Evergreen Heart

Chapter 30
Convergence

The warm rays of the midmorning sun intruded upon her slumber. After weeks of sleeping under a tattered itchy rag, the feeling of clean sheets all around her was almost alien, but she relished it all the same. She slowly opened her eyes, staring at the unfamiliar white ceiling. It had been a few days since the fall of Ivory Oasis and she and several of the liberated were being treated for malnourishment back in Kipaji Kito.

Trixie had awoken in a near panic several times in the past few days, expecting to see the same stained and dirty ceiling of the slave quarters, only to slowly realise she wasn’t there anymore. She was told these anxiety attacks would pass, if not become more manageable with time. Time that couldn’t pass swiftly enough for her. She wasn’t alone. Windy, still woke up crying from time to time too. And the poor nurses dared not wake Gordon for fear of being unintentionally mauled by the gruff griffon. And then there were Copper and Kijani, who had refused to leave their room at all, though something else might be going on there. Maji had been taken to the palace. Though she promised to stay in contact with Trixie.

The sound of the hospital staff going about their business formed a quiet din in the background that broke her from her thoughts. There was also the scent of wildflowers. She turned her head to look at the bouquet that took residence in a little vase on the nightstand, left there by Aeron before he went to speak to the Queen. And there was one other item there. A small almond shaped seed. The last remains of Herb.

Propping herself up she looked to the window. It was nearly midday, but despite her mostly pleasant slumber, the experience of the last few weeks had left her exhausted, physically and mentally. A quiet knock on her door drew her attention.

“Miss Lulamoon? How are you feeling?” Bon Bon said softly as she entered the hospital room and came to the magicians bedside. Her voice was still a bit raspy, but otherwise recovering fine.

“Trixie feels fine, Agent Drops, all things considered.”

“That’s good, and Bon Bon is fine.” The mare glanced around the room scrutinizing the bouquet on the nightstand. “Is it safe to talk.” She said not removing her eyes from the flowers.

“Uhhh, Yeah.” Trixie said a bit perplexed.

The earth mare turned to face the unicorn and bit the inside of her cheek, clearly something weighing on her mind.

“I need to speak plainly, and… you may not like what I will say, but I NEED you to listen. Can you do that for me? Please?”

Trixie felt her body tense at that, and a lump seemed to form in the pit of her stomach, but if the past few weeks had done anything they had tempered her patience. “Alright.”

With a sigh Bon Bon looked to the window. The spires of the capital glittered in the distance, gratefully still standing.

“I remember seeing you and Aeron around town. The two of you always seemed close. But it appears that your adventure here bloomed into something more than just friendship.”

“Y-yes.” Trixie answered unsure at first what this had to do with anything.

“Are you sure that’s a good idea?” Bon Bon said pointedly. Her tone was not mocking, nor trying to be mean or cruel in any way. It was said plainly, but there was an ominous weight that Trixie could feel behind it.

Despite this, Trixie decided to press on. “What do you mean?”

“Miss Lulamoon… Trixie, he leveled a town to find you. Decimated, an entire populace. They may have been the scum of Equis, but that doesn’t excuse the fact that the lengths and...methods, he went to, to get to you were not those of a sane pony.”

Trixie just sat in silence. She couldn’t deny that part of her felt they deserved it. The humiliation at the stockade, the pleas of the enslaved, the sobbing of ponies being branded and sold like they were nothing, being robbed of their own lives, and their freedom to choose their own destiny. Whoever does that to any free thinking being is without pity, and deserves... she couldn’t bring herself to finish that thought.

Yes, they were monsters. Yes, such a prospect was unforgivable. But did they deserve to die? And if so, in a manner that she could only describe as something akin to torture only equaled in a pit in Tartarus?

“Aeron is a dangerous individual, Trixie. The things he can do and has willfully done are sociopathic at best. Do you really want to get mixed up with someone that unstable?”

“It wasn’t him! He-” Trixie tried to argue, before being cut off.

“DON’T EVEN!” Bon Bon slammed her hoof down on the bed frame. “I looked into his eyes while he tortured a prisoner. He wasn’t some overtaken soul. What he did was sadistic and cruel, and he did it willfully!”

The silence in the room seemed to echo. It took a moment to realize that her heart was racing.

“I’m...” Bon Bon continued, forcing herself to be calmer this time, “I’m not saying he should be harmed. In fact, after what happened I’m glad he’s okay.” not to mention incredibly unnerved, was the part she left unspoken.

She watched him being literally revived from the dead by one of his little pets. If all it took for him to shake off death was one of those little things surviving long enough to reach him, how would they ever stop him. She pushed that thought aside.

“The amount of power he wields is dangerous enough on it’s own. But throw an unstable psyche into the mix and you have a bomb that’s just waiting to go off.”

She paused to take a breath.

“He needs help. He needs to be someplace where he can’t hurt anypony.”

“Tartarus?” Trixie asked weakly, gathering already where Bon Bon was going.

The mention of the place always made the Agent cringe. “In time he might be able..”

“I have heard what you said, Agent Drops.” Trixie spoke, clearing her throat. “Thank you. But I need to rest.”

“Of course.” Bon Bon stood and walked to the door, once more eyeing the beautiful arrangement of flowers on the table, especially taking notice of the thorns. “Good day Miss Lulamoon.”

**********

“You put me in a very difficult position mister Aeron.” Said Queen Marijani from atop her throne.

She looked a lot like Maji, in fact they could be mistaken for twins if it weren’t for their different eye colors and mane style. Where maji’s eyes were a bright aquamarine, her older sisters were a shade of peridot green. And instead of Maji’s more tomboyish faux hawk, Marijani’s mane was tied into dreadlocks adorned with golden rings, which I later learned were ceremonial.

I was currently standing in the throne room of the Zebrican palace. What was different here compared to Equestria, was that Queen Marijani’s throne was surrounded by four seats on either side, forming a semicircle with her throne at the center. From what I understood these were her trusted advisors who formed the council of elders. I couldn’t help but be somewhat reminded of the Jedi council as I glanced at them briefly. The majority of them were zebra, but there was also an Okapi, a Wildebeest and, most surprisingly, a Diamond Dog among them. All of them were getting on in age.

Normally, they would govern the day to day functioning of Zebrica with wisdom, patience and reason. Much like the way villages were governed in ages past, before Zebrica had large sprawling cities. Should they fail to agree upon something, then the Queen herself formed the tie breaker. Or, should she feel justified in doing so, she could overrule any decision they made. Which I’m told is a rare occurrence.

“You committed grievous acts on Zebrican soil. Causing injury and so many deaths I do not even wish to look at the numbers. It would be fully within my rights to lock you in a dark hole and throw away the key.”

