Tales Of Equestria

Chapters

After Somepony To Watch Over Me
Rarity Tries To Read The Paper
Daring Do Shares My Opinion Of Shipping
Derpy and Dinky Have A Fight
A Spoiled Brat
Something Short And Random
Sorry
Celestia And Luna Playing Scrabble
Teenage Celestia Foalsits Her Baby Sister
Spitfire Gets It

After Somepony To Watch Over Me

Applejack and Applebloom were walking home from their pie delivery. The delivery was a success but the Apple sisters went through major problems with Applejack going crazy and Applebloom almost getting herself killed by a chimera.

They approached the house door before AJ turned to her little sister, "Now Applebloom. Do you understand that you need to be punished for this?"

Applebloom nodded.

"Good." Applejack opened the door. Inside Big Mac and Granny Smith looked like they were in a major battle.

"Where have YOU been!?" Granny Smith scolded Applebloom.

Applebloom was about to say something but she was cut off by her sister, "I think you may want to sit down for this Granny."

Granny sat on the couch, then crossed her forelegs, "Well youngins?"

Applejack was confused by Granny using a plural, but she gently shoved Applebloom in front of her, "I'm afraid Applebloom got herself into serious trouble."

Granny looked to Applebloom, "What KIND of trouble?"

Applebloom lowered her head, "I...I...I ran away from Applejack to try to prove to her that I can take care of myself...and I went about the wrong way."

Granny turned to Applejack, "Why would you NEED to prove to her that you can take care of yourself? Didn't Applejack tell me that she already believed that?"

"I know I said that...but afterwords I started getting second thoughts and so I decided to stay behind and watch Applebloom, but then she went and almost got killed by..." Applejack said but was interrupted by Granny.

"Didn't I tell you to go on that trip to deliver pies?"

"Well...yes, but..."

Granny interrupted, "Then why did you stay HERE?"

Applejack looked perplexed, "Well I thought..."

Granny got up and put her face in front of AJ's, "LOOK APPLEJACK!" Granny stopped talking and took a few breaths, "Applejack, I thought you were smarter than this. We all voted that Applebloom was ready to look after herself. In fact, you yourself were home alone a lot; and that was when you were younger than Applebloom is now."

"But Granny, she went and almost got herself killed." Argued Applejack politely.

"Well then why did you BRING her with you?"

"I did no such thing. She decided that she should prove to me that she could take care of herself so she got the silly idea to deliver those pies herself."

Granny raised an eyebrow, "And if you delivered those pies yourself, like I told you, she'd be safe at home. Consarnit Applejack I thought you were smarter than this!"

Applejack took a deep breath, then said, "So I take it you aren't going to ground her?"

"Ground her?" Asked a rather ticked off Granny Smith, "If you were a lot younger I'd ground YOU. Applebloom was..." Granny stopped and thought about something, "Now that I think of it when your brother and I got home we found everything tied up and even Applebloom's bed made into a crib. Did YOU do that Applejack?"

"Um...Yes?" Answered Applejack.

"CONSARNIT APPLEJACK! No wonder your sister did what she did!" Scolded Granny Smith, "Why, if I ever did something like that to YOU you'd probably throw one hay of a tantrum."

Granny Smith walked back to the couch, sat down and said, "I'm VERY disappointed in you Applejack. I thought I could trust you to deliver those pies."

"But Granny, doesn't family come first before pies?" Asked Applejack.

"Well you weren't caring for your family; you disobeyed your family."

Granny looked towards Applebloom, "I'm sorry this happened to you deary. But please tell me; have you learned anything out of this?"

Applebloom lowered her head, "I learned that I shouldn't do dangerous things, even if it seems okay at the time."

"Good." Granny turned back to Applejack, "Now, from now on I expect you to do as I say Applejack. No more driving your sister to almost get herself killed."

"But...I..." Stuttered a confused Applejack.

"Applejack." Scolded Granny Smith, "You are 21 years old, ACT your age."

