Lyra's Not So Average Life

by Sparx

Rating: teen
Tags: Owlowiscious, Discord, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Berry Punch, Lyra, Romance, Comedy, Bon-Bon, Sex
Length: 8288

When life in Ponyville becomes a little mundane, Lyra decides to spice things up.

When Lyra realizes that her life has become too normal for her liking, she starts experimenting with different hobbies, much to the dismay of Bon Bon. Lyra's antics inspire many of the denizens of Ponyville to start getting in on the action as well, making Ponyville an excitable comic wonderland.

My second fic, portraying one of my favorite background ponies of all time. Definitely expect some jokes about Lyra's unusual sitting and desire to be more human, but only as side jokes.

As always keep in mind the better received this fic is the more I'll wanna work on it, so please leave me comments, I do read every single one of them and they really help me move along with my story.

Credit for the picture goes to RandomMan on knowyourmeme.com

Published 2011-11-23 05:58:23 UTC
Last updated 2012-02-05 11:06:06 UTC

Lyra, Late for a Look

Lyra was leaning against her doorway, front legs crossed and cigarette hanging from her mouth. She'd adapted to standing only on her hind legs pretty well, though she was still a little wobbly. She took a deep drag and took the cigarette in her hoof, ashing it off the porch, letting out a large puff of smoke. She'd been able to do a lot more at one time now that she had her front hooves freed. "I gotta say, this was a pretty good move. Whoever knew that I would be so quick to learn new talents?" She grinned wide. "I think I should've had a cutie mark about having talents!" She chuckled then stopped, tapping at her chin. "What the hay would that look like?" She took another drag at her cigarette.

On top of gathering various hobbies and skills, Lyra had been researching and studying the layout and security of the royal Canterlot gardens. She hadn't forgotten her plan to free Discord, oh no. She had been putting to work her brilliant unicorn mind towards releasing the ever powerful god of chaos. Calculating, formulating, mapping and planning... And when that failed she would talk to her old friend Twilight Sparkle in the library, sitting around eating her chips while the lavender pony would answer her strange questions regarding the security force around the castle. Ultimately, her expert plan boiled down to visiting the castle in a tour and finding her way to Discord, arguing with whatever she saw... BRILLIANT! Lyra the bipedal pony, would also soon be known as a tactical GENIUS!

"Lyra sweetie, you coming inside for lunch?" Bon Bon called out.

"How about we skip lunch and I just come inside!?" Lyra laughed and let out some blue fireworks from her horn.

"Oh Lyra! I don't know what's gotten into you as of late, but I think I like it! We can eat later, come here Sweetcake!" Bon Bon walked over to the door, staring Lyra down with bedroom eyes.

"You bet your sweet ass Bobo!" Lyra put out her cigarette and walked over, forcing Bon Bon to the floor, mashing their lips tight together, forcing her tongue past her lover's lips. She felt the gesture returned with Bon Bon's tongue meeting her own. "Mmmmhmmmm Bobo that's nice!" The unicorn laughed as she felt lust well up inside her.

"Oh I know what you like Lyly, now get back down here!" Bon Bon pulled Lyra back down, kissing her deeply and stroking her lover's mane.

Lyra continued their kiss, only looking up for a moment. "Oh, shit!" Lyra pulled away from their kiss and looked rather panicked. Bon Bon had a look of disappointment across her face. "I'm so sorry Bon Bon, I have to go. The next train to Canterlot leaves in ten minutes! I was gonna go meet up with some friends and tour the gardens today. I'm so so so so so sorry Bobo." She gathered up a small pouch of bits and ran over to the door. "I shouldn't be gone too long baby. Hey you wanna come with?" She spoke quickly as if she was in a rush.

"Uh, no. I have some errands to take care of dear. Aren't you going to have lunch?" Bon Bon was a little confused and a lot disappointed. She was really looking for a good screw, she was even going to suck on Lyra's... She was going to do that one thing Lyra loved so much with her horn. All the energy and lust from mere seconds ago had left her.

"I'll take it to go love, in a hurry. You understand." Lyra stood up and took her sandwich in one hoof and ran out the door. "I love you Bobo, I'll see you later."

"I love you too... bye?" Bon Bon stared after her as she ran off. "Well... guess I'll go clop then."

Lyra ran, stuffing her sandwich in her mouth. It was a bit of a chore to chew the entire thing, and she almost choked trying to swallow it all down, but she managed. She made it to the train and gasped for air, leaning against a window. "Dammit, just when things were getting fun too. I'm sorry Bon Bon, but once I get back we'll break out that sexy saddle." Lyra giggled, then realized everypony else on board was staring at her after talking to herself and blushed. "Uh..." She gulped and stood straight, saluting for a reason even she didn't know. "Yes indeed, I was talking about having kinky saddle sex with my wife. Anypony who is uncomfortable with this information, please tune me out for the rest of this trip." Lyra felt her cheeks heat up with embarrassment. Some ponies just stared at her, mouth agape, she could hear one give a wolf whistle, almost every foal on board was having their ears muffled with their parent's hooves, and almost half the ponies stood up and walked out to the next car.

"What the hay is wrong with ponies like you?" One of the mother mares screamed out.

