Twilight is a Zombie

by Michael Hudson

Rating: teen
Tags: Twilight Sparkle, Random, Romance, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Pinkie Pie
Length: 1500

Terror, panic, and facehooving ensues! Mainly from Rainbow Dash.

"Terror strikes Ponyville as an undead ruler roams the streets! Its shops and houses lay abandoned at her moaning hooves, and only one brave soul can save it! Will she have the heart though?"

"...Pinkie, shut up."

Written a couple weeks back, so none of my followers worry, please.

A rough comic rendition done by my patreon partner Knotted. Final will not be coming, as we have too much else to work on, so he provided the cover instead.

Published 2016-02-21 11:50:02 UTC
Last updated 2016-02-21 11:50:02 UTC

The horror, THE HORROR!

Rainbow blinked as she landed on the empty road. While Ponyville could be quiet, it was still the middle of the day, so for nopony to be there.... “Umm, hi?”

“Rainbow?” A pink, poofy mane came out of one of the nearby bushes, before the whole row rose with the pony. Pinkie soon ran over, her hooves being silent as they moved very little with each step, but were a blur with how fast they moved. “What are you doing?”

The blue pegasus raised an eyebrow at her now ten foot wide friend, at least, while in the costume. “Well, I was just running an errand for Twilight. Had to go pretty far for it even, and I was looking forward to-” She stopped talking as she felt Pinkie’s hooves around her neck. “Um, Pinkie, what are you-”

“Shh. It’s okay, you brave mare. Just remember the good times, and the pain will be softer.”

Rainbow turned her eyes to Pinkie, being a little creeped out at this point by the soft petting she was receiving. Only one mare was allowed to do something like that, and that was Twilight. “What are you talking about?”

Pinkie pushed away slightly from Rainbow, though the bush she wore still brushed against the blue mare’s chest. “Well, you see, while you were off on your errand, well,” Pinkie bit into her muzzle as she looked to the ground and pinned her ears. One twitched though, and then sprang back up, and she turned to the side, before her eyes opened wide. “Hit the building!”

“Hit the wha-” Before she could finish, Pinkie, as she seemed all too keen to do today, cut her off, by pulling the mare backwards. Both crashed against the building that Pinkie had been hiding against, and Rainbow found herself buried into one of the bushes. She looked to her now troublesome friend, and saw that she held a hoof over her mouth. That wasn’t going to work though to keep her quiet, not now at least. “That hurt you know.”

“Not as much as being eaten by your marefriend would.”

“What?” Rainbow was developing a headache at this point, and when Pinkie pointed away from the bush, it only got worse.

Barely plodding along was Twilight. It was admittedly, a little hard to tell, as she looked full on psycho mane with how ratty it was, though Rainbow chuckled at the squirrel that was sleeping in it. Beneath that were the low hanging eyebrows that normally got Rainbow to shiver, but instead, made the blue pegasus’s chest throb from the huge bags hanging from underneath. “Wow. She looks like a mess.”

Pinkie shook her head. “I wish she merely looked like that. If that were the case, a simple spa party would have been the cure, instead of whatever Rarity may find within the Canterlot archives. If she doesn’t find one though,” Pinkie brought out a long barreled rifle, and brought back the hammer, causing a few pieces of confetti to pop out of it, “I’ll have to take care of her myself.”

Rainbow slowly turned to her friend, her jaw hanging wide open at this point. Now, at this point, she was used to most of it. If Pinkie needed a seemingly random item, you gave it to her. If you needed something at a moment’s notice, no questions asked, she was your go to mare. Now though, she sounded like this was the end of the world, and all because Twilight looked like shit. “What is wrong with you?”

Pinkie turned on dime at her friend, and a thump could be heard as half the bushes attached to her swung outwards. “Can you not see?” She turned Rainbow’s head towards Twilight as the unicorn slowly brought herself back to her hooves, having been smacked across the street just a moment earlier. “Do you not see the red staining her muzzle, the hundred yard stare, or the moan that calls from beyond the grave? I even made this new stealth mode of twenty bushes tied together so that if she ever figured out my disguise, she would more likely hit nothing than I.”

