Tales of a Germane

by lurchie0815

Rating: teen
Tags: Other, Comedy, Slice of Life, Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 10964

Did you ever wonder how ponies from other nations than equestria would see the life of the ponies there? Well, in this story Franz Siegmann, a pony from Germaney, will tell you the story of his youth, how he came to his life in Ponyville and what he experienced there.
At this point I've to say that due to the fact that I'm german, my english is probably not so good at all, so don't mind if I make some mistakes.

Published 2012-06-08 14:24:02 UTC
Last updated 2012-08-13 20:49:24 UTC

Chapter 1

Chapter one

Hello there! My name is Franz Siegmann and I'm from Germaney. You probably never heard about it, in fact the most people haven't, so I'll tell you something about it before I start my personal story. But before we start all this, I probably tell you a little about myself. I live in Ponyville for a couple of years now, since I came here to work as....well, I think I'll tell you that later. Anyway, I'm a 29 year old unicorn, not really tall, not really small, grey fur, black short mane and blue eyes. And that's quite everything you need to know for now.

Germaney is located northeast of Equestria. It was founded a few after years after princess Luna was send to the moon. In this time, a bigger demodratic movement grew in Equestria (mostly out of the former Luna supporters) because in the opinion of those ponies Celestia had too much power in her hoofs, ruling all alone. As satisfied as a few ponies were with these modern ideas, the princess wasn't. The democrats were persecuted in all of Equestria and in the end the ones who weren't killed or send to jail went out of Equestria to form their own state. They went up in the northeast and founded a couple of cities, wich soon formed the state of Germaney. Apparently, Celestia didn't like her new neighbour, but her attempt to conquer this new state failed from the beginnig on. After she definitely lost the war (the Germane army stood in front of Canterlot), she signed a peace contract wich guaranteed the independence of Germaney. From this time on the leaders always said our freedom and independence can just be kept by a strog military (you will later see why this is important). Even though the diplomatic relations between our two nations have always been a little...well....complicated, the current relations are quite good, Equetria even made an arrengement with Germaney to improve their own military.
Wich leads us back to my own story.

I was born in Mareburg as son of a factory worker. My mother died in a car accident when I was about two years old. Even though my dad tried to be a good one (and he really was), I guess living in the poorer parts of a town does probably not make a good character out of you. I got in trouble all the time, no matter where I was. Once I just ran into a brawl were two bullies from my school were just about to beat one of my friends up. They ended up in the hospital with broken bones and I got grounded for two weeks. Another time, when I went to a shop nearby my home where apparently was a robbery. In fact I was the only one who called for help, wich was probably not the best idea according to the fact that the police did not care about this part of the town at all and I got nearly shot, but I feelt like that I did the right thing. But in fact, all this made me a rather good fighter. I got my cutie mark when I was about ten years old and teached one of my few friends how to kick somebody in the face to make him unconscious.(don't think bad of me, I don't have a cold heart, it's just that it is important to defend yourself in such parts of the town) It showed a stallion, teaching another one how to handle a gun. I was surprised, happy and frightened at the same time. I mean, well, I knew I was a quite good fighter, but I never expected it to be my special talent to teach other ponies how to use weapons and kill each other. On the other hoof I had my cutie mark at that's at least what all colts and fillys are looking forward to. But I feared how my father would react to it, and even more when he would ask me how I got it. Even though we had some trouble at this day, he learned to deal with it.

When I was in the legal age of eightteen I joined the army and quite soon became a drill instructor. Working as in drill instructor was my dream job at all. I mean
1. You can randomly yell at persons you don't like without reason
2. You can watch them doing everything you order them to do and
3. You see how they change (I know this sounds weird compared to the things I mentioned before, but for some reason I just feel happy when I see how these guys turn from normal people into real soldiers).

But in fact, I still had some trouble, it was just like somebody wanted me to ran into it.
It was a beautifull summer day when the Hauptmann (the chief of the base) called me into his office to talk about one particular recruit. The Hauptmann was a stuck up asshole with a light brown fur, yellow eyes and brown hair who rated recruits just on their stamina and accuracy and the shooting range, without actually seeing them. The recruit we were talking about was not in the right condition and not as a accurate as he would have to be. The problem was that I didn't send home yet, because he had the enthusiasm you need to bring yourself through whatever comes upon you. Too bad this was not important to the Hauptmann.

"Rekrut Gutknecht is maybe not the fittest of the bunch, but he has the right attitude and a very good morale and I'm certain he will make it if we give..."I coudn't even finish my sentence before the Hauptmann already interrupted me.
"Shut up, Feldwebel Siegmann, I've heard enough of this the past week, he is not fit enough and therefore he will go home!"
"But...."
"No more "But", Feldwebel, I appreciate how you care about your recruits, but in this case my decision is clear. You may go now."
"Sorry I've to talk with you that way sir, but you have absolutely no idea what you are talking about. You never even saw one of them anytime and you want to rate them with statistics and graphs, but it is much more than this. Their attitude is at least as much important as their condition, maybe even more important. And to be honest, do you really want to doubt a instructor, who has an instructor-cutie mark?" Fuck, I really never learned how to behave in such situations. I really always had to say what I thought, luckily, I learned to improve my self control soon after that, but in fact, the way I think did not change at all.
The Hauptmann went red and seemed to explode."You may better leave now, Feldwebel", he said silently.

I went back to my office and thought about what just happend. I had talked to my, if you want so, boss in a way wich was probably not the best to talk to superiors and I could call myself a really lucky stallion if I would keep my job. This night I did not sleep very well. I thought of what my dad would say, because even though he did not like what I would become in the first place, but later he was rather proud to call his son the "youngest drill instructor in all of Germaney". I thought of how disappointed he would be, his son losing his job just because of an unnecessary discussion. At the end, I finally got some sleep. As I woke up in the morning I did not feel so well. Not because of I hadn't much sleep, I was used to this, but because I feared what would happen to me. It was friday wich usually is an off day for the instructors of my group. So I just sat in my office and waited for whatever would come.