Applejack was too shocked to say anything, so she just walked away to her room.

Applebloom sat on the couch next to Granny, "Are you sure this is the right thing to do Granny? Applejack was just trying to help."

Granny placed a hoof over her youngest granddaughter, "Applebloom, what she did wasn't 'trying to help' what she did was let her emotions control her; and she did it to the point where she almost got you killed. And she even turned your bed into a crib and made my rocking chair unrockable."

THE END

Rarity Tries To Read The Paper

Rarity was in her kitchen reading the paper. Apparently there was another Dianoga found nosing around the Manehattan sewers; and the Fillydelphia Zoo gave birth to two leopard cubs, one of them turning out to be a black leopard.

Suddenly Sweetie Belle burst through the door shouting "RARITY!"

Rarity jumped out of her seat, then said, "Sweetie Belle! I'd appreciate it if you'd not scare me like that again."

"Sorry sis." Said Sweetie Belle, "Anyway I found a bit while walking home from school."

"That's nice Sweetie." Rarity said disinterestedly.

Sweetie Belle looked over Rarity's shoulder to see what she was reading, "Do you wanna do something with me Rarity?"

Rarity sighed, "I'm sorry Sweetie but I'm too tired to do anything; I'll just be reading up on the news."

Sweetie grumbled and went to the next room.

Rarity continued reading the paper.

"CRASH!"

"WHA!" Screamed Rarity.

Somepony threw a baseball through her window. Rarity ran out the door and noticed that Snips and Snails were just outside her door.

"Hey Rarity. Can we have our ball back?" Said Snips.

Rarity's face turned red, "No you may not have your ball! Not if you break other pony's windows with it!"

"We'd never do that." Argued Snails.

"You just DID." Rarity argued back.

Rarity grabbed each colt by their ears with her aura, "Now come along you two, I'm going to have a long talk with your parents." She dragged the two colts away.

As Snails and Snips were being dragged away Snips said to Snails, "Well here's another nice mess you've gotten me into."

"But...ow...I...ow." Snails tried to defend himself but couldn't due to being dragged by his ear and not being able to come up with a retort.

THE END

Author's Note

A 'Dianoga' is that thing that attacked Luke Skywalker in the garbage compactor in Star Wars Episode 4.

Daring Do Shares My Opinion Of Shipping

Author's Note

Warning:
This is anti-shipping. If you are proud of shipping character then either knock it off or don't read this chapter.

Daring Do Shares My Opinion Of Shipping

Daring Do was pacing around her cottage. She didn't like to get upset over matters she had no control over, but she couldn't get over her frustration over her good for nothing fans.
The majority of them had little care for plot, character development, or anything; they just wanted to ship everypony with everypony. It was infuriating.
She never told too many ponies that Daring DO was real and that these books were actually her autobiography; but she still wished those retards would have similar (if not identical) views of Daring Do the character as Daring Do the actual author.

Daring Do stopped and took a deep breath. She hated getting worked up about this matter.

"Why can't those dumb clucks ever knock off shipping me with Ahuizotl?!" Daring shouted, "I'm asexual, Ahuizotl is evil and isn't even the same species as me! Why should a pony be in love with him anymore than a pony should be in love with their dog! And if nothing else shipping just means you lack a decent imagination!"

Daring stepped over towards her window, opened it, then shouted at the top of her lungs, "Shipping is the bane of my existence! STOP IT YOU GRUNTS!"

Daring closed the window and sighed, "Romance is fine and all, but it needs to be kept in it's place."

THE END

Derpy and Dinky Have A Fight

It was a beautiful day in Ponyville.

Dinky Doo finally finished her homework. At the beginning of the year her grades weren't up to snuff, but now her grades have skyrocketed.

Dinky walked to her mother Derpy, who was reading some of her mail.

"Oh dear!" Derpy groaned, "I've got ANOTHER summons."

Dinky frowned, she hated it when her mother made mistakes.

