle whisper in my ear, a hoof stroking my mane gently.

"What is this madness?!" Chrysalis roared.

"Sh-she just said this ... this changeling k-killed her friend ... oh, g-goodness ..."

That ... that was Fluttershy's voice. I thought she was hugging me. Only then did I blink my eyes free enough of tears to see the fall of purple hair. "R-Rarity ...?" I croaked.

"Shh, Candy, it's okay," she said in a soothing, if slightly quavering voice.

My heart melted, and I let myself weep softly into her fur.

"I'm confused," said Twilight. "What friend is this?"

"What difference does it make?!" Rainbow said. "This changeling killed somepony!"

"LIES!" Chrysalis bellowed. "Changelings do not drain to the point of death!"

"I beg to differ," came Luna's icy voice.

"And what proof do you have for this ludicrous accusation?" Chrysalis growled as I lifted my head towards them, wiping my eyes.

"Perhaps you forget that I can see into dreams. I have seen her struggle against this suppressed memory."

My jaw fell. "I ... y-you ... you knew it was me?!"

Luna smiled. "Not until that night at the castle, when you came to the window while my visage was still in the moon."

"But why didn't you say anything?"

"It is as I had said," said Luna. "Some things the dreamer needs to work out for herself. I knew the first time I saw your friend that she had been drained by a changeling, but you would never have believed me, and I feared that revealing it might trigger some other part of the spell and prevent you from ever retrieving your memory."

"Luna confided this to me, Candy Swirl," said Celestia softly. "I agreed with her reasons for not pushing the matter with you."

"I wish somepony had told me," Twilight muttered.

"That's not what I meant!" I cried. "Why didn't you say anything about ... um ..."

My heart thumped. Luna -- and Celestia! -- knew I was an alien, ironically, as far back as when Chrysalis sent me the letter.

"Changelings do not kill!" Chrysalis cried.

"Then maybe you should do exactly what you claimed you would do with the changeling who tried to trick me out of my pendant!" I shouted in a choked voice. "Discipline it severely!"

"I will not take advice on dealing with my hive from a worthless little not-pony," Chrysalis growled.

I recoiled when she took a step towards me. Both Rarity and Fluttershy leapt in front of me.

"Don't. Even. Think it," said Rarity.

Twilight marched up to Chrysalis. "This summit is over. You've quite proven that you came here for no other reason than to secure this pendant."

"I agree with Princess Twilight," said Celestia. "This supposed offer of peace was no more than a sham."

"And a very thinly disguised one at that," said Luna. "We suspected from the start, but we needed to know exactly what you really wanted."

Rainbow turned to Twilight. "Now can I kick some flank?"

"You won't need to," said Twilight. "Chrysalis will be leaving."

"The sooner the better," Applejack declared.

"Yes, please leave," said Rarity. "Before you upset Candy further."

Chrysalis laughed. "Oh, how touching. How wonderfully touching. So much love for this little not-pony that I can almost feed on it alone. So much sentiment, so much blind acceptance and friendship."

Rainbow rolled her eyes. "Ugh, does she ever shut up?"

Chrysalis chuckled. "But I will now tell you who ... or what ... you are dealing with."

I took a deep breath and said, "No. You won't."

"And how do you intend to stop me?"

"Because I'm going to tell them myself." I turned to face the others. Everypony stared at me, some almost strangely expectant. I looked at Luna, and she gave me an encouraging smile. "I'm ... I-I'm not quite what I seem. Chrysalis called me a not-pony for a reason ... I mean, I am a pony, this is not a disguise or something, but ..." I sighed, lowering my gaze. "I'm sorry for not making sense, this is hard."

Rarity draped a foreleg around me. "Remember what I told you: whatever happened in your past will not affect how we feel about you now."

I took a deep breath and lifted my head. "I said I'm a pony, but I wasn't one until I appeared in Sweet Apple Acres a few days ago. I-I'm an alien."

Pinkie gasped. The other ponies looked surprised as well, but their demeanor otherwise remained no more than expectant.

"I'm from another world," I said in a strained voice. "I was brought here by Discord."

"I knew he was up to somethin'!" Applejack said. "I just knew it!"

"No, wait!" Fluttershy cried. "He wouldn't do that! Candy, a-are you sure--?"

"Fluttershy, please, it's okay!" I said. "As much as maybe I hated him at first for doing this to me, he ... he saved my life. I'd be dead if he hadn't intervened."

Fluttershy gasped, her pupils shrinking slightly.

"Uh, this is Discord we're talkin' about, right?" Applejack said.

"Yes," I said. "He really did save my life. I don't know, maybe he could've done it some other way, maybe he has some other agenda, but that's beside the point." I sighed. "I am so very sorry for lying to you all. I was scared. I was in a body I didn't understand in a world that didn't make sense. I mean, I've started to get used to it, even ... e-even enjoy some of my time here, but I didn't know who to trust, and, well ... I've kinda got other issues, too."

Pinkie suddenly marched up to me with an unusually serious expression on her face. "Well, I have only one thing to say to you about all this, little alien missy!"

I blinked and stared. "Huh?"

She burst out into a smile. "This means we have to have three parties for you! A welcome to Ponyville party, a welcome to Equestria party, aaaand a welcome to being-a-pony party!"

I couldn't help it. I giggled.

"Did you not hear her?!" Chrysalis thundered. "She's an alien! She's not one of you!"

Celestia strode forward. "It does not matter what form she has now, or that she ever had, or that she will have. We do not allow such trivial things to affect our friendships. I consider her as much one of us as anypony else in this room."

"She lied to you!" Chrysalis cried.

"So what?" Applejack said. "She told the truth in the end. We don't go holdin' no grudges against somepony 'cuz they made a mistake. She owned up to it." She narrowed her gaze at Michelle's murderer. "Lot more than I can say for you."

I teared up again. Fluttershy gave me a brief hug, smiling softly. When Rarity pulled me close again, I swallowed hard and said, "R-Rarity, please, I didn't lie about everything. I really had a mother in the fashion industry, and I really did live in a big city, and I really did like it when we ..."

I trailed off when she gently placed a hoof to my muzzle. "Let's settle things here first," she said in a soft voice. "We'll talk later."

I nodded, smiling. "Thank you."

"Yes, let's settle this now," Twilight declared. She stepped up to Chrysalis. "The summit is over. Your presence is no longer wanted here."

"And you still will not admit it," Chrysalis snarled. "Applejack talks about owning up to the truth. Own up to your own feelings! Own up to your hatred for me!"

Twilight paused. Her eyes slid towards her friends, who gave her a questioning look. She uttered a soft sigh and hung her head. "Fine. I will. But not here. And not in front of you. I won't give you the satisfaction." She looked up. "Get out of my castle."

Chrysalis narrowed her eyes at Twilight. "So much for the touted Princess of Friendship."

Twilight's eyes glistened for a moment, and she uttered another sigh.

"Whoa! Wait!" Rainbow said, thrusting a hoof at the changeling. "You gonna just let this piece of trash go?!"

"We don't have a choice," said Twilight.

"But this thing killed Candy's friend!"

"I don't like it either! But I don't have control over the changelings, and I don't fully understand what's going on yet."

Rainbow fumed. "Fine." She erupted into a spectral streak aimed right at the changeling.

"Rainbow!" Twilight shouted, but by the time the warning had left her lips, the pegasus' fore-hoof had smashed into the changeling's jaw, sending it tumbling to the floor. I wished I could have done that.

Chrysalis cast an icy gaze at Rainbow, and her horn started to glow.

Celestia, Luna, and Twilight stepped forward, their own horns glowing. "Don't even think you have a chance of winning against all of us," said Celestia in a voice of deadly calm.

Chrysalis clenched her teeth and let the glow in her horn fade. She nudged the changeling to its hooves and slowly turned away.

Shining Armor stepped forward. "Guards! See that they leave the castle. Rainbow Dash, would be so kind as to contact the Wonderbolts contingent in Ponyville and have them ensure these two leave Equestria?"

"You got it!" Rainbow said before rocketing out of the room.

Shining marched over to me. "It would seem I owe you another apology." He gave me an awkward smile and rubbed his mane. "I'm trying not to make a habit of this, really."

I managed a tiny smile. "Thank you, it's fine."

"I suggest we retire to someplace more comfortable," said Celestia. "I'm sure there is still much to discuss."

And for once, such an announcement did not fill me with a sense of dread.

Author's Note

Thanks for hanging in there to see the conclusion of this plot! One more chapter, and we will have reached the end of Part One of this story.

Chapter 18 - Explanations

I looked down at the tray Spike had placed on the floor before my cushion, but before I could stretch my achy forelegs towards it, a soft glow cocooned it. It rose and hovered before me, allowing me to close my hooves around it. I turned my head and smiled at Rarity as the glow faded from both the cup and her horn. "Thank you," I said in a soft voice.

She smiled in return before turning to her own teacup.

As much as I enjoyed the coffee I had sampled earlier, caffeine was the last thing I needed. Many emotions still spun in my head, challenging me to decide what to feel. For the moment, I was content to simply listen.

Save for Shining Armor and Rainbow Dash, we had retired to a chamber on an upper floor of the castle's spire. Faceted sunlight shone through tall, crystalline windows, playing off the pastel tapestries and suffusing the room with a warm and soothing glow. The small, round table in the center was the only furniture to be found. We sat upon thick, soft cushions arranged in a haphazard circle. Rarity sat to my right and Fluttershy to my left.

My ears perked up when I heard my name.

"Candy, I should tell you what I was reluctant to reveal earlier this morning," Twilight said. She had left her cushion, her still-full teacup steaming untouched on its platter as she paced the chamber. The pendant hung from her neck, glowing faintly in the refracted sunlight as she trotted. "I had told you I had some idea of the location of Starswirl's lab where he forged your pendant. I believe he had built it on the very edge of Equestrian lands, near the badlands to be precise."

"The badlands?" I said. At least now I could admit my ignorance without worry.

Celestia lowered her teacup. "It is where the changelings were sent after their failed invasion of Canterlot. We believe they originated there."

"Chrysalis told me they lived in a wasteland. I guess that part of what she said was true."

"We honestly have little idea what's out there," said Twilight. "Nopony has ever made an effort to chart that area. But if Starswirl did indeed have his lab near their lands, that would explain how Chrysalis came to know about the pendant. She likely found the remains of the lab and perhaps a journal he left behind."

"What I don't like is how she was able to get to this here filly's world," said Applejack. "How do ya reckon she did that?"

"She must have a portal somewhere," said Twilight. "Likely deep in her hive where she can draw on natural magic sources or the combined magic of her drones."

"She had promised to send me home in exchange for the pendant," I said in a subdued voice. "I guess I was foolish enough to believe Chrysalis could simply wave a hoof and open the portal anywhere she liked."

"Do we need to worry 'bout her messin' with Candy's homeworld?" asked Applejack.

"As single-minded as Chrysalis is, that's highly unlikely," said Twilight.

With all my focus on myself, I had not even considered the possibility that the changelings could seriously mess with things in my world. I had to take Twilight at her word, as I had enough things to worry about.

I took another sip of tea, and my gaze drifted over my hooves; so alien and yet now so familiar, just like sitting on my haunches, or the swivel of my ears when somepony spoke, or the flick of my tail when I was anxious. I had an adoptive world now that I didn't have to fear inside an adoptive body that started to make sense. My mind still roiled in indecision as to how I felt about it.

I looked up when I heard a rush of wind. Rainbow Dash hovered just inside the door. "Hey, all, I'm back."

"Already?" Applejack said. "Though ya were gonna fly with the Wonderbolts."

"I did!" Rainbow grabbed an unused cushion from the corner of the room and tossed it towards an empty spot near Applejack. "We didn't have to go far." She zipped across the room and landed on her haunches a split second after the cushion hit the floor. "Looked like Buggy McUgly had a teleport circle set up just outside of town."

Applejack raised an eyebrow. "Should I be worried 'bout that?"

"No, it makes sense," said Twilight. "She likely set it up earlier to allow her changeling infiltrator to travel quickly between the badlands and here. I'll check it out myself later and make sure it didn't lead anywhere else before dispelling it."

"I told Shining Armor about it," said Rainbow. "He sent some guards to keep an eye on it. So what'd I miss?"

"Nothing yet," said Twilight. She trotted over to me. "I was going to ask about Candy's friend." She turned to me and added in a soft voice. "If you feel you can. If it's too hard for you right now, I'll understand."

I shook my head and lowered my cup. "It won't get any easier for awhile yet, Twilight," I said in a slightly quavering voice. "She was my best friend. I guess she was really my only friend. We'd been friends since I was a little girl. I turned to her after my mother's death, and she really helped me deal with it. At least as much as she could."

I paused and took a deep breath when my throat became tight at the memory of that time. "A-anyway ... I ... I gave her that pendant. It was supposed to symbolize our friendship. She knew it was just a cheap piece of costume jewelry ... well, that's what I thought it was at the time ... but she also knew it meant a great deal to me. She almost didn't accept it, but she did."

The feared lingering resentment towards Michelle never came, and memories flowed more easily and less painfully. Even when Rainbow spoke up, it didn't trigger tears. "So that's what you meant! You told me in the hospital it had something to do with a close friendship."

I nodded. "Yes, that's right."

Rainbow rubbed her mane. "I'm really sorry about the hard time I gave you over that pendant."

"No, it's okay, you didn't know. Anyway, some years later, she started helping rehabilitate those who were abusing drugs. Um, not sure if you have that sort of problem here."

"Not often, but it can happen," Twilight said.

"An' that was a mighty fine callin' fer yer friend," Applejack said. "I can't imagine that bein' an easy thing to do."

I smiled faintly. "I kinda thought she was crazy at the time, but she was always very kindhearted." I turned my gaze towards Fluttershy. "Very much like you."

Fluttershy smiled, her eyes glistening. "Aw, thank you. Now I understand why you reacted to me like you did at first. I didn't realize I reminded you so much of your friend."

My smile widened slightly. "Anyway, I sort of fell out of touch with her for a bit. I was struggling to get my head back into school work. Then I heard a rumor that she thought I was doing drugs." My smile faded, and I shivered. Rarity lay a hoof on my shoulder. "Then there was the day I couldn't reach her. I finally headed to her apartment and ... a-and when I entered, I s-saw myself. The changeling."

Rarity uttered a soft sigh. "Candy, I'm so sorry."

I shook my head and blinked a few times. My eyes misted, but I didn't cry. I had shed enough tears for a lifetime. "She must have disguised herself, made her think it was me, and then ... well, you know most of the rest." I scraped a fore-hoof on the floor, and I clenched my teeth for a moment. "That thing made me think my friend was the one on drugs. She asked me to take the pendant with her dying breath, which is how I got it back."

"I do not know if this will help or not," said Luna. "But the only way that changeling could have done what it did was if your friend had truly loved you."

I swallowed hard. I lost my battle, and a single tear trickled down my cheek. For as long as I had thought I didn't deserve friends because of how horribly I had failed Michelle, even knowing that I was not at fault, I still struggled to completely shed myself of a feeling that had ruled my life. Yet when Rarity drew me into a hug, and I could accept it without hesitation or drawing away, I knew I had made a good start. I smiled. "It does, Princess," I said in a soft voice.

"Twi, ya figger out yet how Chrysalis affected Candy?" Applejack said.

Twilight gave me a soft smile before she turned away from me. "I have a theory. All magical energy has a natural resonance. I had tuned the detection spell to the particular resonance used by changeling mind magic. It's possible Chrysalis managed to re-tune her magic to use a different resonance. It wouldn't be nearly as efficient, and she would have to use it in short, weaker bursts, but it's possible."

"Yes, that must be what happened," I said. "Several times I felt like I had fuzzed-out, but I thought I was just emotionally overwrought at the time."

"But however did Chrysalis accomplish such a thing?" said Rarity. "She doesn't strike me as, well, subtle enough to come up with something like that."

"I think it was the changeling who disguised itself as Strong Wing," said Twilight. "Did anypony notice something unusual about it?"

"Other than that scar 'cross one eye?" Applejack said.

"Other than it was more ugly than usual?" Rainbow added.

"Wait, I know!" piped Pinkie. She stretched her fore-hooves to either side and tilted her head up as if looking at something tall, at least until she fell over backwards. "It was biiiiig!"

"Yes, exactly," said Twilight. "Well, not quite that big, but at least bigger than the drones at the wedding. And bigger than the drone the real Strong Wing chased."

So that was not the normal size for a changeling? I had no idea.

"At least it went down like a normal changeling when I hit it," Rainbow said.

"I mentioned that day in the hospital that we know so little about the changelings," said Twilight as she resumed pacing. "They may indeed have more specialized classes of drones. This changeling was obviously quite versed in magic if it could use such a sophisticated memory suppression spell against Candy, and it had ample opportunity after infiltrating the castle to figure out how the detection spell operated and find a way to work around it."

Applejack frowned. "Ya seein' the same problem I am, sugarcube?"

Twilight sighed. "That there's another changeling out there somewhere? Yes."

"Wait, what?!" Rainbow said. She leapt into the air and hovered. "Where?!"

"Well, not in the castle," said Twilight. "Shining Armor has scanned all the remaining guards. Most likely it's in one of the wooded areas near Ponyville. Shining and a contingent of guards will be conducting a thorough search, if for no other reason than to find the real Strong Wing."

I shivered. I almost lifted my hoof to a pendant that no longer hung from my neck.

Applejack sighed. "I gotta admit, much as I'm mighty glad Candy here is safe, Discord sure as hay left us a right mess."

"Applejack, if you don't mind me asking," I said. "You said earlier you knew he was up to something. How did you know?"

She smiled. "Thank Twi and her magic fer that."

"It was the changeling detection spell I scanned you with, Candy, back in your first night in the castle," said Twilight, looking pleased. "The dots are color-coded to the type of magic it finds in you. Purple for unicorn magic, blue for pegasus magic, and yellow for earth magic."

Pinkie giggled. "Except mine. Mine were all pink!"

"And alicorns would be a mix of all three," said Twilight. "Yours were purple like I expected, but the little bit of red indicated chaos magic. Likely residual magic from the spell Discord used to transform you into a pony and transport you to Equestria. And, well, there were the hints he gave us."

"Hints?" I asked. "He talked to you about me?"

"He, ah, dropped in unexpectedly on our meeting the other night."

"Wait, was that the explanation for the, well, odd things I saw?"

"Took me hours to clean up all that flour," Spike muttered, frowning.

Rarity groaned. "Ugh, I still get the shivers thinking about that night. That horrible outfit was too evil even by Discord's standards."

"Um, he did try to help us, though," said Fluttershy. "And he really didn't lie to us. And, well, the little plushie was cute."

"He's still up ta somethin'," Applejack grumbled. "Otherwise he'd be here gloatin' over the whole thing."

Rarity leaned forward and looked at Fluttershy. "Had he ever mentioned anything more to you about this, darling?"

"No, he hasn't," Fluttershy said. "But we're going to have a long talk about this the next time he shows up for tea."

I had no idea how I felt about Discord. I could not let go of the anger so easily, even when I preferred being a live pony over a dead human.

"One thing you should ask him, Fluttershy," said Twilight. "Is if he can return Candy to her own world and her own body."

Fluttershy's pupils shrank slightly, and she glanced at me. "Um, okay, I can ask him."

"One would imagine he could," said Celestia. "Considering he appears able to travel between the two worlds at will."

"Unless he's in this with the bug queen from the start," Rainbow grumbled.

"Unlikely," said Luna. "That would not be fitting with Discord's style."

"Seemed ta suit 'im with Tirek," said Applejack.

"Unlike Tirek, I doubt Chrysalis could offer Discord anything he could possibly want."

Rarity turned her head towards her friend. "Fluttershy, are you okay?"

Fluttershy's gaze had dropped. "Um ... yes ... just ... if Candy had to go back, I'd ... I'd miss her."

My heart lurched.

"Well, I would certainly miss her as well," Rarity said in a soft voice. "But we cannot keep her here if she would rather be back home."

That word again: home. What did it really mean? Did I even have one? Earth was not a home, it was a world that happened to be where I was born. My aunt's place, where I had been staying before I ran off after Michelle's death, had been a shelter, not a home. The last place I could call home stopped being such when my mother died.

I looked around. Was the castle a home? Where I had spent most of my time scared or worried, I could hardly call it that, even as nice as it was.

I glanced at Rarity. She had offered me someplace to call home. Could I accept that? Did I deserve ... no, scratch that. That had been answered already. It all came down to what I wanted.

"Given enough time and research," said Twilight. "I might be able to discern how to open a portal between our world and hers, but I would have no idea how to transform her back to her original body. Discord would appear to be her only hope of returning."

I uttered a soft sigh. I remembered the morning spent with Rarity, perhaps some of the happiest moments I had for some time. With the pall of worry over my fate lifted, I saw the past few days in a new light. Yes, Equestria still defied explanation sometimes, but I supposed like anything else I could learn.

I looked down at my hooves. Part of me still yearned to be human again. My dreams, despite the emotional maelstrom they had sparked, were comforting on some level. I still felt like I belonged in that old body.

"I think we're all fergettin' somethin'," said Applejack. "We're not askin' Candy what she thinks."

My head jerked up. "Huh? I'm sorry?"

"You're right, Applejack," said Twilight. She turned to me. "Candy? Do you want to go home?"

I stared at her for a long moment. My eyes darted around the room. My gaze met that of Rarity and then Fluttershy. I looked at Applejack, who gave me a soft smile. Was she doing that again? Was she somehow looking into my head and reading my intentions? Or was it just my damn expressive pony ears again?

"I ... I don't know."

Nopony spoke, as if they knew I had more to say.

"I can't say my life back on my world was great," I began. "It wasn't. Some of that was my own fault. I didn't let anypo ... anyone get close to me after my mother's death, except for my one friend. I thought I didn't need anyone else. And then when she died, I thought I didn't deserve any more friends."

Fluttershy touched a hoof to my shoulder. "Oh, Candy, please, don't think--"

"No, please, Fluttershy, it's okay." I gave her a faint smile. "That's what I used to think. I mean, yes, it's still a struggle to throw it off completely, but at least I want to now. I don't know yet where I want to go with my life, or in which world. At least ... at least no matter what I decide, I'll try not to push others away. I'll at least try to make friends." I sighed and rolled my eyes. "I'm sorry, I know that sounds sappy, I just--"

Rarity and Fluttershy converged on me, hugging me between them. I let out a ragged sigh, my eyes tearing as I threw my forelegs around them and hugged them back. I heard a sniffle and blinked my eyes clear enough to see Pinkie Pie giving me a huge smile, her own eyes watery.

"Candy, please, listen to me," said Rarity after we broke off the embrace. "If you ever have doubts again, please, come to me. Or any of us. We'll be happy to help."

"Yes, please, Candy," said Fluttershy. "Don't ever shut anypony out. Please promise us."

"I won't," I said, sniffling once. "I promise."

"Aww, th-this is so sweet," Pinkie said in a quavering voice.

Rainbow's lips had twitched into a smile, and she swiped one eye with a hoof. She caught several ponies looking at her. "What? I just had something in my eye, that's all! Not like I get all sappy like the rest of you."

Celestia giggled softly.

I caught a strange, soft, pulsing glow out of the corner of my eye. My jaw dropped as I looked at Fluttershy's cutie mark. "F-Fluttershy, what ...?!"

Fluttershy looked at me curiously, then saw where my gaze was pointed. "Oh!"

"Yes, mine as well!" Rarity said in a joyous voice.

Both Fluttershy's and Rarity's cutie marks glowed in a soft pulsing pattern. "What does that--?" I started, but was cut off when both ponies hugged me again.

"It means you're going to keep your promise," Fluttershy said.

"I don't understand," I said.

Twilight smiled. "It means that's what the Cutie Map had summoned them to do, Candy, to help you realize you didn't have to be alone anymore. You don't have to stop making friends."

For a few moments, I simply stared at her, not so much at what she said as how my own feelings towards the concept had so radically shifted. Had this been but a day ago, I would have seized on it as proof that this had been no more than an assigned task. Instead, I took it as a sign that perhaps I had reached a turning point in my life; only time would tell what I actually did with it.

"That's good, considering it looks like I'll be staying in Equestria for awhile," I said. Out of the corner of my eye, I caught Luna lifting her teacup with her magic. "But, in that case, can I ask one favor?"

"Anythin' ya need, sugarcube," said Applejack. "What is it?"

"Will somepony please teach me how to use my horn?"

The other ponies laughed, and I chuckled along with them. Twilight trotted forward. "Well, with the summit over, I think I'll have some time to--"

"Ahem," said Rarity. "While it is true you're more accomplished than most at magic, I believe that responsibility should fall to me. After all, I am fostering her."

I turned towards her, my eyes wide. "Rarity, are you still going to ...?"

"Well, of course, I am," Rarity said, smiling. By now the glow of her cutie mark had faded. "Just because the Map says I'm done doesn't mean I'm simply going to trot away and forget you. Mind you, I fully intend to put you to work in the boutique. It will be a good way for you to practice with your horn anyway."

I smiled, though it was slightly bittersweet. The memory of my mother still haunted me, and likely would for some time to come, but I could not let that hold me back. My guilt over Michelle had done that all too well. It would have to be as I had said earlier, that Rarity would be more a big sister rather than a mother. Still, it was more than I had when I first came to this world.

"I'd love to help out in the boutique," I said with a smile.

"Candy?" Fluttershy said. "I know you'll be spending a lot of time with Rarity, but, please, stop by my place now and then?"

"Of course I will," I said. "I mean ... that's what friends do, right?"

Fluttershy smiled.

Rarity turned to Twilight. "Naturally, if Candy does prefer to learn advanced magic, she is more than welcome to seek out your advice like Sweetie Belle has."

"I would be more than happy to teach her," said Twilight as she headed back to her cushion. She picked up her teacup in her magic. Her horn glowed brighter for a moment, and soon steam once more wafted from the cup.

Really, I would be happy just to be able to move stuff around. I had no immediate desire for anything more advanced than that. Despite being in a magical world, I did not see myself becoming a mage anytime soon.

Well, okay, that spell Twilight used to reheat her tea was kind of cool, but still ...

Celestia set down her own now empty teacup. "I am truly happy this has all worked out. But before my sister and I depart for Canterlot, I believe Twilight had something she wished to talk to us about."

Twilight sighed and gazed down into her cup, looking a bit like I had felt in the dining hall right before Luna had arrived.

"I do hope this is an explanation for why we were shut out of the summit preparations at first," said Rarity, lifting her muzzle in the air. "I was not at all satisfied with the explanation -- if you could call it as such -- that you gave us earlier."

Applejack frowned slightly. "That's kinda harsh, doncha think?"

"No, she's right, Applejack," said Twilight in a somber voice. She lifted her gaze to Celestia. "I must apologize to you as well, Princess. I failed you."

"Please, Twilight, do not judge yourself so harshly," said Celestia. "Tell us what you feel you need to reveal first."

"Was Chrysalis right?" Applejack asked in a gentle voice. "All that stuff she said 'bout how you really feel about her?"

Twilight sighed. "Yes, she was. I do hate her."

"I toldya!" Rainbow said. "Who wouldn't hate her for what she did to Shining Armor?"

"That's not the reason I hate her, Rainbow."

Rainbow blinked and settled on her haunches. "Um ... it's not?"

Twilight took a sip of her tea. "I hate her because, back at the wedding, she made me hate all of you."

"Oh, goodness," Fluttershy breathed.

Spike gasped, his eyes wide. "Twilight, you never told me!"

Twilight hung her head. "It's not something I'm proud of, Spike." She lifted her head, her subdued gaze drifting over her friends. "It was when you didn't believe me when I told you something was wrong with Cadance. After Chrysalis sent me into the caverns below Canterlot, just for a brief moment while I sat in the darkness, I hated all of you."

I tried to piece together what had happened as I listened. I remembered wondering earlier if Chrysalis had done something to warrant becoming common nightmare fodder. I supposed I had my answer.

"Twilight," Rainbow said in a contrite voice. "Really, we're sorry we ever--"

Twilight held up a hoof. "Please, it's okay, you don't need to apologize. None of you do. I've long since forgiven all of you for that. That hate was barely a flicker. I knew I was simply distraught and frightened over what happened, but that I felt it at all ... bothered me. A lot. I-I didn't want it to ever happen again."

Applejack stepped over to her and placed a hoof on her shoulder. "Didja really think Chrysalis would do somethin' to make us not believe ya again?" she asked in a soft voice.

Twilight sighed. "I know, it sounds foolish to me now, too. I wasn't thinking." She peered down into her tea. "The other day, I had a talk with Fluttershy about the wedding, right after I had an argument with Rainbow. Maybe she was right. Maybe I do have some lingering resentments, despite how unbecoming that is for a Princess of Friendship."

Twilight's demeanor exuded a pain all too familiar to me. These ponies were not all that different from me after all. As much as I sympathized with Twilight, I drew some comfort from that thought.

"Twilight Sparkle," Celestia said in a low but firm voice.

Twilight swallowed hard and looked up.

"Do not be too hard on yourself," Celestia said softly. "You are not expected to be perfect just because you have earned a title. You cannot expect yourself to stop feeling the way you do."

"And, truly, Chrysalis had done nothing to endear herself to you," said Luna. "All things considered, you handled yourself as well as could be expected."

"One more thing," said Celestia. She rose to her hooves and stepped over to Twilight. "Just because you are the one who has the title, that does not mean you need to do everything yourself."

Twilight slowly smiled and nodded. "I understand, Princess." She turned to the others. "I'm sorry, everypony. I should have talked to you all about how I felt. I'm glad you all insisted on being there when the summit started."

Rarity smiled. "And I am sorry as well for getting a little heated with you at our meeting earlier."

"We all are, Twilight," said Fluttershy.

"Hey, it all worked out in the end," said Applejack. "That's what matters."

Pinkie suddenly bounced between Twilight, Applejack, and Celestia and pulled them together with a joyous cry of "Group hug!" How she did that with only two forelegs, I had no idea.

Twilight smiled as the other ponies trotted over and joined in a show of spontaneous affection that, despite everything I had learned about them in the last day or so, left me speechless. Had I isolated myself for so long that such a thing would seem so alien to me? I uttered a faint sigh. Despite how far I felt I had come, I still had a lot to learn.

Pinkie turned her head towards me. "Well, what are you waiting for, you silly filly?"

I blushed faintly, but my lips twitched into a small smile. I actually did feel a little silly, to be honest, but I trotted over to them just the same. I almost flinched in surprise when Twilight turned and hugged me first.

"That's for trusting me with your beloved pendant," Twilight said. "I'll take good care of it, I promise."

"I know you will, Twilight," I said, smiling. "Thank you."

My gaze fell upon the pendant as it gleamed in the afternoon light. What was it, really? Why did it draw attention to me in the alley? Why did it not want to part from me? Did it have anything to do with whatever entity Luna said had helped me in my dreams? I hoped Twilight could find the answers for me, as I burned to know.

Spike stepped up to me. "So, um, Candy? I was wondering. Did that trip to the library help at all?"

"Yes, Spike," I said. I glanced at Luna, who smiled at me. "It was very ... enlightening."

His eyes lit up. "Really?"

"I learned something very basic." I grinned. "You might even say something very elemental."

Spike slapped his claw against his forehead. "No offense, Candy, but that was a groaner."

I giggled. Luna chuckled as well.

Spike smiled. "I can't take full credit for it, though. It was, um, sorta another pony's idea."

His eyes flicked to the side. I followed his gaze and gasped. "W-wait ... that was your idea?!"

Princess Celestia smiled. "When you mentioned on the balcony earlier this morning how well you got along with Spike, I thought it best he help gently steer you in the right direction. Or more accurately, give you the opportunity to steer yourself."

"Don't look so shocked, Candy," said Luna in response to my open-mouthed stare. "My sister is like that sometimes. You'll get used to it."

The other ponies chuckled. I smiled, but the same question arose in my mind again: did I want to stay? How long would it take before I simply became so used to this world that it no longer mattered if I went back? No, I had to have something more concrete. I didn't want to simply exist. That's all I had done on Earth the past few years. If I were to stay in Equestria, I needed something more. I needed a purpose.

"As enjoyable as this has been," said Rarity. "I ought to be taking my leave. I need to pick up Sweetie Belle at the schoolhouse."

"An' I need to fetch Apple Bloom," said Applejack. "Miss Cheerliee was mighty nice 'bout keepin' an' eye on 'em after school so we could attend this here summit, but they're prob'ly drivin' the poor mare nuts right 'bout now."

Rarity turned to me. "Candy, you're welcome to come home with me tonight if you wish."

I blinked. "But ... I thought that challenge to your application ..."

Twilight stepped forward. "Officially, I still have custody of you, Candy, so I can approve of you going with Rarity. You do look rather tired, though, so you're welcome to spend another night in the castle if you want."

Only then did I realize how much my ears drooped. Even my tail felt limp. Whatever had sustained me, be it adrenaline or sheer force of will, now left my body aching and my eyelids heavy. I would need a nap just to have enough energy for dinner. "I think I do want to stay another night."

"May I pick you up in the morning, then?" Rarity asked.

So could I handle another day in the body of a little unicorn pony with day-glo hair in a bizarre magical world? Could I deal with a day where I didn't have to watch everything I did or send every word I said through a mental censor? Would I be able to handle the idea that I actually had friends I could go to if I had a problem?