"I'm just being honest ma'am... I am truly sorry." Lyra gulped hard and sat down, bumping her front hooves against one another in embarrassment. "Note to self, being overly honest, does not seem like a worthwhile hobby."

"Yo! Lyra!" Lyra looked up to see who was calling her and saw a cherry colored pony who looked kind of wobbly waving towards her. "I had no idea you were into saddles, ya kinky fuck." The pony hiccuped and laughed.

"Heya Berry Punch!" Lyra waved back, happy to see her friend. "Saddles are more of Bon Bon's thing actually. How have you been?"

Berry Punch walked over and sat next to Lyra. "I been good hun. Pinchy's getting bigger every day, the sweet little thing. Gettin' quite the fuckin mouth on 'er though. NO idea where's she's pickin' that shit up." The earth pony let out another hiccup. "An' Romana been the same sexy bitch as always. Ah, I love those two ya know?"

"Romana?" Lyra hadn't heard that name before.

"Oh, sorry. I forget not everypony knows her by that name. Colgate?"

"OH! Awesome! How have you two been?" Lyra looked her friend over. It was obvious she was inebriated, but no more so than usual.

"She's back in my bed right now hun! Ain't it grand bein' young and in love?" Berry grinned and laughed. "I been thinkin' maybe she's 'the one' ya know? Kinda like you an' Bonnie. Ruby sure likes her, that's for sure. An' nothin's more important to me than my little Ruby Pinch's happiness... And a bitchin' bottle o' wine!" Berry laughed loutdly and hiccuped a few more times. "Say, when you and Bon gonna go drinkin' with us again?"

Lyra laughed. "You kidding? I'm still recovering from the last time."

"Aw that's a load o' shit an' you know it Lyra. You're the only pony who ever came close to drinkin' me under the table. C'mon." Another hiccup.

At the sound of this, another idea came to Lyra's mind. "Soon. And you can bet your flank I'll knock ya dead this time Berry. I'll be the best damn drinker in all of Equestria, even better than you!"

Berry Punch let out a laugh. "Ya ain't got the constitution hun. I like your spirit though. You could easily make second place." The pink pony stopped for a moment, staring at the wall before shaking her head. "What you headin' to Canterlot for anyway?"

"Touring the royal gardens. And you?" Lyra grinned.

"Well I guess so."

"Guess what?"

"Me too."

"You too what?"

"You just told me I was goin' to the gardens right?"

"No I was asking what you were doing in Canterlot."

Berry Punch gave a squinty, confused look back to Lyra. "Hun I don't even know half the things I do. I'm actually gonna get some fuckin' structure today and follow you."

"Probably a good idea." Lyra chuckled. While Berry was often drunk, she was in no way harmful. The earth pony had an astounding charisma and willpower, keeping her aware of what she did, so she was still able to function in everyday life. The two of them had known each other since elementary school, and even then Berry Punch had an unusual fixation with drinking whatever was around. The two were good friends, and Lyra was even Ruby Pinch's godmother. She remembered the first time she'd seen the little filly. Her dad was a unicorn Berry met at a bar. After an evening of 'unfulfilled expectations' as Berry once put it, she decided she was more of a mare's mare, a filly fooler. Though the sex wasn't fantastic, it had brought Berry the greatest happiness of her life, her daughter Ruby, AKA Pinchy.

Actually, Berry joining her would actually bring a fantastic opportunity. If what Twilight said was correct, than enough chaos should bring Discord to emerging again. What better way to bring about chaos than to have a drunk have her way with it?

Soon enough, the train made it's stop in the royal city of Canterlot and the duo found their way to the royal garden tour. Once they passed the sculpture garden, Lyra pulled Berry Punch aside and the two looked upon the statue of the mighty draconoquis. "Look at that Berry! A god, trapped in stone. Makes you wonder if all the other statues here are alive too eh?"

"What?" Berry Punch responded and not a moment later Lyra flinched at the sound of shattering stone. She turned around and saw Berry had walked backwards into one of the statues and caused it to shatter upon hitting the ground.

"Let's pray not." Lyra looked back to the statue of Discord. "So Berry... how do you feel about waking up a god?"

"Drunk."

"Besides that."

"Wasted."

"Forget I asked." Lyra groaned.

"What?"

"Exactly." The unicorn smiled with malice in her eyes. "The very embodiment of chaos and disorder, now a decoration in a hedge maze." She took in a breath of air to ready herself, then exhaled. "Berry, insult me real quick."

"You're a very beautiful pony and I'd fuck you if we were single." Berry Punch spoke without hesitation.

Lyra felt her cheeks turn red. "That's not an insult...Thank you...? But seriously Berry, come on, I can take it. Give me your worst."

Berry gave a stern angry look to the unicorn and hiccuped. "You bitch! You are one fucking amazing harpist. How dare you play so beautifully. And how Dare you.... you..." She began giggling in her inebriation. "You sit funny."

"Berry, you damn drunk. Is it really that hard to insult me? Come on!" Lyra crossed her front legs and tapped a hoof.

"How the hay should I know?" A hiccup, followed by a giggle. "Y'know you're makin' me wet with all yer fiesty talk. Wanna make out? Romana and Bonnie won't know. Promise!" Berry pursed her lips and made smacking noises as Lyra sighed and dropped her face in her palm.