Rainbow brought a hoof over her face and let out a long groan, the saddlebags on her sides feeling heavier as she tried to comprehend what was going on. “First, I thought it was a little weird that there bushes covering two different alleys, and secondly, do you really think Twilight is a…”

“Zombie.”

Rainbow blinked a few times, before slapping herself with her hoof again. “I would love this as a prank, seeing as it seems like you evacuated everypony with this,”

“I did.”

“But you’re being way too serious about all of this for that to be the case… right?”

Pinkie shook her head. “When it comes to my friends, I am only serious. Serious fun, serious parties, and serious zombie protection.”

“And what if I became a werewolf or something?”

“I would commence plan Serious Puppy Snuggles.”

Rainbow merely stared at her for that one for what felt like an eternity. She knew she had heard it, no doubt about that, but whether or not she believed it… “You know what, I’m gonna go and help my marefriend come back to us.”

Pinkie wanted to move forward, but had jeopardize her position enough, as she now blocked half the road with her costume, as Rainbow left the bushes, but she did still yell, “Rainbow, don’t do it!” To which, Rainbow merely rolled her eyes.

Coming over to Twilight, she was greeted by a familiar groan, and grinned at her nerd. “Come on. Nopony but Pinkie is around, so feel free to use your blue pillow.” She blushed at saying the stupid, tired, nickname, but it did get Twilight to start walking towards her. The pegasus could hear Pinkie screaming in the background, but ignored it as her tail swished behind her. She forgot how cute her sleepy princess could be.

Twilight surged forward at the last second, and Pinkie’s eyes widened in horror as she watched Rainbow fall to the ground with her. She rushed over in almost a second, but stopped as she heard Rainbow whispering to Twilight. “There we go. Snuggle in and get some rest. And hey, remind me next time to not let you research alone. You always forget to get some sleep.”

Pinkie blinked a few times as she looked between the two. “Umm, Rainbow, she isn’t eating you. Why?”

Rainbow rolled her eyes, the blush on her cheeks getting worse as her head was pulled back slightly by Twilight munching on her mane. “Because she’s tired. I needed to go get her some stupid plant for her experiment, and I was supposed to be back after a day, but the weather was bad and I took a few more to get here. This dummy,” she said as she batted Twilight on the head, “never looked at a clock while I was gone probably, and tried running an errand brain dead. I bet even now she is thinking of getting it done, even while nopony is in town.”

Pinkie’s head continued to tilt, now almost upside down as she got more confused. “But the blood.”

“Probably ketchup from the Hayburger I got her before I left so she didn’t starve or something. Again, she is an idiot while researching without me.” Rainbow then smiled as she reached back and gently pet Twilight. “Of course, she’s my idiot, but that’s besides the point.”

Pinkie nodded a few more times, before falling over. Rainbow almost stood up at the sight, but stopped as he heard the party mare breathe out a long sigh. “Umm, you okay?”

“I have a lot I need to do now. And I thought I had a lot while trying to do an evacuation in an hour.” Pinkie groaned as she put her head onto her hooves. “They’re gonna be mad.”

Rainbow patted Pinkie’s shoulder, before grinning at her. “Well, I could use some rest myself, and, well, I don’t think Twi is going anywhere soon, and I don’t really want to be seen like this.” Just to seemingly emphasize why, Twilight clambered up higher onto Rainbow Dash, and began nomming at more hair as the pegasus was given a sleeping hug. “So, especially with that groan of yours, wanna copy this zombie and sleep like the dead?”

Pinkie giggled, but instead of snuggling against the other two mares, jumped back into her bushes to fall asleep. Rainbow smiled at the gesture, and silently thanked the other mare as she turned to her beloved and nuzzled into Twilight’s muzzle. Looking at those shut eyes and twitching hooves, she couldn’t help but feel warm inside. “I should leave you to yourself more often. You’re way too cute when I come back.”

The only response Twilight gave was a small moan as she continued to munch on Rainbow’s hair, and smiled.