"What happened Mommy?"

Derpy turned around, "Oh nothing muffin."

Dinky frowned, she hated not being told about important stuff.

"Don't give me THAT!" Dinky normally didn't shout at her mother, but secrets are more trouble than they're worth, "I heard you got another summons and I want to know what it's about NOW!"

Derpy frowned and raised an eyebrow, "Now now muffin, don't use that tone with me."

Dinky sighed, "Then tell me what this summons is all about."

Derpy turned around, crossed her forelegs and said, "No!"

That was the last straw. Dinky began banging her front and fore legs on the ground, "IT'S NOT FAIR MAMMA! YOU NEVER TELL ME ANYTHING! WAAAH!"

Derpy ignored her daughter and went out the door.

"Where do you think YOU'RE going!" Dinky shouted.

"OUT!" Derpy shouted back and slammed the door.

Later that night Dinky crawled into her bed. Then Derpy walked into Dinky's room.

"What do YOU want?" Huffed Dinky.

Derpy lowered her head, "I'm sorry I yelled at you earlier. You're right, I should tell you what I've been summoned for."

Derpy crawled into Dinky's bed and wrapped a foreleg around her daughter, "I've been summoned because I smashed somepony's window by mistake."

Dinky looked up at her mother, "Are you going to jail?"

"No muffin, I'll most likely have to pay a fine."

Dinky sighed, "But why wouldn't you tell me?"

Derpy sniffled, "Sorry muffin, I guess I acted out of ageism. Often when a parent goes through something serious the parent doesn't let their child know. But it is wrong; we should ALWAYS let our children know what's going on."

Dinky hugged Derpy, "I love you mamma."

"I love you too muffin."

THE END

A Spoiled Brat

Cadence approached her client's house. She's seen how a good portion of the Canterlot nobility tended to behave (including her own cousin Blueblood) and she was determined not to be like that; so she decided to be a babysitter.
Most foalsitters were for hire but since she's already loaded she's doing it for the fulfillment and good deed.

Cadence knocked on the door. Her client Writer answered. She was a blue unicorn mare with a white mane, and a quill and scroll for a cutie mark.

"Good day your highness." Said Writer.

Cadence smiled, "Please mam I'd rather not be treated like royalty while on foalsitting duty."

Cadence entered the building and found Heartache sitting on the couch. Heartache was a blank flanked blue earthpony filly with a white mane, at the age of 10.

Cadence approached Heartache and said, "Hi there. How're you doing?"

Heartache glared at Cadence and said, "None of your $@%# business."

That comment shocked Cadence, when she was her age Celestia would've been angry like nopony's business if Cedence would've said that to anypony.

Writer approached the door while saying over her shoulder, "Have fun you two. And there's corn and cabbage for my darling's dinner; or you can have anything in the fridge you want except the carrot cake, that's for the bake sale tomorrow." Then Writer left.

Heartache huffed and raised her nose up in the air, "I can't believe a pony of your stature would get a job." Heartache stepped off the couch and walked upstairs to her room.

Cadence was beginning to worry; so far this filly was being rather rude. But hay, why should she believe this filly is bad for that? Heartache could just be confused; in fact her name 'Heartache' could mean she's in a lot of pain.

Just then Heartache came down with some bits. She approached Cadence and said, "Here lady, 30 bits to go away."

Again Cadence became shocked. Was this filly seriously trying to bribe her?

Cadence lowered her head to Heartache's level, "Now now little filly, it's wrong to bribe ponies."

Heartache rolled her eyes, "Alright I'll make it 40 bits."

Cadence raised her eyebrow, "I'm not going to leave a foal home alone for something I've already got enough of."

"60 bits, and that's my final offer." Offered Heartache.

"How about instead I go fix dinner." Offered Cadence as she went to the kitchen.

Once in the kitchen Cadence opened the fridge door, she found the corn and cabbage. She proceeded to take it out and could not wait to have it.