At about one p.m., the adjutant of the Hautmann came to my office. "Good morning, Feldwebel"
"Good morning"
"I got good news and not so good news."
"What's the good news?"
"You can keep your job."
"And the not so good news?"
"You may heard about the new arrengement to improve the Equestrain military?"
"Yes, I did."(I already could imagine where this would get me......)
"You volunteerd for as military advisor for the REA (Royal Euquestrian Army), and according to your wish you will be send there. All other informations are in this folder. Goodbye"
"Bye"

He laid a a folder on my desk before he left the office. I had to sit down for a second and think about everything. Well, I still had my job and that was great, but working as military advisor in EQUESTRIA? According to what I heard their military was probably the worst on this planet. Not that I would wonder, at least we are talking about a state wich you also could call the "United States of love and toleration". I opened the older. First there was a letter:

"Hello dear volunteer, (very funny)

First of all, we thank you for your confidence in our southern ally and your wish to improve their power to keep us all save. You will, according to your wish (why do they have to repeat this always?), be based in a military base somewhere in Equestria. You can read where exactly you will be send in the documents wich are also in this folder.
Your main tasks will be to help to improve the REA in the areas training and equipment. Further instructions are in the folder.

The ministry of defence"

Great, now I wanted to see wich place fate had chosen for me. "Ponyville? Where is this supposed to be?" I looked it up on a map. "Great, right in the middle. Let's hope that at least I don't have too much work there" Suddenly I saw a train ticket in the folder.

From Mareburg to Ponyville
Mareburg central station 10.06.12 at 14:03

"What? Tomorow?" Dammit, the Haupmann wasn't losing any time to get rid of me.
I spent the last hours of the day with packing my stuff (not that it was so much) and wirting a letter to my dad about what happend to me (not mentioning the argument between me and the Hauptmann, but telling him that it was some kind of promotion). I also got myself a book about Equestria wich just improved my worst fears. What I saw didn't look like an actual state, but more like a photo of candyland. That night I had nightmare like I never had it before. I was stuck in an colorfull village full of colorfull ponies (not that that would be so bad), with an pink pony jumping after me no matter where I went and offering cupcakes to me. In the beginnig it was just awkward, but soon it became quite scary. In the end I was runnig like a hydra would stand right behind me, but I couldn't shake her.
As I woke up in my own sweat it was about 9:00 a.m. . "Alright, time to get up". After my usual morning (taking a shower, dress myself, eating breakfast) I took my belongings and went out of my office, the base and right to the central staion.

"Punctual as always", I moaned as my train came into the station."Ok Ponyville, here I go" I said as I entered the train into my new live.

Chapter 2

Chapter two

The train ride was long and not very comfortable. Obviously the Ministry of Defence didn't thought that something better than economy class was in need for an military advisor. I spent most of my time reading the book about Equestria that I bought myself one day ago. It was not very interesting, only the part about the so called "Elements of Harmony" captured my attention. It said something about how important friendship is in Equestria and that with the power of this friendship the elements could defeat any threat. Well, maybe I didn't read it that carefully. But either way, I didn't believed in their power. I mean seriously: If you read about something like that in the first place, would you belive in it? Somewhere in the chapter about Equestrian national food, I finally slept in. I woke up as somepony shook my shoulder.
"Sir, I'm really sorry to interrupt your sleep, but this is the final station of this train and therefore you have to get out"
"WHAT? FINAL STATION? WHERE AM I ?"
"You are in Canterlot, and according to your ticket this is the right station for you to get out."
"Oh, ehm, sorry then mister"(maybe I should have read through the ticket instead of this sleep-in-assistant, probably this would have been even more interesting)

I got out of the train, went to the platform where I had to go and waited for my connecting train. What arrived about ten minutes later was not a train at all, but more a bad joke. It looked like it escaped out of a little girls toybox. As I looked around, I recognized that this probably was indeed candyland. All buildings I could see were colorful just like their inhabitants and everyone had a quite weird smile on his face (I wonder if they never get any cramps). Anyway, I went into the train (wich apparently was more comfortable than the one I was in before, even though it was still economy class). This time I spent the ride not with reading, but looking at the countryside instead. At this place I have to admit that the countryside was quite nice, though the trees looked like cotton cany stuck on chocolate sticks. Finally, in the early evening I arrived in Ponyville.

As I got out of the train, the first thing I did was looking around. Ponyville looked like you would imagine a small town on the land, so nothing special at all (At this point I've to say that I already became used to the "Girl-TV show-look" of everything). But then she appeared. She looked like she just jumped out of the mind of a five year old girl with her pink fur and pink cotton candy mane. She walked straight towards me and before I could even say a word she sarted trying to drown me in a waterfall of words.
"Hello! Who are you? My name is Pinkie Pie! Welcome to Ponyville! Oh, oh I've a idea! Let's make a "Welcome-to-Ponyville-new-guy-Party", I really like parties do you know? Well, throwing parties is my special talent at all, so I have to like them I mean it would be really bad if would throw parties for everyone without liking them, don't you think so?....."
It was amazing. Only one minute after I met her, I already didn't like her. I don't know exactly why, but I think it's because even in such a "We will love and tolerate the shit out of you nation" like this, there is always somebody you don't like. Maybe it was just because of my nightmare.
Anyway, if I wouldn't have turned the part of my brain responsible for listening off after one minute, I probably would have been able to feel how my brain slowly melts away. When her mouth stopped moving five minutes later, I took my oppurtunity.
"Well, hello ehm...what was it?"
"Pinkie Pie. Well, in fact my name is Pinkamina Diane Pie. But all of my friends call me Pinkie. Do you want to be my friend? I...."
"Yeah, whatever, ehm Pinkie, can you tell the way to the...wait, I just have to look it up...Ponyville barracks?"
"Of course I can, but why would anypony wan't to go there, I mean it's grey and everybody is so super-duper-serious and..."
"Yes I know that just tell me the way!" I answered, nearly shouting because she became rather annoying.
"You have to, WAIT, I've another idea, how about I lead you there so we can talk?"
"I guess I've no other option?"
"No" she said with a weird grin on her face. We started walking.
"So what's your name? You still didn't tell me." She started.
"I'm Franz Siegmann."
"That's a silly name." (said the pony with the probably most obvious name in the history of everything)
"What? Where I come from it's a totally normal name. At all, I would call your name silly!"
"Where are you from?"she asked, like she didn't heard anything.
"Well, I'm from Mareburg in Germaney."
"Uhhh, so you are one of those super-serious-advisors?"
"Indeed"

It carried on like this about twenty minutes, until we finally arrived at the Ponyville barracks, wich turned out to be on the western edge of Ponyville.
"So here we are Mister super-duper serious, see you later on your welcome party!"
"How did you just call me? I don't want a party at all! Hey, where are you?"
She just disappeard. If she wouldn't look like she could vomit rainbows, she would be a rather good Spec-Ops-Soldier.

