Pirates of the Caribbean: Into Equestria

by AJoltOfDapper

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Other, Adventure, Crossover, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Original Character
Length: 3880

Captain Jack Sparrow and his crew be ponies after escaping the dreaded Davy Jones Locker. Unfortunately, long time nemesis Hector Barbossa be trapped in Equestria with him.

Reading the first story is not required!

Captain Jack Sparrow, the captain of the Black Pearl, is trying to escape Davy Jones Locker when he somehow lands himself in Equestria, along with the rest of his crew and the unpredictable Captain Hector Barbosa. Now he must find a way home before things go from bad... to worse.
Meanwhile, twenty years after Operation: Final Wars, Onyx thinks he's finally settled down for an enjoyable life. But when strange events occur, he must keep his wife, Scarlet Blitz and daughter, Obsidia safe from the perils that lie ahead.

PLEASE NOTE: The first two chapters contain spoilers to "Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End!" Read at your OWN risk!

Captain Jack Sparrow® and other Pirates are trademarks of Disney.
All ponies from "My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic®" are trademarks of Hasbro.
Godzilla® is a trademark of Toho ltd.

Published 2016-01-06 08:40:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-06-01 13:53:53 UTC

"Now Rocks Are Following Us."

-The Black Pearl, Davy Jones Locker-

"HOIST THE SAILS!!" Captain Jack Sparrow yelled. "STEP LIVELY!" he continued with wide eyes. His eyes only grew wider as he drunkly marched down the Black Pearl's deck.

"Aye, Cap'n!" a Jack mirage acknowledged, saluting the real thing. The mirage proceeded to sprint to a tied rope. He untied it, allowing the sail to fly open.

Captain Sparrow grabbed a rope and leapt off of his ship. His dirty hands ran along the thick material as he landed on solid ground. "That's interesting." he muttered to himself, staring down at the pure white crust. Nothing but vast white ground could be seen for miles.

Jack spun his feet so that he faced the other direction. It was the same that way as well. It was then that he noticed a smooth speckled stone in front of him. Captain Jack Sparrow grabbed the rock off of the ground and lifted an eyebrow. It was almost flat, but rounded off.

The pirate stared hard at the stone's rounded edge. He then, without hesitation, ran his tongue along it's edge. Not seeing anything strange about the stone, he threw with all of his might.

Sparrow then trudged to his ship and grabbed the robe that e had used to get down. With that, he noticed that the rock appeared in front of him. He wasted no time in seizing it and casting the stone away.

"Now rocks are following us... Interesting." Captain Jack muttered taking the rope to the front of the ship.

It was very clear that Jack was... struggling. No matter how hard the drunken pirate tried, he couldn't make the Pearl move an inch. He looked down at his feet and saw it. Another stone.

"Or the same one." he whispered swinging around. Sure enough the rock he threw earlier had vanished. Jack lifted the hard mineral off of the bleached ground and threw it again.

The ship's captain still tried to move it... but to no result. In exhaustion, Captain Sparrow collapsed under the blazing sun's heat.

When Captain Jack awoke, his ship was moving... without any water to push it along. A look of confusion crossed the pirate lord's face as he stared at the ship.

It was then that he realized that he wasn't ON the ship. "WAIT!" he shouted, running after the Black Pearl as fast as his legs would carry him. "WAIT FOR ME! AAH!!"

-The Outskirts of Ponyville-

The dirty grey stallion slowly walked up the dirt driveway, a saddlebag on his back and his mind fixed on the family that he would come home to. His older brother silently walked alongside him.

The two brothers finally saw it. A long trailer with a shed and a couple tent garages around. Onyx's daughter, Obsidia, came to greet him with a gentle hung. "Hi." Onyx said.

"Hi, Dad." Obsidia said, wrapping her arms around her father.

"Hey, baby, Where's your mother?" Onyx asked, looking around.

"She's inside fixing dinner." the light brown pegasus answered, pointing at the trailer.

"I'm home!" Onyx called into the kitchen with a smile on his face. "How was your day?" the stallion asked Scarlet Blitz as she came to greet him.

"It was alright." she told the Earth pony, wrapping her arms around him and planting a kiss on his cheek. "How was YOUR's?" she continued, gazing into his bright eyes.

"Ah, the boss was in one of his moods again." Onyx said, waving a hoof like it didn't matter.

"Oh." Scarlet said with an honest glare. "You know... Sometimes I could just strangle that pony." she growled, motioning her hooves as if she had them around the stallion's neck.

