Chapter 1: Emotional Suffering And Flashbacks
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Until Death Gives Us Further Notice
Chapter 1: Emotional Suffering And Flashbacks
Walking through the hospital doors was the hardest thing Rainbow Dash had ever done in her life. She remembered coping with being in the same room of her bullies, picked and teased on and not running away in tears but this, just the fact that the doctors were saying she 'might have it, made her tremble like a dog in a new house. Of course, she didn't have a dog, she had a tortoise and due to being a Pegasi up in the clouds for the majority of her life, dogs were like a mythical creature to her. However, through stories, she remembered AppleJack telling how they first got Wynonna which upon hearing it, made Rainbow laugh her head off. Although it was a funny story, it did not lighten the atmosphere she was currently held in.
As the mare walked down the corridor, she noticed posters on the wall describing a certain illness, one which she might already have. Most of them were just in case an accident happened like, 'Has it gotten worse? Get a appointment with your doctor immediately' . They were all so direct that it was like they weren't even bothered if you got it or even passed away from it. But one stood out from the rest, making the Pegasus cringe from seeing it...
'If you've got cancer, book regular appointments with a cancer therapist to help you cope.'
You see, Rainbow Dash has been warned that she might have cancer and today, she is here to get her results. Sweat was pouring down her whole body as she began to get closer to the waiting room. How could she be afraid? The brash, 'awesome' Rainbow Dash wasn't afraid of a manticore, a dragon or even Nightmare Moon but getting cancer, was like a whole new nightmare to her.
If she got it, she might not be able to join the Wounderbolts which she knew from reading a copy of their rule book. She would also have to be constantly supervised and would have to go to the hospital more frequently which was like 'living in Tartarus itself' as she would say it. If it wasn't for her grandfather, maybe the Pegasus wouldn't have been so afraid as she was now. She remembered how all the times she met him, he was in a hospital bed, bald, sick looking and hardly talked. She didn't want to end up like he was; like a old rag doll sitting on a shelf awaiting the day it would be played with again.
A tear rolled down her left eye as she began to think of her fate, "I...I..." She stuttered as she stopped in her tracks, unable to move any further. Before she protested more, a wing draped over her back, giving her small comfort through this hell she was going through. The rainbow manned mare turned her head to see a set of purple eyes locking with hers, showing both worry and comfort. A small smile crept on the lavender alicorns face, making her worries feel like it was just a dream. But of course, it wasn't. She returned the smile before returning her gaze to the tiled floor when she was suddenly embraced in a hug by four other mares.
She didn't have to know who these ponies who hugged her were, as she already knew. They were her friends, her best friends. Up to this day, they've done almost everything together; gone on adventures, fought villains and even have become celebrities to the public. In this moment of the embrace, Rainbow Dash thought of all the moments they went through; How they transformed Nightmare Moon to Princess Luna, defeating and reforming Discord, getting rainbow powers and banishing Tirek to Tartarus again; life was good until a few days ago. Once the embrace ended, the Pegasus suddenly felt empty in a way, like somepony or someone had token out one of the puzzle pieces out of the box so when it was all put together again, it would never be complete. But something remained on her back; a large purple wing. The comfort coming from the it was the only thing the mare could wish for at the moment; making all the sadness and pain slip away for a moment.
They suddenly entered the waiting room and it didn't help Rainbow Dash one bit; it just reminded her further of why she was here. White coated all of the walls and the only main colour showing was the green on the seats. She walked to the corner of the room and sat down, constantly looking at the floor which was beneath her. The rest of her friends followed her steps and sat down, signalling she's not alone. But something was missing; she felt like a ton of weight was lifted off of her. She looked to her back and noticed there was no wing put over her. Frantically looking around, she noticed the Alicorn at the far side of the room talking to a white earth pony with a light pink mane. "Okay, thank you Nurse Redheart" she heard her say before walking towards her direction. The Princess sat next to her heartbroken friend and put her wing over the Pegasus again, returning the warmth that was lost just a moment ago.