Chapter 3

Chapter three

After I went into the barracks I walked into my new office and looked at my new room. It was more colorful than my old office and the bed in my room was way more comfortable than the one in Germaney. I putted on my uniform ( A green coat with 2 golden lines on each shoulder and a red beret ) and intented to go to the base commander to speak about the general drill and the equipment. Apparently, fate had other plans for me. When I opend the door, I looked into a grinning pink face. I jumped back with a small scream.
"Uuuahh, where do YOU come from again? I mean this is restricted area! How did you get here?"
"Does this reall matter Franzy-Danzy? I just wanted to inform you about your welcome party, because I thought you might forget it. But as I can see you already disguised yourself. Well, though, I didn't plan to make a costume party, but I can change this without a problem. So, do you come?"
It took myself a few seconds to clear my mind.
"Hello, Franzy? Is everyth..."
"Yes, I'm alright and first of all: DON'T CALL ME FRANZY-DANZY! Second: This is not a costume, this is my gosh darn uniform!
And third: I'll not go to this stupid party."
"Ok, Mr. super serious, but I think the readers will be really disappointed if you don't go there. And think about the author! He did plan it this way so what if you force him to change evrything? This would be a lot of work and..."
At this point I turned the listening part of my brain off again and thought. First: This pony was totally crazy. And second: I indeed didn't went to a party for a long time, and seriously, how bad can the situation is this base be? I think I could need some distraction. Again, I waited until her mouth stopped moving and then started to talk.
"Ok, I thought about it Pinkie. If you leave alone in the future, I'll go to your party."
"That's great, come on Franzy!"
"Don't call me this name again, Pinkie, and don't even think about creating an other one for me! Did you hear me? No more nicknames."
"Oky doky lokey"
At one day, I swear, I would kill her.

Apparently, the party turned out to be quite nice. There were a lot of guests, and everypony was curious about Germaney, my job, my town and so on. The food also was very good. You can say a lot of things about Pinkie, but her cupcakes are probably the best I've ever eaten in my life (At all I wonder why all of the ponies there don't have diabetes, I mean they probably eat as much sweets as other food). Later in the evening, Pinkie introduced me to her friends (or better to say, to her best friends, because apparently she made friends with everpony in the town).
Twilight Sparkle, she was kind of a bookworm and permanently asked me quetions about Germaney, wich was a little annoying. But at all she was nice and, most important, more serious than Pinkie (Well, probably everybody was).
Rarity, she was also quite nice and had a very good sense for fashion ("Oh darling, this is probably the most impressive uniform I've evern seen... She also added quite a lot of designer-language-stuff, but I did not understand anything of it, so I did listen to it very carefully). She also was quite reserved, wich I also appreciated.
Fluttershy, I didn't got a good impression of her, maybe because it took me about half an hour to start a small conversation where I also coudn't understand every second word. At all it didn't seem that she spoke much (really big plus).
Applejack, she was also ok even though her accent made talking not so easy in the beginning.
And last, Rainbow Dash. It looked like she was born in the wrong body (If you know what I mean) and she was quite childish (at least I would call somepony childish whose main vocabulary consists the words awesome and cool). But for some reason, I found her rather sympatic.

Later , I and Rainbow had a talk.
"Hi again Franz."
"Oh, hi, ehmm, Rainbow?"
"Yes, that's true."(Akward silence)"So, you are from Germaney?"
"I think so."
"How is it over there? I heard you got tanks there. Man, these things are SO awesome!"
"Well, we got some indeed and I've to admit they are rather, how would you say it, cool."
(Silence again)
"I heard you are drill instructor, tell me, what do you do at all?"
"Well, my job is to train recruits to turn them from guys like you and me into soldiers."
"So you are some kind of trainer?"
"Yes, you got it."
"That's cool, because I'm looking for a trainer to improve my flight skills. You know, I already am quite good, but I need a little more training to become able to join the Wonderbolts, you know."
"Excuse me, but the what?"
"The Wonderbolts, of course! Did you never hear of them?"
"No, not really"
What followed was an explaniation, wich definitely overused the words cool and awesome. But I understood that the Wonderbolts were some kind of elite-flyer-group and that Rainbow really wanted to join them.
"So, I wanted to ask you if you could help me, you know, as trainer."
On one side, I wanted to accept because I somehow liked her. But the last thing I could need know was a tomboy, using me to accoplish her dreams. Everything I wanted was to bring this whole thing behind me as fast as possible and to go back to Mareburg.
"Well, I have to see, at least I got some work to do here and I fear I probably will not have much time for you."
"Ok" She sighed and looked a little sad as she walked away. Ok, I knew I was not the friendliest guy at all, but was this too hard? I couldn't think about it much, because I heard a voice calling
"Hey Franz, you said to me that you would talk with me about the Germane political system later and according to the normal definition of later, wich in fact is about ten minutes, you can talk about it with me now..." Ok, this Twilight became really annoying. And according to MY definiton of later, I had to get somewhere else.

At all, the party was quite good. It was so good that I forgot about the time while I tried to avoid Twilight (wich was not very hard) and Pinkie (wich turned out to be practically impossible). So when I got back to the base at 3 p.m., the commander was expecting me for some reason.
"Hello mister Siegmann, my adjutant told me you arrived earlier, where have you been?"(Fuck)
"Well, hello first mister...."
"Rough Spear (hahahaha), but I prefer R.S.(why ever)"
"Well then, R.S., I was busy with important things, ehhmmm, equipment and stuff, you know."
"Until 3 p.m.?"
"Well, yes it ,ehh, turned out to be more comlicated than I epected, you know. Anyway, I suggest we make the muster tomorrow morning right after the breakfast, so I can get an impression of the troops."
"Just as you want, but you better get some sleep now."
"That's not such a big deal, I'm used to less. Good night."
"Good night"

I soon slept in, but before that I just thought about everything. I would get this soon behind me, and than it would be back to Mareburg. I mean, seriously, how much work can this be?

