Equestrian Idiot

by SilverFlare11

Rating: teen
Tags: Drama, Original Character, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Alternate Universe, Other, Sex, Random, Adventure
Length: 2708

Based on the popular rock opera album "American Idiot". A young pony doesn't want to be labeled as another Equestrian Idiot, so he leaves his hometown in search of adventure.

Equestria. Just another run-of-the-mill land in this young pony's eyes. He's grown tired of trying to live up to society's norms, or, as he likes to call it, living up to the reputation of an "Equestrian Idiot". His hometown suburbia of Los Pegasus has a lot of memories for him, but all of his friends are becoming lost in their own dreams and lives, and he feels as though it's time for him to see what else that Equestria has to offer outside of his town that's he's grown tired of.

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This whole story is based upon Green Day's seventh studio album, "American Idiot". While there was a stage production of the album, that stage production also include songs from their eighth studio album, "21st Century Breakdown". There is a central story based around the entirety of the album's own "rock opera" style, following Jesus of Suburbia, but this is my own take on it, with my own depictions of the lyrics here in these chapters.

Just a small disclaimer; I obviously will not have any copyrighted lyrics in this story. Green Day owns the album that this story is based upon. I will leave external links to YouTube videos of the songs so that you can listen to the song that the chapter in question is based on(the chapters will be named accordingly).

Published 2016-03-21 03:50:02 UTC
Last updated 2016-12-30 07:07:21 UTC

Chapter 1-Equestrian Idiot

Author's Note

Here is a link to the very first song of the album, the titular song as well as the titular song of both this story and chapter, slightly modified of course. "American Idiot" by Green Day: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a1BS7XnEZqc

Chapter 1-Equestrian Idiot

Equestria.

Just this one simple word alone is enough to describe so much more than just one land filled with ponies, griffons, and many other creatures, all of which are so unique in ways that nopony could ever describe. It could describe magic, it could describe the many cities, towns and villages in which all creatures lived in harmony with the occasional turbulent event, and it could even describe the development of much, much more than just a nation; it could describe the creation of perfect harmony, a statute system of rule, and the freedom of all who dwelled within.

And yet... it was also a word that meant very little or even nothing to some ponies. Some ponies heard it as a word that only told of their hometown that they'd grown tired of. Others heard it as a word and were reminded of all of the painful things that had befallen them throughout their lives. And some ponies... they heard the word and thought of the land of Equestria, but not as the magical, harmonic land that everypony said that it was. They saw it as just another run-of-the-mill land with no special qualities or advantages over any other place in the entire world.

This was the case for a teenaged pony in Los Pegasus. Born and raised in the slightly lower income part of the suburbs, he still had a decent life and a decent roof over his head, as well as plenty to eat and a good mother who treated him well. His father had been absent for as long as he could remember, but that didn't matter to him. He had his friends to fill in for that gap in his life. Oftentimes, the navy blue unicorn would sit on the front steps of his home, playing his guitar and singing as his grey mane waved with each small movement of his head, keeping time with his own music. Sometimes he would also go to popular street corners and play there with his guitar's case open for passerby ponies to drop a Bit or two in if they felt like doing so. He was both famous and infamous around the city for both his music and singing and his tendency to sit outside of thrift stores in the hood and the slums with some of his friends, doing next to nothing but smoking cigarettes.

This pony's name was Derek Beauregard. Seventeen years of age and very close to finishing out his last year of schooling, he was not much more than a pony with a musical talent and not much less than a pony with an addiction to nicotine. At this moment in time, he was sitting on the front steps of the school with his prized guitar in his hooves, plucking the strings with his guitar pick as he tuned the instrument. The first group of students had been sent to their lunch break, and Derek was among these students. What he was doing at the moment was a part of his daily routine; every day at school, he'd eat his lunch, then go outside and sit on the front steps of the school for a smoke and play his guitar. He got the instrument tuned and strummed a few random chords to make sure it was properly tuned before starting to play the riffs from songs that he knew, lighting a cigarette with his magic as he did so. He puffed on it a few times without removing it from his lips and kept playing his guitar, catching the attention of a few bystander ponies.

"Hey! Derek!" one of them yelled. "Put out that cigarette! Remember what the principal said he would do if he caught you with another one?" Derek looked up and took the smoke out from between his lips, having taken a long drag on it. He blew the smoke out his nostrils, looking at the student.

"I'm a senior at this school, bro," Derek replied. "There's a week and a half left 'til school's over. I don't give a flying fuck if I get in trouble for smoking a damn cigarette on school grounds. Seriously, it's not like those dumb assholes on the southeast side of the school who sit there and smoke weed all lunch break. Honestly, this school's logic is fucking dumb sometimes." He took another drag on his cigarette, and as he brought it away from his mouth again it was enveloped in a magical aura that wasn't his own. He looked behind him and saw the principal of his school, who hovered the small tobacco product over and set it on the ground, stepping on it and crushing it under his hoof.