I could feel the beast wanting to snap at her for threatening us. But I bit back the angry retort and kept my eyes downcast. Just keep calm. Gotta keep calm.

“On the other hoof, your actions destroyed a slave trafficking ring, freed over a hundred of our citizens from said slavery. Brought an end to the dreaded warlord Wasio Moja, and most importantly of all, gave me back my little sister.” her stern expression melted into a little smile.

Well that was really more of a group effort, I honestly can’t take credit for all of that. All I did was rampage, giving the slaves a chance to revolt and free themselves. But I’ll take what I can get.

“Your majesty, if I may, It was never my intention to cause trouble. I came to Zebrica with my marefriend to look for help with a.. personal problem. We got caught up in a very bad situation that… escalated.” I finished weakly.

“That would be the understatement of the century mister Aeron. Tell me, what do you intend to do, should I decide to let you go?”

I took a moment to gather my thoughts before speaking. “I would find the help I came for, and hopefully resolve the.. personal issue. If all turns out well, then the only thing I want is to spend time with the mare who stole my heart, and simply enjoy some peace and quiet together.”

Luna knows we could both use some. I thought.

“And if you can’t find what you are looking for?” she asked pointedly.

“Then…” I’m fucked, and so is the world. “We will move on, and you will never hear from us again.”

The Queen then took a moment to deliberate over the issue with her advisors.

“In light of everything that has happened, and taking into account the promise my agent made to you, We hereby grant you your freedom. But consider yourself on probation for the time being mister Aeron. I do not wish to see you in front of my throne again.” She said sternly. Then her voice took on a milder tone. “Unless you and your marefriend are here to visit my sister. Understand?”

“You have my solemn vow, your majesty, that I will do my utmost to prove worthy of the mercy you’ve shown me.”

“See that you do. You may go.”

I bowed, then turned to leave.

“And mister Aeron, thank you.”

I bowed again, then retreated from the room as fast as etiquette allowed. It was all I could do to keep from snarling. I had to keep a lid on it. Since my return from the dead I’ve been jumpy as a junebug on a hotplate, to borrow one of AJ’s countryisms. Yeah, apparently I had died. AGAIN! That’s strike two lady fate! Next time you better make it stick, because if not, then I’m coming for you and I’ll tan your hide.

The palace itself was not nearly as large as Celestia’s. The walls and floors were a warm sandy color, decorated with swirling patterns in white and gold that reminded me of Zecora’s cutie mark, or whatever it’s called on a zebra. Tribal mark? Who knows. Several walls were decorated with tapestries that showed a recurring tribal pattern. Speaking of tribal, the guards that were stationed every dozen or so meters along the corridors each carried an oval shield that had the same painted pattern on it. Each shield also held two javelins, and each guard carried a short spear. They wore very little armor, save for several gold rings on their legs, and a feathered helmet with an eye visor that reminded me more of a voodoo mask. They didn’t move their heads, but I could tell they were watching me like hawks. They pissed me off. On a conscious level I realised they were just doing their duty. But on a deeper, more primal level I just wanted to rip them all in half.

I walked faster.

Leaving the palace grounds behind me, I pushed my way through the crowded market. The bustling streets of the Zebrican capital were far more narrow and crowded than those of Canterlot, and certainly more than Ponyville. More often than I would like, I would find myself stuck in a particularly congested intersection where I was forced to wade my way through the crowd, knocking whither to whither with an assortment of creatures. At first I didn’t notice just how diverse the population was compared to Equestria. But upon paying just a bit of attention I noticed bison, ponies, antelope, wildebeest, diamond dogs, and of course zebra, all mingling together. An entire city of talking, civilized, animals. For a moment I felt like I was stuck in the world of Zootopia.

‘So many! So much prey! Wring their necks! Spill their blood! We hunger! We HUNGER!!’

I quickly broke away from the crowd, fighting to maintain control. To keep the bloodlust off my face. I found room to breathe in one of the little squares that were all over the city. This particular one held a large marble fountain depicting some famous character from history no doubt. I honestly couldn’t be bothered to find out more, instead I all but collapsed down, leaning my back against the hard marble, struggling to calm myself.

Whatever control I had over the beast in the past seems to have been completely eroded since I willingly gave it partial freedom all those weeks ago. All the work Zecora helped me with, the mental exercises she suggested, they were no longer cutting it. When I’m alone it’s a little easier to manage it, but in a crowd it takes every last ounce of will not to let the beast run rampant. These busy streets were so not helping the situation. Zecora would probably suggest I try meditative breathing. But since i don’t breathe like a normal person it doesn’t really help. So I’m reduced to repeating a little calming mantra in my mind over and over and over while thinking of Trixie. Thinking of her seems to help, and I’m so relieved that she’s gonna be okay. Right now she’s all that keeps me going.

I was so caught up in my own thoughts that I failed to noticed the coins that were casually being laid in my lap. It was the third plink that drew my attention. Looking down I saw that I had accrued a small pile of coins. They looked like bits, except they were octagonal instead of round.

‘I must look like a beggar, sitting here.’

I ignored the pile of coins and leaned my head against hard marble, allowing the sound of the running water to distract me. The rage was slowly ebbing away as i mentally focused on the mare i loved. If I could just stay here for a bit longer I might be able to...

“Sir?”

‘Oh fuck.’

I opened my eyes to find a uniformed zebra looking at me. Not a royal guard, but more like the city watch. The equivalent of the cities normal police force.”

“Sir?” The officer said, with what sounded like genuine concern in his voice. “With all due respect, you don’t look so good.”

Yeah, fuck you too mate. I’m trying my level best not to murder everyone within this square. Try it and see how good you look when you’re wrestling the mental equivalent of a shark with a machine gun.

“Sorry.” I responded with considerable effort.

“Do you need assistance?”

“No, I’m just resting a moment, I’ll be on my way soon.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.” I manage to keep the growl out of my voice.

“Alright Sir, have a good day.”

“Thank you.” I respond curtly.

As he moved off I allowed myself to relax. Only to realise my hooves were now sporting inch long claws that seemed to be dripping some kind of toxin. Merciful Luna If he had bothered me any longer I might have… The idea makes me feel sick. It’s a good thing I’m unable to vomit or I might have ruined the fountains water. I need to get the hell away from everyone. I got up and started moving off towards the hospital as fast as I could weave through the crowd. The pile of coins lay beside the fountain, forgotten.

********

The closer I got to the hospital the better I felt. Trixie was here, she would make it all better. That thought seemed to calm the beast’s wrath for the moment. I quietly made my way up the stairs and down the hall. I entered the hospital room only to find Trixie looking a tad apprehensive.