At the corner of her eye, Rarity noticed a pink tail drag itself out of sight. She turned her attention to her friends when she noticed that the butter coated mare which was there moments ago had vanished. "Ermm... if I could just be excused for a moment to nip the mares room" the white unicorn said, seeing multiple nods from the others. She got up from the seat she sat down in and turned the corner where she saw a weeping Pegasus on the floor. She immediately ran down the corridor and curled the pink manned mare in her hooves, "Shh... it's okay...It's okay" she spoke, hearing the whimper slightly seize.
Feeling the Pegasus below her calm down a bit, she began to comfort her, "Darling, why are you crying?" Of course she knew why her friend was crying, she was just helping her.
The Pegasus began to sniffle and removed herself from the embrace of her friend, "It's just...just what happens if she does have it Rarity? She's hasn't been the same since she was told she might have it and if she does..." she quietly spoke, biting her bottom lip, noticed by the white unicorn besides her.
"Listen darling, I know how it feels, we all do, but we've got to be strong for her" she responded, feeling tears well up in her eyes, "I know you two are like sisters but we need you to be with her Fluttershy... if we're all not there, who knows how bad she'll take it."
"O-Okay" Fluttershy said in a tone quieter than she had ever spoke. She lifted her trembling body up and began to walk back to the waiting room when what both of them saw, made their hearts shatter. On the seat was a curled up Rainbow Dash, crying in her front hooves. The rest of their friends turned to their direction with sad looks on their faces.
Fluttershy had never been more nervous in her life as she sat next to her broken friend who didn't look up once to see who approached her, "Shhh... Rainbow it's going to be okay, it's probably just the feather flu", but it didn't help the crying Pegasus one bit. She turned her direction towards the unicorn who was encouraging her to keep speaking, "Don't worry Rain-" the butter coated mare spoke again when she was cut of by a tan coloured stallion walking in, levitating a clipboard in front of his face.
"Mrs Rainbow Dash, if you would like to follow me please" he said before turning towards his room, "Oh and if you want to bring a friend with you, that's absolutely fine."
The cyan mare got up from her seat and began to slowly walk to the room when she suddenly turned her head towards her friends who gave her small smiles. She glanced at all of them before beginning to speak, "Flutt-Fluttershy if it's o-okay with you-" she was about to finish her sentence when a Butter coated Pegasus rushed to her side, putting her wing over her. It felt slightly smaller than Twilight's wing but it was all the comfort she needed at the moment. The cyan Pegasus gave a small smile before walking though the door.
It was a lot different from the corridors. Brown coated the walls with multiple certificates hanging off of it. In the middle, a desk was filled with photos of foals and a mare the similar age to the doctor in the room. They were neatly organised, leaving a gap in the middle so that the patients could see clearly who they were talking to. Two black chairs were placed opposite the doctors, awaiting the mares to sit down. Rainbow gave Fluttershy one last look before sitting down, the wing gripping on her every step of the way.
"So Rainbow Dash, how's your wing" the doctor asked, attempting to lighten the mood.
She first looked at him with a raised eyebrow but then responded in a harsh tone which would intimidate Nightmare Moon herself, "Fine, can you just tell me the results doc. I didn't come here for a conversation".
"O-Okay" Doctor Stable said before looking at the paper in front of him, "Well Mrs Dash, the test results show..."
A few days earlier
Mornings were always a pain for the sleeping Pegasus who was lunged on the bed, no care in the world for how she looked. But why should she bother? No one was living with her and the pony of her dreams is currently on the ground, probably dreaming about talking to the sun goddess or something like that. Today seemed different though. Yea, living in a town which had seemingly been attacked three times in the last two years by vicious beasts was a type of 'different' but this was somewhat a unusual type of different, one which could only be sensed with the mind.
No sun beamed through her window, No birds chirped in the air and no wind rustled her mane and coat; the three elements which made up her alarm clock. But why? Obviously it annoyed her every morning, waking her up an hour earlier than she wanted to when it just took her a few minutes to get ready for work.
Oddly, life seemed to enjoy seeing her groan each day in frustration as she forced her self down stairs and slowly ate breakfast. But hey, at least she got constant naps. But today, with none of those things waking her up, a small part of her seemed to worry for some reason, like some pony inside her was screaming in her head about something bad happening. But the rest of her, well, she took it as a blessing. With a smile plastered on her face, she reached for the covers with her hooves and tucked all of her body in, snuggling to the soft cloud bed which she spent the majority of her life in.
