The Life of a generic Alicorn Princess

by Fillypans

Rating: teen
Tags: Main 6, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Trixie, Comedy, Royal Guard, Random, Discord, Princess Celestia
Length: 1948

The regular life of Princess Celestia...A tale of random things.

I was just your generic Alicorn, stand in your spot till your shift is over, then go to bed, only to bring the sun up and down again the next day, or look after the papers and meetings I had to attend to, or even send some random guards to the moon...Eyup...just a regular day for a princess...Just doing things to my gaurds...and going places....and trolling.

(Best read with the "Green on Black" layout. Will come helpful in later chapters.)

Edit: Reading ~ The Life Of A Generic Alicorn Princess: TheCaptainSand - Scarlett Blade

Published 2016-03-18 14:20:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-03-23 13:08:48 UTC

Mission 1: Gossip and Moon sending

As I walked down to my throne in the middle of my castle, I see the many royal guards ether standing by doors or possible by other things, I also see many other things, like when a new recruited guard was eating some of my cake when he was suppose to be watching over my fridge so Luna doesn't get into it, ah, those where the good old days. Now that I think about it...I think he's still on the moon! Note to self, get note cutie mark guard off of the moon. Duly noted. Now that i'm in my very comfy throne and at my desk. Which somehow got here from nowhere...I don't know, I start stacking papers and such...AAAAnd now I'm bored. I yell for a guard who was whispering something to another guard.

"HEY! Royal guard!"

He points at himself.

"Yes you! Come here for a minute!"

He walks over to my throne and sits and wait, quite the quite type, isn't he?

He questions why I brought him over, I say calmly,

"well, I thought you might want to switch with...um..."

I look around the room hastily,

"Oh! yah, um, you can have a VEEEERY special vacation!"

His face lit up slightly for once, well, that's a bit expected, I guess.

"But you need to tell me what you where gossiping about."

I gave him a "You'll-Go-To-The-Moon-If-You-Don't-Tell-Me-Now" Face. His face was now sweaty, and I can see he wants to make a run for it, but I wont allow that! He cleared his throat and he was trying his best to speak, oh, this is going to be juicy! I decided to play with him a bit more.

"...You know...Your not the only one who has secrets you know...I could...I don't know...Tell you one of Luna if you wanted, only if you tell me what you where gossiping about!"

I knew I got him right there, I may have lots of things to do, but I do pay attention to my guards sometimes, and this one, likes Luna a lot, I mean, he has pictures of her everywhere in his headquarters! Now let us see what he will do...

"..I..ugh..a-appreciate the exchange, p-princess, but I-I don't think..I..s-should...G- go now..."

As he runs off, I swear to myself...No matter what it takes, even if I have to give my cake, I will find out what is going on!

Author's Note

Let the hunt begin! I named the chapter "Mission 1: Gossip " because I want it so it's like Sunbutt is on an "Mission Impossible " kind of thing...

Trixie Wishes to see Trixie in this story! When will Trixie be in the story!?:trixieshiftright:

Don't worry Trixie! You'll be in here in no time at all!:scootangel:

NO TIME AT ALL?! SO TRIXIE WILL NOT BE IN THIS STORY?! YOU LIER!:flutterrage:

That's not-:ajbemused: oh whatever...Let's see what Sunbutt get's into next...:trollestia:

Mission 2: Forgetting and Twilight

"...So that's it, huh? Never knew-"

I walk passed two royal guards who are whispering something, they hide their faces and snicker, ugh...this is really starting to get on my nerves...and that's hard to do. I walk up to the two of them and ask,

"If I may ask a question? What are you two chatting about? Something about me, or my sister, or even a coup de tat?"

They gulp loudly and reply,

"Well...um....It's nothing like a rebellion, but I guess I can say-"

*RRRRRRIIIIIIIINNNNNGGGG!!!!!*

"Well, would you look at the time princess, it's lunch time! See you...*snicker* soon! Eh heh...ah..."

Drat, foiled again by the bell. another note to self, disable bell. Now where was I? ~Ahem, They dart too the lunch room as I go back to my throne...

Now how will I know the secret? UGH! This is sooooo getting on my nerves...ok Tia...Calm down...It's probably just a rumor...nothing more...I bet it'll pass by the next hour...Right?

***The Next Hour***

As I look around, I see that most of my guards are partying! I think I see one in the back on my throne, drinking catsup! Who does that?!

"OK! THIS IS GETTING OUT OF HA-I mean HOOF!!"

Almost all my guards are now ether staring at me with awe because I used my Canterlot voice, or that they are snickering at me. Probably both... I speak more softly this time,

"I ugh, mean, attention, all royal guards in the room! I am going right to the point! I want to know what you're all whispering about! The first pony to tell me get's a free, pre-paid, one day only, day as a prince or princess!"

They all stare at me and then get right back to snickering and gossiping....Damn, I thought the old Day-As-A-Princess/Prince Would Work...Oh well...Looks like I'll have to do this the hard way...

"ugh..fine...you all will get free caaah- caaahaaa-"

A royal guard, who's mouth was literally watering on my carpet, note to self, again, make sure this guard drowns in water. Anyways, he was watering on my carpet, licking he lips, he then said,

"D-do....you mean....-C-ca-cake?!"

Every single guard who heard that all ran up to my throne and sit down like dogs, including the one who said cake. Ugh, jeez, I think they're still talking, but now their saying cake over and over...

"Now, now, my little ponies...I will give you each a piece of my lovely MEGA-ULTRA-TRIPLE-COCO-PINKIE-SURPRISE-CAKE if even one of you tell me the secret you're all gossiping about!"