"Are you really this drunk, or are you just messing with me?"

"Hay I dunno. I thought I was fuckin' with ya at first, but then I see the statue there turn into a goat... dragon... lion... thing... I think I'm hallucinating." Berry Punch grabbed at her head and let out a sigh.

"Wait... what?" Lyra turned around, her snout met the nose of Discord who was smiling back at her. "Well... looks like it worked..."

"But of course." Discord chuckled.

Two Turns Trio

"Why hello there little pony." Discord cackled, locking eyes with Lyra. "It's Lyra, isn't it? Lyra Heartstrings?" Lyra couldn't move herself, she could only gulp and stare. "I must thank you for releasing me once again. But why would you set free a god of chaos intentionally? You've seen what I'm capable of."

"I-I-I... uh... I was..." Lyra stammered and thought, before she gathered her composure and held her two front hooves in front of her ready to brawl. "I'm here to defeat you once again. Then I'll be considered a hero as well." She swung and hit Discord hard in the nose.

"Ow." He rubbed where she hit him, feeling for any blood. "That's not going to do anything you foal. You don't know the entire story yet." He continued rubbing at his nose and sat down on the pedestal he was being displayed on. "Haven't you noticed I haven't spread chaos abound yet? I could easily get away and do so."

Lyra thought for a moment. "So... What are you still doing here."

"Well for one, I'm interested in how a pony becomes bipedal, and two, you woke me up too early." Discord rested his head in his talon.

"I'm sorry, what? Too early for what? I thought you'd love to get out and spread chaos, especially sooner." This was strange, he wasn't acting anything like Twilight said he would. He hadn't used the slightest bit of power since he'd been unfrozen.

"Holy fuck. The statue is talkin'!" Berry Punch exclaimed. "I need ta lay off the booze. In fact, Imma sleep it off. G'night Lyra." The very instant she finished her sentence she collapsed to the ground in a drunken stupor, snoring.

"Now that's a pony I'd like to know." Discord chuckled. "So, you going to explain how you walk on two legs Lyra?"

"I practiced, so what? Would you kindly explain why you haven't plummeted Equestria into a thousand years of chaos?

"Like I've said Miss Heartstrings..." Discord looked back at Lyra for a moment. "Sorry, would it be Mrs. Heartstrings?"

"Of course." Lyra was not impressed.

"You've woken me up too early."

"And what do you mean by that? Does it matter when you've been released? I thought all that mattered to you was spreading chaos." Lyra looked a bit urgent. This wasn't the way she thought it would happen.

"I mean that there's a set plan for this. You see, it didn't happen the way you were told." Discord actually used his power for once, producing a pipe, glasses, and a book titled 'What Really went down with Celestia and Discord.' "You see, way back when Celestia and Luna were just little fillies with monochrome hair colors, I myself was a young, strapping lad myself. When I met the royalty, it was pretty simple to get along with them, they enjoyed my sense of humor and fun almost as much as I did. We actually grew old together, and I watched as they made the pony race what it is today. But in a world of ponies, such a dashing young draconoquis had no real place to fit in beyond the royal grounds. Even then, visiting ponies would have such a fright at seeing me, I had to hide away almost all the time. For as you see, the pony race was still young and ignorant, they weren't ready for such a terrifying creature to walk amongst them. I brought my concerns to the Princesses, and we all came up with an idea. I'd become one of their statues, and emerge every thousand years. We even made a game out of it. Celestia would send her best ponies against me to see how they would fare. I would be completely released when ponies would be able to love and tolerate me." Discord closed the book and handed it to Lyra. "Sorry, I don't do autographs."

"So... You're not a bad guy?" Lyra accepted the book and used her magic to store it in hammer-space, a spell she'd read out of one of Twilight's books.

"Of course not. I never hurt anypony did I? Take a look at what I did, I thought it was pretty funny. I mean chocolate rain! did nopony get that?"

Lyra looked at him for a moment. "You mean like the Hay Ponday song? OH! That's actually pretty hilarious now!" Lyra started to laugh.

"Ya see? It was all jokes." Discord chuckled along. "You see we don't always immediately try the villain act, Celestia calls in a few ponies first, a control group if you will, and then I'm introduced. We gauge their reaction, and if they take off in fear, then I go out and cause a bit of mischief until it's time to be frozen again. I play a game with the new generation of the Elements of Harmony, and then I sleep for another thousand years."

"Uh-huh. And if they don't?" Lyra asked, tapping a hoof against her chin.

"Then I'll be free to do as I please, possibly living with the princesses once again."

"And that's obviously not happened yet. How many times have you been frozen exactly?" When Lyra asked this Discord's face dropped to an annoyed expression.

"About four. It's taking longer than expected." He gave out a sigh. "They have shown signs of improvement. They don't run in fear anymore, and less and less even know who I am. Basically what I'm getting at is that while there are breakthroughs, they're taking too long for my liking."

"I'll bet. Sleeping in stone doesn't look too comfortable." Lyra looked Discord over. He wasn't nearly as intimidating as Twilight had made him out to be.

"Thank you for letting me out once again, at least for a few minutes, but I'm going to have to go back." He groaned.

"Wait. I let you out for a reason." Lyra stopped him as he walked towards the castle.

