It Don't Matter if You Win by an Inch or a Mile...
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It Don't Matter if You Win by an Inch or a Mile...
“What?”
Raising her eyebrow, Sunset Shimmer stared over at her girlfriend, watching intently as Twilight adjusted her glasses.
“I’m taller,” the bookworm announced, a wide grin plastered on her face.
“What?” Sunset repeated. “No, you’re not. We’re the same height.”
The accused shorter of the two crossed her arms with an indignant huff. Noticing this, Twilight felt the need to inch closer. “Nope. I thought so too, but no. You’re definitely shorter.”
Humoring her girlfriend’s comment, Sunset stood up from her couch and paced over to Twilight. With a satisfied smirk, she brought her hand up, dropped it on Twilight's head and moved it horizontally over her own hair. "See, Twilight?" The confidence was practically nonexistent.
As if expecting this, Twilight Sparkle only hummed before staring down at Sunset’s legs skeptically. “Uh-huh. Take off your boots.”
Sunset recoiled. “What? Why?”
“Take ‘em off.”
Sunset crossed her arms. “At least tell me why.”
“You know why,” Twilight pressed.
“Is this some clever plan to see my feet?” Sunset asked, feeling the momentum in the argument swing in her direction as Twilight's eyes flared at the accusation. “Hey, whatever floats your boat. I don’t judge.”
“Yes, Sunset.” Twilight played along. “I wanted to see if you still had hooves under those boots.”
“Seriously?”
“Of course not,” the bookworm shot back. “Shoes off.”
“Alright, fine,” Sunset conceded. “Just make sure to take pictures for personal use.”
“What?”
“Nevermind.” Dramatically, Sunset pulled off her boots, held them up, and dropped them from chest height all while staring down Twilight with a competitive glare.
Returning the favor, Twilight marched over to Sunset and repeated the height measurement test Sunset used earlier. Only this time, Twilight was up by a solid three inches.
“See?” Twilight asked. “I’m taller.”
Refusing to accept defeat, Sunset bit her cheek. Grasping for any sort of leverage, she looked down at Twilight's legs and noticed the thick pair of shoes that used to be a part of her girlfriend's Crystal Prep uniform. “No fair! You still have your shoes on.”
At this point, Twilight knew she had the advantage. “It doesn’t matter, Sunny," she said. “You know my shoes aren’t anywhere near as tall as your boots.”
Humoring Sunset’s desperate plea for a redo, Twilight kicked off her clunky shoes. Once again, in the interest of getting a conclusive answer, they compared their heights again, standing back to back.
Twilight was up by an inch, which might as well have been a mile for the two.
"See, you're shorter," the now verified taller of the two concluded.
"Nuh-uh. This isn’t over, Sparkle." Sunset protested again, rushing out the room while murmuring, "I'll be right back."
Alone, Twilight glanced over at Sunset's high heeled boot, chuckling to herself at far the petty argument was going.
Waltzing back in, the former unicorn brandished a bright red washable marker. Jokingly, she presented it to Twilight, who giggled in return. Curtsying, the bookworm graciously accepted the marker and motioned for Sunset to stand against the wall.
“See?” Sunset asked, her back straight against the wall. “Same height, right. Problem solved.”
Twilight hummed. “Wait a minute. I just noticed something.”
“What?”
“Your poofy hair adds about an inch and a half.”
Sunset scowled. “So what?” she asked. “Hair is still me.”
“Well, in that case, I’m still taller,” Twilight said, pointing towards the bun at the top of her head.
“Fine whatever, just take the damn measurement.”
Twilight obliged and marked a tiny line right above Sunset’s head, making sure to press down on the curly hair.
“Okay done,” Twilight said. “My turn. Make a dot, so we don’t get it mixed up.” She handed off the marker and then proceeded to untie her hair, letting it all fall down past her shoulders. Smiling, she stood against the wall, almost content with the upcoming results.
Sunset only grimaced when she saw her line disappear behind Twilight’s head. “How about we just call it off?”
Twilight shook her head. “Too late, Sunset. You wanted to get the marker out.”
“Well, you started it.” Sunset grit her teeth and marked a small dot just above the back of Twilight’s head.
Moving away from the wall, the two inspected the lines. Twilight was taller by an unbiased total of two inches… And Sunset hated every millimeter of it.
“Face it, Sunset. You’re shorter,” Twilight concluded.
Sunset crossed her arms again. “I am not short!”
“I didn’t say short,” Twilight defended. “I said shorter.”
“Well whatever,” Sunset dismissed. “In Equestria, we would have been the same height. All the mares are the same height.”
“But we’re not in Equestria, are we?”
The former unicorn balled her fists. “What does it matter anyway? Humans wear shoes all the time. At school, rehearsals, out in public, I’ll be taller.”
Twilight giggled. “But you know,” she started. “You’re always going to have a nagging feeling in the back of your mind, always reminding you that I’m the taller one.”
“So what now?” Sunset asked. “What do we do now with this earth shattering revelation?”
“Well,” Twilight laughed. “You could try to stand on your toes and kiss me.”
“You know what?” Sunset shot back playfully. She stepped in closer, leaning in on the platforms of her feet until she was almost looming over her girlfriend. “I think I just might.”
In a quick, clumsy motion, the two tumbled over until they were on the ground. Their faces were close, and the two were staring into each other’s eyes. Sunset, blushing furiously, forced herself back up by pulling on the nearby coffee table.
“You know,” Sunset spoke up, “I’m already missing having you shorter than me.” There was another laugh from below before the fiery haired girl helped her partner up. “Oh well, I guess I can wait ‘til tomorrow at school when the natural balance of the universe is restored.”
“Fight me,” Twilight said, holding back a laugh.”
“Square up,” Sunset countered. Giggling, the two girls brought their fists up before dropping onto the nearby couch. “You’re not gonna let me forget this, are you, Twilight?”
“Noooope,” she hummed, adjusting her glasses.
“Well, you won this round. Enjoy it.” Sunset reached for the tv remote and switched it on.
“I will,” Twilight said, kicking her feet up on the coffee table.
Sunset did the same, still thinking about the half-argument. She looked over at her girlfriend who seemed to be nestled comfortably in the corner of the couch. The whole height debate seemed to have come out of nowhere. Still, Sunset could honestly say that the mild frustration she felt when her slight height deficiency became apparent was the worst part. It didn't take long for her to realize that it came from a slight feeling of inferiority that was standard from what was known as the Short Man's Complex.
Once the realization hit, Sunset couldn’t help but smirk victoriously.
“I’m curious, Twilight,” Sunset said. “What made you want to compare heights?”
Twilight blushed, “Well, nothing really. I just wanted to know.”
“Yeah sure, Twi,” she pressed, leaning in closer to her girlfriend. “There’s got to be a reason on why you were so hung up on height.”
“N-no, not really,” Twilight stammered. “I just noticed your boo-boots, and I thought about how you were just a tiiiiny bit taller than I was but not really.”
Sunset brought her head against Twilight’s shoulder. “Come on, Twily, you can tell me anything.” Confidently, she whispered in Twilight's ear. “You weren’t trying to compensate for something, were you?”
Twilight recoiled. “D-definitely not!”
“So you’re perfectly comfortable with your… ‘height?’”
Twilight's bright red face was all Sunset needed to claim victory.
“I am perfectly content with my height, Sunset. Thank you for asking.”
Sunset hummed. “And what about your chest size?”
