Baggage

It was a cool overcast day in Ponyville. Throughout the town, ponies went about there business as usual, Including a certain onyx Unicorn and lavender Alicorn.

"Are you sure you don't want to wear something else?" Twilight asked eyeing her black-cloaked neibore.

"Positive," Noon said, pulling his hood up a little more with his magic. "I don't want to draw unnecessary attention to myself right now. Plus, it's freezing out here.

As he said that, a chill shot down his spine.

Twilight raised a brow at that, but decided not to press the issue. From what she could tell about her house guest, Noon was much like the recluse she was before coming to Ponyville. And like with her, it would take a lot of time to get him to step out of his shell. Time, and some good friends. Speaking of which, Twilight was pleasantly surprised by how well Noon reacted to Pinkie's antics, half expecting collateral damage when her student, Starlight Glimmer, told her Pinkie had a roughly ten minute head start into the group visit. Instead, he formed both a professional and recreational relationship with the two mares, a huge improvement compared to the first few weeks prior. However, it did concern her that he seemed dead set on cloistering himself into the castle, even to the point of her having to bargain with him to get him to step out to get ready for his party later that day. In fact, if it wasn't for the cloak she found him in, they would probably still be at the castle arguing instead of making their way to Carousel Boutique to meet Rarity.

"Alright," she said, a hint of doubt coloring her tone. "I hope Rarity doesn't go into 'work mode' when she sees it."

He shrugged.

"So long as she doesn't turn me into a walking disco ball of gems, she can do whatever she wants to this thing."

Twilight let out an uneasy laugh.

"I don't know if I can promise that."

They shared a laugh at that as they began to close in on their destination. As they entered the boutique, a bell range from above the door, alerting the building's residents to their arrival. On cue, a cheerful female voice with a slight Canterlot accent sang "Just a minuuuuute."
A few minutes later a white unicorn with a styled purple mane stepped into view.

Welcome to the Carousel Boutique, where every thing is-"

Before she finished her sales pitch, her eyes fell upon Noon Scribe and she froze. Her eyes quickly shank down to pinpricks and her body began to tremble with barely contained fear. Twilight eyed her friend wearily, not sure what could've brought about this reaction in the white Unicorn. Just as Twilight was about to ask what had Rarity so shook up she let out a terrified scream and bolted for the boutique's rear exit. The two stood there for a moment, the only interruption to the awkward silence being the sound of a draft slamming the backdoor shut.

"Well......that happened," Noon said, turning back to the front door.

"What?!" Twilight exclaimed, fallowing him out of the boutique. "Don't you want to no what that was about?"

"Why?" he asked, his face a cold mask. "The whole point of us coming here was so I could meet Rarity, right? Well, we met, and obviously something about me scared the Tearek out of her. Mission accomplished."

Twilight wanted to argue further, but the finality in Noons tone made her reconsider. Instead, as she guided him towards Sugarcube Corner, she tried to decipher Rarity's behavior.

What the hay was that all about? Was Noon's cloak that bad looking? No that can't be it. If it was the case, she probably would've dragged him kicking and screaming into the fitting room. Then what could've scared her so badly?

Deciding to set the mystery aside for another time, Twilight continued to engage in more small talk with her new friend. For the most part, she only got a few quick responses until she fell to her fallback topic: books. The second the topic came up, Noon's mood did a complete one-eighty. He was much more animated, both in his speech and mannerisms, and even though Twilight didn't recognize the titles he mentioned, it filled her heart with joy to see the hard-shelled stallion next to her being so passionate.

"Well here we are," she said, gesturing towards the bakery. "Are you ready?"

"As I'll ever be," he shrugged. "Let's do this."

With that, Twilight opened the door and the two stepped into the tower of sugar that is Sugarcube Corner.

***

When I stepped though those doors, I didn't know what to expect. I mean, this Is Pinkie Pie were talking about here. I half expected gravity to suddenly stop working or something along those lines. Instead, I got an even bigger shock; Pinkie actually fallowed through on my request. Aside from Twilight and I, the main service room was occupied by six ponies. One was a pony I could safely identify as Berry Punch standing by the refreshments table making a wide variety of colorful glowing drinks. Another was a pony I would've had to have had suffered a major blow to the head not to recognize as Vinyl Scratch working on a turn table and set of speakers in the farthest corner. At the center of the room stood the Cakes, Pinkie, and my semi-official Magic Tutor Starlight Glimmer.

Huh, well done Pinkie. Well done.

Feeling a bit more relaxed now that I was sure I wasn't going to get ambushed by confetti again, I casually walked towards the small group.

"Hiya Noon," Pinkie cheered blurring into existence right in front of me. "What'd ya think?"

"Not bad Pinkie," I smiled. "But I'm betting this isn't all you've got up your sleeves."

Pinkie flashed me a mischievous smirk and said, "Maybe, maybe not. You'll just have ta wait and see."

"Looking forward to it."