"Oh?" He gave her a hard look over. "I see. You want to be seen as a hero too, just like Twilight Sparkle and the others eh?" He paused and a grin grew across his face. "But that's not all, you're looking to change Equestria, make it more lively and fresh. Life's gotten too dull for you and you want to become so much more, as well as make your home even greater. Oh I like you Lyra Heartstrings, I like you alot."

"How do you?"

"Simple, you're quite easy to read my dear. I've gotta say, I like this idea. How 'bout you, me and your drunken friend over there go bring this idea to ol' Tia eh?" Discord floated about with a smile, and renewed joy. He was excited now. "I'm gonna make you big kid, just watch!" He came over and placed an arm around her shoulders. "Lyra, goddess of chaos! You like that?"

Lyra slipped out of his grip and pushed his arm aside. "Sorry, I'm taken already."

Discord chuckled and shrugged. "Doesn't hurt to ask. Ah well, at least there's still the princesses." Discord licked the palm of his talon and slicked his hair back, transforming it into long blonde locks. "They've always enjoyed my company."

The two woke Berry Punch, at first she thought Discord was just a drunken hallucination but he proved his existence. In her inebriated state she could only laugh at the fact. They explained their situation to her. "Y'know, I don't give a dayum! I'm jus' tryin' ta get through the day in one piece... wait no... Y'know... I think it'll be better if I just follow Lyra here an' stay outta trouble." She gave out a slight hiccup.

"That's one of the most sensible things I've ever heard you say Berry." Lyra chuckled. They helped Berry up and Discord snapped his fingers, porting them into the royal chambers. The guards were too stunned to react, and when they did, Celestia ordered them to stop.

"Discord, what are you doing out already? I thought my student and her friends sealed you away two weeks ago." Celestia walked over and let Discord hug her.

"Well, we have these two to thank." Discord leaned over and whispered into Celestia's ear. "The pink one was drunk, it was pretty amusing."

"Whadya mean was huh? You undereshtimatin' me? I'm fuckin' Berry Punch! ... No wait... I am Berry Punch... I'd like to fuck me though." Berry chuckled to herself and Lyra could only roll her eyes.

"And who are you?" Celestia turned to the unicorn.

"Me?" Lyra held a hoof against her chest. "I'm Lyra, Lyra Heartstrings, Your Majesty." Lyra gave a small bow and fell on her face. "Sorry, still getting used to walking on two legs." She pushed herself back up and regained her balance.

Celestia gave out a little giggle. "Only two? Why ever would you want to do that my little pony?"

Discord cleared his throat to get the princess's attention. "Actually that's why I'm here now Tia. You see, Lyra here has grand dreams, and she's released me to help her live out those dreams. So that's what we're here to ask. I'm going to make her big, and I need you to let me stay out to do that."

"Oh?" The princess's eyes grew wide as she listened. "Say no more Discord. I'll find a place where you can live in secret." She turned to Lyra. "And you can make your plans with him there Miss Lyra."

Lyra smiled and bowed, actually managing to stay on two legs this time. "Thank you Princess. And, I'm married actually."

"Oh, my apologies, Mrs. Lyra." Celestia giggled.

"Ah, young love. You remember when we would talk about such things Tia?" Discord Smiled as he placed an arm around his old friend's neck.

Celestia's horn glowed and forced his arm off. "Uh, Discord, that was a long long time ago." She blushed and looked to the floor.

Discord chuckled. "Don't worry, you're not my type either. No, this time around I've taken an interest in another pony. If you could, I'd like you to send her over some time if possible." Discord pulled a roll of paper out from behind his ear and unraveled it in front of Celestia.

The princess chuckled. "I thought you'd taken an interest in her. I'll send her out tomorrow old friend, she should be of use to you three as well."

With that the trio thanked the princess and left. Discord had shifted his appearance to a pegasus pony with two spirals, one black and one red on his flank as a cutie mark. He kept his goatee and brown coat with a grey mane and tail. "So where do we start?" Discord asked; Berry let out a hiccup.

Lyra stood proud with one hoof on her hip and the other pointing forward. "Ponyville my friends! We head for Ponyville!"

Drunken Discord Disco

Lyra walked over to the shack they had been keeping Discord and knocked at the door. There was a creak and she took a step in. Closing the door behind her she looked in front of her and saw Discord and Berry Punch sitting and laughing. Discord was in his usual shape. When Lyra had questioned him on why he didn't just stay a pony over these thousand years, he explained that it was very uncomfortable changing shape for long periods of time, and that time passed quicker while he slept anyway. That being said, he would only be in his pony form when he was out and about Ponyville, though he rarely did so unless accompanied by Berry or Lyra, and since Berry wasn't exactly the most responsible pony, he would be accompanied by Lyra most often.

"Welcome back Lyra. Berry and I were just talking about her home life, and I must tell you, I think it's hilarious how much fun she can be in this state. And you say she's always like this?" He chuckled to himself.

"I can shtop when I wanna... I just don' wanna." Berry hiccuped and laughed. "Hows else am i gonna indulge in my ssss... wat?" Berry looked around a bit confused.

"Every time I've seen her she's been like this. Only time I haven't was when we were fillies." Lyra chuckled. "So tell me Discord, how have you enjoyed your stay here so far?"

