Eternal Embers

by Esipode

Rating: everyone
Tags: Tragedy, Sad
Length: 13509

Life isn't always easy, especially when you live thousands of years.

Follow Spike's long life through the centuries, as he handles trials and tribulations he didn't know he had the stomach to face.

(Small Author's Note: The idea of Spike growing up isn't exactly a new concept in fanfic writing, but I had yet to see one about his years of growing, rather than setting the story after he had already lived for centuries/millenniums. Besides, it's a sad, tragic story. You know you love that.)

This is my first fanfic attempt, so critiques are highly recommended. (Although, if you're going to tell me what I did wrong, at least give me a way to improve. Don't just point out flaws.)

Published 1970-01-01 00:00:00 UTC
Last updated 2011-12-04 22:53:41 UTC

Chapter One

Eternal Embers

Chapter One

“But she can’t just leave!” Twilight Sparkle let out a heavy sigh. She had grown tired of having the same argument with the baby dragon every day for the past week. She knew he wouldn’t take the news well, but at least she thought he would try to think of what was for her friend. “We’ve gone over this a dozen times, Spike. I know you don’t want to see her go, but-” “It’s not fair!” Spike interjected.

The argument had always come back to the baby dragon’s same belief. ‘He’s never had to really say goodbye to anypony before, how in Equestria am I supposed to explain this to him?’ Twilight thought to herself, a solemn expression on her face, looking down at the distraught dragon. It was Spike’s turn to sigh. “I know you’re right Twi. I just hate to see her go without telling her... You know. “

Twilight thought it over for a second. “You know what, Spike?” The baby dragon pulled his gaze from the floor up to Twilight’s eyes, which were still looking down to his. “You’re right.” Twilight finished. “I am?” Spike had a quizzical expression stuck to his face. Twilight let a little smile creep up on her face at the sight of Spike’s sudden perking up. “Come on, Spike. We’re going to make a little trip.” The expression on Spike’s face remained unchanged. “Where are we going?” He asked. Twilight let out a little chuckle. “You’ll see.”

As Twilight and Spike walked through Ponyville, Spike realized their destination just as soon as it came into view. “Oh no. No no no no no. I’m not ready for this, Twi! Not yet, at least. I still need to-” A hoof covered Spike’s mouth. Twilight removed her hoof after the muffled sounds from the baby dragon ceased. “She’s only going to be in Ponyville for a few more days, Spike. If you don’t tell her now, I doubt you’ll ever get the chance.”

Spike let out another long sigh. He seemed to be doing a lot of that as of late. He couldn’t help it; Seeing a friend leave is hard, especially one you feel so close to. Spike spent most of his time the past couple of days just sitting in his bed, feeling sorry for himself. Twilight had tried to be as understanding as possible for the past few days for him. She took over Spike’s usual chores, occasionally checking in with him to see how he was doing, but it always led into an argument.

He knew he was being selfish. Of course he wanted what was best for any of his friends, and he knew this was bound to happen at some point, but he always thought he would have more time. He didn’t want Rarity to move to Canterlot, but he also knew she couldn’t give up such a fantastic career opportunity. Her boutique, which was quickly drawing ever nearer, had become in high demand as of late, as fashion designers all over Equestria insisted they design for them.

They were now at the front steps of Carousel Boutique. Twilight motioned for Spike to knock on the door. With one last heavy sigh, Spike knocked on the door. Time seemed to stand still at that point, giving Spike time to think. ‘What will I say? Should I open with a joke? Ooooh, I just don’t think I can do this.’ Spike looked over at Twilight, with that caring smile Twilight only ever gave him. It always seemed to calm him. ‘Maybe I can do this after all.’ The thought had really calmed Spike.

“Coooommiiiing!” The sudden sing-song voice coming from the other side of the door shook Spike back into reality. ‘Nevermind!’ Twilight could see the panic spread across the baby dragon’s face, his eyes shifting everywhere, perhaps looking for somewhere to hide. The door suddenly flew open, revelaing Rarity standing on the other side. “Why Twilight, Spike. How nice to see-” “Aaaaaah!” Spike yelled, before turning on his heels, attempting to flee the situation before he embarassed himself further.

He found however, that his feet weren’t taking him anywhere. In fact, he wasn’t actually moving anywhere. In fact, he wasn’t even touching the ground. Rather, he was being levitated back towards the door, where he could see the puzzled expression on Rarity’s face at the sudden display of terror from the dragon who always seemed so happy to see her.

“Uh... you. Twilight dear, whatever is the matter with Spike? He isn’t ill, is he?” The fashionista inspected the floating Spike head to toe, looking for any sign of disease or ailment. Twilight released her hold on Spike and he dropped to the ground. “Oh no, he’s fine. He’s just here to, uh, have a word with you.” Rarity’s view shifted to Spike, getting back on his feet and wiping dirt off of himself.

“Is this true, Spike? Is there something you needed to talk about?” Spike looked up into Rarity’s azure eyes as she fluttered them a little, staring intently at him, waiting for him to speak. “I, uh,” Spike looked back to Twilight. She still wore that encouraging face, hoping that he could swallow his fear, if only for a moment. “Yeah, I guess I do.” He let out a little smile for Twilight, which she returning with a beaming grin of her own.

“Well, I’ll let you two talk. I’ll see you back at the library, Spike.” Twilight trotted back towards the library, and Spike’s grin faded back to the worried expression he’d had just a moment earlier. The newfound confidence he had slowly drifted from his mind, replaced by the terror of the incoming conversation. Spike suddenly noticed Rarity staring at him, eyebrow raised, as if waiting for something.

“Would you… like to step inside?” She finally broke the silence after an extensive period of eye contact. ‘Oh, right. The whole reason Twi dragged me here in the first place.’ He was wishing he had never argued with Twilight about this; anything had to be better than how he was feeling now. Rather than respond, he simply dragged his feet through the doorway into Rarity’s workshop. The two sat down by Rarity’s sewing table, and much to Spike’s hopes, Rarity had been the first to start the conversation, as he wasn’t quite sure he would be able to himself.

“Now, whatever is it you needed to-” Rarity stopped herself, seeing that sullen pout Spike was had on his face. “Spike, you know that whatever it is you need to talk about, you can always trust me.” Spike looked into Rarity’s eyes, and again noticed her fluttering eyelashes. ‘Ugh.’ He cursed in his head. As much as he normally enjoyed seeing the object of his desire do that, it wasn’t helping with what he was trying to get out.

Back at the library, Twilight was busying her time organizing books and cleaning them up off the floor from her most recent studying binge, anxiously awaiting Spike’s arrival. She was almost giddy with curiosity, knowing that upon his return, Spike would proudly boast of how brave he was in finally confessing his feelings. However, Twilight had never really asked Rarity about how she thought of Spike, as there never was any real indication that Rarity had caught on to Spike’s attraction to the mare.

The thought led to worry, as Twilight pictured the tiny dragon sauntering home, head hung low and spirits crushed. She decided she would give the two a few more minutes before going out to find Spike. She hated the idea of her oldest friend in such despair. ‘He’ll be fine. I’m sure of it. Rarity knows how to be... delicate about somepony’s feelings. And there was always the chance that Rarity felt the same way, right?’

As Celestia’s orange sun began to set over the sky, Twilight’s worries started to re-manifest themselves. She decided that she had waited long enough, and set out towards Carousel Boutique to get Spike. She didn’t have to walk far though, before long she saw Spike heading towards the library. ‘He doesn’t seem like he is in much of a hurry, though. And had he been… crying? Oh Celestia no.’ Twilight ran towards Spike, stopping only inches away from his face. Spike paid no attention to this though, and continued on his path toward the library.

They both remained silent the entire walk home. It wasn’t until they had re-entered the library that Spike let out a long exhale, and turned to Twilight, his little green eyes gleaming in the light. “Twi, can we talk?” His voice was barely audible, but Twilight heard it nonetheless. The words made her heart drop. This couldn’t possibly be good news.