"Derek, how many times do I have to tell you?" the principal said, shaking his head. "No smoking on school grounds." Derek just shrugged.

"Whatever," he said nonchalantly.

"Get in my office," the principal said. "Now." Derek sighed and got up.

"I think I'll just save you the trouble of having to reprimand me and calling my mother by leaving," Derek replied. "Don't matter anyway; you're just gonna send me home after all this is said and done. I'll be back tomorrow." He walked down the steps, and as he stepped off the final one, the principal sighed.

"Alright, alright," the principal said. "I'll let it go this time, since it's so close to the end of the year. Besides, I won't have to deal with you much longer anyway, you're graduating."

"Damn right you don't have to deal with me," Derek said. "And I don't have to deal with seein' that ugly mug of yours anymore either." Some of the students at the bottom of the stairs burst out in laughter while the principal just sighed and walked back to the doors of the school.

"'Ey, Derek!" a voice yelled from across the lot in front of the school. Derek looked out into the street and saw his good friend, Hood, who was as usual clad in his green hooded jacket and flat brim snapback hat which covered up his jet black body and maroon mane. Derek smirked as Hood walked over to the steps and the two brohoofed.

"'Sup, homie?" Derek greeted him. "What you doin' here? I thought you dropped outta school last month, dog."

"I know, man, but that ain't gonna stop me from comin' and seein' my homies here," Hood replied. "'Sides, I ain't got nothin' better to do anyway."

"True enough," Derek agreed. "Yo, you want a smoke?"

"Hell yeah, dude," Hood said, "pass that shit over here." Derek pulled out the pack of cigarettes he always carried in his front left brace on his left foreleg and hoofed it to Hood, who took one and lit it before giving the pack back to Derek. As Derek took the pack of smokes back, he noticed that Hood's hoof was shaking uncontrollably.

"Hey, you good man?" Derek asked. "You're shakin' like fucking hell."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm good," Hood replied, dragging on his cigarette. "Just rough shit at home, y'know." Derek wanted to believe him, but he never remembered Hood ever telling him that he'd dropped out of school nor did he remember Hood's family or home life ever being "rough".

"Don't try and play me, dog," Derek told him, "what's really goin' on?" Hood looked at him.

"Man, I ain't tryin' to play you," Hood responded. "I'm just here to hang out wit' you, ya crazy guitar-playin' unicorn." Derek raised an eyebrow.

"Somethin's up, man," Derek said. He was about to ask what really was the problem when the bell rang, signifying the end of lunch. "Shit. Hey, I'll meet up with you after school, bro. Usual spot. Sound good?"

"Yeah," Hood responded as the two brohoofed. "I'll holla at ya later." Derek nodded and walked back up the steps and into the school, and Hood watched him go before leaving himself, walking back down the street.

School let out at around 3:30, so Derek made his way through the rest of his afternoon classes, barely caring enough to even look up at the board in any of them. Once the final bell of the day rang, Derek gathered his things and left the school, heading for the spot he'd told Hood he'd meet up with him. Something seemed... off. Derek had known Hood all his life, but he'd never seen Hood acting like this, nor did he ever catch Hood lying to him. And yet... he was now. And this threw Derek for a completely new loop.

It took him a few minutes, but he reached the local hangout; it was the corner drugstore just two blocks down the street from Derek's house. He saw Hood sitting near the front steps and yelled out to him, and Hood looked over, smirking.

"What's crackin'?" Derek asked as he walked up and sat down beside his friend.

"Eh, not much, man," Hood replied. "Just chillin' out like usual, y'know."

"Yeah, I gotcha," Derek said as he pulled out his pack of cigarettes. "Smoke?"

"Aw, hell bro, you don't need to ask," Hood replied as he slid one out of the pack. "You know me." Derek smirked.

"Yeah, I do," Derek said as he lit one of his own and then Hood's. "At least I think I do. Now what the hell was going on with you, showin' up to school like that? Did you drop out, or are you lyin' to me?"

"I didn't drop out, man. I just stopped going."

"Why? We're so close to gettin' out of this town, dude."

"'Cause I'm sick and tired of the fuckwits there, man. Always pushin' me around, callin' me names and shit, beating me up..."

"So? I was always there for you. I bailed you out plenty of times. Shoulda just stuck with it, dude. Now quit playin' me. Your family ain't rough and your home life ain't either. Stop making me feel like a damn fool." Hood sighed.

"I can't tell you my plan, dude."

