Much Aboob About Nothing

by Kifstopher

Rating: mature
Tags: Sweetie Belle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Mystery, Rarity, Fluttershy, Random, Slice of Life
Length: 1506

Rainbow Dash is determined for Rarity to see Fluttershy's giant breasts. The only issue is that Fluttershy does not have any giant breasts.

Rainbow Dash is absolutely sure that Fluttershy has the biggest breasts in Ponyville. They're huge, massive, bigger than her head, even! How could they not be the biggest? It was absolutely impossible.

Unfortunately, Rarity doesn't see it. Or rather, doesn't see them.

Published 2016-02-17 05:20:03 UTC
Last updated 2016-02-17 05:20:03 UTC

Without

It was a quiet, cool night in the Carousel Boutique. The lights were on low, and the only noises were coming from Rarity's little humming as she arranged some outfits for tomorrow's customers. Gently placing dresses and suits on the ponnequins just so as for them to look their best, she busied herself as time passed.

Around seven, when she had started fixing minor details, she heard a knock at the door, her ears perking up. Placing her work on hold, she went over and answered the knocker, opening the door.

"Hello?" she asked, then saw who it was. "Oh, hello Rainbow Dash."

"Rarity!" Rainbow Dash greeted loudly from outside, "Hey, nice to see ya!" She invited herself in, as well as dragging in Fluttershy, who was less than excited to be brought along by the hoof. "How long has it been since I visited, huh?" Dash asked, smiling and looking around with obviously fake interest.

"Not too long, you were here yesterday, remember?" Rarity asked, staring weirdly at her friend. "Also, hello, Fluttershy," she added, hastily. Fluttershy made a very quiet greeting in response, raising her hoof. Rarity smiled at her. "Now, what-"

"Alright, Rarity, down to business!" Rainbow Dash said abruptly, turning around on a dime and pointing her hoof at Rarity, her whole body leaning into it.

"I, er, okay?" Rarity replied, blinking, "...What do you mean?

"What I mean is Fluttershy!" She replied, turning her extreme point towards the yellow pony standing there.

"...What about her?"

"Take a good look at her, Rarity!" Dash demanded, making a big grin. "Really soak it in!"

Rarity turned towards Fluttershy, who gave a weak smile. She looked fairly tired and a bit sweaty, her coat being lightly covered with dust. Rarity offered her a seat on the couch, but Fluttershy declined with a wave of her hoof and a quick shake of her head.

"Yeah, that's certainly Fluttershy..." Rarity murmured, looking away from Rainbow Dash as she talked.

Rainbow Dash suddenly ran up and wrapped her foreleg around her shoulder. "And I know what you're thinking!" She shouted, confidently. "You're thinking, 'Man, that girl's got some huge tits!' Am I right or am I right?"

Rarity looked to Rainbow Dash, then to Fluttershy, then back to Dash, then back to Fluttershy. What was clearly obvious looking at the yellow pegasus was that she absolutely did not have huge tits. Or any tits, for that matter. Fluttershy was flat in her nether regions.

"Uh, darling?" Rarity said, slowly, "Is there something I'm missing here?"

Rainbow Dash looked at her like Rarity had lost her mind. "Are you blind? Look at them! Those boobs are bigger than her head!"

Slowly scooting out of her arm's reach, Rarity gave a polite smile towards Rainbow Dash. "I don't mean to be rude, dearie, but..." she began, "but Fluttershy clearly does not have any breasts." She hastily added, facing Fluttershy, "Not that there's anything wrong with that, darling, you're plenty beautiful without breasts."

Fluttershy gave a meek blush.

Rainbow Dash's face contorted, looking deranged at this horrible, impossible revelation. "Rarity, are you blind!? Look at those tits!" She yelled, throwing her hooves out at the pegasus, "I want to press my face into them and just go ptbtbtbtb!" This point was accentuated by her sticking her tongue out and shaking her head from side to side rapidly.

Deciding to ignore Rainbow Dash's interesting display, as well as the spit she was leaving on the carpet, she put a hoof on her shoulder. "Darling, please tell me what you're doing, because I have no clue what you're getting at here."

"I'm talking about Fluttershy's tits!" Dash yelled, throwing Rarity's hoof off, "She's got the biggest in Ponyville, but nopony seems to realize that!"

There was a silence in the room for a minute, broken only by Rainbow Dash's huffing noises. Fluttershy shuffled her hooves around on the carpet, while Rarity's expression slowly became more and more confused.

"Er..." Rarity started, but had no idea what to say. There were very few words in the dictionary that could aid her in this situation, and even then, they probably would not help much. "I, erm..."

