Half and half

by Trigger_Finger

Rating: mature
Tags: Original Character, Random, Slice of Life, Sex, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic
Length: 13518

A night of heavy drinking leads to drunken sex between a certain batpony and stallion.

After a brief argument and scuffle, a batpony makes a new drinking buddy, which leads to a new sex buddy which eventually blossoms into a wonderful friendship. Equestria truly is the place where friendship is magic.

Disclaimer- Too lazy to find a good cover photo, but you'll understand this picture at the end of the story. If you don't like it, then bite me...

Published 2016-01-04 20:40:02 UTC
Last updated 2016-01-04 20:40:02 UTC

The only chapter

Dark storm clouds shrouded Canterlot, rain pouring down onto the now lonesome streets as even darker thunder clouds rolled in, blocking out Luna's glorious moon for the time being. The time was late, most stores and shops quickly closing up as the hour drew near.

The few ponies that remained on the streets scuttled about, rushing for shelter from the pouring rain that cascaded upon the glamorous city. Lightning flashed above, retained to the clouds and making them glow an ominous blue.

Of the few ponies that remained on the streets during the torrential downpour, fewer still trotted casually along. Among the gloomy streets walked a lonesome stallion, a dark oilskin duster coat draped over most of his body, the coat itself so long it nearly dragged along on the cobblestone street.

Rain splashed against his coat, rolling off the waterproof hide. His damp hooves trotted peacefully through the large puddles that had formed on the streets. Each one of his hoof steps created a small splash of water that would further dampen his already soaked legs.

His mane drooped low, soaked through and through. His face remained rather expressionless. Despite his rather gloomy and lonesome appearance, he was far from either. A shiver went down his spine from the cooler temperatures, a shiver that made the cold all the more worse to bear. If there was one thing he felt at that moment, it was chilly.

As the rain continued to pour down, the stallion looked up to the clouds, the fur on his face straightening out as he looked to the thunder clouds above, sighing to himself. He pondered the idea of cutting through back alleys, which would cut his time in half, but in the end settled for taking the long way, crossing the now gloomy streets of the big city.

“First day back... and it's pissing rain, eh?” he muttered under his breath, his soaked fur starting to drop past his lips as he walked along the streets with his head hung low, avoiding eye contact with anypony still on the streets.

Another shiver rattled his body and he adjusted himself underneath his coat, getting comfortable. 'At least my back is dry,' he thought to himself positively as he stopped for a moment to wipe the back of his neck, a gush of water squeezed out from his soaked fur and splashing to the cobblestone below.

Continuing on his way, he looked back to the Canterlot Royal Castle, of where he had just came. “Shoulda taken Luna up on that offer tuh stay the night...” he mused to himself before smirking and thinking silently to himself. 'Might have gotten a bonus...'

Finding his way, he slipped down a back alley, one that was even darker than the streets. As he casually trotted along his ear twitched slightly, the tip missing from having been chewed off. His chewed ear rose to full attention and he listened closer before there was a screech, a clash and a bang, a mangy stray cat lunging from a nearby dumpster and taking off down the alley. "Goddess damn cats..." he mumbled to himself.

The commotion startled the stallion but not enough to force any physical reaction from him, instead he simply began to trot along again. As he turned a corner of the alley he was befronted by a homeless pony with a change cup.

'Goddess... I didn't think homeless were allowed in Canterlot!' the stallion thought to himself in a grumpy way as the raggedy homeless stallion shook the cup.

“Change... got some change?” the begger asked, the stallion trying to sidestep the panhandler but to no avail. Fishing his hoof through a coat pocket, he grabbed out a few bits and donated to the homeless stallion before continuing on his way.

'I go out and work muh ass off, risking life and limb... and that guy sits in an alley an' gets money fer nothing... I'm really in the wrong business,' the stallion thought silently before finally coming to a stop. He had reached a dead end, a single door stood before him with a single, dim, flickering light above it.

Slowly walking up to it, he gave the door a few good bangs with his hoof, a little view port sliding open. There was a brief pause before a voice on the other side scoffed. “Celestia... I was hoping I'd never have to see your ugly mug ever again,” snapped the voice, the stallion merely rolling his eyes.

“Are yah gonna let me in 'er what, yah miserable cunt!” the stallion shot back, the second one snapping back with a remark just as witty.

“There's a front door you know, you northern dickhead,” the voice behind the door told him, the stallion huffing.

“I hate front doors as much as yah hate ponies. Now why don't yah just let me in so yah can get back tah sippin' tea an' eatin' biscuits, yah pommy bastard,” the stallion insulted the voice. There was a small pause before the voice spoke up again.

"What's the password?" he asked, the stallion huffing as he continued to get rained on.

"There is no damn password. Just let me in you pommy Prance bastard," the stallion scoffed.

"Oh come on, you northern bastard. Say it, say the word!" he nearly pleaded, the stallion huffing deeply.

"Fine... fine, I'll say it... eh," he grumbled, the door quickly unlocking and swinging open.

Stepping into the small dark hallway that quickly led into a staircase, the stallion was greeted to the sight of a somewhat lumbering batpony. Looking to the stallion as he shut the door once more, he spoke in a joking manner. “Goddess, I don't know what's worse, having to look at your ugly mug, or having to hear your wretched northern accent again,” he quipped, poking at his northern heritage.

“Guess that makes two of us,” he joked back before the two embraced into a hug, laughing all the while. Breaking from the hug, the stallion gave him a nod before heading towards the stairs.

“Staying long?” the batpony asked, the stallion shaking his head before shaking off like a dog, water flinging off his tail. “Damn, too bad. Was hoping to make fun of your accent a bit longer,” he laughed, the stallion rolling his eyes with a smile before heading down the stairs and putting on a stone cold expression.

A wafting fume struck his nostrils hard as he entered, what the locals called, The Cavern. Officially, and legally, it was a bar like any other, serving alcoholic beverages. Unofficially, and more importantly, it was batpony territory. A place where thestral ponies could feel at home and relaxed, without being discriminated against for their differences.

The underground tavern was rather cold, and dim lights made for poor sight conditions, which all the more suited the batpony lifestyle. Making his way into the tavern, several heads turned his way, giving him silent glares. The stallion could feel the tension in the air. For reasons beyond him, there was a stigma against batponies, and as such they didn't take kindly to ponies in 'their side of town'.

However, even so, there was no official rule against either going into the opposites establishments. The stallion slowly made his way through the crowds, some previous conversations going silent as the batponies would stare at him with bitter glares.

The stallion took no mind to it and headed right up to the bar counter, taking a seat on a spare stool before speaking up. “Bar keep,” he called, the thestral pony turning to him before a wide grin came across his lips.

“Ahhh, laddy, how have yah been lately?!” he asked before quickly trotting over, the two shaking hooves.

“Like I look,” he commented, the bartender giving him a serious once over before exhaling.

“Geeze... that bad huh?” he replied, the stallion giving him a quizzical look.

“What? No, I look fantastic! Capital F for fucking fantastic,” he laughed, the bartender joining in on the laugh.

“Well jeeze kiddo, it's great to see yah back in town. What's it been? Three-” the stallion cut him short.

“Two weeks, five days and twenty-one-” he cut himself short before looking to his watch. “Twenty-two hours as of fifteen minutes ago,” he remarked, the bartender raising a brow with slight shock.

“Well than... right down to the tee huh? So... what'll it be?” he asked the lone stallion who perked a brow.

“Ah dunno Jack... what do yah think ah should have?” he addressed the batpony by his name before rubbing his chin. “Ah'm cold, wet an' chippy but ah want tah be miserable,” he stated.

“Hard day at the office?” Jack asked, the stallion rolling his eyes in confirmation.

“Jack... ah'm thinkin'... piss warm mug a beer, something bitter but sweet,” the stallion stated, the bartender nodding before preparing the mug right in front of him, topping it off before sliding it over, the stallion rolling a few coins back to the bartender in exchange for services rendered.

Jack leaned on his side of the counter as he spoke. “So tell me laddy, anything exciting happen this time around?” Jack asked as the stallion, whom Jack referred to as laddy, took a sip of his warm beer.