Chapter 4

Chapter 4

I got up at 8 p.m. (wich apparently is a very generous time for a soldier to get up), pulled on my uniform, took a clipboard with a paper and a pen with me and went to the barrack yard. On the yard stood about 80 soldiers including the officers (Probably this was a small base). All of them wore the same golden uniform (wich seemed to be take right out of the medival time) and were ,for some reason, all white pegasi or grey unicorns who were carring spears. I walked to the commander.

"Good morning, sir."
"Good morning, Mr. Siegmann. Well, as you can see, this is the whole staff of this base."
"Ok. Well, it's nice that everybody is wearing his gala uniform, but I would like to see the troops with their actual combat equipment."
"That is the actual combat equipment. And I have to admit, the ponyville company is of the best in all of Equestria."
"So you mean you have no firearms, bulletproof jackets, wireless comunication devices, camo suits and so on?"
"No, but if I can ask a question, what are all these things you were just talking about? In fact, I've to admit that in my opinion there is now real point in all this, I mean, we got the Elements of Harmony and all that, why should we increase our military power that much? But that is only my opinion." (I have to say, in one point we had indeed the same opinion. There was really no point in this whole thing.)

I took a small not on my clipboard

Things that have to be changed

FUCKING EVERYTHING

"What are you doing, Mr. Siegmann?"
"Oh, nothing special, I just took a note, but I fear that because of you have no proper equipment, I will not be able to start my work today. I'll write a letter to the ministry of defence, tell them about the situation and order advanced equipment. Until then, I think, we have to wait."

So I went to my office, took a paper and began to write.

Dear ministry of defence,

The situation is even worse than I expected. Not that the troops have no suitable equipment, they even never heard about it. Before I don't get any proper equipment I can't continue my work.

Ponyville military advisor
Franz Siegmann

I went to the post station and gave them the letter. Now I had nothing to do. Not that I would care much about it, it didn't felt like I was lazing, more I did everything I could for now and it wasn't my fault that this was not really much.
I decided to go to the city of Ponyville, at least I would have to stay here for a quite long time (exept these soldiers would learn to use their equipment in a really short time, but I wasn't really confident about that). The city was quite nice at all. It had some stores, a market place with some booths and a bakery (or some kind of that), apparently the place where my welcome party took place, wich was called Sugarcube Corner. Because I was a little hungry, and had nothing better to do at all, I went inside.
Big mistake. I just looked directly into the face of the pink grinning devil.

"Hello Franz, nice to see you again."(At least she called me with my actual name)
"Ohoho, hey there Pinkie, what are you doing here?"
"I'm working here."(Does she always grin?)
"Oh, ehm, well then, I just wanted to look a little around in the town and well, apparently I haven't seen anything yet so, ehhmmm, see you later."
"Oky doky"

I went out of Sugarcube Corner as fast as I could without looking like I was trying to escape.
As I wandered trough the town I recognized (to my amazement) that a couple of pegasi were pushing clouds around to clear the sky. Further I recognized that one of the pegasi was Rainbow Dash wich I just met yesterday. Because I was interested in what she was doing and because I felt a little guilty for my dismissive behavior last night, I began to talk with her.

"Hey Rainbow"
"Oh, hi Franz, how are you doin?"
"Nice, thanks, tell me, what are doing here? I never saw this before."
"Well, we are puhing the clouds away from the sky so everybody has a nice day."
"That's pretty generous of you."
"In fact, it is our job."
"Really?"
"Yes, as chief of the Ponyville weather patrol it is my job to make the weather whatever the pegasi in Cloudsdale want it to be like."
"So, you control the weather?"
"Sure, you don't?"
"No, not really, mostly all of our pegasi work in the airforce....."
"What are you doing here anyway? Don't you got work to do?"
"Well, apparently the equipment here is so outdated that I can't work with it. So I have to wait until I get proper equipment wich I can work with."
"So, does this mean you have nothing to do at all?"
"No, not really."
"That's great! Now you can help me with my training! Oh, ehm, if you want, of course."
I fought with myself. On one side I didn't plan to and I didn't wanted to make me some extra work I hadn't to do. But on the other hoof I had probably plenty of time, nothing to do and I somehow, I really don't know why, I liked her.
"Well, why not."
"Really? That's SO AWESOME! I'll meet you at Sweet Apple Acres in ten minutes, ok?"
"Don't you have any work to do? I mean there are still some clouds in the sky."
"That's not a big deal. If I want I can clear the sky in ten seconds flat."
"If you say so..."

Before I could ask her anymore questions, she flew away.
Apparently, I didn't know where or what Sweet Apple Acres (who creates all this names?) was at all. But fortunately, it wasn't a long way to the market place. As I arrived there, I saw Applejack (wich I also met yesterday) with a market wagon and obviuosly selling apples. Because I didn't knew somepony else there I walked to her.

"Hey there, ehm, was it Applejack?"
"Howdy partner. Yes, Ah'm Applejack."
"Well, could you be so nice to tell me the way to Sweet Apple Acres? If you know it, of course."
"Of course Ah know, Ah'm livin there!"
"Oh, that's great, now tell me, what's the way?"
"In fact, Ah got a little problem here and it would be really nice from ya to help me."
"Apparently I'm a little in hurry, but what is it?"
"Well, you can see this wagon. This mornin muh brother Big Macintosh helped me to bring it here, but apparently he can't be here now cause he has to watch my sister Applebloom and Ah didn't sold as much apples as I hoped and now I fear this wagon is to heavy fo me to bring it back alone."
"So you want me to help you to bring it back?"
"Exactly partner. Of course I would give you some of the finest Apple-family-food I got as reward."
At this place I recognized how hungry I actually was. Furthermore I'm not used to refuse a mares wish.
"Ok, I'll help you"

As a pair, it took us 20 minutes to bring the wagon from Ponyville to Sweet Apple Acres. Even though I was a trained soldier, I was not used to push such heavy charges. Anyhow, I had a quite interesting talk with Apllejack. I learned that she lived together with her sister, her brother and her grandmother at Sweet Apple Acres, but that she in fact had about fifty relatives in all of Equestria (Wich apparently all had names that were related to the word apple in some way. Looks like the parents in this family have to be rather creative when it's about creating names).

When we arrived at Sweet Apple Acres, a napping rainbow Dash was alrady expecting us, or better to say, me. But once I came close to her, she woke up.