"Yes, please." I smiled. "I'm looking forward to it."

~~~ END OF PART ONE ~~~

Author's Note

Thank you all, for reading this far and for all the comments, both accolades and criticism! Updates will now be on a three week break as I hammer out the details for the rest of the story (yeah, I know I said two weeks originally, but I forgot I have family obligations coming up near the end of the month). Updates will resume on March 28th, and I will be back to an every-fouth-day update schedule. Things to look forward to:

The true origin and purpose of the pendant
Candy meets Discord
Hijinks, drama, and mayhem
Cutie Mark Crusaders, YAY! (who totally won't drive Rachel nuts, honest )

Chapter 19 - Should I Be Worried?

I took a few deep breaths to further calm my pounding heart without tearing my gaze from the single silvery object that had become my focus. My non-native ancestry thwarted my ability to attain any further serenity; I was trying to do something no one in my own world had ever done before.

I heard a gentle clop of hooves behind me. "Now, my dear, you almost had it," came Rarity's encouraging voice. "You can properly envision and hold it. Now you need to convince yourself you can move it."

Rarity had chosen a fork as the subject of my first attempt at levitation (well, technically my second attempt; the first attempt was ... less than successful). Was this a subtle hint that she wanted my table manners to improve before I lived with her? I could have been reading too much into it. We had just finished breakfast at the castle, and this happened to be an unused utensil. I still needed to stand down from the ragged edge of paranoia in which I had lived for the past few days.

I caught a glimmer of gold out of the corner of my eye as light gleamed from the pendant around Twilight's neck. Twilight had suggested I try this before I left the castle, claiming she wanted to ensure that the residual chaos magic didn't interfere with my abilities. I think she simply wanted the chance to jump in if I needed help.

I narrowed my eyes and concentrated. The rush of energy suffusing my horn filled me with the same sense of eager anticipation as it had moments before. I caught Spike cringing out of the corner of my eye. During my first attempt, I had nearly clipped the poor dragon's head and embedded the fork in the wall while still learning how to properly channel magic into my horn.

A pale blue glow enveloped the fork. This time the sensation of holding it simply with my will felt less alien. I still struggled to banish the false analogy of gripping it in a hand, as that likely had thwarted my previous attempt.

Okay, now ... lift.

I gasped as the fork shot up like a rocket until I mentally clamped down on it, freezing it in mid-air about a pony-length above my head. I heard Twilight and Rarity chuckle. I blushed, thinking it directed at me, until I heard Spike's muffled voice, "Hey, I'm just, um, cleaning under the table! Yeah, that's it! I wasn't terrified at all that she might poke my eye out."

"You need a more gentle touch, Candy, but otherwise you're doing better," said Rarity. "Try setting it down on the table."

"I'll just keep cleaning under here until she's done," Spike called out.

I giggled, and my chest no longer felt so tight, though my heart still raced. This was magic -- actual magic -- something so common in this world yet still quite extraordinary to me. I could not have conveyed my elation.

When I almost dropped the fork, it tempered my celebration. I had envisioned too many nuances of this power at once rather than letting it flow naturally. It reminded me how I still needed to let things go. I still had many old patterns of thought to dismantle.

Sometimes things really were as simple as they seemed.

With a more relaxed breath, I lowered the fork the remaining distance, and it made nary a sound as it touched down upon the table.

"Very good, Candy," Rarity said.

"I think you're starting to get it," Twilight said, smiling.

Spike's eyes peeked above the edge of the table, and the rest of him popped up a moment later. He smiled and offered me a thumb's up. "I knew you could do it!"

I giggled. "Thanks, all."

Twilight turned to Rarity. "So will you be taking Candy straight to the boutique this morning?"

Rarity stepped off her chair. "Yes, indeed. I need to finish a dress before lunch, and Candy should get in as much practice as possible with her magic now that she has the basics down."

"Do you need to take Sweetie Belle to school?" I asked.

"She'll be going by herself. Mayor Mare has lifted the restrictions concerning that."

"But I thought there's still another changeling out there. She's not worried that it might be in the town?"

Twilight smiled. "Shining Armor is taking care of that now."

"Did he find the other changeling, then?" said Rarity.

"No, but he can at least assure everypony there are no more changelings in Ponyville itself," said Twilight. "Before breakfast, we put our heads together and figured out how to use his shielding magic to cast my detection spell over a wider area. He's off doing a final sweep in town now."

My gaze drifted to the pendant. As much of a burden it had become, it was also a fixture, and guilt still tugged at me for leaving it behind. I still felt that the separation would be good for me, letting me focus on my new life, whatever it eventually turned out to be. Finally having had a night free of dreams about Michelle or the pendant gave me some hope.

"What of Strong Wing?" Rarity asked.

My ears flattened. I had to remind myself they were speaking of the real one.

Twilight sighed. "We haven't found him yet, and Shining Armor has to head back to the Crystal Empire soon. I'm getting a little worried, especially in light of what happened to Candy's friend."

I shuddered. I felt bad enough that the pendant had been indirectly responsible for one death, even if I had managed to shed the guilt.

"Surely you don't believe ...?" Rarity began, her pupils shrinking as she tried to voice what I had just been thinking.

"I'm not sure what's going on," said Twilight. "The more I go over in my head what happened over the last few days, the more things don't add up. This is the first time we've heard about a changeling actually draining somepony to the point of death." Twilight glanced at me. "Candy, if that brings up bad memories, I could defer this for now."

"No, don't," I said in a firm if quavering voice. "I want to hear this. I want to understand as much as I can as to ... as to why she died."

Rarity touched a hoof to my shoulder before turning to Twilight. "Though you said yourself we know so little about them."

"Yes, but Chrysalis seemed adamant about denying it."

"Well, of course. A miscreant always tries to cover up her misdeeds."

"There's something else," said Twilight. "Candy, the changeling disguised as Strong Wing had tried to use its power on you, didn't it?"

"Oh, um, yes," I said, my ears drooping. "He tried to convince me I should listen to Chrysalis right when I first started to doubt her."

"And then he lied about the nature of your meeting with Chrysalis when he talked to Shining Armor."

"What are you getting at, Twilight?" Rarity asked in a curious voice.

Twilight looked thoughtful. "The changeling had obviously found a way to circumvent the spell I crafted to sense their mind magicks. Why didn't it use its power on the other guards so they would back up its story to my brother?"

Rarity smiled gently. "I really believe you're over-thinking this."

But didn't Twilight have a point? Why didn't the changeling cover its bases?

I shivered as the memory of the apartment plagued me. Had I just imagined seeing a cold and calculating intelligence to those alien insect-like eyes? It had been no different when I confronted it after the memory block had fallen away; I had seen the same ruthless, even meticulous, manipulator.

"My advice, darling, would be to focus on the pendant," said Rarity. "After all, you have only a month or so."

The mention of the pendant jolted me out of my reverie.

"I intend to," said Twilight. "Chrysalis had obviously intended to use it to forcefully absorb emotional energy from others, which gives me an important clue as to its original purpose and ... um ... wait, what did you mean by only a month?"

"Why, the Grand Galloping Gala, of course," said Rarity. "Certainly you'll want to find a way to break the binding magic by then. The gold of that pendant will clash horribly with many of your outfits."

Spike chuckled, and I smiled. The mention of this "Gala" piqued my curiosity, but it could wait until later.

"Um, right," said Twilight in a dubious voice, though she did smile faintly.

Rarity turned towards me. "Come along, Candy. It's time we head down to the boutique and get you settled in."

Despite my lighter mood, my heart still fluttered a bit as I hopped off the chair and alighted on my hooves. I still had yet to completely shift myself out of the mindset of wariness and caution that had become so ingrained in me since arriving in Equestria. I needed to let other ponies worry about things for awhile. I needed to get back to being just an ordinary teenager.

Whatever that really meant in this world.

"Candy, could you come out here for a moment, please?"

The scraps of fabric I had so carefully folded with my hooves trembled in my tiring magical grip. Some of the corners had sprung loose and dangled over the sides of what had been a neat stack. I uttered a small sigh before calling back, "I'll be there in a minute!"

A dull headache lurked just under my horn, growing slowly worse the longer I kept pumping magic through it. I had been warned to recognize that as the first sign I was overdoing it, but I had almost completed this task of organizing Rarity's scrap pile. She kept some of the detritus generated by her work for use in patches, practice, or experimentation. A more magically skilled pony would have had this tedious task done inside an hour. It had taken me most of the day.

Admittedly, I had worked the task on and off, so the entire day had not been filled with tedium. I got to watch Rarity work again, and we had a nice lunch with Fluttershy.

The bundle shook again and threatened to come completely undone. Discomfort overcame stubbornness, and I lowered it to the table, rubbing my head as I let the magic dissipate. I glanced out the window, surprised at how low the sun lay. After a march of days that had crawled by with all the speed of a snail through molasses, I had almost forgotten what the passage of time felt like.

I trotted towards the front of the shop. "Sorry for the wait." I glanced to the side where Rarity had placed the dress order she had due that day. The hanger stood empty. "Oh, was the dress picked up, then?"

Rarity smiled. "Yes, and she was quite pleased with it. Even though I had to rush a bit at the end, it turned out well."

I flicked my gaze to the side. "Er, yeah ... sorry about that."

"Don't trouble yourself over it, dear. It was I who perhaps had a bit of misplaced confidence in your ability."

Rarity had made the mistake of trusting my nascent magical skill to something sharp. Rather than placing the pair of scissors on her table, I had plunged the point through the cloth of the dress she had been working on. Fortunately, it was a paneled dress, and she needed only to redo the panel.

"I need to head over to Town Hall," said Rarity. "I wish to check on the status of my application to foster you."

The knot in my stomach reminded me how I could not simply flip my feelings on and off like a light switch, as much as I would have liked. While I very much wanted this to go through, I still could not shake the feeling that I had caused her a lot of trouble. "Is there anything I can do to help?"

Rarity smiled. "Please, don't worry yourself about it. Let me handle it."

"Could you at least tell me what the reasons for the challenge are?"

"It's not important. Really, Candy, the fact that you're here under my roof you can take as assurance that it's inevitable that this will go through."

I smiled faintly. I had become so used to relying on nopony but myself for so long that I had forgotten how to relinquish control. I had a chance to go back to enjoying what was left of my childhood. I should be seizing the opportunity rather than finding things to worry about.

"Now, I don't expect any more customers today, but I would appreciate you keeping an eye on the boutique while I'm gone," said Rarity.

"Of course."

She narrowed her eyes. "And no more magic practice for you today, young lady."

I blinked. "Huh?"

"I can tell you're in a bit of pain. Don't overdo it again, please."

I blushed faintly. "How did you know?"

"You forget, I had to deal with the same thing while Sweetie Belle learned magic."

My heart lurched. Had she already fallen into a motherly role with me? No, I meant big sister role. That's what she had to be for me. Nopony ... no one ... could replace my mother. Even Rarity had agreed with that assessment.

"I won't be gone long," said Rarity as she turned away. Had my feelings shown on my face again? I couldn't tell. I didn't trust my voice and remained silent while she headed out of the boutique.

I trotted over to a window and leaned my fore-hooves on the windowsill, looking out over Ponyville. With the intimidating presence of the guards now gone, the country charm of this town had returned. I had lost track of how many ponies had greeted me both on the way to the boutique that morning or while we were out to lunch.

I really had to get used to that. Maybe my fellow New Yorkers back in my world had gained a reputation for being cold and harsh that was not entirely true, but they definitely tended not to be quite as openly friendly. I wondered if Manehattanites were similar.

I idly flicked my tail as I pony-watched, occasionally glancing to the side to catch anypony approaching the front door of the boutique. So how would I fit in here? Was it enough to just go with the flow for now? Where events of the past few days had carried me forward like so many leaves on the rapids, I felt I needed to take more control. I just had no idea how.

I flinched when I heard the door open without warning. I turned from the window, my hooves landing with a sharp clop as a magical glow that was not my own faded from the door after it had closed.

"Hello! You must be Candy Swirl!"

My gaze shifted down towards the source of the high-pitched voice. A little marshmallow-white unicorn filly with a curly pink and purple mane smiled up at me, a saddlebag draped across her barrel.

"Oh, um, yeah, that's me," I said. "And you are ...?"

"I'm Sweetie Belle."

For some odd reason, I had pictured her being older. She couldn't have been more than ten or eleven. I again had dreaded visions of becoming an impromptu foalsitter. "Um, hi. If you're looking for your sister, she'll be back a bit later."

"Oh, that's okay. I really wanted to meet you anyway. This'll give us lots of time to get to know each other!"

I smiled faintly. "Sure. Great."

Sweetie turned away and trotted towards the stairs. "So, you get settled in yet?"

Was I supposed to follow her? I glanced out the window and saw no ponies coming to the door. I cantered to catch up with her. "Oh, well, I've moved into the guest room, if that's what you mean." Since all I possessed in this world was a saddlebag and a borrowed copy of a Daring Do novel, I didn't have a lot of baggage to unload, but she didn't need to hear that much detail.

"Hmm. Good choice on Rarity's part," Sweetie said as we reached the upstairs hall. "I kinda like having my own room." She stopped outside said room and levitated the saddle bag off her barrel and tossed it on the bed. Several textbooks and notebooks spilled out.

Damn, the little kid had better control over her magic than I did. "Um, just because I'm curious, Sweetie, how much do you know about me?"

She turned to face me and smiled. "Rarity said you're from Manehattan and don't remember a lot of your recent past. And that you had some sort of powerful magical pendant that Twilight was keeping an eye on for you. And at school today, Scootaloo said that she heard you bravely and single-hoofedly stopped the changelings from stealing it!"

I stared. "Wait, what? Um, I don't think that's quite the whole story ..."

Sweetie's smile widened. "And you don't have a cutie mark yet!"

Was it me, or did she say that last part with ... unwarranted enthusiasm?

She obviously had old information about me (not to mention embellished). I debated whether to tell her or let Rarity handle it. I had no idea how a little kid would react to knowing she was living under the same roof with an alien.

"So what are you doing tomorrow afternoon, Candy?" Sweetie asked.

The sudden change of topic threw me for a second. "Working in the boutique, I guess. I, um, need more practice with my magic."

"Do you think Rarity might let you go in the afternoon sometime?"

"Maybe. Why?"

"Because my fellow Crusaders really want to meet you!"

"Er ... Crusaders?" The term sounded vaguely familiar.

"Yeah, we would've had you come over today, but Apple Bloom got a letter from her cousin Babs Seed," Sweetie said. "Babs got her cutie mark, and, well, Apple Bloom kinda freaked out a little about whether she'd wind up with a cutie mark she didn't like." Her gaze became subdued for a moment, her ears flattening a bit before she suddenly perked up. "Oh, not that I'm worried about that, of course," she said in an airy voice, waving a hoof.

"I'm really sorry, but I honestly have no idea what you're talking about," I said with a sigh.

Sweetie Belle giggled. "Aw, that's okay." She trotted past me. "Hey, mind if we talk in the kitchen? I'm kinda thirsty."

I followed along behind her. "So what are these, um, Crusaders you mentioned?"

"The Cutie Mark Crusaders. Me, Apple Bloom, and Scootaloo. We all don't have our cutie marks yet, so we get together and come up with ways to earn them."

Well, that certainly sounded tame enough. I supposed it even made sense. If these cutie marks were supposed to be a sign of a skill or ability, how else would a pony attain one unless they tried out different things? "So where do you go to do this?" I asked as we entered the kitchen.

Sweetie levitated a glass onto the table as she opened the fridge door with a hoof. "We have a clubhouse at Sweet Apple Acres we use for our meetings."

As I climbed into a seat at the table, I took a wild guess that "Apple Bloom" was the little yellow filly with the big bow I had seen that first day.

Sweetie's horn glowed as she poured herself some orange juice before trotting over to the table. So this didn't sound so bad. If the clubhouse sat on the farm, they technically had adult supervision nearby. While I was not that enamored of being around a bunch of little kids, it could have been worse. Living with Rarity meant I probably should be accommodating towards Sweetie Belle and make nice with her friends. I did wonder why they would be interested in somepony who had to be at least five or six years older than them.

Well, other than I didn't have a cutie mark.

Okay, now the alarm bells were going off.

"Um, Sweetie?" I asked as she hopped into a chair. "You wanting me to come over to your friends' clubhouse tomorrow ... does this have anything to do with me not having a cutie mark yet?"

Sweetie's pupils shrank. "Not from me! No way! Not me at all!"

I simply tilted my head and gave her a dubious look.

She closed her eyes and lifted a fore-hoof. "I swear, I am not at all interested in helping you attain your cutie mark. I just want you to meet my friends, that's all."

I flicked my tail as I considered. Seeing the farm again while not under duress would be nice, if for no other reason than thanking that big stallion who pulled the cart. I had not been of the mindset to think of doing it that first day.

Besides, I really had to stop being suspicious of everything. These were just kids. I sincerely doubted they were little hoodlums, or budding gang members, or represented some other form of danger to themselves or anypony else.

Sweetie quietly sipped her orange juice as she watched me with hopeful eyes.

"Well, okay," I said. "I'll talk to Rarity later and see if she can spare me tomorrow afternoon."

Sweetie Belle smiled. "Great! I'll tell the others in school tomorrow!"

I heard hooves approaching from the hall. "What will you tell the others tomorrow, Sweetie Belle?" said Rarity in a tired voice as she trotted into the room.

"Oh, um, hi, Rarity!" Sweetie said. "Candy was interested in meeting my friends tomorrow."

More the other way around, but I refrained from correcting her.

Rarity paused and narrowed her gaze. "Indeed?"

Sweetie's pupils shrank again. "That's all I want to do, honest! Just bring her to the clubhouse and have her meet my friends. I just want to be nice to her and all."

Rarity considered for a moment, then sighed. "Very well. How did you do on your exams? You were supposed to get them back today."

Sweetie's gaze slid off to the side. "I did ... okay."

"How okay?"

"Okay okay."

"Sweetie, bring me your exam papers."

Sweetie rolled her eyes and slid off the chair. "Okay, okay," she muttered as she trotted out of the room.

Rarity watched her go before approaching the table. "My apologies. Sweetie Belle is very smart, but she sometimes doesn't apply herself in all her subjects. School is out for the summer after this week, so this is the last chance she had to bring her grades up."

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"Simply annoyed by the bureaucracy, dear, that's all. They insist on going through all the motions on this ridiculous challenge despite how silly its premise. Rest assured, I'll handle it." She glanced towards the hall for a moment. "Now I need to ask you, is Sweetie telling the truth?"

"About what?"

"About her intentions concerning having you meet her fellow Crusaders."

"She told me the same thing she just told you," I said. "That she wants me to meet her friends and that's it."

"Hrm," Rarity murmured.

"Um, should I be worried?"

"I suppose not. Perhaps if you associate with her friends, it will be better for them. They could use a more mature influence, to be honest."

I guessed I was going to be pressed into foalsitting after all. Then again, compared to what I had been through over the past few days, this should be a cakewalk by comparison. "By the way," I said in a low voice. "Sweetie Belle doesn't seem to know about me being from another world."

"On the way back from the castle last night, I asked the others not to reveal that information and instead let you decide whom you wish to tell," said Rarity.

My eyes widened. "Even Applejack agreed to that?"

Rarity smiled. "While she may be the Element of Honesty, that doesn't mean she reveals personal details of other ponies' lives to whomever will listen, dear. In fact ... I would likely practice some discretion for the time being if I were you."

I nodded slowly. I didn't need to be a genius to figure out she wasn't telling me something, and it likely had to do with the challenge to her fostering application. It brought me back to the same concern I had expressed a moment ago which still lacked a satisfactory response: should I be worried?

Chapter 20 - Membership

I am standing in a tiny, unfamiliar kitchen. Canned and boxed food lie in haphazard arrangement upon faded and scratched counter tops of a decor twenty years out of style. Grungy appliances putter and growl as they operate well past their intended lifespans.

I stare down at myself. Human again. I have yet to dream of myself in my pony body. I don't know how to feel about it. My mind still hovers between two worlds; I look like Rachel Darrow but consider my name to be Candy Swirl. The dichotomy confuses me.

I forget my existential dilemma when the swinging door bursts open, and I gasp as Michelle enters. "Michelle!" I cry without regard to whether I might startle the poor girl. "What are you doing here?! I thought after the deal with the pendant you'd ..."

I trail off. She ignores me. Her hands tremble as she empties water into a saucepan from the ancient faucet. She is wearing the same rumpled nightgown as she did in my previous dreams. She looks like she hasn't slept in days. I swallow hard as the pendant around her neck swings about with her frenzied movements.

She sets the water on the stove. It takes several tries for the temperamental striker to light the gas, by which time it erupts into a burst of combustion which makes her flinch.

"I don't understand what this is about," I say, raising my voice as if hoping it would penetrate whatever veil separates me from her perception.

She lifts an arm towards a cabinet and lowers a large ceramic mug to the counter with a bang as if it weighs a ton. I shudder when its appearance tickles a memory. She pulls a container from another cabinet and starts spooning a dark brown powder into the mug, and the faint smell of processed chocolate fills the air.

I remember the mug I found on the floor of the living room and the spilled liquid nearby. I'm seeing Michelle make hot chocolate for me -- or rather, for the THING she thinks is me.

I look towards the door and shiver. If I push it open, would I see it again? To what purpose? To scream at it? To beat my fists upon it? I hate it with a terrible, dark passion, but I am lucid enough to know this is indeed a dream. It would be for naught. I would be venting against my own memories.

Michelle suddenly heaves a ragged sigh, her right hand clutching the pendant. She starts to whisper, forcing me to step forward to hear her properly. "--stop ... it's her ... it has to be her ... sh-she needs my help ..."

She closes her eyes, and the hand holding the pendant trembles. "Just ... j-just get out of my head ... I don't know what you're t-talking about ..."

"Michelle, please, who are you talking to?" I demand. I lift a hand to touch her shoulder, but it's as if an invisible force field surrounds her, like the one Chrysalis summoned at the summit.

Michelle shakes her head violently and forces her hand to unclench and fall to her side. She takes a deep breath, and a small smile comes to her haggard face as the water starts to boil. "She's my friend," she says, grasping the handle of the pan with two hands to keep it steady enough to pour, and even then much splashes over the counter in steaming rivulets. "I love her."

My heart aches, and I hastily wipe my eyes.

She stirs the hot chocolate, takes a deep breath, and cradles it in two hands as she heads for the door.

"Wait, Michelle!" I call out, even though I know it's in vain. She heads through the door and is gone. I swallow hard, my heart pounding. I steel myself for what I am about to see and barrel through the same door. "What--?!"

Instead of the living room, I find myself in a milky, star-filled void. Doors march in odd precession on either side, and no two appear alike.

"Hello, Candy."

I whirl around, and for once I greet the dark blue alicorn princess with a sigh of relief rather than fear. "Princess Luna ... I just ..."

"I am sorry to bring you to me rather than me going to you, but I sensed you were in no great distress." Luna utters a tired sigh. "And it's been a busy night."

"Busy night?"

"Let's just say there are three fillies who worry far too much about their cutie marks."

"Princess?" I ask in a pleading voice. "Do you know what just happened to me?"

"I sensed part of it," says Luna. "You saw your friend again."

"But it makes no sense. It's not a memory."

"Normally I would say that you invented what you believe happened prior to your arrival that night, but I again sensed the same presence that I had when you were struggling to reclaim your memory."

My eyes widen. "But what is it? WHO is it?"

"I do not know. Its energies were far weaker this time."

I remember the plea on my cell phone in that dream before I broke through the block placed on my memory. "Could it be coming from the pendant?"

"That is a possibility, yes," Luna replies.

"But I'm not wearing it anymore. Wouldn't Twilight get these dreams instead?"

"Her dreams were rather active tonight," Luna explains. "I was simply too overtaxed to visit them." She gestures with a wing towards another door. "Unfortunately her dreams have concluded, or I could have connected you with them. I strongly suggest you speak with her today."

"I will, Princess, I promise," I say.

Luna smiles. "Is there anything else I can do before I take my leave?"

"Just one thing." I spread my arms. "Why do I keep appearing like this in my dreams instead of as a pony?"

Luna considers. "It is possible you still do not quite accept your transformation. It is hard to tell. I have not dealt with something of this nature before."

I nod and sigh.

She drapes a wing around me. "You said yourself you are unsure of your future. I feel it is much like attaining a cutie mark: it cannot be rushed. The answer will come to you in time."

I manage a small smile. I think back to what she said earlier and realize the fillies she spoke of are likely Sweetie Belle and her friends. "Do you think those fillies you mentioned took your advice as well?"

Luna sighs. "Concerning ceasing to worry about what cutie marks they get, hopefully. Concerning their eagerness to acquire them ... not so much, I fear."

And Rarity thinks I would be a source of maturity for them when I'm still too anxious for answers myself. I sincerely hope that's not a recipe for disaster ...

"Ugh, don't tell me it's going to rain today!" Sweetie Belle lamented from where she had climbed onto the kitchen counter, her muzzle pressed to the glass. She raised a hoof to straighten her pith helmet when a twitching ear upset it. I had chosen not to speculate on the oddity of her head gear.

As for the weather, I had only vaguely noticed that the world had become gray and subdued with the fading morning light. My focus had been usurped by the fork which floated in my trembling magic. I faced the daunting task of bringing it closer to my mouth without sticking myself in the nose or eye. When Rarity turned her head to look to her sister, I took the opportunity to cheat: I leaned forward and snatched the morsel of food from the tines.

"Sweetie, come back to the table, please, and finish your breakfast," said Rarity. "The pegasi have showers scheduled until only noon. They promised sunshine the rest of the day." She turned back to her breakfast. "And I saw that, Candy."

The fork clattered to the plate as my magic faltered. "Er, what?"

Rarity smiled gently. "But I'll allow it. I don't want you to starve just because you're still learning the finer points of control."

"But how did you ...?"

"Don't try to figure it out, Candy," Sweetie said as she climbed into her chair. "She has eyes in the back of her head or something."

Rarity glanced at her sister. "And take that ridiculous thing off your head."

Sweetie's gaze flicked over to me as I made another attempt to use the fork with magic. "Um ..."

"Wherever did you get that?"

"Pinkie Pie stopped by while you were helping Candy with her mane," Sweetie explained. "She handed me this, said something about Candy having trouble with sharp objects, and left." She glanced over to me. "No offense."

How did Pinkie even know ...?

You know what? Never mind. I decided to take the earlier advice and not waste brainpower trying to figure out how Pinkie operated. I smiled at Sweetie Belle. "None taken. I'm getting better, though."

"In either case, Sweetie, please return to your breakfast," said Rarity. "You don't want to be late for school."

"It's the last day of the semester anyway."

"Oh, is it?" I asked.

Sweetie smiled. "Yep! So now we have the whole summer for crusading!"

Rarity narrowed her eyes slightly. "We?"

"Um, yeah ... Apple Bloom and Scootaloo and me. The three of us. Like always."

Rarity sighed. "You're as transparent as glass. I know your friends are up to something. Please tell me you'll listen to the voice of reason."

Was she referring to me? Wasn't that a huge bet placed on my supposed maturity?

Sweetie spread her fore-hooves. "What? I'm just going to show her the clubhouse and introduce her to my friends. That's all." She paused when Rarity looked dubious. "I'm keeping my promise! Pinkie would've said something if I wasn't."

"Very well." Rarity turned to me. "Speaking of school, I should inquire about getting you enrolled come this fall. Though I imagine you're at high school level now."

"Yeah, that's what I was attending for awhile, um, back home," I said.

"Aw, that's too bad that we won't be going to the same school together," Sweetie Belle said.

I wouldn't have minded some private tutoring in the meantime, if only to learn more about this world, though I supposed I could use Twilight's library for that. "That reminds me, Rarity, I need to go see Twilight sometime today."

"Oh?" Rarity inquired.

"I had a dream that may have had something to do with the pendant again. Princess Luna suggested I talk to her."

At the mention of the princess, Sweetie's pupils shrank slightly.

"Perhaps you can stop over after you've visited with Sweetie's friends. That will give you a solid morning of practice with your magic."

I glanced at Sweetie Belle. Her gaze flicked over to me for a moment, then lowered to her meal. I was sorely tempted to call her out on her own dream, but maybe that was being unfair. I had to trust that this grand meeting with her fellow "Crusaders" would be a non-event.

The showers lingered a bit longer into the afternoon, sunlight only just trickling in as I set out from the boutique. Fluttershy accompanied me, having earlier offered to show me the way back to the farm. I glanced skyward and saw Rainbow Dash breaking up the clouds in a very leisurely manner, leaving one particular puffy white cloud alone.

"I saw Twilight in the marketplace after lunch," said Fluttershy as we trotted towards the farm. "I told her you were interested in seeing her because of your dream."

"So she'll be free later?" I asked.

"She said you could drop by the castle anytime and to bring your saddlebag. I think she wants to send some books home with you."

As the sun shone more in earnest, its light glistened on the greenery lining the road. The fresh aroma rising from the damp foliage and the deep earthy smell of the ground under our hooves had no equal in my memories. My mother had moved us out of our small town when I was very little, so I had almost no recollection of the countryside. Familiarity instead lay with the sights and sounds of the city. Not that this wasn't nice, just ... different. Maybe even a bit alien.

"Candy?"

"Oh, sorry," I said. "Saddlebag. Books. Got it."

Fluttershy gave me a concerned look. "I'm sorry you're still having trouble with dreams about your friend."

I shook my head. "It's okay. This was nowhere near as bad."

"Do you need to talk about it?" Fluttershy asked.

I wanted to keep my promise about not shutting anypony out, but what more could I say? The dream had not disturbed me quite in the way that perhaps Fluttershy thought. I had made a sort of peace with Michelle's passing. An uneasy one, perhaps, but it let me cope. "Let me see what Twilight has to say about it first."

Was that a cop-out? I did intend to talk to Twilight later, and the subject of Michelle would have to come up. Maybe I should go visit Fluttershy afterward anyway.

I swept my gaze across the apple trees as we passed through the entrance to the farm, their wet canopies glittering as if dusted with tiny jewels. Even as I watched, it faded as the raindrops evaporated under the brightening sunlight.

Some of the trees already bore copious fruit. I didn't know much about apple farming, but I thought mid-summer was the earliest they could be harvested. Obviously, Applejack must have thought them ready; she approached the tree, pushing a low, wooden barrel ahead of her with her head to join the half-dozen or so other barrels already arrayed about the trunk. She looked towards us and waved a hoof. "Afternoon, y'all! At least that lazy pegasus got the clouds cleared up. Thought I was gonna hafta delay this."

I glanced up again. The sky was clear save for that one fluffy white cloud. As I squinted, I spotted a rainbow-colored tail hanging lazily over its side.

"Sorry if we're interrupting," said Fluttershy.

Applejack smiled. "Nah, this won't take but a moment."

I lowered my gaze to Applejack. "What won't take--?"

Applejack turned her tail towards the tree, and I flinched when she let loose with her rear hooves. She bucked the trunk hard enough to shake the entire tree, spraying rainwater on all three of us ...

... and neatly dropping all the apples of the tree into the waiting barrels.

I stared. "I ... what??"

Applejack chuckled. "Still got a lot ta learn 'bout how things work 'round here, huh?" she said with a smile and a wink.

A drop of rainwater trickled between my eyes and over my muzzle. I wiggled my nose to flick it away.

"Heh, sorry 'bout gettin' y'all wet," said Applejack.

"It's okay," I said with a faint smile. "And, yeah, I guess I do have a lot to learn."

"Heart of the matter is, unicorns and pegasi ain't the only ones with magic." She swept a foreleg towards the rest of the grove. "Earth ponies know how the land works."

I had indeed been guilty of thinking that earth ponies didn't have much going for them other than enhanced strength (Pinkie's brand of reality-bending aside).

"So lemme guess what brought ya 'round these here parts," said Applejack. "Ya got invited by the Crusaders."

"Yeah, Sweetie Belle said they wanted to meet me."

"Yep, they be in the clubhouse already." She jabbed a hoof towards a gap in the trees ahead. The big red stallion I had met the first day stood just off to the side, tossing broken branches into a cart. "Just straight on ahead. Ask Big Mac fer help if ya get turned around."

Big Mac? Given his cutie mark, I would have been very surprised if that wasn't short for Big MacIntosh. "Thanks."

"Mind if I ask ya somethin' before ya go?"

There was a question that used to make me nervous. Well, I guess it still did, just in a different way. "No, go ahead."

"Ya tell 'em 'bout where yer really from yet?"

"Not yet," I said. I decided to answer the unspoken question. "I'm not sure when I will. Rarity seemed to think I didn't need to rush it."

"She mentioned that after we left the castle the other day," said Fluttershy.

"Yep," said Applejack. "Not sure I agree with it completely, but it's really up to you."

"I think she's worried about that challenge to her fostering application," I said.

Applejack nodded. "Kinda what I thought, too."

"You have any idea who's behind it? She won't tell me anything."

Applejack looked thoughtful. "Hmm. Not sure I wanna second-guess her. If she doesn't want ya to know, I reckon she has a reason."

I glanced at Fluttershy, and she averted her eyes briefly. Damn, they did know. Then again, what would the name mean to me? Getting out the mode of thinking I had to rely on myself for everything was hard. I was a kid who had been forced into being an adult, and now I had to learn how to be a kid again.

Applejack smiled. "Mebbe jus' don't worry about it none fer now. But if anypony would be understandin' 'bout yer past, it'd be Apple Bloom and her friends."

That did help. I had already spent more time than I should have worrying about what other ponies would think about me.

"Thanks, Applejack." I looked past her. Big Mac appeared about to hitch himself to the cart. "I better get going, I wanted to talk to Big Mac for a minute." I cantered past her. "Hey, um, Big Mac?"

He stopped and turned his head. He practically towered over me. "Eeyup?"

"Hi. I'm the filly you took the hospital in the cart," I said.

"Eeyup."

I assumed that meant he remembered me. "I just wanted to thank you. I hope I didn't cause you too much trouble."

He smiled. "Nnope."

I paused. Was he expecting me to say something else? "Okay, well ... that's good. So, um ... the Crusaders' clubhouse is just through here?"

"Eeyup." He pointed a hoof through a gap in the trees.

Had I said something wrong? Too much? Not enough? "O-kay ... thanks. Uh ... sorry if I took too much of your time."

"Nnope."

"Er ... I just don't want to be a bother, you know?"

"Eeyup."

"Um ..."

I suddenly heard a snicker behind me. I glanced towards a smirking Applejack and then back at Big Mac. My own lips twitched into a tiny smile. "You're a pony of few words, aren't you?"

Big Mac's smile widened. "Eeyup."

I spotted the tree-house easily. Fortunately, it appeared roomy enough for somepony of my stature. As if anticipating my arrival, Sweetie Belle poked her head out of the doorway and waved. "Come on up, Candy! We've been waiting for you!"

Waiting for me? That sounded a bit ominous.

No, I had to stop being suspicious of everything. How bad could this be? What would little ponies do to get their cutie marks? Could it be any worse than simple arts and crafts, or maybe some sort of sports? If so, all I had to do was play along with their little game and keep an eye on them. What could happen here on the farm anyway?

I climbed up into the tree-house without much difficulty and stepped inside. Indeed, the little yellow filly with the big red bow was here, standing on a box next to a paper tacked to the wall. Sweetie Belle stood nearby, as well as an orange pegasus filly with a cerise mane and tail.

"Hiya, Candy!" said the yellow filly. "I'm Apple Bloom." She pointed a hoof at the pegasus. "This here is Scootaloo, an' ya already met Sweetie Belle."

All three suddenly shouted in unison, "We're the Cutie Mark Crusaders!"

...

Had they rehearsed this?

I glanced from one eager face to another and boldly proclaimed my skill in dealing with little kids via my stark silence.

"So are ya ready?" said Apple Bloom.

I glanced at Sweetie Belle, and her eyes shifted to the side. "Er ... ready for what?" I said.

"Ta get initiated into the Crusaders, of course!"

I stared. "Pardon?"

Apple Bloom hopped off her box, and I got a better look at the paper on the wall. Several small pictures had been drawn on it, and each one subsequently crossed out. Was that a chronicle of their failed exploits? One was a drawing of a chicken and another of a pig. I didn't speculate too hard on those.

"Well, ya don't have a cutie mark yet, an' that's exactly the kinda thing we're here fer," said Apple Bloom.

"Um, you do realize I'm, like, five years older than you girls, right?" I said.

"Even more reason why ya gotta join. Yer overdue!"

"Wait a minute." I turned to Sweetie Belle. "Didn't you promise Rarity you wouldn't do something like this?"

Sweetie scraped a hoof on the floor. "Um, well, yes, but ..."

Scootaloo stepped forward. "She may have made the Pinkie Promise, but I didn't!"

"An' neither did I!" proclaimed Apple Bloom. "So me and Scootaloo are in the clear. We can help ya all we want, and Sweetie can jus' come along fer moral support."

Oh, spiffy.

Scootaloo's face turned glum. "And we can make up for kinda messing things up for you."

I gave her a perplexed look. "Messing what up?"

Sweetie Belle rolled her eyes. "Scootaloo accidentally let it slip to the wrong pony that Rarity wanted to foster you."

Apple Bloom frowned. "Yeah, and now that mean mare Spoiled Rich is makin' all sorts of trouble for ya."

Spoiled Rich? Seriously? I mean, yeah, some ponies had strange names, but come on!

Scootaloo smiled and trotted up to me. "But if you get your cutie mark, then she'll hafta leave you alone."

"Uh, I don't think it quite works that way," I said.

Apple Bloom stepped up. "Don't worry, Candy, we know exactly what we're doin'."

I had my doubts as to the objective truth of that statement.

"We've got a sure-fire way of gettin' ya yer cutie mark."

"They do," Sweetie Belle said when I glanced at her. She thrust a hoof towards Apple Bloom and Scootaloo. "They came up with it. Not me. But I really think it'll work."

"Came up with what?" I asked warily.

"We're gonna keep it a surprise," Apple Bloom said. "But from what Sweetie's done told us, we're sure yer gonna love it. An' ya don't even hafta worry 'bout gettin' the wrong cutie mark, cuz you'll be a natural at it!"

I narrowed my eyes at Sweetie. "What did you tell them about me?"

"Oh, you know ... things," Sweetie said, smiling.

"What things?"

"Things Rarity told me. Look, this is going to work. We -- they got this all figured out."

"But if nopony tells me what it is, how am I going to do it?" I looked around. "You don't even have anything here that--"

"Oh, but that's the best part," said Scootaloo, fluttering her wings briefly. "We have to go to the White Tail Woods."

"The what?"

"An' we're gonna start tomorrow mornin' so we have the whole day," said Apple Bloom. "Jus' meet us outside the farm here 'bout an hour after sunrise, an' we'll all head over together."

"But--"

Sweetie Belle stepped forward. "Candy, don't worry about it, they've got this. Trust me."

Scootaloo turned to Apple Bloom. "I still say we'd have better luck in the Everfree Forest."

Apple Bloom rolled her eyes. "We're not doin' the Everfree, Scootaloo."

Scootaloo smirked. "Now who's chicken?"

Sweetie Belle smiled nervously at me. "Um, Candy, don't pay any attention to that. It--"

"We're not runnin' into the consarned cockatrice again!" Apple Bloom declared.

My eyes widened. "Did ... d-did she just say cockatrice?!"

Sweetie Belle face-hoofed and turned to the others. "Not helping!"

I sighed. "Look, girls, I'm ... not from around here. Don't take me someplace you know is dangerous."

Apple Bloom waved a hoof. "Aw, don't worry none, Candy. The White Tail Woods ain't dangerous. Practically the whole town does the Runnin' of the Leaves there every year."

I had no idea what that was. I eyed Sweetie Belle instead. She slowly smiled and nodded. "It's true, lots of ponies go there all the time."

"So if I ask Rarity about it, she'll tell me the same thing?"

"Yep, she would!"

"And if I told her you wanted me to go to the White Tail Woods ..."

Sweetie jammed a hoof to the side. "They do!"

"Okay! If I told her they wanted to take me to the White Tail Woods, she wouldn't have a problem with it?"

"No, not at all. Perfectly safe."

"C'mon, Candy, it'll be jus' fine," said Apple Bloom.

"And if we're with you when we're loo -- er ..." Scootaloo faltered when Apple Bloom glared at her. " ... I mean when we're doing what we're going to be doing, we'll get our cutie marks, too!"

"An' that's what fellow Crusaders do," said Apple Bloom. "We help each other all the time like that."

If they believed this venture could earn them their own cutie marks, I didn't want to be the wet blanket. How else would I figure out whether I wanted to stay or not if I didn't immerse myself in Equestrian culture? I was supposed to stop being suspicious of everything and start making friends. Maybe we'd have some sort of harmless lark in the woods, they'd cross off another thing from their list, and no harm done in the end.

It also didn't help that pony children were so ... cute. So much for my hard-boiled New York exterior (if I ever truly had one).

"Okay," I said with a sigh. "I guess we can try ... whatever this is."

Apple Bloom smiled. "Ya won't be sorry, trust me."

"Don't forget!" Sweetie Belle said. "We have to initiate her first."

"Oh, right!" Apple Bloom said. She turned to me. "Ya ready?"

The others gathered around me. I had the eerie sense of being surrounded. "Um, I think so?"

Apple Bloom lifted a fore-hoof high in the air. Scootaloo lifted one as well and touched it to Apple Bloom's. Sweetie Belle followed suit and turned to me. "Candy?"

Was that it? I didn't know whether to be relieved or disappointed. I reached a fore-hoof forward and touched it to theirs.

"CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS NEW MEMBER CANDY SWIRL! YAY!!"

Good Lord. I had no idea what this would destroy first, my sanity or my eardrums.

Chapter 21 - Shadows From The Past

"Candy! There you are!"

I stumbled as I emerged from the boutique after having retrieved my saddlebag. Twilight's voice had surprised me not so much for its presence as its direction. I had forgotten she had wings with as little as I had seen her use them.

"Oh, hi, Twilight," I said as she landed before me. "I was just on my way over. I had to stop to pick up--"

Twilight pressed a hoof to my shoulder. Her horn flickered, light flashed, and a biting chill seized me for a split second.

"--my s-saddlebag ...?" My eyes widened as what had been Ponyville was now the inside of the castle library. "Did ... did we just teleport?"

Twilight smiled. "I'm really anxious to hear about your dream in light of my new theory!"

I stared at her as I shivered from the lingering cold, and my legs wobbled a bit.

Twilight blushed. "Oops, I'm sorry! I forgot, your world doesn't have magic. Are you okay?"

"I think so," I said in a steadier voice as the chill faded. "Maybe warn me next time, please?"

"I will, I promise. Do you need to sit down?"

I didn't, but I had a feeling this was going to take awhile. I took a seat near a single stack of books taller than me, arranged in a perfect tapering tower with the widest at the bottom and the narrowest at the top. "So what's your theory?"

"First let me tell you what I discovered when I studied the residual magic from Chrysalis' spell," said Twilight in an excited voice. "Chrysalis was definitely trying to channel emotional energy through the pendant. That just confirms my original hypothesis that the pendant was designed to absorb unusual forms of energy."

I surprised myself; I actually understood that. "So that's its original purpose? To absorb emotions?"

Twilight smiled. "Now that's an interesting question! My testing confirmed that's one of the energies it can absorb, but there's much more to it than that. The complexity of the thaumic matrix is nothing less than astounding. Chrysalis may very well have only scratched the surface. She quite possibly could have tapped into far more power than that!"

Had I not come to know Twilight as a pony nerd, I would have been alarmed at how excited she sounded at the prospect of Chrysalis using the thing for world domination. "Well, you did say she was single-minded."

"Either that, or she's simply not as versed in this kind of magic," said Twilight, her eyes almost glittering. "But I haven't even touched on the most exciting part of my theory yet. The matrix is so complex that I can't see how something like this can be compressed into such a tiny space. There has to be a guiding intelligence behind it."

My eyes widened. "Wait, you mean ... the pendant can actually think?"

"It makes perfect sense. You said yourself that it pleaded with you not to give it away. And then there's how you had to coax it into accepting me as its owner."

My heart fluttered. I quelled the urge to refute her reasoning, as I would also have to deny the presence that Princess Luna had sensed. But did I really want to accept the idea that I had carried something sentient -- or possibly even sapient -- around my neck for so long? "Um, o-okay. What's behind this intelligence?"

Twilight's smile broadened. "That's the best part. It has to be none other than Starswirl the Bearded himself!"

I swallowed. "Wait. You're not saying that Starswirl himself is in the pendant somehow? Didn't he live like a really long time ago?"

"Well, no, not the Starswirl, of course," said Twilight.

I let out a tiny sigh of relief, though my heart still raced.

"And, yes, he passed on during the pre-classical period. I doubt very much even somepony as accomplished in magic as Starswirl could place his own spirit into an object, especially since he lived on well past the time period when I believe he forged this pendant. But he could create a sort of impression, a mental image, an ... an avatar of himself. Do you realize why this is so wonderful if I'm right?"

"I guess?" I paused and sighed. "Or maybe I don't. I'm sorry, Twilight, I'm just not as versed in magic as--"

"If I can find the right energy to infuse into the pendant, I just might be able to talk to this intelligence. It would be almost like talking to Starswirl himself! Some ponies can only dream of finding some long lost journal of his, but I get to talk directly to the most powerful mage Equestria has ever produced!"

"You mean his avatar, right?" I said in a cautious voice.

Twilight blushed. "Er, yes, of course, that's what I meant." She giggled and waved a hoof. "I know, I must sound like I'm fanfillying a little ..."

A little?

"But what really makes me think my theory is correct is your name."

I gave her a dumbfounded look. "Huh?"

"Your name! Candy Swirl."

It took a moment to click, for I had never made even the remotest connection. "Wait a minute. Pinkie Pie came up with that name. It sounds nothing like my original name."

"Yes, but Pinkie's magic works in strange ways, and it's entirely possible she may have been influenced by the pendant, thus establishing the connection."

I again wanted to question the Princess of Magic. Hadn't I already gone down that route to my own detriment? "Okay, so ... why didn't Starswirl himself appear in my dreams to explain what was happening?"

"Because you wouldn't have understood it," Twilight explained. "Starswirl's avatar likely had access to your memories and prompted you to think of somepony familiar instead. He would have sensed the Equestrian magic blocking your memory and was trying to help."

I hopped off the chair. Irritation crept into my voice. "But he didn't do a thing until I actually came to Equestria. Why?"

Twilight paused. "That I don't know yet. It's possible he needed access to the thaumic field of Equestria to accomplish anything useful."

"And so he caused me to come here?" I demanded.

Twilight's ears drew back. "I don't understand."

I paused to calm myself. What was the point of being upset? Hadn't I already accepted living in this strange world for now? "Sorry," I said in a softer voice. "Remember when I told you about the alley, and what the pendant did to draw attention to me?"

"Oh, yes, right!"

"So are you telling me that Starswirl was responsible for that?"

"It's possible," Twilight said in a contrite voice. "But realize that the pendant contains at best a shadow of his intellect and not his feelings. He may have sensed Discord nearby and took a calculated risk."

Calculated risk? Was that what this was reduced to? I ... no, enough. I had to stop emoting and start thinking. Yet my doubts about this connection were not based on logic; it simply felt wrong. "Maybe I should tell you about my dream ..."

Twilight appeared subdued after I finished my tale. "Hmm."

"So are you saying that this avatar of Starswirl is still using imagery of my friend to tell me something?"

Twilight considered. "It's certainly possible. It may even be reiterating the same message that was in my own dream."

"Princess Luna mentioned you had some interesting dreams."

Twilight's expression brightened. "Yes, I did! It's ultimately what inspired this theory. I dreamed I found an abandoned castle, yet when I entered, the place was spotless, and all the torches were lit. The courtyard had a huge banner of Starswirl the Bearded. I found a hoof-written note attached to it in archaic Equestrian."

I tilted my head. "Er ... archaic Equestrian?"

"Yes, it read: thou art to meet me at thy convenience in the royal wing. It matched perfectly old hoofwriting of Starswirl I had seen in the Canterlot archives, so I was sure it was from him. But when I got there, I found two rooms. Oddly, one was locked and had a sign on the door that read: disturbeth not. The other was open, but empty, save for the pendant. The pendant was inert, like it had been completely drained of magic." Twilight smiled. "So do you see the connection?"

"Um, sort of," I said warily.

"I think Starswirl ... ah, I mean his avatar ... wants to talk to me! Your dream may have conveyed the same message, where your friend was trying to talk to the pendant. But he needs me to infuse energy into it to make it possible, so I need to ask your permission."

"Huh? My permission?"

"I know you gave me the pendant, but I still consider it yours," Twilight said in a softer voice. "There's a small chance I could damage it."

I frowned. "Honestly, Twilight, I'm not sure I care whether it gets damaged or not."

"I'm sorry?"

"Maybe the reason it's still affecting me is because it's tying me to a past I want to leave behind."

"But you said it was a symbol of your friendship," Twilight protested.

"Yes, it is, but ... maybe a symbol of all the wrong things." I rubbed a hoof through my mane. "It's hard to explain. It's like it reminds me of all the bad things, but all I want to remember are the good things instead. I don't need a stupid piece of jewelry for that."

Twilight drew her ears back. I could guess what she was thinking: how could I say such a thing about a valuable artifact? Or did she believe I didn't value my friendship enough? It had sounded right in my head, but the more I thought on it, the stranger it sounded even to my own ears.

Maybe Fluttershy was right; I did need to talk to somepony about this.

"I think I understand, Candy," Twilight said softly. "Do you even want me to pursue this?"

I heard the disappointment in her voice, and my heart ached. Her willingness to give up this chance to speak to her idol spoke volumes of her respect for me. Yet even as much as I wanted little to do with the pendant anymore, I didn't feel right about denying her. I smiled faintly. "Well, that's just it. If you do manage to talk to this avatar, you can at least thank him for helping me."

"Would you want to be here when I do the experiment so you can talk to him yourself?" Twilight asked.

That was a question I really didn't want to answer. "When are you going to do it?"

"It'll take me the rest of the day to craft the proper spell, so the earliest would be tomorrow morning."

I uttered a weak laugh. "Believe it or not, I have something else to do. Which reminds me, I wanted to ask you something. Are you familiar with the White Tail Woods?"

Twilight smiled. "Oh, yes, of course. It's just west of Ponyville."

"Is it safe?"

Twilight looked thoughtful. "Shining Armor swept that area with a contingent of guards while he was looking for the second changeling. He didn't find anything, so, yes, I'd say it is."

"Okay, good."

"I'm curious, though, as to why you asked."

I rolled my eyes. "Oh, Sweetie Belle's friends want to go on some lark in the woods tomorrow morning, and they invited me along."

"Do you mean the Cutie Mark Crusaders?"

"Yeah, them."

Twilight sighed. "Probably yet another scheme to gain their cutie marks. In that case, I'm glad you're going with them. They could use a little more supervision."

I still didn't think I was the best pony to be in charge, but I supposed it would be fairly easy to tell if they tried something that was a threat to life or limb. They had survived this long doing this sort of thing without so much as a single scar to show for it.

"If you could stop by the castle after you're done, I can share with you the result of my experiment tomorrow," Twilight said.

I nodded. "Sure, I can do that."

Twilight smiled. "Before you go, I have something for you. Since fall is the earliest you can attend school, I thought you might want to at least learn a little about Equestria itself."

I smiled. "Yes, I'd like that. Fluttershy said you had some books for me."

Twilight stepped over to the tall stack and gestured with a hoof. "Right here!"

My smile faded. "Um ..."

Twilight's horn glowed, and the stack lifted into the air, separating into its constituent volumes. "Now, I thought the best place to start would be a discussion of ancient history ..." A book sailed towards me and plopped into one of my saddlebags. "... the history the original three pony tribes ... then the founding of Equestria ..." More books dropped into my bags. "... the pre-classical era ... language and culture ... basics of pony magic ... founding of the diarchy ... famous ponies from antiquity ..."

"Urf," I grunted when I could no longer distinguish the books from so many lead weights.

"... oh, can't forget fashion trends, too, Rarity might be interested in that one as well ... advances in magical understanding ... further evolution of the Equestrian language ..."

"Um, Twilight?" I said in a strained voice as my barrel sagged and my legs trembled.

"... the basics on the magic of harmony ... theories of friendship relating to magic ... understandings of chaos magic ..."

"Twilight!"

" ... and then ... huh? Oh!"

My legs gave out, and I collapsed onto my belly. "Maybe ... a little lighter reading ... at first?" I gasped as I struggled to breathe.

"Oops!" Twilight blushed as she levitated some books out of my saddlebags. "Heh, sorry."

My legs still ached from the load as I struggled to my hooves, my saddlebags almost filled to bursting, but at least I could breathe again.

Twilight settled the remaining books back into a neat stack. "Please come see me the moment you're ready for more books."

I gave her a strained smile. "I will, thank you."

Laboring under the weight of the books, I envied the earth ponies. Applejack likely could have carried this without breaking a sweat. I glanced at the faces of the other ponies as if expecting to find one looking at me in amusement. Were those two pony children I spied earlier following me, or was that just my paranoia creeping back?

Halfway to the boutique, I hatched a plan of dubious brilliance to lighten my load: levitate the thickest book and hold it before me as I trotted. After all, everything else I had held onto with magic seemed light as a feather.

My magical glow enveloped a single book, and I smirked at my "prowess" at snagging a single object from a tight cluster. My grin faded as I clenched my teeth with the effort to lift it; apparently heavy objects remained heavy, magic or no. I trembled as I struggled to hold it before me. I took a single step, but while I moved, the book didn't. In a panic that I was about to bonk myself in the head, I let it go. It fell with a great thud right before my hooves, and my ponderous momentum sent me crashing to the ground as I tripped, plowing my muzzle into the dirt.

I heard a burst of giggling behind me.

I clenched my teeth as heat blossomed in my cheeks. I rose to my hooves, spitting dirt. I grabbed the book in my magic, intending to drop it back into the saddlebag. My hold faltered, and several more books spilled onto the ground.

I stomped a fore-hoof and strained with the need for a much greater release. I really, really wished Equestrian had more swear words. Another spate of distant giggling didn't help, and I trembled in a mix of anger and embarrassment. Trying to put the books back with my hooves got me nowhere, not with the saddlebags still in place. With insufficient magical strength to levitate the whole thing, I had to crawl out from under it. It caught on my mane and scraped along the ground for some distance before I finally shimmied myself from its grip. I stumbled and fell back hard on my haunches.

The giggling erupted into outright laughter. With a growl, I bolted to my hooves and whirled around, yet when my gaze fell upon my tormentors, I could only stare.

The same two kids I had seen earlier now stood some distance away, still laughing. They were both earth pony fillies no older than Sweetie Belle and her friends. One had a pink coat and what looked like a little tiara on her lavender-and-white maned head. The other was gray with a braided silver mane, eyeglasses perched on her muzzle. They both bore cutie marks, but I couldn't make them out from that distance.

They stopped laughing when they noticed me staring at them, but the little pink filly gave me a look far more pompous than I thought any child ought to be capable of doing. Yet it tickled a memory that had been buried for who knew how long, and my blush threatened to return.

The pink filly smirked at me, whispered something to her friend, and both headed away with their muzzles raised snootily in the air. Seriously? I would have laughed if that memory had not impinged on my thoughts again. I uttered a sigh, and I just stared as they disappeared around the bend in the street.

"Excuse me, miss, do you need some help?"

I turned my head towards the friendly voice and saw a smiling mint-green unicorn approaching. She looked vaguely familiar. Instinct and irritation prompted me to refuse any help; fortunately, I had become smarter than that over the past few days. "Yes, please. Sorry, I'm ... just learning to use magic."

"Oh, are you Candy Swirl?"

She had a lyre as a cutie mark. I was sure I had seen her before. "Um, yes, actually, I am. How did you know?"

Her horn glowed, and she lifted the spilled books. "Pinkie Pie told me about you earlier. I'm her friend Lyra Heartstrings."

That was the name. She was with Bon Bon the other ... but, no, they were both changelings at the time.

Perhaps she had seen my ears draw back a little, for she rolled her eyes and said, "And I am the real Lyra this time."

"Oh, sorry."

"It's okay, Candy," she said with a sigh. "You're not the first pony I've had to say that to." She arranged the books inside the saddlebags and paused. "Are you sure you can carry this?"

"Now that I've had a little rest, I think so," I said. Damned if I was going to admit weakness after that experience with the two little pony delinquents. "I'm headed to the Carousel Boutique. It's not far from here."

Lyra carefully levitated the saddlebags back over my barrel. I steadfastly refused to wince. "So you think you'll be okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said in a slightly strained voice.

Lyra smiled. "Glad I could help. See you around!"

I watched as she headed away. I uttered a sigh and scraped a fore-hoof on the ground. Being subjected to a random act of kindness should not have left me so antsy. The memory flooded my head again. Michelle would have understood. She ...

I ... really did need to talk to somepony after all.

I stared at my surroundings as Fluttershy made some tea. Narrow crawl-ways and tiny staircases festooned the quaint interior of her hollowed-out tree cottage. I had stopped flinching at the scamper of critters over these animal highways, but mostly because I was too busy eying the creatures who skittered about the floor. Rather than running away as most animals would, they seemed genuinely curious, even excited, to see me.

Well, save for the one little white bunny who sat a fair distance away, munching a carrot and giving me the stink-eye. Really, what was that rabbit's problem?

"Here we go," came Fluttershy's cheerful voice, entering the room in one of her rare displays of flight, and then only to leave her hooves free to carry the tea tray. "Now, you were telling me about your friend Cherry?"

It had not taken long for me to grow tired of referring to Michelle as simply "my friend." Her name was another that didn't translate well, so we had settled on calling her "Miss Cherry" or simply "Cherry" instead. It was the only word in the Equestrian language that reminded me of Michelle, as she had a fondness for that particular fruit.

I took the proffered cup of tea in my hooves, deciding I had done enough damage with my nascent magical ability for one day. "I met her when I was about five, not long after I had moved to ... er ... well, the city back in my world that was like Manehattan. She was seven." I smiled. "I almost didn't understand her at first. She had such a thick accent."

Fluttershy giggled. "I know what you mean. The first time I heard Babs Seed talk, I hardly understood a word she said."

My smile widened slightly, but still had a bittersweet undertone to it. The memory those two little fillies had conjured would not leave me alone. "Cherry really helped me get settled in. She was always there when I had a problem or just needed someone to talk to. And, um, she talked me down whenever I tried to do something stupid."

"What do you mean?" Fluttershy asked.

I had almost hoped she wouldn't ask, but I needed the prompting. "I really looked up to my mother when I was, um, a foal," I said in a quavering voice. "I wanted to do everything she did. So I saw her once acting really uppity and snooty towards somepony."

Fluttershy's eyes widened. "Really? That's surprising, considering what you've said about her."

"Well, yeah, that's the point. I completely misread what was going on. But I was convinced that's what I was supposed to do, too. So, um ..." I blushed. "I sorta started practicing in front of a mirror acting just like that, all uppity and full of myself. Just like ... well, never mind. The point was, I acted really obnoxious."

I had been about to say "just like that little pink filly with the tiara," but I didn't want to recount the whole embarrassing incident.

Fluttershy raised a hoof to her muzzle. "Oh, my, really? You? Obnoxious?"

Why was that damn bunny nodding his head? I tried to ignore him. "Well, thank you, but, yeah, I was pretty bad. Cherry was not impressed when I showed her. She forced me to talk to my mother about it, and she set me straight. She was just putting on an act for somepony, poking fun at the way somepony else had tried to act towards her."

Fluttershy smiled. "It's funny, though, when you look at it now." She paused, her eyes uncertain. "Um ... isn't it?"

"Yes, it is, actually," I said, telling a half-truth. The humor simply could not overcome the ache that the memory of Michelle had left. I trembled for a moment, long enough for Fluttershy to reach out a hoof. She hesitated as if uncertain as to what to do. The gesture mirrored my own feelings.

I met her halfway, touching my hoof to hers. Her glistening eyes met mine, and I fought back the urge to cry. I hated this. I had already gotten past my guilt over Michelle's death, what more was there to express?

Stop emoting and start thinking, that had to be my mantra now. I took a deep breath, and my emotions settled. I felt like I had accomplished something in that moment. I felt more in control again. I smiled more naturally. "Thank you."

"Would you like to stay a little longer?" said Fluttershy. "It's not quite sunset yet."

I tipped back my cup and took a large sip of the tea I had been nursing. "Yes, I would like that. So long as I get back to the boutique by -- ow!"

Something had struck me right between the eyes, and I flinched when tea splashed over my fur. Fluttershy gasped, and her wings snapped open. I looked down and saw a half-eaten carrot in my teacup.

"Angel!" Fluttershy cried, frowning. "Stop being a naughty bunny!"

The white bunny folded his forelegs and gave both of us an indignant look.

"What was that all about?" I said.

Fluttershy blushed faintly. "Um, I guess I should've said something when you came in, but you're sitting in Angel's favorite chair."

Angel thumped a back foot and frowned at me.

I set down the cup. "Maybe I should get going after all."

"Oh, please, don't worry about Angel, he just--"

"No, it's okay, Fluttershy," I said, forcing a smile. "I'm anxious to start reading some of those books that Twilight gave me anyway."

Fluttershy slowly smiled. "All right. Just remember, you can come see me anytime you want."

Perhaps Angel's intervention had been timely. I had intended to spend the rest of the afternoon with Fluttershy recalling the happy memories of Michelle, but even those threatened to drive me to tears. I needed to move on somehow without forgetting her, and I had no idea where to start.

If only she would stop messing with my dreams.

Chapter 22 - Found

"And just where do you think you're going?"

My ears drew back. I had lived with Rarity for only two full days, but I already recognized that tone of voice. I turned away from the morning sunshine flooding the boutique from the open front door. "Is something wrong?"

Rarity trotted up to me. "Certainly you're not going out with your mane in that state."

"What? I washed it! And brushed it out, too."

"Washing and brushing are not the same as styling, dear."

I stared. "You're kidding, right? It's the weekend, and I'm going to be in a forest all morning."

Rarity lifted her muzzle. "That's no excuse for not looking your best. Now come along, and let me see if I can tease your hair into something halfway manageable."

"But--!"

"Ahem. Who's the fosterer here, you or me?"

My ears drooped, and I just barely resisted rolling my eyes. "You," I muttered.

She smiled, and with a glow from her horn, the front door swiftly closed. "Then come along."

Wow. Seriously, I had not expected Rarity to fall into this role so quickly or completely. Was this what I really wanted? Well, yes, but I was still a teenager, pony or no. And, to be honest, my mane was a mess; I had just hoped Rarity wouldn't notice.

"I'm going to be late, you know," I grumbled as I followed her into the parlor.

"Your friends can wait a little longer," Rarity said in a lofty voice as her magic grabbed a brush and a comb.

"You didn't make Sweetie Belle wait."

"She knows how to properly style her mane and tail in the mornings. Once you do, I'm sure you'll be able to keep to your appointments better. Now, hold still."

Despite uttering a dramatic sigh, I let a small smile flicker across my muzzle. I had actually enjoyed that harmless spat.

"To be honest, Candy, I think the Crusaders are far too wound up about attaining their cutie marks," Rarity said as she slid the brush through my thick mane. "I would be quite happy if you didn't emulate them."

"Believe me, I'm not intending to. I don't even know yet what I want to do in Equestria."

"Even though I do intend to employ you in the boutique, please don't feel obligated to follow a future in fashion. Whatever your talent is, it will come when the time is right."

"So when it does happen, it just ... happens?" I asked. "A cutie mark just appears one day?"

Rarity carefully brushed hair back from my eyes. "Usually after you have done something related to your true talent. Then it's not really all that much a surprise."

She trotted around me, and I caught a glimpse of the three diamonds gracing her flank. "Is it insulting to admit when you don't know what a pony's cutie mark means?"

Rarity worked on a tangle in my mane. "Not at all! Most ponies are more than happy to talk about their cutie marks."

"Then what does yours mean? I've been struggling to relate it to what you do now."

Rarity smiled. "I have an affinity for gems. My magic can detect them practically anywhere, which is how I maintain my stock. Though it goes beyond that. It also represents my sense of refinement, and the ability to bring out the beauty in anypony."

That actually made sense. "And I'm not too old to still not have one?"

Rarity grasped my mane in her magic and started twining it into a simple braid. It was nowhere near as elaborate as what they did at the spa, but it looked like it would hold my hair together better. "No, you most certainly aren't, regardless of what the Crusaders -- or anypony else -- might have to say about it."

My eyebrows rose slightly. "Anypony else?"

Rarity cleared her throat. "Ah ... forget I said that. The point is, there's no rule which dictates when you acquire your cutie mark." She paused. "Which does remind me, do you have any idea what the Crusaders are up to this morning? Sweetie Belle left before I could ask her."

I had wondered if Rarity had an ulterior motive for side-tracking me. "Sorry, I don't, other than it involves looking for something in the White Tail Woods."

Rarity sighed. "I suppose I should be glad they're not intending to visit the Everfree."

"Uh, yeah, I got the idea I should stay away from there."

"Please do, and see that they do as well." She paused in her braiding to apply the comb to a few last recalcitrant hairs. "And one more thing, Candy. Please make sure that, no matter who you meet, you remain polite at all times."

"Including Spoiled Rich?"

Rarity nearly dropped the comb. "Sweetie Belle told you, didn't she? Even after I had asked her not to."

"It wasn't her fault. Her friend Scootaloo mentioned it."

"Really, Rainbow Dash is a good friend, but she's sometimes a bad influence on that filly," said Rarity. "When the schoolfoals had to be escorted during this summit mess, Applejack told me she caught Rainbow Dash trying to teach Scootaloo how to fight changelings with her bare hooves."

Given what I knew of Rainbow, I was not at all surprised. "Are they related at all?"

"No, but Scootaloo might as well be Rainbow's number one fan. And Rainbow Dash did sort of unofficially 'adopt' Scootaloo as a little sister." Rarity finished braiding my mane and took a step back, uttering a sigh. "Well, that's better, anyway. I'll use some hair clips to hold the rest together. Your tail is at least passable."

"I'm sure it will be fine, Rarity." In a softer voice I added, "But thank you. I never had quite this much hair to care for in my original form."

Rarity smiled as she levitated hair clips into place. "Perhaps I am being a little overbearing. I know I said I would never think to replace your mother, but I want to give you something."

My eyes misted, but my voice remained steady. "I appreciate that."

"Which, of course, implies you will strive to fulfill your role as the rebellious and moody teenager."

I smirked. "Yeah, pretty much."

She rolled her eyes dramatically. "Whatever will I do with you, Candy Swirl?"

I broke the ensuing silence with a snort, and we both laughed. "Look at it this way. I'm giving you practice for when Sweetie Belle gets to be my age."

Rarity narrowed her eyes, though one corner of her mouth was still upturned. "Now you're just being a wise-flank."

"Maybe."

"In that case, off with you!" Rarity said as she put the brush and comb away. "And give me some peace this morning."

I giggled as I headed out. I needed that. Maybe now I could face the rest of the day.

As I turned down the road leading to the entrance of Sweet Apple Acres, I spotted Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle standing just outside the farm, both with saddlebags draped across their barrels. A third set, somewhat more worn and larger than the others, sat on the ground nearby. Apple Bloom held a piece of paper in her hoof. Their voices drifted to me as I approached.

"Goggles?" Apple Bloom called out.

Sweetie Belle glanced through the contents of their saddlebags. "Check!"

"Mallet?"

"Check!"

I blinked. Mallet?

"Rope?"

"Check!"

"Net?"

"Um, check, but it's a little frayed at one end."

"Pith helmet?"

"Check, but Pinkie needs it back by this afternoon."

"Um, girls?" I said in a tentative voice. "Sorry I'm late."

Apple Bloom smiled as she turned her head towards me. "Hiya, Candy! No problem. It gave us a chance ta do some recon."

I tilted my head. "Recon?"

"Be with ya in a minute!" Apple Bloom dropped her gaze to her paper. "Spray paint?"

"Check!" said Sweetie Belle.

"That thing I found behind the barn that I don't know what it does but looked dang useful anyway?"

Sweetie took a dubious look into Apple Bloom's saddlebag. "Um, check. I think."

"Code words?"

"Oh! No, we only did Scootaloo's," said Sweetie. "We were going to wait until Candy showed up before doing the rest."

Apple Bloom grinned and stuffed the paper into her saddlebags. "Then we're all ready, 'cept fer that."

I frowned slightly. "Seriously, girls, just what are you planning to do in that -- gah!"

I reared back and stumbled, nearly falling on my haunches as an orange blur buzzed across my path. Only when it zipped around and came to a literal screeching halt did it resolve itself as a helmeted Scootaloo riding a wooden scooter, her wings still fluttering like an engine in neutral.

"I found something!" Scootaloo cried, her smile wide. "There's this--"

"Code word!" both Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle cried.

"Oh, um, it's scooter-awesome. Anyway, I saw this big branch on the ground that's got some of that green goo at the end. It's gotta be somewhere around there!"

My eyes widened. Green goo?

"Good work, Scootaloo!" Apple Bloom cried. "We'll all get our cutie marks fer sure!"

I struggled not to sigh in exasperation. Their inventory already made it painfully clear they wanted not only to hunt something living but catch it as well. Twilight had claimed the woods safe, but did that include its flora and fauna? Most of the creatures I could think of that left slime trails (in my very limited knowledge of nature) were relatively harmless, but for all I knew, Equestria had fire-breathing, pony-eating giant snails. "Look, girls, if you're looking to track down something dangerous, I -- oof!"

Sweetie Belle had levitated the saddlebag on the ground and dropped it over my barrel.

"Nope, not dangerous at all," Apple Bloom called out. "Not if yer with us. Okay, now, code words." Apple Bloom looked thoughtful for a moment. "Mine'll be 'applesauce!'"

"Hmm," Sweetie murmured. "So for me, um ... 'sweet-stuff!'"

"I already have mine," Scootaloo said.

"So what 'bout you, Candy?" Apple Bloom said.

The obvious question sprang to mind: why did we need codewords? In retrospect, perhaps I should have made the connection, but these were kids. Surely they had been impressed as to the dangers of that sort of thing.

"Fine," I sighed. "My code word will be, uh, 'Cherry.'"

Apple Bloom headed down the road. "Okay, Crusaders, let's go!"

I nearly trotted into Scootaloo when her wings stopped, bringing her scooter to an abrupt halt. Before I could say a word, she face-hoofed and said, "Ugh, maybe we shoulda taken the road anyway."

The road out of the farm would have skirted the southern edge of town -- the same route I had taken to the hospital that first day -- and swung around towards the forest, but the Crusaders had been impatient and thus had chosen to cut through Ponyville instead.

As I looked ahead, my gaze fell on the same two little fillies I had seen the day before trotting directly towards us. The pink one wore a self-satisfied smile and bore a cutie mark which looked much like the tiara she wore on her head. The gray one had what looked like a spoon with a heart at one end.

"Don't tell 'em nothin' 'bout what we're doin'!" Apple Bloom said in an urgent voice. "They ain't got no right knowin' our bizness!"

The little pink one spoke. "Like I'd be interested in what obviously low-brow activities you and your lot are preparing to do, hayseed."

I raised an eyebrow.

"Ya got a funny way of showin' how ya don't care, Diamond," Apple Bloom muttered.

"Haven't you already filled your meanness quota for this week at school?" Sweetie Belle said.

"More like for the whole semester," Scootaloo murmured.

So apparently Equestria was not immune to bullies, but, still, this seemed almost surreal.

"Oh, but I just had to confirm what I suspected all along," said Diamond with a smirk. She lifted her gaze to me. "That you just couldn't resist associating with this blank-flank freak."

Had she actually directed that at me?

Sweetie Belle rolled her eyes. "Seriously, Diamond? Give that blank-flank stuff a rest. It's getting sooo old!"

Apple Bloom jumped forward. "She ain't no freak!"

Diamond gave Apple Bloom a supercilious look and lifted her muzzle. She glanced at me again. "Really, now? No idea how she got here? No idea of her parentage? No cutie mark? Really, I thought even the vaunted Crusaders could do better than this."

Her gray companion giggled.

My God, was this little pony for real? Sure, I wasn't an adult quite yet, but the idea that she felt so full of herself that she thought she could insult somepony several years her senior with impunity almost made me feel sorry for her.

Almost.

Apple Bloom stood muzzle-to-muzzle with Diamond. "I'd pit her blank-flank against yer fancy-schmancy cutie mark any day of the week, Diamond Tiara! She's done more in her short time in Ponyville than you ever did yer whole dang life!"

I have? What the hell did Sweetie tell them about me?

Diamond gave Apple Bloom a lofty look. "Hmph. Really. Then why is she still a blank-flank? For all you know, she's so defective she can't even get a cutie mark."

The gray one giggled again. "Yeah. Bet she'd just be a total blank-flank all her life no matter what she does. So pitiful."

Oh, yeah, great comeback, flunky.

"Don't call her that!" Scootaloo snapped with a vitriol that surprised me, her wings fluttering. "She's not defective!"

Diamond narrowed her eyes at Scootaloo. "Figures you'd be the one defending her. A pegasus your age who can't even fly."

Scootaloo's ears drooped, and her face fell, her eyes glistening.

Oh, fuck that. "Hey, Diamond Tiara?"

Diamond rolled her eyes and sighed dramatically. "Yes?" she said without deigning to look at me.

"With that huge ego of yours, how do you fit that swelled head through doorways?"

Dead silence fell and Diamond's jaw with it, her gaze snapping towards me as her pupils shrank to points.

Scootaloo fell off her scooter and rolled on her back, howling with laughter. The other Crusaders followed suit, and Diamond Tiara clenched her teeth so hard I could hear them grinding above the sound of my companions' mirth. Even the little gray pony beside her hid a brief grin behind her hoof.

"You won't think this is so funny after my mother is through with this blank-flank transplant!" Diamond bellowed.

"So big, useless egos must run in the family," I deadpanned.

Diamond stomped her fore-hooves. "I've had enough of this! Come on, Silver! We've got better things to do than associate with the common rabble!"

Silver? Oh, let me guess: her full name was Silver Spoon. Jesus, these names. Both fillies thrust their muzzles into the air and trotted off, but I saw Diamond urging Silver to a canter as my friends laughed until tears ran down their faces. I allowed myself a slight snicker.

"Oh, wow, Candy, you got her so good!" Scootaloo said as she righted herself on her hooves.

"Now I know yer gonna get yer cutie mark fer sure today!" Apple Bloom said as she wiped tears from her eyes. "With as mighty brave as ya were jus' now!"

Some of my smile faded. "Um, brave?"

"Well, I reckon she's gonna go to her mother 'bout this."

"Okay, yeah, but ... should I be worried about that?"

Sweetie Belle stepped up to me, her own mirth fading rapidly. "You mean you don't know?"

"Know what?!" I cried in exasperation.

"Her mother is Spoiled Rich."

"Her ... I ... she ..." I sputtered. I sighed and face-hoofed. "Great."

Sweetie gave me a concerned look. "You okay, Candy?"

"Of course she is!" Apple Bloom declared, smiling. "Who wouldn't be after gettin' a good one on Diamond Tiara!"

"I can't wait to tell Rainbow Dash about this," said Scootaloo as she climbed back on her scooter. "That was awesome."

My ears drooped. Yes, let's find ways for it get back even faster to Rarity. Brilliant.

"I'm sorry about this," said Sweetie in a contrite voice. "I thought you knew who she was. I keep forgetting you're not from around here."

I sighed. "Not your fault. Come on, we better get going so we can ... um, whatever it is we're doing."

"Onward, Crusaders!" Apple Bloom declared as she took the lead.

The tall trees of the forest imposed a quiet more gentle than even the laid back pace of Ponyville. The only sound was the rustling of the leaves in the breeze, the chirping of birds, and the soft beat of our hooves against earth. My ears constantly swiveled at the slightest noise, and my heart raced despite the apparent calm. Or perhaps, in a way, because of it.

Apple Bloom's voice almost startled me. "So where'd ya see the goo, Scootaloo?"

The little orange pegasus drove her scooter ahead, her tiny wings buzzing. Even if Diamond's accusation about her lack of flight was true, she certainly made good use of her wings on her little scooter. "It's just to the right of a big tree."

"Um, Scootaloo?" Sweetie Belle said. "Which big tree?"

"Hang on, I'm trying to remember."

Was the air supposed to be faintly electrified? I felt like I had hairs standing on end, yet when I ran a hoof over my mane, it remained as well-coiffed as it had been when I left the boutique.

"Oh, I remember now!" Scootaloo said. Her wings revved, and she tore ahead in a cloud of dust.

"Wait, don't go too far ahead!" I cried, galloping after her. The odd feeling worsened the further I went into the forest. My ears alternately twitched and flattened. My head snapped around when I thought I saw an ethereal shape at the edge of my vision, but nothing was there.

I nearly bowled into Scootaloo when I came upon her stopped in a small clearing. She thrust her hoof forward. "Right there!" she cried happily.

The other Crusaders had arrived and trotted ahead of me towards the broken branch lying in the dirt at the gnarled roots of a large and ancient tree. A shaft of sunlight breaking through the thick canopy highlighted the glistening, bright green blob of goo, perched in the "Y" formed by a fork in the branch.

Apple Bloom entered the circle of sunlight. "Wow, yeah, look at that!"

I narrowed my eyes. So we just happened to find this so perfectly situated on the ground such that this one lonely shaft of sunlight highlighted this bit of organic slime? Oh, yeah, totally not suspicious at all. "Girls, I think you really need to tell me what you're ... I ... w-wait ..."

A wave of something like static electricity passed over me, and the skin under my fur prickled. I uttered a tiny gasp as a phantom image again played at the edge of my perception. My eyes widened and my heart skipped a beat as I caught what I thought was a figure -- a human figure -- past a thicket of trees, but it vanished again when I tried to focus on it.

"Look, another one!" Scootaloo suddenly cried. She zoomed on ahead, and the rest of us followed. My longer strides brought me there just ahead of Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle, and my gaze fell on another glob of bright green goo, this time on the ground, and again, glistening inside a bright patch of sunlight.

Apple Bloom lifted her head and thrust a hoof forward. "It's a trail! We got it fer sure now!"

"Wait a minute, girls!" I cried, but they had already galloped deeper into the forest. I sighed and followed.

I found them stopped beside a tree, its trunk smeared with more green slime. Apple Bloom turned to face us. "Okay, Crusaders, we're gettin' close! I think Candy needs ta take the lead now, since we're here fer her cutie mark."

I marched towards them, my eyes briefly darting amongst the trees as my fur seemed to crackle, my ears swiveling madly. "Something weird is going on out here." I waved a hoof at the goo. "Don't you think this is a little too convenient?"

"Huh?" Apple Bloom said in a perplexed voice. "Whaddaya mean?"

I thrust a hoof back the way we had come. "Look! Each of these little 'clues' on the trail are perfectly spaced right we'd find them. You don't think that's just a little suspicious?"

"Um, she might be right," Sweetie said. "Besides, look at this." She trotted a short distance away, where a narrow path led off through the trees and away from the trail. She pointed at the ground, "See? There's hoof-prints in the dirt here."

"But they don't walk, they fly!" said Apple Bloom.

"The hoof-prints end up ahead. Maybe they were disguised and then changed back."

"Maybe she's right," Scootaloo said.

Apple Bloom put a hoof to her chin. "Hmm. Maybe we need ta explore both the--"

"Okay, enough!" I declared. "Tell me right now what you girls are after."

Apple Bloom turned to me and smiled. "Changelings, of course."

My brain stopped. I looked to the other Crusaders, and they simply nodded and smiled.

"They never caught one of 'em, so we figgered it's gotta be 'round here somewhere, an' that trail jus' proves it. Now all we gotta do is--"

"Are you out of your minds?!" I shouted.

The Crusaders exchanged confused looks. "But this is right where the trail--" Apple Bloom began.

"That's not what I mean!" I cried. "How did you ever get the idea I wanted to do this? Or that I was good at it? Or that it was even remotely safe?!"

"'Cuz of the way ya bravely fought the changelings at the castle!"

"I ... wh-what?" I turned to Sweetie Belle. "Just what did you tell them??"

Her ears flattened. "I-I just told them what Rarity said, that you stood up to Queen Chrysalis. I never said anything about fighting changelings!"

Apple Bloom stepped forward. "I heard that from Scootaloo. She's the one who said Candy fought 'em with her bare hooves!"

"And I heard it from Rainbow Dash!" Scootaloo said.

I narrowed my eyes at her. "Rainbow Dash told you I fought changelings. Really."

"Well ... um ... she said you acted really brave, so I assumed she meant--"

"You assumed?"

Scootaloo averted her eyes. "Um, maybe I exaggerated a little."

"A LITTLE?!"

Apple Bloom frowned at her companion. "Scootaloo, I swear, ya done messed this whole thing up."

"Thank you," I said with a relieved sigh.

"If I knew she hadn't fought 'em with her bare hooves, I woulda packed the bigger mallet!"

I stared, blinked, and face-hoofed.

"Look, we're here anyway," said Sweetie Belle. "Maybe we should at least investigate--"

"No, stop!" I cried. "You don't understand what you're--"

"... Wh-what ... huh??"

I shivered violently and stumbled back a step. A sound like a gusty wind roared in my ears, yet the air remained deathly still. My fur felt like it stood on end despite still laying flat. I swallowed hard as my ears twitched and swiveled as if trying to find the source of words that had no sound.

"What is it, Candy?" Sweetie asked. "Are you all right?"

I gulped hard and spun around. My heart tried to pound its way out of my chest as my gaze fell on a ghostly figure, just barely visible between two trees along the trail of green goo up ahead.

I shivered. The only time I had heard that voice since coming to Equestria was in my dreams. It couldn't be her. Not here. Not now. And yet as I stared, the figure waved an arm and retreated further into the forest.

"Candy?" Apple Bloom called out.

"S-stay here," I said in a shaky voice, not taking my eyes from the figure.

Apple Bloom gasped. "Ya see somethin'?"

"Is it the changeling?" Scootaloo called out excitedly.

"Sweetie, get out the mallet and the net!" Apple Bloom said.

I whirled around. "No! Stop! Don't do anything! Just stay here!"

Their pupils shrank as they stared at me in shock. "We jus' wanna help ya with yer cutie mark," Apple Bloom said in a small voice.

"Never mind my cutie mark! I don't have time to explain right now, but please, just stay right here and let me investigate this."

The others looked past me. "Um, investigate what?" Sweetie asked.

I thrust a hoof towards the figure. "You don't see that?"

They looked again. "See what?" Scootaloo asked.

My ears twitched. "N-never mind. Just ... just stay here. I'll be right back."

I left the perplexed Crusaders muttering in my wake. Trembling, I stepped forward, the figure retreating as I approached, until I had entered a small, dark clearing. My heart leapt into my throat as the figure grew more distinct, and my legs almost gave out.

The shimmering figure of Michelle stood opposite me. She wore a flowing robe of purple, her feet bare, looking far more healthy than she ever had in my dreams, save for being incorporeal. My throat had closed up, and all I could do was stare.

I shivered. Her voice had a reverberating quality to it, unnervingly like Chrysalis despite the familiar cadence. She spoke Equestrian, but in an odd dialect. "Wh-what ... why are you ...?!"

"What are you talking about?! What peril? Who lurks around here? And why are--?"

All remaining questions flew out of my head. My blood ran cold.

Michelle faded, her body growing milky and indistinct. Her voice became more wispy and breathy, like speaking into the wind.

She vanished. My ears flattened. My heart raced. I galloped back to the Crusaders and shouted, "We need to get out of here now!"

"CODE WORD!" a chorus of voices shouted back.

"Cherry! Now, listen to me! We ... uh ..." My gaze frantically darted over the others, yet no matter how many times I counted, I came up one short. "Where's Sweetie Belle?!"

Apple Bloom lifted a hoof. "She wanted ta check out the path."

My heart sank. "I told you to stay--! A-all right, we have to get to her and get out of here."

"What's the matter?" Scootaloo asked, her wings twitching.

Before I could respond, a shrill scream turned my blood to ice.

"Sweetie!" Apple Bloom cried as she bolted down the trail, Scootaloo blazing after her on her scooter.

I galloped after them and managed to overtake even the zealous scooter master, wishing for all the world that I was more advanced in my magic training. I let out a gushing sigh of relief when a panicked Sweetie Belle met us, racing towards us like the devil was at her back, her eyes glazed and terrified.

"Sweetie, are you all right?!" I cried as she stopped.

Apple Bloom suddenly burst in front of me and narrowed her eyes at Sweetie Belle. "Code word!"

Sweetie Belle gulped and stammered, "Um ... uh ... s-sweet-stuff!"

"Sweetie, what happened?" I said.

She trembled. "I-I just saw ... a p-pegasus ... he's ... o-one of those cocoon things ..."

I wasn't sure what she meant, but it didn't sound good. I raced on ahead but let the Crusaders follow, as I didn't want to leave them alone for another second. I soon skidded to a halt, my eyes wide in a mix of horror and disbelief.

Hanging upside-down from a thick branch of a tree was a large pegasus, his eyes closed, his wings folded at his sides. He was encased inside some sort of cocoon of the same bright green color as the goo we had found on the trail. As a breeze tossed the tops of the trees and scattered sunlight shone down, it glistened as well.

To both my relief and amazement, the sides of the pegasus slowly rose and fell. I willed my trembling hooves forward until I saw the pony's face more clearly: it was Strong Wing.

I realized the Crusaders were hiding behind me only when Apple Bloom poked her face out and said in a shaky voice, "I-is he ...?"

"He's alive," I said in a hushed voice. "But we need to get back to Ponyville and get him help right now."

Jump to top

Chapter 23 - Craziness Compounded

"Have ya gone plumb insane?!"

My ears drooped as I overheard Applejack let into her little sister.

"But we only wanted ta help Candy earn her cutie mark!" a cringing Apple Bloom whined.

"An' where do ya reckon that says yer senses hafta pack up and fly out yer ears?!"

"I'm sorry, Applejack. We didn't mean no harm. We didn't know changelings can k-kill ponies."

"That's not even the dang point!" Applejack snapped. "Changelings are dangerous, period. Ya might as well have gone after some wanted outlaw."

I sighed and turned away, sweeping my gaze over the others. When I had led the Crusaders out of the forest, all hell -- or rather, Tartarus -- had already broken loose. Twilight and her friends had already arrived, and the Ponyville sheriff had not been far behind.

I couldn't find Scootaloo. Earlier, a pegasus mare had swooped down on the little orange filly, berated her, then picked an argument with Rainbow Dash. Now a sullen Rainbow hovered off to the side with her forelegs folded over her chest. Scootaloo and the mare were nowhere to be seen.

My heart skipped a beat as my eyes beheld Rarity. Near her was an elegant sofa she had somehow conjured apparently just to faint upon after hearing what the Crusaders had tried to do. Now she loomed over poor Sweetie Belle, who cast her gaze downward. Even Pinkie Pie was frowning at her. That had to feel bad.

I took a deep breath and trotted over, my ears already swiveling towards Rarity's voice. "... done some strange things in the past, but words truly fail me this time. Honestly, Sweetie Belle, what were you thinking? Were you thinking at all?"

"We just wanted to help," Sweetie said in a tiny voice.

"And how was risking your lives supposed to accomplish this?"

Sweetie's eyes shifted towards me for a moment. "We thought Candy could handle it. We thought she had fought them before."

"Regardless of what you believed, it seemed you didn't consider your promise to me."

Sweetie Belle's gaze snapped up. "I kept my promise! Really, I did!"

Pinkie narrowed her eyes. "Just barely! You found all sorts of clever ways to skirt around that Pinkie Promise, missy!" She looked thoughtful for a moment before smiling at Rarity. "I was kinda impressed, to be honest. I'm almost surprised she didn't earn a cutie mark from it!"

Rarity rolled her eyes at Pinkie. "To borrow a line from my sister: not helping."

"Rarity, I'm sorry!" Sweetie cried. "Scootaloo had kinda exaggerated things a bit, and we thought--"

"Yes, I know all about how Rainbow filled that filly's head with nonsense about fighting changelings, but that's beside--"

Rainbow Dash zipped over to us. "Hey! Don't go blaming me for this! I've had enough of ponies yelling at me today. I never said anything to Scoots about Candy fighting changelings."

Rarity frowned. "Fine. My apologies."

I started to back away.

Rarity suddenly whirled around and glared at me. "And where do you think you're going?"

I blinked. "Er, huh?"

She stepped up to me. "I am quite disappointed in you, Candy."

My ears drew back. "What?? Wait, how is this my fault?!"

"If anypony here knows what can go wrong when they withhold information, it would be you."

I stared, dumbfounded. "You're kidding, right?"

"You knew Sweetie Belle and her friends were up to something. Really, you should've been alerted as soon as it became clear that their intent was to hunt and capture some creature, regardless of whether you knew they were after a changeling specifically."

"Wait a minute!" I protested, though I couldn't help but cringe a bit. "I had no idea! I'm new here, remember? As in new to this world!"

"New to this world?" Sweetie Belle repeated in confusion. "What's she talking about?"

"All the more reason you should've asked for clarification when it was clear you didn't understand," said Rarity. "Now I know--"

"But, wait, I--!"

"Don't. Interrupt."

My mouth snapped shut, my eyes wide.

Rarity sighed. "As I was about to say ... I know you're new here, Candy, and I'm trying to be sympathetic to that." She glanced to the side. "And I suppose some good did come of this."

I heard Sweetie Belle gasp, and I followed both ponies' gazes. My breath caught in my throat as two nurse ponies held a stretcher between them, on which lay Strong Wing. He had been removed from the cocoon, though green goo still clung to his fur and dripped to the ground as he was carried to a waiting wagon.

Rarity's voice drew my attention again. "From what you've told me, things are similar enough across both worlds that you should've at least questioned more closely what the Crusaders were doing. Certainly you know by now we wouldn't have judged you for your lack of knowledge."

Only stubbornness drove further protest in my head as if answering some inherent need to be contrary. Admittedly, a reflex attitude of "who the hell does she think she is" fueled much of my remaining vitriol. Well, I had the answer to that: she was my fosterer. Or would be, if the bureaucracy would cooperate.

What I didn't want to admit was that she was an adult, and I was the stupid kid. I had said I wanted to know what it was like to be an ordinary teenager. Unfortunately, that meant they sometimes thought they had all the answers and did dumb things. I supposed I had finally achieved a goal of sorts, then. Yay for me.

I lowered my gaze. "I'm sorry, Rarity."

"I know you meant well," Rarity said in a gentler voice. "And I'm happy to see you making friends. Just don't be afraid to question what they're doing if you think it's at all suspicious or dangerous."

I raised my eyes enough to see Sweetie Belle giving me a look that was sympathetic, but intensely curious as well.

I heard hoof-falls behind me. "Um, sorry to bother you," came Fluttershy's soft voice. "But Twilight wanted to talk to Candy when she has a moment."

I flicked my gaze downward again and lowered my head slightly. "I guess that depends on Rarity."

Rarity touched her hoof under my muzzle and gently lifted my head. "Go see what Twilight wants. I've said my piece. Just please try to use your head a little more."

I struggled against the lingering instinct that only I knew what was good for me. In the perfect, rational world, Rarity made absolute sense; I should have thought things through. I didn't have the fear of secrets being revealed to fall back on as an excuse. Despite the fact that a purpose had been served -- finding the real Strong Wing -- that had been little more than a happy accident.

So I wanted to believe at the time.

I gave Rarity a small and somewhat forced smile before turning away.

"I'm sure she's not that upset with you," Fluttershy said.

"I think she is," I said in a low voice.

"Well, um, maybe, but it won't last long. She really does care for you."

Would my own mother have reacted any differently? I wanted to think that she would have called me out on my shit just as effectively, which made me feel worse for screwing up.

"I know she does," I said in a quavering voice. I lifted my head. Twilight stood near the wagon as the nurses loaded Strong Wing inside. "I just have a lot to learn, that's all."

Fluttershy smiled. "Maybe the books Twilight gave you can help with that."

Unfortunately, some things I couldn't learn from a book. Like maturity.

The nurses climbed into the wagon. The two stallions hitched to it immediately set out, breaking into a full gallop when they reached the road back into Ponyville. Sunlight glinted from the pendant as Twilight turned towards us, and I struggled not to avert my eyes.

"The nurses said they believe Strong Wing will recover," said Twilight.

"Oh, thank goodness," Fluttershy said with a relieved sigh.

"He was drained quite a bit, but he's no worse off than Nurse Redheart was when she was found." Twilight turned to me. "Candy, you might be wondering how we got here so fast."

"Yeah, I was, but I can guess," I said. "The pendant, right?"

Twilight approached me. "It happened while I was performing the experiment I told you about yesterday. It fired a burst of magical energy towards the White Tail Woods. When I remembered you telling me that you and the Crusaders would be here this morning, I gathered my friends and we headed right over."

"So the pendant was responsible for what I saw?" I asked in a tense voice.

"So you did see something!" Twilight cried, and for just a moment, I resented her excitement. "What was it?"

In a halting voice, I described the apparition of Michelle.

"Oh, no," Fluttershy said in a hushed voice. "Candy, I-I'm so sorry you had to see her again like that."

"But it wasn't her!" I snapped. Fluttershy drew her ears back. I sighed and lowered my voice. "Sorry. It was just another stupid image that Starswirl's avatar used." I looked at Twilight. "Wasn't it?"

Twilight hesitated. "Well ... that's one theory, of course."

My heart raced, "B-but that had to be it. She even spoke archaic Equestrian, like you told me about in your dream. What else could it be?"

Twilight did not respond at first, and my blood ran cold.

"Twilight?" Fluttershy prompted softly. "Is something wrong?"

"No, it's fine," Twilight said, but her quavering voice said differently. She looked at me and sighed. "Candy, I'm not sure how to put this. I'm not completely sure myself what it means."

I simply stared, not trusting my voice.

"I only had a few moments to study that burst of magic," said Twilight. "But the pattern was very different from what I had sensed from Starswirl's avatar."

I swallowed hard, my tight throat clicking.

"It's possible there's a second entity in the pendant."

Fluttershy's pupils shrank to points.

"I-it's not her," I croaked.

"I'm not saying it is," Twilight said.

"It can't be her!"

"It probably isn't, but I won't know until I study the pendant more to--"

"My friend is dead!"

"I know," Twilight said in a very soft voice.

"Y-you said yourself, not even Starswirl could figure out how to do something like that!"

Twilight placed a hoof on my shoulder. "Candy, calm down, please. You're jumping to conclusions."

Fluttershy trembled. "B-but what if Cherry r-really is ...!"

I clenched my teeth to suppress the impulse to scream at her. I took a few deep breaths. Fine, I was a teenager again. That didn't mean I had to act like an angst machine or lash out at ponies who were trying to help. "I-I'm sorry, Twilight. I just ... I just want to put this all behind me, and all it wants to do is pull me in again."

"Candy, I really debated whether to tell you this," said Twilight.

I quelled the impulse to demand why she insisted on torturing me with this knowledge. "S-so what does this mean? Is there some sort of ... o-of avatar of Cherry in there?"

Twilight gave Fluttershy and I a perplexed look. "Cherry?"

"We came up with that name for my friend," I said. "Closest word in Equestrian that reminded me enough of her so I could give her a name."

Twilight smiled. "It sounds nice. But, yes, that's one explanation."

"So now what?" I demanded. "Is this thing going to keep torturing me like this?"

Fluttershy gave me a confused look. "But didn't she help you?"

"Yes, she did, I'm not denying that," I said in more of a curt voice than I had intended. "But seeing her constantly makes it harder for me to get over her passing."

"I believe the only reason she was able to appear to you is because of the energy I infused into the pendant," said Twilight in a contrite voice. "I had no idea this was going to happen. I'm not going to do it again without your consent."

I doubted I could make any sort of responsible decision. If it were up to me, I would have the pendant destroyed outright, if that were even possible. Maybe I should've done that from the beginning, or at least tried.

"What I'm more concerned about right now is the changeling," said Twilight. "My brother had swept the White Tail Woods just the day before. It took powerful illusion magic to conceal that camp."

I trembled. "But that changeling ... the one that killed Cherry ... was supposed to be good at magic, right?"

"Yes, but it supposedly entered the transport circle with Chrysalis after the summit. I had checked that circle myself before dispelling it. It had definitely taken two beings beyond the bounds of Equestria, and Rainbow and the Wonderbolts had seen Chrysalis and another changeling enter." She frowned. "Unless the second changeling went with Chrysalis instead somehow. That might explain why the vision referred to the changeling specifically as, um, Cherry's killer."

"Twilight?" Fluttershy said in a tentative voice. "From what Candy said, it sounded like the changeling was trying to lead them somewhere."

Twilight sighed. "Yes, I know."

"So how did Sweetie Belle find the camp if even Shining Armor couldn't?" I demanded.

Fluttershy gasped. "Unless S-Sweetie Belle is really a--!"

I held up a hoof. "No, Fluttershy, it's okay. The Crusaders had come up with code words to check for that sort of thing." Which, in retrospect, I had to admit was damn clever.

"And I scanned each of the Crusaders and Candy earlier," said Twilight. "None of them are changelings."

I gave her a surprised look. "You did? I didn't even notice."

Twilight smiled. "I've enhanced the spell. Now it gives me purely magical rather than visual feedback, so I can cast it without anypony seeing it."

As much as I wanted to deny the most important problem of all, Fluttershy had already broached the topic. "What about what Fluttershy said, that it was leading me somewhere? What exactly was it trying to do?"

I didn't really expect a definite answer, as much as my mind screamed for one. Twilight had little more than I did: a bunch of possibilities, none of which were very pleasant to contemplate.

"I don't know, Candy, I'm sorry," Twilight said. "Little about this makes sense. For now, I think we should get back to Ponyville. That's the safest place right now."

I sighed as I glanced at the White Tail Woods. I had hoped to escape the constant fear that had felt like a riptide trying to drown me no matter how hard I had fought against it. So the first attempt on my life hadn't been enough for that horrible thing? As much as I wanted to blame the pendant for bringing me here, the incident in the alley wouldn't have happened if I had not been set up. I had not wanted to think too hard on it for fear of my screwed-up head using it to fuel renewed resentment over winding up in Equestria, but I wasn't stupid. Who better to set me up than a creature who could make itself look exactly like me?

Why couldn't it just leave me alone? I wasn't even wearing the pendant anymore! Unless this was some sort of revenge for crossing Queen Chrysalis.

I headed back to Ponyville with the others. I tried to console myself with the fact that this time I didn't have to simply wallow in my emotions like I had before. This time I could call on somepony for help.

Though at that moment, it made me feel no less scared.

"Um, Candy?" said a contrite little country drawl behind me as the boutique came within sight. "Ya got a minute?"

I suppressed a sigh and turned around. All three Crusaders were together again, though Scootaloo looked particularly glum. Behind her hovered Rainbow Dash, a stern look on her face, her forelegs crossed. "What is it, girls?"

Apple Bloom glanced at the others before she stepped up to me. "I jus' wanna say I'm sorry fer the trouble we caused ya."

Sweetie Belle stepped next to her friend. "I'm sorry, too, Candy. I didn't realize it would get out of hoof like this."

"Um ... I, uh ..." Scootaloo mumbled, averting her eyes, her ears drooping.

"Go on," Rainbow said, thrusting a hoof forward. "Tell her!"

Scootaloo blushed and stepped forward. "Um ... C-Candy? I, uh, I'm sorry for telling the others you fought changelings when I never actually heard you did."

"We only wanted ta help ya get yer cutie mark, honest!" Apple Bloom said. "I mean, yeah, we kinda hoped we would, too, but we really wanted it ta be 'bout you."

Sweetie Belle gave me a forlorn look. "And I didn't want to see the fostering get messed up. We thought maybe if you had a cutie mark, it would help. And, um ... I was kinda looking forward to having another sister."

Dammit, no children of any world should be so cute, and my heart lurched at Sweetie's words. Why was I such a softie around them? Maybe I felt more affinity for their little circle than I wanted to believe. I still struggled with the idea that I could be so easily accepted.

"It's okay," I said in a quavering voice. "I kinda messed up myself, too."

"Candy, can I ask you something?" Sweetie Belle said.

I knew that was coming. "Sure."

"What was that stuff you said about a new world? Are you from a lot further away than Manehattan?"

I caught movement out of the corner of my eye as Rarity approached. Had she heard Sweetie's question? At my inquisitive look, she nodded. "Go ahead and tell them, if you wish."

I gave her a grateful smile and turned back to Sweetie Belle. "Well, yeah, you could say that. I'm not from Equestria. Or this planet. Before I showed up in Sweet Apple Acres that day, I wasn't even a pony."

All three Crusaders' mouths dropped open, and their pupils shrank. "Wow, really?" Scootaloo said in a hushed voice that sounded more curious than anything else.

"Yeah, really. It's kind of a long story how I got here, but let's just say this little trip wasn't exactly planned."

"Is that why yer sixteen an' ya don't have no cutie mark?" Apple Bloom asked.

"Maybe. I don't know. I'm still learning how this place works. Maybe it means I'll never get one."

"But that's just not fair!" Scootaloo cried. "Why turn you into a pony and not let you get a cutie mark?"

I smiled faintly. "I appreciate your concern, Scootaloo, but--"

"Now we really do gotta help ya!" Apple Bloom cried.

My smile faded. "Girls, please ..."

Scootaloo grinned and fluttered her wings. "Yeah, we should go back to the clubhouse right now and figure out something else for her to do!"

Sweetie Belle face-hoofed. "Um, Scootaloo? Our punishments, remember?"

Scootaloo's grin faded. "Oh, yeah, right."

I turned to Sweetie Belle. "Punishments?"

"We're all grounded for two weeks," Sweetie explained.

"Can't we appeal?" Scootaloo said.

Apple Bloom frowned. "Applejack said I either get grounded now or miss goin' ta the rodeo. I ain't missin' that! 'Specially since I was gonna invite y'all to go along with me."

Sweetie Belle trotted up to me. "I actually don't mind being grounded. It'll give me a chance to get to you know you better."

I tilted my head. "Really? After learning I'm an alien?"

Sweetie smiled. "Sure! You can tell me about your world, and I can tell you about Equestria."

Scootaloo suddenly rushed towards me. "Oh! In your world, do you have, like, giant claws or antennae that shoot lightning bolts?"

I blinked. "What?? No, I--"

"Or mebbe legs that end in suckers instead of hooves so ya can climb up walls!" piped Apple Bloom. "What 'bout those?"

"Um, no, I was nothing like--"

"Oo, I know!" Sweetie Belle cried. "Maybe she has lots of tentacles that can hold a dozen objects so she can do lots of things at once!"

Apple Bloom smiled. "She'd find her cutie mark in no time if she could do that!"

I face-hoofed. "Girls ..."

"Or she uses them to beat up a dozen bad guys at once while she fights crime!" Scootaloo cried.

"Ohmygosh, that would be sooo cool!" Rainbow Dash suddenly chimed in. "Just like the character that Daring Do teamed up with when Ahuizotl stole the priceless sapphire that turned out to be the power core of the alien's ship that she needed to ... um ... er ..."

Both Rarity and I had narrowed our eyes at Rainbow.

Rainbow smiled faintly and rubbed her mane. "Heh. Sorry."

I sighed and stepped towards the three fillies. "Listen to me, please. I was actually pretty ordinary back on my own world. And as for this one, well ..." I slowly smiled. "I really appreciate what you tried to do for me. But, honestly? Getting a cutie mark is just not a big priority for me right now. I've kinda got a lot of other things to worry about first." I lifted a hoof and glanced at it, smirking. "Like, you know, being a pony?"

Had anything I said made any sort of sense? Would they reject me and repudiate my membership in their little club? What did it say about me that I actually worried that I'd be excluded from a societal circle comprised of little kids who had more ambition than they had sense?

The Crusaders exchanged glances, and I could only guess as to the meaning of their thoughtful looks. I had known them for only a few days, but already I sensed it could mean anything from simple puzzlement to wild scheming. My tail twitched when my mind gravitated more towards the latter.

Apple Bloom and Scootaloo finally turned to Sweetie Belle, smiling. As if receiving some sort of unspoken message from her friends, she nodded once and turned to me. A smile graced her muzzle as well as she said, "Maybe we can help you with that, too. Being a pony, that is."

Scootaloo nodded. "Yeah, I mean, how hard can that be, right? We do it every day."

Apple Bloom grinned and waved a hoof. "Bein' a pony is as easy as fallin' off a log, trust me. You'll learn it it no time with our help!"

I couldn't help it. I burst out giggling. The Crusaders laughed as well.

And don't think I didn't notice that "too" you tacked on to your first statement, Sweetie Belle, you sneak. Getting them to stop scheming to help me earn my cutie mark likely had about as much chance of happening as asking the sun not to rise in ... that is ... as convincing Princess Celestia not to raise the sun the next morning.

Perhaps Rarity had noticed as well, as she gave me a sympathetic look.

"Scoots, we better get going," Rainbow Dash said. "I promised your parents you wouldn't be gone long." She rolled her eyes. "I'd rather not be yelled at again."

"I better head back to the farm," said Apple Bloom. "Seeya in two weeks, Crusaders!"

I smiled when her gaze included me as well. Was that a silly thing to be happy about?

Rarity stepped over to me as Apple Bloom and Scootaloo headed off. "I'm sorry if I seemed a bit harsh with you earlier, Candy."

I let my gaze linger on the departing fillies for another moment before turning to Rarity. "No, it's fine. You were right, I should've been thinking a little more clearly." I paused. "Does this mean I get punished, too?"

Rarity smiled. "Perhaps not, but I just may work you a little harder in the boutique for the next two weeks."

"Don't worry, Candy," said Sweetie Belle. "I'll be right there for moral support, just like in the forest earlier."

Rarity eyed her. "You mean you'll be working right alongside her."

Sweetie blinked. "I did? Um ... yeah, I guess I did."

I smiled at her. "You can help me with my magic."

"I was wondering why you were only learning that now. Is that because you came from another world?"

"Yeah. It's completely new to me. My world doesn't actually have any magic."

Sweetie gasped, but then narrowed her eyes. "Okay, now you're just having fun with me."

I giggled. "No, seriously. I'll see if I can explain it to you later."

"Well, anyway, I'm glad you're here. I really hope that mean old Spoiled Rich doesn't ruin it."

"Enough about that," said Rarity. "I don't want either of you worrying about it. Now, let's head home. It's not even afternoon and it already feels like it's been a trying day."

After my experience in the White Tail Woods, the idea of calling someplace "home" appealed to me far more than ever before. Since arriving in Equestria, I had needed a place I could feel safe, emotionally as well as physically. The castle had served the latter but not so much the former. I needed the former much more desperately than I had wanted to admit.

I hadn't dared to allow myself to feel safe since Michelle died. Maybe the changeling's mental block had never been complete. Maybe I always had a feeling I was in some sort of danger and didn't want it to affect anyone else. Yet I couldn't let my fear of bringing danger to others paralyze me further.

I had to trust that others knew what they were doing when I didn't.

Jump to top

Chapter 24 - A Loss And A Win

The soft patter of rain against the windows did little to disrupt Sweetie Belle's concentration as she held the piece of paper in her magic, carefully folding it as I had demonstrated moments before. I had to use my hooves, as my first attempt at something as intricate as folding paper with magic did little more than crumple it into a ball.

"There!" Sweetie said as she set our creation down between us. "I think I got it right."

I smiled as I cast a wistful gaze at it. "Only one way to find out." I enveloped the little paper airplane in my magic, lifted it high above our heads, and gave it a toss.

I had asked Sweetie to give the trailing vertical edge a slight bend to the left. The plane glided in a lazy half-circle before landing on Rarity's craft table.

Sweetie Belle smiled and clopped her fore-hooves together. "Neat!"

I marvelled at how well she had folded the paper. "I really hope I can do things with that sort of delicacy soon."

Sweetie's horn glowed as she picked up the plane. "Oh, you will, Candy, don't worry. You've learned to move stuff around much better in just the last few days." She set down the plane before us. "Did you really have bigger versions of this in your world that a whole bunch of ponies could sit in?"

"Oh, yeah. The biggest ones could easily hold hundreds of ponies."

"Wow! And fly all the way around the world?"

"Yeah. And they're made of metal, too."

Sweetie gave me a dubious look. "I thought you said your world doesn't have magic."

"It doesn't."

"But how would you keep all that heavy stuff in the air without it? I mean, I've seen a few things sorta like what you have in your world, but nothing that big or heavy."

Though I knew the basic idea behind how airplanes worked, I was no engineer. That the Equestrian language had some aeronautical terms meant the concepts were understood here (naturally, given that a third of ponies could fly). Unfortunately, that left me with having to describe how jet engines or turbo-props worked, and that definitely fell short in both my knowledge and the language. I fell back on Clarke's Law: any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic.

"You know something, Sweetie?" My horn glowed as I picked up the plane. "Maybe my world does have magic, just a different type. It's all in our machines instead of our bodies."

I tossed the plane into the air just as I heard the clop of approaching hooves from the hall. The plane arced around the room, overshot the table, and speared a purple mane to a surprised gasp.

"Um, sorry, Rarity," I mumbled as I plucked the airplane from her coiffure.

Rarity smiled. "It's okay, Candy. We should head over now so you're not late."

"Late?" Sweetie Belle inquired. "For what?"

"You didn't tell her?" said Rarity.

I slid a hoof through my mane. "I was kinda busy, uh, practicing magic."

"You can return to that later, of course."

"Oh, but, I, uh, was just getting really into it, you know? Sort of an in-the-zone kinda thing."

"Yes, I am well aware of how that can bring your focus to bear, but it is Tuesday, and--"

I thrust a hoof towards the window. "But it's raining."

Rarity narrowed her eyes. "Candy."

I sighed. I hated that tone of voice. "Yes?"

"You're stalling."

Fluttershy could have claimed all she wished that her weekly tea with Discord was a pleasant experience, but I still saw my meeting him as nothing less than a confrontation. I had looked up the creature in one of the books Twilight had given me. His appearance might as well have been a metaphor for my feelings concerning him.

Rarity must have seen my ears flatten, as she stepped up to me and gently placed a hoof on my shoulder. "I'll be with you the whole time, though Discord generally behaves himself around Fluttershy."

Sweetie's pupils shrank. "You're going to see Discord??"

"Apparently so," I said, unable to stop from giving Rarity a sullen look. Her horn glowed as she magicked a pair of rain coats into the room and draped one around me.

"If it helps any, I have some good news," Rarity said. She levitated an envelope before me. "The mail mare delivered a note from Town Hall. They appear ready to approve my application. I need only to answer a few remaining questions to their satisfaction."

Sweetie hopped onto her hooves. "That's not good news, that's great news!"

I glanced at the envelope. "Hey, um, maybe we should do that first so we make sure that--"

"Candy?" Rarity said.

"Um, yes?"

"Nice try. Let's go."

"Fine," I grumbled.

So what the hell does one say to a draconequus?

Never mind that this thing had catapulted me into this strange world. Was I stupid for debating it further? I had a better life in Equestria than I had on Earth, even without the consideration that I would be dead otherwise. Had Discord intervened merely to rescue me from the bullet and let me go on my merry human way, I would still be on the streets wondering what I was doing, where I was going, and blaming myself for Michelle's death.

Yet my hoof-falls became more clipped as I contemplated my extended stay. I glanced at Rarity as if to seek some sort of reassurance, but that just made my jaw tighten. Not that I really had anything to say. That morning had been the most I had said to her since the White Tail Woods incident from a few days ago.

Rain fell harder as we approached Fluttershy's cottage. Rarity frowned as she glanced at the bit of mud that had accumulated on her hooves. Unfortunately, this affront was not enough to deter her. My heart pounded when she knocked gently upon the door, and a new set of worries plagued me. My reading had suggested that I had been subjected to nowhere near the full range of Discord's reality-warping powers. Would he turn me into a potted plant or something if I upset him?

Or was something else driving my tumultuous emotions that morning?

Fluttershy appeared at the door, frowning. Rarity's eyes widened slightly as she said, "Darling, are you okay? Did Discord get out of hoof again?"

Fluttershy sighed. "He's not here."

Even though I let out a sigh of relief, I felt a vague sense of disappointment.

"Did something happen?" Rarity asked.

"We had a sort of argument," Fluttershy said in a reluctant voice. "I couldn't get him to tell me why he took Candy out of her world or what he knew of the pendant. Um, do you want to come in out of the rain?"

"I do," I said before Rarity could respond.

"I suppose we should get the whole story," said Rarity.

Fluttershy stepped aside. Rarity levitated the rain coats from us as we entered and hung them on hooks beside the door.

"Would you like some tea?" Fluttershy asked.

"We won't be staying long. I have some business at Town Hall," said Rarity. "Now what happened, dear?"

"Well, he wouldn't answer my questions, and when I told him Candy was on her way, he suddenly remembered he had some dishes in the sink he needed to unwash and left."

Did she say unwash?

Rarity clicked her tongue. "You certainly don't believe him, do you?"

Fluttershy lowered her gaze. "No, I guess not."

"Surely he must be up to something if he didn't want to meet Candy."

"Um, I don't think that's it. It was more like ... well ... he's avoiding her."

My eyes widened. Avoiding me? I felt almost insulted. He had turned me into a pastel-colored pony without my informed consent and then had the gall not to let me confront him?

"He wouldn't do that unless he had something to hide," Rarity declared. "Really, I know you want to see the best in him, Fluttershy, but it's quite obvious he simply doesn't want to tell us something important."

Fluttershy sighed and frowned again. "Yes, I know. It's so frustrating that I almost want to scream." She shook her head. "No, not almost. I do want to scream." She closed her eyes tight and opened her mouth wide. "Ahhhhh!"

...

I had heard empty libraries louder than that scream.

"Now that you've gotten that out of your system, dear," Rarity said in a gentle voice. "Did you find out anything at all?"

"Only that he definitely meant for the pendant to go along with Candy," said Fluttershy. "His exact words were: they're practically inseparable."

From his words in the alley, I had suspected he had never meant to separate me from the pendant. I had assumed he had an ulterior motive, but hearing it so starkly laid out -- and second hoof -- made me tremble with the desire to stomp my fore-hooves.

My own reaction startled me. I wasn't that resentful towards Discord. I had barely given the creature much thought before that morning, and now I almost wanted the confrontation.

"Are you okay, Candy?" Fluttershy asked.

"Not really," I said with a sigh. "But there's nothing you can do about it."

"I'm really sorry. I tried to get him to stay, but--"

"It's fine, Fluttershy, it's not your fault." I had no idea how to explain to her what I was feeling, as I didn't understand it myself. Nevertheless, Fluttershy gave me a concerned look as if she already knew something else was bothering me. Her eyes flicked between Rarity and I for a moment.

Rarity turned to me. "In that case, we won't let Discord disrupt our schedule further." Her horn glowed, and the rain coats covered us again. "We'll conclude our business at Town Hall and head back to the boutique."

"Oh, is your application about to go through?" asked Fluttershy.

"Yes, finally. Any further interference from Spoiled Rich should end today."

Fluttershy sighed. "I don't want to think that she did this just to be mean, but--"

"That mare does nothing without a clear intent," Rarity declared. "It doesn't matter, as I have things under control now. Though it's fortunate that word of Candy's involvement in the incident in the White Tail Woods did not get back to her."

My teeth clenched again, and I forced myself to look away from Rarity. As I sought something else to focus on, my gaze found Fluttershy's concerned eyes. I opened my mouth briefly, but closed it without saying a word. My ears flattened slightly as I flicked my gaze over to Rarity for a moment before lowering it to the floor.

"Well, we best be off," Rarity said.

"Um, Rarity?" Fluttershy said. "Can I talk to you for a moment before you leave?"

"Yes, but please make it quick. We ought not delay."

When I heard nothing more, I looked up. Fluttershy looked first to me and then back to Rarity. "Um ... I need to speak to you alone," she said in a softer voice.

Rarity sighed. "Fluttershy, we really ought to--"

"It's important. Please."

Rarity hesitated, then nodded. "Very well. Candy, I'll just be a moment."

I frowned as Fluttershy and Rarity stepped into another room together. Now what? Had I done something else wrong?

The rain slackened as we trotted into downtown Ponyville, though the skies had yet to clear, at least from what I saw the only time I chose to glance up. Moisture still swaddled us like a damp blanket, and bits of fog swirled around our hooves.

"Candy," Rarity said in a subdued voice.

"What?" I snapped without looking up.

"You're upset."

"No, I'm not."

"You're not very good at hiding your feelings, Candy." She paused. "If it seems like I hadn't noticed before, I was otherwise preoccupied."

I rolled my eyes and sighed. "I really didn't want to see Discord this morning."

"I know, but that's not it."

I squeezed my eyes shut for a moment. Why couldn't she just accept that? I opened my mouth to say something but closed it without uttering a word.

"Really, there's no point in brooding over it, Candy. I'd much prefer you just--"

Dammit. Fine.

I stopped and stomped a hoof, splashing water. I whirled around to face her. "Okay, yeah, I'm upset!" I hesitated and hated myself for it. What the hell was I still afraid of? She was right, I had been brooding over this for a few days and just didn't want to admit it. The prospect of seeing Discord again had just been a catalyst. "I knew I screwed up with the Crusaders, but I did get them out of there safely."

Rarity slowly smiled. "Yes, you did."

"I just ... I feel like ... I don't know, like you ignored it, like it didn't mean anything."

My ears flattered as if I expected a renewal of her anger. Instead, her eyes glistened as she stepped closer to me. "You're right. I did fail to note what you did. And I'm sorry."

I simply stared at her in surprise.

"Let's just say Fluttershy had a few choice words to say to me," said Rarity in a somber voice.

My eyes widened. "Fluttershy said something to you? Was that what that secret conversation was about?"

"Yes. Perhaps she's not normally very assertive, but she sticks up for those she cares about. Even if it means telling a friend she made a mistake."

I wished Fluttershy were there so I could give her a hug. What she had done sounded a lot like what Michelle would have done for me.

"Concerning the Crusaders, I do still think you should have thought things out more," said Rarity, though her voice held little reproach. "But you rose to the occasion when it mattered, and that deserved acknowledgement. Thank you ensuring Sweetie Belle and her friends returned safely. You did well dealing with three frightened fillies."

I smiled faintly. "Believe me, I was still plenty scared myself."

"All the more reason I should have noted your actions. In my defense, I've never had to deal with somepony like you before."

"An alien?"

"No. A teenager."

I couldn't help but grin. "If it helps any, I've heard adults on my world say teenagers might as well be alien life forms."

Rarity chuckled. My smile widened. I really didn't want to be angry with her. She had a point; we're both new at this. In my case, in more ways than one.

"So how about we both admit we made mistakes and move on?" said Rarity.

"Deal," I said.

As we approached Town Hall, the rain stopped, and some breaks appeared in the clouds as pegasi bucked holes in the overcast. More fog rose from the glistening pavement under shafts of golden sunlight. Twilight emerged from the entrance and smiled as she trotted over to us. "Morning, Rarity, Candy."

Rarity smiled. "Good morning, Twilight."

"Morning, Twilight," I said. "Um, if you don't mind me asking, what were you doing in Town Hall?"

Her horn glowed, and she drew an envelope from her saddlebags. "Likely the same thing that brought Rarity here. I received a letter requesting that I answer a few questions concerning her fostering application."

"Indeed?" Rarity said with a small smile.

She tucked the envelope away. "Mostly they wanted to know about Candy."

My tail twitched. "Do I even want to know what they asked?"

"They wanted my assessment as to, um, any sort of magical threat you might pose."

My heart lurched, but Rarity appeared unperturbed as she said, "I trust you assuaged their fears?"

"Of course," Twilight said in a cheerful voice. She turned to me. "Regardless of your origins, Candy, you most definitely appear in all respects to be an ordinary unicorn filly."

I grinned. "I'm not even as dangerous with sharp objects now."

Both Rarity and Twilight laughed. "I honestly don't think you'll have any trouble now, Rarity," said Twilight.

"In that case, no time like the present." Rarity turned to me. "This shouldn't take long. You can stay out here if you wish."

"Yeah, that's fine," I said.

Rarity nodded and trotted towards the entrance.

"Now that the rain has let up, I need to head to the marketplace," said Twilight. "I'll see you later."

"Later, Twilight," I said.

I took a deep breath. This was finally going to be over. Despite having already accepted Rarity as my fosterer, making it official sent a few lingering butterflies flitting through my stomach. The permanence of the arrangement comforted me, but would it make my final decision that much harder? I still didn't know if Equestria was where I wanted to spend the rest of my life.

A pony brushed by me and jolted me out of my thoughts, and I realized I stood in the main thoroughfare of ponies coming and going. I turned to extricate myself from the Ponyville equivalent of rush hour, only to nearly run into an elegantly dressed pink earth mare with a purple mane and a turned-up muzzle.

"Oh, sorry," I said, backing up a step.

She narrowed her eyes at me. "Do you always stand in the way of ponies going about important business?" she said in a haughty voice.

My tail twitched, and I backed up another step. "Um, no?"

She lifted her head slightly and looked down her muzzle at me. "Hmph. Obviously a teenager from the low-brow section of town. No sense of purpose or her proper place."

Wow. I didn't want to know the size of the stick she had up her tail. I simply muttered another "sorry" as I stepped more fully aside. She cast a final icy gaze at me before trotting past.

I turned back towards Town Hall and stumbled back a half-step when I found the earth mare now staring at me. She thrust a fore-hoof towards me. "You! You're her!"

"I ... what??"

"You're the pony who dared to insult not only my daughter but myself as well!"

Oh ... shit.

The mare that could only be Spoiled Rich stared at me as if I were a piece of dirt she happened to find on her hoof. "You are proof of exactly what I've been saying all along, that this town is turning into little more than a haven for random beggars and vagabonds unless ponies like me do something about it."

My ears drew back so hard they ached, my eyes wide and shimmering. At the same time, I scraped a fore-hoof as if I wanted to charge. "Look, I ... I don't want to cause any trouble, I--"

She loomed over me, forcing me to back up another step. "Don't you dare talk back to me. I will not be insulted by the likes of a miserable transplant blank-flank non-entity like you."

My lips twitched into a frown that I barely resisted turning into a snarl. I forced myself to take a deep breath. Maybe asserting myself to Rarity had been the right thing to do, but I didn't have to go spoiling for a fight, not when she was moments away from resolving this mess.

"If you ever say another disparaging word towards my daughter, you will consider yourself fortunate that ejecting you from Ponyville is all that I will see done with you."

My New York upbringing had possibly driven my reaction to Diamond Tiara that day. My mother -- and a lot of New Yorkers -- tended not to take shit from anyone. And, honestly, the hurt look on Scootaloo's face had been too much. Yet I forced myself to quell that instinct here.

But just barely.

"I have no intention of speaking to your daughter ever again, Mrs. Rich," I said in a quavering voice through clenched teeth. I had to keep reminding myself: she was the adult here, despite her acting like a word that rhymed with her last name even in the Equestrian language. Yeah, just my luck; a translatable swear word, and I couldn't even use it.

Spoiled Rich snorted. "You will not have the chance if I have anything to say about it. It's not enough that you're a blank-flank transplant. You're also of unknown, and likely questionable, parentage."

My head whipped up. "What?!"

"Even if your blood line could be established, I have my doubts it would be from anywhere but the absolute dregs of Equestrian society."

My teeth ground so hard my jaw ached. I tried to remind myself she likely had no idea I was an alien or that my mother was dead.

It didn't work.

I stomped a fore-hoof and glared at her. "Listen, you overbearing, stuck-up, loud-mouthed--"

Spoiled Rich recoiled. "You dare speak to me like--?!"

"Don't interrupt! I-I don't care what you think of me, just don't ever--!"

Rarity's voice suddenly rang out. "Mrs. Rich, kindly step away from my fosterling. Now."

Goddammit, Rarity! Let me do this! I really needed to ... I ...

... wait, what did she just call me?

My heart raced as Rarity marched up to us, a document held in her magic. I swallowed hard, not daring to believe what it could be. Rarity gave me a quick smile before turning her full attention to Spoiled Rich, and her eyes blazed.

Spoiled Rich turned towards her and snorted. "Your fosterling? This foul-mouthed little miscreant? Not if I have anything to say about it!"

She drew back when Rarity thrust the document at her face, her pupils shrinking as she barely avoided being plastered in the muzzle. All I could make out from where I stood was a seal near a top corner and a signature at the bottom.

"Fortunately, you don't," Rarity declared. "Kindly note the signature at the bottom of this document formally approving me as Candy Swirl's fosterer. It is not from some lowly clerk or random functionary, but from Mayor Mare. Your challenge ends here and now."

My heart fluttered. This was actually going to happen? I drew in a deep, quaking breath, my eyes misting, only to have my emotional tumult cut short by ...

... the smell of buttered popcorn??

"Want some?" a voice squeaked to my right.

I turned my head. Pinkie Pie was seated in a folding chair next to me, one hoof extended towards me offering me a box of popcorn, the other hoof curled around a banner that read "TEAM RARITY."

As if answering my unspoken question, Pinkie smiled and said, "I missed the last two times Rarity ripped a pony a new one. I'm not missing this!"

I had the satisfaction of seeing Spoiled Rich too stunned to speak at first, though the moment didn't last. She backed up a step, her eyes narrowing as if she somehow expected the document to burst into flame from the power of her glare alone. "You wouldn't have accomplished this if it weren't for the fact that you have a Princess of Equestria in your saddlebag," she snarled.

Rarity rolled up the document into a scroll with a snap before yanking it away. "And what of it? Two can play at these tawdry political games. My only regret is having to soil my hooves with the same dirty tactics you wallow in."

"Oo, good one!" Pinkie murmured. She reached over to a scoreboard next to her and flipped a "1" into the slot marked with a little picture of Rarity's face.

Spoiled Rich maintained her haughty demeanor despite the shifty look in her eyes. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Oh, really, now?" Rarity said in a voice of such ice even my own ears drew back despite knowing I was not the target. "Then it must be mere coincidence that you applied for the vacant seat on the Ponyville Town Council on the same day that Candy showed up."

I raised an eyebrow. She did what now?

Rarity took a step towards Spoiled Rich. "It's not enough you throw your weight around on the school board just to have a ridiculous visage of your daughter placed in stained glass at the schoolhouse--"

"You dare call my Diamond Tiara ridiculous?!"

"No, I'm calling you ridiculous!"

Both mares had advanced on each other that their muzzles nearly touched. I sat down and helped myself to the popcorn Pinkie offered. Maybe I was still a little disappointed I didn't get the chance to tell off Spoiled Rich myself, but Rarity did it with far more flair than I could have accomplished.

"How dare you use an underaged pony as your political pawn!" Rarity thundered. Her horn glowed, and an envelope appeared from her saddlebag. At first I assumed it was the letter she had shown me earlier until I realized the envelope was a different color. "I did my own inquiries when I realized I had no idea why you would even care this much about one pony despite her lack of documentation or cutie mark. Imagine my surprise when I learned you were using invented dangers of her arrival as a means to ingratiate yourself to the Council!"

"And why not?!" Spoiled Rich roared. "For too long this town has been a refuge for the dregs of Equestrian society! I am only--!"

Rarity rolled her eyes. "Oh, spare me your tired rhetoric. You simply wanted to further your own power."

Spoiled Rich slowly smiled. "I will tell you the same thing I tell my Diamond: A Rich pony always thinks of her social standing. I always believed you were concerned about your own standing as well. It was the one thing I respected about you. Apparently, I was wrong."

Rarity narrowed her eyes. "Perhaps I occasionally do like to bump shoulders with the creme of Canterlot nobility, but I refuse to do so at the expense of others. Apparently, those on the Council -- and Mayor Mare -- believe as I do."

Spoiled Rich ground her teeth. "If you for one moment think I will let you attempt to sway the Council into rejecting my membership--!"

"I don't have to. You've already done a splendid job yourself."

"What are you talking about?!"

"You made it quite clear you were not interested in real facts, only imagined threats without a shred of proof behind them. Perhaps that worked when everypony was frightened of changelings, but not now. Once they had a chance to think about it, they found they wished more integrity from prospective council members." Rarity lifted her muzzle in the air and stepped past Spoiled Rich. "Now, run along and ... well, do whatever it is you do for this town. Celestia knows I've never figured it out."

I snorted and clamped my jaw shut against the laugh that would have otherwise escaped. Pinkie giggled softly and flipped another number on the scoreboard.

Spoiled Rich glared at Rarity's back. "This is not the last you'll hear from me!"

Rarity rolled her eyes. "Obviously, as I can still hear you talking. Let's say I take Candy home now and rectify that problem, hmm?"

"I am still chairpony of the school board!" Spoiled Rich yelled. "I will use my influence there to set this town to rights! What do you have to say to that?!"

Pinkie looked thoughtful and rubbed her chin with the back of a hoof. "Hmm. I'd say your delivery is good, and you're definitely loud enough, but your follow-through is kinda weak." Pinkie smiled. "It also doesn't help that you're a big poopy-head, but, eh, nopony's perfect."

My eyes were tearing and my sides ached from suppressed laughter.

Spoiled Rich growled and stomped a hoof. "I will not waste my time any further with such low-life ponies. Mark my words, Miss Rarity, you will regret this day, even if I have to work through Diamond Tiara to do it!"

With a final snort, she raised her muzzle in the air and marched away.

My mirth quickly died. "That's not going to cause trouble for Sweetie Belle and her friends, is it?"

Rarity sighed. "That insufferable mare has been trying her best to gain the upper hoof via the school board for some time now. She may have her daughter stir up trouble in the fall when it comes time to elect a student pony president. We'll worry about that when and if it happens."

Pinkie hopped off her chair and bounced over to us. "Maybe the Crusaders can help by, um, I dunno, helping somepony oppose Diamond Tiara so she goes down in a humiliating defeat only to reveal that she's had all this hidden pain about who she really is and after a dramatic musical number she totally turns around and becomes their friend and the Crusaders even earn their cutie marks doing it and I get to host the biggest cuteceañera ever!" She threw her fore-hooves in the air and gave us a big smile.

We stared at Pinkie for a few moments before Rarity broke the silence. "Yes, well, I believe we've made enough of a scene. Shall we head home, Candy?"

"That's it?" I said, my heart thumping. "It's done?"

Rarity smiled. "Yes, it's done. I am officially your fosterer now."

"But do I still need to keep quiet about--"

"You need not concern yourself with hiding your origins," said Rarity. "And I'm sorry I made you think you needed to."

"I don't understand."

"I had foolishly assumed Spoiled Rich had managed to raise what other ponies might consider real concerns about you," said Rarity. "When I discovered that it was little more than a ploy for political power, I decided to tell them the truth about you. They were far more impressed with my honesty than her bombast."

"Wait, was that why you didn't bat an eye at what they asked Twilight about me?"

"Indeed. In fact, I expected as much."

"But you made Spoiled Rich think you used Twilight to influence things."

Rarity sighed. "Sadly, ponies like her don't understand how friendship works at all. It was better to use terms she did understand and, well ..." She smiled. "If she goes off thinking I have sizable influence in town, so much the better for me."

I sat quietly in both appreciation and at least some measure of awe, not just at her prowess in dealing with Spoiled Rich, but at myself. I had actually managed to relinquish control over something, and it worked out in the end.

I stared at Rarity's face. It was nothing like my mother's face. I didn't mean the difference in species. Emotions played in her eyes differently. Her mouth shaped her unspoken thoughts differently. Despite the similarities in personality, now that I had come to know her better, she really was a different person. Yet I had trouble seeing her as the big sister I thought I had wanted. Maybe I didn't want to admit that I needed something more than an older sibling. I never had an older sister and could only guess at how it felt.

But I did know what having a mother felt like.

"Candy? Are you--?"

I bolted over to Rarity and thew my forelegs around her. "Thank you," I whispered.

I felt Rarity's forelegs squeeze me tightly even as the words left my lips. "You're very welcome, my dear," Rarity whispered back, her voice quavering slightly.

I heard a sniffle, and then Pinkie's voice. "Awwwww ..."

I smiled as we gently broke off the embrace. Pinkie gave me a hug as well.

"Let's head home, Candy," said Rarity.

I nodded. "Yes, let's."

Pinkie bounced along beside us. "You know, that stuff I said about the Crusaders and Diamond Tiara totally could happen!"

"You'll forgive me if I don't place bits on that," said Rarity.

I barely paid attention to their conversation as the pegasi cleared the last of the clouds, and the sun again shone down from an azure sky. I still had a smile on my muzzle, perhaps the longest I had sustained one since coming here.

I wasn't even upset over Discord avoiding me. Fine, let him. I didn't need to confront him as much as perhaps others thought. I had enough to worry about, like what was really going on with my pendant.

But that would keep for now. I wanted to enjoy these good feelings a little longer.

Jump to top

Chapter 25 - Surprises

Sweetie Belle's soft giggle -- at least before she planted her hoof to her muzzle to silence it -- alerted me that I looked a bit silly with my tongue sticking out of the corner of my mouth. Nevertheless, I didn't let it break my concentration as I carefully folded a remnant of delicate fabric using only magic. Once I was done, I levitated it to the top of a pile of similarly folded scraps, five in all. As the glow of my horn finally faded, Sweetie Belle clopped her hooves together. "That's great, Candy!"

I smiled. "Thanks."

"Did you want to try the other exercise Rarity suggested?"

"Suggested" was a loaded word here. Rarity had pretty much set my magic training in stone. She expected me to perform a specific set of exercises each morning, so I had little choice. I had trusted at first that she knew best, but it still seemed rather tedious. I glanced at the craft table where two large bolts of fabric sat. "Sure you don't want that helmet again?"

Sweetie smiled and waved a hoof. "You'll be okay. Try it!"

I really had come a long way despite my grumbling. A little over a week had passed since the fostering became official. Another Tuesday had come and gone, and Discord had again vanished before I could get to Fluttershy's place. I still hoped to convince Rarity not to bother anymore, though she rarely entertained notions to change my schedule.

I stepped towards the craft table. I took a deep breath, and my horn glowed as I grabbed the first bolt. I paused before enveloping the second one. It wobbled as it rose but quickly steadied until both floated serenely a few hoof-widths above the table.

"You got it!" Sweetie cried.

I felt fairly confident I could do this. Yet what was the reward? An ability to rearrange Rarity's supplies better? I knew I had to walk before I could run -- or maybe that was trot before I could canter -- but should I be approaching this differently? No, this was what Rarity told me I needed to do. She knew best, after all.

My thoughts distracted me enough that the bolts wobbled.

"Well, you almost got it," Sweetie said.

I banished any further troubling thoughts from my mind, and my hold solidified. I raised one bolt, rotated it, and slid it into its receptacle. The other bolt wobbled. I seized it too hard, and the edge I had neatly folded earlier came undone. I considered it a partial win and moved it into its receptacle anyway.

"That was pretty good," Sweetie Belle said.

"Eh, it could've been better," I said.

"Well, it's the first time you tried two objects that big at the same time. You're picking it up fast."

I smiled faintly. "Thanks, I appreciate it."

She gave me a curious look. "Something wrong?"

Sweetie was really sharp for a kid. She picked up on my emotions almost as well as Fluttershy, though I didn't try very hard to hide them from her. "Maybe I should be further along by now."

"Really, you're doing great. You're picking it up about as fast as I did."

I believed her, but it didn't help. Before I could try to put my feelings into words, Rarity entered from the hall. "Sorry to interrupt, but I need to run an errand, and I was going to take Sweetie Belle with me."

"An errand?" Sweetie asked in confusion.

Rarity sighed. "The errand we spoke of the other day?"

Sweetie smiled. "Oh, that errand!"

"What errand?" I asked. "Want me to come along?"

"Nope, we don't need you at all," Sweetie declared. "Er, I mean, you don't need to worry about it. Not one bit."

"Sweetie," Rarity said softly.

"Has nothing to do with you, Candy. Nope, not a single thing."

"Sweetie!"

"Just pretend the errand doesn't even exist. We never need to speak of it again."

"Sweetie Belle!"

Sweetie whirled around. "What? I'm just trying to--"

"Never mind what you're trying to do," said Rarity with a smile. "Just come along."

I tilted my head. "Um, are you sure you don't want me to come along?"

Rarity glanced at the shelf. "I'm quite sure, Candy," she said as her horn glowed. She grabbed the second bolt I had put away. "As I need you to do me a favor while we're gone." She slid the bolt out, tucked the loose end in, and slid the bolt back. "I have an order at Sugarcube Corner that will be ready for me later this morning, and I'd like you to pick it up for me."

"Well, okay," I said in a dubious voice. "As long as you trust my magic that far."

"It'll be fine, Candy," said Rarity. "But clean your room first."

"Okay, I ... er, what?"

"I believe you heard me."

I stared. "You're kidding, right? All I have are the books Twilight gave me."

"Yes, and they're all over the place. How you find anything in that mess is beyond me. I would prefer you keep it orderly a bit more often."

"Maybe you should've added it to my schedule," I grumbled.

"I'm sorry?"

I rolled my eyes. "Nothing. I'll go clean my room."

Rarity smiled. "Excellent. I'll see you later. Come along, Sweetie."

Sweetie gave me a sympathetic look before trotting out of the room alongside Rarity. I sighed as I heard them head out the front door of the boutique.

I trotted up to my room. Admittedly, my filing system consisted of levitating books from my bed to a random spot on the floor when I needed to sleep. The room did have a bookshelf, so I really had no excuse other than laziness. Having to clean my room really didn't upset me, so why did I feel so sullen? Wasn't I supposed to be past my angsty phase?

After a few false starts as I pondered a filing system, I gave up and fell back on "in whatever order I pick them up." I levitated the books one by one to the shelf, finishing about half the task before I picked up the book on historical fashion trends.

I bit my lower lip as I stared at it. I finally tossed it onto the bed and jumped after it, flipping it open with a hoof and paging through it. The book not only described the fashion of the time, but the techniques used to work with textiles as well, even down to the way the stitching was done.

I ran a hoof down a page showing a unicorn craftspony guiding a needle through fabric. My mind's eye refused to envision fingers I no longer had as it might have during my first few days in Equestria. I wanted to see my horn as a substitute, but its dexterity had yet to approach what I had lost, leaving me in a sort of limbo.

I sighed softly and closed my eyes. I could see myself working side-by-side with Rarity, helping her create her wonderful designs. Yet what exactly was I hoping for, self-fulfillment or approval? Maybe when she had said she would "work me harder in the boutique," I had expected something more substantial than drudge work, which seemed to be all my magic training was suited for so far.

I opened my eyes, frowned, and closed the book. I could over-think a sunny day if I were given half the chance. I didn't have time for this anyway; I had that favor to do for Rarity. I hopped off the bed and arranged the remaining books as fast as my nascent magical skills would allow.

The late morning sun felt warm on my fur, the sky crystal clear and devoid of even a single cloud, which was unusual; the pegasi generally left a puffy cloud or two about. Rainbow Dash had claimed they did that "for a bit of variety." The number of times I saw her prismatic tail hanging down from one suggested an ulterior motive.

A walk through Ponyville reminded myself how strange my environment still seemed, even disregarding the colorful equine population. Towering edifices of steel and glass that cast long shadows even at noon had dominated my childhood landscape; rumbling fleets of cars had filled the air with the tang of exhaust; throngs of people had spared others little more than a disinterested glance.

Here, I could see the mountains from almost anywhere in town. The air held only the smell of the natural foliage, or the aromas of produce in the marketplace, or -- when the wind was right -- the sweet smell of apples. Ponies greeted me by name, even though I barely knew most of them, even as much as Rarity reminded me who they all were.

Not that I hated the differences. Honestly, I didn't. I simply struggled to make them seem more familiar to me.

Sugarcube Corner appeared strangely dark, more so than the shade in which it sat could account for, and bereft of the usual stream of ponies coming and going. Even the shades were drawn. Was the place closed for some reason?

I stepped up to the door and touched the latch with my hoof. It opened easily. Frowning, I nudged open the door and stepped into the dark store.

The lights suddenly snapped on.

"SURPRISE!"

I stumbled back in shock, and only a quick hug from Pinkie Pie prevented me from tumbling right back out the door onto my haunches. I stared wide-eyed at the array of ponies crowded into the store as Pinkie plopped a party hat over my horn. My gaze finally found the huge banner hanging from the ceiling that read "WELCOME TO PONYVILLE!" Successive pieces of paper had been taped under the last word which read "AND EQUESTRIA," "AND PONYKIND," "AND BEING FOSTERED."

Pinkie leaned close to me. "Personally, I wanted to do four parties for you, but the others convinced me to do one big one."

Her words were slow to penetrate my daze. I blushed from all the eyes upon me despite their smiling faces. "I ... um, th-thank you!"

"Are you surprised?" Pinkie asked hopefully.

"Yes, very. I honestly had no idea you were serious when you mentioned holding a party for me."

"Oh, I'm always serious when I talk about parties," Pinkie chirped. "Partying is serious business! Well, it's a ton of fun, too, but it's still serious business."

Coming from her, that made a strange sort of sense.

Rarity smiled as she hugged me. The rest of the six were with her as well. "I'm happy you're okay with this, dear. I tried to find out if you ever had parties like this back home without spoiling the surprise."

My eyes misted, but I avoided shedding tears. I had told Rarity a few days ago how my mother had never failed to find the time to celebrate my birthday. I had not told her how my mother had missed my last one before she died. I shoved that dark thought aside, though not before my ears drew back, and concern glistened in Rarity's eyes. I smiled and hugged her. "It's fine, this is really nice," I said softly.

Applejack stepped up and drew me into a hug almost as soon as I broke off the one with Rarity. "Candy, I jus' wanted ta thank ya."

"Um, okay. For what?"

"Apple Bloom told me how ya handled yerself in the forest once ya saw the danger. Mighty glad ya kept yer wits about ya an' made the good decision ta get 'em outta there safely."

I saw frantic waving behind her. Apple Bloom stood with her fellow Crusaders, all smiling at me. Even Scootaloo was there.

"We convinced Scoot's parents to let her attend the party," Rainbow Dash said.

"An' I figgered it would be only fair to let Apple Bloom come," said Applejack.

"Applejack, seriously, thank you for what you said about the forest," I said in a quavering voice.

Applejack smiled. "Let's jus' say I got some good advice from a friend 'bout that."

"Huh? What do you ...?"

I trailed off when Fluttershy stepped up to me. She smiled and blushed faintly. "I, um, might've talked to another pony or two."

I swallowed hard, my eyes watering. Dammit, they were going to make me cry anyway. I hugged Fluttershy tightly. "Th-thank you."

"You're very welcome, Candy," Fluttershy said. "I'm glad I could help."

Even though she had already done this for me with Rarity, that she would stand up for me to others despite her shyness meant the world. Now I just had to figure out how to stand up for myself.

"Candy?" I heard Twilight say as she trotted up to me. "I really am sorry I haven't contacted you. I'm still working on understanding the pendant."

The outpouring of good feelings had banished my darker thoughts about the pendant. I hugged her as I said, "It's okay. I've kinda been focused on other things lately."

Her smile widened, though her voice betrayed a hint of disappointment when she spoke. "It's been harder to figure out than I thought. I've, um, had to ask for some help. The magic used to forge the thaumic matrix is proving to be of a kind that I hadn't seen before, and it may represent a fusion of techniques spanning multiple disciplines of--"

"Jeez, Twi, do you always have to be in egghead-mode?" Rainbow said with a roll of her eyes.

Pinkie threw her forelegs around Twilight and I. "Dashie's right! No talking shop! Time to get the party girl some punch and cake!"

Twilight conceded with a nod despite the subdued look on her face. As much as I sympathized with her frustration, I wanted to go a little longer without having to think about it.

Pinkie started to steer me towards a table with enough confectionery to feed Ponyville several times over when Rainbow suddenly hovered before me. "Hey, wait a minute! Don't I get a hug, too?"

Before my stunned brain could think of a reply, she settled on her hooves, smiled, and drew me into an embrace. "You really were awesome in how you stood up to Bugs McUgly at the summit. But, um, don't go up against any more changeling queens if you can help it, okay?"

I giggled. "I'll do my best, I promise."

"Hey, Candy, over here!"

I lifted my head towards the sound of Sweetie Belle's voice and found her seated at a table with her fellow Crusaders. She waved a hoof and gestured for me to come over.

I turned to Fluttershy, who had adopted the unofficial role of chaperon, much to my relief. Even though this party reminded me of how I had started hobnobbing with my mother's friends at her formal gatherings as young as ten, it still felt a bit overwhelming. "Mind if we stop by to see them?"

Fluttershy smiled. "Not at all. I'm ready to get away from the crowd for a little while myself."

Pinkie suddenly appeared before me as if by magic (or maybe really by magic; I swear she had some sort of teleportation ability) with a small plate balanced on her fore-hoof. "You haven't tried one of these yet! I made them especially for you."

I stared down at the confection, a blueberry cupcake with swirled red and orange frosting. It looked and smelled delicious, but my stomach was already distended from consuming more sweets than any being in any universe should have an ability to ingest.

"Um, Pinkie?" said Fluttershy. "Maybe she can take that home with her after the party."

"Oh, I already got lots of stuff I'm gonna send home with her," Pinkie said as she gestured towards the end of the table. My eyes glazed as I stared at a pile of treats half again as much as what I had already eaten. Was she trying to give me diabetes?

Before I could respond, the plate was suddenly suffused in unicorn magic and lifted from Pinkie's hoof. "I believe Candy's had quite enough sugar for one day," Rarity said as she stepped forward.

"Awww," Pinkie said in disappointment. "I'm trying to make up for all the parties she missed."

"Yes, well, I'd rather she not get sick."

"I don't think I'd get sick on just one more cupcake," I muttered.

"Now, Candy, I don't think you want to overdo it," Rarity said.

"It's only one cupcake," I said, my ears flattening.

"I'm thinking of your well-being, dear."

"Can't I be the judge of that?"

"I simply want to avoid you feeling discomfort later. Is that such a bad thing?"

"Um, Rarity?" Fluttershy said. "Maybe let Candy decide?"

I bit off my last retort in the wake of Fluttershy's comment. Rarity hesitated, her eyes suddenly uncertain. She uttered a soft sigh and levitated the plate towards me. "Very well."

I glanced down at the cupcake. "Pinkie, could you please add that to the stuff that you're sending home with me?"

Pinkie lifted her hoof and balanced the plate on it once more. "Okey-dokey!" she said before disappearing into the crowd.

My gaze flicked between Fluttershy and Rarity during the ensuing moment of awkward silence. My emotions vacillated between pride over standing up for myself and embarrassment over arguing over something silly. A party was not really the time and place for this sort of conflict, but my emotions never could be put on a timetable. "You really don't have to worry about me that much."

"Why did you argue in the first place when you apparently had already decided against having the cupcake?" Rarity said, her voice tinged with exasperation.

"That's not the point!" I cried.

"Then just what is the point, as I'm failing to see it."

Was I simply making a big deal out of something trivial? As usual, it took me time to sort out my own feelings. "The point is, I made the decision myself."

"Well, yes," said Rarity. "You agreed with me that--"

I face-hoofed. "No! You still don't get it, I ... um ..." I thought back to the praise Applejack had given me earlier, and it helped me finally shape my misgivings into words. "I just ... I can make some of my own decisions sometimes, and they don't all turn out to be bad. You're--"

"I never said--!"

"You're over-controlling my life a bit."

Rarity stared at me. "I am?" After a pause, she continued in a less certain voice, "Are you quite sure you're not misinterpreting the situation? I didn't think I was 'controlling' your life at all."

"But, um, you kind of are," Fluttershy said.

Rarity's pupils shrank. "I ... what? Really, Fluttershy, I hardly think a debate over a single cupcake is--"

"It's not about the cupcake," I declared. "It's ... everything. I feel like you've scheduled every bit of my life lately."

"I ... I was only trying to give you guidance."

I stepped closer to her and lowered my voice. "Yes, I know, and I wanted that at first but ... it's kinda going too far. I feel like I'm not getting any say. Yeah, I admit, I don't know what I want half the time, but maybe I'd figure it out if I had the chance."

Rarity remained silent for a long moment before she said in a soft voice, "Candy, I had no idea you felt this way."

"To be honest, I didn't realize it myself until today." I sighed. "And I'm not all that great at standing up for myself."

"Rarity, I don't know if this will help," said Fluttershy. "But you're treating Candy like you tried to do with Sweetie Belle when she first started living with you."

Rarity frowned. "Yes, and I sometimes think I should have pushed a bit harder against her resistance. Maybe then she would be less apt to run off and do insane things with the Crusaders!"

So that was behind this all along? Rarity always had a bit of a heavy hoof with me since I moved into the boutique, but it had become more so after the White Tail Woods.

Rarity sighed and lowered her head. "Oh, dear. I've made a terrible mistake, haven't I?"

I had no idea what else to say. She had just confirmed she had been projecting her frustrations with Sweetie Belle on me. Of course it upset me, and I did resent it, but I could sympathize as well.

I caught sight of the Crusaders waving to me again from their table. I placed a hoof on Rarity's shoulder. "Can we talk about this more later?"

Rarity lifted her head. "Yes, indeed, we will. Please accept my profound apologies, Candy. I should've at least discussed these things with you instead of merely imposing them on you. I'm apparently far more new to this than I had realized."

To be honest, I still needed her guidance. I still had much to learn. But I had spent so many years letting events carry me along -- and I had repeated that same mistake upon first arriving in Equestria -- that I needed to start taking control of my life. Yeah, sometimes letting go was the right thing to do, but not always.

I smiled faintly and gave her a quick hug. "So am I. We'll figure it out together."

Rarity smiled. "Please, go see your friends if you wish. I think I need to speak with Fluttershy a bit more ..."

"Hey, girls." I said as I trotted over to the Crusaders' table. "Sorry I haven't come over to see you before now."

"No problem, Candy," Apple Bloom said as I sat down. "But now that yer here, we can call this meetin' of the Cutie Mark Crusaders ta order!"

"Er ... meeting?"

"Yup! Since we can't meet in our clubhouse til our groundin' is over, I figgered we could use the party ta get together."

I was sure that was not the intent their parents and siblings had in mind in letting them come to the party. "Just so long as you don't have us going after changelings again."

Apple Bloom waved a hoof. "Nah, we learned our lesson this time."

I had my doubts, but I kept them to myself.

"Instead, I'm lookin' to the rodeo comin' up in about a week."

I tilted my head. "Rodeo?"

"Yeah, lots of towns in this here part of Equestria hold a rodeo in the summer, an' Applejack is lettin' me come along. An' I'm invitin' all the Crusaders ta come along with me."

Sweetie Belle looked as dubious as I felt. "But I heard they canceled the rodeo in Ponyville."

Scootaloo gasped. "They did?! When did that happen?"

"No need ta worry, Crusaders!" Apple Bloom said with a smile. "Yeah, I dunno why they canceled it, but this works out great. We get ta go to Appleloosa instead!"

"Oh, cool!" Scootaloo said, fluttering her wings.

"I think Rarity will let us go," Sweetie Belle said.

"Us?" I said.

She smiled. "Sure! You're a Crusader, too, so you're invited."

"We're gonna compete in the events ta earn our cutie marks," Apple Bloom said.

I eyed her. "And Applejack is okay with this?"

"Ah, well, I kinda haven't asked her yet."

"Uh-huh."

Apple Bloom spread her hooves. "But it don't make no sense for her to say no! We'll worry 'bout that when we get there. Minor detail. Anyway, there's sure ta be somethin' there you can do, Candy!"

I stared. "Wait, what? You want me to participate in this rodeo?"

"Sure! Why not?"

A city-bred girl like me participating in a rodeo was so many levels of nope that I didn't know where to start. Seriously, did these kids even stop to consider what they might actually like doing rather than just flinging stuff against the wall to see what stuck?

Recalling the debacle in the White Tail Woods answered my own question.

If they didn't have Applejack going with them, I would consider going if for no other reason than to keep an eye on them and actually prevent them from doing something stupid this time, but a rodeo was about a thousand light years away from any concept of "fun" I could conceive of in either world.

I would have responded to Apple Bloom had I not happened to catch a glint of golden light in the distance. I saw Twilight standing in a far corner of a store talking to an odd-looking pony. Her lack of horn or wings suggested an earth mare, but her strange black-and-white striped fur and hair suggested a zebra. Several gold rings encircled her neck, and similar jewelry hung from her ears and adorned one of her fore-legs just above her hoof.

"Um, maybe Candy doesn't want to go," Sweetie Belle said in a tentative voice.

Hearing my name pulled my attention back to the Crusaders.

"Are ya kiddin' me?" Apple Bloom said.

"Yeah, who wouldn't want to go to something like this?" Scootaloo said.

I raised a hoof. "Well, me, actually." When all but Sweetie Belle met my response with open-mouthed stares, I uttered a sigh. "Look, girls, maybe I don't know quite what I want to do yet, but I do have an idea of what I like, and a rodeo just isn't one of them."

The Crusaders exchanged looks. I took the opportunity to glance at Twilight and that strange zebra-pony. Twilight had a surprised look on her face. The zebra was speaking, but I couldn't hear her from that distance. She pointed a hoof at the pendant, and Twilight's expression went from surprise to shock.

"Well," Apple Bloom said. "If yer sure ..."

"I'm pretty sure, yes," I said. "Girls, you ever think maybe you should stop and consider what you actually like to do, and then work from there?"

They exchanged another round of looks.

"Maybe she has a point," said Sweetie Belle.

"But we always do what we like to do," said Scootaloo.

"An' we never get no marks for 'em!" said Apple Bloom.

Was I the last pony who should be offering this sort of advice? I couldn't discern between what I really wanted and what was expected of me. I had no guarantee that resolving this issue with Rarity would grant me any further insight.

I envied the Crusaders in a way, despite their penchant for leaving common sense by the wayside. They felt a very palpable enthusiasm about their future and a tireless drive to pursue it with little worry as to what other ponies thought. Perhaps I had hoped that would rub off on me somehow, but without their extreme take on it.

"Eh, never mind," I said with a sigh as I glanced towards Twilight again. She had placed a hoof over the pendant as she listened intently to the zebra, her eyes shimmering.

"You okay, Candy?" Sweetie asked.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said without taking my eyes from the distant conversation. "I just got a bit distracted."

Sweetie leaned over and looked for herself. "Wait, what's Zecora doing here?"

"Zecora??" Apple Bloom said. "Where?"

Sweetie pointed, and the other Crusaders looked as well.

"Wow, she almost never comes to these parties," Scootaloo said.

Apple Bloom nodded. "Yeah. Pinkie always invites her, but she don't show most of the time."

"Who is she?" I asked.

"She's a zebra sorceress," said Sweetie Belle. "She lives in the Everfree Forest."

I gave her a dubious look. I had read a little about that as well. "Isn't that a little dangerous?"

"Not for her. She likes it there."

"An' ponies visit her enough that the path to her place ain't even that dangerous either," said Apple Bloom. "I go there myself sometimes ta learn more 'bout potion-makin'."

The two finally parted. Zecora turned and trotted away, heading towards the door. Did Twilight look disturbed, or was that just me projecting my own worries? She glanced in my direction, a hoof still covering the pendant. She appeared surprised to see me looking at her. She lowered her hoof and turned away.

"Wonder what that was all about," Sweetie Belle said.

I had the uneasy feeling I was going to find out for myself soon.

Jump to top

Chapter 26 - A Trip To The Everfree

"I'm going to miss you down in Appleloosa, Candy," said Sweetie Belle as she levitated another item into her saddlebags. "Even though I totally understand why you don't want to go."

I smiled as I watched from the threshold of her room. Earlier, I had explained in more detail how going to a rodeo just wasn't in the wish-list of a city-bred girl like me. "Thanks. I hope you have fun."

"So how much like Manehattan was this city you lived in? Or do you know?"

"I was curious, so I looked it up in a geography book Twilight gave me. A lot looks the same. It even has a statue in the harbor like the city in my world does."

"Cool!" Sweetie Belle closed her saddlebags with a final glow from her horn and trotted towards me. "Do you want to go there someday?"

She really knew how to get to the heart of the matter. "I'm not sure."

She gave me a surprised look. "Really?"

I flicked my tail. "It's kinda hard to explain, Sweetie. I'd like to see it, but I don't know if it'll make me homesick or not."

"Oh, I hadn't thought of that," Sweetie Belle said in a softer voice.

I had only scratched the surface of my feelings. Would I find that it matched New York almost exactly except for, well, ponies? Or would it feel just as foreign as Ponyville sometimes did?

"You should talk to Rarity about it," Sweetie said. "She always says she wants to visit Manehattan again."

I tilted my head. "Again?"

"She went there last year for a fashion competition. She even made a new friend there. I think her her name was Coco."

More often than not, when the conversation turned to venues outside Ponyville, Rarity seemed interested in Canterlot above all else. She pined to open another boutique there, but real estate was apparently both scarce and hideously expensive, at least to hear Rarity complain about it.

"I'll think about it, Sweetie, thanks," I said with a small smile. "You better get going. I thought I heard Applejack's voice on my way up here."

Sweetie Belle trotted out of her room and down the hall. "I'll try to bring you back a souvenir."

"Just promise you won't go after any more changelings," I said as I trotted alongside her.

She rolled her eyes. "I promised that already."

"Or do anything else dangerous."

"Ugh, you're getting as bad as Rarity!"

I smirked. "I am technically your older sister, too."

"Yeah, but I didn't think you'd be as bossy as her."

Sweetie Belle suddenly drew up short when Rarity appeared in our path. "Candy is as bossy as who now?" Rarity asked.

Sweetie's pupils shrank. "Um ... uh ..."

I grinned. "She was talking about somepony at school."

"Yes, I was!" Sweetie piped. "Some big meanie at school. Totally not you."

"Mmm," Rarity murmured. "Considering school is out for the summer, do you want to try that again?"

"Um, well ..."

"That's our story, and we're sticking to it," I said firmly.

Sweetie nodded. "Yep, same here!"

Rarity uttered a dramatic sigh, but her expression softened, and she gave me a tiny smirk. "Very well. Applejack is here to take you to the train station, Sweetie."

I leaned over as Rarity turned away and whispered to Sweetie Belle, "You owe me one."

"Okay, okay, two souvenirs, then," she whispered back.

I giggled. I would have preferred a Pinkie Promise to stay out of trouble, but I doubted I could have maneuvered her into that. At least it would be Applejack's problem this time and not mine.

I knew Sweetie Belle enough by now to realize she was mostly kidding about me being bossy. Though I had been asserting myself a bit more the past week, not the least of which was fending off another attempt by the Crusaders to help me earn my cutie mark. While extracting sap from trees was nowhere near as dangerous as chasing changelings, I saw it ending only in hours spent trying to clean sap from my mane and fur.

Applejack stood waiting at the front of the boutique. I hesitated when I saw Twilight standing next to her, the first time I had seen her since the party.

"Howdy, Candy," said Applejack.

"Hello, Candy," said Twilight, her voice more subdued.

"Um, hi," I said, glancing from one to the other.

Sweetie Belle trotted forward. "I'm ready to go, Applejack! Sorry for the wait."

"No worries," said Applejack. "But we better get goin' ta the station if we wanna snag some decent seats on the train. Apple Bloom's jus' outside, but we still gotta swing by Scootaloo's place."

Sweetie gave first Rarity and then me a hug. "I'll miss you, Candy, even if you are getting bossy."

I chuckled and hugged her back. "See you in a week."

As Sweetie trailed Applejack out the door, Rarity turned to me. "It seems you may have a chance for a little trip of your own."

My heart skipped a beat. "What kind of trip?"

"Do you remember when I said at the party that I had to seek outside help concerning the pendant?" Twilight began.

"Um, yeah."

"I enlisted the aid of a friend named Zecora. She's a--"

"A zebra sorceress," I said.

Twilight smiled. "Why, yes. You've heard of her?"

"The Crusaders told me about her," I said. "I saw you talking to her at that party."

"Twilight tells me Zecora discovered something but needs to speak with you personally," said Rarity.

My eyes widened. "But doesn't she live in the Everfree Forest?"

Rarity smiled. "I trust Twilight implicitly to get you through safely. That is, if you wish to go. Neither of us have any intention of forcing you."

As much as I valued the measure of independence I had gained, I felt it would never be a case of wanting to do this, but more that I felt obligated by Michelle's memory.

"Candy, Zecora may have an explanation for the effect the pendant has had on you," said Twilight.

Despite knowing what my decision had to be, I gave into the impulse to protest anyway. "But it hasn't, not lately. I've seen no more visions of Cherry and had no more dreams about her."

"That's because the pendant has no more energy to use to contact you from a distance," said Twilight. "But ... as Rarity said, nopony will force you to do this."

I believed her, but that didn't stop me from thinking that some intangible force had already begun pushing me forward. I took a step towards Twilight, then glanced at Rarity. "Um ... would you ...?"

"Do you wish me to accompany you?" asked Rarity.

"Yes, but I thought you had an order you needed to finish this morning."

"This is far more important."

My need for support overcame guilt. "Thank you." I turned to Twilight. "All right, I'll come along."

Whether the foreboding look of the Everfree as compared to the White Tail Woods was a real perception or just nerves mattered little when an eerie darkness settled over us despite the cloudless skies. The air even carried a tang of moisture, and drops of water clung to the twisted vines and huge, shadowy trees which loomed over the path. Unlike the Woods, the Everfree was anything but silent. Leaves rustled despite the deathly still air, and faint howls and roars sounded in the distance.

I sincerely hoped they remained in the distance.

Rarity drew closer to me. "Are you okay, dear?"

"M-more or less," I said in a quavering voice. "Are we there yet?"

"Almost," said Twilight.

"Take care not to step in those flowers up ahead, Candy," said Rarity.

Just ahead, flowers with bright blue petals congregated along the far edge of the path as it curved. They looked rather pretty, a much needed dash of color for this dreary place. "Are they poisonous?"

"Not fatally, but very annoying," said Twilight.

Rarity shivered. "Trust me, you don't want to find out what those things do."

It figured that even the most innocuous-looking thing in this place was dangerous. I kept to the opposite side of the path from them; I didn't need the Equestrian equivalent of poison ivy.

"Here we are," said Twilight as we cleared the flowers.

I stepped alongside her and nearly recoiled. So did Zecora decide one day to pick the scariest-looking tree in the forest to make into her home? This started to feel more like an adventure imagined by the Crusaders.

Twilight nudged open the door with her magic, and we stepped inside.

An enclosed space of thick tree bark and wood should have offered solace from the brooding Everfree. Instead, the flickering flames from several small lamps did little to dispel the gloom, though perhaps some of my reaction was just my emotional state. At least this place enforced a sort of quiet, save for the soft bubbling of a cauldron and the clop of the zebra's hooves as she turned towards us upon our entry.

"Hello, Zecora," Twilight said. "This is Candy Swirl, the one I told you about."

"Um, hi," I said in an uncertain voice.

Zecora stepped towards me, smiling. "Since Twilight explained to me about the one called Candy Swirl," she began, speaking in a much deeper voice than I had expected. "I've wanted to meet she whose life has been sent into such a twirl."

"I ... um ... okay?" I glanced at Twilight and Rarity.

"I've already explained your background to her," said Twilight. "And what happened to your friend."

"Of most interest to me is your origin," said Zecora as she swept a hoof towards Twilight. "For it is the key to the pendant and what dwells within."

"What dwells ...?" I sputtered, my mind grinding through both her odd speech pattern and the greater implication of her words.

"Remember when I told you I sensed another presence inside the pendant?" said Twilight.

I glanced at her. "Um, right, yeah."

"Well ... Zecora was able to make more sense out of my findings."

My brain finally lurched back into gear. "It's another avatar, right? Something Starswirl made up somehow?"

Twilight looked to Zecora. "Can you explain it to her, please?"

Zecora nodded and took another step towards me. When she spoke again, her voice was softer and her tone measured. "You believe the memory of your friend is represented by this pendant. But I assure you, what is contained within is more than a mere remnant."

...

... was she ...?

Rarity leaned over and whispered in my ear, "Yes, she speaks in rhyme."

I took a deep breath. I could deal with only so many bizarre things at a time. Okay, fine, she rhymed her speech. I had to chalk it up to more Equestrian weirdness and move on. "A-all right, what does that even mean?"

Zecora trotted over to Twilight and cradled the pendant in her hoof. "Twilight found the entity but asked me to confirm the source. There is every possibility it is your friend's life force."

I almost didn't hear Rarity's gasp as my stomach flipped. The world threatened to become a gray miasma before I forced myself to take a breath, by which time Rarity had wrapped a foreleg around me. When I let my breath go, along with it came the words not so much spoken as begged, "My f-friend is dead."

"If you speak of her body, then the answer is most definitely yes," said Zecora. "But of her spirit, it continues on in the pendant is my guess."

"Oh, dear Celestia," Rarity breathed.

"Your guess?!" I cried. "You don't even know?!"

Twilight stepped forward. "Candy, please, calm down, she's--"

"Don't you dare tell me to calm down!" I bellowed, and Rarity flinched. I thrust a hoof at Zecora. "She just told me that Cherry m-might be alive and I carried her around my neck all that time without even knowing!"

"I know this is a shock to you," Twilight said.

"No, Twilight, you can't even come close to understanding how I feel!"

"All right, maybe I don't, but we still need to confirm--"

I stomped my fore-hooves and broke from Rarity's half-embrace. "I almost gave the pendant away to Chrysalis! I almost k-killed her a second time ... I a-almost ..."

I started to collapse. Rarity caught me and pulled me close. I struggled to free myself, but this short conversation had completely drained my strength in equal measure to how it had turned my life upside down again. I leaned into Rarity, but I resisted the urge to burst into tears. I couldn't let myself descend into another emotional morass.

"Candy, this is not your fault," Rarity said gently. "You had no idea. None of us did. Not even Twilight."

"I am so very sorry, dear Candy Swirl, to cause you such grief," came Zecora's heavy voice. "But heed Rarity's words, and do not let self-blame become your belief."

That wasn't it.

I didn't really blame myself anymore for Michelle's death, but the convenience of such an easily understood concept bred greater acceptance in my mind than the alternative. It had worked for me in the past, so why not now? Instead, a stark realization drove the tears that leaked from my eyes no matter how hard I fought against them.

Somehow, I already knew. Ever since the dreams started, I knew. She had forged such a powerful presence in my mind and in the forest that there could be no other explanation. Yet what did this really mean? What was I supposed to do? What was I supposed to feel?

A greater wisdom simply didn't exist. Even this vaunted rhyming sorceress could offer only possibilities. I could simply cry into Rarity's fur, and it would get me nowhere. Sometimes crying was a good, needed release. But sometimes, like now, it just separated me from what I needed to do.

I was a teenager. I wasn't mature by any stretch of the imagination across two universes. I knew I still had yet to find a balance between blazing my own trail and taking the advice of others. But now, I could draw on others only for strength and comfort; I could admit my weakness that far without shame, but they had no connection to Michelle like I had. Like I did.

I forced myself to take a few deep breaths, each a little less shaky than the last. I sniffled and blinked away tears as I slowly drew back from Rarity's embrace. Her concerned eyes sought mine, her lips parting to ask the question that I chose to answer before she could speak. "I-I'm okay now."

Rarity hesitated, her eyes uncertain. I could guess that she was debating how much of a protective mother to be. Like I had implied at the party and said more directly in the talk we had afterward, I could only be protected so much. She understood and nodded once.

I turned to the others, wiping my eyes with the back of a hoof. "I'm sorry for all the drama."

"It's all right, Candy," Twilight said, her own eyes glistening. "There was no easy way to break this."

I turned to Zecora. Despite her sympathetic gaze, I quelled a surge of hostility, as it was just a childish attempt to place blame. I paused until my ears stopped trying to flatten against my head. "Zecora, you said you weren't sure about this. Is that what you needed me for?"

"A spirit different from other ponies resides within you," Zecora replied. "From this I can determine if my theory is true."

"Twilight said the other day that I looked like an ordinary unicorn pony."

"And you still do," Twilight said. "The differences Zecora speaks of are more subtle and at a level that my magic doesn't reach."

Rarity brushed her hoof through my mane. "Candy, this doesn't change at all who you are, or how I feel about you, or how your friends feel."

"I-I know," I said with a small sigh. "I'm not really concerned about that right now. This is just a lot to take in, and ... well, no offense, Twilight, but I kinda thought you knew everything about magic."

Twilight smiled. "Even as an alicorn, there are things I don't know. Zecora's magic works on an entirely different basis than my own. She's been a very big help to me in the past."

"To all of us," said Rarity. "Candy, if you're worried as to whether you can trust her or not ..."

I shook my head quickly. "No, it's not that. If you and Twilight trust her, so do I."

Zecora smiled. "It warms my heart to hear this praise of me." She took a step back, standing alongside her cauldron. "Now, Candy Swirl, will you step forward so we may see?"

I swallowed hard, and my heart pounded. Rarity gave me a brief hug and whispered, "Go ahead, Candy, I'll be right here if you need me."

I took a step forward. "What do I need to do? Will this hurt?"

"I assure you, there will be no pain," said Zecora. "But before we start, something you have lost you must now gain."

"I don't understand."

Twilight stepped over to me. "She means you'll need this." Her magic suffused her horn and the pendant. She detached the pendant from her neck and held it before me. "You have to accept this back. I'm sorry, Candy, I know how hard this will be, but it's the only way Zecora's spell will work."

My eyes shimmered as I stared. Despite the fact that my magic would never damage the thing even if I practiced for the next hundred years, I still didn't trust my ability that far. I sat down and took it in my shaking hooves instead. After a few tries, I lifted it towards my neck. I uttered a startled gasp when the ends of the chain suddenly snaked around my neck and came together under my mane. For a moment my heart thundered as if I expected it to start choking me. When nothing of the sort happened, I rose on my trembling legs.

"A-all right," I said. "Now what?"

Zecora trotted around to the other side of the cauldron. "You now have the lightest load to bear," she said as she turned towards a shelf. "You need only to stand there."

She tilted her head and grabbed something from the shelf in her teeth. She turned around, holding a large vial of bright purple fluid, which she poured into the cauldron.

With a sudden whoosh, vapors boiled out of the mix, roiling towards the ceiling in snaking clouds of purple-red smoke. I flinched and nearly fell back on my haunches. My ears flattened as the vapors suddenly imploded at a spot a few hoof-widths above the surface of the brew, and the air shimmered.

Zecora peered at me through the miasma and nodded. "This mist lifts away the veils covering your spirit, and now allows us to very clearly see it."

Twilight trotted to where Zecora stood and uttered a soft gasp. "Is that what Candy looked like in her original form?"

My heart froze. They were seeing me as a human through that?

"Spirit truly has no actual shape or form," said Zecora. "But instead resonates with what it still believes is the norm."

I had avoided discussing my original form with them, for what reasons I couldn't explain. Likely stupid ones, knowing me. This made me feel more naked than the casual nudity among ponykind ever had. Or was I simply reacting as a typical teenager, afraid of what others would think of me? Perhaps Twilight read this on my face, for she smiled as she said in a gentle voice, "Well, it's little wonder now why you had some difficulties with coordination when you first arrived. I didn't realize you used to be bipedal."

My heart sank when a curious Rarity trotted forward, but she paused and turned to me. "Would you mind if I looked? I won't if it bothers you at all."

It did bother me, but I refused to go back to the days when I was afraid of everything they might find out about me, and it meant the world to me that she cared enough to ask permission. "Go ahead."

Rarity nodded and joined Twilight, and her gaze took on a look of what I hoped was no more than simple fascination. "My stars," she said in a soft voice.

"It's okay, Candy," Twilight said. "Please, don't worry. This is not as strange as you may think."

"Yes, of course," said Rarity with a soft smile. "Spike walks on two feet, for example."

"I was also thinking about the Diamond Dogs. Very different body shape, of course, but still the same general anatomical principle concerning--"

Rarity rolled her eyes. "Oh, really, Twilight, you could've used a better analogy than that! Candy's old form is far more pleasing to the eye than a scruffy old Diamond Dog."

Twilight's pupils shrank. "W-wait, I didn't mean--!"

Both Rarity and Zecora laughed, and Twilight blushed, though her lips twitched into a smile.

As much as my heart melted over Rarity's comment about my human appearance in Zecora's magical mist, it again raised the old question: was I still just a human wrapped in a pony body? I no longer knew what answer I wanted. I didn't hate this body anymore. While having hands and fingers had its advantages, so did a unicorn horn. Was it even that, or did I just like having a family and friends, and being a pony seemed integral to that?

I didn't dare ask the question. I had to believe what Rarity had said, that my form ultimately didn't matter. Princess Luna already knew what I used to look like, yet even her opinion no longer mattered as much to me as the pony who now looked upon my old visage with simple, gentle affection.

"So what do we do next?" Twilight asked. "How do we confirm your theory, Zecora?"

"To complete the spell, you need to do one thing more," said Zecora. "Infuse your magic into the pendant as you did the day before."

Twilight trotted around the side of the cauldron. "But wouldn't that amount of energy while she's still wearing it be a bit dangerous?"

"For this we need no more than a spark. Just enough for the spirit to make its mark."

Twilight stepped towards me. "Just stand still, Candy," she said in a soft voice. "You might feel a tingling, but that's all. Are you ready?"

I simply nodded once, not trusting my voice.

Twilight gave me an encouraging smile and lowered her head. I took a shuddering breath as her horn glowed, and let it go as a gasp as the pendant itself suddenly blazed and flooded the cramped space with golden light.

Rarity stared in wonder at something I could not see. "I-is that ...?"

Zecora nodded once. "That is the one this pony had befriended," she said in a subdued voice. "It is clear now that her journey has not yet ended."

I refused to let my waning strength dump me on my haunches while Twilight's spell still surged through the pendant, yet I could not stop my vision from blurring into a watery mess. "Sh-she's ... she's alive??"

Rarity turned to Zecora. "My stars, is that true? Is her friend still alive somehow?"

Zecora did not respond at first, and my throat became too tight to demand she answer. She turned towards her shelves and retrieved another vial, this one filled with white. She poured it into the cauldron, and the brew frothed and rumbled. The shimmering veil vanished. Twilight ceased her spell and lifted her head, the glow from my pendant fading.

"The spirit contained within the pendant is as strong as Candy's own," said Zecora. "To the extent that this conveys life is not as clearly known."

Rarity trotted to my side and wrapped a foreleg around me. I sniffled once but managed not to cry. I gently placed a hoof over the pendant. What had been such a source of contention was now almost as precious as my own life. "So what happens now?"

"That's entirely up to you, Candy," said Twilight.

I jerked my head towards her. "Huh?"

"Zecora told me that if she did confirm that Cherry's spirit is contained within the pendant, she could arrange for you to ... to talk to your friend."

My heart lurched, and yet I felt no surprise. Perhaps I was simply numb to any further shock ... or perhaps I already sensed the greater truth.

Zecora stepped around the cauldron. "It will take me a few days to brew the proper potion, but only if you desire to proceed with this notion."

I trembled hard. This time I couldn't stop the tears. I at least managed to not to descend into histrionics; the tears just slid silently down my face and splashed to the floor. Rarity held me, and I closed my eyes tightly. "How did he do it?"

"I'm sorry?" Rarity said.

"S-starswirl ... how did he do it? Why did he do it?!"

"I honestly don't know, Candy," Twilight said. "There's no record he ever accomplished such a feat. But I'm going to find out."

I wished I felt the same determination that I heard in Twilight's voice. Instead, I was looking for someone or something to blame. Again.

No more. I had to make this decision. That was the greater truth I had sensed, that only I could answer my own question this time. Only I knew Michelle well enough to tell if she were truly still alive or just a memory given little more than a cruel semblance of life by the mental shadow of a unicorn wizard who died millennia ago.

"All right, Zecora," I said in a shaky voice. "I'll do it."

Author's Note

For those who don't read my blog, the next update will be delayed a day due to my work schedule. The next chapter will be posted on 4/30 (instead of 4/29).

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Chapter 28 - A Conversation With Newer Friends

Rarity wanted to finish an order before the meeting, but thought it best I head directly to the castle. Fluttershy was the first to arrive, and as we sat in the dining hall, I burned with the need to tell her what had happened. I refrained at first, as I didn't want to tell the same tale twice, yet when she hugged me, it reminded me so much of those poignant moments I had just spent with Michelle that it nearly brought me to tears.

"Are you okay, Candy?" Fluttershy asked.

For once, I welcomed the question. I smiled and blinked until my vision cleared. "Yeah, I'm okay. I don't want to go into too much detail before the others arrive, but I did get to talk to Cherry."

Fluttershy uttered a small gasp, and her eyes shimmered. "Is ... i-is she a ghost?"

My knowledge of Equestrian culture was better but still not good enough to know how ponies felt about the spirits of the dead. Fluttershy's question was likely motivated more by her timidness than anything else. "She's much more real than that. I want to think of her as alive, even if she doesn't have a body."

"I just can't imagine living like that. If she could move around on her own, maybe that would be better." After a pause, she added in a tiny voice, "If a little scary."

I smiled and gave her a hug. "I don't think you'd find anything scary about her."

She slowly smiled. "I know I'm being silly."

"It's okay, really. I had no idea what to expect when Zecora proposed this."

"Is Zecora coming to the meeting?"

"No, she stayed behind to do more work on the potion," I said. "She wants to simplify it. Right now it takes several days to make, and she has to devote almost her whole time to it. Some of the ingredients are kinda rare, too."

I tried not to sound despondent. Hadn't Michelle sounded fairly confident that we would talk again soon? I wanted to ask Twilight if she had her own ideas beyond Zecora's complex potion, but she became rather withdrawn after we left the Everfree Forest, and she had retreated to her library almost as soon as we had arrived at the castle.

Fluttershy gave me a sympathetic smile. "I'm sure it will work out. I really do hope you get to talk to Cherry again."

I hesitated before giving her a weak smile.

She tilted her head. "Something wrong?"

Wow, that really was uncanny, no matter how many times it happened. Despite having learned to be more open, I sometimes needed a little prodding. At least now I didn't mind so much. "Fluttershy, are you ... are you upset at all that I haven't been by as often as I used to?"

Fluttershy appeared surprised. "Upset? No, why?"

"You don't feel like I've been ignoring you? I mean, I've been ... busy at the boutique lately." That had not been my first thought; the first words that had come to mind were "bonding with Rarity."

Fluttershy smiled. "Rarity thinks the world of you, Candy, and she's your fosterer. It only makes sense that you spend most of your time with her."

"But if I start talking to Cherry more often, then that takes away more time from us."

"Well, I'll miss not seeing you quite as much, but I understand."

"I just don't want you to think I'm replacing you with her."

Fluttershy uttered a soft gasp. "Oh, my, why would I think that?"

I had no answer. It all lay tangled with my own emotional struggle concerning the memory of my mother and how it fit into my relationship with Rarity. Michelle had given me a lot to think about; I understood in my head what I needed to do, but my heart still lagged behind.

Fluttershy smiled gently. "Friends don't replace each other, Candy. When you made friends with me, did I replace Cherry in your heart?"

I smiled faintly. "Of course not, but she was just a memory back then."

"It doesn't matter. Just because we don't do as much together doesn't mean we stop being friends." She looked thoughtful. "Think of my friendship with Rainbow Dash. There are very few activities that we both like to do, and our interests are really different, but we're still very good friends."

I did wonder how the six managed to remain such close friends with their wildly divergent personalities and interests. I supposed rescuing Equestria from danger several times over had a tendency to forge lasting friendships, but still.

I realized then how insular I had been as a child. I had many acquaintances but few friends. I supposed I had believed that having a loving mother and a good friend like Michelle were all I needed.

"So, no, Candy, I'm not worried that Cherry will replace me," said Fluttershy. "So long as you don't believe that."

I certainly didn't want it to happen. I treasured my friendship with Fluttershy. I considered all the six my friends, even Rainbow Dash and Applejack whom I rarely saw and generally didn't seek out day-to-day. Whether intentional or not, I had been using Fluttershy as a surrogate for Michelle, and I feared I'd throw her away now that I had Michelle back.

But did I really have her back? She couldn't appear to me whenever she wanted. I couldn't see, hear, or feel her anytime I wanted. But Fluttershy I could. Same with Rarity. She existed in the here and now, a tangible presence I could see, hear, and touch. As much as I loved my birth mother, she wasn't there, not even as a spirit. Why should I cling to someone who was no more than a memory? I had to learn how to remember her without letting it stop me from moving on.

I tried to take to heart what Michelle had said: I deserved some joy in my life.

"I'm working on it," I said softly. "I really am."

Fluttershy hugged me, dispelling most of my foolish notions and easing my fears. The timing was good; Twilight entered the room with Spike beside her. "Candy? The others have arrived. We're ready to start."

Fluttershy gave me a reassuring squeeze. "It'll be okay, Candy."

I nodded and smiled. Despite the tumult in my heart, I could start believing that.

As Applejack was still in Appleloosa, I had the privilege of sitting with the rest in their council room. The chair indeed felt more like a throne, dwarfing me and reminding me how I felt out of my league despite being among friends.

The cutie map which had been such a ubiquitous and even curious presence during my earlier stay now imposed a more serious atmosphere to my already dark tale concerning the changelings, as if everything said in this room somehow affected the fate of Equestria. Only the roots dangling from the ceiling and the beautiful crystal ornaments attached to them helped warm the mood a bit, but made me feel no less anxious.

I managed not to tear up when I spoke of Michelle. The chairs separated us enough that neither Rarity nor Fluttershy could easily comfort me. I tried to take Michelle's advice to heart and act in the more mature manner she had so lauded. An unnerving silence followed the conclusion of my tale as the other ponies looked towards Twilight.

Twilight brooded for a few moments before she finally said, "This changes everything."

"I'll say it does," said Rainbow Dash.

"I feel in a way like I have to start over and re-examine everything I thought I knew."

"I wouldn't quite go that far," said Rarity. "I can see several ways to proceed from here."

"Um, Rarity?" Spike began. "I don't think that's quite what she--"

Twilight stared at Rarity. "How can you say that?!"

Rarity looked nonplussed. "Well, it's obvious what we need to do. Ah ... isn't it?"

"It's not obvious in the least. I have no idea what to think of Starswirl or his intentions anymore!"

Spike sighed. "Yeah, that's what I thought."

"Wait, what?!" Rainbow cried. "All this time you've been talking about Starswirl the Bearded?"

"What else would I be talking about, Rainbow?"

Rainbow face-hoofed. "Um, hello! Deadly changeling still on the loose? Protecting Candy from her? Protecting her spirit-friend? You know, stuff that's actually important?"

"I'm not ignoring that," Twilight said in a softer voice. "I know it's very important. But please, let me finish my thought. I promise we'll come back to it."

Rainbow sighed. "Fine."

I sided with Rainbow Dash, as the prospect of a changeling going after me threatened to throw me back into the fear and paranoia that had so consumed my life during the summit. I wanted no part of that emotional turmoil again. Perhaps I had matured, but it didn't need to be put constantly to the test. My life didn't have to descend into a persistent trial by fire.

Twilight met the eyes of the other ponies as she spoke. "Everypony, please understand, for a very long time, Starswirl the Bearded has been something of a hero to me. Perhaps Princess Celestia was right when she said that he didn't understand friendship quite as I do, but he never did anything to intentionally harm anypony."

"Um, did he really harm anypony in making the pendant?" Fluttershy asked. "I mean, did he ever use it on anypony other than Cherry?"

"Since it appears that a spirit can't leave once it enters the pendant, likely not," said Twilight. "But what was his intention? Why create something to effectively imprison a living spirit?"

I shuddered. I had not wanted to think in those terms, though I had seen the implication myself. Michelle believed Starswirl to have been motivated by guilt; perhaps not as good as compassion, but better than any outright sinister intention.

I couldn't pin down my feelings about Starswirl. Maybe it would have been better if I had met him, even if it were only an avatar. Despite knowing what he looked like from portraits and such, he remained a faceless enigma.

"What about that stuff Candy said about Discord looking for it?" Spike said. "Maybe Starswirl wanted to trap him."

"Even with as complex a thaumic matrix as Starswirl created, it would never have contained that much chaotic energy, and Starswirl would've known that," said Twilight.

"But then why was Discord looking for it?" Rainbow said. "Why would he do that if he didn't think it could be used against him?"

My heart thumped when I recalled them telling me how Discord had invited himself to the meeting they had held during my stay at the castle. I glanced about as if expecting the draconequus to suddenly pop out of thin air. I was not in the proper mindset to deal with him.

"Um, I don't think that's it," Fluttershy said.

"Look, Flutters, I know you always defend him, but why else does he keep dodging your questions about it?"

Fluttershy sighed and lowered her gaze. "It just doesn't make sense to me. Why would he be worried about it? Nopony was threatening him, and he's been behaving himself."

Rainbow snorted and rolled her eyes.

"We're getting off the topic," Twilight declared.

"Really, Twi, what else is there to say?" Rainbow said. "Let's talk about something more important. Or better, let's stop all the talking and do something. I'd love a chance to take another whack at that changeling Sev-whats-its-face!"

"Sevfivtoo," said Rarity. "We don't even know where it is. Really, we should let Twilight finish."

"Thank you," said Twilight. "I still believe that knowing Starswirl's intent may be key to understanding the situation."

"Maybe Starswirl simply made a mistake," Fluttershy said.

Twilight's pupils shrank. "A mistake? What do you mean?"

"Well, Cherry told Candy that Starswirl was too embarrassed to talk about it. I know when I make a big mistake, I feel really embarrassed about it, too."

"That would be ... one really huge mistake, Fluttershy."

"I know." Fluttershy sighed. "And I know how highly you regard him, but all ponies make mistakes."

"Maybe she's right, Twilight," Spike said. "Didn't you tell me he had lots of failures early in his career?"

"Yes, Spike, but this pendant was made at the height of his skill," said Twilight. "He must've had some end result in mind, and we just don't know what it is."

"Unless it was like a leftover cake," Pinkie Pie chirped.

"Yes, unless it was like ... er ... what??"

Pinkie smiled. "You know, like that bit of leftover chocolate cake that you really don't want to be tempted by, so you shove it way, way back in the fridge. Then you forget about it for awhile, but eventually you find it again, and it calls to you. Tempting you with its rich chocolatey layers and thick, sweet frosting ... mmm, frosting ... tasty, creamy frosting ..."

"Oh, dear, she's having another frosting episode," Fluttershy said.

"Pinkie, darling, please focus," Rarity said.

Pinkie blinked rapidly and wiped the drool with a back of a hoof. "Anyway, where was I? Oo, frosting, right!"

"Can you please skip past that?" Rainbow said with a sigh.

"Okey-dokey! Anyway, you know you should finish that cake, but you never get around to it, and it just sits there, unfinished, really bothering you but something just keeps stopping you from eating it." Pinkie giggled. "Not that I ever have that problem, but some ponies do."

Silence. The others exchanged glances. Rainbow frowned and said, "That's it?"

"Yeppers!"

"Pinkie, what the hay does that have to do with--?"

"No, wait, she has a point!" Twilight said.

The idea that a Pinkie Pie tangent had led to some revelation no longer surprised me. That I could actually start to unravel her logic, however, scared me a little.

"Maybe this is a situation similar to Starswirl's unfinished spell!" said Twilight.

Another silence settled over the others.

Spike's eyes slid back and forth. "Um, you mean the same spell that you finished which let you become an alicorn?"

My ears rose.

"Yes, exactly!" said Twilight, smiling.

"Ahem," said Rarity. "The same spell that swapped all our cutie marks around?"

I blinked. "She did what now?"

Twilight blushed. "Well, yes, but ..."

Rainbow folded her forelegs over her chest. "I don't like where this is going."

"Join the club," Spike murmured.

Twilight shook her head. "No, wait, it's not like that ..."

Fluttershy's ears drooped. "Um, I think I agree with Rainbow Dash and Spike."

Twilight snapped out her wings and thumped a fore-hoof on the table. "Listen to me! All I mean is that the situation is similar. Starswirl started this project, had some sort of end result in mind, but never finished it because he hit some sort of obstacle. I'm not intending to try to complete his research right now, other than to find a way to help Cherry manifest without the need for Zecora's potion. That alone may help me figure out what he was trying to do."

My ears drew back slightly, and I uttered a short gasp. She had already intended to help Michelle manifest? This should be good news, yet I saw only dubious looks from the others. I wished I understood the situation better. I knew only in very broad terms about how Twilight had gained her title via some feat of magic. I had not known it had involved Starswirl somehow.

Or that it had resulted in a magical accident. I kind of wished I hadn't learned that.

I placed a hoof over my pendant and lowered my gaze to it as I thought back to what Michelle had said, that not even Starswirl could create a new body for her. Yet here was Twilight Sparkle, the Princess of Magic, who had completed a spell that Starswirl couldn't. Why wouldn't she be able to...?

I sighed. No, I had been down that road before when I had doubted her word that she couldn't break the binding magic of the pendant. If she had been able to create a new body for Michelle, wouldn't she have offered already? But what if that had been the intended result of Starswirl's research?

What if Twilight could indeed do what Starswirl couldn't?

"Candy?"

My head jerked up at the sound of Fluttershy's voice. Only then did I realize everypony was looking at me. "I'm sorry?"

"You have the final say in what's done with the pendant," said Twilight.

I almost asked her. The words had formed in my head and nearly tumbled from my lips.

I clamped my mouth shut. No, not yet. If something could be done for Michelle, I refused to screw it up by rushing headlong into danger, especially if this foray into unknown magicks could precipitate another accident. I couldn't take the chance of doing something bad to Michelle that I would indeed be at least partially responsible for.

I lowered my hoof. "I want to help you figure this out but ... I'm not letting anything happen to this pendant that would endanger it or Cherry."

"I have no intention of doing so, Candy," Twilight said softly. "But I meant what I said. I want to help her manifest so you can talk to her more often."

I frowned. "And not just to find out more about Starswirl. I'm actually getting pretty tired of hearing his name. I almost wish I never had."

Thankfully, Rarity didn't call me out on my harsh tone. Twilight's eyes glistened. "I'm sorry if I seemed obsessed over him. He means a lot to me. But I'd never, ever consider him or his memory more important than the spirit of your friend. Or you."

I wanted to believe her, and none of her friends appeared anything less than convinced that Twilight's words rang true. When my eyes met those of Fluttershy, she gave me a small, encouraging smile. I remembered how Rarity had not hesitated to trust Twilight when she led us through the Everfree Forest.

And if Michelle had any chance of coming back for real, and if Twilight could do it ...

"All right," I said. "I'll let you do what you need to. I ... I trust you."

Twilight smiled. "Thank you."

"Now can we talk about the changeling?" Rainbow said.

"Yes, we should," said Twilight. "The first thing we need to do is protect Candy. I think it would be best that she remain in Ponyville for the foreseeable future."

My ears drooped. As much sense as it made, I had hoped that if an opportunity arose where Rarity needed to travel to Manehattan, I could tag along.

"But is that enough?" Rainbow said.

"This changeling Sevfivtoo sounds really dangerous," Fluttershy said.

"I have an idea," Twilight said. "Something similar to the spell that I had crafted to detect changeling mind magicks, but an improved version to fix the loophole Sevfivtoo found and tied to just Candy. I can set it to alert another pony if an attempt is made to affect Candy's mind."

"And who will it alert?" Rarity asked.

"Me, of course. It will also allow me to home in on her and teleport right to her location."

Rarity tapped her fore-hoof against her chin. "What of the Gala coming up? You said Princess Celestia asked you to help with the preparations."

"It's just within the range of my teleportation ability, so I think it'll be fine."

"Okay, great, that protects her head," said Rainbow. "What about her body?"

"Perhaps a shield spell?" Fluttershy suggested.

Twilight looked thoughtful. "Unfortunately, I don't believe Candy's magical ability is up to that level yet."

"No, it's not," I said.

"Move her into the castle again, then?" Spike suggested.

I swished my tail. "No, I don't want it to be like before. I don't want to be cooped up anywhere. No offense, Twilight, I did like living here, but it would feel like a prison to me now."

Spike smiled. "Even if I brought you more daffodils?"

I chuckled weakly. "Even then, Spike, but thank you."

"Just polish her pendant reeeal good!" Pinkie said. "Then it'll be so shiny she can blind anypony who tries to attack her."

Twilight smiled. "I don't think that would work, Pinkie, but you did give me an idea. I could tie a shield spell to her pendant. The casing is made of an alloy that itself can store magical energy, so I can do it without disturbing its inner workings. Candy would just need to visit me every few days so I can renew the spell. It'll be good for only one blow, but again, I can make it alert me so I can teleport to her."

"But will that be enough?" Fluttershy asked.

"Cherry said Sevfivtoo was pretty powerful," I said.

"Which we already knew to some extent," said Twilight.

"Can you make this shield thingie alert more than one pony?" Rainbow Dash said.

"I think so. Why?"

"Because I want a piece of this changeling, that's why!"

Twilight frowned. "This is not about picking a fight."

"But the more ponies who can show up, the better. 'Specially if this thing is supposed to be some super-drone or whatever."

Where I had already seen Rainbow's prowess at fighting a changeling -- including not being afraid to hit one disguised as a friend -- I felt more confident in her combat abilities than Twilight's.

"I believe Rainbow has a point," said Rarity. "And I would also insist on knowing if Candy were in danger, regardless of my lack of combat abilities."

That reassured me even more than the idea of Rainbow Dash leaping to my defense, and I gave Rarity a small smile.

"Let me see what I can do," Twilight said.

"Wasn't there a second changeling?" Fluttershy said. "Her name was, um, Wuntusix, I think."

"Cherry hardly said anything about it other than the name," I said.

"That was likely the smaller drone," said Twilight. "The one who impersonated Bon Bon that day Candy was at the spa with Rarity. She lured Strong Wing into a chase, and the other, stronger changeling Sevfivtoo stunned him and replaced him while he was briefly hidden from view."

"So do we need to worry about it, too?"

Twilight turned to Rainbow. "Are you sure you and the Wonderbolts saw Chrysalis and another changeling enter the portal?"

"Positive!" said Rainbow. "The Wonderbolts even hung out until you got there in case they tried to pull a fast one by coming right back when they thought we weren't looking."

"And I'm sure I had detected that two changelings used that portal circle before I dispelled it. So Wuntusix must have been the one who traveled with Chrysalis back to the badlands and left Sevfivtoo behind." Twilight sighed. "I have to admit, some of this doesn't add up."

"What's to add up?" Rainbow said. "Candy stopped the bug queen from getting the pendant, so she's trying again."

"But Chrysalis usually doesn't operate this way. She doesn't give her drones this much independent authority."

"But didn't she do that when she sent the changelings to Candy's world in the first place?" Spike asked.

"That's different," said Twilight. "She had no choice. She couldn't leave the hive herself for that long."

Rainbow rolled her eyes. "Look, does it matter? That thing is out there, and we gotta hunt it down. Maybe the Crusaders had the right idea even if they were nuts to try it themselves."

Twilight nodded. "I want to find it, too, but it's going to be difficult. A brute force search is out, since it was able to disguise its camp from even my brother." She glanced around. "Unfortunately, I think that's all we can really do at the moment. I need to send a report to Princess Celestia and do some more research."

Rarity sighed. "I hate the feeling that we're being forced on the defensive, Twilight."

"So do I, but the alternative is to act rashly. We have to assume this drone is highly intelligent. We need to out-think it, but we can't do that without having some idea of its game plan."

Rainbow frowned. "Great, an egghead changeling. Just what the world needs."

Twilight hopped off her throne. "Thank you, everypony. And thank you, Candy, for talking to us."

I hopped down from my borrowed throne. "It's fine. I just hope this'll be over soon."

Rarity and Fluttershy stepped over to me, each giving me a hug in turn. I honestly had no idea what "over" meant. The end of the threat from the changeling? Learning what Starswirl intended in creating the pendant? Finding a way to give Michelle a second chance at a real life?

I shuddered. Rarity gave me a questioning look, but I shook my head. I really didn't know how to voice that last thought without sounding macabre. Or worse, being told it can't be done.

"Candy, I need some time to craft those spells," said Twilight. "Can you come by tomorrow morning? I should have it done by then."

"Sure," I said. "Thanks, Twilight."

"Does anypony want to stay for lunch?" Spike asked.

Rainbow flew from her throne. "Nah, I'm just gonna grab a hayburger. I promised AJ I'd give one of her groves some extra rain while she was gone."

"Oo, I'll stay!" Pinkie said as she bounced a few times.

"Okay, she counts for two," Spike murmured. "Or maybe three."

Rarity stepped forward. "I was planning on taking Candy out for lunch. You're welcome to join us, Fluttershy."

Fluttershy smiled. "I'd be happy to."

As we headed out of the castle, I turned to Rarity and asked, "So I've heard several ponies now mention this 'Gala' thing. What is it?"

Rarity smiled. "The Grand Galloping Gala, dear. A yearly banquet and celebration held in Canterlot. An affair that is very prestigious without being overly stuffy."

It sounded much like some of the social events my mother held that I had started attending when I was ten. "So who gets to go to this thing?"

"It's a fairly exclusive event. Princess Celestia herself sends out the invitations. She sent one to each of us, and we can all bring a date or a friend. I like to call it a 'plus one'."

My ears perked up. "Really? You can take anypony?"

She hesitated. "Ah, well, I've already promised Sweetie Belle I would take her."

My ears immediately drooped slightly despite my best efforts. "Oh, okay."

"I really am sorry, dear. You've told me how much you enjoyed that sort of thing when you were her age, but I had already promised her before you arrived."

"And I've already promised to take another friend," said Fluttershy sadly.

"It's okay." I forced a small smile. "Maybe next year."

So was that a stupid thing to be upset over? I had a powerful changeling out to get me, and I was peeved over some silly event I didn't really know anything about until a few moments ago?

Sometimes I hated being a "typical teenager."

Jump to top

Chapter 29 - A Most Trying Day

"--but Rrraarrriiiittttyyy!"

Sweetie Belle's shrill and plaintive cry managed not to break my concentration, and two books still hovered firmly in my magical grasp. I narrowed my eyes as I lifted them so I could see the bookshelf more clearly.

"No 'buts' about this, Sweetie Belle," Rarity declared. "I am simply beside myself over your behavior!"

I uttered a soft sigh. I had hoped to finish my task of reorganizing my bookshelf and set about my morning errands before the shit hit the fan. Not that I cared in what order my books sat on the shelf, but it was another exercise in managing multiple objects.

I heard a hoof-stomp. "You're not listening to me!" Sweetie cried.

"Don't stomp your hoof like that at me," Rarity snapped.

"Why not? You let Candy do it."

I sighed, though I had resolved not to get involved. The Crusaders had brought this on themselves. I stared at the bookshelf and tried to extend my magic to open a space and not drop the two books I still held aloft.

"Never mind what I let Candy do," said Rarity. "She's been acting far more mature than you lately."

"You're not being fair!"

"Sweetie Belle, you broke an outlaw out of jail!"

She did what now? She hadn't told me that part!

"But he wasn't really ... I mean ..." Sweetie trailed off. "Okay, officially, he kinda was, but by then, we--"

"Didn't the incident with chasing changelings teach you anything?" Rarity cried.

"But this wasn't the same! Troubleshoes hadn't really done anything wrong. He just got clumsy when he tried to watch the rodeos. He didn't understand what his cutie mark meant."

The books I pushed to the side to open the space wobbled but did not fall over. I admit that I still had one ear on the conversation. Not actually hard to do with swiveling pony ears.

"Which does nothing to excuse the fact that you and your Crusader friends tried to obtain your cutie marks by finding him when you did believe him to be an outlaw," said Rarity.

I shook my head as I slid a book into the space. Seriously, how did the Crusaders manage not to get themselves killed?

"Oh, um, yeah, that," Sweetie said in a low voice.

"Yes, that!" Rarity declared.

"But I did start having some doubts about it, especially when it started to rain and we, um, kinda got lost."

"In a strange forest! At night! And Applejack had no idea where you or your friends were! At least when you went off on that insane lark in the White Tail Woods, ponies knew where you were. You're extremely lucky Troubleshoes did turn out to be harmless."

I opened a second space on the bookshelf more easily despite cringing slightly. I actually felt a little sorry for Sweetie Belle. I never heard Rarity so angry.

"I'm sorry," Sweetie said in a tiny voice. "But it did turn out okay in the end."

"Your behavior is still inexcusable, and you're still grounded for a month."

Sweetie Belle gasped. "A whole month?!"

I shoved the remaining book onto the shelf, closing up the extra space with one last magical push that left nearly every book leaning slightly. I decided not to trust my now disrupted concentration and nudged it back with a hoof.

"B-but ... but the Gala ... it's next week," Sweetie said in a quavering voice.

"I am seriously reconsidering whether to take you or not."

My eyes widened. Oh, shit.

"WHAT?!"

"Don't yell, Sweetie, I--"

"You can't do that!"

"And don't tell me what I can or can't do."

"But--!"

"Enough! Go to your room!"

I remained standing by the shelf until I heard Sweetie's stomping hooves rise in volume and then fade. I flinched as she closed her door with a bone-jarring slam that knocked the books askew again.

I paused another few moments before venturing out of my room. I heard Rarity's own heavy hoof-falls in the back room. Avoiding her sounded like the best thing for--

"Candy!" Rarity suddenly snapped.

"Um, yes?" I called out.

"You need to go about your errands. Twilight has to cast those spells for you, and the market should have that thread I need."

"Okay, be right down." I levitated my saddlebags onto my barrel before trotting out of my room. I knew I should stay out of it, but I stopped by Sweetie's door and knocked gently.

"Go away!" Sweetie yelled before I could speak.

"Sweetie, it's me, Candy."

I heard a deep sigh. The latch glowed, and the door opened a crack. I pushed it fully open with a hoof and stepped inside. Sweetie sat scowling on her haunches on her bed, her fore-legs crossed. She turned her head towards me, her eyes glistening. "What do you want?" she said in a sharp but quavering voice.

"Just seeing if you're okay."

"No, I'm not." She took a deep breath and said in a softer voice, "But there's nothing you can do about it."

"I'm sorry about what happened." It sounded as lame to my ears as it had in my head, but nothing else seemed appropriate. The alternative was to take sides.

"Look at it this way," Sweetie said. "She'll probably take you to the Gala instead."

I wanted to go, but not like that. As I struggled to think of something to say, Rarity called out, "Candy! No more dawdling! Come down at once."

Sweetie Belle faced me. "You better go. You don't want her mad at you, too."

I nodded. "We'll talk later, okay?"

Sweetie managed a tiny smile. "Okay."

I cantered down the stairs. "Sorry for the delay," I said as I entered Rarity's workroom.

"It's fine," Rarity said in a lower but still tense voice. "Do you remember the specifications for the thread?"

I nodded. "Cerulean, check that it stands out slightly against blue sky, slightly stretchy, shiny but not flashy, and check for stray strands that show the weave is inferior."

"Good. Perhaps something will go right this morning."

"Um, yeah, I kinda heard your, uh, discussion with Sweetie Belle." When Rarity didn't reply, I asked in a tentative voice, "Are you really thinking of not taking her to the Gala?"

"It would allow you to go in her stead."

My eyes widened, and I nearly recoiled before I could catch myself.

Rarity shook her head. "Forget I said that. That was ... thoughtless. Not that I wouldn't love to see you in that dress again. With a few accessories, it would be perfect for the Gala."

I smiled. The dress she had created for me for the summit had been on my mind recently. I had carefully stowed it in my closet when I had first moved in. As much as I trusted her fashion sense, I really didn't want to see the dress altered. "Thank you, but ... well ... one thing I was afraid of when you started fostering me was that Sweetie Belle would see me competing for your attention."

"Yes, you're right." Rarity sighed. "I really don't want to deny her something I had promised her. I simply wish she hadn't put me in this position. I can't seem to get her to realize how concerned I am for her safety."

"Well, didn't she say it worked out in the end? Okay, yeah, all Sweetie told me about it at first was the bit about helping that stallion figure out what his cutie mark meant. I didn't even know something like that could happen."

"Nor did I," Rarity said in a soft voice.

"She pretty much gushed over it. I think she's even proud of it. I mean, yeah, she did something dumb, but this whole cutie mark thing is supposed to be important, right? So maybe by helping this pony, she--"

"You've made your point," Rarity said. "Now go about your errands. Please."

Some things didn't change across worlds or species, and that included a mother's "end of discussion" tone. I headed out without another word.

The pendant glowed as Twilight worked her magic while we stood in the castle library. A flicker of energy briefly enveloped my body, my fur and hair feeling like they were standing on end before it dissipated. Twilight lifted her head and smiled. "There! The shield is in place."

I glanced down as the residual glow faded. "So how does it work?"

"It will detect an incoming violent blow and activate a shield around you that will absorb it," Twilight explained. "But it won't ward against a softer touch, so you don't have to worry about it activating when you're hugged or something like that."

I had indeed entertained the notion that I would be walking around with a big energy bubble around me, much like the protection field used on my pendant when I was in the hospital. While I was happy not to look like I was inside a giant hamster-ball, I would have liked some sign that it was active. "So, um, are you sure this will work?"

"Positive," said Twilight. "I tested it thoroughly before you arrived."

Just as she spoke, Spike waddled into the chamber, covered in cushions strapped to every part of his body, forcing his arms out straight. "Does that mean I can take this off?" came his muffled voice from behind a protective face mask.

I placed a hoof over my mouth and tried not to giggle.

Twilight blushed. "Oops!" Her horn glowed, and Spike's protections flew off and into a neat pile in a far corner. "Sorry about that."

"Thanks," said Spike. "But, yeah, Candy, no worries at all. It worked perfectly." His eyes slid to the side as he added in a lower voice, "Once she worked out a few problems."

That explained the Spike-sized hole I had seen in one of the windows on my way in.

"These spells really are more of a precaution than anything else," said Twilight. "It's unlikely that Sevfivtoo will get close to you even if she does attempt to enter Ponyville."

"Why's that?"

"I've placed wards around the periphery of Ponyville to detect the approach of strong magical beings. It can't detect ordinary drones, but a changeling of Sevfivtoo's ability will stand out easily, regardless of what illusions she can cast."

"Twilight, do you have any idea what to do about that changeling?" I still resisted calling it by name. I preferred it remain a nameless monster, as that made it easier to deal with.

Before Twilight could respond, a soft gong-like sound echoed through the castle. "Spike, could you see who's at the front door?"

"Will do," said Spike as he headed away.

"The front door?" I asked.

"Yes, it chimes when somepony other than my close friends arrive," said Twilight. "Anyway, no, I haven't had a chance to make any headway. I've been more focused on unraveling the enigma of Starswirl and the pendant."

I quelled my initial response, as I didn't want to tell the Princess of Magic how to do her job. I tried to roll with it instead. "Have you found anything about that, then?"

"Only a new approach to take." She turned towards the table where several books lay. "The problem is that Starswirl didn't keep a journal of what he did during the time period when he created the pendant, but perhaps his colleagues, peers, and friends did." She picked up the topmost book. Its yellowed pages, held in a binding riddled with tiny cracks, crinkled softly as Twilight carefully opened the book. "I'm hoping to find somepony in whom he confided a key detail."

"Where did you get those books?" I asked. "I don't recall seeing any that old here before."

She closed the book and set it down gently. "I had them rushed from the Canterlot archives." She sighed. "Though I don't like the idea of finding something in them that Princess Celestia or Princess Luna didn't already know."

"Huh? I don't understand."

"Starswirl was very good friends with them," Twilight said. "That is, until he returned from the sabbatical he supposedly took during which I believe he was really crafting the pendant. Princess Celestia said he became withdrawn and defensive for a while after that, and it strained their friendship. It got better in time, but they never learned what had disturbed him so."

I actually understood that. I sometimes had confided things in Michelle that I hadn't dared tell my mother.

Twilight slowly smiled. "Anyway, I shouldn't make assumptions, and I shouldn't keep you if you have other errands to run."

"It's okay." I honestly had no idea what I had expected, but I felt a vague sense of disappointment. I wanted to prod her into doing more to help Michelle manifest, but I didn't want to seem whiny. "But, yeah, I guess I should get going."

Spike stepped into the room, frowning slightly.

"Who was at the door, Spike?" Twilight asked.

"It's Matilda," Spike said. "She's waiting for you in the council room."

Twilight gave him a surprised look. "Matilda? Really?"

"Who's Matilda?" I asked.

"A friend who's getting married in another month or so, but I'm sure it's not about that."

"Oh, yes, it is," Spike muttered.

"Does she absolutely need to talk to me about it now?" She gestured towards the pile of old books. "I have a lot of reading to do."

"Trust me, you're going to want to talk to her."

Twilight sighed. "All right. Candy, would you like to come along so you can meet her?"

While I didn't want to delay my errand for Rarity -- especially considering her mood -- the council room was on the way out of the castle. "Sure."

Twilight smiled and trotted towards the door. "You coming along, Spike?"

Spike shook his head. "Nope. I can hear you yelling from here."

Twilight chuckled. "Don't be silly, Spike. What could she possibly tell me that would make me yell?"

"You want to invite a WHAT to the wedding?!" Twilight yelled.

Matilda was not a pony but a donkey. She was also insane, at least from my perspective. In Twilight's defense, not only would I have yelled, I wanted to yell right along with her.

"A changeling," said Matilda. "Cranky said not to bother you about this, Princess, but I thought it best to check."

"Why in Equestria would you want a changeling at the wedding?!" Twilight cried.

"Why wouldn't I want a dear friend at the wedding?"

"What? A friend??"

"Yes, Kevin has been a very good friend of my family for several years now."

Twilight stared. "This ... this is a joke, right?"

If it was a joke, I didn't find it the least bit funny. "Changelings don't have regular names," I said in a curt voice. "Just numbers."

Matilda smiled. "Well, to be honest, his full name is Kayfivsevate, but he prefers 'Kevin'."

This was too surreal even by Equestrian standards. I knew I should keep my mouth shut, but emotion overruled rationality. "Twilight, you're not really going to let this happen, are you?"

"Young lady," said Matilda. "Perhaps this is best left to adults to work out."

"Matilda ..." Twilight began.

"Excuse me, but I don't think so!" I snapped. "You're not the one with a friend who was killed by one of those things!"

Matilda gasped and recoiled. "What are you saying?? D-do you seriously believe Kevin would--"

"I sure as Tartarus don't want to find out."

Matilda frowned and stepped up to me. "Kindly be careful of your language. I may not be your mother, but--"

Twilight interrupted my retort when her horn glowed, suffusing both Matilda and I in her magic. Twilight picked us up, separated us from one another, and placed us gently back down. "Candy! Matilda! Enough! Will everypony please calm down?"

"I'm sorry, Twilight," I said, my voice still terse. "With everything that's happened the past few days, I'm a little on edge."

"I know," said Twilight. "But nothing is going to be solved by yelling at each other. I'm sorry I instigated that myself earlier."

"I'm also sorry, Princess," said Matilda. "I had hoped that the changeling scare was over since the summit has come and gone."

"There's been a lot more going on that you don't know about."

Matilda turned her gaze towards me. "I'm sorry to hear about your friend," she said in a contrite voice. "But Kevin truly would do nothing of the sort."

I refrained from snapping off another irritated retort long enough for Twilight to turn to Matilda and say, "I'm really sorry, but I have to ask. Are you sure you're not being influenced in any way by this changeling?"

"Please, Princess, call him Kevin."

"Kevin, then. Is there any chance he may simply be feeding off you?"

Matilda smiled. "If he is taking in any emotions from me, they're freely given due to our friendship. If it helps any, except when I first met him, he's never appeared to me in anything but his real form."

I frowned. The memory of confronting Sevfivtoo returned to me in sharp detail. I shivered as I recalled the coldness of its eyes and that indifferent stare.

"Candy is right in that a changeling did kill her friend," Twilight said. "And it's still loose somewhere in the vicinity of Ponyville. So you can understand why we're a little hesitant."

A little hesitant? Why wasn't Twilight just outright denying Matilda's request? This was a goddamned no-brainer. I didn't need to be an alicorn princess to figure that out.

"You really wouldn't be so worried about him if you knew him," said Matilda.

"Just how did you get to know him, if I may ask?" said Twilight.

"He was one of the changelings who arrived during the initial attempt to, ah, invade Canterlot," Matilda explained. "He told me he wasn't very happy with the idea in the first place. When you and your friends began fighting the changelings to try to get to the Elements of Harmony, he was sure this meant the invasion was doomed. He left Canterlot and hid in the woods for a while. Then when the invasion did fail, he decided to travel about Equestria and find a place for himself."

Twilight's mouth fell open. "He ... he traveled all over Equestria?"

"Oh, yes, indeed. I met him while visiting some relatives in Baltimare."

"And nopony ever caught him?" I blurted.

"Well, nopony quite was looking for him, dear," said Matilda.

I just stared and muttered, "I don't believe this."

"I don't understand," Twilight said. "He's not tied to the hive? To Chrysalis?"

Matilda's smile became uneasy. "He hasn't had a lot of, ah, pleasant things to say about life in the hive. Even less so about Chrysalis. I suspect he was looking for an excuse to set out on his own."

"But that's not how changelings are supposed to operate!" I cried. I looked at Twilight. "Right?"

"It's like I said before, Candy, our knowledge of them is limited," Twilight said.

"Cherry and I have had more knowledge about them than we care to!"

"I know. But maybe Matilda is right and not all of them are like that."

My mouth fell open. "You can't be serious!"

Matilda stepped up to us. "If you could meet Kevin, you would see for yourselves what a nice fellow he is."

"No," I said.

"Candy, please," Twilight began.

I stomped a hoof. "Oh, come on, Twilight! Didn't we just finish casting protection spells on me because of one of them?"

"One of them. And as the Princess of Friendship, I have to consider--"

"You already tried that and look what happened at the summit," I muttered.

Twilight frowned. "That was uncalled for. Please, stop acting so hostile."

My ears flattened as the urge rose to retort that she wasn't my mother so she couldn't tell me what to do. That I thought of Rarity in that moment secured my silence better than any sense of propriety had.

I also quelled the urge to apologize despite seeing the brief but obviously hurt look in her eyes. I had not meant to throw the summit in her face, but I felt I had a right to be angry.

Twilight stepped up to me, and I tried not to glare at her. "Candy, I'm not going to do anything to jeopardize your safety, or the safety of anypony else. Also consider that this is an opportunity to find out more about the changelings. It could help us better protect you and find Sevfivtoo."

"Excuse me, Princess," Matilda said. "Did you say 'Sevfivtoo'?"

Twilight turned towards her. "Yes, I did."

"I remember Kevin mentioning that name."

My frown deepened.

Twilight gasped. "Kevin knows her?"

"Mostly in passing," said Matilda. "Like Chrysalis, he didn't have a lot of nice things to say about her."

"Then this is a perfect opportunity!" Twilight said. "Candy, surely you can see that for yourself."

I clenched my teeth. She was trying to appeal to my intellect, and had I been more emotionally removed from the situation, or had my day not already sucked, it would have likely worked. "Yeah, fine," I muttered as I turned away. "Do what you want. Just leave me out of it."

"But this could benefit you as well," Twilight said as I trotted out of the room. "Candy, wait!"

"I have errands to run!" I shouted as I broke into a gallop.

I uttered a dramatic sigh and released my hold over the thread spool, letting it drop unceremoniously to the table. "No, this isn't right either!"

The merchant pony sighed, and his eyes twitched as if he wanted to roll them but was doing his best not to. "What's wrong with this one, Miss?" he said in a voice somewhere between boredom and irritation.

"It's the right color, the right shine, but not stretchy enough. The last one was stretchy but too shiny. And the one before that had the right color and stretchiness and shininess but was too frayed. Seriously, do I have to repeat the specifications again?"

"I swear, Miss, you're as bad as Rarity."

"I'll take that as a compliment." I pushed the offending thread spool towards him with magic. "Now get me the right one."

The merchant swept up the spool in a fore-hoof. "Fine. Wait here."

"All I've been doing is waiting," I muttered.

The stallion narrowed his eyes and muttered something about "lippy teenagers" before disappearing into his tent.

I sighed and lowered my head. While it felt nice to let off some steam, it battled the guilt incurred by my abuse of the merchant. Worse, I had been holding up the line. Well, a line of one, not including myself, but still. The pony behind me -- a green earth mare with ropey pale red hair -- must have been the most patient pony in Equestria, as she had said not a word nor made the least noise of exasperation. Any time I glanced at her, she wore the same serene smile.

I turned towards her. "Um, hey, sorry about keeping you waiting. You must be getting tired of hearing me complain."

Her smile widened. "Oh, no worries, it's all groovy. I've been enjoying how the interleaving of our auras is really energizing my chakras."

I blinked. "I ... um, okay ... what??"

"You've got, like, an authentically radical vibe. So blissfully down to earth, so energetically grounded, yet so righteously exotic and fresh. It's totally sending me."

That had been either a greeting, a compliment, or a proposition, and I had no idea which was more likely. Or she represented some obscure facet of Equestrian culture I had yet to read about. Or she was insane, and my patience for insane ponies had worn thin.

Before I could say a word, she plowed on. "Even the disturbances I sense in your energy flow I can totally dig. Like, your groove is really aligned the cosmos."

I sighed. "Look, um, no offense, but I have no idea what you're talking about."

Her eyes widened slightly. "Oh, wow, you've got some negative vibes impeding your chakras. I can see why you're feeling a bit bummed out."

"Um, yeah, we'll go with that." I caught a flicker of thankfully familiar yellow-and-pink out of the corner of my eye. I turned my head and called out, "Fluttershy! Hi! Over here!"

"Hello, Candy," Fluttershy said with a smile as she trotted over to us. "I see you've met my friend Tree Hugger."

I stared. "Tree ... Hugger?"

"Blessings," said Tree Hugger. She turned towards Fluttershy. "Fluttershy, you never told me Candy really digs the groove of the cosmos."

"What does that even ... Er, wait, you know my name?"

"She told me all about you. Well, except the most righteous part."

When I gave Fluttershy a helpless look, she blushed faintly. "I, um, decided to let you talk about your origins if you really wanted to."

The last thing I needed was this pony trying to figure out how my alien "vibe" fit into her "groove" and whether it messed with her "chakras" or not. Had Zecora not already set the precedent for a pony sensing I was something other than I appeared, I might have been more alarmed than annoyed.

"I met her while viewing the Breezies," said Fluttershy. "She's the friend I told you about that I'm taking to the Gala."

"Looking forward to it," Tree Hugger said, "I'm getting a really powerful vibe that it's going to be totally righteous. Your cosmic groove would really fit in, Candy."

"Ah, well ..." Fluttershy began.

"I'm not going," I said in a sharper voice than intended.

Tree Hugger's ears drew back slightly. "Bummer."

"Ahem," said the merchant's voice behind me. "Miss?"

I turned around. He pushed a spool of thread towards me. I grabbed it in my magic and went through my checks as quickly as possible, nearly snapping off a piece of thread as I drew it taut and held it up to the light. "Finally." I plopped it in my saddlebag and levitated a number of bits onto the table. I spun around to face the others. "Well, it's been, uh, radical, I guess."

"Totally!" Tree Hugger said, smiling.

"Uh, right, but I have to get going. See you later."

"Um, bye," Fluttershy said in an uncertain voice.

"Have a groovy day," said Tree Hugger.

I sincerely doubted I would.

Jump to top

Chapter 30 - A Most Chaotic Day

I sat before my open closet, staring at the only dress I owned. Rarity had offered to make me another, saying that no filly my age should be without a "varied ensemble" suitable for "turning ponies' heads." I strongly suspected she anticipated me becoming interested in boys ... that is, colts.

I really didn't need another dress. Maybe Rarity thought it looked odd hanging there by itself, but it made it all the more special. I secretly hoped that the next dress I owned would be created by me.

"It really is pretty, Candy."

I jerked my head around. "Oh, hi, Sweetie. I didn't hear you come in."

Sweetie Belle trotted up to me. "I really am sorry you're not going to the Gala."

"I'm just glad you are."

Sweetie smiled as she hopped up on my bed. "Thanks to you."

I didn't deserve all the credit. All I had done was say my piece before heading out on my errands that day. I had tried to broach the topic with Rarity after that, but to little avail.

Sweetie stretched out on her belly, propping her head up with her fore-hooves. "I'm still grounded, though."

"But only for two weeks."

"And there's the wedding coming up after that. I'm looking forward to it. The last wedding I went to, um, kinda got more exciting than I expected."

"Oh?"

"Shining Armor and Princess Cadance."

"Oh, um, that one."

"I heard a rumor that somepony wants to invite a changeling to the wedding," said Sweetie. "Is that true?"

Twilight had given me no indication how quiet to keep the matter. She had little time to spare the day before when she renewed my protection spells before heading off to Canterlot. All I got out of her was that Princess Luna had volunteered to assist in protecting me while Twilight and her friends were at the Gala.

I still thought that donkey was crazy, or likely under a changeling's thrall. Maybe other ponies should know about it. If enough ponies complained, maybe Twilight would be forced to tell Matilda to forget the whole idea. Yet wasn't I trying to use the same tactic that Spoiled Rich had used against me?

"Candy?"

I hated decisions like this. "Um ... I kinda heard something like that, too. I wouldn't worry about it right now, Sweetie. It'll probably turn out to be just that, a rumor."

"I hope so," said Sweetie Belle. "Especially since Rarity is in a good mood now."

"So long as you don't go chasing after it if the rumor does turn out to be true, you'll be fine."

Sweetie rolled her eyes, but a faint smile crossed her muzzle. "I told you, the Crusaders are officially out of the changeling-hunting business. Anyway, it'll give us more time together."

"It will?"

She nodded. "Rarity suggested that we stick together more after the Gala."

My ears rose. "She did?"

Sweetie sat up. "Personally, I think she just wants you to keep an eye on me, but, really, I'm looking forward to it." She smiled. "Maybe I haven't said this, but ... I love having you as a sister."

I had no words. I simply drew her into a tight hug and blinked until my vision cleared. Perhaps that's how she got her name; she really was a little sweetie.

Rarity appeared at the door, spectacles perched on her muzzle and a tape measure draped across her barrel. I broke off the embrace with Sweetie and gently closed the closet door with a magical nudge as she spoke. "Sweetie, please come along, I need to do the final fitting for your dress, and your Crusader friends are here."

Sweetie Belle hopped off my bed. "Coming!"

"They're all going?" I asked.

"Yep!" said Sweetie. "Applejack's taking Apple Bloom and Scootaloo's going with Rainbow Dash."

Rarity smiled at me. "Do you want to see me do the fitting for your friends, Candy? I can explain how it works." She paused. "If you want to, that is."

Rarity was getting as good as Fluttershy at reading my emotions. While it did bother me to be around all this pomp and circumstance over an event that I could not attend, avoiding it felt petty. "Sure, I'll come along."

Sweetie bounded ahead as we traversed the stairs. Apple Bloom and Scootaloo were already in the fitting room. "I almost can't believe this is gonna happen!" Apple Bloom cried.

"You can't imagine what I felt when Rainbow Dash said she was going to take me to the Gala!" Scootaloo said.

"I thought you weren't into that sort of thing, Scootaloo," I said.

"But I'm going with Rainbow Dash!"

"Ah, right," I murmured.

"I'm going to be with the coolest pony in Equestria for a whole evening!"

"I get the point, thanks."

"Isn't this amazing?" Sweetie cried. "I never thought I'd ever get to go!"

"Me, neither!" said Apple Bloom. "But it's really happenin'! We're goin' to the Gala!"

"We're going to the Gala!" Scootaloo cried.

"We're going to the Gala!" Sweetie Belle sang.

Which prompted all three to take up the chorus.

"We're going to the Gala! We're going to the Gala!"

My ears flattened. "Girls ..."

"We're going to the Gala! We're going to the Gala!"

"Girls! Stop!" I shouted.

The Crusaders fell silent. "Sorry," Apple Bloom said in a contrite voice. "Sweetie told us that you're not goin'."

"We're really sorry you won't be there," said Scootaloo.

"It's fine." I turned toward Rarity. "I think I'll go take a walk."

Rarity placed a hoof on my shoulder. "I understand, dear."

"You sure you don't want to stay to see our dresses?" asked Sweetie.

I smiled faintly. "I'll get a chance to see them later before you leave."

"I really will miss you at the Gala."

I gave Sweetie a hug. The other Crusaders smiled at me. "We'll do somethin' together real soon, I promise!" Apple Bloom said.

"Thanks," I said in a low voice before heading out.

Fine, so maybe I was being petty after all.

I kept telling myself that my emotions wouldn't be this chaotic if it hadn't been for Matilda's little surprise, but I wasn't sure how much I believed that. I wished Twilight had made a decision about it before the damn Gala.

I wandered about town, but my thoughts ran in upsetting circles. I stopped in Sugarcube Corner hoping Pinkie's company might pick up my spirits, only to nearly collide with the pink mare while she balanced a tower of cake boxes in her hooves. She dropped them and whirled around, frowning. "What?!"

My ears flattened, and I backed up a step.

"Oh, um, hi, Candy," Pinkie said in a more contrite voice. "Sorry. What can I do for you? You don't happen to want to buy a cake or two ... or a hundred ... do you?"

"Or a ...?" My eyes widened. Cake boxes lay everywhere, in stacks on the floor, on the counter, and on shelves. "Um, no, not really."

Her hair deflated slightly, and she plopped down on her haunches. "I didn't think so. Oh, well."

"Um ... what happened?"

"Discord happened!"

My tail twitched.

"First he says he wants all the cakes, and then he wants none of the cakes!" Pinkie swept her foreleg before her. "Now what am I supposed to do with all these cakes? I already had breakfast! I mean, Discord does some crazy stuff sometimes, and he means well, and he doesn't always mean to be mean, but this was just plain ... mean! You know what I mean?"

I didn't, and I really didn't want to. "Maybe I should go."

Pinkie sprang back up on her hooves. "If you find anypony who wants lots of cakes, send them my way! Please? Pretty please??"

"Uh, yeah," I said as I slowly backed away. "I'll do that."

I made a hasty exit, frowning. I wished I had not been confined to Ponyville, as some time away from this place sounded like a good idea.

"Candy Swirl?"

Great. Now what?

I sighed before turning towards the unfamiliar voice. A smiling purple earth mare with a two-tone pink mane trotted towards me. "Um, yeah, that's me." Just how many ponies knew me on sight?

"My name is Cheerilee," she said cheerfully. "I'm Sweetie Belle's teacher."

"Oh, yes," I said in a more relaxed voice. "Sweetie mentioned you."

"I was hoping you could tell me how she and her friends are doing."

"Doing?"

"I spoke with Miss Rarity the other day," said Cheerilee. "She mentioned that Sweetie and her friends got into a bit of trouble in Appleloosa."

"Yeah, they did," I said. "It seems like Rarity worked it out with Sweetie Belle, though."

Cheerilee smiled. "Then she took my advice?"

I tilted my head. "Advice?"

"I suggested she let Sweetie Belle go the Gala."

I smiled. "Thank you! She would've been really disappointed if she couldn't go."

"Happy to help!" Cheerilee said. "I also spoke with Scootaloo's mother. Seems she was considering keeping her daughter from the Gala as well. I think I managed to convince her otherwise."

"Sweetie will be happy to hear that. She and her friends seem to be inseparable." I refused to dwell on the fact that I would be separated from them. I just wanted to be happy for them and not wallow in my own petty laments. "Did you talk to Applejack, too?"

"I asked Miss Rarity to talk to her," said Cheerilee. "I'm sure she'll be fair and let little Apple Bloom go."

"I really hope so." I paused. "So what made you want to talk to me?"

"Miss Rarity told me a lot about you, so when I saw you, I just had to introduce myself."

"Um, really?" I said in a dubious voice. "I'm not all that special."

"According to Sweetie Belle you are, from what Miss Rarity said. She thinks you're a good influence on little Sweetie, and I agree with her. And you're just so sweet to be concerned for her friends as well."

My cheeks felt warm. Was I actually blushing?. "Well, thank you. I really do like her. I've been spending a lot of time with her lately. She's ... she's like a little sister to me."

"Oh, that's simply wonderful to hear." Cheerilee's eyes flicked slightly to the side. "Anyway, I've taken enough of your time. Have a great day!"

"I'll certainly try."

She turned and started trotting away.

"Candy?" came Fluttershy's voice approaching from behind me.

I turned around. My initial relief at hearing a familiar voice faded when I saw Tree Hugger trotting along beside her. "Uh, hi."

Fluttershy looked troubled as she glanced past me. "Was that Miss Cheerilee you were talking to?"

"Yeah, she said she was Sweetie Belle's teacher," I said. "That is true, right?"

"Of course. Why do you ask?"

"You look upset."

"I'm a little concerned about Discord," said Fluttershy.

"That seems to be going around." I glanced at Tree Hugger. She was looking past me, her usual serene smile fading as she stared.

"Really? Did he finally talk to you?"

"Not me. Something about not buying cakes at Sugarcube Corner. You'd have to talk to Pinkie for the details."

"Oh, goodness. Maybe he really is upset after all."

"Over what?" Not that I really cared for the creature's emotional state.

"He thought I was going to invite him to the Gala," Fluttershy said. "I had assumed he would have his own ticket."

"His own ...?" I trailed off. Why Princess Celestia would invite somepony like him to such an event was beyond me. The idea of Discord and Fluttershy was even more ... no, definitely not going there.

"And then he met Tree Hugger. I thought they had hit it off okay, but after we got to talking about it, she thought he seemed kind of tense. I'm worried that he doesn't really like her after all."

"So, like, totally unauthentic," said Tree Hugger.

Fluttershy gasped. "Really? But you seemed to be okay with him earlier."

Tree Hugger continued to stare past me. "Not him, Fluttershy. Her."

"Huh?" I glanced behind me. "You mean Miss Cheerilee?"

"Her vibe was really bumming me out," said Tree Hugger. "It was draining my chakras until I grounded my energy flow."

"But she's the teacher at the Ponyville grade school," Fluttershy said. "You hardly even really met her."

Tree Hugger closed her eyes and placed a hoof to her chest. "I know what her aura tells me, Fluttershy. Maybe her groove is off. Everypony has a bummer of a day sometimes."

Yeah, like mine, and getting worse. I really needed some time to myself where ponies didn't walk up to me left and right. Sometimes I missed the more impersonal atmosphere of New York. "Well, I better get going."

"Um, Candy, wait," said Fluttershy. "Can I talk to you for a moment?"

What now? "Yeah, sure," I said in a resigned voice.

Fluttershy turned to Tree Hugger. "Can I meet up with you later? I thought we might go to lunch together."

"Radical idea, Fluttershy," said Tree Hugger. She turned to me and smiled. "Peace."

"Uh, yeah, peace," I murmured.

Fluttershy waited until Tree Hugger was out of earshot before turning to me. "Um, Twilight told me about what happened in the castle concerning Matilda and her friend Kevin."

Great. "If you're worried that I'm mad at Twilight--"

"I'm more worried about you."

"I'm fine," I snapped.

"You don't sound like it."

I forced myself to take a deep breath. Fluttershy was the one pony I never wanted to yell at. "Maybe I just don't like the idea of Twilight inviting the enemy into town."

Fluttershy's gaze flicked to the side. "I don't like the idea of a changeling in town either."

"Then you can understand how I feel."

"I do," said Fluttershy. "But ... but I ..."

"What 'but' is there?" I cried. "A changeling killed Cherry! Yeah, her spirit is still with me, but what happens if that changeling gets a hold of my pendant?"

Fluttershy brought her eyes to mine, and they glistened as her mouth opened and closed several times as if she were struggling to find the right words. "Twilight believes a-as we all do in giving second chances."

I clenched my teeth. "You are not going to tell me that Sevfivtoo deserves--"

"No, not her," Fluttershy said quickly. She sighed and lowered her gaze. "I don't think any of us could ever give her a second chance."

"Fluttershy, please, what's your point?"

"Kevin is not like Sevfivtoo," Fluttershy said in a flat voice.

I frowned. "You don't believe that."

Fluttershy hesitated. "I ... I have to believe that."

"Why? You have no idea if Matilda's story is true!"

"I know, but what if it is? What if he could give us important information? What if he could help protect you?"

"Then let Twilight handle it!" I snapped. "I don't need to be involved. I don't need to go near that thing."

Fluttershy sighed.

"What is it?" I demanded. "Do you really want me to go meet that changeling?"

"I didn't say that."

"Would you feel safe in a room with him?"

Fluttershy swallowed, her eyes glistening. "I ... n-no, I don't think I could go near him."

"So what do you want from me?"

Fluttershy averted her eyes. "I just ... I just don't want you to hate him."

I wanted to scream at her. Why shouldn't I hate him? Why shouldn't I hate all changelings? Didn't I have a right to feel that way? Instead, I took a deep breath, and when I spoke again, my voice was a little more calm. "Fluttershy, I think I understand where you're coming from. You don't hate anypony, but not everypony can be the Element of Kindness."

"I don't mean that." Fluttershy slowly brought her eyes to mine. "And ... I do know what it means to hate. I'm s-starting to feel that way towards Sevfivtoo."

My eyes widened. Was I hearing this right?

"I don't like this feeling," said Fluttershy in a sad voice. "And I don't think Twilight liked it either when she felt it."

Even as stunned as I was to hear her admit this, it didn't change my own attitude. "But even Princess Celestia said Twilight wasn't expected to stop having feelings like that. Can't that apply to you, too?"

"I know, but I'm ... I ..." Fluttershy shook her head. "This isn't what I wanted to say. This wasn't supposed to be about me."

This reminded me far too much of the one blow-up I had with Michelle when she had told me she wanted to help the drug addicts in her old neighborhood. Michelle had her misgivings about it, and I was no help at all in resolving them. If Fluttershy were looking for that sort of insight from me, she would be disappointed.

She brought her gaze to mine. "I've seen how much pain Twilight felt from her hate, and I don't want that happening to you. I don't want to see you in any more pain."

I looked away for a moment. I wanted to take her concern at face value, but did she really understand my feelings at all? Was my experience so alien to her? I wished I had the strength to see it from her perspective. Instead, all I could do was say, "If you don't want to see me in pain, then convince Twilight to keep that changeling out."

"Twilight won't do anything that would endanger you, Candy."

"Then that should make her decision easy, shouldn't it?"

Fluttershy sighed. "I ... I guess."

An awkward silence settled over us. I still didn't understand what she wanted from me, or what she expected me to do. The conversation felt as muddied as my thoughts. "Um ... anyway ... I'm sorry I got upset."

I really wasn't sorry, but I didn't want to go away with bad feelings between us. Fluttershy averted her eyes for a moment. "No, it's fine. Um ... do you want to go to lunch with us?"

"I think I need some time alone right now."

"I understand. I'll see you later."

I galloped away before I could change my mind.

So had things become more complicated yet again, or was I simply making them more complicated than they needed to be?

I had not wanted to recall Chrysalis' words, but one particular part of her bombast crystallized in my head: I know a little of the history of your world. Groups of beings persecuted for their beliefs, their culture, or simply for what they looked like. Wasn't I doing the same thing?

I trotted through a quiet park and picked a bench sitting in the shade of a large tree, hoping it would obscure me from the gaze of ponies who happened past. I settled on my haunches with a sigh. My stomach rumbled. I wished I had thought to ask Rainbow Dash where that hayburger place was. I could have gone for the Equestrian equivalent of comfort food.

I frowned and shook my head. I had no business finding any sort of truth in Chrysalis' words. She had crafted them specifically to garner the response she had wanted. Didn't the changelings' very nature make them evil? Why make it more complicated than that?

I placed a hoof over my pendant and sighed. All this time spent in seeking solitude, and now I needed somepony to talk to after all.

A flash of light to my side, and I suddenly got my wish. For a moment, I assumed Twilight had teleported next to me, until I felt an arm ending in a large paw draped across my shoulders. My uninvited companion spoke, and I froze.

"Why, hel-lo there my dear, dear friend Candy Swirl! How is the life of a pony treating you these days?"

I bolted from the bench and whirled around. My heart thumped, and my stomach twisted as my gaze rested upon a vision I had hoped never to see in anything other than books.

Discord.

He was dressed in an orange suit with a red bow-tie and matching top hat. He smiled and reached into his suit, pulling out a gold ticket. "Guess what the postpony finally delivered, my dear," he said in a low, conspiratorial voice. "One ticket to the Grand Galloping Gala. And there's simply nopony in this universe I would rather take than you. So what do you say? Shall we dance in the moonlight together?"

My rationality collided with his absurdity, and common sense flew out my ears. I did exactly what I had originally envisioned if I had ever met him again: I grabbed the nearest large rock with my magic and hurtled it as hard as I could at his stupid head.

Discord's head and top hat vanished, and for a heart-stopping moment I thought I had managed to decapitate him. Instead, he reached his paw into his neck and pulled out head and hat with a comical pop. He sighed and folded his arms. "I'll take that as a 'no' then."

"You ... I ... how ...!" I sputtered.

"I'm sure I gave you better diction than that when I made you into a pony. Perhaps you should consider some remedial lessons with your new pal Miss Cheerilee."

All the frustration of the past week boiled up and over. "You rip me out of my world. You turn me into a pastel-colored pony. You tell me nothing about what's really going on with my pendant. You completely ignore my struggle with Chrysalis! You actively avoid me even after all that's over! And now when you actually do come to talk to me, it's only to ASK ME OUT ON A DATE?!"

Discord tapped his chin with his claw as he listened, his brow furrowed as if in serious thought. "Well, since you put it that way ..." He smiled and clasped claw and paw together. "Yes!"

My mouth dropped open. Words finally had ceased to be an adequate vent. I lowered myself to the ground, covered my head with my fore-hooves, and let out a scream.

"Could I consider that a 'maybe?'" said Discord.

I rose to my hooves. "If I live to be a hundred, I'll never be so desperate to attend an event that I'd go with the likes of you!" I bellowed.

"Well, that's a bit harsh, now, isn't it?"

"Haven't you heard a word I said?!"

Discord rolled his eyes. "Yes, of course, terrible old Discord, sending you to a world where you're subjected to all this horrible friendship."

"Yes, I ... but ... you ..." I stomped a hoof. "Stop changing the subject!"

"Oh, but that is the subject, my dear, and it has been very much on my mind as of late."

I clenched my teeth. "Fine. Yeah, I've made friends here, okay? That's not the point, not with what's been--"

Discord narrowed his eyes. "Some particular friends have been on my mind, like those who don't invite their supposed friends to the Gala."

"Don't go there. Rarity explained this to me. She already had promised Sweetie Belle, and I didn't--"

Discord frowned. "And then they replace you with somepony who spews nonsense about 'vibes' and 'grooves.'"

I tilted my head. "Wait, are we talking about the same thing?"

Discord threw up his arms, which detached and flew into the air above his head. "Oh, never mind all that!" He snapped the talons of one of his disembodied arms. His suit became black, and he sported a matching, long, thin mustache. His arms dropped back into place, and he twirled the mustache in his paw as he leaned towards me. "I have my own reasons for being at the Gala now. All you need to do is say what a wonderful time you're having, make a certain somepony insanely jealous, and then you can trot off and do whatever you like."

I stared. "What?? You think I want any part of your stupid scheme? Don't think I haven't read up on you!"

"But that was the old me!" Light flashed, and a duplicate Discord sat next to him, cackling malevolently ... and wearing the same black suit and mustache, twirling the latter in the same manner.

I raised an eyebrow.

Discord stopped twirling his mustache and looked at his duplicate. He frowned and shoved it to the side, where it vanished. He snapped his talons, and his suit returned to its original orange and red, the mustache gone. "This is the new me! And the new me can be anything you want."

I sighed. "Look, will you please just--"

"Are you the romantic type?"

I recoiled. "What?!"

He suddenly held a bouquet of flowers in one arm and dropped to his knees before me. "Oh, but there is no blossom as pretty as you." A heart-shaped box of chocolates appeared in his other arm. "Nor are there any candies as sweet as your very name."

I backed up a step. "O-kay, this is seriously weirding me out."

"Oh, ponyfeathers!" Discord stood and threw the flowers and chocolates to either side. "Tell me what you want! Throw me a bone, and not at my head this time!"

I knew I shouldn't take the bait, but I did anyway. "Fine! You want to know what I want? I want answers!"

"Very well."

"And I won't take 'no' for ... er ... huh?"

Discord smiled and lifted an arm. "I'll give you answers." A covered silver tray appeared balanced on his claw. "In fact, I'll give you the answer."

I tilted my head. "The answer?"

Discord's smile turned sly as he lowered the tray towards me. "The answer to everything lies here. Are you sure you're ready? Are you sure you can handle it? Because once you know ... there's no going back."

I hesitated, my heart thumping as I reached out with my magic and slowly lifted the cover ...

... and on the tray was the number "42."

I threw the cover to the side. "Stop it!"

"What? You have the answer to everything right there, with life and the universe thrown in for good measure. What more do you want?"

I knocked the tray away with my hoof. "Stop playing games with me!"

Discord sighed. "And here I thought you would appreciate some humor from your world. You really do play hard to get."

"I'm not playing hard to get!" I roared. "I mean ... that is ... arrgh, never mind! Just leave me alone!"

I turned and started to canter away from him, only to stop short when he suddenly appeared right in my path. I stumbled back a step as he spoke. "Really, Candy, I thought you were somepony who could figure things out for herself. Don't you want to feel the joy of discovery?"

"Are you serious?!" I yelled. "I have a changeling after me!"

"Oh, and you're so important that this changeling would go out of her way to kill poor little pony you."

"Of course it would! It's killed before, and I have the pendant it wants!"

Discord conjured a large thermometer. "Try again."

I tilted my head. "Are you saying it's not trying to kill me?"

The red fluid inside the thermometer crept upwards, and Discord smiled. "You're getting warmer."

"But it still wants the pendant?"

The fluid shot up. "Even warmer!"

"But ... if it still wants the pendant ... and it won't come to me ... is it seriously expecting me to go to it?"

The fluid almost pegged the top of the thermometer. "You're red-hot now, dear Candy!"

"But Chrysalis already tried that!" I cried. "Why would she think that I'd be stupid enough to hand it to one of her drones when ..."

I trailed off as the fluid dropped precipitously, turned blue, and icicles formed at the bottom of the thermometer. "And you were doing so well." Discord tossed the thermometer over his shoulder.

"This is ridiculous," I growled. "Why can't you give me a straight answer?"

"I do have a reputation to live down to, you know," said Discord. "Spirit of Chaos and all that. And here you said you were so well-read on me."

It took all my willpower not to perpetuate a verbal volley that would continue to go nowhere. Perhaps he had indeed given me a clue, and I was too wound up to realize it. I sighed and muttered, "And I thought Tree Hugger was bad."

Discord snorted. "Don't get me started on that pony. But I will say one good thing about her. She's just like a broken clock."

I looked askance at him. "Huh?"

"She can be right twice a day."

"What in Tartarus are you talking about?"

"But back to more important matters," said Discord. "What time shall I pick you up?"

My eyes widened. "Time ... I ... what??"

"You do tend to say that word a lot. I'm sure I gave you a greater vocabulary than that."

"I'm not going to the Gala with you!" I bellowed.

Discord's eyes widened. "What?? Ugh, see, now you've got me doing it!"

"What made you think I would ever go with you?" I demanded.

"Because I gave you the answers you wanted!" Discord declared. "Do you always toy with the affections of others this way?"

"I'm not toying -- I never said I would go with you regardless of what you did."

Discord clenched his teeth and growled. He leaned down until we were snout-to-muzzle. "Fine. You know what? I don't want to take you after all."

I narrowed my eyes. "Best news I've heard all day!"

"In fact, I'd rather take a gelatinous pile of green ooze to the Gala than you!" He drew himself up. "Well, ta-ta, Candy Swirl. You had your chance for a wonderfully chaotic evening."

And in a flash of light, he was gone.

"Like I need your help for my life to be chaotic," I muttered.

I let out a startled cry as a miniature Discord suddenly appeared perched on my muzzle. "Be careful, my dear Candy. I could give you chaos on a level you cannot even imagine. But then again, you're well on your way to finding it yourself."

He winked and vanished.

Jump to top

Chapter 31 - Realization And Resolve

Any lingering resentment I felt over not going to the Gala evaporated when I saw Sweetie Belle in her elegant little dress while I ate a late lunch in the kitchen of the boutique. I smiled despite my still jumbled thoughts from my encounter with Discord. "You really look lovely, Sweetie."

"I still can't believe that mean old Discord tried to get you to go with him," Sweetie said.

My ears drew back slightly. "Maybe I should've gone with him anyway just to get to go to the Gala."

I had not been serious, but as Rarity trotted into the room wearing her dress, she voiced her opinion. "No, Candy, you did the right thing in refusing that ruffian. As much as I don't care for his presence at the Gala, at least he won't be here in Ponyville harassing you. The nerve of him, thinking he can toy with your affections like that!"

I nearly choked on a bite of salad. "Er, right."

"But who's he going to take if Candy refused him?" Sweetie asked.

Rarity sniffed. "I'm sure it will be somepony more suited to his, ahem, tastes. We'll have to trust that Twilight and Princess Celestia will ensure he'll mind his manners."

I sincerely had my doubts about that.

"Sweetie, I need to check on a hem on my dress that looks a tad frayed," said Rarity. "I should be only a few minutes. Meet me in the front by then so we can head to the train station."

"Okay," said Sweetie.

"And do be careful, please. You don't want that dress stained."

Sweetie rolled her eyes. "Okay, okay!"

Rarity smiled before heading out.

"She just wants this to be a great night for you," I said.

Sweetie smiled. "I know, but if I didn't complain to her now and then, she'd think I'd been replaced with a changeling or something."

I frowned. "Don't even joke about that, Sweetie. It's really not funny."

Her smile faded. "Oh, um, sorry." She paused. "You sure you're going to be okay by yourself?"

"I'm told Princess Luna will be keeping an eye on me."

"That's good. She's really cool. She helped me once deal with some guilt I had over, um, something I did to Rarity that I really shouldn't have."

"You'll have to tell me that one when you get back."

She blushed. "Mmmaybe ..."

While I looked forward to spending more time with Sweetie after the Gala, that thought suddenly summoned an uneasy feeling that I had on and off since my conversation with Discord. "Hey, um, Sweetie? You really like your teacher, right?"

"You mean Miss Cheerilee? Yeah, she's really nice. I still wish she'd find a special somepony." Sweetie paused. "The Crusaders tried to help her with that once, but ... um ... it didn't end well."

She blushed again, and I smiled. Add another bit of teasing fodder for later. "Does she tend to ask how her students are doing outside of school?"

"Oh, yeah, she's always talking to parents and stuff like that."

I relaxed somewhat. "Well, that's good to hear. I ran into her earlier today, and she was asking about you. Well, you and your friends."

Sweetie blinked. "You did?"

"She apparently helped smooth things over between you and Rarity so you could go to the Gala. She did the same for Scootaloo and Apple Bloom, too."

Sweetie looked surprised. "Really? Huh."

"Something wrong?"

"Well, not really," said Sweetie Belle. "Just that I didn't think she'd be back already."

My heart thumped. "Back? From where?"

"Fillydelphia. She told the class on the last day of the semester that she was spending a few weeks there visiting relatives and attending some sort of teacher conference. I guess she got back a little early."

I swallowed my bite of lunch rather hard, my throat clicking.

"You okay, Candy?" Sweetie asked.

My mind suddenly whirled back to Discord's comment about Tree Hugger. It hadn't made any sense until I recalled her reaction to the departing Cheerilee. But what had Discord meant about being right twice? Did that also refer to when Tree Hugger picked up on my alien origin?

"Um, yeah," I said in a vague voice.

"Are you sure? You look upset."

My heart hammered. Had that really been Sevfivtoo I had spoken to? Why hadn't she taken that opportunity to try to kill me and take the pendant? Why just engage in idle chit-chat? I shook my head. "It's fine, Sweetie, I'm just a bit distracted."

"Sweetie Belle!" came Rarity's voice. "No more dawdling! We need to get going!"

Sweetie turned her head towards the door. "Coming!"

I smiled. "I hope you have a good time."

She reached a hoof across the table. My smile widened as I touched mine to hers. What I had said to Cheerilee was true; Sweetie really did feel like a little sister, and with as much as my heart ached at the idea of anything happening to her, I think I loved her like one.

"I'd hug you, but I don't want to wrinkle your dress," I said softy.

"Then give me an extra one when I get back."

I giggled. "I will, I promise."

Sweetie Belle hopped off her chair.

"And you promise me something," I said as she started for the door. "Promise you'll stick close to Rarity or your friends tonight. Don't be alone."

Sweetie rolled her eyes. "You really are getting as bad as Rarity." In a softer voice she added, "Thanks. I will."

My gaze lingered on her as she trotted out the door. I listened as she and Rarity left the boutique as I stared at the uneaten portion of my lunch. I frowned, wolfed down the rest of my meal, and rushed out of the boutique. I glanced at the retreating tails of Rarity and Sweetie Belle before galloping for the castle. I hoped Spike either had opted not to go or had not left yet.

I suppressed a yawn as I secured the final stitch before pulling the thread taut and snipping it with the scissors. Both it and the needle wobbled as I set them down on the craft table. I rubbed my head at the dull ache under my horn but smiled at my achievement.

The lacy trim I had secured to the edge of a practice dress flared in elegant ruffles that remained undamaged despite my magical manipulation. While this could have been accomplished adequately with the sewing machine, I was forbidden from touching it until I learned to do everything unassisted.

I yawned fully as I trotted out of the workroom. Pale, silvery light streaked across the floor of the otherwise dark hall, the moon hanging low over the horizon. Without the distraction of my work, emotions stirred in restless abandon that precluded sleep. I headed into the kitchen to make some tea to help relax me.

I froze when a gentle knock sounded at the door to the boutique. My hoof briefly flew to my pendant. I trotted to the front room, stopping halfway to the door. "We're closed!" I called out in a quavering voice.

"Perhaps you might make an exception for a friend," said a gentle and familiar voice.

I gasped, smiled, and rushed to the door, opening it with magic before I got there.

"Hello, Candy Swirl," said Princess Luna as she smiled gently. "Might I visit with you for a short while?"

"Of course!" I gushed. "I didn't know you were going to come see me, Princess. I thought you'd be at the Gala and would just look in on me while I slept."

Luna stepped inside, and she closed the door with a push of magic. "I'm not quite as fond of the Gala as my sister, and I'm not as keen on who she likes to invite."

"You don't happen to mean Discord, do you?"

Luna sighed. "Tia seems to believe he would 'liven things up.' I told her to be careful what she wished for."

The mention of Discord brought all my worries flooding back to me. I had worked myself to near magical exhaustion just to keep my mind off them. I could still see Sweetie Belle in that dress as she trotted out of the kitchen. Her words concerning Cheerilee haunted me almost as much as Discord's roundabout clues.

I needed to talk about it. Part of me still insisted I didn't need to bother her with this, but ... well, let's just say the smarter part of me prevailed, just as it had earlier. I had enough of playing to emotions that stopped me from doing the right thing.

"I come bearing a gift," said Luna, breaking me out of my reverie. Her horn glowed, and a cloth bag closed with a braided drawstring emerged from under her wing. She presented it to me.

I took it in my magic, but I had no need to open it. I could smell it easily, my ears rising. Coffee.

"For tomorrow morning, of course," said Luna. "It's a rather strong blend."

"Thank you," I said. "Princess, I was about to make some tea, would you like to join me?"

"I would love to."

"And ... maybe we can talk about a few things that are on my mind."

"Like your encounter with Discord?"

I glanced at her as we headed towards the kitchen. "You know about that already?"

"Twilight received the letter Spike dispatched on your behalf," said Luna. "She had mentioned it."

That helped. It felt less like an imposition now. I had already resolved to speak with Luna, but this made it easier. "It's a little more than that, but, yeah, that's a big part."

"Then by all means, Candy, please enlighten me ..."

It felt as odd as it did good to share a cup of tea with Princess Luna in such an informal setting as Rarity's kitchen. Even more so -- in both respects -- to pour out my concerns to her.

"I checked Twilight's wards as I arrived," said Luna as she set down her cup. "They are undisturbed. I do not believe Sevfivtoo somehow slipped past them."

"So there's no way Miss Cheerilee could've been a changeling?"

"It seems unlikely, but neither Twilight nor I wish to dismiss your concern out of hoof."

"Is there any way to check on her?"

"I will peer into her dreams tonight," said Luna. "It would rule out her having been affected by a changeling recently, or captured and subjected to a changeling cocoon."

I shuddered as I recalled finding Strong Wing in the forest. "When you first visited my dreams, you knew I was in the castle. Could you do the same for her and see if she's really in Ponyville?"

"I could, yes."

"Thank you, Princess." I still shivered a bit at the memory Luna had prompted. "Just ... just what are those cocoon things?"

"They appear to act as both a prison and a convenient means by which to feed," said Luna. "The pony inside can be kept in a dream-like state, having visions which generate emotions that changelings can feed upon."

My stomach turned. "That sounds ... sick."

Luna paused to take a sip of her tea. "It also impairs my ability to walk their dreams, which is why I was unable to assist in finding Strong Wing."

I sighed and looked down into my cup. "I'm worried about Sweetie Belle."

"Twilight had taken precautions even before your letter arrived," said Luna. "She warded the train to Canterlot and intends to do the same with the one back to Ponyville tomorrow morning."

I nodded, feeling a bit more relaxed. "Um, Princess? Can I ask you something that might be personal?"

Luna smiled. "Please ask, Candy Swirl."

"How do you feel about the changelings?"

Luna drew back, looking thoughtful. "Even though I suspected Queen Chrysalis' motives from the start when she suggested the summit, the desire for peace with the changelings runs strong with my sister and I."

That ... didn't really answer my question. It sounded more like a political position. I supposed she felt required to say that, but I had hoped for something more. "Okay, um, I guess I understand."

"I suspect that answer was unsatisfactory."

"Well, yeah, it kinda was," I said in a low voice. "Sorry."

"Please do not be." Luna paused for a long moment. "The changelings are unique in that their behavior is by necessity rather than by choice, at least as far as we know. This makes it hard not just to deal with them, but to know what to think about them."

"I know what I think about them," I muttered.

"Yes, I am aware of that, and it is perfectly understandable given the circumstances."

Maybe that was meant to help me feel better, but it wasn't working. Wasn't this supposed to be a magical fantasy world? Weren't things simply good or evil in places like this? Unfortunately, I had only to look at Discord to completely refute that idea. I couldn't place him in either category.

"I feel wary of them," said Luna. "That best sums up my feelings, and likely those of my sister as well."

"Princess, do you know about Matilda's friend?" I asked.

"Yes, Twilight mentioned it in a letter she sent to my sister and I."

"I don't want anything to do with that changeling."

Luna nodded once. "That is your choice. You cannot be forced to confront your feelings concerning his ilk if you feel it is too soon."

I tilted my head. "Confront?"

"Resolving to hate others is not desirable in the long run," said Luna. "It is almost always simply a step, a means of coping for the moment."

"So am I wrong to hate him? Or changelings in general?"

"No emotion is 'wrong', Candy Swirl. We have them for a reason. We are not machines in that we can turn them on and off at will. But negative emotions which continue unabated can cause problems in the long run." She paused to take another sip of her tea. "If anypony knows that, it would be me. The situation is not exactly the same, of course, and I don't mean to imply you would somehow become a 'Nightmare Swirl' in the future."

I actually grinned slightly at the imagery that conjured.

"But unresolved feelings can eventually cause you pain. I cannot predict how, but it is what I believe, and what I have seen before." Her eyes became distant for a moment. "In a way, it is something I still wrestle with myself."

I lifted my forgotten teacup and scrunched up my muzzle when I found the tea had cooled. After I put it down, it glowed in Luna's magic until the tea steamed once more. "Thank you," I said as I picked it up. "So you're saying I should confront one of them?"

"Perhaps, but when you do is entirely at your discretion."

I took a sip of tea and stared into my teacup, tilting it and watching the liquid slosh about, something of a metaphor for my feelings. "Twilight wants to talk to this changeling herself," I said in a low voice.

"Tia and I believe she should proceed," said Luna. "With adequate security in place, of course. Regardless of your feelings towards him, he could indeed provide valuable information."

Which, of course, would be an ideal time to "confront" him. But to do what? Rail at him for the crimes of his peers? Or for simply being what he is? Or demand some sort of retribution?

While my thoughts stewed, a scroll suddenly popped into existence before Princess Luna. She grasped it with her magic and unrolled it. "This is a missive from my sister," Luna said, her eyes sliding back and forth as she read. "Oh, dear."

My stomach clenched. "What is it?"

"It appears there was an incident at the Gala." Her eyes flicked to me for a moment. "Nothing related to changelings or your pendant, rest assured. It appears centered around Discord. His companion apparently got out of control."

"And who was his companion?"

"Some sort of gelatinous pile of green ooze."

My mouth dropped open.

Luna glanced at me. "Something the matter?"

I groaned and face-hoofed. Maybe I should have gone with him after all. "Nothing. Princess Celestia must be livid."

"Actually, she considers this the most fun she's had at a Gala in a long time."

I simply stared at her.

Luna rolled up the scroll. "My sister is odd that way sometimes. The main thing is, nopony was hurt, and Discord learned a lesson in friendship from Fluttershy."

I waited. When nothing more was forthcoming, I blurted, "That's it?"

The scroll disappeared in a flicker of magic. "Apparently."

So why did it seem like every other problem in this world was solved and wrapped up in a half hour or so but mine continued on with no end in sight?

Luna glanced towards the window. "The hour grows late. I am sure you wish to rest, and I must attend to my nightly dream duties."

I downed as much as the remainder of the tea as I could before setting down the cup. "Princess, Discord had implied that the changeling is expecting me to go to it. What about that?"

"Without knowing Sevfivtoo's plan, it is hard to say," said Luna. "Perhaps Twilight will know more after speaking with this other changeling. For now, it presents an easier means of avoiding trouble: simply do not seek her out."

I had the uneasy feeling it would not be that simple.

I stand upon a field of vibrantly green grass, my gaze cast at my feet. Appearing as a pony in my dreams still eludes me, even when I see other ponies sharing the same imagined reality. When I raise my eyes, my heart aches at the familiar landscape. The castle is set against the same backdrop of white-capped peaks, and water flows nearby.

"Michelle?" I call out.

Grass rustles to my side. "Right here, Rachel."

I whirl around, and my breath catches in my throat. Michelle steps towards me, still in her elegant, flowing purple robe. "Wh-what the hell? Have you found a way to ... no, I'm still asleep."

"Yes, you are," Michelle says as she steps up to me. "This is indeed your dream."

"But I thought you needed energy to interact with me like this."

"Starswirl is stealing a bit of the energy from Twilight's shield spell."

I frown. "I need that spell!"

"This won't weaken it significantly, and Princess Luna is protecting you," Michelle says. "Twilight can renew it once she's back."

Michelle always was the practical one, but I still feel I should have been consulted. "Why are you doing this?"

Michelle turns her gaze towards the castle. "I heard everything that happened in your encounter with Discord. Well ... I hear just about everything that happens around you."

My eyes widen. Given her knowledge of my life in Equestria during our previous meeting, I should have realized this, but it is still a shock. "So much for privacy."

Michelle turns to me. "Rachel, please, this is important. I know this will be hard for you, but I want you present when Twilight speaks to Kevin."

I gape at her. "What?! Why?"

"So Starswirl and I can hear what he has to say."

"You'll get it when Twilight tells me what she learned."

Michelle smiles faintly. "Twilight is very good at what she does, but she sometimes sees things through a bit of a filter. I don't want to risk something being lost in translation."

I tilt my head. "YOU don't?"

Michelle's eyes flick to the side. "I mean us. Starswirl and I."

Am I making too much of that little slip? Yet Michelle tends to be precise with her language. Are they having another difference of opinion?

Her gaze meets mine, and she takes a step forward, her hand alighting on my shoulder. The touch is nowhere as real as it was during out last meeting, and I resist uttering a forlorn sigh. "I'm sorry to have to ask this of you. I know how you feel about the changelings."

"Why don't YOU feel the same way?" I demand. "Why aren't you as angry as I am? Why don't you hate them like I do?"

Michelle's eyes glisten. "I ... I really don't want to discuss that right now."

I swallow hard. I feel as disconnected from her as that night when we had our one huge argument. I place my hand on hers and squeeze gently. I can feel it, yet not feel it. "A-all right, fine. I'll do this. Maybe by then Zecora will have another potion whipped up, and we can talk like we did before."

Michelle lowers her head, a lock of hair falling over one eye. She slowly withdraws her hand and turns away. "About that. It might be better not to do that again."

I stare at her. "Why the HELL not?!"

"Starswirl and I don't want to risk doing anything to damage the pendant."

"But that's ridiculous!"

Michelle gives me a small smile. "As happy as I am to see you mastering unicorn magic, I don't think that quite makes you an expert."

"No, I'm not. But Twilight IS."

"Yes, she is. But she doesn't quite know everything about how the pendant works."

"She intends to find out," I say in a challenging tone. "And ... and I intend to ask her about helping you get out of this thing."

Michelle nods. "We would prefer if Twilight helps me manifest. That's the safer of the--"

"No, I mean permanently. As in get you a new body."

Michelle's eyes become cloudy. "Rachel ... no, please, don't pursue that. Don't let Twilight pursue that."

"Why not?!"

"You'll only be disappointed."

"How do you know?" I demand. "This avatar of Starswirl may have all his knowledge, but it's outdated! Just because HE can't do it doesn't mean no one can!"

"Rachel ..."

"TWILIGHT COMPLETED A SPELL HE COULDN'T! She became a goddamn ALICORN because of it!"

Michelle sighs and lowers her head. "You need to understand, there are simply some things magic cannot do. Please, Rachel, have Twilight focus on assisting my manifestation, as that's something proven to work. We can't take the chance that--"

A tremendous boom reverberates through the dreamscape, shaking the ground. Before either of us can say a word, it is followed by a crack like the crystalline report of delicate glass shattering amplified to deafening proportion. I gasp when my gaze rises to the sky, where the very air itself is coming apart, as if it were only a painted backdrop against a glass dome.

"What's going on?!" I scream.

"Something is breaking into your dream!" Michelle cries.

"Oh, way to state the obvious, Michelle! Just what--"

Another boom-crack reverberates through our reality, and the wound in the sky grows. My heart leaps into my throat, until I see a single midnight-blue leg break through, its hoof adorned in gold.

"Starswirl is trying to keep it out!" Michelle shouts as she grabs my hand. "We need to head into the castle, it's safer there!"

I resist her. "No, wait! It looks like--"

The "intruder" renders the rest of my statement moot. The dream substrate shatters, revealing a star-filled void beyond, and Princess Luna charges through the gap, her horn blazing. She zooms towards the ground and lands next to me. "Candy, are you all right?"

I stare, too shocked for a moment at the worry on her face to respond. "Um ... well, yes, I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?"

Luna shifts her eyes to the side and turns from me. Michelle drops into a curtsy before Luna, bowing her head. "WHY HAST THOU BLOCKED US FROM THIS DREAM?" Luna thunders in a voice that shakes the ground. "WHAT WAS THINE INTENT IN MASKING THIS DREAM FROM US?"

So THAT was the Royal Canterlot Voice. "Why are you yelling at her?" I ask of Luna before turning to Michelle. "Michelle, what's she talking about?"

Michelle rises, her head still bowed. "My apologies, Princess of the Night. Starswirl perhaps was too enthusiastic in protecting this dreamscape from outside influence."

Luna narrows her eyes before turning to me. "When I found I could not access your dream, I feared the worst. When I visited your bedside in the real world, however, you were sleeping normally." She turns to Michelle. "I wish to speak with this avatar of Starswirl."

Michelle sighs. "I'm not sure he--"

"NOW."

I don't understand Starswirl's elusiveness. What is he hiding?

Michelle glances towards the castle. "I will speak with him, Princess."

Luna steps forward. "Perhaps we should accompany you back to the castle."

"As you wish," Michelle says without looking at either of us as she starts walking.

I have never felt so distant from Michelle. I want to walk alongside her, but a sense of dread creeps over me, and I have no idea why. I instead walk with Luna. "Um ... Twilight mentioned that you and Celestia's friendship with Starswirl was strained for a while."

"Indeed," says Luna in a somber voice. "I am trying not to let that color my judgment. I know this avatar is a mere shadow, but it is acting too oddly for my comfort."

"He only wants a good outcome to a bad situation," Michelle says.

"I will be the judge of that," Luna declares.

"There's much you don't know."

"Then I look forward to him dispelling my ignorance."

My heart thumps as my own questions for Starswirl crystallize in my head. Hope soars that I will soon no longer feel like I am flopping about like a fish out of water. As much as I am sometimes caught up in my own volatile emotions, I want to do the right thing. I want to resolve this and move on.

My hopes are shattered when everything vanishes, and Luna and I are left standing in a star-filled void.

"What the fuck?!" I cry. "Michelle! MICHELLE!!"

I am about to start running in the direction I last saw her when Luna wraps a wing around me. "There is no point," she says with a sigh. "The dream has ended."

I spin around to face her. "Can you make it come back?"

"I can interact only with existing dreams," Luna says. "I cannot make them happen nor force them to continue."

"But what about Michelle?"

"I sense she is still safely in the pendant. Her connection to you was simply broken, likely by the avatar of Starswirl."

My hands ball into fists. I could no longer think of this Starswirl as anything other than a prison guard, and I see Michelle's release from the pendant as freeing her from an unjust incarceration.

As if sensing my thoughts, Luna draws close. "I do not like this situation either, but there is little that can be done now. It is best I return you to your rest. Be absolutely sure to inform Twilight of everything that happened."

"I will, Princess," I say. "Oh, did you get a chance to check on Miss Cheerilee?"

"Yes, which is what I was on my way to tell you when I discovered your dream closed to me," Luna replies. "Her dreams were somewhat disturbed, but she shows no sign of being affected by a changeling. She is also in Ponyville."

So was Discord just toying with me, giving me clues as useless as that joke "answer?" Why do I still have an uneasy feeling? I have little chance to think more on it before the starry void fades, and I fall into deeper, dreamless slumber ...

My eyes blinked open, and I squinted at the bright sunlight streaming across the bed. I stretched under the covers and yawned. I draped a fore-leg over my head just under my horn and uttered a long, suffering sigh (in a gesture I would realize only later was very Rarity-like). I closed my eyes as images of the dream flickered across my mind.

When I drew my next breath, however, a rich and delightful aroma tickled my nose and interrupted my thoughts. I crawled out of bed and found the clock. It was just after nine, and the train was not due until ten. My mane was a mess, but the smell was too enticing. I trotted into the kitchen.

"Good morning, Candy Swirl," said Princess Luna. Two mugs of coffee steamed on the table.

I climbed into the chair opposite her. "Um, good morning. Not that I'm unhappy to see you, Princess, but I thought you'd be back in Canterlot by now."

"I need to continue protecting you until the others return."

My heart thumped at the grave tone to her voice. "Something happened, didn't it?"

"There's been an incident involving the train returning from Canterlot," said Luna. "Nopony is hurt, but Twilight and her friends need to finish investigating before they can allow the train to continue."

The fear that should have gripped me never materialized. An unfamiliar but welcome emotion had displaced it: resolve. Screw what Michelle said. I would honor her request concerning Kevin, but I was tired of not getting the answers I wanted. If that meant using Zecora's potion again, so be it.

It was time I started calling the shots.

Jump to top

Chapter 32 - Flaws In The Theory

"Really, Candy, I'm all right," Sweetie Belle said in a soft voice, though she was no more anxious than me to break off the embrace. I had all but scooped her up as soon as she stepped off the train. I blushed faintly as the other ponies looked on, but I didn't care. I caught Princess Luna smiling out of the corner of my eye.

"We kept an eye on her the whole time," Apple Bloom said.

"Yeah, even though we could've been up front getting our monster-fighting cutie marks," said Scootaloo.

"Too bad there ain't no protectin' Sweetie Belle cutie mark, or we woulda gotten ours fer sure!"

Sweetie Belle giggled. She clung to me when I partially broke off the embrace at Rarity's approach. Rarity had not looked very happy when she had first disembarked, but now her lips curled into a smile as she gazed at us.

Rainbow Dash flew off the train. "For the last time, AJ, I'm a pegasus! I know a flying critter when I see one. It had to be a huge bug of some sort."

Applejack trotted out after her. "An' I've been a farmer earth pony my whole dang adult life. I don't care if it had wings, I know a bear when I see one."

"Well maybe one too many apples fell on your head, because that was a big bug!"

"Consarn it, Rainbow, git the clouds outta yer noggin! It was a bear!"

"Bug!"

"Bear!"

"Bug!"

"Bear!"

"Oh, enough, already!" Rarity snapped. "You two have been arguing about it all the way to the station. I'm tired of hearing it."

Scootaloo's ears drooped. "Now I really do wish we got to see it."

"Yeah, tell me 'bout it," Apple Bloom said. "Sure woulda been neat seein' a bear big enough ta stop a whole train!"

Scootaloo raised an eyebrow. "Um, Rainbow Dash said it was a bug."

"Yeah, but Applejack knows these things. It was a bear all right."

Scootaloo frowned and turned to face her friend. "Rainbow wouldn't make a mistake like that. It was a bug!"

Apple Bloom narrowed her eyes. "Well, she did now, an' it was a bear!"

"Bug!"

"Bear!"

"Bug!"

"Bear!"

Sweetie Belle tightened her hug. "Candy, make them stop, please?"

I had already grown as tired of hearing it as Rarity. "Girls, please, cut it out. No use in arguing about it."

Twilight trotted off the train, followed by Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie. "Especially since you may all be right," Twilight announced. "I think that creature shared aspects of both."

I broke off the embrace fully with Sweetie Belle, though she stood close to me. "Just what happened?"

Twilight approached me. "First of all, are you all right?"

"I'm fine. Princess Luna was with me the whole time."

Twilight turned to Luna. "Thank you, Princess, I really appreciate this."

"It was my pleasure, Twilight," said Luna. "If you have things in hoof now, I will return to Canterlot."

"Yes, we can take it from here."

Luna turned to me. "It was good to see you again, Candy Swirl. Hopefully we can meet again under less dire circumstances."

I smiled. "Thanks."

She wrapped a wing around me briefly before leaping into the air. She rose for a few wing-beats before vanishing in a flicker of teleportation magic.

"To answer your question, Candy, we were attacked by a creature I had never seen before," said Twilight. "I thought for sure that the attack was some sort of diversion arranged by Sevfivtoo in order to strike at you in Ponyville, but none of my wards tripped."

"Something did happen while you were gone, but it had to do with Cherry," I said. "I wasn't attacked. The changeling may not be intending to do that."

"Yes, you mentioned that in the letter when you explained your encounter with Discord."

Rarity trotted over to us, a look of disdain on her face. "If Discord is to be believed. After the Gala, I'm having my doubts."

"Still, he's given us valid clues in the past." Twilight looked thoughtful. "And if that's true here, this attack may have been unrelated."

"That don't sit right with me, Twi," said Applejack as she and the others approached. "Jus' seems too convenient that this here bear--"

"Bug!" Rainbow snapped.

"Bugbear!" Pinkie chirped. The other ponies stared at her. "Bearbug, maybe? Or something fancier, like Pandabee? How about Ursawasp? Or maybe Fluttershy should name it!"

Fluttershy swallowed. "Um, all I know is, it was scary. It didn't even respond to my stare."

"Scarybear, then," Pinkie said. "Scarybug? Buggyscare? Or maybe--"

"Bugbear it is," Twilight announced. "At least until I do some research on it."

"Whatever ya wanna call the consarned thing," said Applejack. "I don't like the timin'."

"I still say I should've followed it," Rainbow grumbled, folding her forelegs.

"I didn't want to separate us, Rainbow, in case that had been the intent," said Twilight. "And I'm not going to take any chances, Applejack. I'll assume a connection unless I discover otherwise."

"At least it looked like it was headin' away from Ponyville," said Applejack. "Last thing we need is worryin' 'bout that thing attackin' the town."

"So you really don't know for sure if this had anything to do with the changelings?" I asked.

"Nothing happened on the train when they went to fight the monster," Sweetie Belle said.

"Yeah, and we stuck together the whole time," said Apple Bloom.

"They weren't even gone very long," said Scootaloo.

"Felt like a while to me," said Rainbow Dash. "But time seems to slow down when I'm being awesome."

"It sure do fer those hearin' 'bout it over and over," Applejack muttered.

Sweetie looked up at me. "Twilight scanned everypony on the train afterward, too. Not a single changeling anywhere."

"Let's head back into town," said Twilight. "Candy, can you come by the castle this afternoon and tell me what happened with Cherry?"

I nodded. "Sure. I'll need my shield spell renewed anyway."

"It should have another day or two of charge left on it."

I ran a hoof through my mane. "Uh, well, that's part of what happened. Cherry tapped into its energy to talk to me in my dream."

Twilight's pupils shrank slightly. "Really? I didn't know she could do that. Did she tell you how she--?"

"Perhaps it would be best to renew her spell now, darling," said Rarity. "Just to be safe."

"That's a good idea." Twilight's horn lighted. "Candy? Stand still, please."

As Twilight applied her magic to my pendant, Rarity turned to me. "I thought we'd head back to the boutique first for some lunch. I'm rather famished after our escapades."

I felt the familiar tingle pass over me just before Twilight lifted her head and said, "There."

"Thanks," I said.

"Come along, Candy, Sweetie," said Rarity.

I fell into step alongside Rarity, Sweetie Belle trotting alongside me. "I, um, heard about the incident at the Gala," I said.

Rarity frowned. "Worst. Gala. Ever. Do you know how well green ooze comes out of chiffon?"

"Um, well ..."

"It doesn't. And I won't even begin to describe the sheer embarrassment of having my dress taken off in front of everypony! Add being a pervert to the list of Discord's crimes."

I raised an eyebrow. "But, wait ... if we all don't wear anything ... um ... then why ... uh ..."

"Yes, dear?"

I shook my head. "You know what? Not important. Maybe it was good I didn't attend after all."

"I did miss you, Candy," said Sweetie Belle. "Did you miss me?"

I glanced down and smiled. "Of course I missed you. I'm very glad you got back safe."

"I'm looking forward to spending more time with you."

"So am I."

She smiled, and I felt better. At least it was one less thing to worry about now.

I tried not to appear impatient as Twilight took on a thoughtful look at the conclusion of my tale. All I had left out was the part about wanting to get Michelle a new body. She slowly paced the length of her library, her hooves echoing in the uneasy silence. Spike fidgeted as he glanced between Twilight and me.

I finally had to prompt her. "Twilight, you don't really think this stuff about Zecora's potion causing a problem is true, do you?"

Twilight stopped and turned towards me. She uttered a soft sigh. "Starswirl may indeed be right. He may know something we don't."

My heart sank. "But it doesn't make any sense! Wouldn't Zecora have said something by now?"

"I haven't seen her since you took the potion. In her efforts to refine it, she may have indeed found a problem."

I stomped a hoof. "I don't believe this! What about how Starswirl kept Princess Luna out of my dream? Or the way he broke it off just when she wanted to talk to him? That's not the least bit suspicious? You don't think he's hiding something?"

"There could be a, um, perfectly reasonable explanation for that!" said Spike. "Right, Twilight?"

Twilight stepped up to me. "Right, Spike." Her horn glowed, and my pendant levitated from my chest. "Keeping Princess Luna out was likely an honest mistake. Breaking off the dream may have been just some bit of magical interference. We honestly don't know enough to think otherwise."

I had no words. I simply stared in open-mouthed shock. I had expected some resistance from Twilight due to her fanfilly devotion to Starswirl, but not a complete dismissal.

"I'm sorry, Candy, I know this is hard for you to--"

"No, this is stupid!" I tried to back away, but the pendant remained firmly in Twilight's grip. My eyes widened. "Wait, what are you--?"

"Hey, Twilight!" Spike suddenly shouted over me. "Maybe you should be careful with that thing! You don't want to break it!"

"Huh?? But ... um ..."

I trailed off when I saw Twilight give me an urgent look and shake her head once. "I doubt I could break it just by handling it, but I do think I should cast a spell on it that will check it for any damage that Zecora's potion might have caused. It will take a while to complete."

I held my tongue only by sheer application of will. I bit my lower lip when a sphere of energy suddenly enveloped my pendant.

Twilight uttered what sounded like a sigh of relief as the pendant dropped back into place. "There. Now we can talk without being overheard. I already suspected that Starswirl and Cherry were aware of their surroundings outside the pendant, so when you just confirmed it, Candy, I was prepared."

I stared at her in both shock and at least a small amount of awe.

"And as much as I hate to admit it, I think you're right," said Twilight. "The avatar of Starswirl is hiding something."

"So no way he really could've made a mistake with Princess Luna?" Spike asked.

"Not a chance, Spike. At the time the pendant was created, Princess Luna had started her dream-walking duties. If the avatar has all Starswirl's memories of that time, it would know that. He could've easily allowed the Princess into the dream while keeping out other influences."

I ran a trembling hoof through my mane. "You really had me going there for a minute."

"Sorry we had to do that, Candy," said Spike.

"Honestly, I don't think the avatar will be fooled by this ruse for long," said Twilight. "But I had to do something."

I swallowed hard. "Twilight ... y-you don't think Cherry is in danger, do you?"

"The avatar hasn't done anything overtly hostile, so I'm hoping not."

"What about what Cherry said about Zecora's potion?"

"That makes no sense to me at all," said Twilight. "If that had caused a problem, either Zecora or I would've sensed it. I still intend to help Cherry manifest on her own. If anything, it's critical in helping me understand the pendant."

My heart thumped. "I-I want to use that potion again, Twilight. Please."

"I'm willing to talk to Zecora about it," said Twilight. "But it does risk upsetting Starswirl's avatar."

It had not been lost on me that Twilight had stopped referring to the entity strictly as Starswirl. "I don't care, Twilight. Maybe in that setting she'll have trouble keeping things from me."

"What do you mean?" Spike asked. "I thought it was the avatar doing that."

I hesitated. Michelle's warning to me echoed in my head: you'll only be disappointed. "It, um, had to do with something else Cherry and I talked about. I ... I want to get her out of that pendant. I want her to have a new body."

An uneasy silence fell, and I could hear my own heart beating. Spike fidgeted again and glanced at Twilight, who gave me a sad look.

"It can be done, right?" I said, though my heart was already sinking.

"Candy, I ..." Twilight started in a soft voice. "I ... I wish I could."

"Why can't you?"

Twilight stepped over to the table where the pile of old books lay. "What you're asking me to do is create life." The books glowed, and she plucked one from near the center of the pile. "I don't think even Starswirl ever intended that."

I took a deep breath when my vision blurred with tears. I wiped them with the back of a hoof and gritted my teeth until the urge to cry had passed. "Maybe he did. Maybe that was his intent all along, and you can finish it. Just like you completed that spell."

Twilight turned towards me, levitating the book before her. "Candy, this is a journal of one of Starswirl's friends, one that I hope will give me some insight. He passed on during Starswirl's lifetime. It's the same for many of these. He lived a long time and lost a lot of friends to old age or circumstance."

"So?" I snapped.

"So he was no stranger to losing somepony close to him. Even he understood there are some things not even magic can change."

I didn't want to hear this. I didn't want to believe Michelle was right. Why give her the chance of continuing on and deny her a proper life? Had Starswirl's motivations been cruel all along? Had he taken Michelle's spirit into the pendant just for his own amusement? Or, worse, to conduct some sort of monstrous experiment?

And now here I was treating the damn avatar as if it were the real thing.

I shook my head. "No. I don't believe this."

Twilight sighed. "Candy, please, I don't think you understand the limitations of--"

"And I don't think you understand what's going on!" I shouted. "You know what Cherry said to me? She said don't let Twilight pursue that. She didn't say not to tell you about it, or not to ask you about it, she said not to let you do it! Like I was supposed to stop you from doing it!"

Twilight hesitated. "But if Starswirl had already told her that it was impossible--"

"She never said that." I sighed. "Fine. Keep thinking it's impossible. But Cherry was hiding something from me. I know her, Twilight. She's never ever been this elusive with me. She's ... she's afraid of something, something she thinks you'll find out."

Logic could not support me here. I had little more than my own feeble intuition. I could avail myself of no facts or figures, nor could I even describe this as "reasoning" in even the broadest sense of the word. I had only what my heart told me.

Twilight lowered the book slightly and stared at it. Her eyes took on a distant look, and she ruffled her wings. She put the book aside and stepped up to me. "All right, you've made your point."

Spike gasped. "T-Twilight ... you're not ... y-you're not really going to try to--!"

"No, Spike," said Twilight firmly. "I still maintain it can't be done, but ... but let me assume for now that this is what Starswirl had intended. Maybe it will help me unravel this mystery. I'll talk to Zecora as well."

This was not the complete victory I had wanted, but it was more than I had feared I would get. Perhaps I hoped that her own curiosity would take hold, and she would come through for me, and for Michelle. "Twilight, thank you."

"Please don't get your hopes up, Candy," said Twilight. "Even if I do find evidence that this was Starswirl's intent, it may well have been a dead end."

I didn't want to believe that, but I nodded just the same.

Twilight's horn glowed. "I'm going to remove the spell from your pendant. Let's continue as if I had convinced you to go along with what Cherry told you."

"I do intend to honor her request about me listening to what this changeling of Matilda's has to say," I said.

Twilight smiled faintly before she lowered her head. The shield around my pendant dissipated with a soft pop. "Good news, Candy. It looks like no damage was incurred to the pendant."

I took a quick, deep breath. "Thanks. And, um, thanks for explaining stuff to me. I guess we'll do what Cherry wants."

"Was there anything else you wanted to talk about?" Twilight asked.

"Well, not about the pendant. What exactly happened on the train?"

"I'm not quite sure yet," said Twilight. "Whatever that creature was, it was highly resistant to magic. I doubt I did more than ruffle its fur."

My eyes widened. "Is that even possible?"

"Ponies have yet to explore the entire world. There are many lands we know little about. It's possible this bugbear had to adapt to magic-based hazards or predators." She paused. "And magic is not an all-powerful, do-everything force."

"Yeah, even when Twilight had to deal with an Ursa Minor, she had to be clever about it," said Spike. "I mean, she wasn't an alicorn back then, but still."

So was that as much managing my expectations as answering my question? "And no idea yet if it had anything to do with changelings?"

"Seems kinda weird to arrange for the diversion and then don't do anything," Spike said.

"Especially considering Discord's hint," said Twilight.

"So you're really buying into what he said?" I asked.

"The hints he gave us earlier about you proved to be correct, if in his roundabout way. So please let me know if anypony attempts to lure you outside of Ponyville for any reason."

"I will," I said. "I promise."

"Meanwhile, I'm going to look over the wards again," said Twilight in a tired voice. "I want to make absolutely sure Sevfivtoo can't come anywhere near this town. Like I told Applejack, I don't want to take any chances. Spike, this might take a bit. Please don't delay your dinner if I'm late."

Twilight's horn glowed, and she vanished in a pop of teleportation magic.

"Heya, Candy, wait up!"

I stopped and turned my head. "Heya, girls," I said, smiling as Apple Bloom and Scootaloo trotted over to me after I had left the castle. "What's up?"

"Well, we were gonna round ya up fer a meetin' of the Crusaders," Apple Bloom said.

"Yeah, but Sweetie Belle said she didn't want to go," said Scootaloo.

I tilted my head. "Wait, I thought all you girls were still grounded for another week or so."

Apple Bloom smiled and waved a hoof. "Naw, Applejack an' the rest felt bad that our first Gala kinda got ruined, so they let us off the hook."

Scootaloo fluttered her wings, her hooves leaving the ground for a second. "I actually thought it was the best Gala ever!"

"Dang right! Even the train ride back was excitin'!"

"The whole thing with the Smooze sorta did ruin our chances at a ballroom dancing cutie mark, though."

That had to be their safest of attempts yet. Knowing them, though, they would find a way to make it dangerous. "So why didn't Sweetie Belle want to join you?"

"She said she wanted ta spend more time with ya," said Apple Bloom.

Scootaloo made a face. "You two going to do sappy sister stuff together?"

"Hey, ain't nothin' sappy about doin' stuff with yer sister," Apple Bloom said proudly.

"I meant like curling each other's manes and hooficures and all that."

"Oh, yeah, that is kinda sappy, ain't it?"

I wanted to feel flattered that Sweetie Belle chose me over her friends, but a renewed sense of unease crept over me. Should I head home right away and stay with her to ensure she remained safe? Or should I convince her to go with us to the Crusader clubhouse where we'd have strength in numbers in case something happened? Where was I supposed to draw the line between genuine concern and paranoia?

My mind returned full circle to Discord's "clues" that Twilight was taking seriously. Yet did that include Discord's comment about Tree Hugger? Or was I wrong to relate it to my conversation with Miss Cheerilee? Princess Luna had supposedly dispelled that concern, but something still bothered me about it.

"Anyway, we're sorta looking for something to do," Scootaloo said.

"Um, girls?" I said. "Would you happen to know where Miss Cheerilee lives?"

"Well, sure," Apple Bloom said. "It's not real far from the schoolhouse."

"Can you take me to see her?"

"Oh, she's still in Fillydelphia," said Scootaloo.

"No, she ain't," said Apple Bloom. "She's right here in town."

My eyes widened. "Wait, you saw her?"

"But I thought she said she was visiting relatives," said Scootaloo.

"Granny said she saw Miss Cheerilee in the marketplace a few days ago," said Apple Bloom.

"Did Granny talk to her?" I asked.

"Tried ta, but Miss Cheerilee was sneezin' up a storm an' lookin' a little under the weather."

"Aw, I hope she's not sick," Scootaloo said.

"If she is, we can go cheer her up!" Apple Bloom said.

My stomach clenched. "Yes, let's do that. Right now."

"Sure thing! Come on, Crusaders!"

Sometimes being a teenager was like being bad at archery: the actions are sharp and quick, but often miss the target. Thus we were halfway to Cheerilee's house when I realized I had led the Crusaders on another potential changeling hunt. Apparently my new-found resolve had nudged some of my intelligence aside. At least I realized this before it had completely leaked out my ears.

"Why are we stoppin' here, Candy?" Apple Bloom said as we stood some half-dozen or so houses from Cheerilee's place.

"Um, well, I thought if she really was sick, maybe you and Scootaloo don't want to catch what she's got."

"She's got a point," Scootaloo said.

"Yeah, but how're we gonna cheer her up if we're way back here?" asked Apple Bloom.

"Maybe I should just go on ahead and check on her," I said.

"But then you'll get sick, won't ya?"

I seriously considered concocting a story that I had some sort of alien super-immunity that protected me from their germs, but I doubted they would buy something so far-fetched.

"Hey, wait, I got an idea," Scootaloo said. "Why don't we head over to the hospital and see if they'll give us some of those masks and stuff that the doctors use?"

"Great idea, Scootaloo!" Apple Bloom said. "Come on, Candy, we'll jus'--"

"I think I'm going to stay here and wait for you," I said. "I'm, uh, kinda tired and don't want to do a whole lot more trotting."

"No problem! We'll be right back."

I watched the two fillies gallop back the way we had come until they were out of sight. My heart pounded as I stepped up to the house: a quaint little thatched-roof abode with heart-shaped windows and smiley-faces on the front door similar to her cutie mark. I rapped my fore-hoof gently on the door and took a step back. Nopony answered. I tried again, but still nothing. I glanced at the windows; they all appeared dark.

"I don't think she's going to answer."

I stumbled off the front deck at the sound of the voice from just above and off to the side.

A gray pegasus mare with a pale yellow mane and oddly skewed eyes landed next to me, saddlebags draped around her barrel. She blinked rapidly, and her eyes uncrossed. "Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you."

I forced a small smile. "It's okay. But, uh, what did you mean about Miss Cheerilee not answering? Isn't she home?"

The pegasus grabbed several letters in her teeth from her bag and poked them through the slot in the door before turning to me, her eyes having gone wonky again. "She's home, but she's probably asleep in bed. Poor thing."

My stomach churned. "Wh-what happened to her?"

"She got sick in Fillydelphia and came home early. She's got a nasty case of pony pox."

I had no idea what that was, but if she wasn't in the hospital, it likely wasn't much worse than flu or chicken pox. Still, they had knocked me flat when I had them as a kid. "Princess Luna had said her dreams were disturbed."

The mare gasped, blinking and shaking her head, pupils shrinking in her now straightened eyes. "Wow, you talked to Princess Luna? Like, outside of a dream? That's really cool. How did you manage to get an audience with her?"

"Er, well, it's a long story ... um, can you tell me when she came down with the pony pox?"

The pegasus looked thoughtful, or at least I guessed she did, since her eyes had skewed again. "Had to be at least two or three days ago. I had the pony pox once. I felt absolutely awful for almost two weeks."

"So there's no way she could've been up and about yesterday?"

"Oh, no, not at all. Have you never had pony pox?"

"Um, no, never."

"You're lucky. Only feather flu is worse." The pegasus shook her head and uncrossed her eyes. "Are you okay? You look kinda pale yourself."

Oh, don't mind me, I just learned that the pony claiming to be Sweetie Belle's teacher was the monster that murdered my friend.

Or was it really Sevfivtoo? How could it have gotten past Twilight's wards? What the hell was its game? Why talk to me about the Crusaders? Or give their parents and siblings advice? Should I go straight home and check that Sweetie Belle was okay, or did the changeling want us together for some nefarious reason?

"I'm fine," I lied. "Thank you for the help."

The pegasus smiled. "Of course."

I galloped away from the house and tried to guess the most likely path the Crusaders would take to and from the hospital. I spotted them near the marketplace and gestured towards them with a hoof. "Girls! Over here!"

They cantered over to me. "What are you doing over here?" Scootaloo asked.

"Aw, it don't matter," Apple Bloom said, her ears drooping. "The hospital won't give us nothin' anyway."

"I found out Miss Cheerilee has pony pox," I said.

They gasped. "Oh, no, that's awful!" Scootaloo cried.

"What are we gonna do now?" Apple Bloom said. "She must be feelin' real bad."

My mind raced. "Um ... how about ... making a get-well card for her?"

"That's a great idea!" Scootaloo said.

"Oh, but we need Sweetie Belle fer that," said Apple Bloom. "She's real good with her magic now, an' she's got a great eye fer detail."

"I'll take care of convincing her to come along," I said as I turned away. "We'll meet you at the clubhouse."

Despite all the precautions and protections, despite how clear the threat seemed, I felt hideously exposed, and I could not place why. I desperately needed a new perspective.

Jump to top

Chapter 33 - Deception Revealed

At the boutique, Rarity was in the kitchen. This did not become notable until I heard an odd noise from within. I peeked around the corner to see a broom and dustpan glowing in Rarity's magic, shards of glass glittering in the light.

"There you are, Candy," said Rarity. "You were gone for quite a while."

"Um, yeah, some other stuff came up." I glanced down as Rarity swept up more shards. "What happened?"

"Just a minor accident. Sweetie Belle lost her grip on a large jar I asked her to fetch from the fridge. Nopony was hurt." She looked at me. "Everything okay?"

I debated how much to tell her. Until I knew what sort of danger followed me -- or for that matter, that I carried around in the form of an eavesdropping pendant -- I didn't want to endanger Rarity as well.

No, keeping this from her was stupid. She was my fosterer. She was my mother for all intents and purposes, regardless of whether I could address her as such. "I, uh, just found out that Miss Cheerilee is sick. Pony pox."

Rarity sighed. "The poor thing. Pony pox is not particularly dangerous, but it makes one feel awful." Her pupils shrank slightly. "Oh, dear, I hope I don't come down with it. I just talked to her a few days ago. And you spoke to her ... ah ..."

"Right before the Gala," I said.

Rarity frowned. She dumped the contents of the dustpan in the garbage bin and trotted over to me. "Candy, are you sure of this?"

"As sure as I can be."

"Because a pony doesn't come down with such an ailment overnight. Did she show any sign of being sick when you spoke to her?"

"None whatsoever. In fact, she was supposedly too sick to be up and about that day." I ran a hoof through my mane. "The Crusaders want to make her a get-well card. They're at the clubhouse now. I thought I'd bring Sweetie Belle over."

"I have half a mind to tell you 'no' until I know what's going on," said Rarity.

That's what I had been afraid of. "I know, but I thought ... I thought I might talk to Applejack about this. She sounded like she's already suspicious that something's going on, and her farm would be the safest place for both me and Sweetie Belle right now."

Despite all words of reassurance and my own efforts, twinges of guilt over my mother's death still assailed me. By no stretch of the imagination was Rarity helpless, nor was this situation at all the same, but logic did not always prevail in my addled teenage brain.

I just didn't want anypony I loved to be hurt.

"All right," Rarity said in a low voice. "But I'm coming with you."

I let out a relieved sigh. "I'll go fetch Sweetie Belle."

I ascended the stairs as fast as I could. I had set only a single hoof in Sweetie's room when she bolted to me and drew me into a tight hug. "You were gone for a long while, Candy. Is everything okay?"

No, nothing was okay, and I would have preferred to keep this from Sweetie Belle, but she was as smart as her older sister. "I just learned that Miss Cheerilee is sick."

Her pupils shrank. "She is?"

"Yeah. Pony pox."

"That's terrible. She must be feeling really bad."

I tilted my head. "Well, yeah. Your friends want to make her a get-well card."

Sweetie Belle smiled. "That's really nice."

"I told them we'd meet them at the clubhouse."

"Oh, You mean right now?" Sweetie asked. "I did kinda want to spend time with you today."

"We will, but with our other friends, too." I smiled. "I promise, tomorrow we'll spend as much time together as we can, just the two of us."

Sweetie nodded. "Okay, Candy. Thanks. You're right, we really ought to do something for Miss Cheerilee."

I broke off the embrace. "You better get your art stuff together."

"Okay." Sweetie Belle glanced around her room. "Um ... I need to use the little filly's room first, so I'll meet you out front."

I nodded. "Sure thing."

My gaze lingered on her for a moment before I turned away. I thought for sure she would have made the connection. Or maybe she had, and she didn't want to show me her worry or fear. That was very sweet, if misplaced. She should have known by then that I would never judge her for that.

"I don't like this one bit, Applejack," said Rarity as I trotted over to them just within sight of the Crusaders' tree house.

Applejack frowned. "Join the club." She turned to me. "You okay there, sugarcube?"

"I got the Crusaders working on the get-well card," I said. "I told them I had to use the bathroom. I, uh, didn't want to miss this."

"Are they safe by themselves?" Rarity asked.

"Big Mac's around doin' some apple-buckin'," said Applejack. "Anypony who even thinks of harmin' them is gonna get the wrong end of his back hooves."

"That's all well and good so long as it's not a changeling disguised as one of us!"

"But how did it get in?" I said, as if still hoping for some other explanation. "Twilight's wards were supposed to keep it out."

"Unless it was already in town when they went up," said Rarity.

"I don't think that's it," said Applejack. "'cuz I'll bet the whole dang farm that it was Sevfivtoo who set that critter on us on the train. Even a changelin' can't be in two places at once."

"But why?" Rarity said. "There was no point to the attack. Maybe it had nothing to do with this sordid mess."

"I still don't buy that. An' yer all missin' somethin' mighty important here. Twilight didn't say those wards would keep any changelin' out. She said it would keep Sevfivtoo out."

My stomach clenched as I recalled when Twilight first set the shield spell on me ...