“Come on Jacky boy, yah know I'm not allowed to tell yah that. Classified an' such, eh,” he stated, the bartender chuckling.

“Well, maybe once I feed you a few more beers than?” he laughed, the stallion raising his glass to the bartender.

“Then it's a date,” he quipped before pounding back a big gulp of the disgustingly delicious beer. Shaking his head with a 'Yelch!' he set down the nearly empty mug before reaching into his coat.

A hoof poked him in the back, gaining his attention as he rooted around his coat pockets. “I think you're a wee bit lost there little pony,” quipped a batpony dressed in Lunar Guard armor. Turning around, he nearly groaned, wishing he'd never had the light of day to see them ever again. However, despite that, the stallion blinked in a seemingly confused way, turning to the bar counter, then turning back to the group of three Lunar Guard officer ponies.

“Ah... wull... ah dunno. I thought this was The Cavern,” he replied in a gentle voice. The two guard ponies on each side of the first snickered.

“Indeed it is. You're on the wrong side of town little pony, and we don't appreciate your kind here,” the first guard pony stated in a worsening tone. The stallion kept his innocent look as he tried to keep things calm.

“Well... no harm, no foul. Right? I'm just here for a friendly drin-” he reached for his drink but was cut off as the first batpony guard purposefully knocked it over, spilling the remaining contents.

“Whoops, my bad... but you've had enough to drink as it is anyway. Time to run along home, little pony,” the guard laughed, the others joining in as well. A few others nearby went quiet as they watched the events unfold, the bartender being one of them.

Jack swallowed deeply as he cautiously watched everything unfolding, knowing exactly how this was about to unfold. They weren't gonna let him have a peaceful drink...

The lone stallion looked to his spilled drink, then back to the stallions in uniform. “That... was a good drink yah just wasted, eh,” he nearly snarled, the three aggressors sneering and snickering towards him before the first poked him in the chest with a hoof, rather hard like.

“You better walk on home little pony, before you do something you'll regret. But I guess up north is a far way to walk, EH,” he said insultingly, the others joining in on the laughter. "Sorry, had no idea you were from all the way up there, EH. Just oot 'n' a boot?! There's a moose on the loose!" the gang of officers knacking at his accent. The bartender swallowed hard as he reached under his counter. The stallion sat alone but let out a sigh before nodding.

“I-I-I guess y-you're right, maybe I have had too much tah drink already,” he stated as he slowly drew out his cigar and placed it firmly between his lips. The Lunar Guards all snickered amongst themselves, nudging each other as the first spoke again.

“Now go on, run away with your tail between your legs,” the leader of the group laughed, the final straw for the stallion whom slowly turned to leave. Time seemed to slow for just a moment, the stallion closing his eyes as he listened to the bitter insults the Lunar Guards spat at him, the bartender slowly stepping back, and the few batponies that sat in silence as they watched, most others too busy to care.

Time began to travel at a normal pace again and the stallion purposefully swayed in his seat as he went to leave. He didn't even direct his attention to the stallion as he addressed him. “You're just as cowardly as I remember you,” he remarked, the leader perking a brow. In a flash however, he grabbed his spilled mug by the handle, smashing the glass as he spun on his stool and drove the shattered handle right into the side of the lead stallion's muzzle.

The first let out a shriek of pain and agony as the other two were caught completely off guard. The stallion drove a quick straight punch right into the guard on the right's nose, getting a satisfying 'CRUNCH!' as his response before the lone stallion let his body fall back.

As he began to fall off the stool, he lurched his body into a backflip, driving a hard upwards kick with a hind hoof straight into the Adam's apple of the guard on the left. Landing on all fours, he made a quick assessment of the situation. The second stallion he struck was tearing at the eyes from a broken nose, staggering about in pain. The third was on the ground flailing, choking in a non-fatal way as he tried to breath for air.

The first held the side of his bleeding muzzle but was stable and almost ready to fight. The stallion leapt at the first and tackled him into the floor but a cocking sound caught the stallion's ears as Jack's voice spoke up.

“Alright laddy, that's enough!” he said as he pointed his cannon stick at the stallion, a weapon the stallion knew all too well, and somewhat personally. The bartender had devised such a device for when things got out of hoof, just as things were.

Jack had strapped a relatively short, thick gauged steel pipe to a 2x4 and closed off the back end of the tube. Overall, the cannon stick was just over three hooves long and rather short and stubby. The end of the pipe was somewhat fluted and gave the weapon a rather terrifying appearance.

He would then stuff an explosive powder down the pipe along with tiny salt coated pebbles. There was a hammer flint system near the back of the cannon that was attached mechanically to a trigger and would set the gun off. With how Jack loaded it, the cannon stick wasn't anywhere close to fatal, but it was enough to put some serious hurt on whomever was on the receiving end.

Knowing all too well what it felt like to be pelted by the cannon stick, the stallion quickly got off from atop the Lunar Guard, stepping back but not before spitting on the batpony's face. “You give Lunar Guard's a bad name,” he spat as the group all scrambled to their hooves and took a cautious step back.

Jack wavered the cannon between the group and the stallion. “Alright... now everyone's gonna go back to their seats... and I'm gonna pretend nothing happened... alright?!” he snapped, almost more terrifying than one of the regal princesses when they were pissed off.

The stallion slowly rose his hooves defensively, taking a cautious seat as the Lunar Guards scampered off. Jack lowered his cannon stick with a sigh, the stallion perking a brow. “Would yah have really popped me with that thing?” he asked, Jack giving him a stare before smiling.

“Like the first time we met,” he mused, the duo smiling at each other.

“So does this mean I'm off the hook?” he asked, Jack licking his lips in thought.

“Well... I saw everything. They were in the wrong... but did you really have to stab him in the muzzle like that?” the bartender asked before chuckling. “But spilling a stallion's drink like that does warrant a royal flank-kicking so... it could have been worse.”

The stallion resumed his seating, hunching over on the counter as he looked to all the shattered glass as Jack swept it into a small pan. The stallion sighed as he rolled a few coins Jack's way. “For the mess... and the... whatever else,” he mumbled, to which Jack promptly discarded the broken glass and poured him a new mug of warm beer.

“Just for you,” the bartender said with a wink. “I'll put it on their tab.” The stallion chuckled to himself as he took the new mug of beer and sipped at it with a satisfied sigh.

'Something about the flavor of free beer just tastes... perfect,' he thought silently to himself as the tavern settled again. As he sat and mused to himself, Jack returned and the two began to chit chat about old times and the good ol' days.

The stallion was half finished his warm beer, which started to cool due to the atmosphere of The Cavern, but he didn't mind all that much as he started to feel a slight tweak in his nervous system. Setting the beer aside, he fished out his cigar again, placing it in his lips before fishing around for his matches. The bartender leaned on the counter, his bat wings tucked in at his sides just as a customer called out to him.

“Be right back,” Jack told the stallion, whom just nodded as he chewed on his cigar while trying to find his matches. “Don't get into any-STAR, NO-” Jack screamed, the lone stallion being caught on the side of his face by a bar stool. The impact dazed him severely, knocking him off his seat and sending his world spinning, the cigar flying out of his mouth's grip. Where the metal stool seat had struck his head lay a big gash, going completely vertical. The bleeding wound started about an inch above his left brow and ended roughly an inch and a half lower than his eye and bled profusely.

He heard Jack's voice, muffled in the back of his mind by his impaired state just as he felt a presence jump on his back to assault him further. As a strike went to connect with him, the stallion rose his right foreleg up high, directing the blow away from his head.

With instinctive movement, his left foreleg came around and grabbed the striking limb as he pivoted his body, shifting the attacker's balance off quilter before yanking the aggressor to the ground and pressing his right foreleg across their throat, beginning to forcefully choke them out.

“ENOUGH!” Jack screamed just as the stallion started to come too from his daze, quickly realizing the attacker was in fact a mare batpony. He quickly stood up and staggered back, still partially dazed from the blow.

The mare stood up, her wings splayed wide as she snarled at the stallion who took another cautious step back. “Listen lady,” he began to try and talk his way out of the fight. “I don't hit mares, so knock it off,” he tried, his charisma rather lacking.