They both sat down, and Spike was quick to start. “So after you left, Rarity and I sat down to talk.” Twilight listened intently, the concern on her face very apparent. “And-” Twilight’s heart raced; she was waiting to hear what awful thing had happened, expecting a horrible tragedy to have befallen the baby dragon. “I just couldn’t tell her.” Twilight’s head thumped onto the desk, followed by a loud groan.

“Really Spike? You had me all worked up, thinking you just had your heart broken, only to find out you chickened out, again?” The hurt on Spike’s face made it clear to Twilight she had clearly overstepped a boundary, and immediately tried to apologize before he got the wrong idea, but Spike simply waved a hoof at it. She figured that meant he knew she hadn’t meant what had come out.

“Twi, I’m sorry. I know you just wanted to help, but…” Twilight was able to figure the rest out, and walked over the baby dragon and held him tightly in a hug. Before long, Spike had pushed away from the hug. “But-” He interrupted the hug to get the necessary to speak, “I couldn’t put that on Rarity right now. She’s so stressed out with the move to Canterlot, the last thing she needs right now is me complicating things for her.” Spike’s head hung low once more that day, as he slowly ascended the stairs, practically hearing his bed calling for him to come to its warm embrace.

“I think I’m just gonna turn in early, alright Twilight?” Spike continued to climb the stairs a few steps, before stopping and turning back towards Twilight. “Unless you need me for something, I mean.” Twilight couldn’t help but smile at that. ‘Oh Spike, always so eager to help.’ “That’s quite alright; you just get your rest. You’ve had a long day.” Twilight flashed Spike a quick smile before returning to cleaning up around the library. Spike let another grin slid into place.

‘Thanks, Twi’, Spike thought as he snuggled himself tightly into his bed. ‘Even if things do go wrong sometimes, I’ve always had Twilight to look out for me. No matter what, I’ll always have her.’ The last thought Spike had before drifting off to sleep was the memory of him and Twilight back in Canterlot, spending their days running around the library, just the two of them. The way it used to be. The grin on his face grew larger as he snoozed.

“Rarity, I don’t really know quite how to say this, so I’m just going to come out with it. I-” He found himself interrupted when he noticed Rarity was no longer seated, but instead was running around her shop, frantically fitting dresses and fabrics into suitcases, with befuddling expressions with each article of clothing, knowing she could only fit so much into her suitcases. “Did you… need a hand, Rarity?”

It seemed Rarity had completely forgotten Spike was even there. “Oh that would be wonderful darling, if you wouldn’t mind fetching me my Spring wardrobe from upstairs?” Spike gave a quick salute before sprinting upstairs. Returning shortly downstairs, carrying several large suitcases, struggling to breath while balancing the heavy payload. “Is this really… all your… clothes?” He managed to squeak out between breaths. “Oh heavens no! This is only what I can bring with me for the time being. I plan on having my entire shop inventory transferred to my new home in Canterlot!” The fashionista finished with a large grin on her face at the mere mention of the name of the regal city.

‘Alright Spike, here’s your chance. It’s now or never’, he had said that to himself a handful of times since his arrival, but he felt it was really going to happen this time. “I’m really happy for you Rarity, I know how much this means to you. After all, you’ve been talking about being a famous Canterlot designer for so long now…” Spike paused for a moment, noticing Rarity seemed to have stopped her frantic packing to listen to him. “And… I’m gonna miss you.”

Rarity’s moved expression was enough for him. ‘Even if she doesn’t know how I feel, at least she knows how much I care.’ She trotted over to him and wrapped him in a tight hug. “I’m going to miss you too, Spike.” The two looked into each other’s eyes for a moment, before parting the hug. After a moment, Rarity broke the silence. “Is… Is that what you came to talk to me about?” Spike only nodded. Rarity’s smile was heartwarming to Spike. “Don’t you worry darling, I’ll come visit, and don’t you go thinking I won’t.”

Another quick hug, and Spike had left for the evening. Even if he hadn’t done what he originally intended during his visit, he still felt somewhat accomplished in what he did. But that thought quickly evaporated into the thought that she was still leaving, and he was still just Rarity’s ‘friend’. He wanted more. “One day.” Spike said to nopony in particular. “One day I’ll tell her.”

Chapter Two

Chapter Two

’5 years. That’s a long time, isn’t it?’ Spike pondered to himself, spending that day lazily staring out the windows of the library. He had been spending a lot of time doing that lately. Everything around him changed so quickly, when could be barely be considered a different dragon than he was today. “Dragon growth takes time Spike, you should enjoy who you are now.” Twilight’s words would often echo through his mind at times like this. He knew why she really sad that though. Even Spike could tell Twilight was scared of the future. Not scared for herself, but rather, worried about Spike.

Twilight knew Spike better than anypony anywhere.  After all, she had been there since his birth. In that time, they certainly had a bond greater than the one shared with her other friends. Of course they were all important to her, but Spike knew the unicorn had a special place in her heart for her little assistant. “Little assistant. She won’t be able to say that one day.”

That thought had always been one of both excitement and fear to him. On one hand, he would often find himself dreaming of himself as a full grown dragon, soaring through the skies of Equestria, seeing the many wonders of the world. On the other hand, he would be doing so long after Twilight- He shook the thought away. No sense in bringing down his mood. He was, after all, waiting on a very important letter in the mail.

Twilight Sparkle opened the library door; Spike was nearly ready to tackle the violet maned mare in excitement. “Did they have it?” Spike couldn’t contain his excitement. He had been waiting anxiously for Twilight to return from the post office. Not everypony could have a dragon sending letters for them, you know.  Spike’s expression however, faded, as Twilight’s head dropped at the baby dragon’s enthusiasm. She didn’t want to have to break the news to him again. The look on her face however, drew the little dragon to the right conclusion.

“Oh.” Spike slunk back to the chair by the window he recently vacated, and continued watching the clouds roll by. Or rather, watch the weather patrol push the clouds by. Twilight however, seemed to have other plans and walked over to Spike, sitting down on her haunches to look at him from eye level. “I’m sorry Spike, I’m sure-” But Spike waved a hand at the whole thing. “I know Twi; we’ve been going over this same scene every day for months. I-” Spike choked a little on the words before he could finally bring himself to spit them out. “I don’t care anymore.”

Those words dealt a crushing blow to Twilight. She had never seen the Spike act this way before. She hated to be mad at one of her friends, but Rarity hadn’t visited or written to any of her friends since she left for Canterlot. That had been over 5 years ago. She really did worry about the fashionista at times, though. They had only ever visited her in Canterlot once a few years ago, and that didn’t go as well as planned.

“Honestly darlings, it’s so good to see you! We really must do some catching up!” Rarity hadn’t changed at all since she’d left. Although, it was only a little over 3 years ago. ‘How much could things have possibly changed about her since she left?’ Twilight wondered, as she, along with Spike, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, and Pinkie Pie were being lead through a tour of Rarity’s new home/ studio in Canterlot.

Applejack, unfortunately, had to stay behind on this trip. As much as she had wanted to see her friend after so long apart, things had just become too busy down at the farm as of late. ‘Maybe soon ah’ll be rich ‘nuff to afford a place’n Canterlot muhself’, Applejack joked to herself, waving a farewell to her friends before they left for Canterlot and went back to helping Applebloom build the extension on the new house. She had been so proud the day Applebloom finally noticed her talent in construction. By the looks of it, Applebloom had been mighty proud of it herself, taking every opportunity to use a hammer or saw. It was amazing to him what had happened to the rest of the Cutie Mark Crusaders too.

Sweetie Belle was embracing her singing voice, but was having a bit of trouble finding a use for it for the time being. So she spend most of her time skipping through Ponyville, singing to nopony in particular. Not that anypony minded, her voice was really something. As for Scootaloo, she was still determined to be like her hero, Rainbow Dash. She had set off for Flight School a few years ago, and only returned a few months ago as a proud graduate.

Back in Canterlot however, five ponies, along with an overwhelmingly thrilled dragon, were swapping stories of recent years. Rarity told everypony in excruciating detail about each and every fashion show she put on, and all the sophisticated soirées she attended. Spike listened intently through each story, not to anypony’s surprise. Later, they dined in the most ‘exquisite’, as Rarity had put it, restaurant in all of Canterlot.