An hour had passed as the mare in the sheets still slept; her chest constantly rising and deflating at a steady rate. She gradually opened her eyes and was face to face with pictures of her and her friends. As she let a smile show, she turned her direction towards the window where she saw daylight stroke the edges of the panel and once she realised what time it was from the position of the sun, her eyes shot open. "Oh my Celestia! I'm late" she shouted, wiggling out of the bed sheets and galloping downstairs and towards the door. 'No time for breakfast, no time to shower... Gah! I should have got up an hour ago' the cyan Pegasus thought as she was about to reach the door and fly off.
Before she reached the handle though, she looked at her reflection to make sure she's properly 'well kept' for work. As she straightened her mane out, she noticed a lump on her neck, a lump which had been on her for a while. Of course there was nothing to worry about, she was Rainbow Dash, the fastest flier throughout all of Equestria; it was probably just a cyst or something like that. And with that, she rushed out of the door and flew to work, leaving a rainbow trail behind her.
XXX
Weather duties were a pain
Not hanging around her friends was a pain
So far, everything was a pain
The cyan Pegasus was having the worst day of her life so far. First off, every pony on her weather team seemed to be off because of the 'feather flu' therefore making her do all of the work herself. Oh, how was she going to punish them all once they got back? Maybe five hundreds wing ups will satisfy her frustration? Nah, make it a thousand. But there was one pony who arrived though sadly, she was one of the most clumsy, unexperienced Pegasi; and her name was Derpy. The only real reason she kept the grey mare on the team was to help her pay for her child, Dinky or otherwise, she would have fired her a year back. Second off, it seemed that the weather factory had 'misplaced' the shipment order, leaving them with thirty less clouds than what was needed.
"What do we do boss?" the clumsy mare said, jumping on a white cloud while making water droplets hit the floor beneath.
She looked into her golden eyes, thinking of a easier solution to this situation. But there wasn't any. Yea, they could create a storm all over Ponyville with ten less clouds but not thirty so she had to do this, "Okay Derpy, you keep guard of this shipment while I go to the weather factory and get the rest" and with that, she flew towards the sky knowing full well she'll have a rampage with the weather officer.
XXX
"What do you mean your sorry! Now because of your 'mistake' as well as my companions being off because of the feather flu, I'm going to be working later than expected" she yelled throughout the halls, her raspy voice echoing throughout every room. In front of her, was a purple Pegasus with a curly pink mane, her cutie mark adoring three raindrops.
"I'm sorry" she hesitantly said, slowly walking into a corner on the urge of crying, "We forgot to put all the shipment together before it was delivered and we didn't know about it until you came here now."
The way the pink manned pony spoke made Rainbow Dash feel like she was speaking to Fluttershy, which no matter how much the butter coated Pegasus messed up, she would never yell at her like this. She took a deep breath and began to speak in her normal toned voice, "Listen, I'm sorry for yelling at you like that. I'm just stressed and tired and I want to get this finished before meeting with my friends later. Would you mind getting the rest for me so I can be on my way?" A simple nod from the pony in front of her was all she needed to see before she galloped off out of her sight.
Luckily, it didn't take that long as she began to fly back to Ponyville, with a crate of clouds floating behind her. Once she got back she noticed Derpy, sitting by the rest of the shipment with a muffin in her hooves, "Okay I'm back, lets get started then" Rainbow Dash said, passing the clouds to Derpy and directing her where to place them. Today, Derpy seemed to be better than her earlier experiences with her. For one, she hadn't done anything clumsy yet which was a relief towards her as it would mean that she would have to 'fix the town' like her and her team normally did and secondly, she was actually working quite fast. Maybe Derpy just doesn't like to work with other ponies.
As she began to pass the tenth cloud to the grey coloured mare she suddenly felt dizzy. The world began to spin around her, making her feel like she was on a carnival ride. The blonde manned Pegasus noticed this, holding the mare in place before speaking, "Err...boss are you okay, you don't look so good."
