After Sunset rewrite

by Minecraftmaz61

Rating: teen
Tags: Princess Luna, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Sunset Shimmer, Dark, Alternate Universe, Sad
Length: 1127

My sister is Sunset Shimmer and she doesn't even know I exist

Sunset is my older sister. She left before I was born by all I ever hear is that I can never be as good as her.
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Note: this is a rewrite of a story I wrote a while ago that was low quality and I wasn't happy with it. It was my second ever fic so I just thought I would rewrite it

Published 2016-02-23 01:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-02-23 01:10:01 UTC

After sunset

My name is Moonlight Shine and I can never be as good as my sister.

Sunset Shimmer is the favourite of my parents but I hate her. She is the perfect child in my mothers words and I can never be as great as the legendary Sunset.

She was a unicorn like me, she was a student at Celestia's school for gifted unicorns like I am but she was a student of Celestia herself like I am not. This is the big difference between us, the only thing my parents see.

Princess Luna is the only pony that understands what it is like to be shadowed by an older sister. She visits the school often and after she saw me crying over a letter of ridicule from my mother for not getting perfect scored like Sunset Shimmer did decided to take me on as her own student. She was the only pony that ever told me I was good enough, the only pony that had ever made me feel wanted in that moment.

I told my parents about it the next time I visited home but they said Luna wasn't the important princess. I made the mistake of saying that their darling run away Sunset Shimmer wasn't important.

My mother beat me bloody and then threw me out into the cold night air. The cold mixed with the wounds made my body feel like it was on fire. I didn't try to get up or help myself, I couldn't, I just sat there and cried myself to sleep.

I walked for miles to get away from them and back to the school when I woke up and just went to my room. I ignored the ponies asking if I was ok or I needed help and just went and laid there in silence. Luna came to speak with me and I told her what had happened. She promised me I would never have to go back to them and that I could live here in the academy. I felt loved when I was in her hooves, something my family had never made me feel. I felt special as I was cradled in luna's hooves.

A week later I got a letter from my parents. They told me that they were disgusted with me for running away and that they were disowning me. They said that I was not my mothers daughter. I was the result of a one night stand my father had with a random mare in a bar. She was unable to keep me so my father took me in much to the one I called mother's disliking. She said she tried to raise me, to try and love me but I was such a disgrace to the family name that she couldn't love a creature like me. I could never be a replacement for Sunset bucking Shimmer.

A few months later I heard a couple of fillies talking about how Princess Twilight Sparkle had gone to another dimension to take down an evil villainous she-demon that had stolen one of the elements of harmony.

Then I heard her name.

Sunset Shimmer.

She was the only family left that I could go to and she didn't know I existed. I was conceived 3 months after she left. 3 months of my parents pain from her before I happened.

I ran to speak with princess Luna and she said she would speak to Princess Twilight about taking me to see my sister.

A week later I am in ponyville and walking towards the castle. I open the door to see the princess standing there. She seems tense but I guess my situation isn't just uncomfortable for me. She is overseeing me reconnecting with a family member that has no idea I am even real.

"Are you ready for this?" She asks me

I have no idea how to respond. I want to see her but it feels like a billion butterflies have just hatched in my stomach. I work up the courage and finally speak.

"Ready as I'll ever be" I say with a nervous smile.

We step into the portal and find ourselves in front of a school named canterlot high. I take a few moments to adjust to my new form and we step inside.

After a short walk we are stood outside the music room. I hear a soft tune from within that slightly loosens my nerves.

"I'll be out here if you need me, go for it, Moonlight" the princess smiles.

I take a deep breath and walk inside. I see 6 girls standing around the room. They all look at me as I enter.

"Can we help you kiddo?" The rainbow haired one asks

"Do I know you?" One voice says. I turn to see its Sunset, for all my life I had hated her but now I saw her with love, she was my family.

"Hi, Sunset, my...my name is Moonlight Shines and...and I uh...I am your...your sister." I stutter

"I don't have a sister" she says in a confused way

"Technically no, but you do have a half sister" I smile

"How? Are you from canterlot?" She asks

"Yeah, Mom and Dad were kinda torn up after you left. Dad started drinking and one thing lead to another and then I happened"

Sunset looks at me, really taking me in and then she stops for a second.

"Why didn't they come with you?"

I take a deep breath and decide that she deserves to know.

"A few months ago they beat me half to death, threw me out into the cold night and a few weeks later they finally disowned me, I have been living at Celestia's school ever since." I tell her with tears in my eyes. I may have hated my parents but it still hurt to be abandoned.

Sunset reached forward hand hugged me.

"Moonlight, I know we just met but I want you to know that I am here for you, you don't have to be alone anymore"

"Thank you Sunset"

Later that day we looked at some things and Sunset told me I could stay in the human world with her. We could be a family. Twilight said she would thank Princess Luna for me and left me with Sunset.

It is the late night when we get to her apartment and she puts me in her room. I look out the window to see as sunset shimmers, moonlight shines.

Author's Note

So this is a version of the story that I am much happier with. Excuse bad writing because, as usual, I write this at 1:17 am. Any comments and criticism is recommended and thank you for reading