“Is something wrong, Trixie?” I asked as I sat down on the chair next to her bed.

She looked up from her thoughts, seemingly surprised at my sudden appearance. “Huh? No, nothing. Nothing’s wrong. Just… thoughts.”

“Ah, those. Buck em, they never lead to anything nice.”

I stepped up to the bed and gave her a gentle nuzzle. She returned it only half heartedly. I guess her whole ordeal has hit her harder than I realised. Not that mine has been a cakewalk, but I barely recall half of the shit I pulled in my rage fueled frenzy. She doesn’t have that luxury.

“Aeron, can we talk?” she said quietly.

Those words sent a jolt of panic down my proverbial spine. Whenever a girl speaks those words, nothing good ever follows. It’s like the verbal equivalent of throwing a live grenade into a room. If one ever utters those words to you, drop to your knees and beg forgiveness for whatever it is your stupid ass did wrong.

“I spoke to Bon Bon.” She said.

“What did she want?”

“The usual.Telling me you’re a danger. Trying to get me to help in convincing you to come back with her.”

“Not gonna happen.” I said resolutely.

“Yeah… that’s what Trixie figured.”

She was silent for a minute after that. But her expression remained tense as she stared into the middle distance. Finally she turned to me and asked: “Did you really torture a prisoner?”

I admit her question caught me off guard. After a moment of silence I could only tell her the truth. “...Yes.”

This was followed by another long pause. “How...how do you feel about that?”

“That dog was scum, long before he took you from me. The world is a little brighter without him.” I say coolly.

“Aeron....that’s...”

“Cold? Heartless? The actions of a ‘monster’? I’ve heard all this before.” I said with more bite then I intended. Her crushed expression was enough to know I went too far. “....I had to get you back.” I said sadly.

“Trixie is not going to pretend that those that took her and the others didn’t have a lot to answer for. Maybe even what they got in the end. But Trixie is more worried about how this is affecting you.”

“I’m...” ‘Fine’ was on my lips, but I couldn’t bring myself to say it. Trixie had brought me back from the brink, more than once. Right now, she was my anchor, my key to having a semblance of a normal life, where I didn’t need to be alone. Perhaps it’s unfair to do that to somepony, but if I was being truly honest, I was scared of what would happen if she wasn’t in my life. I’m adrift in a mostly unknown land, stuck in a form that has made me a pariah in most places. And the things I thought I knew turned out to be false. She was my lifeline, and I didn’t want to lose her.

“Aeron?”

“...I’m not sorry” I said quietly but strongly. “I’m not Celestia. I’m not going to stuff the problem in a closet somewhere and ignore it in the hopes that it will go away. I will never give an enemy the opportunity to come back another time and hurt the ones I love and care about. But I know...I can’t go on like this. Trixie, I’m losing control. I can barely go five minutes without feeling the overwhelming urge to…. To do something I’ll regret. I need help…. And I need you.”

“Well… we did come here for help, didn’t we?” she said, giving my hoof a squeeze. “But.. I want you to promise me something.”

“What’s that?”

“From this moment on, no more killing. Promise Trixie you will try to find a better way.”

“Trixie… I don’t know if I can promise that. I’m not fully in control here.”

“Well you better try. That is Trixie’s one condition. You have so much power, surely you can think of some way to stop somepony without resorting to killing them.”

What if she was right. But could I really stop? Did I even want to stop? I mean why should I? If someone gets in my way it’s their fault if they get crushed by my power. They are just prey.

Wait, what am I thinking!

I felt a sense of cold that chilled me to the bone. When did I become so callous about killing? Sure I’ve never shied away from letting my fists do the talking, but only after actual talking proved absolutely futile. Was Celestia right all along? Am I too far gone without even realising it? No, no I refuse to believe that.

I grasped Trixie’s hoof tightly. “Alright Trixie, I will try. Just… please don’t leave me. I can’t do this alone.”

“I won’t you big lug.” She said while giving me a nuzzle. “Trixie will never leave you. She dropped everything to come with you on this trip, horrible as the start turned out to be. But we’re together again. And Trixie will stay by your side.”

I couldn’t take it any more. I rose up and hugged her, clinging to her for dear life. The sensation of being so close to her was...like a precious gulp of air to a drowning man. Her warmth, her scent. I could sense the faint beat of her heart as it gently thumped against her chest. All of it like the sweetest ambrosia. I don’t understand how I’ve come to be so dependant on her so quickly. And right then I didn’t care one bit. She was there, and she was all that I needed.

We sat there in silence for a while, till one of the nurses came in to bring Trixie lunch.

*************

It was another three days before Trixie was finally released from the hospital. It was a relatively chilly morning, for Zebrican standards anyway, and Trixie and I were standing just outside the Equestrian embassy. I wouldn’t have bothered coming here, but Bon Bon apparently had a message for me, from Celestia herself.

“I will ask you one last time, please reconsider.”

“No.”

“But…”

“I said no, Bon Bon. I will not come back to Equestria with you. And I will not have anyone decide what is ‘best’ for me. Not even Celestia. I will not become one of her forgotten problems. She’s got enough skeletons from a thousand years ago lurking in her closet. I will not be another.”

Bon Bon let out a tired sigh. “I was afraid you’d say something like that.” She said as she hoofed me a scroll bearing the royal seal.

I took it hesitantly and unrolled it.

Aeron, if you are reading this scroll then agent Sweetie Drops has failed to persuade you to return and put yourself into my protective custody. As such I am left with no other choice. While I wish you no malice or harm, I must do whatever it takes to protect my little ponies from the danger you represent. Therefore, by royal decree, you are hereby banished from Equestria for all time. I am sorry it had to come to this. I hope you find happiness, wherever you may end up.

Princess Celestia.

Re-reading the paper for the fourth time I allowed the message to sink in. I’ve just been rejected by a fandom. Yeah okay, situation is a bit different here but in a nutshell that’s what’s happening. The flowing letters and apologetic platitudes, culminating in a “fuck you” message. Not gonna lie, it stung.

From over my wither I could see Trixie reading the letter herself, a hoof on my back tells me my expression was plain. ‘Banished for all time’. That line stuck out hard, leaving no wiggle room for debate or appeal. That’s it then. Looking up I tried to read Bon Bon’s expression, but her poker face was solid, it’s all business to her.

“I take it, you know what this is?” I said, my voice cracking a bit, despite my best efforts.