"Oh, you are also here, Mr. Higspeed?"
"Is this the usual way you talk to a trainer of yours?" I asked with my well trained drill instructor voice.
"I-I didn't meant it that way" She said, as suddenly snaped to attention. (It really works with everypony)
"No problem. Well, you said I should meet you here to beginn your training, so, what next?"
"You may use the western field, we don't use it in the moment." Applejack suddenly said.
"And as I still own ya the food I promised to you I suggest I come to you in about two hours to give you all a little snack."
"Sounds nice to me." I answered.

Training with Rainbow Dash was quite fun, but since I didn't know much about flying and flying tricks and so on, Rainbow had to explain more things to me in the first place than I had to explain her. The only thing where I could help he at all were the stamina exercises.
Before I knew it, Applejack came by with an cart full of apple pie, cider, and a lot other apple dishes, one of them looking more delecious than the other. After a really tasty and long "snack", I noticed that it was already dawn.

"Excuse me, but I have to go now, somebody is may expecting me in the base, but if you want we can meet here again at the same time tomorrow, Rainbow. Until then I probably have had the possibility to learn a little more about this whole flying thing."
"Of course we can! See you then."
"Well, then, see you tomorrow."
"Cya partner."

With these words I left Sweet Aplle Acres. And I've to admit, even though this, well, happy look of everything was still unfamiliar to me, I somehow started to like this whole thing for some reason. But I definitely can't tell you why.

Chapter 6

Chapter six

Within the next days, I went to the commander to clarify everything about the training with the new equipment.
"So, we got a storeroom for the equipment?"
"Yes, we do."
"Perfect, do we have a military training area or something like that?"
"I fear not...(I groaned)...but I think there could be a possibility!"
"And that would be...."
"Well, there is a big open field with a forrest nearby, right on the edge to everfree forrest."
"Wonderful, let's take it."
"But there could be a problem..."
"What kind of problem?"
"Well, apparently, this area does belong to somepony."
"Oh, I see. Who is it?"
"Do you know Fluttershy?"
"Yes, I do."
"Well, she owns this area."
"Ok. Well, apparently I know her, and the my training partner Rainbow Dash told me some storys about her. She seems to be very kind, so I think that I maybe could make an arrangement."
"Well, good luck then."

2 hours later, I stood in front of Fluttershys cottage. It was a little nice house with all kinds of animals wandering around it. I went to to the house and knocked at the door. To my surprise, a little white bunny opened.
"Hello there little guy, I need to talk to Fluttershy (Gosh I love it when I make ryhmes without doing it on purpose), is she home?"

The bunny pointed into the house.

"Thank you kindly."

As I walked into the living room I saw the yellow pegasus, apparently feeding some animals in the moment. I cleared my throat.
The pegasus boggled and turned around, still a little trembeling.

"Hello Fluttershy. Do I disturb ?"
"N-no. It's fine" She answered, almost inaudible.
"Well, I'm here because I heard you own a rather big piece of land near everfree forrest. In fact, I still need a proper training area and I wanted to ask if..."

Before I could finish my sentence a fire began to grew in her eyes and she said:
"Try to take my land and soon you will face your end!"

With these words she turned around and kicked me in the face. I faltered, but i didn't fell. Instead I moved back getting in a defensive position and not minding my nose, wich probably was broken. But instead of an angry pegasus wich was jsut about to attack me gain, I looked at a little yellow something wich was buryin her face in her hoofs.

"Is everything alright?" I asked (Damn, she should ask me that!)

Her answer was a little squeak.

"Why did you do this to me?" I tried again.
"Oh, I'm SO sorry, mister. I didn't wanted to do this, you have to belive me! But I've been to a seminar about self-confidence quite a long time ago. I really tried to get these phrases out of my head, but sometimes I backdrop."

I remebered a story from Rainbow dash about Fluttershy and one so called "Iron Will". So I came back to business.

"Well, as I said, we need this area as training ground and I would be pleased if you could borrow us this area. Of course we would reward you in some way."
"Well, if you need it so badly....I guess I own you one."
"For what?"(Not that I couldn't imagine...)
"Your....nose."

I touched my nose with my hoof, just to move it away immediately as pain bursted through my body. My hoof (And the floor, too)was stained with blood.

"Guess you are right. Thank you anyway."
"Shouldn't we take care of that? I mean I could without problems, you can't imagine what kind of injuries my animals sometimes get." (Oh, believe me, now that I know you, I can)
"Yes, of course, that would be really nice."

Twenty minutes later, my nose was completely patched up and I went back to the base.
As I arrived there, the commander already expected me.
"Hello there, oh my goodnees, what happend to you?"
"Don't ask, but I have good news, we got the training ground." (Sometimes I feel like those ponies should be much more grateful to me than they actually are)

The next days I spend with supervisig the preparations of the training area wich ment diging trenches, positioning targets, building assault courses and so on. It's interesting to watch an untrained group of soldiers trying to dig a trench, but it's also kinda sad. In fact, somhow, the area was ready for the military exercises after a few days.

After a few more days the equipment arrived (Punctual as always, just like the Germane standart). Apparently, Rarity somehow made it to finish the work on the camouflage suits long before the agreed deadline, so I could start training the soldiers the next day. I and Rainbow celebrated our last training (Or better to say, last training for a good long time) with probably too much cups of cider. At least, I had a horrible headache the next morning.

The soldiers didn't prove themself any better. Well, according to my experince nobody can handle a gun perfectly at the first time, but these guys were...let's say, something special. But on the other side, I shouldn't expect something better from somebody who has never heard about a firearm before.

When I first demonstrated how to handle a gun, nearly all of them cringed when I fired the first shot. When it was time for them to shoot, it didn't became any better. The unicorns hadn't so much problems, apparently because these kinds of weapons are designed for unicorns. I still don't understand why they are desinged that way. I heard some crazy theories why, but this is another topic.

Apparently, it took about half a day to find a proper way for the pegasi to use the guns (Holding them up with one hoof and pulling the trigger with the tongue). This does not mean that their accuracy increased in some way (No, not at all). I mean, yes the recoil can be unexpected strong, but I still wonder how you can shoot a bird flying in a sixty degree angle above you, when you are supposed to shoot at a target directly ahead on the ground (I buried the bird on the training area without mentioning it to Fluttershy, I did't had the urge to get another kick in my face).