"Not too bad Lyra, not too bad at all. I mean this shack is a little worn down, but I think I like it better this way." He stretched out on a wooden chair and held his head up with his arms. Suddenly a spark shot into his eyes and he smiled wide. "Today is the day!"

"FINALLY!" Berry walked over to a drawer and pulled out a bottle of wine.

"No not for that." Discord chuckled.

"Whatever, I don't need a reason." Berry pulled the cork out with her teeth and started guzzling the bottle.

"What day is today exactly?" Lyra asked.

"Why it's the day the princess promised to send over the friend I requested, you remember?" Discord couldn't stop beaming. "I've been waiting to talk her for quite a while now! Wait! I have to clean!" Discord snapped a talon and the run down shack became quite a large and fancy ballroom. "There we go."

Lyra was rather impressed with how nice the place looked. "Wow, this must really be somepony special. Could I know who?

"Oh you'll find out soon enou-"

"If it's my Pinchy, I swear to Luna I'll run you down wit a steam roller an... an..." Berry Punch giggled in a drunken blush. "Is it me? I gotta say, sorry pal, but I'm not into guys anymore. But if ya paid me, maybe I could-"

"As I was saying..." Discord snapped a talon and Berry's mouth grew a zipper and zipped itself shut as she continued making throaty noises from behind the thing.

"It's the pony I've admired since I've first seen her, a brilliant pony who enjoys the benefits of chaos and discord." Discord smiled as he continued, then the doorbell rang. "That would be her now!" Discord appeared next to the door in a flash and swung his hand as if he were welcoming somepony in, and the door opened, revealing a very bright and happy Pinkie Pie. "Hello Pinkie Pie! It's good to see you again!"

"HolyshititreallywasPinkiePieohmyLuna!" Berry Punch had managed to unfasten the zipper and let out a gasp of surprise. "Lyra you totally owe me money now..."

"We never placed a bet." Lyra responded.

"Oh right... that was with Romana... I'll just have her buy me another drink, probably what I'd spend it on anyways." Berry chuckled.

"So wait it's Pinkie who you've got the hots for?" Lyra asked.

"Well if you're going to put it bluntly then yes." Discord swooped up the pink pony in his arms before she could even speak.

"The Princess sent me a letter telling me Discord wanted to see me and at first I was thinking 'why would I talk to a statue?' And then it said that we would be throwing him a party so I said 'well DUH I'm going to go now.' And here I am!" Pinkie Pie smiled from Discord's arms.

"You're... not afraid of him?" Lyra looked a little confused.

"Of course not silly. How could you be afraid of the guy who made chocolate rain?" Pinkie Pie laughed.

Almost as if on cue a cotton candy cloud popped into view above Pinkie's head. She opened her mouth and stuck out her tongue and it began to rain chocolate into her mouth. "You see, Pinkie Pie here is an agent of chaos much like myself. Controlled chaos, but still chaos. So she has no reason to fear me." Discord smiled.

"And Discy here has more in common with harmony than you'd think. You don't think all those animals he's made of would work together like that unless they harmonized do you? That'd be, like... beyond crazy!" Pinkie Pie stated, letting the chocolate milk rain upon her head before returning to her drink.

Discord looked into space, a little puzzled. "You know, I never thought of it that way...huh."

Lyra looked at the two of them and couldn't help but smile seeing the two of them. She feltlike this image was natural, almost meant to be.

Pinkie reached up and scarfed down the cloud with all the chocolate left inside. "Now let's get this party started!"

"FUCK YEAH!" Berry Punch belched out from the floor.

Pinkie Pie jumped out of Discord's arms and ran off, returning with her party cannon, blasting the shed with various decorations and festive ornaments. Discord helped out with a few snaps to create refreshments and quite a few bizarre decorations of his own than nopony could quite make out.

About an hour or two passed by before the only pony still standing was Lyra herself. Berry was still conscious, but just barely as she sucked on the opening of an empty wine bottle. "Shelishtia dommot..." She muttered, Lyra could only chuckle. She'd never known anypony who could bring Pinkie to her knees but Discord wasn't just anypony. She shook the draconoquis awake and motioned for him to meet her outside.

"So you, Berry, Pinkie and I are the only ones who know 'bout you hanging out with us normal ponies. But what our main focus will be is to make you known once more before I 'defeat' you once again. Should be easy to get everyponys attention, heck those two could do that part themselves. Beyond that, you have any idea on a plan?" Lyra crossed her front legs and tapped at her chin.

Discord had shifted back to his pony form. "Plan? Chaos has no plan my dearest Lyra, though it does have a chain. Each link I have set up has the chance of breaking and causing the reaction to fly off course. To counter this my dear Mrs. Heartstrings, I've set up multiple chains involving you, myself, Pinkie Pie and Berry Punch for any possible breaks in the initial chain. Now I won't tell you any details in this chain, makes it much more interesting that way you see, though you must show up with your heroic entrance, work on some form of catchphrase if you'd like, just make it good and powerful."

"Sounds kind of sketchy. How will I be able to help you if I don't know what's going on?" Lyra rubbed the back of her neck nervously.

"Trust me, if you didn't you wouldn't have gotten this far would you?" Discord held out his front hoof to shake. "Partners?"