“Yes, the letter came with instructions.” She stated matter of factly, though I really do wonder which option she would of preferred. A hoof hovered subtly over her saddlebag, poised to hit me with something depending on my next reaction. Considering all that has happened, I really can’t blame her for being cautious. Doesn’t mean it irked me any less though.

Taking the letter I folded it in half, as if hiding the words written within would somehow make them feel less raw. I placed the scroll in my chest cavity for no other reason than to get it out of sight in a calm civilized way.

“I’m sorry it had to come to this.” She said, but the words felt hollow, to everypony.

The silence hung for a moment, then another. With nothing more to say, she turned to leave, but not before looking to Trixie. Trixie, met her gaze, then pulled me a bit tighter to her. ‘Thank you, Trixie. Just....thank you.’ The Agent, moved past us without another word.

My world was still reeling. I should’ve figured something like this would happen. It was always on the table, I suppose. But the finality of it? I want to be mad, but I’ve been mad for several weeks, this is the kind of pain the beast wouldn’t understand and care for. This hurt? This rejection? It’s all me. I reason that Twilight and the girls will do fine without me, hell, I know they will. I just hope, I haven’t mucked up the timeline too much.

“Bon Bon!” I said, causing her to pause in her steps. I turned around to see her look at me with the same cool expression.

Now that I have her attention, my mind is scrambling to try and find the right, subtle, not crazy way to put it.

“Take care of them.” I managed to piece together. “The girls, Spike...Ponyville.” God dammit, I barely got that out without choking.

Ever the professional, she remained stoic but granted us a solemn nod. “I will.”

I looked her straight in the eye. “And Shining Armor and Princess Cadence, too.” I hardened my expression, “Watch. Over. Them.” I said pointedly.

Across her mask there was a flicker of puzzlement at my last request. But she followed it with a nod. Would that be enough? At least for things to play out how they should? Maybe. Maybe not. All I knew was we were now on our own. My anger boiled over and I couldn’t help but fire a last parting shot.

“Now that I’m officially banished, I better not see you or any other Equestrian agents lurking about us ever again. Ever, you understand me?”

“Yeah, I’ll relay your message.” Bon Bon said stiffly.

“See that you do, cause if I spot them, and I will, they won’t like what happens. You tell Celestia, that if she wants to banish me, then you all better leave me the fuck alone from this point forward.” It was an empty threat born of anger, hurt and frustration. Besides, I promised Trixie to play nice after all. But she didn’t know that, and I felt just pissed off enough to leave the threat hanging in the air. Was it petty? Yes, petulant even. But at the time I didn’t care a single iota. I was feeling hurt and just wanted to lash out at something.

With a final, cautious nod, Bon Bon vanished into the embassy, leaving me alone with Trixie. Equestria was now lost to me, and with it the familiarity of scenery, familiar faces, and future events. We were now officially in uncharted territory, and if the past few weeks were any indication ‘here there be monsters’. Some closer than ever before. I mentally sighed. This had been about as much fun as rolling in salt after going a few rounds with a cheese grater.

“So… what now?” Trixie’s voice broke the oppressive silence.

“We go find Zecora’s mentor.” I said as I reached into myself to retrieve the map, and the scroll with directions Zecora had given me. When I pulled them out though I was in for a nasty surprise.

Both the map and scroll were completely unreadable, damaged by the seawater the ink had run, and there were several holes in both items as well. When the deep sea pressure crushed me, the water must have gotten to them too.

“Oh for fuck sake, can’t anything on this trip go right for once!” I spat as I threw the remains of the papers to the floor.

“Calm down.” Trixie said while putting a gentle hoof on my shoulder.

I just glared at the useless papers.

“The directions are completely ruined, but the map is still vaguely readable.” Trixie said as the carefully levitated both items and took a look at them. “We’ll just have to find another map to compare it with. It’s not so bad, I’m sure somepony around here has one.”

“With my luck they will charge us an arm and a leg for it.” I grumbled.

“Quit being a grumplepuss hun.” Trixie said while bumping me lightly with her hip. “Leave the haggling to the Great and Crafty, Trixie.”

“Haggling expert now are ye?”

“Oh ye of little faith, you should know by now that Trixie is a mare of a great many hidden talents.” She said with a smirk.

************

I won’t bore you with the details. Suffice to say we did eventually find a map. And Trixie was right, she’s a pretty good haggler. Better than I ever could be. Honestly it’s a bit of a lost art in the human world. At least in most places anyway. With the map in our possession, and a lot of patience, we were able to roughly figure out where to go. So just after midday we set out.

I insisted on carrying her saddlebags, since Trixie was still supposed to take it easy for a while, and the trip itself would be taxing enough. She protested, of course. But only a little. The first leg of our journey was easy, traveling along a wide dirt road. According to the map the journey would take at least six days. But I intended to once again walk throughout the nights. Letting Trixie sleep while I carried her.

The landscape around the capitol was a contrast of colors. Reddish earth and green trees, stretching ahead for several miles. Every once in awhile we would pass small settlements. No more than five or six little huts, and a small orchard or field of some sort attached to them. They were neither village nor farms, in the traditional sense. I honestly don’t know what to classify them as.

As the sun began to set on the horizon, I transformed into my centaur form. Making myself large enough to carry trixie with just one arm. She felt embarrassed at first, being carried around like a cat. But soon enough she settled in comfortably.

“This is actually kinda nice.” She said as she nibbled on some dried fruit.

“Glad you approve.” I said. “And I’m glad you’re here with me.”

“Face it, you would be utterly lost without the smart and resourceful Trixie around.” she replied with an insufferable smirk.

“Don’t make me tickle you.”

That made her sputter. “You wouldn’t dare.”

“Try me.” I said whilst making tickle motions with my free hand.

“Keep those spidery appendages away from Trixie.”

“Oh you asked for it.”

“Noooo!” She shrieked as I tickled her. Her protests dissolving into a fit of laughter.

“See what you get for being a braggart.” I scolded her with a smirk.

“Heeheehee! Uncle, uncle. Trixie surrenders. Hahaha.” She cried as she squirmed around in my grip.

Before long I halted my assault, letting her catch her breath.

“Did you learn your lesson?” I asked with a grin.

“Trixie will have her revenge.” she panted.

“I’m shakin’ in mah boots.” I quipped back, earning myself a light punch in the chest.

“Dork” She said with a saucy smile.

Before long the sky turned completely dark, and I had to rely on my magical senses to even see the road. The moon was barely a sliver of a crescent tonight.