"The fuck you can't. I ain't gonna be another Equestrian idiot. So you fuckin' tell me or I'm goin' home."

"Fine then, homie. Go run home and I'll see you tomorrow, 'cause I ain't tellin' ya what's going on."

"Fine, but don't come runnin' to me if the cops come down on ya. 'Cause I ain't dealing with that fuckin' shit, and don't bring that anywhere near my mom or me. We've got enough problems as it is." He started walking away, but Hood finally caved in.

"Alright, alright, fine," Hood said, sighing heavily. "Look, man, it's like this. I'm plannin' something big. Huge." Derek turned around.

"Like what kind of big you talkin'?" Derek asked.

"Like ponies are gonna die big," Hood replied.

This hit Derek like a stack of bricks. Hood had never been violent towards anypony ever before except for when he needed to be. And now he was talking about... murdering other ponies?

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, hold up a second," Derek said. "What in the fuck you plannin' on doing anyway? You going to kill other ponies or some shit? Because if you are, you definitely stay the fuck away from me."

"You don't tell me to stay the fuck away from you! I wanted you to help me, homie. Takin' revenge on anyone and everyone that's wronged us."

"What the fuck you even talkin' about? Everyone who's wronged us? The ponies that wronged us are dumb fucking shits and we should just forget about 'em when we get the fuck out of this damn city."

"I can't forget about 'em, Derek. It just doesn't work like that man. Not with me. You might be able to get the fuck outta here and get on with your life, but me... I'm stuck here. I can't do jack fucking shit about getting out of this town because I got no fuckin' money. And I gotta live in this place with those little cocksuckers and I ain't gonna do that."

"Fuckin' come with me! I ain't got anywhere in particular I wanna go, I just wanna get the fuck out of here!"

"So do I, man, but I can't fuckin' leave."

"Fine then, you little bitch! If you're too fuckin' afraid to come with me away from this fucking place, then you can stay here and rot in this fucking hood! Go kill your fucking enemies; I don't give a fuck. I ain't gonna be another fucking Equestrian idiot, livin' up to society's so called 'norms' and being ignorant to all the shit that's going down. So I'm gonna go and tell the cops about your little plot before you can start it." Hood looked at Derek.

"You ain't goin' to the cops," Hood said. "And it's because you ain't gonna live that long, bitch."

Hood then pulled a sharp knife out of his jacket and slashed at Derek. Derek blocked the slash, which had been aimed at his chest, with his hoof. He knocked away the knife and head-butted Hood in the face, causing him to become disoriented for a few moments as Derek grabbed the knife off of the ground with his magic. He was about to toss it away when Hood knocked Derek down, making him drop the knife. Derek got back up, but at this point, Hood had run off, presumably to hide somewhere.

"FUCK YOU, HOOD!" Derek screamed, holding his injured hoof. "I THOUGHT WE WERE FUCKING FRIENDS, YOU DICK!!!" He then limped away from the drugstore and to the police station, which was only a few blocks away. As he entered the building, the attendant at the front desk looked up at him and lifted his eyebrow.

"Can I help you?" the cop asked.

"Yeah, you can," Derek said. "One of my friends went insane today; he's talking about going around and killin' ponies that 'wronged him' or some shit and I don't want anypony gettin' hurt."

"Alright, can you give me some details about the party in question so we can investigate and keep an eye out for him?" the cop asked, his eyes becoming completely serious as he hovered a pencil over a piece of paper.

"Yeah," Derek said. "He's completely jet black with a red mane, usually wears a green hoodie and a flat bill snapback. He's about my height, large build, pretty burly." The cop made notes of all of these things.

"And who would be his targets?" the cop inquired. "And where would these ponies most likely be found?"

"Most of 'em would probably be schoolmates of ours," Derek said. "School's not in session tomorrow so they'd be scattered around town; a lot of 'em hang out at the local drugstores and the library." The cop nodded and made notes of these places.

"Thank you for the tip, sir," the cop said. "I'll make a case file on this right away and put out police units near the library and a few of the drugstores as soon as I can."

"Good," Derek said. "Because if he does get on his rampage, you can't say I didn't warn you." Derek turned and walked out of the station while the cop walked into the back, immediately alerting other officers of what Derek had just told him.

Derek just walked home after this. So many things were going through his mind; he felt lightheaded from the loss of blood from the slash on his hoof, which was bleeding profusely. But he could still form coherent thoughts; why now? Why would Hood do this? What could've driven him to this point?

And why now?

Derek didn't give a shit though; he'd done all he could. He'd tried to convince Hood not to do what he was going to do, and now he'd told the cops so that nopony innocent would get hurt. There wasn't anything else he could do now.

But he definitely wasn't an Equestrian idiot.

Chapter 2-Celestia of Suburbia

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