She shook her head from left to right and put a hoof towards her forehead, "Yea, just *yawn tired you know" and knowing Derpy, she'll put off the conversation immediately and go back to work which she did.
Finally, after hours of cloud placing, it was finally finished. Wiping the sweat from her head with her left hoof, she turned around and faced a smiling grey mare who seemingly didn't destroy anything today. She bided her farewell and flew off towards the friendship castle, thinking about giving the grey Pegasus a raise for today. "Woohoo" she shouted as she flew through the air, wind brushing against her coat while doing spins throughout the journey. As she got closer to the castle, she notice five figures talking in a circle and recognised them instantly; they were her friends, the rest of the elements of harmony and of course, part of her family in a way.
Wind rushed passed the five silhouettes as the cyan mare landed on the ground, smiling freely, "Hey guys, what's up?" she said before being tackled onto the floor by a pink blur.
"OH DASHIE I'M SUPER DUPER HAPPY NOW THAT YOUR HERE! I WAS BEGINNING TO WORRY THAT YOU WOULDEN'T COME BUT THEN YOU WERE LIKE SWOOSH AND YOUR HERE NOW AND YOU BIRTHDAYS IN A FEW DAYS AND AND-" the pink earth pony said before a magical aura surrounded her, moving her off the struggling Pegasus below so that she could breath.
The rainbow manned mare got up from where she was tackled and wiped the dust off her hooves, "Uhh thanks Twi" she sheepishly said before being hugged again, but not by Pinkie. Purple hooves wrapped around her neck with a purple head nuzzling the side of her cheek.
"Oh Dash, I'm so glad you could make it, I was so worried about you when you didn't show up" Twilight said, tightening her grip around the Pegasus like she was some sort of teddy bear.
With her mouth gaped open, she looked towards the rest of her friends who seemed to be giving her the 'aww' look like she was in some sort of relationship with Twilight. 'Well... This is weird' she thought before cutting her thoughts off, a blush forming on her face, "Twi, I think we should go inside, don't you agree" Rainbow said while still wrapped in the hooves of the Alicorn. With that said, Twilight let go and blushed furiously, rushing into the castle doors and into the throne room.
Rainbow Dash trotted up to the rest of her friends, all of them giving puzzled looks towards the mares 'outbreak' before shrugging it off and trotting up to the chairs which had their cutie marks on and sat down. For the next hour, the six mares talked about random subjects, how their day went, jokes, even just remembering times they spent together, oh how Rainbow Dash loved hanging around with her friends. But shortly after Applejack talked about her day on the farm, she began to feel queasy. The world spun around her, noticed by the orange farm pony next to her, "Sugarcube, are you alright" She asked, getting the attention of the other four mares who were in conversations of their own.
"I d-don't feel s-so g-good" she stuttered before collapsing on the floor, blanking out in the process. Her friends rushed to her side, calling her name but she didn't respond.
"What happened to her" Fluttershy said shyly, kneeling down towards her and feeling her forehead with her hoof. A purple aura surrounded the unconscious Pegasus, levitating her into the air and onto the purple mares back.
"I don't know Fluttershy, but we need to get to the hospital, c'mon girls" she said, all of them running as fast as possible.
XXX
Beep Beep Beep
The sound echoed throughout the room as the passed out Pegasus began to stir. 'That sound' she thought as the beeping continued at a steady pace. She could feel a needle pushed into her skin on her left hoof. She shouldn't be here, she should be in the castle, laughing at pinkies joke, eating pancakes to her hearts desire but instead she was lying in an unknown bed, not exactly sure of where she was.
Her eyes shot open, only to be blinded by a white light. She clenched her eyes shut, regretting what she had just done and re-opened them slowly only to be greeted with a white wall. She turned her head left and right only to be faced with more white walls as well as medical equipment. 'medical equipment' she thought. She was in the hospital... But why?
"Any pony there?" she asked to the lifeless air surrounding her, hoping to get some answers. She was about to call out again, when the door swung open to reveal a white earth mare with a pink mane, "thank Celestia! Nurse Redheart, can you tell me why I'm in the hospital" she said with a smile on her face but then turned to a frown when seeing a sympathetic look on the nurse's face, "What's wrong?" the Pegasus asked, showing worry and concern on her muzzle.