“You'll pay for that,” she hissed before launching herself at the stallion. Quickly sidestepping her, he stuck out one of his hindlegs and gave her back a little bit of a push with one of his front hooves, sending her toppling over the counter and spilling the stallion's drink.

'Shit... not again,' he thought quietly just before a loud noise went off. Inside the tavern it sounded like a crack of thunder and the stallion grunted as his body was tossed several feet away from the counter.

The whole tavern went deathly silent as the stallion lay on the floor, his side pelted by what the bartender liked to call 'Pebble-shot'. The salted coating of the pebbles burned in his flesh wound, the main oomph of the shot stopped by his thick oilskin duster, but none the less he had still been pelted at point blank range.

Jack stood with his cannon stick, smoke emulating from the black powder used in the shot. The plume of smoke concealed his presence for the time being as he yelled out to the entire cavern, while using a towel to fan away the smoke. “ENOUGH IS E-FUCKING-NOUGH! Any of you pricks are full of piss and vinegar, I'll take you out back and fill your ass with pebble-shot!” he roared at the top of his lungs, the tavern seeming to get even quieter than before.

Wavering the cannon around, nopony said a thing and he slowly slid the cannon back under the counter before turning to the attacking mare. “Sit your ass down!” he ordered her, to which she reluctantly obliged. Looking over the counter and to the stallion that still lay a few feet away, Jack spoke.

“How yah feeling?” he asked, the stallion sighing with a pained groan.

“Stuck somewhere between joyful and peachy,” he complained. “Why'd yah shoot me?!” he grumbled, Jack shrugging as the stallion staggered to all fours.

“Because I know you can take it better than anypony. Hell, most ponies, bat or otherwise, wouldn't even be talking right now, let alone standing,” he quipped as the stallion brushed several of the loose salted pebbles from his wound, several others partially lodged under his skin.

“So does this mean I'm in trouble?” he asked with a slight grimace. Jack shook his head.

“No... but I'd like to formally introduce you to Shooting Star here whom... I'm sure you've had the honor of meeting,” he joked cynically as the stallion wiped blood from the gash on his face.

“It was a pleasure, really. I'm not sure what hurts worse right now, my face or my ribs,” the stallion mused just before the mare piped up.

“Jack, don't play these stupid games! I know Star Dancer is a real arse, but you just let this guy kick the crap out of Dancer and his squad! Him! A pony! In our bar!” she yelled, Jack motioning for her to quiet down.

“It's my bar. Not yours, not Star Dancer's, hell not even Luna's... mine. Did you see it with your own eyes?" he asked, Star settling down before shaking her head.

"No... I only just saw you pointing that cannon and yelling at everypony," she replied begrudgingly.

Jack nodded with a sigh. "Well I saw it all, with my own two eyes. Star Dancer deserved that... maybe not to the extent he was given but this guy right here...” Jack trailed off and pulled the stallion into a tight hug, the stallion groaning wildly in pain. “Me and him go way back, even before I opened this place... so have some respect,” he told her, the stallion piping up.

“Yeah Jack... respect my busted ribs,” he groaned painfully, Jack just tustling his mane in response.

“Oh hush. I've seen you go through worse,” he teased as he let the stallion go. Shooting Star gave both stallions a glare, a glare which Jack partially returned. “Star, this stallion has seen some pretty mean stuff, and all he wants at the end of the day is a peaceful drink. Is that too much to ask?”

Star looked to the battered stallion with a scoff. “Well than maybe he should've stayed on his end of town, with all the other prissy ass-hats,” Star growled, Jack nearly howling in laughter.

“Him? Prissy?! Bwa-ha-ha-ha. Star, you may want to buy him a drink and have him tell you a story. He is the furthest thing you'll find to a prissy pony,” Jack chuckled, Star glaring at the bartender.

Star scoffed at the suggestion. “There's no way in Tartarus I'm buying this pony prick a drink,” she snarled, Jack just shrugging.

“Well... I suppose you have to at this point. In all honesty, you spilled his last one,” he reminded her, pointing out the spilled beverage. The stallion wavered his hoof.

“Hold up... do you guys... know each other or something?” the stallion asked, a little confused but mostly dazed from both the blow to the head, and the pebble-shot to the side of his ribs.

Star huffed. “This bloke here serves the finest booze in Canterlot... and isn't a prejudice prick to nopony; bat, griffon, donkey, whatever. Plus the atmosphere here is just right,” she informed him, Jack speaking up to give the stallion a better idea.

“What she's saying is she frequents this place more than you do the hospitals,” he stated, the stallion rolling his eyes from the crude joke as he wiped away more blood from his forehead. “But really, Star, you owe this poor chap a drink. You spilled his and he took a wad of pebble-shot for you,” he commented, Star giving him a look.

“You saying you would've shot me with that blunderbuss contraption?” she asked jokingly, Jack nodding seriously.

“If you had've hit any other pony I would've shot you for it... partially because I know you'd be able to take it better than them. This guy though, is the only thing I know who is tougher than you,” he said, Star taking offense to it.

“What?! That pipsqueak? Are you kidding me? I've been through The Badlands, captured and held captive by dragons, toured through the Griffon Kingdom and even battled in one of their 'arenas'!” she nearly screamed, Jack just shrugging it off like nothing she had done could be considered an achievement compared to the mystery stallion.

“That's nothing compared to what he's been through,” Jack stated, claiming the stallion's adventures to be apparently so much more daring.

“Yeah, try me. What are you? Celestia's elite Solar Guard?” she inquired, the lone stallion shaking his head in response.

“They're a little too... judgmental and uppity, to take in a stallion like me,” he replied, Star snickering about his remark.

“Well ain't that the truth,” she laughed, nearly forgetting what Jack had said. “But if you're not Solar Guard than what are you? I doubt you're a Lunar Guard, nor an elite Night Wing,” she commented, the stallion nodding.

“You're right about that. I'm a little bit too much pony for them. They're about as judgmental and hypocritical as the Solar Guard-” Star cut him short.

“We are not!” she snapped in response, a little defensively.

“Well... you don't let every day ponies into the Night Wing, I'll say that... but I will give them a nod for not being a bunch of pompous ass-hats,” he said truthfully, Star snickering yet again. “But in all seriousness, if I had to chose which unit to serve under, all day... or rather, all night it would always be, one hundred percent, the Night Wing... but I digress. Like I said before, I'm a little too much pony to be a Night Wing and a little too different to be a Solar Guard,” he stated, Star raising a brow.

“You think you'd be good enough for the elite? HA! In your wildest dreams. If you're so good, what do you do?” she inquired, almost snobbishly. Jack nudged her, taking her attention away from the stallion for just a moment.

“I'd be careful about how you talk to him. Remember, he was the one on top of you just a half hour ago,” Jack reminded her, Star nearly gasping.

“What?! We have not been talking for that long!” she nearly snapped, the lone stallion rolling up the sleeve on his duster and nodding in response.

“As of five minutes ago. And to answer your question... my proficiency in... ahem, my area of expertise, caught Celestia and Luna's attention. I may be too different for either of their elite units, but that doesn't mean they didn't want me working for them...” he trailed off and looked around on the floor before finding what he was looking for.

“So than what in Tartarus do you actually do?!” Star snapped as the stallion leaned over and scooped up his cigar. He put the homemade cigar between his lips yet again, mouthing it around before he gave her his definitive answer.

“I'm a private contractor,” he informed, Star scoffing at his answer.

“Oh goddess, not another loose cannon, thinks he's seen the world, done it all, is too good to be a regular soldier, grunt... elite my ass,” she remarked, the stallion just shrugging as he rummaged through his coat for the packet of matches. Jack nudged her yet again.

“Be careful about what you say. You might be surprised,” Jack inquired, Star laughing it off.

“Please, you think this guy has had it rough. I doubt any of his stories even come close to mine. So, hotshot,” she turned back to him and nudged him, making him fumble his pack of matches and drop them. The lone stallion tossed his hooves up slightly as he went to pick them up.

“What?” he asked through the mouthful of cigar.

“Well, you're so sure of yourself. What grand achievements, superb adventures, daring escapades... anything, have you done?!” she asked, almost too sure of herself. He shrugged it off as he searched the floor for his matches, just wanting a smoke.

