The life and times of Lafayette Ryder

The day goes by quickly; Dallas and I talk, Twilight, the boys, and I eat, we find Dallas an apartment to live in until I can build him his own house, and then I spend some quality time with my family. Thaddeus and Starbright are growing so fast, they’ll both be enrolled in Ponyville elementary soon, and now they can already read and speak fluently. I guess I’m doing a pretty OK job at being a dad. We have some sort of casserole for supper, Thaddeus and I opted out and had bratwurst instead, and then we sit outside with Twi as she observes and records a meteor shower. The boys switch back and forth from playing to watching the falling stars to fiddling with the various pieces of equipment lying around and annoying their mother, I just lie back in a lawn chair (Gahh, my heart.), watch Luna’s night sky, and relax. Before I know it I’m drifting off and instead of Twilight’s voice I hear Dulcie’s.

“Hey there sleepy head,” She mocks me. “I have some great news.”

“And what would that be?” I ask.

“I’ll tell you in a bit, right now I have some other things to discuss with you.”

“OK, go.”

“Well,” she sits down on a lawn chair next to me and crosses her legs. “First off we have to do something about Jeff; we can’t just have him jacking around in your mind all the time.”

“It’s fine,” I cut her off. “I can control him now, just like all the others, just like you.”

She rolls her eyes at me and offers some gummy bears. “Sure, whatever you say. Second thing, we need to do something about your Parkin…”

“I’m fine,” I growl as I interrupt her a second time. “I am perfectly fucking fine, the only thing wrong with me is people thinking I’m not OK, got it?” I try to sound convincing but my unsteady hands give my bluff away. Dulcie frowns at me.

“Lafe, I’m just bringing these things up because I care about you, more than you realize, and I don’t want anything to happen to you. I’m sure all your friends feel the same.”

I grumble.

“Fine,” she sighs. “I’ll take your word for it that you’re OK, now the third thing; God is sending people here.”

“Why?”

“Remember that bible story about the great flood?”

“Yes.”

“Well he thinks it’s time for another one.”

“But he said…”

“What he said,” Dulcie corrects me. “Was that he would never flood the earth with water again.”

“So what is he planning to use this time?”

“Zombies.”

“Goddammit.” I facepalm.

“So anyway,” she continues. “He has decided to use Equestria as an ark.”

“So afterwards all the people will go back?”

“No, they will stay here permanently and start a human colony, God plans to put a new race of humans on Earth and try again. Oh, guess what?”

“What?”

“You were supposed to guess.” She tells me. I sigh.

“I get to be the leader of these people, build their colony, keep the peace, and uphold national relations?”

“Damn,” Dulcie says shocked. “You’re pretty good at guessing games.”

“Aw fuck me.” I mumble under my breath.

“Don’t think like that, think positive!” Dulcie tries and fails to lighten my mood.

“So when will these people start getting here?” I ask the angel.

“One will show up tonight, all the rest will start showing up next Tuesday.”

“And these are the people God chose to save because they’re good?”

“Nope, because they’re necessary.”

“Ugh,” I moan in frustration. I take a couple of breaths and calm down. “Since we’re talking about God, can I ask an important question?”

“Sure.”

“How does the big man feel about human/pony relationships of the… you know… sexy kind?”

Dulcie glares at me. “Lafe, bestiality is bestiality.”

“Aw shit, am I going to hell now?”

“No, actually if anyone gets in trouble for bestiality it’ll be Twilight.”

“What?”

“Ponies are three rungs up the evolutionary latter from humans,” Dulcie explains. “If anyone is fucking an animal it’s her.”

My jaw drops. “Well I guess Caila was right all those times she called men animals.” I say.

“Who is Caila?” Dulcie asks.

“Oh, an old dyke friend of mine.” I tell her.

“She sounds like a nice girl.” She tells me.

We sit together and watch the dreamscape flow for a few minutes before I break the silence.

“So who are we getting tonight?” I ask.

“Me,” she says slowly. “And your daughter.”

I look at her for a second until her words click. “But you said we’d only get one person tonight.”

“I did, you are.”

I stare at Dulcie. “How?”

“I died in the world I was comfortable in, remember I told you that already, and I became an angel in another world. I met Cameron there and helped him out. I fell in love with him. When my story there ended, not the story in the book you read, my story, I came here to guide you. Now that everything is in place God is giving me another life.”

I smile at the thought of having my daughter back but frown at something else. “All these years I’ve loved you Dulcie, not as a father but as a lover. You loved me back in the same way, but we…we’re…Oh God.”

“I didn’t know until just a while ago when God told me his plans. Neither of us knew so neither of us are to blame for our words or our, now regrettable, actions.” I look at her with tears in my eyes.

“What do we do now?” I ask.

“I land in the Everfree, you just need to wake up.”

“Wake up”

“Wake up Lafayette.”

“Wake up papa, you’ll miss the show!”

I wake up.

Dulcie’s gone and in her place are my boys and my wife trying to awake me so I can see the finale of the meteor shower. I sit up and think; Dulcie, daughter, Everfree, now. I look at my boys and smile; I look at Twi and tell her I’ll be right back.

I run.

My feet carry me to the entrance of the woods by Fluttershy’s old house, now a veterinary hospital, they carry me into and through the darkness, they carry me out the other side, they stop.

Standing in the moonlight is Dulcie, both my Dulcie and the angel Dulcie in one person, her wings stretch out to either side and her breastplate reflects the moonlight and the ripples of the water. I walk up to her, she looks at me, and we embrace. I cast a quick spell and suddenly we both forget all the things we’ve done together without the knowledge of our familiar bond, in their place we just remember joy.

“Dulcie Ryder,” I choke out. “I’ve missed you so much.

“Daddy,” she sobs. “I missed you too.”

I spread my wings and take my daughter’s hand, together we fly back to my home, to our home.