This is a dumb plan. Without a doubt the dumbest thing I have ever come up with. It relied on insane troll logic to work. It was crazy.

Crazy enough to work? Maybe... But Probably fucking not.

Haze looked at what I handed him before staring blankly back at me. The mist was now purple. Never seen that one before, but I'll assume that’s annoyance.

"And I have to wear this because...", he asked while fiddling with the fake cat ears I just drew.

"To not be a person."

And he only blankly stared at me. Like I was the idiot.

"What?"

"Well, I'm going to draw something. Now keep in mind I have never done this before, but I'm going to draw something alive."

"Why?"

"Because... Reasons okay."

It's starting to cease to amuse me.

"Look, I'm going to draw something that will attack Noir over there, but not the ponies. Yes this is dumb, but I have reason to think it will work."

"And the cat ears?"

"This thing only eats people, not cat people.."

"...Eats."

"Yep."

"Okay, I'm going to go along with this... But I think it's really stupid. And if it fails, I'm going to hold you accountable, not one last question."

Noted.

"Yeah?"

"Why do I have to wear fake cat ears... And you get fake alien antenna?"

Because cat people are stupid.

"Because reasons."

It amuses me again.

Haze glared at me before slipping on the fake ears.

"I hate you so much right now."

And like that he watched as I began to draw.

So, how do you take out a human, but nothing else. Well, I knew of one thing and one thing only that could help.

I started to draw. stepping into the role of creator for the first time. I really have no idea if this is a good idea. Will this make me the creator... or destroyer.

Why am I drawing this thing... I could swear I convinced myself that was the dumbest things I could do.

I guess that desperate times call for desperate measures, but... No, I better just get started before I get seen.

First was the eye, there was only one, I made it vaguely reptilian in appearance, with a few veins for that general crazy look. The maw of razor sharp teeth resembled a dragons mouth... Somewhat, but much wider.

A single horn on it's head, like a curved unicorn horn, similar to what Sombra had only a bit longer and with a serrated edge.

Next came the body, which was somewhat humanoid, but with scales. Arms were slightly longer than they needed to be, a row of spikes going down the side of the forearm and each finger was tipped with foot long bone like talons.

I drew it with some dragon-like wings that were a bit small, but not too much, and definitely not as small compared to the rest of it as a pegasi.

Legs were dog-like, with Raptor feet. Finally the tail, very long and whip-like. Several rows of spines down it's back, kinda like an iguana.

All in all, it looked like a stubby dragon with the head of a Beholder minus the extra eyes. I liked it.

Next came the shading. I fiddled with the fake antenna on my head as I shaded him carefully, and watched as he took on a purple color.

Didn't take too long, I'd say about ten minutes before I finished the damn thing.

I looked at my creation in all it's glory as it

It's red eye blinked for the first time and it stared at me with a quirked head.

"Da-da?"

...Sure, Why the hell not.

"Ummmm... Hi son."

The thing looked to Haze and hissed a bit. However it still looked... Confused.

Thick purple drool fell from it's maw like Purple Rain...I think I'll name him Prince.

"Your name is Prince."

He growled a bit. Before squeaking and smiling.

"Prince! I likey!"

My god that was adorable... In the strangest possible way.

Prince turned from me, to Haze before quirking his adorably over-sized head and pointed at Haze.

"Num num?"

"What the hell!", said Haze as he took a step back.

"No, not num num."

I pointed to the group of ponies, where Noir would be.

"There is a person that way, he is num num."

A long tongue resembling a squids tentacle licked it's teeth.

"Yum Yum!"

Then it flew off. Haze watched it for but a moment before turning to me.

"Sketch... What the hell did you just draw?"

I shrugged.

"Just a one eyed one horned flying purple people eater."

So I watched as... what was apparently my son flew over the ponies towards Noir, who took one look at the thing, and fell flat on his ass.

"Wop bop a lula wop bam boom!", screamed Prince as he swooped down over Noir.

"WHAT THE HELL!", screamed Noir as he kicked at Prince.

Prince grabbed Noirs leg and jerked at it, until the other leg hit him Prince at his hand.

"OWCHY!", said Prince as he put his hand in his mouth.

...Oh no he did not just kick my son.

I stood up as Haze took off towards the Princesses, who were glaring at Prince. In fact, all ponies were glaring at Prince, and each one looked pissed.

A flash of purple light was flung from within the crowd, and I could see Twilight among the crowd. As expected, the magic had no effect.