Lyra smiled and answered his hoof with her own. "Partners!"

"Alright, then let's go make some CHAOS!"

Chain to Chain

The next day, Discord and Lyra met up in the center of Ponyville to prepare for their arranged 'battle.' "You know what you're doing?"

"But of course." Discord Replied. "Have you worked out your big entrance?"

Lyra nodded. "You ready?"

"I'm always ready, are you?"

"Let's go." Lyra punched at the sky for emphasis and Discord nodded, running off out of sight. Lyra walked over to a nearby building and leaned her back against it as she waited on Discord to make his move. It didn't take long before she noticed strange things start to occur. She turned her head and saw a fish running around like a mad man with what she interpreted to be 'human' arms and legs, screaming at the top of his lungs. The very sight of such a thing made Lyra catch a laugh in her throat before letting out a hard and loud guffaw. On top of that, she was pretty sure she was the only one who could identify the limbs as human, having studied the mythical species almost her entire life. She watched the shrieking man-fish thinking of the legendary merfolk she'd read about before, and how this must be some hilarious misinterpretation of the concept. Looking around she noticed that everypony else was watching the anomaly as well, some laughing almost as hard as her, others looking frightened and confused. "Looks like that might be my cue that he's started then. Just gotta keep an eye out for the guy."

No sooner had she said that than another strange mutant fish came running about the town screaming. Soon there was an army of the screaming 'merfolk' with Discord taking up the rear, large and quite intimidating. "Citizens of Ponyville! This is a takeover, bow down to your new god, and perhaps I will allow you your normal forms." Sure enough the ponies all began shouting, screaming and running about town to try and avoid the chaos. As Discord stomped down the road, houses started floating upside down, the roads became clouds with the clouds becoming small floating islands. Then came the signature chocolate rain clouds. Lyra watched him as he let loose for a bit, before walking into the center of the town.

"Discord! Stop right where you are! LYRA DEMANDS IT!" She grinned and called out in a mighty voice.

Discord laughed loudly. "As if I would take orders from a simple pony. How do YOU plan to stop me alone little Lyra?" He played his part very well and sounded convincing even to Lyra herself. "You face a GOD! Come my minions!" From behind Discord emerged Pinkie Pie and Berry punch with red glows in their eyes. The two were acting as if they were under Discord's control, issuing statements like 'Yes Master Discord' or 'Well DUH!'

"Oh no they have Pinkie!" Lyra could hear Twilight's voice call from over at her left. The blue green unicorn smiled and fired a blast at Discord that looked fierce, but was ultimately just a magic light.

"Augh! How can this be? Only the Elements of Harmony can stop the mighty Discord. Except..." Discord looked almost horrified, with Pinkie Pie following the action. Berry Punch paused for a moment, realized what the two were doing then joined in as well, quite half-assed and unconvincingly. "You can't be... Lyra HEARTSTRINGS?!?! Are you?"

As hammy as all this sounded to Lyra, she kept playing along. "The one and only Discord."

"Ah I see, the pony of legend who would seal me away permanently eh? Well we'll see to that. ATTACK!" And like that, Pinkie and Berry charged at Lyra with ferocity. Lyra could feel a tugging at her mind, forcing her body into action, and she found herself pulling off impressive martial arts that she never knew she could do. She blocked and punched and kicked against the other two ponies without making a conscious move. She looked over and saw Discord wink. He was using her almost like a puppet, and not just her, but Pinkie and Berry too. They all looked like they were in some old kung-fu movie, fighting with incredible agility but never actually harming one another. Lyra made various war and battle cries and the other two joined in. The three were suddenly lifted into the air where they continued their orchestrated battle, causing everypony to look up at the three in awe. Suddenly, ONE! TWO! Lyra was lead to hitting them both on their head, causing them to fall. She felt her body fly to the ground, land on her back hooves, and catch the two ponies on her shoulders, placing them down gently.

In a very intimidating glance, Lyra looked up to Discord. "You're up to bat Discord!"

Discord looked quite terrified, but then grew a smile and snapped his talon once again. "Not until you get past my chaotic army Lyra my dear." Lyra was instantly surrounded by the legged and armed fish on all sides. "Mermen, ATTACK!" The fish screamed in horror and charged Lyra. Lyra was reminded of Yoke-u from her favorite show Dragonball P, and came up with an idea she thought would be cool. She began screaming as her horn gave a brilliant glow. Small pebbles and rocks floated up around her, and her mane flew up violently. She created the image of golden flames flying around her as she continued to scream.The fish folk were no longer screaming as they looked in bewilderment. Lyra screamed gradually more and more violently as the pupils began to vanish from her eyes. Discord looked over at her, jaw dropping.

"HYAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! GRAAAAAAAAAAAAH!" Lyra called out louder and louder as her mane began to glow. The environment around her began to quake and the ground beneath her legs started to crack as she continued the process. It almost sounded like she was in pain. Then she stopped screaming, and smiled looking up at Discord, a look of wrath upon her face. Then her mane spiked itself tall and gained a bright golden sheen to it. She smiled as her pupils returned to their place. "You ready Discord?"

In an almost hammy act Discord shouted. "Then I was right! You are the pony of legend! Lyra Heartstrings... A Super Stallion! But how is that possible? How can a mare become a Super Stallion?"