“I don't consider any of my, as you put them, adventures to be grand or daring. That's Jack's thing,” he replied, finding his matches with a satisfied exhale. Jack again nudged Star, in a somewhat lecturing way.

“Hey, laddy, tell the lass here about the time a few years back when you were in The Badlands,” Jack inquired, Star nearly gasping.

“W-wait... wait, you were one of the guys...” she trailed off in shock, the stallion having a cold bitter face about it. “No way... no fuckin' way,” Star commented, dropping the F bomb in response to her utter shock.

The stallion regretfully put away the pack of matches and cigar for the time being and turned to her. “Yes, actually... fuckin' way. I was, along with a group of others, in The Badlands... and they call it The Badlands for a reason... Star,” he stated, the batpony mare nodding.

“I know, I know. You don't have to tell me. I was there,” she said, the stallion immediately shooting her an ugly glare, one that nearly made her want to shrivel up as a cold shiver went down her spine. “W-what?! I was, seriously! No word of a lie!” she nearly gasped, the stammering voice betraying her inner fear.

“I'm trying to remember your face,” he commented, Star swallowing hard.

“W-why?” she stuttered out.

“To remember if you're one of those chicken-shit, pussy assholes that saved face and ran home,” he remarked. Star shook her head feverishly.

“No-no, no I never ran! I swear to goddess... holy sweet Celestia... you were one of those guys. Glorious Luna, I was just a fresh recruit then, fresh out of the academy... I had never seen anything like that before,” she remarked, memories flooding back to her as the stallion gave her a once over.

“Hmm... I don't rightly recall your face but... orders came right from the top. Me, and about a dozen other private contractors were to escort a Lunar Guard detachment down to The Badlands. Training local forces and what not, also partially training newbies in the guard,” he stated, ending his story there as he fished out his cigar again.

Star waited for the end of the story but it never came. “Y-yeah bu-but shit went south. I remember it. That one night!” she proclaimed, the stallion sighing irritably as he once again put away his cigar.

“Yeah... shit went south alright... and that fucker right over there... your comrade in arms...” the stallion pointed begrudgingly over to Star Dancer, whom now had his muzzle wrapped in medical bandage. “Was the commanding officer of the Lunar Guard unit stationed down there... and that cowardly, chicken-shitted, ungrateful piece of trash asshole... fuckin' backstabber! He fuckin' saved face and flew off with his tail between his legs, him and a few other junior officers,” he retained himself from roaring as he slammed a hoof into the desk.

“Y-yeah, yeah I remember it. More than half of the guard left, to go get reinforcements, right?” she asked but he shook his head.

“That's probably the bullshit they told the new recruits when they got back. Star Dancer over there... ordered the guard to retreat when shit hit the fan. He knew it, I knew it... hell we probably all knew it. The village was probably gonna burn that night... and truthfully, I thought we were gonna burn with it,” he stated, Star nearly torn in half between her own beliefs and what the stallion was telling her.

“N-no, no that's not true! They were going to get reinforcements!” she exclaimed, the stallion chuckling as he fished out his cigar yet again.

“Does it really take a whole platoon's worth of Lunar Guards to go get reinforcements?” He began but then just sighed and dropped the subject. “You know what? Fine. You believe whatever that chicken-shit asshole told you...” he placed the cigar in his lips as Star sat there, her mouth gaping slightly. The stallion turned back and, as he saw her slack jawed look, twitched his lip. “I remember you now. Cute, little, young mare... couldn't have been more than eighteen at the time. Spriteful, young, energetic... freckles across her cheeks. Yeah I remember you now. Full of piss and vinegar. Ready to fight, ready to serve her country and her princess... really impressionable,” he remarked before turning and mingling to himself, pulling out the pack of matches.

Star was left baffled, completely shocked to what she was hearing. 'Sure Star Dancer is a cocky arrogant cunt of a stallion, but he wouldn't run away... would he? Leave his troops behind to die?' she thought to herself silently, knowing there was no way. She hadn't been told by Luna herself, but rather by Star Dancer that it wasn't a retreat, but that they were going for reinforcements. Of course that was after everything had happened and they returned. “I... so what really happened?” she asked curiously, still half and half about what to believe.

“I thought you liked Dancer's answer more. It has a happy ending,” he replied as he went to strike the matches.

She gave him a nudge, forcing a deep sigh out of the stallion as he, yet again, put away his cigar and matches. “Just... I want to know your version,” she implied and he turned to her with a frown.

“Well... I'll warn you. My version is a lot darker and doesn't feature a happy ending like that ass-hat's version of it,” he stated, giving a glare to the back of Dancer's head. She nodded, wanting to know.

“Well... anywho, as you probably recall, raiders started bombing the hell out of that village we were stationed at. Real bad stuff. Dancer over there, being the commanding officer, orders a, as he put it, 'tactical retreat'. Basically leave the villagers to fend for themselves against the savages. There was this... sergeant, I can't remember his name now-” he was cut off by Star as she interrupted him.

“Plumb-Berry!” she exclaimed, the stallion perking a brow.

“Yeah... that was it... but I recall him hating that name. Grisly ol' fart...” he trailed off and Star picked up again.

“So what happened? Dancer said he was going for reinforcements,” she tried to get him to pick up his story.

“Well... The Sarge... Plumb-Berry... he told Dancer right to his face he wasn't gonna chicken-shit his way out, and that he was gonna stay back with his stallions and mares and defend the village... course Dancer didn't see it the same way and said he was gonna have Plumb-Berry court-martialed for... mutiny or something there of... the sarge told him to shove it. Course just about every other pony there at the argument saved face, turned tail and flew home right then and there, didn't tell nopony else... The Sarge conjured up the story of them going for reinforcements so moral wouldn't continue to drop,” he stated, Star unable to believe what she was hearing, still trying to believe what she had originally heard and not this new version of it.

The stallion licked his lips as he turned back to the bar counter, looking to Jack whom was leaning on the counter listening to the story. Jack and the stallion met eyes as the story unfolded. “So after Plumb-Berry tells the remaining troops in the village, in a way that wouldn't cause panic... that the others were heading back to fetch reinforcements, we all keep fighting the raiders that are still coming at us full force... course at that point its just him and... two other veteran NCOs and a whole mess of new recruits... plus the private military guys. We weren't gonna get paid if we turned tail. We're as loyal as a mutt when it comes to getting paid.” Star's gut instinct started to lean towards this stallion's story.

“Oh sweet Celestia... that was a blood bath... The Sarge bought it a whole five minutes into the fighting, the other two NCOs bit the dust sometime in the night... a lot of us private guys bit it too. Some of the village fighters and more than a few civilians... and a couple of the new recruits... goddess they were so young,” he wiped his mouth with a hoof, remembering that bitter night.

“Came morning time there was a couple of my guys and... maybe just over half a dozen's worth of the original recruits. About a quarter of the village was left, the rest was burned to ashes. Dead were all over the place and starting to stink,” the stallion stated as he again pulled out his cigar, not yet fitting it in his lips.

“A few days later, here comes the Calvary, and not a minute too fucking soon... in an act of... democracy and diplomacy and... whatever, we order an evacuation of the town, and not a day later the raiders burned what was left to the fuckin' ground. So it was all for nothing... but I guess there was some justice in the matter. Dancer was demoted. Luna originally wanted to court-martial him for deserting a bunch of recruits but in order to cover it up she couldn't put the asshole on trial... or... some other bullshit about democracy that I have yet to understand.” The stallion let out a sigh as Jack rose a brow, urging him to continue with the ending.

“AND... most importantly... for diplomatic solutions, somepony had to take the blame for the dead civilians. Of course, the private forces are expendable so... we bite the arrow for that too, taking the blame for everything. They pin it on us, saying we were loose cannons and that we were partially responsible for the civilian deaths and all that crap, and that the recruits there were actually just training civilian fighters and weren't part of the fighting... we got paid extra to keep our mouths shut though, so that's a plus,” he mentioned before finally fitting the cigar in his mouth, a sign that the story was over.

Shooting Star blinked blankly. She remembered everything unfolding afterwards, how the whole operation was kept mostly hush-hush and that anypony in the guard whom had been there was forbidden to speak about it.

