Rainbow Dash Becomes an Alicorn

by Vanilla Mocha

Rating: everyone
Tags: Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Spike, Comedy, Romance, Random, Discord, Crossover, Main 6, Drama
Length: 1427

Rainbow Dash thinks she is an alicorn, and things happen.

Reading the prequel is highly recommended. This story gets very random based off the first story, and the author's note is at the bottom of the story... So I figured I'd help y'all out and say that right here, right now.

It all begins with Rainbow Dash thinking she is an alicorn, and a lot of things happen.

Crossover tag because of Lolly Poppins representating Mary Poppins. Sorta. Take it as you want. I just don't want to break the rules.

Published 2016-05-06 21:30:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-05-06 21:30:01 UTC

"Bow down before me, peasant!"

It was a bright, beautiful day in Ponyville- wait, who am I kidding? Every time 'nothing's wrong', something's wrong. I guess that the 'something' this time was the horrorific events of the quesadilla incident. Let me explain.

About a week ago, Pinkie Pie told her friend, Rainbow Dash, to help her tie down the princess of friendship and to help her to get over her fear of quesadillas. Ever since then, Twilight Sparkle did not dare leave her castle.

"I can't, Spike, I just can't!"

The small drake watched as his sister-like friend paced her throne room in circles. "Why don't you just lie and say you ate one? Then they'll shut up about it."

Twilight paused. Angry, she looked down at Spike. "No, I can't do that! Lying is wrong- and then, they'll expect me to eat those terrible, cheesy, sloppy things!" Breathing heavily from both anger and anxiety, the princess sat down. "I... I didn't mean to yell, Spike... I just... I don't know what to do."

Spike sat down beside the princess. "It's cool, Twily. Hey, two questions..."

The alicorn looked down at him.

"One, what's so bad about the quesadillas?"

Twilight gasped. "What's so good?! I find them gross, unhealthy, and-"

"Ok, ok, fine, I get it." Spike chuckled.

"Second question?"

Spike put his claw to his chin, recollecting his thoughts. "Oh, yeah- do you hear that voice-"

Before he could finish, a loud crash could be heard. A cider bottle flew in from the window, leaving a huge mess of shattered stained glass behind on the floor. The glass bottle clinked onto the ground, chips from newly created cracks of the broken bottle covering the floor as well. On the other side of the window noponyelse other than Rainbow Dash could be seen hovering. She looked in the window, staring at Twilight and Spike's surprised faces.

The blue mare was wearing a pink striped birthday hat on her head. Flying into the castle, she landed with a plop.

"That voice!" Spike stammered, pointing at the sky.

Rolling her eyes, Twilight sighed. "That's Rainbow Dash. Rainbow, what the hay are you doing! You just broke my window with a glass bottle?! Please tell me you're sober..."

"Ah'm sober..." Rainbow stood up. She spoke with slurred speech: Twilight knew she was lying.

"No, Twilight, that wasn't Rainbow's voice, it was really weird... Sounded like someone was saying everything we were doing!" Spike said.

Twilight chucked. "Are you sure you're sober?"

Spike shook his head. "Twilight, c'mon, I'm hearing stuff... It's creeping me out."

"I'm hearing stuff too..." Dash stood up and waltzed over to the little drake. Leaning on him, she grinned. "Bow down before me, peasant!"

"Wha... Huh?" Spike mumbled.

"I sayed to bow-"

"Said. 'Sayed' isn't a word." Twilight corrected her.

"I sayed that, Spurke! Now bow down! I'm a princess!" Dash yelled.

Twilight blinked. "How..." Remembering her friend was drunk, she giggled. "Oh, Rainbow. You need a nap."

"Nap?! What am I, a foal? I'm an alicorn!" Dash flapped her wings.

"No... You're a pegasus, silly." Spike smiled.

Dash, now angered, pointed to the birthday hat upon her head. "Do you not see my horn?! Now give me more cider, I demand you!"

Twilight stared at Dash. Moments later, she burst out laughing. "Oh, oh gosh Dash, ha-"

Rainbow's face turned bright red. "What?!" She stomped her forelegs on the ground, "Are you disobeying the Princess?!"

"Rainbow, c'mon now," Twilight said as she calmed herself down, "Get some water, take a nap."

"Yeah, that might help!" Pinkie Pie chirped.

Twilight's eyes widened. Glancing behind her, she made a confused look. "Pinkie, how'd you get in here?"

"I dunno, really," Pinkie put her hoof to her chin and looked up to the ceiling. "It was that voice up there that sat me down here."

"You hear it, too?" Spike smiled, "Whew! Glad to think I wasn't the only one."

"Hey!" Rainbow Dash interjected, "I'm the princess here, see that? Now, I will set the laws by which you need to follow to live in Rainville."