~~~

"These spells really are more of a precaution than anything else," said Twilight. "It's unlikely that Sevfivtoo will get close to you even if she does attempt to enter Ponyville."

"Why's that?"

"I've placed wards around the periphery of Ponyville to detect the approach of strong magical beings. It can't detect ordinary drones, but a changeling of Sevfivtoo's ability will stand out easily, regardless of what illusions she can cast."

~~~

Rarity gasped. "Are you saying there's another changeling about? Do you mean Matilda's friend Kevin?"

"He's not s'posed ta be in Ponyville yet," said Applejack. "Don't get me wrong. I don't trust 'im even half as far as I could buck 'im, but Twilight ain't stupid. She told me she found out from Matilda where that changelin' was hidin' out an' got ponies ta watch 'im."

I wished she had told me that! I would not have freaked out about it quite as much.

"But that leads us back to square one," said Rarity.

"Not quite." Applejack turned to me. "Twilight filled me in about yer meetin' with yer friend. Didn't Cherry say Sevfivtoo had a companion?"

I paused to recall that detail. "Um, yeah, she did. Wun-something-or-other."

"Wuntusix, I believe was its name," said Rarity.

"But Twilight thought it went back with Chrysalis and left Sevfivtoo behind," I said. "And Cherry just barely mentioned it, like it didn't matter."

"Mebbe she honestly didn't think it did," said Applejack. "But I'm not so sure."

"Surely Twilight has considered this," Rarity said.

"I said Twilight ain't stupid, but she ain't perfect, either. An' she's been runnin' herself ragged. She might not be seein' the forest fer the trees."

I remembered how Twilight had sounded tired just before she teleported away to check the wards. I had not thought anything of it.

"She does tend to get rather focused on one aspect of a problem," said Rarity.

I had unwittingly compounded it by trying to set her on a new task concerning a body for Michelle, but I had no intention of backing down. "So what do we do now?"

"I think we gotta assume there's a changelin' in Ponyville right now," Applejack said. "Ya had the right idea in gettin' the Crusaders together, Candy. Fer all their faults, they sure as hay know how ta watch each other's backs."

I managed a small smile. I liked hearing that I had actually done something right. "Should I tell them what's going on?"

Rarity rolled her eyes. "So long as we don't have a repeat of their escapade in the White Tail Woods."

"I won't let that happen," I declared.

Rarity smiled. "I know you won't, dear. I trust you to do the right thing."

"An' I trust ya, too, Candy," said Applejack. "Go tell 'em that there's a changelin' on the loose, an' that they need ta be dang careful 'bout the company they keep. Mebbe jus' keep 'em distracted with that card fer Miss Cheerilee."

"Somepony should check on her," Rarity said. "Just to make sure she's safe."

"Who told ya about her illness, Candy?" Applejack asked.

"I didn't get her name," I said. "She's a mailpony. Um, gray-coated pegasus, yellow mane, bubbles for a cutie mark, had kind of wonky eyes."

Rarity sighed. "Yes, definitely double-check."

Applejack smiled. "At least Derpy's heart is in the right place. Rarity, why don't ya see what ya can find out about Miss Cheerilee? Meanwhile, I'll go talk ta Twilight."

"Are you going to try to convince her to keep Kevin away from Ponyville?" asked Rarity.

"I'm gonna trust Twilight on that, 'specially since the Princesses seem ta wanna hear what he has ta say."

"I think we all should be present for this little meeting just in case."

"Sounds like a great idea ta me."

I certainly thought so. I had already grudgingly accepted that I would meet this changeling face-to-face, but that didn't mean I had to feel vulnerable in its presence. "I think I should get back to the Crusaders."

"Yes, please do," said Rarity. "Don't let them out of your sight until we get back."

Applejack stepped up to me. "An' one more thing. Keep yer wits about ya. Take note of everythin' ya see or hear. Don't take nothin' fer granted."

"I'll try, Applejack." I paused. "Um ... Sweetie Belle said Twilight scanned everypony on the train afterward. That's true, right?"

"Yep. That was one of the first things she did when that monster was gone, since it took us so long ta drive it off."

"Nearly a full hour," Rarity muttered. "With all that smoke and steam from the engine, it's a wonder my coiffure survived intact."

I hid a grin behind my hoof. Applejack outright smirked. "I'd pay bits ta see yer mane get mussed up fer once."

"Hmph. You would. I suppose the Gala didn't count."

"Naw. Green ain't yer color."

One corner of Rarity's mouth rose. "And you realized that on your own? Perhaps I'll make a fashion-conscious pony of you yet."

Applejack's pupils shrank. "Tarnation, I hope not!"

I giggled. "I better get back to the Crusaders. I'll see you later."

What had once been just another oddity of this world I now drew on for support: their ability to maintain their good humor even in dire circumstances. It helped me feel a little more sane.

Apple Bloom's pupils shrank to points. "A changelin'?? Right here in Ponyville?!"

Sweetie Belle shivered slightly. She had snuggled up to me almost as soon as we had arrived. I really wished she would confess to how scared she was. If anyone knew how worse off somepony could be by keeping things to herself, it would be me.

"How did it get in?!" Scootaloo cried.

"It wasn't supposed to be able to," said Sweetie. "Twilight's magic was supposed to keep it out."

"Who cares how it got in?" cried Apple Bloom. "The important thing is, where is it now?"

"Look, I don't think it's near us right now," I said. Or at least I hoped. "There's nothing to worry about."

Apple Bloom jumped forward, her hooves clopping against the wood floor of the tree house near the edge of their interrupted art project. "There's plenty ta worry about, Candy! It could be anywhere!"

"It could look like anypony!" Scootaloo said.

"It could be doin' anythin'!"

"It could be planning anything!"

"Yes, I know," I said, impatience creeping into my voice. "But you don't need to panic, not when--"

"Where are we gonna look first?" Apple Bloom said.

Scootaloo fluttered her wings. "Oh, I know! The marketplace!"

I blinked. "Wait, what??"

"Good thinkin', Scootaloo!" said Apple Bloom. "It has lotsa ponies it could look like there."

"Where did we put the net?" Scootaloo said, looking around.

Apple Bloom trotted over to her saddlebags. "An' the mallet! Don't ferget that!"

"You still got that thing you didn't know what it was but looked really useful?"

"Um, not sure. I think it rolled under the table behind ya when--"

"Girls, stop!" I yelled. "We're not going to hunt the changeling!"

Both Apple Bloom and Scootaloo's ears drooped. "We're not?" they said in unison.

"No, we're not. Period. End of sentence."

Sweetie Belle pressed herself a little more firmly against my side. "Maybe we should listen to her. Going after a changeling sounds kinda dangerous."

I wrapped a foreleg around her without taking my eyes off the others. "Maybe you've forgotten that changelings are willing to kill! Really, girls, there are a lot safer ways to earn your cutie marks."

Apple Bloom's gaze shifted. "Umm ... who said this hasta do with our cutie marks?"

Scootaloo gave her an odd look. "But I thought you were saying the other day you still wanted to get a cutie mark for -- ouch!" Apple Bloom had kicked her lightly in the side with a single hoof. "Er, I mean ... right! Nothing to do with cutie marks."

Sweetie Belle frowned. "Apple Bloom? Scootaloo? Not helping."

I smirked. "And you're both terrible liars."

Apple Bloom sighed and plopped herself down on her haunches. "Aw, dang it. I'm sorry, Candy. Yer right. I jus' feel like we're real close to gettin' 'em."

I glanced down at their incomplete art creation and smiled. "Well, maybe you are. Can't you get it in, um, get-well-card-making?"

That sounded far-fetched even to me, but just maybe it would distract them long enough to forget about changeling-hunting for awhile.

Scootaloo stepped up to the edge of their project. "Well, it is starting to look nice."

Their "card" looked larger than the pony it was intended for. The backing was a heart-shaped piece of red construction paper, a layer of white with a lacy edge atop that, and a crude but serviceable drawing of Miss Cheerilee in the center swaddled by blankets and a box of tissues at her side. They had started to color it in, though the first attempts had a few ragged trails outside the lines.

"We're gonna put 'Get Well Soon' at the bottom and sign it with our hoof-prints!" Apple Bloom said with a smile. "We could use yer help, though, Candy."

"Sweetie Belle's having some trouble with the coloring," said Scootaloo.

I glanced down at Sweetie. "You okay?"

She smiled at me. "Oh, yeah, I'm fine. Just a little tired."

That would explain why she had dropped the jar earlier. The first thing I learned in magic training was that fatigue could affect energy flow. Exhaustion made my magic wobbly, and I had dropped things as well. While Sweetie had a lot of energy most of the time, she just had a traumatic experience on the train. Everypony had their limits.

"I started to do her mane," Sweetie said. "Do you want to finish it?"

I smiled and held her a little tighter. I grabbed a pink crayon in my magic.

"I'll go get the glitter fer the trim," said Apple Bloom as she stepped away.

"We're still kind of disappointed that we didn't get to help the others fight the monster," said Scootaloo. "So I guess that's why we got a little carried away about the changeling."

I applied the crayon to the drawing. "You girls did the right thing by hanging back."

Apple Bloom returned with a bottle in her teeth which she dropped at her hooves. "Ta be honest, more I think 'bout it, more I'm sure we never woulda got there in time."

"Yeah, we were way back in the last car," said Scootaloo.

I stopped coloring. "The last car?"

"We didn't know yet that our groundin' was canceled," said Apple Bloom. "So we wanted ta have a meetin' of the Crusaders, an' nopony was usin' that one."

"You were alone?"

Scootaloo rolled her eyes. "We tried."

"Lyra Heartstrings was with us," said Sweetie Belle.

I glanced down at her. "The whole time?"

"Yeah."

"Well, at least from just before the train stopped," said Scootaloo.

"She rushed in sayin' she thought she saw somethin' outside," said Apple Bloom. "Then the train stopped."

My heart fluttered. "What did she see?"

"Just the bugbear," said Sweetie Belle. "It passed by the car. Then the train stopped soon after that."

"Yeah, that's right," Apple Bloom said, nodding slowly.

"I had forgotten about that," Scootaloo said. "But things happened kinda fast. I remember that now."

"It went right by the windows and headed towards the engine just before she came in," Sweetie said. She shivered slightly. "I ... it kinda scared me."

"Is that why ya were nervous 'bout goin' ta fight it?" asked Apple Bloom.

"I didn't want you to know," Sweetie Belle said in a soft voice. "I was embarrassed about how much it frightened me."

I gave Sweetie Belle a gentle squeeze despite my own rising anxiety. At least she finally admitted how she felt.

Scootaloo rolled her eyes. "Not that Miss Heartstrings would let us leave anyway."

Sweetie looked up at me. "I really don't want us going after that changeling, either. I guess I'm a little more scared of it, now, too."

"Aw, I'm sorry, Sweetie Belle," Apple Bloom said. "I woulda never suggested goin' after it if I knew ya felt that way."

"You were just so enthusiastic about it the first time," Scootaloo said.

Sweetie Belle smiled faintly. "I know, but ... I just want to be safe right now."

"I think that's a great idea," I said in as steady a voice I could muster.

My mind raced. Applejack's words echoed in my head: Keep yer wits about ya. Take note of everythin' ya see or hear. Don't take nothin' fer granted.

But wasn't this all said and done? Twilight had scanned everypony. Applejack had confirmed that. Everypony was safe. Yet despite all efforts, a changeling was loose in Ponyville. A grand chess game played out before me, yet I couldn't see all the pieces. Like the chronicle of events from the Crusaders: it sounded right, it sounded logical, it fit with everything I had been told.

And yet a new piece had been introduced: Lyra.

~~~

"And I am the real Lyra this time."

"Oh, sorry."

"It's okay, Candy," she said with a sigh. "You're not the first pony I've had to say that to."

~~~

But ... no, that was weeks ago! Yes, a changeling had taken her place briefly but they had found the real Lyra, or so I had been told. She would have been scanned along with everypony else on the train.

Unless Sevfivtoo found a way around that, like she had when she circumvented Twilight's mind magick detection spells at the castle.

Something else didn't make sense, a detail that sat in the back of my mind, but that I couldn't grasp. Something that didn't fit. Something that--

"We should get back ta this," said Apple Bloom.

"Yeah, we don't have a lot more time before dinner," said Scootaloo.

That was it. Time.

~~~

"They weren't even gone very long," said Scootaloo.