Finally coming to terms with herself, she laughed off his story, having Jack raise a brow. “Okay, so you tell me this whole story, expecting me to believe that crock of shit, then tell me you were paid extra to keep your mouth shut. What happened to being loyal to money?” she inquired, the stallion shrugging as he, hopefully for a final time, was forced to remove the cigar from his mouth.

“I never said I was trying to make you believe me. You asked, and I answered. And besides... it doesn't matter what I say, or what you say... or what Jack here says. History is what the government writes it to be. No more, no less. It doesn't matter what a drunken private forces guy says, it's still what Luna and Celestia make it to be,” he mentioned, Star's gut twisting as a stake was driven between what to believe.

“Well... you know what, fuck the truth. JACK!” she yelled out, the bartender flinching.

“Aye lass, I'm right bloody here,” he winced.

“Oh, sorry.” She turned back to the stallion. “Regardless of what the real truth is... ha! I remember you now. You were bald and had a goatee back then,” she laughed, remembering the stallion, Jack laughing about the matter.

“Yeah, and it came down to here,” he said, hovering a hoof about six or seven inches below his chin. “Looked like a rat made a nest on your face. So glad you shaved up and grew your mane back,” he commented, the stallion rolling his eyes before speaking.

“You know, one of the main reasons I like thestral bars over regular pony bars is because... they let me smoke inside...” he rose a brow but Star nudged him.

“Listen... regardless of what really happened, there's one thing I do know for certain. I probably would've been dead had it not been for you... and shit, I guess I also spilled your drink earlier so I think that warrants me buying you something. Jack, order up, two of whatever this guy's having,” she ordered, the stallion snickering.

“You won't like what I drink,” he mumbled to himself, Jack perking a brow.

“Aye laddy, careful what you say. The lass here can drink with the best of them,” he warned, the stallion leaning back.

“Alright... if she's buying... whiskey,” he informed, the mare giving him a risen brow for the choice and Jack chuckling.

“So I reckon yah mean the white stuff?” he asked, reaching under the counter to his secret stash. Star looked to the two before asking.

“White?” she asked, the stallion nodding.

“White whiskey... actually, Jack. Maybe mix it with something. Go half and half. I still gotta walk home after,” he stated, the mare nudging him.

“Afraid of a little drink?” she asked competitively, Jack chuckling.

“Oooh, laddy boy, that sounds challenge. Best be warned though, she'll probably out-drink yah anyway.” The stallion chuckled on his seat.

“Okay. So be it. Make it straight Jack,” he ordered, the mare turning to him again as Jack came up with an average sized mason jar. It was filled with a clear liquid that looked like it was possibly just water.

“So what is this stuff and why haven't I heard of-” she was cut off as Jack opened up the jar and poured the beverage, the wafting smell hitting her hard like a freight train and making her eyes water. “Wow!... why is it burning my eyes from here?” she asked, rubbing her eyes attentively.

“That's the paint thinner... err maybe... yeah, it might be the battery acid actually,” the lone stallion commented, the mare nearly gasping.

“Sweet Celestia, what is that shit?” she gasped, Jack and the stallion both chuckling before the bartender spoke.

“Our own personal brew. I'm not legally supposed to sell it but... well, it's on the house so...” he slid over the two mugs, both half filled with the mystery drink. The lone stallion leaned over and nudged her.

“Still able to go half and half on this stuff. Word of the wise though, it burns worse than mouthwash,” he mentioned as he took a daring chug, immediately pulling the mug away from his lips and gagging.

The mare dared to match him, pounding it back. At first instance, she thought it to be not so bad, but immediately regretted the drink. It tasted rather rancid and quite horrid. And then there was the burn. It was worse than pouring alcohol on an infected gash... and the burn was in her throat. “Goddess alive... what in Tartarus... who would actually drink this shit?!” she asked, nearly puking, but then turning to see the stallion sipping away at his beverage, ever so gingerly and contently.

Jack mused to himself before addressing the two. “Alright, well I have to tend to the taps. Don't be getting into any more trouble, or it'll be the pebble-shot for both of you,” he warned wholeheartedly before leaving to tend to the needs of others, having been chatting with the duo for nearly an hour.

Star took another sip and shook off the bitter taste before looking to the stallion. She wondered through her thoughts for a moment as she looked at his face. He was kinda cute...

"So why did you hit me?" he asked, shocking her as she thought he wasn't looking.

"I uhh...what?" she asked curiously.

"Well you hit me. I'd like to know why. Defending your friend?" he asked, the mare shaking her head.

"Goddess no. I hate Star Dancer. Prick is arrogant, loud mouthed, pushy, nosy... has his nose up everypony's arse... no I was just... well, when you're a batpony, in a batpony bar and you see your comrade in arms getting knocked on his flank by a regular earth pony... well, you know how it is," she told him and he nodded acceptingly. “So... any more stories?” she asked, the stallion shaking his head.

“No. They're all classified under confidential only. That Badlands incident went public so I'm allowed to talk about it. It's earned a lot of controversy and more than a few rumors and conspiracies so... me talking about it when I'm drunk doesn't warrant anything,” he commented.

“Whaaaat? Come on... tell me something,” she pleaded, a little drunkenly. The stallion smirked.

“Maybe when I have a bit more to drink,” he informed, the mare in return raising her glass.

“Then here's to drinking,” she proposed, the stallion laughing lightly.

“Never needed much reason to drink,” he replied, clanging his glass to hers. The night went on and it wasn't long before the duo started talking of their great adventures they'd had, Star originally starting the conversation with one of her own stories and everything went from there.

As night progressed into morning, Star couldn't help but think that the stallion was a real cutie. She tried to wipe that image away but in the end figured he was actually quite a stud... and there she was having a drink with him, feeling like the luckiest mare in the bar. Taking a brief look around however, she realized she was the only mare in the bar, as most others had went home. “Wellsh... hot dayum...” she slurred drunkenly as the stallion chuckled.

“Shoulda went half and half,” he muttered under his own drunken breath as he pulled out his cigar, swaying in his seat as he went to finally have that smoke he so badly wanted. Putting the cigar to his lips, he fetched out his pack of matches, content to finally have a smoke.

Just as he was about to strike them however, Jack came around to speak with them. “Sorry laddy... Star. You'll have to both head home now. Closing time,” he told them, Star whining.

“Whatshhh... noooo wayyyy,” she slurred as she grabbed hold of the stallion's foreleg and hauled him over. “Givish... me thass... see, it's only...” she looked at the watch and then to Jack. “What doesss thissh... this shhh-shay?” she almost chuckled, drunk beyond her wildest dreams.

“It says five o'clock in the morning Star. That also means closing time for me, and home time for you. Nothing personal,” he said, trying to shoo them out the back door. The duo staggered out into the alleyway, the stallion just as drunk as the mare and the two stumbling around like a pair of homeless buddies, also looking the part at this point.

Looking around, the city was still coated in darkness. Too early yet for the sun and the city itself still basked in the darkness of thunder clouds that resided ominously overhead. The stallion staggered a bit as he fit the cigar in his lips, Star meanwhile staggering into a couple of nearby trash cans and knocked them over, laughing about the matter as garbage was spilled onto the ground.

“Bwa-ha-ha-HA! If Luna saw me now... she'd shit stardussht!” she cackled foalishly. The stallion shook his head, wondering if the mare was supposed to be on duty today or not, and then wondering whether or not he should escort her to the barracks to keep her out of trouble. He then recalled however that Lunar Guards mostly worked the nights and had the days off, where Celestia's royal guards worked the day.

Shaking off his thoughts he grabbed his pack of matches and finally, most joyously, struck them. The pack ignited in a puff of smoke and fire as he neared the flickering flame to the tip of his cigar. No sooner had he done so, than a crack of thunder erupted overhead, a downpour of rain splashing against him and extinguishing the flame.

He muttered a quiet curse as he tossed away the wet matches and soggy cigar. Star rolled around in a dirty alleyway puddle before looking to her drunken friend and laughing as his mane started to droop in the rain.

