I am Octavia... I am alone...
“You hurt me now, but I won’t cry, I am Octavia,” the grey mare on stage sung out in front of the crowd. “You hurt me now, but I won’t cry,” her words trailing off into the auditorium as he last note from her cello fell silent.
The mare stood motionless on stage, head hung low, tears falling from her eyes as the crowd cheered for her. There would be no encore tonight though as she carefully placed her cello onto her back, and walked off stage to her dressing room.
As she entered the room she tossed the cello aside, not caring what might have happened to it, and walked over to her boudoir. She tapped her phone, 6 unread messages, 4 missed calls, the notification window informed her. Swiping into the phone she opened the messaging app and began to read them.
Contact: Vinyl.
Tavi pick up.
Come on Tavi, answer the phone.
Octavia, I’m sorry.
Octavia, please answer.
Look, I’m sorry. I’m coming to the concert hall right now.
Octavia, I’ll make this up to you, come on.
Octavia tapped out of the messages and opened her voice mail. “Please enter your password followed by the pound sign,” the automated voice instructed her. Octavia entered her password, the day and month she first meant Vinyl. “You have 3 new messages. First unheard message,” the automated voice said.
“Tavi, I’m sorry call me back,” Octavia pressed the number to delete the message. “Octavia, I’m heading to the concert hall. I’ll be there soon.” Octavia could hear the rain from outside in the background. “Octy, I’m almost there. Come on please answer. I’m so sorry. I hope I didn’t miss the st-” Vinyl was cut off by a loud thud and the sounds of a cart tumbling before the message cut out.
Octavia’s heart sunk, the last message was received only a few minutes ago. Oh Celestia no, she thought before running out of her dressing room and for the entrance of the concert hall. Please oh please be okay.
Octavia pushed her way through the crowd that was now formed outside. Upon making it to the front she saw two medic ponies wheeling white mare with an electric blue mare, into the back of an ambulance. No Celestia, please no. “Vinyl,” Octavia yelled as she tried to run to the ambulance, only to be stopped by a police mare.
“Ma’am, you have to step back,” the police mare said while having difficulty holding back Octavia.
“Let me go! That’s my friend,” Octavia shouted, pushing against the police mare.
“Ma’am, I’m sorry,” the police mare said. “Why don’t you come with me? I’ll take you to the hospital.”
Octavia collapsed into the police mare, crying. After a few minutes the police mare finally calmed Octavia down and was able to get her to the hospital where they were taking Vinyl.
“Can we make a stop beforehand,” Octavia asked. “I’d like to pick her up some flowers.”
“Sure,” the police mare responded.
“We had a fight,” Octavia explained. “I called her to make sure she was still coming to my recital tonight and she completely forgot about it. I sighed, said it was fine. It wasn’t tough. In fact, I actually told her, I told her the relationship was over, I was tired of it.” The police mare with still with Octavia, she felt it was best to not leave her alone.
“She sounded surprised. I was a bit myself. She said ‘No, I’ll make it up to you, we’ll… we’ll go to that restaurant you like.’ That’s always what she said to me when she did this. I always went to each of her shows. I can’t even remember the last time she came to one of my recitals.” Octavia tossed the roses she was holding onto the chair next to her. “I’m such an idiot,” Octavia berated herself.
“No, no. You had every right to say that,” the police mare consoled Octavia.
Tears started flowing from Octavia’s eyes again. “But if I hadn’t said it, if I’d just kept my mouth shut she wouldn’t have gotten in that accident,” Octavia said between breaths.
“Don’t you dare blame yourself for this. What happened tonight is not yo-” the police mare was cut off by the doctor coming out of the operating room.
Octavia jumped out of her seat. “Well, is she okay?”
The doctor’s head hung low. “I’m sorry we did everything we could. She didn’t make it though. Internal bleeding was too severe, both the heart and lungs were too badly damaged.”
Octavia stopped listing even though the doctor kept talking. She fell to the floor and started sobbing.
Octavia walked into the funeral hall, she couldn’t stop the tears from coming out. Octavia went to the open casket and placed a single white rose on Vinyl. She stood at the casket for what seems like an eternity to her before going over to her cello set up to the side.
Octavia was asked to give the eulogy but she couldn’t think of the words to say. Instead she decided to write a piece of music as the eulogy. Propping herself up against the cello; Octavia began to play. The first few notes were long, drawn out, low notes. Quickly the song changed and Octavia started playing very fast notes, purposely sounding harsh and angry. Octavia continued with that pace for a minute then just like that she stopped and took a seat with the other ponies at the funeral. A few others went up and said their piece but Octavia didn’t listen to any of them. The entire time she still does not stop thinking how this was all her fault.
It was a few hours after the burial before Octavia finally realized she was still standing at the gravestone. Wiping the tears from her eyes, Octavia decided it was time to go home. Before she left, she placed a golden ticket on the gravestone for her next recital.
Concierto De Octavia – ‘I am Octavia… I am alone…’ – Admit One.
“I am so sorry.”