"Felt like a while to me," said Rainbow Dash. "But time seems to slow down when I'm being awesome."

~~~

"Girls?" I said in a slightly quavering voice. "One more question: how much time passed from when the train stopped and Twilight and the others came to check on you?"

"Hmm, I dunno," Apple Bloom said. "Wasn't long, I don't think. Half hour, mebbe?"

"Oh, no, way shorter than that," said Scootaloo. "Fifteen minutes, tops."

"I'm sure it was longer than that, Scootaloo."

"I'm not really sure myself," said Sweetie Belle. "After Miss Heartstrings had arrived, things got kind of weird anyway."

"Rarity had said it was almost an hour," I declared.

Apple Bloom looked confused. "Huh, really? Didn't seem that long. But she was doin' the fightin' with the others, so I guess she must be right."

"Maybe it just seemed shorter," Scootaloo said.

"It must've been the excitement," said Sweetie Belle.

Or somepony casting a spell that messed with their heads. Like a unicorn pony. Or a changeling. Or both.

Or ... it could be what it seemed. Lyra had entered the car when she saw the bugbear go past the window, and the combination of fear and excitement messed with their perception of time. She kept them there not for some sinister purpose, but for their safety. With the monster at the head of the train, the rearmost car was the safest place to be.

Either way, I wasn't going to sit on this information, but the last thing I needed was the Crusaders thinking Lyra was a changeling. I couldn't trust them not to take matters into their own hooves.

Except, possibly, for Sweetie Belle. She was acting the most responsible of all. Considering she was likely in the greatest amount of danger, this suited me just fine.

"Is dinner not to your liking, Candy?" said Rarity.

I flinched and stared at her. "Huh?" I glanced down at my plate. "Oh."

"You've barely finished half your dinner."

"I, uh, just have stuff on my mind, that's all," I said.

Rarity gave me a serious look. "Anything you wish to discuss with me?"

I glanced at Sweetie Belle, who gave me a warm smile. I smiled weakly in return. "Yes, actually, but, um, it can wait until after dinner."

Why I felt the need to hide this from Sweetie when I had just extolled her responsible nature eluded me. Perhaps it simply stemmed from my desire to protect her.

Rarity nodded. "Very well. Perhaps some good news will make you feel better. I verified what you had learned earlier. Miss Cheerilee has indeed taken ill with pony pox but is otherwise fine."

"Oh, good," I said. "I mean, not good that she's sick, but--"

"Why did you have to check on her?" Sweetie asked.

Rarity smiled gently at her. "I assume Candy told you and your friends about the changeling threat?"

"Yeah, she told us all about that."

"Well, since Miss Cheerilee is confined to her house, this was to ensure it didn't take advantage of her incapacity."

Sweetie Belle nodded. "I get it. That's good to hear, then."

"Did you get a chance to finish your get-well card?" said Rarity. "I can have it delivered for you when you finish it."

"Not yet," Sweetie said. "We'll have to go back to finish it tomorrow."

"I'm sure we can get that done fairly quickly," I said. "Then we can spend the rest of the day together."

Sweetie smiled. "I'd like that."

I looked at Rarity. "I'm not sure this can go through the regular mail. It's kinda big."

Rarity smiled. "No worries. I can have it delivered personally."

"But wouldn't that expose somepony to the illness?"

"Fortunately, Lyra has had this particular strain of the pox before, so she's immune."

My fork clattered to my plate. "Uh ... did you say Lyra? As in Lyra Heartstrings?"

"Yes, dear. She's the one you met a few weeks ago on your way home from the castle with the books Twilight gave you."

"Why Lyra?" I demanded.

Rarity looked a bit nonplussed at my tone. "She's the one who confirmed Miss Cheerilee's condition for me. She's been doing Miss Cheerilee's shopping while she's laid up."

My heart pounded. I glanced at Sweetie Belle. She had cleared her plate and was tipping her glass of juice back to get at the last few swallows.

Rarity tilted her head. "Candy, is something--?"

"We need to talk," I murmured. I lifted a hoof to hide my muzzle from Sweetie and mouthed the word "alone."

Rarity nodded once. "Sweetie, dear, if you're done, you can be excused."

Sweetie carefully set down her glass. "Okay. Candy, can you come by my room when you're done?"

"Sure, Sweetie." I watched her hop off her chair and trot out of the room.

"What is it, dear?" Rarity said in an urgent voice.

"The Crusaders told me Lyra was with them in the last car."

"Yes, that's right."

"Is there any chance at all that ... that Lyra could be a changeling?"

Rarity's pupils shrank to points. "My stars, whatever gave you that idea? Candy, if things were not already such a large mess, I would think you being a tad paranoid."

I thumped a fore-hoof on the table. "Look, maybe I am! Don't think that hasn't crossed my mind, too. Did you talk to Lyra on the train?"

"No, but I was there when Twilight spoke with her."

"Did she say she saw something fly past the window?"

Rarity paused. "Why ... yes, she did. That was why she went into the car."

"Did she say what she thought it was?"

"She said she couldn't tell," said Rarity. "It flew by too fast."

"The Crusaders told me they saw it, and that it was the bugbear," I said. "And that it was headed towards the front of the train."

"Well, that makes sense."

I face-hoofed. "No, it doesn't!"

Rarity frowned. "She was obviously concerned for their safety."

"For something that flew by so fast she couldn't identify it? Flying away from the car with the Crusaders? When there was no other indication of danger?"

"The train had stopped suddenly!" Rarity declared. "What more indication does one need?"

"But the Crusaders said she was in the car right before the train stopped!"

Rarity's mouth dropped open. "Wh-what?? That's not ... that's not what Lyra said."

Gotcha.

Gotcha, you monster.

I leaned forward and propped my head up on one fore-hoof. "Oh, really, now?"

Rarity's frown deepened. "Surely there must be some sort of logical explanation. Twilight scanned everypony, including Lyra. Including all her friends, even though we were right there with her the whole time."

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, it's not like Sevfivtoo ever got around Twilight's magic before."

Rarity sighed. "You've made your point. Very well. If you would be so kind as to clean up, I'll head out long enough to let Twilight know."

"Thank you," I said with a relieved sigh. I hopped off my chair and started levitating plates and silverware to the sink.

"Honestly, sometimes I wish we were fighting another Tirek. At least then one knew who the enemy was." Rarity trotted towards the door, paused, and turned. "Oh, and Candy?"

"Yes?"

"No banging your hooves on the table. It's bad manners."

I uttered a dramatic sigh, but I gave her a tiny smile. "Sorry."

I washed the dishes and set them to dry before heading upstairs. Sweetie Belle gave me a hug as soon as I stepped into her room. "I heard the front door," she said as she hopped up onto her bed. "Did Rarity go out?"

I sat next to her. "Yeah, but she'll be back soon."

"So you think Lyra is a changeling, huh?"

My moment of shock did not last long. I narrowed my eyes. "You were listening in on our conversation."

"Just a little. But it makes total sense."

"It does?"

Sweetie nodded. "I mean, she lied about when she entered the car, right?" she said in a slightly quavering voice.

"Well, that, and other stuff, too," I said. "You going to be okay?"

"I think so. Once Rarity tells Twilight, I'm sure she'll take care of it." Sweetie smiled and snuggled against me. "Besides, I have such a great sister who I know will protect me."

My eyes became misty, and a wide smile stretched across my muzzle. I wrapped my forelegs around her and hugged her tightly. I glanced towards the window as the sun sank below the horizon. "Do you want to go on to bed, Sweetie? You said you were tired earlier."

"Maybe in a little while," she said softly. "I'm feeling better now."

I had every intention of living up to her expectations of me. What befell Michelle -- and my original mother -- would never happen again to those I loved.

I would sooner die than let that happen again.

Jump to top

Chapter 34 - Fear

I tried not to fidget, but I could not stop my tail from swishing back and forth as Rarity stepped around the ponyquin, the slow clop of her hooves the only sound as she scrutinized my work. Upon the ponyquin sat an old dress one of her patrons had traded in for a new one, and Rarity had set me to work on it as if for an actual commission to spruce up the dress.

I finally had to speak. "I even tried to patch up a few holes. It was tricky but ..."

"Mm, yes, I noticed," Rarity murmured in that infuriatingly neutral tone that never gave me any indication what she was thinking.

"I got the fabric color as close as possible, but, um ..."

"Yes, indeed," said Rarity without looking up. "The original fabric was discontinued, and the dye process changed for its replacement. They say it's the same color, but to the trained eye, it's clearly not."

"So that's a problem here, too? Even with magic?"

"Unfortunately."

That problem often vexed my mother. As much as she enjoyed making new designs, she liked to churn out older, popular designs at a discount to keep sales up. She occasionally had to switch fabrics, and precisely matching the colors frustrated her. While customers rarely noticed, it mattered a great deal to her.

Rarity finally turned to face me, smiling. "Candy, this is excellent work."

I let out a sigh of relief. "Thank you."

"The gems you chose for the accents are just a touch garish, but your seamstress ability is solid. You have a good eye for delicate work. I almost couldn't see some of the stitches you used. And despite the fact that I generally don't advocate patch-work -- since it never quite comes out right as you learned -- it was a good exercise for you, and they came out as well as can be hoped for."

My smile widened. I didn't even mind the criticism concerning the gems, as she had no quibble with how I had attached them, which was what really mattered to me.

"Now, there's just one more thing." Rarity glanced about and frowned. "Oh, where is Sweetie Belle? I asked her to retrieve that box of lace ten minutes ago. Sweetie Belle!"

"I'm coming, I'm coming!" came a harried voice from just outside the room. Sweetie trotted into the room, her ears drooping as a box shuddered in her magical grip.

"You okay?" I asked.

Sweetie set down the box and fell to her haunches. "Yeah, just a little tired."

I smirked. "We seem to be trading that problem between us these last few days."

She smiled. "Um, yeah. Weird, huh?"

My sleep rhythms had been off a bit in a kind of weird reverse synchronization to hers. When she was perky, I was tired, and vice versa.

"Candy, you're just about at the point where I can have you doing simple alterations for our customers," said Rarity. "In fact, you did such a good job on this dress, I'm thinking of showing it to Bon Bon to cheer her up."

I tilted my head. "This is Bon Bon's dress? Um, isn't she Lyra's friend?"

I had not heard a word about Lyra since Rarity had spoken to Twilight a few days ago. I had kept myself focused on my dressmaking skills so I wouldn't think on it too hard.

Rarity sighed. "Yes, and she's been rather upset lately because of the scrutiny on Lyra. Apparently somepony revealed the suspicions concerning her, and neither are very happy about it."

"Why is Lyra still loose if she's a changeling?" Sweetie Belle asked.

I frowned. "That's kinda what I wanted to ask."

Rarity levitated the box of lace. "Twilight is still investigating, and she's been distracted lately by ..." She trailed off as she peered into the box. "Oh, Sweetie, this is the wrong box! This lace is buttercream yellow, not buttermilk yellow!"

"Oh, sorry." Sweetie Belle rose to her hooves. "I'll go get the right one."

"Honestly, you need to pay more attention."

"I said I was sorry," Sweetie murmured as she trotted out of the room.

My gaze lingered on her. "Huh. Maybe she really is tired if she's having trouble distinguishing colors."

Rarity set down the box. "Well, she's never had as keen an eye for it as I have, but I'm a little concerned for her just the same. Perhaps she's more upset about what happened on the train than she's letting on."

"She did admit to feeling more scared about the bugbear and the changeling than her friends were," I said. "I'll talk to her more about it."

"Please, do." She turned towards another ponyquin. "But first, let's take care of this."

I stepped over to her, my tail twitching. On the ponyquin sat the lone dress I owned.

"I was thinking earlier that red is such a good color for you, yet it's a bit too bold for fall wear," Rarity explained. "I'm so hoping that I'll be able to open a boutique in Canterlot by then, and if so, there may be a formal function or two that you can attend."

"I really don't want the dress altered," I said.

"Oh, I wouldn't dream of it, dear. I know how much this dress means to you. I want to make a new one along similar lines, but with some accents to tone down its boldness. I wanted to hold bits of lace and other materials against it to see what it looked like."

I nodded and smiled. "That sounds fine."

"Here you go, Rarity," said Sweetie as she entered the room, another box levitated before her. She held it steadier than the last one, but her face looked strained.

"Just set it down," said Rarity.

The bell from the front door chimed. "Do you want me to see who that is?" I asked.

"In a minute." Rarity levitated some bits of lace from the box. "Yes, this is the right color." She looked at the dress, a run of lace drifting towards me. "Trim this down a bit, please."

"Okay," Sweetie Belle and I said in unison.

I realized Sweetie had responded only after I had already reached out with my magic for the large scissors on the craft table. Before I could say anything, she grabbed it as well, and our magical auras overlapped and fought each other.

I felt a sudden, inexplicable chill radiate down my spine. I recoiled both physically and mentally, yanking the scissors hard just as Sweetie gasped and let go.

"Look out!" I yelled.

"My stars, what?!" Rarity cried, rearing back as the shears barely avoided clipping her muzzle.

A split second later, I heard a heart-wrenching rip.

"Oh, dear!" Rarity cried.

"I'm sorry!" Sweetie cried in a shrill voice. "It was an accident! Please, Candy, don't be mad at me!"

I sighed and stared at the ragged hole torn in the side panel of the dress, my ears drooping. I stepped closer to it, my movement stirring the air, several loose threads waving in the gap. The force of the blow had ripped some of the stitching along the edge.

"I didn't mean it, Candy, I'm sorry," Sweetie whimpered, her eyes glistening.

"It's not your fault," I said in a weak voice.

Rarity sighed and placed a hoof on my shoulder. "I'll replace it."

I shook my head. "No, it's ... don't bother, I ..."

I heard hoof-falls in the hallway. "Is everypony okay?" came Fluttershy's voice.

I turned my head and gave Fluttershy a forlorn look.

Fluttershy's gaze flicked from pony to pony. "Um, did I come at a bad time?"

Rarity stepped over to her. "No, darling, it's fine. What brings you here today?"

"Well, um, I had an idea for how we can figure this thing out with Lyra, and I thought Candy would want to come along." Her eyes flicked over to me. "And, well, Kevin is at the castle."

I frowned. My day was apparently going from good to bad to worse.

Fluttershy's ears drew back. "You don't have to come if you don't want to, I just--"

"No, I'll come," I said. I started across the room only to be intercepted by a hug from Sweetie Belle.

"Please tell me you're not mad at me," she whispered in a quavering voice.

I sighed and closed my eyes, hugging her back. "I'm not mad at you. It really was just an accident."

She smiled as I broke off the embrace.

"I'm going to get Applejack," said Rarity. "She wanted to be present when Kevin was interviewed. Come along, Sweetie."

"Huh?" Sweetie said. "Me?"

"I don't want to leave you alone. I'll be dropping you off at Sweet Apple Acres. If we see Scootaloo along the way, we'll invite her to come along so you can be with your Crusader friends."

"But Candy and I were supposed to spend the rest of the day together," said Sweetie.

"We will, I promise," I said with a faint smile.

Stepping into the council room of the castle felt like a trip into the past, as the Cutie Map was activated. I puzzled over this as my gaze scanned Equestria and came up empty. Only once I found a mountainous region well-outside its borders did I see the familiar cloud-and-lightning bolt and tri-balloon symbols spinning slowly around a high peak.

"Candy, I'm back," said Fluttershy from behind me as she stepped into the room. I heard another set of hoof-beats beside her. I turned around and ...

... This was Fluttershy's idea??

"Totally righteous to see you again, Candy," said Tree Hugger.

"Um, yeah, same here," I murmured.

Fluttershy smiled. "Since she had sensed something was off with Miss Cheerilee the other day, I thought she might be able to help here, too. Especially after she was able to calm the Smooze at the Gala."

I blinked. "She did what now?"

"I helped him get it together and find his groove again," said Tree Hugger. "Do you need the same thing?"

"I, uh ... no! That's not why I'm here."

"Bummer. Your vibe is off a bit. Just not resonating harmoniously with your chakras."

Fluttershy glanced at her. "Really? What do you think is wrong with--"

"Look, never mind my vibe!" I snapped. "Where's Twilight? I want to get this thing with Kevin over and done with."

"I'm right here, Candy," came Twilight's voice from the hall, though again I heard two sets of hooves.

My ears drew back when I saw Twilight trot into the room with Lyra on one side and Spike on the other. My legs tensed as if I intended to bolt. I narrowed my eyes as I stared at Lyra.

Twilight smiled. "Good, everypony is here. Now we can clear up this matter."

"I really hope so, Twilight," Lyra said. "I finally had everypony convinced it was the real me. I want to know who started this again so I can give that pony a piece of my mind."

I clenched my teeth to suppress a retort.

"Um, maybe who's behind it is not important," Fluttershy said nervously.

"I'm sorry I haven't spoken with you recently, Candy," said Twilight. She swept a foreleg towards the map. "I got interrupted by this."

"So Rainbow and Pinkie are not around?" I asked.

"They're on their way to the griffin kingdom to deal with a friendship problem."

I sighed. "Of course they are."

Twilight turned away and approached Tree Hugger, who smiled and said, "Totally radical place you have here, Twilight. Like, it's got such a harmonious groove. My chakras are so blissed-out right now."

Lyra cocked an eyebrow and glanced at Spike. Spike just spread his claws and shrugged.

"Why, thank you," Twilight said. "Um, I think. Anyway, I thought you might want to meet somepony new."

"Righteous!" Tree Hugger said.

"So, without further ado, Tree Hugger, this is Lyra Heartstrings. Lyra, this is Tree Hugger."

"Um, hi," said Lyra.

Tree Hugger approached her. "Oh, wow, I am, like, totally digging your vibe."

"Er ... okay?"

"You've got a groove so much like Candy's, it's just totally out there but so grounded and fresh."

Lyra lowered her head towards Spike. "Do you have any idea what's she saying?"

"Not a clue," Spike deadpanned.

"Are you into new grooves and radical energies?" Tree Hugger said. "Because I'm totally getting that from you."

Lyra's pupils shrank. "I beg your pardon?"

Fluttershy smiled. "She means she thinks you're into exotic things. That's how Tree Hugger and I connected. She recognized my interest in creatures like the Breezies."

"Oh, even more way out there than that, Fluttershy," said Tree Hugger. "It's almost cosmic."

Lyra blushed. "I-I have no idea what you're talking about! I'm not interested in exotic creatures! Or exotic anything for that matter! Um, Twilight, am I done here?"

Twilight's gaze shifted between Lyra and Tree Hugger. "Yes, I think so. Sorry for all the trouble, Lyra."

My mouth dropped open.

Lyra uttered a sigh of relief. "It's fine, Twilight. And, uh, nice to meet you, Tree Hugger, but I gotta go."

Tree Hugger smiled. "Peace."

"Er, yeah, whatever." Lyra turned and galloped away.

"You're just letting her go?!" I cried.

Twilight sighed and turned towards me. "Candy, she's not a changeling."

I stared. "You're not serious! You decided that based on what Tree Hugger said?"

"That, and all the other checking I did. And, yes, I'm taking into account what you suggested to Rarity, that Sevfivtoo found a way around my magic again."

I sighed and looked away.

"Candy, if it helps any, you were right to bring this to us," Twilight said.

I quelled my urge to protest that it did no good because I had been ignored. I had to be better than that. Think, don't emote. "Do you at least agree that something strange happened?"

"Yes, I do."

I turned my gaze towards her. "So what are you going to do about it?"

Twilight hesitated. "Let me get back to that later."

I frowned. "Why can't you tell me now?"

"I want Rarity and Applejack to hear this as well," said Twilight. "And I want to talk to Kevin first."

"Fine," I grumbled.

Fluttershy stepped up to me. "Candy? Twilight's doing everything she can."

I again quelled a nasty response. Nothing they ever did seemed to be enough.

"The others should be in the library by now," said Twilight. "We can go talk to Kevin."

My heart pounded, and I didn't bother to hide the look of contempt on my face. "All right. I'll see you later, Fluttershy."

Fluttershy swallowed. "I'm .... I-I'm going with you."

"But you said the other day--"

"I know. That's why I have to do this." She paused. "And I want to be there for you."

I smiled faintly and drew her into a hug.

"So much love," Tree Hugger said in a soft voice. "So totally groovy."

I recoiled when I saw it. I hated it, like Fluttershy had feared I would. I sustained that feeling with the thought that one of its kind had killed Michelle. Maybe that should have been enough, but I searched for reasons to justify it. I tried to find a cold, calculating resolve in its manner. I tried to find an icy indifference in its eyes. I tried to find the attitude that I was beneath its notice.

Instead, the goddamn thing refused to oblige and just fucking sat there.

It looked ... tiny, at least compared to Sevfivtoo. It sat calmly on its haunches as two members of Celestia's royal guard stood a wary watch just behind it. It looked alien enough to send flutters through my stomach, like some bizarre combination of pony and insect. The holes made it look both strange and somehow incomplete.

I heard Fluttershy gulp. Rarity trotted over to me, but my gaze was still fixed on that thing. Yes, thing. Maybe I couldn't hate it with quite the same boiling rage as I did Sevfivtoo, but I refused to make it a person.

Applejack frowned at it before turning her attention to Twilight. "Well, we're all here. Might as well get this here show on the road."

Twilight trotted up to the creature. "I'm sorry for the guards, but we can't take any chances."

The changeling nodded. "I understand, Princess. My kind have not exactly done anything to endear themselves to you."

It had that same strange two-tone, off-frequency voice like Chrysalis and Sevfivtoo. "That's a huge understatement," I muttered.

It looked at me, and I felt a chill, but it was likely in my head. "Are you Candy Swirl?"

I had not expected it to address me. "Yeah. What of it?"

"I was told of what happened to your friend. You have my sympathies."

My jaw tightened. My ears flattened.

Goddamn it.

Fuck that.

And fuck him.

"And how is that supposed to mean anything to me?!" I exploded.

"Candy, please--" Rarity began and started to wrap a fore-leg around me.

I shrugged it off and galloped over to him. To it. "You think that fixes everything?! You think you can just walk in here and spout off these words and make it all better?!"

"Candy, stop, please," Twilight said.

"Shut up, Twilight!" I glared at the changeling. "What do you know about sympathy? That's an emotion. You don't have your own emotions! You just take them from others!"

The changeling said nothing and simply cast its gaze downward.

I wanted to hit it. I wanted to throttle it. I wanted to throw something at it. A spark flew from my horn as if caught in the crossfire of the conflicting desires in my head. Before I could act, Applejack stepped in front of me and said, "That's enough."

I stumbled back a step. "What are you talking about?!"

"Ya gotta calm down, sugarcube."

"Why?! Don't I have a right to feel this way?"

"Ya got every right in the whole wide world ta be mad," said Applejack. "But it ain't helpin' matters."

I glared at her. I would have screamed at her, but my throat was too tight to speak. Both rage and grief threatened to boil up from where I had thought I had banished them.

"I know what it means ta lose a loved one, Candy. An' I know what it means ta be so angry 'bout it that ya wanna buck somethin' inta next week."

"Do you?" I croaked. "Do you really?"

"Mebbe ya didn't know that me and Apple Bloom and Big Mac don't exactly have our parents around no more."

"What does that have to ... to do with ... but ..." I trailed off when the realization struck that Apple Bloom had lost her mother at an earlier age than I had. I had assumed that nopony could possibly know how I felt.

I was good at assuming things.

"No, I didn't know," I said in a stiff voice, averting my eyes.

Applejack stepped closer to me. "Yer mad fer dang good reasons. I ain't gonna deny that. But ya gotta let Kevin speak. I know it's hard. I know it don't make the pain go away. But jus' mebbe we can stop it from happenin' ta somepony else."

I took a deep breath and nodded. I didn't give the changeling ... Kevin ... a backwards glance as I headed over to Rarity and Fluttershy. They drew me into a tight hug. I felt Fluttershy tremble.

Twilight turned back to Kevin. "Maybe you realize now the gravity of the situation."

"Perhaps it would be best if I respond to Miss Swirl's accusation," said Kevin.

I tensed, but I said nothing.

"I'm not going to apologize for what we are," said Kevin. "We live by absorbing emotions. It's food to us. If we don't feed, we die. But there's more than one way to feed. We can absorb emotions given off normally by ponies. If they're directed specifically at us, it's more nourishing. That's mainly why we disguise ourselves as other ponies."

Despite his civility, I still could not see him as any better than a parasite.

"But we can also more forcefully take emotions and energy. This kind of feeding requires more ... well, control over the pony. And it can drain them."

"Like what happened to Cherry," I muttered.

Kevin nodded. "Like what happened to her."

"I don't get it," said Applejack. "If y'all can be fine and dandy with jus' takin' in what's already there, then what's the problem?"

"It's about power," said Kevin. "Remaining passive sustains, but taking more gives us power. And most of us follow the Queen and her guidance."

Twilight's voice held a cold edge as she said, "And we all know what kind of feeding Chrysalis advocates."

"True, but for all her faults, she doesn't advocate draining to the point of death."

"Like Tartarus she doesn't!" I snapped.

Rarity tightened her foreleg around me. Fluttershy was still trembling, but she remained at my side.

"No, Miss Swirl, she doesn't," said Kevin. "Her focus on active feeding may be to our ruin, but she finds killing abhorrent."

"Then how do you explain Sevfivtoo?" I demanded.

"She was most likely acting on her own."

"Matilda said you knew her," said Twilight.

"I had the displeasure of being assigned to a task with Sevfivtoo back in the hive some years ago," Kevin explained. "She is a schemer, interested only in furthering her own influence. She had expressed her contempt for ponies' lives multiple times. She's the most ruthless being I have ever met."

Twilight gasped. "That's it! What happened at the summit makes complete sense now!"

I looked at her crossly. "Huh?"

"Ya kinda lost me there, too, Twi," said Applejack.

"Remember when Sevfivtoo was disguised as Strong Wing?" said Twilight in an excited voice. "Remember how she lied to Shining Armor about Candy's conversation with Chrysalis? I puzzled over why she never mind-magicked the other guards into corroborating the story. It makes perfect sense if Sevfivtoo had purposely sabotaged Chrysalis' plans!"

"That's one subtle bit of sabotage," Applejack said in a dubious voice.

"But fitting with Sevfivtoo's nature," Kevin said. "She's very clever. And calculating."

I trembled at the memory of the apartment but refused to cower to it. My voice remained hard as I said, "That's the same sense I got from her."

Kevin looked at me. "You saw her in her true form?"

I nodded. "Right before she made me forget seeing her."

"She used a memory-blocking spell on you?"

"A rather strong one," said Twilight. "It took outside help to overcome it."

"How big was she?" Kevin asked.

I blinked. "What?"

"We already know Sevfivtoo is larger than a normal drone," said Twilight.

"But she wasn't when I last saw her," said Kevin. "Please, Miss Swirl, how big was she?"

I had not wanted to recall it again in that much detail. Rarity gave me a gentle squeeze. "Um, maybe half your size bigger."

"She was bigger than that at the summit," Twilight said. "At least twice your size, Kevin."

Kevin frowned. "This is not good."

My heart fluttered.

"Can you elaborate on that?" said Rarity. "Considering that nothing about this is good."

"Sevfivtoo may be attempting to Ascend," said Kevin.

Twilight's pupils shrank, her wings rustling. "Ascend??"

"She desires to become a Queen, likely as a rival to Chrysalis."

"Um, that's definitely not good," Fluttershy said.

Twilight looked confused. "Is this how new Queens come about normally?"

"Changeling Queens prefer to select their successors," said Kevin. "By taking a drone showing good intelligence and, over time, feeding her more energy until she's strong enough to Ascend. It generally happens over several years. I suppose it's possible Chrysalis was grooming Sevfivtoo for this purpose, but I find that unlikely." He paused. "Princess, do you know how many other ponies Sevfivtoo has drained?"

"We don't know," Twilight said. "She drained two ponies here in Equestria pretty far that we know of, though they survived. You know about Cherry, but that happened while she was off-world."

Kevin's eyes widened. "Off-world??"

"Long story," Applejack said. "Short version: Chrysalis sent Sevfivtoo through a portal ta get an artifact, an' she didn't seem ta care who stood in her way."

I covered my pendant with a hoof. I felt my heart pounding behind it. I swallowed hard when Twilight turned to me. "Candy, do you recall any strange deaths or disappearances when--"

"Yes, I do!" I said.

"What happened?"

Visions of the alleyway played out in cold clarity in my head. "In the weeks before I came here, I kept getting in trouble with the drug dealers and didn't know why. People would disappear and I'd be blamed. They thought I was reporting them to the police. They finally tried to kill me in that alleyway. I figured out since then that Sevfivtoo was probably framing me for all that, but I just assumed those people really had been arrested, a-and not--"

"How many disappeared in this way, Miss Swirl?" Kevin asked.

I flinched slightly. "Um, five. Maybe six."

Kevin turned to Twilight. "Princess, if Sevfivtoo did indeed drain that many more ponies to the point of death, she may already have enough energy to be at least a Queenling."

"That doesn't sound good, either," said Fluttershy.

"But what in tarnation does it mean?" Applejack said.

"It means she has most of the power and magicks of a Queen," said Kevin. "But not the Royal Aura that allows her to command a hive. She likely needs more energy for that."

I glanced down at my pendant. When I raised my eyes, I found Twilight looking at it as well. She appeared thoughtful for a moment before turning back to Kevin. "I have one more question. Have you heard of a changeling named Wuntusix?"

"Yes, but I've never met her," said Kevin. "From what I've heard, she's unremarkable, but impressionable. Much more a follower than a leader. She's been seen with Sevfivtoo many times. That's all I know."

Twilight nodded. "Thank you, Kevin, this information has been very useful. I'll talk to you more later. Guards, please escort him to the main hall for now."

"Yes, Princess," said one of the guards before they both led Kevin away.

I stepped up to Twilight as she turned to face us. "Do you think that's why Sevfivtoo wants my pendant? For that last energy she needs?"

She looked me square in the eye. "She's not going to get it. I'm going to find her first."

"An' how are ya gonna do that when she's been more slippery than a muddy pig?" said Applejack.

"If Kevin is right, and Sevfivtoo is almost a Queen, then she has a magical resonance similar to Chrysalis," said Twilight. "I can use that to find her."

Fluttershy shivered. "But she could be anywhere outside Ponyville!"

Rarity moved alongside me. "It does sound like a formidable task."

Twilight smiled. "Not if I use the wards. I can modify them to send out a pulse tuned to Chrysalis' resonance. If Sevfivtoo's resonance is close enough to hers, I'll detect it."

Applejack looked dubious. "Ya sure that'll work?"

"I have to try," said Twilight.

"Yer puttin' a whole lotta faith in the word of another changelin', Twi."

"I know, but it's all I have to go on right now." Twilight's gaze flicked between myself, Rarity, and Applejack. "It's absolutely urgent now. I believe Wuntusix infiltrated the train back from Canterlot."

Rarity gasped. "Oh, no! Lyra really is a changeling?"

"Um, I don't think so," Fluttershy said. "Not according to Tree Hugger."

"I still don't buy that!" I snapped. "No offense to your friend, Fluttershy, but that's hardly--"

"Candy, Tree Hugger was not the only means I used," Twilight declared. "I don't have time to go into the details. Lyra is not the changeling, but somepony else is. And ... it may be one of the Crusaders."

My heart froze.

Applejack gasped and recoiled. "Twilight, no! It can't be ... n-not Apple Bloom?!"

"Great Celestia, it can't be Sweetie Belle!" Rarity cried in a quavering voice.

Fluttershy swallowed hard. "M-maybe it's not either of them, maybe it's Scootaloo." She whimpered and cast her gaze downward. "What am I saying?? That's just as bad!"

"An' we left 'em all together at the farm!" Applejack cried.

"S-Sweetie Belle's been tired and clumsy lately," Rarity said in a horrified voice. "What if she's being drained by a changeling she thinks is her friend?!"

Twilight flared her wings. "Please, everypony, calm down! Panicking is going to get us nowhere."

Rarity swallowed hard. "Y-you're right, Twilight. I'm terribly sorry."

"So'm I," said Applejack. "But what are we gonna do?"

"Obviously, we need to find out which one is the changeling!" Rarity said.

"But how? They all passed Twilight's scan with flyin' colors!"

"Maybe Tree Hugger can find out!" Fluttershy said.

My heart pounded so hard that my chest ached. My mind raced, memories of the past few days crashing into incoherency from the tumult of my emotions. I swallowed hard and fought to make sense of them. Or maybe I just didn't want to. I didn't want to believe it could be Sweetie Belle, the thought twisting my stomach until I felt as if I were about to throw up. I cast my wavering gaze at Twilight, and the sad look in her eyes made my blood run cold, as if she had just guessed the conclusion I had come to that Rarity would never accept.

But why should I accept it? Did I read too much into a single look? Why wouldn't Sweetie Belle be so clingy if the incident on the train had frightened her? My own tiredness could be just stress and not having my energy sucked away by a changeling.

And yet she was so eager to accept Lyra being the changeling.

And she had been the one to first implicate Lyra.

And she simply did not want to leave my side, as if she had to be close to me when some sort of signal was given.

"It's very likely that these two changelings are working together," said Twilight. "The longer they don't realize that we're on to them, the better chance we have of stopping Sevfivtoo."

Applejack frowned. "I don't like this, Twi. I don't think we should try ta take her down until Rainbow and Pinkie are back."

"Yes, why can't we just find out who the changeling is now and worry about Sevfivtoo later?" Rarity demanded.

"Because until I know where Sevfivtoo is keeping the real pony, I don't want to do anything to jeopardize that filly's life!" Twilight cried. "We're dealing with a changeling willing to kill! If we can find and rescue the pony she's taken first, we won't have to worry about her being hurt in retaliation."

Applejack swallowed hard. "Even if it ain't Apple Bloom, I'm scared for her right now."

Rarity's eyes shimmered. She opened her mouth as if to speak, but looked at me instead. I had no words for her. My thoughts threatened to shatter the illusion of numb calm that had settled over me; one moment I refused to believe Sweetie Belle could be the changeling, the next moment it seemed inevitable. Emotion needed the former; logic dictated the latter. I wanted desperately to listen to my heart, but I knew I should listen to my brain instead.

Twilight started to pace. "We need to act as if nothing has changed, but we can't let the Crusaders remain unsupervised. If Lyra was set up as a distraction, then whatever they're planning may happen soon."

"I think we should keep the Crusaders at their tree house," Applejack said.

"Should Candy stay away from them?" Fluttershy asked. "So she's not at risk?"

"Fluttershy's right!" Rarity cried. "Maybe we should keep her and the Crusaders as far apart as possible so--"

"No," I heard myself say.

"Candy, please, I--"

"I can't stay away from Sweetie Belle!"

Rarity sighed. "I know, I also hope that Sweetie Belle isn't--"

"That's not what I mean," I said in a shaky voice. "If she really is ... I-I mean ... I already promised her I'd spend time with her today. She still thinks we suspect Lyra of being a changeling. If everything suddenly changes now, won't that warn them we know something is up, no matter which one is the changeling?"

"But one of us can stand watch over them instead!"

I rolled my eyes. "Oh, right, seeing an adult suddenly hovering over them watching their every move won't look the least bit suspicious."

"But, Candy, you ... I ..." Rarity's face twisted into a grimace, and she stomped a hoof. "I hate these changelings! I wish I had never encountered the wretched creatures!"

Fluttershy averted her eyes and bit her lower lip.

"I think Candy's got a point," Applejack said. "But keep 'em all at the farm. Rarity an' Fluttershy can come along an' stay at the house jus' in case while Twi works her magic ta find Sevfivtoo."

Twilight turned to me. "Candy, nopony can make you do this."

I nodded halfway through her statement. "I know."

"Don't take any risks. Don't try to move against her unless you feel you have no choice. Go get Applejack and the others if anything happens."

My throat felt tight. I glanced at Rarity. She was almost in tears. How I managed not to be in the same state eluded me, especially considering neither of us knew whether the real Sweetie Belle was alive or dead.

"You won't be without protection," said Twilight. "I'm going to use a new spell, one that won't rely on your pendant." Her eyes narrowed. "I don't want any more incidents of Cherry or the avatar draining energy from it."

I could not allow myself to even consider Michelle somehow colluding with the changelings, as it would surely shatter my resolve. That had to wait until later. I had to focus all my attention on Sweetie Belle. I had to find out for sure.

I had to know if I were again about to lose somepony I loved.

Jump to top

Chapter 35 - Rage

"Howdy, Candy!" said Apple Bloom. "We've been waitin' fer ya."

I hesitated at the entrance to the tree house, my heart skipping a beat. My eyes flicked between Apple Bloom and Scootaloo as they smiled at me. I shifted my gaze to Sweetie Belle. She sat on her haunches, her eyes narrowed in concentration, a crayon moving carefully in her magical grip.

"Waiting for me?" I said. "Why?"

"Well, this was sorta your idea to start with," said Scootaloo.

"An' we wanted ta make sure ya got yer chance to earn yer cutie mark, too," said Apple Bloom.

"Cutie mark in what?" I glanced down. Several heart-shaped art projects littered the floor. "Oh."

"Get-well card makin' of course!" Apple Bloom declared.

"Miss Cheerilee liked our card so much we decided to make more," Scootaloo said.

"We went around Ponyville askin' who else might be sick, an' we're gonna make cards fer all of 'em!"

"But it's kinda more than we can handle."

"Seems poor Miss Cheerilee gave the pony pox to a few others before she realized what she had," Apple Bloom said.

I managed a small smile. Besides being incredibly sweet, it would keep them occupied for a while. I could not have asked for better timing.

I heard the crayon drop. Sweetie Belle rose to her hooves and trotted over to me. My heart raced, and I trembled slightly as she gave me a hug. I slowly put my fore-legs around her. She felt just as soft and warm as she had always been. I could smell the faint floral scent of the shampoo she had used on her mane that morning.

She turned her head towards the others without breaking off the embrace. "I dunno, Apple Bloom, it's going to be a lot of work, and I wanted to spend the day with Candy." She turned back to me. "That's what you're here for, right? To take me back home?"

"Not just yet, Sweetie," I said immediately. Don't hesitate. I had drilled that into my head all the way over there. Business as usual.

"Something wrong?"

"Of course not," I said firmly. "Why would you think so?"

"You just seem a little nervous."

So was that just Sweetie Belle's normal perceptive nature, or a changeling sensing my emotions? My heart thundered with undirected fear; I had no idea who to be more scared for, her or myself. I glanced at the other Crusaders as if hoping for some subtle clue that maybe it was one of them instead, only to hate myself for wishing this upon anypony. "Oh, um, they're still trying to resolve the mess with Lyra."

Apple Bloom frowned and stepped towards me. "Consarn it, what's there ta resolve?"

Scootaloo joined her and nodded. "She's a changeling! What more do they need to know?"

"Sweetie Belle told us all 'bout her before ya got here," Apple Bloom said, likely in response to my surprised stare at their sudden hostile tone.

"I can hardly wait until Rainbow Dash is back," Scootaloo said. "She'll take care of that changeling for sure."

"If my big sister don't buck her all the way back ta the badlands herself."

"How about they both take turns?"

Apple Bloom grinned. "Sounds like a great idea ta me! Meantime, soon as we get a chance, we'll spread the word 'bout Lyra the changelin'."

"Girls, just don't worry about it right now," I said, my voice quavering slightly. "Let's just go back to making the cards."

What had happened while the rest of us were in the castle? Did Sweetie Belle convince them with her words, or did she do something else? Were this Earth, I could hold out hope this was nothing more than a nightmare, and if I waited long enough, I would soon wake up.

"You promised me we'd spend time together," Sweetie said in a soft, forlorn voice.

"I know, Sweetie, and we will, but ... a little later."

"Today, though? Please?"

Twilight words haunted me: whatever they're planning may happen soon. I was supposed to maintain this charade only for as long as it took Twilight to complete her work with the wards. I assumed if the others were going to head off on some rescue operation that one of them would come and tell me. I forced a smile and wondered how much a changeling's senses could detect the lie. "Yes, today. I promise."

I finished coloring my third card. How I had managed to get through so many in my delicate magical state, I had no idea. Every use of my horn sent a maddening tingle into my head and partially down my spine. Twilight had infused her spell into my body, and she had warned me it would interfere with my own use of magic if I pushed it too far. She had tried to explain how it worked, but I started zoning out when she rambled on about thaumic this or phasing that.

I had no idea how much time had passed, just that it was too long. Enough, at least, for the angle of the sun to have changed noticeably. Sweetie Belle sat close enough for her fur to brush against mine whenever either of us moved.

"Three whole cards!" said Apple Bloom. "That's some good work."

"Maybe we should stop here," said Sweetie Belle as she snuggled against me.

Don't tremble. Don't recoil. Don't hesitate. "Let's start on the next one and ... um, then we'll see about quitting."

"But it's getting late," said Sweetie.

"It's not all that late," said Scootaloo.

"Yeah, there's plenty of daylight left," said Apple Bloom.

"Well, I need to use the little filly's room first," Sweetie said. "Candy, will you take me?"

I managed not to flinch. "Oh, well, Sweetie, I'm sure you've been here hundreds of times and know the way to the house."

"I do, I just want some protection. You know, from the changeling."

"Good idea, Sweetie," said Apple Bloom. She looked at me. "Yeah, ya gotta protect Sweetie Belle. That's real important."

"Yeah, you don't want to take any chances," said Scootaloo.

My mind raced to find some reason -- any reason -- to cast doubt on the whole theory. The only thing that didn't make sense was her weakness. Why would she be weak if she had been feeding off my emotions? Didn't that mean somepony else was the changeling and was draining her, like Rarity had thought? Could Sweetie's need for escort be no more than a plea from a little pony more scared than she wants to let on?

Or was it the changeling's plan to get me alone? "If you're all so concerned, then perhaps we can all go to the house together."

Apple Bloom looked dubious. "I did kinda wanted ta keep workin' on this, though."

"We were going at it pretty good," said Scootaloo.

"But I guess if ya really want--"

"Um, it's okay," said Sweetie as she parted from me. "I'll just go by myself."

My heart ached. Was she sad I was ignoring her needs or was she disappointed her plan failed?

"Are you sure about that?" Scootaloo asked.

Sweetie headed towards the door. "Yeah, I'm sure."

"Sweetie, please make sure you get back here soon," I said.

"All right," Sweetie Belle said in a reluctant voice. She gave me one last glance before heading down the ladder.

"I'm not sure ya should leave her alone," Apple Bloom said with a slight frown.

"It'll be okay, girls," I said. "Now, let's get back to this ..."

"I knew ya shoulda gone with her!" Apple Bloom exclaimed.

"She should've been back ages ago!" Scootaloo said.

Apple Bloom trotted over to the window and looked out. "We gotta go look for her!"

Scootaloo joined her. "Maybe the changeling did get onto the farm!"

"Girls, please, stop it!" I cried. "It ... it hasn't been that long."

Apple Bloom turned to face me. "Like hay it hasn't! She never takes that long ta get back from the house."

"Maybe she just stopped to get a snack, or something to drink," I said.

Apple Bloom frowned. "I reckon we shouldn't take any chances. We gotta make sure she's okay."

Dammit, where was Twilight? How long did it take to do that magic of hers? Should I just wait it out? I had to do something or the Crusaders would take matters into their own hooves again. Regardless of whether they exhibited just normal loyalty towards a friend or a mind-controlled fixation, I doubted I could contain them much longer.

I stepped over to them. "All right, fine. I'll go look for her."

"We're comin' with ya," Apple Bloom said.

I stomped a hoof. "No! Stay right here."

"Why?" Scootaloo demanded. "We're her friends, too!"

"Yeah, make up yer mind!" Apple Bloom snapped. "First ya want us all along an' now ya don't!"

I had no intention of playing the changeling's game. I was going to gallop straight for the house and fetch the others exactly as Twilight had said. "I don't want you to be hurt if--"

"Consarn all that!" Apple Bloom said. "We're all Crusaders. We stick together."

"Yeah! If you're going to look for her, so are we," Scootaloo said.

I sighed and ran a hoof through my mane. Even if I did get them to agree to stay, I doubted they would remain here for very long. Then I would have to worry about them being hurt when I wasn't there to help them. "Listen to me carefully, girls," I said in a firm voice. "We'll go together, but we're heading to the house first."

"Why do we have to do that?" Apple Bloom asked.

"So we can fetch your sister and brother, and they can help us look. Don't you think they'd be concerned for Sweetie Belle, too?"

Apple Bloom and Scootaloo exchanged a cautious look. I had to find some way around whatever false logic had been planted in their heads.

"She has a point," Scootaloo said.

Apple Bloom looked thoughtful. "I s'pose she does. Mebbe we'll get lucky an' run inta Sweetie Belle on the way there."

That was the last thing I wanted. "All right, let's go." I headed towards the door. "And stick close behind me."

Apple Bloom tilted her head. "Behind ya?"

"Yes, behind me. Please."

"Well, all right."

My heart thumped as they followed me out. Yes, this was another risk, if we were all wrong about Sweetie Belle, and it really was one of the other Crusaders. It seemed unlikely, but everything I did was a calculated risk. I shivered as I wondered if I had fallen into a similar pattern of thought as Sevfivtoo, weighing every option and calculating possibilities down to the last decimal point.

The farm suddenly seemed as alien as it had been when I had first arrived. I swallowed hard and set out. The path that had been worn into the ground from the Crusaders' hooves was now my lifeline. My ears swiveled as I tracked the sound of the Crusaders trotting along behind me.

Scootaloo suddenly gasped and cried out, "Look over there!"

Before I could turn around, she dashed off the path and into the trees. "Scootaloo! Get back here!"

The words had barely left my mouth when Apple Bloom galloped over to join her. They stopped beside a tree, and Scootaloo pointed a hoof towards the bark.

My heart leaped into my throat. On the bark was a spot of glistening green goo.

Apple Bloom's pupils shrank. "The changelin' is on the farm!"

Scootaloo turned her head and pointed to another tree. "There's more further on."

They rushed over to it before I could stop them. I galloped up as they stared at another dollop of the substance hanging from a small branch just above their heads.

"Where's the rest of the trail lead?" Apple Bloom said.

I bolted around them and blocked the way. "Girls, stop. We're not following any trail, period."

"But Sweetie Belle could be in trouble!" Apple Bloom cried.

Scootaloo frowned. "Why don't you want to look for her?"

"Yeah, Candy, it's mighty suspicious that ya don't wanna look fer yer own sister!"

Scootaloo gasped. "Maybe Candy is the changeling!"

"I am not a changeling!" I exclaimed.

Apple Bloom narrowed her eyes. "Jus' the thing I'd expect a changelin' ta say."

I face-hoofed. "Look, this is the same setup as the White Tail Woods. We're being led into some sort of trap. Best thing to do is--"

A plaintive, distant cry rose from further into the trees, and my heart lurched. "Candy? Are you out there? I kinda need some help. Please?"

"That's Sweetie Belle!" Scootaloo cried.

"We're comin' fer ya, Sweetie!" Apple Bloom shouted.

I caught them in my fore-legs and stopped them.

"Candy, what in tarnation are ya doin'?!" Apple Bloom cried.

Scootaloo fluttered her wings, her feathers tickling my muzzle and almost making me sneeze. "I told you she's the changeling!"

Despite her youth, Apple Bloom already had good earth pony strength, my rear hooves dragging the ground trying to keep her contained. This dashed any hope I had of carrying them back to the house. Maybe my magic had improved to the point where I could pick her up, but with Twilight's spell still tingling inside me, that would likely fizzle.

"All right, listen to me!" I cried. "Fine. We'll go. But you're going to stay right behind me. And if she's okay, we're all going to head back to the house together."

Apple Bloom frowned. "Why should we listen to you?"

"Because this is just a ploy to get me alone with her."

"Candy?" came Sweetie's distant voice. "Can you help me, please? I think I'm stuck."

"She's only calling to me," I said. "We've been making enough of a ruckus that she knows you two are here. Why isn't she calling out to you as well?"

Scootaloo stopped struggling and looked uncertain. She glanced at me and then Apple Bloom. "Yeah, why isn't Sweetie Belle calling out to all of us? That is kinda weird."

"I don't care," Apple Bloom said, though her tone was less combative. "She's in trouble and we gotta help her."

Was I finally getting through to them? I carefully let go, and neither bolted. "Okay, let's go find her together."

Apple Bloom looked around as we entered a small clearing. "Hey, Candy, ain't this where ya first showed up?"

My heart fluttered as I trod the same ground where I had first opened my eyes to find several strange equine creatures staring at me. I glanced down at my hooves and remembered seeing them for the first time. The anxiety, fear, and eventually hope that had followed had come full circle.

"There she is!" Scootaloo cried, breaking me out of my reverie. Apple Bloom and I followed, and my throat tightened as I saw Sweetie Belle standing at the base of a tree.

"Are ya all right?" Apple Bloom said. "Ya had us all worried!"

"Sorry," Sweetie Belle said in a soft voice. She looked up at me, her eyes glistening. "I thought you'd come for me right away. Are you mad at me?"

"I'm not mad at you," I said. "I just ... well, never mind."

Apple Bloom trotted over to Sweetie. "Why ya standin' like that?"

Sweetie tugged a rear hoof, but it remained firmly on the ground between two roots. "I'm stuck. I took a little walk and got my hoof wedged in."

"I got this!" Apple Bloom said. She turned herself around, braced her fore-hooves in the ground, and pressed her rear-hooves against the far root. Her muscles tensed as she pushed, the root crackling faintly as it gave.

Sweetie plucked her hoof out and smiled. "Thanks."

"No problem."

"All right," I began. "Now that Sweetie is okay, we can all head--"

Before I could finish my sentence, Sweetie Belle had all but thrown herself at me, wrapping her fore-legs around me in a tight hug. My heart skipped a beat, and I held my breath, yet nothing happened. I slowly wrapped my fore-legs around her.

"Ya know, it's gettin' kinda late now," said Apple Bloom. "Mebbe ya should jus' head on home together."

"I'd like that," Sweetie Belle said softly.

"I should probably head home, too," said Scootaloo.

"Not before heading back to the house," I said firmly. Sweetie squirmed in our embrace, and I loosened my hold on her. "Sorry to harp on that, but--"

I cast my gaze downward just as Sweetie Belle touched a fore-hoof to my pendant.

Light flashed around me to the startled cries of the other Crusaders. Magical energy bounced and raced across the triggered shield like tiny pebbles bouncing off concrete, the energies scattering to the winds. A miniature nova blossomed between us. I stumbled and fell back on my haunches from the force, and Sweetie Belle tumbled back head-over-hooves.

"Sweetie! Candy! You two all right?!" Scootaloo cried.

"What in tarnation jus' happened?!" Apple Bloom said.

I stared.

I just stared.

Denial ceased to be an option. Hope ceased to be a possibility. It had all shattered in that one moment of betrayal.

"Candy, yer tremblin'," Apple Bloom said. "Are ya hurt?"

"Are you okay, Sweetie Belle?" Scootaloo asked.

Their words just slid around me like a stream flowing around rocks. A numbness had settled over me, lifting only slowly, yet leaving me with an icy chill.

Sweetie Belle rose to her hooves. "Um ... I think so. I guess we should--"

"Apple Bloom, Scootaloo," I said in a stiff voice. "Head back to the house and get the others."

Sweetie's pupils shrank. "Maybe I should go with them."

My jaw tightened. "No, you're staying here. You might be hurt, too. And ... you wanted some time alone with me, didn't you?"

"Um, yes, but ..."

"Don't worry none, Sweetie!" Apple Bloom said. "Me an' Scootaloo will go fetch the others an' be right back. Come on!"

As the hoof-beats of the Crusaders faded, I slowly rose to my hooves and stepped forward. I narrowed my eyes as the last moments of Michelle's mortal life played out in my head. I saw myself again on the wrong end of a bullet meant to end my life. My brain sailed off into an abyss of boiling darkness as it envisioned a lifeless little white pony I had come to call "sister," and my own broken body lying before the horrified stares of two little kids.

All for a stupid piece of gold.

"You are mad at me, aren't you?" it said.

My horn blazed. I picked up "Sweetie Belle" and threw it as hard as I could against the nearest tree.

It cried out in alarm. I threw it again.

It called my name and begged me to stop. I threw it again.

It uttered a shrill scream. I threw it again.

A thunder of hoof-beats rose behind me. "Candy, what in Celestia's name are you doing to Sweetie Belle?!" screeched Rarity's horrified voice behind me.

I pinned the monster to the tree only a moment before Rarity wrapped her fore-legs around me and tried to pull me away. I stayed on my hooves and screamed, "THAT'S NOT SWEETIE BELLE! It's the monster that replaced her! She just tried to do something to me and triggered Twilight's shield spell!"

Rarity flinched in shock, and her grip loosened slightly. Similar looks radiated from the faces of the others.

"Rarity, please, make her stop! She's hurting me!" the monster cried in a voice so convincingly heart-wrenching that even I shuddered briefly.

"Put her down, Candy," Applejack said in a firm voice. "Right now."

"C-Candy, please," Fluttershy pleaded. "Before you do something you'll regret."

"My only regret is my magic's not strong enough to throw her clear through the tree," I growled.

The monster started crying her eyes out. Stop it, dammit, stop it!

Rarity pulled at me again. "Candy, do what Applejack said!"

"Didn't you hear me?! This. Is. Not. Sweetie Belle! She's the changeling!"

Rarity swallowed hard. "I-I know, you're probably right, but what if--?!"

Light flashed, and suddenly Twilight was there.

I turned my head, and my eyes widened. Her mane was in disarray. Her feathers were ruffled. My breath caught when I saw one foreleg curled around a filly covered in enough green goo that, for one heart-stopping moment, she remained unrecognizable.

Twilight gently placed her down, and I saw a horn and a lock of pink-purple mane. My legs went weak from the intensity of my relief. She launched herself at Rarity and I, and this time, I accepted without hesitation. Tears streamed down my face as we both drew the real Sweetie Belle into a fierce hug.

We both had green goo on our fur, mane, and hooves, but we didn't care. I heard Rarity sob softly. In my distraction, my magic faded, and the changeling fell to the ground.

"Tarnation, Twilight, what happened?!" Applejack said in a stunned voice.

"I'll tell you later," said Twilight in a curt voice. She marched over to the fake Sweetie Belle. "Drop the disguise, Wuntusix. Now!"

I lifted my head in time to see the creature give Twilight a pleading look before her form shimmered, and I flinched as an insect-pony took its place.

The thing was no bigger than Kevin had been. I didn't care how big or small it was. My rage had not even begun to be expended. Even knowing Sweetie Belle was safe did nothing to quell it. I broke off the embrace and started towards it, my teeth bared.

I heard a gasp and a rush of wing, and suddenly Fluttershy was hovering in front of me, her fore-hooves on my shoulders. "Candy, please, don't!"

"Why not?!" I yelled. "That thing's been leeching off me for the past few days! It tried to kill me, right in front of Apple Bloom and Scootaloo!"

"I-I didn't try to drain you," the changeling said in a weak voice. "I wasn't t-trying to kill you."

I shivered at the alien sound of its voice. "Shut up," I growled through clenched teeth.

I tried to go around Fluttershy, but she pushed me back. "There's no point in doing this. I know you can't stop hating it, but you don't have to act on it."

"But ... but that thing ...!"

"Candy, you once told me ... you pleaded with me that you're not a monster."

My mouth fell open, and I trembled.

"I believed that then, and I believe it now," said Fluttershy. "But you have to as well."

My throat tightened. I wanted to protest that this was hardly the same thing, but no words would come. I glanced past Fluttershy and shuddered when my gaze fell on that disgusting thing. Like with Kevin, I tried to find something to justify my hate. And like Kevin, it just fucking sat there, its gaze downcast. It didn't look even the least bit injured. Should I be angry or relieved?

A purple ball of energy formed around the creature. "This will hold it until we can get the sheriff," said Twilight. "Sweetie Belle hasn't been drained, but she should be taken to the hospital so they can check her out. I wanted to bring her here first so you all knew she was okay."

Rarity hugged Twilight tightly. "Twilight, thank you. You can't imagine what this means to me to see Sweetie safe. I'll take her down there straight away."

"Do I really have to go to the stupid hospital?" Sweetie Belle said. "I'm all right. I just need a bath."

"Listen to Twilight and Rarity, please, Sweetie," I said in a shaky voice.

Sweetie turned to me. "You okay?" She glanced at the changeling, her eyes uncertain. "You don't have to be mad anymore, Candy, I'm fine. I don't like seeing you mad, even if it's at somepony else."

I glanced at Fluttershy. She smiled gently at me. I turned towards Sweetie Belle, the real one, the one I had come to love as if she had been my sister all along. She deserved better than to see me act like this. I gave her another hug. "Yeah, I'm okay now, Sweetie."

"Sorry I got gunk all over you."

I hugged her tighter. "I'm just glad you're safe now."

"Come on, everypony, let's get back ta the house," said Applejack. "Apple Bloom and Scootaloo are gonna wanna know everythin's okay."

I had thought Ponyville was rustic, but that paled in comparison to Applejack's house. All I cared about was that it had plenty of hot water. My mane and tail were left a little poofy, but I was sure I could be forgiven for lack of style.

Even if I had trouble forgiving myself for what I had almost done.

Apple Bloom intercepted me on my way back to the living room. "I'm sorry I didn't listen ta ya earlier, Candy. I never thought fer a moment Sweetie Belle coulda been the changelin'."

I smiled faintly. "It's okay. Even when I knew, I had hoped I was wrong."

"That dang changelin' musta done somethin' ta me and Scootaloo."

"Where is Scootaloo, anyway?"

"They sent her on home," said Apple Bloom. "Twilight an' the others are waitin' fer ya."

"Thanks," I said as I started past her.

"Oh, um, hey, Candy?" Apple Bloom said in a tentative voice.

I stopped and turned. "Yeah?"

She cast her gaze down for a moment before stepping up to me. "While ya were in the shower, Applejack reminded me how ya had lost yer Mom when ya were kinda young."

My stomach quivered. "Yeah, that's right. What about it?"

"If, um, ya ever need ta talk about it, lemme know, okay?"

My eyes misted. I didn't think I deserved such consideration, but I gave Apple Bloom a hug. "I will, I promise."

She smiled at me as I broke off the embrace. My gaze lingered on her as I headed into the living room. Twilight paced as Applejack stood nearby. Fluttershy trotted over to me. "Are you feeling better now?"

"Yeah." I averted my gaze. "Um, I'm sorry about before, I shouldn't have acted that way, I just ..."

Fluttershy touched a hoof to my shoulder. "Candy, it's okay."

I swallowed and said in a voice barely above a whisper, "It's not okay. I almost--"

"But you didn't."

"Only because you all arrived in time to stop me."

"I still don't think you would've done it."

I bit my lower lip. I had wanted to kill it. Wasn't that all that mattered?

"Please, Candy," said Fluttershy. "Don't beat yourself up over it. It won't do any good."

I could not let it go, but I had no more emotional strength left to handle it at that moment. I simply nodded and looked around. "Where's Rarity?"

"Rarity said she was going to take Sweetie Belle home after they left the hospital," said Twilight. "Can you fill her in later, please?"

"I can, sure."

"Thank you. And before we start ..." She trotted up to me and lowered her head. Her horn glowed, and she reapplied that sphere of energy around my pendant she had previously done at the castle. "I don't want anything we say being overheard."

"So out with it, Twi," said Applejack with a trace of annoyance in her voice. "What happened, and why didn't ya fetch the rest of us?"

Twilight sighed. "I didn't have time. My idea of using the wards worked perfectly, and I found Sevfivtoo, but she was headed directly for one of the wards. When I got there, she was in the process of subverting it for her own purposes. She flew off into the woods, but I found her camp and got there before she did. That's when I found Sweetie Belle." She frowned. "I fought Sevfivtoo, but when she realized she was outmatched, she forced me to make a decision between taking her down and rescuing Sweetie Belle."

Fluttershy shivered. "Oh, goodness ..."

"Ya made the right call there," said Applejack. "So is Sevfivtoo this Queenlin' thing Kevin mentioned?"

"Yes, she is," said Twilight. "But nowhere near as powerful as Chrysalis."

Applejack narrowed her eyes. "Yet."

"She knows she can't stand up to me in a one-on-one battle until she Ascends, and maybe not even then, since Chrysalis took time to reach the power she's at now."

"Twilight, the changeling disguised as Sweetie Belle tried to kill ..." I trailed off. "Well, I'm not sure what she did, but your shield stopped it."

"I know, I sensed it trigger, but I was in the middle of battling Sevfivtoo," Twilight said. "It was soon after that she realized her plan had failed, and she used the threat of harm to Sweetie Belle to force me to break off the attack."

"What in tarnation was her plan?" Applejack asked.

"I took a quick look at that ward she had altered. I didn't do a complete analysis, as I wanted to get Sweetie Belle to safety and get to Candy in case she needed help, but it had a resonance similar to mind-magicks."

My stomach turned, and my throat clicked when I swallowed.

Fluttershy gasped. "Sh-she was trying to mind-control Candy??"

"Whoa, wait a doggone minute here," said Applejack. "From that far away?"

Twilight nodded. "My guess is she was trying to use the pendant as a conduit for her magic, which is why I shielded it from our conversation."

I shivered, and my stomach twisted again. With Sweetie Belle safe, it left my mind open to consider yet another unthinkable idea, that Michelle was somehow colluding with the changelings, whether by accident or at the direction of the avatar of Starswirl.

"The pendant has already shown an ability to project magic a fair distance when Cherry manifested to Candy," Twilight explained. "Sevfivtoo was trying to do something similar in reverse, but it required a spell cast on the pendant."

"So that answers the 'what'," said Applejack. "What about the 'why'?"

"The only thing I can think of is Discord's clue about Candy bringing the pendant to her. Sevfivtoo may have attempted to force Candy to do just that. Sevfivtoo has experience with such strong mind-magicks, but since she was blocked from entering Ponyville, she had to resort to this. Perhaps she had expected that the shield spell would still be tied to the pendant, and thus she could circumvent it somehow."

I swallowed hard and stepped up to Twilight. "Y-you don't think that Cherry had anything to do with this, do you?"

Twilight's gaze met mine. "I have to be honest with you, Candy, at this point I just don't know. I'm going to talk to Zecora and see if she can change her potion to allow two ponies to visit the realm in the pendant. I'm tired of flying blind. I want answers."

I wanted answers as well, and I was just as determined to get them.

Even if it meant destroying a friendship that had defined my life for so many years.

Author's Note

Next update will be delayed a few days (I posted a blog entry on it if anyone is interested). Next chapter will be posted June 7th.

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Chapter 36 - Divided Loyalties

"I'm really sorry your dress got damaged," said Sweetie Belle as she trotted alongside me. "Even if it wasn't the real me who did it."

I smiled faintly as I levitated the dress before me and opened the closet door with another nudge of magic. It reminded me of the last time Sweetie had been in my room. All I could see were the things I would have done differently had I the chance to do it over again.

Sweetie Belle jumped onto my bed. "Did you try repairing it? You did such a great job with Bon Bon's dress."

I placed the dress back in the closet and tried fruitlessly to turn it so that the ragged hole did not show. "A patch can never bring it back to the way it was. And, really, Bon Bon's dress was just practice."

"Still, you might want to try." Sweetie smiled. "If just to make Rarity more proud of you than she already is."

I hesitated before nudging the closet door closed. Such a statement should have sparked a sense of joy. I wanted Rarity to be proud of me. Just like I always wanted my mother to be proud of me.

When I had stepped into the living room of Applejack's home after Twilight rescued Sweetie Belle, I had sought Rarity as a hurt little girl would look for her mother. While I had appreciated Fluttershy's support, she was not the one I had wanted -- and still desperately needed -- to hear from concerning what I had almost done.

I stepped over to the bed. "Sweetie, this may sound like an odd question but ... do you ever look up to Rarity as a sort of, well, mother figure?"

"Mm, not really, no," Sweetie said. "I mean, she does mother-like stuff for me." She rolled her eyes. "And she bosses me around like my mother might sometimes, but she really is my older sister."

"But do you miss your parents not being around?"

"Yeah, I do, sometimes," Sweetie said in a soft voice. "I kinda felt that way right after Twilight rescued me."

"That reminds me. Are you doing okay with that?"

"It's better," Sweetie Belle said. "Princess Luna didn't even have to help me with the nightmares last night. And the mailmare delivered a message from my parents this morning. They're going to be in town a few days from now."

I smiled. "I'll look forward to meeting them."

Sweetie Belle looked thoughtful. "What about you?"

"Huh? Oh, um, I'm doing fine. No nightmares, at least. I'm wondering if they got any information out of Wuntusix."

"I didn't mean that," Sweetie said softly. "How do you feel about Rarity?"

I should have expected Sweetie to be so direct. I had wanted to take Michelle's advice to heart, but now it seemed all her supposed wisdom had been tainted. The spirit that resided in my pendant seemed more unlike Michelle each time I thought about it. Or was that just me making another excuse to avoid the issue?

I climbed onto the bed and sat next to Sweetie. "Can you keep a secret?"

She smiled. "Sure!"

"I really want to see Rarity as my mother."

"That's great!" Sweetie cried. "Oh, but, wait, does that make me your aunt? That's kinda weird, though. Can I keep being your sister?"

Dammit, I had such a hard time staying upset around her. My lips twitched into a tiny smile. "Don't worry, we can keep being sisters. And, to be honest, I'm not sure if what I feel towards Rarity is right."

"Why not?" When I didn't reply right away, she added, "Are you afraid Rarity might not like it?"

That had not really crossed my mind, but I supposed it was a possibility. Perhaps I felt closer to her than I had realized if I had never considered rejection. "No, it's not that. It's ... it's sort of how you don't look up to Rarity as a mother even though your parents are not around all the time. You don't want to replace your real mother."

Sweetie Belle remained silent for a long moment. "But ... you told me your mother is gone. Is that really the same thing?"

I managed to keep my voice steady. "Apple Bloom lost both her parents. Does she look to anypony else as a mother or father?"

Sweetie considered. "No, I don't think so. But it's kinda different with her. She's got a large family, and she has something to remember her parents by."

"She does?"

"Yeah, something on the farm. She can explain it better than I can. You should talk to her about it."

I recalled Apple Bloom's invite that day. "I guess I will."

"Don't you have something to remember your mother by?"

"Not really, no," I said.

"I thought you told me your mother gave you that pendant."

I forced myself to lower the hoof I had only realized then had risen to touch my pendant. "The problem, Sweetie, is that the pendant has lots of memories associated with it. Not all of them are good. Sometimes I have trouble seeing one for the other."

Sweetie gave me a hug. "I'm sorry to hear that, Candy. I wish I could help you more."

I closed my eyes and hugged her tightly. I wished I could express the love I felt for Rarity as easily as I could the love I felt for Sweetie Belle. "Let's head over to the clubhouse, there's still a few get-well cards to finish."

Sweetie Belle smiled. "Sure."

Rarity had eased up on her training lessons, both in magic and fashion, so I could have time to reconnect with Sweetie Belle and wind down from the events on the farm. Ironically, those days were often spent on that very farm with the Crusaders.

As anxious as I was to get the answers I felt I deserved, I was not in any hurry for the inevitable conflict with Michelle. I tried to tell myself that whatever was happening now did nothing to invalidate what Michelle had done for me before, but I still tended to get past, present, and future all tangled into a knot of unresolved feelings.

As we headed downstairs, I glanced into the workroom. "Um, Sweetie, hold up."

"Something wrong?" Sweetie said as I wandered inside.

My gaze flicked among the ponyquins. "The dress I had worked on for Bon Bon is gone."

I heard approaching hoof-steps in the hall as I spoke. Rarity stepped inside, smiling. "That's because the dress is back with Bon Bon."

I turned towards her. "Huh? I thought she said she had traded that one in."

"Yes, she had, but apparently when she saw the wonderful work you did on it, she wanted it back," said Rarity. "Seems it has a bit of nostalgic value to her. Something concerning her friendship with Lyra."

I wished I had never suspected Lyra in the first place. I still felt the urge to apologize to her.

"See, Candy?" Sweetie Belle said. "It might be worth trying to fix your dress after all."

"Oh, indeed," said Rarity. "Especially if you wish it only for the memories."

I forced a small smile. I supposed that's all it really was good for now. I had hoped to wear it again before the summer was out, perhaps at Cranky and Matilda's wedding. Rarity would likely be beside herself if I attended a wedding in a patched dress. "We were going to head over to Sweet Apple Acres."

Rarity stepped up to me. "Before you do, please stop by Twilight's castle. She wishes to speak with you."

My tail flicked. "Um, okay."

Sweetie smiled. "Maybe that means Zecora has another potion for you. You might get to talk to your friend Cherry again."

"Yeah, I just might," I said in a strained voice. "I'll catch up with you later, Sweetie."

Twilight levitated the same book that she had shown me the other day while she had contemplated my request for a new body for Michelle. She cast her subdued gaze on the ancient text for another moment before she spoke. "This journal belonged to a pony named Far Seer. He was a unicorn mage who had a limited ability to see the future. He was a student of Starswirl's, and then later in life, a very good friend."

"Did it give you some clue as to what Starswirl's intentions were concerning the pendant?" I supposed that was my roundabout way to bring the conversation back to my request. I glanced down at my pendant, Twilight's privacy shield glowing around it.

She opened the book to a page near the middle. "Let me read you this. I'll translate the archaic tongue into colloquial: Starswirl has been tense and restless this last fortnight. I know not how he will react to the news I must break to him. With his recent obsession over how life and spirit operate within the continuum of Equestrian magic, I fear this will only add to his burden and raise him from despair to anger. Yet I do not feel right about keeping this from him. I cannot even bring myself to write about what I have foreseen, as shattered as this vision has left me. Yet he will be the one shattered if I do not inform him in time."

She flipped though the remaining pages. They were all blank. "That was his last entry?" I asked.

Twilight closed the book and lowered it. "Yes. This was written right before Starswirl went on his supposed sabbatical during which he created the pendant. I checked the archives. Far Seer disappeared soon after that and was never seen again."

My eyes widened. "They have no idea what happened to him?"

Twilight set the book down gently. "Far Seer spent much time researching unusual magical practices, so his travels took him to exotic and untamed areas. Where he had close calls before, it was assumed he had met his end that way. But the entries leading up to this one chronicle Starswirl's growing interest in defining the essence of spirit and how it relates to life and magic. The pendant was not a spur-of-the-moment project. He had carefully planned it for some time, and Far Seer was the only one he ever told."

"And you think Far Seer saw something bad in the future, and he wanted to warn Starswirl about it?"

"That's what the entry implies. Unfortunately, with no more record of what happened, I can only guess."

I swallowed hard. I could guess as well. I had once equated Michelle's situation as incarceration. That seemed even more apt if this avatar was controlling her somehow, preventing her from telling the truth.

"There's something else," Twilight said in a cautious tone. "There is changeling magic infused into the pendant."

"Wait, what??" I cried. "Are you sure?"

"Despite the fact that I was unable to defeat Sevfivtoo, my battle with her furthered my knowledge of her magic. I re-examined my notes on the pendant, and I can definitely see the signature of changeling magic now."

"But what exactly does that mean?" I demanded.

Twilight started pacing. "I'm not sure myself. It could be lingering contamination from Chrysalis' spell. Or some ambient changeling magic was drawn in when the pendant was created, since his lab was so close to the badlands. Or it could've been purposely integrated into the thaumic matrix, which could be precisely why he chose that location for his lab."

"I don't particularly like that last option."

"Neither do I, as it raises even more questions about Starswirl's ultimate purpose."

I shivered. "And ... there isn't a possibility that it means changelings are in the pendant?"

"No," Twilight said firmly. "There are only two entities in the pendant and neither are changelings. I'm sure of that."

"What about Wuntusix?" I asked. "Does she know anything?"

Twilight sighed. "I tried interrogating her. I can't get her to tell me anything. Maybe it's my imagination, but she seems almost ... despondent. I'm going to ask Kevin if he could talk to her." She turned to face me. "But in the meantime, we can try to find some answers ourselves."

My heart thumped. "Zecora has a new potion ready?"

"Yes, for both of us." Twilight stepped up to me. "Candy, I'm willing to do this alone if--"

I frowned. "No, I'm doing this. I need to talk to Cherry."

Zecora stepped out from behind the cauldron. She gestured with a fore-hoof towards a shelf. "I have created the potion anew, and now it is balanced for two."

I slid my gaze towards two flasks which sat bubbling with the same fizzy potion as I had taken before. I remembered not knowing quite what to feel, or what I would see. My anxiety was no less than it had been then, but for vastly different reasons.

Twilight smiled. "I'm impressed that you were able to adapt it so fast."

"As much as I like the fame," said Zecora. "The pendant is more to blame."

I stared at her. "Huh?"

"I assumed going in was easy, but coming out was not; thus of my effort spent, the latter consumed quite a lot. But through my research I have come to know that the pendant itself ensures a smooth flow."

"I'm not sure I follow," I said.

Twilight stepped up to me. "I think what she means is that the pendant is allowing spirit energy to flow smoothly both in and out. When she crafted the potion, she had to ensure that you wouldn't get somehow partially stuck in the pendant. It seems she didn't need to worry about that as much."

"But Cherry could already do that," I said. "She appeared to me in the White Tail Woods."

"Yes, but she required an infusion of energy for that, or so she claimed." Twilight frowned. "But if the pendant already allows energy to flow both ways easily, then something is not adding up."

To me the implication was clear: Starswirl had indeed intended to create a new body and project a spirit into it. As much as I burned to plead my case to Twilight again, we had to do this first. I grabbed one of the flasks in my magic and drew it towards me. "Well, let's go ask them."

Twilight levitated the other flask towards her. "I'll need to start the spell first." She lowered her head. The privacy shield dissipated, and the pendant again suffused the room with bright golden light. She raised her head and drew the flask close. "Ready?"

"Ready," I said.

We drank our potions at the same time.

I again felt dislocated as the world went stark white and robbed of my sense of self let alone another presence beside me. When the veil faded to reveal a new reality, I recoiled and almost stumbled. Instead of green grass under my feet, I found hard stone, walls rising to a high, vaulted ceiling. Only when I heard the echoing clop of hooves beside me did I realize I was not alone.

"This is exactly like from my dream," said Twilight in an awed voice.

Twilight had spoken Equestrian, and I had understood it even in this form. I turned my head and encountered my second surprise, which Twilight mirrored when she turned towards me and gasped, her pupils shrinking as she beheld me. "Wow, I didn't realize you were so tall in your original form!"

I giggled. Twilight did look rather small. Her head came up to about my stomach. "I thought you knew that from what you saw in Zecora's cauldron."

"I didn't quite have a sense of scale." She smiled. "I wish I could take this opportunity to learn more, but we have a task to accomplish. Though didn't you tell me you arrived outside last time?"

"I did, which is why I'm a little worried." I looked around. Large banners festooned the far wall, all bearing the visage of Starswirl the Bearded. Doors led off to other corridors, all blocked by iron gates.

Twilight frowned. "I don't like this. When I visited this place in my dream, I was able to go anywhere in the castle I pleased."

We both flinched when a male voice suddenly reverberated through the chamber, "That is because thou art not as welcome here as before! Dost thou always intrude upon the private space of others with no advance warning?!"

As my heart raced, Twilight took a step forward, raising her head high. "Only a few days ago, I rescued an innocent filly from a would-be changeling queen, events that you helped set in motion! I have every right to be here and to demand answers!"

After a pause, the voice continued in a softer tone, but no less overbearing. "We are grateful for thine assistance and are happy no harm hath come to thy foal friend. Canst thou not leave further matters alone? Thou hast only one task, to help the one thou callest Cherry to manifest and aid in thine efforts."

"I don't like being dictated to by the mere impression of a great wizard," declared Twilight.

"Mere impression?!" the voice roared, and my heart leaped into my throat when the ground shook. "An Alicorn Princess thou mayest be, but that is no reason to think of thee as my better. I have all the knowledge and wisdom of the original Starswirl at the time I was incorporated into this artifact."

I saw Twilight visibly relax as she turned to me and said in a soft voice, "At least that confirms that this is indeed just an avatar." She looked forward and raised her voice. "You claim to be like the Starswirl of old, but you have none of his kindness or willingness to make new friends!"

"Thou hast no right to make such claims. Thou assumest too much. Thou cannot--"

A new voice suddenly intruded, and I gasped. "Starswirl, please, enough! Thou art not helping matters any!"

"Michelle, is that you?!" I called out.

Twilight gave me a confused look. "What was that you just spoke?"

Only then did I realize I had lapsed into English. "Oh, um, sorry," I said in Equestrian. "Apparently I know both languages in this form."

I heard Starswirl sigh. "Child, please, quiet. Thou dost not understand--"

"Thou shalt not call me 'child'," Michelle said in a bitter voice. "In Twilight Sparkle, thou art dealing with an Equestrian Princess, equal in stature to the Princesses of the Sun and the Moon. She and my friend deserveth respect."

My heart thundered. Should I feel elated that Michelle could stand up for herself against Starswirl, or worried that he would summon his wrath upon her?

"Let me talk to them," said Michelle.

Another sigh. "Very well," said Starswirl in a stiff voice.

Metal slid against stone as one of the gates slid open. My heart skipped a beat as Michelle strode towards us. She stopped before Twilight and curtsied. "My apologies, Princess Twilight Sparkle." She turned towards me and smiled faintly. "It is good to see thee again. Sorry to subject thee to archaic speech once more."

I smiled faintly. It did sound rather amusing coming from her.

"Do you always speak for Starswirl's avatar?" Twilight asked in a curt voice.

"He prefereth not to be referred to as an avatar," said Michelle.

"At the moment, I don't care," Twilight snapped. "No offense, Cherry, but I would prefer to speak with him directly."

"Princess, he hath confided in me everything he knoweth. I speak for both of us."

"Then maybe you know about Far Seer," said Twilight.

Michelle paused, her eyes flicking back to me. "Princess, perhaps thou shouldst let Candy speaketh first. I am sure she hath much she wisheth to ask of me."

"Maybe I do," I said in a shaky voice. "But if it's Starswirl who's driving everything, why can't he speak to us too?"

Michelle dipped her head slightly, a lock of hair falling over one eye, and she averted her gaze for a moment. I indeed had a question, but I was unsure I could bring myself to voice it. "Candy, I know thee well enough to understand when thou hast a burning question. Thou shouldst speak it now."

As charming as archaic Equestrian could be, it also had the annoying tendency to make every suggestion sound like a damn command. "Fine! I'll ask it! Are you colluding with the fucking changelings?!"

For that one word, I had lapsed into English. Twilight's pupils shrank as she likely realized that not only had she learned her first word of English, but it was a curse word.

Michelle gave me a hurt look. "Thou wouldst think that of me?"

I clenched my hands into fists. "Stop it. You always did this. Whenever you didn't want to answer a question, you instead asked one in return."

"Then I will answer," Michelle said. "I did not, nor would I ever collude with those creatures."

"Then why does the pendant have--?"

I stopped when I felt Twilight jab me in the side with her wing. She turned towards Michelle. "I want to believe you, Cherry, but when you drained energy from the shield spell just to appear to Candy in her dream right before the train back from Canterlot was attacked, I can't help but be suspicious."

"It forced thee to find another way to protect Candy without relying on something that could be bypassed," said Michelle.

"That was the reason?" I cried. "You couldn't just come out and tell us, 'oh, by the way, using the pendant as a focus for the spell is a bad idea'?! Why did you have to resort to this?"

Michelle looked at Twilight. "Wouldst thou have believed it if I had done as she suggesteth?'

"I don't know," said Twilight in a neutral voice. "But you were taking a huge gamble that I'd change my strategy, and frankly I don't like being manipulated like that."

My heart sank. "Wait, that means you knew something like this would happen! You knew the changelings were working together, and you did nothing?!"

Michelle remained quiet for a long moment. She raised her head and slowly brushed the lock of hair from her eyes. Her gaze flicked between the two of us before settling on Twilight. "Princess, thou knowest Sevfivtoo must be stopped, correct?"

"Yes, and I intend to do everything in my power to see that happen," said Twilight in a firm voice.

I refused to let Michelle ignore me. "Answer my question! You did know that something was going to happen, didn't you?"

Michelle nodded without looking at me. "But it was inevitable, given Sevfivtoo's wish to obtain the pendant."

"And just why does she want the pendant?" Twilight asked.

"Thou hast already determined this by thy conversation with the changeling Kevin," said Michelle. "To cast a spell upon it and use it to absorb the energy she needeth to Ascend."

"Except that she can't," said Twilight.

I stared at her. "Huh?"

A smug expression crossed Twilight's muzzle. "Ever since we've arrived, I've been studying the magic patterns here. This conjured universe is so compact I can sense the thaumic weave, and I've come to the conclusion that Sevfivtoo has a chicken-and-the-egg problem. She needs to utilize the pendant as Chrysalis attempted to do to gain enough energy to Ascend, but only an already Ascended Queen with Chrysalis' power can cast such a spell."

I gasped. "Twilight, a-are you sure?"

"Positive," said Twilight. "Only after entering the pendant myself did I realize I had barely scratched the surface of its complexity. Even I would have trouble crafting a spell to do what Chrysalis had attempted, and she likely had over a year to prepare."

I turned towards Michelle. "Did you know this?"

Michelle smiled faintly. "No, I did not. It is good news. It means Sevfivtoo hath no true means to Ascend, even with the pendant. Perhaps protecting the pendant needeth not be a concern anymore, and thou canst relieve thyself of the burden."

"You're not serious!" I cried. "You mean just give the pendant to her?"

"Or thou canst bait her into taking it after arranging a suitable trap."

"Aren't you forgetting a little detail? Like the fact that you're still stuck in the pendant?!"

Michelle sighed. "Candy, I cannot ever forget that."

"Cherry, I refuse to do anything which will jeopardize your safety," said Twilight. "While I don't yet fully understand what it means to be a disembodied spirit, I have to assume you are indeed alive in some way."

Michelle smiled more fully, but it remained subdued. "I thank thee for the consideration, even if it is misplaced."

I stomped up to Michelle. "You don't get it, do you? This isn't about protecting me or some stupid artifact anymore, this is about protecting you! I want to get you out of here even more than ever now!"

"Candy, we discussed this."

"No, we didn't discuss anything! You tried to tell me what to do!"

"I only told thee the limitations of--"

"Let Twilight figure that out!"

"Candy, Cherry, enough," Twilight declared. "I have a feeling I know what you're talking about, and that's not where I want to go right now."

It took all my will not to explode at her. Why shouldn't we talk about it? Why shouldn't we find out everything that this avatar of Starswirl knows about the real wizard's research? I didn't want to believe that Twilight had already dismissed the possibility of crafting a body for Michelle.

"Cherry, I want to talk to Starswirl's avatar," said Twilight.

"What dost thou wish to know?" Michelle said.

"No, I'm not playing that game. You ignored the first question I asked, and we went off on a tangent."

Starswirl's voice suddenly reverberated through the room. "And didst thou not receive valuable information concerning the pendant?"

"Then give me more!" Twilight shouted. "Tell me what the name Far Seer means to you! What is it he foresaw that he felt the need to warn Starswirl about? Did it indeed have to do with his research?"

"It mattereth not!" the avatar thundered. "All thine efforts must be focused upon stopping Sevfivtoo! Thou dost not want to delay until extreme measures are all we have remaining!"

"Starswirl, please, stop," Michelle said in a barely audible voice.

I narrowed my eyes. "What did he mean by that?"

Twilight stepped up to me. "Candy, we don't have much time left. The potion will run out soon."

"May I make a suggestion?" said Michelle.

Twilight sighed. "Fine. What is it?"

"If thou wouldst focus on helping me manifest as I wish, I would be of more help."

"Only if I get to talk to the avatar," said Twilight. "And he'll actually answer my questions."

"I will speak with him."

"I've heard that before," I muttered.

Michelle stepped up to me. "Before thou leavest, may I speak with thee alone?"

My heart lurched. Having her stand this close to me, despite all my suspicions and doubts, instilled a sense of calm familiarity. I could still believe things could go back to the way they once were.

I glanced at Twilight. She nodded once and stepped away.

When Michelle next spoke, she lapsed back into English. "Rachel, you need to trust me."

"You realize how hard it is for me to do that anymore?" I cried. I wiped my eyes. "And h-how much it hurt to say that?"

"Right now, nothing is more important than ending the threat of Sevfivtoo."

"Then give us what we need to know! Stop being so secretive!"

"Rachel, there is nothing more Twilight needs to know about this pendant or about Starswirl's research for her to stop Sevfivtoo," said Michelle.

I wanted to believe her, but something still nagged at me. Michelle had always been very good with words, always crafting her advice such that I might not realize their full implication until the right moment. I had always admired her for that, but now I felt as if she were using it to manipulate us.

I had no words that would express how much I still loved her despite feeling so frustrated with her. I drew her into a hug in hopes of reminding her how much she still meant to me. As she hugged me in return, I whispered in her ear in a quavering voice, "You're still not being straight with me, Michelle. You're still hiding something from me."

Michelle uttered a long, soft sigh as she tightened the embrace. "I don't want you to be hurt any more than you already have been."

"You're hurting me right now by not being honest with me."

Michelle pulled back enough to meet my gaze. Her eyes seemed cloudy, as if she had suddenly lost that spark that made her seem so alive despite being only a spirit. "You need to let go, Rachel."

My eyes widened. "Of what?"

"Of your worries over me. Of the past. Of everything that ever hurt you. Just look towards the future."

My jaw tightened, and I frowned. "You want me to just forget you? I'm already worried over forgetting about my own mother, and now--!"

Michelle suddenly backed away from me. I had not noticed that everything had begun fading to white. I had held out some hope that I could reconnect with her, but she seemed ever more determined to drive a wedge between us.

She faded and vanished into the white, and the next thing I knew, I was again sitting in Zecora's place back in my pony body.

"Well, that could've gone better," Twilight said.

I took a deep breath to calm my tumultuous emotions before standing up. "I'm sorry if I messed things up, Twilight."

Twilight stepped up to me and reapplied the privacy shield around the pendant. "You did nothing of the sort, Candy. The avatar was right in that we did gain some knowledge about the pendant. Perhaps more than he had intended to divulge."

"So is the pendant really useless to Sevfivtoo?" I asked hopefully.

"At least with respect to how we assumed she would use it. But then why does Sevfivtoo want the pendant?"

Zecora stepped up to us and raised a hoof towards the pendant. "If your original theory has worn thin, then perhaps you now need to look within."

I glanced down at it. "She wants something inside of it? The avatar?" My head snapped up, and I swallowed hard. "Not Cherry!"

"More likely she wants the avatar, and Cherry is unfortunately along for the ride," said Twilight. "Perhaps she plans to coerce some sort of knowledge from him." She glanced at the pendant before meeting my gaze. "Candy, it appears you're going to get at least part of what you wanted."

My mouth dropped open. "Y-you mean you're actually going to try to create...?"

"I'm going to try to complete Starswirl's research," Twilight said firmly. "Where exactly that will lead me, I don't know yet."

"Twilight Sparkle, are you sure this is the path you wish to tread?" said Zecora in a somber voice. "That you truly wish to explore the mysteries of life and death?"

"You make it sound like this is necromancy," Twilight said. "That's not what this is about. That's not at all what I sensed."

"Sensed?" I asked.

Twilight smiled. "The avatar has quite underestimated me. In drawing us into the castle, he meant to intimidate us, but he also brought me closer to the core of the thaumic matrix, and I understand it better now. I think I can continue his research at least enough to see where he was going."

I knew Twilight was stopping short of claiming she could grant Michelle a new life, but I held out hope anyway. If Michelle could be removed safely from the pendant, we could both finally put this whole sordid mess behind us. Then the pendant could die a fiery death for all I cared.

"But it also revealed something else," said Twilight, and my heart fluttered. "The changeling magic I detected is not there by accident. Starswirl had specifically woven it into the thaumic matrix. That's why I stopped you when it looked like you were about to ask about it. I had already determined that and didn't want the avatar to know."

I swallowed hard. "Twilight ... d-does this mean Cherry was lying when she--"

"No, I think she was telling the truth when she denied colluding with changelings, but it's not the whole story."

"What about helping her manifest?"

"I'm still not sure of the relationship between the energy I impart and her ability to appear outside the pendant, but I'll go along with it for now." Twilight's eyes narrowed. "And I just might be able to get the avatar to appear to me as well, whether he likes it or not."

Zecora stepped forward. "I will assist, though I fear the risk is quite high. Because in truth, there is more here than meets the eye."

Zecora had echoed my own worry, that we were about to embark into truly uncharted territory. My foolish hope of straightening everything out in one conversation had been dashed. Perhaps in a way Michelle had been right. I did need to let go.

Just not in the way she had intended.

Jump to top

Chapter 37 - Confrontations

I stomped a hoof. "Oh, come on! I'm not some little foal who wandered in off the street! It's not like I'm going to be scared by the big, bad changeling!"

The bulky, light brown earth stallion who served as the sheriff of Ponyville set down his newspaper and gave me a tired look. "Miss Swirl, it ain't got nothin' to do with whether you're gonna be scared or not. Rules are rules."

"I'm sixteen. Almost seventeen!"

He raised a hoof and tipped his hat back slightly, fixing his stern eyes on me as he sighed. "Now, math ain't my forte, Miss, but I'm pretty sure both those numbers are below eighteen, an' that makes you underage. Underage visitors gotta be accompanied by a parent or guardian."

I frowned. "They obviously didn't have that rule in Appleloosa when the Crusaders 'visited' Troubleshoes."

The sheriff smirked. "An' now you know why we have that rule now. Miss Applejack suggested it herself."

I face-hoofed. "Of course she did. Thanks a lot, girls," I muttered.

"What was that, Miss?"

I lowered my hoof with a loud clop. "Never mind."

"Honest to Celestia, Miss, not sure why you wanna visit that critter anyway," the stallion drawled. "Even Princess Twilight couldn't get nothin' outta it."

The knee-jerk reaction was to get answers; if neither Michelle nor the infernal avatar would tell me anything, maybe the changeling would. Even as my blood boiled at the idea of seeing it again, I had to try, even if I feared it would devolve into me simply venting and screaming at it.

"Miss, why don't you just go talk to your parents about it?" said the sheriff.

I stiffened. I couldn't even bring myself to raise the topic to Rarity, and I suspected she was avoiding it. I shuddered when I remembered the tone of her voice when it appeared I had been slamming Sweetie Belle herself against the tree.

Did she think I was a monster and just didn't want to dwell on it? Was she hoping she could ignore it? Or did she think my behavior was okay because it was only a mere changeling I was trying to beat to a pulp? Somehow that prospect disturbed me the most.

"Miss?"

"Yeah, fine, okay," I grunted. I spun around. "Thanks for your time."

I stomped out. I looked down at my pendant and frowned. It still glowed in a privacy shield which Twilight maintained at my insistence. If Michelle was going to be that secretive, then two could play at that game.

As the sheriff's office fell behind me, I slowed and sighed. Again, my internal debate over what was right to feel towards Rarity refused to quiet down. Maybe this would be easier if I could finally resolve that.

As I wallowed in my own indecision, two voices drifted towards me. I paid little attention until they were loud enough that I recognized one. "--is not just some stupid obsession, Bon Bon, okay? I'm not crazy for wanting to know for sure!"

I turned my head at the sound of Lyra's voice. She and her friend were trotting down the street before me. Bon Bon rolled her eyes and sighed. "Lyra, I didn't mean that I think you're crazy."

"It sure sounded that way earlier."

"You're reading too much into what I said," Bon Bon declared. "And if anypony knows anything about chasing down things that are elusive, it would be me."

Lyra tilted her head as they slowed to a stop. "Huh?"

"Er, never mind," Bon Bon said quickly. "I'm just worried you're stressing out over this too much."

"Why wouldn't I, after what happened in the castle?" Lyra snapped.

"You might be reading too much into that, too."

Lyra lowered her voice and flicked her gaze about. "Look, there's a reason you're the only one I confided in. If anypony else found out, I--" Her gaze fell squarely on me. "Um ... ah ..."

Bon Bon gave her a puzzled look before following her friend's gaze. "Oh! Hello, Candy. Lyra, this is the filly I told you about who--"

"Yes," Lyra said in a cool voice. "We've met."

Great. Somepony probably told her. "Lyra, I'm sorry I ever suspected you were the changeling," I blurted.

Bon Bon's pupils shrank. "That was you?"

"Yeah, and if I had it to do over again, I would've taken another minute to actually think and--"

"It's okay, Candy, really," Lyra said in a more contrite voice. "Honestly, I'm not sure what happened on that train."

I had my own ideas. Obviously her memory had been messed with like the Crusaders' had. My guess was that she saw Sevfivtoo and Wuntusix outside the window headed for the last car just before the train stopped, and they altered her memory to make her a suspect.

Bon Bon slowly smiled. "Well, then, I'd say that Candy more than made up for it in the work she did on the dress."

Lyra smirked. "If you ever show it to me."

"I'm waiting for an appropriate moment. The anniversary of when we first met is coming up soon."

That might have seemed an odd thing to celebrate if I hadn't remembered down to the hour when I had first met Michelle. Not that we specifically celebrated it, but I supposed I did in my own head without realizing it. "Well, I need to get going."

"Oh, Candy, we were about to go to lunch," said Bon Bon. "Would you like to join us?"

Shit, I had forgotten. I had accepted an invitation to have lunch with Applejack's family. I had not expected to get side-tracked. "Oh, um, thanks, but you just reminded me, I already have a lunch date. I'll see you later."

"Bye, Candy," Bon Bon called out as I turned and galloped away.

"Yeah, see you," said Lyra's quickly fading voice.

I picked up my hooves carefully as Apple Bloom led me to a far corner of an orchard that I would never have guessed was part of Sweet Apple Acres. Had she not explained to me that this particular part of the farm had been left fallow, I would have been more shocked at the wild state of the trees, not to mention the thick underbrush.

"Jus' a l'il further, Candy," Apple Bloom said. Many of the trees had become so overgrown that their canopies merged, and only occasional, mottled sunlight illuminated the way. I might have lost her if it weren't for her big red bow.

"Where exactly are we going?" I said, my tone sounding distressingly like a kid intoning "are we there yet?"

"Right here!" Apple Bloom proclaimed as we stepped into a clearing.

In the center was ... an apple tree. Wow, big surprise. It did sit off on its own, however, and the sunlight gleamed from the skin of its fruit, as healthy and ripe as I might find on any other tree on the farm.

I turned my gaze from the tree. "So where is this reminder Sweetie Belle mentioned?"

Apple Bloom chuckled. "Ya were starin' right at it!" She trotted up to the tree and placed a hoof on its trunk, looking up lovingly into its branches. "This here tree is it."

I tilted my head as I approached. "A tree? Did something happen here?"

"Ya could say that. What color are the apples?"

I lifted my head. "Red. No, wait, some are green." I blinked. "Wait a minute ... is this some trick of the light? That one looks like ..."

Apple Bloom turned and gave the trunk a light buck. A few apples tumbled out of the tree. I levitated the nearest one before my eyes and turned it, my mouth falling open. The apple was exactly half red and half green.

"Betcha never saw apples like that before," Apple Bloom said.

The same could be said for a lot of things since I arrived in Equestria, but even by local standards this seemed odd. "So what gives? Some sort of magical apple?"

Apple Bloom's gaze glistened as she stepped up to me. "I guess in a way it is. Applejack showed me this here tree on the night she was gonna go fight Nightmare Moon. Said it was planted by my parents."

I stopped turning the apple around and looked at her. "They planted magical apples? How come they didn't do that everywhere?"

Apple Bloom moved into the shade of the tree and sat down. "Well, they kinda didn't mean it ta turn out that way," she said as I joined her. "See, as Applejack tells it, our parents had a big row when it came time ta plant this particular orchard. Mom wanted green apples. Dad wanted red."

I put down the apple I was still levitating. "But I've seen both red and green apples here."

Apple Bloom smiled. "Only 'cuz of this tree. They couldn't settle the argument, so each planted a single seed right here. One red, one green. Whichever grew best and bore fruit would decide it." She picked up the apple I had set down and held it in her fore-hooves. "Instead, they got this. They almost never argued 'bout nothin' ever again."

I said nothing, and simply stared at the apple.

"I didn't want Applejack ta go, so she showed me this ta try to explain ta me what she needed ta do," said Apple Bloom in a soft voice. "This tree woulda died if we had eternal night. I mean, yeah, lots of worse things woulda happened, but I kinda wasn't thinkin' about that. So Applejack had ta make it sound like she was protectin' this memory of our parents."

I swallowed hard. Maybe this had been a bad idea from the start. How was I supposed to explain to her that Earth was not the magic fairy land where friendship and love can create magic? "And you still have the tree," I said in a low voice.

"Yeah, I got the tree," said Apple Bloom. "But ya know somethin'? I don't need it."

I stared at her. "But you just said--"

"I said I did need it. Back then. An' I still don't wanna lose it. But if I did, I'd be sad fer a while, sure. But nothin' can take away my memories of 'em. Dontcha have good memories of yer Mom?"

I plucked the apple from her hooves in my magic and stared at it again. For a moment, the colors were not red and green, but black and white. My ninth birthday. Back then, my favorite flavors were vanilla and chocolate. My mother kept asking me which flavor I wanted for my ice cream and cake for my party and I simply could not decide. She had the caterers make everything both vanilla and chocolate swirled together.

It was a trivial memory, nothing compared to magically creating a tree to serve as a memorial to sustain me while somepony went off to do a heroic deed. Nor was she simply catering to a spoiled brat, as I would have been content with either flavor. But it was a memory, and a good one. It made me smile, even as tears welled up in my eyes.

Apple Bloom touched a fore-hoof to me. "Candy? Are ya okay?"

I took a deep breath as I returned the apple to her. "Can you tell me one more thing? You ever look to somepony else as a mother or father?"

Apple Bloom remained quiet for a long moment. "Can you keep a secret, Candy?"

"Of course."

"There was somepony. A very kind mare who was a good friend of the family. She don't live in Ponyville no more, but ... she was a lot like my Mom, an' she was doin' her best ta help us out when my parents passed on. I kinda wished I coulda called her 'Mom'."

"Why didn't you?"

"Didn't seem right. She wasn't lookin' ta do that fer us. An' I had a big family I was close ta, and we were all there fer each other." She paused. "But I know not everypony's that lucky."

I remained silent. My thoughts churned through all those years after my mother's death when all I had for family was an aunt who saw her responsibility to me as no more than a task to execute at best and a burden at worst. Michelle had become surrogate family for me. Just her, not even her parents, as she had not been on the best of terms with them. Perhaps that's why my recent row with her hurt so much. I felt like I had tossed my only remaining family to the curb.

"But ya are now!" Apple Bloom said.

I blinked. "Huh?"

"Well, ya got Rarity and Sweetie Belle. An' when ya meet their parents, I'm sure they'll like ya, too."

I actually smiled. Children always thought the world was so simple. Maybe it was. Maybe only adults complicated it. I was not even an adult yet, and I struggled to find the same simplicity that Apple Bloom had just nailed.

Would my birth mother have thought I was a bad person for what I had done? That was easy to answer: never. Would Rarity think I was a bad person? I wanted to answer the same. I almost could.

Perhaps I was looking for some greater power to step in and decide for me, or for Rarity to impose her will. It didn't work that way, and I had already rebelled against the latter. I had to let Rarity be my mother.

I rose to my hooves. "You know what, Apple Bloom? You're right. I am lucky. Sometimes I just get kind of blind to that."

Apple Bloom smiled and stood. "We should get back ta the house. Lunch is prob'ly ready by now."

I smiled. "Sure, I'd love to."

Rarity sighed as she cleaned up her work area, several items floating through the air glowing with her magic. "Honestly, Candy, I wish you would forget this idea."

I lent my own magic to the effort without even thinking. "I'm not getting answers fast enough. I have to know more, and I feel like there's not a lot of time left."

Rarity turned to me. "Time left before what?"

I had not expected that question. I paused to set some spools of thread away before replying. "Well ... time left before something happens."

"Like what?"

Was she serious? "I don't know! Before Sevfivtoo makes another move, maybe?"

Did Rarity look relieved? What did she think I was going to say? "Candy, I really think you should let Twilight handle this."

"Why?" I demanded.

"Why not?"

"That's not an answer!"

"Please, don't raise your voice to me, there's no need."

"This is something I feel I have to do," I declared. "I have to confront it."

Rarity looked away as she lifted several bolts of fabric onto a high shelf. "Haven't you already 'confronted' it enough?"

My heart pounded. "You think I just want to go beat it up again?"

Rarity paused. "No, Candy, I don't."

I swallowed. "You sure? You really sure of that?"

Rarity turned towards me. "I am. But I'm not sure you are."

I gave her a pained look. "Please, don't ... don't talk like Fluttershy. If I want that, I'll go to her."

"I just think maybe she can handle this better than me."

My eyes misted. I took a deep, quavering breath. "You don't mean that. You can't mean that."

Rarity gave me a look that was part concern and part confusion. "I only mean you've built up a rapport with her concerning this. I only want what's best for you. I ... I don't want to give you bad advice for such a sensitive topic."

I found it too easy to descend into the "I'm a monster" role and remain in a circle of pity that would go nowhere. What both her and Fluttershy were telling me was right, that in the end all that mattered was what I thought of myself. Yet I still felt this was a wedge between us somehow. "So how sensitive was it for you when you saw me beating up what looked like Sweetie Belle?"

"That's not a fair question to ask," Rarity said in a low voice.

"Why not?! You were horrified!"

"I didn't know what was happening!" Rarity cried. "Of course I was upset!"

"You've barely even talked about it since then."

"I didn't want to upset you. I didn't ... I didn't want you to get the wrong idea."

I stared. "Wrong idea?? What are you talking about?"

Only then did I realize Rarity was trembling. "I just ... I wanted to ... Candy, maybe you should tell me something. Why are you coming to me with this?"

My heart fluttered. The words were just there. I didn't have to force them, I only had to speak them. "Why wouldn't I? You're my mother, aren't you?"

For a very quiet moment, she simply stared at me. Suddenly, her eyes welled up, and she threw her fore-legs around me, hugging me more tightly than I ever remembered her doing. My own tears let loose, and we simply stood there for a long moment.

"Candy, I-I'm so sorry," Rarity whispered.

"Sorry for what?" I said in a shaky voice, sniffling once. "You didn't do anything wrong. I was the one who took so long to--"

"I don't mean that." Rarity drew back enough so she could look into my eyes. "Perhaps this sounds rather odd, but I don't know how else to put it. For the last few weeks, I wasn't sure how much of a mother I should be to you. When this arrangement first started, I controlled your life far too much."

"Well, yeah, but we got past that," I said as we slowly broke off the embrace.

"We did, but I never wanted to make that mistake again." She smiled. "As much as I sympathize with your continued plight concerning the pendant and your friend, it's been an utter delight to watch you slowly becoming more confident, more mature, more--"

I held up a hoof. "Whoa, wait, are we talking about the same pony?"

Rarity raised an eyebrow.

I gave her a tiny smile. "Okay, yeah, maybe I have matured a little, but I got a huge way to go."

"And I didn't want to get in the way of that," said Rarity. "When you spoke of not enough time left, I feared you referred to your time in Equestria."

My eyes widened. "Really?"

"It's a decision you eventually need to make, and as much as I would like you to stay, I cannot risk imposing my wishes on you. Thus my dilemma was compounded."

My eyes misted.

Rarity sighed. "When I brought Sweetie Belle to the hospital that day, I felt very guilty about leaving you to fend for yourself. I knew Fluttershy would be there for you, but I was unsure of what my role should be."

"Well, I admit, I did miss you," I said in a soft voice. "But I wasn't upset with you."

"So perhaps you understand now why I avoided the issue. It meant me adopting the role more deeply than perhaps you were ready for. I didn't feel I could just be your mother. You had to--"

I grinned. "To let you be my mother."

"Yes, exactly."

I ran a hoof through my mane. "Well ... I am. I want to. I mean ... look, I may not call you 'Mom' for a while yet. Just too many emotions wrapped up in that term, you know? But it's what I'm starting to think. And I guess it's what I really need right now."

Rarity drew me into another hug. "Which, of course, means we need to settle the matter of you wanting to confront this changeling again. I'm a bit torn as to what to tell you."

"How about 'yes'?" I suggested.

She broke off the hug and gave me another raised eyebrow.

"Can I at least consider that a 'maybe'?"

"Candy, I'm not at all sure levity is called for here."

I looked her in the eye. "Please, give it to me straight. Are you afraid I'm going to go crazy again?"

"No," Rarity replied without hesitation. "But I'm afraid you'll be hurt for no good reason."

"Uh, how to you figure that?"

"You either won't get any answers at all, or you'll hear something you're not ready for."

I instinctively frowned and tensed at the last part of her response, and I suddenly understood what she had meant about not knowing how much of a mother to be. "To be honest, I have a bad feeling that's going to happen eventually regardless."

Rarity sighed. "You may be right. Perhaps we should seize the chance where I can be there for you."

I could almost hear Rarity bristle as we stepped into the room in the back of the sheriff's office and peered at the little black creature that lay huddled in a far corner of the cell. The metal bars shimmered slightly, and when I drew close, I sensed a faint tingle of magic.

"Don't get too close, Miss," said the sheriff. "Bars got an enchantment on 'em. Might give you a bit of a shock if you touch 'em."

I nodded without taking my eyes from the changeling. The surge of rage I had feared would accompany this moment failed to materialize. All I had was the undifferentiated hatred I had for changelings in general, and even that did not leave me frothing at the mouth or instill a desire for exacting justice from it.

"And you're sure that thing cannot get out?" Rarity asked.

"Positive, ma'am," the sheriff drawled. "Princess Twilight herself cast the spell. Not that the critter's shown any sign of wantin' to do much of anythin'."

"Hey," I called out.

The creature remained still, lying on its belly, its wings twitching occasionally. Its head rested on its fore-hooves, turned away from me.

I frowned. "Hey! I'm talking to you!"

The changeling shuddered once and was still again.

"Wuntusix!" I yelled. "Stop ignoring me!"

"Easy, dear," Rarity said in a soft voice.

The changeling shuddered again. It slowly turned its head towards me, and I steeled myself. Again, I saw nothing of what I had seen in Sevfivtoo. No cold gaze of heartless calculation peered back. What I had thought might be indifference looked more like resignation. It stared at me for a long moment, finally prompting me to say, "I'm not going away until you tell me what I want to know."

Slowly the creature rose to its hooves, only to fall back on its haunches and remain in the corner. It turned its faintly glowing pupil-less eyes towards me. "I meant what I said before," it said in a quavering voice that made its weird dual-frequency nature even more pronounced. "I never tried to drain you."

"I don't care what you were trying to do," I snapped. "That's not what I was going to ask you. I want to know what's going on! What does Sevfivtoo want? How do I get that monster to leave me alone?!"

"Miss? You okay?" the sheriff said, and I heard him take a step towards me.

"It's all right," said Rarity as she stepped up to me, laying a hoof on my shoulder. "I'll handle this. You need not worry yourself."

The changeling cast its gaze at the floor. "I don't know what Sev wants anymore."

"Liar," I snapped.

"I really don't, but I wish I did."

I stomped a hoof. "Stop lying to me! How can you not know? You're working for her!"

The changeling raised its head and looked at me. "I was supposed to be working for Queen Chrysalis and for the hive."

My jaw tightened. "Yeah, I'm sure that justifies killing somepony, huh?"

"That wasn't my choice to make."

I started to pace alongside the bars. "Yeah, sure, nice defense. Just following orders. That what you were doing when you helped capture Strong Wing? He's lucky Sweetie Belle stumbled on your camp."

The changeling's eyes widened. "Is ... is that pony okay?"

I frowned. "Huh? What do you care?"

"Please, tell me! Is he okay?"

I stared, nonplussed. "Well, yeah, last I heard, he was going to recover."

The creature nodded once. "Sweetie Belle didn't stumble on it. I dispelled the illusion so she'd find it."

Rarity gasped and stepped forward. "You lured her in there?!"

"No!" the changeling cried. "I mean ... it's not what you're thinking."

"I'm thinking you came close to replacing her then!" I yelled.

"That wasn't what I was trying to do!" the changeling pleaded. "I was trying to get Strong Wing rescued."

"And I'm supposed to believe that?!" I bellowed. "You later replaced Sweetie Belle anyway, and she was left at Sevfivtoo's mercy!"

"S-Sev wouldn't have drained her," the changeling said in a shaky voice. "She was s-supposed to be for me."

Rarity made a disgusted noise.

"And how is that better?!" I exclaimed.

"Because I wouldn't drain her!" the changeling cried. "I ... I tried to do the same for your friend. I tried to get Sev to let me appear as you and get her to peacefully hand over the pendant."

"Uh-huh," I muttered. "Sure. You know so much about what you supposedly wanted to do, and yet you won't tell us what Sevfivtoo really wants."

"Because I don't know!" the creature screeched, setting my teeth on edge. "After the summit, Queen Chrysalis banished Sev from the hive because she had killed. I think she got it in her head then to be a rival to our Queen. Or maybe she's been planning it for a while, I don't know. And I don't know why she still wants the pendant even after the Queen banished her."

I exchanged a look with Rarity. "I would be very judicious in what you choose to reveal, Candy," she said. "Perhaps further discussion should wait until Twilight can be summoned."

"Now you see why I didn't say anything to the Princess," said the creature in a softer voice. "I had nothing to tell her that she didn't already know, and I ... um ..." It cast its gaze downward again. "And nothing I can say will change my fate."

I had no idea what it meant and had no interest in pursuing it. I assumed it meant some sort of trial or judgment would take place. I truly was no longer interested in taking out my frustrations on this creature.

The changeling sighed and turned away. "Please, just leave me alone. Nothing I can say will help."

My instinct was to accuse it of lying again to protect its partner, but I quelled it before the words could reach my lips. I closed my eyes and lay a hoof on my pendant. "Do you even care that your partner left my friend with no body?"

After a pause, I heard the changeling say in a confused voice, "No body?"

I clenched my teeth and whirled around to face it. "It wasn't good enough that I had to watch her die!" I yelled. "Now her spirit is trapped in the pendant! It's almost worse than dying!"

The changeling's mouth fell open. "H-her spirit is inside the pendant??"

"What, you didn't know?"

"No, I didn't. All I knew was that the avatar of Starswirl the Bearded was within."

Rarity stepped forward. "What about Sevfivtoo? Does she know?"

The changeling swallowed hard. "I-I don't know. Maybe."

I narrowed my eyes. "More likely she knows and doesn't care. She killed my friend once, why not a second time, right? Chrysalis didn't care, either! She even tried to use the pendant when she briefly got hold of it!"

The changeling cringed. "I don't think the Queen knew, either, or she would've changed her strategy. She would've found a way to take advantage of the situation."

I felt a chill radiate down my spine, and I shivered hard. Rarity drew close and said, "Wuntusix, explain yourself. What did you mean by that?"

The changeling remained silent, its gaze darting.

"Answer her!" I bellowed.

The changeling swallowed hard. "Y-you're asking me to betray--"

"I'm asking you to help protect my friend!" I cried. "You keep claiming you never wanted to see anypony killed. You implied you didn't agree with how Sevfivtoo was doing things. Fine! Prove it! Tell us what we need to know!"

The changeling's jaw trembled. "I-I guess it doesn't matter now. Queen Chrysalis first found out about the pendant before the invasion of Canterlot when some drones found the ruins of a lab belonging to Starswirl the Bearded. She found where he had hidden his journals and learned everything he knew about the pendant. She also found where the pendant had been hidden, but it had already been plundered a long time ago. She wanted to use the pendant to further her control over Equestria once she conquered Canterlot, but abandoned that idea when she found the pendant was gone. Only after the invasion failed did she become obsessed with finding it."

"I had wondered why Chrysalis never bothered with us in all that time," said Rarity. "I suppose she was too busy pursuing this idea."

"Who sent it to Earth?" I demanded. "Who started this in the first place?"

"If our Queen knew, she never shared that information with me," said the changeling. "She didn't tell me very much about it at all. Most of what I know I learned from Sev. I doubted she told me everything she knew."

"Did she tell you anything about how the pendant worked or what it's purpose was?"

"Only what you likely already know, that it can draw in and contain a spirit."

I sighed. Another dead end.

"You still didn't answer the question," said Rarity in a stern voice. "How would Chrysalis have taken advantage of this situation?"

"I'm not sure," the creature said. "All I know is that spirit energy is very different from magical energy. I doubt even our Queen understood it completely. If she had known a spirit resided in the pendant, she would've wanted to study it."

My heart thundered. I could not stop trembling even after Rarity wrapped a fore-leg around me and drew me close. My throat tightened, but I forced the words out. "Are you saying Sevfivtoo wants the pendant because Cherry's spirit is inside it??"

The changeling's wings drooped. "I can't think of any other reason. I-I'm sorry."

For just a moment, I wanted to show how much I appreciated its apology by throwing it a few times against the far wall of the cell. Instead, I clenched my teeth until my jaw ached and the urge passed.

"Candy, we need to talk to Twilight at once," Rarity said.

I glared at the changeling. It just looked sadly back. "So why didn't you tell Twilight all of this?" I demanded.

"I didn't know your friend's spirit was in the pendant."

"And what difference does that make?!"

The changeling shivered. "We've b-been brought to the edge of ruin. But Sev could push us over into the abyss."

"Huh?"

The changeling turned away. "It doesn't matter. You wouldn't understand. Or care."

I had the urge to toss it again, but out of frustration rather than rage. Rarity tugged at me and said, "You're not going to get anything more out of it. We need to go."

"Fine," I muttered as I turned away.

Brink of ruin? Heading into the abyss? I had no intention of letting anything like that happen. Maybe the changeling had a fatalistic outlook, but I refused to give into it. I had finally started to get my head screwed on straight, and I saw a chance at a decent life. I had no intention of letting it slip away.

I might even want to actually stay in Equestria after all.

Jump to top

Chapter 38 - A Friendship Strained

Apple Bloom turned away from the door with a smile and stepped off the front porch. "An' that's the last one. Nice job, Crusaders!"

I smiled as I stood off to the side, now empty saddlebags draped around my barrel.

"Wow, who knew there were so many sick ponies in town?" Sweetie Belle said.

"Yeah, but we got to them all!" Scootaloo said.

Apple Bloom trotted over. "Yeah, once Candy suggested we not make 'em so dang big they can't fit through the mail slot, we got through the rest real fast."

To be honest, I had made that suggestion mostly to spare us exposure to other ponies' germs. "You really did do a good job on them, girls."

"Yep, we gotta be like the best get-well-card makers in Ponyville," said Scootaloo.

The three fillies exchanged glances, then looked at their flanks.

"Um, sorry, but I didn't see any cutie marks appear," I said.

They then looked at my flank.

"And I'm pretty sure this is not my special talent, either."

"Oh, well," said Sweetie Belle with a sigh. "Cross another thing off the list."

"Y'know, I was thinkin'," said Apple Bloom.

That was never a good sign.

"We got all them things we tried that never got us cutie marks, but there's nothin' sayin' that one of 'em can't be what Candy is good at."

"Hey, yeah, you're right," Scootaloo said. "We should have her try all of them!"

I sighed and face-hoofed. "Girls, really, you don't need to worry about me."

"I'm kinda with Candy on this one," said Sweetie Belle. "Besides, she's been getting better at fashion stuff. Rarity has her doing alterations now."

Scootaloo tilted her head. "Can you get a cutie mark in that?"

"I don't see why not," said Apple Bloom. "But what do ya think it'd look like?"

"Scissors cutting cloth, maybe?" Sweetie suggested.

While I didn't obsess over cutie marks like they did, I did sometimes wonder how I would attain one. Would it be in fashion or something else? Maybe one for alterations wouldn't be particularly flashy, but I had yet to hear anypony complain about what they got.

Apple Bloom smiled. "Hey, mebbe that's somethin' we can try ta get a cutie mark in: figgerin' out what other ponies' cutie marks could look like!"

That was a little too meta for me, but at least it was something relatively safe.

Scootaloo glanced at my flank again. "I'm kinda surprised Candy doesn't have one after the other day."

I blinked. "Er, huh?"

She smiled. "When you beat up that changeling that was impersonating Sweetie Belle!"

"Wait, what? How did you know about ..." I trailed off and looked at Sweetie Belle.

"It wasn't me!" Sweetie cried. "I kept it quiet like you wanted me to."

"Wow, Candy, didya really beat up that changelin'?" Apple Bloom said. "Applejack didn't tell me nothin' 'bout that!"

I frowned. "I'm not particularly proud of it."

"But that musta been some nice magic. Or did ya use yer bare hooves?"

"I heard she actually picked up the changeling with magic," said Scootaloo.

"Wow! That's neat!" said Apple Bloom. "Even Sweetie Belle took longer ta get ta where she could pick up stuff that big."

Sweetie Belle sighed. "Not helping."

I turned to Scootaloo. "Who told you all this?"

Scootaloo grinned. "I heard it from Rainbow Dash."

"Rainbow Dash? She's back in town?"

"Yeah, she and Pinkie Pie got back last night. I talked to her this morning before I came over to the clubhouse."

Sweetie Belle glanced at me and said in a soft voice, "Sorry about this."

"Not your fault," I said. I turned back to Scootaloo. "Do you know where she is now?"

"When I saw her, she was heading for Twilight's castle," said Scootaloo.

"Thanks." I turned towards the others. "Girls, if we're done, I got some other stuff I need to do."

As I approached the castle, I dropped from a gallop to a trot when I saw Twilight heading down the front walk, Rainbow Dash hovering to one side and Pinkie Pie bouncing along the other. I took a deep breath that did nothing to calm me as I drew close.

"--still can't believe that you fought a changeling queen, Candy beat up her minion, and I wasn't there to see it!" Rainbow's voice drifted to me as I marched up to them.

"Not really a full Queen," said Twilight. "Kevin called her a Queenling. She still needs to Ascend."

Rainbow waved a hoof. "Whatever you call it, it's still a big bug and you squashed it."

"I wish I could say I had, but ..." Twilight turned her gaze towards me. "Oh, hello, Candy, I was just coming to get you."

I halted with a sharp clop of hooves. Before I could speak, Rainbow flew up to me, smiling. "Candy! What you did was so awesome, you gotta tell me all the details!"

"Why?" I said coldly. "You already shot off your own mouth about it."

Rainbow Dash recoiled, pupils shrinking. "What the hay??"

"You told Scootaloo about it."

Rainbow shrugged. "Well, yeah, what's the big deal?"

"Maybe I don't want everypony knowing what I did!"

She stared. "Are you kidding me?"

Twilight sighed. "Rainbow, when I filled you in on what happened last night, I didn't mean for you to go telling everypony about it."

"Twilight, why did you even tell her that detail?" I said, struggling not to yell at her.

"I mentioned it only because I was impressed with your magical ability."

I frowned. "I don't think using it for violence is very impressive."

Twilight stepped up to me. "I didn't mean that at all. I meant your raw magical strength is quite good. It means you can assist in helping your friend manifest."

Pinkie Pie bounced. "Oo, does that mean we get to see what Cherry looks like?"

"I gotta admit, I'm kinda curious myself," said Rainbow.

"Only if Candy is willing," said Twilight. "I didn't expect to have an audience."

Rainbow looked at me and rubbed her mane with her hoof. "Um, yeah, maybe I'm not wanted."

I sighed. "I'm sorry I got upset with you."

"Well, it's okay, I just don't know why. I mean, who wouldn't be proud of beating up one of them?"

"Rainbow," Twilight said with a sigh.

"Come on, they're just changelings!"

I had no idea what upset me about this. I should be feeling the same way. What had the changelings ever done for me -- or for anypony in Equestria -- except cause trouble? Yet I could have said the exact same thing about the drug dealers back home, and as much as I may have wanted to, I never acted violent towards them. It wasn't just the threat of retribution that held me back. At least that's what I wanted to believe.

"And it's not like Candy killed it," said Rainbow. "Not with as tough as they are. It's just chilling out in a jail cell."

"I'd rather not talk about that now," said Twilight in a subdued voice. "Let's head inside so we can help Cherry manifest and hopefully get some more answers."

Was Twilight upset over something concerning Wuntusix? The day before, she had expressed some concern that I had talked to it without telling her ahead of time, but she had seemed happy that I got some information out of it. Had something happened in the interim?

Rainbow drifted over to me. "I'm sorry I upset you. I just assumed you'd want your Crusader friends to know. I won't tell anypony else." She paused. "But I do think you need to chill out a little."

She might ultimately be right, but I could not see it then. She at least helped me clarify what upset me. When Michelle's death had prompted me to run away from everything, I had feared that the longer I remained on the streets, the more inured to violence I would become. I never wanted that to happen here.

"Thanks for the advice," I murmured.

Twilight smiled as she trotted towards the center of her lab. "You see, Candy, a unicorn's horn is not just bone. It contains special fibers that help conduct magic. Newborn unicorn foals have a tremendous number of them, but they're wired haphazardly, which is why they're prone to wild surges of magic until the body sort of 'prunes' them back. Later, the unicorn can start to access them again and, by constantly using magic, expand them. Sort of like exercising a muscle to make it stronger."

Rainbow Dash yawned. Pinkie Pie smiled and looked utterly fascinated. I lay someplace in between. "So that wand the doctor used in the hospital was doing something with those fibers?" I asked.

"Exactly," said Twilight. "And yours were perfectly normal. You simply hadn't learned how to access them yet. Once you did, they started growing stronger, which means you can conduct more magic through them. Some spells are still out of your reach because your horn can't conduct that much magic yet. When I temporarily had four alicorns' worth of magic inside me during Tirek's reign, I could use all that magic, but it was ... not very comfortable. It was a bit over the limit of what my horn could conduct. Of course, magical ability is not just about the fibers themselves, or raw power for that matter. It's also how your skills interact with--"

Rainbow started snoring.

"So, what does this have to do with helping Cherry?" I asked.

Twilight rolled her eyes at Rainbow before turning back to me. "If you'll step over here, I'll demonstrate."

I hesitated before trotting over to her. "Um, okay. What do I do?"

"Lower your head just a bit, please," said Twilight. "And hold still."

I did so. She touched the tip of her horn to the base of mine. My horn tingled faintly and suddenly lighted. Off to the side, a book levitated a short distance off a shelf.

"What I'm doing is lifting that book, but using your horn to conduct that magic."

"Woo-hoo, it's tag-team magic!" Pinkie suddenly cried.

Rainbow's eyes fluttered open. "Huh? What? Which team am I on? What are we playing?"

Twilight sighed. She lowered the book and raised her head. "Anyway, that's the general principle. The problem I had in helping Cherry manifest at will was how to channel the magic properly. Now it appears that your horn has matured enough that we can use it for that purpose."

"Won't that mess with my own magic?" I asked.

"Not if you both don't try to use your horn at the same time."

I frowned. "Twilight, I'm not sure I can trust her enough to give her free reign with my horn."

"You won't have to," said Twilight. "Because it won't be under her control. She'll have to ask for your permission to manifest. Only when you agree will the spell activate and conduct its magic through your horn."

"Uhhh, maybe I don't understand all this egghead magic stuff," said Rainbow. "But you sure that avatar can't do something with this?"

"Yeah, you wouldn't want somepony suddenly appearing when Candy's trying to take a shower or use the little filly's room," said Pinkie.

"That's not what I meant, Pinkie."

"Well, it's what I'd be worried about."

"I have to admit, I'm a little nervous, too," I said. "How can you be sure he can't mess with it?"

"The avatar is limited in what it can do," said Twilight. "He may see himself of king of his little domain, but that's as far as his rule extends."

"Unless he uses Candy's horn to break out," muttered Rainbow.

"He can't," Twilight said firmly. "Even if he managed to interface with this spell, he can't simply take control of her horn. All he could do is ask permission, and Candy is free to ignore him." She narrowed her eyes. "And I plan to show him exactly how skilled a magic-user I am."

Rainbow grinned. "It is gonna involve kicking his flank?"

Pinkie smiled. "Are you gonna rip him a new one?"

"In a magical sense, yes," said Twilight.

"I'm in!" said Rainbow.

"Okey-dokey!" said Pinkie.

The whole idea did not sit with me very well. Yet if I refused, and Michelle remained stubborn, and the avatar remained intractable, this would drag on and on. "All right, let's do it."

I held absolutely still, Twilight's head lowered, her eyes closed in concentration. Magic flowed in bright swirls around her horn and into the pendant, which filled the chamber with brilliant golden light. Rainbow shielded her eyes with a hoof, and Pinkie wore sunglasses with heart-shaped lenses.

The glow finally faded as Twilight lifted her head, frowning. "Something's not right. The spell is in place, and I've imparted the necessary energy. Are you still not getting anything, Candy?"

I paused, listened, and shook my head. "Nothing."

"This is really odd. It shouldn't take this much energy."

Rainbow lowered her hoof. "Unless they're trying to trick you again, like they did before."

"But there's no reason to do so now," said Twilight. "We're agreeing to their request."

I glanced down at the pendant and frowned. I lifted it with a hoof and shouted, "This better not be a trick by either one of you! I'm getting tired of ... er ... wait ..."

"What is it?" Twilight said.

I tilted my head. "I thought I heard ..."

A little more energy, please.

The words sounded like a very soft voice right next to my ears. "I-I hear her! It's just really faint. She says she needs a little more energy."

Twilight looked dubious. "Why doesn't she have enough now to ..." She trailed off and sighed. "Never mind. It'll be easier to have her manifest and get the answers we want then."

She poured more magic into the pendant, and it glowed brightly once more. Finally, I heard Michelle's voice again, stronger this time: I thank thee. May I manifest?

I swallowed hard. "Sh-she's good now. She ... she wants to manifest."

Twilight closed her eyes. She held her still-glowing horn to my pendant. "Go ahead and let her, Candy."

"But don't you need to--"

"I'm good as well. Just let her manifest."

I took a deep breath. "Cherry, you can manifest."

My horn blazed, and I nearly flinched at the rush of power through it.

Clouds of light and shadow materialized out of thin air before me, an undifferentiated blob that slowly stretched and whirled. It drew itself into a tight, noiseless vortex, flickering points of light defining the edges of a human form. My throat tightened as it coalesced into the familiar, robed figure I had come to know as my friend.

"Whoa ..." Rainbow breathed as she stared.

Pinkie lowered her glasses. "Ooo, she's tall! Are all of you back in your world that tall, Candy?"

My throat was too tight to speak. She appeared to stand with her feet on the floor, but I could still see through her.

"I can answer that question," Michelle said in her usual soft voice which made me pine for seeing her again in the flesh. "Thou art correct, most people of my world haveth this height."

Rainbow tilted her head. "Uhhh, why are you talking all weird like Luna used to?"

"It is archaic Equestrian. It is what Starswirl's avatar knoweth, thus he teacheth me the same." Michelle turned around. "Princess, thou needest not impart any further energy into--"

"GOTCHA!" Twilight cried, jerking her head away from the pendant.

My horn blazed again, and I staggered back.

A second glowing form now coalesced next to the image of Michelle. My heart thumped as it took on a more decidedly quadrupedal shape. Light flickered along its materializing form, until there stood a gray unicorn stallion with a long beard, his coat a bit shaggy, a pointed hat perched atop his head, and a robe swaddling his barrel and hindquarters.

The image of Starswirl the Bearded gave Twilight a cross look. "That was uncalled for, Princess."

His voice was not nearly as deep and nowhere near as intimidating as it had been in the potion-induced vision of the castle. I suddenly felt like Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz uncovering the wizard's grand deception.

Twilight blinked and stared, her mouth dropping open. Thankfully, it took her only a few seconds to quell any possible fanfilly urge, and she met the avatar with a stern gaze of her own. "What's uncalled for is you refusing to talk to us. You forced me to take this action."

"Thou realizest I can simply demanifest and return to the pendant?"

"I know perfectly well you can," said Twilight. "But if you have any of the real Starswirl's personality, you'll accept when you've been bested and pay your worthy opponent the respect she is due."

The avatar narrowed his eyes. "Thou seemeth to know much about Starswirl."

Rainbow Dash laughed. "Oh, Celestia, does she ever! She's got you beat here, pal. Don't even try to fool her."

"Even if thou dost, it mattereth not!" the image of Starswirl said. "The pendant is still rightfully my domain."

I stepped forward. "Maybe it is your domain, but it sure as hay is intruding on mine. Like it has been ever since my mother gave it to me."

Twilight stepped over to me and placed a hoof on my shoulder. "I know you're upset, Candy, but please, let me handle this."

"Thou hast nothing to 'handle' here," the avatar said.

"Starswirl, I beg of thee," said Michelle. "See this from their perspective."

The avatar turned to her. "I shan't divulge the mechanisms of the pendant to this alicorn regardless of her saddlebag of tricks!"

"Frankly, I don't care about that right now," said Twilight, which made my heart flutter until she added, "I can figure it out myself without your help."

"So thou claimest," the avatar murmured.

"What I care about now is defeating Sevfivtoo."

Rainbow Dash flew up. "Really, Twi, do we need this two-bit bearded ghost for that? We can hunt down Sevfivtoo and go all rainbow power on her flank!"

"We need to find her first," Twilight said. "Or find a way to lure her in. She knows we'd be a match for her until she's Ascended and has had time to build up her power."

"And we're not using the pendant as bait!" I cried.

Michelle turned to me. "What if thou hast no choice? Sevfivtoo will remaineth elusive until she can striketh on her own terms."

I glanced at Twilight.

She nodded to me. "Go ahead and tell her what Wuntusix said, Candy."

Michelle's eyes widened slightly, and the avatar's gaze darted to the side and narrowed. I took a deep breath. "Cherry, listen to me. It's possible that what Sevfivtoo wants is not the pendant itself but ... but you."

Michelle's lips parted for a moment, and she averted her gaze. When she looked at me again, I saw not the fear or worry I expected, but something more akin to resignation.

My mouth dropped open. "Wait ... did ... did you know this already?"

"I have suspected as such," said Michelle in a flat voice.

"And you didn't think to say anything? Are you insane?!"

"I'm with Candy on this one," said Rainbow. "You're crazy for keeping this from us."

"What difference doth it make?" said Michelle. "The end result is the same. Sevfivtoo wanteth the pendant."

"But that means you made your suggestion about baiting Sevfivtoo with the pendant when you knew it was you she wanted!" I cried. "What's the matter with you? You have a death wish or something?!"

Michelle gave me a level look. "In a way, I already am dead, Candy."

I stomped a hoof. "That's not what I mean! And that's not what you were saying when we first talked. You said you felt like you were still alive in some way."

"I'm getting confused!" Pinkie said. "Is she alive or dead?"

The avatar frowned at Twilight. "There is no confusion, as this is not a matter which should ever be explored. This pendant should never hath been created!"

Rainbow rolled her eyes. "Um, excuse me, oh loud and bearded one. That's kinda not the point because, well, it's right there!"

"All right, that's enough," Twilight said. She leveled her gaze at Starswirl and Michelle. "I want a straight answer from you two right now. Where did all that extra energy I imparted into the pendant go?"

"The spell for my manifestation needeth it," said Michelle.

"Surely thou understandest at least that much," muttered the avatar.

"Wrong," Twilight declared. "Stop treating me like I'm a first year magic student. I was willing to buy that at first, but while you've maintained your manifestations, I've been analyzing the magic flow. You're using a fraction of what I gave you." She turned fully to Michelle. "And that also means that you didn't need all of that energy you had me impart into the pendant to appear to Candy in the White Tail Woods. What were you planning to do with that energy? What are you planning?"

I stared at Twilight, eyes wide, my heart pounding. "Cherry, what does she mean? What's going on?"

The avatar's gaze became cloudy as he looked at Michelle. Michelle bowed her head, a lock of hair falling over one eye. She brushed it aside as her gaze flickered towards me, as if she had trouble meeting my eyes. "It mattereth not if thy friends can stoppeth Sevfivtoo."

Rainbow threw up her fore-hooves. "This is getting us nowhere! Let's just find that bug ourselves and squash it!"

"I want my question answered first," Twilight said. She turned to the avatar. "When we visited your realm, you said something about defeating Sevfivtoo before 'extreme measures' were needed. What did you mean by that?"

"I do not recall saying that," the avatar muttered.

"You liar!" I snapped. "I remember that, too!"

"Well, what about it?" Twilight said. "Is that what the energy you hoarded is all about?"

The avatar said nothing for a long moment, and his eyes shimmered, his expression softening a touch. He slid his gaze over to Michelle.

My heart fluttered. I gave Michelle a stricken look, not even daring to breathe. Yet again, my friend had presented me with another unthinkable idea, and I trembled with the fear that I might be right.

Michelle refused to respond. Damn her. Damn her. She was going to make me say it. "You intend to s-sacrifice yourself, don't you?"

Pinkie gasped, her mouth falling open.

"Wait, what?!" Rainbow cried. She turned to Michelle. "Are you out of your mind?!"

"But how can you even do that?" Pinkie squeaked. She reached into her mane and slammed the pith helmet onto her head. "You're going to turn the pendant into a bomb?!"

My heart thundered so hard I could hear it trying to beat its way out of my chest.

"No, they can't," said Twilight.

"And what dost thou know about what can or cannot be done with the pendant?" the avatar scoffed.

Twilight clenched her teeth and marched up to the visage of Starswirl. "I've had it with your condescending attitude!" She flared her wings. "You think these are clip-on? Rainbow is right, I do know a great deal about Starswirl, and you are no Starswirl, no matter how much you look like him. You have none of his patience, none of his understanding, and certainly none of his kindness!"

The avatar frowned, but his face appeared robbed of its former anger. He cast a listless gaze at Twilight as he said in a lower voice, "Perhaps, Princess, if thou wouldst remove thy blinders and cease to place thy hero on a pedestal, thou mayest realize that even the greatest of ponies have their lowest point. Perhaps Starswirl hath reached his when he createth me."

Twilight recoiled as if slapped. The avatar vanished in a flash of light.

Pinkie gave Twilight a sad look. "Starswirly isn't coming back, is he?"

"We don't need him!" Rainbow said. "He's never gonna give us any answers."

I marched up to Michelle. "But you are! Tell me right now! Was I right? Are you intending some stupid self-sacrifice?"

Michelle lowered her head and remained silent, and for a heart-stopping moment I thought she was going to simply disappear rather than answer my question.

I heard soft hoof-beats. I turned my head and blinked when I saw Pinkie Pie approach. She cast a sad gaze at Michelle. "A-are you really going to do that, Cherry?"

Michelle opened her mouth, her lower lip quivering, but closed it without saying a word.

"Because I think Candy would really miss you."

My eyes teared up. I swallowed hard and looked away.

"M-Maybe if I throw you a 'Welcome to Equestria' party like I did for Candy, would that convince you to stay?"

I heard a quavering sigh. I wiped my eyes and lifted my gaze to Michelle's face. She took a deep breath and raised her head, looking at nopony in particular. "I th-thank thee, Miss Pinkamena Pie." Her lips twitched into a small smile. "I shall consider it."

"I don't understand this, Cherry," said Twilight. "How could you possibly use the pendant to defeat Sevfivtoo? I was right in what I said before. The thaumic matrix of the pendant is far too stable to be used as a magical explosive, nor can its function be modified without powerful external magic. I just don't see how you could possibly use the energy I gave you in a destructive manner."

Michelle turned her head. "Perhaps thou art correct, and it was a foolish notion."

"You're lying to us again," I declared in a shaky voice. "You're not the kind to do things without thinking them through. What are you not telling us?"

Rainbow Dash folded her forelegs and frowned at Michelle. "Seriously, Cherry, doesn't your friendship to Candy mean anything to you?"

"It meaneth a great deal to me, Miss Dash," said Michelle in a solemn voice.

"You have a strange way of showing it!" I cried.

"Cherry, why does Sevfivtoo want you?" said Twilight.

Michelle remained silent.

I stepped closer to her and gazed up into her eyes. "P-Please let us help you. Like you helped me so many times."

Michelle closed her eyes. "Thou dost not understand. I cannot betray my promise to Starswirl."

"Why the hay not?!" Rainbow snapped. "He's just a grumpy old ghost! You don't owe him anything!"

"I owe him my continued existence."

"An existence you seem to hate now," I said, my eyes misting.

She turned to me, and a tiny hint of a smile played on her lips. "I cannot hate it, as it allowed me to save thy life."

I opened my mouth, but my throat was too tight to speak. What was I supposed to say to that? What was I supposed to feel? I had already run through a gamut of emotions, all except for grief, and now I felt like I had to prepare myself for that as well. Again.

Michelle uttered another deep sigh. "I have caused enough pain. I will return to the pendant and manifest again when emotions hath settled. I will see thee later, Candy. Please ... be well."

She faded and disappeared. I fell back on my haunches and lowered my head but refused to cry. I felt a foreleg wrap around me as Pinkie drew me into hug.

Twilight stepped up to me and lowered her head to reapply the privacy shield on the pendant. My voice cracked as I struggled to retain my composure. "Twilight, w-we can't let her do this! We can't let her k-kill herself just to take out Sevfivtoo!"

"For the moment, you have control over her manifestations," said Twilight. "You can keep her in the pendant. That gives us some time."

I trembled. All this time I wanted her out of the pendant, and now I had little choice but to keep her a prisoner. She had substituted one jailer for another.

"But if you do let her manifest, I'm not sure how far she can project herself."

"Then let's go get that stupid bug and end this!" Rainbow exclaimed.

Twilight raised her head and sighed. "I'd love to, but Sevfivtoo is gone."

"Gone?? What the hay does that mean?"

"It means I can't find her anywhere near Ponyville," said Twilight in a tired voice. "The wards aren't detecting her anymore. I even rotated the resonances in case she had found a way to camouflage herself. She's moved off somewhere, and she's out of our reach."

I took a deep breath. I told myself repeatedly that I was in control now; I could keep Michelle from doing something foolish. But why would she so willingly give me the keys to her kingdom unless she had some way around it?

Somehow, despite how much this had torn me up inside, I had a flash of inspiration. "T-Twilight, I just thought of something. What Cherry said about a promise to Starswirl. That had to do with the true purpose of the pendant, right? Because that's the one thing he refuses to talk about."

Twilight nodded. "Good thinking, Candy. That had crossed my mind as well, and it's a valuable clue. And I worked out another piece of the puzzle. I believe I know where Starswirl's lab was located."

My eyes widened. "You do? How did you manage that?"

She smiled. "The location Starswirl emulated in the pendant is not a random conjuration. While searching for the avatar to force it to manifest, I got to see all of it. I recognize it from some of my historical readings. It's a small valley just north of the badlands." Her smile faded slightly. "The only problem is, the location is at least several days travel for me, and I don't want to be away from Ponyville in case Sevfivtoo comes back."

"Betcha I could get there fast!" Rainbow declared.

"I know you can, but we need somepony there who knows unicorn magic. And I don't want any of us to be away from Ponyville in case that's exactly what Sevfivtoo is hoping for."

"What about the other Princesses?" Pinkie said.

"That's really our only choice right now," said Twilight. "I need to know what's at those ruins, if anything. I'll have Spike send a letter to Canterlot at once. Then I'll get back to work on figuring out Starswirl's research. I feel I'm really close now."

I could not just sit by and let events run their course. For now, I had some control, but I couldn't count on that lasting forever. The pendant was mine, regardless of what that damn avatar had to say about it, and Michelle was my friend. That made both my responsibility; I needed to stop running away from it before time ran out.

But I needed something more to go on. Only one being had ever given me any barest hint of information that actually proved valuable in the end, the very one who had catapulted me into this strange world in the first place.

From chaos, somehow, I had to find order.

Author's Note

Next update will be 6/20 (delayed a day due to family stuff over the weekend)

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Chapter 39 - Playing The Game

I entered the room in the back of the boutique which had been designated as my work area to find five dresses sitting in a row on hangers. I had been up only an hour, and already I had enough work to keep me busy for the morning. I glanced at the calendar and frowned. Of course, all this work would just happen to come in today.

One needed a hem realigned. One needed additional accessories. Two needed to be taken in a bit in the hindquarters. The fifth was my own project: I was finally going to try patching my damaged dress.

I glanced at the calendar again as Rarity trotted into the room. "Candy, I need to head to the marketplace. I shouldn't be gone--"

I whirled around to face her. "I'll go!"

Rarity glanced at the dresses. "You appear to already have a sizable amount of work, and I expect you'll have more orders to do later."

"I can get it done, no problem."

"Really, I do appreciate you wanting to help, but--"

"It's no big deal!" I said. "I mean, I could use some fresh air and sunshine."

"It's raining, dear."

"Oh. Well ... I like rain."

Rarity narrowed her eyes. "What are you trying your best not to tell me?"

When Rarity suspected an ulterior motive, I could argue all I wanted and get nowhere. She knew me too well. "Okay, well, I thought I might, um, go visit Fluttershy for a bit."

Rarity smiled. "All you needed to do was say so. But ... wait, today is Tuesday."

"Oh, is it?" I said in what I hoped sounded like a casual voice.

It didn't work. Her smile faded and her voice dropped into a more serious tone. "Candy, what are you planning?"

"Nothing!"

Rarity took a step closer to me. "Let's try this again: why, exactly, do you want to visit Fluttershy when you know Discord will be there?"

"Um, I like the tea Fluttershy serves?" When Rarity simply raised an eyebrow, I rolled my eyes and said, "All right, fine. I want to talk to Discord about something."

Rarity frowned. "And I can guess what."

"Are you really going to stop me? I mean, what harm could it do?"

"Normally I would tell you to discuss this with Twilight, but she's been so utterly immersed in her research that I have yet to see her leave her castle for the past three days. Just what do you hope to accomplish?"

I had no good answer, as I was unsure myself. This was a shot in the dark. Intuition rather than any well-reasoned plan guided me. "Discord gave me hints before, so I thought maybe he'd be willing to share more information with me."

"Discord operates only to his own ends," said Rarity. "And often his own amusement as well. I don't want to see you hurt."

"I know, and I appreciate that, but you can't shelter me all the time."

"Yes, you're right," Rarity said in a reluctant voice.

I wondered if I would have had discussions like this with my birth mother had she lived long enough. I wanted to think so. Perhaps that's why I felt a stronger pull lately to actually start addressing Rarity as "Mom."

"I'll go to the marketplace," said Rarity. "You go to Fluttershy's place and get back here as soon as you can. If I think you're taking too long, I will head over there to ensure Discord hasn't harmed you. I normally trust Fluttershy to keep him under control, but--"

I cut off her words with a hug and said, "Thanks, you're the best! I'll see you later." I rushed towards the front door.

"No galloping inside the boutique!" Rarity called out. "And put your raincoat on!"

I slowed (barely) to a canter. I flung the hall closet door open with magic, levitated the raincoat around me, and burst out of the boutique.

I stopped at the end of the walk and stared at Fluttershy's house as a gentle rain pattered down, wondering not for the first time exactly what I was getting myself into. After I finally approached, I hesitated again. I turned my head and placed an ear to the door. My heart skipped a beat as I heard Discord speaking in an amused tone. "--and that's when I turned and said to her, 'But my dear Celestia, the grass was already purple when I got here!'"

Fluttershy erupted into a fit of giggling. "Oh, Discord! You have such funny stories of when you first met the Princesses. I hope they consider them just as--"

I frowned, drew my head back, and rapped my hoof on the door. I heard Discord approach. "Allow me, my dear." The door opened, and I managed not to flinch as my gaze fell upon the draconequus. His eyes narrowed, and suddenly he was dressed as a butler, standing stiff and formal, casting an imperious gaze at me. "Miss Fluttershy is engaged in an important affair with a dear friend and has no time to entertain solicitors."

"Oh, is there another salespony at the door?" Fluttershy said from inside with a sigh.

"I'm not a solicitor!" I cried. "And I'm actually here to talk to--"

I heard a rush of wing as Fluttershy appeared beside Discord. "Candy??"

Discord lifted his snout in the air and uttered a supercilious sniff. "Shall I eject the riff-raff from your property, Miss Fluttershy?"

"Oh, don't be silly, Discord, Candy is always welcome here." She turned to me and smiled. "Please, come in. Would you like some tea?"

Discord rolled his eyes and slumped slightly as his butler uniform vanished. I stepped warily past him and levitated my raincoat onto the coat rack before following Fluttershy to the table. Fluttershy glanced past me as she set a cup down. "Um, Discord, what are you doing?"

I turned my head. Discord stood frowning, his forelimbs folded. He had shrugged them up so that his normally serpentine body sported shoulders of a sort. A tiny cloud floated above each, causing a miniature snowstorm. "Why not ask Candy here?" he said as snow quickly coated his shoulders. "After all, she gave these to me."

I tilted my head. "I did what?"

"Oh, how soon they forget how they toyed with another's affections!"

"I did nothing of the ... oh, you mean ..." I face-hoofed. "Right, cold shoulder. Ha ha, real funny."

"I'm sure she had perfectly good reasons not to go with you to the Gala, Discord," said Fluttershy as she poured the tea. "But I'm curious, Candy, what brings you here? I know you and he aren't exactly, well, the best of friends."

Discord threw up his arms (which stayed attached this time), the clouds and snow disappearing. "What are you talking about, Fluttershy?" I let out a shocked yelp as he subjected me to an unwanted embrace that lifted me off the floor, my hind-legs flailing. "We're buddies! All that stuff about the Gala is, well ..."

Water suddenly flowed through the room and around us, soaking my fur past my barrel. A stone bridge arched over it.

Fluttershy hovered above the water and uttered a soft sigh. "Discord? Could you not have a stream flowing through my house, please?"

Discord sighed, and water and bridge vanished, leaving my fur dry. He dropped me unceremoniously to the floor, briefly knocking the wind out of me. Fluttershy helped me back onto my hooves. "Hmph," Discord snorted, turning his back to me. "I'm beginning to think I'm just not appreciated."

"I do appreciate you," said Fluttershy. "I just--"

"I don't mean you," Discord said in a cool voice, folding his forelimbs again.

Were Discord's feelings really hurt, or was this just another of his stupid tricks? I had to play along if I wanted to get anywhere. "Fine," I said in a softer but still defiant voice. I took a deep breath. "Thank you, Discord, for saving my life and bringing me to Equestria."

Discord turned towards me, regarding me with a narrow-eyed look as he tapped his chin with a talon. He broke into a wide smile. "See? Now was that hard? You'll get the hang of this friendship stuff yet, Candy. You may even get as good as me at it!"

I wisely held my tongue and instead grabbed the teacup in my magic and took a sip. I nearly dropped it when Discord suddenly appeared at my side, his body half-twined around me.

"But I am curious now, my dear little pony," said Discord in a sly voice. "Just why did you drop by at this particularly auspicious time?"

"Auspicious?" Fluttershy said.

"Well, any time I'm around is auspicious," said Discord.

I should have realized Discord would figure out that I was here to see him. I could not have been more transparent had I been made of glass. I struggled to put the right words together in my head. My mind wanted to follow the impulse to spew the same demand for answers, but this had driven me to my wits' end last time. "I want to know if you have any more information about my pendant and why Sevfivtoo wants it."

"Do you still have an unhealthy obsession with that hunk of jewelry?" Discord said in a tired voice, his paw motioning towards the pendant.

I slapped his paw away. "I'm not the only one with an obsession over it! You were the one looking for it in the first place back on my world."

"He told me he simply wanted to return it to Equestria," said Fluttershy.

"And you believed him?" I blurted without thinking.

Discord snapped his talons. A paper appeared on the table before me titled "Friendship 101 Exam." The rest of the page was a giant, circled letter "F" in red. "And here I had such high hopes for you. Clearly you need some remedial work."

I grabbed the paper in my magic and wadded it into a ball. "Stop it! I don't have time for games!"

"Oh, pish-posh!" Light flashed, and I blinked rapidly as I felt a sense of dislocation. I was no longer at Fluttershy's table, but instead seated a short distance away at a smaller table opposite Discord, a chess board now sitting between us. "There's always time for games." He swept his paw, and pieces appeared.

This was going exactly as I had feared it would, with Discord playing my frustrations like a fiddle. Only Fluttershy's presence prevented me from simply grabbing the board and tossing it aside like some little kid having a tantrum.

Fluttershy trotted up to us. "Um, Discord? Maybe you should listen to her. She's really concerned about her friend and--"

"Now now, Fluttershy," said Discord. "I find there is much to be learned through the simple exercise of playing a friendly game of chess."

I looked down at the board. I had the white pieces. My queen was shaped like Twilight. Images of Celestia, Luna, Rarity, and Fluttershy graced the rooks and bishops. The knights appeared to be royal guards, but I swore one looked like Strong Wing. And the king piece was me, shaped as a human.

I shuddered when I saw that one of the pawns looked like Sweetie Belle, another looked like Michelle, and a third appeared to represent my birth mother. Yet another looked like a changeling. Was that supposed to be Wuntusix? Why was it on my side? The remaining four pawns looked human, but no one I recognized.

I looked at Discord's pieces. His queen was Chrysalis. The king looked like him. One of the rooks was a changeling. From how much bigger it looked than my changeling piece, I assumed it was Sevfivtoo. One of the bishops was Starswirl. Scattered among the ranks of other pieces were more humans, far more seedy-looking than mine.

"Your move, Candy," said Discord with a shark-like smile.

I glanced at Fluttershy, who gave me a resigned look. Great. I had no choice but to play Discord's game. Literally.

In my struggle to remember how the damn game was played, I made some stupid opening moves. I blundered into an attack by one of Discord's human-shaped pieces that took out the pawn which looked like my mother. When he moved his Sevfivtoo rook forward, I tried to keep it tied down, but at the expense of several human-shaped pawns. I managed to threaten it briefly with the Michelle pawn, but this left it open to attack, which Discord seized upon by taking it with the Starswirl bishop. This opened up a hole in my defense, and very soon a rook fashioned like a human had checked my king.

I frowned and sighed. "Let's just forget the whole thing."

"Giving up so soon?" Discord said with a smile.

"Um, Discord?" said Fluttershy. "You kind of have her beaten already."

Discord chuckled. "Oh? Do I?"

The board shimmered. The Starswirl bishop changed from black to white. "Wait, what??" I cried.

"I don't think you're supposed to do that," said Fluttershy.

"Oh, now, my dear Fluttershy," said Discord. "Have you never heard of 'house rules'?"

"Chess is not supposed to have house rules!" I exclaimed.

"Really, Candy, what are you complaining about? Didn't those very same house rules give you a chance to reverse your fortunes?"

I considered resigning or throwing the game. This was no more than an exercise in frustration. I was never very good at this game against ordinary humans, let alone a reality-warping draconequus. Yet the bishop that had now changed sides was in the perfect position to take out the human-shaped rook.

"Go ahead," Discord said. "Do it. You know you want to."

I clenched my teeth. "Fine." I grabbed the Starswirl bishop in my magic and slid it across the board. I hit the rook so hard that it tumbled off the table.

I dropped the bishop in shock when it twisted and shimmied in my grip. It fell over, but promptly picked itself back up. It morphed first into Michelle, who waved at me, and then Discord, who winked and sent a tiny sparkle of magic towards my king. The king morphed from human to pony, and the bishop returned to the shape of Starswirl.

Fluttershy picked up the fallen rook and placed it on the table. "I don't understand what's going on."

Discord smiled and clasped claw and paw together. "Oh, but I'll bet Candy understands now."

My heart thundered. I stared at the piece that Fluttershy had retrieved. It was shaped exactly like the man who had tried to kill me in the alley. I looked again at the board. The game had played out events from my life starting with my mother's death from drugs. The human pawns that the Sevfivtoo rook took out must represent the people it drained.

Discord chuckled. "Now are you so intent on resigning?"

I narrowed my eyes at him. "No. We'll keep playing."

"That's the spirit! Now, I believe it's my move ..."

Discord's next attack was lead by his Chrysalis queen, and once more my ineptness left myself open to being checkmated. Only by recalling how much Princess Luna had helped me did I remember the castling move. I thus castled with the Luna rook and took my king out of danger, then I finally got my Twilight queen out and used her and the Celestia rook to drive back the Chrysalis queen, while at the same time using the Fluttershy and Rarity bishops to help protect my king better. I tried a sacrifice move with the Strong Wing knight, and Discord went for it with his Sevfivtoo rook. It put me in a perfect position to take it out with my Starswirl bishop.

Yet just as I was about to pick up the piece, it suddenly morphed to look like Michelle, and when I attempted the move, the piece would not budge. Discord wagged a talon at me. "Tisk, tisk, Candy. Are you forgetting the basic rules? Rooks can't move diagonally."

"I know that!" I snapped. "This is a bishop!"

"Not anymore, apparently."

"You can't do that!"

"House rules!" he said gleefully.

"That's not house rules, that's cheating!"

Fluttershy cast a troubled gaze at Discord. "Um, I think I agree with Candy."

"Oh, but Fluttershy!" said Discord. "Candy knows perfectly well she can't take out Sevfivtoo quite yet."

I quelled the urge to retort. Perhaps the move I was about to make represented whatever Michelle was really trying to do when she appeared to me in the White Tail Woods. I shivered as I realized how close Michelle may have come to sacrificing herself right then.

Did Discord know? Did he watch the whole thing? Did he place bets on whether Michelle would succeed? Perhaps Sevfivtoo was not the only monster here.

I tried to bring up the Twilight queen to threaten the Sevfivtoo rook, only to completely miss that I had left the Sweetie Belle pawn in danger. Or did Discord somehow make me miss it just so the event happened? Or did I simply stink at the game so much that even with a greater number of strong pieces in play than him that I still had trouble making headway? Discord took it, and my heart pounded as I realized that time represented by the game was rapidly approaching the present.

I sought to attack the Sevfivtoo rook again with the Twilight queen, trying to use the other pieces to block any possible escape routes. When I finally thought I had maneuvered it into a good spot, Discord used his move to cause the tiny horn of the Sevfivtoo rook to glow. It levitated the Sweetie Belle pawn back onto the board, placing it in the way of the attack from my queen.

Before I could rail at this, I spotted an opening. Some of my options had been restricted by Discord's remaining ordinary pieces that he used only to frustrate my offense. I was able to take out one of them with the Rarity bishop without placing her in a threatened position. The Sevfivtoo rook was still trapped. All I had to do to close the trap was get the Sweetie Belle pawn out of the way and move the Fluttershy bishop. Yet it also meant a piece would have to be sacrificed somewhere.

Was that what this was about? Was this Discord's sick way of telling me he was pulling all the strings, and I had to decide who made the sacrifice to bring down the changeling?

"I don't like where this is going," Fluttershy murmured.

"It's all up to Candy now," said Discord. "It's her move."

"This is just a game," I said in a quavering voice. "Right?"

"Isn't everything just a game when you come down to it?"

"Um, that didn't really answer her question," said Fluttershy.

Discord waved his paw. "Oh, stop worrying so much about it. Look, Candy is making a comeback!" He grinned. "In fact ... I think Candy is having just a bit too easy a time of it."

The board shimmered again. I stared as his Chrysalis queen abruptly dematerialized from its square and reappeared on another square, except ... it was no longer Chrysalis. Instead, it was shaped like a question mark.

"What the hay did you just do?!" I snapped.

"Why, I made my move, of course," said Discord.

"That wasn't anything remotely like a legal move! And don't tell me 'house rules' again, I'm not buying it!"

Discord smiled slyly. "It's exactly what it looks like, Candy. It's the unknown. Things yet to come which nopony can predict. Well, most can't, but that's beside the point. What will you do now, Candy?"

In that one move, Discord had shattered my plans by threatening the Fluttershy bishop. I had to move it or it would be taken on Discord's next move. If I could be sure this was really a game, I would simply sacrifice it in hope of reorganizing my attack. Did it make any sense that Discord would allow a game to determine reality even if it meant harming Fluttershy?

In the next few moves, I found a way to pin down Discord's queen, but it meant preoccupying both the Rarity and Fluttershy pieces and having my Twilight queen do double-duty against it and the Sevfivtoo rook. Yet I still could do nothing more than hold things in a stalemate, as afraid as I was of sacrificing any more pieces. Maybe a better player would be able to figure this out, but that simply wasn't me.

Discord had fallen strangely quiet, and when I looked at him, he was frowning slightly. What was he upset about? I doubted I could win this even if I did take out that damn rook. Unless that was what the whole game was about in the first place. I never really sought to attack his king.

I let out a quavering sigh as I realized I had a move that could take out the rook. But ...

"Oh, come now, Candy!" Discord finally said in an irritated voice. "I don't have all day."

"Discord, you're not being fair," said Fluttershy. "Honestly, I wish I knew what the point of this was."

It didn't matter. I made my move. I slid the Michelle rook and placed it next to the Sevfivtoo rook. His only real move was to take my piece. Then I could take his with my queen. If he didn't move it, then the Michelle piece could take it. If he made some other move with the rook, he ran into danger against my other pieces.

When my move was met with only silence, I looked up. Discord stared wide-eyed at the board. He finally frowned at me. "Why did you do that?"

"Huh?"

"Why are you trying to sacrifice that piece?"

Now I really wanted to throw the entire board in his face. "What did you expect? You messed me up completely when you did that stupid illegal move with your queen!"

"But you're not supposed to have to sacrifice a piece!"

"Maybe I didn't have any choice!" I roared. "M-maybe that's exactly what's going to happen. Maybe that's what she was trying to do in the White Tail Woods, and it didn't work for some reason. Don't you know? Isn't that why you made sure to screw up my move by changing the piece?"

Discord's frown deepened.

Fluttershy gasped. "Discord, is this really more than just a game?"

Discord remained silent for a long moment before uttering a grunt and grabbing the ends of the board. He snapped the board closed with such force that I flinched, most of the remaining pieces being crushed flat between the two halves of the board save for three, which bounced and clattered across the floor. "Of course it's just a game," he muttered as the board vanished. He grabbed the table and folded the legs against the top. "What else would it be?" He folded the table top in two.

"Then why are you upset?" Fluttershy asked.

"Upset?" Discord folded the table again. "Me? The life of the party? The king of frivolity?" He folded the table still more. "Surely, you jest."

"What was that game all about?" I demanded. "What did it mean? Why are you so angry?"

"I am not angry about anything!" Discord declared as he folded the table so small it now fit between two talons. He popped it into his mouth and swallowed.

I jumped off the chair. "Look, I came here to get answers! I need to know what to do. If that game is anything like what's going to happen, then you know Cherry is going to try to--"

"Sorry, Candy, I'm fresh out of answers, and the new shipment is on back-order." A door appeared behind him, and he reached for the knob. "Well, I think that about wraps this up! Thank you as always for the tea, Fluttershy, but I need to be on--"

Fluttershy frowned and flew up to him. "You just wait a minute, mister! You're not going anywhere until you tell us what's going on! Candy was already upset when she came here, and you just made her more upset. That's not the way friendship works!"

Discord frowned. "But I ... that is to say ... the game ... but she ..." He sighed and gave Fluttershy a forlorn look. "I'll talk to you a little later." His eyes shifted to me. "Alone."

"Discord, wait!" Fluttershy called out, but the draconequus had already stepped through the door and closed it behind him. When Fluttershy opened it, it led simply to the space beyond it in her house. She sighed and landed. "I'm sorry, Candy. I'll try to talk to him later and see what I can do."

I shook my head. "Never mind, this was a bad idea anyway."

Fluttershy retrieved the three chess pieces scattered over the floor and presented them to me. "Maybe you should keep these. They might mean something."

One was the black queen, still shaped like a question mark. The second was a white pawn shaped like Wuntusix. The third was the white rook shaped like Michelle.

Fluttershy placed a hoof on my shoulder. "Do you need to talk about this?"

I took the chess pieces in my magic. "No, it won't do any good. Just let me know if you get anything out of Discord."

"Either that, or I'll have him talk to you." Fluttershy gave me a hug. "I'll try to get it sorted out, I promise."

I smiled faintly, though I had my doubts as to whether that would be a promise she could keep.

Sweetie Belle poked her head into my work room. "Candy?"

I trotted across the room, levitating several spools of thread. "Hi, Sweetie," I said in a tired voice. I opened a drawer and put the spools back where they belonged. "What's up?"

Sweetie stepped fully inside. "Rarity sent me to tell you dinner will be ready in ten minutes."

"That's fine, I'm just cleaning up." I closed the drawer and levitated a fabric bolt.

Sweetie stepped towards the line of dresses, ten in all. "Wow, did you finish all of them?"

I slid the fabric bolt into its slot before grabbing the next one. "Just barely."

"Wait, this last one looks familiar." Before I could turn around, Sweetie Belle had levitated my dress off the rack. "Oh, cool, you repaired it!"

I put the last bolt away before trotting over to her and taking the dress from her. I sighed as I turned it around so that the repair was more clearly visible. "Still looks like it's patched, though."

"I can barely see the stitching," said Sweetie Belle.

"Yeah, but the color is obviously a little off, and I wasn't able to trim the frayed edges as well as I would've liked."

"Still, it's a nice effort," said Sweetie as I put the dress back. "So, you ready for dinner?"

"Almost. My mane is a bit mussed. I want to give it a quick brushing."

"Okay, I'll let her know."

I watched Sweetie Belle go. I cast one last forlorn look at the dress. It had been a good effort, the best I could do. I had done no less for Bon Bon's dress, though the holes on hers had been a lot less pronounced. I supposed I was expecting miracles where none were to be found. Much like earlier that day.

I headed up to my room and grabbed the brush from the top of the bureau. I was about to head into the bathroom when I glanced at the bookshelf where I had placed the three chess pieces ...

... except now there were four.

"What the hay?" I muttered as I stepped over to it.

The three pieces I remembered bringing home had been joined by a fourth standing between the black question-mark queen and the white Wuntusix pawn, colored gray and shaped like Discord.

As I stared, the piece winked at me. I stumbled back, my eyes wide, the brush clattering to the floor.

The chess piece looked around. "So this is your room?" it asked in Discord's voice. "You disappoint me, Candy. As a teenager, your room should be delightfully messy and disorganized." It turned its head towards the books. "Ah, splendid! No order whatsoever to your filing system. Well done!"

"D-discord?" I said in a soft, quavering voice.

The piece disappeared, only to be replaced by the full-sized version standing next to my bed. He flicked a talon, and my door closed. I opened my mouth, but he narrowed his eyes and said, "Here's an idea: I talk, you listen. Any time we both talk, it always leads to an argument."

I frowned. "That depends on what you have to tell me."

Discord sighed. "Really, how does Rarity put up with your sass? Anyway, you should know that I'm here only as a favor to Fluttershy." He paused and added in a lower voice, "Mostly."

I reminded myself to give Fluttershy a big hug the next time I saw her. "Fine. I'm not even looking for answers anymore because I know you just won't give them to me."

Discord smirked. "Why Candy, I do believe you're back in the running for the annual 'Pony Most Likely To Get A Clue' award!"

"All I'm looking for is a hint. I just need more pieces of the puzzle."

"If it's pieces you want ..." Discord turned and swept an arm towards the shelf. "You have almost all of what you need."

I trotted up to the shelf. "What, the chess pieces? So you did leave them for me?"

"Happenstance left them for you, my dear," said Discord in a silky voice.

"I don't believe you."

"Chaos doesn't require your belief. It simply is."

I stared at the pieces. "But one is still a question mark."

"I told you the piece represents the unknown. Sometimes, the unknown becomes known. Sometimes, what was once known and disregarded is important as well."

I considered. "You mean it's going to change?"

"Stop asking all these infernal questions!" Discord hissed. "You say you won't insist answers be given to you, and yet you do it anyway. Which is it?"

I took a deep breath. I reminded myself that I had to play by his rules or not at all. "Okay, fine, those pieces are important." I looked at the changeling pawn. "Even the color?"

Discord raised an eyebrow and said nothing.

I face-hoofed. "You can't tell me even that?! All right, never mind. Do you have anything else for me?"

Discord gave me a sly smile. "Keep your mind open while your opponent makes a ruckus." He paused. "Or fracas."

"Huh? But that doesn't make any sense!"

"It can, if you're paying attention at the right moment."

I sighed and resisted stomping my hoof in frustration only because I didn't want to draw Rarity's attention.

"I'm counting on you to be more clever than perhaps you're giving yourself credit for." Discord raised a talon and said in a lower, more sinister voice, "Don't disappoint me."

He vanished in a flash of light.

Jump to top

Chapter 40 - Shattered Illusions

A gray pallor settles over a town which appears as if somepony took Ponyville and New York City and mixed them in a blender. I turn a corner and see the boutique. I turn another corner, and the Empire State Building looms over me. I run, and I nearly collide with the front door of Sugarcube Corner. I dash back the other way, and I find myself outside one of the entrances to Central Park.

But the distorted landscape is far less strange than its inhabitants.

They are fashioned like living chess pieces, gesticulating with hands or hooves, depending on species, yet remaining firmly planted to their round bases. The ground is a patchwork of white and black squares that constantly warp and twist. Sometimes I'm allowed to traverse them along their lines, sometimes diagonally, the rules changing with no rhyme or reason. Sometimes the inhabitants slide along these paths as well, usually to block my way out.

And all the while, I hear a familiar, sinister laughter.

I know it's a dream. All my dreams are lucid or semi-lucid anymore, but that gives me no more control over them. If I had any sort of control, I would start appearing as a pony in them.

"Rachel!"

I whirl around. Michelle gestures to me from an alleyway before disappearing within. Is she real, or just something my mind conjured? Is this another attempt to communicate with me?

I dash for the alleyway. A chess piece fashioned like Lyra slides into my path, but I dodge around her, only to be confronted with a Bon Bon piece. I finally get past them and duck between two buildings, a thatched-roof abode on the right and a brick building on the left. Michelle stops at the end of the alleyway and turns to face me, smiling.

"Michelle, what's going on?" I demand. "Do you want to talk to me?"

Michelle giggles. "Of course not. I want to beat you."

I stagger back. "Wh-what??"

Her voice changes. "And now I have." Her body twists to match. "Tisk, tisk, I had such high hopes for you," says Discord.

I utter a frightened yelp and spin around to flee the alley. My heart leaps into my throat when I see another enormous chess piece blocking the way. This one is shaped like Princess Luna, her rear legs frozen in the base, her fore-legs reared up, her teeth bared.

"Game over, Candy," Discord says.

The Luna chess piece turns its head and looks past me. "I beg to differ." Her pedestal shatters as she effortlessly breaks free. A beam of magic erupts from her horn, and Discord explodes into thousands of tiny sparks. "Checkmate."

I swallow hard. "P-Princess? Is that you? The REAL you?"

Luna approaches me. "Yes, it is me. Discord was merely a phantom, but I am not. I wish you to come with me."

"Come with you? But this is a dream, right?"

Luna smiles. "Yes, but I am capable of connecting dreams to one another. I have a vision I need to share." She turns her head, and a door materializes in the brick wall. "Please, follow me."

Bemused, I walk with her, and we stand in the star-filled void I recognize from a previous encounter. To my surprise, Twilight is here. "Hello, Candy," she says as she steps up to me. "Princess Luna visited me first, but when she told me of her vision, I thought you might want to see as well."

"What is it?"

Luna steps forward. "I have found the ruins of Starswirl's lab. It is where I stand right now. I cannot take you there in body, but I can share with you in the dreamscape what my senses behold." She pauses. "But I do warn you. I have found something which may be disturbing."

My heart flutters.

"You can choose to refuse and let Twilight summarize for--"

I shake my head. "No. If it has anything to do with the pendant or my friend, I want to see."

Luna nods once. "Then I will delay no further."

My surroundings shimmer, and I stand in a field of dirt and scrub under the starry vault of the heavens. The moon glows brightly overhead, casting a silvery radiance upon the landscape. Luna turns and raises a hoof. "There."

A great wall rises up, riddled with cracks, edges jagged and crumbling. Beyond it, a broken and listing tower is visible mainly by the stars it blots out. Ruins twist and run in odd lines that cast deep and sinister shadows, and I try not to shiver. Twilight lights her horn, but it does nothing to dispel the gloom.

"Neither of you are truly here," says Luna. "Therefore, your magic will not work. Allow me."

Her horn lights. Now the wall resolves itself to the individual stones, and I see openings, some intentional, some obviously not. Crushed and broken detritus litters the ground.

Twilight steps further into the light. "Somepony cut this place to pieces with powerful magic."

"Likely to break into its hidden chambers," says Luna. "However, some were caused by explosions from within. Starswirl likely left traps for the unwary, and, well, Chrysalis is not known for her subtlety."

"But she somehow caught on and managed to find and retrieve his journals intact."

"Why didn't Starswirl just destroy them if he really didn't want anypony to find them?" I ask.

"Because Starswirl didn't believe in destroying knowledge," Twilight says. "Even knowledge he thought was dangerous. He would hide it, or protect it, or find a pony he could trust with it, but he would never destroy it." She looks to Luna. "Is there anything left at all?"

Luna gestures to us to follow, and we fall into step with her as she trots along the outer wall. "Of the ruins themselves, very little past what you can see," Luna explains. She finds a gap in the ruined wall and leads us through. "Except for this."

We step into what was once a large, round chamber. Only the floor is intact and hints at its original shape. Inscribed upon it are large runes. Are they faintly glowing, or it is simply a trick of the light?

Luna extends her wings and hovers. "Were you truly here, Twilight, you would need to do as I am, and Candy would need to stay clear. These runes still hold ancient magic. It would be unwise to tread upon them."

Twilight steps forward with near reverence. "Some very powerful magic was practiced here," she murmurs in a tone of both awe and trepidation.

"Using your techniques, I confirmed that the same controlled resonance of changeling magic you detected in the pendant also resides here."

"Then I was right. He intentionally incorporated it into the matrix." Twilight pauses. Her face is shadowed, so it is hard for me to tell what expression she wears, but her voice alone is dark enough for me to guess. "This confirms some of my conclusions about the pendant."

I whirl around to face her. "What is it? What did you find out?"

"I'm sorry, but not now," Twilight replies. "This is neither the time nor the place, but come to my castle later in the day, and I may have something to show you."

With great difficulty, I quell an eagerness that is mixed with almost equal parts fear.

"I will be interested if your conclusions are at all affected by what I am about to show you," says Luna in a somber voice. She glides out of the chamber, coming to rest on her hooves in a rectangular room whose walls are nearly intact, save for a fallen pillar.

I step inside and freeze, my heart skipping a beat. A chill radiates down my spine. Twilight comes to an abrupt stop and gasps.

Before us lies a shining stone sarcophagus.

"Oh, no," says Twilight in a barely audible voice. "I-is it ...?"

Luna lowers her horn and brings her light to it. Words are intricately carved into the lid, the shapes very fluid and only vaguely resembling cursive Equestrian.

Twilight sighs and settles on her haunches as she stares. "Oh, dear ..."

"Wh-what is it?" I stammer. "Why can't I read it?"

"Candy, I'm sorry," says Twilight in a distracted voice. "It's written in an older dialect of archaic Equestrian, used mostly for ceremonial purposes. I'll read it aloud." She takes a deep breath and continues in a heavy voice. "Here lies Far Seer, the greatest of friends who deserved more than my failure and false hope. With his indomitable spirit of morality and fairness, he is, by far, a better wizard than I will ever be. May he forgive me for my foolishness." Twilight swallows. "Starswirl must have carved this."

"It does bear his flair for calligraphy," Luna says.

I look from one pony to the other. I have no idea how to react. We knew something happened to Far Seer, but what does this mean?

Twilight rises to her hooves. "Princess Luna, is there any way to tell how he died?"

"Not without a full magical forensics team," says Luna. "This pony has laid here for many centuries. I detect no obvious dark enchantments or curses, but even those may fade with time."

"Do you think Starswirl k-killed him?" I ask.

"I fear we must leave ourselves open to the poss--"

"No," Twilight declares.

Luna approaches her. "Twilight, I know how you feel about Starswirl, but we no longer know what his state of mind was."

"I know, but ... it just doesn't feel right." Twilight pauses. "I've researched Far Seer's travels and shared what I found with Zecora. I told her what I had told Candy, that he supposedly had an interest in unusual magicks. She noticed he visited the ancestral lands of the zebras. They were known largely as 'medicine ponies' back then, offering treatments for unusual ailments. Yet his known magical specialties were conjuration and divination. Why would he be interested in medicine?"

Luna pauses. "Unless ... it was for himself?"

"What if he were looking for a cure for a disease that afflicted him? Maybe what he had foreseen in his last entry was not some terrible act by Starswirl, but his own impending death despite his efforts. Starswirl's interest in the nature of life and spirit had already been sparked by the loss of so many of his friends that the impending loss of Far Seer may have pushed him into doing this."

I give her an incredulous look. "Are you saying he created the pendant to save his friend from dying? That's it??" I know how callous that may have sounded, but I am already barely keeping my emotions at bay.

"It is certainly a more palatable idea than some of the alternatives," says Luna. "But does Far Seer make mention of his illness in his journal?"

Twilight sighs. "That's the problem with my theory. He doesn't. Not a single word."

Luna steps up to Twilight. "I fear I must bring to your attention the runes from the chamber."

Twilight frowns. "Yes, I saw them."

"We must consider all possibilities."

"What is it?" I demand.

Twilight turns and steps into the chamber again. "I've used the term 'magical energy,' but that's really a generic term. There are many forms of magic."

"Well, yeah, I know that! Each of the three pony tribes has a different form of magic. And there are alicorns. And what Zecora does."

"Yes, but there are still many more that we have yet to understand. Life is sometimes said to be a form of magic. And these runes ..." Twilight sweeps a hoof. "... suggest that this chamber could've been used to find a means to convert one form into another."

I look back to the room with the sarcophagus. "What does that mean?"

"It means Chrysalis, thankfully, solved only part of the equation," Twilight explains. "She learned how to manipulate the pendant to channel a particular form of magical energy, but not how to convert one to the other." Twilight frowns. "Which is something I fear Sevfivtoo may have figured out, and may be why she wants Cherry's spirit to complete her Ascension."

Despite being a mere projection in this landscape, my legs feel weak. Sevfivtoo does indeed want to kill Michelle a second time, and in a way far more heinous than simply destroying her mortal body. Luna wraps her wing around me and draws me close. "I am sorry, Candy Swirl," she says in a soft voice. "Perhaps we should not have brought you here."

I shake my head. "No, it's better that I know," I say in a quavering voice.

Twilight steps over to us. "I think we've seen enough. Princess Luna, thank you for doing this, even as unpleasant as some of our discoveries have been."

I clench my hands into fists. I feel as if a rug has been pulled out from under me. Did Starswirl really try to create the pendant to save a dying friend, or was Far Seer just a convenient pawn, and Starswirl had regrets only after the fact?

Luna's squeezes her wing around me gently. "If it helps any, at no time in his life did Starswirl ever display ill intent. Whatever the explanation is for what he did, I am hopeful that it will be something that can be forgiven."

As nice a sentiment as it is, it does little to comfort me, as I have every doubt that I would ever be able to forgive Starswirl, whatever his intent, for as long as I lived.

I burst out of the boutique and galloped hard for the castle sometime later that morning. I had tried to wait for Twilight to summon me, but I simply couldn't focus. I nearly had a shouting match with Rarity over something as trivial as the choice of thread for some hemline work. That was when she kicked me out of the boutique.

Well, okay, I'm exaggerating. She suggested I get some fresh air to clear my head, but it was obvious she didn't want me around sharp implements like scissors or needles for a while.

I had every intention of camping out in the castle until Twilight was ready to see me. I had finished nearly all the books she had lent me and could use some more reading material.

Candy, we need to talk.

I skidded to a stop, very nearly plowing my muzzle into the ground. My head whipped around until I realized where the "voice" had originated. I clenched my teeth and muttered in a low voice, "Not now."

I implore thee, please, allow me to manifest.

I looked around. Most ponies trotted past minding their own business. A few nodded at me and smiled in greeting. In the distance, Lyra and Bon Bon were engaged in what looked like a heated discussion. Lyra's gaze found me and lingered for a moment.

I turned away, ducking my head as I murmured, "I'm kinda out in public right now."

Please, find an unobserved area.

I rolled my eyes. "Are you kidding me??"

A pony stopped and turned his head. "Huh?"

"Er, nothing. Sorry."

The stallion nodded, smiled, and went on his way.

I glanced backwards. Bon Bon headed off alone. When the stream of ponies that were Ponyville's equivalent of rush-hour traffic thinned a bit, I spotted Lyra trotting in my general direction. Was she looking for me? I didn't want to deal with her in any case. Likely she was going to berate me more for suspecting her of being a changeling.

"I swear, Cherry, you just lucked out," I muttered before dashing away. I ducked down a less busy street and found a narrow alley. I shivered briefly as it reminded me of my dream. I trotted down the alley towards the end and glanced back behind me before saying, "Fine, manifest, and make it quick."

My horn glowed, and Michelle materialized before me. Despite my head of steam, my heart lurched at the sight. "What do you want?" I said in a tone not nearly as combative as perhaps I had original intended.

"I saw some of thy dreams last night," Michelle said. "I did not see everything, as I suspect Princess Luna blocked me."

"And I don't like you peeking at them, either!" I snapped. I sighed and lowered my voice when she gave me a hurt look. "I mean, I'm grateful that you helped me when Sevfivtoo had screwed with my head, but you don't have that excuse now."

"Candy, I know what thou art planning."

I raised an eyebrow. "You do? Then enlighten me, because I don't know what to do next."

"I speak of Princess Twilight's continued research into the pendant."

My heart raced. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Please, do not do this."

"Why not? If you won't admit anything, why do I have to?"

Michelle turned away, bowing her head slightly. "Princess Twilight will not stop until she completely understands the pendant."

"You got that right," I said.

"But thou dost not need to hear the answer."

I ground my teeth. Should I tell her that I knew what Sevfivtoo wanted of her? Would she reveal a connection between that and what she intended to do with all that energy? Or was that what she feared Twilight had already discovered? "Why do you want to keep me in the dark? Why don't you want me to know the truth? You keep spouting off about how you don't want to hurt me. Don't you get it? You're hurting me more by not telling me!"

Michelle remained silent.

I stepped up to her. "You don't want me going to Twilight? Fine. Then tell me what I want to know. What are you planning to do? Because right now, Cherry, it looks like you're doing everything to help Sevfivtoo!"

Michelle's head snapped towards me. She gave me a stricken look.

My throat tightened, but I forced the words through. "I-I don't want to believe that. But ... what else could you possibly do with the energy Twilight gave you except give it to that changeling?"

Michelle's eyes glistened. Could a ghost cry? Or was it just a trick, just a means to gain sympathy? Yet it was my own resolve that threatened to shatter as the words I had not wanted to voice tumbled from my mouth. "Are you even who you appear to be? Are you really the spirit of my friend? O-or are you something Starswirl conjured up? Or are you really Far Seer?" I stomped a hoof. "Who are you?!"

Michelle lowered her gaze. A single tear trickled down her cheek. "I am thy friend."

"No, you're not," I said in a shaky voice. "Because friendship doesn't work like this, a-and the real you would know that."

My heart thundered into the silence. Michelle stood absolutely still for what seemed like forever. Finally, she lifted her gaze to mine. "I stopped being the real me when Sevfivtoo killed me." She lifted her arms. "This is not living. This is existing."

"Then why did you say otherwise?!" I cried.

Michelle sighed. "Because I was foolish. Because I wanted to give thee hope. I fell into the same trap that Starswirl had with his friend Far Seer. All I did was cause both of us pain."

"It doesn't have to be like this! Just let Twilight--!"

"She cannot," said Michelle. "And thou art going to learn the hard way. I cannot protect thee anymore. Maybe I never should have. I sheltered thee far too much back on our world."

Tears welled up in my eyes despite using all my will to stop them. I squeezed my eyes shut in one last doomed effort. I had actually wanted her to be an impostor. I could have dealt with that better than the truth.

"I am going to destroy Sevfivtoo," said Michelle in a voice that might as well have been a million miles away. "But I am not going to survive the attempt."

I fell to my haunches and resisted the urge to clamp my fore-hooves over my ears. Somehow, I held onto a shred of rationality through the growing maelstrom of emotion to frame one last question to her. "H-how ... how are you going to--?"

"I suspect Twilight knoweth how and will tell thee if thou art insistent on knowing."

I raised my head. "How can you talk about your own death so casually?!"

"I am already d--"

"Stop saying that!" I swallowed hard and rose to my hooves. "No, I'm not letting you do this. Not when there's a chance you can live again."

Michelle looked away. "Candy, if no such chance had ever existed, wouldst thou condemn me to this non-life for all eternity?"

I uttered a quavering sigh and lowered my gaze. "D-don't ask me things like that."

"I must. I cannot coddle thee any longer. What wouldst thou do?"

My eyes misted, but I did not cry again. "I-I ... I couldn't do anything to end your existence, and don't ever ask me to!"

"But wouldst thou stop me if I chose to end it?"

"Could I actually stop you?" I said in a bitter voice. "Why even ask me? Why didn't you just project yourself and do as you please right now?"

Michelle fell silent for a long moment, and I nearly screamed at her. Even after everything she had finally admitted to me, she still held something back. She glanced at my pendant before finally speaking, "I did not think it fair to thee."

"Oh, right, now you start thinking about that, huh?"

"Dost thou think I take the idea of ending my existence lightly? All I ever wanted to do is protect thee. I cannot stand the idea of Sevfivtoo harming thee. If I can stop that, I will feel my death had meaning. But I need thee to realize this as well. I need thee to understand I do this only for what is best for both of us."

I had no response. I could keep railing as to how much she meant to me, and how much she was hurting me by wishing for her own death a second time, but was I simply too focused on myself? Was I failing to consider her feelings? Had she been right all along that I had to finally let go? Was she really dead, and all I was doing was propping up a memory and pretending it was real?

"You're asking me to agree to w-watch you die again," I said in a low voice. "I can't do that. Maybe somepony more mature than me can, but ... I-I can't."

Tears trickled down Michelle's face. "Thou w-wilt not need to watch."

"That doesn't help." I shuddered as I remembered making the sacrificial move in the chess game. "It will still feel like I did it, like I helped you to--"

Michelle suddenly gasped and vanished.

"Wait, no, come back! This isn't over! You--"

My heart froze as I heard a clop of a hoof behind me. I nearly stumbled as I spun around, swallowing hard as I saw Lyra standing at the end of the alleyway, her mouth open, her pupils having shrunk to points.

I wiped my eyes, took a deep breath, and trotted forward. "Uh, hi. Um ... nice day, isn't it?"

Lyra's gaze darted from side to side. "Candy? Wh-who were you just talking to?"

"Huh? I wasn't talking to anypony."

"No, I distinctly heard you," said Lyra. "And then when I looked into the alley, I thought I caught a glimpse of somepony ... or something else ... standing in front of you."

"I don't know what you're talking about," I snapped. "And are you following me?"

"No, I'm not!" Lyra said. "Um ... I mean ... I did want to talk to you about something." Her gaze flicked over to where Michelle had stood. "I really could've sworn I saw--"

"I'm sorry, Lyra, I don't mean to be rude, but I don't have time for this," I said as I trotted past her. "Fine. I was talking, but I was talking to myself. I like to work out things in my head that way and didn't want to look weird in front of everypony."

Lyra cast a lingering gaze down the alley before turning back to me. "Well, okay, I guess that makes sense. But will you have time later to--"

"Maybe," I said before galloping away.

"You're just in time, Candy," Twilight said with a faint smile, her horn glowing.

I stepped fully inside her lab as she levitated a rectangular wooden block onto a small pedestal. Other pedestals held a potted daisy, a potted tulip, and a pot filled with soil but no plant.

"Howdy, Candy," came an unexpected drawl from another part of the chamber.

I turned my head. "Oh, um, hello, Applejack."

"I asked her to attend this demonstration so she could help confirm something for me," Twilight said. "Now, Candy, how much do you know about transformation spells?"

"You mean other than being subjected to one?" I said, raising a fore-hoof briefly. "Beyond that, not much."

"Transformation spells represent complex magic," said Twilight as she stepped up to the wooden block. Her horn glowed, and a beam of light from it struck the block. It was now spherical. "Changing just the shape is easier than ..." She zapped it again. It became a glass orb. "... changing the material. Somewhere in the middle is ..." Another zap, and I drew back a step when the orb sprouted legs and ran about in a circle. "... animating matter. But please note that this object is no more alive than the pedestal it sits upon." She zapped it one more time, and it was again a wooden block.

"Um, okay, I get it so far," I said, trying not to sound impatient.

Twilight stepped over to the plants. "Living things can be transformed as well, but only into other living things. Even a being that appears to have been changed into an inanimate object still retains its life and spirit. Another consideration: all living things have what is called a 'morphic resonance.' Simply put, it's what decides the nature of a living being. Transformation spells have to overcome that to operate properly." She pointed a hoof to the daisy. "I used a weak transformation spell on this two days ago and turned it into a tulip. Just this morning it turned back into a daisy as its morphic resonance reasserted itself. In general, the more dissimilar a being's modified shape is from its morphic resonance, the faster it will change back."

"So, do I have one of those things, too?" I asked.

"Yes, of course."

"Then why haven't I spontaneously turned back into my old form?"

"That's due to chaos magic," said Twilight. "It has the ability to permanently modify a morphic resonance. Thus things Discord transforms stay transformed unless he decides to change them back, or his magic is neutralized somehow. That's why fighting him was so terribly difficult." She stepped over to the tulip. "But that leads me into a discussion of changeling magic, and what Starswirl did with it."

I nodded quickly.

"Changelings can assert a different morphic resonance at will," said Twilight. "It's how they shapeshift, and why it's tricky to detect them. They're limited in what creatures they can imitate, but Starswirl altered the magic." She pointed a hoof at the tulip. "Two days ago, I cast a spell on this utilizing Starswirl's research. This used to be a daisy. But thanks to the infusion of some altered changeling magic, its morphic resonance has been modified. It's now a tulip permanently."

Applejack stepped up. "But I've seen ya do that kinda stuff already that lasted fer a long while."

"Yes, but it's still an enchantment. It can be dispelled." She indicated the tulip again. "This is permanent. There's no lingering magic to dispel. It would take another transformation spell to change it back. Also, it wasn't quite what Starswirl was going for." She stepped back to the wooden block and levitated it onto the soil of the empty pot. "What he was going for was this."

Her horn blazed. A brilliant beam of light enveloped the block. She clenched her teeth and trembled slightly as the block slowly morphed. My eyes widened, and I heard Applejack gasp as the glow faded. Sitting neatly rooted into the soil of the pot was a daisy.

"Great Celestia ..." Applejack murmured.

"The wooden block is technically organic matter," said Twilight, sounding winded. "But not alive. Starswirl intended to use a combination of changeling magic and magic energy conversion to create life from non-life."

"And you did it?" I cried excitedly. "You actually did it?!"

Twilight held up a hoof. "Applejack, can you examine this flower for me?"

Applejack was already staring in amazement at it. "Well, sure, but what do ya want me ta tell ya about it?"

"Not so much you as what your earth pony magic tells you."

Applejack trotted up to it. She tilted her head slightly, one eyebrow raised. She touched a hoof to the soil, then the blossom itself. "Huh. That's weird."

"What's weird about it?" I snapped. "It's a flower! What more is there to--"

Twilight touched a hoof to my shoulder.

"I don't know how ta word it, sugarcube," said Applejack. "Somethin' jus' feels kinda ... off about it. It don't feel -- whoa!"

In the space of a few seconds, the petals shriveled, turned black, and fell. The stem and leaves followed, everything dissolving into a black, gelatinous mess.

My heart dropped into my stomach.

"What in tarnation?" Applejack said.

Twilight sighed. "That's how every experiment I've tried has ended. I can get it to last longer by infusing more magic, or by using organic material that is closer to living, and the result looks perfectly fine to my magical senses to the very moment it withers. I thought maybe I missed something, but you just confirmed that it's just not working."

"So jus' what was Starswirl tryin' ta do?" Applejack asked.

"I believe his intent was to use the pendant to capture a spirit from what was likely a dying body, fashion a new body via a transformation spell, then project the spirit into that body," Twilight explained. "Except he never got the middle part working."

I stepped up to the failed experiment. "Y-you can fix this, right? You can figure out what Starswirl did wrong?"

Twilight stepped next to me. "I'm not sure I can. The fact that everything looked correct down to the last variable, and I still failed means there's something fundamental about life and spirit that I don't yet understand. This isn't a matter of whether I should create life, but whether it's even possible in the first place."

I swallowed hard. "But if you k-keep at it ..."

"Candy, I don't know where the problem is!" said Twilight in an exasperated voice. "Is the changeling magic failing to impart the morphic resonance properly? Is the energy conversion failing to generate adequate life magic? Is there some other binding force needed to maintain life? I just don't know, and I don't think Starswirl knew, either. In fact, this is further than he ever got. It could take me years to figure out how to make it work."

"Wait a sec," said Applejack. "Ya said this here was the only part he never got right?"

Twilight's expression darkened. "Yes." She pointed to the tulip. "The very same research allowed me to do this, to permanently alter the shape of a living thing. It has limitations. It cannot permanently change a plant into a pony or vice versa as the resonances are too dissimilar. But it can change a pony to look like another pony."

"An' what about the last part? About projectin' spirits?"

"Yes, the pendant is fully capable of doing that right now."

Applejack frowned. "An' what happens if a spirit is projected inta a pony that's already got one? Like any of us standin' here?"

"It depends," said Twilight. "If the pony doesn't have the magical strength to fend it off, the original spirit is displaced or destroyed."

My stomach twisted. "I-is that what Cherry is planning? To p-project herself into Sevfivoo and--"

"Sevfivtoo is too powerful to allow her spirit to be displaced," said Twilight. "What I believe she's intending to do is let Sevfivtoo try to absorb her spirit energy, then channel the horded magical energy in the pendant through her spirit and into Sevfivtoo, literally tearing the changeling apart from within."

Applejack shuddered. "Is that what she was tryin' ta do in the White Tail Woods??"

"Yes, but she likely underestimated how powerful Sevfivtoo was and had to abort the attempt. Or Sevfivtoo had started luring the Crusaders, and Cherry realized there was too much danger of them being hurt."

I trembled as I barely held off tears. "W-we can't let Cherry do this."

"Of course we ain't!" Applejack declared. "Mebbe I don't understand everythin' about how this all works, but if there's any chance she's alive, we ain't lettin' her throw that away."

I wanted to believe that protecting her was the right thing to do despite seeing my hope of granting her a new life shattered like so much glass. But was I doing this for her or for me? Was I simply deceiving myself with another illusion?

These were questions only I could answer, and I had the uneasy feeling that time was running out.

Jump to top

Chapter 41 - Portents

As I headed towards the main entrance of the castle and tried in vain not to feel disappointed, I played out the chess match and Discord's last conversation with me in my head. I envisioned the chess pieces which still stood on the shelf in my room. Almost hourly I had checked those damn things to see if they had changed. I felt like I had all the pieces of a jigsaw puzzle but had to put them together while blindfolded.

I was halfway across the entrance hall when a balcony door banged open above me. I had only barely lifted my head when a rainbow blur rocketed in and came to a hovering stop next to me. "Candy, where's Twilight?!" exclaimed Rainbow Dash.

I looked at her and hesitated in my response. Her coat was scratched, her hair in disarray, and some of her feathers looked broken or disjointed. "What happened to you??"

"Never mind that. I need to talk to Twilight right now!"

"She's in the lab," I said, though the words were barely out of my mouth when I heard wings flapping behind me.

"No, I'm right here," said Twilight as she landed nearby. "Rainbow, where have you been? I sent you on a recon mission two days ago!"

"Well, what do you think I've been doing all that time, huh?"

Twilight gasped. "Are you all right?! What happened to--?"

Rainbow rolled her eyes. "Never mind what happened to me! Right now I've got a question for you."

"What is it?"

Rainbow suddenly zoomed up to Twilight and hovered muzzle-to-muzzle with her. "Have you lost your egghead mind?!"

Twilight cringed. "R-Rainbow, what in Equestria are you talking about?"

Applejack trotted into the chamber. "What's all the ruckus? Rainbow, what in tarnation happened to ya?!"

Rainbow Dash drew back and folded her fore-legs, frowning at Twilight. "I spent the last two days looking for that stupid changeling-queenling-whatever and turning up nothing. So I think, you know who might know where Sevfivtoo is hiding out? Her partner in crime, Wuntusix."

Twilight sighed. "I know where this is going."

"Oh, do you?" Rainbow said in an icy voice. "I'd love to hear the brilliant idea behind it."

Applejack frowned. "Rainbow, ya ain't makin' no sense."

"Twilight's the one not making sense! I went to the sheriff thinking I might pay Wuntusix a little visit." She clopped her fore-hooves together. "You know, maybe 'persuade' her to talk? But guess what? She wasn't there! You know why? Because Twilight took custody of her!"

My mouth dropped open. "What??"

Applejack looked as shocked as I felt. "Twi, didya really do that? Is she here in the castle right now?"

I shivered and stared at Twilight.

"Yes, I did, and she is," Twilight said in a soft voice.

Applejack gave her a wary look. "Ya didn't do nuthin' like ... experiment on her, did ya?"

"Of course not!" Twilight snapped. "I would never do something like that on an unwilling creature using spells I've only just barely begun to understand myself."

Rainbow scratched her head. "Experiment? Well, maybe that wouldn't be so bad, but--"

"Rainbow!" Twilight cried. "Don't even kid about that!"

"Fine! Whatever your reason was, where are the guards? Who's watching it?"

"For the moment, Spike is in charge of her."

Rainbow just stared for a moment. "You left a dangerous changeling in the care of Spike? Are you nuts?!"

"I gotta admit, sugarcube, I'm kinda lost myself," said Applejack.

Her words were nowhere near as strong as what I could have expressed. I felt betrayed; how many times had I visited that castle and had no idea it was there? Did she forget this was the same changeling that tried to make it possible for Sevfivtoo to mind-control me? Again?

"I had to take her in," Twilight said in a low voice. "Wuntusix is dying."

"Whoa, what?" said Applejack.

"What the hay are you talking about?" Rainbow said. She glanced at me. "Wait ... you don't mean ... when Candy threw it against the tree ...?"

Bile rose into my throat as my stomach turned. I gave Twilight a stricken look.

"No," Twilight said firmly. She looked me in the eye. "Candy, you had nothing to do with this at all. Rainbow was right when she said changelings are very resilient to physical damage."

"Then how can it be dying?" Rainbow said.

"Any creature that goes without food will eventually perish, Rainbow."

"I never even thought it might actually be starvin'," Applejack said in a subdued voice.

Twilight gave Rainbow a cold look. "But it's 'just a changeling,' right?"

Rainbow recoiled. "But ... I ... well, I didn't mean I wanted it to die!"

I sympathized with Rainbow Dash. What had I thought once? That hate came more easily when I could think of something or somepony as a faceless monster. I had to be reminded it was a flesh-and-blood living creature. I shuddered as I recalled my violence against it despite Twilight's reassurances that I had not injured it.

Injured her. I still had trouble considering the changeling to be more than a thing.

"So why'd ya bring the critter here?" Applejack asked.

"I hoped the harmonious energies in the castle might help stabilize her until I can figure something out," said Twilight. "And I thought if Spike and I treated her kindly, that might help as well. Or she could feed indirectly off the love Spike and I feel for each other. All it seems to be doing is delaying the inevitable."

"Twilight," Rainbow said in a contrite voice. "When I said I thought about, well, roughing her up, I never meant ... I-I didn't know ..."

Twilight waved a hoof. "I understand, but I wish you had come to me first. I could've told you that I had already thought of that. Drones have an innate sense for their Queen's location, so I thought Wuntusix might have that same sense for Sevfivtoo. She does somewhat, but in her depleted state, she would never be able to pinpoint Sevfivtoo's location from this distance."

"What about Kevin?" I asked. "Can't he lead you to her?"

"Kevin never had any contact with Sevfivtoo while she was building her power," said Twilight. "This is very frustrating. I have everything in place to pinpoint Sevfivtoo's location the moment she approaches Ponyville again. My recent research has allowed me to understand changeling magic more than I ever had before. If she comes in range of my wards, and she uses any magic, especially mind magic, I'll be able to home in on her as good as any changeling Queen might."

"Twilight, I don't get this," I said. "How can Wuntusix be dying? When it ... when she was disguised as Sweetie Belle, I practically lavished affection on her."

"That puzzled me as well until I talked to Wuntusix about it," said Twilight. "Apparently, Sevfivtoo used her as a pawn. She purposely kept Wuntusix starved for love and affection, likely in hopes of forcing her to drain other beings and thus fall more in line with Sevfivtoo's thinking. The last being Sevfivtoo had offered in that way was Sweetie Belle."

I again felt sick.

Applejack frowned and scrunched up her muzzle. "That's ... disgustin'."

"I'm with you," said Rainbow. "That's totally demented."

"So Wuntusix was already far gone by the time she took on Sweetie Belle's appearance," said Twilight. "Candy could only sustain her, like a pony on life support."

"So where are ya keepin' her?" asked Applejack.

"In the guest room that Chrysalis used during the summit," said Twilight. "And, yes, Rainbow, I took precautions. There are shields in place."

"Well, um, good," Rainbow said, though her voice lacked the conviction it had earlier.

"And I'm sorry for my snide comment, it was uncalled for."

Rainbow's ears drooped. "No, I kinda deserved it. I just ... I mean, what the hay am I supposed to think about changelings now? All I ever knew was the trouble they caused us!"

"Maybe consider that it's not the changelings who are at fault, but Chrysalis," said Twilight. "Yes, their means of feeding are unique and problematic, but if Chrysalis hadn't been bent on conquest, maybe things would've turned out better."

"Since we got that straightened out," said Applejack as she stepped up to Rainbow. "What's with ya lookin' like somethin' the cat dragged in?"

Rainbow waved a hoof. "Eh, I tussled with that bugbear thing again."

Twilight gasped. "You did what?!"

"I was following up a lead outside Appleloosa," said Rainbow. "But instead of Sevfivtoo, I found that over-sized bug, so I dropped by to say hello."

Applejack raised an eyebrow. "Say hello?"

Rainbow smirked. "Say hello, uppercut to the jaw, same diff."

Applejack frowned. "Twi, ya think we're gonna hafta deal with that thing again?"

"I was hoping not to worry about it for a while, considering how busy I've been," said Twilight. "Before I got distracted, all I had learned about it was that it had been consigned to Tartarus, but it must have managed to escape."

"I swear, that place seems ta have more holes than a consarned sieve."

"I received some reports of sightings of the creature, but no attacks, and it was moving away from Ponyville. It almost seems to be looking for something." Twilight turned to Rainbow. "I don't like that you found it when you were following a lead on Sevfivtoo, especially when I'm almost sure its attack on the train was no coincidence."

"An' Rainbow had ta go and rile it up," Applejack said in a sour voice.

"Hey, it was plenty riled up all on its own!" Rainbow protested. "Besides, it could've been a coincidence."

"Even if it was, Sevfivtoo would be foolish not to take advantage of the distraction if it did attack Ponyville," said Twilight. "I'm worried that if it attacks again, it'll take all of us to fight it. On the train, we barely made a dent in it."

"So? We just didn't have time to get our game on. This time we'll--"

"Consarn it, Rainbow, willya think fer jus' a second?" Applejack snapped. "Who's gonna protect Candy if we're all busy fightin' that thing?"

Only when I felt an ache did I realize my ears had flattened hard against my head. I looked at the scratches on Rainbow's coat. Some were encrusted with thin lines of dried blood. I remembered how disheveled Twilight had looked after her battle with Sevfivtoo. This crisis endangered my friends now as well as me. Perhaps I had believed them to be indestructible considering what they had faced in the past, but they were flesh-and-blood ponies just as capable of being hurt as me.

My throat tightened. Maybe Discord was trying to tell me that a sacrifice was the only way out, that Michelle was right all along. Yet why had he been upset over it?

Applejack turned to me. "Hey, ya okay there, sugarcube?"

No, I wasn't. I wouldn't be okay until this nightmare was over. I didn’t trust my voice and simply nodded, though my ears remained flattened.

"If it's the pendant the changelin's after, mebbe ya should think about givin' it back ta Twilight."

I had considered that, but it would work only if I truly wanted to give it to her. I was not at all sure I could. Michelle was my responsibility. Perhaps that was foolish, or that I was just letting guilt over her death creep back into my thinking. I could not stand the idea of another friend being hurt or dying because of me.

Twilight stepped up to me. "Candy, you're welcome to give it back to me if you wish, though I'm not sure how much it will help. Sevfivtoo will have no idea that you've given it away until she sees for herself."

I placed a hoof over it. "What other choice do we have, though?"

"I'm going to come up with a contingency plan to protect you regardless," said Twilight. "I just need a few days."

"Isn't the weddin' comin' up in that time?" Applejack said.

Twilight face-hoofed. "Ugh, I forgot all about it!"

"Maybe we should have them postpone it," Rainbow said.

"No," Twilight said firmly. "If we do that, and word gets out why we did it, Sevfivtoo will just abort her plans and we're back at square one. I'm not giving up a chance to take her down once and for all. I'm more than a match for her alone. Maybe I can break away from the battle with the bugbear long enough to take her out if it comes down to that."

"That's gonna be mighty tricky, Twi," said Applejack. "'specially if we gotta go full rainbow on that critter. We're gonna need all of us fer that."

"Let me do some calculations," said Twilight.

Rainbow rolled her eyes. "Oh, right, your mighty slide rule will take it out."

Twilight glared at her, but I shared some of Rainbow's attitude. I knew Twilight was just doing what she did best, but I felt like we were missing something. Unfortunately, the missing piece likely had to come from me.

As if reading my mind, Twilight asked, "I take it there's been no change in the chess pieces?"

"Nothing at all," I said.

"I can't believe you're actually taking anything Discord says seriously," Rainbow said.

"Unfortunately, he's got a dang good track record so far in this mess," said Applejack.

"If he's not the one behind it all," Rainbow grumbled.

"Despite all his faults, Discord has never done anything that intentionally led to somepony's death," said Twilight. "He may have done terrible things in the past, but killing was not one of them. Now, I don't mean to sound short, but I have a lot to do. I'll talk to you later."

She turned away from us and vanished in a flash of teleportation magic.

After leaving the castle, I wandered aimlessly around Ponyville, despite having lots of things I could do. I could go visit Fluttershy. I could go to the boutique and get back to work. I could see what the Crusaders were up to. I could lounge about in the park. I could window-shop in the marketplace. Every prospect triggered a troubling thought or an uneasy feeling; never had I had so much to do and nothing to do at the same time.

Eventually I would be forced to head back to the boutique anyway, as it was growing close to lunchtime. I had enough bits I could get a hayburger, but that would just earn me a lecture from Rarity about proper diet. I didn't need that kind of mothering that day.

"There you are, Candy!"

Ugh, but I needed this even less.

I tried not to frown as I turned at the approach of that infernal mint-green unicorn, but I failed to keep an impatient edge out of my voice, "Hi, Lyra. What is it?"

Lyra chuckled as she trotted up to me. "What is it, she says. Very funny."

"Believe me, right now, I'm feeling as far from funny as possible."

"Well, I guess I can understand that. It did seem like you were having an argument with that otherworldly being in the alleyway."

I stared. "Wait, what?!"

"Oh, come on, Candy, you can tell me," Lyra said.

"I don't have anything to tell you!"

"I only caught a glimpse of it," Lyra continued as if I had said nothing. "But the more I thought about it, the more it looked ... um, well, like something I don't quite have a name for yet, but I know--"

"Frankly, I don't think you know anything," I muttered.

Lyra frowned. "Well, there's no need to be rude."

I stomped a hoof. "I have every right to be as rude as I want! If you knew the tiniest bit about what's really going on--"

Lyra smiled. "Ah! So you do know something!"

I face-hoofed and took a deep breath. "Lyra, please, I'm close to saying something I'm sure I'm going to regret."

Lyra opened her mouth to reply, but another painfully familiar voice cut her off. "She's not the only one!"

I turned my head as Bon Bon cantered up to us. Great, this again. Why did their arguments seem to follow me around? "Lyra, stop it," said Bon Bon. "This is going too far."

Lyra gave her friend a cross look. "What are you talking about? You're the one who gave me the advice."

"I did not mean for you to go browbeat Candy about it!" Bon Bon declared. "I told you that in hopes you'd understand things might be a little stressful for her, and that you should give her some space."

"Look, just admit it, you think I'm weird for believing in this!"

"For the last time, no, I don't. I just wish you'd back off a little. I have no idea why you're so obsessed with this lately."

Lyra frowned. "Remember what I told you happened in the castle? If that weirdo Tree Hugger could figure out my, um, hobby, then others will also, and I'll need proof that I'm not insane."

I really should have galloped away from them as fast as I could, but that would leave me alone with my thoughts again. I had the chance to vent and decided to take it. "Wait a minute, just what the hay did you tell her about me, Bon Bon?"

Bon Bon sighed. "Just that you're ... not from around here."

"That you're an alien," Lyra declared.

My ears flattened, and I drew back a step.

Bon Bon clenched her teeth. "Lyra, some tact, maybe?"

Lyra rolled her eyes. "What? It's not like it's a huge secret! It's in the public record, for Celestia's sake!"

I frowned. I supposed when Rarity told town hall about my origins, they had to put it in the official record. I just never had anypony throw it back in my face before.

"Besides, I started figuring out for myself that Candy was involved in something odd."

"But that doesn't mean you can hound her about it!" Bon Bon cried.

"I'm not hounding her!"

"Yes, you are!" both Bon Bon and I said simultaneously. Bon Bon continued, "Seriously, Lyra, I wished I had never mentioned Candy to you. I only did so because I wanted to give her credit for the work she did on the dress."

"Hmph," Lyra snorted. "A dress I haven't even seen yet."

"Because every time I bring it up, we go back to Candy again and your obsession."

"Or maybe you just don't want to show it to me!"

"Or maybe I just don't want to hear you talk endlessly about one subject!"

"Then maybe we should just stop talking, period!" Lyra shouted.

"Maybe we should!" Bon Bon yelled.

"Wait, stop! Stop!!" I cried, stepping between them. "You're kidding me, right? You're messing up your friendship over me?!"

Lyra and Bon Bon exchanged frowns. "Well ... not directly," said Bon Bon in a lower voice.

"I don't care if it's direct or indirect! I refuse to be part of this!"

"It didn't start with you," Lyra said in a more contrite voice. "It started with my, um, particular interest that--"

"Oh, for Celestia's sake, Lyra, just tell her what it is!" Bon Bon exclaimed.

"Actually, I don't care," I said. "It's still the most stupid reason for screwing up a friendship I've heard in my entire life."

Both ponies' mouths dropped open as they stared at me. Good, it at least got them to shut up, and I had not even begun to vent.

"You two have absolutely no clue what it means to have a serious issue with a long friendship. And if you must know, Lyra, that's what the incident in the alleyway was about. So pardon me if I'm not all bursting at the seams to tell you about it!"

Lyra's ears drooped. "Oh ... um ... I didn't know."

Bon Bon sighed. "See, Lyra? She just proved my point!"

"Bon Bon, stop it," I snapped.

"Hey, I'm on your side!"

"I didn't ask you to take sides, and I'm not taking sides either! Maybe Lyra is obsessing too much, but did you stop to think that just maybe she might really be upset about people finding out? Because if there's any pony who knows about keeping a secret that she thinks is so terrible -- like, just to pick something at random, being an alien -- it would be me. Or maybe you just never had a situation where you had to keep something secret."

Bon Bon gave me a shocked look and blushed. "Er, well ... I-I guess some of us are just lucky that way, but ... um ..." She glanced at Lyra. "Maybe I could've been a little more understanding."

Lyra sat and folded her fore-legs. "Hmph. At least." She paused, and her expression softened as she glanced from me back to her friend. "And, well, maybe I should've pulled back a bit."

"And maybe you should consider, oh, I don't know, that others won't think badly of you if they knew?" I said. "Gee, I wonder if we can find a pony around here who was in that situation, too? Oh, wait!" I raised a fore-hoof. "Guess that's me again. This is your lucky day."

Lyra and Bon Bon exchanged another look. "I guess it's kind of stupid to argue about this all the time," Lyra murmured.

"I never wanted to argue in the first place," said Bon Bon in a soft voice. "Really, I just didn't want to see you disappointed or hurt."

Lyra smiled. "I'm really sorry, Bon Bon."

"So am I, Lyra."

Lyra turned to me. "And I apologize, Candy. Bon Bon was right, I was hounding you."

"Give it a week, and maybe I can talk to you about whatever it is you want," I said. "Just let's do it on my terms, okay?"

Lyra's smile widened. "Thanks."

"Come on, Lyra, let's get some lunch," said Bon Bon.

Lyra rose to her hooves. "I'm with you. See you later, Candy."

"Yes, see you later," said Bon Bon. "And thanks."

I gave them a small smile as I watched them leave. I took a deep breath and let it go. Hopefully, I got them out of my hair for--

"Woohoo! Go Candy!" an exuberant high-pitched voice suddenly cried behind me.

I whirled around. A smiling Pinkie Pie sat in a folding chair, popcorn at one hoof, the other curled around a banner reading "TEAM CANDY."

"Not only did I get to see you rip two ponies a new one at the same time, you solved a friendship problem, too!" Pinkie chirped. "Were you secretly recruited by the Cutie Map?"

"Er, no, I just--"

"Oo, I know! Rarity is making it look like she's teaching you fashion, but she's really secretly training you to be a friendship expert."

"Really, Pinkie, I sort of just sneaked up on that one, and only to--"

"A friendship ninja, then!"

That bit of imagery was so bizarre it made my brain simply stop for a moment.

Pinkie giggled and hopped out of her chair. She trotted over to me and pulled me into a hug. "However it happened, I think Rarity would be proud of you. Aaaand I think it means you're really getting the hang of living in Equestria."

I honestly had not set out to solve anything, I just wanted them to leave me alone. What had I actually done but simply relate to them my own unusual experience? I doubted that was worthy of praise. Certainly nothing like what the others have done.

And I still couldn't fix my own friendship problem.

As for getting the hang of this world, maybe Pinkie was right. Sometimes I couldn't see the forest for the trees when it seemed like impending disaster loomed on the horizon. I had settled into a routine when I wasn't tied up in emotional knots over Michelle. Being a pony and living in Equestria became a little less strange each day.

Sometimes when Rarity and Sweetie Belle greeted me in the morning, especially in those moments when I could almost bring myself to call Rarity "Mom," it seemed as if I had been a pony all along and only imagined I had been human. A far cry from when it felt like the other way around, that this existence was a nightmare that I could not wake up from.

"Thanks, Pinkie," I said in a soft voice.

"Hey, I think that deserves a treat," said Pinkie. "What do you think?"

"Um, a treat?"

"Sure! Come with me to Sugarcube Corner and I'll make us ice cream sodas."

My stomach rumbled a bit. "Well, actually, it's getting towards lunchtime."

"Oh, you're right! I'll have to put in a few extra scoops of ice cream."

I rolled my eyes. "That's not quite what I meant. I ... um ... you know what? That sounds like a great idea. Lead the way."

"I should've hung out with you today," said Sweetie Belle. "Maybe I would've gotten an ice cream soda, too."

"Yes, well, then we'd have two ponies at the table who could manage only half of a healthy dinner," said Rarity in a lofty voice as she left her seat.

"Um, heh, sorry," I said sheepishly as I picked at a few sprigs of parsley with my fork.

Rarity gave me a small smile; she wasn't really upset with me but couldn't pass up the opportunity for a playful jab. "You can make up for it by helping me clear the table."

Sweetie hopped off her seat. "I'm going to bed. I'm tired."

I levitated dishes and silverware to the sink. "I'm probably going to turn in right after this, too."

"Okay, then, good night, Candy!"

"Night, Sweetie."

I smiled as I watched her leave. Rarity trotted alongside me, carrying the glassware and more silverware. "In all seriousness, Candy, I'm happy to hear you helped Lyra and Bon Bon. They've been such good friends ever since I can remember. I would hate to have them toss it away over something trivial."

"I kinda had my own motivations for doing it, to be honest," I said.

"Nevertheless, I still commend you for it." Rarity sighed dramatically. "Even if your Manehattan mannerisms were showing."

I grinned. "I'll take that as a compliment."

"You would. Anyway, I heard they were going out to dinner to celebrate the anniversary of their friendship, so that's a good sign." She dropped her voice lower as we set about washing the dishes. "Now, Candy, I have to ask: are you holding up okay? Do you need to talk to me about anything?"

"I'm holding up," I said in a neutral voice. "As for talking about it, kinda yes and no. I wouldn't know where to start."

"I often find that the beginning is a good place."

I snorted. "You're getting as snarky as me."

"I see no reason to insult your mother."

We both laughed. "Thanks, I needed that," I said, smiling. "But, really, I can't say anything that hasn't already been said. I just want this to be over."

We were quiet for a few moments. "If I may make an observation, dear?" said Rarity.

"Sure."

"Don't be too hard on yourself."

"I'm not."

Rarity raised an eyebrow.

"Well, not much," I added.

"I've seen how you look at those chess pieces, like their very existence bothers you," said Rarity. "Please don't feel like you need to solve everything."

"But in a way, I do. Discord gave those to me. Cherry is my friend. All of you hardly know her."

Rarity considered for a long moment. We really had gotten so used to each other. She knew exactly when I could not be pushed any further on a given topic. "Then let me say this instead: don't underestimate yourself."

I couldn't quite meet her eyes. "I guess I'm not sure what you mean."

"You're smarter than you give yourself credit for. Don't fall into the trap that because you are 'just' a teenager that you're too emotional to be useful."

"I never said that!"

"You don't have to. Your actions and your tone of voice often speak volumes."

Had I been giving off that sort of vibe? "I don't know what to say," I said in a soft voice.

"You don't need to say anything," Rarity said. "Just think on it for a bit."

"I will, I promise."

We finished up the dishes, and she drew me into a tight hug. "And, Candy? Whatever happens over these next few days, please ... be careful."

I thought that a strange bit of advice, but I nodded and smiled faintly. "I'll try."

"Good night, Candy."

"Good night."

I almost did it. The word almost came to my lips. Never had there been a more appropriate moment. Yet I held back again. Why did I keep doing that?

In my room, a pale light fell upon those damn chess pieces. They remained maddeningly the same. I sometimes hoped I would find Discord among them again, if for no other reason than--

Wait. Pale light?

I glanced out the window. The moon was on the other side of the boutique, and I hadn't turned the night light on. Where the hell was light coming from? It moved when I moved.

...

My horn was glowing.

It was not the full-on glow of levitation magic, or anywhere near how it lighted when Cherry manifested. No more than a faint pastel shade of blue shone from it.

"Cherry?" I called out. "Are you doing this?"

Silence.

The glow faded, leaving me in darkness.

I flicked on the light. I stepped into the bathroom and looked at myself in the mirror. I touched a hoof to my horn. Everything seemed normal.

My heart didn't pound. My throat didn't try to close up. My ears had not flattened. I had no sense anything was wrong. I had read that maturing unicorns could experience occasional sporadic energy discharges that were effectively harmless, but they usually caused tingling or other odd sensations. I felt good, like I did when either Rarity or Sweetie Belle hugged me.

Maybe it meant something good was going to happen. Maybe it meant nothing. Either way, I was too tired to worry about it. I lighted my horn just long enough to take one final look at the chess pieces before settling down to sleep.

Jump to top

Chapter 42 - Time Runs Out

I awoke from a fitful sleep, sunlight already slashing across the bedsheets. I groaned as I kicked them off with my rear hooves. I hated sleeping late, especially with all the work that the boutique would have with the wedding coming up in another day.

I yawned as I stumbled out of bed and into the bathroom, frowning at the vision of my disheveled mane in the mirror. It would take more time than I really had to get it into shape, but where I now assisted Rarity by dealing with customers directly, she would accept nothing less than me looking my best. I sighed as I heard Sweetie Belle's distant voice followed by the back door closing. So I wasn't going to have my little sister around today to hear my laments.

I took as quick a shower as I could, and after drying my hair, it had transformed from a disheveled mess to a poofy mess. I had only just applied the brush when I heard the front door open. A customer already? I hadn't even had breakfast yet!

I frowned and wandered out of the bathroom, still moving the brush in broad strokes through my mane. I glanced at the wedding invite on the bureau and froze. "What the hay?" I muttered as I levitated the ticket and held it before me. "Today? The wedding is today?!"

I looked at the calendar. I distinctly had the next day marked. I could not have made that serious an error. With a frustrated growl, I slapped the invitation down and turned, intending to head to the door and call down to Rarity to see if hers had the same error.

My gaze swept over the book shelf, and all thoughts of the wedding were shattered.

I tossed the brush aside and grabbed the chess piece that had been a question mark the night before. It no longer appeared as such, but I didn't know what the hell it was. It looked a bit like a large, ferocious bear, but with odd markings and an extra set of arms. And ...

... wings.

Oh, shit.

"Candy! Get down here at once!"

Rarity's yell startled me so badly I nearly dropped the chess piece. I galloped down the stairs, skidding to a halt in the front room as I saw Rarity standing with Twilight.

Twilight stepped up to me. "Candy, my wards tripped! Sevfivtoo is back!"

My heart thundered. "That's not the only thing you have to worry about!" I thrust the chess piece towards her.

Twilight's mouth fell open, her pupils shrinking to points.

"Oh, dear Celestia, this is exactly what you were worried about, Twilight!" said Rarity.

Twilight narrowed her eyes. "We'll deal with this."

"But the wedding is supposed to be today!" I cried. "At least that's what the invites say."

"Yes, and that error may be to our advantage."

"What are you talking about?" Rarity demanded.

"Cadance and Shining Armor are already here," said Twilight. "Princess Celestia and Princess Luna are about to arrive soon. That makes the wedding hall the safest place in Equestria for Candy right now."

Despite hearing this, I felt no sense of relief. This was simply the opening act of a larger play. I had to hope that it didn't turn out to be a tragedy.

Twilight turned to Rarity. "I have to warn the others. Meet us near the clearing by the bridge as soon as you can so we can discuss strategy. If that bugbear is about to attack, that will be the most likely approach."

"What about the changeling?" Rarity said.

"Right now, she's keeping her distance. We'll have to figure out some way to lure her in or pinpoint her location. She's avoiding using magic right now, but I'm betting that will change." Twilight turned away. "I need to go, we don't have a lot of time."

"I'll be along shortly!" Rarity called out as Twilight galloped out of the boutique. Rarity swiftly closed the front door and locked it. She drew the shades down as she turned to me. "Candy, go to the wedding hall right now."

"Let me get my mane sorted out first," I said in a shaky voice.

"You shouldn't delay even a second! You'll be safe at--"

"Sevfivtoo isn't even close yet! You really want me to appear in front of all of Ponyville looking like this??"

Rarity face-hoofed. "Of all the times you could have picked to finally acquire some of my fashion sense."

That's not what had happened. I hated lying to her, but I didn't have time to argue. The game had only just started. This could not have been simply a setup to warn of the danger of the bugbear, as Rainbow Dash had already stumbled on that threat the other day.

Everything that had happened over the past few days exploded in my head into a roiling mass of disjointed imagery, and I had to calm down enough to sort it out. "Look, this won't take long. I'm not going to do anything fancy. I just don't want it to look like it's about to fly off everywhere."

"Fine," Rarity said. "But don't dawdle! Brush it out and get going!"

"I will."

Rarity pulled me into a tight hug before galloping towards the back door of the boutique.

I swallowed hard and took a deep breath, but it did nothing to calm me. I was surprised Rarity had not felt my heart pounding when she hugged me. Or maybe she had and assumed it was just normal fear. I stared at the chess piece as if to will it into giving me a clue as to what to do next. Instead, my next hint came from a place I had hoped it never would.

Candy, please, I need to manifest. Sevfivtoo is growing near.

My heart lurched, and my eyes misted. "How do you even know that? Has that stupid avatar broken the privacy shield?"

It cannot block all magic. We can still sense when Sevfivtoo is near.

I frowned. "I-I'm not letting you do this."

Thou hast no choice.

"The other alicorn Princesses are here. They can protect me. Protect us."

Yes, they can, but then this cycle will continue on. Sevfivtoo will not stop. She will pick another place, another time. Eventually, thy luck will run out.

I wanted to scream. I stomped a hoof, but it did nothing to vent my anguish. I clenched my teeth until I heard them grind. "A-and you think I can just let you go, let you project yourself to Sevfivtoo? You think I can send you off to your death?!"

It is no longer that simple.

"What are you talking about?"

Perhaps thou dost not know. Twilight placed an additional spell upon the pendant. It inhibits how far I can project. She paused, my heart hammering into the uneasy silence. I need thy help to get closer to Sevfivtoo.

My legs felt weak. The chess game played out in my mind again. The very thing I had feared had come to pass: I would have to actively participate in Michelle's demise. I had to make the sacrificial move.

Or I could do as Rarity said, and shield myself behind a phalanx of alicorns. Then we do this again and again. The nightmare would continue, and maybe this time Discord will tire of the game and give me no further clues.

Something shimmered out of the corner of my eye. I turned my head, and my eyes widened. The chess piece had changed. It was a question mark again, but it had changed in color from black to white.

A clop of hooves against the door of the boutique interrupted my thoughts, and a male voice inquired with some desperation, "Rarity??"

I trotted over to the window and peeked under the shade. A brown earth stallion stood outside the boutique. Part of an hourglass-shaped cutie mark was covered by a suit on a hanger hooked to his collar. He pounded on the door with his fore-hooves and called out Rarity's name again before making a frustrated noise.

I turned away from the window and stared at the piece again. What did this mean? Another unknown, but ... on my side?

Candy, please, I beg of thee.

"Shh!" I hissed. "Let me think!"

I remembered what Twilight had said about tracking Sevfivtoo. I thought about the chess game, where the question mark piece had forced me to occupy the Rarity, Fluttershy, and Twilight pieces; the sacrificial move, which set off Discord's temper; Discord's conversation to me when ...

When he said ...