As Luna’s moon began to rise into the sky, the friends had intended to give Rarity their goodbyes, that is until she had insisted they all stay the night, and in the morning they could attend her unveiling of her latest ‘masterpieces’; She spoke the word with the utmost flair and regality as she could. But late that evening, long after everypony had gone to bed for the night, one pony lied awake, unable to sleep, with questions constantly bubbling at the forefront of her brain.

The door to Rarity’s room slowly slid open, as a figure made its way over the sleeping form of Rarity, deep in a trance under her one-of-a-kind hand stitched sheets. “Rarity, wake up.” A few groans and mumbles later, Rarity slid the eye cover off her face, and searched around the room for who had awoken her from her much needed beauty rest. “Twilight? Whatever are you doing? Do you have any idea what time it is?”

“I’m sorry to bother you right now, Rarity. I know how important your rest is to you.” Twilight tried her best to keep Rarity calm, as Twilight could see even in the low light the expression of disdain Rarity wore from having been woken at Celestia knows what time. “It’s just that, well...” Twilight was having difficulty spitting out her question. “Darling, if you have something to say, then please say it. I cannot be held up all night waiting. I am a busy pony, after all.” Rarity’s words rang bitter in Twilight’s ears. She chalked it up to the sleep deprivation, rather than the belief that her dear friend had become so… contemptible.

‘C’mon brain! Now isn’t the time to freeze up!’ Twilight shook her head in an attempt to clear her thoughts. When her eyes settled, there were still fixed upon the eyes of a very perturbed pony. “Why didn’t you ever visit, you know, like you said you would?” Rarity was taken aback by this. Twilight’s expression was filled with worry, and hurt that her friend had seemingly turned her back on all her old other friends.

Rarity’s face was now mirroring Twilight’s own, and she let out a sigh. “When I had made that promise, I had seriously underestimated the amount of time and effort I would be putting in around here. It’s not that I never wanted to visit you girls, but the life of a celebrity is filled with glamour and expectations. I can’t simply drop everything to see my friends.” She could see the hurt on Twilight’s face as she finished her sentence.

After a long pause, during which neither pony dared look at one another, Twilight broke the silence. “But Rarity, you set this whole day together with us up with only a few weeks notice. How could it be that after 3 years you could never have visited us even once? Or just sent a simple letter for that matter? We all worry about you, you know. That was what this whole trip up here was really about. We thought you had forgotten about us.”

Rarity’s eyes never left the floor while she spoke. “Twilight, while I have always cherished my friendship with you girls…” Rarity chanced up a short glance into Twilight’s eyes, before peering back down towards her bed, “I thought it would be better to move on. Cut the ties, as it were.” Rarity looked up again, only to be met with a look of disgust and sorrow. “Rarity,” Twilight’s voice was hoarse; she sounded like she was on the verge of breaking down. “Do you really mean that?”

Rarity cleared her throat before continuing. “Please understand, darling, I mean this in the nicest of ways. It’s just too difficult to keep such long distance relationships working, and only seeing one another through ink…” It was Rarity’s turn to have an inner struggle with her words, “It would just be hard on everypony. I know it’s hard to lose a friend Twilight, but please understand.”

Twilight couldn’t process what she was hearing. Somewhere along the line, Rarity had forgotten how important her friends were to her, and vice versa. She turned to head towards the door and walk away. “Wait!” Twilight turned to see Rarity trotting up to her, embracing her in a hug, but Twilight pushed her away, anger still burning hot in her eyes. “And what about Spike? He really missed you, he’s been sending letters constantly since you left, have you not been getting them?”

Rarity looked away, ashamed to look at her formerly close friend. “I… I got every one. It’s not that I wan’t to break the little darling’s heart, believe me Twilight.” The statement did little to quell the rage Twilight had building up. “It’s just… We’re too different from one another. He and I-” Twilight’s glare was beginning to get to her. “It never would work out, Twilight. Spike belongs in Ponyville with you, and you know that. I had to follow my dream, and you would never let yourself be separated from him, would you?”

Twilight didn’t respond. ‘She has a point, you know.’ Her own thoughts betrayed her feelings. Instead, she walked out of the room, leaving Rarity alone in her bedroom again. Twilight didn’t go back to bed, either. She spent the remainder of the night and early into the morning sitting outside, letting a few precious tears roll down her face, plummeting down into the dirt below. “I’m so, so sorry, Spike.” She was speaking to herself.

Twilight sat next to Spike, the two locked into a caring embrace. Eventually, the two broke apart, and Spike spoke. “Twi, why do you think she does it?” Twilight hated that question. She never had an answer for it, and always relied on changing the subject or perhaps an unexpected interruption from her friends to tear them away from the topic. This time though, no such thing came.

“Spike, you know how busy she gets. She’s the most famous designer in all of Canterlot. She doesn’t have the time anymore.” Spike’s frown deepened, giving a slight nod to Twilight to let her know he understood. “But,” Spike stalled for a moment to collect his thoughts for what he was about to say. “She still cares, right Twi?” That moment lasted for some time in the unicorn’s mind. ‘Can I really tell him the truth? He’s so sad already, and he’s been sending those letters for two years since our visit. How can I tell him now that there is no chance she’ll write him back?’ Twilight pulled Spike into another hug, and whispered into his ear, “Of course she cares about you Spike.”

Rarity entered her illustrious home after a long day listening to a bunch of stuffy Canterlot ponies chewed her ear off on designs. It was moments like this she missed in Ponyville. She collapsed on her couch and stared into space for a few minutes, before noticing a picture sitting on here coffee table. It was of her and the other Elements of Harmony, and Spike of course, all smiling into the camera. She really did miss them, but ‘things were better this way, Right?’

She seemed to be asking herself that a lot lately. She got up and trotted over to her wardrobe, and slid the large wooden door open, revealing the massive cornucopia of different coloured and styled dresses she had created over the years. From deep within the back of the substantial wardrobe, she pulled out a large chest, which was covered in dust from not being moved in years. Rarity opened the chest, and levitated its contents out along the floor.

They were all the dresses she had made for the Grand Galloping Gala years ago. Each were kept perfectly preserved through the years, to remind her always of how much her friends had meant to her. ‘You know, maybe the Gala hadn’t be that bad after all.’ Rarity felt a little smile creep onto her face.

Chapter Three

Chapter Three

“Ha-ha! You’re gonna have to try harder if you’re going to keep up with me, Rainbow Dash!” Spike shouted behind him as he soared through the sky over Ponyville, carried by an impressive set of powerful dragon wings. He tilted his wings to slow himself down, and descended onto the edge of a cliff. Shortly after, Rainbow Dash landed next to him.

“You’re lucky you’re still young, Spike. Back in the day, when I was in my prime, I would have had you beat, easy.” The rainbow maned mare gloated over her more youthful days. “Are you kidding me?” Spike let out a little chuckle. “Rainbow Dash, Captain of The Wonderbolts, thinks she’s getting old? Dash, you’re the fastest pony in all of Equestria, and everypony knows it. You are in your prime.”

Dash couldn’t help but let out a little blush at the compliment. Ever since Spike had a set of fully grown wings, the two had become very close friends, especially since Dash finally had someone to really challenge her to be better again. She never would have thought that 20 years ago, when Spike and Twilight had first come to Ponyville, that she had met her future rival of the skies.

“I’m just faster, is all.” Spike’s haughty comment wiped the smile off Dash’s face and replaced it with a bitter frown, as well as tearing her away from her thoughts. “Now don’t like at me like that, Dash. You know there isn’t any beating dragon wings.” Spike looked behind himself at the purple wings protruding from his sides; Spike himself was no bigger than the average pony at his age, but his wings were definitely something to be proud of. He wondered how he ever used to get by moving around on the ground.

‘Oh right; Twilight.’ Spike remembered Twilight would always let him relax on the mare’s backside wherever he needed to go. He really missed those days, sometimes. “Well, that was a really great flying session, Spike. Same time tomorrow?” Dash had returned to her usual playful nature. “You know it! See you around, Rainbow!” With that, the two parted ways. Spike had a few more stops to make today, just like he did every day.