"Yeah." Onyx muttered, rolling his eyes.

Escape From Davy Jones Locker

-Davy Jones Locker-

Captain Barbosa stared at the tall sand dunes, his pirate hat shading his eyes from the hot sun. "He be close now." he muttered. "I got a feelin' of it." he continued, slowly walking up the shoreline.

"Aye." Mister Gibbs said with a slight smile. "Agreed."

"Where, is the question." William Turner mumbled, squinting at the hills of sand before him.

It was then that the bowsprit of a ship came into view, followed by the rest of what appeared to be the Black Pearl. And there, standing on the crow's nest, was Captain Jack Sparrow himself.

"Ha ha!" Mister Gibbs laughed joyfully as the ship came down the sand dune like it would on a wave. The massive boat was being carried by hundreds of white crabs.

Slowly, the Black Pearl was gently carried into the water. Captain Jack Sparrow leapt from the ship onto the warm beach, his boots leaving deep imprints. Everybody was dead silent for several moments. "There wasn't even a single drop of rum." the pirate exclaimed with disappointment.

With that, the crew erupted into cheering. All except for Hector Barbosa, who was doing his best to hold his tongue.

Everybody was now aboard the ship and working, doing their best to make the Black Pearl look good. Captain Jack Sparrow, however, was studying a strange map. It was circular, and old, but still useful. The pirate lord, squinted with confusion and turned a piece of the map until it lined up. Written toward the bottom was this message; "Up is down? That is utterly useless!" Sparrow declared.

It was then that he noticed a ship in the center of the map. It was upside down, the ship itself below the water. "Up is down." he repeated quizzically. "Up is DOWN! Sun down! Sun up!" Captain Jack Sparrow promptly lifted from his seat and realized what the map was referring to.

"Hey! What's that?!" Jack yelled, running to the side of the ship. He was followed by Mister Gibbs. Barbosa only watched in confusion as Sparrow, his long time enemy, ran back and forth like a maniac. Hector then realized why the drunken pirate was doing so.

"He be trying to get us out of here." Captain Barbosa whispered to himself as the ship rocked back and forth.

"LOOSE THE CARGO!!" Hector Barbosa commanded, hacking at the ropes holding the precious items with a hatchet. The heavy, steel cannons rolled back and forth as the ship began to rock more and more steeply. "Ha, ha!" the once undead pirate yelled as he raced to the upper deck.

Two of the pirates approached each other with wide eyes. One of them, a one eyed fellow with a replacement glass eye, lifted a thick rope and pointed to one of the ship's masts. "I got an idea." he said to his balding comrade.

Within a matter of minutes, the two had tied themselves upside down to a mast. "This better work." the bald pirate growled.

"A brilliant pirate you be, Jack!" Mister Gibbs declared.

"Yes I know. But now may not be the time for explaining something I have already come to find out... Savvy?" Captain Sparrow said, not stopping to run to one side of the ship. The next run was enough completely tip the Black Pearl. Everybody on the ship hung for dear life to one of the ship's edges.

Only one man didn't make it. The pirate fell to the other side, saved by a net caught between him and the water. Unfortunately, a cannon that had been loosed fell on top of him.

"Oooh." Mister Gibbs groaned, turning his head away from the crushed man.

Suddenly, the ship completely flipped. Every person held their breath and waited for the sun to disappear from the horizon. It was then that a flash of green light could be seen. The ocean's surface then rushed down to meet the ship and it's residents.

Captain Jack Sparrow gasped for breath, his mouth wide open as water poured off of the Black Pearl's deck. "A brilliant pirate you be, Cap'n." Gibbs coughed. Captain Sparrow turned to see the fellow pirate only to be utterly startled. "AAGGHH!!!" Sparrow yelled. "KEEP AWAY, YOU MUTANT DONKEY!!" he shouted, pulling his sword from it's sheath.

"AHH! What have you done to Jack?!" Mister Gibbs yelled, pointing at Sparrow. It was then that Mister Gibbs noticed that he didn't have hands anymore... They were hooves. With that, the pirate fainted.

-Outskirts of Ponyville-

Onyx laid on the sofa, snoring lightly. Ratchet swiftly entered the room and slapped the sleeping stallion with a news paper. Onyx woke and angrily began to yell at his older brother. "WHAT THE HECK WAS THAT FOR?!!" he roared, jumping to his hooves.

Ratchet only dropped the paper on his lap. "Read it." he commanded.