~~~

Discord gave me a sly smile. "Keep your mind open while your opponent makes a ruckus." He paused. "Or fracas."

~~~

My stomach twisted, and I staggered. No, he couldn't have meant that. The cards would have to land just right. Either that, or Discord had indeed set up a winning move, and I had to play it through. If I was wrong ... I would be as dead as Michelle.

I glanced out the window again. The stallion was talking to a unicorn wearing headphones. I dashed away from the window as fast as I could without the clop of my hooves alerting him that somepony was still in the boutique. As crazy as it sounded, I actually felt a little guilty; I likely could have done whatever tailoring he needed for his suit.

I tucked the chess piece into my mane and headed into my workroom. "Cherry, you need to listen to me. You have to do something before I'll let you manifest."

Candy, there is little time left.

"Then you better decide in a hurry!"

Michelle hesitated before responding in a reluctant tone, What is it thou wishest of me?

"You're going to make me a Pinkie Promise," I said. "That you will not attempt to attack Sevfivtoo without my permission."

I cannot make that--

"Yes, you can! Because if you don't, you're staying in that pendant, and I'll gallop right over to the wedding hall. I'm not giving you a choice here!"

A long pause, then: I promise.

"Not good enough. Say the whole thing."

I Pinkie Promise I will not attack Sevfivtoo without thy permission, said Michelle. Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in mine eye.

I let out a ragged breath. I really hoped Twilight had not been kidding when she said a Pinkie Promise had real magic associated with it. "Okay. Manifest."

My horn blazed, and Michelle materialized before me, giving me a sad look. Before I could open my mouth to speak, my horn glowed brilliantly a second time, and the avatar of Starswirl appeared as well, his face creased into a deep frown. "What nonsense art thou up to with this ludicrous promise thou extractest from--"

I marched up to him. "Shut up. I don't want to hear it from you. And I never gave you permission to manifest."

The avatar snorted. "Thou gavest thy friend permission. That was good enough."

I glared at him. "You interfaced with my horn, didn't you? Just like Twilight said you might do!"

"Of course." He narrowed his eyes. "But I could not get completely around requiring thy permission."

"Yeah, thank Twilight and her 'alicorn bag of tricks' for that."

"And it remaineth as such! Given enough time, I am sure I--"

"Starswirl, stop, please," said Michelle. "We do not have time. Candy, willst thou help us? We cannot do this alone."

Starswirl grunted. "We could if Candy would give permission for me to use her horn to break the inhibiting charm on the pendant."

"Like Tartarus I will," I snarled. "Listen to me, both of you. I'll help you take out Sevfivtoo, but you're going to do it my way. You got that?"

"Why should I listen to a mere child?" the avatar scoffed.

"Because this 'child' knows a lot more than you do about what's going on."

The image of Starswirl smirked. "And how dost thou come by this knowledge, hmm? Discord, perhaps?"

I hesitated, my gaze flicking between him and Michelle. "I don't have to tell you that."

"No, thou dost not!" proclaimed the avatar. "Because I already know thou hast!"

I frowned at him. "How the hay would you know anything about what's going on with the privacy shield in place? You can hear me only when I address you two directly!"

"And that, my dear child, is why thou knowest far less than thou believest. Did not Cherry tell thee how certain magicks cannot be blocked? No mere shield can stop chaos magic from being felt. I know thou hast spent time near Discord."

Michelle's eyes widened. "Candy, is this true? Didst thou consort with Discord for thy plan?"

My heart pounded. "What if I had?! It doesn't matter! What matters is he--"

"I will tell thee what matters!" the avatar thundered. "What matters is Discord was responsible for the pendant appearing in thy world in the first place!"

My mouth worked, but no words came to me at first. When they finally did, I had to force them out. "Y-you're lying. You have to be."

"He is not lying, Candy," said Michelle in a somber voice. "Starswirl remembers everything which transpired with the pendant."

I had no response. I had talked about the cards landing just right. Now it appeared my plan was a house of cards, and this had been the breeze to destroy it.

The avatar took a step closer. "Dost thou wish to know exactly how it came to be in thy world? He found the pendant during his first reign, when he knew the alicorns Celestia and Luna were plotting to end his rule. He wished to use it against them, but I would not allow it. In his anger and frustration, he opened a portal and hurtled the pendant into it."

I trembled as my heart sank.

"If thou dost wish to know where to place the ultimate blame for the death of thy friend," Starswirl said. "Then place it squarely at the hooves of Discord! If it were not for him, it would never hath appeared in thy world!"

I squeezed my eyes shut. My emotions wanted to swallow me up in a miasma of doubt and shame. Had I been so stupid? Had I let myself be fooled? Was this just like Chrysalis all over again?

I went over everything in my head yet again. I thought I had been right. I thought I had figured it out. Was I just too dumb ... or too emotional ... or ...

~~~

"Then let me say this instead: don't underestimate yourself."

I couldn't quite meet her eyes. "I guess I'm not sure what you mean."