“Pfft, bwa-ha-ha-ha,” she cackled, pointing at him in a drunken stupor before standing and staggering over. “Lookshh... look at you... all wet like a cat! Meow!” she laughed, patting him on the head like he was the cat in sentence.

He flinched as she touched the gash in his face, and she quickly retracted her hoof. “Oh yeah... sorry about that,” she apologized, the stallion waving it off.

“No, no it's nothing... but damn, you hit pretty good for a mare,” he told her to which she smiled brightly, displaying her sharp teeth. With a nod he spoke. “You know... I wouldn't mind doing that again some time,” the stallion smirked, the mare sighing.

“Alright, alright... alright... okay,” she said, trying to pull herself together from the drunken stupor she was in. “Go ahead,” she offered, standing upright.

“What?” the stallion asked.

“You wanna get back at me for that cheap shot... and I'll mare up to that. It was pretty uncalled for...” she responded, the stallion shrugging it off.

“Nah-nah, I don't care. You weren't wrong for what you did. Hell, Star Dancer probably told you some cooked up bullshit of a lie... I've been hit a lot worse. What I meant was get all loaded up and stagger around,” he laughed, the mare giving him a slight stare.

“Don't get all attached to me or anything. This was just a one night thing... or something,” she said, trying to think what to say but the words in her mind coming out before she thought about them. The stallion took the lead as he spoke.

“I didn't say it was something, I'm just saying it was fun... and that I wouldn't mind having fun again... getting drunk all over. You're not bad... for a batpony,” he mentioned with a smirk.

The mare smirked back but still stood to full attention. “Well... either way. I gave you a pretty bad cheap shot. So go ahead, slug me back.” The stallion shook his head.

“I really... I don't want to. I don't hit mares,” he replied, the mare huffing.

“Look just... slug me one already would you? Punch me in the nose, back-hoof me, slap me across the cheek. Whatever gets you off,” she told him, the stallion twitching his lip as he thought to himself with a faint, and most sly smile.

“Whatever?” he asked and she nodded as she closed her eyes and braced herself for the imminent strike. "Okay, suit yourself." The mare went to flinch from a blow but instead the stallion pressed his lips to hers. The mare jolted from the kiss and nearly jumped back then proceeded to slap the stallion across the face, splitting open his gash again.

He winced and twitched as it began to bleed profusely. “AHHH, HEY!” He gasped as blood began to soak his fur. “You said whatever I wanted!” he reminded her, the mare scrunching her nose.

“Well I didn't think you'd do that!” she reported, staggering a bit as she looked to him, thinking to herself that he looked hotter and sexier every time she looked at him.

“Well why not? You're kinda pretty,” he said, himself suffering the same effects as she was, the mare now looking like a model through his intoxicated vision. The two of them stared at each other for a good while before the mare nearly lunged at him, pressing her lips to his in a fiery passion.

Struggling against the unbalance that drunkenness brought, the two began to make out in the alleyway, their tongues fighting one another and exploring the other's depths. Star thought for a moment as she felt the stallion's sharp teeth.

'Nice teeth,' she thought as the stallion thought the same. Pressing the stallion up against the wall of a building and pinning him between her and said brick wall, she giggled as rain continued to pour down on them. She looked to his soaked face, mane drooped down and some blood soaking into his fur from the bleeding gash that was now opened up again. “What's... wet, and damp... and soaking wet?” she asked, too drunk to piece together her own joke. The stallion looked at her strangely.

“That's all the same thing,” he replied, the mare looking at him with the same stupid look he was giving her.

“Whaaaaat... no it's not... oh wait, yeah it is. No, there's one more part to the joke but I forget it now,” she told him, the stallion rolling his eyes.

“Well than how am I supposed to guess?” he asked, the mare snickering as she leaned up to tell him the answer, like the answer itself was a secret.

“My pussy,” she giggled, the stallion perking a brow...

* * *

The duo fought through the door of his apartment as they continued to make out. His place, despite his rather generous income, was kind of crumby and run down. His apartment was located in the far end of Canterlot, in what most considered the slums.

It didn't bother him too much however, as he was hardly ever home. Continuing their lustful kissing, the two staggered about, knocking over several objects including, but not limited to, flower vases, picture frames and glass ornaments, all of which shattered against the floor.

Staggering over to the living room, the two tripped over some of the stallion's exercise equipment, the stallion clunking the back of his head off a weight plate. 'Ouch,' he thought quietly.

“Where's your damn bed,” Star grumbled, looking around and spotting a horizontal bar mounted to the wall. “HEY COOL! I didn't know ponies slept like bats! I thought you guys had mattresses!” she chimed, the stallion shaking his head as he pointed over to a door.

“No, that's my room over there,” he commented in a slur, before pointing back to the bar. "That's my chin-up bar, you ditz!" he told her just before the mare grabbed him by the tail and started to drag him across the floor.

“More fucking, less talking you twat,” she ordered, the stallion getting dragged across some broken glass that chewed into his exposed legs, the mare having not taken into account all the broken glass on floor.

Dragging him through the door, she looked at his dirty mattress and bed, perking a brow. “This place is great!” she said honestly, though that honesty may or may not have been hindered by her intoxication.

Letting go of the stallion's leg she hopped up on the bed and propped her rear end high. “Okay stud, rut me like you mean it!” she ordered, the stallion staggering to all fours and looking in awe at the sight before himself. In his vision, she was the hottest batpony he had ever seen, and how she was presenting herself to him was perfect.

His erection sprang to full mast as he staggered a bit, slumping to one side as the mare wiggled her rear, a little impatiently. She soon felt his presence behind her but he again stopped. “Ahh crap... I don't have any condoms,” he mentioned, the mare huffing.

“Ponies can't get batponies pregnant you twit,” she told him then thought back on the few stories she'd heard about ponies, or batponies, getting pregnant from the other. “Usually. Now start fucking or I'll cut that thing off and fuck myself,” she told him, the stallion perking a brow.

The stories he'd heard about batponies being aggressive and somewhat dominant in the bedroom appeared to be true, from what he could gather. His hooves gripped her flanks, spreading them apart and looking to her glistening slit.

Star waited for what was certain to come, but instead got a shocking surprise as she felt a wet tongue lace itself around her nether lips, her rear end tensing up. “What are you-ahhh...” she hummed in pleasure as she felt his tongue travel straight up her slit, spreading her lips apart ever so slightly.

She hummed glorious notes of pleasure as his tongue traveled back down and flicked her fun button, making her squeak out a moan. “Ahhh... damn, maybe I'll have to cut your tongue off instead,” she moaned as the stallion continued to tease her winking twat.

Hoisting her rump up a little higher, the stallion continued to gently tease the mare, in a way that was almost ticklish to her. Looking under herself, she saw his thick meaty package swaying between his legs, accompanied by a pair of large testicles. It wasn't the biggest she'd ever seen before, but it definitely was enough to get her even more aroused about the whole idea.

Twisting her body and snagging one of his legs with hers, she twirled their bodies around into a sixty-nine position, wanting to get a better taste for what he had.

A final moan left her mouth as she felt his tongue go back to work on her, still teasing her winking lips. 'Two can play at this game,' she thought as she lowered her head to the base of his shaft and began to slowly lick up the underside of his length. His rear end tensed up and she could tell she was having great effect on him.

His tongue didn't work as proficiently as before and he began to leak precum, and rather generous amounts of it at that. She could tell, almost certainly, he hadn't been with a mare for a good while.

Reaching the top of his length, she licked the tip, lapping up all the pre and giving him a loving little kiss right at the peak. She felt his tongue spread her a bit more but continued to tease her in an almost irritating way. Here she was, willing as ever, and he was just laying there teasing her...

Licking around the tip, she began to tease him right back, getting several grunts of pleasure but nothing to extreme. She felt him shift under her, almost uncomfortably as she continued to tease his length.

His teasing stopped for a moment as his tongue trailed down to her little nub and gave it a suckle, earning a yelp from the mare as she gasped, her back arching and pressing their bodies together. No sooner had she gasped, did his cock twitch and spurt a thick wad of precum against her cheek.

Returning her lips to the peak of his erection she spread her mouth around his girth and began to slowly indulge herself. However, standing her grounds, she only took a mere inch of his length, lapping her tongue around his tip that resided inside her warm mouth.