Onyx angrily snatched the paper from his lap and began to scan over the front page. "Strange, seabound ponies destroy Canterlot's finest ships." he read. "What do I have to do with it?!" he growled at Ratchet through clenched teeth. "You woke me for, for THIS?"

"I'm getting a feeling that YOU are going to be requested by Celestia." Ratchet replied.

"Oh... Fair enough." Onyx muttered.

"Dad! Can you come outside with me?!" Obsidia called in the hallway.

"Not right now, baby! I'm busy at the moment!" her father replied. He then turned to Ratchet. "I don't see what the big deal is. Godzilla is one thing... Strange ponies are a completely different story." the first time parent told his older brother.

-Canterlot's NEW Castle-

Princess Celestia gracefully walked down the castle's long hallway. Her mind fixed on the strange ponies that took down an entire fleet of her best ships.
-It's probably those foolish pirates that I freed from jail a few years back- she thought to herself, rolling her eyes at the thought.

-Atlantic Ocean-

"Stay back, you demonic donkey!" Captain Jack Sparrow yelled at the pony, Mister Gibbs. "I'm warning ye! Stay BACK!" With that, the pirate swung his sword in a desperate attempt to shoo the pony away.

"Cap'n! It's ME, Mister Gibbs! And have you seen yerself! Yer also a horse!" Gibbs yelled at the pirate lord, pointing at him with his new hooves. Captain Sparrow stopped dead in his tracks and looked down at himself.

"AAAHH!!" he shouted, startling his comrade as he leapt into the air with shock.

"Calm yerself!!" Captain Hector Barbosa yelled, pulling a heavy pistol from his holster and firing it three times into the air. "Listen here, ya pile of whale fat! We need to stay calm and collected or BLEAH!" he continued, sliding a hoof across his throat and letting his tongue hang from his mouth.

Jack stared at the captain like he had seaweed crawling out of his ears.

"What ye be gawkin at?!" Hector growled.

"I'm looking at your horribly deformed face. Have you seen yourself?" Captain Sparrow replied. That was all Barbosa could take. With a loud roar, he charged the pirate lord and put his hooves around his neck. "GAK!!" Sparrow choked, his tongue hanging from his mouth.

"BOTH of you! Knock it off!" William Turner yelled, pulling the two pirate's apart. Captain Barbosa pulled his gun from it's holster and held it to Turner's head. He then pulled another one out and held that to Sparrow's head.

Captain Jack repeated the process and eventually, almost the entire crew had their guns held to each other's head.

Suddenly, the tension was broken. "Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!" Barbosa laughed.

"Ha ha." Jack began, lowering his gun. Everypony else followed.

Hector immediately stopped laughing and lifted his guns. "Sorry, Jack. Yer life be endin here." With that, he pulled the trigger. Drops of water squirted from the short barrel. Within seconds, everypony had pulled their trigger, but only to find that they didn't work.

"Wet gun powder." Mister Gibbs grumbled, holstering his own weapon.

"Well then." Jack Sparrow said drunkly. "We might as well get along." Hector rolled his eyes.

Pirates of the Canterlot Dungeon

-Canterlot-

Captain Jack Sparrow stuck his head around the corner of a building. His mustache twitched as he thought of what to do. The plan was to find the riches, but personally, the pirate lord wanted nothing more than a few bottles of rum.

"Okay! We gooo... THIS WAY!!" he explained, running to another corner, a group of his crew following close behind. "Stop!" Jack Sparrow whispered. "The Red Coats..." he continued with a slight grimace, spotting a celestial armored pony with a lance leaning against a gate.

Applejack walked down the kingdom's long streets toward her home on the Zap Apple Orchards. She was on her way home from a counsel with Princess Celestia to inform Onyx, an old acquaintance of hers, about the destruction of Equestria's finest ships. Applejack hadn't paid much attention to the meeting, however.

Suddenly, a flare of light momentarily blinded her. Rubbing the blindness away, the element cautiously scanned the area. She shrugged her shoulders and turned to walk home.

She was stopped, mid step, by the sight of an oddly dressed bunch of ponies in her path. A pony with a hat, mustache, and boots stopped dead in his tracks as Applejack stared at him, slightly confused. "Howdy!" she exclaimed approaching the stallion.

"AAAHH!!" he shouted in surprise... "ABANDON SHIP!!" the stallion yelled running away as if his life depended on it.