With a light chuckle, Pinkie bounced off, leaving me alone with her bosses and the two most powerful mares in equestria. The only problem, I'm pretty terrible when it comes to talking to women. Don't get me wrong, I can talk to them if its about a topic I understand, but outside of that I tend to flop pretty badly. So, I did what any guy with a self-esteem problem would do; suggest getting smashed.

"Anypony want a drink, cuz I could use one."

Before they could respond, I trotted over to the refreshments table.

Smooth man. Real smooth.

Aw shut up!

Still kicking myself, I grabbed a fizzy red drink and threw it back. Probably not the best idea considering who helped with the catering. First came the cold, then a flash of slightly bitter strawberries combined with the tickling fizz of Sprite teamed up with a strong blast of a LOT of alcohol. I went from normal to fubared in two seconds flat and at that moment, I liked it. A lot.

"What in the name of all things holy is this?" I smiled, teetering slightly.

"Oh that?" responded one of the three Berry Punches standing next to the table. "Just a little something I call a Parasprite Mirage."

"Oh," I said, enjoying the effects of the unexpectantly powerful drink. "Nice."

"Thanks, want another?"

"Eeyup!" I said, barely able to hold back my laughter from my own poorly done BM imitation.

Berry let out a chuckle at my antics.

"No problem. Hear you go."

As she said this, she handed me another prepared glass.

"Just try not to down it all in one go this time. This is the kind of drink your supposed to nurse."

"I make absolutely no promises," I said, trying (and failing) to keep a strait face as I grabbed the glass with my magic.

Berry shrugged.

"Eh, your funeral."

I laughed like an idiot and made my way back to the girls.

"Hey Teach! Landlord! You have a chance to have some of this stuff?! It's pretty good!"

That made up most of the party. Well, aside from Vinyl's awesome table work. Plus, I never thought I'd ever see Twilight use a funnel. Pinkie wasn't to much of a surprise, but Twilight? In the heat of all the action I came to notice something; my buzz kept burning out way to fast. I mean, in the span twenty-five minutes after each drink I'd go from bumbling moron to normal. It got to the point that I had to throw back Berry's drinks instead of nurse them just to stay a little buzzed. Eventually, I gave up and just helped myself to some of the sweets the Cakes had setup for the party.

Geez, way ta kill the mood, I thought gnawing on a cookie. Then again, maybe getting hammered around three naked girls who are also pretty smashed is probably a really bad idea to begin with.

Deciding to push my slightly idled mind away from anything that might trigger the Unicorn equivalent of a wing boner, I walked over to a very happy Pinkie Pie that seemed to be phasing in and out of this dimension.

"Hey Pinkie?"

"Yeah?" she slurred.

"I think I'm gonna head back to the Castle."

Pinkie seemed to literally deflate hearing this.

"But why? Arn't ya having fun?"

"Yeah, I'm just getting a little tired is all. Will you let Twilight know for me?"

"Sure!" she cried, performing a salute that almost knocked her over.

Though slightly unsure about my choice to put my faith in the drunk party planner, I made my way to the exit. Just as I was about to open it, the door burst open and in stepped Applejack, an unnervingly cold expression on her face. Right behind her I spotted Rarity, looking at me with the same fear as when she saw me last time. The second Applejack's eyes locked onto me, her expression shifted to furious and in a flash I felt an explosion of what I can only describe as the worst pain I'd felt sense my death erupt in my chest as I went flying in the air. I let out an agonized grunt as I hit the ground, gasping for my lost air.

"Applejack!" I heard a voice I could barely recognize as Twilight's scream from across the room. "What in the name of Faust are you doing."

"Keep'n y'all safe," she growled, slowly moving in on me. "Yah never never know what ta expect from Karkadanns."

Karka-what?

"Terrible pony eatin' monsters. Ah thought they all died out after the fall of the Crystal Empire, but looks like a few survived."

I looked up just in time to see Applejack rase her front legs, hooves aimed strait for my head. My eyes widened as the farmpony's intentions sunk in. Before I could do anything a blue aura surrounded Applejack, holding her in place.

"Starlight!" Applejack grunted. "What the hay are ya doin'?"

"I could ask you that same question," Twilight asked moving into my line of sight and helping me get to my feet. "Noon, are you okay?"

I didn't say anything. A torrent of emotions were running through me, shock, confusion, fear, but devouring them all was anger. Both at the orange Earth Pony that attacked me and myself for letting my guard down low enough to let this attack happen.

"I'm fine," I muttered, pushing past the pain in my barrel to stagger out the open front door.

"But-"

"I'M FINE!"

Twilight and the rest of the party guests flinched.

Noticing this, I reeled in my anger and in a much calmer voice said "I'm sorry. Just let me get some air for a while. I'll meet you at the castle later."

Not waiting for a response, I used my magic to close the door and walked away from what was once a good party. I did stop for a second when I noticed a bit of purple fur peeking out from behind a nearby bush. As a show of aggression, I used my magic to rip the bush out of the ground and found a trembling Rarity. I stared down at the scared unicorn and in a voice filled with as much venom as I could manage hissed "Pathetic," and continued my journey.

Why? I thought, my steps gradually becoming more heavy.