"You're smarter than you give yourself credit for. Don't fall into the trap that because you are 'just' a teenager that you're too emotional to be useful."

~~~

I took a deep breath, letting Rarity's words repeat in my head. I lifted my gaze squarely into the avatar's eyes. "Fine. Discord sent the pendant to my world. I'll deal with that later. I'm still in charge here, and we're going to do it my way!"

The avatar glared at me. "Thou art the most stubborn pony I have ever met."

"Flattery will get you nowhere. Now, I'm cutting this off, as I have to get to Twilight's castle as fast as I can. We'll talk again then."

I willed the flow of magic to the spell to shut off before they could protest, and both images faded from sight.

I had taken only a step when I heard a thunderous boom, and the floor shook. I galloped out the back way. As I turned around the side of the boutique, my eyes fell upon a sight that made me recoil and nearly fall back on my haunches. My ears flattened, and my legs trembled with the urge to bolt.

The bugbear sat on the ground at the end of a long furrow, the creature looming far larger than I had ever conceived it would. I caught sight of Twilight in time to see her fire a blast of energy from her horn at it, which only seemed to enrage it further. Rainbow Dash buzzed it a few seconds later before it launched itself back into the air with frightening ease in hot pursuit of my friends.

My heart skipped a beat as I saw Rarity among them. Worry and pride rose in equal measure at first, but when the creature launched another attack, the former won out when I witnessed Rarity leap away from its stinger at the last moment.

I had to focus. She had her battle, I had mine. Fortunately, they lured the creature in the opposite direction from where I needed to go. I galloped towards the castle, fighting down the twinge of guilt for disobeying Rarity.

I once again wished the Equestrian language had more swear words when I discovered that the shields around Wuntusix's room worked both ways. She couldn't get out, but I couldn't get in. I guessed Twilight had feared a situation similar to the townspeople storming the place with torches and pitchforks to confront the monster.

I took a step back from the door. "Cherry, Starswirl, get out here. I need your help."

Brilliant light reflected from the walls, and the two figures stood side by side. The avatar wore the same sour expression as before. Michelle had her arms folded, and a frown marred her face. "And just what doth the child need from us?" said the avatar.

I had thought Michelle angry with me until she turned and glared at the avatar. "Stop calling her that. We have discussed this."

"Thou didst much shouting. I would not call that 'discussion'."

I pointed a hoof at the door. "I need to get in there. Can you dispel Twilight's shield if I let you use my horn?"

The avatar narrowed his eyes and said nothing.

"And you call me a child?! You're acting like a brat that got denied a treat!"

"Thou assumest I intend to help thee--"

"I'm trying to help you, you idiot!"

"Candy," Michelle said. "What is it thou wishest to do?"

I turned to her. "You want to find Sevfivtoo, right? That's what I'm trying to do."

"I can lead thee to her as far as needed for--"

"And would you lead me to her precise location? Would you bring me right up to her?"

Michelle looked taken aback. "Absolutely not. I need only to be close enough to--"

I frowned. "Yeah, that's what I thought. You're still not getting it. We're not doing your plan. We're doing mine. But I need to get to Sevfivtoo, and for that I need the changeling that's in that room."

The avatar's eyebrows rose. "Thou dost not mean Wuntusix?!"

"Yes."

"Thou art truly mad!"

"Candy, Wuntusix is a follower of Sevfivtoo," Michelle said.

Maybe she didn't mean it, but her tone sounded like a parent trying to instruct a wayward child. I tried to ignore it, but impatience edged my voice. "She isn't anymore. I don't have time to explain the whole thing to you. And why should I? You never explained anything to me until my friends and I practically dragged it out of you!"

I knew that sounded petty, and from the way the avatar sneered, it likely played right into his idea that I was nothing more than a foal throwing a tantrum.

I stepped up to Michelle. "I'm going to say the same thing to you that you said to me. You have to trust me."

Michelle averted her eyes and uttered a forlorn sigh. She glanced at the avatar.

"Do not look to me for guidance," said the image of Starswirl in a low voice. "I had not wished the fate upon thee that thou hast chosen for thyself. And thou knowest thy friend best." He paused. "And perhaps I am not the best judge of what it means to be a good friend."

Perhaps I could have done this without Wuntusix. Michelle seemed on the verge of agreeing with me, and she could lead me there just as precisely as Wuntusix. Yet the chess pieces I had been given included her. If I left her out, I feared I would disrupt whatever cosmic forces were guiding me.

And as much as it pained me to admit it, I still could not trust that Michelle would not refuse at the last minute.

Michelle sighed. "Help her, Starswirl. Give her what she needs."

The avatar frowned. "Very well."

My horn erupted with light. The flow of power felt different, more forceful and direct, as if I were sensing some of the personality of the caster. Forks of energy shot out from my horn and played along the outline of the door, until the door itself pulsed with purple light that abruptly flickered out.

"It is done," said Starswirl as my horn quiesced. "Thou mayest proceed with thy breaking and entering."

I rolled my eyes and cut off the manifestation spell. I watched them vanish before I lifted a trembling hoof to the latch.

My heart raced as I pushed open the door, and I froze as my gaze fell upon the creature. She lay bundled in the covers, shivering slightly as if all she was suffering from was a bout of the flu. She hardly looked threatening despite her insect-like features. Had this really been the same creature I had thrown against a tree in a rage?

I stepped forward slowly. Despite the carpeted floor, my hooves clopped loudly enough in the quiet to rouse the creature. She rolled over with a soft moan, and in a weak, raspy voice she said, "P-Princess? Are you back already?"

Wuntusix uttered a sharp gasp as her eyes fell on me. She pulled the blanket around her tighter and shook like a leaf in the wind. Why did I expect she would greet me with anything but abject fear? She likely viewed those bars at the jail not as protecting everypony from her, but protecting her from everypony, and from me especially.

I stopped approaching. "Um ... I ... I'm not going to hurt you."

She just stared at me, not moving a muscle save for her trembling.

I averted my eyes for a moment. "I'm sorry if I did hurt you before. I was just ... I wasn't myself. I'm not like that."

Wuntusix relaxed her grip slightly on the blanket and slowly nodded once but said not a word, her wide eyes still fixed on me.

What exactly had I planned to do? Had I expected I could just grab her and use her like some sort of tool? That made me no better than Sevfivtoo. Maybe I couldn't quite show her as much sympathy as I wished I could, but I didn't have to subject her to more abuse. I took a deep breath. "Wuntusix ... I need your help."

The changeling lowered her gaze. "I wish I could. The Princess asked me about this. I cannot sense Sev from here."

"I know, but I have a means to get close enough to her so you could lead me the rest of the way."

"Wh-what? What of the Princess' wards? They--"

"Twilight and her friends are a little busy right now!" I snapped, struggling not to yell despite my impatience. "Your partner ... former partner sicced a monster on Ponyville, and they're all busy fighting that. I've got no other choice. It's us or nothing!"

Wuntusix whimpered softly and clutched the blanket to her again, her wings quivering. Only then did I realize what I was asking her to do. Maybe the castle couldn't feed her enough, but here she would endure longer. Outside its environs, I had no idea how long she would last, and that was assuming Sevfivtoo didn't kill her on the spot. The move was still a sacrifice, I simply had shifted it to another piece.

I was treating Wuntusix like a pawn.

"I'm not going to make you do this," I said in a quavering voice. Did that really make it any better? Would giving her the choice absolve me? "You really don't have any obligation to my friend."

"But I do!" Wuntusix cried. "I failed to stop Sev from draining her."

I could indeed easily blame Wuntusix, but I didn't want that be the basis of her decision.

"I wish I could bring her back," Wuntusix said in a miserable voice, her gaze falling on my pendant.

I didn't have time to debate this any further with myself. I had to forge ahead and hope I could live with my choices later. When I spotted her eyes on the pendant, I gambled I had a chance to get through to her. I stepped closer and lifted the pendant with my hoof. "Twilight understands this thing now. She got further than even Starswirl! She might get further still, but she needs a lot more time. But none of that will matter if Cherry isn't kept safe. Don't you see how important this is?!"

Wuntusix continued to tremble as she stared at my pendant. I had no idea what she was thinking, other than she looked even more scared than before.

I couldn't do this. I had no right to do this. What the hell had I been thinking when I came up with this idea? That she was "just a changeling?" That nopony would miss her if she died?

I sighed and let the pendant drop, lowering my gaze. "N-never mind," I said in a weak voice as I started to turn away.

"Wait!"

I stopped. I did not dare say a word.

"I-I'll do it. I'll go with you. I'll help you find Sev."

I winced when Wuntusix slid out of bed and hit the floor like a pile of wet rags. She grunted as she rose to her trembling hooves. She fluttered her wings, panting as if it were taking all her effort. She flew maybe half the length of the bed before crashing to the floor with a whimper.

I took a deep breath. Wuntusix gasped and tensed when I enveloped her in my magic, as if steeling herself. I lifted her, hesitated, and gently placed her on my back.

What exactly had I expected? An alien coldness? Just some general ickiness? She was warm, like any flesh-and-blood pony might be. I felt her shiver as her legs wrapped around my barrel and neck to steady herself. Her breathing was labored.

I trotted into the hallway. "Cherry, I need you, and bring Starswirl with you."

Wuntusix flinched when my horn blazed, and she trembled as the figures materialized before us. The avatar raised a single eyebrow and fixed his critical gaze at my passenger but said nothing. Michelle wore a neutral expression that was obviously forced.

I stepped up to the image of Starswirl. "You've already proven you can do magic through my horn. I need you to do something like that later, but I want to make sure you can actually do it."

"Hmph," the avatar scoffed. "Only now thou considerest the implications of--"

"I didn't invite your commentary!" I exclaimed. "Can you do a shield spell against mind magic?"

Michelle uttered a small gasp. I felt Wuntusix's grip tighten, and her breathing become more raspy.

The avatar's eyebrows rose. "It is not can I do such a spell, but will I do it. And if thou canst handle the power through thine immature horn."

"Candy, please, don't do this," said Michelle. "Canst thou see this is suicide?"

"And how many times did I say that to you?!" I shouted. "Only to find out that's what you intended all along! Well, guess what? I have no intention of sacrificing myself." I paused and glanced down at the changeling's fore-hooves wrapped around me. "I-I don't want to sacrifice anypony."

The avatar frowned. "I cannot maintain such a spell indefinitely. Either thy horn will burn out, or our store of energy will be expended. Or didst thou not consider what thou wouldst do if thy plan fails?"

I resisted the urge to stomp my hoof. I really did need to stop doing that. He was right, I had not considered what to do if I failed.

"Candy," said Michelle softly.

I forced myself to meet her eyes.

"I ... I wish to support thy plan, but--"

"Art thou insane?!" the avatar hissed. "When thou hast little clue as to what it is?!"

"Like the copious information we gave her on ours?" Michelle said in an acid voice.

The image of Starswirl grumbled something under his breath and looked away.

"I was wrong to keep thee in the dark, Candy," said Michelle. "I cannot be forgiven for that."

"No, please, don't say that," I said in a quavering voice.

"But I also cannot in good conscience allow thee to come to harm and have all our plans come to naught. Thou must promise us." She paused. "Thou must Pinkie Promise us that, if thy plan fails ... we will revert to mine."

I tried to fall back on all my old protests: I couldn't be asked to send her to her death; I was not capable of making this sort of choice; I was not the kind of pony who could ever contemplate this. Yet I had a changeling on my back who I likely had just consigned to death. That she had agreed of her own volition meant little; I still felt like I had guilted her into it.

And Michelle had been right. We couldn't keep doing this. If we gave up this opportunity to defeat Sevfivtoo, she would find another way to attack my friends. For all I knew, any number of them could be badly injured already in their battle with the bugbear.

"All right," I said in a shaky voice. "I Pinkie Promise to allow you to d-do what you originally intended if my plan fails. Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye."

Never had words that had sounded so silly when I had first heard them hold such terrible import.

"Now that we have that out of the way," said the image of Starswirl. "What exactly is thy plan?"

"You already know it," I said. "Shield me against Sevfivtoo's magic."

"And?"

"Just do that as long as possible. I'm ... I'm expecting help to arrive."

The avatar narrowed his eyes. "Dare I ask who?"

I touched the chess piece in my mane with my magic, just to feel its shape. It remained a question mark. "It's not important. I should cut this off. I don't want you two expending any more energy than you have to."

"I hope thou knowest what thou art doing," the avatar grumbled.

I terminated the manifestation spell and watched them fade. "So do I," I whispered before I galloped away.

Jump to top

Chapter 43 - Checkmate

All that disturbed the uneasy calm were the chirping of the birds, my own thundering heart, and the raspy breathing of Wuntusix. Michelle walked in eerie silence as she ventured ahead. I held my breath when she stopped, looking off towards the north. "That way," she said in a hushed voice. "Not very far."

I flinched when I heard Wuntusix's voice, as she had not spoken a word since we left the castle. "I-I can sense Sev. Just barely."

Michelle stepped over to me. "I believe I know the answer, but I must ask: dost thou wish to reconsider? I can project myself from this distance."

"No," I said as firmly as my growing fear would let me. "We have to stick with my plan. I love you too much to do anything else."

Michelle nodded and slowly smiled. "I never stopped loving thee, Candy, please know that."

Her smile became bittersweet, and doubt threatened to cloud my thoughts, yet I knew how to dispel it. I had to say the hardest words of my life. "Cherry ... I ... i-if Twilight can't figure out how to let you live again, I promise I won't let you endure this existence. I'll find a way you can p-pass on peacefully."

Michelle uttered a heartfelt sigh. "I so hope that doth not come to pass, but I am immensely grateful for thine understanding."

Despite my efforts, a few tears trickled down my face.

"C-Candy," Wuntusix said in a shaky voice. "Sev is moving."

I wiped my eyes. "Where?"

"East. Towards Ponyville."

"Dispel me for now," said Michelle in an urgent voice. "And please be careful."

I nodded, and she vanished. "Wuntusix, I need to intercept her. Where do I go?"

Wuntusix lifted a trembling fore-hoof and pointed.

I glanced down at my pendant. It lay against my chest in vulnerable gleaming gold splendor. I had Starswirl's avatar break the privacy shield at the edge of the White Tail Woods so he and Michelle could react faster.

I cantered forward, Wuntusix's legs tightening around me. I had no use for stealth now. If anything, I wanted Sevfivtoo to hear me. The sooner I had this confrontation over with, the better.

I touched the chess piece again, but it remained a question mark. Who was my supposed savior? Twilight had spoken of breaking off the battle with the bugbear. Wouldn't her wards have picked up some of the magic the avatar did? Perhaps I had hoped that Twilight would have teleported in at that moment and spared me from having to carry out this insane plan.

Wuntusix gasped. "Sev changed direction. She's coming t-towards us."

I stopped. Only in the ensuing silence did I hear how hard I was breathing. My gaze darted about until I found a small clearing. I stepped into it as I heard a rustling in the underbrush. I had only just positioned myself and turned around when Wuntusix whimpered and shivered hard.

Despite steeling myself to the sight, I still flinched and fought the urge to bolt. The creature entering the clearing looked even larger than it had at the summit. It stood more like Chrysalis, with a pronounced chitin coating on its barrel. It had started to grow a mane and tail. Defined pupils and irises filled its once evenly green eyes. Its horn projected further, the pattern of holes making the tip look disconcertingly like a knife blade.

Despite my heart still pounding, my rage far eclipsed my fear. I scraped a fore-hoof on the ground as if to charge, lowering my head slightly as if to impale it on my horn. Seeing it again, knowing what it had put me through, crystallized all my hate until I could mentally eviscerate Sevfivtoo with it. I almost wished I could translate that thought exercise into actual magic.

"The little not-pony and the little not-changeling," Sevfivtoo said in shockingly dulcet tones. "It should be no surprise to me that I find you two together. Useless attracts useless."

"Not-changeling?" I said, surprising myself at how steady my voice was.

Sevfivtoo stepped towards me, and some of my resolve wavered. "She ceased to be one of my kind when she failed me for the last time. But, then again, I knew she would."

"Wh-what?" Wuntusix said in a tiny voice. "But y-you said it was important that I succeed! That all your plans hinged on it!"

Sevfivtoo sneered. "You idiot. You ceased to be useful when you dispelled the illusion on the camp. Did you seriously think I believed your story about it being an accident? I sent you into Ponyville as Sweetie Belle expecting you to fail. All I wanted was to gauge Princess Twilight's strength and tactics. You were nothing but a tool to me."

I heard a sniffle and felt something wet drip against the fur of my neck. Was Wuntusix crying? I knew she had been on the wrong side, but to have Sevfivtoo express such callous disregard for her sickened me. The guilt I still felt for taking Wuntusix from the castle at least showed I was not so heartless.

It helped me regain some of my emotional strength, and my voice remained steady. "So Twilight was right: you set the bugbear on the train, and then on Ponyville."

Sevfivtoo gave me a contemptuous look. "So you do have a brain after all. I had wondered. Even I cannot control that beast, only direct it. It is looking for the ponies responsible for its incarceration. I convinced it first that its quarry was on the train, and then later in town. I have no idea if that is even true, but, well, the creature is rather dumb. Dumb, but occasionally useful." Her gaze flicked down to the pendant, her lips curling into a predatory smile. "Sort of like you."

My hoof flew to my pendant and pressed it hard to my chest, my heart hammering beneath it.

"I have no idea what prompted you to confront me," said Sevfivtoo. "Nor do I care. You will give me the pendant regardless."

"P-please, Sev," Wuntusix rasped. "Don't do this."

"Do not call me Sev!" Sevfivtoo shouted. "Or Sevfivtoo. Those are names of a lackey, a drone expected to grovel before the great and wise Queen Chrysalis who has done nothing but lead our hive to ruin. If you wish to address me properly, use my new name: Queen Equus Wrath!"

I lowered my hoof and took a step back. "I didn't come here to just give you the pendant!"

"Oh, but you did." Sevfivtoo's horn started to glow, and a chill wracked my body as my eyes became fixated on that sickly green light, the horror of the apartment playing out in my head. "You just don't realize it yet."

The flashback had conditioned me to feel my mind slipping away as the changeling's magic wreaked havoc in my head. I whimpered and nearly toppled off my hooves when reality shattered the illusion with pain and white-hot power blasting through my horn. The changeling's magic flared in hard brilliance, the energies scattered such that they outlined the hemisphere of energy that was my shield.

"Thou shalt not possess this instrument of power, nor what lies within!" Starswirl's avatar thundered.

The attack stopped, and the shield flickered out a moment later. I swayed, Wuntusix's legs tightening their already feeble grip around me. I stumbled and splayed my hooves to steady myself, the pain in my horn fading only slowly.

"Interesting," said Sevfivtoo with a sly smile. "You are to be commended, little not-pony, for getting the avatar to do your bidding."

"I do nopony's bidding," the avatar snarled. "But I am not going to allow thee to have what thou hast no right to possess!"

"Th-that ... that attack ..." I panted, my voice almost as raspy as Wuntusix's. "S-stronger than I expected ..."

The avatar scowled. "Her magic is powerful enough to completely wipe thy mind. Thou wouldst be little more than her puppet."

My heart fell into my stomach. What had I gotten myself into? My gaze darted left and right. Surely this had at least triggered Twilight's wards! The intensity of the mind magic would have been like a damn supernova to anypony looking for it! And yet that infernal chess piece had not changed.

Sevfivtoo's gaze flicked between the avatar and myself. "One wonders, though, where she is getting all this power." She focused on the avatar. "You, obviously, are providing the spell. Shall we go again?"

Her horn started to glow, and I braced myself.

Power surged and pain seared through my horn, and I clenched my teeth to hold back a scream. Sevfivtoo's magic slammed into the shield barely a hoof-span from my head, the shield having closed more tightly around me. Wuntusix yelped and fell off my back with a thud, but I could do nothing to help her.

Candy, stop! Michelle cried out from the pendant.

I whimpered and fell to my knees. "No, I can't ... n-need more time ... we still h-have energy ..."

Thy horn will burn out before it is expended!

Tears welled up and flowed freely to the ground.

I-I am sorry, Candy. Thou hast to let me go.

The ache in my heart eclipsed the pain in my horn. I lowered my head and sobbed. I could not choke out the words, but somehow the message got through. I kept my end of the Pinkie Promise.

Goodbye, Candy. I love thee, always.

The power vanished. I collapsed, shaking so hard that drawing breath became a challenge for a few moments. A thin wisp of smoke trailed from my horn, and I winced at the lingering pain that was slow to abate. I caught ethereal movement out of the corner of my eye, and all I wanted to do was curl up into a ball when I heard Michelle's voice. "Cease thy attack, and I will give myself willingly to thee."

I forced myself to my hooves and stumbled. Wuntusix steadied me, her wings buzzing erratically. I blinked rapidly in a vain attempt to clear my vision, but the tears would not stop.

Michelle stepped between us, her back to me. The avatar drew to my side, and for the first time, he gave me a look of genuine sympathy. My horn was slow to respond, and it ached when it did. I could conduct no more than a trickle of magic through it, insufficient to feel for the chess piece. Did it even matter? The winning move was about to be made, just as had been predicted.

"Do not use thy magic," the avatar said softly. "Thy horn suffereth mana burn. Let it rest for now."

I barely heard him. I lifted a shaking fore-hoof towards Michelle, as if to touch her for one last time, only to whimper in despair when I realized what a futile gesture it was in her spirit state.

"Do you realize what you are doing?" Sevfivtoo said in a sickeningly sweet voice. "You will be completely consumed."

"Yes, I know," said Michelle with a calm that tore my heart. I shivered as the cold certainty settled over me that I was about to watch my friend die a second time. That it would lead to Sevfivtoo's defeat almost didn't matter anymore.

"And why do you simply wish to give yourself to me in this manner?"

The avatar frowned, but did not move from where he stood. I bit my lip hard to suppress a sob as the pendant started to glow, blocked from Sevfivtoo's view by Michelle.

"Because I do not wish my friend to be hurt," said Michelle. "That is something thou wilt likely never understand."

"Oh, I know all about friendship, my dear," Sevfivtoo said. "It is extremely useful to my kind."

The glow of the pendant brightened, and I alternately wanted to tell Michelle goodbye and scream for her to stop. Fear, guilt, and anguish dredged up thoughts I had believed banished, like the wish that I had never come to Equestria, that it would have been better to let me die in the alleyway.

Wuntusix drew herself forward. She looked up at me with what I wanted to believe was sorrow or sympathy. She glanced at the pendant, then at Michelle. She swallowed hard, uttering a soft whimper as she pressed her back against my fore-legs, quaking as if chilled to the bone.

"But enough of this," Sevfivtoo declared. "Have your little not-pony friend release the pendant to me now."

Several things happened at once.

The pendant burst into blinding golden light.

A green glow suffused Sevfivtoo's horn.

Michelle dissolved into a diffuse blob of sparkling light.

I felt a tingling along my fore-legs, and Wuntusix was no longer there.

And when it was over, spirit and matter had collided in a mass of coruscating magic and shrill screams.

"CHERRY, NO!!" I cried.

The avatar gasped, and the glow of the pendant abruptly died, its hoarded energies never released.

The writhing form of Wuntusix, surrounded by both a pale white light and the green glow of Sevfivtoo's levitation magic hung suspended between us. Its shape became a diffuse blob with ill-defined legs, neck, and head. Sevfivtoo threw it to the side, and it crashed to the ground, the white energy still enveloping it.

My mind reeled as I looked on in horror. The body writhed and twitched as if it were straining to become one thing or another and succeeding at nothing. "What happened?!" I turned to the avatar. "What happened?!"

The avatar paled. "I believe ... Cherry's spirit was projected into Wuntusix instead."

I recoiled and galloped to the fallen body. I stumbled, and something clattered to the ground. I fell to my knees beside the body. "D-did Cherry ... is she ...?"

"I do not know what is happening," the avatar said. "It is almost as if the transformation is stalled. I have not seen something like this before."

"Well, well," Sevfivtoo said in dulcet tones. "It appears Wuntusix served a purpose after all. So much for whatever it was you were planning."

"Thou art an idiot to use Wuntusix as thy shield," the avatar growled. "Cherry's spirit is no longer useful to thee."

"Stop talking nonsense." Sevfivtoo started towards us. "Once I have the pendant, I can retrieve her spirit from this body. And as for blaming me for this turn of--"

She stopped when her fore-hoof knocked into something lying on the ground. She looked down and raised an eyebrow. Behind her, a form moved silently in the thick of the trees. I rose to my hooves, my heart racing.

Sevfivtoo frowned. She levitated the object until it hovered before her eyes. It was the chess piece. It must have come loose from my mane when I had stumbled.

It was shaped like Queen Chrysalis.

"What is this?" Sevfivtoo demanded.

I clenched my teeth. "Checkmate, you bitch."

The piece shattered into a thousand shards as violent green fire enveloped the would-be Queen Equus Wrath, who uttered a scream that echoed through the forest and sent birds scattering.

Sevfivtoo was lifted into the air and hurtled into the nearest tree, sundering the trunk to an almost deafening crack. She was back on her hooves almost as soon as she hit the ground, but a snarling Queen Chrysalis strode forward, another blast of brilliant light erupting from her horn and bathing the wayward changeling in more burning green hell.

"You traitor!" Chrysalis roared. "You insolent--" She lifted Sevfivtoo and slammed her into the ground. "--disloyal--" And again. "--murderous--" And again. "--useless little worm! How DARE you try to usurp my rule!"

The avatar stepped up to me. "This was thy plan??" he said in an incredulous voice.

I didn't answer, as I was staring at Sevfivtoo. She was shrinking. Only then did I see that the magical energy was now flowing into Chrysalis rather than from her. "Well, well, Sevfivtoo," said Chrysalis in a sweet voice and a sly smile. "To use your own words, I guess you served a purpose after all. All this additional energy you collected will be quite useful back at the hive."

She stopped, and the changeling that fell limp to the ground was no bigger than Wuntusix had been. The creature shivered and panted, struggling to rise to its hooves.

I turned towards Chrysalis. "Wait a minute! You heard her say that?"

Chrysalis turned to me, even as she picked up Sevfivtoo in her magic and slammed her into the tree again, far harder than I had ever done to Wuntusix. Sevfivtoo fell to the ground in a heap, out cold, or perhaps dead. I could only hope for the latter.

Chrysalis smiled. "Of course I did. I was here soon after I sensed Sevfivtoo using her mind magic on you."

"And you didn't do anything?!"

Chrysalis stepped towards me. "I had to see how your little battle played out first. After all, I had to know when a good opportunity arose to both punish my drone and get the pendant for myself."

My eyes widened, and I stumbled back a step. "I'm not giving it to you!"

Chrysalis threw her head back and laughed. "As if you have a choice this time!"

I looked back towards the fallen form of Wuntusix. Or Michelle. I had no idea of either of their fates. The body still glowed, still writhed, still distorted and distended as if in debate about what to become. I pointed a hoof at it. "Look, there's something wrong with the pendant! It doesn't work right after all. Even Starswirl said--"

Chrysalis chuckled. "Nice try, little not-pony. Even I can sense chaos magic at work."

"Wh-what??" I whirled around to face the avatar.

The image of Starswirl scowled. "It is unfortunately true. I sense chaos magic as well. I do not know to what end."

Chrysalis suddenly loomed over me. "Now, give the pendant to me. With this new infusion of energy my wayward drone has so graciously provided, my hive is ready to rise again! And with this pendant, finally, nothing will stop me! Soon, all of Equestria will be under my control, and its little ponies will provide enough energy to last my hive until the end of time itself!"

In a single flash of light, the other half of the clearing was suddenly occupied by a large stage.

A podium rose from the center, and Discord stood behind it. A gold statuette of a pony sat atop it to one side. Discord lifted an envelope. "And now, the moment you've all been waiting for, the Academy Award for the Largest Ham Among Recurring Villains! And the winner is ..." He opened the envelope and pulled a card from it. "Queen Chrysalis!" Applause roared through the clearing. He snapped his talons, and Chrysalis suddenly appeared on stage next to him. "Say a few words for us, Chryssie!"

"What is the meaning of this?!" Chrysalis cried.

Discord rolled his eyes. "Really, what's with villains who insist on saying that? Even I never said that. Who writes your lines, anyway? Some weird fan-fic author, I'll bet."

"I do not have time for this nonsense," Chrysalis snarled. She flew from the stage and landed with a ground-shaking thud right before me, my heart leaping into my throat. "I want that pendant!"

Discord waved his paw. He and the stage disappeared. He reappeared standing next to Chrysalis. He slapped her on the back of her neck, laughing, sparks flying from where he touched her. "Oh, Chryssie, you little scamp! You're always so predictable." His mouth twisted into a frown. "Which means you're dreadfully boring. What say you do something totally off-the-wall and utterly random, like, oh, not taking the pendant?"

"You would deny me when it was you who told me about my disloyal drone's intent to Ascend? Have you not interfered enough with my plans?!"

"Oh, but my dear Chryssie--"

"And don't call me Chryssie!"

Discord sighed. "And here I thought you would be far more fun." He snapped his talons, and the still unconscious Sevfivtoo appeared draped over Chrysalis' barrel. He reached behind him and pulled out a large can labeled "BUG SPRAY." He squirted it at Chrysalis, enveloping her and Sevfivtoo in a large poofy cloud of white. When the cloud dissipated, both changelings were gone. Discord tossed the can behind him and folded his arms. "Probably won't even thank me for the free trip back to their hive. I am so unappreciated."

I marched up to him. "You want to be appreciated?! Fine!" I thrust a hoof at Wuntusix's body. "Tell me what's going on!"

The avatar stepped up. "Yes, o foul Lord of Chaos, tell us what evil thou hast wielded here!"

Discord smirked. "Starswirl, you were a no-fun fuddy-duddy back then and you're still one now." He gestured at the body. "I simply gave them a third option."

I stared at the fallen changeling. The random morphing slowed, settling into a more definite pony-shape.

"There should be no option!" the avatar roared. "Using this pendant can come only to a bad end! Wuntusix may have been a changeling, but she deserveth better to have her spirit ejected from her body simply because Sevfivtoo used her as a shield!"

My eyes remained riveted to the now still form on the ground. The white energy that had cloaked it like a diffuse cocoon now swirled and undulated around its form as if refining it.

"Except she didn't," said Discord.

I wrenched my gaze from the body as the avatar said, "What nonsense is this? We all saw for ourselves what happened!"

"Shall we look at the instant replay?" Discord conjured a glowing square in the air, inside which the events in the clearing spun backwards at high speed, audio squealing like a tape being played in reverse.

I flinched as I saw myself in freeze-frame, tears flowing down my face, Wuntusix cowering before me. Discord waved a paw, and the scene advanced in slow motion. My eyes widened as I saw Wuntusix leap into the air, her face a mask of pain, fear, and determination as she struggled to pump her wings.

I watched Michelle prepare to project herself.

I saw Wuntusix twist herself around, turning as if to face Michelle.

I witnessed Michelle project herself into Wuntusix.

And only then did Sevfivtoo's levitation magic take hold. The tingling against my legs that I had mistaken for Sevfivtoo's magic had been Wuntusix madly fluttering her wings.

I stared at that same spot in the air long after Discord had dispelled the replay. "W-wuntusix ... sh-she ... she sacrificed herself ..."

"Not quite," said Discord. "While that was her intent, Cherry is as stubborn as you, and that's saying a lot. She refused to be responsible for destroying Wuntusix's spirit, and Wuntusix refused to let Cherry destroy herself."

"H-how is that even possible?!" I turned to the avatar. "Twilight never said that the spirit had any say in what happened!"

The avatar frowned. "Normally, she would not. Yet Cherry hath utilized magic in the pendant before. Witness how she alerted Discord to the pendant's presence against my wishes. It is possible she learned more than she let on."

"But what does it ... d-does it mean she's ..."

I trailed off when the last of white energy dissipated. An earth pony with peach-colored fur and a bright, wavy red mane and tail lay motionless upon the grass. I stared until I saw her sides rise and fall in slow, steady breaths.

"What was this 'third option' of yours?" the avatar asked in a suspicious voice.

"I gave them the chance to merge their spirits how they saw fit," said Discord.

"What?!"

"Oh, did the great and powerful Stardolt the Bleary never think of that?"

"That is utter madness!"

"What's a little madness between friends?"

I stepped up to the peach-and-red mare, my heart hammering. I bent down and nearly fell with as hard as I was shaking. Was it her, or had Discord created some sort of patchwork creature that I would never recognize as having ever been my friend? I reached a trembling hoof to her and touched her shoulder. "Ch-cherry?"

An ear twitched. A fore-hoof wiggled. Her eyelids fluttered and slowly opened, revealing two beautiful green eyes. She drew a deep breath and let it go.

"Cherry, is that you??"

"Candy," she whispered. Her lips curled slowly into a smile. "Yes, it is me." She closed her eyes and took another deep breath. "I had almost forgotten what it was like to breathe again."

My heart soared, and tears streamed down my face. It was her voice, just like I always remembered it. She opened her eyes, and I looked deeply into them. It was her. It was her. "C-can you stand? Do you need help?"

The avatar stepped over to us. "Candy, I warn thee, we do not yet know what chaos magic hath wrought here."

"Well, it wrought pretty well for me when it saved my life and made me into a pony!" I snapped at him before turning back to Michelle. No, Cherry. She was a pony now, same as me.

Cherry slowly rose on shaking legs. I caught her when she stumbled. One of my fore-legs had wrapped around her chest, and I felt her heart beating strong and sure. "Sorry," Cherry said sheepishly. "I am not used to this form."

I smiled. "Just take it easy. You'll get the hang of it soon."

"Thou art very kind." Cherry blinked, then frowned at Discord. "Discord! I had asked thee if thou couldst correct my diction into something more colloquial!"

Discord grinned and shrugged. "Could. Didn't. You sound more amusing this way."

I giggled. "It's okay, you can learn."

"What of the spirit of Wuntusix?" the avatar asked. "How hath she merged with thee?"

"It is difficult to explain," said Cherry as she balanced herself properly on her hooves. "I had much trouble convincing her not to let her spirit simply depart. She liveth on in me like a voice in the back of my mind. She can see and experience life through me, and I have access to her memories. I believe I could channel her if she truly wished to speak herself."

"She doth not feel imprisoned?"

"She hath been a follower all her life," said Cherry. "She knoweth no other existence. To her, this is the same. This is what she wanted. She is ... happy, perhaps for the first time in a long while."

I knew exactly how that felt. I was smiling so hard my muzzle ached. I drew Cherry into a hug, not just to show my love for her, but to convince myself she was real. Fresh tears welled up in my eyes as she hugged me back. Despite her new form, her touch felt so wonderfully familiar, as if we had both been ponies all along.

"I am so sorry I doubted thee, Candy," Cherry said softly.

I sniffled as I drew back. "No, don't be. I had no idea this would work, and I never expected Wuntusix would do what she did. Or that Discord would help."

"You're welcome!" Discord called out.

I rolled my eyes. "Fine. Thank you. Though I could've done without how insanely obtuse your clues were."

"Thou needest to answer one more question, o Lord of Chaos," said Starswirl's avatar. "Why?"

Discord raised an eyebrow. "Why what?"

"Why didst thou assist at all? What ends doth this spectacle achieve for thee?"

Discord spread his arms. "Why must everypony insist I have ulterior motives?"

"Because you always do," I said.

Before Discord could reply, a flash of teleportation magic illuminated the trees. Twilight took but a single step before she stared in utter shock. "What in--?! Candy?? What are you doing here? And ... Discord?!"

I rushed up to her. "Twilight, what about the bugbear?! Is everything all right in Ponyville?"

Twilight hesitated in what I hoped was just lingering shock. "Oh, um, yes, we were just wrapping up, and I took a chance Sevfivtoo might still be where I last detected her." She gasped as her gaze fell on my horn. "Candy, why do you have mana burn?!"

The avatar stepped over to us. "Because thy friend here did something either very brave or very foolish. I have yet to decide which."

Cherry stepped carefully towards us. "Does it matter, Starswirl? Everything came out right in the end."

Twilight turned her gaze towards Cherry. "Who are you?"

I smiled. "Twilight, this is Cherry. My friend is alive again!"

Twilight's pupils shrank to points before she lifted her head and shouted, "Will somepony please tell me what in Equestria is going on?!"

Discord grinned and ticked off points on his talons as he spoke. "Sevfivtoo was defeated by Queen Chryssie, who won an Academy Award for her performance, Wuntusix decided not to be a pawn anymore, and Cherry is alive again thanks to a little help from the most handsome and dashing draconequus in Equestria."

The avatar narrowed his eyes and snorted.

Discord waved his paw. "Oh, and Barswirl the Seedy here stood around and harrumphed a lot."

Twilight stared. "Chrysalis was here?! This is making no sense!"

"Do try to keep up, Twilight," said Discord in a silky voice. "Even though you're rather--" A party hat appeared on Twilight's head. "--late for the party."

Twilight frowned and knocked the hat off her head with a hoof.

I turned to Discord. "But was Sevfivtoo really defeated? Was she still alive when--"

Discord sighed. "Really, you worry too much."

Cherry touched my shoulder. "Candy, I can answer that."

Twilight blinked. "You can?"

"Remember, I have Wuntusix's memories."

Twilight gaped. "You do??"

"Chrysalis is not ... very kind to drones who act in this manner," said Cherry. "She will likely wipe Sevfivtoo's mind and re-purpose her as a menial drone, the lowest she can go in their hierarchy."

"And what of the energy Chrysalis extracteth from her wayward changeling?" the avatar asked. "Have we substituted one enemy for another?"

Discord raised his claw. Green flames danced upon it. "Chryssie doesn't have quite as much energy as she thinks she does." He smirked and let the flames turn different colors before he waved them away. "That's what she gets for being such a crashing bore."

Twilight marched up to Discord. "I want to know exactly what your role was in all this!"

Discord reached behind him and pulled out a pocket-watch. "My, look how late it is!" The watch sprouted wings and flew away. "Time just flies when you're having fun!"

"Discord!" Twilight growled. "So help me, if you purposely put Candy in danger--!"

A window shade popped into existence above Discord's head. "Now, now, Twilight, why can't you just bask in the glow of a happy ending for a bit before you get all riled up for answers?" He grabbed the pull cord of the shade. "Toodles!"

He pulled the shade down. It immediately snapped back up, Discord having vanished. The shade spun a few times before it disappeared as well.

Twilight sighed and shook her head.

I stepped up to her. "Twilight, all I care about right now is that this is finally over."

"Not quite," said the avatar in a low voice. "There is still the matter of the final disposition of this infernal artifact." His gaze flicked over to Cherry and I, and his face became subdued. "But I feel I have worn out my welcome for now."

"Starswirl, please, wait," Cherry said.

The avatar closed his eyes and disappeared.

Cherry sighed. "As much as we were at odds with one another, I hope he is all right."

"We'll deal with that later," said Twilight. "Candy is right. What matters now is that you're both safe."

"But what about my horn?" I asked. "Did I injure it permanently?"

Twilight stepped closer to me. "Are you in pain?"

"Not anymore. Just aches when I try to use it, and I can't get much magic through it."

"You really ought to have a doctor check it to be safe, but I can look." Her horn glowed, and I felt a tingle in my own. "I think you did the equivalent of giving yourself a nasty sprain. I don't sense any permanent damage, but your magic may be weak for a while until you recover. Most cases like this take about a week or two to fully heal. There's no specific treatment other than resting your horn."

I uttered a sigh of relief. Cherry smiled as she drew alongside me.

Twilight turned to her. "Cherry, I don't exactly know what happened yet, but ... I-I ..." She took a deep breath as her voice caught. "I'm very happy you're alive again. I'm so sorry I couldn't do it myself. I really wanted to. I knew how much you mean to Candy and--"

Cherry drew Twilight into a hug. "Please, Princess, do not despair. Thine intent was never in doubt."

Twilight's smile widened. When she drew back, she wiped a tear from her eye. "Candy, if I teleport all of us back to Ponyville now, I think we'll have just enough time to make the wedding."

I exchanged a look with Cherry. She gave me a soft smile and said, "It is up to thee."

"If it's all the same to you, Twilight," I said. "I think we'll walk back to Ponyville. She needs to get used to her new body and ... well ... we kinda have a lot of catching up to do."

"I understand," said Twilight. "Please, both of you come to the castle when you get back into town so I can learn exactly what happened."

"We will, I promise."

Twilight gave us both another quick hug before she stepped back and disappeared in a flicker of magic.

Cherry and I turned to each other and spoke at once.

"Cherry, I'm really sorry for anything I said that--"

"Candy, I wish to express my sincere apologies to thee for--"

We stared at each other for a few seconds and laughed. "Let's just assume everything is forgiven and go from there." I said.

Cherry giggled. It was the most beautiful sound in the universe. She ducked her head, letting a bang of red hair drop over one eye. "I still feel I need to make it up to thee."

"Oh, that's easy. Just let me introduce you to the Crusaders."

Cherry blinked. "Um ... ah ..."

I smirked. "Yes?"

"It that really necessary?"

"Oh, you think you're going to get off that easy, fellow blank-flank?" I chuckled. "I'm just teasing you. But don't be surprised if they find you."

Cherry smiled. "We should start back towards Ponyville. It will likely take me awhile as I get used to walking on hooves."

"We have all the time in the world now, Cherry," I said softly. "Finally."

Author's Note

There's one more chapter left to tie up some loose ends, and that will conclude Part Two. Then there will be a (MUCH SHORTER) Part Three to close out the story. Thank you to all my readers who stuck with the story so far. Its reception has FAR exceeded all my expectations.

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Chapter 44 - Reasons And Intent

For the first time since arriving in Equestria, I could look back with some fondness on those first few awkward days as I sat in Twilight's castle with Cherry while she ate her first meal as a pony. At the very least, I could reassure her that nopony minded her dipping her muzzle into her food.

When I saw her looking longingly at the glass of apple juice by her plate, I smiled and said, "Just close your hooves around it like this." I pantomimed the action.

Cherry nodded and attempted to follow my lead, the glass wobbling a bit.

"Grab it a little further back from the edges of your hooves. You won't have to hold it really tight, since there's a kind of stickiness there."

Cherry smiled as she lifted the glass, only to gasp as it slipped halfway to her lips. I tried to grab it, but my horn was too slow to respond. Rarity snatched it with her magic just before it could crash to the table.

I rubbed a hoof through my mane. "Um, okay, maybe you do have to hold it a little tighter. Sorry."

"It's okay," Cherry said as she clamped her hooves more firmly around the glass. She glanced at Rarity. "I thank thee."

"No trouble at all, darling," said Rarity. After Cherry managed to raise the glass to her lips, Rarity grabbed a napkin in her magic, rolled it up, and bopped me on the head with it.

"Hey!" I cried. "What was that for?"

"That was for trying to use your injured horn," Rarity said, wagging the napkin at me like a human might wag a finger. "After the doctor told you to stop using it until it healed."

The moment I had set hoof back in Ponyville, Rarity had praised me for my bravery, then switched to Mom-mode and read me the riot act as she marched me to the hospital. Cherry had thought the whole incident very amusing. "The doctor didn't tell me to stop using it, he just said to take it easy."

"Well, I'm telling you not to use it, young lady," said Rarity. "Or would you prefer to be grounded for the duration?"

"No," I groaned.

"Then you'll do as I say."

I sighed dramatically. Cherry giggled.

I turned my head as I heard hoof-falls in the hallway. My eyes wandered to the pendant around Twilight's neck as she and Applejack entered the room. When she had offered earlier to take the pendant, I had wasted no time in divorcing myself from it.

"Hello, everypony," said Twilight.

"Howdy, all," said Applejack. She turned to Cherry. "I gotta head back ta the homestead, sugarcube, but ya can come on over whenever yer ready."

Cherry smiled and nodded. "I thank thee, Applejack. I will be done shortly."

I raised an eyebrow. "What's this?"

"Applejack hath agreed to take me in for a while, at least until I acclimate a bit more."

"Oh, um, okay," I said.

Rarity must have heard the disappointment in my voice, as she lay a hoof on my shoulder. "I wish we could put her up, but we simply don't have the space at the boutique."

"I wouldn't mind sharing my room with her."

"I know, but ... well ..." Rarity's gaze flicked to Cherry.

"I requested it, Candy," said Cherry in a soft voice.

"You did?"

"It is not that I do not wish to be around thee, but I thought this a better fit for what I have become."

"That's kinda what I figgered, too," said Applejack. "She's an earth pony, so it jus' makes sense she spend time around other earth ponies. Kinda like how it was good ya spent so much time 'round other unicorns til ya got the magic stuff down."

I nodded slowly. "I guess I could see that, yeah."

Cherry smiled. "And it's not like I'm moving away. I'll just be at the farm. Thou canst visit me as much as thou wishest."

"Mebbe we can work on her speech, too," said Applejack.

Rarity gave her a wry grin. "Yes, I'm sure the Apple family can have her speaking like a proper country bumpkin in no time."

Applejack smirked. "Very funny. Well, I'll see ya in a bit, Cherry. If somepony would be so kind as ta escort her ta the farm later, I'd be mighty obliged."

"I'm sure Candy and I can do that," said Rarity.

Applejack tipped her hat and headed out. I watched her go before I turned to Cherry. "Um, that kinda reminds me of something I wanted to ask you. Did you have a choice of what kind of pony to become?"

"Yes, I did," said Cherry.

"And you chose an earth pony? I mean, there's nothing wrong with that, just ... well, it would've been nice if we could practice magic together."

"It is hard to explain. It simply felt right for me." Cherry grinned. "Thou always sayest I was very 'down to earth' in our world."

I rolled my eyes. "Ha, ha."

"I suppose a better explanation is, after everything that happened, I needed to feel grounded or anchored again."

Yeah, that was totally her. If I had any doubts that this was really my old friend, that would have dispelled them.

"I think an earth pony is an excellent fit for you, dear," said Rarity.

Twilight took a seat at the table. "And I can't think of a better place for her to become acclimated to life in Equestria than Applejack's farm."

I smirked. "You know, Cherry, you could've become a changeling and looked however you wanted."

"Now who is trying to be funny?" Cherry said with a wry grin. "In truth, I had considered it, and Discord had encouraged it. Again, it came down to desiring that anchor."

Spike emerged from the kitchen. "Cherry, can I get you anything else?"

"No, I believe I have enough, Spike, I thank thee," said Cherry.

"Anypony else want anything?"

"Some tea, please," said Twilight. "Something relaxing."

"Coming right up!" Spike turned on his heel and scurried back into the kitchen.

Rarity turned to Twilight. "It has been a trying day, has it not?"

Twilight glanced at one of the windows. The moon hung low in the sky, having risen a short while ago. "I'm just a bit tired."

"Once Cherry has finished her meal, we'll all get out of your hair so you can get some rest."

Twilight smiled. "It's okay, I don't mind having you here. I meant what I said at the wedding."

"I did wonder what had come over you," said Rarity. "Since you had yet to tell me what happened in the forest at the time."

I tuned them out. Cherry became my complete focus. I wanted to imprint her new appearance in my mind. It would be hard to displace her old look.

"Is something wrong?" Cherry asked.

I blinked. "Um, no. Sorry. Just ... you're different now. I mean, the way you look, not, um ..."

"I am different," Cherry said softly. "And not just appearance."

An unbearable silence reigned until I could no longer stand it. "Oh, but ... yeah, of course. Lots of things change when you're a pony."

"I don't mean that."

I sighed. "Yeah, I know, but I could always hope."

Cherry reached a hoof towards me. I didn't hesitate to touch mine to hers. "What I told thee about moving on, about letting go, it still holdeth true, just in a different way. Thou dost not need me--"

I swallowed. "Ch-cherry, don't say that, I--"

"Please, let me finish. Thou dost not need me as thy counsel." She smiled. "But I would be most pleased if thou wouldst continue to be my friend. Our relationship must change. In many ways, it hath changed already. Thou not only standest on thine own, but thou hast someone ... ah, somepony to provide what I once did."

She glanced past me, and I gazed affectionately at Rarity as she chatted with Twilight. Cherry was right. Rarity now held the place in my heart Cherry once had when she acted as a sort of surrogate for my birth mother. I reminded myself what Fluttershy had said when I had expressed my fears she would feel ignored if I spent more time with others. This was really no different.

As if echoing my thoughts, Cherry said, "Thou canst not rearrange thy life for me. If anything, thou hast been too closely tied to me out of necessity."

"Just reassure me, please," I said in a quavering voice. "That you didn't choose to be an earth pony or stay with Applejack's family just to separate us."

"Not at all," said Cherry without hesitation or breaking eye contact. "I did what was best for me, and I would expect thee to do no less for thyself."

I smiled and drew her into a hug.

I heard a clop of hooves as Rarity left her seat. "I believe we should see Cherry over to Sweet Apple Acres."

I turned to her. "Yeah, it's getting late. I'm kinda tired, too."

"Oh!" Twilight said. "I just heard from Starswirl's avatar. He wants to address us."

Rarity yawned. "Can't it wait until morning?"

"He says it's urgent."

"And I wish to know if he is all right," said Cherry.

Twilight glanced down at her pendant, and her horn glowed. The avatar materialized next to her, his face drawn into a frown. It eased as he gazed at Cherry. "I trust thou art getting along well?"

Cherry smiled. "Yes, I am doing fine. It will take me time to get used to this form, but I have a lot of friends who will help."

At the word "friends", the avatar's face became sad, and he uttered a long sigh. "That is good. I wish thee well, Cherry, as this is the last time we will speak."

Cherry's smile faded. "What? Th-this is goodbye?"

"I don't understand," said Twilight. "You'll no longer manifest after this?"

The avatar turned to her, eyes glistening. "No, Princess. What I mean is, I am ending my existence."

"What??" I cried.

"You cannot be serious!" Rarity said, aghast. "You would end your own life?!"

"S-Starswirl," Cherry said in a quavering voice. "Please, don't do this."

The avatar scowled. "Stop it. Thy sentiment is misplaced. I am not a spirit. I am not and never have been alive. I am but a figment of the real Starswirl. And it is the only way to deactivate the artifact permanently."

Twilight raised her hoof to the pendant in a gesture eerily reminiscent of my own. "But why?! Why destroy yourself? Why destroy the pendant?"

"I have given thee the answer to thy first question!" the avatar growled. "As to the second, as long as it exists, somepony will desire it."

"But if it can be fixed--" Twilight began.

"Absolutely not!" Starswirl's avatar thundered. "It was that thinking which began this sordid mess in the first place!"

"Hey, who's doing all the shouting in here?" said Spike as he stepped into the room. "Do I need to put on more water for -- gahh!" Spike zipped behind Twilight. "What is that, a ghost?!"

The avatar raised an eyebrow.

Twilight rolled her eyes. "No, Spike, this is just a manifestation of Starswirl, like I told you about."

"Um, okay," Spike said, stepping out from behind Twilight. "Does he want any tea?"

"Uh, I don't think so."

"Okay. I'll, um, just be in the kitchen then."

He zipped away.

"Dost thou realize thou hast a dragon in thy castle, Princess?" the avatar said.

"Yes, he's my beloved friend and assistant," said Twilight.

The avatar frowned. "New alicorns, princesses who doth not hold court, dragons running amok. What hath this world come to?"

Rarity tossed her mane. "Much good, I would say, if your attire is representative of the fashion of your day."

Cherry's eyes glistened. "Starswirl ..."

"Do not call me that," said the avatar. "I never truly was him."

Cherry frowned. "I will call thee Starswirl as that is what I have come to know thee as, and by thine own insistence! Thou canst not tell me how to feel." She gave me a forlorn look. "It never works."

My throat tightened, and I had no words for them. I had little doubt I was the last pony the avatar wanted to hear from.

The avatar sighed, his expression softening. "No, I suppose I cannot."

"Thou shared thy pain with me," Cherry said.

"A mere echo of pain, dearest Cherry. Perhaps it should have died with the real Starswirl."

"You never destroyed a magical artifact," Twilight said. "That is, the real Starswirl never did. Why would you? Like anything potentially dangerous, it can be protected."

The avatar paused before turning to face her. "Thou dost not need it." He hesitated, glancing away for a moment. "Dost thou wish me to say it? Very well! Thou art better than Starswirl!"

Twilight's pupils shrank. "Really?"

"Thou dost not need this pendant. Thou knowest everything about how it works, and more."

"Not everything," said Twilight. "Why did Starswirl create it? Was it to help his dying friend Far Seer?"

The avatar started to pace. "Starswirl had already become interested -- no, obsessed -- with the magic behind life and spirit as so many of his friends passed on from age or circumstance. When Far Seer revealed that he had foreseen his own death, it lit a fire in Starswirl's heart, and he committed himself to defeating death itself."

"But then why is there no record of Far Seer's illness in his own journal?"

"Because Starswirl expunged it."

Twilight's mouth fell open. "But I checked for that sort of concealment!"

The avatar smirked. "Heh. Perhaps Starswirl did manage to best thee at something. Regardless, he wished to leave no clues as to what he had done."

"But whatever for?" Rarity said. "Isn't the desire to save the life of a friend a noble one?"

The avatar frowned and jabbed a hoof towards the pendant. "He failed to create life from non-life but forged ahead and created this abomination! He knew this would require a living, breathing, sapient host! And yet he created it anyway! Only when Far Seer would have no part in it did Starswirl realize his mistake. And to compound it, he nearly made an even more colossal blunder."

Spike peeked into the room, a tray and tea set perched on his claws. "Is this a bad time to bring in the tea?"

Twilight levitated the tray to the table. "It's fine, Spike, thank you."

"Starswirl became Far Seer's final caregiver, keeping him as comfortable as possible," the avatar continued. "Starswirl was ready to destroy the pendant until, in the fevered delirium that accompanied the final phase of the illness, Far Seer delivered vivid predictions of future calamities that could destroy Equestria. That was when Starswirl made his final mistake, when he believed he could ... that he should maketh himself immortal to continue to offer his wisdom to the coming ages and prevent these potential disasters."

"Um, Twilight?" Spike said in a tentative voice.

Twilight levitated her tea cup, not taking her eyes from the avatar. "Not now, Spike."

I heard a faint slurping noise but ignored it and asked, "Is that why he never destroyed the pendant?"

"Indeed," said the avatar. "The desire to fix the pendant somehow and achieve his original goal consumed the rest of his life. It strained his relationship with Celestia and Luna when he became jealous of their Ascension into immortal beings."

"But he never actually used the pendant in this form," said Twilight.

"But, Twilight--" Spike said again.

"Shhh!" Twilight hissed back.

"Not until it was used on me," said Cherry in a small voice.

"What difference doth it make?!" the avatar thundered.

"Why, it makes a great deal of difference!" Rarity declared. "He kept true to his morals in that he would not displace a spirit from its rightful body just to further his own life!"

"Twilight!" Spike cried.

Twilight sighed. "Spike! Can't you see we're having an important conversation?"

He twiddled his claws. "Yeah, but--"

"But what?"

"Your tea is drinking itself."

Twilight stared at him, then dropped her gaze to her teacup and gasped. "What?!"

She lowered the cup. The tea within steadily drained to a now very distinct slurping sound. Twilight turned the cup around, and her face twisted into a frown. "Discord!"

A painted image of the draconequus on the side of the cup now stepped into full view. "Really, Twilight, you ought to talk to Fluttershy. She has much better taste in tea than you do." The tiny image of Discord snapped his talons. He vanished from the side of the cup and appeared full size standing on the table.

I didn't even flinch. Really, this insanity was becoming routine for me.

Twilight face-hoofed. "Discord, we're trying to talk to Starswirl's avatar! He was telling us the rest of the story behind the pendant."

Discord gave Twilight an imperious look. "Yes, fine, I'll let your little exposition fairy here continue. I'm here at Fluttershy's request, if you must know. Far be it from me to interrupt his little pity party."

"Pity party?!" the avatar roared.

"Oh, so you're not going on and on about woe to Starswirl and the terrible evil he hath wrought, and please let me atone for it?"

"This is not atonement," said the avatar. "There can be no atonement for those whom are dead and gone."

Discord smirked. "It's like I said before: you have no idea how to have fun. Why, even atonement can be fun! Or hadn't you been paying attention to what I've been doing all this time?"

"Whatever are you talking about?" Rarity asked.

I frowned. "Oh, he better not be talking about everything he did concerning me and the pendant!"

Discord grinned and waved a paw. The word "WINNER!" appeared over my head in flashing neon. Canned applause sounded, and confetti rained down on me.

"You? Atone for something?" Rarity said as she helped me get the detritus out of my mane. "And atone for what?"

Discord waved his arms. "Oh, you know. This and that. Trivial stuff, really, not worth talking about."

Rarity narrowed her eyes. "Try again."

Discord frowned and folded his arms tightly. "And-sending-an-artifact-to-another-world-which-caused-somepony-to-get-killed-which-I-never-meant-to-happen-in-the-first-place-and-if-I-didn't-do-anything-Fluttershy-would-eventually-find-out-since-she-always-drags-these-things-out-of-me-and-I'd-never-live-it-down." His last words were wheezed out as he literally turned blue, his eyes crossing. He drew in a massive breath and returned to his normal hue. "Satisfied?"

"Discord," said Cherry in a soft voice. "All that thou didst ... all of thy help ... it was all because thou felt thine actions had caused my death?"

I gave Discord a stunned look. "Is that why you were so upset when I made the sacrificial move in our chess game?"

Discord's gaze narrowed and shifted between Cherry and I. "Maybe," he grunted.

Twilight smiled. "It's what I told you before, Candy. Discord never did anything to intentionally kill anypony, and he did the right thing in the end."

"Hmph," Rarity snorted. "Only after putting everypony through much needless stress!" She turned to Discord. "I ought to give you a piece of my mind for endangering both Candy and Sweetie Belle!"

"You're too late," said Discord. He lowered his voice as he shifted his gaze to the side. "Fluttershy beat you to it."

"Discord?" said Cherry.

Discord raised an eyebrow.

Cherry smiled. "I thank thee from the bottom of my heart."

Discord's expression softened. "You're welcome," he murmured.

Yeah. Totally Cherry. Thanking the very creature that had set up this mess in the first place.

Discord's lips slowly curled into a sly smile. "Saaaay, I have just the way we can make Starcurl the Breezy's bit a lot more fun."

"Oh, dear," Rarity groaned.

"Discord, wait," Twilight said.

Discord waved his claw. "Oh, don't worry, Twilight, your little idol here can finish what he has to say."

"I have said all I had intended," said the avatar. "All that remains is for me to dissipate my essence back into the magical weave of Equestria from whence it came."

Cherry's face fell. "Must thou do this, Starswirl?"

The avatar stepped up to her with a look of affection that I had never thought I would ever see on that face. "Cherry, our paths were never meant to cross. I existed only to protect the pendant and prevent it from being used, and later to protect thee. Now that those responsibilities have been fully executed, there is no purpose for me to continue to exist."

"Except as my friend."

The avatar hesitated. "I ... I have never ..." He took a deep breath. "I thank thee, Cherry. Thou hast lifted a great weight from me. It pained me that I would go knowing thou resented me. I am sorry I could not be the friend thou truly needed."

I uttered a ragged sigh, and my eyes misted. Rarity draped a fore-leg around my barrel and squeezed me gently.

"I realize I can't convince you to stay," said Twilight in a somber voice. "But I do have one more question for you."

The avatar turned to her. "And I know what it is. What of Far Seer's predictions?"

Twilight nodded.

"None came true. Not even close. Now thou understandest the full implication of Starswirl's mistake. He was tempted to use the artifact to his dying breath, and had he used it, he would hath made himself immortal at the expense of others ... for nothing. Perhaps he can be praised for holding to his morals to the end, but it came at the cost of his happiness in his waning days. One of his last actions was to create me to safeguard the artifact, and that work is done. And thus, I am done. It can be no other way."

All my previous anger towards him for his abrasive manner now turned to sympathy. Starswirl had indeed created this avatar at the lowest point of his life. All of his frustration and bitterness -- maybe inadvertently -- had been crystallized into this being. I felt sorry for him; the peace I had achieved with my own emotional turmoil would forever elude him.

Cherry's eyes glistened. "G-goodbye, Starswirl. I thank thee for everything thou hast done."

"Fare thee well, dearest Cherry," said the avatar. To my surprise, he turned to me. "And fare thee well also, Candy Swirl. Cherry hast no friend better than thee."

My heart lurched, and my vision blurred. Rarity hugged me close, and I sniffled once. Spike stepped up to Twilight, his own eyes glistening. Twilight pulled him into a hug.

I thought I even saw Discord look a bit sad.

The avatar lifted his head and closed his eyes. His image became blurred like a camera losing focus. He dissolved into sparkles of light which scattered about the room before fading away.

Cherry lowered her head, and tears dripped silently. I reached over and drew her into a tight hug.

Rarity let out a slow, ragged sigh, and Twilight lowered her head as if in a moment of silence. She flinched when energy suddenly crackled around the pendant like tiny forks of lightning. In a few seconds, they faded away. Twilight lighted her horn. "I-It's done. The thaumic matrix of the pendant has collapsed." She removed it and placed it gently on the table. "And the binding magic is gone. It's just a piece of jewelry now."

I stared at the pendant for what seemed a very long time. I took a deep breath as I remembered in crystal clarity the moment my birth mother had given it to me as a sign of her love. I felt so sorry for her. If she had any inkling about what it really was, I doubted she would have ever given it to me. Cherry would never have died and ...

... and what?

What would I have had? A life going nowhere because I didn't know how to deal with my pain? Living with a relative who didn't give a shit about me? Maybe even coming to hate my birth mother for putting me into that situation? It was almost embarrassing that I couldn't see past the end of my own nose until it became the muzzle of a strange pony body in an even stranger world.

My musings were interrupted when Discord swept down and snatched the pendant in his claw. "Okay, everypony, it's becoming far too much like a wake in here for my liking. So, on to fun!"

"Discord!" Rarity hissed. "Put that down! Regardless of its lack of magic, it's still an important keepsake to Candy. Perhaps she wishes to keep it."

"No," I heard myself say.

Rarity turned to me. "Candy? Are you sure?"

I stared at it one last time. I remembered the tree Apple Bloom had shown me. I finally understood what that little filly was trying to tell me. I had memories nopony could ever take away from me. I didn't need the pendant. My birth mother would have understood.

Perhaps Cherry knew what I was thinking. She always had a knack for that. She lifted her gaze, wiping her eyes with a back of a hoof as she slowly smiled at me and nodded.

"Yes, I'm sure," I said.

Discord grinned and hopped off the table. "Well, there you go!"

"Discord, what are you up to?" Twilight said in a warning tone.

"Doing you all yet another favor. Don't thank me all at once."

"What are you talking about?"

Discord waved his paw, and a huge vertical zipper appeared in the air. "Now you all know this pendant is just a tawdry knick-knack now, but the Queen of the Large Hams doesn't." He pulled the zipper down. It opened into a dark cavern dimly illuminated with sickly green light. Insect-like creatures buzzed in the distance.

Twilight gasped. "Is that ... the changeling hive?!"

"Now I'm going to make a prediction," said Discord with a smirk. "She's gonna see it, give one of her silly speeches about taking over Equestria, and then when the pendant doesn't work, she's going to shout 'Noooooooo!' like the drama queen she is."

"I don't believe this," Twilight murmured.

Discord grinned and stepped through the zipper. "Oh, Chryssiiiieeee! Look at the present I brought yoooou!"

The zipper closed up behind him.

"Doth he always act in such a theatrical manner?" asked Cherry.

"Yes," groaned Twilight, Rarity, Spike, and myself at the same time.

The zipper suddenly opened to the resounding changeling queen cry of "Noooooooo!" as Discord stepped out of it. He closed up the zipper. "So predictable."

"What happened to the pendant?" Twilight asked.

Discord grinned. "She tried to send her magic through it and ... poof! Blew up right in her face. Actually improved her complexion, if you ask me."

The pendant was gone forever. So that was what closure felt like. It felt damn good. "Thank you."

Discord winked at me. He clasped his claw and paw together. "Well, you know what they say, time and chaos wait for no draconequus!" He pulled the zipper down again. Beyond lay a twisted realm of broken land at odd angles and strange colors swirling in the sky. He waved, stepped through, and closed the zipper behind him. It vanished a moment later.

Even after having lived in Ponyville for months now, I still marveled at the utter quiet of the night. The hour was not terribly late, as the moon still sat fairly low in the sky, our shadows long in its silvery light. My birth mother had often joked that in our tiny hometown they would roll up the sidewalks at night. I imagined she would have said the same thing about Ponyville.

"What is it dear?" said Rarity as we headed back to the boutique after dropping off Cherry at Sweet Apple Acres.

"Hmm?" I said in a distracted voice. "What is what?"

"You smiled suddenly. If I've learned anything about teenagers, it's that your ilk rarely smiles spontaneously."

I rolled my eyes, but I grinned just the same. "I was thinking about my original mother back on my world."

"Were you now?"

I heard the cautious tone in Rarity's voice. She assumed that was still a sensitive topic with me. I wasn't sure how to express that I had finally moved on, but that sensitivity was one of the things I loved the most about her. "I was thinking about how easily she made the transition from a small town to a big city. Sort of how I imagine you might be, given how much you go on and on about Manehattan."

She waved a hoof. "I don't talk about it that much."

I smirked. "I think the only reason you don't talk about it even more is because you're so focused on opening another boutique in Canterlot."

Rarity smiled faintly. "Well, the idea of one in Manehattan may have crossed my mind on occasion. Just a fleeting thought."

I grinned, "Uh-huh. Suuure."

"Now don't get sassy with me, it's far too late in the day," she said, though she was smiling. "But what about you?"

"Huh? What about me what?"

"You had to transition the other way, dear."

I snorted. "Uh, right. I changed species in coming here, so naturally what I'd be most worried about is living in a small town. Yep, nailed it."

Rarity simply looked at me and raised a single eyebrow.

"I really hate it when you look at me like that," I groaned.

I lied. I loved it, because it was coming from her. But, hey, I was a teenager, I had to keep up appearances.

"Then maybe you'll answer my question," she said in a lofty voice.

"Oh, fine." I paused as I looked down the empty street. I actually had no ready answer. Well, I had an answer, but I wasn't sure it was the one she wanted to hear. "I do miss some things about living in a big city."

Where she was cautious in approaching the subject of my mother, I was the same towards anything that hinted I might not want to stay in Equestria. Really, it was pretty much a done deal, even if I had not stated as such. That I remained human in my dreams bothered me, but did it really matter? Or was that one last mystery I needed to solve?

Rarity took a deep breath. "Shall we point out the manticore in the room? Candy, do you have any aspirations to return to your own world?"

"I don't exactly have a lot to go back to."

Rarity stopped trotting and turned to face me. "Humor me for a moment, dear, please," she said in a soft, sincere voice. "What if you could return to a good life in your own world. Would you go?"

I hesitated, despite how she might interpret that. I had to hesitate. Maybe it was my penchant for over-complicating things, but I felt reluctant to give her a simple answer. From her tone, I could tell she would be very unhappy to see me go, but I knew she would not stand in my way if I chose to leave. I loved her all the more for it.

"I would like to stay," I said softly.

"That doesn't quite answer the question."

"Yeah, I know."

"Are you worried about something, Candy?" said Rarity.

Damn, she could read me so well. "I guess it's hard for me to shift out of crisis mode. Maybe I keep thinking something will happen to force me to consider leaving. Like, I don't know, not being able to get a cutie mark."

Rarity sighed. "You have indeed been hanging around the Crusaders too much."

"Oh, stop. I pulled that example out of my tail."

"Then if that is the best you can come up with, is it truly something to be worried about?"

Surely I had other reasons, and that was just the only one at hoof. Yet as I wracked my brain, I could not come up with anything else. Every sign I could see pointed to my home being here in Equestria.

Rarity smiled and stepped closer. "You mentioned to me earlier that the mantra you've been operating under is 'think, don't emote.' Perhaps you've taken that as far as you can. What does your heart tell you?"

I smiled. This time I did not hesitate. "That I'll stay with those I've come to love."

She touched a hoof to my shoulder. "And I certainly love you, Candy."

And then, finally, the word came to me as easily as if I had been using it all along. "I love you, too, Mom."

Rarity gasped. "Candy ... d-did you just ... oh, my stars, come here ..."

She drew me into a tight hug, and we simply stood there in the quiet, the only sound that of our breathing. I felt her tremble at first, but the longer we embraced, she steadied and let out a heartfelt sigh.

When she drew back from the embrace, her lovely face seemed to glow in the pale light of the moon, her eyes glistening, a wide smile on her muzzle. Except ...

... the moon was behind her.

Rarity -- Mom -- gave me a suffering look. "Candy, what did I tell you about using your horn?"

I looked up. My horn was glowing, the same mysterious soft radiance that had happened the other night. "I'm not doing it!"

And like before, it faded away.

Mom lifted her gaze to it (honestly, I really liked calling her that). "Hmm. The doctor did say you might have occasional magical discharges while it heals. Perhaps that was one of them. Are you in pain?"

"Not at all. In fact, it kinda felt good."

"Well, I suppose we'll keep an eye on it. For now, we ought to get back."

I smiled. "Sure thing, Mom."

She smiled again, her eyes misting once more.

What had just happened? The same as before? Earlier, I had assumed it to be just something related to the crisis. It could have been nothing, just a random magic discharge. Yet something told me it was more than that.

But ... what?

That was a question for another day. I felt at peace for the first time in a very long while. I fully intended to enjoy it.

Author's Note

And thus concludes Part Two! Part Three will commence in about a week's time. In Part Three, there will be no more fantastic monsters to fight or magical artifacts to decipher, just Candy trying to find her way, discover her calling, and understand the changes in her relationship with Cherry. And with the conclusion of Part Three will be the close of the story.

And as I stated before, it will be a LOT shorter than Part Two.

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Chapter 45 - Sunset

Lyra finally broke herself out of her stunned silence, but not to partake of more of her half-eaten meal of hayburger and fries. Instead, she drew back and stared at me in shock and perhaps a little disbelief. "Wait a minute," she said, lifting a hoof to her forehead. "You're telling me that you used to be one of these creatures?"

I couldn't help but grin as I levitated my hayburger and took a large bite. Maybe she was hanging on my words too much to want to eat, but I wasn't about to deny myself this hard-won indulgence. I admit, I had waited until the very end to drop the final bombshell just to maximize the drama. "Yeah, but to be perfectly honest, I'm not sure my people are the same as the ones you're talking about."

She recoiled slightly. "What, are you serious? You described exactly what I think they look like. Even your friend in the alley looked like them!"

I paused to pop several hayfries into my mouth with the same magical ease as I had before the whole mess with Sevfivtoo. Thanks to not using my horn at all for a week, the doctor said I had healed faster than expected. As a reward, Mom let me have this fast-food repast. As I had suspected, fast-food in Equestria was just as sinfully tasty as it had been on Earth. "Okay, just why did you start believing in them? I never read anything about them in any of the books that Twilight lent me."

The fact that the Equestrian language had no direct translation for the word "human" had made me suspicious from the start. The closest I could come was "hairless monkey," which sounded kind of silly. I wondered if Discord had previously used his world-hopping abilities to play a little trick on poor Lyra.

"Well, I admit, it's pretty obscure," said Lyra as she finally turned her attention back to her meal. "Mostly ancient legends that go back pretty far."

While one of the books Twilight had given me was about ancient myths, I had not delved into it to deeply. I munched on more of my burger before responding. "So no archaeological stuff?"

"Unfortunately, no. The legends go back to before the Diarchy was formed, even before Equestria existed. They talked about these creatures visiting from another land and befriending the ponies here. But once you told me about what you used to be, I'm thinking now that maybe what they had really meant was that they came from another world."

"I dunno what to tell you," I said. "I mean, yeah, there's lots of old stories and myths about strange lands and such in my world, but none of them quite matches Equestria."

"But your world had legends of unicorns and pegasi," said Lyra.

"Yeah, not to mention griffins and dragons."

"So could that be a connection?"

Lyra was really eager for answers, and I wished I could provide them. She had been very patient in waiting for me to be ready to talk about this. "You might be right, but I have no way to know for sure." I paused to slurp down some of my milkshake. "Sorry I couldn't be of more help."

Lyra sighed but smiled faintly as she levitated her burger. "It's okay. At least now I know that they really do exist, and I'm not just crazy. Thank you for talking to me about it."

I finished off the last of my burger and idly swirled the remaining fries in the air. "And thank you for toning it down a bit."

Her smile widened. "I should be thanking you in that regard."

I peeled off a hayfry from their impromptu flight formation and gulped it down. "Hmm?"

"When you, ah, read Bon Bon and I the riot act, you really helped us." She hesitated, glancing to the side. "We had another little spat on the day of Cranky and Matilda's wedding. It's kind of private what it was about, but we smoothed it over a lot faster than we would have if you hadn't talked to us."

I smiled. I actually did feel good that I had helped them, even if that hadn't quite been my intent at the time. I still wasn't sure if it were of the same caliber as "solving a friendship problem" as Pinkie had put it. Either way, though, it was good news for a change.

Everything had been looking up lately. No monsters to fight, no strange artifacts to decipher, no crisis to keep me on edge for days or weeks at a time. Of course, part of me believed that meant that the other horseshoe had yet to drop ...

As if on cue, Lyra grinned and leaned closer to me. "Oh, and that reminds me, I wanted to ask you something. How did you manage to replicate Bon Bon's old dress like that?"

I paused with the last of the hayfries poised before my muzzle. "Um, I didn't."

Lyra chuckled. "Oh, I see. Trade secret, huh?"

I raised an eyebrow. "How about no secret? I did what I said I had done: I patched the dress."

Lyra tilted her head and gave me a dubious look.

"Why do you think I did otherwise?"

"Because the dress is perfect!" Lyra said. "Like it was never damaged in the first place."

"Lyra, if you're trying to be nice to me, I appreciate it, but--"

"No, that's not it at all," said Lyra. "I didn't notice myself until after Bon Bon and I had a lovely dinner together and took a walk in the moonlight afterward. That's when we both noticed how wonderful it looked."

So now I had another theory. I started to suspect that their relationship went a little deeper than a friendship, and Lyra had been distracted by other emotions.

Perhaps my doubt had shown on my face, as Lyra rolled her eyes and said, "Look, talk to Bon Bon yourself if you don't believe me."

I finally finished off the last hayfry and took one last long pull at the straw of my milkshake until it gurgled. "Maybe I will." I hopped off the seat. "Sorry to eat and run, but I have to get back to the boutique."

Lyra nodded and smiled. "Thanks again for taking the time to talk to me."

I levitated a few extra bits onto the table to cover my half of the tip. "No problem. Maybe we can do it again sometime."

"I'd like that. See you around."

I flashed her one last smile before heading away. The more I thought on it, the more I wanted to see that dress for myself. I glanced at the clock on the wall just before I stepped through the doors of the restaurant. If I headed over to Bon Bon's place right away, I just might not be too late getting back to the boutique.

I turned sharply around the corner of the building, and ducked down the alleyway that ran alongside it. I rushed towards the street beyond, hoping this would be a short cut ...

... only to nearly crash into somepony while I was going full gallop.

I skidded to a halt, and only by bumping into the other pony did I manage not to fall onto my muzzle. Out the corner of my eye, something fluttered to the ground, but I ignored it. When I drew back, I was staring not at a pony, but a donkey. A balding and rather upset donkey.

"Watch where you're going!" the donkey snapped, his mouth drawn into a scowl.

"Er, sorry," I said sheepishly.

"You always go around trying to knock poor old donkeys to the ground?"

I sighed and rolled my eyes. "Look, I said I was sorry, okay?"

"Lemme guess, you're a teenager," growled the donkey. "I always did think the ponies in this town were crazy, but teenagers even more so."

I gritted my teeth. "Yeah, okay, fine. I'm a crazy teenager, but I really need to get going."

Halfway through my sentence, the donkey rolled his eyes upward, then frowned even more and touched a hoof to his head. "Wait a minute! Where did it go?!"

I raised an eyebrow. "Where did what go?"

The donkey narrowed his eyes at me. "So that's it, huh? Not good enough to run me down, you gotta try to embarrass me, too!"

My eyes widened, and I started to back up a step. "I have no clue what you're -- huh?"

My left fore-hoof had stepped on something. I lifted it and looked down. A clump of hair sat on the ground. I stared at it for some time, glancing at his bald head before I realized what it was. "Oh."

The donkey made a growling noise.

I levitated the toupee and tried to arrange it as neatly as I could back on his head. He slapped his hoof on it. "Stop it! I'll fix it myself!"

"Yeah, sorry," I murmured. "I'll, uh, just be on my way, okay?"

The donkey raised an eyebrow. "Wait."

Now what? "Yeah?"

"You're that pony Matilda mentioned. Candy something."

"Candy Swirl. And ... er, Matilda?" I tilted my head. "Are you Cranky Doodle?"

"No, I'm Princess Celestia in disguise," Cranky deadpanned. "Who else would I be?"

Were we talking about the same Matilda? That sweet little donkey married this walking ball-o-grump?

"Matilda's been all over town looking for Princess Twilight," said Cranky. "And she roped me into helping her. You got any idea where she's at?"

"She's in Canterlot," I said. "She's helping the other princesses set up for the, uh, what did she call it, the Grand Equestrian Pony Summit."

"Figures," Cranky muttered. "All this trouble for nothing. I tried to tell her it was a darn fool idea to begin with, but when she gets something in her head--"

"Why does Matilda want to see Twilight?"

Cranky scowled. "Teenagers. Always interrupting."

I frowned. "You know what? Never mind. Next time I see Twilight after she gets back, I'll let her know Matilda wants to talk to her. See ya."

I whirled around and took off. Great, now I had zero time to stop by Bon Bon's place thanks to the most appropriately named denizen of Ponyville next to Derpy.

The incident with Cranky had left my mane in disarray, so I entered the boutique via the back entrance. I heard Mom's hoof-falls upstairs, as well as somepony wandering about the front room. I ducked into the bathroom, hastily smoothed out my mane, and headed to the front. "Welcome to the Carousel Boutique. How may I help you?"

A brown stallion turned towards me, and from the hourglass cutie mark, I recognized him immediately. He was the pony I was forced to leave high and dry the day of the wedding just after Mom had closed up the shop due to the bugbear. He had the same suit with him as he had that day. "Ah, yes, my dear, just the pony I wished to see!"

"Um ... I am?"

With a flick of his head, he tossed the suit on the counter. "While I had intended to bring this in for a simple alteration -- it's a bit too tight in the shoulders -- I discovered that it apparently fought what was likely a valiant but, sadly, losing battle in the end, leaving it wounded."

I turned the suit over. "Wounded? Oh ..."

Near the bottom hem of the suit, a ragged hole had been torn in the fabric. No, scratch that, more like chewed.

"The creature responsible for this travesty unfortunately got away, the scoundrel!" said the stallion.

"A moth, you mean?"

"Yes, indeed! And it actually laughed at me as it eluded my attempts to swat it."

"Of course it did," I deadpanned.

"I was hoping I could call upon your masterful skill at patching it."

How many ponies did Lyra and Bon Bon tell about this? "Well, I'll try, anyway." I levitated a tape measure from under the counter. "But let me take your measurements for the alteration before I write up the order."

As I took the measurements, I realized I had been right. I could have likely done the alterations for him that day if I hadn't already have other plans. At least he didn't seem upset with having to wait until now. "All right, I think I got it," I said as I levitated a pad and quill before me. "Can I have your name, please?"

"Yes, of course. It's Doctor Whooves."

I paused. "Is that H-o-o-"

"Actually, it's W-h-o-o-v-e-s. Or just 'The Doctor' if you prefer."

I paused again.

He smiled. "No worries, my dear, it's a common mistake."

So he's The Doctor. And has a time-related cutie mark.

Nope, not going there.

"I'll have this ready in two days," I said.

"Smashing!" said Doctor Whooves. "I'll be off, then."

As he left the boutique, I levitated the suit and trotted towards the work room in the back, tilting my head up as I passed the stairs. "Hey, Mom, where are you?"

"Candy! Get up here!" came her sudden cry.

I flinched, one hoof poised in mid-step, my ears flattening. Now what? "Er, be right there," I said as I rushed into the work room to place the suit upon a ponyquin and pin the order to it.

I bolted up the stairs. At the top, I found the door to my room open and heard movement within. I face-hoofed; I had "forgotten" to clean my room again. I sighed and trotted forward. "Mom, I can explain. I've been very busy lately, and I only just started using my horn again in--"

I stopped as I stepped into my room. My closet was open, and Mom had my dress in her magic. She turned to me, eyes wide. "How did you do it?! How did you do it?!"

I lifted a fore-hoof as if to take a step back. "How did I do what?"

"This dress!" Mom cried, holding it before me. "It's perfect! Did I only imagine seeing it torn??"

I frowned. "Well, no, of course not." I grabbed the dress and turned it around. "See, the patch was right ... here ...?"

I stared, turning the dress around and around. It was perfect. I found no sign that I had ever patched it, or that it had ever been damaged.

Mom stepped up to me and smiled. "Either you're holding out on me, dear, and you replaced the panel completely, or something rather extraordinary happened."

"Well, your guess is as good as mine." I let her take the dress back. "When I looked at that dress before the wedding, it still looked patched. I ... wait ..."

Mom looked at me eagerly. "What is it?"

"Well, maybe it's nothing, I haven't had a chance to look at it myself, but Lyra told me over lunch that Bon Bon's dress looked perfect, too, like they couldn't tell it was patched."

Mom gasped. "Oh, my stars, perhaps you've discovered your special talent!"

I raised an eyebrow. "What, patching dresses perfectly? Isn't that a little silly?"

"Not at all. No talent is silly."

I craned my neck and glanced at my still blank flank. "Then why don't I have a cutie mark for it?"

Mom's smile faded. "Hmm, yes."

I jabbed a hoof towards the dress. "Mom, that dress was still very obviously patched before the wedding, and so was Bon Bon's when you gave it back to her. Why only now are they like this?"

She looked thoughtful. "There were those two odd magic discharges from your horn."

"Yeah, but I wasn't even thinking about the dresses. They were the furthest thing from my mind."

"Then I would suggest you continue your patch work," said Mom as she levitated the dress carefully back into my closet. "And see where it goes from there."

"That's easy enough," I said. "I had somepony request a patch job just now."

She closed my closet door and turned to face me. "And I'm sure I can get more for you to work on."

"And here I thought you didn't like to do patch work."

Mom smiled. "Well, you see, if ponies can keep their ensembles a little longer -- at least as long as fashion trends will allow -- it will free up more of my time to pursue opening that additional boutique in Canterlot."

I smirked. "Oh, I see. I'm just part of your business model."

Mom blushed. I loved it when I could get her to do that. "That's not quite what I meant."

I giggled. "I'm teasing you. Yeah, okay, I'll just keep at it, and we'll see what happens."

"Perhaps I can hold a trade-in sale," said Mom. "That's sure to bring in enough practice dresses for you to work on. And bring in lots of business!"

I grinned. "Yep, I'm just a cog in your business machine."

She rolled her eyes. "Oh, hush."

My efforts to look at Bon Bon's dress were again thwarted when I got too wrapped up in my work to notice time passing. Not until the sun had dipped low enough to shine in my eyes in my work room did I realize how late it was getting.

"Dear, if you want to leave now to head over to Bon Bon's place, feel free to do so," said Mom when I expressed my woes to her.

"Yeah, but I promised Cherry I'd visit her today," I protested. "And I want to get over there before the sun sets. Watching the sun set was something we used to love to do together."

"In that case, you go on over to see Cherry. I need to pop out briefly to the marketplace anyway, so I'll see if I can stop by Bon Bon's place along the way."

I smiled. "Thanks, Mom, you're the best."

I left the boutique and galloped over to Sweet Apple Acres. By the time I stepped up to the entrance, I was panting a bit from the exertion.

Applejack trotted up to me as I stepped onto the farm. "Heh, ya gotta get inta better shape than that, sugarcube."

I grinned faintly as I turned towards her. Sweat glistened on her coat, and mud clung to her hooves. She had likely labored the entire day and still looked like she could out-pace me. "Yeah, I'll remember that when I decide to take up farming."

Applejack chuckled. "Ya here to see Cherry?"

I squinted at the sun. It hung just above the horizon, glowing in gold pre-sunset splendor. "Yeah. Where can I find her?"

Applejack pointed with a hoof. "Jus' a little while ago, she headed fer the tall hill back behind that there orchard. Straight ahead, can't miss it."

"Thanks."

I cantered off towards the trees and found a worn path. It opened up into a large clearing, the land rising in the center, covered in grasses and flowers. At the top was a single tree, and I smiled at the familiar peach-furred form who sat beneath it, her gaze cast towards the horizon. The sun had started to descend, now blazing a gorgeous orange. It made her red mane look as if it were glowing.

I trotted up the side of the hill. Cherry turned her head at my approach and smiled. "Candy! It is good to see you."

I shared a warm hug with her. "Hey, your speech has improved already."

Cherry smiled as I sat down next to her. "Thank you. It helps that the Apple family likes to talk to me to help pass the day when I am not at Twilight's castle."

I could tell that it still took some effort on her part. Her sentences were slow and meticulous, and she had yet to master contractions. "So Twilight's been picking the changeling half of your brain?"

Cherry looked off towards the sun. "Indeed. It has been an interesting experience for both of us."

"I have to admit, I'm not sure how that even works."

Cherry hesitated as her gaze tracked a few lone clouds glowing deep gold that drifted just above the sun. Her smile faded slightly. "It is ... a bit strange for me. I can clearly remember my life back on our world, but, somehow, I remember being a drone in Chrysalis' hive."

I shivered and hoped Cherry didn't see that. I had only a glimpse of that place when Discord had "gifted" Chrysalis with the defunct artifact, but it was enough to know that was someplace I never wanted to live.

In the uneasy silence that settled over us, I gazed at the sun. The lower limb had touched the horizon, and I could see it slowly sinking as it deepened to orange-red. A few more clouds had appeared, and as I squinted, I saw pegasi pushing them, purposely setting up a beautiful sunset scene.

Cherry's smile returned fully. "Isn't this world as amazing as it is strange?"

I grinned. "Yeah, I'd say that was true."

She turned to me. "I have a full name now."

"Come again? Full name?"

Cherry giggled softly. "Little Apple Bloom was insistent that 'Cherry' was too short, so she helped me fill it out a bit."

I rolled my eyes. "You're lucky, then. Pinkie Pie named me."

"And I still think Candy Swirl is a lovely name."

I blushed. "So what did you two come up with?"

"We kept it simple. My full name now is Cherry Blossom."

I smiled. "That sounds really cute. I think it suits you."

Cherry's smile widened. Perhaps it was just the deepening sunset light reflecting from them, but her eyes looked subdued. I honestly had not come to deal with any more problems. I especially didn't want to talk about changelings anymore. From the way she had shifted the topic, maybe she had realized that.

"So how's life been with the Apple family?" I asked.

Cherry giggled. "I had said I had wanted to feel grounded again. You canst not ... er, cannot get any more grounded than them."

I chuckled. "So I've noticed."

"They even put me to work on the farm when I am not at the castle," said Cherry as she turned her gaze towards the sunset. "Applejack claims it is so I can 'stretch my new pony muscles.'" She blushed. "I quickly learned I am a horrible apple-bucker."

I laughed. "Oh, wow, they had you try that?"

"At Apple Bloom's insistence. Upon seeing my terrible performance, she muttered 'well, cross that one off the list.'"

I laughed harder, and Cherry joined me. God, this felt good. After the death of my birth mother, so much of our time together had been filled with my tears. It had been so long since we had laughed together. Maybe that was why I really didn't want to hear about the changeling bits of her mind. I feared it would somehow tarnish my image of her, make her less like the friend I knew.

I looked towards the sun. Half of it had sunk below the horizon, and it blazed a deepening red. The clouds glowed in purple, placed perfectly to frame the setting sun. Sometimes my mind still could not wrap itself around the concept that a living being at that moment was lowering the sun. Did that task ever become a chore, just a necessity for giving light and warmth to the world? Or did Princess Celestia take joy in every sunrise and sunset just for their inherent beauty? Was it a job or a calling? I supposed I needed only to remember her cutie mark to answer that.

I still had trouble with the notion that my own special talent could be patching clothing. It sounded more like a skill or a job, sort of like the alterations I did at the boutique. I mean, I liked what I did, but it was still a job and not a calling.

"Are you okay, Candy?" Cherry prompted.

"Huh? Oh, sorry," I said sheepishly. "I guess I was woolgathering a bit."

"Is something the matter?"

I rubbed a hoof through my mane. "Not really. Just still thinking about what I'll eventually do with my life here."

Cherry nodded once and turned her eyes to the sunset again. Not that there was a whole lot more to see. Only a sliver of the sun was still visible, and as I waited for her to speak, it vanished from sight. The sky sat in calm velvet twilight, clouds still faintly glowing a deep purple.

"That hath ... er, has crossed my mind as well," said Cherry.

"Maybe you can get yourself fostered, too?" I said.

"I am eighteen, Candy. That appears to be legal adult age here as well."

"Well, yeah, but you hardly know your way around. I mean, you have to have someplace to stay and all that, right?"

Cherry smiled. "I have no fears over that. There are enough kind ponies who would take me in even if I didn't stay at the farm. But I truly feel I owe this world something. It gave me life again. I want to do something to repay that debt."

So I wound up forced to bring up the subject again myself. "Well, you've got all that information about changelings in your head. Maybe you can do something with that."

Cherry nodded slowly, but her voice became as subdued as her eyes when she spoke again. "It will indeed take me a while to satisfy all of Twilight's curiosity."

"Well, there you go. And with her being the Princess of Friendship and all that, I'll bet she can find something in there to help deal with changelings better."

Cherry said nothing to this, and instead looked back at the horizon. The last of the glow of the clouds had begun to fade.

I sighed. "Cherry, what's wrong?"

She lowered her gaze, a lock of hair falling over one eye. "You do not wish to hear it."

"Yeah, I do. Look, you said our relationship had to change, right? So why can't I be the one to help you?"

Cherry shook her head. She brushed her hair from her eye with a hoof. "It's not something you can help with. It is just ... some of what I recount to Twilight makes me sad."

"Yeah, I can sorta see that. Wuntusix didn't exactly have a good time of it, did she?"

"It is more than that," said Cherry. "Life in the hive is not very good."

I snorted. "Well, yeah, with that bitch Chrysalis in charge, no wonder."

Cherry looked as if she wanted to say something else, but hoof-falls sounded behind us. "Cherry, Applejack sent me ta fetch ya," said Apple Bloom. "Dinner's about ready."

Cherry smiled faintly and stood. "Thank you."

Apple Bloom turned to me. "Hey, Candy, yer welcome ta stay fer dinner, too."

I rose to my hooves. "Thanks, but I better get home."

"Ya sure? Seems like ages since I've seen ya. Thought mebbe we could catch up."

"I'll make some time this weekend, I promise." I turned to Cherry and pulled her into a hug. "I'm really glad to see you're doing well, Cherry." I drew back and looked into her eyes. "Sometimes I worry you might, I don't know, have second thoughts about becoming a little peach pony."

Cherry giggled and lay a hoof beside my cheek. "Please, don't ever worry about that. I am as content as I can be. I will see you again soon."

I gave her one more hug before turning away.

"Seeya, Candy!" Apple Bloom called out.

I waved back before trotting down the side of the hill. As I passed through the entrance of the farm, the sky deepened to almost full night, and the moon was raised, stars sweeping into the heavens in twinkling display. That same strange sense of utter calm settled over everything, as if the glow of the moon was somehow an instinctive sign to everypony and everything to start shutting down for the night. I wondered if this were the same everywhere in Equestria or just in sleepy little towns like Ponyville.

I glanced at my flank. Was it just a simple matter of gaining my cutie mark in order to find my purpose in this world? Would it be the same for Cherry as well? I at least had a path to follow, but Cherry didn't even have that. Had I cast her adrift without so much as a compass?

Instead of letting go, as Cherry had wanted, I had instead tried to reverse our roles, and I didn't think that's what she wanted. This was going to be harder than I had realized.

Jump to top

Chapter 47 - Don't Talk Back

After giving the dress to the customer and accepting her bits in return, I showed her to the door and stood there as she headed away. My gaze darted about, lingering on any area that could be used to hide a little pony, narrowing my eyes whenever I believed I saw movement where there should be none. Satisfied that this round turned up empty, I withdrew into the boutique, only to see Mom standing in front of the counter, one eyebrow raised.

I turned away from the door. "What?"

"That's the third time you've done that this morning," Mom said.

I trotted back to the counter. "So I'm not allowed to apply a little personal touch?"

"That's not what I mean, and you know it."

I rolled my eyes. "How about you try being followed around by somepony for several days and see how paranoid it makes you."

Mom sighed. "And why are you so sure you're being followed?"

"Because I have sort of an instinct for it. Remember what my situation was like back on my world. If I didn't have that, I would've been dead long before I wound up in that alley."

Mom's expression softened. "I suppose I see your point, but I do hope you're not worried about somepony trying to hurt you."

"I'm more worried about Cherry."

Mom gave me a nonplussed look. "Cherry? Why?"

"Because I know her! She won't leave well enough alone. She's going to get herself mixed up in this whole thing with Spoiled Rich. I wouldn't be surprised if Diamond Tiara was the one following me."

Mom frowned. "Likely not, given how much her family likes to delegate tasks to others, especially if it involves getting their hooves dirty. Regardless, perhaps you're a little more worried than you ought to be. Twilight has pledged to keep Cherry's origins a secret for the time being. Even Applejack was willing to go along with that."

If that wasn't a tell-tale sign of how much Spoiled Rich had irritated other ponies outside her own little circle -- that the bearer of the Element of Honesty agreed to keep something secret from her -- I didn't know what was. "I really wish Matilda hadn't started all this."

"I would say, then, that this is her fight, not yours."

I wasn't fighting for any side. I had my own lingering resentments towards changelings; whether or not they were rational was beside the point. I didn't like the idea of a changeling taking up residence in Ponyville, but I didn't have an axe to grind about it. But other residents might, since Spoiled Rich had made sure everypony who would listen knew what was going on. Even if the decision ultimately rested with Mayor Mare or the Town Council, public sentiment could likely sway their decision.

I just didn't want to see that sentiment also sway against Cherry.

Mom turned towards a corner of the room where a vase of flowers sat upon a pedestal. "At the risk of subjecting you to being followed again, I do need you to head to the marketplace."

"No, that's fine," I said. "What do you need?"

Mom levitated the vase. "I need you to get me new flower arrangements for the boutique."

I eyed the bright yellow and white flowers in the vase as she brought it over. "They look okay to me."

"Yes, for summer. Fall is rapidly approaching, and these will look completely out of place against my fall fashions. And don't look at me like that."

I grinned. "I'm not," I said, even though I was.

"Bring me an arrangement of deep reds with some muted gold, but not so muted that they don't stand out. Unless you're forced to go with a paler red, then instead of the gold, you should opt for--"

I sighed as I snatched paper and quill from under the counter and levitated them before me. "I better write this down ..."

With saddlebags in tow and Mom's list of flower requirements in my magical grip, the lower edge of which trailed on the ground, I cast a wary gaze about me as I entered the marketplace. I really hoped I could just hand the list to the flower ponies and have them do the rest.

I found two of the three -- Lily and Daisy -- tending to the plants they had out on display. Before I could trot over and take advantage of the lack of any line, I spotted Fluttershy standing before the announcement board, her face a mask of worry. I trotted over to her. "Hey, Fluttershy."

She turned her head and smiled. "Hello, Candy, how are you?"

"I've been doing pretty good. Um, sorry I haven't been by much lately, it's just--"

She held up a hoof. "No need to apologize. I understand. Are you looking forward to starting high school?"

"Eh, yes and no."

Fluttershy chuckled. My teenage propensities never seemed to bother her. "I'm sure you'll do fine."

I glanced at the board. "So, something up?"

Fluttershy's smile faded slightly as she turned towards the board. Usually, all I saw there was the weather schedule, lost and found notifications, and announcements of upcoming festivals. This time, what drew my eye was a rather large poster with the words "TOWN HALL MEETING" in tall, bold letters.

"I don't like attending those," Fluttershy said. "Too many ponies shouting, and nopony ever hears what I have to say. I usually stay home, but ... um, well ..."

She gestured at it with a wing, but I was already reading it: Citizens of Ponyville! Make your voice heard! Tell the Council how you will NOT stand for dangerous creatures living in our midst! Remind them that the changelings are the ENEMY! Come and show your support for Concerned Citizen's Petition #2731 (On the opposition to a changeling moving into Ponyville)

I frowned. "Is this Spoiled Rich's doing?"

Fluttershy sighed. "Yes. I really wish she wouldn't act so unkind. I mean, I'm nervous about Kevin moving here, too, but, well, I'm willing to give it a try."

"Does Twilight know about this?"

"Yes, but she's had so many events and crises to deal with recently that she needs a break," said Fluttershy. "And, well, there's already some friction between her and Mayor Mare."

"Friction? What kind of friction?"

"It started back at the summit with Chrysalis," said Fluttershy. "Mayor Mare felt she wasn't consulted enough when the location switched to Ponyville. And, well, the bit with the yaks didn't help. So Twilight doesn't want to be seen as using her influence too much."

I sighed and ran a hoof through my mane.

"Candy, what do you think about this?"

I wished she hadn't asked me that. The memory of the emotional pain inflicted upon me by Sevfivtoo tried to push me into the opinion that I'd rather see him go elsewhere. Yet I could no more forget that Cherry was alive because of a changeling's selfless sacrifice than I could forget my own name, old or new.

Fluttershy looked away. "Maybe I shouldn't have asked that."

"No, it's fine," I said. "I ... I don't know. I kinda want to just take a step back and let others decide, you know? I'm underage, anyway, so I doubt I'd have much influence."

"Cherry is considered an adult, though," said Fluttershy.

"Yeah, don't remind me." I glanced at the meeting notice. "Well, I have to get flowers for Mom, I'll see you later."

Fluttershy smiled. "See you, Candy."

I cantered back to the flower shop, only to skid to a halt when I found that they already had a customer. I trotted over to stand in line. I slowed my approach as I noticed the hourglass cutie mark of the brown stallion who stood in front of me.

"Um, can you be a little more specific about what you want, Doctor?" Lily said.

Doctor Whooves' eyes darted towards the shop as if looking for something. "I'm not sure I can, my dear. I'm afraid I'm not very good at this."

"Picking out flower arrangements?" said Daisy.

"Yes. No! That is ... er ... it's a bit complicated, you see."

Lily smiled. "Perhaps if you tell us what occasion this is for?"

Doctor Whooves swallowed. "Ah, well ... not so much for an occasion as for a pony."

"Oo, this is for your marefriend?" Daisy cooed.

"No!" the Doctor cried. "I mean, I don't ... she's a friend, and, well, she's a mare, so, ah, I suppose she technically qualifies under the very broad definition of the word. Assuming a strict literal translation of the root word components, that is."

Lily and Daisy exchanged a confused look.

Doctor Whooves sighed. "I'm not making much sense, am I?"

"I have an idea," said Daisy. "Let me go fetch Roseluck."

The Doctor's pupils shrank. "Er ... well .... I-I don't want to bother the young lady, you see."

Daisy smiled. "Oh, it's no bother, she's just in the back taking inventory."

Lily nodded. "Yes, she's the best with arrangements for friends and romantic partners."

Doctor Whooves blushed. "Oh, but she's not--! I mean, this marefr ... friend who by pure circumstance happens to be a mare is not--!"

"Now, no worries, Doctor, we'll get this sorted out," said Daisy. "Lily, can you wait on Miss Swirl? Looks like she's got Rarity's seasonal arrangement rule list with her."

I breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank you," I said as I levitated the list over to Lily.

Lily smiled as she took the list in hoof. "No worries at all. I'll be back soon."

Both ponies left. Doctor Hooves turned to me with a nervous smile. "So, ah, Miss Swirl, we meet again."

"Um, yeah, we do," I said in a hesitant voice.

"Nice weather we're having, isn't it?"

"Yeah, I guess."

The Doctor glanced back towards the shop. "What a stroke of odd luck that it would be Roseluck who's the best at this sort of thing." He suddenly laughed. "Ah! Luck! Roseluck! A little unintentional pun, it would seem. Jolly good!"

I just nodded and stared.

I heard a clop of hooves in the distance as Roseluck came around the back of the shop alongside Daisy. Doctor Hooves suddenly looked like a deer caught in the headlights and yanked out a pocket-watch. "Great whickering stallions, look at the time! I'm late!"

I tilted my head. "For what?"

"For everything, Miss Swirl! All time is relative, remember that. Anyway, I'm off!"

Yeah, in more ways than one. I watched as he galloped away.

Daisy spoke in a low voice as she and Roseluck approached. "So I'm thinking maybe you can find out from him who the lucky ... um ..." Both ponies looked around. "Where did the Doctor go?"

"He, uh, had to leave suddenly," I said.

"Well, that's too bad," said Roseluck. "I was looking forward to seeing him again. He seemed nice enough when I met him at the wedding. Oh, well."

I glanced at the announcement board. "Hey, uh, did you happen to see my friend Cherry at all today?"

"Oh, yes, actually," said Roseluck with a smile.

"She stopped and talked to us for a bit," said Daisy.

"Did you see where she went?" I asked.

"Just the general direction," said Roseluck, lifting a hoof.

I frowned. Town Hall was that way.

"Something the matter?" asked Daisy.

Other than my friend trying to get in over her head? "No, nothing," I said with a sigh.

With my saddlebags stuffed with flowers, I should have headed straight back to the boutique, but I had to satisfy my curiosity. Unfortunately, that creepy sensation of being watched accompanied me as well. I soon spotted Cherry up ahead, trotting in my direction. She smiled and quickened her pace when she saw me. "Hello, Candy. Those flowers look nice. What's the occasion?"

I glanced past her. "Cherry, were you in Town Hall just now?"

Cherry hesitated. "What difference does that make?"

"It makes all the difference in the world!"

Cherry sighed. "You do not need to know everything I do every moment of the day."

"Look, you've been a pony for--" I caught myself and looked around. Too many opportunities presented themselves for a little pony kid to hide. I lowered my voice and leaned close to her. "You've been a pony for all of a few weeks, and you're trying to stir up the pot!"

"Why are you whispering?" Cherry said in a normal voice.

I rolled my eyes. "Please, just don't talk openly about yourself right now, okay?"

"Eventually, I want to stop hiding who I am," said Cherry. "Or what I am, or how I got here. Everypony in Ponyville knows your story."

"Yes, but mine didn't involve changelings!" I hissed through clenched teeth. I face-hoofed. "Let me rephrase that."

Cherry lay a hoof on my shoulder. "No, I get it. I'm not going to do anything foolish, you know that."

"Right, you've never done anything foolish before, like when you wanted to help the druggies in the worst neighborhood ever," I deadpanned.

Cherry dropped her hoof and frowned. "Don't go there, please."

"Then why are you going there?!"

"Do you even have any idea what I did just now at Town Hall?"

I jabbed a hoof at her. "Ha! I knew I was right! You did go there."

"For all of your gained maturity, Candy, you sometimes still act like a child."

I drew back a step. "That wasn't fair."

"Neither is your treatment of me," Cherry declared. "The reason I went to Town Hall is to formally register myself as a resident of Ponyville. You know, because of the little fact that I'm eighteen, so that makes me an adult in their eyes, and they like to know who the town's citizens are for legal reasons."

"Oh," I said in a small voice.

Cherry gave me a tiny smile. "Candy, I appreciate how much you care for me, but you cannot feel like you have to protect me."

I narrowed my eyes. "You know about the Town Hall Meeting, right?"

"Yes, I found out about it in the marketplace earlier today. I was there when the notice was put up." Cherry paused. "I know what you're thinking. I had every intention of coming to Town Hall to do exactly what I said."

"And, conveniently, registered citizens can attend Town Hall meetings."

Cherry said nothing and lowered her head slightly.

"You're going to that meeting, aren't you?" I demanded.

"Yes."

I sighed. "And you're going to speak against the petition."

"Of course I am," said Cherry. "Why wouldn't I?"

I shook my head. "Cherry, please ..."

"Kevin does not deserve to be treated this way," Cherry declared. "He had been nothing but helpful through the whole crisis. He warned Twilight of the real danger of Sevfivtoo. He doesn't even consider himself a follower of Chrysalis anymore. He hasn't harmed a single pony."

"Look, you're preaching to the choir here, okay?" I cried. "Honestly, at this point, he can be put up in a luxury suite in the Castle of Friendship for all I care. What I care about is you being caught in the fallout."

"I've already said, I'm not going to reveal about how I--"

I waved a hoof frantically. "Shhh!!"

"Candy, stop it," Cherry snapped. "Who is going to hear us? There's nopony around."

I heard a faint rattle, and my head jerked towards it. My gaze fell on a waste-bin. Faint hoof-beats faded into the distance behind it.

"Nopony around, huh?" I said as I levitated the saddlebags off my barrel and placed them carefully on the ground before breaking into a full gallop.

I had not seen where that little spy had gone, but straight ahead was the entrance to an alleyway. As I approached, I heard hoof-falls echoing from it. I turned the corner as tight as I could without falling off my hooves, but all I saw was a brief flicker of tail at the other end of the alleyway.

A two-toned silvery-gray tail. Delegation, indeed.

I cantered back to Cherry, who gave me a confused look. "What was that all about?"

I raised an eyebrow. "You're joking, right? Somepony was just listening in on us!"

"But they couldn't have been any older than a child."

I frowned. "Yeah, and I think I know which child it was. Question is, how to catch her?"

Cherry sighed. "You're making this into a bigger deal than I think you need to."

I levitated the saddlebag over my barrel. If I hadn't had to deal with these flowers, I would have caught her. "You know something? I hope you're right. But in case you're not, I want them to know for sure that I caught them at their game. But I'm going to need Twilight's help for that."

"Honestly, I think you should listen to your friend," said Mom as she plucked flowers from where my saddlebags sat on the floor of the boutique. "You're getting yourself worked up for no good reason."

Sweetie Belle stepped up to the flowers and gave them a sniff. "I don't know, Rarity. Spoiled Rich can make a lot of trouble for ponies when she wants to. You even told me that."

"Yes, but it's one thing to be the center of trouble and another to seek it out," said Mom.

"I'm not trying to seek it out!" I cried. "If anypony is, it would be Cherry. Look, if it were just that she's an alien-turned-pony like me, I wouldn't be worried. Nopony bats an eye at my origins anymore. It's the you-know-what part I'm worried will come out."

Sweetie Belle frowned. "I wish Spoiled Rich would stop being so mean."

Mom placed the flowers she was holding in the vase and tilted her head as she regarded them. "While I don't agree with Spoiled Rich's tactics by any means, I can see her point. I also can see Cherry's point."

"It's not about that," I declared. "I couldn't care less about how it turns out."

Mom turned to me. "Yes, I know, you're worried for your friend, but I believe she can take care of herself. She also has Applejack guiding her."

"All right, fine, but will you concede that I've proven somepony was following me and is trying to get information on Cherry?"

Mom paused as she levitated another batch of flowers. "Yes, you were being followed, though there's no way to tell what--"

"So I think I have a right to do something about it," I said. "And I can, if you let me talk to Twilight."

"Who do you think it was?" Sweetie Belle asked.

"Diamond's yes-pony, Silver Spoon."

Mom clicked her tongue. "I get along reasonably well with her parents if I take them in small doses. It's too bad they let her daughter attach herself to bad role models."

"Maybe tell her parents?" Sweetie suggested.

"Yeah, maybe they can rein her in," I said.

"But how if you have no proof of what she's done?" Mom asked.

"Thank you for agreeing with my original point," I said with a grin.

Mom raised an eyebrow. "You mean I was maneuvered into it by two fillies who are sometimes too smart for their own good."

When she turned towards the vase, Sweetie Belle and I looked at each other, grinned, and exchanged a high-hoof.

"All right," said Mom. "Go to Twilight's castle and see if she'll help, but don't pester her if she tells you 'no'."

I smiled and gave her a hug. "Thanks, Mom!"

"And try not to take too long. I have something important I need to discuss with you."

"Um, sure." I started to turn away. "Can you give me a clue as to what it is?"

Her eyes shifted to Sweetie Belle. "This is rather ... sensitive, and not for everypony's ears."

"Huh?" Sweetie Belle said. "Why can't I know what it's about?"

"Never mind, Sweetie. Now, help me with the other vase while Candy is gone."

As I approached the castle that early afternoon, I caught movement on one of the balconies. Twilight stood upon it, a saddlebag over her barrel and Spike on her back. I stopped dead as I watched her extend her wings. "Oh, come on! She's leaving town again?!"

Twilight flapped her wings and rose into the air.

"Twilight!" I yelled. I dropped to my haunches and placed my fore-hooves on either side of my muzzle. "Twilight, wait!!"

Twilight hovered and turned. After a brief pause, she flew to the ground before me. "What is it, Candy? Is something wrong?"

"I need your help," I said. "Magical help."

"Um, can this wait a few days?"

I stared. "A few days??"

Twilight smiled. "I'm headed to Canterlot to try to reconnect with some old friends I left behind when I first came to Ponyville."

I rubbed a hoof through my mane. "I'm not sure it can. Please, let me explain ..."

I tried to convey as succintly as possible about being followed and my worries over what was overheard concerning Cherry that might get back to Spoiled Rich. "And please don't tell me not to worry about it! I just want to put a stop to this spying. For all I know, she's spying on Cherry, too, and who knows what she might hear."

Twilight glanced at Spike. Spike spread his claws. "I dunno, Twilight, it's your call," he said. "You were the one who was worried about what ponies would think of Cherry's origins until you had a chance to break it to them gently."

"Yes, and leave it to Spoiled Rich to use a sledgehammer when a light touch is needed," Twilight said sourly. "Candy, I have a spell in mind, but it's a bit advanced for a unicorn your age. There's a chance you might not master it in the brief time we have. I want to get to Canterlot by nightfall at the latest."

"I promise, Twilight, if it doesn't work, I won't raise a fuss," I said.

"All right, then, come inside with me," said Twilight.

I opened the door with a careful, slow push of magic and stepped into the wide hall, my hooves echoing into the silence. My eyes darted left and right, my ears swiveling as I sought to detect a clue as to where my quarry lay. Hiding spaces abounded for somepony not much bigger than a child in the thick pedestals that flanked either side of the hall.

I had only one more shot at this.

I heard a faint noise, and I came to a dead stop. I went over the runes in my head one more time before acting on them, and my horn glowed as the first half of the spell activated. Suddenly, I could hear the faint whistle of wind through the crystal spires above me, and the distant hum of appliances in the kitchen. I also heard ...

... a scrape of claw.

I spun around to my left and let loose the second half of the spell. A faint, semi-circular wall of energy tinted the same color as my coat spread out before me. When it contacted the third pillar on the left, a form sparkled behind it. In that instant, I could sense that object as if it were in full view. As unskilled as I still was at advanced magic, the effect would last only a second, but it was enough. I caught it in my levitation magic and yanked upward.

"Gahh!" Spike cried, his limbs flailing as he floated above the floor in my magic. "Okay! Okay! You did it! Now, put me down!"

I let out a long sigh of relief as I set him down gently on the floor.

Hoof-falls sounded behind me as Twilight stepped inside. "Very good, Candy! I think you finally got it."

I turned to her. "It's a little more taxing than I had expected," I said in a slightly breathy voice. "Glad I got it on that attempt. I don't think I could've done another."

"I got a good look at the flow of your magic while you practiced," Twilight said as Spike stepped over to us. "You seem to have a leftover effect from channeling the magic from Starswirl's avatar. It augmented your horn's maximum flow a bit, but your internal energy capacity needs to catch up. So you can use more powerful magic, but only in short bursts."

I smiled. "I really appreciate you doing this for me, Twilight, thank you."

"Just be careful," said Twilight. "If you do catch the little pony who's been following you, just give her a talking to. Let her parents handle discipline."

"I just want to get her to stop, that's all. I dont want to hurt her."

"We better get going, Twilight," said Spike. "The sun's going down."

My head whipped towards a window. "Oh, ponyfeathers, it's that late?! I better get home."

"Candy, just one more thing before you go," said Twilight. "I'll be back in time to attend the Town Hall meeting, but I can't use my influence any further in this matter. We just have to hope that cooler heads will prevail like they did with you."

I nodded. "Fluttershy explained it to me. Can I take that to mean you approve of Kevin staying in Ponyville?"

"Of course. What better way to show we want peace and friendship with the changelings?" Twilight turned to Spike. "Come on, let's get going."

"Good luck with your friends, Twilight," I said.

Twilight smiled. "Thanks." Her smile faded slightly. "Um, Spike? You made that checklist of their names, right?"

"Yep, already done," said Spike.

"Oh, good!" Twilight gushed. "Let's go."

Because I returned to the boutique so late, Mom had to delay her talk with me until after dinner. In the interim, I discovered that she had taken the liberty of buying me both a desk for my room, and school supplies like notebooks and quills.

"Thank you, Mom," I said as we trotted into my room. "I didn't even think about having to get all this stuff."

She gave me a wry grin. "That's why I did it, dear, because I knew you'd likely forget."

I smirked as I hopped on the bed. "You know me too well," I said as I turned around to face her and stretched out.

Mom nodded solemnly and nudged the door closed with her magic.

I swished my tail. "Um ... o-kay, what did I do wrong?"

Mom chuckled nervously. "Nothing at all, dear."

"Then what's with all this cloak-and-dagger secrecy? You wouldn't even let Sweetie Belle hear what this was all about."

Mom drew up a chair and sat in it. "Because of the, um, sensitive matter of this discussion."

I raised an eyebrow. "Uh, okay. Does this have to do with me starting school?"

"Something of that, yes," said Mom. "More like the catalyst."

"Because if you're worried about me keeping up with the course work after what I told you of my past, realize what I was going through at the time."

Mom shook her head. "I have no worries there. This is about an, um, entirely different matter, y-yes."

I gave her a wary look. "It is?"

"The environment you'll soon find yourself in made me realize I needed to have this talk with you."

My tail virtually froze in mid-swish. "Uh ..."

Mom took a deep breath. "You see ... you're going to be among a lot of colts your own age very soon."

My eyes widened.

"And ... oh, well, fillies as well, if it turns out your affections go that way ..."

Oh, holy shit.

It wasn't a talk.

It was the talk.

"But in either case, um, ah, there are some things you ought to know ..."

I lowered my head and covered it with my fore-hooves. "Gaaah! Nonono! Not this!"

Mom sighed. "Please, I've never done this before, it's difficult for me as well."

"I don't mean that!" I wailed. "I'm sixteen! I know all about stuff like this!"

"But not as a pony, Candy."

I face-hoofed. "Uh, Mom? Maybe you haven't noticed that we all go around naked most of the time. I kinda know what those bits look like on ponies already, and I'm pretty sure I know how they work. I doubt very much that the function is much different from my original form."

Mom was trying her best not to become exasperated, and I knew I wasn't making it any easier, but this was the last thing I wanted to think about. Maybe that was only because I hadn't spent any time around ponies my own age, but still, couldn't this have waited?

"But what may be different from what you're used to are customs, norms, and protocol," Mom said firmly. "And I know Spring is two seasons away, but the sooner you know how to deal with that time--"

My heart sank into my hooves. "Oh, dear Celestia, please don't tell me Equestrian ponies go into heat!"

Mom blushed. "W-well ... not as such. Er ... not strictly as such. Um, what was the term Twilight used once? Vestigial estrus cycle, I believe. The point is, mares are somewhat more ... (ahem) ... receptive in the Spring, and for younger fillies your age without much experience in dealing with it, it can be ... er ... uh ... rather trying."

I planted my face in the bedspread and groaned. "How bad?"

Mom waved a hoof in the air. "Ah, well, while I trust you to exercise, ah, a certain degree of self-restraint ... um ... let's just say there's a spell I want to teach you for your own protection against, ah, certain consequences. Just in case, mind you."

I yanked a pillow in my magic and covered my head with it. "Just kill me now."

Mom sighed. "This is going to be long night."

And it was.

And every moment was twice as awkward as the last.

Well, okay, maybe it wasn't that bad, and in a way, it was another sort of bonding. To my embarrassment, she did tell me things I had no idea about. In retrospect, seeing Mom try to break out of her prim and proper persona to talk about something like this was amusing. We wound up laughing at our mutual nervousness in the end.

More importantly, it helped remind me how much I loved her and how happy I was to have her.

Author's Note

Sorry to have to leave out the more juicy details of "the talk" but I do kinda want to keep this teen-rated and not have to add a "sex" tag It just made sense to me that Rarity would do this at some point, and I thought it might be amusing.

~~Maybe that could be a separate story.~~

Jump to top

Chapter 49 - Spoiled [Re-edited]

Author's Note

This is a (re)re-edit of this chapter. I had unpublished it briefly to work it over a bit. I wound up putting back the scene with Candy/Summer, but edited a bit to make it more clear what my intent had been and downplaying what had not been intended in the first place.

First time readers will have no idea what I'm talking about. Just read on and don't worry about it

Chapter 49 - Spoiled [Re-edited]

Sweetie Belle smiled at me from across the kitchen table. "So what do you and Cherry have planned for today?"

I finished the last of my eggs before I replied. "Mom got us an appointment at the spa to start things off. I've been looking for an excuse to go back there."

Sweetie rolled her eyes. "You're going to do girly stuff?"

I smirked. "Um, Sweetie? You do realize you're a girl, too, right?"

"But not a girly girl, at least not yet."

"Says the pony who once used a love potion to set up Miss Cheerilee with Big Mac."

Sweetie Belle blushed hard. "That's totally not the same thing!"

I laughed. I loved teasing her about that too much.

"Ugh, please tell me you're not going to talk about boys all the time when you start high school," Sweetie grumbled.

Now it was my turn to blush. "I think I'm going to be too busy catching up with class work to worry about boys."

Before Sweetie could respond, I heard a soft splat, a clink of a spoon, and a soft snore.

I turned my head. Mom's eyes were closed, her head lowered. A feeble glow surrounded both her horn and the spoon she had just dropped into the middle of her oatmeal.

I exchanged a concerned glance with Sweetie before gently prodding Mom's shoulder with my fore-hoof. "Hey, you okay?"

"What?!" Mom cried as she jerked back to full consciousness. Her horn flared, and the spoon jerked hard, catapulting a glob of oatmeal across the table. I barely had time to avert my eyes before it landed on my face with a cold, wet splat.

Sweetie Belle burst out giggling.

I snatched a napkin in my magic and applied it to my face. "Eww, I don't want to wear your breakfast!"

"I'm terribly sorry, Candy," said Mom. She yawned. "I just can't seem to wake up this morning."

"You okay, Rarity?" Sweetie asked.

Mom sighed. "I didn't sleep very well at all last night."

I set the soiled napkin aside. "What happened?"

Mom rubbed her eyes with the back of her fore-hooves. "I had a horrible nightmare. I can't remember all the details, just that it had something to do with a monster made of blue smoke."

"Didn't Princess Luna help you with it?" said Sweetie.

"No, and I have to admit to feeling a bit miffed about that. I trust you both slept well?"

"Yeah, just fine," I said.

"Same here," said Sweetie Belle. "You going to be okay to do the pet-grooming thing?"

Mom's hooves clopped heavily to the floor as she left her chair. "Yes, I should be fine, but I may steal some of that special coffee blend the Princess keeps sending Candy."

"Please, steal away," I said.

She smiled. "Thank you. You best be off so you don't miss your spa date." She yawned again. "I'll try not to be envious."

I grinned as I left my seat. "It's early enough, let me at least clear the table for you."

"You're a dear, Candy, thank you," Mom said as she trotted to the coffee maker.

"I'll lend you a hoof," said Sweetie. "We can head over to the farm together. Me and the other Crusaders are going to put up more banners today."

I levitated dishes to the sink. "I thought you had pretty much plastered the town with them yesterday."

Sweetie frowned. "Yeah, but some were torn down. I'm going to try to secure them better with a spell I learned during my last Twilight Time."

Cherry smiled as we departed from the other Crusaders at the edge of town. They headed off with more banners in their cart pulled by Scootaloo's scooter, and we drifted towards the spa. "I'm really looking forward to this, Candy. But I do hope I can convince them to leave me with my simple mane style."

I grinned. "Where's your sense of adventure? Or did you forget the time back in our world when you experimented with that blue streak in your hair?"

She blushed. "Trust you to remember the one and only time I was at all rebellious. I find that this simple style is easy to care for when I don't have a fancy magical horn like you do."

"Sure, just tell them what you want. This is mostly for the pampering and relaxation. I don't really care about the fashion part." I leaned closer to her. "Don't let Mom know I said that last bit."

Cherry giggled. "Depends on what it's worth to you."

I gasped dramatically. "Blackmail! This is what it comes down to! For shame!"

Cherry laughed, and I grinned like a foal on Hearthswarming Day. "Maybe after the spa, if the others are still at the boutique, I can take a peek inside," said Cherry.

"You always were a sucker for cute animals. You should hang out with Fluttershy more often. But yeah, we can do that."

Cherry smiled. "Thank you."

"That way, you can check on Mom for me and see how she's doing."

"Oh?"

"She had trouble sleeping last night," I said. "Frankly, she looked dead on her hooves."

Cherry considered. "Really? Did she say what was wrong?"

"Something about having a nightmare."

Cherry gave me a concerned look as the boutique came into view in the distance at the end of the street. "What kind of nightmare? Did she tell you?"

"Something about a blue smoke monster."

Cherry's pupils shrank slightly.

I raised an eyebrow. "What?"

"The same thing happened to Applejack!" Cherry said. "Same nightmare."

I blinked. "Um ..."

"Does that mean something?"

I shook my head. "Coincidence. Has to be."

Cherry gave me a dubious look.

I rolled my eyes. "Oh, come on, you're going to worry about that?"

"I may be new here, Candy, but I've already learned that things like that are never coincidence."

"Fine, but I'm ignoring it anyway. And so are you."

"But--!"

"No buts, Cherry, please. This--"

The unmistakable pop of teleportation magic suddenly sounded near the boutique. We turned and stared.

Cherry sighed. "Are you going to ignore that, too?"

"You mean Princess Luna teleporting right to the front door of the boutique and bursting inside?"

"Yes."

"Darn right I am." I turned to Cherry. "Look, this is our day. Okay, yeah, maybe all that meant something, but it's the same as with the yaks. It's a crisis, but not our crisis."

Cherry slowly smiled. "I guess I'm like you were with me. I just want to help."

"All six of them are in there. These are ponies who saved Equestria several times over. I think whatever it is, they can handle it without our help."

Cherry nodded. "I just know how close you and the Princess are."

I had to admit to a small twinge of guilt. Princess Luna had comforted me and helped steer me away from Chrysalis' influence, and for that I owed her a debt I could never repay. That she would never insist on such payment failed to affect my feelings. Though to be brutally honest, Cherry was far more dear to my heart, and I had to prioritize.

I smiled and steered her towards the spa. "Come on, let's get that country dust off you."

Cherry spoke in a decent, if exaggerated, rendition of Applejack. "Ah happen ta like mah country dust, thank ye kindly."

I altered my voice into a passable imitation of Mom and threw a fore-leg across my forehead. "Oh, darling, we have got to get you off that farm before they completely corrupt your fashion sense!"

We both laughed and headed inside.

Aloe and Lotus Blossom managed to convince Cherry to do something a little more interesting with her mane after all. The style she went with looked reminiscent of Silver Spoon's, with part of it done in a braid that hung over one side. When they started manipulating her hair with instruments held in little more than their bare hooves, Cherry blurted, "Please, show me how you do that!"

I laughed so hard I nearly slipped too far down in the mud bath. Cherry blushed bright red, but Aloe and Lotus Blossom smiled. "We would be most happy to show you some grooming techniques, dear," said Aloe.

"Your friend explained to us that you are still new to your body," said Lotus Blossom.

Cherry smiled. "Thank you, you're very kind. And thank you, Candy."

"Hey, what are friends for?" I said. "Anyway, I've been there. But don't the Apples teach you any of this stuff?"

"A little. They tend to keep their manes in rather simple arrangements. Applejack hardly has to do anything. It just sort of dries in that same state and she puts those bands around it anyway."

"I cannot recall ever seeing Applejack here," said Aloe.

"Miss Rarity threatens to drag her down here one day," said Lotus Blossom.

I smirked. "I'd pay bits to see that."

We lingered in the spa a little longer so Cherry could be taught how to use her hooves better to care for her hair. I let out a wistful sigh as I remembered my first time here. I would never have believed that I would eventually be calling Rarity my mother. Perhaps that's why I had opted for the same mane style that Mom had picked out for me back then.

I drifted towards the window as my memories flowed further into the past as they had that day. Unlike then, I didn't fight it. Thoughts of my birth mother did make my heart ache, but not with loss or guilt. I simply wished I could speak with her spirit somehow, if just to reassure her that things turned out okay for me.

My gaze drifted down the street, and I spotted the Crusaders chattering away to each other. Apple Bloom thrust a hoof off to the side, frowned, and stomped it back down. Scootaloo spoke, her wings buzzing in that nervous sort of way whenever she was upset. Finally, Sweetie Belle spoke and pointed a hoof towards the spa.

I sighed. Now what?

I turned as I heard hoof-falls behind me. I couldn't help but smile. Cherry sported a new saddlebag just as I had that day, and they were filled with brushes, shampoos, and other hair-care products. "Thank you so much for letting us stay a little longer, Candy."

I grinned. "Just be prepared for Applejack to shake her head at all that 'frou-frou' hair stuff."

Cherry giggled. "She did joke about not letting Rarity influence me through you. 'Fashionista by proxy' was the term she used, I believe."

I laughed. "Hey, so long as you make it clear your mane style was your idea, not mine."

Cherry smiled. "Well, I'm ready. Where are we going next?"

"You ever have a hayburger?"

"No, I haven't."

"Then you're in for a treat. Though, um ..." I glanced at the spa ponies. They were already tending to another customer. "I should've asked them if this place had a back door."

Cherry gave me a nonplussed look.

"Er, never mind. Let's go."

We stepped outside. No sooner had the door of the spa closed behind us when Apple Bloom's voice rang out: "Candy! Cherry! Somethin' terrible has happened!"

We turned around as the Crusaders ran up to us. "Girls, can this please wait until later? I really wanted this day to Cherry and myself."

"I'm sorry about this," Sweetie Belle said. "But I don't think it can wait."

"What's wrong?" Cherry asked.

Apple Bloom frowned. "Spoiled Rich, that's what!"

I frowned. "What more can she do? The Town Hall meeting is tomorrow."

"That's the problem!" Scootaloo cried. "She moved it up to today!"

"What??" Cherry cried.

"Can she do that?" I said.

"She's the one who made the petition," said Sweetie Belle. "So she can decide when the meeting is so long as the Town Council lets her."

"And ya know they never say no ta that old bat!" Apple Bloom declared.

I face-hoofed. "Great."

"Girls, when is the meeting scheduled for?" Cherry asked.

"It starts in ten minutes!" Scootaloo cried.

Cherry turned to me. "Candy, I'm really sorry, but I have to go."

"I know," I said. "Not your fault. Girls, did you tell Twilight and the others?"

"I tried ta, but most of 'em are plumb tuckered out," said Apple Bloom.

"What, all of them?"

"All six had the same nightmare," said Sweetie. "Rarity didn't explain the whole thing to me, but it has something to do with Princess Luna, and they have to help her sort it out."

"But they have ta wait til tonight since it's got somethin' ta do with the dream world," said Apple Bloom.

"Even Rainbow Dash looks kinda bad," said Scootaloo in a quavering voice.

"Dangit, Spoiled Rich changed the meetin' time on purpose!" Apple Bloom cried. "Jus' so they couldn't be there ta help our side!"

"Then why don't we go over there and help?" said Scootaloo.

"If they'll let us," Sweetie Belle grumbled.

"Scootaloo's right, we gotta try!" Apple Bloom declared. "Come on, Crusaders, let's go!"

All five of us galloped straight to the Town Hall, the earth ponies of the group nearly out-pacing the rest of us. By the time we got there with minutes to spare, Sweetie Belle and myself were gasping for breath. Scootaloo fared better, as she used her wings to give her some additional speed, but she was winded as well.

We arrived in time to see Spoiled Rich ushering in the last of the attendees. Their style of dress suggested they came from the upper crust of Ponyville society. Obviously she was packing the place with ponies sympathetic to her cause. Even the time was likely crafted to benefit her: eleven in the morning. Ponies would be anxious to get the meeting done and go to lunch.

As the last filed inside, Spoiled Rich turned at our approach and sneered. "Go home, little foals, this meeting is not for you."

"Who ya callin' a foal?!" Apple Bloom cried.

"Better to be a foal than a fool," I deadpanned.

Spoiled Rich narrowed her gaze. "This is not for under-aged ponies!"

Cherry stepped forward. "I am not underage."

"Allow me to clarify," Spoiled Rich said in an oily voice as another pony approached from inside. "Ponies who are of age and are registered citizens may attend."

"She is a citizen, Mrs. Rich," declared Mayor Mare as she emerged, carrying a long scroll. "She's in the official registry."

Spoiled Rich ground her teeth. "Very well."

Mayor Mare turned to Cherry. "You may go inside, Miss Blossom."

I stepped forward. "Wait! I want to talk to Cherry for a moment."

Spoiled Rich gave us a shark-like smile as she pulled out a pocket-watch. "You have thirty seconds until the meeting starts."

"Oh, come on!" Sweetie Belle cried.

"Yeah, that's real fair," Scootaloo muttered.

"This is my meeting, and my rules," Spoiled Rich said. "I, for one, intend to be punctual."

"Take as long as you need, Miss Swirl," said Mayor Mare.

Spoiled Rich whirled around to face the mayor. "I beg your pardon?!"

Mayor Mare frowned. "This may be your meeting, Mrs. Rich, but I am the final arbiter of interpreting protocol, and you are being unnecessarily obstinate!" She sighed. "But I concede that the sooner these proceedings start, the better. Miss Swirl, please make your consultation quick."

"Fine," I muttered as I gestured for Cherry to follow me a short distance from the Town Hall. "Cherry, you know what I'm going to ask."

"I don't know what I will tell them about me," said Cherry. "It depends on how the meeting goes."

"I kinda figured, but I had hoped you could warn me what to expect."

"I don't know myself. I wanted to discuss this with Twilight before the meeting."

I glanced back at the Town Hall. Spoiled Rich held her pocket-watch out, an impatient frown on her face. "Cherry, whatever you do, I'll support you the best I can. No matter what."

Cherry smiled and hugged me tightly. "Thank you, Candy, that means the world to me. I better get inside. I'll come find you soon as it's over."

"You won't have to, we'll be close by."

Cherry's smile widened. She turned and cantered into the Town Hall.

"About time," Spoiled Rich muttered as I stepped up to the other Crusaders. "No more delays! We start now."

"Wait!!" came a cry from above.

The other Crusaders and I turned as one and looked up. "Woo-hoo!" Apple Bloom cried, pumping her fore-hoof into the air.

Twilight landed nearby, and I remained only cautiously hopeful. She looked awful. Her mane was in disarray, and large bags were under her eyes. I almost recoiled in astonishment when Fluttershy landed heavily beside her, looking just as bedraggled.

Twilight stepped forward. "We're here for the ..." She interrupted her words with a large yawn. "... meeting."

I approached Fluttershy. "Are you okay?"

She gave me a small smile, her eyes half-lidded. "Tired, but okay."

"Are you sure you want to do this?"

"Yes, I am," said Fluttershy. "I ... I feel I have to."

It took only a moment for me to figure it out. "Because of what you felt towards Sevfivtoo."

She nodded. "I thought maybe if something good could come out of it, I--"

"You're both too late," Spoiled Rich sneered. "The meeting started a minute ago."

"But how could it start if yer still out here flappin' yer gums?!" said Apple Bloom.

"Apple Bloom, please," said Twilight. "Applejack wouldn't want you talking like that, even if you're upset." She narrowed her bleary eyes at Spoiled Rich. "And even if you're right."

"We didn't know the time had changed until the Crusaders told us," said Fluttershy.

"That is not my problem," declared Spoiled Rich in a haughty voice. "As citizens of this town, it behooves you to--"

"Princess Twilight, Miss Fluttershy," said Mayor Mare. "Please step inside."

"Now, see here, Mayor!" Spoiled Rich cried.

Mayor Mare stepped aside to allow Twilight and Fluttershy inside before turning towards Spoiled Rich. "I am not about to deny the right to attend this meeting to ponies who have done so much to protect this town and its citizens! Whatever disagreements I have had with the Princess do not change that." She stepped closer to Spoiled Rich. "And do not think for a minute that I'm blind to what you're doing. You're attempting to deny the opposition a fair hearing. If anypony else shows up late, they will be allowed inside. Do I make myself clear, Mrs. Rich?"

Spoiled Rich frowned. "As crystal, Miss Mare," she muttered before heading inside.

Mayor Mare turned to us. "I apologize I cannot allow you all to attend. I can bend the rules only so far."

"We understand," I said before the other Crusaders could protest. "Thank you."

Mayor Mare nodded once before heading inside, the doors closing behind her.

"Dangit!" Apple Bloom grumbled.

"Wait, I have an idea for getting inside!" Scootaloo said. She pointed a hoof to an open window on the top floor. "What if I go fetch my scooter and the cart--"

"No," I said.

"--and we build a biiig ramp--"

"No."

"--and we all get in the cart--

"No!"

"--and we start from the other end of the street for a good run-up and--"

"Scootaloo, no!" I snapped. "You're not doing that!"

Scootaloo frowned. "Aw, you never let us do anything!"

"You mean I don't let you do things that will land you in the hospital," I said. "I got a better idea. There's some shaded picnic tables not far from here. I can make a run to the hayburger place and get us all lunch. My treat."

Sweetie Belle turned to me. "You don't think Rarity will object?"

I smirked. "What she doesn't know won't hurt us."

She smiled. "Sounds good to me."

"Yeah, I guess I'm hungry, too," said Scootaloo. She glanced at Town Hall and muttered, "I still think it would've worked ..."

The hayburger place was nowhere near as crowded as it had been the last time. As I had eaten there more times that Mom was privy to, I recognized some of the ponies who frequented it, as well as the employees. Perhaps that meant more ponies outside of Spoiled Rich's circle were attending the meeting. Of course, that said nothing of whose side they were on.

Anyway, I was grateful for the lack of line. A familiar young pegasus stallion with a red-orange coat and dark brown mane rushed up from behind the counter at my approach. He smiled as he hovered. "What can I get for you today, Miss?"

I glanced at the menu posted above the counter. "Four ... no, make that five number three combos to go." I decided to get one for Cherry, since she was going to be hungry when she got out of the meeting.

"Big party?" he said.

"Eh, something like that," I said with a sigh. "Considering how things are going today, more like comfort food."

He tilted his head. "Sorry to hear that. Hope everything's okay."

I managed a tiny smile. "Would take too long to explain, but, yeah, thanks."

He nodded and flew off, and I nearly did a double-take as I stared at what had been hidden behind him. One of the Crusaders' banners was tacked to the wall. This one read "SHOW WHAT FRIENDSHIP MEANS! LET KEVIN STAY!"

One corner of my mouth rose.

"You noticed that, huh?" said the pegasus. He flew back into view, gesturing with a fore-hoof towards the banner.

"Yeah, I did." I looked at him. "Did you put it up?"

"Nah, the owner did." He shrugged, his ears drooping. "I mentioned that it might drive away business, but he's kinda stubborn that way. This is the only time it's been this slow, though."

"The Town Hall meeting was moved up to today. It's going on now."

His ears perked up. "Well, cool, maybe it will pick up once it's over. Thanks for the heads-up."

He had never engaged me in this much conversation before, though I supposed it was only because of a lack of line behind me. Now that I had a better look at him, he seemed a little younger than I had initially assumed. He had a cutie mark, though I couldn't quite ... no, now I could see it. Several horizontal lines with curls at one end were set against a bright sun.

I suddenly realized he had turned himself around in mid-air as he hovered. Did he do that on purpose so I could see it better?

Some of Mom's words from The Talk came back to me: While ponies certainly like to have their cutie marks admired by others, their placement is unfortunately on a part of the body that is often the first noticed when ... how do I put this delicately ...

I didn't care how delicately she had put it, I stopped that line of thinking right there and shifted my eyes to his face. My thoughts had not been going past mere curiosity, and I didn't want to give him the wrong idea.

His amber eyes turned inquisitive. "Mind if I ask you something?"

"Depends on what it is," I said in a wary voice. Had he thought I had been staring, and now he was ...

"What's your name?"

... or maybe not. "Oh, it's Candy Swirl."

"I'm Summer Wind," he said. "I don't remember seeing you around school. You new in town?"

So he was younger than I had thought, likely closer to my age. "Yeah, just starting at Ponyville High this year."

Summer smiled. "Hey, great. Maybe I'll see you around."

"Yo, Summer!" a voice from the kitchen shouted. "The filly's order is ready!"

"Got it!" Summer zipped away.

On the bright side, at least I would already know somepony when I started school. He seemed nice enough, so long as he wanted to keep it at simple friendship. Had I seriously been worried that he would ask me out on a date or something?

I was likely worrying over nothing, but I wanted to cringe at the memory of boys asking me out back on Earth when I was still stricken with grief and guilt. Not that I didn't like boys, but my head just hadn't been in that space.

I had no idea how long it would take before I would be ready for it here. My body may be pony and hard-wired to equine biology, but my emotions were still playing catch-up. Nopony could make me rush it, though now I wondered just how much peer pressure would affect me.

Summer returned and placed a box containing five bags on the counter. "Here you go."

I started to count out bits. I really needed to deflect any further conversation suggesting any sort of "interest" he may have in me, at least until I could handle it better. I looked at the sign again, and then glanced at the sparsely populated restaurant. "Okay, so now I get to ask you a question."

Summer blinked. "Uh, sure. What's up?"

I gestured towards the banner. "What do you think about all this?"

Summer's eyes darted to the banner, and he scratched his head with his fore-hoof. "I guess I haven't, not really. Kinda out of my hooves, you know?"

"Yeah, but you must have some sort of opinion on it."

Summer grinned. "Wow, you're really direct, aren't you?"

"Flattery will get you nowhere," I deadpanned. "So what about it?"

Summer shrugged. "I dunno, I mean, has this Kevin guy done anything wrong?"

I transferred the remaining bits to the counter. "Not that I know of."

Summer swept up the money with his hooves and carried it to the register. "Well, then, I guess it's no big deal. I mean, yeah, I'd probably not want to be around him much, but, hey, he's a changeling. How would I ever know, right?"

At first, his answer seemed to boil down to "don't ask, don't tell," but perhaps that was unnecessarily harsh. That it was the first thing that came to mind reflected more my own world rather than this one. He likely meant that it just wasn't on his radar. It seemed like an honest response.

I hefted the packaged meals in my magic, the aroma making my stomach rumble. "Yeah, I guess you're right. Thanks."

Summer smiled. "Hope to see you around, Candy."

Children being what they are, the Crusaders had managed to find some other topic to keep them occupied. I let them converse among themselves and quietly ate my lunch, leaving Cherry's meal off to the side. My silent contemplation was interrupted when Rainbow Dash flew up to us. "Hey, girls, what's shaking?"

Scootaloo perked up at once and smiled. "You're looking better than when I saw you earlier."

Rainbow smiled and zipped over to Scootaloo. She rubbed a fore-hoof in the filly's mane. "Yeah, I took a quick power nap. Thanks for noticing, Scoots."

Scootaloo beamed.

Rainbow still looked tired to me. Her eyes were still a bit bloodshot, and her flying was slower than usual. Her gaze fell on the lone hayburger meal. She grabbed it in her fore-hooves. "Need me to take this extra meal off your -- hey!"

I snatched it from her with my magic. "That's for Cherry!"

"Okay, no need to get sore. Sorry."

I sighed as I put the bag down. "No, it's okay. Sorry, just a little on edge."

"Yeah, I can tell." Rainbow looked towards Town Hall. "Are they still in the meeting?"

"Yeah, an' it feels likes it's been ages since they started," complained Apple Bloom.

Sweetie Belle slurped down some of her milkshake. "I don't know whether taking this long is a good thing or a bad thing."

Rainbow smirked. "Probably just the egghead giving one of her long speeches. If she doesn't doze off halfway through it, that is."

Scootaloo suddenly thrust a fore-hoof to the side. "Look! I think it's over!"

"Finally!" Apple Bloom said.

I turned my head. Ponies poured out of the Town Hall.

"Should one of us go back and tell the others where we are?" Sweetie Belle asked.

"I'm on it," said Rainbow before she winged her way towards the crowd.

Even before Rainbow reached the Town Hall, I caught sight of Twilight, standing face to face with Matilda. The donkey's gaze was downcast, and Twilight spoke softly to her. Just as Rainbow Dash landed near them, I saw Fluttershy and Cherry. Then I finally noticed Matilda was crying.

"That don't look good," said Apple Bloom in a glum voice.

I sighed as I saw first Twilight, then Fluttershy give Matilda a hug. Matilda then turned around and drew Cherry into a tight hug as well. Nopony looked happy.

Sweetie Belle's ears drooped. "I think you're right, Apple Bloom."

Scootaloo cast her eyes downward. "Aw, all that work, and it didn't mean anything."

To my surprise, I heard not a single complaint about a lost opportunity to gain a cutie mark. They really had thrown their hearts into this. I felt almost as bad for them as I did for Cherry.

My eyes darted about the now thinning crowd. I frowned as I realized some were casting odd looks at Cherry. As the last of the ponies departed, Mayor Mare emerged from the Town Hall alongside Applejack.

"Wait, I don't remember her being at the meeting," I said.

"Yeah, I fergot ta tell ya," Apple Bloom said with a faint smile. "My sis showed up while ya were at the hayburger place and galloped right in."

Scootaloo grinned. "Ha! I would've loved to see Spoiled Rich try to give her a hard time."

Applejack concluded her conversation, and she joined Twilight, Fluttershy, Rainbow, and Cherry as they slowly headed towards our table. "Let me guess," I said when they were within earshot. "You have bad news."

Twilight sighed. "The Town Council voted in favor of Spoiled Rich's petition. Kevin won't be able to move here."

Apple Bloom banged a fore-hoof on the table. "Consarn it!"

"Normally I'd warn ya ta watch yer language," said Applejack. "But ya ain't even near as upset as I am right now."

"It was a narrow vote, though," Fluttershy said.

Applejack frowned. "An' Mayor Mare coulda overrode 'em. Considerin' how she was sick of Spoiled Rich, I'm kinda surprised she didn't."

Fluttershy shuddered. "The shouting between them was terrible."

Twilight turned to Applejack. "I understand Mayor Mare's reasons for accepting the Council's vote, even if I don't agree with them."

"What is with Spoiled Rich anyway?" Apple Bloom demanded. "Does she dream of kickin' puppies every night or somethin'?!"

Sweetie Belle frowned. "More like beating up changelings in her sleep."

Rainbow Dash coughed and looked away.

Cherry had not said a word, standing with her gaze downcast. I slid out of my seat and trotted up to her, placing a hoof gently on her shoulder. "I'm sorry it didn't work out."

She lifted her gaze and brushed a few strands of her mane from her troubled eyes. "Thank you."

Applejack stepped up to us. "Ya can be mighty proud of yer friend here, Candy. She told the whole truth 'bout herself without battin' an eye."

That was the last thing I wanted to hear, and my heart lurched when I saw Cherry staring at me, as if trying to gauge my reaction. None of my protests or worries mattered anymore, and I pulled her into a hug to prove that. I heard her sniffle once as she wrapped her fore-legs tightly around me.

Rainbow Dash asked the question that I wanted to but felt would be inappropriate coming from me. "So, um, how'd they take it?"

"As best as we could hope for," said Twilight. "Some shock, a little fear, but nothing outright hostile."

"An' I got there in time ta stop Spoiled Rich from stirrin' up the pot," said Applejack. "If the Apples give their hospitality ta somepony, I consider 'em like family so long as they're under our roof. An' I ain't gonna let nopony badmouth family."

I broke off the embrace with Cherry in time to see Twilight smile and say, "It really helped when Fluttershy spoke up for Cherry, too."

Fluttershy blushed. "I just thought if they saw somepony like me wasn't afraid of her, maybe nopony else had to be, either."

"She tried ta do the same fer Kevin, too," said Applejack. "An' I think it swayed some folks. Jus' not enough."

"Applejack, did we help any?" Apple Bloom said.

"Did anypony listen to us?" said Sweetie Belle.

"Did any of that work pay off at all?" asked Scootaloo.

Applejack smiled. "Considerin' how many ponies I saw sportin' yer buttons? Yeah, I'd say so."

The Crusaders smiled at each other and clopped a fore-hoof together.

Twilight stepped up to Cherry and me. "It seems Ponyville is just not ready for this yet." She turned to Cherry. "I'm really sorry, I know you revealed the truth about your origins in hopes it would sway their decision. That must've been hard for you."

I shivered. So much of this was eerily reminiscent of my past struggles. Cherry had shown more courage than I ever had in that regard; I had to be forced into the reveal concerning my origins, while she chose her own time and place.

"I had a little talk with the Mayor," said Applejack. "She's gonna keep me informed if anypony tries ta stir up anything against Cherry, but, honestly, I think it's gonna be okay."

I turned to Cherry. "I know you might not have much of an appetite right now, but I got you lunch from the hayburger place. I can cast the reheat spell on it."

Cherry nodded. "I am hungry, thank you." She smiled, though I could tell it was partially forced. "Maybe we can salvage the rest of the day. I think I could use a distraction."

I doubted that we would have nearly as much fun as I had originally planned, but Cherry needed me, and I wanted to be there for her like she had done for me so many times in the past. I managed a small smile of my own. "Of course. I'd be happy to."

The moon had just risen when Mom glanced out the window as she neatly placed the dishtowel back on its holder. "Now, Candy, I need to head over to the castle, and I'll likely be there all night."

"Yeah, that's fine," I said in a listless voice as I rested my head on my crossed fore-legs at the table.

"Even if we manage to help Princess Luna deal with this Tantabus-thing quickly, I see no reason to interrupt my beauty sleep, especially given how exhausted I am."

"Yeah, fine."

"Speaking of sleep, please get to bed on time," said Mom. "While I'm delighted you've taken an interest in the Shadow Spade novels that I like so much, you've spent far too many nights staying up late to read them."

I traced random patterns on the table with the edge of a fore-hoof. "Uh-huh."

"And do remember that if a flock of deadly were-breezies descends upon the boutique that they can be repulsed with sour cream and doughnuts while singing the Equestrian anthem."

"Got it." A few seconds later, I stopped, blinked, and turned my head. "Wait, what??"

Mom smiled tightly. "So you are listening to me."

I rolled my eyes. "Yes, I'm listening, you didn't have to go make up something like that. Er ... that was made up, right?"

Mom stepped up to me. "Are you still upset with what happened today? I'm terribly sorry I couldn't be there."

I waved a hoof. "Mom, it's fine, I don't think it would've mattered if you were there or not. Look, can I just go with you to the castle?"

"We've been over this before. According to Princess Luna, you're not linked to her dreams as we are. There would be nothing for you to do."

"Other than maybe show my support for her. That'll be better than I've been doing for Cherry!"

Mom gave me a confused look. "Whatever are you talking about?"

I sighed and dropped my head over my fore-legs again. "Never mind. See you in the morning, I guess."

"No," said Mom. "Out with it. What's wrong?"

I closed my eyes tightly. "I feel like maybe I should've helped Cherry more with Kevin. Maybe if I had really thrown myself into it like the other Crusaders had, it could've made a difference."

"I seem to recall you were on the fence about the issue."

I frowned and lifted my head. "That doesn't matter! I should've been there for her."

Mom considered. "Did Cherry say anything to you?"

"No, she hardly said a word for the rest of the day after that stupid meeting."

"Then I suggest that she did feel supported," said Mom.

"I feel more like I was trying to push her away from helping Kevin."

"Oh, but, dear, you had only her safety in mind when--"

I turned to her. "Just before I left her at the farm, I tried to cheer her up by reminding her that she could still help the changelings by doing what she's been doing with Twilight, and she said: it's not enough." I threw up my fore-hooves. "What's that supposed to mean? I couldn't get her to explain it to me."

Mom glanced at the window. "Candy, I truly wish I could help you through this, but I really need to go." She placed a hoof on my shoulder. "We can talk more about it in the morning. Until then, give yourself a break. Stop being hard on yourself."

Maybe I did need to take a step back. My emotions were too jumbled for me to make any sense about what I really felt. Earlier, I fought the urge to run back to the farm and insist Cherry talk to me. That would have likely made matters worse.

Fear tinged all my thoughts about Cherry, and I wasn't sure why. "I'll try. Thanks."

Mom smiled and headed towards the door.

"Um, Mom? You were kidding about were-breezies, right? Because I don't know everything about this world yet, and ..."

Mom stopped at the door, smiled, and winked before she headed out.

I dropped my head to the table and covered it with my fore-hooves. "Ugh, I really hate it when she does that."

Jump to top

Chapter 50 - Forgiveness and Fortitude

Author's Note

First off, I had briefly dropped a scene from the previous chapter, but added it back with some alterations. If you have no idea who "Summer Wind" is, please take a moment to find that scene in the previous chapter and read it.

That said, just a warning that this chapter contains some really major spoilers for fifth season episode "Do Princesses Dream of Magic Sheep?". While many chapters had minor spoilerish content, it's much more spoilery here.

And, WOW, 50 chapters! I didn't expect it to become quite this long. We're in the home stretch now, though, and the whole plot will be wrapped up soon! Thank you for sticking with the story this long.

Chapter 50 - Forgiveness and Fortitude

When my eyes open to the darkness of my own room, I initially believe I have simply stirred in my slumber. Only when I attempt to roll over and go back to sleep do I find myself in a body too big for the bed. I groan and bury my face in the pillow for a moment before turning over on my back.

I glance towards the open window. I much prefer the cool air from outside rather than the magically chilled air that is Equestria's version of air-conditioning, which Rarity sets colder than I prefer. I hear ponies milling about outside.

As I swing my legs over the side of the bed, soft hoof-falls sound from the hallway. "This is really weird," I hear Sweetie Belle say. "I wonder if anypony is here?"

She comes trotting into my room as I stand. No sooner does her gaze fall upon me when she freezes in mid-step, one fore-hoof raised, her pupils shrinking to near pin-pricks.

After several moments of uneasy silence, I say, "Something wrong, Sweetie?"

Sweetie's mouth drops open, "Candy?? I-is that you?"

I manage a tiny smile. "Of course. Who else would it be?"

"But ... I ... WOW, is this what you used to look like?"

Ponies in my dreams rarely comment on my appearance. Why would they? They're phantasms of my own mind, and I no longer worry about who knows of my origins. "I think I did tell you that I still appear this way in my dreams."

"Well, yeah, but this is MY dream." Sweetie Belle glances about. "Um, isn't it?"

My heart races. Is this really a dream? Did something suddenly go horribly awry with my transformation? Or is Discord playing a prank on me?

I run a hand through my hair. "I'm not sure anymore. I mean, yeah, shared dreams happen. That's the whole point of what Mom and the others are doing for ... um ..."

A chill radiates down my spine.

Sweetie tilts her head. "You don't suppose this is the same--"

"PONIES!"

The cry reverberates through the dreamscape, echoing inside the boutique as if it had been spoken in the next room. Sweetie Belle leaps for the window, and for a heart-stopping moment I fear she will accidentally vault herself over the windowsill. Instead, she clings to it by her fore-legs as I scramble for position next to her, my human stature forcing me to crouch.

"Look, it's Princess Luna!" Sweetie cries.

My eyes go wide when they fall upon her. The Princess is floating above the ground, inside a sphere of energy. Bright tendrils of light are wrapped about the spiral of her horn, winding up far into the night sky. Several ponies have already dropped into a bow around her.

Luna's booming but desperate voice makes my heart skip a beat. "There is no time for bowing, my friends! There is something coming, something terrible!"

"That doesn't sound good," Sweetie murmured.

Before my addled brain can think of a response, my blood turns to ice as an unnatural chill sucks all the warmth from my body. An inky darkness suddenly passes over us, like a cloud passing before the moon.

"No!" Luna cries. "It is already here!"

I lift my gaze and stare into the heavens ...

... and the heavens MOVE.

The sight has taken too much of my breath to yell a warning. I instead yank Sweetie Belle back into the room just as an amorphous indigo blob of living night soars overhead, another wave of ice crashing over me.

Sweetie's ears flatten as she shivers. "Wh-what IS that thing?!"

I am still struggling to catch my breath when Luna's voice booms out, "I am so sorry. I brought this upon you. But I will end it now!"

"It's the thing Mom talked about," I say in a quavering voice as the sky flashes with magical power. "She called it a Tantabus."

"But what did Princess Luna mean when she said--"

I heave an exasperated sigh, "Honestly, Sweetie Belle, you know as much as I do at this point! I--"

I shiver as I hear frightened screams. Sweetie rushes to the window, evading my feeble attempt to grab her. I follow her and lean my head out. I utter a sigh of relief when I see Mom and her friends standing before Luna, though Twilight's face is a mask of concern. I see her speak but cannot hear her. Only Luna's amplified voice can I hear in response, "It's ... it's taking all my strength just to hold this massive dream together!"

Sweetie gasps. "It IS the same dream! She must've pulled in all of Ponyville."

"You will have to stop it," Luna declares to Twilight and her friends. "I truly wish I did not have to ask this of you."

Luna's voice sends another chill through me, not for its words, but its tone. In all the time I have known her, she has never sounded so worried and desperate. As the others give chase to the amorphous monster, all I can think of is a single pony, and my gaze frantically searches the mayhem. "Cherry! Where's Cherry?!"

"I-I don't see her, Candy," Sweetie says. "Maybe she's still at the farm."

"That thing swept over the farm when it arrived!" My eyes widen, and I tremble as I witness the Tantabus animate an entire house into horrible, monstrous life. I pull my head back in. "I have to find her!"

Sweetie turns her head towards me. "I'll go with you!"

"NO!" I flinch as I hear more screams and terrible roars. My breath is a ragged pant as my eyes dart about the room, as if expecting the boutique itself to come alive next. "I-I mean ..."

"Maybe we can find the other Crusaders, too!"

"All right, we'll go together." I ball my hands into fists. "If only I didn't appear like this in my dreams! It'll take me forever to get over there."

"Maybe you can turn yourself back into a pony," says Sweetie. "I thought I just heard Applejack yell something about being able to do anything in--"

I roll my eyes. "Sweetie, do you really think it's that simple?"

Sweetie glances back out, her mouth dropping open. She narrows her eyes at me as she deadpans, "Big Mac just turned himself into an alicorn princess. If he can do that, you can do this."

That statement would have been funny in any other context ... no, it's still funny, I'm just not of the mindset to laugh.

Had I not wished in the past to appear as a unicorn in my dreams? If it didn't work then, why would it work--

"Whoa!" I cry as I suddenly find myself balanced on two fewer legs than my brain is expecting. I topple over onto my back, a curl of red and orange mane falling over one of my eyes.

Sweetie Belle hops down from the windowsill. "You okay?"

I roll around and right myself on my hooves. "Yeah, I'm fine," I say in a slightly breathless voice. "Let's go. Let's take the back way to avoid trouble."

We burst out the back door of the boutique and take off at a gallop. Sweetie turns her gaze to the sky. "Candy, look!"

"Sweetie, don't stop!" I cry, desperation tinging my voice.

"I'm not, but you have to see this!"

I turn my head in time to see a corner of the Tantabus rise up, exuding an appendage like a long crystal, which it uses to slice at the sky ...

... and my mouth drops open when I see it slash THROUGH the night as if it were nothing but a cloth veneer. My heart drops into my stomach when I witness the monster attempt to flow through it.

A beam of alicorn magic erupts from Twilight's horn, and the monster is repulsed. Another beam blasts from Luna's straining form and seals the breach.

"What's it doing?!" Sweetie cries.

"Nothing good!" I snap.

"Hurry, my friends!" comes Luna's voice to the others as it fades behind us.

"Maybe Princess Luna needs our help!" Sweetie says.

I grit my teeth and utter an almost explosive sigh. My heart wrenches as it is caught between two ponies I have come to love. "W-we will, once we find Cherry, but right now, we need to--"

We are both brought up short at the start of the road to Sweet Apple Acres and skid to a halt. Shimmering in the moonlight across the breadth the road are hundreds of tiny creatures on gossamer wings, looking vaguely like tiny ponies no bigger than dragonflies.

I swallow hard and back up a step. "We need to find a way around them."

Sweetie Belle smiles and steps forward. "Candy, it's okay. I guess you've never seen breezies before."

My eyes widen. "No, get back!"

"Oh, come on, a stiff wind will take care of them. They're perfectly harmless." Sweetie slows her approach. "But ... that's weird, they look like they have ..." She stops. "Fangs??" She gasps and stumbles back a step. "And creepy glowing red eyes?!"

I face-hoof. "I knew I should've brought the sour cream and doughnuts."

As one, the mass of fairy-like monsters utter a bone-chilling hiss.

Sweetie Belle screams and gallops back the way we came, and I fall into step alongside her in shared panic, the fluttering wings of the swarm rising to a terrible, purposeful drone. We take no more than a few steps when another wall of the were-breezies coalesces before us. Sweetie Belle's eyes dart about while the two phalanxes of the tiny monsters close around us, forming a circle. "We're surrounded!"

"Thank you for stating the blindingly obvious!" I yell as I search in vain for an opening. My hooves have splayed in a defensive stance as they had when I readied myself for Starswirl to channel his shield spell through my horn ...

... which gives me an idea.

I hear a loud, chilling hiss, and then Sweetie's cry as she runs in an erratic circle, a dozen were-breezies having sunk their fangs into her mane and tail. "Candy, help!"

I grit my teeth, and my horn blazes. Bright white energy expands in a hemisphere, knocking the attacking monsters from Sweetie's hair and pushing the others back.

"Nice going!" Sweetie cries.

The were-breezies hiss and spit as they charge the shield, magic crackling around them as they bounce off. "But even if I can keep this shield up, we'll just endanger Cherry if they keep following us."

Sweetie gives me a determined smile, and her horn glows. "Then we blast them!"

Could that even work? Doesn't the shield work only because I have experienced it before? We have no other choice but to try. "All right, on the count of three, I drop the shield."

Sweetie nods, her horn glowing brighter.

"One ... two ..." My gaze finds the largest concentration of our adversaries. "THREE!"

The shield drops, and fire blasts from our horns. We each tear a ragged hole through their lines, but after a moment's pause, they regroup and close in again. We fire a second and a third volley, and still they close in. My heart pounds, panic threatening to overwhelm me again.

"There's too many of them!" Sweetie cries as she lets out another blast, only to yelp when a were-breezie latches on to her tail. She snaps her tail and it goes tumbling to the side.

My mind races in too many directions. I have to focus. I need to conjure more powerful magic. Twilight knows powerful magic. What would she do to get her and a friend out of a situation like this?

Once it comes to me, I don't think, I just act. Something that would be far too foolhardy for me to ever attempt in real life becomes our salvation as I grab Sweetie in one fore-leg and will us to be on the farm.

My horn flashes brilliantly, my sense of place wrenches and my stomach along with it. A brief but bone-chilling icy chill envelopes me before the trees of an apple orchard appear around us.

"Candy, d-did you just teleport?!" Sweetie cries in awe.

My lips curl into a tremulous smile even as smoke curls from my horn. "I think I did, but don't EVER ask me to do that in real life."

Sweetie's response is drowned out by a roar and a scream. My head snaps towards the sound, and icy fear clutches at my pounding heart. Several large, monstrous creatures are arrayed near some thick bushes. They appear as frighteningly huge wolves with glowing eyes, yet as they move, it is as if they are comprised of wood rather than flesh and bone. That's when I recognize them.

A timberwolf has clamped its jaws around Cherry's tail, lifting her into the air. Her legs flail as she screams. Apple Bloom delivers a far more vicious buck to the monster than I ever thought her capable of, sending chunks of twigs and bark flying. "Let her go, ya ugly bunch o' sticks!" Apple Bloom cries.

I feel another chill as one of the timberwolves actually talks. "Never mind them, get the pony's little friend."

"LEAVE HER ALONE!" Cherry wails.

"Candy, we have to help!" Sweetie cries, lighting her horn.

"I-I'm not sure I can," I whimper as only sparks fly from mine.

"I can't do this alone. We need more firepower!"

I blink. "More fire ..."

And we get it.

"...power -- OOF!"

We both fall into seats inside a little metal room with an array of hoof-adapted controls before us. Sweetie's pupils shrink. "Did you just teleport us again? Where are we?" She lifts a hoof to her head. "And why are we wearing pith helmets?"

I can't help but laugh. I conjured the first thing that came to my mind. I look up and see a circular door with a wheel upon it. I reach up and spin the wheel easily, pushing open the door to reveal the night sky. I pull myself up.

It's exactly as I thought: a tank.

I am no military history buff. My knowledge of these things is a mish-mosh of old World War II newsreels shown in school, movies, and cartoon shows. To my mind, a tank is simply a big metal box with long treads and a big-ass gun. That's exactly what I got. The barrel of the cannon is comically long, three times the length of the body of the tank. As if in some compensation for bringing an Earth war vehicle to Equestria, it's colored lurid pink and decorated with bright flowers. I almost laugh again when the term "friendship tank" comes to mind.

My mirth is cut short when I hear a loud thud as Cherry is dropped to the ground. She whirls around and trembles alongside Apple Bloom as the timberwolves close in. "P-please, leave her alone," Cherry whimpers.

"Ya heard her, back off!" Apple Bloom cries, her voice quavering despite her bravado.

"Aim the cannon!" I shout.

Sweetie glances up. "Huh?? How do you expect me to do that?"

"Um, Sweetie? See the hoof-pedal conveniently labeled 'Aim Cannon'?"

"Oh, right."

The cannon rumbles as it swings unerringly towards the timberwolves.

"FIRE!" I cry.

I hear Sweetie Belle slam her hoof against metal, and golden fire erupts from the mouth of the cannon with a resounding boom, my ears flattening against my head as the flash illuminates the trees almost as bright as day. The timberwolves are blasted apart, bits of charred sticks and twigs exploding outward and raining down upon the grass. Smoke curls from the end of the cannon.

Sweetie Belle climbs up next to me. "We did it!"

Apple Bloom gasps as she trots over to us. "What in tarnation IS that thing??"

"Candy, Sweetie, thank you," Cherry gushes.

Sweetie peers. "Um, how do we get down?"

I answer her question by simply willing the tank away. It vanishes in a pop, and we tumble to the ground. "I'll explain it later, Apple Bloom," I say as I rise back to my hooves. "Cherry, are you okay?"

Cherry nods and turns away from me. "I am, but let me check on Wun."

I blink. "Wun? You don't mean ..."

Cherry steps up to the bushes. "Wun? You can come out now."

My mouth drops open as a little bedraggled changeling emerges from the bushes. Her wings flutter as she looks at me, her lips curling into a small smile. "Hi, Candy."

I swallow hard, no words coming to me as I stare at Wuntusix.

Sweetie Belle steps up to Apple Bloom. "We have to find Scootaloo. Princess Luna is here, she's the one behind this huge dream."

Apple Bloom gasps. "Ya mean the whole town is in this? Does it hafta do with that smoke thing we saw?"

"Yes, and--"

A rending sound in the distance draws our attention. The Tantabus, now even larger than before, has extended another appendage shaped like a pair of scissors. It cuts open the night sky with frightening ease.

"And she needs our help!" Sweetie cries.

Just as the monster attempts to escape through the tear in the sky, it is driven back by a knight-shaped Spike riding a giant Derpy. Literally nothing surprises me anymore.

"But what about the timberwolves?" Apple Bloom says. "Sometimes they pull themselves back together!"

"I'll stay with Cherry," I say. I levitate one of the sticks left behind by the fallen creatures. "My horn's working again, I can protect her." My eyes dart to Wuntusix. "Protect them, I mean."

"Good idea, Candy. Let's go, Sweetie!"

I watch them gallop off before turning to Cherry. "I don't understand. Why is Wun here?"

Cherry smiles. "In my dreams, we appear as separate entities. I have lovely, long conversations with her, and when my dreams are more lucid, I can conjure parts of our world that she didn't get to see during her time there."

"It's really good to see you again, Candy," says Wun.

I turn towards her, and my throat tightens too much for me to speak. Accepting what Wun did is much easier when she exists only as a hidden part of Cherry's mind. Now she appears as she did on a day that was both terrible and wonderful, other than in a much better state of health.

Wun's wings droop. "Is something wrong?"

I bite my lower lip. I have no business feeling any more guilt. I want to give up whatever I have left. I did so with my birth mother and with Cherry. Now I stare at the creature who would never have sacrificed herself if I had not brought her to that place. It is like I substituted one guilt for another and didn't realize it. Did that affect how I felt about Kevin moving to Ponyville? Did I simply not want a reminder?

Cherry touches a hoof to my shoulder. "Candy?"

"I-I'm fine." I look at Wun again and sigh. "No, I'm not. Wun, can I ask you something?"

Wun nods and gives me an inquisitive look.

"Wun ... do ... do you ever regret what happened?"

Wun remains silent for a moment, but then answers in a firm voice, "Not at all."

It is what I want to hear, but somehow it doesn't satisfy me. "But you hesitated."

"Only because I was surprised you asked me."

I sit down and simply nod for her to continue.

Wun steps up to me. "Maybe you don't remember, but I ... I was dying. I wouldn't have survived to the night. By the time the Princess returned from fighting the bugbear, I would have been dead."

I tremble, but my voice remains calm. "But wasn't I just taking you to die in a different location?"

Wun raises a hole-infested fore-leg, hesitates, then alights her hoof on my shoulder. I don't pull away. "You didn't force me. You didn't make me do what I did for your friend." Wun's eyes become sad. "I'm sorry, I didn't know you still felt so much uncertainty over this."

I sigh. "I didn't know myself, to be honest."

"I did," Cherry says softly.

My eyes widen. "You DID?"

"It took me a while to realize it," Cherry says. "If I hadn't been caught up in recent events, I would have channeled her for you, so you could talk to her yourself."

I look back to Wun. She is smiling. Despite the conjured dreamscape, she seems as real as she was when I first saw her weak and helpless in the castle. Even as I make peace with my actions that day, another ugly memory makes my shiver. "Wun, there's still something I never understood. Why did you even come with me? Back when I found out you replaced Sweetie Belle ... I ... I tried to hurt you! I WANTED to hurt you! I tried to take everything out on you!"

Wun nods once. "It's true, I was a little scared of you at first. But ... the way you cared about your friend so much. That meant something to me."

"And you didn't even think that I was just abusing you again? Th-that I thought you were disposable or something?"

Wun's wings quiver. "Well ... no. That wasn't your intention at all."

"But how could you ever know ..." I say in a helpless voice.

Wun smiles. "I'm a changeling. I kind of sense these things in ponies' emotions."

I am too stunned to speak. Did that incident really still haunt me this much?

"And once we were joined, I told her the kind of pony you really are, Candy," Cherry says. "That you've always been. Don't let one incident define you."

My vision becomes a watery mess as I stare at Wun. "But, I hurt you ..."

"I forgive you," says Wun. "But, please, Candy ... forgive yourself."

I then do something I never thought I would see myself do: I pull a changeling into a hug. I try very hard to let go of the regret. Even after all that I have gone through, all the guilt and pain I have left by the wayside, this proves to be the most difficult.

"I-I'll try," I whisper.

Cherry suddenly gasps. I break off the embrace and find her staring at the skies above Ponyville, her mouth dropping open. I turn my gaze skyward as well, and my heart skips a beat.

The Tantabus is even larger than ever, easily able to cover more than half the town in its twisting, inky blue darkness. The ponies attempting to contain it appear only as mere specks as they converge upon it. Yet the great monstrous form shudders, and it bloats still further.

"Candy, maybe we should help!" Cherry says.

Wun's wings buzz, and she lifts off the ground. "Yes, I want to help, too!"

My heart thunders. I want to stay as far away from that thing as possible. My heart lurches at the memory of Princess Luna sitting beside me in the castle, sharing her coffee, draping a wing around me, and making me feel like I just might be able to make the right decision.

"All right, let's go!" I cry, taking off into a gallop back towards town.

Cherry comes alongside me, but her earth pony nature soon has her pulling ahead. I utter a surprised yelp when Wun lands on my back, wrapping her legs around my barrel like she had that fateful day. She is anything but helpless now; her wings become a blur, and she helps propel me forward faster.

It is not long before Princess Luna's voice fades back into hearing. "--is how it grew strong enough to escape in the first place!"

My stomach twists. I never heard such utter despair in her voice, which quakes as if she's trying to cry at the same time. I know that sound all too well; I heard it from myself far more times than I have cared for.

I flinch at a rending noise as the Tantabus begins tearing another hole in sky. I hear Luna's strained and despondent voice. "I created the Tantabus to give myself the same nightmare every night ... to punish myself for the evil I caused as Nightmare Moon."

She ...

I ...

What??

My mind goes numb. I almost cannot believe what I have heard. Had it not been her mention of Nightmare Moon, I would wonder if somepony else said it.

As we close the distance, I can hear other ponies. Fluttershy's pleading voice rises above the din of the Tantabus. "But why would you do that?!"

And Luna responds, "To make sure I NEVER forgave myself for how much Equestria suffered because of me."

Oh, dear God.

All that time.

All her advice to me.

Everything she ever did for me.

No wonder she understood. No wonder she could empathize with me. No wonder we had bonded. Suddenly, the idea of her watching my repeating nightmare, watching Cherry -- Michelle -- die in my arms over and over and OVER and knowing the guilt I once felt takes on a whole new significance.

We burst out of an alley and come to a stumbling halt. My heart lurches as my gaze falls upon the stricken Princes Luna. The look in her eyes is one not just of despair but of sheer helplessness. Tears well up in her eyes and roll down her face. I almost want to cry with her; she looks as I once felt so many times when I first arrived in Equestria.

A sudden screeching roar from overheard makes my ears draw back, and I lift a fore-hoof as it to bolt. Cherry utters a frightened gasp, and I turn around, nearly crashing into her as she stumbles back a few steps.

The Tantabus rises into the sky to immense, terrifying height, taking on the form of a huge unicorn, or perhaps an alicorn and I simply cannot discern the wings. As its head rises, its horn sweeps through the sky, rending it as if it were paper until the opening is as large as it.

"But that just means you might be the key to stopping all this!" Twilight cries from where she stands before Luna.

Air rushes overhead. Rainbow Dash is flying around the monster's legs, wearing an odd costume. "Yeah, if it gets strong because you feel bad about what you did as Nightmare Moon, then you just gotta stop feeling bad for what you did!"

No, Rainbow. It's not that easy. You have no idea how hard it is to give up such a deep-seated feeling, no matter how much pain it causes you.

"H-how can I forgive myself?" Luna cries as her tears drip to the ground. "I am no better now than I was then. My creation is about to turn the world into a living nightmare!"

My blood runs cold. The creature is already walking through the tear that I now know links the dreamscape with the real world.

"But look at what you're doing," says Twilight. "Nightmare Moon would've WANTED the Tantabus to turn Equestria into a nightmare." Her friends gather around her, and my heart flutters when I see Mom standing among them. "You're doing everything you can to stop it!"

I don't know what to do. Should I go up there? Should I shout something to her from where I stand? Do I even have a right to intervene? Would I just make things worse? Who am I to help with this sort of thing anyway?

"Don't you see?" Twilight cries. "That proves you're not the same pony you were then."

(I told her the kind of pony you really are, Candy, that you've always been)

"Everypony who knows you knows that Nightmare Moon was in the past."

(Don't let one incident define you)

And then I am crying along with Princess Luna. Cherry wraps a fore-leg around me tightly, and Wuntusix hugs me. I swallow hard and cast my gaze towards Luna.

"We all trust you Luna," says Twilight. "Do you trust in us to believe we're right?"

Luna's eyes rise to the Tantabus, then come level. Her gaze locks with mine.

Is she surprised to see me? Is she seeing me at all?

Please remember, Princess. Please think about what you did for me. Think about our conversations, about the way you comforted me. I've grown to love you, Luna. I don't want to see you do this to yourself.

Please ... forgive yourself.

Her lips suddenly curl into a smile. "I do!"

The Tantabus utters a wrenching screech as it recoils from the tear, its ethereal head molding itself into an expression of surprise and shock. The monster suddenly shrinks, the opening in the heavens sealing itself.

Did I do anything? As much as I needed to be there for Cherry, I wish we returned earlier. I want to believe I connected with Luna in that brief moment.

The Tantabus is now no larger than Luna herself. It turns almost casually, walking on air as it approaches its creator. After a pause, energy crackles around it as it enters the sphere of energy surrounding Luna. It merges with her, a living piece of guilt that she gave physical form in her dreams. The last of it disappears into the crescent-moon symbol on the chest of her outfit.

Luna lowers her gaze to the six. "Thank you!"

The dreamscape starts to fade to white, and my presence becomes more tenuous until I am barely aware that I am at the tail end of a shared dream. I struggle to see her through the deepening mist.

"Thank you, all ..."

As I sat at the table in the familiar confines of the kitchen in the boutique, I felt I had come full circle. Dinner was graced by an additional guest that evening, and I smiled at Cherry from across the table as she chatted away with Sweetie Belle.

"So why were those timberwolves attacking you in the dream, Cherry?" Sweetie asked.

Cherry paused to finish the bit of salad she was chewing before replying. "The Tantabus was feeding off ponies' fear, I think. I still have fears of what might happen to changelings that mean nopony any harm. And, well, maybe Apple Bloom shouldn't have shared that scary story about timberwolves right before bed."

Sweetie Belle giggled. I smirked and propped my head up with a fore-leg as I flicked my gaze to Mom. "And we all know who we have to thank for the Attack of the Were-Breezies!"

Mom lowered her head. "Ugh, you are never going to let me live that down, are you?"

I lowered my voice in a passable imitation of Big Mac. "Nnope."

Both Cherry and Sweetie laughed. Mom lifted her head and smiled faintly.

I grinned. "Hey, you have enough things to tease me about, let me have this one."

Sweetie Belle smiled. "I'm just glad we were able to help Princess Luna."

My grin faded a bit, but I otherwise refused to give any clue as to what I was really thinking. Yet Mom knew me too well, and I felt her place a hoof on my shoulder.

"I'm fine," I said softly. I turned my gaze back to Cherry. "So, um, you're really that worried about the changelings?"

It was really a stupidly trite thing to say, as it was obvious to everypony what Cherry believed. Nevertheless, she saw it for what it was, an attempt to steer the conversation in another direction. She nodded. "Perhaps it's a foolish fear, but I can't ignore it."

"If it helps any, darling, the residents of Ponyville are not given to rash acts of violence," Mom said. "Even Spoiled Rich, with all her bluster, would never call for something like that."

Sweetie Belle frowned. "I doubt she'd lift a hoof to help if it did happen, though."

Mom sighed. "Well, yes, there is that."

"Candy mentioned you want to do more to help the changelings, Cherry," Sweetie said. "Do you know what you want to do?"

Cherry remained silent as she picked up the glass of juice in her fore-hooves. Her eyes flicked over to me for a moment, and she took a sip before replying. Her eyes became subdued as she replied in a soft voice, "I have some ideas, but I'm not sure yet. I want to talk to Twilight about it first."

"Care to share?" I prompt her.

"Not quite yet." Cherry sighed. "I'm sorry, Candy, I just--"

I waved a fore-hoof. "It's fine. Tell me when you're ready."

She smiled. "I will, I promise." She set down her glass. "I guess in a way, I have Princess Luna to thank. While I never would have wished her woes upon her, it made me realize I can't just sit and wait for things to happen."

That comment alone said volumes, and my heart ached.

The conversation bounced around to other topics, but I mostly withdrew. I considered mentioning meeting Summer Wind, but the last thing I needed was Mom gushing over me meeting a potential coltfriend. She meant well, but I had trouble getting her to realize things like that were still likely a fair way off in the future.

As the meal was about to wrap up, we were startled by the sound of a knock at the front door. Mom glanced at the window, where the moon hung in the darkened, starry skies just above the horizon. "Who could be coming to call at this time of night?"

"You want me to get it?" I said, motioning to climb out of my chair.

Mom touched a fore-hoof to me. "I'll see to it."

I had hoped for an excuse to leave the table, but I nodded as she headed off.

"Do you sometimes get customers this time of night?" Cherry asked.

"Sometimes. Usually it is for me." I heard the bell of the front door tinkle, and a surprised exclamation from Mom. "Emergency repair or alteration. Usually somepony who was going to attend some party or go on a date and had a last-minute problem."

"That's very nice of you to do that for them," Cherry said, smiling.

I smiled faintly in return. "Would be better if I could figure out what my talent is." I touched a fore-hoof to my horn. "Haven't seen this thing glow mysteriously in a while."

"You've been busy getting ready to start school," said Sweetie Belle.

I sighed. "Yeah, and I'm afraid once school starts, I--"

"Candy?" said Mom as she stepped into the room, smiling. "It's for you."

I rolled my eyes and slid off my seat. "I could've told you that. What is it this time? Patch? Repair? Alteration?"

"None of the above," said Mom. "Just go look."

I raised an eyebrow. Why all the secrecy? I shrugged and headed out of the kitchen. Either way, maybe having something to do would keep my mind off things. Yet as I trotted into the front room, all other thoughts flew out of my head as my eyes fell upon our nocturnal visitor.

"Hello, Candy," said Princess Luna, a soft smile gracing her muzzle.

My eyes misted, and I trembled as I fought to contain myself. Yet the memory of what I had seen and heard was too fresh, and I gave into the urge to do what I should have done in the dream. I bolted across the room and hugged her.

She folded her wings around me. "Candy ..."

"I-I'm sorry I couldn't do more to help," I said in a quavering voice as I fought back tears. I pressed my face into her soft fur. "A-all that time, I never knew ... I never knew ..."

Her wings tightened around me. "Shh, it's okay."

"But y-you helped me so much, and the least I could do was--"

"Candy, please, stop," Luna said firmly. "Look at me."

I drew in a ragged breath as I lifted my head, my eyes meeting her teal gaze.

Luna smiled. "That's why I wanted to visit you tonight. I wanted to thank you as well. I didn't get a chance before as I had exhausted my energy in keeping that dream together." Her smile widened. "And I had my own pleasant dreams to attend to."

"But I-I didn't do anything!"

"Sometimes, all it takes a single look."

My eyes widened. "You saw me?"

"Yes. And Cherry. And Wuntusix." Her eyes misted. "Seeing you all together, knowing the love you felt for one another helped me realize some of the good I had done. Just like seeing the Crusaders reminded me of their nightmares I had dispelled. Twilight's words were powerful, but I needed a little more."

My lips twitched into a smile.

"You were not the sole reason I finally forgave myself, but you did play your part. Don't ever underestimate yourself, Candy Swirl."

My smile widened. That was the same thing Mom had said to me some time ago.

I could have wished to call Luna family. If my aunt back on Earth had even a fraction of her wisdom and love, maybe my home life would not have been on the list of things I was trying to run away from.

I hugged her one more time. "Thank you, Princess, this means a lot to me."

Luna returned the hug. "I must be off, but I am sure we will meet again soon, whether in the waking world or the dreamscape."

I smiled as I slowly pulled back. "I'll look forward to it either way."

Luna smiled before she slipped out the door. I held the door open with my magic for the pleasure of seeing her open her beautiful wings and fly off.

My smile remained as I stared up into the lovely night sky. For the first time in a long while, I truly felt good about myself. Now I could face the next challenges that awaited me, whether it be struggling to find my talent, or starting school, or dealing with a new round of peer pressure.

Or what my dear friend Cherry would have to tell me soon. I needed all my fortitude for that.

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Chapter 51 - Saying Goodbye [Re-edited]

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Chapter 52 - Affairs of the Heart

I had taken no more than a single tentative step into Sugarcube Corner when Sunny rushed up to me. "Candy! I'm so glad you're here. I was a little worried you might not show up."

I gave her a weak smile as my gaze flicked around the store. I had purposely shown up late in hopes of slipping in mostly unnoticed. Instead, Sunny's enthusiastic announcement of my arrival made several ponies look in my direction. "Um, yeah, sorry, I got delayed."

"It's fine, we've only just gotten started." Sunny turned towards one of the tables where a bunch of colts sat. My ears twitched when I saw Summer Wind among them. "Here, let me introduce you to a few of my friends."

My gaze fell on Summer. "But, um, I already know ..."

I trailed off when she simply turned and headed to the table. I managed not to sigh and followed. I glanced to the side and saw a familiar pony that I would rather be talking to. Scootaloo stood near Sunny's little brother, an excited little pegasus with a blue coat and bright yellow mane.

"Hey, guys," said Sunny as she reached the table. I trailed a few steps behind her. "This is my friend Candy Swirl who I told you about."

Summer Wind smiled. "We've met. Nice to see you again, Candy."

I forced a small smile and just nodded.

"Oh, yes, that's right, I remember Candy mentioning you," said Sunny.

"Hope she said good things about me," Summer said to the chuckles of his compatriots. I tried to join in, but my voice cracked, and I wound up just awkwardly clearing my throat.

Sunny smirked at him before pointing to another pegasus seated next to Summer, one with a sky-blue coat and darker blue mane. "This is Clear Skies." She pointed to the unicorn next to him with an orange coat and bright red mane. "Bright Flame, aaand ..." She jabbed a hoof towards the last, an earth pony with a gray coat and a brown mane. "Stronghoof, or just Strong for short."

Clear leaned back in his seat and casually stretched his wings. "Yo."

Bright smiled and nodded once. "Hi, there, Candy."

Strong leaned forward, leaning his head on a fore-hoof. His lips curled into something between a grin and a smirk. "Heya, Candy, how's it going?"

I opened my mouth to reply and hesitated. Strong was one of the colts who had passed me in the hall just before Sunny had invited me to this party. "Um, hi, all."

Sunny turned to me. "Why don't you take a seat, and I'll get us all something to drink."

My ears drew back slightly. "Er ..."

Sunny stepped closer and whispered, "Come on, Candy, it's okay. Just relax."

Easier said than done, but I nodded just the same. She smiled and headed off. My eyes followed her as Scootaloo looked in my direction. She smiled and waved a fore-hoof. I smiled and waved back.

"Candy?"

I flinched at Summer's voice and whipped my head towards the table. "Oh, um, sorry," I said sheepishly as I took a seat. "Just happened to spot a friend."

Clear cast a lazy glance in the same direction. "You know the little orange squirt?"

"Her name's Scootaloo," I said in a more curt voice than intended.

"Isn't she the one who can't fly yet?"

He had asked it in a rather casual voice, but I snapped out a reply anyway. "What difference does that make?"

Clear shrugged. "Nothing, really. Just commenting."

"Oh," I said in a small voice.

Clear yawned through his next sentence, "Hope she gets to fly soon."

Summer jabbed his friend in the side with his wing. "Seriously, Clear, if you were any more laid back, you'd fall over."

The others chuckled, and I managed a tiny smile. Clear just raised one corner of his mouth and shrugged again.

"Anyway, the kid is like blaze lightning on that scooter of hers," said Summer. "Surprised she doesn't have that as a cutie mark yet."

I glanced at Strong as Summer spoke. He still had his eyes fixed on me, and when Summer mentioned about a cutie mark, I swore I saw his gaze flick to my flank and linger there for a moment.

"Hey, um, Candy?" said Bright in a tentative voice. "Can I ask you something?"

I braced myself. "Sure."

"Sunny said you're taking Arcane Theorems. Is that true?"

"Um, yeah, why?"

He smiled. "That's kinda impressive."

"It is?"

"Yeah. Lots of unicorns don't mess with it. They just learn basic spells, or spells related to their talent, and don't bother with the academic stuff behind it."

"I guess I wanted to understand how things work rather than just memorizing runes and incantations," I said.

Bright nodded. "That's what I think, too."

I smiled slightly. "Are you taking it?"

"I took it last year," said Bright in a more relaxed voice. His smile widened. "Glad I did. I think it helped me get my cutie mark."

Strong snorted. "After nearly burning down the school."

Bright blushed hard. I wanted to glance at his cutie mark but I was still too worried about giving the wrong idea. It didn't help that Strong kept his eyes locked on me the whole time.

"Oh, knock it off, Strong," said Summer with a smirk. "It wasn't that bad."

"No worse than what Sunny did in chemistry?" I heard myself say.

Bright and Summer laughed, and Clear just grinned. I managed a more natural smile.

Sunny appeared moments later, levitating six ice cream sodas. "Oh, I can't leave any of you alone for even a few minutes before you start shamelessly gossiping about me!" she cried in mock-indignation as she set down the sodas before taking her seat, which mercifully interrupted Strong's gaze.

"Then stop doing silly things in class," said Strong.

Sunny rolled her eyes and pretended to "accidentally" spill his drink on his fur with a nudge of magic. I had to smirk at that.

"Maybe the class will help you, too, Candy," said Bright.

I looked at him. "Hmm?"

"With your cutie mark. Getting it, I mean."

Strong snorted. "Really, Bright, you've got all the subtlety of Tirek."

"Look who's talking," Summer quipped.

Bright's pupils shrank. "Well, I ... er ... sorry, Candy, I ..."

"There's nothing to be sorry about," I declared. "I don't mind talking about it at all."

That was mostly true. I just didn't want Bright to feel bad about having mentioned it. And, frankly, Stronghoof was getting on my nerves.

"Hey," said Clear, startling me. He had been so quiet he had all but faded into the background. He jabbed a wing towards me. "All this talk about cutie marks reminds me where I saw you before."

"Um, really?" I said.

One corner of his mouth rose. "Yeah. I've seen you hanging out with ..." He flicked a wing towards Scootaloo. "... the little squirt and her friends. What do they call themselves?"

I grinned slightly. "The Cutie Mark Crusaders."

Bright smiled. "I think that's cool how they work together to get their cutie marks."

"Even if they do some crazy things to get them," said Sunny.

"Still, you gotta hoof it to them," said Summer. "They got a lot of determination."

"Can't fault 'em for that," Clear said as he stretched again. "Who knows? Maybe it'll actually work."

"I like them," said Bright. "And ... I sort of know how they feel."

My smiled widened. "Yeah, so do I, on both counts."

Bright turned to me. "So, um ... about your Arcane Theorems class ..."

I spent much of the rest of the party talking to Bright Flame, as he seemed to be the one I got along with best. I was glad I did for other reasons; despite being open to first year students, I learned from him that the class got really tough in the second half of the semester. Even the best magic students had trouble pulling off an "A." It didn't help matters that the instructor was Red Quill, the same instructor who had given me the aptitude tests and one of the toughest graders among the faculty.

I started to wonder if I'd need some help from Twilight.

By the time the party broke up, I had relaxed enough that I could ignore Stronghoof ogling me. "Candy, thank you so much for coming!" Sunny gushed as we headed away from the table.

I smiled. "Yeah, it turned out better than I thought it would."

"And now you know a few more ponies from school. I think this worked out great."

I nodded. "Thank you for doing this, it really helped."

"Um, Candy?" I heard Bright Flame call out from behind us. "Can you wait up a bit?"

Sunny gave me a knowing smile, and I rolled my eyes at her. "Oh, stop," I said softly.

"I know, I know, but just in case, I'll leave you two alone." Sunny winked and headed away.

I took a deep breath and turned to face Bright. "Sure, what's up?"

Bright stopped before me, leaving a respectful distance between us. "I just wanted to say, if you ever need help with that class, please let me know?"

I blinked. "Oh, um ..."

"I mean, I've helped tutor a few other ponies, too."

"You have?"

Bright smiled and nodded. "Yeah. I got the highest marks in that class last year. Oh, uh, I didn't mean that as boasting or that I think you'll do bad, I just--"

I rolled my eyes. "Bright, it's okay. Sounds like you should be proud you did so well."

Bright's smile widened. "Thanks, Candy. I'm really glad I met you. Sunny was right, you're a cool pony to be around."

I smiled as well. "Thank you."

"I'll see you around school, Candy. Take care."

"You, too."

I watched him go, and now I could take a better look at his cutie mark, though he had already discussed his special talent with me: a curling tongue of flame, symbolizing his skill at magically generating and controlling fire.

For once, I didn't worry so much that his gesture was a possible overture for dating me. Really, what if it was? I could handle a "study date." That was the pace I needed, something really slow that set no expectations. Right now he was a friend; anything else could wait.

I headed out of Sugarcube corner and spotted Scootaloo boarding her scooter. I was about to trot over to her when I heard a voice call out that made me flinch, "Heya, Candy, got a minute?"

I froze with one fore-hoof in the air as I snapped my head around and brought my gaze to bear on Stronghoof. "That depends," I said in a wary voice. "What's up?"

"You're new in town, right?" he said as he approached.

I slowly lowered my hoof. "Yeah, sorta. Why?"

He stopped a little closer to me than I preferred, but I didn't back away. "How about I take you on a tour of the town?"

"Um ..."

"Then after maybe we can stop at the cafe for some dinner? My treat."

I sighed. "Sorry, I'm flattered, but I'm not interested."

"You sure?"

This time, I did take a step back. "Yes, I'm sure."

As I stepped back, my side turned towards him slightly, and I caught him taking a blatant look at my flank before he said, "Hey, I can tell you a lot about this town that doesn't make the news."

I turned myself so he was forced to look at my face and no other part of me. "So?"

"So doesn't that sound like it might be interesting?"

"Not really, no."

Strong smirked. "Wow, I've heard you play hard to get, but this is ridiculous."

I narrowed my eyes. "You're assuming I'm trying to be 'got' in the first place."

Strong rolled his eyes and waved a hoof. "Look, I just want to take a pretty filly out on the town, that's all. Nothing more serious than that."

I backed up from him another few steps. "I'm sorry, but no."

"Are you really sure you won't--?" Strong started to say.

A sudden rush of wing interrupted him, and Summer Wind hovered between us. "Strong, you really are a good friend, but you sure as hay can be a pain in the flank sometimes."

