What A Horrible Weapon He Wields

by Hazardus_Havard

Rating: teen
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Random, Human
Length: 1902

The ponies of Ponyville grew fearful of a being that lived among them. Wielding the weapons of his people, will they finally band together and claim victory over him once and for all? Or be shot down in defeat?

The ponies of Ponyville grew fearful of a being that lived among them. Wielding the weapons of his people, will they finally band together and claim victory over him once and for all? Or be shot down in defeat?

Published 2016-01-13 21:50:02 UTC
Last updated 2016-01-13 21:50:02 UTC

Chapter 1

It was another beautiful day in Ponyville. Many of the ponies wore smiles as they walked about their day. It felt like another usual day for the inhabitants of this little town. Off in the corner of a building was a pony, looking suspicious as she walked in the shadows. Attempting to sneak her way to a stand, and failing, the pony lifted her head, staring at the stand’s owner. All around her was a gathering of ponies, all there for the same reason as her.

“What exactly do you think we should do, Brownie?”

Said pony looked at the worried faces that crowded around him. Humming, he closed his eyes, taking a moment to himself. “I believe that we need to somehow… remove his weapons from him.”

Nervous whispers spread amongst the slowly growing crowd. A head popped up, speaking loudly, “And just how exactly do you think we can achieve such a thing? There’s nothing we can do with that blasted thing he holds!”

It was true, none of them dared to challenge the being that had sent most of their town into a panic. Some have attempted and triumphed in becoming close to him, but even they were still at risk. It didn’t matter if it was his closest friends or a stranger; if they upset him in any way, he would deal with them in the same manner: Shooting them. He appeared to have a quick temper to the ponies, anything seemingly riling him up.

“Then the obvious solution is to take his weapon from him,” Brownie said. “Without them, he is powerless.”

Most of the ponies murmured to one another. It was something that many had considered, but the terror dwelling in them prevented them from acting; for fear of retaliation, for fear of what would happen should they fail.

“How are we supposed to take it from him?” a pony asked. “We’ve seen what happens to those that attempt such things!”

The crowd quiets down hearing that. Many have pursued such actions before in the past. They quickly ended with a pony struck down, one after the other.

“C-can we just leave him alone?” a pony in the front asked to the crowd. “It’s not good to rile him up.”

Brownie spoke out, “Roma, we need to stop this once and for all! Surely even you can see that?”

“I… I just don’t want to see anyone else get hurt! M, my uncle is still at the hospital because he had tried to take his weapon himself!” The pony wiped her eyes as the crowd remained silent. “He’s lucky to have gotten away after being shot!” Roma broke down crying after that.

The hushed voices rose up once more, having doubts to whatever Brownie was planning. Many ponies in the crowd knew of someone involved with a past shooting. They did not want the same to happen to them.

“We should give this up and leave him alone,” Roma said loud enough for them all to hear. “He only attacks if he is annoyed or feels threatened after all. If we stay out of his way, things will be fine for us.”

The crowd had grown larger and larger, the curiousness of the ponies gravitating to them. After hearing Roma, they started to agree with her words, not wanting the same fate as those before them.

Brownie cleared his throat to gain their attention once more. “I am afraid that is not an option any longer.”

“And why is that?” a pony in the crowd spoke up.

He stared directly at the crowd, “Because the princess has decided to intervene in his affairs.”

Hearing that, the crowd grew silent. Then, their faces sported smiles as they realized what this meant for them. Everyone started to cheer and laugh at this. Brownie merely shook his head.

“That’s fantastic news!” another pony yelled out.

“NO!” Brownie screamed, shutting their laughter and cheers down. “She was NOT here to stop him in any way!”

“…Then why is she here?” a shaky voice asked.

Brownie hung his head, hating to be the bearer of bad news. “She was here… to set up plans for him to create more of his vile weapons for her own use.”

No one spoke after the pony said that. It took a moment for many of them to process things. Their faces started to pale in realization of what he said. Many of them could not believe that the princess would do such a thing, wanting such horrid creations for herself.

“You lie!” a voice cracked out.

“I speak the truth!” Brownie shot back. “She had heard of how effective these ‘guns’ of his are against not just us but any who stand against him: Ponies, griffons, minotaurs, and anything else that may challenge him, it not mattered at all with his guns! He has beaten down foes many times his size with but a small tool that easily fits into his softened claws. And with such praise the princess held for him! She wishes to commission more for her guards, and in thanks she forgave him of his past actions!”