Heartache rushed into the kitchen while shouting, "What the #$@% will get you to go away you stupid princess!"

Cadence nearly jumped. Why was this filly so desperate to get rid of her.

"Why do you want me gone so badly?" Asked Cadence.

Heartache harumphed, "I don't need a #@$% foalsitter, I can take care of myself; my mom is just so mean!"

Cadence placed her hoof on Heartache's shoulder, "Now now sweetheart, I've known your mother for years; I even remember when she was born; and I can honestly say she is a very caring mare."

Heartache's mouth gaped open, "You were alive when my mom was born? You're an old lady."

"Not when you're an alicorn like me." Said Cadence.

"How old ARE you?" Asked Heartache.

"I was born over a thousand years ago." Answered Cadence.

"HAHAHA!" Heartache began laughing hysterically.

Cadence rolled her eyes, "I'll be making dinner."

While Cadence began fixing corn and cabbage she heard the fridge door open. Cadence turned around and found Heartache digging around the fridge.
Cadence used her powers to levitate Heartache and close the fridge door.

"HAY!" Heartache was shouting while being levitated away from the fridge, "How'd you see me? You was turned around."

"It's 'you WERE' not 'you WAS' and I HEARD you open the door." Explained Cadence.

"But I want that carrot cake, mom said I can!" Whined Heartache.

Cadence giggled, "Now now, your mother herself just told me it's for a bake sale tomorrow. Don't you know that lying is wrong?" Cadence placed Heartache down on one of the kitchen chairs.

"BUT I WANT SOME!" Heartached screamed, then began to wail; she even was banging her front hooves on the table.

Cadence sighed. She enjoyed foalsitting, but sometimes she wished she'd quit.

Cadence lifted Heartache up again and carried her to her room.

Once they got to Heartache's room Cadence placed the wailing child on her bed and said, "Until you learn to behave you have to stay in your room."

Cadence started fixing the corn and cabbage. The whole time Heartache was screaming.
Cadence wondered if she was like this as a child. Then again, most foals around Heartache's age behaved better than this. It seemed like this foal was just being naughty.

Cadence sighed, not out of frustration but out of sadness. She didn't want to have bad viewpoints of others, especially children; but her friend Writer might have spoiled this filly a bit.

Later Cadence finished cooking and brought the food up to Heartache. Heartache was still throwing a tantrum.

Cadence opened the door and found that Heartache has trashed her room. Their were toys and books all over the floor, and the bed was unmade, and there was even a hole in the wall.

"Goodness kiddo, why'd you trash your bedroom?" Cadence asked.

Heartache ran up to Cadence and kicked her in her front left leg (causing her to drop Heartache's food).

"OW! That wasn't nice at all young mare!" Scolded Cadence.

"You're not the boss of me $%#@!" Shouted Heartache.

Cadence levitated Heartache up and proceeded to carry her into the bathroom. Then in a soft and kindly voice Cadence said, I'm sorry Heartache, but I can't allow you to behave this way."

Once in the bathroom Cadence placed Heartache on the sink and then washed her mouth up with soap.

"Mmh! Ack!" Screamed Heartache.

"I don't like doing this but you can't behave this way." Stated Cadence.

Cadence was finally home. She began to walk down the Canterlot halls where she came upon Celestia.

"How'd your foalsitting job go Cadence?" Celestia said just before noticing Cadence looked like a wreck.

"Oh my. What happened Cadence?"

Cadence looked up at Celestia and said, "I had the worst babysitting job EVER. Writer's filly is the most spoiled rotten brat I have ever met." Cadence then broke into tears.

Celestia placed a wing on her, "What did Writer have to say about this?"

"She had the nerve to accuse me of hurting her child. Heartache (her foal) threw a temper tantrum because I wouldn't let her eat a cake her mother was saving for a bake sale tomorrow, and in the process of the tantrum she made a huge mess in her room, she even made a hole in her wall; and when Writer finally gets home she has the audacity to accuse ME of making the hole." Cadence broke down crying.