“Heya AJ! How’s it going?” Spike hovered over the orange pony, working hard bucking apples, as always. Sweet Apple Acres had to be one of the only buildings in Ponyville that hadn’t changed over the years. Applejack looked up at Spike, “Nah git down here, ‘fore I sprain mah neck lookin’ up at’cha.” Spike slowly descended to the ground, and smiled at the earth pony. “AJ, why do you keep doing this? You know I can just knock down all the apples with a beat of my wings. Why won’t you ever just let me help?”

Applejack really got tired of having this argument. ‘Nah calm down, Applejack. Spike jus’ cares ‘bout you, s’all.’ Applejack gave Spike a cheeky grin. “n’ what exactly would I do every day, then?” Spike’s laughed slipped out at his friends attempt at humor. “You’re going to hurt yourself one of these days, AJ. And then you’ll say-” Spike cleared his throat to shift his voice to mimic Applejack’s. “Oh whatever will ah do! I’ve done gone n’ hurt muhself! If only ah had listened tah Spike!”

Applejack didn’t look amused at that. “Nah I do not sound like that.” Applejack had to laugh at it though, it wasn’t a half bad impression. “Relax AJ, you know I just worry.” The two shared a kind smile. “Ah now that Spike, but ah can’t just sit on mah flank every single day.” Spike could see the hurt in Applejack’s eyes. Granny Smith had spent her last years in that chair; Applejack didn’t want to end up missing out on her last years because she wanted to ‘take it easy.’

Applejack made a loud exhale to let her next words known. “I suppose-” Spike perked up immediately. He was sure he knew what she was going to say. “You could help me. But just this once!” Spike shot up into the air over the orchard, a huge grin plastered on his face. ‘Alright, he thought. Let’s see if this works.’ He began flapping his wings in long, powerful stroke, whipping up the wind through the branches of the apple trees.

With the powerful gust causing the fruit bearing trees to flail their branches wildly, apples starting falling one by one to the ground. Once he was satisfied with his work, believing he had gotten just about every tree he could see, Spike flew back down towards Applejack. “See? Now all you have to do is put them in the basket. Isn’t that nice?” Spike spoke in the most sincere tone he could muster. Applejack, on the other hand, heard it as condescension.

“We ain’t gonna have this argument again, Spike.” She trotted off to go collect the apples around the orchard, leaving Spike to make his next stop for the day. ‘Nah you know that ain’t true, Applejack.’ She knew she was right too. The two of them had the same conversation every day, after all.

Spike saw his next destination closing in. It was hard not to notice, with all the animals running about. How Fluttershy could manage to take care of so many animals was beyond Spike’s comprehension. He lowered himself to the ground and walked the short distance remaining to Fluttershy’s cottage. It only took him one time to learn how easily a tiny bunny can get whisked away by a breeze because of Spike’s flapping.

Spike knocked on the door, and just as he did every day, heard a tiny “eeek!” come from the other side. And, almost like clockwork, a few seconds later the door opened to reveal the timid Pegasus, cautiously peering through the crack in the door to make sure it wasn’t a snarling monster on the other side. “Oh, hello Spike. It’s so nice to see you. Please, come in.” Spike stepped inside, and looked around at the animals running around the pegasus’ home. It seemed like there were more of them with each day.

“So, what brings you here, Spike?” It was so nice being able to have real conversations with Fluttershy over the years. She had overcome her cowardice quite a lot. But, she never could control herself after sudden noises. “Fluttershy, I come here every day; and you know why.” Spike grinned at the shy pegasus giggling at her forgetfulness. “Um... right. Did I ever tell you how nice it is that you do this for all of us?” Spike never got tired of hearing that. “Every day. So, need any help around here?”

Fluttershy never did accept Spike’s help, and he didn’t expect it to be any different this time. “Oh no, that is quite alright Spike.” He knew why she didn’t want the help; she was afraid Spike would scare all of her animal friends again. Spike always tried to assure her that is was a one-time thing, but she just wouldn’t take that chance.

So the pair talked. And talked. And Talked. ‘Fluttershy was getting almost as chatty as-’ Spike stopped his thought. He just couldn’t bring himself to say that name. “Well, Fluttershy, I think it’s about time I get going. See you tomorrow?” Spike headed out the door and flew off, hearing a little voice say “Oh, um, bye!” coming from behind him. On his way back to the library, he saw a familiar sight; a florist. Spike landed to get a good look at the building.

It was heart wrenching for Spike to think about what used to stand there. But the Cakes had gone out of business, and had to sell Sugarcube Corner. That was the last any of his friends had ever seen of Pinkie Pie either. She never told them where she was going, for some reason. He really did miss Pinkie’s parties; they livened up Ponyville so much more. Without them, the whole town was so much more peaceful and quiet. Spike hated it. It was too different to what he had always known, after all.

What he really hated about it though, was the reason it was quiet. It was all because another friend of his had left, only this time it was without even so much as a goodbye. ‘Maybe she just couldn’t bear to say goodbye to everypony?’ The thought did little ease Spike’s conscience. He and Rainbow Dash spent weeks looking for Pinkie Pie, but never found anything. It was if she was just completely vanished in the blink of an eye.

Spike turned and headed towards the library again. He walked the rest of the way though; suddenly he wasn’t the mood for flying. As he approached the front door of the library, he let out a heavy sigh before opening the door. “Hey Twi, I’m back!” No answer. There never was. ‘Twilight isn’t here. She’s never going to come back. You know that Spike. Why do you keep doing this to yourself?’ He never was able to answer his own question.

“Come on, Twi! Don’t go!” Spike pleaded for his best friend. He didn’t want to see her leave. He was tired of ponies leaving. “Spike-” Twilight used that stern tone on Spike when trying to lecture him for as long as he could remember. “I’m sorry if you feel hurt, but I’m going, and that is final.” Spike stood still for a moment, just staring into Twilight’s big round eyes. “You’re… welcome to come with me Spike. You know that.” Spike slowly shook his head.

“Twi, you know I can’t do that. You know I have to spend most of my life without my friends. I need to make the best of my time with them.” Spike could figure out himself what Twilight would say next. “What about me, Spike?” ‘Saw that one coming.’ Spike shook the thought out. “It wouldn’t take me more than an hour to fly to Canterlot, Twi. I can still see you any time.” Spike realized the conversational trap he’d just walked into. Twilight now wore the same pleading face Spike had on just only moments ago. “Then why does it matter if I go, Spike? It’s not like we’re saying goodbye forever.”

Twilight was technically right, “But I don’t want things to change, Twi!” For the first time in years, Spike saw Twilight make a face of immense grief. She felt sorry for Spike. He knew she didn’t want to hurt him. ‘I’m sorry, Twi.’ Spike had planned on saying that, but that words never found their way out. After a brief silence, Twilight spoke again. “Sometimes things have to change, Spike. You can’t hold on to what you have forever. We all have to move on.”

That wasn’t what Spike wanted to hear, but he couldn’t find the strength to argue any longer about it. He gave Twilight one last pleading look before Twilight left the library, leaving Spike alone in a deafening silence. ‘Things will be different this time. I’m going to make sure of it.’ He stepped outside the library, where several ponies gave him looks of shock. Everypony around had heard his argument with Twilight, but he paid them no mind. Instead, Spike took flight. He didn’t care where he was going; he just needed to get away.

The library barely got used by ponies, so Spike would often have a lot of time to himself. He preferred it when he had Twilight there to talk to. But, she was in Canterlot now, being taught under the Princesses. It had been years since they had last sent a friendship report, so Celestia believed Twilight had finished her research on the subject, and asked if she would like to learn directly under herself and Princess Luna.

Spike remembered the day she got that letter; she was so excited she was leaping all around the library. At the time, Spike was happy for Twilight. She got what made her happy, and that made him happy. Then it sunk in what it really meant. Of course, he wanted to go with Twilight, but the other Elements of Harmony had become very important to him too. So, he stayed. He would visit Twilight every few weeks, and she always seemed very excited to see him.