"What's going on?" a squeaky voice called from upstairs.

Rarity turned her head and watched Sweetie Belle slowly descend the stairs. "Oh, Sweetie Belle, darling, I'm sorry," she said, walking towards her sister, "were we making too much noise?"

"No, I just wanted to know what was going on!" Sweetie Belle said, gingerly going down another step, her two massive breasts swinging from side to side with her movement, straining the poor filly as she waddled.

"Do you need help, Sweetie?" Rarity asked, climbing up a few steps, "I can help you hold them." She lit her horn and, using her magic, began to hold up Sweetie Belle's massive breasts, each one twice the size of a beach ball, and helped carry them down the stairs and a few feet across the room.

Sweetie Belle smiled and sat down on the couch, her massive breasts coming up to her chin, and she leaned forward onto them, sighing. "Thanks, sis," she grinned.

"Can we get back to the topic and hand?" Rainbow Dash said, impatiently tapping her hoof, "How can you not see that Fluttershy has the biggest boobs in all of Ponyville?! They're like, right there in front of you!"

"Dashie, I really don't know what you're playing at here, but it's simply not making any sense," Rarity said, turning away from her sister. "Pretty much everypony in Ponyville has larger breasts than Fluttershy. I mean, even yours are bigger than hers!" She pointed towards Rainbow Dash's small-but-noticable breasts, and shook her head. "Not that there's anything wrong with that!" she hastily added again to Fluttershy.

Sweetie Belle had turned to listen, but didn't like Rainbow Dash's yelling, so she turned away again. Quietly, she patted her breasts to a little rhythm.

"No, no, no, no, no!" Rainbow Dash screamed, swinging her fists up and down, "She has the biggest tits and I know it!" She began to stomp on the floor like a little baby throwing a temper tantrum. "They're like giant pillows! How can you not see it?!"

"Dashie, perhaps we should move onto another topic," Rarity said, frowning, "I don't want you screaming about anypony's breasts around Sweetie Belle. It's inappropriate."

Sweetie, meanwhile, and turned and laid her head down on top of her mountainous breasts, and was practicing her magic by lazily levitating a pillow in front of her. She wasn't really paying attention to the conversation.

"I don't care!" Dash wailed, "You need to stop being a prude and see her huge boobs, Rarity!" Suddenly, she ran up and grabbed Rarity and yanked her over to Fluttershy, shoving her face into Fluttershy's lower regions, knocking the poor pegasus onto her back. "See?! See?!"

Rarity pushed herself up, throwing Rainbow Dash off comically easily, and stood fully with a fairly upset look on her face. "Rainbow Dash, get out!" She yelled, pointing at the door.

"Ha! Look at that blush!" Rainbow Dash sneered, "You knew I was right all along, huh?!"

"Out! Out, out, out!" Rarity demanded, then proceeded to grab Rainbow Dash and shove her out the door, slamming it after she was outside.

There was a bit of calm in the air after that. Fluttershy sat on the floor, mindlessly drawing little circles in the carpet and not accomplishing anything of worth. Sweetie Belle was unhappy, her ears at the side of her head, cowering on the couch. Rarity, meanwhile, fumed at the door, taking deep breaths and trying to calm herself down.

Eventually, Sweetie Belle worked up the nerve and squeaked, "Sis? Are you okay?"

Rarity turned to her, and sighed. "Yes, darling. I'm sorry I blew up there," she said, trotting towards her sister, "I'm going to be alright."

"Um..." Fluttershy murmured, meekly.

"Oh, dearie... You should probably go home," Rarity said, blushing and looking away. Quietly, she opened the door, where Rainbow Dash had apparently ran off, and let Fluttershy out, giving her a little wave.

Sweetie Belle patted her massive breasts as she waited. "Um... What happened?"

"It's nothing, Sweetie, Rainbow Dash just decided to go insane, I suppose."

"Is she going to be okay?"

"I don't know," Rarity said. She sat down next to Sweetie Belle and wrapped an arm around her. "It's fine, though. You don't need to worry about anything, Sweetie."

As she hugged her sister, she began to wonder why Rainbow Dash had acted like that. Maybe she was overworked, but Rarity wasn't even sure if she even had a job, let alone one that would exhaust her like that. Weirder, though, was why she had become obsessed with Fluttershy's breasts when she has never had any. Really, Rarity didn't know that anypony in Ponyville had giant breasts, so where did she even get the idea from?

As she stroked Sweetie Belle's hair with her hoof, she sighed.

It was a mystery.