"I...I thought...I thought Writer was my FRIEND." Choked Cadence.

THE END

Author's Note

This takes place sometime just before Cadence babysat Twilight Sparkle.

Something Short And Random

Once upon a time there was a little pony who said, "I wonder what my sister is doing today."

So said little pony went to a local shoe store and asked, "I'm here to order a hamburger."

And thus the clerk gave her a giant beanstalk and they all lived happily ever after.

THE END

Sorry

I'm sorry for making a promise that I'll make new chapters but never do. :raritycry:

Celestia And Luna Playing Scrabble

Celestia was in her bedroom with Luna; they were playing Scrabble. Luna put down the first word, which was 'Drown'.

"22 points Tia." Luna said as she wrote down her score.

Celestia noticed that she didn't have much to work with. Until she found some words to put on, only for them to not be worth too much.

"Having trouble Tia?" Smirked Luna.

"I'll find something." Argued Celestia.

Celestia found that all she could put was 'fin' for 6 points.

Luna stuck her tongue out, "I'm winning."

"I'll catch up." Declared Celestia.

Luna placed 'Fiery' down for 13 points. "The fun has been doubled." Luna stuck her tongue out at Celestia again.

'Why is my sister so childish?' Thought Celestia, who noticed she still had few vowels; so Celestia was forced to place 'Vine' for 7 points.

Again Luna stuck her tongue out at her sister, "I'm STILL winning."

Luna placed 'Spike' down for 24 points.

"You know names aren't aloud in this game Luna." Scolded Celestia.

Luna raised an eyebrow, "Spike is NOT just a name Tia." This time Celestia stuck her tongue out at Luna.

Celestia placed 'Moon' down for 12 points.

"HEY! That's MY word!" Complained Luna.

"Says who?" Said Celestia who stuck her tongue out.

Luna placed 'Goes' down, which landed her on a tripler.

"No fair landing on a tripler Luna!" Complained Celestia.

"It's still only 9 points Tia." Luna said sticking her her tongue out.

It was now Celestia's turn, but she couldn't find a word that fit. That is until she put the word 'Yells' on for 9 points.

Luna instantly placed 'Best' on for 12 points.

After a few more turns, Celestia placed the word 'Duh' down for 14 points.

"That's not a word that can be used in Scrabble Tia!" Whined Luna.

"It's a word isn't it?" Asked Celestia who stuck her tongue out.

Luna crossed her forelegs and grumbled.

After awhile the game ended with Luna was the winner.

"HA! In your face Tia!" Shouted Luna who blew a raspberry at Celestia.

Celestia picked up her pillow with her powers, "PILLOW FIGHT!" Celestia whacked Luna in the face.

"Oh...it...is...on!" Luna dramatically proclaimed.

Luna picked up a pillow and the two alicorns fought each other.

A royal guard hurriedly entered the royal bedroom, "Your highnesses! Is everything alright?"

Luna and Celestia stopped their pillow fight and blushed.

"Sorry sir." Spoke Celestia, "But running the kingdom makes us both need to blow off some steam. So every now and then the two of us play a few games and...well..." Celestia blushed some more, "I'm afraid today we got a little carried away."

The guard shook his head, "Sorry, just checking." He left the room.

Celestia looked at Luna, and Luna looked at Celestia. They realized that they had been behaving like children.

THE END

Teenage Celestia Foalsits Her Baby Sister

Author's Note

Warning: Celestia is mean to Luna in here.

Teenage Celestia Foalsits Her Baby Sister

"BUT MOM!" Whined 15 year old Celestia to her mother.

"No buts; I need you to foalsit Luna right now." Snapped Fausticorn.

Celestia rolled her eyes and trotted to her little sister's bed.
Luna was going to turn four in 4 months, and currently was jumping for joy.

"I get to pway wif Cewesia!" Shouted Luna.

Celestia sat next to her hyper sister and mockingly said, "Does the widdle baby wanna pway?"