Spike settled down into his bed, or rather, Twilight’s old bed, as he had long ago outgrew his old one. Her scent still haunted the sheets. ‘Or maybe I’m just going crazy.’ Spike thought. Regardless, it meant one part of Twilight that had never left. Before Spike slipped into a deep sleep, one more thought escaped his mind; ‘Even if I don’t see you all the time anymore Twi, at least you’re still here.’ Spike adjusted himself to wriggle deeper into the sheets. ‘For now, I still have you.’

Chapter Four

Chapter Four

Every day. Every day for the past 30 years, Twilight and Spike written back and forth to each other. It was becoming increasingly difficult however for Spike to use a quill. His claws were simply getting too big. ’50 years since Twi and I came to Ponyville. Wow, did that time go by fast.’ Spike wondered to himself, sitting inside the newly expanded library.

The residence of Ponyville had all helped to rebuild the library from the ground up, after a sneezing accident while Spike slept had caused the whole library to burn down. Recalling the event, Spike thought aloud to himself. “I suppose it was a happy accident. After all, I could barely fit through the door anymore.” Spike chuckled at the thought. He was larger than either of the Princesses now. He was becoming a big, snarly, teeth gnashing dragon.

Nopony saw him like that though. Over the years, Ponyville’s resident dragon had become very well known. Spike would stroll down the streets and ponies would always wave to him; little fillies would often try climbing onto his backside, much to their parents’ detest. Sometimes Spike wished he could act like a big, scary, mean dragon. He would at least make fewer friends that way. ‘Less friends to lose.’

Spike seldom had cheery thoughts on friendship nowadays. He had already seen enough friends pass away. The hardest of which, probably being the first, as the concept was new to him, and he never real was able to move on during the sad moments of his life. Spike never got over the feeling of abandonment from Rarity, but he still had his other friends to at least try to cheer him up. But that all started to change.

“I can’t believe she’s really gone.” Twilight had her head hung low, leaning on Spike for support. It was nice having Twilight back in Ponyville, even if it was for such a solemn occasion. All of Spike’s friends were there; Rainbow Dash had recently resigned as the Captain of The Wonderbolts. She was just getting too old for it now. So she spent most of her time relaxing, enjoying her ‘retirement’.

Pinkie Pie was crying deeply into Dash’s shoulder. Spike could tell why. It was hard to have only just come back to town, only to have your friend pass away days later. Pinkie had apparently been traveling across Equestria the past few years. Spike remembered her saying something about life being too short, so she wanted to see everything Equestria had to offer. ‘Pinkie never was one to stay in one place for too long’, Spike thought. ‘Though, she usually just hops around. Not hop countries.’

Having left without a goodbye, everypony was baffled as to why she would leave without so much as a goodbye. Pinkie had said “What’s the point in a goodbye if I’m coming back?” Just like that, it was as if Pinkie never left; asides from the plethora of stories she had, that is. Spike looked over to Fluttershy, who was tending to some baby bunnies, no doubt to try and take her mind away from the scene mere metres away. A tombstone is never something that you like to remind you of your friend.

They had all come to pay their respects to Applejack. Spike had really hated how she had passed. Even into her old age she insisted on continuing to work the farm, despite her friends’ constant worried complaints. That was what did her in. Just up and collapsed in the middle of bucking a stubborn tree, not to be discovered for hours until Applebloom arrived at the library door, streaming with tears.

‘You stubborn filly,’ Spike felt a pain in his chest remembering all the times he had told Applejack to learn to relax. ‘You couldn’t have just listened to me, could you!’ Spike yelled inside his own mind, staring down at the grave. The dragon scanned the surrounding area and counted the names of each pony as he saw them. ‘Pinkie, Dash, Twi, Fluttershy…’ Spike’s spirits dropped even lower. ‘Still no Rarity.’

Twilight walked with Spike back to the library, the two exchanging not a single word the entire trip. Upon entering the library, Spike immediately dropped to the floor, unable to keep going under the mental strain. “Spike, I know you feel responsible for this, but it’s not your fault.”

‘Twilight always could tell how I felt. I’d be glad she’s here if I weren’t so depressed.’ Spike let the silent compliment go unsaid. “I know, Twi. It’s just that-” He couldn’t finish the sentence. A lump in his throat just wouldn’t let the painful words out. That is, until Twilight walked over d nuzzled against him, her eyes twinkling as they looked up to him. “Why didn’t she show up?” Spike rolled onto his side, away from Twilight. He didn’t want to see her expression.

“Maybe… She didn’t find out? I’m sure if we went to Canterlot right now she-” Spike interrupted, while pulling himself back onto his feet. “No Twi, she doesn’t care. That, I’m sure of.” There was a long silence, until Twilight made a shift in tone Spike wasn’t expecting. “You’ve got to be kidding me Spike! After all these years, you still haven’t gotten past this?” Twilight’s face was filled with rage, and even to Spike’s massive form she looked intimidating.

“What do you want me to do Twilight! I can’t just forget!” Spike really didn’t want to argue with Twilight, especially knowing in Twi’s old age, he didn’t have much time left with her, and really wanted to make the best of it. But something inside him fueled his rage, pushing him to continue the argument. “What I want, Spike, is for you to forgive! If you keep spending all your time wishing things could stay the same, you’ll never get over these things!”

‘Why does she always have to be right?’ Spike knew he couldn’t win this argument, but his mouth betrayed him. “Get out. Now.” Spike turned away from Twilight, and waited to hear the library door slam shut before turning back again. Exhausted, Spike slumped back onto the ground. He wished at that moment that he could just cry, but his anger refused to subside. ‘I really hope this isn’t a dragon thing. I don’t want to be angry anymore.’

Spike had later patched things up with Twilight, at least to the extent where she wasn’t mad at him. Spike continued to resent Rarity for leaving, though. ‘You’re not mad because she’s gone, you’re mad because you never told her how you felt.’ That wasn’t Spike’s voice inside his head, but Twilight’s. Her presence really was everywhere for Spike, her words of advice always coming to mind when he needed them. Once again, Twilight was right. Spike flew out from the library, and off into the distance, where the outline of Canterlot could be seen. ‘I’m coming, Rarity. I’m coming to put these stupid feelings to rest.’

The flight gave Spike plenty of time to think about what he was going to say. He went over the situation in his head over and over. No detail or scenario was left unprepared for. Once Rarity’s boutique was in sight, Spike let out a burst of speed towards it. He felt fueled by the adrenaline of confronting the mare; he wanted to get this done as soon as he could.

Touching down just outside the front door with a loud thud, Spike made his way towards the shop, an angry scowl arched across his face. Three hard knocks on the door were met with no response from inside. This only served to further infuriate the dragon. Spike made another loud pounding on the door, wherein it came unbolted from its hinges and came thundering down with a loud crash.

“Oops.” Spike looked around to see if anypony saw what he just did. He was thrown a few looks of disgust, fear, and confusion, but being a menacing dragon- or at least to those unfamiliar with him, no pony said anything and continued about their business. Spike groaned. The doorway was too small for him to fit in. He was however, able to crane his head inside, and looked around the shop.

There was nothing there. The place was completely barren. ‘What in Equestria happened here?’ Spike entertained the thought that Rarity simply moved to some place bigger, more expensive, and farther away from everypony else. ‘Hmm. Maybe Twilight knows.’ So Spike set off towards the Royal Canterlot Library. If Twilight was anywhere, it was there.

Spike was certainly grateful that the library had that large, glass window on one side; it certainly made things easier, since he couldn’t fit into the library either. Again though, Spike could not find the pony he was looking for. ‘Twilight not in a library? Things really have changed.’ Without any other ideas left, Spike spread his wings and took off back towards Ponyville.

He stopped, however, when he heard a voice call out from behind him. It was Princess Celestia, riding on her carriage, which was now fast approaching him. “Spike, it was been quite some time since we have seen each other. How have you been?” Spike had long ago abandoned traditional mannerisms in front royalty, and the Princesses seemed to as well.