"Ms Rainbow Dash, I'm so sorry to tell you this but the lump on your neck we found and the symptoms you've been having...mainly the faint you just experienced might mean you have...Cancer" Nurse Redheart said, turning her head around and looking away from the Pegasus who laid stiff on the bed in urge of tears; knowing full well of was the Pegasus mind is going through.
'Cancer. No no no no. I can't get cancer, it's me Rainbow Dash. I can't get cancer, I don't want to die' she thought, still gazing at the white earth mare who was in front of the door. She broke out of her trance and began to speak, her raspy voice stuttering throughout, "Is it... Is it okay if I can go now" the cyan mare said, a tear sliding down her muzzle as she spoke. Once she saw a slow nod from the white earth pony, she slowly got up, removed the needle from her hoof and walked towards the door when something firm yet gentle tapped her shoulder, making her turn around and face a set of blue eyes.
"Don't worry that much. After all, we said you might have it. We'll send you a letter to inform you when we've got the results back" Nurse Redheart softly said, making the Pegasus smile a bit. After she nodded to the nurse and made her way to the waiting room, she noticed five mares, huddled together with sad looks on their faces. Could she tell them? They would find out sooner or later so she might as well get it over with. "Hey guys" she weekly said, getting the attention from them all. They rushed to her side, all of them embracing in a group hug.
"Sugarcube what did they say?" Applejack asked, regretting it once the Pegasus started crying. She wrapped her orange hooves around her to ease the unknown emotional pain Rainbow was going through, "Shh... It's okay... It's okay" she softly spoke, easing the cyan mares cries, "Ya don't have to tell us if ya don't want to."
"N-no it's o-okay I need to tell you. The doctors...they s-said I might have...have...Cancer" she replied before collapsing in Applejacks fur once again in tears. The rest of the group were all in shock, their hooves trembling as they galloped towards her, joining in her cries of pain. They all stayed at the castle the same day, hardly saying a word to each other as they all had different emotions towards this memory which replayed in their heads over and over again. three cried over the fact that their friend might have this 'disease', one cried over their past friendship and one cried over the love of her life emotionally broken.
XXX
Days went by and the prism manned mare hardly spoke to anypony, including her friends. Even though the nurse didn't entirely say that she had cancer, she already lost hope. if her brain had worried weeks ago when the lump appeared, maybe she could of ended it before it started. But instead, she thought that the awesome Pegasus she is, or was could never get that disease because she's 'too cool' for that.
As she laid in her bed, a few sniffles escaping her mouth, she heard her post box open and shut outside her house which was either two things in the Pegasus's head. One... the Wounderbolts heard about her might having cancer and have already removed her from the academy or two...The appointment letter from the hospital. As she slowly made her way towards her door, she stopped and looked into the mirror; the same mirror she looked in every morning and frowned, a tear rolling down her face.
She opened the door and let the air once again rush through her coat. She didn't really know why she was so scared of receiving one small piece of paper after all, it wasn't a manticore, it wasn't a dragon it even wasn't Flutterbat but she felt like her hooves were jelly, like her whole body was glued on the spot. No! She had to do this so she walked towards to box she used to run to each mourning and slowly breathed in. She pushed it open and saw a one letter, alone in the mailbox. Was that how she was going to live the rest of her life, alone? She pulled it out only to see her name and address with a red cross on top of it. So one question was solved from her mind however, multiple others questions were also in her mind making her worry even more. She ripped it open and read the details, only for it to be flown on the floor while she flew around the town, informing her friends about her appointment and of course, they followed her.
And that leaves us to the moment Rainbow goes and finds out her results. But the question is... Will she get it?
Author's Note
Re-uploaded because I think it needed an expansion. And hey, I went from 1,600 words to over 4,000... I give myself a pat on the back.
Anyway I'm searching for an editor. If you would be kind enough to do it or give me suggestions to people who edit fics like this, thanks.
Also, I need to know if you guys like this type of fic I'm doing. So if you do like it either vote up, favourite or even just comment that 'it was good' or something.
Thanks for reading. Take my Dashies!!!!!