Getting the message, the stallion pressed his muzzle into her juicy pussy, spreading her lips apart and slithering his tongue into her entrance. She let out a muffled moan as the stallion grunted into her moist hole.

Sliding his length down her throat, she began to fellate him to the best of her drunken abilities, also partially distracted by the tongue that was doing wonders to her lower section. 'He may not be the biggest I've ever seen, but he certainly knows how to use his tongue,' she thought to herself as she continued to bob her head.

Huffing, the stallion's lower section tensed as another thick wad of precum left his shaft, splattering against the back of her throat. He was getting close, or rather, closer from what she could gather.

The mare hummed notes of impending satisfaction as his tongue explored her depths very exquisitely, finding all her most sensitive spots and teasing her with them. As he continued to explore her, she felt him nearing her most sensitive area, the thought alone of him reaching that spot drove her wild.

Pressing her rump firmly against his face, she nearly suffocated him, but nonetheless drove his tongue right across that special spot, making her scream out wildly as her whole body tensed up, he inner lips contracting against his tongue and holding it in place against that area as she rode out her orgasm on his face.

Nearly collapsing, she began to grind her hips against his already stuffed face, getting muffled reports that only further skyrocketed her orgasm.

Eventually settling down, her rear end was suddenly pushed away, the stallion gasping for air. “Ahhh... huuuh... wow... okay then,” he gulped, the mare looking to his face that was splattered with her juices. She smiled to herself. To her, in her drunken thoughts, it was like she had marked her territory.

Satisfied with his performance, she wanted a more 'in-depth' feel for what he was sporting. Rolling over, she came face to face with him and pressed her lips to his, tasting her own substance in his mouth.

Pulling away from the lustful kiss, she looked to him with crazed eyes. “Now rut me like a bull, you stud!” she ordered, the stallion having no problem with obliging. Grabbing her hips, he aligned the mare's entrance just over top of his rod, bringing her down ever so graciously until the tip made contact.

The two let out a single, unison moan as the pleasure drove them both wild. Her lips began to slowly spread apart around his length as he gingerly penetrated her love tunnel. Star bit her lip to hold back her moans of pleasure as she watched his entire length slowly disappear inside of her.

She could feel every texture of his cock spreading her tight pussy wide. Every vein, the flared head, even the ridge of his medial ring. Breaking her silence with a moan of wild ecstasy, she drove herself down the final few inches, feeling the head of his cock bottom out inside of her.

Before he could say a thing, she pressed her lips to his, invading his mouth with her tongue once more. Feeling around, she found herself exploring his sharp canines. 'These things are awesome. As a pony, he's pretty lucky to have them,' she thought quietly.

Pulling himself out of her, he slowly slid back into her with relative ease, her tight pussy rather constrictive yet producing a pleasurable friction between the two. Star let out another moan of ecstasy that traveled down the stallion's throat.

Starting to pick up the pace, the mare on top of him began to let out more vivid moans of pleasure as he thrusted himself into her sopping wet box. 'Damn she's a good fuck,' he though to himself quietly.

Placing her front hooves to his chest, she began to ride him wildly, screaming out and calling him an assortment of names, ranging from rutting bull to fucking twat and everything in between.

The stallion chuckled to himself, wondering just what was going through her drunken mind, and he wondered what exactly was going through his. Here he was, a battered old PMC banging some hot, off the shelf, model batpony whom served in the Lunar Guard. 'I should savor this moment a little bit more,' he thought to himself as he began to nuzzle into her neck, still thrusting away at her.

He let out a yelp however, as Star suddenly bit into his shoulder with her sharp teeth. “OWW! Hey!” he winced, the mare not returning an answer as she whined into his shoulder, her rear end tensing up again. His length consistently stroked against her most sensitive spot, her clit constantly rubbed by the underside of his medial ring as he pounded away at her.

He knew what was coming, thinking to himself thankfully. 'Glad she didn't bite last time she came,' he recalled. Holding her tight, her inner muscles contracted against his shaft, seeming to coax him into his own orgasm that snuck up on him rather suddenly.

“Holy shit! I'm about to-” he was cut off as he went to pull out but Star pressed her hips down onto his lap, trapping him inside of her.

“Oh no you don't stud! You're giving me the full experience!” she demanded, the stallion huffing as he felt her muscles continuing to contract against his shaft, and finally driving him over the edge.

He erupted inside of her like a broken water mane, jetting his seed into her depths as he huffed, thrusting himself deeper as he continued to cum, quickly filling her to the brim and causing her to overflow.

With a wild moan, Star bit down on the stallion's shoulder yet again, making him yelp and twitch, cumming even harder as his body tensed from the bite. Coming down from their orgasmic high in unison, the duo beamed at each other, if rather drunkenly.

“Wow...” they both said together as Star collapsed on him and began to rub his chest attentively. “Don't!... think this means anything. It's just a one night thing,” she warned, the stallion shrugging. He was fine with that in all honesty. As she continued to carress his chest, she hummed to herself. “They were right. You earth stallions sure are a good rut,” she commented, the stallion rolling his eyes as he spoke.

“Uhh... yeah, earth stallion...”

A slight beam of light cascaded through the window as the thunder clouds parted from the sky and Celestia's sun began its morning rise...

* * *

The stallion awoke in his bed with a groan and thumping pain all over his body, accompanied by a resounding headache that he couldn't discern whether from a hangover or from the nasty knock to the head he had received.

With the numbing effect of alcohol no longer in his system, the full pain and sting of the pebble-shot in his side along with the broken glass in his leg and the gash on his forehead... it all came around. Turning over, he found himself on an empty bed, all alone.

“She must've went home when I was sleeping,” he thought as he looked to the alarm clock. It was just before noon and the sun was out in full bloom, not a cloud in the sky, which meant the sunlight coming through his window was awfully bright and just made his headache worse.

Getting up, he limped a bit from all his injuries as he discarded his duster coat, trotting bare into the washroom of his small rundown apartment. Grabbing some medical supplies from his first-aid box, the stallion cranked the shower to a rather warm setting and stepped in with a scalpel and scissors in hoof.

Washing himself down, he flinched as he began to extract all the salt coated pebbles that still resided, and stung, rather excessively. Every single pebble was just underneath his skin and required a small slice with the scalpel before being removed with the scissors. Tiny pebbles dropped and plinked against the ceramic flooring of the stand up shower.

Washing the wound out, he soon began to pull out all the pieces of glass in his hindlegs. “Goddess... those damn batponies are wild...” the stallion said to himself as droplets of blood dripped down onto the floor of the shower.

Finishing with the wounds, he quickly washed himself off, enjoying it as he spent a good hour savoring the warmth of the water. It had been a good while since he had a nice wash and he wasn't about to pass up the opportunity to enjoy it.

Figuring it to have been long enough, he shut off the shower and shook himself off before stepping out. The window was fogged along with the mirror and the whole bathroom had a steamy atmosphere too it.

Drying himself off with a towel, he made diligent to take his time with his most sensitive areas. With himself dried off, he dressed his injuries and rather painfully stitched up the gash on his forehead.

“Ahhh... damn...” he whispered as he used his towel to dry off the mirror, looking to himself with a huff. “Aren't you just the most hideous freak a' nature, eh?” he commented, letting loose with his northern accent.

Stepping out of the washroom, he fetched a finely rolled cigar off the table and a pack of smoking matches before heading for the balcony door. As he did so however, he gasped and shuddered upon a most shocking sight.

“Goddess dammit... freaky ass batponies...” he muttered under his breath as he saw Star cuddled up under her wings, her tail latched around his chin-up bar with a content look on her face. One may have saw it as cute, had they not stumbled upon it by accident in their morning routine... afternoon at that point.

The lone stallion shook off the shock and headed out to the balcony. It was warm out, fresh air... he took in a deep breath as his wings spread wide, letting air in under them and feeling the warm breeze traverse across his entire body. “It's not a pretty life... but someone's gotta live it,” he said to himself as he fitted the fine smelling cigar in his lips.