Brownie wasn’t sure what to do, frightened when he had found this by accident. He was taking a stroll in the woods a few days ago when he came across them. Hiding behind cover, the pony saw that the princess had demanded to know what was going on between him and the ponies. Word of what was happening had finally reached the castle walls and she came down immediately.

At first, Brownie was hopeful that she would finally take the human away and banish his weapons. But then the human showed Princess Celestia his weapons and how easy they were to use. Once she saw his tools, she looked… thrilled, excited at what was in front of her. She was eager to have them in her arsenal and was willing to deal with the demon. His hopes died there, seeing how she wanted her troops to be packing such weaponry around for her own needs.

Brownie had retold what he saw in the forest involving the two, hoping to stir them into action. “We must act now before things get out of hoof!” Brownie screamed to the crowd. “Alone, many have fallen to his vile acts, but together we are strong! As a pack, we can overpower him at his home and take his weapons to finally put an end to things!”

The ponies agreed to what he had said. If they did not go there to take them, they would all forever live with the regret of never trying.

“What about the princess?” a pony asked. “She will find out about this. Is it really something we should risk against her?”

Brownie stood strong, holding his chest up high to the crowd, “I would rather incur the wrath of our princess than deal with a future involving that human’s weapons!”

They felt something in those words, like it was something that would help their fates. All attempts against the human had failed because they were alone! They had no one to help them in their time of need! But now, together as one, they could take him down and destroy his weapons once and for all!

Ponies marched down the street, Brownie leading the charge to the human’s house. Located on the outskirts of the town, it took some time for them to reach it. Standing outside of his home, the ponies kept were uncertain of what laid inside.

“Should we send some of us in to look around?” a pony asked. “We don’t even know if he’s in there so we may be able to just… sneak in and grab them.”

Brownie shook his head, “He rarely leaves, and when he does he tends to take his weapons with him for protection. Our only chance is to go in all at once and face him off together!”

They shared nods of agreement. Brownie had the pony’s crowd around, aimed at the house and ready for action. “On my word, we all charge through his door and through the windows. The ponies in front will hold him down while the others will take his guns and flee the place immediately.”

Thoughts ran through the ponies heads at their current situation. Many thought that this was finally it, the end of his tyranny and abuse. They could go back to their lives once more without the threat of provoking the wrath of the human hanging over their heads. None of them seemed to care what the princess may think about what they were doing.

“Ready…” The ponies reared back. “GO!”

At once, they charged forward. The door slammed open with the ponies barging in through it. The window smashed in as the ponies dashed ahead. Ponies flooded the house, trying to get in to help in some manner. They all immediately stopped, their hopes dying quickly, staring at what was in front of them.

It was the human, armed to the teeth with his weapons holstered around his body. There was not one that they thought he owned, but many. He held a rather large one in both of his hands, something they had never seen before. A new weapon they had no experience with.

“You ponies didn’t think I couldn’t see or hear you outside my windows did you?” He aimed the gun at the closest pony, that being Roma. Her pupils shrank, looking down the barrel of the gun. A large smile adorned his face seeing that. “I had been saving this one for when the princess came back, but I think a showing right now would be good for us all don’t you think?”

The ponies tried running but he was quicker with his trigger. He unleashed a righteous fury upon the infiltrators that tore apart his home. None thought to run outside, too scared out of their wits to think clearly.

Their wails of agony in the chaotic storm were pure bliss to the mass shooter. Some had cowered off to the side, hoping it would be over soon. The human grinned, saving them for last. A few attempted runs at him, though most ran in circles unsure what to do. They were all shot with ease.

And then, it was over. Their multicolored bodies littered across the floor after the massacre, dripping wet from what had transpired. Some whimpered out, clearly not done in like the others. He shot additional passes at them until they too quieted down.

Letting out a sigh, he walked over to the pony, nudging it with his foot. It started to stir, getting up from the ground. All of a sudden, realization dawned on the pony, tasting what was in its mouth.

“Oh sweet Celestia, th-there’s lemon in iiiiit!” A pony started to spit at the air, trying to clear her mouth. Many more followed suit, trying to clear their mouths of the sourness.

“There’s no sugar in it either!”

“You monster!”

Hearing that, he aimed his gun once more at them. They all screamed, running out the door and through the windows, hoping to flee the blasts from the human.

“And don’t come back or I’ll get out a bigger soaker for all of you!” He shook his fist to the sky at the ponies that ran away. “Stupid ponies…”