Strong frowned. "What's it to you?"

"Candy told you 'no,'" Summer declared. "Back off."

Strong raised an eyebrow. "You sure you're not just pining for her yourself?"

"What I feel is none of your business. The point is, Candy is not used to your, ah, style."

I wanted to stomp my hoof in frustration at both of them. Instead, I seethed quietly until this was over.

Strong sighed. "All right. Yeah, sorry."

"I'm not the one you need to apologize to."

Strong stepped around him and looked at me. I gave him a wary look as he said, "Hey, Candy, I'm sorry. I, uh, kinda get carried away sometimes when I see a pretty filly, you know?"

His voice certainly did sound more contrite, but my nerves were still raw. "No, I don't know. But, yeah, whatever. It's fine."

"Anyway, uh, see you around school," Strong murmured before he headed off.

Summer shook his head and watched Strong go before turning towards me. "Sorry about that. His tastes in fillies tends to run into the exotic."

I stared. "Exotic? Me? You're kidding, right?"

"Part of it has to do with you not having a cutie mark yet," said Summer.

"That makes me exotic??"

"Well, to him, anyway. And he probably heard you're from waaay out of town."

I frowned. "Wonderful."

"Try not to be too upset with him. He can be a nice guy when you get to know him."

I marched up to Summer. "Okay, fine. Now you answer me something."

Summer flinched, but remained hovering where he was. "Um, sure."

"Are you still holding out some sort of hope that I'll go out with you?"

He scratched his head. "Yeah, I still wouldn't mind going out with you. But like I was trying to tell Stronghoof, no means no. I'm not going to keep asking you."

"So then why did you intervene just now?" I demanded.

He blinked. "Why wouldn't I?"

I hesitated. Maybe I had misread his intentions, but I had to be sure. "I just don't want you thinking you have to protect me."

Summer paused. "Well ... I didn't mean it that way."

"Because as much as I appreciated you stepping in like that, you can't keep doing that for me. I have to stand on my own four hooves."

"I know that, but--"

"I just want to make sure you did this as a friend and not for any other reason."

Summer sighed but smiled. "Wow, you really know how to get to the heart of the matter, don't you?"

"I've had some practice."

"Let's put it this way," Summer said in a softer voice. "You're not the only pony trying to wrap their head around this whole dating thing."

I tilted my head. "Huh?"

Summer spread his fore-hooves. "I mean, sometimes I don't know what the hay I'm doing either." He threw a fore-hoof at the Castle of Friendship. "This place is like Friendship and Harmony Central, you'd think they could figure this out, too!"

I had to laugh at that.

"But, really, I just didn't want Strong to put his hoof too far into his mouth, you know?" said Summer. "I saw how he was looking at you at the party and thought he might get a little too pushy." He averted his eyes for a moment. "And ... okay, maybe there was kinda sorta a little of something else in my motivations. Just a tiny bit."

I gave him a level look and raised an eyebrow, hoping the gesture would be as effective on him as when Mom used it on me.

Summer shrank back a bit. "Candy, maybe you don't realize it, but, well, you are attractive, and I don't mean just the way you look. So, you're going to get ponies who are interested in you." Summer rolled his eyes. "And they're not all like Stronghoof."

"No, some of them fly and still hold out false hope."

"Ouch." Summer smirked faintly. "Eh, I deserved that."

I shook my head. "No, that was me being too hard on somepony again, I'm sorry."

"Don't be. The way you're so direct like that is one of the things I like about you. Other ponies like it, too, believe it or not."

I managed a small smile. "Don't get me wrong, Summer, I really do appreciate your help and your honesty. I just don't want you holding out for something I can't give you."

"I won't, I promise," said Summer. He suddenly chuckled.

I tilted my head. "What's so funny?"

"I think this is the best I've ever felt after being turned down."

I snorted. "I'll try to take that as a compliment."

Summer lifted a fore-hoof and gave me a hopeful look. "Still friends?"

My smile widened, and I bumped my fore-hoof against his. "Still friends."

Summer smiled. "Thanks, Candy. I'll see you around." He turned and flew off.

As I watched him fly away, Scootaloo approached me. "What was all that about?"

I turned and grinned at her. "I'll, uh, tell you when you're older."

Scootaloo frowned and scrunched up her muzzle. "Ick, that means it's girly romance stuff!"

I laughed. Well, maybe not quite romance, but close enough. "Yep, that's what it was. So I don't think you'd want to hear about it anyway."

"You got that right," said Scootaloo. "Ugh, I hope that stuff never happens to me."

I decided not to burst her bubble. "Sorry I didn't get a chance to talk to you at the party."

She smiled. "No worries, Candy. Sweetie told me you were spending more time with ponies your own age. So long as you're making new friends, that's all that matters."

I smiled. "You got that right."

"Miss Swirl! Miss Swirl, please, a moment of your time!"

I sighed at the sound of hoof-beats thundering towards me as I headed back to the boutique, and I turned in time to see Doctor Whooves skid to a halt. "What is it, Doctor?"

Doctor Whooves took out a pocket-watch and gave it a frantic look before turning his attention back to me. "Might I beseech of you to tell me when the boutique will be open today? It is of utmost importance!"

"I wasn't planning on opening it at all today."

The Doctor snapped his watch closed and gasped. "You're not planning on ... I am afraid I do not understand."

"My mother is out of town for a while, and she didn't want me spending too much of my time at work."

He uttered a despairing sigh. "Great whickering stallions! This is a disaster of immense proportions!"

I glanced nervously at his watch. "Uh, this doesn't have to do with one of those timey-wimey things you tried to explain to me the other day, does it?"

"Oh, no, not at all, that would be easy!"

I nodded once. "Uh-huh. Right."

"Please, Miss Swirl, I beg of you," said the Doctor. "Might you make a small exception for me? This really is quite urgent."

Honestly, I had nothing better to do with the rest of the day. I had actually considered opening the shop anyway and deal with a minor dressing down from Mom later. "Does this have anything to do with Roseluck?"

His pupils shrank. "Dear Celestia, has the gossip already spread?!"

"Um, I didn't mean ..."

"Rumors and hearsay! Nothing more!"

I smirked. "I'll take that as a yes."

The Doctor blushed. "Er, well ...."

"And since you asked so nicely, I'll open the boutique for you."

Doctor Whooves put his watch away and smiled. "Jolly good, Miss Swirl! Thank you!"

I had him wait outside the front entrance, as I did not have the front door keys with me. I headed in the back way and unlocked it from within. "Now what's this all about, Doctor?"

"Ah, well," he said in a hesitant voice as he approached the counter. "It has something to do with the suit you patched for me."

"What about it?"

The Doctor glanced nervously to the side. "Well, it, ah, didn't quite come out as I had hoped."

I sighed and nodded. "I know."

His gaze snapped to mine. "You do?"

"It still looks obviously patched, right?"

"Please do not take this the wrong way, Miss Swirl," said Doctor Whooves. "But I was expecting ... ah ..."

"Magic?"

"To be blunt, yes," said the Doctor. "This is not meant to be a reflection on your skills as a seamstress, Miss Swirl, just--"

I held up a hoof. "No big deal. I understand."

"Just when I saw what miracle you had wrought with Miss Bon Bon's dress, I was sure that was your particular talent."

"I'm as mystified about it as you are," I said. "So what can I do for you?"

The Doctor cleared his throat awkwardly. "Despite how swimmingly things were going, we, um, got into a bit of a tiff the other day." He smiled. "I want to make it up to her by taking her out on the town, and I wish to impress upon her my perfect flair for style. Thus I need a replacement for the suit."

I cast a wary look at him. "Um, okay, but all I can do is take your measurements."

His smile faded. "Come again?"

"I'm not skilled enough to create a whole suit for you, it will have to wait until Mom gets back."

The Doctor's pupils shrank. "And when will that be?"

"Not sure. I got a letter from her this morning. She's getting more orders than anticipated for her new dress design."

Doctor Whooves threw up a fore-hoof. "Oh, no, what am I to do?! Roseluck leaves town for a few weeks to visit relatives starting tomorrow, and I don't want her going away upset with me!"

And I thought I was hopeless when it came to romance. I wanted to help him, but if I left it to just logic to determine what to say next, I'd never get anywhere. I instead felt a tug from my intuition and went with the first thing that entered my head. "Hey, um, let me ask you something."

The Doctor had pulled out his pocket-watch again and was staring at it. "Yes, of course."

"Remember the day of Matilda and Cranky's wedding?"

The Doctor looked towards me and smiled. "How could I not? It's where I met her."

"So you went even though you couldn't get your suit altered in time?"

He nodded. "Very true, but ... say, how did you know about--"

"Never mind!" I said quickly. "What did you do?"

"Well, I simply threw on this really long multicolored scarf," he said. "It was a bit tacky, but I had to have something!"

"So, okay, you wore the long ... multicolored ... uh ..."

The Doctor tilted his head. "Something the matter, Miss Swirl?"

Nope, not going there. "Nothing at all, Doctor. Anyway, did it matter to her that you weren't in the suit?"

He paused. "Well, no, actually."

"Did anyone else at the wedding care?"

"Come to think of it, not really," said Doctor Whooves. "Though there was that changeling chap who likely distracted some of the other ponies."

I considered for a moment. "You ever wear that suit at all?"

"Well, yes," The Doctor smiled. "Ah ... and Roseluck happened by and complimented me on it."

I grinned. "Oh, did she now?"

Doctor Whooves blushed. "Well, in a friendly way, I wish to emphasize!" He paused a long moment. "But ... she did invite me out to dinner."

"And ...?"

"We had a right lovely time," said the Doctor softly. "That sort of set the proverbial ball rolling, as it were."

"And did she care about the patch in the suit?"

He smiled. "She thought I looked rather dapper, actually."

"Then there's no problem," I declared. "Wear the suit as it is."

He blinked. "Are you sure, Miss Swirl?"

"Look, it's obvious Roseluck doesn't care about what you're necessarily wearing. She seems to care about you."

The Doctor snapped his pocket-watch closed. "Really?"

I sighed. "Okay, I'm not an expert on romance by any means, but--"

He blushed again. "Oh, b-but this may not necessarily--"

"Whatever it is, Doctor, friendship or romance, it doesn't matter." I thought back to how easily I had made friends with Bright Flame at the party. "What matters is she's accepted you as you are. All she cares about is you being with her. I mean, she may even appreciate you not putting on airs for her and just going with what's comfortable to wear."

Doctor Whooves averted his eyes for a moment. "Well, ah ... funny thing is, Miss Swirl, what we argued about was that I just might have a propensity for being a bit of a perfectionist when it comes to my own actions."

I faced-hoofed. "Seriously?"

"Please understand, Miss Swirl! I want everything to be just right!"

"But you just said she doesn't care if everything is perfect, especially if she accepted you in a suit that was patched!" I smirked. "Okay, now I can give you proper advice. I just made a new friend today without trying to be perfect or trying to impress him. Another pony had asked me out a few days ago and told me today it wasn't just how pretty I looked that attracted him. You don't need anything fancy if she likes you for who you are."

Doctor Whooves appeared to ponder this intensely for a few moments before banging a fore-hoof on the counter. "Great whickering stallions, you're right, Miss Swirl! Why did I not see that for myself?!"

I smirked. "One can only speculate."

He smiled. "I will do exactly as you said, Miss Swirl! I will proudly wear that suit and have the time of my life with her." He bolted from the counter and threw open the front door. "Now, I am off to apologize for my earlier behavior and ask her to dinner with me tonight, and I will do so with pride and confidence! Allons-y!" He galloped out the door.

Did he just say ...?

No. Still not going there.

I looked up from where I laid stretched out on my bed that evening, one of Mom's Shadow Spade novels open before me, when I heard soft hoof-falls approach my room. Sweetie Belle poked her head inside and said in a tentative voice, "Hey, um, Candy? You got a minute?"

"Sure thing." I slipped a bookmark in place and closed the book, levitating it back onto the shelf. "It's getting late anyway, I should be getting to bed soon." I sat up. "What's up?"

Sweetie trotted into the room and jumped up onto the bed, sitting down beside me. "I kinda wanted to talk to you about something."

"I did sense something's been on your mind for a while," I said softly.

"It started when Cherry left."

I gave her a wan smile. "I miss her, too."

Sweetie smiled faintly. "It's sorta more than that. Um, I told you about that thing coming up in a few weeks, right?"

I paused as I tried to recall it. She couldn't be talking about the next major holiday, as that would be Nightmare Night, which was still over a month away. "Oh, wait, yeah. The Sisterhooves Social, right?"

Sweetie Belle nodded. "I was planning on doing it with Rarity this year like I always do, but that was before she fostered you."

"I think I see where this is going. Sweetie, if you still want to to do it with Mom, go ahead."

Sweetie gave me a pained look. "Are you sure?"

I wrapped a fore-leg around her and gave her a quick hug. "I'm sure. Go for it."

Sweetie slowly smiled. "This is why I wish Cherry hadn't gone away. You two could've entered."

I tilted my head. "But we're not sisters. Maybe we were as close as sisters could be, but--"

Sweetie Belle waved a fore-hoof. "They're kinda lax about who can enter. Scootaloo doesn't have a sister, so Rainbow Dash will be doing the Social with her, even though they're not related. I just didn't want you to miss out."

I grinned. "It's okay, really. A city girl like me is not much for those kind of games anyway."

"You've been talking about cities a lot lately."

"I have?"

Sweetie nodded. "Too bad you couldn't go up to Canterlot with Rarity. I've been there, and it seems like a big place to me."

I supposed I had been bringing it up in my conversations lately. Perhaps Canterlot was considered a big city by pony standards, though I would bet if it were spread out, it could fit neatly inside the borough of Queens in New York with room left over.

"Do you miss it?" Sweetie asked. "The big city you grew up in on your world, that is."

I smiled faintly. "I suppose I still do, in a way. I mean, don't get me wrong, I enjoy living with those I love and the friends I've made, but it's hard to forget what was so much a part of my life for so long."

"You just hadn't mentioned it very much until recently."

I thought on it for a moment. "I think I know why."

Sweetie gave me an interested look. "You do?"

I nodded, my smile widening. "For so long, my memories of that place were tied up in all the pain I felt over Cherry and my birth mother. But before all that started, I had a lot of good memories. Now that I've made my peace with all the bad stuff, it stopped overshadowing the good stuff. Does that make any sense?"

Sweetie Belle smiled. "Yeah, it does." She gave me a hug. "I'm so glad you feel better about everything."

My words to her harbored no hint of doubt, and I believed them wholeheartedly. Somehow, though, I felt a lingering twinge of ... something. I couldn't understand exactly what it was, just something still bothering me. It made little sense.

Sweetie Belle laid a hoof on mine. "Candy?"

I smiled. "No worries, I was just thinking. Let's get on to bed, it's getting late."

Sweetie nodded and hopped off the bed. "Good night, Candy."

"Good night, Sweetie."

I had a fanciful notion as I got ready for bed. Maybe I could work in Mom's new boutique during next summer when I was out of school. Maybe Canterlot would seem like a big city to me given what I've become accustomed to. Maybe that would satisfy whatever lingering desire for a more urban landscape that still tugged at me.

So many maybes.

I suddenly smiled as I left the bathroom. Despite my lingering troubled thoughts, a wave of good feeling came over me, as if I had just helped accomplish something important. What that could be remained uncertain, yet I simply knew something had happened, just as assuredly as I knew...

... that my horn was glowing.

My mouth dropped open, my hoof still on the light switch as the aura about my horn illuminated the otherwise dark room in a pale glow. I rushed back into the bathroom and stood before the mirror. As I raised a hoof to it, the glow subsided, and only moonlight remained.

I scrambled for the light switch and craned my neck, but my flank remained blank.

What had just happened? Did it have anything to do with Doctor Whooves and Roseluck? If only I could be there when the magic triggered! I had no recourse but to wait until I could talk to him again.

Even if I did find it had happened again, something was missing, something I couldn't quite grasp. Yet I never felt as close to understanding as I did at that moment.

Jump to top

Chapter 53 - City Bound

"I'm really excited about the Sisterhooves Social this year, Rarity," said Sweetie Belle over breakfast two Saturday mornings later. "It's nice to know that it really is you I'm with."

I grinned faintly. She had told me the story of the first time they had done the Social together, and she had gone through the whole thing thinking her partner was Applejack.

Mom sighed but smiled gently. "I see Candy's been a bad influence on you after all."

I blinked as I set down my fork. "I did what now?"

Mom gave me an amused look. "Having my little sister tease me about past incidents."

I managed a small smile as I lifted the fork again. "Oh, yeah, that."

Sweetie Belle giggled.

Mom tilted her head. "Dear, are you all right?"

I idly pushed around bits of fruit on my plate. It took me a moment to realize Mom was talking to me. "Huh?"

"You seem a bit distracted this morning."

"Oh." I speared a piece of fruit with the fork. "Yeah, I guess. I'm anxious to talk to Doctor Whooves to find out if anything happened that night."

"Is he finally back in town today?" Sweetie asked.

I put the piece of fruit in my mouth and gave it only a few perfunctory chews before swallowing. "I certainly hope so. I hadn't expected him to leave town with Roseluck to see her relatives."

Mom smiled. "Perhaps that's your answer."

I put down the fork with a clatter. "Then why don't I have a cutie mark to show for it? I'm not even quite sure what exactly the talent is or what it means."

"That, perhaps is why you don't have it yet," Mom suggested gently.

"It seems kinda obvious to me," said Sweetie Belle. "You help fix relationships."

"That's what I would tend to think as well," said Mom. "That it expresses itself through repaired clothing is more of a side-effect or metaphor. Much like how my talent is finding gems, but it often expresses itself by other means."

These were all things I had thought of as well. It should be that simple, but something was still missing. "Thanks," I murmured. I reluctantly picked up the fork again. "I guess I'll just have to keep--"

Mom suddenly gasped, her pupils shrinking slightly and her ears flattening as she flinched in her seat.

"Rarity! Your cutie mark!" Sweetie cried.

"Oh, dear," said Mom as she hopped off her chair. Her cutie mark glowed in the same pulsing rhythm I had seen that day I had made my promise about being more open to friendship after the mess with Chrysalis had been resolved.

"You're being summoned by the Map?" I asked.

"Apparently so!" Mom declared. "I must get to the castle at once! I'll be back as soon as know what's going on. Candy, Sweetie, please clean up after breakfast if you would, thank you!"

"Sure thing," I said as she galloped for the door.

Sweetie Belle sighed, her ears drooping. "So much for the Social this year."

"Oh, well, maybe it'll be just like with me, and it's right here in town," I said, though I wasn't really holding out a lot of hope; the last time, the Map sent Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash clear out of the country.

She pushed her plate aside and lay her head on her fore-legs. "I don't suppose you might go with me instead?"

"Sweetie, if you really have nopony else who can take you, I can do it."

She lifted her head. "You sure? I know you said you don't care for that sort of stuff."

I smiled. "Yeah, but Mom didn't want to do it that first time, and she wound up doing it anyway, right?"

"I know, but ... well, it's not going to be the last Social we'll ever have. I just want to make sure you have fun with it as well."

My smile widened. "Well, thank you, I appreciate that. Let's just see what happens." I slid out of the chair. "In the meantime, let's get the table cleared and the dishes cleaned up. Maybe you can come over with me later to see Doctor Whooves."

Sweetie Belle smiled and hopped off her chair. "I really hope this means you're going to get your cutie mark soon, Candy. I so want to be there when it happens."

I grinned as I levitated plates off the table. "So do I, Sweetie."

Sweetie Belle trotted alongside me, bringing the silverware. "Speaking of which, have you had any problems at school because you don't have a cutie mark?"

I managed not to roll my eyes as I remembered what Summer had told me about Stronghoof's "exotic" tastes. I was not about to try to explain that to a filly Sweetie's age. "Not really." Excluding that one incident, that was pretty much the truth. "Maybe a few odd looks, but nopony's ever said anything to me directly."

Sweetie Belle grinned. "Probably because they know you won't take that from them."

I started the water running in the sink. "Now where did you get that idea?" I said in a mostly bemused voice, but my lips twitched into a small smile.

"Friend of mine at school has an older sister going to Ponyville High," said Sweetie as she grabbed a dish towel. "She said you're getting pretty well-known for telling ponies exactly what you think but without being mean about it."

I gave her a nonplussed look as I added dish soap to the water. "Really?"

Sweetie giggled. "She also said ponies are wondering why you don't have more of a Manehattan accent, since it would just fit you perfectly."

I laughed. "Oh, are they now?"

Sweetie smiled as she plucked a dish from the soapy water and started cleaning it. "I really hope I can be that confident when I go to high school."

I blushed. "Well, thank you, but I don't know if I'd call it confidence. More like trying to stop things from going too fast."

Sweetie tilted her head. "What things?"

I smirked. "Dating, romance, boys."

She scrunched her muzzle. "Ugh. Girly-girl stuff."

"You know what?" I said as she passed the dish to me to rinse. "Maybe I like the occasional spa treatment now and then, but I'm not quite ready to be a, ah, full-on girly-girl yet, either."

Sweetie giggled. "Good. You had me worried for a while."

"I did?"

"Yeah. You've been hanging out with that boy Bright Flame."

I rolled my eyes. "Oh, now don't be like Sunny, please. She's a good friend, but she really is a little too boy-crazy sometimes."

Sweetie's pupils shrank as she caught what I had implied by my reply. "Hey, wait, I'm not boy-crazy!"

I grinned and leaned closer to her. "You suuuure?"

Her mouth dropped open. "Wh-what??"

I snorted and jabbed a fore-hoof at her. "Gotcha."

She rolled her eyes. "No fair teasing me like that!"

I giggled. "What are older sisters for?"

Sweetie slowly smiled and giggled as well.

"But, seriously, the only times Bright and I were together it was nothing more than lunch, and we were hitting the books the whole time. Arcane Theorems is proving a bit tough for me, and I'm one of three ponies he's helping tutor. At least one of the others is a filly, too."

"Yeah, but from the way my friend said Sunny talks about it, well, you know."

I groaned. "I know, I know."

I had wondered myself if hanging around Bright would spark anything, but so far, nothing. He was a great friend, and I admired his intellect, but more in the way I admired the same in Twilight. While I had no reason to rush myself, Sunny was insistent we made a "cute couple."

"At least your other filly friends don't go on and on about it," said Sweetie.

"Yeah, there is that." Breaking the ice with other ponies at that party had indeed helped me, but I had since sought out more ponies of my own gender. "Even they agreed that Sunny is a little, um, obsessed."

"Maybe they could talk to her about it."

I had considered that, and they had even offered, but I shook my head. "No, Sunny was my first real friend at school, and she still is. If it gets out of hoof, I'll talk to her myself."

I changed the topic to something more mundane as we finished up with the dishes. I had only just placed the dishtowel back on its holder when Mom burst into the boutique at near full gallop, taking the stairs at a pace she would normally criticize Sweetie or myself for if we dared do it. "Sweetie! Candy! I have good news!" Her gaze fell on Sweetie Belle. "Oh, and, um ... some bad news, I suppose, as well."

"I knew it," Sweetie said in a resigned voice.

I turned towards Mom. "You're going out of town again, I take it?"

She practically beamed. "Yes, I am! And you'll never guess where Applejack and I are going!"

"Applejack was summoned?" said Sweetie. "Okay, now I don't feel quite as bad if Apple Bloom is going to have to sit it out, too."

I turned to her. "Well, I said I would go with you if--"

Mom uttered a joyous squeal. "Applejack and I are going to Manehattan!"

My mouth dropped open, and I simply froze.

Sweetie leaned close to me and whispered, "I don't think you're going with me."

"But, I ... she ..." I sputtered.

"Oh, this is simply fabulous!" said Mom as she trotted around the room. "And we're being summoned to the fashion district, of all places! Perhaps I can impress upon Applejack to expand her horizons with regards to her ensemble while we're there."

My heart raced. Manehattan was the closest I could ever get to seeing my old home again. If only this had happened before school started. If only I didn't feel obligated to take Mom's place at the Social.

If only ...

Sweetie Belle poked me gently. I looked down; she smiled and gestured with a fore-hoof. "Go on," she whispered. "Ask her."

"But what about the Social?" I asked in a quavering voice.

Sweetie shook her head. "It's okay, really. Go ahead."

I smiled my immense appreciation at her and turned just as Mom approached me. "Now, Candy, I need to make haste and get packed as soon as I can, and I--"

"Can you take me with you?" I blurted. "Please?"

Mom sighed, her ears drooping. "Candy, you have school on Monday, and--"

"But this is Saturday!"

"We have no idea how long this will take. It could very well carry us into the week."

I rubbed a hoof through my mane. "Then I miss a day or two of school, big deal."

"But it's important you keep up with--"

"I am keeping up with it!" I cried.

"But I've heard you say your Arcane Theorems class is--"

"And this is important to me. I have to know if it's anything like where I grew up back on my world."

Mom normally hated it when I interrupted her constantly, but now she simply gave me a forlorn look. "And if it takes us more than a day or two?"

I sighed. "Then stick me on a train back home. I just want to visit for a little while. I just want to see it."

Mom stepped closer. "Why are you so insistent on this, dear? I know you've told me before how you miss living in the city, but why now?"

"Honestly? I don't know," I said. "I just feel this pull. I've felt it for a little while now. It was always there from the start, but a lot of that was just getting used to living in a small town. This feels different somehow. Even Sweetie Belle will tell you I've been talking about it a lot with her."

Mom turned her head towards Sweetie, who immediately said, "She's right, Rarity. I think you should take her. I can sit out the Social this year."

"Are you absolutely sure, Sweetie Belle?"

Sweetie smiled and nodded. "Yep, I'm sure. This means a lot to Candy."

Mom turned back to me and slowly smiled. "All right, you can come with us."

I gave my own little squeal and hugged her tightly. "Thank you! Thank you so much!"

"But pack right now and hurry!" said Mom as she broke off the embrace. "We want to catch as early a train as possible, and the next one leaves in twenty minutes. Go!"

Still smiling, I nodded and rushed off.

"All aboard!!"

Mom trotted out ahead of us onto the train platform. "Oh, thank Celestia, we made it just in time!"

Applejack raised an eyebrow, a large trunk balanced on her barrel as she eyed us. "We woulda been here sooner if y'all hadn't wanted ta take everythin' but the kitchen sink."

"Hey, don't look at me," I said, my saddlebags filled to almost bursting. "Most of this is hers."

"Y'know, Rarity, we coulda done without half of this stuff," said Applejack as we stepped on board the train.

Mom made a dismissive noise and waved a fore-hoof as she picked out our seats. "One does not travel to such a place as Manehattan without a proper set of body and hair products to keep one looking their best at all times. Surely you packed something of the sort?"

"Nope. Ain't takin' nothin' more than my toothbrush and my hat. Figger the hotel can provide whatever else I need."

Mom sighed. "Please, do tell me you're kidding, that you wouldn't seriously trust the generic brand names you find at ... actually, strike that, don't tell me. The less I know, the less I'll worry."

I hid a grin behind my hoof as Applejack smirked and winked at me.

I slipped off the saddlebags and stowed them away with some help from Applejack before settling into my seat. I couldn't stop smiling. I never thought I would ever get this chance. My stomach did flutter a bit as I faced the prospect that it would not live up to my expectations. For now, though, the excited anticipation was enough to sustain me.

As I glanced out the window, I realized that this would be the first time I had left Ponyville since coming to Equestria. It brought back the fond memory of vacations with my birth mother. The exact destination in those days never mattered to me, just the fact that I was going somewhere. The travel itself felt more exciting than anything we might do once we got there.

And then there was the anticipation of seeing the familiar again on the return trip.

The whistle blew, and the train lurched forward, a head of steam rising from the engine and billowing overhead. I turned to the others. "So either of you know what this is going to be about?"

"Not a whit," said Applejack. "Jus' the general location in Manehattan."

"What, seriously? The garment district back in my world's version of that city was a sizable bit of real estate."

"That, unfortunately, appears to be how the Cutie Map works sometimes, dear," said Mom. "Your case was a bit more straightforward."

Applejack grinned. "Heh, well, findin' her was, but the rest? Not so much."

I rolled my eyes. "Oh, thanks," I said in mock indignation.

We all laughed, and it very nearly drowned out a sudden, distant call: "Miss Swirl! Miss Swirl, wait!!"

I turned my head towards the window. "What the ...?!"

Mom and Applejack leaned forward. "Oh, dear, is that Doctor Whooves?" said Mom.

"Um, yeah, it is," I said, mystified.

The familiar brown stallion galloped on the platform alongside the train as it picked up speed, a wide smile stretched across his muzzle. Beside him was Roseluck with just as happy a look on her face.

Applejack smiled. "An' his little marefriend. Gotta admit, they make a cute couple."

Mom chuckled. "They do, don't they? Roseluck is probably the best thing that happened to that somewhat eccentric stallion."

"But why is he ..." I began, trailing off. I sighed and opened the window, the rush of air blowing my mane into immediate disarray. "Doctor, what is it?!" I shouted above the din of chugging engine and rolling wheels.

"I just had to tell you something!" the Doctor said as he started to fall behind when the train picked up speed.

"I did want to talk to you, but I can't right now!" I shouted back.

"I figured it out!" the Doctor cried. "It worked!"

"Huh? What worked?"

"The magic! It was all so simple! It--"

My ears flattened as they rang with the sound of the train whistle as it drowned out the rest of his words. The two ponies skidded to a stop at the end of the platform and soon disappeared from view around the bend of the the train as it went around a curve.

"Close the window, please, before it disturbs your mane even more," said Mom.

I slid the window closed, though most of the damage had been done anyway, and I brushed frizzled hair from my eyes with a hoof.

Mom sighed. "Well, getting your coiffure into proper shape I suppose is one way to pass the time."

"What in tarnation was that all about?" Applejack asked.

Mom smiled. "I might know, but I'll let Candy take it from here."

I blushed. "Er ... well ... I don't know anymore now myself."

"Come again, sugarcube?" Applejack asked.

"Well, I think my talent might be related to fixing relationships, and it has something to do with clothing."

"I'm not sure I follow."

I threw up my fore-hooves. "Join the club. It seems to let me mend damaged clothing perfectly, but it's somehow tied to fixing a relationship."

"I believe the clothing is more symbolic than anything else," Mom said. "Due to your seamstress skills."

Applejack smiled. "Well, now I unnerstand. That sounds like a mighty nice callin'."

"But it's not." I slapped a fore-hoof against my still blank flank. "At least not yet."

"When we get back from Manehattan, I'm sure we can straighten it all out," said Mom.

I looked back out the window again as the outskirts of Ponyville slid from sight, and I sighed softly as twinges of doubt fluttered about in my stomach. Should I have stayed in Ponyville and figured out what was going on with me rather than go on this lark?

Perhaps I would have them stick me on a train back home tomorrow after all. I would have my fill of the city, satisfy my dumb urge, and get back to what I really needed to focus on.

Immense edifices of steel and glass thrust up into a clear blue sky, the bright sun casting long shadows even at midday. How am I here already? Where's Mom? Where's Applejack?

No, there are cars here. Ponies don't have cars. There are HUMANS here. I look down and find I'm a human as well. This is New York City, but what am I doing here? Do I even want to be here anymore? This place is too dangerous! The drug lords will be after me for sure, and ...

... no, wait. This is my old neighborhood.

People rush by, going about their business. Cars roar past on the wide avenue. I can't help but smile. I recognize this street. I walked it countless times between our first tiny apartment -- before she made it big and we moved to the upper west side -- and my mother's bou ... my birth mother's clothing store, the first one she ever opened.

I utter a happy giggle and break into a run, skillfully dodging around the thicket of humanity that moves at its own varying pace and pays little heed to a giddy little girl who wants to see her mother after coming home from school.

I act as if the years have not passed. I may as well be that bubbly little girl, years before everything started to collapse. There is even a bit of a skip in my step as her store appears ahead in a brief gap in the early rush hour tide. I think nothing of the absence of my escort -- my indifferent aunt -- who would normally hold my hand and guide me along. I don't need her, as nothing can hurt me here. Not today.

I burst into the store with an enthusiasm that often annoyed my aunt but found delight in my mother, my hair swinging wildly behind me. I keep it long, as Mom loves to style it for me, and I enjoy those long moments with her. Hopefully she'll do it tonight after work. Yet no sooner than I am inside when I skid to a stop within an empty and utterly still store.

I look around in confusion as I brush strands of hair from my face. "Mom?" I call out in a wary voice as my gaze slowly tracks over the sample dresses sitting on mannequins or dangling from hangers, to the completed orders wrapped delicately in thin white paper behind the counter, to the gilded doors of the fitting rooms.

A lump forms in my throat, but I ignore it and step forward. "Mom? You in the back?"

Silence.

I whip my head around. People pass by outside as if the store doesn't exist, ignoring the beautiful clothing sitting in lovingly arranged splendor in the window. I frown and rush around the end of the counter and into the back.

I am at once assaulted by the rich odor of fresh fabrics and dyes. Scraps of cloth and bits of thread littering the floor whirl about as my passing disturbs them. Half-finished dresses and suits lay across tables. Several appear fed halfway into sewing machines. Rank after rank of mannequins, more than could ever possibly have fit in Mom's old store, sit in silently damning array, every last one covered with an incomplete order.

"Mom?" I call out in dismay as I wander about the mannequins. "How ... h-how did you get so far behind?! This is terrible! Do you need help?"

Help?

Why did I ask that? I'm just a little girl. I don't have her skill. I never even showed an interest.

My heart pounds. I am lost in the forest of mannequins. I can't find my way back. I try not to panic as I keep calling for Mom over and over in an increasingly frantic voice. I am finally brought up short when I come to a clearing of sorts. I blink rapidly as I recognize the battered old desk. It is the first desk my mother used for doing paperwork related to the store.

Upon it sits an envelope, sealed with a sticker shaped like a red heart.

I approach the desk cautiously, and my hand trembles as it reaches for the envelope. I turn it over, and my heart lurches. It says simply "To Rachel" in my mother's lovely, flowing script.

I tear the envelope open and tug the elegantly decorated paper within into the light. I open the letter and swallow hard as I read my mother's words:

I have so much to do.
Each creation can be a dream come true.
Then torn asunder 'til threads lay in tatters.
As if none of my effort really matters.

I can fix things, but only so far.
And in the end, it still looks marred.
Like the hearts I wish I could renew.
I have so much to do.

I simply stare at the words, dumbfounded. What do they mean? I start to turn the letter over, not expecting anything. I flinch and gasp as the previously blank side now is filled with more eloquently written words:

So much I wished I had done.
And now, I understand, there are truly none.
None who have the time to do their part.
None who have the talent to mend a heart.

So many stories remain unheard.
So many hearts remain sundered.
I wished I could have fixed just one.
So much I wished I had done.

"I-I don't understand," I sputter. "I ... wh-what??"

I nearly drop the letter in shock as I look around me. All the dresses and suits are torn and ripped, sometimes to complete shreds. Have they been that way all along and I simply missed it?

I let the hand still holding the letter drop to my side as I am drawn to the nearest of the devastated clothing. My free hand rises, trembling slightly, and alights on the fabric. I stand there for a long moment, as if expecting something to happen. When it does not, I draw back, confused. I feel compelled to look at the letter again.

The words I have just read on the back are gone. I flip it to the front, and new words greet me:

Listen to your heart, Rachel, and don't doubt where it leads you.

I stare at them, some tiny glimmer of understanding struggling to be seen through the miasma of conflicting feelings. I raise a hand to my chest as if to touch my own heart and coax it into revealing what it has to tell me. "I-I'm trying, I r-really am," I say in a plaintive voice as I look up. "All I want is to know what I'm supposed to be--" I gasp as I step forward and catch movement. "MOM!"

I barrel through the mannequins, knocking many of them over. I pant as I race forward towards where I am sure I have seen someone moving. Yet as I arrive, I stop dead and simply stare at a very strange sight.

I stand before what looks like a mirror, but the visage that greets me is nothing like my own reflection. I see a little unicorn, standing no taller than four feet, with oddly lurid colors and huge, expressive eyes staring at me with equal amounts confusion and wonder.

The creature finally smiles and raises a fore-hoof. She places it against the glass, where it ripples upon contact. I step forward, pause, and place my hand to the glass, gasping as it ripples on my side as well, yet the glass remains a barrier. The unicorn seems sad at this, and her eyes shift to the letter still in my other hand. I raise it to my eyes:

And your heart is where acceptance truly lies.

"But, I-I ..." I stutter. "What does this ..."

As I raise my gaze back to the unicorn, she again smiles as if in reassurance and slowly retreats.

"Wait!" I call out, but a fog has already settled over the mirror, the creature vanishing softly within.

Suddenly, a gentle voice echoes, "Candy, dear."

I stumble back, the letter falling from my hands as the fog spreads from the mirror to the room, enveloping me in swirling gray and white as the strange voice sounds again.

"Dear, you need to--"

"--wake up, we're just about there."

"Huh? What?" I muttered in a groggy voice as I blinked rapidly at the afternoon light streaming into the car. I yawned and stretched stiff limbs as I glanced over to Mom and Applejack. "Did I fall asleep?"

"Quite so," said Mom in amusement.

"Ya were out like a light, sugarcube," said Applejack with a grin.

I rubbed my head with a fore-hoof. "Ugh, I almost never do that on a train."

"Are you all right, dear?" said Mom.

I nodded. "Yeah, I'm fine. Had a kinda weird dream, but ..." I turned my head towards the window and uttered a soft gasp. "Oh, wow, we are here!"

Mom chuckled. "While I normally would have let you get your beauty sleep, I was sure you didn't want to miss this."

I practically plastered my muzzle to the window. The train was making a wide, sweeping turn from south to the east, and the city opened up before me. I tilted my head as I tried to take in what I was seeing, and soon I let out a soft, long breath as my heart ached.

I knew not to expect a skyline like that of modern New York City, but what my eyes beheld seemed so perfectly adapted to the Equestrian mindset that it might as well be New York as seen through a pony lens. The essence of my former home lay here in all sorts of small ways that together comprised a whole which was both startlingly new and achingly familiar. Even the general shape of the city, with a central island of concentrated urban living surrounded by less crowded areas, was so similar that I wondered if I could walk its streets and never get lost.

Applejack leaned over towards the window. "Huh. Never did unnerstand how ponies can live in such a huge place."

I almost laughed. The one difference I could plainly see was that Manehattan did not sprawl anywhere near over the area covered by New York City. It was a city made by ponies for ponies, and not just a human-to-pony translation despite the name. Perhaps that had tempered my excitement a bit, for Mom laid a hoof on my shoulder and asked, "What do you think?"

"I'm ..." I began, but no other words came to me. The first tugs at my heartstrings had subsided. As the city loomed closer, I could see more differences than similarities. Whether that was true or just my mind trying to entertain a worst case scenario, I wasn't sure.

"It's okay, dear," Mom said softly. "If you need more time to form an impression, that's fine."

I turned my head from the window as the train slowed. "Yeah, I kinda do."

"If you wish to trail behind us a bit to just take in the sights, please feel free."

Applejack frowned. "Ain't that gonna be a little dangerous, havin' her hang back like that?"

Mom rolled her eyes. "Oh, Applejack, surely you don't buy into those stories of lawlessness and whatnot in the big cities?"

"Course I don't! Remember, I got relatives in the city myself. I jus' know ponies ain't as friendly in these here places. I don't wanna see her hurt."

I snorted. "Um, Applejack? I grew up in a city like this. I think I can handle ponies being a little less friendly."

Applejack slowly smiled. "Yeah, sometimes I ferget ya were actually raised in a place like this."

Mom smiled. "Really, darling, has it ever occurred to you that perhaps that's part of the friendship problem we've been summoned here to solve?"

"Ya may be right 'bout that, but this is a mighty big place. Hope we can figger it out."

I glanced out the window again as the shadows of buildings passed over the car, my mind turning towards the odd visions in my dream. I suddenly felt like I had something to figure out as well.

Jump to top

Chapter 54 - A Taste Of Home

I took my first breath of Manehattan air as we stepped off the train and into the equivalent of Penn Station, and at once I noticed the sharp difference. Instead of the familiar odors of diesel fumes and ozone, I instead smelled the thick aroma of steam and the occasional whiff of something acrid, like burning wood but not quite. I felt more like I had stepped into a version of New York City dating back perhaps a century or so ago, but, of course, with ponies.

What had not changed were the crowds. Far more ponies than I had ever seen clustered at the marketplace in Ponyville bustled about, those with a definite destination in mind mixed with gawping tourists. A smile stretched across my muzzle; now it started to look a lot more like home.

"Tar-nation!" Applejack proclaimed, her pupils shrinking slightly. "Where'd all these ponies come from?"

I giggled into my fore-hoof.

"And this is a weekend, darling," said Mom. "Imagine what it's like during a weekday."

"If it's all the same ta you, I reckon I won't." She glanced around nervously. "Can we get outta here? I wanna get ta where it don't feel so dang crowded."

Mom and I exchanged a look that said "shall I tell her?" but we both simply smiled. "We should get moving in any case," said Mom as she trotted forward.

Applejack fell into step alongside her, and I drifted in the rear, my gaze flicking about, finding both the familiar, the strange, and everything in between.

Applejack's gaze shifted from platform to platform, where ponies poured out of trains arriving from other cities, or darted into outbound trains. "Ya sure there ain't some sorta event goin' on?"

"Whatever do you mean?" said Mom.

Applejack gestured with a hoof. "All these ponies jus' buzzin' about like swarms of bees. Ain't no way there can be that many with a place ta go every day."

Mom chuckled. "Really, we need to get you off that farm more often and into the real world."

Applejack frowned. "The 'real world' seems a might too fast fer my tastes."

I had to stifle a laugh. At the same time, the ease at which I had again become used to the crowds and bustle of a big city did create a tiny ache in my heart. Was that all it took to spark a bit of homesickness?

Mom suddenly stopped and turned towards us. "Wait! My mane!"

Applejack raised an eyebrow. "What's the matter with it?"

"The steam from the train always sends it into quite the disarray. I need to touch it up before we head outside."

"Oh, fer the luvva ..." Applejack grumbled. "Ya were jus' all hot and bothered ta get outside!"

Mom trotted up to me. "Now, this will only take a second, all I need is--" She glanced at my saddlebags and suddenly gasped, drawing back a half step. "Oh, my stars, where is it?!"

I blinked. "Huh?"

"What now?" Applejack said with a resigned sigh.

Mom's horn glowed as she ruffled through my saddlebags. "One of my brushes is missing. We absolutely cannot be without it! It must have fallen out when we were leaving the train. We'll need to go back and find it."

I stared. "You're kidding, right?"

"I most certainly am not."

"Mom, you packed twenty-eight brushes!"

"Yes, but this one had beautiful sapphires embedded in the handle--"

I narrowed my eyes. "Like four other brushes you have."

"--and lovely emerald sequins around the edge--"

"Like another six."

Mom frowned. "Oh, do stop being contrary, Candy, this is quite serious."

I rolled my eyes. "Okay, fine, I'll go back and see if I can find it." I started to turn away. "Just don't go too far from the station."

Mom smiled and plucked a substitute brush from my saddlebags. "Thank you, dear, and I promise we won't stray too far."

Applejack gave me a sympathetic look just before they headed away.

I found my way back to the platform easily, but the conductor -- an earth pony stallion with a gray coat and white mane -- was drawing the gate closed. I galloped up to him. "Hey, wait!"

The conductor turned towards me. "What can I do for ya, miss?"

I pointed a hoof at the train. "I dropped something. Can you let me back on?"

The stallion shook his head. "Sorry, train's bein' taken outta service. They did a sweep for stuff left behind. Youse gotta go to the lost 'n found." He jabbed a hoof to the side. "Straight that way."

I grinned. Wow, that accent. Another dose of familiarity among the strangeness. I thanked him and cantered off.

The lost and found was run by bored clerks who looked like they wanted to be doing anything else but this. I had to describe the brush three times before the clerk finally found it. In an impatient rush, I grabbed it in my magic, mumbled thanks, and started off.

I had taken only a few steps when I skidded to a stop and muttered, "Wait a minute." I turned the brush over. While the handle and sides looked right, the tines were longer and spaced very differently than I had remembered. "Oh, ponyfeathers, this isn't right, this--"

"Excuse me, miss?"

I turned at the sound of a female voice. An older pegasus mare with a creamy light orange coat, yellow mane and tail, and a cutie mark of a sun half-hidden behind a rose stepped over to me, balancing a brush on a fore-hoof. My eyes widened. "Wait, that looks like ..."

The mare smiled. "Yes, I thought so. And you have mine."

I had been right; the brush the clerk gave me was meant for preening feathers rather than brushing hair. I exchanged brushes with her. "Thank you!"

"No problem, dear," said the mare as she deposited her brush in her saddlebag. "Just glad I caught you before you galloped off."

I thrust Mom's brush into the saddlebag so it would hopefully stay put this time. "Oh, um, yeah, sorry."

She tilted her head. "Are you from Manehattan?"

I could have asked the same of her, as her accent was faint. Even mine was stronger than hers. I decided to just go with it and not launch into a detailed explanation of my origins to a stranger. "Yeah, I am. First time back in a little while, though."

The mare smiled, though it seemed a bit forced. "Same for me as well," she said in a wistful voice. "Maybe too long a while in my case, but ..." She averted her eyes for a moment, then looked back to me with concern. "Pardon me for asking, miss, but are your parents about?"

"Yeah, my Mom's just outside the station."

She smiled more naturally. "Oh, good. Sorry, once a mother, always a mother, I guess."

I smiled as well. "No, it's fine. Um, speaking of Mom, I should join her outside."

"I'm headed out as well." said the mare. "Mind if I accompany you?"

I shrugged. "Sure, why not?"

The mare trotted alongside me. "My name is Rose Sunshine, but you can just call me Rosey. Everypony does."

"I'm Candy Swirl." I was at a loss as to what to say next. Engaging in conversation with a complete stranger in a big city was something I would expect in Ponyville, not Manehattan.

Fortunately, my companion felt compelled to break the silence. "I wonder how much has changed since I've been gone." Rosey chuckled nervously. "I hope I don't get lost."

"When were you in Manehattan last?"

Rosey hesitated. "Oh, um ... nine years. Almost ten."

That explained the faded accent. While growing up in New York, I noticed that very little really seemed to change about the city, at least at its very core. Businesses would come and go, buildings change hands, but the spirit of the place never changed. I gave her what I hoped was a reassuring smile. "Eh, the more things change, the more they stay the same."

Rosey's smile turned wistful again. "Yes, that ... that is quite true in many ways. I like to think that it's not always true, but ..." She trailed off and chuckled. "Pay me no mind, Candy, I'm an old mare prone to rambling sometimes."

Had I accidentally struck some kind of chord with her without realizing it? I remembered how easily Mom could do that with me back when my head was still addled with grief and guilt.

Only once she brought up the subject of age did I note she seemed a little older than I had assumed. Her wavy mane hair was streaked with a bit of gray. One of her wings didn't lay quite flat against her side.

"So what brings you to Manehattan again, if I may ask?" said Rosey.

I chuckled. "Um, heh, kinda hard to explain, really."

"I'm terribly sorry," said Rosey. "I didn't mean to pry."

"Oh, no, not at all, it's not like it's a big secret." Just how much was known about what Mom and her friends did outside of Ponyville? "You, uh, ever hear of something called a Cutie Map?"

Rosey gave me a puzzled look and shook her head.

"What about the Castle of Friendship?"

Rosey slowly smiled. "Yes, of course, I've heard of that."

"Well, okay, there's this magical device in the castle called a Cutie Map. Twi ... um, Princess Twilight uses it to send her friends to other parts of the world to, uh, solve friendship problems."

Rosey gave me an astonished look. "Really? That's quite remarkable."

"And my Mom and her friend were summoned to Manehattan," I explained. "I'm just sort of along for the ride."

Rosey uttered a weak laugh. "I don't suppose these ponies are for hire, are they?"

"I, uh, don't think it works quite that way."

Rosey laughed some more and waved a wing. "Just a joke, dear. And we're just about outside, anyway."

I had not realized that we were that close to the exit, but now the doors loomed just ahead. My heart raced in anticipation, and I squinted as the light of day blazed down upon us as we stepped through the door.

My breath caught as my eyes fell upon the busy avenue, and for a moment I was carried back to my childhood, as if reliving the snippet of my past that had played out in my dream on the train. Despite the "cars" being pulled by ponies and the colorful pony population themselves, the relentless activity preserved the essence of what being in a city like this was all about.

I took a deep breath, and as in the station, some of the illusion was shattered. Automobile exhaust was not the healthiest thing to breathe, of course, but its distinctive odor was something that harkened back to home, just like the rumbling of the subway beneath my feet, or the blare of horns from impatient drivers at intersections.

Manehattan had its own distinctive flavor for a city, and it would take me time to assimilate it all. Already the pounding of pony hooves that pulled the vehicles in no less of a mad rush than the cars of back home shouted I was someplace very different than the serene quiet of Ponyville.

Rosey smiled as she stepped in front of me, looking around. "You're right, Candy," she said in a soft voice almost drowned out by the police-pony's whistle as he stopped traffic to allow ponies on hooves to cross. "The city never really changes, does it?"

"Yeah," I said in a soft voice.

Rosey turned her gaze to me. "Do you see your mother?"

I shielded my eyes with a hoof. I spotted them across the street near the intersection. Mom looked like she had stopped somepony from buying a hat from a street vendor, and now she was levitating one from the luggage atop Applejack's barrel.

I pointed. "Over there. The unicorn with the white coat and purple mane. Her name's Rarity."

As I watched, the pony sporting the new hat trotted away, looking quite pleased, while Mom and Applejack appeared to discuss something.

Rosey tilted her head. "Are they doing their, um, friendship-solving thing now?"

Mom glanced at her cutie mark in obvious disappointment, just before the vendor approached them and tried to start an argument. "Probably not," I murmured as the vendor shook a fore-hoof in anger at them. I frowned as Applejack pushed Mom away from the altercation. "I better see what's up."

"I understand." Rosey raised a fore-hoof. "It was nice to meet you, Candy."

I gave her a small smile and touched my fore-hoof to hers. "Yeah, same here. See ya."

I glanced at the street where the police-pony was about to let traffic resume and did as any good New Yorker would do when faced with a light at an intersection with a flashing "DON'T WALK" sign: run as fast as I could before the other cars started to move. Or in this case, take off at full gallop just as the whistle blew. As I had hoped, it earned me no more than a roll of the police-pony's eyes.

I rounded the corner, heading across another intersection as I cantered after Mom and Applejack. "You're right, Applejack," I heard Mom say as I closed the distance. "The search continues!"

"B'fore we start any searchin', we outta circle back and fetch Candy," said Applejack.

"You don't have to," I said as I stepped alongside them. "And what was going on back there?"

Mom smiled as she glanced at the brush in my saddlebags. "You found it! Wonderful!"

Applejack rolled her eyes. "Yeah, wouldn't want another 'crime of fashion', now, would we?"

"Huh?" I said.

Mom lifted her muzzle. "Never you mind that. Let's check into the hotel and get back out there and find that friendship problem!"

"You mean you haven't figured it out yet?"

"Candy, dear, things like this take time."

"In other words, you don't have a clue."

"I reckon that sums it up, yeah," said Applejack.

Mom made a dismissive noise. "Now, enough of this negativity, both of you. I have an idea that just might work!"

Mom spoke only to Applejack about her idea, claiming she wanted it to be a surprise. Yet as I saw her idea take shape at the corner of a small lot squeezed between narrow, tightly packed brick buildings, I could only look on in confusion at what she and Applejack were constructing.

"There," said Applejack as she stepped back.

Mom turned to me and smiled. "So what do you think?"

I stared. It looked ... vaguely familiar. A simple wooden counter sat on the ground, and above that, supported by a vertical beam on either side, a wooden placard with two pony heads painted on with a heart between them.

"Well?" Mom prompted.

"Um ... what is it?" I asked.

"Why, a friendship help stand, of course!"

I blinked. No. She didn't.

Mom smiled and stepped up to me. "Don't you see your own inspiration in this?"

"I ... what??"

"Toldya this was a silly idea," Applejack muttered.

"Okay, explain this to me, please," I said. "How am I to blame for this?"

Mom gave me a confused look. "Don't you recognize it? You originated the concept."

I stared, dumbfounded. "I did??"

"Yes, you told me of that character from a work of literature back on your world. Well, in her case, it was psychiatric help, which I thought rather odd for a child to dispense, but--"

I face-hoofed so hard I nearly gave myself a headache. "Mom, that was a cartoon character! It wasn't meant to be taken seriously!"

Mom paused. She looked at her creation again. "Oh."

I rolled my eyes.

"Well, I say we make the best of it," said Mom as she trotted behind the stand. "Applejack, if you would?"

"Uh-uh, no way," said Applejack.

Mom pouted. "Oh, come on!"

"I ain't gonna sit there an' try ta offer friendship advice like I was handin' out free samples of somethin'." She jabbed a hoof down the street. "In fact, I'm jus' gonna go down that there street an' ask random ponies 'til I find somethin', an' I'll bet I'll have a better chance'n you."

Mom snorted and waved a hoof as Applejack headed away. "Candy, do you want to help me, or will you abandon your poor mother in her time of need?"

I smirked. "Nice try."

She sighed. "Worth a shot."

"I do want to help, but right now, I'm really thirsty," I said. "I didn't think to get some water while we were at the hotel."

Mom gazed past me and across the street. "There's a little cafe right over there. You can go have a soda or lemonade if you want." She levitated her bit purse from her mane.

I grabbed the purse in my magic and tucked it my own mane. "Thanks."

I trotted across the street and tried not to cringe when Mom's cry of "Friendship advice!" rose above the din of ponies and carriages.

Opening the door of the cafe brought a low cacophony to my swiveling ears, and a smile tugged at my lips. A multitude of ponies sat at tables, their constant chatter a busy and familiar drone. The clink and clatter of cutlery and dishes sounded from the kitchen. It all reminded me of what my birth mother called "greasy spoon" restaurants that were so ubiquitous back home.

As I stepped up to the counter, the aroma of frying hayburgers made my stomach rumble, tempting me to indulge despite how close it grew to dinner time. I had to have something, as just a soda wouldn't satisfy me now. Suddenly, I picked up another smell, one that made me gasp and forget everything else.

Bagels.

Sweet Celestia, Manehattan had bagels!

No way was I passing this up. To me, New York bagels were simply the best bar none. I purchased one of those wonderful baked and toasted concoctions along with a strawberry soda.

After finally hunting down a free table, I took a sample nibble of the bagel and let out a sigh of both relief and contentment. It tasted just as good as I remembered them back home. There were subtle differences in the flavor, or course, but it was good. That's all that mattered.

As I slathered butter on it, I glanced out the window, the noise of conversation thankfully drowning out Mom hawking friendship help to the apparently indifferent Manehattenites.

"She knows what she's doing," I murmured with a sigh. "I have to believe that."

"Heya," a female voice called out just as I bit down on the bagel.

I turned my head. An earth pony mare with deep amber fur and soft orange mane streaked with pale red stood in the aisle. On a fore-hoof, she balanced a tray with a large sandwich and a steaming cup of tea.

"Mind if I sit with you?" said the mare with a tired smile. "Every table's taken and my hooves are killin' me."

I still had the bagel in my mouth. I bit off a piece and chewed it quickly until I could respond. "Sure, go ahead."

Her smile widened. "Thanks, 'preciate it." She put the tray on the table and hopped onto the seat. I caught a glimpse of her cutie mark: a quill poised to write onto a blank scroll. "I've been trottin' all over this part of town all day. First chance I had to get something to eat since this mornin'. By the way, name's Digger Flower, but you can call me Digs."

I puzzled over her name. The combination didn't make immediate sense. "I'm Candy Swirl."

She raised a fore-hoof, and when I did the same, she rapped hers against mine rather hard. "Pleasedtameecha," she said before taking a huge bite out of her sandwich. She tilted her head, still chewing. "You from outta town?"

I blinked. "It's that obvious?"

Digs shrugged. "Sorry. Reporter's instinct. You got the accent, but not too strong, and your mannerisms are a little different."

"Your accent isn't quite that strong, either," I countered, though it was thicker than mine.

She grinned. "Good catch. Yeah, I kind of made my voice a little more refined. Makes interviewing ponies easier. Makes them think I got an air of authority or some such thing."

So now her first name made a little more sense. A play on digging for the truth, maybe? In either case, I wasn't letting anything distract me from the wonderful taste sensation that was the bagel. I continued to nibble it as we conversed. "Yeah, I'm just visiting."

Digs raised an eyebrow slightly. "By yourself?"

"No, my Mom is ..." I started to raise a fore-hoof, intending to point towards Mom outside, but at the last second I just waved it vaguely in the air. "... around."

Digs seemed to accept this with a nod, but as she picked up her cup of tea, her gaze wandered outside. "Huh. What's that all about?"

I coughed as I almost inhaled some of my soda. "Er ... I, um ..."

Digs leaned over and pressed one ear to the window. "Friendship advice?" She uttered an amused snort. "Okay, there's somethin' you don't see every day." She chuckled. "Wonder how much she's chargin' for it? Do I get a money-back guarantee?"

I tried not to shrink back in my seat as I asked in a small voice, "Are you going to report on it?"

Digs waved a fore-hoof. "Nah. Sounds like a fluff piece. I'm more an investigative reporter. I'll just tell them about it when I get back to the news room, and they can decide to send out a junior reporter if they want."

With any luck, Mom would be done by then. Or more likely, call it a loss; Mom had stopped hawking and had leaned forward with her head on her fore-legs, looking frustrated and despondent as Applejack trotted up to her.

Digs took a large drink of her tea. "Even if I wanted to cover it, I'm trying to wrap up early today. Got stuff to do for a special occasion."

Having successfully deflected attention away from Mom, I was more than happy to pursue this topic. "What's the occasion?"

She smiled, and her voice softened. "My tenth wedding anniversary."

"Oh, congratulations, then."

"Thanks. Been lookin' forward to this for some time. I've been wanting to plan something nice for my hubby for a long while. Going to surprise him with a setup just like our wedding day."

Her smile faded a bit. I found I couldn't ignore it. I glanced out the window again in time to see Mom get smacked in the face with a piece of paper blown by the wind, but even that didn't distract me. I turned my gaze back to Digs. "Something wrong?"

Digs hesitated, one corner of her mouth curling upwards. "Sure you're not lookin' to break into investigative journalism yourself?"

I smiled faintly. "Not really, but thanks. Anyway ... you don't have to answer that."

Digs shrugged. "Eh, no biggie, really. Let's just say the original wedding itself had a few, ah, technical difficulties. My hubby claims he doesn't care, but, well, I kinda do. So think of this as take two. I just want it to be perfect, you know?"

I paused to finish off the rest of my bagel and take a long drink of the soda. "Yeah, I get that."

I really did. My birth mother could be that way. When she held birthday parties for me, she insisted everything be just right. She even sometimes surprised me with a "do-over" party on the rare occasions when things didn't go well the first time.

Outside, Mom had done an emotional one-eighty; she had an absolutely joyous look on her face as she showed the paper to Applejack. It looked like a flier of some sort.

"You know that friendship advice pony, doncha?"

I snapped my gaze back to Digs. "Um ... uh ..."

She smirked and propped up her head on one fore-hoof. "That's your Mom out there, right?"

"Yeah, actually, she is," I said in a sheepish voice.

Digs chuckled. "Sorry, it was kinda obvious."

I rubbed a hoof through my mane. "It's kind of a long story why she's doing that."

Digs smiled. "No worries." She crammed the rest of the sandwich into her mouth and swallowed it after just a few chews. "Looks like they're coming to fetch you, and I gotta get going if I want to get my latest story in for tomorrow morning's paper and run my errands."

Sure enough, Mom and Applejack were heading across the street towards the cafe, Mom still levitating the flier before her.

Digs glanced at the clock above the counter and frowned. "It's later than I thought. I'm gonna have to put off going to my seamstress until tomorrow." She rolled her eyes. "Not that it's gonna help, but I'll have to give it a shot." She smiled and downed the last of her tea in one gulp. "Nice meeting you, Candy."

I smiled. "Yeah, same here."

Digs grabbed her tray, winked, and slid off her chair just as Mom and Applejack burst inside.

"Candy!" Mom cried as she rushed up to me. Applejack fell behind, having as much luck navigating the crowded cafe as she had crossing the street outside the station earlier (from the way Mom had told it). "Candy, I have wonderful news! Look!"

Before I could open my mouth to comment, she thrust the flier at me. I quickly scanned it as I drank down the last of my soda. "Um, okay, so?"

Mom made an exasperated noise. "Can't you see this is it?"

I raised an eyebrow. "This is your friendship problem? A community theater revival?"

"Excuse me ... pardon me ... sorry ..." came Applejack's voice as she struggled to reach us. She finally stood next to Mom and frowned. "Consarn it, there's jus' too many ponies no matter where ya go!"

"Candy, don't you recognize the name?" Mom implored.

I admittedly had skimmed the flier rather than read it in depth, but now my gaze was drawn to a familiar name. "Coco Pommel? Is that pony you told me about from your last trip to Manehattan?"

"Yes, exactly! She's running the revival and must desperately need our help."

I set the empty glass of soda aside. "Are we heading over to Coco's place now, or will you have mercy on us and let us get some dinner first?"

Mom waved a hoof. "It's not that late."

"Yer dang right it's that late," Applejack declared. "Y'all could hear my stomach rumblin' if it weren't fer all the noise in here."

Mom sighed. "Oh, very well."

Applejack sniffed the air. "I'd even go fer the grub in this place if I could put up with the crowd."

"Nonsense, darling," Mom said. "I know of a much more upscale place than this."

Applejack raised an eyebrow. "Is it gonna be some frou-frou place where the servers are dressed better'n the customers an' ya need a magnifyin' glass ta see the portions?"

I smirked and nearly chuckled.

Mom clicked her tongue. "Ugh, you really need to understand what it's like to be in a city like this. Let's get going."

The sun sank below the skyline as we walked down the street from the restaurant some time later. "Yeah, I knew it was gonna be like that," Applejack muttered.

"The portions were not that small," Mom countered.

"Then why am I still hungry?"

Mom turned to me. "Are you still hungry, Candy?"

"Not really," I said. "But I had the bagel in the cafe right before dinner."

Mom gave me a nonplussed look. "A bagel?"

"Um, yeah. Something wrong with that?"

"Well, not really, I just thought while you were in Manehattan you would sample cuisine that was less, ah, low-brow."

I uttered a dramatic gasp. "Low-brow??"

Applejack snickered.

"Well, I only meant--" Mom began.

I waved her silent with a fore-hoof. "Nope. That's it. You insulted my love for bagels. I'm disowning you as my mother."

Her pupils shrank. "I beg your pardon?!"

Applejack laughed, and I smiled and giggled.

One corner of Mom's mouth rose. "Very funny."

I was still smiling as my gaze wandered about just to take in everything. A sense of almost giddy excitement had settled over me, and I wasn't sure why. Could just walking down a city street really bring me all the way back to those happy days as a kid? Was I looking at things too much through rose-colored glasses and not truly seeing the differences between this place and my old home?

"That the place yonder?" I heard Applejack say.

I turned and looked where she had pointed her hoof, and my breath caught. A tiny clothing store occupied a corner of an otherwise nondescript apartment building. In my wistful gaze, it briefly became one of the first stores my mother had opened.

"Oh, good, she's still open," said Mom as she quickened her pace.

My heart raced. I couldn't shake the feeling that I was about to take a step into the past. Yet as the little bell above the door tinkled, and we filed inside, I let out the breath I only realized then I had been holding. In my mind's eye, I became the little girl in the dream, delighting in the anticipation of seeing her mother doing what she loved so much. Only when my overlaid memory had faded enough could I see the differences between this and the store in my head, but nothing could change the essence of this place.

Movement out of the corner of my eye interrupted my thoughts, and had it not been for the distinct clop of approaching hooves, I would almost have expected to see my birth mother walk out from the back. Instead, an earth pony mare with an off-white coat and two-tone pale blue mane and tail came trotting out. "I'm sorry, I was just about to close up for the day and--" the mare began before coming to a sudden surprised halt. "Ohmigosh! Rarity?!"

Mom approached her and extended a fore-leg. "Come here, darling."

The mare rushed forward, accepting the offered hug. "Oh, and Applejack!" she cried, hugging her as well. "It's so good to see you, too!"

"Same here, sugarcube," said Applejack with a smile.

The mare turned her gaze to me. "And who would this be?"

"This is my foster daughter Candy Swirl," said Mom. "Candy, this is my good friend Coco Pommel."

"Nice to meet you," I said.

"This is such a wonderful surprise!" said Coco. "What brings you all here?"

Mom's horn glowed, and she plucked the flier from her mane and unrolled it. "I would say this did."

Coco gasped. "I've been so frazzled about this the past few weeks! A-are you really here to help me?"

"We're going to do all we can, dear."

"But right now, ya might wanna explain more of what this is all about," said Applejack.

"Yes, of course," said Coco. She trotted to the front door and latched it, then flipped the sign in the window from "OPEN" to "CLOSED" before turning to face us again. "Let's all head up to my apartment. I have some snacks that you're more than welcome to."

Applejack brightened. "Well, thank ye kindly, that would sure hit the spot right now."

Coco started towards the back. "This way, please, there's a door in the back that heads into the apartment building."

"Um, wait," I heard myself say. "Coco?"

She stopped and turned. "Yes, Candy?"

I hesitated, my eyes darting around the store. "This ... this is going to sound like a strange request, but ... can I hang out down here for a bit and just, well, look over the place? Please?"

Coco gave me a confused look. "Oh, well, I guess that would be okay, um ..."

Mom stepped up to her friend. "It'll be fine, dear." She turned her gaze to me. "Is it okay if I mention ...?"

I nodded quickly, not trusting my voice.

"Candy's original mother, may she rest in peace, was an excellent dress maker and fashion designer in Manehattan."

"Oh, I didn't know," said Coco softly. "I'm sorry to hear she's gone."

Applejack turned to me. "Guess I shoulda figgered this here place might bring back some memories."

"Yeah, it does," I said, my eyes misting. "Good ones, though. She had a store that looked a little like this one."

"Of course you can stay down here, Candy," said Coco. "My apartment is 3B if you want to join us later."

Mom placed a hoof on my shoulder. "Will you be okay?"

I smiled and nodded. "Yeah, I'm good. Really, I am."

Mom gave me a quick hug before heading off with the others. I waited until I heard the back door close in their wake.

I took a deep breath and trotted through the store. My heart ached at the aroma of fabric and the sight of half-finished orders. A desk lay facing a wall, papers lying neatly inside bins. The place was not arranged quite as my birth mother's store had been, but the differences simply didn't matter. A place like this had once been home. I had spent more time with her here than I had ever spent with her in the apartment. In a way, I missed this when she made it big and no longer had to work directly in her stores anymore.

Not many years after that, her downward spiral began.

I shook my head violently. I refused to taint these good memories anymore with such morbid thoughts. Instead, I envisioned my birth mother sitting at the desk, toiling away at the books while I played nearby. God, she so loved what she did; no wonder I had bonded with Rarity so closely that I could call her mother as well.

My birth mother also loved New York from the very moment she moved us here. She loved the sights, the sounds, the never ending activity, and the people. Especially the people. I supposed that sounded weird, considering the reputation New Yorkers had, maybe unfairly, for being cold and harsh.

Or maybe she simply wanted to change that.

I closed my eyes, and the imagery from my dream came back to me. The words of that letter remained etched into my mind. Were they really her words? Or did I just invent them myself?

I opened my eyes and stared at the desk again. "I have so much to do," I said in a very soft voice as I echoed the opening line of the letter. I let my gaze drift across the unfinished dresses. "Each creation can be a dream come true. Then t-torn asunder 'til threads ..."

My voice caught. I forced myself to take a deep breath. I so wished I could speak with Princess Luna about that dream.

The sound of the back door opening broke me out of my reverie. I turned as the others entered the room. "Something wrong?"

Mom smiled, but I could see the concern in her eyes. "I could ask you the same thing."

I blinked. "What, you're done already?"

"Ya stayed down here a might longer than I think ya realized," said Applejack.

I rubbed a hoof through my mane. "Yeah, I guess I did. So what's the deal with the revival?"

"We'll talk about it on the way back to the hotel, dear," said Mom.

"Speakin' of which, we better get goin'," said Applejack. "We gotta be back bright an' early if we're gonna round up other ponies ta help with this here shindig."

"And I can catch up with those costume alterations," said Coco. "At least I hope I can."

I turned my head towards her. "Wait, did you say alterations? Can I help?"

"Oh, but I couldn't ask you to--"

"You don't have to, I'm offering!"

Mom smiled. "Coco, I can personally vouch for her skill. With her helping you, you'll get those costumes done for 'My Fair Filly' in no time."

Coco smiled. "Thank you so very much."

Now, at least, I had something to do the next day. Maybe spending more time in this store would help me figure out what my dream meant, if anything.

Jump to top

Chapter 55 - Hearts Sundered

I wolfed down the last of my bagel just before entering Coco's shop the next morning, the coffee I had purchased along with it still steaming. I took a small sip as the bell above the door rang in my wake. "Coco? You here?"

Coco smiled as she trotted from the back. "Good morning, Candy. Where's Rarity and Applejack?"

I waved a fore-hoof towards the door. "They're hitting the streets trying to round up ponies to help with the revival."

Her smile widened. "Oh, very good. I've already gotten started on the costume alterations for 'My Fair Filly.' You want to head on back with me?"

I nodded and glanced at the window as I took another sip of coffee. She had the "OPEN" sign out. "You're still going to be doing business today?"

"I have to," said Coco. "While the shop is fairly successful, the costumes for the revival are going to set me back a bit. I have to keep up with expenses."

"I can help with tending to customers, if you want."

Coco tilted her head. "You can?"

I smiled. "Mom has me do that at the boutique. I'm sure I can handle it here, too."

"Thank you so much!" Coco gushed. "That will really help. Come on, let's get started."

I trotted into the back with her and quickly fell into a natural rhythm similar to what I did at the boutique. Coco had different approaches to fashion than Mom did, but it didn't take me very long to adapt. The work evoked a strange mix of emotions in me. Doing this in a place so reminiscent of one of my mother's first stores felt both exciting and surreal.

We traded the job of waiting on customers between us, depending on who happened to be more free at that moment. I occasionally got so involved in my work that I had to use the reheat spell twice on my coffee. I had just finished some particularly tricky stitching when the bell above the front door rang.

"Can you get that one, Candy?" Coco said as she fed fabric carefully through a sewing machine. "This is going to take me a while."

I slurped down the last of my coffee and tossed the container into a wastebasket. "On it," I said as I cantered towards the front. I paused to get the words straight in my head, so used to as I was to those I spoke when greeting customers at the boutique. "Welcome to Coco's Sensible Fashions, how may I ... oh!"

I stopped short as a familiar grin met me. "Well, small world, isn't it?" said Digs as she leaned one fore-leg on the counter, a billowy white dress draped over her barrel.

"Um, yes, I suppose it is," I said with a small smile as I stepped forward.

"Sooo, you came all the way back to Manehattan just to work in a clothing shop?"

"Well, not really." I hesitated in a moment of mental debate. "Okay, well, long story short, my mother and her friend are here to help Coco with some community theater revival, and I'm helping Coco catch up on her work."

Digs jabbed a hoof in the air towards me. "Oh, yeah, I know whatcha talkin' about now. Huh, thought that would fall by the wayside since the pony runnin' it left town."

"Coco's trying to pick it up herself."

Digs nodded once. "More power to her, then. It's not a small task."

I rubbed a hoof through my mane. "Yeah, she kinda found that out the hard way."

Digs glanced at the dress on her barrel. "So, is Coco still taking in business today, or should I scram?"

"Depends on what you need," I said. "If it's alterations, I can do that for you."

Digs considered. "Well ... it's kinda more than that. You wanna take a peek?"

"Sure." I carefully levitated the wedding dress to the counter, mindful of what Mom told me about using magic to handle delicate fabric. The dress was indeed very light, and very well made, an antique white with brighter lace accents and a lovely, hoof-stitched pattern of flowing curls. I slowly turned it over and spread it out. "So what do you need done with ..."

I trailed off as my gaze fell on an ugly, ragged gash in the side of the dress, easily nearly as long as my fore-leg. I tried not to cringe at the very inexpert stitch that had been added to prevent more threads from unraveling. Digs must have caught something in my body language, as she sighed and nodded. "I know, I know, I totally suck at sewing, but I wasn't quite thinking straight at the time."

I smiled gently. "It's fine. What happened to it?"

"Eh, not really important. I was hoping maybe Coco could, well, repair it somehow."

My heart skipped a beat. "You want this patched?"

"Yeah," said Digs. "I mean, as best as can be done."

I stared at the tear. The fabric was slightly translucent and very thin. I recognized it at once, as my skill at patch work demanded it. Unfortunately, it had been discontinued four years ago. "I'll do the best I can."

Digs raised an eyebrow and smirked. "You?"

I blushed slightly, realizing what I had said. "Um, I mean ... if Coco is okay with that. If you're okay with that. I can't promise magic, but--"

The bell tinkled as another customer entered the store. I intended only to take a glance, but my gaze lingered when I beheld another familiar face as Rosey trotted forward, a floral-print dress draped over her barrel.

"Heh, so you're good at this sort of thing?" Digs said.

Rosey froze in mid-step, one fore-hoof raised, her pupils shrinking.

Digs gave me a curious look, then turned her head towards where I was staring. A moment of uneasy silence descended over the room along with a tension so palpable it seemed to electrify the air. Digs finally turned herself fully towards Rosey and thundered, "What in Tartarus are you doing here?!"

I just stared as Rosey's gaze flicked from me back to Digs. Rosey swallowed and slowly lowered her hoof with a faint clop. She took a deep breath. "Daisy, please, I--"

Digs stomped a fore-hoof so hard the floor shook. "Don't call me that! Don't ever call me that! In fact, why are you even talking to me at all?!"

A frown flickered across Rosey's face, but she banished it quickly. Nevertheless, her voice held a slight edge as she spoke. "It's been almost ten years, don't you think we should let--?"

"Meaning it hasn't been long enough!" Digs roared.

My heart ached as I saw the mix of anger and deep hurt flicker across Rosey's face. I recognized that look all too well. I saw in the mirror quite a bit for years. "I didn't want to meet you again this way," said Rosey.

Digs recoiled. "This way?? Just what were you planning, huh? You don't just pop back into town for no reason. You never do anything without a reason."

Rosey frowned. "Well, if you must know, maybe I simply wanted to ... to see how my daughter was doing after all this time."

Rosey was Digs' mother? I supposed that if an earth pony like Mrs. Cake could give birth to a unicorn and a pegasus, then the opposite could happen, too.

"That's a lie," Digs growled. "But I've come to expect that from you."

Should I try to defuse this? The more I listened, the more I sympathized, even though I didn't know anywhere near the whole story. I hated the idea of letting them go at each other, but I had little choice. I could read Rosey's emotions a bit, but Digs simply bristled with so much anger I could tell very little about what she was feeling beyond that.

Digs stepped towards her mother. "I'll tell you why you're here. You want to ruin my do-over of the wedding just like you ruined the first one!"

"Dai ... Digger, no, I wasn't going to do that!" Rosey snapped.

"Stop lying! You do so intend to go!"

"Yes, I do, but not to ruin it!" Rosey yelled. She took a breath and forced her voice lower. "I had planned to slip in unnoticed, just hover near the back and ... and talk to you only afterward." Her eyes glistened. "Digger ... I'm not the same mare I once was."

Digs snorted. "Yeah, you got that right. You stopped being a mother a long time ago."

I flinched, and Rosey could only stare helplessly at her daughter.

Digs turned towards me. "Candy, please do what you can in patching this dress, and for the love of Luna, keep this bitch away from it."

My mouth dropped open. I had since learned that that particular curse word, one of the few that had a translation into Equestrian, was considered extremely vulgar. Mom had all but forbidden me from using it.

Digs looked at me with an expression where anger now became infused with a chaotic mix of hurt and pleading, as if she were silently begging me to understand her reaction. She narrowed her eyes and hardened her face before turning around and stomping for the exit. Rosey's wings fluttered as she scrambled out of the way. Her right wing -- the one that didn't lay quite as flat -- moved more sluggishly than the other.

Rosey watched her go, then turned her misting eyes towards me.

I struggled to find any words that would suit. "Um ... I ... I'm really sorry about that."

I knew the words were trite, and Rosey sighed. "No, I ... maybe I deserved that. It's not important."

I levitated the wedding dress to the side. "Is there something I can help you with?"

Her eyes flicked over to the dress. "Maybe if you could make my daughter's dress whole again, she won't hate me so much."

"Um ..."

She shook her head. "Strike that. Even that wouldn't ... well, I guess it doesn't matter anymore. Sorry to bother you."

Rosey started to turn. "No, Rosey, wait!" I heard myself cry.

She paused and turned her head towards me.

"Did ... did you want something done with your dress?"

"I did, but now ..."

"Let me alter it for you," I said. "Please."

She turned fully towards me. "Why? What's the point?"

I didn't have an answer. All I had was a vague instinct, a desire, an urge. "Just in case?" I offered, despite how lame it sounded even to my ears.

Rosey hesitated before trotting forward. "All right. I haven't worn it in ages. It needs to be adjusted for my right wing ..."

I took her measurements largely in silence. Her right wing was indeed rather stiff, and it sat wrong against her body compared to what I had seen in other pegasi. The alterations would be fairly easy to do. "I can do this by tomorrow."

She smiled faintly. "Thank you, Candy, you're very kind." She paused. "Could somepony deliver the dress to me at my hotel? I don't want to risk running into Daisy ... I mean Digger again."

"I'll see what I can do."

Rosey nodded. "Thank you. Nice to meet you again, Candy."

"Same here."

She gave me a melancholy smile before heading out of the shop. I heard Coco come up from behind me. "Candy, is everything okay? I thought I heard Digs yelling out here."

"Uh, yeah." I levitated the wedding dress. "She wants this repaired."

Coco's pupils shrank. "I'm not sure I can!"

"I'm going to try it, if you're okay with that. I have some skill with this sort of thing."

Coco slowly smiled. "You're welcome to try, then. But who was Digs yelling at? Not you, I hope."

"No. Her mother."

Coco gasped and raised a fore-hoof to her muzzle. "Her mother is in town? Oh, dear."

I sighed as I set the dress down. "Yeah, that's the size of it."

Coco glanced at the door. "Um, Candy, I hate to ask this, but ... when Rosey was here, did she seem ... okay to you?"

I tilted my head. "Okay? Well, one of her wings looked a little crooked."

"I don't mean that. Did she seem coherent?"

I blinked. "Well, yeah, she did."

"Are you sure she wasn't, um, how should I put this, under the influence?"

My ears drew back. "You mean like she was drunk?"

"That, or anything else."

"No, not that I could see."

Coco sighed. "Good."

I frowned. "Coco, what's going on here? Why does Digs hate her mother so much?"

Coco shook her head. "I only know a little of the story, and I'm not sure how much Digs would want me to say. I've sort of said a bit too much as it is. I hope you can understand."

"Yeah, I do," I said with a sigh.

But that didn't mean I wasn't going to try to find out.

I levitated yet another bolt of fabric onto the work table and unwrapped enough material to compare it to the wedding dress, only to frown when I discovered yet again it didn't precisely match. In this case, the consistency and weave were correct, but the color was far too off base; the bolt was bright white when I needed more of an antique white.

I set it aside and levitated two other bolts I had checked earlier. Both were almost the exact color, but one was too thick and the other had sparkly bits woven into it. I clicked my tongue in a manner that I often heard Mom do and dropped both bolts back to the table. "This is hopeless," I muttered.

I turned to the ponyquin on which the wedding dress sat and sighed as I stared at the tear. I didn't look away even as I heard Coco trot into the room. "Any luck with the dress, Candy?"

"Yeah. All of it bad," I grumbled.

"Sorry to hear that." She stood alongside me. "But at least I managed to get the alterations done for 'My Fair Filly'."

My eyes widened as I turned to her. "You finished the ..." I lifted a hoof to my head. "Oh, ponyfeathers, how long have I been at this?"

Coco smiled faintly. "For about the last hour or so."

"Coco, I'm so sorry, I was supposed to be helping you with--"

"No, it's okay," Coco said. "You helped give me a head start earlier, and I appreciate you dealing with the customers and freeing up my time."

I managed a smile.

Coco's gaze shifted to the dress. "You've really taken on a challenge here. I'm honestly not sure this will work out."

"You and me both." My mind drifted back to the train platform in Ponyville, when Doctor Whooves had tried to tell me that the same magic had worked with his suit. Was that supposed to happen here, too? Should I just patch this dress without worrying about how perfect it came out and ... then what?

"Will you still be able to work on the alterations for Rosey's dress?" Coco asked.

"Yeah, no problem. Maybe I should just do that first since that won't take me long."

"Thanks, Candy." Coco sighed. "Now maybe I can get started on the costumes for the revival. I have no idea how I'm going to finish them on time. I really hope Rarity and Applejack find enough ponies for me to catch up."

I turned to another ponyquin and levitated Rosey's dress from it to the last empty spot on the work table. As I started to carefully remove an existing stitch without tearing the fabric, Coco stepped closer and smiled. "You really do fantastic work."

I blushed slightly. "Oh, um, thanks. I did like working with you earlier."

"We did make a good team, didn't we?"

"Yeah, I'm just sorry I can't help with the costume design," I said. "I'm just not quite that good at it yet."

It didn't seem like I was getting any better at it, either. I had not inherited that talent from my birth mother nor had it managed to rub off on me from Mom. I think Mom was waiting for the right moment to break it to me gently that original creations may be beyond my grasp.

Coco turned away. "That's okay. I'm going to get some work done on it and break for lunch up in my apartment. You're welcome to join me."

I considered as I continued to work on the stitch removal. "Actually, I think I want to work a little longer. I can just grab something from the hayburger place down the street if it gets late."

Coco smiled softly. "Just don't overwork yourself."

I grinned back at her. "Just worry about yourself. I'm fine. Oh, before you go, I meant to ask, how much do you want me to charge for the alteration?"

"Well, that's up to you."

"It is?"

She gestured towards the dress with a fore-hoof. "You're the one doing the alteration, so you should be paid for it. Same for the patch work on the wedding dress."

I sighed. "I didn't intend to steal business from you, Coco."

She chuckled. "I don't think of it that way. You all came all the way from Ponyville to help me. This is the least I can do. Please, don't worry about it."

"I'll try not to," I said with a small grin.

Coco smiled and headed out.

I went at the alterations with a single-minded determination, trying not to let my thoughts get clouded with the wedding dress. I worked through Coco leaving for lunch, which I noticed only when I heard the back door open and close. Not long afterward, the bell rang on the front door. I set down the needle I was just about to thread and headed to the front. "Oh, hey, Mom," I said when I saw her and Applejack. I took one look at their expressions and cast a wary gaze at them. "Um, dare I ask how it went?"

"It didn't," Mom declared with a despairing sigh.

"Not a single pony wants ta give us the dang time of day, let alone help with the revival," Applejack grumbled.

I had a bad feeling it might turn out that way, but I hadn't wanted to burst their bubble. I had hoped that perhaps a pony version of a big city might be a little different, but I supposed urban living just tended to be that way no matter what world it was. "So what now?"

"So now we break it to Coco," said Mom.

"That's fine an' dandy, but I ain't got no clue what to do next," Applejack said.

"Let's talk to her first before we assume the worst." Mom turned to me. "Dear, where's Coco?"

"She's up in her apartment," I said.

"Do you want to accompany us?"

"I'm working on an alteration. I want to finish that and then head out to grab some lunch." I paused. "I ... might want to deliver it, too."

Mom smiled. "I can tell there's a story behind that, but it will have to wait until later. Just do be careful and don't be too late getting back."

"I won't, I promise," I said.

Time crept by as I toiled on Rosey's dress, and the sudden appearance of both Coco and Mom in the back of the shop surprised me. "Still working on that, dear?" Mom asked with a gentle touch of her hoof to my shoulder.

"Yeah, but I'm almost finished," I said as my stomach rumbled.

"You always did underestimate how long alterations take for pegasi," said Mom. "And you skipped lunch, didn't you?"

I rolled my eyes. "Just delayed it, that's all." I glanced from her to Coco. "So what's up?"

Coco smiled. "Rarity is going to help me with the costumes for the revival."

"Meanwhile, Applejack will work on fixing up the park," said Mom.

"Er, the park?" I asked in confusion. "What park?"

"Why, the one across the street, of course."

I stared. "That's a park? I thought it was an abandoned junkyard."

"Ah, well," said Mom as Coco's smile faded a bit. "It has gone to seed a tad."

That was far more than a "tad," but I wisely said nothing. "Well, I'll get this alteration finished and be out of your way."

Mom nodded, and I held my breath as her gaze lingered on the wedding dress for a moment, the tear clearly visible. She simply smiled softly and headed off with Coco. Now my gaze rested on it as well, and emotions swirled in my head amongst the words of the first part of that letter from my dreams.

I can fix things only so far / And in the end, it still looks marred.

I frowned and tore my gaze from the dress. No, I had to take this one step at a time, even if I didn't quite know where those steps would take me. I finished the last stitch on Rosey's dress, boxed it carefully, donned my saddlebags, and headed out.

With the dress safely in its box, I felt safe enough in grabbing a hayburger first. The trip to the hotel was a bit of a hike, but I didn't care. It gave me the chance to take in the sights. Some of the initial shine had worn off, and I could more easily see the differences between Manehattan and the city that had truly been my home.

Yet I smiled anyway as I trotted along the city streets. No, this was not my former home, but I enjoyed it just the same. Perhaps some of my initial reaction had been tinted through the rose-colored lens of an imagined happier time as a kid, but I knew I needed to look past that. Perhaps now I saw myself as I might have been had things worked out better in my earlier life. I realized only then how much I had loved New York as a kid, almost as much as my birth mother had.

Once I reached the hotel, I realized I had no idea if Rosey would be there. When I told the front desk that I had a package for one of their guests, though, they simply waved me on through when I told them what it was. I stood outside her hotel room and rapped a fore-hoof on the door.

At first I heard no response and thought for sure she had stepped out. Just as I was about to turn away, the door unlatched and opened. "Candy?" Rosey asked in confusion. "Is something wrong?"

I hesitated when my gaze fell upon her. Her eyes were bloodshot, her mane was in disarray, and her feathers were ruffled. I remembered the odd question Coco had asked me, and I barely repressed a shudder as I was reminded of how terrible my birth mother looked right before the end. I said in a wary voice, "Maybe I should be asking that of you."

Rosey sighed but managed a weak smile. "Pay me no mind. What is it? Did something go wrong with the alteration?"

I managed a small smile. "Nope." I levitated the box out of my saddlebag. "I finished it."

Her pupils shrank slightly, which made their bloodshot nature painfully more apparent, and the memory all that much more vivid. "You're done already?"

"I, um, kinda put a rush on it," I said. "Like I said, just in case."

Rosey's smile widened slightly as she took the box under her left wing. "Thank you so much, Candy. What do I owe you?"

I waved a fore-hoof. "Don't worry about it. It's on the house."

"Oh, but I couldn't!"

"You don't have to, because I am."

Rosey's eyes misted. "You are so very generous."

I smiled. "I get it from my Mom."

"You mother must be very proud of you," said Rosey.

I blushed. "Well, I'd like to think so, but ..."

"And I have to admit, I have no idea how she manages to look so young after having raised a teenage daughter."

I rubbed a hoof through my mane. "Well, about that ... she's actually my foster mother."

Rosey tilted her head. "Oh, I didn't know."

I shrugged. "It's okay. My birth mother's been dead for a while now."

"I'm so sorry to hear that."

"Really, it's okay, I'm over it." I paused, my gaze flicking over her. "Well, mostly. The circumstances behind it sometimes bug me, but it's in the past."

"Circumstances?"

I hesitated. "Um ..."

Rosey shook her head. "Sorry, I don't know what possessed me to say that. Please, you don't have to answer."

And yet, I felt I needed to. "It's fine. It's just not the most cheerful subject. Without going into the gory details, she died of a drug overdose."

Rosey's mouth slowly dropped open. Her eyes watered until a few tears slid down her face.

I stared. "Um ... are you okay?"

Rosey swallowed hard. Her wings trembled, and the box fell to the floor.

My heart raced. Deeply buried memories disgorged themselves into my mental landscape. My birth mother, barely able to do anything without trembling or shaking, and ... "Rosey? Do you need me to get somepony?" I paused. "Do you need a doctor?"

Rosey shook her head, tears still flowing. "I made a terrible mistake in coming to Manehattan, th-that's all. I ..." She looked at the box on the floor. "Candy, please, even my good wing doesn't work as well since I can barely fly anymore. Could you ...?"

"Of course." I stepped over the threshold of the door as I levitated the box, even though I could have done it from the hallway. Rosey gestured with a fore-hoof towards the bureau. I stepped further inside as I set it down. My gaze tracked over the bed and the night table. Several wadded-up tissues lay on the latter, and more in the waste basket next to it. I felt guilty for thinking her state had been the result of something more sinister.

Not that the thought of her sitting up here crying her eyes out was pleasant, either.

Rosey closed the door and sank to her haunches as she turned to face me. "You must think me a stupid old mare," she muttered, her gaze downcast.

I hesitated in my response, but only because of the sheer hopelessness in her demeanor. "No, of course, I don't."

She swallowed hard and raised her head. "Candy, please, tell me the truth. What were you thinking when you first saw me come to the door?"

I sighed. "Does it really matter?"

"Yes, it does."

"Well, I thought you ... that maybe you were sick." What was I supposed to say? That she reminded me of my birth mother on drugs? Maybe my response wouldn't pass muster with Applejack, but Rosey's emotional state seemed too delicate for the truth right now. Besides, my thought stream had been triggered by a question from Coco rather than any serious suspicions on my part.

Rosey paused a long moment, then finally rose to her hooves. "I guess in a way, I once was. I hate to ask this, but do you really think you can do something with Digger's dress?"

"I don't know yet." I paused. "Why?"

She gave me a humorless smile. "You mean you haven't figured it out yet? I was the one who ripped it."

My ears drew back slightly. "On purpose?"

"No, by accident, but ... well, let's just say I wasn't myself at the time."

I glanced around the hotel room. If I knew one thing about addiction of any kind, people sometimes left telltale signs about if they didn't think anypony would be coming to call on them, such as an empty liquor bottle or drug paraphernalia. Admittedly, I had no idea what the latter might look like in Equestria. Twilight had once implied that drug addiction did happen here but was rare. I later read that Princess Celestia rigidly enforced laws concerning trafficking in such substances, and she apparently showed the traffickers themselves very little mercy.

The hotel room was pristine. If Rosey did have some sort of issue in the past, she was probably clean now. She showed no sign she was simply in withdrawal.

I turned to her. "What did it?"

Rosey stared. "What ... I don't understand."

"What happened that got you off whatever you were on?"

A frown flickered across her face, but it soon faded, and one corner of her mouth rose slightly. "You're quite the direct young lady, aren't you?"

"Yeah, pretty much. I've had experience with this, unfortunately."

Her half-smirk faded. She extended her bum wing. "This happened. Four years ago. I was trying to wrangle a rogue thunderstorm while working on the Baltimare weather team. I was blissed out of my skull. A wind shear I would've normally handled smashed me into the side of a building. I would've died if my teammates hadn't noticed my state and kept close tabs on me."

I bit my lip as I recalled the many times I thought I should somehow intervene with my birth mother and never did. "I'm sorry."

Rosey refolded her wing. "Don't be. It's my own fault. The wing actually would be usable if the accident hadn't torn the mana channels to shreds."

I winced. "But isn't that supposed to heal, too?"

"Not when your blood is saturated with baneful bliss."

My Arcane Theorems class had gone into detail about how pegasus magic worked. Wings alone were not enough; they actually channeled magic that helped them fly. All the stories of Tirek made a lot more sense after I had learned that.

And now I had a name for the drug: baneful bliss.

I fought to keep memory at bay. I didn't want to run the risk of projecting any lingering resentments over the past onto Rosey. She had managed to do what my birth mother couldn't. I had to give her credit for that. Yet I could also imagine the pain that Digs had gone through.

Rosey stepped up to me. "Candy, you really did think I was on something when you arrived, didn't you?"

I sighed and nodded. "Again, I'm sorry."

Rosey placed a fore-hoof on my shoulder, her eyes glistening. "No, it's fine. Did Digger tell you about me?"

"No, Coco mentioned it. I guess Digs mentioned it to her at some point. She wouldn't tell me much more than that." I tilted my head. "Wait. Does Digs know you're clean now?"

"No," Rosey said in a low voice. "I doubt she would believe me." She forced a small smile. "Thank you for working on my dress, even if I'm not going to get a chance to use it. And thank you for listening to me, but I'm sure you want to be on your way now, and I probably should get packed and get on the next train back to Baltimare."

Suddenly, the letter from my dream came to me again.

Like the hearts I wish I could renew / I have so much to do.

She turned away from me.

"Wait," I said.

Rosey hesitated, then turned her head towards me.

"I, um ... just don't give up hope yet, okay?" I said.

"But there's nothing you can do."

"Yes, there is!" I paused. "I'm going to fix your daughter's dress."

Rosey sighed. "I appreciate the sentiment, but I doubt even that--"

I stepped up to her. "Look, just trust me on this, please. Stay in town for now."

Rosey swallowed. "Do you know how hard it is to be near my ... b-but she ..." She took a deep breath and let it go. "All right, I'll try."

For once, I could say I had some idea what I was doing. I finally understood what had perplexed me before: I had assumed some force was supposed to push me forward, and things would just fall into place. I wasn't even approaching it anymore from the perspective of a special talent or a cutie mark. All I knew was what I wanted to do in the here and now and not what I thought was expected of me on some more grandiose scale.

The dream hadn't been my birth mother trying to contact me as maybe I would have liked, or forcing some fate or life path on me as I would have feared. Instead, it was my own head trying to sort itself out and using the one kind of imagery that was sure to grab my attention. Only once I had separated a pining for the past from a genuine allure of the present did I get it. I still didn't understand quite all the imagery, but I had a damn good start.

I smiled. "Thanks. I'll contact you again as soon as I can." I headed for the door but paused just short of it. "Rosey? Can I ask you one more thing?"

Rosey nodded once.

"Why did you call your daughter 'Daisy'?"

Rosey smiled faintly. "Because that was her original given name: Daisy Flower. My husband and I ..." Her smile faded slightly. "Ex-husband and I were surprised when I gave birth to an earth pony. She soon lived up to her name. Even as a foal, she had an amazing ability to grow flowers no matter how bad the soil or the weather. We thought for sure that she would get her cutie mark in that."

"But she didn't," I said.

Rosey's smile disappeared. "No, she didn't. She ... changed her interests at one point."

From the gravity of her tone, I could tell that was not the whole story by any means, but I doubted I would get any more from her. She wore the face of a pony too emotionally exhausted to divulge any more details.

Besides, now I had to get Digs' side of the story.

Jump to top

Chapter 56 - Hearts Renewed

"Now, Candy, are you absolutely sure you want to stay another day?" said Mom as we trotted over to Coco's shop the next morning.

I rolled my eyes. "Yes, Mom. Just like I was sure the last three times you asked me."

"I'm just concerned how much school you're going to miss. If you get on the morning train, you'll have time to make your afternoon classes."

"I know, but I promised Digs I'd repair her dress and, well ..."

Applejack grinned. "I think she's got more goin' on than jus' patchin' a dress if ya ask me."

"Yeah, that," I said.

Mom smiled. "I suppose you're right. I do wish you luck in your endeavor."

Applejack looked towards the park as we grew near. "I think I'm gonna need a bit of luck myself."

I gave her a sympathetic look. Whatever she had done in the park the day before, it had taken a toll even on her hat. Her poor stetson looked almost shredded.

"Really, darling, you ought to let me replace that hat," said Mom.

Applejack waved a hoof. "Don't worry 'bout that fer now." She took a deep breath. "Welp, better get back to it. See y'all later."

I watched Applejack head into the park before turning back to Mom. "Will you and Coco be able to get the costumes done?"

"We got a good start on it yesterday afternoon," said Mom. "We should have no trouble getting them done before the Method Mares show up for the dress rehearsal later."

As we approached Coco's shop, my gaze was drawn to a community theater flier attached to the wall. A corner had come loose and flapped in the breeze. I used the excuse of trying to tack it down to stop. "Hey, um, Mom, can I ask you something?"

"If you make it quick," said Mom.

I frowned as my attempt to fix the flier made more of the adhesive give way, making it hang even looser. "I wanted to know if you ever heard of something called baneful bliss?"

Mom gasped, her pupils shrinking to near pinpricks as she recoiled. "Candy!" she hissed. "Who ... d-did somepony offer you any?!"

"Huh? No! I -- hey!"

Her magical glow enveloped one of my forelegs and dragged me into the shadow of the building. "Candy, listen to me very carefully! If anypony even hinted that they had or could acquire any of that dreadful--"

I fell to my haunches and waved both forelegs. "Whoa, Mom, stop, chill out already! It's not like that!"

Mom sighed in exasperation. "Then why in Celestia's name did you even bring it up?"

I rose to my hooves. "Somepony had mentioned it to me, and, no, not to sell me any. It was something that happened in their past, that's all."

Mom relaxed slightly. "Well, all right. My apologies for overreacting."

"At least it answered my question about whether you had heard about it."

"I most certainly do not have personal experience with it."

"I didn't figure you did, but could you at least tell me what you know about it?"

Mom hesitated, glancing to the side for a moment and watching other ponies trot by. None appeared to care about our hushed conversation. "At its very essence, it's a flower."

That made sense. Many drugs back on Earth came from plants.

"It was once used in medicine," said Mom. "Mixed with other herbs, it can help alleviate pain for very bad injuries. By itself, though, it induces euphoria and can be very addicting. You need to stay away from it."

"Hey, realize who you're talking to," I said. "The pony whose original mother died from drugs."

Mom gave me a serious look. "Then you can't blame me for not wanting that fate to befall you. I was more concerned with somepony taking advantage of your ignorance of such things. I supposed I should have mentioned something about it, but we were in such a rush to get here--"

I shook my head. "Relax, it's okay. I have a little more street savvy than that, anyway."

Mom slowly smiled. "I sometimes forget you were raised in a place like this."

"So I take it the stuff is regulated?"

"Try banned," said Mom. "Since healers had found less troublesome substitutes, it's allowed to grow only in the wild."

I considered. "Doesn't it take some sort of processing before somepony can use it?"

"That's why the flower is so troublesome, dear. It can be grown and immediately consumed once it blossoms for the full effect."

"Huh. Yeah, I could see where that could be a problem."

Mom nodded. "If that's all you needed, and now that my heart has restarted properly ..."

I rolled my eyes but grinned.

"... we can head inside."

"Yeah, that's all I wanted to know," I said. "Thanks."

As we turned towards the store, a sudden gust of wind ripped the flier from the wall. Before I could snag it with my magic, it had vanished over the top of a nearby building.

I let out a relieved sigh as I set down the scissors and examined the patch material I had spent the last hour cutting with almost absurd precision. I glanced between it and the ponyquin, where the dress had been laboriously pinned so that the cloth around the torn area lay as it had been intended.

I turned fully towards the dress, gently applying the patch. The edges overlapped the torn area by the precise amount needed to secure it. I kept my eyes riveted to the dress as my magic floated a steady line of pins which inserted themselves at intervals to keep the patch in place.

I let my breath go as I took a step back. I had managed a better match than I had thought I might, but again, never as good as I want. To do anything more ... something else would have to happen.

"One step at a time," I whispered.

I was about to grab the needle and thread when the bell over the front door tinkled. I sighed and headed to the front. I didn't bother with the standard greeting when I saw who was standing at the counter.

"Heya, Candy," said Digs. "What's shakin'?"

I stepped up the counter. "I'm not quite done with your dress yet."

"Yeah, I figured," Digs said. "But I was in the neighborhood and thought I'd drop by. I, uh, kinda wanted to apologize for yesterday. I'm not usually that hot-headed."

"It's fine, I understand," I said in a soft voice.

"Also, um ..." She glanced out the window at the park, where I occasionally caught a glimpse of Applejack toiling away. "Maybe I don't like the idea that my mother is in town, but it did kinda remind me of this."

"It did?"

Digs smiled. "Yeah, I used to watch the theater every year. Seemed like it would just always be here, you know?" She paused. "You think Coco will pull off reviving it?"

I honestly had no idea. Applejack had been working all afternoon the day before and now a good chunk of the morning, and I saw very little difference. "Well, I hope so. I really--"

Before I could continue, Mom and Coco emerged from the back. A line of colorful costumes hung from a rack that glowed in Mom's magic. "We're done!" Mom proclaimed triumphantly.

"Oh, hello, Digs," said Coco with a soft smile.

"Heya, Coco." Digs' gaze flicked over the costumes. "Wow, these are gorgeous! They for the theater?"

"Yes, but I wouldn't have gotten them done without Rarity's help."

Digs grinned. "Heh, you know, I don't usually do pieces like this, but maybe I will do a write-up on it."

Coco blushed. "Thank you."

"Now, let's get going, darling, we don't have a moment to spare," said Mom.

Coco glanced at the clock. "Yes, the Method Mares will be here any minute."

"You got them back to do this?" said Digs. "Cool! Maybe I'll pop by and watch it myself."

Mom and Coco smiled before shepherding the costumes out of the shop.

Digs watched them go. When she turned back to me, her eyes were glistening.

"You okay?" I asked.

She chuckled. "Nothing gets past you, kid, does it? Just ... thinking. Like I said, hadn't been to see the community theater in a long while."

Something in the way she looked at me prompted my next question. "When was the last time you went?"

Digs' smile faded. "With my mother." She rolled her eyes and waved a fore-hoof. "Eh, never mind. Different time. Different ... Doesn't matter."

Except it did. Her eyes held the same look mine had so many times after my birth mother died, when I claimed it didn't matter to me anymore just to avoid anyone expressing undeserved sympathy. In reality, I just didn't want them triggering my own guilt.

"I spoke with your mother," I said.

A frown flickered across Digs' muzzle. "Oh, yeah?"

"She told me about the bliss."

Digs stiffened. "Huh." She paused a long moment. "Was she on it?"

"She's clean."

Digs snorted.

"She really is," I declared. "She's been so for a while."

Digs raised a dubious eyebrow. "You an expert on that?"

I hesitated. "Maybe not. Just ... my mother died from drugs."

Her ears flattened. She glanced out the window as Mom entered the park. "But I thought you said she was--?"

"She's my foster mother."

"I ... totally didn't pick up on that," Digs murmured. "Wonder why I missed that. I usually can tell that sort of thing." Her face hardened. "But maybe you can see where I'm comin' from."

I shuddered as I remembered all the resentment I had channeled into guilt. "Yeah, I can."

Digs considered. "Hey, uh, what made you go talk to her anyway?"

"I met her at the train station. She seemed like a nice pony."

Digs tilted her head. "The train station? What the hay was she doin' there?"

I raised an eyebrow. "What, seriously?"

"Yeah, seriously. She couldn't be taking a train."

"Why not?"

"She was a great weather flier back in the day in Manehattan before she left for Baltimare after the wedding. She flew everywhere, no matter how far."

I hesitated. "Um ..."

Digs narrowed her eyes. "What is it?"

"You ... you don't know about her accident?"

Her pupils shrunk, and she drew back a half step. "What?!"

"She had an accident. It ... she can't fly anymore."

Digs' lower lip quivered, and she swallowed hard. She averted her gaze and closed her eyes. "I bet ... I bet she was blissed out at the time, right?"

"Yes, but it was what got her off the--"

She whipped her head towards me, her eyes narrowed to slits. "Yeah, I thought so. It's not my ... it's her own fault, then! Maybe it's what she d-deserves for everything she--"

Her words were drowned out by a thunderous crash that rumbled through the floor and made the light fixtures swing. My ears flattened as I saw a plume of dust and debris rise from the park where I was sure a large structure had just been.

My blood ran cold. "Mom!" I screamed before galloping out the door. My panic was short-lived as I saw her standing just inside the entrance. She turned at my approach and met me as I hit the sidewalk. "Mom, you okay?!"

Mom gave me a brief but tight hug. "Candy, I'm fine. The, um, stage collapsed but nopony was hurt."

I glanced past her. Applejack stood on the other side of the wreckage, a harried looking mare near her. Another group stood off to the side, looking on with varying degrees of concern, disappointment, and disapproval. Coco sighed and hung her head as she stood next to the rack of costumes.

"I take it things are not going well," I said in a low voice.

Mom sighed. "Don't worry about it, Candy, we'll figure this out. I hope." She drew back from me. "I better go help Coco."

Digs trotted over as Mom headed back into the park. "Bad break for the theater, but I'm glad your mother's okay."

I took a deep breath. "I probably shouldn't have panicked like that, but when I heard the crash ..."

"Yeah, I know."

I turned to face her. "Digs, about what I told you concerning your mother--"

She frowned and raised a hoof. "Don't bother." She glanced into the park. "She probably made it up, anyway."

I stared. "Huh?? Why would she do that?"

"Look, all she she did for a long time was lie!" Digs thundered. "She lied every time somepony suspected something was up with her! She lied until my father left her! It wasn't until I investigated it myself that anypony found out what in Tartarus was going on." She narrowed her eyes. "Bet you anything she didn't tell you about her biggest lie of all. She lied to me, her little filly she so praised for my flower-growing talent, so I could grow the very same flower she blissed out on."

My stomach twisted. Was that what Rosey had alluded to when she mentioned how Digs' "interests" had changed? Having her own daughter grow that infernal flower was the equivalent of my birth mother sending me out to buy drugs. For all her faults, she had never done anything like that.

All I had to do was think of my own feelings immediately following her death to know just how easy I could believe Rosey had lied. And yet, I stomped a fore-hoof and said, "No."

Digs stared. "Huh?"

"I believe her," I declared. "She really had an accident, and it helped her get off the bliss."

Digs frowned. "Prove it."

"You're the investigative reporter," I snapped. "You prove it."

I cantered back to the shop, leaving a stunned Digs in my wake.

I heard Mom's hoof-steps behind me as I carefully applied another stitch to the dress but paid her no mind. Only when I heard something plop onto the worktable did I jab the needle safely into a pin cushion and turn around. I raised an eyebrow at the neatly folded brown paper bag. "What's this?"

"Lunch," said Mom.

I turned to the bag on the table and started to open it. "You didn't have to."

"Oh, yes, I did," she said in an admonishing voice. "You're going to get at least one healthy meal while we're here."

I rolled my eyes as I extracted a salad and an FLT (flower, lettuce, and tomato) sandwich from the bag. "Thanks."

Mom smiled and turned towards the ponyquin. "The dress appears to be coming along."

"Wish I could say the same for the ponies involved. I keep wondering if I was too hard on Digs."

"You were following your instincts, dear. Manehattanites sometimes require a, well, firmer hoof. You of all ponies should know that."

I took a large bite of the sandwich. "I keep thinking there's something else behind Digs' anger. I hope she's actually investigating whether her mother was telling the truth or not."

"I think you read her correctly, Candy. In fact, you seem to have an uncanny ability for that sort of thing now."

I hesitated calling it a possible talent. I didn't want to set myself up for disappointment if I failed. I wasn't even sure what I should do next. Go over to Rosey's hotel? At first I hadn't minded how far away it was, but I couldn't keep shuttling back and forth. I had to get them together somehow.

Maybe the community theater was the key? That sparked the question I had been dreading to ask. "So what's up with the theater now?"

To my relief, Mom smiled, if only faintly. "We're trying a new approach. We thought perhaps we had attempted too much. Applejack is now building a replacement stage, but vastly scaled down."

"How long is that going to take her?"

"She thinks she can be done before sundown."

So that's how long I had to figure this out. We would be heading home in the morning. Maybe inviting Rosey to the theater was the right thing to do, but I had to finish this dress first.

I sighed. "I better get back to this."

"All right, dear, but please don't neglect your lunch."

"I'll try not to, Mom."

Mom nodded and left.

I forced myself to at least finish the sandwich, and then just picked at the salad now and then as I returned my attention to the dress. I had only the final stitches to do. Objectively, it was as good as any skilled seamstress could produce, even if not as elegant as I would have liked.

Both Mom and Coco passed my little work area several times without disturbing me, though I did catch Mom giving me a slightly disapproving look when she saw I had finished only half the salad. Did Digs really just throw up her hooves? Was my feeling that she still cared for her mother just so much wishful thinking?

God, if my birth mother had turned herself around, I would've loved her even more than ever. Maybe that's what had frustrated me about Digs; at least her mother was still alive.

I applied the last of the stitches. My gaze roamed over my work, trying to find anything I could have done better. I levitated the dress carefully and turned it around. The patch was obvious, but it was better than the ugly tear that it had replaced.

The front bell tinkled. I glanced at the clock. Coco had said she wanted to do a dress rehearsal with the Method Mares in the afternoon in her apartment, so she was likely gone. I set the dress back on the ponyquin and headed to the front. I nearly did a double-take when I saw who was standing there. "Rosey??"

Rosey smiled softly. "Hello, Candy."

"Um, hi," I said, somewhat dumbfounded. "What are you doing here?"

Rosey manipulated something tucked under her left wing until she could place it on the counter. My mouth dropped open. It was not just a flier for the theater but the flier, the one that had come loose from the wall earlier. I recognized the dog-eared corner that had first come loose.

"Would you believe, this came sailing into my window in my hotel room?" She chuckled. "It just about hit me full in the face."

Had I somehow done that? I tried not to think on it too hard, other than maybe I did have the right idea in trying to get them together.

"It reminded me of one of the last things I did with Digger before the wedding." Rosey glanced at the nearly complete stage outside. "I wanted to recapture at least one happy memory."

"I talked to Digs earlier," I said in a tentative voice. "She said you had her grow the flower."

Rosey nodded solemnly. "I did. I'm not at all proud of that."

"Rosey, I have to ask, why did you go on the bliss?"

Rosey gave me a faint, humorless smile. "You really do go to the heart of the matter." She sighed. "Maybe I should know what else Digger said about me."

Should I tell her about the accusations? The bitterness? No, she likely would expect all that. "She said you were a great flier when you were on the Manehattan weather team."

Rosey shook her head. "No, I was the best flier. Even as I aged, I could still push myself to do amazing things. Then ... Digger came along."

I tilted my head. "You weren't expecting to have a foal?"

Rosey smiled. "Oh, no, Candy, I wanted a foal. If I could handle Manehattan weather, I could handle motherhood." Her smile faded. "What I hadn't expected was to have an earth pony. Don't get me wrong, I loved her dearly and still do, but raising her was more of a challenge than I had expected."

My heart lurched. "Did you get any help?"

Rosey gave me a sad look. "Why would I? I was the amazing Rose Sunshine! I could do anything. Raising an earth pony would be just another challenge."

"I think my birth mother was like that, too," I said in a hesitant voice. "Running her business became a huge strain, and she refused help. She had to do it all herself, and sh-she destroyed herself in the end."

Rosey swallowed. "And you don't h-hate her? You don't hate me?"

My ears drew back. "What? No, not at all!" I paused. "Well ... concerning my birth mother, I think it was more I didn't let myself hate her. I channeled it into guilt instead."

"I'm not sure I follow," said Rosey.

"We had made nice memories together before it all fell apart. I didn't want to ruin it with hate, but that emotion had to go somewhere, so I turned it into guilt over not intervening when I saw what was going on."

"I'm so sorry you went through that," Rosey said in a quavering voice. "Did Digger tell you how she finally found out?"

"She mentioned briefly about investigating it."

Rosey gave me a wry smile. "She's downplaying it. Even though she didn't get her cutie mark until a year later, she had pretty much earned it then." She sighed. "Though I only got better after that at hiding my--"

The door burst open with such force that the bell above the door tore off and was flung against the opposite wall, startling us both. I flinched as I saw Digs standing there, her hooves splayed as if in a combat stance.

"D-Digger?" Rosey said in a small voice. "Are you all right?"

Digs ground her teeth so hard I could hear them from across the room. She stomped up to her mother. "I came here to tell Candy what I had found out. I had to know if you had lied again!"

Rosey's pupils shrank. "Lied about what?"

"Your accident, that's what!" Digs bellowed.

Rosey glanced at me before saying, "It wasn't a lie, Digger."

"I know! I would've preferred it if you had lied!"

Rosey frowned. "Why? So you'd have another reason to hate me?"

"Why didn't you tell me about it?!"

"I didn't know if ... I wasn't sure you'd even care."

Digs hesitated, and in that brief moment, I saw something flicker across her face that I had not expected. She took a ragged breath, and her expression hardened again. Now I wasn't quite sure if I had actually seen it, at least not yet.

"And if you did care, I ... I didn't want to worry you," said Rosey.

"Worry me? Worry me?!" Digs cried.

"I pulled through," Rosey said in a helpless voice.

"You were in a coma for two months!" Digs yelled. "A unicorn healer had to restart your heart three times! YOU ALMOST DIED!!"

Good God. I had no idea her accident had been that bad. No, Rosey was not a liar, but she was damn good at withholding the truth.

Tears welled up in Digs' eyes. "Y-you don't know when to stop, do you?!"

Rosey stared nonplussed at her daughter.

"First you resented having an earth pony as a daughter--"

"Please, Digger, that was for a very brief time, and I--"

"And then you turn to the bliss, and when I couldn't stop you doing that, you go and do this to yourself! What more am I going to have to take on?!"

And then the last piece fell into place.

Rosey gave her daughter a genuine look of confusion. "I don't understand."

"I do," I said.

Digs whipped her head towards me. "Oh, and what is it you understand, kid, huh?"

I took a deep breath and tried to keep my own tears at bay. All I could see when I looked at Digs was the pain she had been carrying for so long. "You don't hate your mother."

Digs' recoiled, drawing back a half step, tensing as if ready to bolt. "Wh-what ... why wouldn't I, for all the things she did to me?!"

"When you investigated your mother and found the truth, did you do anything about it?"

Digs frowned. "I confronted her. Big time."

"Did it help?"

Digs' lower lip quivered. "She ... she said ... she wanted to stop."

"But she didn't," I said.

Digs swallowed hard. She shook her head, her eyes misting further.

I hated doing this to her, but I had to make her see the truth. I could only imagine what my life would've been like if I had carried around something like this for so much longer than I had. "It wasn't enough."

Tears splashed to the floor. Digs sank to her haunches. "It was n-never enough. I never could get her to s-stop."

Rosey gasped softly, and her eyes glistened. She had just figured it out.

"You don't hate your mother," I said. "You ... you hate yourself because you couldn't stop her."

Digs didn't respond. Her tears were my answer.

"Oh, dear Celestia," Rosey said. "I ... I never knew ..."

I took a step towards Digs. "When my mother died, I didn't want to hate her, so I turned hate into guilt. You did the opposite. You turned guilt into hate."

Digs sobbed once and lifted a shaky fore-hoof to her face to wipe away tears. That was why she wanted the accident to be a lie. In her mind, Rosey's accident was her fault because she had failed to stop her mother from doing bliss. All I had to do was think back to how I felt after Michelle's death to know how guilt can completely tear a heart to shreds.

Rosey advanced a half-step towards her daughter. "Digger," she said in a solemn voice. "I have no words that can express my sorrow. I caused you far more pain than I ever realized I had."

I could sense that all Rosey wanted to do was rush forward and comfort her daughter, yet the divide still remained.

"J-just tell me the truth," Digs said in a shaky voice. "You did resent me. You resented how much I s-slowed you down because I wasn't a pegasus."

Rosey lowered her gaze. "Yes," she said in a very soft voice. "But when I said it was brief, and I got over it, I meant it."

Digs lifted her head and turned towards her mother, still sniffling. "But wasn't that when you started doing bliss?"

Rosey shook her head. "I didn't start that until the pressure became too great. I was raising you and trying to keep my career going at the same pace as before, and I foolishly refused help from anypony."

Digs' pupils shrank. "But ... n-no, you're lying again!"

"Digs, please listen to her!" I declared. "She's not lying!"

"She has to be!" Digs cried. "She started the bliss to deal with her resentment over me! It's my -- I-I mean, if only I knew back then, I could've tried harder, I could've--"

"Digs, stop it!" I shouted, startling her. "Stop trying to justify your guilt! Get this through your thick skull: your mother's bliss addiction is NOT YOUR FAULT!"

Digs stared at me for a long moment before her lips curled into a faint smirk. "Wow. When you want to make a point, Candy, you don't hold back."

I shrugged. "I was raised in a big city. What do you expect?"

"Candy is right, Digger," said Rosey. "Nopony else is to blame for what I did. If you're going to hate me, then hate me, but don't destroy yourself in the process. You deserve so much better than that."

Digs shook her head and wiped her eyes. "I don't want to hate. I don't want the guilt. I mean, yeah, I'm mad as all Tartarus that you did this! I mean, what you were thinkin', huh?!"

"That's the problem," said Rosey. "I wasn't. Not clearly, anyway."

"Maybe ... maybe I once did have a real reason to hate you," Digs said in a low voice. She craned her neck and looked at her own flank. "I got my cutie mark after yet again investigating how you lied to me about going off the bliss when I stopped growing it for you, when I found your supplier. I felt like my cutie mark was tainted somehow, especially since it still didn't stop you."

Rosey's ears drooped.

Digs turned her eyes back to her mother. "But I ... I don't feel that way anymore. I love what I do. I'm the best darn reporter the Manehattan Daily News has ever seen."

Rosey smiled. "I know. I've read every article you've ever written."

Digs stared. "Wait, what?"

"The clerks at the News must think it strange that they have a subscriber in Baltimare, especially since I used an assumed name."

Digs gasped. "That was you?!"

Rosey took a step towards her daughter. "Digger, I can't express in words just how proud I am of you. If I could go back in time and counsel myself, it wouldn't be to get myself off the bliss, but to stop me from ever resenting you in the first place."

Digs swallowed, her eyes tearing up again.

"You've grown up to be a wonderful, intelligent, and responsible mare, far better than your mother ever was."

Before Digs could reply, the door opened, and Applejack poked her head in. "Everythin' okay in here?"

"Yeah, it's fine now," I said.

"Jus' heard a bit o' hootin' an' hollerin' earlier. I woulda come over but I was in the middle of somethin'."

Digs turned her head away long enough to wipe her eyes. "That was mostly me," she said in a subdued voice. "Sorry about that."

I glanced past Applejack. "Oh, are you almost done with the stage?"

Applejack smiled. "Yep. Still got a few things ta do, but since it was gettin' late, I was gonna fetch the others an' have 'em get ready ta go."

"They're all up in Coco's apartment."

"Thank ye kindly. We'll be startin' soon if ya wanna take a gander yerself."

I smiled. "Thanks."

Applejack tipped her hat and left.

Digs watched her go before taking a deep breath and turning back to her mother. "Just tell me one thing. Why did you come here? What did you hope to accomplish?"

Rosey smiled faintly. "I guess what we're doing now. Except, now I understand that it ... it never would've worked if I had tried it my way. Not when I didn't understand how you were really hurting. H-how much I really had hurt you."

Digs snorted. "And just how did you expect you'd sneak into the ceremony unnoticed?"

Rosey blushed. "Well ... I had a disguise that I--"

Digs face-hoofed. "Seriously, Mom? You were going to try to pull that with your investigative reporter daughter?"

I smiled, and I saw a brief twinkle in Rosey's eyes. We both heard it: Digs had referred to her mother as "Mom" for the first time since they started talking again. "It's like I said, Digger," said Rosey, still blushing. "Sometimes I just don't think."

Digs exchanged a glance with me, then looked back at her mother. "So, um ... now what?"

"That's up to you," said Rosey. "I realize now I can't just come trotting back into your life and expect you to accept me. I'm not going to ask for forgiveness. I'm not even sure I've forgiven myself yet."

Digs bit her lower lip. "I can't lie to you, Mom. I can't get rid of all these feelings at the clop of a hoof." She glanced at Rosey's right wing and sighed. "I still feel responsible for your accident. Your career--"

"--means nothing if I have to sacrifice ever seeing you again," Rosey declared.

Digs blinked and stared. "I ... I never thought I'd hear you ever say something like that and sound like you mean it."

"Digger, it never should've taken an accident to make me realize what's really important," said Rosey. "But I'm done lamenting over it. I just want it to mean something. It's turned my life around, and if nothing else, I'll have that." She paused and glanced out the window. "I guess ... I guess I hoped to have a little more."

Digs opened her mouth but no words came forth. I could understand what she was feeling. I wouldn't know what to say, either. She finally looked out the window as well. "Huh, look at that. They actually pulled it off."

I stepped forward. The curtains on the stage had just pulled back, and the play was starting.

Rosey nodded. "A little scaled down, but, still, the costumes are gorgeous."

As we looked, a pony trotting by glanced at the stage, stopped, and sat down to watch.

Digs smiled. "Remember the community theater back in the old days, Mom?"

"I do," said Rosey softly as another pony joined the impromptu audience. "We almost never missed it."

"Even when we were sore at each other. We always kinda put that to the side for a while."

Rosey smiled. "I got my whole weather wing interested in it. They liked it so much, they pitched in every year to help with the setup and ensure the weather was sunny that day."

Digs grinned. "Remember when I got one of my teachers at high school to do a field trip to the theater?"

"Yes, I do!" Rosey gushed. "And Charity Kindheart was so grateful you all showed up because the pony pox was going around, and she lost half her volunteers when they got sick!"

Digs laughed. "One of my filly friends even subbed for an actress. She went on to get a cutie mark in theater performance like three months later!"

Rosey took a deep breath, her eyes glistening as an earth pony mare and her pegasus child stopped to watch the play. "Digger? How about we go and watch? For old times' sake?"

Digs slowly smiled. "Sure, let's go."

I smiled as they headed out the door.

By the time the sun disappeared behind the skyline, the theater had drawn a rather large audience, so much so that I had lost sight of Digs and Rosey. I hung back outside the shop, more interested in pony-watching than the play. I smiled as the play concluded and Coco was hoisted onto the stage to accept the praise for bringing this all together, a spotlight she immediately shared with Mom and Applejack.

When I saw Coco scanning the crowd again, I realized she might be looking for me. I ducked back inside the shop. As much as I would have liked her show of appreciation, I really didn't want to be standing in front of everypony.

As the crowd broke up, many ponies lingering in groups happily chatting with one another, I finally spotted Digs and Rosey, heading towards the shop. I ducked into the back, smiling as I heard their mutual laughter burst forth as they stepped inside. I carefully levitated the wedding dress from the ponyquin and trotted towards the front.

"I wish we could do that every day," said Rosey. "If only so we can spend more time together without ... without the pain."

"Yeah, I know," Digs said softly as I stepped behind the counter. "It's hard to feel anything bad when you're just enjoying something like that."

Rosey sighed. "I so wish--" She stopped short as her gaze spotted me. "Oh! Digger, your dress!"

Digs spun around. "Luna's moon, I had almost forgotten about it."

I laid the dress on the counter and turned the patched area towards them. "I did the best I could."

Digs stepped forward and stared at the repaired area. Rosey joined her, speaking softly. "Digger, I'm so very sorry that happened. I know how much that dress means to you."

Digs took a deep breath and turned to face her mother. "Yes, it does, and I can't begin to describe how hurt I was. It still hurts."

Rosey swallowed but said nothing, gazing at her daughter with as much hope as worry.

"It's what I said before, Mom. It won't go away overnight. But now ... now I want it to go away. And I-I can't do that if you go away again."

Rosey gasped. "Digger ... does this mean ...?"

Digs' lips curled into a tremulous smile. "Can you move back to Manehattan? Look, I can't promise this will be easy. Expect a lot of yelling and tears on my part as I work past all this."

"I already know it's not going to be easy," said Rosey in a quavering voice. "I'm not looking for easy, I just want a chance. I'll have to head back to Baltimare to do something with the house, though."

Digs glanced at the wedding dress. "Can you stay in town for a few more days?"

"Why?"

"How else are you going to attend my wedding do-over?"

Rosey smiled. "Digger, thank you so very much!" Her eyes teared up. "I love you, Digger."

Digs threw herself at Rosey and embraced her. "I l-love you, too, Mom."

My horn blazed.

The wedding dress rose, wrapped in sparkling magic as it slowly spun in place, billowing out as if fit to an unseen pony. Energy drew itself into thin tendrils as they wove themselves into the patched area of the dress like glowing threads, moving with a precision that suddenly no longer seemed out of my grasp, as if I were somehow subconsciously orchestrating it. As Digs and Rosey watched in open-mouthed astonishment, the dress was not so much woven back together as healed. A final wave of magic spread through the entire weave, and the cloth brightened subtly in hue before gently lying back down on the counter. The glow, both around the dress and my horn, faded.

Digs' pupils shrank as she rushed up to the counter and delicately picked up the dress in her fore-hooves. "It's ... it's perfect!"

Rosey smiled.

"I-I don't mean just the repair!" cried Digs. "It's like it's brand new! Candy, h-how ... what ...??"

I smiled and wiped a tear from my eye as I stepped out from behind the counter. "I did say I had a knack for it." When she just stared at me, I giggled. "This may be hard to explain, but I think you two did it, and I was just sort of the catalyst. And it means you were both sincere in what you just said to each other."

I had a feeling love was the trigger, but I had to see it for myself. I had to experience it, and it was the most beautiful thing I had ever felt.

Digs surged towards me and hugged me so fiercely I almost couldn't breathe. "Candy, th-thank you. Thank you for getting through my thick skull what I was really feeling."

My smile widened as Rosey came to me next, embracing me almost as tightly, "And thank you for giving me another chance with my daughter."

Digs turned to Rosey. "Mom? You maybe want to come over to my place for dinner?"

Rosey broke off the embrace with me and smiled at Digs. "I would love to."

They headed out together. No sooner had they left when Coco stepped inside, her face a mask of astonishment. "Candy, that ... that was amazing! I never thought I'd see the day they reconciled!"

I blushed. "They're not quite reconciled yet, but I think they have a good start."

Coco smiled and trotted up to me. "Still, I'm really going to miss seeing you head back to Ponyville tomorrow."

"Why's that?"

Coco chuckled. "You mean besides you being a fantastic seamstress? Because there's so many more stories like Digs and Rosey."

I tilted my head. "What do you mean?"

Coco stepped towards the window and looked out. "I don't know what it is, whether it's the city in general, or Manehattan in particular, but it just seems to make ponies more stressed, more apt to say things they don't mean, or do things they know will hurt those they love. That's one of the reasons I so wanted to put on this theater. It really helped bring a sense of community to at least this little part of the city."

I stood next to her and spotted Mom and Applejack. Despite their distance, there was no mistaking the telltale glow of their cutie marks. I glanced at my own flank, but I already knew what I would see: still blank.

Coco glanced at me. "Is something wrong?"

So many stories remain unheard / So many hearts remain sundered.

"No, not really," I said softy. "I just need to think hard about something."

The sense of disappointment over no cutie mark never came because there was yet one more piece of the puzzle. I actually knew what it was, but I had to be sure. I stood at the point of no return. As much as I had to gain, I still had something to lose, something I had only realized then how hard it was to give up.

Listen to your heart, Rachel, and don't doubt where it leads you ...

... and your heart is where acceptance truly lies.

I wanted to listen. I knew I had to listen. But I needed to return to Ponyville first. I had to be sure I wanted to do this.

Coco touched a hoof to my shoulder. "Can I help?"

I turned towards her and smiled. "Yes, actually, you can ..."

Jump to top

Chapter 57 - Heart's Calling

Rainbow Dash stared at me as if I had grown a second horn, her mouth dropping open as she hovered alongside me while I trotted off to school. She finally face-hoofed and said, "You're telling me that you actually met and talked to the Rose Sunshine, and you didn't get her autograph?!"

I rolled my eyes. "Seriously, it's been two weeks since I came back from Manehattan, and now you--"

"Yeah, but I only just heard that you met Rose Sunshine!" She spread her fore-hooves. "For crying out loud, Rose Sunshine!"

"Actually, she prefers to be called Rosey."

Rainbow gasped. "You're on a first name basis with her?!"

"I didn't know she was famous at the time."

"Not know she was famous?! She's only the best flier ever to come out of Manehattan!"

I smirked. "In case you haven't noticed, I don't have wings. I'm not up on famous pegasi other than you."

"Look, did you at least find out from her why she retired?" asked Rainbow.

"Come again?"

"First she up and moved to Baltimare for no reason," Rainbow explained. "Then a few years go by and she just drops out of sight. Moons later, she shocks everypony by announcing her retirement. I mean, what the hay? Yeah, she was getting on in years, but she was still amazing."

It was obvious that Rosey didn't want her drug troubles to be public. Maybe she should come clean about that, but it wasn't my place to force the issue. "Rainbow, considering that I had helped her try to repair her relationship with her daughter, maybe that means whatever stopped her from flying is, well, kinda personal."

Rainbow sighed and rubbed a hoof through her mane. "Yeah, you're probably right. And helping her with her daughter was more important, I can see that." Her gaze flicked to my flank. "Um, don't take this the wrong way, but ... are you kinda surprised you didn't get a cutie mark out of it?"

I had been waiting for somepony to ask that awkward question. Mom had danced around it several times. I had the uneasy feeling that Sweetie Belle and her friends were scheming away about the conundrum, considering how Sweetie avoided the topic.

I should have known it would be Rainbow Dash who would be the first. I should have also been prepared with an answer, but instead I had to say the first thing that came to my head. "I'm not even worried about it anymore."

Rainbow tilted her head. "You're not?"

"All I care about is figuring out my place in this world."

"I thought you sorta had that figured out."

I shook my head. "Rainbow, do you remember how I still appear as my original form in my dreams?"

"Um, yeah, I think so." She blinked. "Wait, you still do?"

"Yes, because ... because I think some part of me is not yet willing to give that up. And that's what a cutie mark represents to me, Rainbow. It's someplace I'll go that I can't return from even if I wanted to."

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" said Rainbow. "I thought you already settled whether you wanted to stay in Equestria or not. What gives?"

I had a feeling this would be hard to explain. The word "humanity" didn't have a direct equivalent in Equestrian, though it was more than just a failure in translation. It wasn't just having hooves instead of hands and feet, or living under a different name; I had become so used to both that the differences no longer mattered to me.

As I pondered, memories of Manehattan came back to me in vivid detail. In my mind, my hooves clopped against concrete instead of dirt, and the noises of galloping ponies pulling carriages in a mad rush filled my ears. "Okay, think about this: what if you make it full time into the Wonderbolts and--"

Rainbow snorted. "If? More like when!"

I rolled my eyes. "Fine. When you make it into the Wonderbolts, what if they tell you that you have to move somewhere far away from Ponyville if you want to stay in?"

Rainbow's pupils shrank. "They wouldn't do that!"

"I know, but, please, humor me, I'm trying to make a point."

She averted her eyes and rubbed a hoof through her mane. "Um, okay."

"So here you are, doing exactly what your heart's calling is, but now you have to give up something you also hold dear."

Rainbow nodded slowly. "I, uh, kinda hope I never have to decide something like that."

"You'd have to be really sure you wanted it that badly, right?"

"Yeah, I get it," said Rainbow in a subdued voice. "I guess I never looked it that way with you."

"Yeah, maybe it's not quite that extreme," I said. "I don't have anything to go back to in my original world but ..." I looked around as the illusion of a big city dropped away from me, and I gazed over the tranquil and laid back environs of Ponyville. "... maybe I have someplace else to go here."

Bright Flame took a sip of his soda before stretching his fore-hoof across the table and tapping it against a formula I had just partially solved in my notebook. "So you see, Candy, in this case, there's always an unsolved variable. We don't know quite as much about the magic behind it, so we can't solve it for every instance."

I frowned. "That was a dirty trick on Professor Red Quill's part."

Bright snickered. "Yeah, he does that in every first year Arcane Theorems class, and you even went into it knowing the science behind it is still inexact."

I didn't know whether to chalk it up to coincidence or fate that the class had started studying the magic behind cutie marks. "I suppose if we did know this stuff, we could predict what any pony would get."

Bright smiled as he chomped on a hay fry. "Exactly!"

I paused to finish my milkshake. "So did he do this in your class, too?"

"Yeah, but this time he probably counted on the students thinking they should be able to solve it after the Glimmer Incident."

I knew a little of that from Twilight: something about some crazy unicorn who could actually remove cutie marks. "Yeah, but what she did was different. It's like taking apart a machine without knowing how it works or how to build one from scratch."

Bright nodded. "That's a good analogy. I think you'll do okay in the midterms."

I smiled. "Thanks to your help. The class is turning out to be just slightly over my head."

Bright waved a fore-hoof. "Really, it's not. You just have a tough teacher, that's all."

Part of the problem was that I had taken the class when I still thought myself unsure of what direction I would go. I had wanted to hedge my bets. Twilight had been delighted to hear I had taken the class, so she may have hoped I'd make a career in hard magic.

I glanced at the clock. "We should head back to school."

Bright gave me a small smile that seemed suddenly nervous. That I could pick up on such subtle nuances in emotion still stunned me. I remained silent as we gathered our things, which just increased the tension.

"Um, Candy?" Bright said in a tentative voice as we headed for the exit. "Can I ask you something?"

And right there, I knew exactly what he was going to ask. Oh, boy. "Sure."

"Uh ... this weekend ... I was wondering if you'd like to go with me to the harvest festival?"

Yeah, nailed it. He was asking me out on a date.

I didn't want to say no. I didn't know whether that was just pure pony hormones talking, or that I felt comfortable enough around him to know he wouldn't push me into something I wasn't ready for. Yet I didn't want to build him up to a big disappointment if my path led me elsewhere. "Can I think about it for a bit?"

Bright slowly smiled. "Of course! Please, take all the time you need."

I smiled. "Thanks. No matter what I decide, I want you to know that you're a really good friend."

He blushed, which I had to admit, against all that orange and red, looked kind of cute. "Thank you, Candy. I feel the same way about you."

Yet he exuded an almost palpable aura that suggested he had stronger feelings than that, but it didn't seem overwhelming. That helped.

"You know, I never asked you how your trip to Manehattan went," said Bright as we trotted back to school.

"Oh, it went really well, actually."

"Did you like seeing the big city?"

I smiled. "Yeah, I did."

"I have to admire you," said Bright. "I'd be totally lost in a place like that."

I looked around. Plumes of dust rose from the wheels of a carriage as it leisurely rolled past. Ponies strolled at a sedate pace before the houses and shops along the road, the line between road and sidewalk occasionally tenuous at best.

"It's definitely different than here," I said in a soft voice.

"Maybe I'll have the gumption to visit it some day, but I'll always be glad to be back home."

Ponyville was nice. All my friends and family were here, save for those I had made in Manehattan. It tried to be home for me. Living at the boutique felt like a proper home with all the love that I could ever want. Yet stepping out into the streets had always felt a little off, and now even more so. The juxtaposition of the two feelings made my heart ache.

Did I consider Manehattan to be home? Despite all my feelings about it, it still remained a copy of a city I had grown up in. No, it wasn't home. No place could ever magically just be home. I had to make it my home. That was the hardest part; it would be flippant and insincere of me to say "Ponyville doesn't feel like home." I had to face the reality that a more accurate statement was "I didn't want to make Ponyville my home."

"You okay, Candy?" Bright asked.

I smiled faintly. "I'm fine. In fact, you just helped me clarify something."

"I did?"

"It would take too long to explain." When that felt a bit like a cop-out, I quickly added, "I mean, I will explain it to you, just not right now."

Bright paused. "Does this have anything to do with your decision to go out with me?"

"In a way, yes. If it helps any, I want to say 'yes' but I've got some other things going on right now."

Bright smiled. "Thanks, Candy. I really appreciate your honesty."

I certainly needed that right now, but mostly with myself.

"Mom, I'm home!" I called out as I stepped into the boutique via the back way after school.

"Heya, Candy!" said Sweetie Belle as she trotted towards me.

I smiled. "Hey, little sis. What's up?"

She giggled. "I finally found somepony who got a picture from the Sisterhooves Social."

"Oo, let's see it!"

We headed down the hallway and glanced towards the front to ensure Mom was occupied with a customer before galloping up the stairs. I levitated my saddlebags into my room as we passed without breaking stride and followed Sweetie into her room.

Sweetie giggled again. "You better sit down for this," she said as she grabbed a photo from her shelf in her magic.

I hopped on her bed and sat on my haunches, grinning like a little kid. "Okay, lay it on me."

Sweetie sat next to me and levitated the photo before me. As soon as my eyes beheld the picture of Big Mac wearing a dress, I uttered a snort, and my eyes teared in my vain attempt to suppress the laughter that burst out of me the next moment. I fell over on my back, kicking my hooves. "Oh, s-sweet Celestia!" I cried as I wiped tears from my eyes. "I almost wish I'd been here to see it myself!"

Sweetie Belle erupted into giggles as well. "He didn't fool a single pony."

Hoof-falls approached, and Mom poked her head in. "Just what in the world is so funny ..." She trailed off as she saw the photo. "Oh, that," she deadpanned. "Honestly, Sweetie, hasn't he felt enough embarrassment over it?"

I rolled onto my side. "Oh, come on, Mom, I hadn't seen it before now."

Sweetie Belle tucked it back onto the shelf. "Yeah, I only wanted to show her. I'm not going to show it to anypony else."

Mom smiled gently. "Thank you. Candy, I have some letters for you that came in the mail this morning."

I righted myself and hopped off the bed. "Um, yeah, I was expecting something from Coco."

Sweetie giggled briefly.

I turned my head towards her. "What?"

She smiled. "Oh, nothing."

I raised an eyebrow. "Sweetieeee? What did you do?"

She waved a fore-hoof. "Don't worry about it. You're going to love it."

I rolled my eyes. "Great." I headed for the door and drew up short when Mom levitated two envelopes before my eyes. "Wait. Two letters?"

Mom smiled. "I had said letters, plural."

I grabbed them in my magic. The one on top was clearly from Coco. "Okay, here's the one I was expecting but ..." I gasped as I flipped the second one to the front. "Cherry?! I got a letter from Cherry?!"

"Oh, cool!" Sweetie Belle said. "Can I see it when you're done reading it?"

I smiled broadly. "Of course. Mom, can I go read these now? I know I said I would help you with that backlog of alterations but--"

"It's fine," said Mom. "And I would love to know what Cherry has to say as well."

I dashed into my room and closed the door with a push of magic. I hopped onto my bed, simultaneously placing Coco's letter on the night table and tearing open the letter from Cherry. I settled back on my haunches as I slipped the letter out, took a deep breath, and unfolded it:

Dearest Candy,

I am sorry I took so long to write. The events of the past month have forced me to reflect on not only my life but where I will go from here. It seemed so simple after acquiring a cutie mark that fit so well with what I wanted to do, yet I have learned that in the execution of those plans, things are never quite as easy.

This has been an eye-opener for me, Candy, and I feel I must apologize to you. I did you a great disservice for so long. I imposed myself on you in ways that I've come to realize only recently. It was more than just always thinking my way was the right way, but it played a part.

What has been brought home to me very clearly is how much I need to listen to others. Really listen, not just lend an ear to laments or pain and think I know the answers. I need to really understand their thoughts, their feelings, their fears, their needs.

But most of all, I have to let them know what I'm thinking. So much distrust still exists concerning changelings that my penchant for keeping things to myself simply will not work here. I never really understood how much I kept my cards so close to the vest. I think I started to understand that day I told you I was leaving, but I have so much more to do if I want ponies and changelings to trust me. I have to realize that everything I do -- and what I don't do -- speaks volumes.

I want you to give this letter to Applejack when you can, as this part is for her: Applejack, thank you so very much for everything you've done, for just simply being you. You exuded an openness and honesty that helped me try to do the right thing with Candy when I told her I was going away. If it had been up to me, I would likely have done it in a roundabout and overly dramatic way. I still have a way to go, but you helped set me on the right path.

And, Candy, I wish to thank you from the bottom of my heart, for you have helped me far more than I have ever helped you, and I don't mean my new life in Equestria. Maybe you are still trying to determine your ultimate calling, but you face life with a sincerity that I had failed to see until now.

I look forward to hearing from you soon.

All my love,
Cherry Blossom

I swallowed as I set down the letter in trembling magic, raising a fore-hoof to my face to wipe away tears. She had likely never meant to dispense advice to me in that letter, but she had managed it anyway, and it was exactly what I needed.

Some of my tears were not just a reaction to the outpouring of feelings from my dear friend. Much of it was for what was to come. Even with my vision clouded, the path ahead was coming into crystal-clear focus. I thought back to the moment when Digs and Rosey broke through the barrier separating them, how I had managed to look past their pain with an insight I wished I had been able to bring to bear in my own life so long ago.

I had so many people across two worlds that I could thank for how I came to be at this point in my life, yet I could not choose my path merely out of obligation. I now wondered if Cherry had done this despite how ardently she felt about pursuing her dream. Though cutie marks were not just randomly bestowed. They meant something.

I shuddered. I knew what it also meant for me: the one last thing I had to give up. But what was I giving up? Just a concept? Just a way of expressing who and what I am?

I took another deep breath and levitated the envelope from Coco. I tore it open, and, curiously, found two pages inside, each a different kind, plus a newspaper clipping. My eyes were immediately drawn to the first page, and I started there:

Dear Candy,

I had hoped to write sooner, but things took a little longer to arrange than I thought. However, I have good news for you. I found a friend who has a daughter attending a local college, and she's looking for somepony to share the rent. I believe I can share enough of the profits of the shop to allow you to cover your half and still leave you with enough to live on.

Candy, I cannot express in words how excited I am about the prospect of having you work with me. At the same time, I feel a little guilty for stealing you away from Rarity. I cannot do this in good conscience unless she agrees as well. Legally, she's your guardian, so she would have to approve anyway.

Please make absolutely sure that this is where your heart is leading you.

I put the page down as my eyes misted again. I never wanted something so badly in my life. Surely that was enough? I couldn't let myself fall into the trap of "want" versus "should." I indeed needed to be sure. Yet it seemed when I did listen to my heart, it was screaming at me; Digs perhaps was not the only one with a thick skull.

But she didn't come from another world. She didn't once have a different mindset. She didn't once doubt exactly what she was or what it meant. Thoughts passed through my head in a mad rush as I struggled to sort it all out.

I lifted the letter again:

Digs wound up writing up something about the theater, and it wasn't quite what I was expecting, but it was moving. I included it with the letter. Please, read it. I think you'll like it.

Also, I received an interesting letter the other day. It seems you have ponies who really want to see you succeed at whatever you do. I have my doubts that it came from the, ah, company that it claims to, but regardless, the fact that there are ponies who care that much about you was very touching. If you know them, please give them a hug for me. I've enclosed it for your reading pleasure.

I look forward to your response. Take care.

Coco Pommel

I raised an eyebrow as I set the letter aside and looked at the second one. My mouth fell open as I stared. I had not read a single word yet, and I knew exactly what had happened.

"Oh, sweet Celestia," I whispered, my lips curling into a wide smile as I recognized the mouth-writing of the opening lines:

Dear Miss Pommel,

Here at Really Big Important Company of Ponyville, we value talent. And when we see talent, we want to let other ponies know about it. So we're here to tell you all about the great talent that is Candy Swirl. You really should hire her, Miss Pommel, as she is the best seamstress ever! Why, many ponies say that ~~she might even be better than Rarity~~

I snorted as new writing picked up right after the struck through part:

she might not be quite as good as ~~my sis~~ Rarity, but she's really really good! Did you know that she even once stared down a changeling queen? That she actually stood up to the Spirit of Chaos himself? Well, I guess that doesn't have a whole lot to do with fashion but

And I laughed as I saw a mark that almost went off the page as the pencil (yes, it was written in pencil) was pulled from the second writer's grip into that of a third:

it means that she's completely and totally awesome! ~~Maybe not as awesome as Rainbow Dash~~ She's really awesome at everything she does, and awesome at everything she says. Every moment of her day is filled with sheer awesomeness! Did I mention she's awesome?

Oh, the other ~~Cru~~ CEOs are telling me that I need to wrap this up. So, please, Miss Pommel, give Candy a chance. You won't regret it.

I broke into a wide smile as I read the last part of the letter:

Sincerely,
A. Bloom
S. Belle
S. C. O. O. Taloo
CEOs, Presidents, Big Bosses of
Really Big Important Company of Ponyville, Inc Ltd CMC DDS PhD ...

I laughed until my eyes teared when the random acronyms continued onto the next line and then the back of the page. Never had I felt such love towards three little girls. Of every pony I knew, they had the biggest hearts, and now they were trying to clear the way for mine.

I set the letter from the Crusaders carefully aside, as I intended to forever preserve it as a cherished memento, and picked up the newspaper article:

Revival and Reconciliation
by Daisy "Digger" Flower

Those of you who have read my stories know this type of article is usually not my thing. You're all used to reading my hard-hitting exposes or scathing editorials. Don't worry, those will keep coming for as long as I draw breath. Yet I felt the need to step back for a moment and share with you an experience that rattled me to my core.

A little background. In downtown Manehattan, there once lived a very kind mare named Charity Kindheart. Year after year, she put on a community theater, funded by donations, and when they weren't enough, funded out of her own pocket. She put great care and love into what she did.

Yet all good things come to an end. She moved away to be closer to her grandchildren, and nopony picked up the mantle. The park where the plays took place fell into disrepair, and the memory faded.

Then a local resident named Coco Pommel rose to the challenge. Make no mistake, she had taken on something bigger than she had expected, but help arrived and managed to bring it all together at the last possible minute. The resulting revival was a huge success, bringing together those who for too long had remained as isolated ponies instead of a single, living community.

But this isn't their story.

Lost in the glare of the spotlight are the "little" stories. When the play ended, many ponies lingered for hours into the night, renewing bonds of friendship that had long been neglected. My mother and I were one of those stories.

I won't go into excruciating detail. Suffice it to say, a huge divide existed between us because of past pain, and neither of us could look past the ends of our muzzles to do anything about it. That's a vast oversimplification, but I'm not emotionally ready to divulge the details. So why am I going into this at all?

Because I met a pony who exemplified everything Miss Pommel was striving for when she decided to revive the theater. She helped my mother and I take a step back and understand what was important. I saw actual magic that day, sparked by the renewal of a mother and daughter bond that never should have been sundered.

Yet the magic was almost superfluous. It was merely the coda to a vast symphony. No magic made her give a darn. No magic gave her the heart to care. That's really what this is about. That's what seems to be missing sometimes as we go about our hurried lives.

I've heard some ponies speculate that we were never meant to live in large cities. That, in my opinion, is just so much horseapples. The community theater showed that we can come together. We can keep our friendships among the hustle and bustle of a city. And my personal experience has shown that there are ponies who care, and they are the heart of any community, not just Manehattan.

I would love to mention this pony's name, but I suspect she is like the two who assisted Miss Pommel, wishing no public accolades for what they did. Let's just say that if you ever meet a teenage filly who seems to have some insight into what you are feeling in a relationship that's gone sour, you might want to listen to her.

Oh, and if you happen to have some apparel of great emotional significance that is as damaged as your relationship, take that to her, too. You won't regret it.

I let out a long breath as I slowly set the article down.

For the first time in my life, everything became clear. There was the oft-repeated refrain, usually said in jest upon hearing bad news: don't kill the messenger. Yet I had been guilty of the more overarching sentiment, that of paying attention only to the message and not the messenger. The messenger was my heart, and that was something that had not changed in my transition to this world.

Yes, I have changed and grown as a person. That's to be expected and desired. I once might have said that was very human as well. But guess what? Becoming a pony hadn't stopped that. Changing worlds hadn't stopped that. I was still me. No outside force was pushing me along anymore. I had full control over my life.

And I knew what I wanted to do.

I very carefully put back all the letters into their respective envelopes and placed them on the shelf. I opened my door and trotted down the hall, poking my head into Sweetie Belle's room. She looked up from what she was reading and smiled. "So what's the word from Coco?"

Whatever I wanted to say was lost in a swell of affection and love. I bolted over to her and pulled her into a hug. "Thank you so much for everything you and your friends have ever done, Sweetie." I chuckled. "Or should I say, S. Belle, CEO?"

I felt her cheeks burn against my fur. "Oh, um ... she, uh, told you about the letter?"

I drew back and nodded, wiping a tear from my eye.

"You're not upset?" Sweetie asked in a tentative voice.

I laughed. "Of course not! You really are the best sister a pony could ever have."

Sweetie smiled. "So did she give you some good news?"

I nodded quickly. "I-I can go to Manehattan if I want. I mean, that is ... if Mom will let me."

"Of course she will!" Sweetie said. "I mean, she's going to be sad to see you go." She sighed, some of her smile fading. "I'm going to be sad to see you go. But you have to do this."

I glanced into the hall when I heard Mom step towards the back of the boutique. "I better talk to her now. I'm too wound up to wait."

"Can I go with you?" Sweetie Belle said. "I won't say anything, I just want to be there for you."

I gave her another brief hug. "Okay, let's go."

My stomach was all butterflies as we headed down the stairs. Mom was in her work room, humming to herself. I hesitated just outside, and Sweetie Belle nudged me and gestured with a fore-hoof, so reminiscent of when she encouraged me to ask Mom if I could go to Manehattan in the first place.

I swallowed hard and stepped inside. "Um ... Mom?"

Mom turned her head as she floated a bolt of fabric to her table. "Hello, Candy. Is Cherry doing well?"

"She is, but ... I need to talk to you about something really important."

Mom set down the bolt and stepped away from her sewing machine. "Yes, of course, dear. Sweetie, would you mind heading over to--"

"No, I want her here," I said as Sweetie trotted around me and stood near her sister, smiling at me encouragingly. "I want her to hear this, too."

Mom gave me a concerned look. "Is everything okay?"

I smiled. "In a way, yes, everything is perfect but ..." I took a deep breath. "Mom, I want to go back to Manehattan."

Mom paused. "Well, dear, I do hope we can make another visit soon. I know how much you liked it there and--"

"No, you don't understand. I mean just me. I want to go there. To live."

Mom was quiet for a long moment. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes. "Candy, I assume there's something else behind this rather than just wanderlust for a place that resembles your original home."

I stepped closer to her. "Yes, it's much more than that. It's about what my talent is."

Mom opened her eyes and glanced at my flank. "But you don't have ... I mean ..."

"Look, Mom, I'm not even thinking about that right now."

"Very well, but why can't you keep using your talent here in Ponyville?"

"Because that's not the whole story," I said. "I need to do this in Manehattan. Yes, part of it is because of where I grew up. I'm a city girl, no matter what world you put me in. Manehattan is not my home, but I can make it my home. I want to make it my home, and I want to help the ponies there."

Mom swallowed hard. "But what would you do for a living? You can't just--"

"That was in the letter from Coco. She's arranged it for me, but only if you say yes. I'm going to be working in her shop."

In the silence that followed, I could hear my own heart pounding. I also felt something like a charge of electricity hovering around me, enveloping me like an aura, just barely there.

Mom let out a long sigh. "And your schoolwork?"

"I've got midterms coming up. I can finish those, and then transfer to a school there."

"Candy, I ... I feel like I've grown to really know you, and yet sometimes I realize I don't know your mind at all," Mom said in a quavering voice. "And it seems like we had such a short time together, a-and now you want to leave ..."

I drew closer to her. "It's not like I'm going to be gone forever. I want to spend my first Hearthwarming Day with you and your family." I smiled. "Our family. I love you, Mom, and i-it's going to be hard to be away from you, but--"

Mom wrapped a fore-leg around me. "A-are you sure? Are you absolutely sure you want to do this?"

"Yes," I said without even a moment's hesitation. "This is what I want to do. This is where my heart is leading me, and I want to follow it. This is my heart's calling."

The aura I had only just barely sensed suddenly intensified, and I felt a wave of energy, soft and pleasant, pass through the core of my being. Everything I had ever wanted, dreamed, or hoped came together in that moment of clarity like I never had felt before. When it finally passed, I exuded an unshakable confidence that I had chosen the right path.

I heard a gasp off to the side. I turned my head and saw Sweetie Belle staring at me, her mouth open. Before I could say anything, she let out a delighted scream that set my ears ringing.

"I saw it I saw it I saw it!" Sweetie whooped as she danced in place. "It happened RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME!"

I blinked. "Wait, what happened?" I turned back to Mom.

A smile stretched across her muzzle, and her eyes had filled with tears. "Dear ... look at your flank."

"My ...?"

But I suddenly realized I didn't have to, because I knew what I would see.

My cutie mark.

I uttered a tremulous sigh as I gazed at it. A spool of golden thread lay in the upper left, a shiny needle in the lower right. A thread wound a circuitous loop between them, but not before passing through a red heart in the center, having stitched closed a ragged tear in its side.

It was beautiful.

It was perfect.

Mom drew me into a tight hug as she uttered a quavering sigh. "Candy, I'm so proud of you. As much as it pains me to see you go, I will do everything I can to help." She drew back enough to smile and wipe away tears. "And I can think of nopony better to work for over there than Coco."

I sniffled, my muzzle aching from how hard I was smiling. "Thanks, Mom. You really are the best."

Mom narrowed her eyes. "But you are not leaving Ponyville, young lady, before we hold a proper cuteceañera for you."

I laughed. "I wouldn't miss one of Pinkie's parties for the world."

The auburn-haired woman seated across from me picks up her teacup with long, delicate fingers. She moves them with such grace and purpose that it's hard to see the lingering callouses from where they once worked cloth, needle, and thread day in and day out, all in a dogged pursuit of her dream. Yet I know they are there, as I know every detail of this woman who was once so much a part of my life.

She smiles as she samples the tea, and I relax. She has let me pick everything, from the venue -- a little outdoor café not too far removed from the hustle and bustle of the city -- to the beverage -- one of my favorite herbal blends that Fluttershy introduced me to.

Yet I still wait with bated breath until I hear her speak. She gives me an affectionate look that I so missed and utters a contented smile. "You have done so well for yourself, my dear, in the time I've been gone."

I utter a shaky sigh. "I've tried, Mom, I really have."

She pauses before setting down her cup, a troubled look clouding her face. "I ... I must apologize, Rachel, I should have been there for you."

I shake my head. "No, stop it."

"You have every right to hate me for what I have done."

"No, I won't hear of this," I say in a firm voice. "What's done is done. My life is good. I have no room for hate anymore. Or guilt." I slowly smile. "In fact, I'm about to start helping others with that. I already have."

She looks at me with a gentle affection that makes my heart ache, but in a good way. I meant what I said; I have no regrets. I have no resentments. I just have our memories.

And yet ... I feel I must know one thing.

"Mom," I say in a tentative voice as a breeze swirls around us. I grab her napkin before it is lost to the wind. "Can I ask you something?"

"Of course, dear. You know you always can."

I set her napkin down near her hand. "Do you think ... i-if you were still around, that you'd be proud of me?"

My heart melts when she gazes at me with the love that I still cherish in my memories. She reaches forward, and my heart skips a beat as she lays her hand against my cheek. "Rachel, I will always be proud of you ..." She brushes her fingers against my mane. " ... no matter what you do or where you go …" Her fingers trail along my horn. "... and no matter what form you take."

My eyes mist as I gaze at her, enjoying her gentle touch. I almost don't hear the approaching hoof-falls, not until my birth mother turns her eyes towards them. "Oh, is this one of your new friends?"

I turn my head. "Oh, um, yes, she is."

"I hope I am not intruding," says Princess Luna. "I simply happened to be in the neighborhood and thought I would drop by."

I smile. "No, of course not." I turn to my mother. "This is Princess Luna."

My mother raises a hand to her mouth. "Oh, my, a princess! You certainly have come up in the world, dear."

I giggle and blush as Luna takes a seat next to me.

"Forgive me, I only realized now I've been calling you by your old name," my mother says.

I levitate a teacup before Luna and pour her some tea. "It's okay, Mom, really."

"Thank you, Candy," says Luna as she picks up her cup in her magic. She turns to my mother. "You have a wonderful daughter here, and it has been my distinct pleasure to have come to know her."

My blush deepens.

"Has she explained to you about her cutie mark?"

My mother lifts her cup again and takes a sip. "Yes, she has. I don't profess to understand quite how all this pony stuff works, but all I know is that it makes Rachel ... that is, Candy very happy, and that's all that matters." She smiles. "And I do admit, I'm a bit jealous of that horn of hers."

We laugh and chat idly as we finish our tea, and my mother finally stands. "As enjoyable as this has been, I must be off." She turns to me and draws me into a hug. "Please take care of yourself, and remember: only look forward."

I let out a tremulous breath and hug her back. "Thanks, Mom."

I draw back and wipe my eyes as my mother walks away. I utter a forlorn sigh as she ripples and vanishes at the edge of my dreamscape. "I guess it's too much to hope for that she wasn't just a conjuration of my own mind."

Luna sets down her cup. "Perhaps a way to look at it would be that some part of your birth mother still exists in your heart. Beyond that, even I do not understand fully how the spirit world works. What matters is how you feel about yourself."

I smile and turn to her. "Well, and there is this." I throw up my fore-hooves. "Look at me! I'm a pony in my dreams now!"

Luna smiles. "And yet, I sense nothing inherently different about you."

"I know. That's what I had figured out. I'm still me. I never stopped being me."

"That, Candy, is perhaps the best lesson you could have ever learned," Luna says. "And before I go, I wish to congratulate you on earning your cutie mark."

I smile but sigh. "Even if it means having to move away from those I love. I have to admit, it's a little daunting."

Luna drapes a wing around me. "You are well on your way to becoming a strong, self-confident mare. I have a feeling you have a bright future ahead of you. This is only the beginning, Candy Swirl."

My eyes flickered open as the approaching sunrise cast a deep, warm glow around me. I stretched luxuriantly as the sun brightened and painted its morning rays across the room, briefly shining on the treasured letters I had received just the day before.

I yawned and lingered, stealing a few last moments of rest before sliding out of bed and trotting over to the window. The sun slowly rose in golden splendor, and I stared off towards the distant horizon.

How many times had I done this back on Earth and saw nothing but sky and clouds? Instead, now I saw my future, one I could look at with a sense of excitement and anticipation. I had everything I could ever want: a life, love, and a purpose, all packaged in the body of a colorful unicorn in a world I had never conceived of in my strangest dreams.

I glanced at my cutie mark before turning my gaze back to the sun and the clear blue sky. It was going to be a beautiful day.

Author's Note

Please read on into a short epilogue, and this story will be done. A big thank you to all my readers who have stuck with the story this long!

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Epilogue - Full Circle

Six months later ...

"Hey, Candy! Mail for you!"

I had just barely donned my saddlebags, a half-eaten bagel in my teeth, as I rushed out into the living room of our tiny apartment. I chomped off a large bite and rolled my eyes at the indigo unicorn mare who stood at the door. "Ugh, Middy, I barely have time to breathe this morning let alone read a letter."

My roommate Midnight Skies smirked as she dangled the envelope before me. "Not even for this one?"

I swallowed the bite of impromptu breakfast and gasped as I saw the Ponyville postmark. I snatched it from her magical grip into mine. "It's from Mom!"

Middy smiled as she stepped up to me. "Gonna make some time to read it then?"

"I wish," I said as I headed for the door. "I have to rush over to Coco's to put the finishing touches on a dress repair before heading off to school. I'll have to read it on the way."

"I was about to head out myself. Can I tag along? I'd like to know what's up with your family, too."

I smiled. "Sure, come on!"

When I had first heard the name of who my roommate would be, I was sure she would be a pegasus. Only once I saw her cutie mark -- a sweeping paintbrush leaving a starry sky in its wake -- and talked to her did I discover she was an artist whose talent was painting nightscapes. The only downside was finding watercolor paints everywhere in the apartment and having to use a sleep mask because she often stayed up late painting. Small price to pay, as her paintings were positively breathtaking.

I wolfed down the last of my bagel as we barreled out of the apartment. I tore the envelope open as my hooves hit the sidewalk, and I plucked the letter out as we turned and cantered down the street, weaving effortlessly about the other ponies. As Middy leaned over to look, I smiled as I recognized Mom's elegant writing the moment I laid eyes on it:

Dearest Candy,

I have very good news! It seems that my Canterlot Boutique is doing so well that I now have the funds to open a third store. And that third store will be in Manehattan!

"Oh, that's awesome!" said Middy.

I smiled. "She's been wanting to do that ever since she opened the one in Canterlot."

"Do you think this means I'll finally get a chance to meet her?"

"Well, let's see ..." I said as I returned my gaze to the letter.

This means I will be planning a trip to Manehattan in the next few weeks. Pinkie Pie has expressed an interest in coming along, especially if it falls on a particular day that apparently has some significance to her and her sister Maud (so you may get a chance to meet her as well). I am so looking forward to this, Candy, not just for the new location but a chance to spend some time with you in the city that you so love. And I promise not to try to steal you from Coco for my store (as tempted as I am to do so).

I laughed as the police-pony's whistle blew, and we raced across the street. "Sounds like a 'yes' to me."

Middy playfully poked me in the side. "And you can't tell me you're not the least bit tempted go work for your mother, from the way you go on about her."

I snickered. "Eh, maybe. But I get along so well with Coco, and she's been able to bring in a lot more business because of me."

Middy smirked. "If you do say so yourself."

I lifted my muzzle in the air like I had seen Mom do so many times. "I am merely stating the facts, darling."

We both giggled as we turned back to the letter.

I have other news as well. Twilight has informed us that Princess Cadance has given birth to a daughter! We are all invited to attend a special ceremony called a "Crystalling" to commemorate the event, and we will be leaving for the Crystal Empire in a few days. You are, of course, invited to attend if you wish, but that will likely mean you'll be out of school for almost a week.

"Oh, wow!" Middy said. "A Crystalling! I never thought I'd see the day. You gonna go?"

I rolled my eyes as we turned down a wide avenue. "Pass."

"Come on, really?"

"Yeah, really. Look, maybe I get along well with kids Sweetie Belle's age, but a little foal? And royalty on top of it?"

Middy stared at me.

"Don't give me that look! Listen, this is going to be filled with so much pomp and circumstance that I'd be bored to tears. It's really going to be just a big non-event."

"Party pooper," Middy said with a smirk.

I gave her a raspberry and turned back to the letter.

So if you wish not to attend, I'll understand. The only thing you'll really miss is meeting Twilight's new apprentice, Starlight Glimmer, as she'll be coming along with us. Apparently, her old friend has taken up residence in the Crystal Empire, and Twilight thought this would be a good chance for Starlight to reconcile with him.

Middy gave me an odd look. "Starlight Glimmer?"

I frowned. "That's what it says."

"Isn't she that nutball you told me about who went around removing cutie marks?"

"Well, yeah." I reread the name to make sure we got it right. "I think."

Middy rolled her eyes. "You did tell me Princess Twilight was a little ... odd sometimes, but this seems a bit strange to me."

I lowered the letter as we reached a busy intersection. "I'm sure there's some sort of story behind it." I smirked. "Either that, or we're in an alternate universe."

Middy narrowed her eyes. "Don't even joke about that after some of the things you told me happened in your life.

I grinned. "Now who's the party pooper?"

We turned down another more narrow street. The taller buildings shrouded us in shadow, and I lighted my horn to provide a little additional light as I raised the letter again.

Sweetie Belle and her friends are doing well. Mostly. They seem to be more antsy than ever these days. One would think acquiring their cutie marks would calm them down, but no such luck.

"Ha, I could've told you that!" said Middy.

I chuckled and smiled. "I'm just glad they got their cutie marks before I moved out of Ponyville."

Middy smiled. "Maybe all that Crusading had actually paid off."

"Yeah, just not in the way they expected."

"If anypony would know about life not turning out as expected, it would be you."

"Huh, yeah, tell me about it." I grinned. "At least it turned out for the better."

Also, you will be happy to know that Bright Flame has a new fillyfriend. I knew you were a little worried about that when you left Ponyville, since he seemed to have a bit of a crush on you. I had started to wonder myself if he was still pining for you, but he apparently has moved on.

"Oo, you didn't tell me about this!" said Middy in a teasing voice.

I blushed. "There's nothing really to tell."

Middy smirked. "Uh-huh. Riiiight."

I face-hoofed but chuckled. "I went on one date with him, that's it."

I had gone to the harvest festival with him after all, and I actually had a good time. I had never felt pressured into anything further.

"There has to be something else."

I sighed. "Well ... all right. When I told him I was leaving Ponyville, he did confess that he had developed some stronger feelings for me, but he was holding back so I didn't think he was getting pushy."

Middy smiled. "Sounds like a great guy. And you had to go break his heart, you tease."

"Oh, hush."

Middy giggled.

I had to admit, I was flattered by his attention at the time. Maybe that meant I was slowly coming around to the idea of having that sort of relationship. Surely there were at least a few colts at school in Manehattan who seemed interested in me.

I would approach that the same way I did when practicing my talent: one step at a time.

To conclude, as much as I am proud of your accomplishments, I do still miss you terribly, and I hope you will have a chance to visit soon. Please write back when you can, and please give my best regards to your good friend Midnight Skies. I would be honored if she would consent to doing a portrait for me that I might show in my new boutique.

I love you always,
Mom

"Aw, that's sweet," said Middy. "Of course I'd do a painting for--"

"Hey, what?!" I cried.

A sudden gust of wind snatched the letter out of my magical grip.

"I have to get that letter back!" I cried as I galloped after it. "I'll see you later, Middy!"

"Okay, I'll catch you tonight," she said, her voice fading into the distance behind me. "Remember, it's your turn to cook!"

I frowned when I found I could not grasp the letter no matter how much magic I poured into my horn. The wind pulled the letter down a side street, and I turned the corner sharply, panting from the exertion. Yet just as I started gaining on it, the letter slipped into a narrow alley.

"Great," I growled as I slowed my approach.

I ducked my head into the alley and raised an eyebrow. It seemed darker than could be accounted for by just the shadow of the buildings on either side. I could not see the other end, which likely meant it didn't go all the way through, and I had a chance to recover the letter.

I lighted my horn and stepped into the alley. I shivered as an inexplicable chill crawled over me. Only when I had ventured halfway into the uncanny darkness did I realize what so unnerved me about this place. It reminded me far too much of the alley back on Earth where ...

I took a deep breath. "Stop it. That was another time, another world, another--"

Suddenly, a bright light encircled me, everything outside fading to near complete darkness. I about jumped out of my fur when a voice suddenly boomed: "CANDY SWIRL, THIS IS INDEED THE MOMENT OF THY JUDGMENT. THOU HAST SINNED BEFORE US. WHAT DOST THOU HAVE TO SAY FOR THYSELF?!"

I face-hoofed, even as my heart still hammered. "Oh, very funny, Discord!"

"What?" came the draconequus' amused voice from the darkness. "You don't want to reminisce about old times? Some friend you are."

"You have a very weird -- and somewhat macabre -- sense of humor."

"It's called a sense of the absurd, my dear." I heard a snap of talons. The light disappeared, and the alley returned. Discord stood before me and smiled. "Do pay more attention."

I sighed. "You do realize I'm going to be late for school?"

"Oh, pish-posh, you Manehattanites are too worried about time." He reached behind him and produced a mammoth timepiece with over one hundred hands. "I've wasted more time than you'll ever have."

I raised an eyebrow. "That makes no sense."

Discord let go of the timepiece. Some of its hands flapped like wings, and it flew off with a quacking sound. "Wasn't meant to."

"So what do you want?"

"Want?" said Discord. "Who says I want anything?" He waved a paw, and suddenly he was dressed in a loud shirt and sunglasses, a camera slung around his neck. A hat with the words "I Manehattan" sat on his head. "Maybe I'm just a tourist wanting to see the sights."

"Uh-huh," I deadpanned. "Right."

"Oh, very well." Discord's outfit vanished. "I'm here to fulfill a trope."

"A what?"

He reached behind him and pulled out what looked like a tablet PC. His paw danced over it. "Now let's see if I can find it on TV tropes."

I tilted my head. "Wait, is that really connected back to--"

Discord grinned. "Amazing what a little chaos magic can do, isn't it? Ah, here we go. The trope is: Book Ends."

"Huh?"

Discord tossed the computer over his shoulder, where it burst into a bunch of flower petals. "Let me tell you a little something about the metaverse, dear Candy. While a being like me can travel from one universe to the other, sometimes they overlap on their own."

I glanced around the alley. "And this alley ...?"

Discord smiled. "Is one of those places."

"Are you telling me this alley is somehow linked back to my old world?"

Discord snapped his talons, and canned applause sounded as confetti rained down on me. "We have a winner! It is indeed."

I brushed confetti out of my mane. "Um, okay. So?"

His smile turned sly. "So, I can teach you a spell that would open a portal between them."

I stared. "Why the hay would I want to do that?"

"Oh, to visit the old homestead, perhaps?"

I frowned. "Again, why would I do that?"

"I'm merely reminding you of what I told you back in that alley on your old world: there are always choices." He smirked. "I'll bet you're laboring under the misconception that you have somehow crossed a line, that there is no turning back." He flicked a talon to my flank. "Even getting a cutie mark doesn't set your life path in stone."

I glanced at my cutie mark for a moment, then back down the alleyway. I spied the letter and trotted over it. "Yeah, you're right, it doesn't." I levitated the letter before turning back to Discord. "But you're wrong about everything else."

Discord simply raised an eyebrow but said nothing.

I trotted up to him. "I'm not under any sort of 'misconception.' I'm where I am now because I chose to be here. Maybe at one point I talked about a 'point of no return,' and maybe I did think that it was all said and done. But I've since come to realize that's not true. No force or circumstance is keeping me here. I'm keeping me here, because I want to be here. I constantly choose every day to be here and to be who I am. So you can keep your spell to yourself. I don't need it."

Discord sighed and rolled his eyes. "Oh, very well. Really, things were much more interesting when your life was so chaotic."

I smiled. "Then you're really going to hate it when I thank you."

Discord blinked. "Er, what?"

"You helped me get where I am now when you gave me that second chance," I said. "Yeah, I know, you had your own motivations, and that second chance brought on so many changes it would make my past self's head spin if she had been told what would happen."

Discord suddenly brightened and smiled.

"And no, that was not an invitation to meet my past self."

Discord frowned and conjured a pull-chain. He yanked it with a click, dimming himself, and folded his arms. "Oh, you're no fun anymore."

I smirked. "You see, you're personally responsible for my life becoming sane and stable."

"Ugh, stop rubbing it in!"

"Yep, getting rid of all the chaos in my life was all your doing."

He yanked off his horns and stuffed them in his ears. "Can't hear you! LA LA LA LA LA ...!"

I laughed. Discord slowly smiled, his horns vanishing from his ears and reappearing atop his head. "Just don't let it get around, okay? I have a reputation to live down to."

I grinned. "Yeah, your secret is safe with me."

"And who knows, Candy Swirl," said Discord as he started towards the street. "Maybe some chaos will come your way in the future. After all, we can't have your life get boring, now can we?"

I rolled my eyes. "Just no more changelings, thank you."

Discord turned his head towards me, winked, and vanished.

I folded the letter and tucked it into my mane. I stepped out onto the street and smiled. The concept of a home being back on some other world seemed so far removed that it could very well have been a different life. Perhaps in a way it was. It no longer mattered.

I didn't need to go home.

I was home.

I headed away from the alley and moved forward with my life, never looking back.

THE END

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Chapter 27 - A Conversation With An Old Friend

I sighed as Rarity lifted the swatch of red fabric from where it had sat before me on the craft table, its far end in tatters. "Candy, I think you need to practice more basic techniques first."

"But I was doing it!" I thrust a hoof at the cloth. "Look!"

I had folded the swatch once, and now a mostly straight stitch crept along the cloth in orange thread parallel to where I had aligned the edges. The needle still hung from where I had aborted the task due to the untimely arrival of a ball of fur and claws.

"Yes, dear, I know, you were doing quite well," said Rarity with a sigh. "Until you stuck the needle into the tail of my poor Opal."

Her cat regarded me with a narrow-eyed, accusing look from across the room, a low growl rising in her throat.

I hopped off my chair and stomped a hoof. "It wouldn't have happened if that poor dumb cat hadn't decided the fabric was a kitty toy! I'm lucky she didn't take my head off."

"Please don't be overly dramatic," said Rarity. "And don't call her dumb. You should've seen she had hopped up on the craft table."

"I was concentrating on what I was doing."

"And that's admirable, and you were indeed doing well. But unicorn magic is about being aware of your environment. You often admire me for how I can keep so many objects moving at once. That's why."

I sighed heavily and shot a glare at Opal. The cat snorted and raised her nose like a feline version of Spoiled Rich.

I resisted the urge to stomp my hoof again. Rarity really didn't like that gesture, but she tried not to criticize me so long as I didn't do it all the time. It was just another little compromise. We had agreed that solving everything at once was too much to expect. Finding a happy medium took time, which unfortunately meant occasional spats like this.

Rarity set the swatch back on the craft table. "I'm very proud of you for how far you've advanced, and I'm pleased you want to give fashion a try as a career. And I have indeed adjusted your magic instruction along those lines. But you need to pull back just a bit." Her gaze flicked down to my pendant. "And I wonder if perhaps you've been distracted."

I glanced down at it myself. "I've been trying not to think about it too hard."

"I know, and throwing yourself into your magical instruction has been good therapy for you. I just don't want to see you frustrate yourself needlessly."

She did have a point, as reluctant as I was to admit it.

It also didn't help that I still debated how to address her. I had not called her "Rarity" in almost a week, yet I still could not quite use a more motherly form of address despite seeing her in that role. "How about if I alternate between sewing and going back to the exercises on moving multiple objects?" I gestured towards the swatch. "I just don't want to give that up now that I know I can actually do it."

Rarity smiled. "That sounds like a fine compromise."

Opal growled, making her opinion very clear. As soon as Rarity turned away, I stuck my tongue out at the cat.

"I saw that, Candy."

I rolled my eyes but smiled faintly. "Of course you did."

The bell sounded from the front door of the boutique.

"Could you see who that is, please?" Rarity asked.

"Yeah, I got it," I said, happy to put as much distance between myself and Opal as possible. I trotted down the hall and started my obligatory greeting. "Welcome to the Carousel Boutique, how may I ... oh, um, morning, Twilight."

Twilight smiled. "Good morning, Candy. How have you been?"

"Oh, other than a falling out with Opal, everything's fine. I'll be glad when Sweetie Belle gets back. She has more luck with that cat than me."

Twilight chuckled. "I hope she's been having fun in Appleloosa."

I actually missed her (and not just for her feline-wrangling skills). I never thought I would ever feel that way about a kid. "So, um, what brings you here this morning? Or can I guess?"

"Zecora has finished the potion," Twilight said in a softer voice just as Rarity trotted into the room. "She said you can come over whenever you're ready."

Rarity stepped forward. "Candy, I'm willing to accompany you if you wish."

"Zecora said you don't have to rush it," said Twilight. "Please take as much time as you want."

I took a deep breath. Delaying would only give me time to find reasons to avoid it. "I want to do it now. I have to know."

I sat next to the cauldron, staring at the pink-red concoction which frothed inside the flask sitting on a low shelf. Zecora trotted over and pointed a hoof at it. "To speak with your friend, here is what you must do: while Twilight casts her spell, drink all of this brew."

I glanced towards Twilight and Rarity. Twilight stepped up to me. "Zecora explained the theory behind her potion. I believe it will work."

Rarity ran her hoof through my mane. "I'm right here for you, Candy."

"I guess it would be too much to have you with me when I meet her?" I asked.

"This was the most complex of potions bar none," said Zecora. "Thus far I can bind it to only one."

I picked up the flask in my magic. "How does it work?"

"It forges a link between you and the pendant, letting your spirit visit the realm within it without actually leaving your body," said Twilight. "You'll sort of be in two places at once, much like how Cherry appeared to you without actually leaving the pendant."

I stared at the bubbling potion. Having Michelle carry on as merely a memory suddenly seemed easier, almost preferable. Would I see her only as a ghost, just a faded remnant despite Zecora's claims to the contrary?

I took a deep breath and lifted the flask. Twilight lighted her horn and said, "Ready?"

I let the breath go as a ragged sigh. "Ready."

She dipped her head, and the pendant suffused the room with light. I closed my eyes and brought the flask to my lips. The potion tasted slightly sweet and a bit fizzy, but otherwise it felt almost like drinking air. I finished it, lowered the flask ...

... and the world went stark white.

Place and direction eluded me. I barely sensed my own self. For a panicked moment, I felt ripped from my body despite Twilight's claims, and now I existed as little more than a wisp of free-floating consciousness. The sensation passed almost as quickly as it had come when the whiteness dissipated like fog.

I stood and swayed at the unfamiliar sensation of standing on two feet. I looked down at my hands, flexing fingers that felt far more real than they ever had in my dreams. Tall and vibrantly green grass rustled as I stepped forward. Across a gently rolling field, a castle rose against a backdrop of gorgeous snow-topped mountains. Golden sunlight warmed the air, and water softly flowed somewhere nearby.

"Hello, Rachel."

I whirled around, and my heart leapt into my throat. I trembled as the purple-clad vision I had seen in the White Tail Woods, now looking as solid as I felt, stood and smiled.

"M ... M-Michelle ..." I breathed.

She stepped towards me, her bare feet whisper-quiet against the grass. Her beautiful blond hair glowed in the bright sunlight, crowning her head like a halo. Part of me insisted she could not be real; the rest of me didn't care. My vision blurred as I bolted towards her and threw my arms around her. The warmth of her body against mine as she embraced me robbed me of words, and all I could do was cry, my tears wetting her robe.

Michelle heaved a sigh, and her arms tightened around me. "I am so very sorry I caused you all this grief. Please, forgive me."

"It's not your fault," I croaked. "It was all that f-fucking changeling ..."

"There's more to it than that. You really don't know the whole story."

I drew back enough to look at her face, though I could not stop the tears. I wiped my eyes as best I could. "First you have to tell me. Are you real? Are you actually alive??"

Michelle smiled faintly. My vision cleared enough for me to see the bittersweet look in her eyes. "Am I real? Yes. Am I alive? I want to think I am in some way. I still have my memories. I still think. I still feel. Even if I'm confined to this place, I ..." Her eyes clouded, and she averted her gaze in a very Fluttershy-like gesture. It went perfectly with her voice, never rising above a simple, soft cadence that I could listen to for hours. "Well, never mind my woes right now."

I blinked away a few remaining tears. "What woes? A-are you okay?"

She gave me a lopsided smile. "Other than losing my mortal body, you mean?"

I blushed. "I didn't mean ... I-I'm sorry, I'm always saying the wrong thing around you. I--"

"No, shh, stop. You've come a long way since you arrived in Equestria, Rachel. You've really started to mature. Don't toss that away on my account."

My lips twitched into a nervous smile. I always saw Michelle as the wiser one despite being only two years older. Maybe I had seen Rarity that way at first, preventing me from standing up for myself.

I glanced at the castle in the distance as she gently broke off the embrace. "What is this place? Am I really inside the pendant?"

"Sort of." Michelle shielded her eyes from the sun, a simple gesture that made her feel all that more real. "More like a tiny pocket universe the pendant can access. This is a conjured piece of Equestria from long ago, at least as Starswirl remembers it."

"Is that the castle from Twilight's dream?"

"Yes."

I gasped. "You were the one inside the locked room!"

Michelle smiled. "I thought it best I didn't appear to Twilight first. I do feel bad for going along with Starswirl's plan to trick the Princess into supplying the energy needed for me to appear to you in the forest, but it was necessary." Her smile faded. "At least I convinced Starswirl to let me meet you out here. He can be ... a bit set in his ways sometimes."

I tilted my head. "Wait, I just realized something. Are we speaking English?"

"Mostly, yes."

"Then why did you speak archaic Equestrian to me back in the forest?"

"Because that's what Starswirl knows the language as, so that's what he taught me," said Michelle. "Your pony form wouldn't have understood English, not with the way Discord had rewired your brain to work with your new body. In your spirit form, you can understand both."

"Is Starswirl really just an avatar like Twilight thought?"

Michelle nodded. "Yes, though he has, well, grown somewhat since then. But he still is only an impression."

"But you're not," I said in a voice both hopeful and fearful.

Michelle gave me a sad look. "No, I'm not."

I stepped towards her. "Michelle, what happened? How did your spirit get here? How is it even possible?"

"I'll answer your last question first," said Michelle. "Because that was the original purpose of the pendant. Starswirl had designed it specifically to contain a living spirit."

"B-but Twilight was convinced even he couldn't do that!"

"She was wrong."

My head spun. "Why would he even do something like that? Chrysalis almost used it to suck out everyone's emotions! The damn thing is dangerous!"

I realized the irony of my statement; had it not been for this "dangerous" artifact, I wouldn't be speaking to Michelle.

Michelle sighed. "He won't tell me why he ... or rather why the original Starswirl did it. He seems almost too embarrassed to talk about it."

"So he never had any intention of speaking to Twilight."

Michelle shook her head. "That's what I meant about feeling bad about tricking Twilight."

"But was that the only reason you had her do it?" I asked. "To appear to me in the forest and warn me about--"

"About the changeling Sevfivtoo, yes."

I tilted my head. "Wait, what? Sevfivtoo? That's the changeling's name?"

"Yes. His companion is Wuntusix."

"Um, Michelle? Those sound more like numbers."

"Let's just say Queen Chrysalis is rather uninventive in naming her drones."

My heart thumped. "Sevfivtoo ... she was the one who killed you?"

Michelle nodded. "She was also the one who arranged for the incident in the alley."

I frowned. "Yeah, I figured that out. Same reason why she drained you, to get the pendant."

"She wasn't expecting you to show up that soon," said Michelle. "Even though I was near death, she assumed you had already contacted the police, so she put the memory block on you and escaped."

I shuddered. Though I already knew how events had played out, hearing her describe them with such equanimity sent a chill down my spine. How could she speak of such a thing so casually when my stomach still clenched at the memory? "So is this changeling trying to kill me again?"

"I'm not sure. I had to assume so when I appeared to you." Michelle paused, and her eyes became sad. "Which makes me feel worse when I think of what could've happened to little Sweetie Belle."

"Huh? But she was all right."

"Yes, but not because of anything I did." Michelle sighed. "I-I had to make a decision, Rachel. Just as I was about to appear to you, I saw Sweetie Belle go off on her own. I realized too late she was walking right into the changelings' camp."

My heart lurched. That filly really did feel like a little sister to me.

Michelle averted her eyes. "I thought for sure she would be captured and replaced. At best. That she was instead allowed to find the camp and Strong Wing ... I don't know quite what Sev's game is now. All I know is that she must be stopped."

I stared at her, hardly daring to believe the implication. Perhaps if this had been before my arrival in Equestria, I would have simply accepted it. Instead, all I could think of was how I had let a bunch of kids roll over me and precipitate the confrontation in the first place. "And ... y-you're expecting me to do it?!"

"Rachel ..."

"No, let me finish! No one across any number of goddamn universes wants to see some sort of justice against that fucking changeling more than me. But I can't do something like this alone."

Michelle stepped towards me and laid her hands on my shoulders. "I'm not asking you to. You have friends you can call on for help, remember?"

For the first time for as long as I could recall, I wanted to pull away from her. "Why is this so important? Ponyville is too much on guard now. The changelings can't get in without being noticed."

"She's much more powerful than an ordinary drone," said Michelle. "Don't underestimate her. Tell Twilight everything I've told you. Let her decide what to do next."

I sighed and lowered my gaze. "I wish I didn't have to deal with this anymore."

She squeezed my shoulders. "I know, Rachel, but Sev may pull you back into this whether you want it or not. You need to be prepared for that." In a softer, slightly quavering voice she added, "I don't want you ever to be put into my position."

I looked up. "You still haven't told me exactly how that happened."

Michelle's hands dropped to her sides, and she uttered a long, soft sigh. She turned away and took a few steps, looking off towards the castle again.

My heart raced. I had seen her look this despondent only once before, when she had first told me she had wanted to help the drug addicts in her old neighborhood, and I had just told her flat-out that she was crazy. "What is it?"

Michelle lowered her gaze. "You know by now that the pendant has always been an Equestrian magical relic, right?"

I nodded.

"Starswirl did everything in his power not to draw attention to that, but when he sensed a changeling affecting me, he felt he had to do something. He tried to contact me mentally, but I was too far under Sev's thrall. When it became apparent that I was going to be drained and ... and killed ... he felt such guilt that Equestria had been responsible that he activated the magic in the pendant and drew my spirit in as it left my dying body."

My lower lip quivered. That terrible moment in the apartment came back to me in cold, cruel clarity. My eyes threatened to tear up. For a fleeting moment, I hated Starswirl. Why didn't he say something to me? Why hadn't he communicated with me if only to reassure me that Michelle was still with me? "That's who you were talking to when you were dy ... wh-when ..."

"Yes," Michelle said. She still would not meet my eyes.

"So that's it?" I ventured gently. "That's the whole story?"

Michelle paused a long moment. "Not quite."

I remained silent, my heart pounding.

"Do you remember how you came to be in Equestria, Rachel?"

I rolled my eyes. "It's not something I'm going to forget anytime soon. But I know where you're going with this. I've already made my peace with what Starswirl did."

Michelle turned her head towards me. "And what do you think he did?"

"He made the pendant shock my hand in the alley. Yeah, okay, I was really upset over being in a weird body and an even weirder world, but that was Discord's doing, and ... um ..."

I trailed off when Michelle looked away again.

"O-okay, what the hell's wrong, Michelle?" I cried in a quavering voice.

"Rachel, do you remember what happened right before you felt the shock?"

I sighed in exasperation. "Michelle, what difference does it make?"

"You felt something like static electricity."

"No, I ... um ... wait ..."