They all looked at each other for a little bit... I've got them where I want them...heh heh...Nopony can best the princess of the sun!

After a little bit, they....all cleared out....Me damnit....Hold on...there is one more! Yes!

"So..do you wish to answer my request? You'll get ALL the cake!" I say with a forced smile.

"But...I'm lactose intolerant..."

I frown so much I can see the fear in his eyes, I had to resist all my might from sending him to the moon....again.

"Get out of my sight..."

He runs right out the door, screaming to his mommy...Who keeps in putting these wimps for royal guards?! I'll have to send them to the moon later.

"Jeez...All these things I need to remember...Now who do I need to return to the moon? Oh yah, Twinkle toes cute mark now...let's-"

Just as I was going to finish my sentence, my star pupil, Twilight Sparkle jumps in...through...the...window...that's going to cost bits...Looks like i'm going to have to tap into Twilight's bit account...

"Celestia! It's bad! REALLY, REALLY BAD!"

I try my best to act like I want to see her here...

"Twilight! My faithful student! How can I help you?"

"Oh it's just terrible! Discord has-"

Just as she was about to finish, I put one of my hooves up to stop her. Ugh, I don't have time to deal with this...

"I see...Don't worry! I'm sure you and the other elements can handle him!"

"I- You really mean that?"

"I trust you, really, my student. Now go! You must defend....ugh..what's the place?"

oh, for the love of me, how did I forget the name of that place?! I mean, I've been there and back over a span of over a million years!

"Ponyville..."

"Yes, yes, Ponyville..Go now! I Really don't believe in you!"

With a confident look, she darts off....through another window....Well, looks like you're going to be broke by the end of this, my star pupil!"

Mission 3: Chaos and Cake

"Mm! I love the wind riding in my mane like this! You should try it coronal Buttface!"

As my mane rides in the wind I speak to "Coronal Buttface" who, has my cutie mark on his face, so I call him Buttface! Ever since the Zebra barbarian pony war, he's been having that on his face ever since, oh, how we laughed!

"If you will excuse my rudeness, princess...But don't call me "Buttface" ever again, you keep saying it and it's getting on my nerves..."

"Oh, come on! You sound (snicker) so cute (snicker) with that name! heh ah..."

I try my best to hold it in, oh, good thing we are here at...hm...let's see....Cakeville? Hm. Good one Discord...Well played!

"Land here."

"But princess, this is where Discord would-"

I give him a stern look and he immediately shuts up! Holy me! Thank you Fluttershy!

"Did I COMMAND you to speak? No, I don't recall, so shut it!"

He mumbles something I can't hear, ohh....I forgot he has one of the softest voices in Equestria...

"Ah! If it isn't my partner in crime, Celestia! OH! I'm sooo glad you could come to my Birthday party!"

Buttface and I looked on, to see Discord head to...hooves with chocolate cake...wow, that cake looks good...

"Discord? It really is YOUR birthday?"

"Well, ya see princess, pinkie pie here saw that Discord hasn't ever had a B-day, so she threw im' a birthday party...She asked what the hey he would like as a present, and ah'm sure you know where i'm goin' with this..."

I stare at Discord, who now for some reason was sitting in a foot stool, with a mini Applejack on his "hand" and was imitating Applejack's words. I snickered at that, he was about to burst as well, he then shoved it away behind him every time AJ would look at him.

"So I wanted a giant cake the size of Ponyville, chaotic style...Good thing Pinkie over here knows what I like!"

He pulls Pinkie from off screen and puts her in a hug....(What? Have a problem that I broke the 4th wall? It's my telling, so I make up the rules! Trollestia 1, Story Creator 0!)

"Well...um...*ahem* anyways...Happy birthday Discord?"

He pulls ME into a hug out of nowhere, and says,

"Thank you thank you! Oh! I've never had a birthday party with sooo many friends! and you too writer! Thank you for making this! I promise to repay you!"

Oh, great, I forgot Discord has the 4th wall break ability as well...

He's NOT the only one!

Oh, look who joined the cross-dimensional party!

Will you two PLEASE get off this thred?! THIS IS MY STORY!

Fine...You're such a party pooper, Celestia...

Yah...What he said...

Anyways...Back to the Equestrian world...

"Yes....so how about some cake, Discord?"

"I would love to share with my friends..of course you can have some!"

Discord, out of nowhere....again, proofed us 8 a plate and some cake, mine with extra frosting, of course. Everypony besides Twilight start eating their cake.

"Are you alright, Twilight? I know this isn't how a REAL party goes, but Discord likes his B-days his way...You get used to it after a million years..."

"Well...I guess you're right...I just need to let him have his way...I guess...."

"Hey, what are we whispering about?"

Suddenly, Discord was in between our conversation...Somepony please remind me to send him to the SUN later...

"Well...does anypony want ice cream?"

***Somewhere Someplace***

"And that's how TRIXIE defeated the two legged beast!"

"GET OUTA HERE!"

"BOO!"

"BOO! YOU STINK!"

"Well, at least Trixie can do REAL magic tricks! Unlike all of you talent-less ponies!"

The crowd roared with anger, throwing tomatoes and hey fries at the fake display of magic.

"Fine then, Trixie will find magic herself and DESTROY you all! Worthless, Trixie says!"

Trixie ran off her stage...to where we do not know....

Author's Note

Well, Trixie? Did you get your wish? I hope so!:twilightsheepish:

Hmm...Fine, Trixie will take the role of the bad mare...Since Trixie is good at that...:trixieshiftleft:

Well, at least you didn't get paired with Discord...THAT would be a disaster...:derpyderp2:

You don't say...heh heh heh...:trixieshiftright: