Cake Makes Everything Better

by Diokno44

Rating: mature
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Other, Comedy, Random, Princess Celestia, Slice of Life, Sex, Twilight Sparkle
Length: 1480

Celestia gets intimate with cake.

One warm summer evening finds Celestia alone. Her marefriend has gone with her friends to Haytona Beach. Her sister is enamored in her games. Her adopted niece and nephew-in-law are enjoying their second honeymoon. This leaves Celestia lonely, bored, and in heat season, nopony to screw. To calm down, she orders a large amount of cake brought up.

While eating, she discovers a special cake, one that may sate her needs.

(This idea came about during a comment conversation with my friend Party Pop)

Published 2016-02-02 01:00:02 UTC
Last updated 2016-02-02 01:00:02 UTC

The Cakening

Princess Celestia was absolutely bored. No, she was more than bored. She was lonely, horny as all Tartarus, and slightly peckish. The Diarch of the Sun currently found herself in bed, staring up at the painted ceiling. She had hung a very accurate, detailed painting of Twilight's backside to try and calm her heat down. That had only inflamed her marehood even more.

"Why couldn't I go to Haytona Beach with them?!" Celestia groaned to the heavens. Images flashed through her mind. Twilight and her friends sunbathing. They were in the water, splashing each other with the cool salt water, a good distraction from the heat. Celestia jammed a felt pillow between her hind legs, grumbiling. "Get those thoughts out of your head Tia, they'll only make things worse." She muttered. Her trained ears could hear the sounds of explosions and weapons fire from her sister's room. She sighed, glancing at a closet near her bed.

Celestia rubbed her chin, Hmm. the immortal thought, as her hoof reached out. She pulled the door open, revealing various encased discs and manga booklets. "No, those won't do." She closed her stash of anime and manga, sighing. "There must be something I can do to either get off, or get my mind off this accursed heat." She said, slowly getting up. Celestia paced her bedroom, barely caring about the small droplets of clear, glistening fluid she was leaving on her bedroom floor. She could clean that up later.

Ideas raced through Celestia's mind. Perhaps she could play a game with her sister. That thought was quashed by how those games eventually turned out, causing a fierce blush to light up her cheeks. She bit her lit up as small squirt of her love juices dampened her legs. She mentally slapped herself, taking a deep breath. "Hmm," her thought process was interrupted by a deep rumbling noise from her mighty, some would say bottomless, stomach. "Perhaps some cake could get my mind off getting off." She poked her head out of the door. Thankfully, she managed to control her lust long enough to not jump one of her guards and start rutting them into the ground. She cleared her hoof, and looked at the bronze shelled Changeling to her left. "Excuse me, Private Second Life?" The mute mare turned her head, smiling slightly. "Could you p-please ask the Royal Chefs to send up some cake?" Second nodded, and trotted off to do her duty. Celestia sighed in relief, and retreated back into the comfort of her warm bed, slowly rubbing her dripping, puffy marehood against a pillow.

About twenty two minutes and fourteen seconds later, a knock sounded at her bedroom door. Celestia got up, stretching. She tossed the soaked pillow she had been straddling for the past twenty minutes into the Royal Hamper. She slid the door open, as a Minotaur heffer wearing a chef's apron and carrying multiple trays. "Ah, thank you Steel Horns." She took the cake trays, slid a few bits into Steel's breast pocket, and gently closed the door. Celestia utilized her magic, and her back, to balance the trays, setting them on her large bed. Celestia noticed a small midnight blue card leaning against one of the taller trays. Picking it up, Celestia read the message.

Celly, I know you've been lonely lately. Don't worry, this hoofmade cake should help you out.
Love,

Luna

Celestia smiled, chuckling. "Thank you Luna." She said, setting the card aside. "Hmm, maybe I'll save you for last." She set the cake Luna had baked aside. Both she and her sister were capable bakers. Their mother, Laurel Faustis had taught them, with some aid from their honorary uncle, Chancellor Pudding Head, or Doctor Chancellor Pudding Head the Fun, as he preferred to be called. Licking her lips, ignoring the warmth exuding from her moist nether lips, Celestia grabbed her favorite fork and knife, and descended upon the other cakes like some sort of pastricidal maniac.