~~~

I suppressed a gasp when a flashlight beam pierced the damp gloom. I swallowed hard and remained rock still, or at least I tried. It was hard to do when I was trembling hard enough that I could hear it.

For a moment, my hair rose, as if I had grabbed one of those static electric generators. It faded as quickly as it had come, but it made my skin crawl, and I felt like something had passed near me.

~~~

"... okay, yeah, maybe I did."

"That was Discord," said Michelle. "Passing by you, because he didn't see the pendant at first."

I stared. "He was looking for it himself? Well, wait, that's not a huge surprise. I figured out pretty early on he had his own agenda and--"

"Rachel, did you hear me?" Michelle said in a louder voice. "He didn't see the pendant at first."

I fell silent.

Michelle frowned. "He didn't see it because Starswirl was actively shielding against it. Starswirl trusted Discord even less than he trusted the changelings. Since he's only an avatar, he has only the knowledge of the time he was placed into the pendant and anything he personally witnessed afterward."

"And so did you," I said in a weak voice.

Michelle remained silent.

My throat became tight, but I forced the words out anyway, and I tried not to make it sound like an accusation to little avail. "You knew only what he did!"

"I also knew you were dead if someone didn't do something," said Michelle in a tight voice. "I argued with Starswirl. I pleaded with him. I begged of him. Finally, I had to take matters into my own hands."

I swallowed hard, and my throat clicked. "Y-you ... you ..."

"I gave the pendant the jolt you felt."

My legs felt weak. "And drew the attention of the men after me ..."

Michelle turned towards me, her eyes wet. "And drew Discord's attention. I didn't mean for the other to happen. The timing was just bad. But they would've found you anyway, and you'd be dead. This semi-life I have in this pendant wouldn't have been worth it if I had to watch you die!"

"Like I watched you die?!" I screamed.

Michelle's eyes shimmered as she stared at me.

I forced myself to take a deep breath, but my hands remained curled into fists. I turned away. I had no business feeling any sort of anger towards her. I wasn't reacting to her but the situation, yet I had no way to put my feelings into words.

"Rachel, I'm sorry," Michelle said softly.

I shook my head, though I remained turned away. "N-no, it's fine. I ... I have a better life now. I do. I wish you could meet Fluttershy. She reminds me so much of you, even if she's a lot more shy than you ever were. And Rarity ... I ... I l-love her like a mother ... but ..." I whirled around. "But I shouldn't!"

Michelle stared. "I'm sorry?"

"I shouldn't feel that way towards her!" I yelled. "I've only known her for a month! Am I that desperate to replace my real mother?!"

"Rachel ..."

"Am I going to kick my old mother to the curb and replace her with someone who isn't even her species?!"

"Rachel, please, stop."

I couldn't. I wasn't mature enough. Instead, fresh tears ran down my face. "Wh-why couldn't he save her?" I whimpered in a tiny voice as I fell to my knees. "Why couldn't S-Starswirl reach out from the pendant like he did with you and s-save her? Maybe if the d-damn changelings had tried to kill her instead he would've done something ..."

Michelle dropped to her knees beside me, pulling me into an embrace.

I had no idea how long I stayed there. Four years of pent-up grief poured forth in a grassy field in a little pocket universe itself part of a greater universe so far removed from my original home that it rendered the term "distance" meaningless. It was about as much separation as I had placed between myself and my own feelings towards my mother's death.

It gave me no answers for why my mother did what she did, but often there never were. Those answers no longer mattered. I had no one to blame for what happened to my mother other than my mother herself. My stomach turned at the idea that I had harbored some secret hope that perhaps I could blame changelings for her death as well.

I didn't want to blame anyone anymore. I just wanted to remember her. I just didn't know how.

"I'm so sorry, Rachel, maybe I should've pushed you more into expressing this when we were still on Earth," Michelle whispered.

I sniffled and lifted my head. "No, you couldn't do everything for me. I h-have to do things for myself. I'm finally learning that."

"You're not letting anyone replace your mother," Michelle said. "That will never happen. I'm sure Rarity knows that."

I nodded as I stood. "She's said as much."

"But that doesn't mean you can't look to her as one."

"Even if I can't quite bring myself to call her that yet?"

Michelle smiled. "I don't think she'll mind so long as she knows you care about her."

I wiped my eyes. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to come here just to blubber all over you."

Michelle cradled my cheek in her hand. "It's all right. I wish I could be there for you like I used to."

I leaned into the touch. My heart ached when I realized that only this odd magical limbo let me experience this simple gesture of affection and friendship. "I almost can't believe you're just a spirit, Michelle."

"But I am," said Michelle in a soft voice. "Even as real as I feel, that's all that's left of me."

"Is that what you meant by semi-life?"

Michelle nodded. "I can't leave this place. I doubt even the original Starswirl could conjure a new body for me. It took me a long time to make my peace with that. For a while, I hated Starswirl for saving me."

My eyes started to tear again.

"No, Rachel, please. Don't cry over me. You really don't need me anymore."

I gasped. "Wh-what?! But--!"

"You have a lot of friends now who would help you in a heartbeat."

My throat tightened. "Th-this ... this isn't goodbye, is it?!"

Michelle averted her eyes and lowered her gaze. My heart seemed to stop in the wake of her brooding silence. She turned her head toward me, her hair falling over one eye in an even more uncanny resemblance to Fluttershy. "No, Rachel, it's not. But I'm sensing you think things can return to the way they once were between us. They can't."

I took a step towards her and balled my hands into fists. "Why the hell not?!"

Michelle gave me a forlorn look, and I turned away, clenching my teeth to suppress the sob that would have otherwise escaped. I knew the answer to my own question.

"O-okay, fine," I snapped. "You don't have a body anymore. But why can't we talk like this again?"

Michelle smiled wanly. "I'm not saying we can't. You just can't rely on me as you did before."

I quelled the urge to yell at her again. So ironic that I had only just enjoyed some measure of independence with Rarity, and now I wanted to regress to my childhood self, always looking to Michelle to help me solve my problems. Maybe in a way she had become a surrogate mother for me long before Rarity ever did.

Maybe I had relied on her too much after all.

"And here I thought you would resent me," said Michelle.

I stared. "Resent you? For what? Oh ... you mean ..."

"For effectively sending you to Equestria."

I ran a hand through my hair. "I'm past that. Or trying to get past that, anyway. And, well, I meant what I said earlier. I do have a better life here. Even if I have more hair to care for than I ever had in my life. Maybe I should be glad Discord didn't make me into a pegasus or I'd have feathers to deal with on top of that."

Michelle giggled softly, and I smiled. I could never hear that sound and not feel better. "I do rather like your Equestrian name, Candy Swirl."

I giggled weakly and blushed. "I hope you're okay with the one I came up for you."

"Cherry is a lovely name, thank you." Michelle rolled her eyes. "Better than the ones Starswirl tried to come up with."

I laughed. "That bad?"

"Let's just say his tastes are as archaic as his language."

My smile widened, at least until I noticed a white fog settling around us. Michelle drew close to me. "Our connection is weakening. Zecora's potion must be wearing off."

"But there's so much more I want to say to you!" I cried as Michelle pulled me into a hug.

"I'm sure we'll talk again, Rachel," she whispered.

I squeezed my eyes shut against tears and hugged her fiercely back. "I wish I could do something for you. I w-wish I knew a way you could come back for real."

Everything around us began to fade to white. Michelle broke off the embrace and stepped back. "Don't worry about me. Just worry about yourself. You deserve some joy in your life."

What had been an experience I had dreaded I now didn't want to end as I watched Michelle fade away with the rest of the landscape, as if she had been just a ghost all along, or this just a dream. I tried to reach out to her one last time, only to be plunged into stark, cold white ...

... which suddenly became warm, marshmallow white.

I blinked rapidly as I found myself in a tight embrace. I thought I had managed to reach Michelle before our connection was broken, until I realized I was back in my pony body.

"She's coming out of it!" I heard Twilight say.

"Huh?" I said in a thick voice. My face felt wet.

"Oh, thank Celestia!" I heard Rarity's quavering voice. She broke off her embrace and looked into my face. "Are you all right?"

"Um, yes, I think so." My eyes widened. Rarity's own eyes looked wet. "Are you okay?"

"I'm sorry, dear, you ... you started crying and wouldn't stop for what seemed like such a long time. I was worried something had happened to you."

My lips twitched into a smile, and I gave her a hug. "I was crying, but it's okay. I think I needed to."

"Now that your communing is at an end," I heard Zecora say. "Did you indeed see your dear friend?"

I gave Rarity a reassuring smile before turning towards Zecora. "Yes, I did." I placed a hoof delicately over the pendant. "It's her. It really is her spirit in the pendant."

Twilight gave me a stunned look. "But ... d-did she tell you why Starswirl did it? Or even how he managed it? Did you even have a chance to talk to Starswirl himself?!"

"Twilight, please," said Rarity. "Candy has had a bit of a traumatic experience. Can you go a little easy on her?"

Twilight sighed and lowered her head. "You're right. I'm terribly sorry, Candy."

I shook my head. "No, it's fine. In fact, please, let me tell you everything that happened while I still remember it. She told me some important information about the changelings and Discord's involvement."

Rarity turned to Twilight. "Since this sounds important, then may I suggest that you contact the rest of our friends and have them meet us at the castle later? That will at least give Candy some time to relax."

I doubted I could ever truly relax after what I had just experienced. I didn't care. Just knowing Michelle was still with me in some way lifted a burden from me, even in the wake of the brewing storm of questions I was sure would follow.

"Yes, of course," said Twilight. "We'll meet at the castle later this morning."

Jump to top

Chapter 46 - Yakity-Yak

I trotted into my work room with a sigh, having little expectation I would see anything different. The clothing I had patched looked as they had a week ago: quite obviously patched. I had done as good a job on them as any other, yet it remained quite plain that they had been damaged and subsequently repaired.

I yanked a dress off a ponyquin and frowned at it as I turned it over, trying to will it into becoming whole and perfect. Nothing happened, not even so much as a spark from my horn.

Soft hoof-falls behind me stopped at the door. "Still no change?" said Sweetie Belle.

I set the dress back on the ponyquin and plopped myself down on my haunches. "Nope."

Sweetie Belle stepped up alongside me. "I'm really sorry it's not working."

"I have no idea what I'm doing wrong," I said. "Or for that matter, what I did right those first two times."

Sweetie Belle trotted to the nearest dress. "What about that suit for Doctor Whooves?"

"Same deal. I patched it, but you could still tell it was patched. He seemed happy with the job, but I could tell he was expecting magic."

Sweetie Belle carefully folded over some of the fabric, revealing my work. "Maybe you need to cast some sort of spell on it."

I sighed. "Yeah, but what? Other than levitation, the only spells I know are related to sewing and can't do anything like this. Oh, and that reheat spell Twilight taught me, but that's it."

Sweetie Belle let the fabric fall back into place. "Maybe it just needs more time."

I frowned and glanced at the calendar. Time was not something I had in abundance. The start of the school semester was just around the corner, and Mom had enrolled me at Ponyville High School. Later that morning, I had to head to the school to take some aptitude tests so they knew where to place me. Since I had not done very well in high school back on Earth, I wasn't looking forward to it.

Of course, my sense of urgency had nothing to do with the fact that a lack of a cutie mark might make me really self-conscious like any typical teenager would be. Nope, not that at all.

"Did you ever get a chance to look at Bon Bon's dress?" Sweetie asked.

"Yes. It's perfect, just as Lyra had said."

Sweetie turned to me. "Why don't you come over to the clubhouse? Maybe the Crusaders can help you figure this out."

I smiled faintly and stood. "Maybe later. Right now, I need to head to the front of the boutique."

"Oh, are you minding the store again today?"

I stepped out of the work room, and Sweetie Belle tagged along. "Yeah, Mom had to head down to the castle. Something about helping greet some diplomats from, um, what was the place again? Yakyakistan, I think."

Sweetie giggled.

"What? I didn't think that name was funnier than any other."

"I don't mean that," said Sweetie. "I mean you calling Rarity 'Mom.' It still sounds kind of weird to me. And somehow, I'm still your little sister."

I smiled. "Yeah, and you're a great little sister, too." I looked up at the clock. "You know, she's been gone for a while now. I wonder how things are going at the castle?"

As if on cue (so many things seem to happen like that in Equestria), the back door of the boutique burst open, and Mom barreled past as she muttered, "Well, that was a disaster."

"Something wrong?" I asked.

Mom whirled around, wearing a forced smile. "Oh, nothing at all, dear," she said in a voice that suggested anything but. "Just that these diplomats -- and I use the term loosely -- are the most insufferably unpleaseable creatures in the known universe!"

Sweetie Belle leaned closer to me. "I don't think it went well at the castle."

Mom headed straight into her work room, whirling about multiple things in her magic. "Candy, I'm terribly sorry to interrupt your work, but this is something of an emergency. I need to set up an impromptu design session."

"Anything I can do to help?" I said as I stepped inside after her.

Mom shoved several ponyquins to the periphery of the room and extracted several bolts of fabric from the shelves. "I need to handle this myself due to the sensitive nature of the situation." She stopped halfway to her work table with a bolt of pale blue in her magical grip and frowned. "No, no, this will not do! Candy, you can do me one favor. Go to my rare fabric stores and get me a bolt of Crystal Empire Royal Blue."

My eyes widened. "Whoa, that's expensive stuff."

"I am well aware of that."

"Um, okay. Then what?"

Mom turned to me. "Then I want you to take Sweetie Belle and do something else for a while. And don't forget to go for your aptitude tests."

"But wouldn't it be better if I hang out here in case you need help?"

Mom sighed. "You really don't want to be here for the, ah, fallout if this fails to please them. But do make sure you get back after your tests in case there's some, um, cleanup to do ..."

Sweetie Belle trotted just ahead of us in her excitement. "Now we can head over to the clubhouse and figure out how your special talent works!"

"If we're even sure what my talent is," I said.

"But what else could it be?" said Scootaloo, whom we had picked up along the way. "Your horn even glowed each time!"

"And the first time you said it happened on the same night Lyra and Bon Bon noticed the dress had changed," said Sweetie.

"And the second time must've been when your dress changed," said Scootaloo.

I had no proof that the glow of my horn had changed my dress, but I decided not to debate the point. "Still doesn't explain exactly how it happened. Don't I have to trigger it somehow?"

"Rarity said she was practically dragged by her horn when she first found her talent," said Sweetie. "And even then her cutie mark didn't show up until later."

Scootaloo fluttered her wings, hovering briefly. "Wouldn't it be really cool if Candy's cutie mark came out right while we're all there?"

Sweetie Belle smiled. "Yeah, that would be cool."

As we turned onto the road leading to Sweet Apple Acres, Scootaloo suddenly gasped and stopped dead, her pupils shrinking. "Wh-what is that?!"

Sweetie Belle's mouth dropped open. I stopped and stared as well. Three enormous creatures with massive antlers and swathed in furs were being led by Pinkie Pie and Applejack onto the farm. They looked like ... yaks?

Oh. Of course. Because they're from Yakyakistan. Silly me.

"I think those are the Yakyakistan diplomats," I said.

"Maaaybe we should forget about the clubhouse for now," Sweetie Belle said as she turned around.

"Are you crazy?!" cried Scootaloo. "And give up this chance to earn our diplomacy cutie marks??"

Sweetie face-hoofed. "Scootaloo ..."

"Or what about Candy? Or Cherry? Maybe we can help them earn their--"

"We're not doing a diplomacy cutie mark!" I declared. The last thing I needed was the Crusaders somehow starting a war.

Scootaloo looked down. "Aww ..."

"My sister is right," said Sweetie. "Let's just leave this one alone."

I supposed I really had been a good influence on Sweetie Belle after all. She was a little less prone to taking some of the huge risks that the Crusaders used to do on a regular basis. "Come on, let's just go for a walk. I need something to take my mind of those stupid tests later."

"What tests?" Scootaloo said. "School hasn't started yet."

"She's starting high school this year," Sweetie said. "They have to test her to figure out where to place her." She smiled at me. "I don't think you have anything to worry about. You're pretty smart."

I certainly didn't consider myself a dummy by any means. I liked learning, I just had a lot of trouble keeping up with course work when my head just wasn't in it.

We wandered around town while the Crusaders exchanged more theories about my talent from the sublime to the ridiculous. As we neared Town Hall, I struggled not to face-hoof yet again. "Honestly, Scootaloo, I'm reasonably sure I'm not channeling secret amazing latent changeling powers imbued in me by Starswirl's magic that allows me to change clothing fabric into anything I want."

"I, um, think we can cross that one off the list, too," said Sweetie Belle as she glanced to the side.

"But it would be totally cool if it happened!" said Scootaloo.

"Maybe less coolness and more practicality?" I suggested.

"You can never have too much coolness."

"And who told you that?"

"Rainbow Dash, of course."

"Hey, girls," said Sweetie Belle as she turned in the direction she was staring. "Look over there."

I turned around, and I tensed as my gaze fell on somepony I had hoped never to see again. Even from this distance, the diamond ring cutie mark was unmistakable.

"What's she doing here?" said Scootaloo.

Spoiled Rich was speaking with an older earth pony mare, one with a beige coat and two-tone gray mane and tail, spectacles perched on her muzzle. I had to strain my eyes to discern it, but she had a scroll as a cutie mark. They were too far away for us to hear what they were saying.

"And why is she talking to Mayor Mare?" said Sweetie Belle.

"More like arguing with her," said Scootaloo.

Scootaloo was right; Spoiled Rich was browbeating the mayor, who appeared like she wasn't getting a word in edgewise. Spoiled Rich raised a hoof and pointed towards the west, then brought it down with a stomp. Mayor Mare frowned and jabbed a hoof towards Town Hall and appeared to say some equally heated words in return.

"What do you suppose that's all about?" Sweetie Belle asked.

"I'll tell you what it's all about, you stupid blank-flanks," a voice rang out from yet another pony I could have joyfully never seen again. We turned around as a grinning Diamond Tiara stepped up to us. "She's stopping yet another dangerous vagabond from entering this town."

"You mean like she tried to do with Candy?" Sweetie Belle said in a bored voice.

"We all saw how successful she was that time," I deadpanned.

Scootaloo giggled.

Diamond frowned and lifted her muzzle. "This time they're not going to listen to whatever sob story Candy's silly friends came up with for her. No way is the mayor going to allow a changeling to stay in town!"

"What?!" Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo cried in unison.

My stomach twisted, and I very nearly blurted out Cherry's name in denial of what I feared that stupid mare believed of her. Sweetie Belle had obviously come to the same conclusion, as she shared a nervous look with me before turning back to Diamond and saying, "Sooo, who's supposed to be the changeling?"

"I don't know its name," said Diamond in an imperious voice. "And, frankly, I don't care. Neither does my mother. She simply wants it to stay far away from Ponyville. Can you believe they actually allowed that thing to attend an event recently where almost the entirety of Ponyville was in attendance, not to mention the princesses? If that's not a gross threat to public safety, I don't know what is."

"Candy, I think she's talking about Kevin, the one who was at the wedding," said Sweetie Belle in a relieved voice. "Not ... anypony else."

Diamond raised an eyebrow. "Of course the one at the wedding. What else would I be talking about?"

Twilight had kept most of the details about Cherry in confidence to better smooth her transition. With immense relief, I could dispel the horrible vision of her being run out of town because Spoiled Rich had convinced everypony that Cherry was really a changeling.

"Kevin?" Scootaloo said. "That was the changeling's name?"

"Yeah, Candy told me about him," said Sweetie.

"Well, he didn't seem so bad. He just sorta sat there. He disappeared after that."

Diamond sneered. "Apparently somepony wants to see him stay here permanently."

And I had an idea who. I wished Matilda would leave things well enough alone.

"And that's insane if you ask me," said Diamond.

"Good thing I wasn't asking you," Scootaloo retorted.

Diamond frowned. "You actually want that changeling in town?"

Scootaloo's pupils shrank. "Er, well ... I didn't say that. I mean--"

Sweetie Belle sighed. "Not helping."

Scootaloo frowned. "Hey, I'm sorry! This is all happening kinda fast, okay?"

Diamond snickered. "Yes, let's not go too fast for your tiny brain to keep up."

Scootaloo flared her wings. "You know what? I think we should let the changeling stay, if only because it's something you don't want!"

Diamond narrowed her eyes at Sweetie Belle. "I suppose you want the changeling to stay, too?"

Sweetie's eyes darted. "Well, um, I mean ... if he's not hurting anypony, then, uh, why not?" She looked up at me. "Right?"

I had to commend the girls. Obviously they were trying to overcome a lot of lingering negative feelings. Sweetie Belle doubly so, considering what she went through; I suspected she was more trying to please me than express her real feelings.

Before I could form a response, Spoiled Rich trotted in our direction. "Diamond Tiara! What are you doing associating with these low-lifes?"

Diamond gave us a smug look before physically pushing Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle to either side (and specifically avoiding touching me; yeah, she knew exactly who would push back). "Sorry, mother, but it was for a good cause. Can you believe these ponies actually want that changeling to stay?"

Spoiled Rich's gaze locked with mine, and I narrowed my eyes, one fore-hoof scraping the ground. Yeah, just try to pick a fight with me now. After staring down a fucking would-be changeling queen, this would be nothing. One wrong word to me, and it is so on.

Yet, like her daughter, she was too shrewd for that (dammit). She gave me no more than a supercilious look and a faint snort before her gaze shifted off me and to her daughter. "Very good, Diamond. Best we sniff out these changeling sympathizers now rather than later."

Diamond smirked as she glanced back at us. "I'll bet that country hick Apple Bloom is another one. Wouldn't be surprised if all their families are, too."

I couldn't stand being silent anymore. "And that matters ... how? Last I looked, there weren't any laws against liking changelings."

Spoiled Rich peered down her muzzle at me. "But there are most certainly laws against harboring dangerous creatures or known criminals."

I frowned. "Then it's a good thing none of us know anypony like that!"

"Hmph. You obviously still don't know your proper place, and you're still an insolent, irritating teenager."

"Well, pardon me for not instantly growing up."

Spoiled Rich sneered. "Come along, Diamond. We have better things to do than waste time with low-life blank-flank changeling sympathizers."

Diamond Tiara gave us all one last imperious look. "Coming, mother."

Scootaloo frowned. "I don't get what that was all about, other than Diamond Tiara is gonna be even more annoying than ever this semester."

Sweetie Belle sighed. "Yeah. Suddenly I'm not looking forward to going back to school."

I gasped. "School! What time is it?!"

"I think it's almost ten," said Scootaloo.

"Girls, I have to go! If I don't head over to the high school right now, I'm going to be late."

Sweetie Belle smiled. "Good luck, Candy!"

"Yeah, hope you do great," said Scootaloo.

"Thanks, I hope so too." I took off at full gallop.

I sat alone at the center of a sea of antique wooden desks, trying not to make a sound. Whenever my stomach gurgled, the scratching of the instructor's quill would stop, and he would raise a single eyebrow for a second. I wished I had bothered to ask how long the examinations would take. Apparently I had been expected to bring lunch, and I had not been allowed to leave once the exams started.

It didn't help that the instructor -- an older, stern-voiced unicorn stallion with a rust-red coat and dark brown mane, and a cutie mark that was a single quill lying atop a desk -- had a name that did little to inspire confidence: Red Quill.

Finally, after several eternities, he put his namesake down. I craned my neck and wanted to cringe when I saw the propensity of red marks on my test papers. He regarded me for a moment before saying, "Not bad, Miss Swirl."

I blinked. "Um ... really?"

He placed his fore-hooves together. "Really. In fact, better than expected."

I managed a tiny smile.

Red Quill stepped off his chair and approached me. "Given what I was told of your background, Miss Swirl, I expected you to need much more remedial work. Instead, the only area in which you did below average was science."

At least he took my origins in stride. "Yeah, the laws of physics kind of work a little differently here. I actually did well in science in grade school in my own world." I paused. "How did I do in history?"

"Reasonably well. Again, considering your origins."

Thank you, Twilight. "I've been reading a lot."

"Please continue to do so." Red Quill turned away. He levitated my test papers and tapped their bottom edge against his desk a few times to straighten them. "I'll recommend approving your enrollment. A filly your age, if you were a true transfer from another Equestrian school, would normally come in as a second year, but I think it would be better if you start at first year level."

"That's fine, Professor." I preferred that, as it was less pressure on me, and just maybe a better chance that there would be other ponies in my class without cutie marks yet.

"Enjoy the rest of your day, Miss Swirl," said Red Quill as he headed towards the door.

I climbed out of my chair. "Thank you, Professor."

He gave me a single, curt nod and left. I let out a huge, windy sigh of relief, tempered by the loud growl from my stomach. I glanced at the clock. It was nearly three in the afternoon, too late for a full lunch, but I needed something to tide me over.

Now that was a fine excuse for dropping by Sugarcube Corner. All I needed was a snack, and I deserved to treat myself.

When I arrived, I expected to see Pinkie Pie, as she was supposed to be preparing for some party being thrown for the diplomats that evening. Mom had said I was welcome to attend. I considered it, if for no other reason than to have a chance to see Princess Celestia again.

Instead, I found Mrs. Cake looking worriedly at a rather tall cake that smelled strongly of vanilla. "I really hope I didn't put in too much," she murmured before giving me a nervous smile. "Hello, dear."

"Hi, Mrs. Cake," I said. "Um, have I come at a bad time?"

Mrs. Cake sighed but maintained her smile. "No need to worry about it, Candy. What can I do for you?"

"Just a chocolate milkshake, please. Extra thick."

"Of course." She glanced towards the window, and her pupils shrank slightly. "C-Coming right up."

As she scurried off, I turned towards the window and nearly did a double-take. Twilight was leading the three hulking yak diplomats towards the store. I stepped towards the window as I watched Twilight stop and turn to them. She was talking, but I couldn't hear what was being said. I blinked when she abruptly teleported away.

"Here you go, dear," said Mrs. Cake.

I turned and eagerly snatched the confection in my magic, levitating some bits onto the counter at the same time. I took a long pull on the straw, letting out a contented sigh as the sweet, heavy, cold concoction slid down my throat. "You're a life-saver, Mrs. Cake, thank you." I glanced out the window. "Um, does this place have a back door by any chance?"

Before Mrs. Cake could reply, Twilight popped into existence right next to me, almost making me choke on my next swallow of the milkshake. I drew back a step when I saw how frantic she looked.

"Candy, have you seen Pinkie Pie?!" Twilight cried.

"Er, no. I only just got back from my aptitude tests," I smiled. "You'll be glad to know I did pretty good in history thanks to your books."

Twilight smiled. "Wow, really? That's great! I ... " She shook her head violently and snapped back into frantic mode. "You'll have to tell me about that later. Right now I've got a disaster on my hooves!" She landed a fore-hoof heavily on my shoulder. "Candy, please! Go get your mother. Tell her to get the other girls. Tell them to look everywhere for Pinkie Pie!"

"Okay." I glanced out the window again. "Should I be worried?"

Twilight forced her muzzle to twist into a trembling, terrible smile. "No, of course not! Everything's under control. Why would you think you should be worried?"

"Maybe the bit about a disaster on your hooves?"

Her smile faded. "Oh, that. Well, have no fear! Soon as we find Pinkie Pie, everything will be perfect." She swallowed hard. "I hope."

She vanished in a pop of teleportation magic.

The boutique happened to be the closest place I could think of, so I cantered right over to it. I entered through the back, still slurping on my milkshake. "Mom, you there?"

"In here," came the resigned voices of both Mom and Sweetie Belle from up ahead.

"Twilight sent me to find you," I said as I started down the hallway. I turned into Mom's work room. "She said you and your friends need to look for ..."

I trailed off and nearly dropped my milkshake. The work room was a complete wreck. Pieces of shattered ponyquins littered the floor. Bits of blue fabric lay in wet tangles. Shelves were broken or hung at odd angles from their bent fasteners. Both Mom and Sweetie Belle levitated brooms to sweep up the detritus of destruction.

"What the hay happened in here?!" I cried.

"Yaks happened, that's what," Sweetie Belle grumbled.

"A-are you serious??"

Mom sighed and trotted up to me. "Unfortunately, yes. They apparently did not care for the fabric I selected."

I stared at her, dumbfounded. "They didn't like something, so they trashed the place?"

"That's about the size of it, yes. Rest assured, nopony has been hurt in these incidents."

"Incidents? Plural? There were more??"

"Please, Candy, it's nothing for you to worry about," said Mom. "Now, what was it Twilight wanted?"

Okay, maybe this was a crisis, but it wasn't my crisis. I promptly filed it in the Not My Problem folder, if for no other reason than to protect my sanity. "She wants you and the others to find Pinkie Pie."

Mom's pupils shrank. "Find her? Isn't she at Sugarcube Corner planning the party?!"

"Apparently not."

"Oh, dear! Yes, I'll go at once." Mom started past me. "Candy, please, come with me. Sweetie, do as much as you can with the cleanup until I return."

As we headed out the door, Sweetie Belle bellowed, "I'm not touching that yak slobber!"

Mom turned to me as we rushed out the back. "First of all, did you take your tests?"

I took a slurp of my milkshake. "Yeah, and I did pretty well. I just need help with science, and they want to start me at first year."

"I wondered if they might."

I tossed my head when some strands of hair dropped over my eyes. "Suits me fine, really. So, you need my help after all?"

Mom nodded. "I need you to head over to Sweet Apple Acres and tell Applejack what you told me. I'll find Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash. Then ..."

She trailed off into the sound of another slurp from my self-awarded treat. She came to a dead stop in view of Sugarcube Corner and narrowed her eyes.

I blinked innocently at her. "What?"

"Candy, honestly, a sugary drink this late in the afternoon?"

I rolled my eyes. "Oh, give me a break. I was starving! They never told me I had to bring lunch."

Mom frowned. "And I suppose every store in Ponyville that sells healthy food all just happened to be closed?"

I face-hoofed. "Ugh! I do not believe we are having this conversation!"

"Well, we are having it, young lady, and--"

"Look, if you're worried about me keeping my girlish figure or something, then--"

"It has nothing to do with that," Mom declared. "You're still new to being a pony, and I only want to make sure you remain healthy."

I stomped a hoof. "For crying out loud, one milkshake is not--"

"And the hayburger grease-fest you indulged in last week--"

"Which you let me do!"

"Against my better judgment, I might add."

I raised an eyebrow. "Well, at least I wasn't the mare who once ate a dozen pints of vanilla oat swirl ice cream when she was upset over having one of her creations criticized."

Mom gasped. "Wh-who told you about that?! I mean ... that's beside the point! The point is ... er ... oh, heavens, we're supposed to be looking for Pinkie Pie!"

"Well, duh, yeah!"

Mom frowned. "We'll talk about this later -- and we will talk about it."

I sighed dramatically. "Yes, mother."

"Now get over to the farm, and be quick about it!" Mom said as she galloped off.

I shook my head. I wasn't sure why I had flown off the handle like that, or why she got so upset. Maybe my run-in with Spoiled Rich and Diamond Tiara had irritated me more than I had thought. Mom looked under a lot of pressure, too, and I probably hadn't helped. The least I could do was get over to the farm as quickly as possible.

I whirled around, about to take off at full gallop ...

... and nearly ran into a phalanx of yaks.

I stumbled back a few steps and swallowed hard. I stared at them, and they simply stared back. Or at least I assumed they were; it was hard to tell with all that hair over their faces.

"Um ... excuse me," I mumbled.

I turned away and started to take a step.

"You! Little pony teenage girl!"

I nearly jumped out of my fur at the sound of that loud and gruff voice. I slowly turned around to see the middle yak looking directly at me. My heart hammered. "Uh ... y-yes?"

"You always talk back to adult ponies that way?" the yak demanded.

My mind raced and went nowhere fast. "Um ... I ... uh ... m-maybe?"

The yak stared at me for another few terrifying moments before his mouth slowly turned into a smile. To my further amazement, he chortled. "You remind yaks of teenagers in Yakyakistan. Always talking back and arguing with yak adults. You first thing we see that is just perfect and remind yaks of home."

The two yaks on either side of him nodded and grunted in agreement.

I stared, too dumbfounded to speak at first. Only when an unnerving silence threatened to settle over us did it finally prompt me to speak. "Um, well ... that's good, right?"

"Indeed, little pony, it is very good," said the yak.

"Okay ... well ... glad we had this little talk, then." I started to back away. "Um ... bye!"

I took off as fast as I could.

So maybe I should have let the Crusaders try their hoof at diplomacy after all. An even crazier thought entered my head, forcing me to stop and glance at my flank. Nope, still blank.

Just checking.

Upon fetching Applejack, I decided to catch up with Cherry, but I was told she was in the marketplace. The Apple family had encouraged her to get out and meet other ponies. I found her chatting with the ponies who ran the flower shop. She turned at my approach and smiled. "Hello, Candy. I was hoping to run into you today."

I smiled and gave her a hug. "You were?"

"Did you not have your aptitude tests today?"

I scratched my head. "Had I even told you about that?"

Cherry bid her goodbyes to the other ponies before stepping up to me. "Rarity mentioned it to Applejack, and she mentioned it to me."

I smiled faintly. "I guess stuff like that gets around fast in a small town like this."

Cherry gave me a wry grin. "You were not going to keep it from me, were you?"

As we headed away from the marketplace, my gaze darted about in case those yaks were still lurking about. "Well, I didn't want to worry you."

"Did everything go okay?"

"Uh, sure. Better than I expected, actually. Why?"

"You seem a bit tense."

"It's been one of those days." I said. "But ... you don't want to hear all that. I, um ..."

I stopped as Sugarcube Corner came into view in the distance. We stood at the opposite end of the street that led right to it. To my relief, the yaks were gone.

"Something is upsetting you, Candy," said Cherry.

I sighed. "Yeah, okay, maybe, but you're not supposed to be helping me with this stuff anymore."

"I know, but--" Cherry began.

"No buts, Cherry." I caught movement out of the corner of my eye and started to turn my head. "I don't want to go back to -- LOOK OUT!!"

"What--??"

I lunged at Cherry, pushing her out of the way just scant seconds before--

"--nooooooOOOOOOOOoooooo--!"

Only the cry that rose and fell clued me in as to the identity of the pink pony that blurred past. I watched as her conveyance shot like a missile towards the entrance to Sugarcube corner, bumped up the stairs, and disappeared inside.

I turned to Cherry. "You okay?"

Cherry let out a ragged breath. "Y-yes, I believe I am."

I nodded. "Anyway, as I was saying, I don't want to go back to the way it was, with me depending on you for--"

Cherry stared, pupils shrinking.

I blinked. "What?"

"Are you not the least bit perturbed by what just happened??"

"You mean Pinkie Pie riding on a snow sled backwards at breakneck speed in late summer when there's no snow in sight and somehow managed to be perfectly aimed at the front entrance of Sugarcube Corner, and her sled handled the stairs without simply crashing into them?"

Cherry nodded slowly.

I smirked. "Cherry, let me tell you something about living in Equestria. When you see something bizarre happen -- well, more bizarre than usual -- and Pinkie Pie is in the middle of it, just don't try to make any sense of it."

Cherry glanced at Sugarcube Corner. "I do hope she's all right."

"I wouldn't worry about it, and don't worry about me, either. Really, I'm making a big deal out of nothing." I hesitated. "If you must know, I had a run in with Spoiled Rich and her bratty daughter again."

Cherry tilted her head. "Was she not the pony who tried to block Rarity's foster application?"

"Yeah, and she's not even going after me this time, she just kinda got under my fur. You remember Kevin, right? She's got a stick up her tail about him trying to move to Ponyville."

Cherry let out a soft, sad sigh and averted her eyes.

I raised an eyebrow. "Um, Cherry?"

"Yes?" she said without meeting my gaze.

"What are you thinking?"

"Nothing, really."

"I know that tone of voice."

Cherry said nothing, still not meeting my eyes.

I frowned. "Cherry, don't. Just don't."

She finally met my eyes. "Don't what?"

"Don't get involved."

She gave me a tiny smile. "Now who is trying to tell who what to do?"

"All right, fine, then consider it some advice. Please, I know you, er ..." I lowered my voice, "... sympathize with the changelings, but you need to focus on yourself. Trust me, it takes a while to get used to hooves and dealing with four times as much body hair."

"I guess it is hard not to want to help, given my, um, unique insight," said Cherry.

"Well, you might want to keep that kinda low key, too, until Spoiled Rich runs out of hot air about this."

Cherry nodded once, but that could have meant anything.

I wanted to buck myself for even telling her in the first place. "Come on, let's just walk back to Sweet Apple Acres and enjoy the rest of the day."

"All right," said Cherry in a subdued voice.

As we turned, I heard a noise off to my right. I shifted my gaze in time to see an empty cart by the side of the road roll forward slightly. At the same time, movement flickered out of the corner of my eye. I jerked my head around, but too late to see what it was. It looked like it had come from the corner of a building.

Cherry turned to me. "Something the matter?"

As I watched, an earth pony stallion trotted up the cart, nodding to us in greeting. He hitched himself to the cart and pulled it away. My gaze fell to the dirt. Small hoof-prints lay just behind the shallow ruts left by the cart's wheels.

"There better not be," I grumbled.

Author's Note

So ~~not~~ sorry for the punny title ...

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Chapter 48 - Growing Pains

Apple Bloom hopped up onto her crate and turned to face the rest of us. "Hear ye, hear ye! This here meetin' of the Cutie Mark Crusaders is called ta order!"

I suppressed a roll of my eyes, but one corner of my mouth twitched upward in a brief, tiny smirk. The way they treated this whole lark with such seriousness had its own charm. Cherry sat next to me, watching the spectacle with a faint, amused smile.

"Seein' as this is likely the last meetin' before we gotta head back ta school, we got a lot ta get done today," Apple Bloom continued. She pointed a hoof at Cherry. "First thing, we gotta induct Cherry all formal-like inta the Crusaders!"

Cherry blinked. "Um, is that absolutely necessary?"

Apple Bloom smiled. "It sure is! Us blank-flanks gotta stick together, now more than ever."

"Oh, I agree wholeheartedly," I declared.

Cherry turned to me and narrowed her eyes slightly. I suppressed a giggle behind my hoof. To my relief, her smile returned.

"Especially with everything Spoiled Rich has been doing lately," said Sweetie Belle.

"We'll get ta that, too," said Apple Bloom.

I raised an eyebrow. "We will?"

"We got a surprise for you and Cherry!" Scootaloo said.

I gave her a suspicious look. "You do?"

Sweetie Belle smiled. "You're going to love it, trust me."

"You do remember what happened the last time you said something like that to me, right?" I said.

Now it was Cherry's turn to giggle softly at my expense. "I would love to hear what they have for us, Candy. I'm sure it can't be too dangerous."

I grinned, not so much for what she said as the sound of her voice. I recalled the joke Mom had made about Cherry being taught to "speak like a proper country bumpkin in no time." Cherry's voice had indeed picked up a faint country twang.

A few strands of my mane drifted in front of my eyes, and my fur ruffled slightly when a welcome breeze blew in through the open windows and door. The day promised to be sunny and hot according to the weather schedule, so little wonder they had ventilated the place better.

Apple Bloom waved a hoof. "Don't worry none, Candy. This don't involve chasin' down dangerous critters. In fact, it's all about a critter who we think ain't dangerous at all."

I already didn't like the sound of that.

"Don't give it away, Apple Bloom!" Sweetie Belle said.

Too late. I had a feeling I knew what she was talking about. Or rather, who.

"Sorry 'bout that. I'm jus' kinda excited about it." Apple Bloom hopped off her crate. "But let's get ta the new member stuff. Cherry, could ya step forward, please?"

Cherry glanced at me before rising to her hooves. "So, um, what do you want me to do?"

"Hold up your fore-hoof, Cherry," Sweetie Belle said.

Cherry hesitated, but did as requested.

"Now, gather around, Crusaders!" said Apple Bloom

I smirked and stepped forward. I leaned over to Cherry and whispered, "Watch your ears."

Cherry blinked. "Um, what?"

We each raised a fore-hoof and clopped them together, and I braced myself. "CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS NEW MEMBER CHERRY BLOSSOM, YAY!!"

Yeah, I shouted along with them, even if I felt a bit silly. Cherry deserved nothing less. She gave me a bemused look, her flattened ears slowly rising. I couldn't help myself and giggled. I must have had the same expression on my face when they had inducted me.

Cherry recovered fairly quickly and smiled. "Thank you very much for this honor. You really are all very nice."

"So now that we have that done," I said. "What's this surprise of yours?"

Apple Bloom swept a fore-leg towards a far corner of the room. On their worktable sat piles of rectangular shapes under a table cloth. A box sat underneath the table. "Sweetie, you wanna do the honors?"

Sweetie Belle smiled and stepped forward. She levitated the cloth from the table. Upon it were what looked like several placards attached to thin wooden sticks, like makeshift signs.

Cherry and I stepped forward. She uttered a delighted gasp. I just stared. The signs bore the Crusaders' writing, proclaiming things like "CRUSADERS FOR KEVIN" and "WE LOVE KEVIN" (with a heart symbol for the middle word, of course). A few larger ones bore longer slogans, like "SOME CHANGELINGS JUST WANT A HUG" and "A CHANGELING IS AN ENEMY ONLY IF YOU AIN'T WILLING TO MAKE A FRIEND."

I had a feeling Apple Bloom did that last one.

I sighed and face-hoofed. "Girls ..."

Cherry's eyes glistened as she beheld the signs. "Oh, my ... this ... this is so sweet. Thank you so much for doing this!"

Scootaloo raced forward, fluttering her wings. "And that's not all!" She disappeared under the table and butted her head against the box, pushing it into the light. "We made these, too!"

The box was filled with banners and buttons with similar themes as the signs. As most ponies tended not to wear clothing and thus had nothing to pin anything to, the buttons had string attached so as to be worn like a pendant.

Apple Bloom stepped up to us, smiling. "We figgered we'd put the banners over the town an' give the buttons ta other ponies."

"I'm sure we can find somepony that will agree with us," said Sweetie Belle.

"So then maybe the town won't be so hostile towards Kevin when they have that meeting at Town Hall," said Scootaloo.

I took a deep breath. I had to remain calm. Yelling wasn't going to solve anything. They meant well. "Girls? Can you answer me one thing?"

The three youngest members of this merry band nodded in unison.

"You remember how I said we have to avoid drawing attention to Cherry, right? Just how in the name of Celestia do you think this even remotely accomplishes that?"

Cherry sighed softly, but the other Crusaders were unperturbed. Apple Bloom kept right on smiling as she said, "Well, y'see, I got ta thinkin' 'bout this the other day when Cherry and me were talkin'. I thought if Spoiled Rich saw there were lotsa ponies that wanna see Kevin stay, then Cherry becomes jus' another supporter. Kinda like disappearin' inta a crowd."

I just stared for a long moment. "But that ... I ... you see ..."

I lapsed into dumbfounded silence. Something the Crusaders had come up with actually made sense. I didn't know whether that meant I was going crazy or the world was coming to an end.

"We already had the idea for making a sign or two," said Sweetie Belle.

"But when we ran into Diamond Tiara the other day again, she got under our fur enough that we wanted to go all out," said Scootaloo.

"An' that's when I got the idea that this could help make Cherry look like jus' another pony who happens ta want Kevin ta stay," said Apple Bloom proudly.

I frowned and stepped towards them. "Wait. You ran into Diamond again? When?"

"Jus' yesterday," said Apple Bloom.

Sweetie Belle rolled her eyes. "She went on and on and on and just wouldn't shut up! Ugh!"

Cherry stepped up to me. "What is it, Candy?"

I narrowed my eyes at the open windows and door. "Did you ever mention to her what you were going to do?"

"Naw, we were smarter than that," said Apple Bloom.

"But, um, she does know we were meeting today," said Scootaloo.

My eyes widened. "And how did she find that out?"

Scootaloo averted her eyes. "It, uh, kinda slipped out."

Apple Bloom frowned. "She was makin' fun of us fer havin' nothin' important ta do."

"So we said we were meeting today to do, well, important things," said Scootaloo.

"We just didn't tell her what those important things were," said Sweetie Belle.

I glanced at the window again. I gritted my teeth, my horn glowing as I cast the first part of the detection spell. "Everypony be quiet!" I whisper-shouted.

Apple Bloom's pupils shrank slightly. "What's goin'--?"

Sweetie Belle rushed up and waved her silent. "Shh! She's doing that spell I told you she learned from Twilight."

I turned my heightened senses outside. The breeze whistled softly through a space between two timbers. Leaves rustled. Far in the distance, Applejack's dog Winona barked. And ...

... something moved in the tall grasses.

I frowned and stepped carefully to the door. I couldn't hold this part of the spell for long before I had to either abort it or cast the second part. If I botched this, I'd have to wait at least twenty minutes for my magic to replenish before I could try it again.

I heard another soft rustle in the grasses, moving slowly away from the clubhouse.

I clenched my teeth. "Gotcha."

A wall of energy surged forth from me. Where it hit the grasses, sparkles outlined the shape of a little pony. I heard a tiny gasp, followed by a yelp when my levitation magic snagged a filly with a gray coat, two-toned silvery mane, and glasses perched on her muzzle.

Her legs flailed as I lifted her into view. "Put me down! Put me down!" she cried.

The other Crusaders appeared at the door. Apple Bloom gasped. "Is that who I think it is?!"

I smirked. "You mean Diamond's minion Gold Spork, or whatever her name is."

"It's Silver Spoon!" the filly cried indignantly, her glasses going askew.

Scootaloo giggled. "I like Gold Spork better."

Cherry placed a hoof on my shoulder. "Candy, be careful, please."

"Cherry, chill, I got this," I said softly to her.

Silver Spoon straightened her glasses. "You better listen to her! I can get you into a lot of trouble for this!"

"You mean the same trouble you can get into for sneaking onto Sweet Apple Acres?" I said in a lofty voice.

Silver's ears drooped. "Well, I ... that is ... th-that's not the same thing!"

"Oh, okay. Apple Bloom? Go fetch Applejack for me, will you?"

Apple Bloom gave Silver an impish smile. "You got it, Candy! Boy, will she be mad. Hoo-wee, glad I'm not the pony doin' such a dishonest thing!"

"Gaah! No! Wait! Stop!" Silver cried.

Apple Bloom stepped up to the still levitated filly. "Whatsamatter, Silver? Afraid of what a 'country hick' can do to ya?"

"Like tell your parents what you've been doing?" said Sweetie Belle.

"Because, you know, you wouldn't want to lie to somepony like Applejack, now would you?" Scootaloo said with obvious glee.

Silver covered her face with her fore-hooves and moaned, "Please, just put me down."

"Oh, I'll put you down all right." I stepped back from the door and carefully floated her inside, depositing her in a far corner of the room. I made no attempt to hide the signs and such, as the Crusaders were going public with them anyway.

Silver Spoon swallowed hard. "So is that it? You going to filly-nap me or something?"

I stepped forward. "Don't be stupid. I'm not holding you here. I just want to talk to you."

She lifted her muzzle and looked away. "Hmph!"

"Oh, wow, yeah, you got Diamond's moves down pat. You're such a great lackey."

Silver stomped a hoof. "I am not a lackey!"

"Then why are you doing all of Diamond's dirty work?"

Silver gave me an imperious look. "She's just so busy that she can't do everything herself, otherwise she would be doing this, too."

Apple Bloom thrust a fore-hoof towards her. "So ya admit ya were listenin' in!"

"I-I never said that!" Silver Spoon cried.

Sweetie Belle face-hoofed. "Oh, give it up already. We caught you."

Silver swallowed, her eyes darting about. I thought at first that she might be looking for an escape route (which I would have reluctantly granted, as I had no intention of harming her), when her eyes fell on the table. Her lips curled into a satisfied smile. "Well, well, well," she said as she trotted up to the table. "Looks like you're the ones who've been caught."

Cherry stepped closer to her, and I tensed. "Nopony is doing anything wrong here, Silver Spoon."

"Oh?" Silver swept a fore-leg at the table. "What about all this? You can't tell me this doesn't mean you're all changeling sympathizers!"

"Fine, so we are," Apple Bloom declared, standing next to Cherry. "An' dang proud of it."

"Same here," said Sweetie Belle as she did the same.

Scootaloo stepped forward as well. "We all are!"

Silver blinked, her jaw dropping. "Uh ... but ... oh, come on! You're not the least bit upset about this? You're not going to beg me to keep this from Diamond Tiara?!"

"Um, Silver?" Sweetie said. "She kinda already knows how we feel."

"Yes, but now she'll really really know!" said Silver.

"Now yer starin' ta sound kinda silly," said Apple Bloom.

"Kind of?" Scootaloo said.

I stepped over to Silver Spoon. "Okay, out with it. What are you really trying to find out?"

Silver backed up a step, one fore-hoof raised. "What are you talking about?"

I waved a fore-hoof at the door. "You see anything keeping you here? I'm not holding you here against your will. You could've made a break for it any time. Instead, I think you're on a fishing expedition right now."

Silver frowned and slowly set down her fore-hoof but said nothing.

"So what were you really after, huh?"

"I don't have to tell you," Silver snapped. "So maybe I will leave."

My heart raced. I had to know how much information they had on Cherry. "Silver, I'll make you a deal."

"Huh?" the other Crusaders said in unison, even Cherry.

"What are you talking about?" Silver said in a wary voice.

"Tell me why Diamond Tiara is so interested in Cherry, and I'll make sure your parents don't find out what you did."

Silver's ears drew back.

I smirked. "Ha! So they would be upset with you, wouldn't they?"

"Yes, they would," Silver Spoon said in a low voice. "But why should I believe you?"

I sighed. "Fine. Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye. Pinkie Promise. Satisfied?"

Silver glanced at Cherry. "All right. Diamond wanted me to find out if Cherry ... if Cherry is a changeling."

Fortunately, her gaze was still averted when I tensed. "Why?"

"Because this all started with her!" Silver said, jabbing a hoof in Cherry's direction. "She was the first to make noise about supporting Matilda and letting Kevin move into Ponyville. So Diamond figured, what else could it be but Cherry wanting more changelings to infiltrate the town?"

"And what did you find out?"

Silver hesitated before narrowing her eyes at me. "That there's definitely something strange about her. She just seemed to poof into existence one day, and nopony has any idea where she came from."

I raised an eyebrow. "You mean like me when I first showed up? Yeah, that's a big deal these days. Oh, wait, no it isn't! Want to try again?"

Silver Spoon snorted. "Whatever." She glanced at Cherry. "Still, it could be that she's a changeling, but I'm not sure yet." She lowered her voice and averted her eyes. "And Diamond's been riding my flank about it."

Cherry stepped away from the other Crusaders. "Silver Spoon, do you want to know what I really am?"

I bit my lip to suppress a protest; I feared giving Silver Spoon any sort of hint that would justify anypony's suspicions of Cherry. Yet when I looked at Silver, I saw her swallow hard and tremble. She stared at Cherry with wide eyes, her hooves poised as if she were ready to bolt.

Cherry glanced at me, some of her mane dropping over one eye. She took a deep breath and turned back to Silver. "I am an earth pony mare named Cherry Blossom." She paused before adding with a sigh, "Exactly as I appear."

Silver stared for another moment before she relaxed. "Well ... I'd expect you to say that no matter what you are."

"Just let it go, already!" Sweetie Belle groaned.

"Silver Spoon," Cherry said softly. "You were frightened just now. Why?"

Silver's ears drew back. "No, I wasn't! What's there to be scared of? You? Hmph! G-get over yourself." Her gaze flicked towards the door. "Can I go now?"

"Yeah, go back ta Diamond Tiara and tell her how ya failed ta find any dirt on Cherry," Apple Bloom said.

Silver started for the door as she muttered, "I won't have to. I'll hear it enough from her."

"Then maybe you need a better friend," I said.

Silver glared at me. "What would you know about friendship?!"

I glanced at Cherry but said nothing.

Silver snorted and cantered to the door. She climbed down to the ground and took off at full gallop as soon as her hooves hit the ground.

"I have to admit," Sweetie Belle said. "I feel a little sorry for her."

"I don't," said Scootaloo. "She doesn't have to be mean just because Diamond is."

"Next yer gonna tell us we'll feel sorry for Diamond Tiara some day," said Apple Bloom.

Sweetie looked away. "Well, I wouldn't go that far."

Apple Bloom stepped up to the table. "Anyhoo, we gotta start puttin' these up. Come on, Crusaders, let's get goin'!"

"I'll join you later," said Cherry in a subdued voice. "Twilight is back from Canterlot and is anxious to talk to me more about my changeling memories."

"No problem, Cherry," said Apple Bloom.

I glanced at Cherry as she turned towards the door. She had not even looked in my direction. "Um, mind if I tag along?"

Cherry hesitated but did not turn around. "If you wish," she said in a soft, listless voice before climbing down to the ground.

Sweetie Belle stepped beside me. "Is she okay?"

I sighed. "I don't know. I better go find out."

Another seemingly impenetrable silence surrounded Cherry and I as we trotted out of Sweet Apple Acres. She had scarcely afforded me even a glance. I supposed I should consider myself fortunate that she had not simply pushed me away.

Not physically, anyway.

As we passed the entrance, I finally couldn't stand the quiet anymore. "Cherry, can I ask you something?"

She hesitated, then simply nodded once, her eyes downcast.

"Please don't take this the wrong way, but ... were you going to tell Silver Spoon the truth about yourself?"

"Yes."

"What stopped you?"

Cherry lifted her troubled gaze to mine. "You saw the fear in her eyes yourself."

"Yeah, but she probably just thought you were going to tell her you really were a changeling."

"I thought you would be glad that I didn't tell her the truth," said Cherry, a trace of bitterness in her voice. "Now you're questioning it? What exactly do you want?"

I sighed. "Honestly? I have no idea anymore."

Cherry's expression softened. "Well, that's better than what I had thought you might say."

"Cherry, are you upset with me over something? I was only trying to help."

Cherry looked thoughtful for a long moment. "It's hard to tell. I'm upset, yes, but I can't tell if part of that is directed at you, or you just happen to be a convenient target."

"Well, we're even, then, because that's better than what I thought you might say, too."

She smiled faintly, but there was little humor to it. "I do wish you would support me a little more. It wasn't lost on me that you didn't stand with me like the other Crusaders did when Silver Spoon made her accusations."

"That had nothing to do with you," I said firmly. "I mean that. I still don't have it straight in my head what to think about Kevin moving here."

Cherry looked away for a moment as we trotted down the road into town. "Maybe it wasn't fair of me to insist you pick a side. I'm sorry."

"No, don't be. I think I'm trying to avoid trouble, but maybe I'm going about it the wrong way."

Cherry paused for another few moments. "Candy ... sometimes I feel you're very lucky."

"Er, I am?"

She stopped and turned to face me. "You don't have to be concerned with whether ponies will be frightened of you or even hate you. Most know you were once an alien and don't care. You're even well-liked, from as often as I hear your name from other ponies."

I blushed slightly. "So is that what this is really all about? Are you helping Kevin because you think it will be better for you?"

"No, I really do sympathize with him and his kind, but ... let's just say the whole thing with Silver Spoon made me realize just how deep the fear runs. People tend to start to hate the thing they fear."

I snorted. "What, here? In this land literally of rainbows and unicorns?"

Cherry looked off towards the spires of the castle. Even from this distance, they could be seen rising majestically above the town, sparkling in the bright sunlight. "Twilight explained this to me once. Yes, harmony and friendship are palpable forces that are woven into the magic that sustains Equestria, but they're not all-powerful. They don't solve everything."

"Now you know how I felt when she tried to explain the limitations of magic when I wanted a new body for you."

Cherry turned back to me. "The way she put it was: friendship doesn't solve problems; harmony doesn't solve problems; it's ponies using friendship and harmony that solves problems."

My gaze flicked briefly to the castle before returning to Cherry. "You really feel that strongly about helping Kevin?"

"I do." Her eyes glistened. "But I don't want this to be a wedge between us."

"Oh, well, it really isn't, I--"

"It is," Cherry declared. "All we've done the past week or so is argue. I don't want it to be that way. I ... I don't want our last days together to be like this."

My eyes widened. "Our last days? What the hay are you talking about? Neither of us are going anywhere!"

"Candy, you're going to start school very soon," Cherry said in a soft voice. "You're going to be around ponies your own age. You're going to find new friends, new interests, virtually a new life all over again. Eventually, you'll sort out what your talent is, and that will take you down yet another path that will diverge from mine."

"All right, now you're being ridiculous!" I said. "Look at Twilight and her friends. Look how different they all are and how different their lives are. You see them worrying about that?"

"It's not the same thing, and you know it," said Cherry. "Or at least I assume you do. Did any of them ever tell you about what brought them together?"

I rolled my eyes. "Yeah, I know, sonic rainboom, helped them get their cutie marks, and so on. What's your point?"

"They share a virtually unbreakable bond with one another. They will never drift too far from--"

"What, and we don't?!"

Cherry cast her gaze downward. "See, it's happening again. Arguing."

I frowned. "Of course I'm going to argue with you if you say something that doesn't make any sense."

Cherry raised her head. "This is my point: no matter what we do, we're going to drift apart. The bond we share is different from theirs. We came together in our world for a reason. I gave you support when you felt you had none. Then you supported and helped protect me when I needed it."

"Um, Cherry?" I said. "Isn't that the very definition of friendship?"

Cherry stepped closer to me. "I'm simply trying to clarify what kind of friendship it is. I never said we would stop being friends, Candy."

"Then what is it?" I said in a softer voice. "Why are you bringing this up?"

Cherry looked off towards the countryside past the farm. "I just have this very strong feeling that our paths in this world will become so divergent that we just won't be in constant contact with each other for much longer."

"Why?" I demanded. "Do you already have in mind something you want to do?"

Cherry was very quiet for a few moments. She craned her neck and glanced at her still empty flank. "I'm not sure. I need to think on it some more."

"I guess I just assumed that you would keep telling Twilight everything you remember of the changelings. That's going to take a while."

"But it's like you once said about working in the boutique," said Cherry. "It's a job, a task, one that you enjoy doing, but it's not a calling. I feel the same way about this."

I refused to continue along this line of thinking. I had convinced myself that I just didn't want to jump to conclusions, but I still had a bad habit of wanting to avoid any glimpse of the truth when it was not to my liking. Maybe that was why I didn't worry about us arguing. I wanted to believe we would always be there to patch things up later and not have to worry about leaving lingering resentments. I never contemplated that we would no longer have the chance because of distance, either physical or emotional.

I had been forced to say goodbye to her before; I refused to be forced to say it again.

"Candy?"

She jolted me out of my reverie, and I gazed at her glistening eyes.

"Can we agree to disagree for now?" Cherry said. "Please? Can we just stop arguing?"

That wasn't going to be enough. I shuddered as I could almost see the gulf that had opened between us, as if I were standing on the precipice of a deep chasm I had only just stumbled upon. "I have a better idea. Let's spend tomorrow together. Just you and me, and we just don't worry about changelings or Spoiled Rich or whatever."

Cherry slowly smiled. "I would like that. Oh, but don't you have to ask Rarity if she can do without you in the boutique?"

I shook my head. "Mom is planning on holding some sort of communal pet-grooming day at the boutique tomorrow. The few times I stayed for dinner with the Apple family, I found out my allergy to dogs followed me here."

"That's too bad," said Cherry. "Winona is a very friendly little dog."

I rolled my eyes but grinned. "Uh, yeah, that's kinda how I found out about the allergy."

"At least you're not allergic to cats. You can get along with Opal okay."

"If by 'get along' you mean operating under an unspoken peace treaty of mutual loathing from a distance, then yeah."

Cherry giggled. "I better get going to the castle. Would you accompany me?"

I smiled. "Gladly."

As much as I was grateful for this truce, I could not completely banish my uneasy feelings. Cherry never brought up a subject for no reason. She still had something on her mind, something she feared would lead to us parting ways.

I had convinced myself I no longer depended on her, but had I been fooling myself all along? Despite not going to her for advice, or to hear my laments, or to let me cry until my tears were spent, did I still feel such a strong attachment that I truly could not let her go?

Even now, was I still clinging to the past?

Jump to top

Chapter 1 - A Second Chance

Author's Note

This takes place early in season five, soon after "Castle Sweet Castle".

Chapter 1 - A Second Chance

My lungs burned as I ran past the impotent pale glow of the street lamps, struggling not to slip on the wet pavement and failing. I wiped blood from the deep scratch on my face as I stumbled back into a desperate run. My throat was parched despite the dampness, and my legs were lead.

I clutched my chest, my fingers curling as if to pierce my blouse and encircle the pendant between my breasts. My heart pounded in my ears, almost drowning out the determined footfalls behind me. I forced my hand to loosen, as nothing and no one from my past was going to help now.

I found a darkened lamppost and swung into an alley, the stench of decay and neglect wrinkling my nose despite the months I had been on the streets. My gasps for breath were interspersed with whimpers.

I crouched behind a dumpster trying to calm my breathing so it would not be heard. Instead, it heaved and stuttered, and I squeezed my eyes tight against tears. Despite my earlier attempt to break myself of the habit, my fingers were again searching for that stupid pendant. I refused to blame Michelle. I made my own bad decisions. I was the one who decided to run away from everything after her death.

I heard footsteps stop at the mouth of the alley. I felt sick. I forced my breathing to slow despite how my lungs ached. I saw my visions of adulthood shatter like delicate crystal. I was never really any older than my sixteen years. I had only been fooling myself.

I suppressed a gasp when a flashlight beam pierced the damp gloom. I swallowed hard and remained rock still, or at least I tried. It was hard to do when I was trembling hard enough that I could hear it.

For a moment, my hair rose, as if I had grabbed one of those static electric generators. It faded as quickly as it had come, but it made my skin crawl, and I felt like something had passed near me.

Footsteps sounded like lead blocks tramping against the detritus of the alley as the flashlight beam narrowed. I smelled old cigarettes and cheap booze. I held my breath. They were passing by me. They didn't see me. I was going to live another ...

I felt something like a mild electric shock against my hand, and my body jerked. The flashlight swung hard and blinded me.

I leapt from my hiding place and tried to push past the man holding the flashlight. Fingers like steel bands closed around my wrist, and I was flung into some garbage cans. My head rang from the impact, and I nearly let loose my meager dinner on the pavement.

I was still half-retching when I was lifted to my feet, only to be backhanded across the face and sent plowing into the cans again. I was pulled to my unsteady feet, my back hurtled against the wall to the cry, "Get up, you fucking bitch."

Two men had assaulted me, and now a third stepped into the alley. He didn't run, just meandered along. My heart lurched when he pulled out the gun and pointed it at me.

He waited. He wanted me to plead. He wanted me to beg for my life. So I did, because I was a coward.

"I didn't do it!" I screamed. "I didn't rat you out to the cops!"

"Uh-huh," said the man in the white suit in a mocking voice. "Sure you didn't."

I clenched my teeth. I had wanted to. So help me, I wanted to. Less of his scum on the streets, the better. But I wasn't dumb. Well, not that dumb.

"I saw you myself," said the man. "I saw you walk into that police station."

"It wasn't me!" I cried.

"You even gloated to one of my men afterward."

"It wasn't me!" I shrieked.

One of his henchmen punched me in the stomach. I sunk to my knees, gasping for breath. Someone set me up. That was the only explanation. It didn't matter. I was going to die. I burst into tears.

"Look up."

I whimpered and ducked my head.

"Look up, you stupid bitch."

My hair was grabbed, and my head forced up.

It wasn't like in the movies. The bad guy doesn't say some badass line. He just pulled the trigger.

My eyes slammed shut. The explosion momentarily deafened me, and every muscle in my body tensed. I braced for the impact of the bullet, the only sound that of my own ragged breathing.

I waited.

And waited.

I swallowed hard and cracked open an eye. He was still standing there, still holding the gun, still as confident as before. Had his gun misfired? Why didn't he shoot again?

I finally opened my eyes fully. "Wh-what the hell ...?"

He and his henchmen were frozen. So was his gun. So was his bullet. It hung in mid-air, halfway between the gun barrel and my left breast.

"Well, you appear to be in a bit of a quandary, don't you?"

I gasped and flinched at the sound of the disembodied male voice that echoed through the alley. Everything around me was fading to darkness, save for a single circle of brightening light centered around me.

"You seem to be at the end of your proverbial rope," said the voice with a bit of a chuckle. "Though I imagine that bullet is not quite as proverbial, is it?"

The voice was followed by a soft crunching sound.

I closed my eyes, paused, and opened them again, believing that would somehow dispel the illusion. "Who are you?" I demanded, my voice quavering as I wiped my eyes with my sleeve.

I heard something shuffle in a darkness so absolute that I could no longer see the alley or my assailants. All that shared the spotlight was that bullet. His footsteps sounded odd. Every other step sounded like the clop of a hoof.

"Lucky for you, I've learned how to stop time," said the voice in a tone that was both amused and smug. "Though it lasts only for a short while, so we ought to get down to business."

My heart hammered even harder than it had when I stared down the barrel of the gun. "You still haven't answered my question! Who are you?"

"Does it matter?"

"It does matter!" I shouted. "How do I know I'm not already d-dead?"

"I suppose you might as well be," said the entity in a casual, almost bored voice, followed by that crunching sound again. "In which case, what do you have to lose, hmm?"

"You're not making any sense."

"I could say the same for your life, my dear."

I clenched my teeth and choked down my initial retort. "What would you know about it?" I finally said in a low, tense voice.

"Oh, more than you could possibly know," said the entity with a chuckle. "But I am intrigued. What if you are dead? What would you be thinking about all this?"

I was not particularly religious. My mother used to drag me to church on Sundays, but even she was never serious about it, and I didn't remember what denomination it was. "I don't know. Maybe this is some sort of judgment?"

The entity's voice swelled, reverberating from every direction in the void. "YES, RACHEL DARROW, THIS IS INDEED THE MOMENT OF THY JUDGMENT. THOU HAST SINNED BEFORE US. WHAT DOST THOU HATH TO SAY FOR THYSELF?!"

My heart leapt into my throat, not so much out of a need to kneel before a God I had never really worshiped as the simple fear of the unknown. My moment of terror dissolved into confusion when the entity burst out laughing.

"Oh, my ... oh, dear ... the look on your face just now ... I simply do not understand how dear Luna never drove her subjects insane with that voice, but I suppose it does have its uses."

And there was that damn crunching noise again.

My hands clenched into fists. "Look, what is this all about?!"

"You're about to die."

I shivered as I glanced at the bullet. "Yeah, tell me something I don't know."

"I once planted a seed that did not truly flourish for over one thousand years."

"What??"

"You said tell you something you didn't know," said the entity. "Bet you didn't know that!"

"Stop playing games!" I cried. "How are you even doing this?"

"Magic, of course."

"I said--!"

"Oh, yes, that's right," said the entity with a tired sigh. "You don't have that sort of thing in your world. Well, at least until I showed up. See? You get the possibility of a second chance and get to see some real magic. You lucky girl!"

I closed my eyes and curled my fingers around the pendant, trying to calm myself. My eyes widened when I finally realized what he had said. "Wait, what? Second chance?"

"Oh, did I forget to mention that?"

My heart thumped. "What did you mean by second chance?"

"Exactly as it sounds, my dear."

I let out a ragged sigh. What would have happened if I had gotten to Michelle in time before she OD'ed? What if I had known she was doing it in the first place? What if I had learned from what had happened to my mother?

"You can ... y-you can give me a chance to do this over again?" I said in a small voice as I trembled. "And fix what I did wrong?"

"Oh, heavens, no."

My head jerked up. "Huh? But I thought you said--"

"What I mean, little girl, is that you get a chance at a fresh start. A complete wiping of the slate, a change of scenery, a new life. Oh, and most importantly, you get to not die."

Was he serious? Was any of this even real? Or had that bullet already impacted with my heart, and I was lying in a pool of blood having this strange dream as my life ebbed away?

"Be honest with yourself, Rachel," said the entity as I sensed it drawing closer to me. "You didn't really want a chance to repeat your same sorry existence again, did you?"

I closed my eyes and turned my head away. "How the hell would you know?"

"Because I've been watching you these past few months. I know you've been running away from how terrible you feel your life has become."

I opened my eyes and narrowed them in the direction of the voice. "Did you cause any of that?!"

"Me? Not at all! Your life was already so wonderfully chaotic when I arrived."

I could not tell whether he was being sarcastic or not. It didn't matter. He was right. I was running. It was all I knew how to do anymore. Now he was offering exactly what I thought I wanted: an escape. "I don't want to start life again as a baby. I don't want to have to grow up again."

"Oh, I would not dream of sending you back to such a drab human existence."

One word.

One damn word.

It had slipped by unnoticed in my emotionally charged state, and he had been counting on it.

"I just don't want something worse than what I had, and what the hell is that crunching noise?!"

"Popcorn," said the entity, and a colorful cardboard box was thrust into the light. "Want some?"

My eyes widened as I stared, not at the buttery contents of the box, but at what held it. It was a claw, like that of a large bird. Breathing hard, I pushed the box away with a shaking hand.

"I suppose you require some conditions," said the entity, sounding bored. "Very well. You will keep your current age. You will keep your personality. You will keep your gender. Satisfied?"

I was trembling. I still saw that claw in my mind's eye and remembered the sound of his footsteps. I had said I was not religious, but certain imagery was inescapable. "A-are you the devil?"

The entity paused, snorted, and let out a gale of laughter. Popcorn suddenly showered me.

"Oh, g-gracious, me," the entity gasped between peals of mirth. "Oh, my word ... y-you think I'm the devil ... th-that I'm your Satan ... oh, you really should have gone into stand up comedy!"

"That's what you led me to believe!" I cried, my cheeks growing warm.

"Now, don't let a certain yellow pegasus hear you say that about me. She just might scold you, and that's a fate worse than death."

Yellow pegasus? What the hell was he talking about now? "Then what are you?"

"Merely a Spirit of Chaos, my dear."

"And what's so chaotic about this?"

The entity gasped. "What's not chaotic about it? Plucking you from one life and dropping you in another where no one knows you and you know no one? Having you stumble about trying to figure out which end is up?"

"Then how is it going to be any better than--?"

"Than being dead approximately two seconds after time resumes?"

"You're not giving me any choice."

"Nonsense. There are always choices."

"Then ... then I choose take the pendant with me."

I expected the entity to refuse, but Michelle had me make that promise to her: don't let myself be parted from the pendant. I had been such a lousy friend towards her that I owed her that much, despite how it reminded me of my failure.

Instead, the entity chuckled. "Now, why would I ever want to part you from it?"

I could not tell whether his tone was amused or sinister. Or both.

"So what will it be, Rachel?" the entity asked. "Death? Or a new life?"

There were so many questions I should have asked and insisted he answer. Ultimately, I was a coward. I didn't want to die. I still doubted this was really happening, and it didn't matter what I chose.

"I choose a new life," I said.

"Wonderful!" said the entity in a joyous voice. "Oh, but I need to read you the fine print."

"Huh? What fine--?"

"This offer is presented as-is, with no warranties explicit or implied. No guarantee is made that offer will be suitable for any particular purpose, color, party, or fashion statement. Offer may not be sold, redistributed, transferred, relicensed, lent, thrown out, spindled, mutilated, repainted, regifted, reversed, or revised. Offer not valid in Utah, Alaska, or Tartarus. The Spirit of Chaos is not responsible for any damage, injury, embarrassment, mayhem, ruckus, fracas, or hilarity that may ensue with your transformation."

My eyes widened. "Wait, what did you mean by transformation?"

"Too late now, Rachel. Have a nice life!"

I heard a snap, and everything went black.

My spiral back to consciousness was like trying to swim through cotton candy which clung to the recesses of my mind. My senses started to return before I was fully lucid. Strangely, smell came back first. Fresh air, grass, flowers, and ... apples? I never had discerned odors like that so precisely in my life. I thought maybe I was dreaming, something to comfort me while I died.

Then sound returned, a flapping noise like that of a big bird. A slightly raspy female voice, speaking a foreign language ... but, no ... I understood it. I was being asked if I was okay. I tried to respond but couldn't move.

Something hard nudged me in the shoulder. I was on the ground on my stomach. My arms and legs felt weird. My mind was still fuzzy. Did that bird fly off? Where was the person who was talking to me?

More sound up ahead. I felt the strangest damn sensation on my head, like something had moved of its own accord, and the sound became clearer. The noise was a harsh, irregular beat, too heavy for footfalls.

My strength was starting to return. I tried to move. Why couldn't I feel my hands and feet?

"Look, she's getting up!" said the voice from earlier. A persistent flapping noise accompanied it.

"Oh, thank goodness!" came a whispery voice.

"Maybe she was just asleep after all," came a high-pitched bubbly voice.

"I dunno, she looks kinda outta it," said a voice with a distinct southern twang. "You okay there?"

I rose on all fours. I tried to stand, but it was like I simply could not flex the right muscles to pull myself up. All that happened was my numb hands rose in the air a few inches and fell back down with an odd clopping noise.

"What is she doing?" said the first voice.

I opened my eyes. My mouth fell open as I stared.

Four horse-like creatures stood before me, all staring at me. Well, three stood, one hovered. The cyan-furred rainbow-maned one had wings. So did the yellow creature with pink hair, but she was standing on the ground with the rest. At the front was an orange, wingless equine with blond hair and wearing a stetson. Another wingless one stood just behind her who was ... pink. Just pink with poofy hair.

"She looks scared," the yellow equine said.

The pink one stepped forward, smiling. "It's okay, we're not going to harm you."

"You all right?" asked the orange one. "Are ya hurt?"

My heart hammered. I tried to back up a step to put some space between us and nearly stumbled. I glanced down at myself.

Oh, dear God.

No, he couldn't have. He didn't.

I wasn't human anymore. I was like them. I was some sort of weird periwinkle blue equine creature. I picked up a ... foreleg. It ended in a hoof. I swallowed hard and looked behind me. I had a tail, colored a ridiculously bright cherry red streaked with equally ludicrous signal-flare orange.

I felt something move on my head. I lifted a hoof. My ears were on top of my head. This was surreal. I ... what? I had something sticking up from the middle of my forehead, like solid bone. Like ...

"Something wrong with yer horn?" said the orange creature.

My eyes widened. Horn? I was a unicorn? None of them were. Did I have wings, too? I looked at myself again. No wings. Thank God for small favors.

I looked back at them. They wore faces that were a mix of concern and confusion, save for the hovering cyan pegasus. She was frowning at me, her forelegs folded across her chest.

I lowered my hoof. "No, I'm not hurt."

What did I just speak? It wasn't English. It must have been their language. I guess I should have been grateful for being given that knowledge, but it was jarring nonetheless.

The cyan pegasus suddenly flew up to me, almost nose to ... I mean, muzzle to muzzle, causing me to flinch. "What were you doing in that apple grove?" she demanded.

"Rainbow, you're scaring her!" the yellow pegasus chided softly.

"What? It's just a simple question." The one called "Rainbow" frowned at me. "It oughta have a simple answer unless she's got something to hide!"

"Are you new to Ponyville?" the pink one asked.

I blinked. "Huh? P-Ponyville?"

"Uh-huh! I don't remember seeing you in town, and I know everypony!"

Unlike Rainbow, the pink ... pony ... seemed to be simply curious, even friendly. My mind was reeling too much for me to answer. Rainbow thrust a fore-hoof at me. "See, I knew it! So tell us, now! What were you doing in that apple grove?! You spying on us or something?"

I frowned and tensed. "Spying? I wasn't spying!"

"And what's that gold thing around your neck, huh?"

"It's just a piece of costume jewelry!"

"Then why does it have that, um, swirly-beard-star whatever-his-name-is on it?"

"What are you talking about ..." I trailed off when I glanced down at the pendant.

This was not the pendant I remembered. It was shaped the same, but it gleamed far more brightly, as if the faded fake gold plating had transmuted to real gold. Where it had been blank before, it now had a figure inscribed on it, a stylistic rendering of a unicorn with a beard and a star-filled cloak and pointed hat.

"I don't ... it's just ..." my mind stuttered.

"Yeah, I thought so! So tell us what you -- hey, let go!"

The orange mare had grabbed Rainbow's tail in her teeth and pulled her back. "I'd like a little word with ya."

Rainbow whirled around to face the orange mare."Well, go ahead."

"In private."

"But--!"

"Now!"

Rainbow clenched her teeth as the orange mare walked off. She flew after her friend until both drifted out of earshot, whereupon it appeared they had a rather animated discussion.

I took a deep breath and placed a hoof over my pendant as if feeling the need to protect it.

The yellow pony stepped closer to me. I felt a little more relaxed in her presence. Her timidity was a welcome contrast to Rainbow's brashness. "Please don't be upset with my friend Rainbow Dash," she said with a small smile. "She means well."

I slowly lowered my hoof. "Um, okay."

"Yeah, Dashie is really a sweetheart," said the pink pony. "Oh, and I'm Pinkie Pie!"

"And I'm Fluttershy," said the yellow pony.

"The earth pony with Dashie is Applejack. What's your name?"

"My name?" I said. "I'm ... uh ... I ..."

I swallowed hard. My heart thumped. I knew my name. Rachel Darrow. It had no translation into their language. I tried to sound it out in my old language, but nothing came out when I opened my mouth. It was like my brain had been rewired for the new language at the expense of the old.

I had not just had my humanity taken away from me, but my identity as well.

"Do you remember your name?" Fluttershy prompted in a concerned voice.

"Um ... no, I guess I don't," I said.

Both ponies gasped. "Oh, you poor thing," said Fluttershy.

"Are you sure you didn't hit your head?" Pinkie asked.

"I don't know," I said. "I don't think so, but ... I don't remember much of what happened."

I hated lying, especially just to garner their sympathy, but it was better than refusing to answer and letting Rainbow's suspicions spill over to the others. I needed time to understand where I was and how to fit in.

"Do you remember your parents?" Pinkie asked. "Are they around somewhere?"

"No, my parents ... are not around anymore. My mother passed on a few years ago and my father ... um ..." Did they even have concepts like marriage and divorce here? "He ... he's really far away, and I haven't seen him in a very long time."

"You've been living on your own?" said Pinkie.

"Yeah, pretty much."

"Oh, no! Who did your birthday parties then?"

I stared. Was she serious? "Er ... no one?"

"That's horrible! Nopony should have to go that long without a birthday party!"

She was serious.

Pinkie smiled. "At least you didn't miss your party for gaining your cutie mark."

"My what? Um ... uh ... I mean ... yes, of course."

Cutie mark?

Fluttershy scraped the ground with a fore-hoof. "Um, I better tell the others about her amnesia," she said before she turned away. Had I made her suspicious of me, too, somehow?

I watched her go. Only then did I notice the tattoo on her butt, that of three butterflies. Pinkie had one that was three balloons. Applejack had three apples. Rainbow had a cloud-and-lightning-bolt.

I glanced at myself. I had no such mark at all.

This was almost too insane to be believed. All that prevented me from thinking this was just a dream was that I would never come up with something as ludicrous as becoming a pastel pony with day-glo hair.

"Can I ask how old you are?" Pinkie asked.

I considered lying and stating I was older, but I had already pushed their credulity to the limit. "I'm sixteen."

"Oo, I thought so!"

"Is ... is that bad?"

"Not at all. In fact, it's wonderful! It means if you don't have any relatives who can take you in, you'll be fostered to a pony who won't miss celebrating your birthdays, and you won't have to live out on your own anymore with nopony to love and cuddle you." She wrapped her forelegs around herself as if hugging herself. "Isn't that great?"

I forced a smile. "Um, yeah, great."

Maybe someone else would have jumped at that chance, but that sort of arrangement was something I felt had passed me by a long time ago. If I couldn't have my mother or my best friend back, I wanted to be on my own. It was better for everyone that way.

I wanted to head off any more questions I couldn't answer yet. "Hey, um, Pinkie, can you tell me a little about Ponyville? Is it a large place?"

"Oh, no, it's a pretty small town," said Pinkie. "Not like the big cities of Manehattan or Baltimare."

Did she say ...? Good grief. Welcome to my puntastic pony adventure.

"I like it that way. It makes it so much easier to know everypony."

That's exactly what I did not want. I liked big cities because they were (usually) easier to lose oneself in. Or in this case, stay hidden from nosy ponies. Maybe if the big cities were not too far away, I could hitch a ride there.

If this world even had cars. If hitchhiking were not punishable by death.

"I'll bet you're from a big city!" Pinkie said.

"Why is that?"

"Because you got an eeeensie bit of a Manehattan accent."

What I had was a slight New York accent. I had lived there all my life until my mother died when I was thirteen.

"Does that ring any bells?" Pinkie asked.

"It might."

"Which bells?"

"Huh? I don't follow."

"There's this big clock tower in one part of Manehattan that has this really deep gong-like sound when it goes off. Then there's the tiny high-pitched bells of the little ice cream carts that zip down the main avenue at lunchtime. Then there's the big, brassy bells they use at the street festivals near the park."

"Um, what does that have to do with anything?" I asked.

"I thought if you could remember what bells you heard you'd know what part of Manehattan you came from!" Pinkie said, her smile widening.

That was ... almost logical, in a weird sort of way.

I caught motion out of the corner of my eye. First Rainbow then Fluttershy flew off before Applejack turned and trotted back over. "We're gonna get ya some help. We'll get ya to the hospital and have the doctors there look ya over and see if they can get yer memory back."

Having doctors poke and prod me was the last thing I wanted, but I had little choice. I smiled and nodded. "Thank you."

Dear God, what did I get myself into?

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Chapter 16 - Education

Spike threw the doors open with a flourish. "And this is the library!"

I refrained from mentioning that I had already seen this, but I had never really gone inside. I hesitated a moment before stepping across the threshold. Spike had mentioned this served as Twilight's second home; I felt a bit like I was trespassing on a private residence.

"This has nowhere near the number of books as the Golden Oak Library had," said Spike as he walked ahead. "But Twilight's on her way to filling it up."

I lifted my head. Shelves stretched upwards, far more than I could reach with my hooves. A tall ladder on wheels was attached to the shelves, but the rungs appeared spaced for Spike's feet rather than pony hooves.

"And the best thing of all," said Spike with a smile. "Is you can use it, and no one will bother you."

"Oh, um ... what?"

"You can stay here if you like, and look up anything you want. Absolutely anything."

My eyes darted over the shelves. My heart skipped a beat.

Wasn't this what I had wanted the other night, a trip to the library to try to understand this world better? Yet as I swept my gaze across the titles, I had no idea where to start. I could spend hours or even days in here and barely scratch the surface of what I needed to know. "Um ... well ... what about the rest of the tour?"

"This is the last stop," Spike declared. "I saved the best for last!"

The best? Better than the Cutie Map that helped determine destinies of friendship and had prompted Rarity into trying to foster me?

Dammit. All this knowledge at my hooves, but no better than if I had been dying of thirst and thrown into the middle of the ocean. But ... no, I had wanted to know only a single term: Element-bearer. Yet I faced the same problem. Where do I look? What subject was it under? History? Politics? Magic? Myth? Fashion?

"Do you need help?" said Spike.

I blinked and looked down. "Huh?"

Spike stepped up to me. "Would you like to read about something specific? Twilight's filing system is, um, a little arcane."

Maybe this was useless after all. What could knowledge of that term possibly matter now? What relevance did it have to my situation? Why go through the bother when I had a path forward? Chrysalis had given me all the information I needed. She gave me a time and a place. She had given me a way out. An escape.

Another escape.

I burned with a need to know regardless. Maybe I would understand Rarity better, if nothing else. I owed her that much for how terribly I had hurt her. Maybe Chrysalis was right about everypony else, but I had to ease my conscience at least that much before I left.

And again, I faced the same dilemma that plagued my quest for knowledge since I had arrived: I assumed everypony knew this already. I had to admit my ignorance. I had to take a risk.

I had to stop being a coward.

"Candy?"

"E-Element-bearer," I said in a quavering voice. "I ... I want to read about that."

Spike rubbed his chin as he stepped towards the ladder. "Hmm ... let's see ... Twilight had to nudge the magical publishers up in Canterlot to update their texts on that sort of thing. Not exactly just legend anymore, you know?"

I simply nodded, my heart pounding.

"Ah, I've got it!" Spike clambered up the ladder. He braced his left foot against a shelf and pushed, rolling his ladder to the right. He closed a claw around a thick book and pulled it out, holding it aloft. "This should do."

He waited.

"Um, Spike?" I said.

"Oops!" Spike said, blushing. "Sorry, kinda forgot you're still having magic problems." He slid down the ladder. He brought the book over to a table and set it down.

I trotted over. The title read: Compendium of Equestrian Arcana - Second Edition.

"That oughta do it," said Spike.

"Thank you," I said in a barely audible voice, still staring at the book.

Spike started to walk away. "Sooo, I'll just leave you to it, and I'll close the doors so you're not disturbed."

I climbed onto the seat before the book, turning my head towards the doors. I watched as they swung closed, leaving me alone. I took a deep breath, lifted my hooves, and opened the book. I flipped through it until I came to the proper entry, except ...

Element-Bearer - See Elements of Harmony

A few more page flips, and I was at the entry. I started to read ...

Elements of Harmony

The Elements of Harmony are a set of six magical artifacts in the form of precious gemstones. They are the arcane embodiment of Harmony, the powerful magic which, in part, keeps Equestria in balance and promotes friendship and good will throughout its lands.

Five of the gems represent the five Foundations of Harmony, namely Honesty, Kindness, Generosity, Loyalty, and Laughter. The sixth gem, Magic, is the means by which the other five are bound together and activated.

The Elements of Harmony originated from the Tree of Harmony. They were first retrieved from the Tree by Princess Celestia and Princess Luna during the First Reign of Discord. They subsequently utilized the tremendous power of the Elements to defeat Discord by encasing him in stone.

I paused.

These things had the power to turn living things to stone. Obviously it had not killed Discord or imprisoned him forever, or I wouldn't be here reading about it. If this had been Earth, this would have made a good legend, but in this world, stuff like this was real. They actually existed.

My heart thumped so hard my chest ached. I read on ...

After Discord's defeat, the Elements were housed in a special room in the Everfree Castle (also called The Castle of the Two Sisters). They sat largely unused until the unfortunate circumstances leading to Princess Luna's transformation into Nightmare Moon, and her attempt to impose eternal night upon Equestria.

Princess Luna did what now? So the creature which infested my dreams since I had arrived had been some sort of monster? Was this another valid reason for Chrysalis to oppose the alicorns? Should I trust anything Luna had ever said to me in--

No, stop.

I couldn't let myself be distracted. Princess Luna's past actions bore no relevance to me in the present. And ... Chrysalis had her say. I had to hear the other side. Both Rarity and Fluttershy were Element-bearers; I had to know what that meant and who they really were.

I swallowed hard and read on ...

When Princess Luna failed to listen to reason, her sister Princess Celestia was forced to utilize the Elements against her, resulting in Princess Luna's banishment to the moon for the following one thousand years.

During Princess Luna's banishment, knowledge of the Elements faded from the public eye and became known more as myth or legend rather than magical fact. Modern mages speculate it was during this time that Princess Celestia lost her connection to the Elements, but this is by no means certain.

Upon her return from banishment, Princess Luna, still in the form of Nightmare Moon, again attempted to impose eternal night upon Equestria during the Summer Sun Celebration. The Elements then fell to individual ponies to bear them (hence the term Element-bearer), each of which was believed to best embody the Element which chose them. The individual Element-bearers were:

Applejack - Element of Honesty

"Wh-what??" I croaked softly, staring.

No, this ... they couldn't be ...

Fluttershy - Element of Kindness
Rarity - Element of Generosity

Oh, dear God.

No, somehow, I knew. The moment I turned to this page and read what the Elements were, I knew. Maybe if I had read this before I had come to know them, I would have taken it with a grain of salt, but I had experienced Fluttershy's kindness and Rarity's generosity personally.

And I had stupidly tried to reject it.

I wiped my eyes and continued ...

Rainbow Dash - Element of Loyalty
Pinkamena Diane ("Pinkie") Pie - Element of Laughter
Twilight Sparkle - Element of Magic

Twilight had been sent to Ponyville to find the new Element-bearers without knowing the true nature of her mission. She nevertheless successfully found and helped unite those who came to embody the Elements of Harmony. She herself provided the spark of Magic via her friendship with the others to not only reconstitute the Elements after having been smashed by Nightmare Moon, but activate the Elements and utilize their combined power to defeat Nightmare Moon and begin the process of reforming Princess Luna.

This began the period when the Elements of Harmony were represented as jewelry, specifically necklaces for the five Foundations, and a tiara for Magic, the gemstones shaped like the corresponding bearer's cutie mark.

Later, the six Element-bearers were again called upon to defend Equestria, this time from the threat posed by Discord, who had escaped from his stone prison. They subsequently ended the Second Reign of Discord -- shorter by far than the First Reign -- by once again encasing him in stone. However, they later utilized the Elements to release Discord so that he may be reformed, a task which fell to Fluttershy, the Element of Kindness.

Eventually, the Elements were returned from whence they came, as their prolonged absence had weakened ...

The words blurred into a watery mess as faint splashes dotted the parchment. I shoved the book forward and dropped my face into my hooves. My sides shuddered as I sobbed.

I couldn't have just accepted their friendship at face value. No, I had to find out they were the goddamn living embodiment of virtue, that they were saviors of this world several times over. Only then did I dare to believe it. Yet Chrysalis' words still whispered insidiously in the back of my mind to lure me away from this revelation, to disregard it as more lies.

What the hell was wrong with me? Was I so horribly broken I couldn't let myself feel anything other than suspicion and fear? I still wanted to reject what I had read and retreat from their friendship. I still wanted to escape, to give up the pendant, to run away.

What had Chrysalis done to me?!

I laid my head on my crossed forelegs, tears spilling onto the table. No, I couldn't blame her, not completely. She had messed with my head somehow during our meeting despite all the supposed safeguards against it, but I had already messed with my own head aplenty. I had done most of the work for her, long before I ever came to Equestria.

I had believed that I didn't want or need friends, but that was never it. I believed I didn't deserve friends.

I sniffled and drew my head up. I wiped my eyes with trembling hooves. I had to fight not only Chrysalis' influence, but my own weakness. I could not tell where one ended and the other began. I had let my emotions descend to a level of chaos that would make Discord proud.

I took a deep breath to steady myself and climbed off the chair. My legs wobbled a bit. My body ached almost as much as my heart, and my thoughts were thick and sluggish from nothing that had to do with Chrysalis or her infernal influence over me. I shivered, my blood running cold at the idea of not just having had my mind messed with, but knowing it had been and still feeling like I could do little against it.

And yet, was I not fighting it now? Why would I be entertaining these notions if I had not managed to carve out some corner of my my mind free of the changeling queen's seductive words? Yet Strong Wing's words to me in my room--

I winced. Pain had again flared in my head, there and gone in a matter of seconds. Vague images of black shapes and green light flitted through my mind. I saw the apartment again. I felt a dam about to burst, but would the resulting flood clear my head or just drown me in more uncertainties and half-truths?

I stepped out of the library. "Dining hall," I said in a listless voice to my guards.

"Candy? Are you all right?" said Spike.

I sighed and closed my eyes, holding my head in my hooves as I sat at the table alone. I closed my eyes and resisted the urge to lash out at what had to be the most annoying and loaded question ever conceived. How many times had that same insipid question been asked in the wake of my mother's death?

I lowered my hooves to the cup of tea Spike had brought to me earlier before I had even asked. I had almost broken down into tears all over again at the simple act of kindness. "I'm not," I said in a soft voice. I lifted the cup and took a sip. "But there's nothing you can do about it."

"Oh. Well ... do you want some company?"

"Not right now, Spike, but thank you."

"Um, okay. Well, if you want me, just call."

After a pause, I heard his footfalls slowly retreat. I closed my eyes and let out a long sigh. Yes, very good: keep up the perfect record of pushing friends away. Seriously, there could not possibly be a more incompatible world for me than one based on harmony and friendship.

I closed my eyes and dipped my head at the sound of approaching hooves.

"May I join you, Candy Swirl?"

My head snapped up and turned. I swallowed hard as my eyes beheld Princess Luna standing in the doorway. Despite the soft and almost tired smile on her muzzle, my heart leapt into my throat, and I scrambled to get off the chair to bow properly.

Luna lifted a hoof. "Please, stay where you are." She trotted into the room and yawned. "I'm not at all formal this early in the day."

I nodded, not daring to trust my voice. My heart skipped a beat when she sat next to me.

Spike came rushing in. After a short bow, he said, "Up early for the summit, Princess?"

"All too early, Spike," said Luna with a small smile.

"Anything I can get you?"

"Just a cup of coffee, please."

"W-wait, did you just say coffee?" I blurted. "You have that here?"

"Well, it is the Princess' special blend that she sent down from Canterlot," Spike said.

"Oh," I said, my cheeks burning.

Luna smiled. "I would be quite pleased to share some with you, Candy. Spike, two cups, if you would."

"Coming right up!" Spike said. "How do you take yours, Candy?"

"Black," I said. "No sugar."

Spike nodded and scampered away.

"Thank you," I said softly to Luna.

"Coffee is not a beverage of choice in Ponyville, it would seem," said Luna. "I understand it once was, but apparently that ceased due to some incident involving Pinkie Pie. I know no more detail than that."

I smiled faintly. I had been right. Chalk one up for me for actually understanding something about this world. More so, it seemed, than I understood myself.

"I was told you have been living in the castle for a few days now," said Luna. "I hope you have found the experience enjoyable despite the events surrounding your pendant."

After a long pause, I lifted a hoof and placed it gently over the gleaming gold instrument of my failure across two worlds. Or was I being too hard on myself? So much grief I could have avoided had I chosen not to cling to my story of amnesia. "Maybe 'enjoyable' is not quite the right word."

"Oh? What would be more appropriate?"

I considered for a long moment, my thoughts still worming their way around half-truths and Chrysalis' bombast. "Enlightening," I said in a low voice.

Spike emerged from the kitchen. My drooping ears perked up a bit as the wonderful aroma tickled my nose. I pushed the tea aside as he slid the steaming mug before me. I stared down, watching the black liquid ripple slightly before closing my hooves around it and lifting it to my muzzle.

The small sip of what should be a familiar beverage still offered more surprises like everything else in this world. Subtle, unexpected nuances of flavor played over my tongue, and whether that was from equine senses or a fundamental difference in the coffee blend was irrelevant, because it was still coffee. I still enjoyed it, like many other experiences I had in Equestria. Why had I lost sight of that? How had I so diminished those experiences to the point of hurting ponies who only wanted to be my friend?

Luna took a sip of her own coffee, levitating the mug with her magic. "If I may ask, what sort of enlightenment did you come to?"

"That's a hard question to answer, Princess."

Luna looked thoughtful. "Then perhaps I should rephrase. Is there anything in particular you learned that stood out from the rest?"

"Yes ... I ... I don't know myself as well as I thought I did."

Luna nodded once. "That is a rather profound thing to learn about oneself."

"I d-don't know who or what I'm supposed to be."

"Interesting."

I swallowed hard. The words from the book flowed through my head. I had never seen the Elements of Harmony in action, but I could almost picture it anyway. "P-Princess ... I ... did ... did it hurt?"

Luna paused. "I'm sorry?"

"The Elements of Harmony. When Twilight a-and her friends used them against you. Did it hurt?"

Luna slowly lowered her mug to the table. "Now that, my dear Candy Swirl, is a most intriguing question," she said in a soft voice. "One that I don't believe has ever been asked of me before."

I sighed. "I'm sorry, you don't have to answer if it ..."

"It is a perfectly valid question, and one deserving of an answer. And the simple answer is ... yes. But nothing of this sort is ever simple."

"Nopony is no more aware of that than I am, Princess," I said in a quavering voice.

"Then perhaps you already understand that sometimes pain is necessary."

I remained silent and sipped my coffee.

"I made a mistake," said Luna. "I made a bad choice. I falsely believed it to be my only choice. No amount of talking, or of reasoning, or of debate would deter me."

I lowered my mug and stared at her. "But what drove you? Why did you do it?"

"I was driven by an emotional pain of my own creation which I refused to admit to those who would have listened, who would have helped."

"But you just said pain is necessary ... I-I don't understand."

"And that is where the answer is no longer simple," said Luna. "Pain can drive us to do things that normally we would never consider, Candy, and to take a path that, ideally, we would rightfully shun. Yet to turn from that path, no matter how dark it is, no matter how wrong it feels in our hearts, means we must admit our failings. We must admit we were wrong. That is never without pain."

My throat threatened to close up. I took a deep breath. "Princess, were you ever subjected to any ... to any sort of influence?"

"Influence?"

"Somepony wh-who told you what you wanted to hear," I said in a shaky voice. "Who played to your weakness. Who said they could take away all the pain if you just did what they said."

Luna was quiet for a long moment. "No, there was no such outside influence. I started down my dark path through my own faults. But had there been one such as you describe, in my vulnerable state before my transformation into Nightmare Moon, I would surely have listened. Eagerly. I sincerely doubt either myself or Equestria would have been better for it."

I stared down into my mug and blinked back renewed tears.

I heard a gentle rustle, and something soft had draped itself around me. My head rose, and I trembled as I realized it was her wing. She turned her soft gaze towards me and said, "And a pony who has been subjected to such influence and yet still questions, still seeks her own answers, still wonders if she is on the right path, is one of a strength of character I cannot help but admire."

Tears trickled down my face. "I don't feel like I'm s-somepony to admire. I did everything wrong! I didn't trust the ponies would could've helped me! I couldn't get out from under my past! ... Or my fear ..."

"And, yet, you came to this realization yourself," said Luna. She slowly smiled. "And you didn't need the Elements of Harmony used upon you."

I uttered a shaky laugh. "In a way, they were. That may sound crazy, but ..."

Luna drew her wing in and pulled me towards her. "However you received your enlightenment is not as important as its effect on you."

I trembled with the desire to give up all my anguish, to bury my face in her soft fur and cry my eyes out. Yet that would only be giving in to the pain and letting it continue to rule my actions. I could express my pent-up grief later. Any descent into emotionalism would give Chrysalis' influence more reign. Her offer still enticed me as a way to distill all my pain into a simple piece of jewelry that I could so easily shed.

I could not wait any longer. My new-found courage hung by a single thread.

"P-Princess," I murmured. "I-I need to tell you something about me. I-I'm not--"

Galloping hoof-beats approached from the hallway, drowning out my soft-spoken words. I drew myself from Luna's wing embrace as she turned her head towards the entrance. "Sister, what is it?"

I jerked my head around. Princess Celestia stood in the doorway, a frown creasing her muzzle. "We must make haste for the meeting hall, Luna."

Luna frowned and glanced at the clock. "It is still a full fifteen minutes before the scheduled start of the summit, Tia."

"Yes, but Queen Chrysalis has already arrived and is demanding the summit start now."

My heart leapt into my throat. I flinched hard when Luna clopped a fore-hoof on the table. "Does she truly wish to engage me before I have been sufficiently caffeinated?! Can we not tell her to cool her hooves until we are ready?"

"Normally, I would agree, sister, but Queen Chrysalis has been browbeating Twilight, and I suspect she is reaching the breaking point."

Luna sighed. "I had thought something more was amiss with Twilight than mere nerves over preparations for the summit. Perhaps we should call upon her friends to--"

"They are already here," said Celestia.

I stopped breathing for a moment.

Luna raised an eyebrow. "Indeed? As much as I hate to sound harsh, they have more sense than Twilight has been exhibiting lately." She slid off her chair. "I will be there shortly."

Celestia left, and I let go the breath I only realized then I had been holding. "W-wait, Princess Luna, please, I need to tell you something!"

"I am sorry, Candy, but I need to get to the summit."

I jumped down from the chair. "But--!"

"You can tell me later. I--"

"Chrysalis wants me to give her the pendant!"

Princess Luna stepped up to me. "I know."

My eyes widened. "You know?! And ... a-and you didn't say anything?! You didn't warn anypony?!"

"You have a decision to make, Candy Swirl."

I stared, my mouth open.

"The magic of your pendant is such that nopony can make it for you."

"But ... sh-she wants me at the summit ..." I said in a weak and helpless voice.

"Then I will be seeing you quite soon." Luna touched the tip of a wing to my shoulder. "Faith in your friends is always important, Candy, but not as important as faith in yourself."

I tried to speak, but no words would come to me.

Princess Luna withdrew her wing, smiled, and rushed out of the room.

I fell back onto my haunches, my heart thundering, and fought to hold onto that tiny thread of courage for just a little longer.

Author's Note

Last cliffhanger for this part of the story, I promise!

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