"Wait! Hold on for just and apple pickin' second! I didn't mean ya any harm!" she called after the pony, lifting a confused brow "What in the name of Celestia?" she asked herself as she ran after then.

It was then that Rainbow Dash appeared next to her. "Hey, Jackie!" she said, waving her hoof at the pony with the grin. "Where's the fire?" she continued, noting the earth mare's exasperated expression

"Did you just see them, there ponies?" Applejack said, pointing at the group.

"I wouldn't pay too much attention to them." Rainbow Dash acknowledged with a grin. "Speakin' of, I should probably go tell Onyx 'bout them pirates." she continued. "Well... See ya!" With that, Rainbow Dash vanished just as fast as she had come.

-Outskirts of Ponyville-

The sound of a loud knocking on the door accompanied by the sound of Rainbow Dash's voice forced Onyx to leave the table. "I'll get it." he grumbled, rising from his seat. Swinging the front door open, he spotted the familiar sight of cyan blue and rainbow clad across a pegasus mare. "Hey... RD," he said. "Come on in," the stallion continued, holding the door open for the feisty teenager.

"Thank you, Mister Onyx," she pipped up, neatly folding her wings as she went to the table. A cheery smile crossed her face as she saw the family. "Hello, Scarlet!" she said to the white pegasus.

"Mm, hello." the red and white mare acknowledged with a nod.

"Well if it isn't ol' Rocket Butt," Ratchet growled. Scarlet Blitz shot the mechanic a glare. With a gulp, he said; "I-I mean... You're really fast, no?"

"Yep!" the cyan pegasus replied as she cracked a grin. Onyx then entered the room and took his seat next to Scarlet Blitz at the dinner table.

"So! What brings you to these parts, friend?" Onyx asked. "Surely, it must be important if your coming all the way from Canterlot," the stallion continued.

Rainbow Dash pondered for a moment, seemingly forgetting what she had come for. "Oh, yeah!" she exclaimed. "Princess Celestia wanted me to tell you to get your tail over to Canterlot ASAP." she told him matter of factly.

Onyx stared at the young pegasus like she had three heads. "Well aren't YOU a little demanding." he growled at Rainbow Dash with a frown on his face.

"Sorry." she grimaced. "But, anyway, Princess Celestia wants you at the castle because of pirates." Rainbow continued as if nothing had happened.

"SEE!! I TOLD you that Celestia would want to see you!!" Ratchet blurted at his brother.

With a loud sigh, Onyx placed his hooves against his head. "I can't just leave my family!" he told the teenager pegasus. "You're gonna have to find somepony else to help you."

"Why don't we come with you?" Scarlet suggested. "Obsidia would love to be at the castle. She's never been there before." On cue, Obsidia's ears flicked up.

"Fine!" his father said at last. "But just keep in mind that I'm not getting myself caught up in any battles like the Godzilla one, alright?" he growled.

"Yes, Sir!" Rainbow Dash said, instantly placing a hoof to her forehead and preparing to launch back to the castle.

"PLEASE!! Not in the house!" Scarlet Blitz said, putting a hoof up to stop the cyan pegasus. With a roll of the eyes, Rainbow Dash nodded that she understood and left.

-Canterlot Castle-

Captain Jack Sparrow snuck inside of Canterlot's castle, his mind fixed on finding a good bottle of rum, or two... or maybe three. Most likely three.

With that, the pirate lord began to slam his hoof into the marble floor, searching for a secret hatch or opening of some kind, as he had done when marooned on an island with Elizabeth Swan.

"HEY!! You there!" a voice called. Captain Sparrow looked up and spotted a 'British' pony approaching him. "What do you think you're doing?!"

"Well, hello there, deformed donkey! I am... RUNNING AWAY!!!" With that, Jack turned to leave, only to be stopped by a different pony. Soon, the entire group of pirate's was surrounded by 'British' guards. "That was unexpected." Sparrow muttered with wide eyes. He then tried to distract the guards. "HEY! What's that?!" With that, the pirate lord turned tail and tried to run, only for a guard to grab his coat collar and pin him to the ground effortlessly.

"What do you ponies want?!" the armored stallion growled at Captain Sparrow.

"I was just trying to find the RUM!!" he replied with wide eyes.

"We'll see what Princess Celestia has to say about that, THEIF!" he growled, lifting Jack to his feet and putting chains around his shins. The guard was surprisingly strong.

"What be yer plan now, Jack?" Mister Gibbs whispered into the drunken pirate's ear.

"SHUT UP!!" a guard pony commanded, yanking on the chains around Gibbs' neck.