After ten minutes of eating, Celestia was full. Her belly had buldged slightly from cakes. Her belly and mouth was coated in bits of frosting and cake crumbs. Swallowing the final slice, she turned to the cake Luna had made. "Hmm, now let's see-" Celestia removed the silver lid. Her jaw dropped, as she felt her marehood heat up like someone had lit a roaring fire beneath it. For she came face to face....

With a towering cake shaped like a well endowed, lightly glowing stallionhood.

Saliva ran down Celestia's face as she stared at the cake's shaft. It was dark purple, and immediately brought to mind a few heated nights of passion she and her futa spelled marefriend had shared. Each of the large, pillow like cake balls were emblazoned with her lover's beautiful Cutie Mark. Celestia giggled, "Ah Twily." She licked her lips,, "Now I wonder if you have some cream filling for me." Her tongue gently licked away the lavender flavored frosting, revealing a bit of creamy whipped cream and cake beneath it. She watched as the frosting resealed the small opening she had made. Celestia thought she had heard a moan, far away, yet near at once, as she licked the cock cake, but brushed it off. "Oh, self replenishment spell. Oh thank you Lulu." She giggled, her eyes sparkling, pecking the shaft, which was surprisingly warm to the touch. Once again she heard a moan. "Hmm," Her horn lit up, as she ran a spell scan on the phallic pastry. "Hmm, a connection spell to a futa'd Twilight, if this was meant to be a prank Luna, it worked wonderfully."

Celestia grinned, as her magic enveloped the cake shaft, stroking it lightly. Soft squeals and moans emanated from around the cake. The solar mare laid back, spreading her hind legs. "Let's have some fun Sparklebutt", she whispered sensually to the cake, hearing a gasp come from whereever Twilight was. Her marehood heated up, her slick juices spilled out of her marehood as she imagined Twilight, surrounded by her friends, as a massive flesh tower appeared on their friend, as she was bucked by an invisible mare. Letting out quiet mewls of pleasure, Celestia teased herself with the cake tip, getting frosting on the outskirts of her nethers. With a low groan, she slammed the cake deep into her, creating a small buldge in her stomach. Her juices slicked against the phallic pastry shaft. From the connection spell, she heard a muffled squeal of delight from Twilight.

With several millennia of expierence, Celestia alternated the thrusts, as the cake rod slid in and out of her. The frosting filled sack never went too long without rubbing against the royal plot, the rear end that so many of her subjects, and those in foreign nations, had dreamed about, clopped about, and drawn art about for centuries. Celestia and Luna both, in jest and admiration for the talents of the artists, had several wings in the castle dedicated to artists' renditions of their butts, as well as other parts It certainly kept guard morale up.

With a low moan, the Princess of the Sun let her juices slam into the cake with the force of a shower head. At the same time, the cake tip exploded, cake batter and vanilla frosting filling her with the force of a fire hose on steroids. Celestia panted, pulling the soaked cake out. Cleaning it up, she kissed it. She ate it, and knocked on her sister's room, not caring her mane and tail were disheveled, yet still flowing. Luna poked her head out, a knowing smirk on her face. Celestia blushed, clearing her throat. "Thanks sis." She smiled slightly.

"Eh, I know you miss her. I mean, I have Alucard, but still, immortal we may be, we have needs, like any other ponies." Luna said, chuckiling. "Now if you excuse me, I have some noobs to pwn before I start Dreamwalking. You may join if you wish, just remember, your powers are greatly diminished." She giggled, and slinked back into her bedroom, closing the door.

Celestia, exhausted, trotted back to her room. "It looks like I had my cake and ate it too." She chuckled to herself. Her heat had completely gone. Yawning, she snuggled under her covers, and fell asleep, sucking on her hoof.

Meanwhile, on Haytona Beach...

Twilight's chest rose and fell as she panted. She stared at her friends, all coated in her sticky stallion cream. "S-sorry girls." She chuckled nervously, staring at the disappearing phallus between her hind legs. "Celestia's a bit rough." With that, she fell into a state of unconsciousness, entirely spent.

Her friends, all covered in sperm, facehooved.

Author's Note

Why did I even do this? Anyway, for those of you who liked this...thing, and possibly pleasured yourself to it, know it was written by a virgin.