"I'M NOT A BABY!" Screamed Luna.

"Be nice Celestia." Scolded Fausticorn, "I now need to leave." She left.

Celestia turned to Luna, "So squirt..."

"Don't caw me squirt!" Interrupted Luna.

"But I LIKE to call you squirt." Teased Celestia.

"MOOOOOOOOOOM!" Shouted Luna.

"She's not here, remember?" Said Celestia.

"Oh yeah." Luna said and then hit Celestia with her pillow.

"PILLOW FIGHT!" Shouted Luna and kept hitting Celestia.

Celestia just levitated Luna up away from her pillow and kept her in the air.

"NO FAIR!" Shouted Luna.

"I don't play fair." Stated Celestia as she trotted over to her sister's cabinet.

"WHAT"RE YOU DOING!?" Screamed Luna.

Celestia smirked, "I'm going to eat your cookies.

"NO!" Panicked Luna, "I'M SAVING THOSE!"

Celestia opened the drawer, picked up the cookie bag, and grinned, "I think I will."

"NOOOOOOOOO!"

Celestia ate the 5 cookies in the bag.

"YOU'RE MEAN TIA!"

"And PROUD of it." Declared Celestia. "Now it's time for your bath."

"BUT I HATE BATHS!" Cried Luna.

"And I hate babysitting." Argued Celestia.

Celestia Placed Luna in cold water, picked up a brush and roughly scrubbed her little sister.

"OW!" Luna began crying, "Not so hard! Ow! PLEASE!"

"I'm left to babysit you, what're YOU complaining about?" Asked Celestia, "Next time don't be such a little brat."

It was a long and painful bath but it ended and Celestia levitated Luna to her bedroom (without drying) and plopped her in her bed.

"Now go to bed." Ordered Celestia.

"But it's not my bedtime." Reasoned Luna.

"I'm the big sister and what I say GOES." Argued Celestia who turned out the lights and slammed the door.

Luna began to cry. "Celestia is so mean."

Inside Luna's head we see a dark alicorn filly smile menacingly.

"Soon I will have control. MWAHAHAHAHA!"

THE END

Spitfire Gets It

Spitfire was sitting in her office doing her favorite part of her job, avoiding responsibility. She was sleeping at her desk when her mother and Celestia came in and woke her up.

Spitfire was tapped on her shoulder, she looked up and saw them, "What's up?"
Spitfire was dragged right out of her seat by Celestia and slammed up against the wall.

"I AM SICK AND TIRED OF YOUR CRUEL ATTITUDE!" Canterlot voiced Celestia.

"Me too!" Scolded Spit's mother, "Have I taught you NOTHING!"

Spitfire was scared and confused now, "What're you talking about?"

"DON'T GIVE ME THAT!" Screamed Celestia, then took a few breaths and calmly (but still angrily) said, "Ever since you became the leader of the Wonderbolts you let in anypony who asked, badly injured civilians, and now you give out punishments to those who don't take your abuse!"

"I...don't know what you're talking about." Said Spitfire.

Celestia threw Spitfire across the floor, "You're hereby dishonorably discharged from the Wonderbolts."

"WHAT!?" Screamed Spitfire.

Spitfire's mom came in, "When I retired from being the Wonderbolt's leader I made you the new leader in hopes of teaching you responsibility, but now I see that all you and your school gang care about is showing off how "awesome" you are but actually avoid doing what you're meant to do." Spit's mom began bring out tears, "When you were in school you, Lightning Dust, and Soarin started a gang where you mercilessly bullied everypony you possibly could."
Spit's mom couldn't hold it in anymore and cried, "Where did I go wrong?"

Later Soarin and Fleetfoot were also dishonorably discharged, every Wonderbolt member had to go back to the academy to see if they truly were Wonderbolts material.

THE END

Author's Note

What can I say? Spitfire almost gets the mane six killed because she thinks being evil is a good thing.