"GAK!" the stallion choked.

"Nice job, Sparrow." Captain Hector Barbosa growled to himself. He instantly wished he hadn't when Jack brought a hoof to the back of his head.

"That's CAPTAIN Sparrow, to you. Savvy?" he corrected.

"I said SHUT UP!!!" the guard yelled, pulling a sword from a metal sheath and bringing it to Captain Jack's neck. The pirate lord rolled his eyes and grimaced.

"They always get angry when I try to find the rum." he muttered to him self.

"Who Are You?"

-Canterlot Dungeon-

Guards tramped back and forth, keeping close eyes on the pirates locked up in almost all of the cells. Captain Hector Barbosa quietly growled to himself at Captain Sparrow's longing for alcohol that got them all locked up in the first place. Mister Gibbs could only look at his new body in disgust and confusion, wondering why the heck he was a horse with clothes now.

As for the drunk pirate lord himself, he pushed the bars of his cell, searching for a weak spot in the iron door. Defeat overtook him, and Captain Jack Sparrow let himself fall back on his haunches, a flat expression sketched across his muzzle. His ears lifted up as an idea dawned on him.

"Ahoy! Can I appeal to your not so brutal side with a single statement?" he asked, his characteristic, drunk demeanor not so appealing to the guards.

"No." one guard replied flatly, not a hint of respect for the pirate lord on his tone. "Now shut up." he ordered.

"Right. But before I shut up, I would like to ask ye a simple question..." he paused for a breath of air. "Why is it that I be in a world whose the home of a bunch of donkeys?" Sparrow asked, squinting his eyes for a moment.

"What?!" the guard asked, becoming enraged at the word "donkeys."

"Would you kindly let me out so that I can find the rum." Jack then asked, ignoring the guards' anger and pointing at a bundle of keys hung on a wall hook. Hector Barbosa rolled his eyes and snorted in irritation and disgust, his undecided ally still trying to get his hands, er... Hooves on a bottle of rum.

It was at that moment when a tall, elegant unicorn mare with wings entered the corridor, followed by a navy blue pegasus with a similarly colored helm. "Your Majesty!" the angered guard exclaimed, swiftly bowing his head to the monarch. His fury seemed to melt away as Princess Celestia uttered a reassuring chuckle before lifting a hoof. The guard remained in his position.

"You may rise." the alicorn told the guard with a soft smile, turning to the Black Pearl's captain. Captain Barbosa lifted himself to his new hooves and approached the door of his cell, interest in the so called monarch catching him by surprise.

Mister Gibbs gulped down a breath of air in worry, partially for his leader, and partially for himself.

"Who are you?" the monarch's calm voice asked. The drunk pirate lord lifted a hoof to respond but found himself devoid of words. He opened his mouth, furrowing his eyebrows in confusion as he fought to reply.

"We are not from here." William Turner answered for Captain Jack, noticing his mute expression. "We come from a place where horses are not citizens, but means of transportation." he continued, trying his best to avoid angering Princess Celestia and getting the crew into even more trouble. Captain Jack Sparrow nodded in agreement, still trying to gather the courage to speak.

"You do not need to worry about angering me. I do not anger easily... Please, go on." the celestial alicorn reassured with a chuckle.

"We where simply trying to get home when our ship, the Black Pearl somehow landed in unfamiliar territory. We come from a place called Earth." Turner continued with a nod of appreciation.

"Who are you?" Princess Celestia asked, lifting an eyebrow. Commander Hurricane was surprisingly quiet throughout the majority of the conversation, only speaking to ask the occasional question.

"I am William Turner. This is Captain Jack Sparrow. Over there is Mister Gibbs and Captain Hector Barbosa." Will replied, pointing at Gibbs and Barbosa's cells.

"I see... By your dress and slang, am I correct in assuming that you are pirates?" she asked.

"As you ask these questions, I have been thinking to myself... Who are YOU?" Sparrow finally said, his eyes wide with the last "you" in the question.

"I am the monarch of this land. My name is Princess Celestia and without me, the sun would not rise. I am an alicorn, if you must know, and have the power to have you all executed." Hector cried out a retort, along with Mister Gibbs, before Celestia could say anything more. "But, I am no tyrannical monarch. So having you all killed should not be a worry to you all. However, punishment for attempted robbery is in order. And, one more thing... What is it that you were all after?" she asked.

"The rum." Captain Jack Sparrow, drunken pirate lord replied.