Why?! WHY?! WHY IS THIS SHIT HAPPENING TO ME?! DID I KICK A BUNCH OF PUPIES IN A PAST LIFE OR SOMETHING?! WHAT THE HELL DID I DO THAT WAS SO BAD THAT I GET SHIT THROWN AT ME HERE OF ALL PLACES?! WHAT IS IT GONNA TAKE FOR ME TO HAVE EVEN A TINY MOMENT OF HAPPINESS?! WHAT THE HELL IS IT GONNA TAKE?!

It wasn't until I started to see red that I noticed two things. One, I forgot my cloak at the party and two it was starting to rain.

"Terrific," I mumbled, shaking my dampening coat.

I took a look around and found that my blind wandering had taken me out of Ponyville and about a stones throw away from the Everfree Forest.

Maybe if I move in there I could get some peace.

Before my thoughts could go beyond that, I found myself pounded into the ground with enough force to form a crater. Like before the wind was knocked out of my lungs, but along with my breath a small stream of red burst from my mouth.

"W-What now?" I gasped, staggering to my feet.

"Dang it! I knew I should've hit it harder."

That voice......you have got to be kidding me!

I raised my head and sure enough, hovering above me was none other than Rainbow Dash. The Cyan Pegasus glared daggers at me, every muscle tense and ready for action.

"AJ wasn't kidding! You really are tough!"

My rage started to return.

"So what?" I growled. "Did you just try to pound me into the ground to test that or are you gonna give me crap too?!"

"'Too'? What did you do to Applejack and Rarity?"

I let out an irritated snort.

"Nothing. But if you don't back off you'll regret it."

Rainbow's eyes narrowed.

"Is that a threat?"

"No," I snarled through gritted teeth. "Its a promise. Or maybe your too stupid to know the difference!"

"Alright!" she roared. "That's it! You're so dead!"

"BRING IT!!!"

With that, Rainbow blurred out of existence, but before she could hit me again I raised a foreleg and slammed it into her barrel. The Pegasus let out a strangled gasp as she flew back and slammed into a tree.

"PAYBACKS A BITCH, HUH?!"

Coughing, Rainbow stood back up and glared at me.

"That all you can take?! Talk about lame!"

"Not even close!"she snarled and bolted towards me.

I prepared to throw another pony haymaker but before it could connect, Rainbow changed direction and landed a heavy blow to my side. I turned, but it was too late and another attack hit my back. Before I knew it, I was trapped in a hurricane of pain and rainbow trails. Adding to the difficulty was the mud bellow me screwing up my balance. All I could do was stand there and take it. I wasn't even close to fast enough to keep up with Rainbow Dash now that she was serious. But something kept me from surrendering. Not something as stupid as pride or determination. No this was something far more useful in a fight; rage. I could live with getting attacked by Applejack seeing as I never really liked her all that much, Rainbow Dash was something else. Rainbow was my favorite Main Six member and even at her worst I loved the spirit she put into everything she did. To be beaten on by her was a new kind of treachery that filled my body with so much white hot fury, I was numb to the blows raining down on me.

That. Is. ENOUGH!!!

"Get broken," I growled.

A split second later, a loud crack filled the air, fallowed by a female cry of agony.

"My hoof!" Rainbow cried, hovering a few feet away from me, cradling her left front hoof. "What did you do to my hoof?!"

"Karma."

On cue, a bolt of lightning ripped out of the sky and slammed into the shaken Pegasus, filling the air with yet another agonized scream.
With that, Rainbow fell to the grown, fur slightly scorched and feathers all but nonexistent.

"My-My wings!" she gasped, tears starting to form at the corners of her eyes.

"I told you you'd regret it," I said, tone as cold as ice as I limped towards her.

She turned towards me, pure terror in her tear-struck eyes.

"P-Please! Don't kill me! I-I-I-"

Like a cornered animal, she limped away from me, eventually pinning herself against a tree. I continued my pursuit, albeit, at a much more casual pace. All the while, the bubbling cauldron of hate within me dropping down to a simmer. I had the upper hand in this fight now. I knew it and most importantly, Rainbow Dash knew it. The trembling creature before me wasn't worthy of my hate, but she still deserved some kind of penalty for her crimes.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!!!"

With a roar of concentrated fury, a pulled back a foreleg and struck. The air was instantly filled with the sound of wood shattering as the tree behind Rainbow exploded behind her from the the space above her head and up.

"You're not worth killing."

She looked at me, light blue coat now white as a sheet, eyes bigger than dinner plates. This was the look of a mare who just had a brush with death and was lucky enough to tell the tale.

With a sigh, I gently grasped her with my magic and lowered her onto my back.

"Wh-What are ya gonna do to me?"

"Hospital," I grunted. "We both need it."

"Hospital? I-I don't believe you!"

I smiled a bit, happy to hear a little of my favorite pony's attitude.

"How do I know your not just taking me to your place to eat me?"

"You don't," I said flatly. "So you could either trust me or make yourself look like a mule. Your choice."

A moment of silence and then "Hee-Haw."

I sighed.

"Suit yourself, Rainbow Ass."