The F&#% Machine 5000

The snorting can be heard from the ground, as if he is seeking attention. The tree rocks back and forth with each stroke, the animal bringing himself closer and closer to the edge.

"Harry! What the hell are you doing up there?!" Fluttershy's angry voice blasting through the limbs of the tree.

The bear jumps in surprise and falls down the tree hitting every branch on the way down before face planting the ground. He rolls over on his back, staring upwards at Twilight's castle and where he was previously sitting.

Fluttershy gets in his face. "I'm not good enough for you, Harry?! You got to go and watch Twilight and Rainbow get pounded because I'm not good enough?!"

Fluttershy grabs the bear by the ear and begins dragging him back to the cottage. "When we get home, guess what you're sucking?!" The bear gulps in fear and Fluttershy yells, "MY BALLS!"