***

I’ve been steadily moving forward for hours. The night itself was quiet save for the sound of crickets in the distance. Or whatever freakish insects they got here in Zebrica. Trixie moaned fitfully in her sleep. One of her ears twitched and her face turned into a grimace. She’s having another nightmare. She has many these days. I swallowed an angry growl as she quietly cried out in pain, mumbling about her cutie mark being ruined. My eyes are drawn to the scars on her flank, and I curse myself for not slaughtering Wasio Moja when I had the chance. I hope that whatever jail they’ve thrown him in is filthy, dark and infested with rats. It’s the least he deserves.

I gently ran my free hand across her flank, tracing the scars. They aren’t as prominent as before, thanks to the Zebrican doctors, but they will never truly fade completely. Part of me wants to wake her up, but she needs all the rest she can get, so I reluctantly let her sleep. She’s so soft and vulnerable like this.

I realise what I’m doing and yank my hand away as if it were on fire. Good thing she’s asleep. After a moment’s hesitation I reach for her again, this time gently stroking my fingers through her mane. I cursed silently at the lack of true sensation. Although I can feel things, the sensation is very different from what it was when I was human. It’s like touching the world with very thin gloves on. You can feel the details, but there’s something missing all the same. More like, the memory of a touch. Cursing my fate I picked up the pace, making sure not to rock her too much.

The sooner we get to this shaman, the better.

******

We completed the journey in just under four days. Halfway through the trip we ended back up in the dry lands. Which is strange, because according to Zecora her tribe lived near a lush jungle. The terrain before us however was as dry as a savanna during a drought. I could see the remains of what was once a forest, but the trees were all dry and shriveled looking. The village itself was a small collection of huts, surrounded by a low palisade. Outside of it was a collection of small farming fields and a tiny orchard. The crops and trees looked just as sickly and shriveled as the remains of the jungle a short distance away. Zebra were toiling in the dusty fields. Clearly this village had seen better days.

“Not exactly an oasis.” Trixie said quietly from beside me.

There were no guards at the gates, so we just passed right on into the village. Wherever we passed we earned ourselves some looks. Not surprising I suppose since I was still in my centaur form. But Trixie was getting plenty of looks as well. Appreciative looks that made me walk just a little closer to her. I could feel the beast stir, jealously guarding its mate. And I couldn’t help but feel the same jealousy. I barely kept myself from baring my teeth at any stallion who snuck a look at her.

As we approached the village square we were greeted by an older stallion.

“Greetings travelers, I am Uboni, leader of this village. What brings you to our humble home?”

“My name is Aeron, and this is Trixie.” I said with a wave of my hand, “I’ve traveled a long way to find the help of a skilled Zebra shaman. I heard one lives here.”

“You have come to seek the wisdom of elder Mashika?”

“You sound surprised.” I said.

“It is rare for outsiders to seek her council. Shaman aren’t as respected as they once were.”

“Yes well, she is the only hope I have. Can you take me to her?”

“I suppose I could do that much.”

“Your village has sure seen better days.” I said as we followed him.

“There are tough times all over Zebrica.” The old stallion clicked his tongue. “The drought has been spreading since last year. But we have survived here for generations. Eventually this dry spill will pass. It always does. We will weather it, as we have always done.”

He led us to a small hut at the far side of the village. It was decorated with masks and other fetishes. I could feel the power radiating from them. Like a veil hanging over the place. Outside was a rack, where bushels of herbs hung out to dry in the sun. With a small bow Uboni bid us goodbye and left. The air inside the hut was surprisingly cool. The smell of herbs and potions was thick in the air.

“Hello?” I called out.

“If my eyes do not betray, I have a visitor from far away.” Said a slightly raspy voice full of mischief.

As I turned in the direction of the voice, an old Zebra mare stepped out from the shadows. Her mane was as long as Fluttershy’s, and silver as the moonlight itself. Deep turquoise eyes stared at me from within a wrinkled face that is full of mirth. Golden rings decorated the old mare’s neck as well as both her front legs, and she carried a gnarled staff, covered in runes and decorated with strings full of beads.

“Are you elder Mashika, the shaman?”

“That is the name bestowed to me, and who, dear stranger, might you be?”

“My name is Aeron, This is Trixie. I’ve come a long way to seek your help, elder Mashika. I’m desperate.”

“A stranger seeking my aid is rare. How did you learn of this old mare?”

“From your student.”

“Zecora?” She gasped lightly.

“Yes. She tried to help me, and it worked for a time, but this problem is beyond her skills. So I came to find you instead.”

“Come and sit here by the light, and tell me all about your plight.” she said, motioning to the spot in front of her small fireplace.

And I did just that. Over the next two hours I told her everything. My arrival in Equestria, my transformation, my fight with the dragon, losing control. How Zecora pulled me back from the brink. Learning what my powers could do. And how it all eventually went to hell. Mashika never interrupted me. She simply listened attentively. Asking the occasional question only when I took a break in telling my story. When I finally finished my story she was silent for a long while before she finally spoke up.

“You see yourself at war with the beast, as separate as west and east.” She said.

“It IS a separate entity. It’s a bloody Timber Wolf spirit.”

“You are wrong, as was my student, such way of thinking is far from concludent. When the spirit tried to possess you in order to avoid its end, it became closer than any friend. It latched upon you to preserve its health, and found something that was most in sync with itself. From what I understand, these spirits know only torment. They understand anger, pain and discontent. So it latched on to those parts of you, and through them, made one from two”

“Are you saying we... fused?”

Mashika reached behind herself and pulled out two coconut halves. She then scooped some water from her cauldron into one of them.

“Gaze upon this simple bowl, see it as a coffer for thy soul. The water within, cool and clear, your vital spirit, held so dear.”

I nodded. She then scooped some water into the other one.

“When I pour this water into the other,” She said as she did so, “Are you able to tell which was already there, and which was another?”

“Of course not, water is water, it all becomes one big whole.” I said.

“And so it is, as is thy spirit. But, not solitary are we all, not even near it.”

“We are all but tiny parts of the cosmic whole; from towering tree to swaddled foal. And when our lives reach their culmination, we become part of the ethereal nation, the experiences and knowledge that we cherish, enrich and enhance the divinity, letting it flourish.”

“Forgive me but, I do not believe in such things.”

“Was not magic, to you once unknown?” She said with a cocky grin, “Yet here you are, wielding it like it was your own.”

“That’s different.”

“Whichever philosophy is right, is for the individual themselves to decide.”

“I think we’re getting off topic.”

She merely gave me an infuriatingly serene grin.

“So what must I do to be rid of this thing?”

“Still that remains the point you miss. There is no getting rid of something that is part of this.” She motioned to my chest.

“Such an act would be akin, as trying to remove one’s own limb. The harm it would cause would utterly compound; instead, I suggest, an alternative round. Deny this part of you, no longer. Accept it as one with you will make you the stronger. The more you try and make believe, that bad are these feelings as you perceive. Anger, pain; they feed the beast, thus this split between you must cease.”

She refilled the second coconut.

“You dam them up like water at first, they swell and grow, until your wall will burst.”

She poured the water into the other coconut until it overflowed.

“Anytime your temper fumes, when you get angry, your emotions mushroom, expanding out, wild and denied, because they are alien in your mind, when in truth they are not new, but always have had root in you.”

“You’re saying, I did this to myself? That it’s MY fault?”

“So long as you see that part of you, you call ‘the beast, that doth intrude’, the longer you shall create a valance that shall prevent you from finding balance. Never find the control or peace you crave. So to put it bluntly, yes, I’m afraid.”

“Fuck you!” I screamed, feeling absolutely livid, “I didn’t ask to become some goddamned monster that scares the piss out of everyone, including myself. I don’t want to be some horror that stalks through the dark, feasting on every goddamn innocent soul it finds. How dare you suggest this is my fault! I’m a fucking human being! I’m not a....”

Mashika’s staff lightly tapped me on the head, a wave of calm washed over me. I stopped, and realised what I was doing. I was only a foot or so away from her. my hands morphed into claws. Claws that were only inches away from tearing her throat out. Yet she sat there, calm as can be, as if nothing out of the ordinary had happened.

“I.... I’m sorry..... I’m so sorry.” I said with pure horror. Barely able to get the words out as I realised what I’d almost done. Mentally I was pretty much hyperventilating at that point.

“It’s alright, sit, before you give the others a fright” She beckoned with a hoof.

I felt sick. I just wanted the earth to swallow me up and disappear. Which wouldn’t be impossible with my powers. But I didn’t

“Please… I’m sorry….. please….. please help me.” I croaked.

“You must help yourself, dear Aeron. I can only show the path that you must walk there in.”

I stared at the floor. unable to look her in the eyes. I realised I was crying when the first drops of green water hit the wooden floor. “I’m afraid.” I sobbed. “I’m afraid that if I let this thing in, really let it in, I won’t be myself anymore. I’ve already lost everything else. I don’t... I don’t want to change any further. I don’t want to lose anything else. I..... I don’t want to disappear.”

“Dear boy, you shall not, the revelation is not what you thought.” she reached out and placed a hoof on my cheek. “As you keep saying you wish to keep it out and away, but the truth be that it’s already here to stay. Separate from you? Don’t be blind! You and it are already intertwined, and has it changed who you truly are? I believe not, by far.”

“You are you, and you know it the most. All you are fighting now is a ghost. A monster you yourself hath devised, from your own fear, pain and anger that you despise. It’s time to stop fighting. Cease clawing your wounds, and finally let them heal, and that includes embracing the spirit, and then you will see that there was nothing to fear, and you will be free

But… it’s evil.” I said quietly.

“Is that what you fear? Because you believe it will make your virtue unclear?”

I nodded weakly. “I realise that makes me sound like a hypocrite, considering some of the things I’ve done… but…”

“Child, nothing in this world can make you evil. Evil is a choice, not some dramatic upheaval. No wizard, or totem, or crazed postillion can change what you are and make you a villain.”

“What about Discord?”

“Bah, the trickster spirit cannot truly change what is inside, no matter how deranged. He can only bend on what lies beneath. For all of us have the capacity he seeks; to be cruel, to lie, to cheat and to cause harm. Just as we are capable of being kind and warm. To help and to heal. But that doesn’t make us so, unless we choose to do these things, as you must know.”

I nodded.

“As for the spirit, it’s tormented, in pain, and it flails at the world in anger most plain. But just like you it is capable of more; feelings of kindness, tenderness, if one can show it the door. It has simply been in pain for so long it’s forgotten, it’s grown bitter and wild, lost and rotten. When you accept it as part of you, it too can finally heal, and begin life anew.”

“So you’re saying…. that I have to show it kindness?”

“An act of the heart, would indeed be a good start.”

I pondered her words. Where would I even start. Do I simply start talking to myself and hope the beast listens?

“You are thinking of how to tackle this problem best, might I suggest a vision quest.”

“Vision quest?”

“A spiritual journey into your own mind may reveal the secrets you wish to find.”

“How does it work, what do I do exactly?

“There is a place of magic I have not visited for a long, long while, the perfect spot for you and it to finally reconcile. It is there your quest may begin, and hopefully end the strife within.”

“Where is this place exactly?”

She pointed her staff at the window. “At the horizon is what you seek, a very special mountain peak. A place to which evil is anathema, it is called, the hoof of Zebrica.”

We traveled to said mountain that same afternoon, for I did not wish to waste any more time. Time in which the beast could slip from my tenuous grasp. I learned the mountain was called the hoof, because when looked at from above, it was shaped like a horseshoe. The trip to the foot of the mountain surprisingly didn’t take all that long. The climb up was a different matter. The terrain was steep, and the path narrow. I was surprised by how easily Mashika navigated it. For a mare who looked to be a hundred years old at least, she was a spry old bat. Trixie walked beside me as often as the path would allow. I noticed she brought some saddlebags along.

“Whatcha got there?” I asked, trying to make conversation and calm the nerves I felt.

“Trixie brought some materials and a sewing kit. Mashika said this might take hours. So trixie figured she would use the time to sew a new cape.”

I blinked. “I hadn’t realised you made your own outfit.”

“Of course. As Trixie keeps reminding you, she is a mare of many talents.”

“I really should learn not to underestimate you huh?”

“Yes, yes you should.” She nodded sagely.

We continued following the path as it wound upwards, following the curve of the mountain, until we reached a small plateau in the middle, what would form the frog on an actual hoof. I may not like heights, but I had to admit the view from here was breathtaking. We could see around for miles and miles from here. We could easily see the little village in the distance. There was something about this place. It felt unnaturally serene. But there was something else to it too. I could feel it, beneath the earth, deep beneath the mountain.

“From the surprise that you express, I reason you can feel it, yes?”

“What is that?” I asked.

“What you sense below my friend, is the leylines that from this mountain extend. Where the world of spirits is thin, and magic burns bright, from here you will journey to meet what is inside.” She said, tapping my chest.

“How long will this take?” I asked.

“That I fear I cannot say, it will take as long as it may. For some an hour, for others a day.”

“I don’t know about this.” I said, my apprehension growing.

Last time I was alone in my mind with the beast, things didn’t end well, and it took Zecora to get me out. I really don’t want to go for a second round. A shiver went down my spine. I musn’t be afraid, fear is the mind killer. Oh who am I kidding, I’m fucking scared as hell. Not so much for myself, but for what I stand to lose if this doesn’t work. My eyes are briefly drawn to Trixie. Who smiles at me encouragingly from where she’s taken a seat on a flat topped boulder. I do the mental equivalent of taking a deep breath.

“How do I begin?”

Mashika smirks. “Normally one would meditate for a day, but since you are different, let me help you on the way.”

Before I can ask what the smirk is all about, the runes on her staff glow and she bops me on the forehead with its tip. My world goes dark as I experience the sensation of falling. Damn you, you crazy old goat.

***

I find myself standing in front of a forest. I look down at myself, and see that I’m once again human. Though my shape isn’t really me. Not like the first time. It’s a more generic human shape. For a moment a sensation of fear runs up my spine. Am I forgetting myself? I must be, I’ve been Aeron the plant creature so long my mind can’t even recall what my body used to look like. I look at the forest before me. It’s dark and foreboding. And I have no desire to set foot in it. Which is exactly what makes it the one fucking place I obviously need to go. Joy.

A shiver crawls down my spine as I move forward. Every step makes me feel like it’s my last. I realise I don’t have a physical heart anymore, yet here in the realm within my own mind I feel it thumping against my chest in a rapid staccato. I’m being stalked.

The beast has been free since I returned from the dead. I wish I could remember what happened after I died, but it’s like someone has taken that part of my memory and simply plucked it out. Perhaps mortal minds simply weren’t meant to remember the afterlife. Why am I thinking about this? That’s not why I came here. I don’t want to think about this. I don’t want to think about death. I’ve been on the receiving end too many times already. I…

I’m back there. Timberwolves biting me. Wooden teeth as hard and sharp as steel slicing through my arm. Blood soaking my tattered clothes. NO! Please, I don’t want to remember this. Growling fills my ears. Jaws descending towards my face. One fang piercing my eye. A tortured scream cutting through the night. My tortured scream. More growling. That growl isn’t a memory.

My head snaps up, the beast appears from the bushes. Black as night and as large as a full grown lion. Its eyes red with madness. So much hate, and…. pain. I see it, my own pain reflected in its eyes. A memory calls to me, but not mine.

I am running, running through the forest. The sunlight streams through the treetops. My nose low to the ground, a smell spurs me on. The scent of prey. There are others. To my left, a wolf runs, its coat is grey with beige on the underside. We chase the scent together. Another joins us from the opposite side, this one has an almost white coat, with a darker stripe along the spine. A howl reaches our ears, and we respond in kind. The pack has caught the prey. We find them soon, we join the feast. The alpha eats first, for that is the way. I await my turn and when it comes I eat my fill. There is no malice towards the prey. It is what it is, all part of the way, as it was before, as it will be later, for the way is good.

The memory shifts. For a moment I see but white, then a new scene unfolds. A den opening lies before me. I inch closer to it, wary of what lies within. A wolf lies there, nursing three pups. When she sees me look she bares her teeth at me in warning. These are mine, do not touch them. The message is loud and clear. I slink back with a whine.

The memory shifts again. This time the forest is burning. I try to run, find a safe haven, but the flames are everywhere. There is no way out. I cower beneath a gnarled tree while above me two creatures are fighting. I can barely make out their shapes. They tower over the forest like mountains. Words reach my ears.

“You have won nothing. One day I shall return, and claim what is mine. Until then I leave your world a parting gift!”

My world explodes with pain. A wave of dark magic washes over me. My fur catches fire, It spreads lightning quick. I whine and cry, I try to run, but my lungs are scorched. I collapse under the gnarled tree. It too is burning. With a crack it collapses, its weight comes down on me, crushing me. I know no more.

I awake, pain and hunger gnaw at me. My body is not what it once was. I am a wolf, but also a tree. I hunger. I search for prey. The forest is all wrong. It used to be lush and green with nice scents. Instead it’s dark and twisted and it stinks. After hours of searching I find prey. The sight of it fills me with anger. I chase it, it tries to flee, but it doesn’t get far. My jaws descent and blood runs across my tongue. It doesn’t taste like anything. The flesh I consume does not satisfy me. I am still hungry. Its driving me mad. So hungry. It hurts. More prey, I need more prey. I consume everything I can find. Still the hunger persists. Why? This is not the way.

I snap out of the memory, finding myself lying on my back with the beast looming over me. My first instinct is to punch it in the snout and throw it off. But Mashika’s words echo through my mind. “An act of kindness would be a good start.”

I reach out towards it. It growls and snaps its jaws closed around my arm. The teeth sink into my flesh and I cry out in pain. My first instinct is to jerk back, to defend myself. I raise my free fist to punch it, make it let go. Its shaking me violently, and the pain shooting up my arm is making me scream. I grit my teeth, holding back. It lets go of my arm and lunges for my face. I bring up my other arm just in time. The jaws slam shut around it and if I was capable of throwing up I might have. It all feels so very real.

“What is real? How do you define real?” Morpheus voice comes to mind.

I have no time to dwell on that as the beast releases my other arm, only to come back for a second attempt. I have to do something, so I meet it head on. Tackling it to the ground. It’s so much bigger than me. I cling to it as it bucks and kicks, writhes and twists, trying to throw me off. Its jaws snap shut right next to my face. I press my chin into its neck so it can’t reach me and hold on for dear life. It growls and howls, refusing to yield. I cling tighter. We roll and roll across the ground. A flailing mass of limbs and fur. It almost throws me off twice. I don’t have a clue what to do anymore, so I just do something stupid. I shift position slightly to give myself more room, lean in towards its head, and clamp its ear between my teeth. It yelps, first in surprise, then in actual pain. It struggles harder, I grind my teeth together and it yips.

“Yield.” I snarl without moving my jaw. The words come out mangled thanks to the ear in my mouth, but the message seems to have been received. Because the beast struggles noticeably less. I let go of the ear. The beast twists its head to look at me. Baring its teeth in challenge.

Another memory floods my vision.

I am a challenger. The alpha of the pack has grown old. It is time for new blood to lead. He waits for me, standing on the high ground. He’s trying to look imposing, but we can smell the inflammation that’s making his old bones ache. He knows his time is up. I bare my teeth in challenge, and he responds in kind. We circle each other, waiting for the right moment. Now! I lunge, teeth snapping. I am fast, but he is experienced. His teeth sink into my neck, he shakes me by the scruff, But I do not yield. I bite his leg, going for the tendons. I must have hit a sore spot. He lets go of me and I turn swiftly to bite his neck. A few drops of blood fill my mouth. Their taste spurns me on. The alpha falls, exposing his neck. He yields. I wait for him to get up, then I charge him. He runs, tail between his legs. He is no longer welcome in this pack. He slinks away into the underbrush, wounded and alone. It is sad, but this too is the way, and it is good. Every wolf understands.