Lyra went along with the act, keeping up the illusion. "Just call it magic bitch." Lyra let loose a blast from her horn that swelled from the area she stood and engulfed the fish in it's light. From inside the light she knew it was a simple brightening spell, bue could see as the fish were ported away as they were taken in. Soon all the fish disappeared and she let down the light spell revealing to the rest of Ponyville that she had 'obliterated' the fish with Pinkie and Berry left unscratched. "Now get your ass over here."

Lyra's Lost Life

Lyra sat on her couch watching TV, the only light being the embers from her cigarette and the screen. She could hear Bon Bon working in the kitchen one room over. "Lyra, I hope you're not smoking again, you know I can't stand the smell."

Lyra let out a sigh. "Sorry Bon, I'm just thinking." She pulled the stick from her mouth and put it out on the ashtray next to her with her magic, not even looking away from the screen. Smoking in Equestria wasn't dangerous, but it wasn't too attractive either. For one, the smell of burning clovers was not a favored smell around Ponyville, no matter what enchantments unicorns found, they couldn't combine the relaxing spell combine with an odor extermination spell. "Clears my mind you know?"

"I know honey, but I'd prefer if you did that outside." Bon Bon's voice called.

"Of course baby." Lyra called back, eyes still transfixed on the television. The unicorn flipped from channel to channel to see what else was on. Celebrity gossip in Ponywood, interviews with DJ PON-3, plans for the weather patrol, and the newest product the unicorns in Canterlot have come up with. Lyra let out another sigh due to boredom and got up onto all fours. "I'm heading outside baby. Don't wait up." She walked outside into the night air and levitated another cigarette from the case she had outside, lighting it up with their oil lamp. She took a drag and looked out into the night sky. "By Luna's moon, her night is beautiful." Lyra smiled as she reflected on her night three years ago with Bon Bon. They shared their first kiss after telling one another how they felt. Lyra had captured Bon Bon's eyes, as well as her ears with her performance on her harp. Lyra Heartstrings fell deeply in love with Bon Bon that night, while playing the most romantic tune she knew. It was a night much like this one. Lyra looked to the door she just came out of and levitated her harp over towards her. She sat down on their porch swing, back against the seat as she held the harp in her front leg and ran the other across the strings. She played the song note for note like she did long ago. The notes rang out through the stars in the sky, soothing anypony near enough to hear it. With her eyes closed and legs playing, Lyra lost herself for a moment, so when she opened her eyes she was surprised to see she had attracted a visitor.

"Who!" It was an owl, perched right on the wooden railing.

"Hey, you must be Owlowicious! Twilight told me about you before. She said you were a great helper." Lyra set her harp down on the seat next to her.

"Who." The owl replied.

"Twilight. Y'know, your friend Twilight Sparkle?" Lyra chuckled. "Look at me, trying to take what you say literally."

"Who?"

"Me, Lyra."

"Who?"

Lyra's smile fell to half. "Who is Lyra?" She took another drag at her cigarette. "That's a very good question. I haven't done very much in the past two years. I go out, play in the street and the park, make a few bits, come home and watch TV." She ashed her cigarette and let out a puff of smoke. "I should have a little more going for me right now. Don't get me wrong, I love Bon Bon and living with her has made my life so much greater, but..." She hesitated, and the owl looked at her, waiting for an answer. "I was supposed to be so much more than a layabout, watching cartoons for little fillies day in and day out." Lyra took a final drag on her roll of clover before dropping it in the outdoor ashtray. "I was gonna be LYRA, the pony of many talents, even without hands! ...When did I become so bland?" She looked to the nocturnal creature as he let out a hoot and gazed back at her, as if he was expecting something to happen. "What? You waiting on something? Or you trying to tell me something?" He only spun his head around and continued to gaze at her with his large owl eyes. "Forget it, I have to support Bon Bon. She wouldn't approve if I missed a meal, came home late, skipped out on-"

"Who!" Owlowicious interupted Lyra's rant.

"Bon Bon. My wife. She's back there in the kitchen getting dinner ready to go."

"Who! Who-hoo!" He hooted with a bit more urgency.

Lyra looked him over, trying to understand what he was saying. "You have a point... I do kind of let Bon Bon run everything I do anymore. I love her but she's become kind of restrictive as of late." Lyra began tapping a hoof against her chin. "Y'know Owlowicious, you're right. Bon Bon didn't fall in love with a lazy mare who sits around gaining weight. She loves Lyra, the awesome unicorn who mastered sitting like a human and the art of the harp! Lyra, the pony who was gonna change Equestria. She'd want me to do this, even if she doesn't realize it. I don't wanna end up in one of those relationships where the couple argue 'you're not the same pony I fell in love with' and all that crap." Lyra stood up with renewed vigor, she was determined. "She'll have a wife she can be proud of! An awesome unicorn who mastered not only the harp, but...but... uh... I'll master a lot of other things is the point I'm trying to make." She looked down and realized she was only standing on her hind legs. "Would ya look at that. Let's have this be the first thing!" She announced happily before falling over backwards. "BY CELESTIA'S BEARD! I WILL WALK ON TWO LEGS!"