“I’m doing-” Spike thought about it for a second. ‘Maybe the Princess knows where Twilight is?’ “Say, Cele,” Spike had, like many others over the years, adopted the pet name for the Princess. “Do you know where I could find Twilight? I’m kind of in a hurry right now.” The Sun Princess took a pause, trying to remember where she last saw Twilight. “Last I saw her, I believe she was helping Luna with her… speaking problem.”

Twilight had spent a fair share of her time since she moved to Canterlot teaching Princess Luna to speak more ‘modern’. It was funny, if not just a little sad, that after more than 30 years in Canterlot, Twilight was still trying to teach that pony to speak normally; and at a reasonable volume for that matter. “Thanks Princess! See you around!” Spike took off without waiting for a goodbye from the Sun Goddess.

Spike was eternally thankful he could still fit into the palace. It was the one place he didn’t feel so giant. Spike wandered the halls, until he heard a distinct, familiar voice. It was Twilight! Spike turned a corner towards the voice, and sure enough, there was Twilight walking side by side with Luna. Spike flew overhead of the two, the loud ‘woosh’ very evident to the two ponies. ‘Thank Celestia for these high ceilings!’ Spike thought, a huge grin on his face.

Both Twilight and Luna stood there, looking up at the dragon looming over them. A grin became stuck to Twilight’s face. “Surprise! Thought I’d drop in and see my favourite pony. And uh, hi Princess.”  Spike couldn’t help but beam looking at Twilight. Even in her old age, with a faded mane, wrinkled face and tired expression, Twilight still looked as full of life as she always had, at least in Spike’s eyes.

“Hello, Spike. So nice to see you.” Princess Luna said, looking over to Twilight, who in returned gave her a reassuring nod of the head at the proper sentence. “So Spike, what are you doing here?” Suddenly Spike remembered the whole reason he was had been trying to find Twilight in the first place. “Oh yeah! Twi, can I talk to you?” Spike looked over to Luna, who was grinning ear to ear at Spike, “Alone, please.”

Luna’s surprised expression told Spike she got the message. “Ah, say no more. I shall be off. Fare thee well, Twilight Sparkle.”  With that, Luna trotted off down the hall, leaving Twilight and Spike alone in the castle corridor. ‘Wow,’ Spike thought, ‘she really still talks like that.’ Shaking the thought away, Spike looked over to Twilight, who was still holding a weak smile looking at him.

“Twi, do you know where Rarity is? I need to talk to her.” Time seemed to stop at that moment for Spike, as Twilight’s happy expression faded into a deeply disturbed look. Spike was confused. What had he just said? Was Twilight mad at him? “Spike, I thought you knew.” This only confused the dragon further. “What do you mean, Twi? Is something the matter?”

Twilight looked like she was struggling to answer Spike. Her lips were quivering, and she avoided looking at Spike in favouring of staring into the velvet rug that stretched across the hall. “Spike, Rarity is… She’s gone Spike.” Spike couldn’t feel his heartbeat anymore. Everything really felt as though it were at a standstill.

Spike didn’t know what to do, so he went with instinct and flew out the castle doors as quickly as he could. ‘How could I have been so stupid! I had decades to do this, and now it’s too late! Stupid, stupid Spike!’ He tried to force back the tears as he flew, but the tears still managed to push their way passed his eyelids and down his cheek.

Once again, Twilight was right. Spike held onto his anger for too long, and now he paid the price. All that anger was washed away in a single moment, replaced by regret and self-hatred for having ever been so foolish. ‘I should have just listened to you Twi. I could have avoided all of this. But… But none of that matters anymore.’ Spike didn’t pay attention to where he was flying, he just wanted to get far, far away.

And so he did.

Chapter Five

Chapter Five

‘One. Hundred. Years.’ Spike found himself thinking about that a lot. It had been over one hundred years since he and Twilight had first come to Ponyville. He missed Twilight. He missed everypony, really. He had long outlived them all already, and he himself was still only really in his youth. He didn’t get to know anypony else, so the only ponies he could still talk to were the Princesses, but as they were always busy with royal duties, he hardly saw either of them.

Spike missed Ponyville as well. He looked down to it, high atop his mountain cave, a sour expression on his face, as he recalled why he could no longer set foot in the town. It wasn’t his fault; it’s difficult to be careful about where you step when you’re his size. Not to mention he tried to help when he accidently stepped on that pony, not to mention the injuries were only minor. Still, the Ponyville residents didn’t want the dragon around.

Not that he could really blame them, anypony that knew Spike when he was an adorable baby dragon was long gone. Nopony in that town actually knew Spike, and he never wanted to get to know them. ‘Just more friends to lose.’ That thought always crept into his mind whenever he considered trying to talk to somepony. It was what always kept him from making new friends; it was part of why Spike had become so miserable.

He had kept the pain of losing all of his friends to himself, never letting anypony try to comfort him, in fear that he would grow attached. Spike always tried to act kind towards ponies in his seldom interactions with them. He didn’t want to turn into ‘other’ dragons; the ones that gobbled ponies, hoarded gems, and murder those who dare approach his cave. Spike never wanted to give into those primal dragon urges.

He was however, beginning to see what could make a creature act that way. Having to live alone, hiding away from those who fear you, it was certainly enough to make for one very bitter, resentful creature. Spike often felt little thoughts like that sneak up on him; ‘They all hate you, you know. You really should give them a reason to.’ But he always turned those thoughts away. Sometimes that was hard to do, but then he would hear Twilight’s voice, reminding him of who he was.

The voice would come less and less frequently with the years, though. It was hard for Spike to hold onto the memory of her for so many years, as little details about her would slip from his mind. He knew that one day he would barely even remember Twilight, and even though being able to let go of the painful memories he carried was a prospect Spike very much desired, he never wanted to forget every the purple unicorn had done for him.

Today was the worst day of Spike’s life. All he wanted to do at that moment was fly away, and never look back. It was all too much to take in. He couldn’t though, this was too important. Besides, he was so stricken with grief; his wings were clasped to his side, incapable of spreading them. Celestia had made a big event out of all of this, not surprisingly. It was for her personal pupil after all.

It seemed like all of Canterlot had gathered for the occasion. Everypony was gathered in the royal garden, right where Twilight requested it to be. A giant marble statue of the unicorn was on proud display, with an engraving on it.

“Here Lies Twilight Sparkle”

“Ponyville’s Resident Librarian”

“Princess Celestia’s Star Pupil”

“Friend”

Spike was choked up just looking at the statue; he couldn’t bear to look at Twilight’s face right now. Spike suddenly felt something lean against him. It was Fluttershy, looking up at him with puffy, red eyes. She was the only one of his friends left, but Spike could see the effects of age were weighing heavily upon the pegasus. Her eyes bore crow’s feet, face laid with wrinkles, barely able to stand up on her own two hooves anymore.

And yet, she stilled made sure she could be there for Spike on this day. It was at least somewhat comforted knowing he still had somepony left. In the back of his mind though, he feared the inevitable day, and however soon it was, that the gentle pegasus would go. That was a thought for another time, though. Today was about Twilight.

Before long, Princess Celestia arrived, a shaken expression Spike had never seen on the Princess since her reunion with Luna. The Princess gave a long speech about Twilight, from the moment Twilight had first met her as a filly, to the last days the two had together. All throughout her tale, the Sun Goddess regaled ponies in tales of their time through the decades. The Princess finally reached the end of her speech, Spike just about ready to burst from the seams with tears.

“And so, we commend this pony to the afterlife awaiting her, remembering her for all she has done for everypony. We will miss you, Twilight Sparkle.” Spike could’ve sworn he saw Celestia wipe a tear from her eye as she walked away. Everypony began to disperse, until only Spike and Fluttershy remained. “Come on Spike. My carriage is waiting.” Her voice was weak and frail, a barely audible squeak to Spike. “I think I’m gonna stick around, actually. You go ahead.”