The memory fades, the beast lunges for my throat. I bring my arm up. The jaws crush down on it. I bite through the pain and twist my shoulder. Exposing the beast’s neck. I bite down on it. It’s a pathetic little bite on such a big neck. But the message is clear. Yield!

The beast struggles intensify. It whines and howls and snaps its jaws, but I don’t let go. It feels like I’ve been here for hours. My jaw hurts, my teeth feel like they are being pulled out. But I do not let go. Finally its struggles lessen, and then it rolls over, whining piteously. The beast yields. I’ve beaten it in a way that it understands. Like the alpha before it, it too has grown old and tired and in pain. It craves release, but thanks to the curse it cannot die.

I see it now. At the heart of the Everfree stands a grove of cursed trees. The site where Grogar’s blood first spilled. Whenever a timberwolf is destroyed, their spirit is pulled back to these trees, to be trapped in a new seed. Trapped in an endless cycle of hunger and pain from which they cannot escape. As the seed rots away due to the entropy, the spirit within experiences agony. Much in the way I feel pain when my core is damaged. They have been in that state since the Everfree first existed. Since way before Celestia’s time. Thousands of years of endless pain and hunger. No wonder they are mad.

Now I understand why the spirit tried to bond with me. It was looking for a way out. It clung to me so it would not have to go back.

My vision returns as I let go of the beast’s neck. I see it in a different light now. No longer a vicious black mass of hate and spite the size of a lion. Instead it’s just a normal looking wolf. Its coat is grey, and it looks old. Its eyes stare at me piteously. It reminds me of my dog. Whatever hate I used to feel for this creature evaporates. I just feel sad for it. To exist that long and only know pain and agony… no animal deserves that. What sort of twisted entity does such a thing.

“Grogar the Destroyer.” says an icy voice at the back of my mind.

I lean forward, extending a hand. The beast shies away at first, ears flat and growling. I hold and wait, keeping a relaxed posture. It looks at me hesitantly. Time passes, and neither of us moves. Then the beast slowly sniffs my hand before it finally leans into it. I pet it carefully and It whines softly. It looks tired.

“Rest now.” I say as gently as I can. “You’ve earned it.”

***

“At last.” Mashika said, looking up from where she was meditating.

Trixie looked up from where she was working on sewing a new cape. “What is it?”

She looked towards Aeron, seeing tears leak from his closed eyes. Something was happening. Light began to spread from where he was sitting. Like glowing roots spreading through the earth.

“What’s happening?” Trixie asked.

“Convergence.” Said Mashika.

“What do you mean?”

“The time has come, for him and the spirit to be truly as one.”

***

I awoke from my vision quest, changed. My mind felt so clear, and with it came a renewed connection to the world. I felt the ley lines below, throbbing with power. It’s the same energy I draw on when I take power from the earth, but it’s concentrated, pure. I could feel it singing to me in a low bass hum. Like the heartbeats of the world. But they felt off, like something was blocking or obstructing them. I focused on the energy flow and felt it respond to my mental touch. It was like greeting an old friend you haven’t seen in ages. Different, yet familiar all the same.

As I tapped into the pure power of the leylines my mind expanded outwards across the arid landscape. I felt it, lurking out there. The spark of life. Billions and billions of seeds. Patiently waiting for that nudge. I shifted my sight into my magical vision, the dry savanna lit up before me like a brilliant field of stars. It called out to me. I also felt water, deep underground where it served little purpose. Everything around me hummed. Its was if I could hear a song on the wind. Something stirred within me. It was the beast, but it was different too. No longer was it a separate entity. It was always part of me, but now, we were as one. It no longer fought me to dominate my psyche. It was simply another part of the whole that is me. I would describe it better, but I have not the words to truly do the sensation justice. But I could feel its elation like a fluttering in my chest as it responded to the song of the world. I raised my arm as said song reaches its crescendo. Green arcs of electricity danced along my body, rising from my feet along my limbs, to arc between my fingertips. My vision shifted back into my regular sight, and I looked at the dry and sad land before me, then uttered a single word.

“Bloom.”

***

Trixie and Mashika stared in awe. Before their eyes the mountain erupted into life. Grasses and flowers, even little trees sprang forth from the ground. The wave of green raced down the mountain. Blossoms and pollen filled the air, dancing on the wind. Further and further the lush green carpet spread. Wilted trees bloomed anew. Dried up ponds filled with water that rose up from deep underground. Far and wide it spread, all the way to the village on the horizon. The sad looking crops in the fields grew full and strong, brilliant colored fruits popped forth on every tree as the scent of blossoms and flowers filled the air. The children of the village stared in awe at all the food. The adults turned their gaze towards the mountain in wonder.

***

The energies stored in the leyline were spent for the moment, but they once again flowed free. No longer obstructed by whatever unseen power was blocking them. The effect stopped, and I lowered my arm. I felt… tired, yet exhilarated. For a single moment, no longer than it takes to draw a breath, I was one with the land. Truly one. It’s only then that I noticed Trixie and Mashika staring at me.

“By the great Circle,” Mashika gasped, apparently so shocked she forgot to rhyme. “Are you... a God?”

I shook my head and smiled. “I honestly don’t know what I am anymore, but a God I am not. And if I ever dare claim otherwise I hope someone conks me across the head for letting my ego run rampant.” I said waving my arm at the mountain.”It’s this place. I used all the stored energy here to give the land a boost. Using my own body as a conduit to bypass the blockage in the ley network. Now that the energies of the leyline flow freely again the land should remain as it is. As it should be.”

Come to think of it, it’s not unlike the crystal heart holding back the northern weather. I wonder if the city is build over the ley network as well.

“Aeron.” Trixie’s voice drew my attention. “How do you feel? Are you… you?”

I knelt before her. Reaching out with a hand to gently cup her face. “Yes, my beautiful little magician.” I said before leaning in and kissing her lips. She seemed surprised, but didn’t pull away. I kept it short and tender, yet tried to put as much feeling as I could into that one kiss. I pulled away, staring into her eyes.

“She was right. I thought I understood, but I was so wrong. And I’m sorry, for everything. I promise I will do anything to make it better from now on.”

Her eyes turned glassy as tears gathered and she leapt at me, crushing me in a hug. I grabbed onto her and returned the hug with similar intensity. I am free. Free to give her the love and attention she deserves. Free to finally make a life for myself. For us.

Together.