I sat on my bed, mind and body completely numb. From the gaps in the window, thin streams of light slithered into my dark domain, showing the bright world hiding beyond. The thought brought an empty smile to my lips.

Looks like a pretty good day. I thought, turning my back to the invading strings of light. That's good. Now I can leave without any regrets.

Lazily, I looked down at the two pills resting in my left hand. It was funny in a cosmic sort of way; something so harmless and plain looking could end someone's life. That was probably what made it so difficult to get my hands on it. Honestly, with all the hoops I had to jump through, you'd think I was planing to kill someone with them.

A hallow chuckle slipped passed my lips as that ironic thought crossed my mind.

Oh. That's right.

Sitting on the floor to my right was a bottle of apple flavored ale, just a little something to wash down the taste of death after I do my species a favor. With dead eyes, I picked up the half empty bottle, memories of what pushed me to this point. All of the hate, the misery, the loneliness, all of it forming into a deep ocean of tar, drowning my soul. At first, it was bearable, I had a tether to draw me back into the light when I felt myself drowning, but eventually, even that was severed and all I could do was wade it out as I sunk deeper into the darkness, taking what few gasps of breath I could. A man can only endure that for so long.

Almost mechanically, I gently placed the cyanide tablets in my mouth.

So long everyone......

With that, I bit down.

I anticipated the taste. As I tried to chase it down with the ale, I could feel the poison taking effect. It felt like my blood had turned into acid and was trying to purge itself out of my body form the very pores of my skin. It was the worse kind of pain I had ever experienced, but instead of screaming in agony, I laid myself down onto my bed, staring at the ceiling, a content smile on my face. Though it was pure agony, I was ecstatic. I was able to finally feel something in my last hour. As I waited for the poison to finish it's work, I closed my eyes and enjoyed the silence of my empty house.

Goodbye..........

***

It was a clear fall evening in Ponyville, with all of Princess Luna's hard work on full display to all willing to see it. On this night, a certain lavender Alicorn happily made her way back to her castle from another wild party hosted by Ponyville's infamous Pinkie Pie. Perched on her back was her faithful dragon assistant munching on a cup of leftover gems Pinkie set aside for him on the way out.

"Ah, Pinkie really out did herself this time, huh Spike?"

"Yeah!" he cheered between clawfulls of gems. "When she said she wasn't gonna hold anything back this time, she really meant it."

"Poor Starlight didn't know what hit her," Twilight said with a slight chuckle.

"I think it was about forty tons of confetti and streamers to the muzzle," Spike said sarcastically.

"Hey, I told her she should've put up a barrier before she opened the door," Twilight shrugged. "I just want to know how she managed to get that Mega Party Cannon into Starlight Glimmer's house."

"Eh, it's Pinkie Pie," he shrugged with a final tone.

"True," Twilight sighed, knowing first hoof how fruitless figuring out how Pinkie Pie worked was. Not to mention painful.

It was at around this time that the duo made it to the main road to their home, but what got their attention wasn't the now familiar sight of the crystal castle, but a strange black mass laying in the middle of the path.

"Twilight?"

"I see it Spike," she whispered her tone a mix of cautious and curious.

"What do you think it is?"

She stared at it.

"Only one way to find out."

With that, she cautiously approached the mass, keeping a magical blast charged just in case. As she got closer, she noticed that what she thought was some black blob turned out to be a pony in a black cloak sprawled out in the middle of the road. The knowledge that she wasn't in the presence of some sort of unknown umbral horror from the pits tartarus was a reassuring one. When she got close enough to get a better look at the pony her relief shifted into worry. From what she could tell, the pony was a black-coated unicorn with a violet mane and curved horn. Based on its bulk, she assumed it was a stallion, but without doing a thorough examination, she couldn't be certain. What concerned her more than the unicorn's gender was his breathing, or to be more exact, his lac there of.

Twilight immediately dispelled her attack spell and ran a bio scan spell on the downed unicorn.

"Is-Is he okay?" Spike asked, getting down form his friend's back.

"I-I don't think so Spike," Twilight stammered, desperately hoping that her spell would detect any trace of life from the unicorn.

Please don't be dead! Please please please don't be dead!

She was about to give up hope when she felt it. It was faint, but her spell detected a heartbeat, as well as some lung activity.

"Oh thank Faust he's alive," she sighed.

"He is?!"

"Barely but yes."

As she said this, she latched onto the black unicorn with her magic and began to lift him up. However, the second he got more than a foot off of the ground, her spell canceled itself and he flopped to the ground like a sack of apples.

"Huh?" Twilight gasped. "What the-?"

She tried again, but this time she only lifted him an inch before her levitation spell dispelled itself.

What's going on?

"Twilight?"

The lavender alicorn shook herself out of her stunned state and decided that she could ponder this whole situation when the life of another pony didn't hang in the balance.

"Spike, help me move him," Twilight said before moving to the pony's front.

"Sure, but why don't we teleport to the hospital?"

"I can't!" she said, panic inching into her tone. "My magic isn't working for some reason."

"WHAT?!"

"SPIKE!!!"

"R-Right," the dragon cringed, waddling to his mistress's side. "But what are we gonna do?"

"I have some medical equipment in the lab," Twilight said, grabbing ahold of the hood of the pony's cloak with her hoof. " If we hurry, we should be able to save him. Now hurry and get the door for me!"

Rattled by the situation, Spike nodded and ran to the castle's main doors.

Please hang in there, she prayed as she dragged the almost corps into her castle. Please......

***

At first there was darkness. Just inky black nothingness as far as the eye could see along with the absence of feeling.

It wasn't going to be like this for long, I thought. If anything I read in catholic school was true, I was going to fall into an eternal plane of pain and flames for committing a capital sin. In spite of that, I felt content with the arrangement. For a waste of existence like myself, it was more than fitting.

Suddenly, a light appeared in the distance. At first it was about the size of a marble but as the seconds ticked by it steadily grew into a massive wall of pure light.

As I stared at it a single thought crossed my mind: Am I going to heaven?

It was then that a massive voice said two words that shook all of creation both in me and the world I drifted in: Not yet.

And just as suddenly as it appeared, the light vanished and with it so did the numbness surrounding my body as an amazing warmth wrapped around me. My body also felt heavy and really sore on my entire left side as if I had been punched. It also felt....wrong. Like most of my normal movements weren't natural.

Slowly, I opened my eyes.

I was in a large bed covered with what felt like really expensive lavender sheets. The room itself was pretty plane with the fact that the walls were made of some type of crystal mixed with marble being the only anomaly that I could see. That is, until the door to the room opened and an extremely familiar lavender alicorn stepped in, a tray of food and a book help above herself with her magic.

"Oh, your awake!" Twilight smiled, rushing towards me. "I'm so glad!

Without saying a word, I looked down at my hand and just as I half expected, instead of seeing a hand I saw a black pony's hoof and foreleg.

"Are you okay?" Twilight asked, pulling my attention away from my arm/leg.

"Go away."

"Excuse me?"

"Go away......"

"But-"

"JUST GO AWAY!!! ......Please......Just go way."

After a moment of hesitation, Twilight nodded and set the tray down on a table by the bed before exiting the room.

For a moment, I sat there, staring at what was probably going to be Twilight's lunch before I woke up. As I stared at the abandoned food a single thought echoed around inside my head.

I'm alive. But why?

At that moment my vision blurred as tears of disappointed anger pored from my eyes.

Why? Why?! WHY!? WHY?!

With that, curled into a ball under the sheets, still crying. Still wondering why I was still alive as I fell back to sleep.

Why......?

Author's Note

Please read beyond the first chapter before voting. That's all I ask