After the first day I summed the results of the training up and began to write a letter to the ministry of defence:

Dear ministry of defence,

The training with the new equipment has started today and if I survive the drill of the recruits, I think it will be finished in at least two months.

Ponyville military advisor,
Franz Siegmann

Man, these are probably about to be the longest two months I ever had. And the most dangerous two months as well.

Chapter 7

Chapter seven

I trained the soldiers for one week now. For being that inexperinced and from time to time clumsy, they made unexpected big proceedings. Nearly all of them could now handle a firearm without endaring me or anyone else. And we had only five injuries in this week, and only one them was really dangerous. All in all, a rather big success. But as usual, there was no light without shadow.
At beginning of the weekend I realized that I apparently forgot my textbooks about ballistics and weapon handling in mareburg. Now I was hamstrung. I couldn't go back to Mareburg and get them, and sending a letter to the ministry would probably cause some unpleasant questions. The only option I had was to go to the library and hope that they had such books there for some reason (Wich I wasn't really confident about).

So I went to the library the next day. It was a sunny day (Rainbow did a really good job) and usually I would have spend my time with sitting in a cafe and reading the newspaper or something like this, but I had bigger problems than caring about my leisure. Even though I already had been to the library (Because of the books about flying that I borrowed for the training with Rainbow) I still wondered why it was tree, or better to say, why the tree still was alive. I mean I don't know so much about biology but I suppose that building a house into it isn't that good for a tree. Anyway, I went inside.

Inside I met Twilight Sparkle and, to my surprise, Rainbow Dash.
"Hello Franz" Twilight said.
"Hey Franz, what's up?" Rainbow said as she walked closer to me "That was a awesome party last week. It felt like a had a headache even two days after it. At least it felt to me this way." She said with a wink.
"Well, it was pretty nice though." I answered "Even though I have to admit that you probably can't take so much."
"What do you mean by this? Do want to say that I would loose a drinking contest agianst you?"
"Kinda, yeah."
"Pff, you would totally loose, but if you want to challenge me we can clarify this here and now, and I tell you..."
"Rainbow, my inventories are not open to debate!" Twilight suddenly said.
"Oh, ehmm, I mean I don't have any, you know.......ehmmmm, let's forget everything I said." Rainbow and I looked startled at her. Then suddenly Rainbow bursted out into laughing, so I took my oppurtunity.
"How ever, the reason why I am here has nothing to do with drinking at all. In fact, I wondered if you got some books about ballistics and weapon handling, because I also need to train the recruits in these areas. Apparently, I forgot my books about these topics in my hometown Mareburg."
"Well, I fear I don't have any (I moaned, but seriously, what did I expect?).....But I have another idea!"
"And that would be...."
"As I still lived in Canterlot I once was bored because I had nothing to do, so I read some books about these topics wich where in the Royal Library for some reason."
"So you suggest that I go there to get some..."
"No, not at all! My idea is that I train your in these areas, so you have nothing else to do and can re-establish your training with Rainbow, because she just told me how much she is missing it."
"Hey, that's not what I said!" Rainbow suddenly interrupted us.
"Of course it is! You just said to me...." Thwilight tried to answer, but Rainbow interrupted her.
"It's not important what I said! But, well, it would be nice if you could train with me again....."

I was indecisive. Work that I don't have to do is always good, and for some reason I really missed our training sessions, so I was tempted to accept.

"I'm tempted to accept your generous offer, but I have to assume there is also a condition to this offer."
"Well, there is one condition indeed."
"And that would be...."
"Well, we are having the General Ponyville Meeting in two days and because you seem to be a quite good organizer in general, I would like you to go here with me because I maybe could need a supporting voice in some topics."
"If it's nothing more: Of course I accpet!"
"Great. As I said, the meeting is in two days. The topics we will discuss there are randomly choosen, so it's not necessary to prepare yourself in any way, just because it's not possible. You just build your own opinion on the topics we discuss there or in case of you have no idea what to say or do, just follow my opinion."
"Ok, I'll keep that in mind. Oh, and thank you of course! I would be grateful if you could begin advising the recruits tomorrow because that's what I actually planed."
"Of course, and thank you."

I turned to Rainbow again who apparently gained control of herself again.
"You heard it, Rainbow. Until tomorrow there will be no more napping at midday. There is no point in training if you don't contiune it." I said with a wink.
She, what I totally did not expect, blushed.
"Well, yes, I probably have to admit that you are right."
"But only probably."
"Well, see you then, Franz."
"Yeah, see you Rainbow. And Twilight, too, of course. Thank you again. Bye!"
"Bye Franz."

As I walked out of library I felt like I made the best deal of my life. I mean: I had someone who was taking the work of probably one and a half month away from me and simultaneously gave me the opportunity to train with Rainbow again, on what I really looked forward to. And I mean, going to a meeting, hell, how much work can this be?

As usual, I was wrong. Again.

It all began already when I was about to enter the meeting, wich took place in the Ponyville townhall. Not that only ponies like Twilight Sparkle or the major mare came, but also for some reason Ditzy Doo and, even worse, Pinkie Pie. Before I could dig myself into the ground or commit sucide, she already walked to me and began to talk.

"Hey Franz! Haven't seen you for a while." (The best time of my life, I've to admit.)
"Hi Pinkie, well you are probably right..."
"Not just probably, I'm right you silly."

"Oh, in the name of everything, please kill me." I thought by myself as I entered the hall together with the others.

The meeting started punctal at 3 o'clock. At first, a purple pony whose cutie mark showed a bunch of grapes and a strawberry walked on the podium.