"Rainville?" Twilight Sparkle sighed.

Dash nodded. "That's the first law. Everything here is named after me." Sitting down, she smiled. "Second law is that we don't blink."

"What sense does that make?" Twilight tilted her head.

"You don't wanna miss out on seeing the most prettiest princess in all of Rainville." Rainbow smiled crookedly.

Twilight grunted. "And how are we supposed to not blink?"

"I know! I know! I know!" Pinkie Pie jumped up and down excitedly, "We all blink at the same exact time! That way, no one sees anypony else blink, so no one really did it because there'd be no proof!"

"That sounds great! One, two, three, blink!" Dash quickly counted.

Pinkie, Spike, and Dash blinked. Twilight sighed, rolling her eyes. "This is ridiculous."

"I'll say," Lolly Poppins sang, "I need four crowns!"

Twilight facehoofed. "First Pinkie, now you?!"

Lolly Pop smiled. "The voice above suggested I join the story."

"What?!" Twilight blinked.

"Twilight, you blinked!" Dash pointed a hoof at the lavender alicorn.

"Yes, four crowns! I ate too much sugar and the rate of tooth decays terrible! I tried taking sugar with my tooth medicine but that only made it worse!" Lolly Poppins whined.

"For your punishment, I sentence you..." Dash put a hoof to her forehead, thinking. She smirked grimly. "A quesadilla!"

"What?! No!" Twilight shouted. "I am not eating one of those! Remember last week?!"

"I remember last week," Fluttershy smiled.

"How did you get in here?!" Twilight exclaimed, scaring the butter colored Pegasus.

"The... Narrator, I guess, sat me here," she whimpered.

Twilight's eyes widened. "What narrator?!"

"The one writing, of course." Discord smiled. He stood beside Fluttershy.

Twilight shook her head. "Maybe I'm the one not sober?" She asked herself outloud.

Pinkie Pie giggled. "Twi-light!" She sang. A cheesy quesadilla sat on her hoof.

"No!" Sparkle shouted.

"What's wrong, Twily?" Discord asked. He was now holding Fluttershy in his arms, stroking her mane. Fluttershy was purring like a cat.

"I don't like quesadillas!" She snapped.

Fluttershy sat up and nuzzled the draconaquess. "Maybe you'd like it if you gave it a chance."

Discord smiled. "I know I liked it." He kissed Fluttershy on the nose.

"Since when did you two-" Confused, Twilight was cut off by Rainbow Dash running into her. Dash bolted, throwing Twilight to the ground. "No escaping the iron hooves of the Princess of Dashville!"

"I thought it was Rainville," Twilight wheezed as she wrestled the blue mare.

"Either one!" Dash was wobbly but maintained to stay on top of her. Pinning the alicorn to the ground, she nodded to Pinkie.

Lolly Poppins smiled. "Look! We're playing pin-the-floor on the pony!" She giggled, "It's like pin-the-tail on the pony, but you put the floor on her instead!"

Twilight grunted. "Actually, I'm the one pinned, not the floor-"

Pinkie trotted up with the cheesy quesadilla in her hooves. "Ready for justice?"

"JUSTICE?!" Twilight had enough. She screamed, and her eyes filled with bright whiteness. Her horn lit up purple and pink, and in a flash of light, Rainbow and Pinkie were nowhere to be seen.

"Twilight," Spike whispered, "I'm still hearing that voice."

"Oh, so am I." Discord grinned, placing a hand on Fluttershy's back, pulling her closer to him.

The yellow mare blushed.

"Ugh, get a room!" Lolly snapped.

So, they did.

"Fluttershy, what are you writing?" Twilight asked.

"Oh! Um... Just writing a sequel to that one story Discord began to write, after all. Ended up having a cliffhanger. Heh..."

"Oh, well, can I see?" Twilight smiled.

*Meep* "I'm not sure that's a good idea..."

"Why?"

"Um... It's a story where Rainbow and Pinkie are summoned to a thousand year sentence on a star. I'd say the moon, but that's not your cutiemark."

"What?" Twilight asked.

"Actually... Never mind. I'll just... I'll just keep it for myself. Besides, I don't think anyone will actually read this."

Author's Note

No, I don't follow the "Drunk Dash" and "FiM Alcoholic Cider" stuff because I am against drinking, but I felt it'd work for the story. If you need them OOC, make 'em drunk, I guess. And don't make me the author. Blame it on Fluttershy. :fluttershbad:

...Don't take my advice. I'm terrible. :rainbowwild:

Anyways, thanks for reading! This is edited by the awesome Paradox Theory, and please like or dislike. If you disliked, please tell me why (nicely, preferably. Constructive criticism is always a good thing).