In reality, Spike wanted very much to leave the spot, but he couldn’t bring himself to move; he could only stand there with his head hung low, trying to remain his composure, at least until everypony was gone. “Oh… okay. Don’t stay too long, Spike.” Fluttershy really tried to look out for Spike for the past few days. Spike was fairly certain the pegasus was just trying to fill Twilight’s affectionate, motherly role to Spike. It was a futile effort to Spike. ‘There’s nopony like Twilight.’ He thought.

Spike hadn’t left his cave in days, and the hunger was really starting to get to him. At his size, he had to eat a lot, and the only food big enough to be satisfying were… He didn’t like to think about it. He would never eat a pony, he knew that. He had however had a rather guilty experience with a group of buffalo that he never had been able to live down.

It was those feral moments that scared Spike the most; the thought that one day he might completely give in to instinct, and end up ravaging his beloved Ponyville. He could find peace though, in that for the time being he wasn’t a horrible monster. He just wished somepony else could see that. “Spike, you haven’t left since my last visit, have you?” Spike lifted his head, to see Princess Celestia had trotted into his cave while he was lost in thought.

“Hello Princess.” Spike’s words were monotone and joyless. “How’s your star pupil doing?” Spike could see the Princess’ discomfort. Anytime the two discussed Celestia’s new student, both their thoughts would turn to Twilight. “He’s doing quite well, actually. In fact, he has proven to be quite a powerful unicorn.” Spike hated hearing how good that pony was. ‘Nopony could be better than Twilight’ was a thought that was constantly repeated in Spike’s mind during these conversations.

“I know you’re in an awkward position, Spike. We both are. You are a dear friend, but with your growth, you are putting my kingdom in a fair bit of danger.” Spike knew this conversation was going to happen at some point. He had been putting off visiting the Princesses in an attempt to avoid this conversation. “I know.” Spike said in little more than a whisper.

He turned his gaze from the stone floor over to Celestia, who was now walking closer to him. “But what do you want me to do?” Spike already knew the answer that was coming, but he still held onto the hope it wouldn’t have to be that way. Celestia let out a heavy sigh. “Spike, you need to leave Equestria. Like all dragons, it’s not safe for everypony to have you here. I wish there was another way. I’m sorry.”

Those words hurt Spike. Not because the only friend he still had was forcing him away, but because she was right. He would hurt somepony again, he knew it, The Princess knew it, everypony knew it. Rather than saying anything, Spike headed towards the edge of the cave, readying his wings to take flight. Something stopped him, though. A thought that sprouted a question in his mind. Spike turned to face Celestia.

“How do you do it?” Celestia was taken aback by the question, a quizzical expression on her face. So Spike continued his question. “How can you move past losing your subject throughout the years? Especially the ones you know so well.” Spike could see Celestia was deep in thought at the question, recalling memories of ponies past. For a long time, a silence passed between the two, until Celestia finally spoke.

“I don’t.” Spike wasn’t expecting that answer, it was now his turn to hold the confused face. Celestia continued. “I do not stop feeling for those ponies I have lost, for if I did, I would forget them. That would do dishonor to their memory. But with each new friend, one can come to terms with these tragedies. You and I bear the wonderful gift that is such a long life, Spike.” Spike didn’t feel like it was such a gift to him.

“It may feel like a curse at times, Spike. But with your age will come wisdom, and patience. You will have horribly painful moments, that is something I will not lie to you about.” If this speech was meant to cheer Spike up, it clearly wasn’t working very well. “But,” Celestia interrupted Spike’s lingering thoughts, “If you continue as you have to lock yourself away from the world, you will only hurt yourself with your time lost.” That filled Spike’s mind with anger. “Then why are you sending me away!” Spike momentarily forgot how loud a dragon’s shouting was, as his voice carried well beyond his mountain home.

Celestia dropped her head. She hated having to do this. She had been putting this off for years, but she couldn’t bear to wait any longer for something terrible to happen. “Spike, you need to be with your own kind. I simply cannot allow you to stay here. My first duty is to the safety my subjects. I’m sorry, but you have to leave, immediately.”

‘So this was how Spike’s life in Equestria was going to end, was it? Cast out by my only friend? Fine.’ That was Spike’s final thought, before he spread his wings and soared away, leaving Celestia alone in his no-longer home, a heavy weight inside her chest, deeply sorry to the dragon for what she had just done. “One day he will understand”, The Sun Princess said to herself, before taking flight back to Canterlot.

Celestia had approached Spike shortly after Fluttershy had gone. “Spike, I’m sorry.” Spike could recognize The Princess’ voice anywhere, so he didn’t bother to turn to see who it was. He remained silent; he couldn’t even open his mouth to let out a greeting. “She meant a lot to both of us, I think you know that. I’m taking it just as hard as you are. But please listen to me when I tell you to try to learn to move on.”

Celestia’s words fell on deaf ears. All Spike could think about at the moment was his life crumbling around him, piece by piece as the years floated by. Eventually, he broke away from his thoughts, turning to face Celestia. “Cele, I’m scared.” Spike could see the pain the Princess’ eyes. “What is it you are afraid of, Spike?” The dragon fumbled with his words, trying to figure out how to phrase just right what he wanted to say.

“I’m afraid of things changing. Before long, I’ll be too big to stay in Ponyville anymore, and have to live in some dark cave in the mountains. Then one day I’ll have to leave Equestria, or I’ll smog up all of Equestria during one of my Draconian naps. I don’t want to leave my life behind.” Celestia walked up close to the dragon, they were mere inches from each other, although Spike still towered above The Princess.

“Spike, you are doing no good to Twilight’s memory by continuing to ignore everything she tried to teach you. You must stop focusing on what you have to lose, and enjoy what you still have before it is gone.” Spike groaned. That lecture was not one he liked to continue hearing, but he knew he had to embrace it at some point, as hard as it may be. “Remember, Spike, you’ll always have a place here.” Spike let out a little smile. “I’ll hold you to that.”

Spike carried in his claws the only item he kept with him as he soared through the sky; the gem Rarity had given him so many years ago. He always held onto it, it being the only gem he vowed to never eat. Eyeing his destination from above, he swooped down below. Ponyville Cemetery. Spike immediately spotted Rarity’s tombstone, having memorized its location from previous visits.

Engraved on the tombstone were the words “Rarity: Fashionista Extraordinaire”. Spike couldn’t help but smile. She died doing what she loved. Spike laid the gem he was carrying against the stone. “I’m sorry Rarity, but I have to go away for a long time. I don’t know when or if I’ll ever be back. I just wanted to stop by to tell you-” Spike choked on the words, before regaining his composure and finishing his thought. “I forgive you. I’m sorry I never got the chance to tell you.” With that, Spike flew away, tears in his eyes plummeting into the soil below.

Chapter Six

Chapter Six

The rest of the world wasn't very appealing to Spike. All manner of strange and terrifying creatures resided outside Equestria. Spike didn't know exactly where he was most of the time. He didn't care, though; none of it really felt like it mattered. The days slipped by in a blur, Spike never staying in one place for more than a day. Travelling the vast landscapes helt past the time by.

It had been more than 300 years since Celestia had banished him from Equestria, and Spike had never looked back on it. In that time, he had forgotten about his resentment for the Sun Goddess for locking him out; He also learned to finally get past the passing of his dear friends. It was all too late for him to learn his lesson though.

Out here, wherever 'here' may be, nothing was terribly friendly. So, Spike kept to himself, having nopony around to talk to anymore. Spike hated how that. He finally got over his crippling fear of making new friends, only to realize there wasn't anyone or anything who he could consider a 'friend' anymore. It made the time creep by rather slowly, despite his best attempts to occupy himself.

As much as he hated to admit it, hunting passed the time quite well. Spike loathed himself for letting him finally succumb to it, but he had to eat, and there was little plant life around to sustain him. He at least felt better about it in that most of the creatures he- Spike recoiled at the very thought, choosing instead just to skip ahead to the next part of his thought, -most of those creatures were murdering monsters too.

'Celestia was right. I am a menace.' The thought was a constant in Spike's mind. There was little solace to be had in the knowledge that he at least knew what he did was wrong. It didn't change the nature of his actions. He was glad that nopony he knew would ever know what he was doing. They had always known Spike as the gentle, kind dragon they all knew and loved.