"Hello, I'm Berry Punch and I would like to start the first topic today: It's about the cider production of Sweet Apple Acres: It's definitely too low!"
"Yeah, they always run out!" A caramel-colored pony claimed.
Pretty much everypony else started approving this thesis and it all became a not even remotly comprehensible something, as a particular voice started to talk.
"Hey,ya folks realy love hatin the Apple family for that, don't cha?Seriously, ya all know we do everrything we can to produce even more cide every year, but we also have limits! And all of you know what happend when these Flim-Flam brothers came!"
"There has to be a way!" Berry Punch claimed and soon it became the same chaos it was before.
"Twlight, don't you want to say something to them?"
"Actually, no. This topic is not of interest to me, so I just do nothing."
"Interesting."
I looked around. The meeting had become a giant battle, everyone for his own, except the ones who didn't care.
"Is it always like this?"
"Pretty much, yes."
"I see..."
It went on a minute like this. Then I just couldn't hold myslef anymore.
"EVERYPONY JUST SHUT UP! We are here to solve our actual problems and we won't do so if we keep arguing about the same thing all the time. And since it seems I'm the only pony here who is interested in solving these problems, we will do this by my rules! This means five minutes talking time and this only after you putted your hoof up and thought about what you were going to say. And there will be no whispering and ABSOULUTELY NO TALKING OVER THE LIMIT!

Everpony was immediatly silent and just looked at me. One second later they all stormed back to their seats. Once everything was peaceful again, I putted on my winning smile. Finally one pony putted his hoof up.

"I recognize......Ditzy Doo..." I said with a tone of disbelief.
"Muffins!"

That was all Ditzy said. Oh my goodness, what had I done?

Five hours later the probably longest meeting of my life ended. Now I finally could look forward to some training sessions with Rainbow. But as usual, fate had also other plans.

Chapter 8

Chapter 8

It went on good for quite a long time. The recruits were no more a deadly threat to me or anypony else, my training with Rainbow went on and I didn't meet Pinkie once in this period. All in all was it by far the best time I had in Ponyville so far. But everything has to come to an end.
It was a normal saturday and I sat in cafe reading the newspaper as usual as Applejack approched me. Nothing bad so far.
"Hey there partner."
"Hello."
"Watch'a doin?"
"Reading the newspaper and relaxing."
"Sounds good."
"It is, but I'm sure you're here to talk with me about the weather or something like that."
"That's right, actually ah have a question."
"And that would be?"
"Well, we've a barn we don't use anymore and ah would like to ask ya if ya could help me take it down."
"When?"
"Within the next days, the faster the better."
"Well, I see. And I have an offer to you."
"Fire away."
"Would it be possible to use it as training ground for a few days? After that I would let them take down this thing in no time."
"Well....yah know what? Sounds good, ah accept."
"Great. But before I start using it I've to check it out."
"No problem partner, ya can check it out right now if ya want to."
"Sounds good, let's go."

Twenty minutes later I was inspecting the barn. It was clapped-out and probably would have given every aesthetician an immediate heart attack and slow and painful death. In other words, it was the perfect traing ground. Well, probably not if you want to train to climb roofs, but perfect to teach the recruits some basic urban warfare.

Everything was perfect and I would have called myself a smart cookie for making such an agreement, but then they appeared. Not that I've something against kids in general, I just like them to be as far away from me as possible, or at least not to bother me with their stuff. These three girls were the complete opposite.

I was drinking some cider as I thought about how to make a training area out of this ruin when I heard them. I didn't pay attention to them, but according to what they usually speak about it was about their cutie marks. At all, I first recognized them after I heard one of them clearing her throat for the, well I guess it was the fourth time.
As I turned around I saw the three girls examining myself. Finally, the yellow one began to talk.
"Hey, who ah you?"
"My name is Franz, and who are?"
"Muh name is Applebloom. What are you doing here?"
I thought a second about my answer. Telling threee little girls what my job here was about was probably not the best idea, you never know how people react, especially over here.
"Well, I'm helping your sister to take down the barn."
"So ya are this guard guy muh sister was talkin 'bout?"
"Probably, yes."
Their eyes, to my dismay, widened. The orange one with the purple mane jumped out of the group.
"That's great! You can help us get our cuie marks!" (It was then when I recognized that they all were blank flanks)
"Well, even though I'm a trainer and this idea seems resonable...." I took a sip of my cider.
"What do think girls? Cutie mark crusaders infatry platoon?" I had a cough attack because my whole sip came into my windpipe.
"Hey hey hey, I don't think this is a good idea....." I said after nearly dying.
"But why? We want to earn our cutie marks and what if our special talent is too be soldiers!?"
"Well, I mean....there are much more things that you could try instead!"
"But we want to try this now!"

If you now think "It can't get worse", don't underestimate fates sense of humor.
Just in this moment, Applejack came by.

"Ah see ya already met muh sister Applebloom."
"Well, yes...." I said with a desperate look.
"He's going to help us earning our cutie marks!"
"That's great! What do ya wan't to try?"
"Soldiers!"
Applejacks facial expresion changed immediately and I would have facehoofed, but in this case a facehoof was just not enough and unfortunately there was no mountain nearby.
"What did ya just say?"
"We are going to be the CMC infantry platoon!"
"What in tarnation?"
"This was not my idea! They came up with this....idea! I swear you I've nothing to do with!" Usually I don't get so desperate. But usually I'm not in a situation were a little child comes up with an stupid idea.
Applejack seemed to relax a bit. According to this I suppose I really looked desperate.
"Well, sorry for that partner, they sometimes come up with crazy ideas." (I suppose you are right with that.)
"No problem. So to say, since I'm here I'm used to be in situations I'm not used to."
"That's good for ya. Can I do anything else for ya?"
"Actually, no, I'm finished over here. Goodbye!"
"Cya."

The next days nothing special happend. Training with the recruits, training with Rainbow and no accidents (It still is a mystery to myself how those guys didn't produce any accidents under this training circumstances) or weird kids. Everything went fine and after one and a half week we took the barn down. According to what everypony present looked like they had never seen a real explosion in their life before (Just to remind you, most of them were supposed to fight wars!).
But all in all, this digression was a success.

For a few weeks my routine went on just as usual. I was now used to Equestria and it's....specialities and I've to admit, I began to enjoy it. Life here was happy, colorful and....simple. Not like the life I was used to.

Then, one day, somepony knocked at my door.
"Come in."
"Are you Franz Siegmann?"
"Yes."
"Here is a letter for you."
"Thanks."

I looked on the cover. It said:

Cliff Hanger
Personnel department

Authors Note

If there really is somebody out there who is looking forward to updates of this story:
1. Thanks for reading it so far (Of course to everyone else as well)
2. Sorry that it took me so long to publish this chapter
3. If you are looking forward to another chapter soon, I fear I'll have to disappoint you. Soon I'll go to the US for a half year and I don't know how much (or even if) I'll be able to write there. I'm really sorry for this but i can't change it.