"Celestia doesn't have a beard darling!" Bon Bon called from inside.

"RIGHT!" Lyra brought herself back up to four legs, and balanced herself back to two legs, holding against the wall for support. She grinned and looked back up to Owlowicious. "Just watch little buddy, soon my name will be bigger than the Wonderbolts, Celestia, PON-3, Photo Finish, Fluttershy and everypony else altogether! Lyra, the pony who changed Equestria!" She thrust her front legs into the air with an array of blue fireworks erupting from her horn. "BON BON! PUT EVERYTHING ON HOLD AND GET TO THE BEDROOM! I'M TAKING YOU FOR A RIDE!"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The next morning, Lyra teetered on her hind legs as she attempted walking over to Sugarcube Corner for her first show. "This isn't so bad. A little wobbly but not bad at all. I may have fallen down a time or... 6, but I'm sure everypony does whenever they try this... if anypony has ever tried this..." She swung her hooves to try and keep her balance as she almost fell over once again. "Well, if I am the only pony to try this, then that makes it all the more special." She smiled to herself as she thought that, seeing the building approach her vision. When she got to the door, she was greeted by a blur of pink fur and mane bouncing around her.

"Lyra's here! Lyra's HERE!" Pinkie Pie zoomed around the blue green unicorn. "We've been so excited for you to join us for Gummy's party! Hey, why are you standing like that?"

Lyra worked hard to maintain her balance, finally stamping down and holding her front legs to either side, letting out a sigh of relief. "I just thought I'd try it out. Y'know, keep it fresh."

Pinkie Pie let out a giggle. "You sounded a little like Dashie just then. Everypony is inside! Come on!" As soon as she had rushed out, she had rushed back in. Lyra looked in amazement, she never saw anypony have as much energy as Pinkie Pie. She waddled on inside where she saw nopony but Pinkie and a number of animals.

"Uh, Pinkie, is this just a party for everypony's pets?"

"Well, duh silly filly. Everypony else is out tonight, so they left me in charge of pet sitting! So I decided, why not throw a party for all of Gummy's friends! See, there's Tank, Winona, Opal, Angel, Owlowicious, and of course Gummy. Also look! Philomena is joining us today!" The phoenix flew in from downstairs at the mention of her name, beautiful and elegant. "Princess Luna was talking to Twilight, and then Twilight was talking about how we were having a pet party! So Princess Luna asked me if she could have Philomena come over to have fun too, and I was like of course she can, there's never too many guests at a Pinkie Pie party! So when I heard that Royalty was coming I though I would have to have some of the prettiest music I could find. I thought about asking Tavi, but she's too serious and her music always makes me kind of sad, and I always found your music to be much much much prettier!"

Lyra took a second to absorb everything that Pinkie had just said, but eventually she put it all together. "Well thank you Pinkie Pie." She turned and bowed her head towards Philomena, impressively keeping her balance as well. "It's an honor to play for such a regal guest." Lyra brought a sparkle to her horn and her harp appeared in a puff of magic. Looking around the room she noticed that all of the animals besides Opal had a party hat on. The Persian cat instead, had a shredded mess of colored paper and string next to her. "Any requests?"

"Um... do you remember that really pretty one that you played for Bon Bon at your wedding? The really pretty one? Could you play that one?" Pinkie Pie bounced happily in place.

Lyra remembered the tune well. "Of course! That's my favorite one, I hope Our guests enjoy it too." Lyra began playing, gliding her hoof across the strings. For some reason she found it easier to stand while she played the notes. It soothed her nerves and she saw all the other animals calming down as well. She closed her eyes and let the music take her back. She continued to play, and she began to let notes ring out of her throat as well. She had a beautiful voice but never put lyrics to her songs so much as more tones. Bon Bon loved to hear her sing and Lyra loved to sing, though she hadn't done so in recent times.

After the party Pinkie Pie handed over a pouch full of bits to Lyra who accepted them graciously. She stepped outside and started walking home. Owlowicious came out and landed on her shoulder, the unexpected weight made her fall back to all fours. Owlowicious gave a hoot and Lyra looked up at him. "Hey there buddy. You enjoy the show?" Another hoot. "Y'know I think I'm beginning to understand you now." Lyra chuckled a little. "And thank you by the way." The owl gave out a series of hoots in response. "Well I'm going to go home and-"

"Hoot-hoo-hoo!" Owlowicious interrupted.

"Oh! RIGHT! My goals! I almost forgot Owlowicious... don't look at me like that. Can't expect me to remember too much from last night after Bon Bon and I-" The owl hooted in objection. "Sorry, I got carried away.." Lyra blushed a little. "Just let me tell ya that pony sure knows how to please me like nopony can! So! First thing's first. I've been trying to walk on two legs as you saw." She lifted herself back up on her hind legs, catching her balance. "Not too easy but I think I'm getting it down. Now as for what to do next..." Lyra took in her surroundings. In the sky she saw the pegasi flying by, pushing clouds and doing tricks. "Nah... we'll try flight later. What I really should try, has to be awesome, something that will grab somepony's attention, something like..." She noticed a television in the window of one of the shops and walked over, pressing her front hooves against the glass. It showed the statue of Discord being placed in the royal garden. "That's it! I'll stop the god of chaos! AGAIN!"