Striking the entire set of matches, he neared the flame to the cigar before spotting the little labeled picture on the pack. There was a droopy looking cigarette with a caption reading 'Tobacco products lead to erectile dysfunction'. He blinked for a moment as the matches continued to burn, the cigar still in his mouth. He thought for a good long moment before the flame on the burning matches neared his hoof, forcing him to make a snap decision.

With a dissatisfied groan he shook his hoof, extinguishing the matches. Taking hold of the cigar in the same hoof, he tossed them over the edge of the balcony before leaning on the railing. He had never gotten his smoke...

With his stomach rumbling he headed back inside, turning on the burner for a fry pan before cracking some eggs into it and popping toast into the gritty old toaster that would probably sooner light aflame than properly toast a slice of bread.

Scratching his chewed ear, he began to rummage around in the fridge for some milk or orange juice. Fishing out a carton of milk, he looked at the expiration date and noted how it was expired by over a week's time. Tossing it out the nearby window, he chuckled as he heard old lady Applenathy's mangy cat hiss, growl then scamper away.

Fetching the orange juice, he smiled as he saw it was within the limitation of expiration. Setting out a cutting board, he began to slice up some home fries, tossing them into the frying pan as well.

Like a mangy old dog, he began to kick and scratch behind his chewed ear with a hind hoof. His ears flapped and twitched before he got back to making himself breakfast, even though it was afternoon.

Leaning on the counter while the eggs and fries cooked, he began to pull out the necessary utensils, but ended up dropping his knife. “Son of a...” he trailed off as he leaned down to grab it but ended up just bumping it with his hoof. “Ugh... what I'd give to have fingers like a diamond dog...” he muttered as he knelt down and began to search for the knife under the counter.

A voice picked up as he searched. “I thought I said not to get too attached,” Star joked, the stallion snickering.

“You're the one still in my house,” he laughed back as he continued his search for the missing utensil.

“But those eggs are for me right? They smell really good,” she inquired, the stallion chuckling as he grabbed something hard and looked at it.

“Nope... just a lighter,” he replied softly to himself as he tossed it away, not needing it anymore.

“What was that?” Star asked from the other side of the counter.

“I said maybe if you ask nicely,” he responded before finally finding the knife. “Ahh... here it is,” he mentioned as he stood up, Star looking to him with puppy dog eyes but soon gasping as she saw his full form.

“HOLY SHIT! You're a fucking... you jerk!” She went to strike him hard but he quickly knocked her hoof away. “Dammit! Why didn't you tell me!” she yelled, trying to strike again but her blow being swatted aside by the seemingly calm stallion.

“Chill out Star, it slipped my mind, but it's nothing to worry about,” he informed her but the batpony would have none of it.

“What do you mean 'Don't worry about it'? I... what if I'm pregnant?!” she snapped and he gave her a stupid look.

“Pregnant? Really? From something like me?” he asked and she snarled as her wings went wide.

“The teeth... dammit I should've know. The wings too!” she pointed out his resemblance to batponies. The stallion rolled his eyes at her and pulled down on his right eyelid.

“Look at my eyes... my fur... my goddamn ears, or... what's left of them,” he told her in a very calm voice. “It's hard enough for ponies and batponies to have a foal-” Star cut him short as she came to a sudden realization, now noting his regular pony-like appearances.

“Holy Tartarus... you're one of... those hybrids! A half breed right?” she asked and the stallion nodded. “Woah... woah, sorry about freaking out like that. It's just... well you know... you see bat wings on the same guy that came inside you the night before and...” she trailed off, not really having to say much more.

“Yupp... pops was a batpony and ma was a... well, let's say for her sake, an exotic dancer. Thought with the low chances of fertility between a batpony and a regular pony they wouldn't need protection... never knew my dad, just some random guy my mother gave a dance to... still want those eggs?” he asked, Star shaking herself out of the story.

“Oh yeah... pwetty pwease?” she asked with big round puppy dog eyes. He just chuckled and laughed as he slid a plate of eggs and fries towards her, the mare's smile going wide. “Not a stallion alive can resist that...” she trailed off and sniffed the air before scrunching her nose. “Is something burning?” she asked, the stallion's stomach sinking as he turned to see his toaster aflame.

Quickly slipping on some oven mitts, he grabbed said toaster and hucked it out the window, hearing it clash and shatter down in the alleyway below. “You know... you're supposed to clean those every so often,” she informed him, the stallion nodding.

“Y-yeah... I uhh... I just never got around to it,” he remarked as he grabbed himself a plate.

Star looked to him. “So... you being a hybrid means you can't have kids right? Like a mule, your chromosomes are all messed up,” she mentioned, having heard the stories about the hybrids.

“Yupp... meaning I don't have kids in Mexicolt or The Griffon Kingdom or up north in The Crystal Empire-” Star cut him short.

“Goddess... that's a lot of sex,” she mentioned and he just chuckled.

“No... not as much as you think. I gotta work hard for my bonuses.” She chuckled at his explanation before nudging his hoof with hers.

“Well that'll come in handy when I'm in heat,” she quipped, the stallion cocking a seemingly unimpressed brow. “Oh... sorry, it slipped.” He just chuckled.

“Now who's the one getting attached... besides, I hate kids, even when I was one,” he joked, the mare laughing.

“So... if no strings are attached... would you be game to do this again some time?” Star asked. “Not a relationship thing, I mean... like this. I like the idea of getting drunk, getting slammed and then waking up to a finely made breakfast,” she replied, the stallion chuckling to himself.

“Well... I'll just have to see about-” he was cut off by a hard pounding on his apartment door.

“Open up in there! I know it was you, you dirty... YOU!” screamed an irritated old mare's voice. Star turned towards the door as the stallion only groaned. The banging continued as the mare outside the door threatened to knock it off its hinges. “Open up in there... you splashed my Mittens with rotten milk... AGAIN!” she screamed.

Shooting Star blinked in confusion. “Her mittens?” she asked, rather confused. The stallion shook his head.

“Sweet Celestia... it's the damn cat lady from downstairs... hey Star uhh... you wanna fly?” he asked in a slight panic as the rapping on his door continued, along with the screaming.

“Wha... are you asking me on a date?” she asked, the stallion shaking his head feverishly as old lady Applenathy continued to scream.

“Look at Mittens, look at him! He's soaked and smelly. LOOK AT HIM!” she screamed at the top of her lungs.

The stallion grabbed Star's hoof. “No, not a date. Just trust me, let's get the hay outta here right buckin' now!” he stated, his wings springing open.

“Than it's a date,” she joked, her wings also springing out and the duo both whizzing out the balcony door and taking flight. Zipping through the air gracefully, the two quickly gained altitude and found themselves soaring through the clouds, plummeting through them joyfully and laughing all the while about the crazy old kook of a cat lady.

“Mittens?” Star nearly cackled and the stallion nodded.

“There's also Cotton, Smokey, Kitty, Echo, Moony... there's like five or six dozen damn cats in her house... ughhh...” the stallion shook. “There's also Lizard,” he shuddered, Star perking a brow.

“Do I want to know?” she asked, the stallion shaking his head.

“Nope,” he replied subtly as he turned over onto his back, still soaring through the sky. “You know... I've never really kicked back and relaxed like this in a long time kid... thanks,” he sighed contently, the mare gliding over and bumping into him.

“So you're down to do this again, cause... well, you know. I never got that breakfast you made me,” she laughed, the stallion joining in with a nod. As they glided along, the batpony turned to her newfound hybrid friend. “You know...” she trailed off, the stallion perking a brow and looking over to her. “This whole time, I never got your name...”

Author's Note

Well... before anyone asks anything, I just want to say I was just kinda plinkering around with an idea to make a surprise plot-twist story, something kinda like the Book of Eli, where you find out the shocker, read back and go "Oh... so that's what he really meant"
I don't know if I can pull it off so I just tried and... I dunno, I think it's kinda catchy. Originally I wanted a werewolf pony that... anyway it got too complicated and I was like "I know what I'll do instead." so I did it.
Anyway, for anyone who still can't figure out the picture, that's Lizard, the cat that the unnamed stallion (Who shall remain unnamed) made mention of... cause, you know... Lizards don't have hair and... anyway.
Cheers, eh (There, I said it:raritywink:)