Chapter 5

Chapter 5

The next days nothing special happend. I soonly got used to my new daily routine: Getting up, putting my cloths on, going into the town, finding myself a nice spot to sit and eat something (Whereby I steered clear of Sugarcube corner) while I read in some books about flying wich I borrowed from Twilight Sparkle (Who apparently ran the Ponyville library), meeting with Rainbow to train with her, going to the base and going to bed.

But on one day, I just putted my cloths on and intented to go to the town, somebody knocked at my door.

"Come in, please."
A grey pegasus with a blonde mane, a bubble cutie mark (How did she get that?) and crossed eyes came in (Isn't this restricted area? At least I thought so....), looked around and finall turned to me.
"Hello, I got an registered letter for, ehmm, Franz Siegmann. Is that you?"
"Indeed. Could I please see it?"
"Of course! At least that's why I'm hear you silly."(I thought about answering on that, but I didn't for obviuos reasons)
"Here you go!"
She putted her mouth into the saddlebag and...
"That's a muffin." I said.
"Oops, my bad." she answered.
"Here is the letter."
"Thank you, ehmm, what's your name?"
"Ditzy Doo, but some people call me Derpy (I can't imagine why)"
"Fine, thanks than Ditzy, and have a nice day."
"Thanks, bye."

She wanted to fly out of my room, but instead she hitted the doorframe. Without saying anything, she left my room after she hitted it twice again.
I opened the letter:

Dear Mr. Siegmann

we read your letter about the circumstances in Ponyville. We got similar letters from all other advisors, even though most of them weren't as dircet as you discribed the situation. Therefore, we will send you some equipment wich Equestria can't produce on it's own (At least in the moment). This equipment contains:

-20 assault rifles of the type AR 3
*with 2000 rounds of ammo for each weapon
-20 pistols of the type SP 56
*with 200 rounds of ammo for each weapon
-20 bulletproof jackets
-20 steel helmets
-20 mobile communication systems of the type WCD 69

The equipment will arrive within the next days. You may already noticed, that this is not enough equipment for all soldiers in your base. In fact, we are working at an arms deal with Equestria, but in the moment this equipment is just borrowed, so be careful with it.
You also may noticed, that we won't send you any camouflage suits. Apparently, as it is not very hard to produce them on your own, Equestria will do so. You have to get a local dressmaker to make some for your troops.

The ministry of defence

I read trough it again and again. The text by itself was not very strange and more or less like what I expected it to be. Only the part about the camouflage suits was strange. I mean seriously, would it have been so complicated to send some suits with the other equipment? Anyway, I couldn't make the suits on my own or just conjure them up. So I had to, just as the letter suggested, get a local dressmaker to make me some. And I already got an idea who I could ask.

Raritys boutique was at the eastern edge of Ponyville. As I arrived there, I didn't hesitate and went right in. It was one nice, wide room (Wich in my taste was a bit too pink). Suddenly, a ladylike voice spoke to me.

"Hello Franz, darling, how can I help you?"
"Hello Rarity. Well, as you may know, my job is to improve the Equestrian military. That does not mean only the drill, but also the equipment. It turned out that there is no proper equipment at all here, so I had to order some. But, in fact, they won't send me any camouflage suits. For some reason, they want me to order them somewhere else. And that's why I'm here."
"So you want me to make uniforms? Oh, i got some WONDERFUL ideas! I think the best color would be a dark blue with golden lines and..."
"Nonono, I think you got me wrong. I don't want any UNIFORMS, I want CAMOUFLAGE SUITS. They don't have to look nice, their only point is to diguise myself to make me hardly visible."
"You don't have to explain me what a camouflage suit is, darling, I know that by myself." (Than why did you mistake it for an uniform?)
"Well, as I said I need them, twenty, to be exactly. How fast do you think you can make them?"
"Apparently, I got a lot of orders to work on....Let's say about, ehhmmm, two weeks?"
"Two weeks?" I gasped.
"Sorry darling, I fear I can't make it any faster."
"Sure, no problem. But let's talk about the design instead, shall we?"
"Sure, what do you want exactly?"
"Well, I need some standart camouflage suits, nothing special."
"Some standart camouflage suits..."She thought loudly"Wait a minute, I'll be right back!"

She came back with an outsized hat, wich for some reason had a camouflage design.

"Just like that?" She asked.
"Yes, just like that." I answered.
"Ok, I'll start work as fast as I can. I'll call you once I finished."
"Great, thanks, but we didn't spoke about the payment yet."
"Oh, this can wait. I mean, I don't know how much I'll need to make your suits. It would be... let's say optimistic, to already charge you a bill."

"She's pretty generous." I thought by myself as I left the boutique. Suddenly my thoughts were interrupted by a few bell punches.
"It's alredy 3'o clock? Damn, I'm coming to late to the training with Rainbow!" As I had to work the first time in the past six days, I completely forgot about it. Twenty minutes later (Or rather too late) I arrived at our usual training ground at Sweet Apple Acres.

"Hey Franz, where have you been so long?" Rainbow said. (Way less flatly than the last time I were too late.)
"Sorry Rainbow, but apprently I got a letter from the Ministry of Defence from what I had to take care that the soldiers in my base get camouflage suits because they won't send me some, so I had to go to Rarity to order some."
"Oh, no prob...wait, does this mean you will soon have no time to train with me?" She said, and looked a little sad.
"I fear so, Rainbow." I answered.
"Oh." That was all she said, but now I definitely sure she was sad about it.
"Well, that's in a few days the earliest. And so long we still can work on the "Sucide Pirouette", so, let's go. Apparently, I hadn't time to read in my books today, so I think we will just do again what we did last day..."

Authors Note

You may wonder why it took me so "long" to publish this chapter. Well, first, when I started the story I knowed what it should be about. Apprently, in the moment I still got some ideas, but I need some more inspiration to put them in an actual context.
And second, I'm working on another story in the moment. It's a crossover, so much I'll say, and I got a script for it, so it's not so hard for me to write it because I know what's next. That's just all I wanted to say so you don't wonder if there is a time where I don't publish so much chapters. In fact, I don't have so much ideas left, so I will just look where this story leads me.
At this point I also want to say "thank you" to all who gave me some feedback, this story will go on, don't worry .