That was really the only thought that kept him going anymore. Thinking about his friends, and the life he had. Everything was perfect. 'But, things always change. There isn't any changing that.' Spike let a little chuckle slip at the pun. Even if he couldn't stop things from happening, he learned not to let him get him down anymore. He was a proud, roaring dragon now. 'Okay, maybe proud isn't the best word.'

Spike slumped back onto the ground, the momentary burst of confidence the thought gave him having so suddenly slipped away. The ground felt rather soft, oddly enough. Perhaps he was just tired, he was nearing his first draconic nap, after all. Soon he would be slipping into unconscienceness, only to wake up hundreds of years in the future, an entirely different world around him.

The thought of waking up and things being different was no longer a prospect that intimidated Spike. As a baby, he had always been terrified of waking up one day and everypony would be gone. Now that they really were gone, Spike had little to fear. Time carried on, and Spike lived on. He didn't really consider it living anymore though. All he ever did was fly, hunt, sleep, repeat.

It was an endless cycle that Spike hated being unable to break himself from; there was no more enjoyment in his life, and there hadn't been for a long time. Spike found himself once again daydreaming of his past, wishing that he could go back, if only for a moment, to stop himself from making the mistakes he regretted so dearly.

'It's too late for that, though.' Spike shook the warm thoughts from his mind. Another thing he had learned with age was to stop holding onto his past, as it held him back from enjoying the future. Spike looked around at his surroundings. A barren wasteland, wrought with horrible abominations roaming its vast emptiness stretched for miles. 'Enjoy the future, yeah right.' Spike laid his head back down to have a quick nap.

Spike didn't know how long he slept, but he felt ancient. His bones ached, his wings felt heavy agains his sides, and his legs wobbled as he slowly tried to rise to his feet. It had felt like he was asleep for ages. Perhaps he had? Had he really just gone through a draconic nap? It felt as though it passed in an instant. Looking around, things didn't look terribly different, thought that was to be expected.

Spike had a sudden desire burst into his mind. He had to see Ponyville. Even if it was only for a moment, and then The Princess would cast him back to these dreaded plains, he just had to see his old home. So Spike took flight, the land around him being memorized, after all, he had been soaring above it for hundreds of years.

The trip felt like only hours, despite Equestria being days away from where he had started. The time really did fly by in his anticipation of being reuinited with his homeland. He had never beat his wings as hard as he had, not wanting to waste a single second in getting there. 'Maybe I can go see the Princesses while i'm there. I'm sure Celestia won't kick me out on sight. She would at least want to talk for a while, right?'

The sight of Ponyville was not what Spike had expected to see. He had hoped to see his quaint little former village home, but instead was met with the sights of high rising buildings, busy streets, and business ponies in tailored suits, marching around like they had somewhere important to be. His heart dropped. The last part of his life he still had left was gone; wiped off the face of Equestria like it was nothing.

Spike's presence wasn't exactly unknown to anypony, either. The towering creature looming over the bustling city of ponies had thrown them all into a panic, everypony running into the nearest building, screaming as they galloped away. Spike ignored them though, he had no plans to hurt them, so he felt no need to calm them. He chose instead to sit there, unable to fly away in such a grief stricken state.

Time creeped by very slowly for Spike. He left like had had been sitting in that same spot for days, until a voice called to him. "Spike? What are you doing here?" A familiar voice? Spike turned his head, seeing Princess Luna hovering at his eye level. Luna didn't show much sign of aging at all. A wrinkle here and there, but otherwise, Luna hadn't changed in the slightest in all those years.

Spike took a moment to find his voice. "I had to see Ponyville. I don't think it was a smart decision, though." Spike's head dropped, refusing to open his eyes as he listened to Luna's voice. "Of course it was a good idea, Spike. Everypony needs closure, even if it isn't always a happy ending." It had been a long time since Spike got advice from anypony, so it felt good to have that guidance again.

"I know. I just wish-" Spike couldn't find the strength in his voice to finish his sentence. So Luna did it for him. "That things didn't have to change? I know, Spike." The Moon Princess' voice was soft and sweet as she spoke. "But you're going to get past this, just like everything else, we soldier on every day. Tia and I do it too, you're not alone." Spike felt his anger slowly bubbling at that, but quickly recovered his solemn demeanor.

"You at least have each other. I've done this all alone." Spike never turned his head towards Luna as he spoke, so he did not see the pained expression cross Luna's face. "Spike-" She tried to explain herself before Spike interrupted. "It's not your fault, I know. Nopony is to blame here but me. I know it's not safe for me to be here. The bloodlust a dragon feels would have caused me to go feral on somepony at some point."

Luna wished there was something she could say to sway the dragon's feelings, but found no such words for it. So she opted to fly up to his face, and nuzzle against his hard scaled face. "I'm sorry Spike." Spike finally raised his head to look at Luna. "Sorry for what?" Spike looked into Luna's eyes, hoping he could find the answer in there while he waited on a response.

"I'm sorry it has to be this way. You don't deserve this fate, Spike. You were... are a good dragon. Anypony who knew you knows that." The sentiment managed to actually raise Spike's spirits, if only enough to bring himself to his feet. "Do you think I could go talk to Celestia?" Luna seemed to be taken aback by the question, before letting out a heavy sigh.

"You should go, Spike." It was Spike's turned to look surprised. Luna could tell the dragon was confused, and continued to explain. "A long time ago, our parents- A dragon killed our parents, Spike. That is why Tia sent you away. She never got over the loss, and she didn't want to see the same thing happen again." Spike was shocked; all the guilt he held over being a blood-thirsty murderer suddenly weighed a lot heavier on him.

A long silence resided over the two, and the surrounding ponies one by one exited the safety of the buildings to get a close look at the dragon conversing with the Princess of The Moon. "I'm sorry, Luna. I had held onto anger towards Celestia for years for sending me away. I feel so horrible for thinking it now." Luna's lips picked up at the sympathetic words.

"It's okay Spike, I moved on. And so should you." The two looked warmly into each other's eyes, each of them seeming to get a kind of comfort from it neither had felt in a long time. From Spike's eye, a large teardrop rolled from his cheek, and fell with a loud thud to ground. At this, a little filly approaching the distraught monster before her. "Are you okay, mister?" Spike looked down at the little filly and couldn't help but beam at her before her concerned mother pulled her away.

"Yeah, i'm gonna be fine." Seeing somepony who didn't see him as a monster was a heartwarming sight to Spike. Spike gave one last smile towards Luna, before taking off back towards the outer lands from Equestria. Coming here had proven to be a good idea after all. Of course it hurt Spike to see Ponyville disappear, but it was all for the best. He had closure now.

Spike lived a healthy life. He had surpassed a life of over 3000 years. Even for a dragon, that is a very long time. He had long ago given up any regrets, pain, and anger he had harbored over his many, many years. There was a kind of peace that came with age, one that teaches you to truly appreciate everything you have, or have had. Spike certainly did. His final years were bliss, as he had finally made peace with the tragedies and heartstrain of his life.

It was so nice to be able to just relax and appreciate the beauty of the world around him. Spike had returned to Equestria, as there was no longer any reason for him not to. There were no longer any ponies to be seen, no towns in sight, and Canterlot was but a memory. The land was as barren now as the lands he had occupied for long. He could still recognize where Ponyville once stood. That was something that would never leave his memory, no matter his age.

Spike laid his brittle body onto the soft grass of the vast meadow that was once Ponyville. This was exactly where he wanted to be in his last moment, and he was glad he was able to find the strength to still fly here before it happened. Spike lowered his head, and closed his eyes, silently waiting. When he would wake up, he would see his friends again. Eventually, Spike's breathing ceased. A smile never left his face. He was home again.

FIN

Author's Notes: Thanks everypony for reading! I hope you enjoyed reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it. (Although getting off my flank and stop putting off finishing this was a miracle in itself) I plan on doing more writing in the future, and am even open to story suggestions, should you have any. I may even create a side story to this, who knows. See you later, everypony!