Hundreds of ponies went after Prince, who took to the skies, not Twilight, nope she began looking around.

"Sketch, I know you are here. You are the only one who could have made a magically resistant monster."

Damn autistic alicorn and her logic... And shame on her for calling Price a monster... He's adorable... Then again I thought the gremlins that ate after midnight were cute too so maybe I can't be the best judge on that one.

Now back to the situation at hand, I would go out there, without fear too considering my magic immunity... But that's Twilight Sparkle. I may be immune to magic, but if anyone wouldn't be inconvenienced by that... it's her.

Where the hell is Haze anyway?

It's not easy to see anything with this stampede of various ponies going after a one eyed one horned flying purple people eater... My god my life is weird as all hell since I got here. Either way, I'm not sticking my head out to the mind controlled alicorn with Doctor Strange level magic powers and the intellect of Sherlock Holmes. I'm not that stupid.

Still, I needed to see if Haze had made it to at least one of the princesses. So maybe I am that stupid.

So I stick my head out a bit more to watch the chaos and I see Haze foot it towards Celestia. His mist was yellow green... not exactly angry.

"Found you!"

Shit.

So Twilight sees me and takes to the skies... I was under the impression that at this point, seeing that she is still has the damn library tree, that she wasn't so god at flying, decent maybe, but she took off like a damn jet.

So I do the only sensible thing and cheese it.

I have no idea if she is following me, readying to fire magic missile, or whatever, but I do know that I am not looking behind me. So I run toward Haze, who...

Haze just jumped on Celestia’s back...

I actually stop for a moment to comprehend the event before me. Haze is holding around Celestia, Legs hooked around her wings, and arms around her neck as Celestia bucks like this is the goddamn rodeo.

And then what I can only assume was 400 pounds of purple alicorn crashes into me. I really don't know how much Twilight weights, but based on what I just felt, I would say that’s about right...

Oh and OW!

Then the pain vanishes. Like it always does...

That’s right, pain here is temporary for me. How the hell did I forget that?

So I'm face first in the dirt, chaos all around me, and I hear Twilight breathing heavily.

"Stay still."

Yeah...No.

"The Buck!"

I ignore Twilight... I really do hesitate to call it a curse. I know cursing, I watch Lewis Black, Louis C.K. and George Carlin, that is not cursing... but I digress. I put my palms to the ground, and push up. My vision is filled with black spots as I slowly... Really slowly because damn what does this pony eat?

Eventually I roll to the side, and without hands or... Well without the power of grasping like a human would have, Twilight slips right off... It's at this point I realize the spots filling my vision is not my own distorted vision, no... It's ink.

The ground is dark, pitch black and it's dripping upwards very slowly. Now that I can actually see what is going on around me, I can see that a portal has appeared before me, a very small portal, so small that I couldn't fit through it. My arms maybe, but not the rest of me, and I can see Haze on the other side, and the portal seems to be following him because Celestia was still bucking.

"SKETCH!", said Haze surprised, but it was all he said as he gripped Celestia tighter.

I notice now that his mist is leaking out of the portal, and it's yellow... Fucking yellow.

As such, Celestia looks scared as all hell. Well at least it looks like this will work.

"What are you doing, get angry!"

"HOW!"

Really good question.

Before I could say anything, Twilight gets back on her hooves and snorts angrily.

"I'm going to enjoy this."

Well... Shit.

Now magic doesn't work on me, but indirectly, well Discord proved that it works just fine that way. For example when I saw Twilight lift a house... I repeat A FUCKING HOUSE... and slowly move it towards me... Well I realized I was pretty much screwed.

I scramble to my feet, and the portal follows me, only for the house to quickly be FUCKING TELEPORTED OVER ME... And fall at a speed that it should not have fallen at it's current height and...

ERROR

"I'm going to enjoy this."

The FUCK!

I watch as Twilight lifts the house that slowly moves over to me... again... I scramble to my feet...again... and the portal follows me... again... only for the house to quickly be teleported over me... Again... And fall at a speed that it should not have fallen at it's current height and...

ERROR

"I'm going to enjoy this."

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON!

The house moves over me, and this time I try rolling out the way... Only for the house to teleport over me again and...

ERROR

"I'm going to enjoy this."

Is this what death is like. Do you just live it over and over again just to hammer in the point that you can't do anything about it.

The house slowly moved towards me.

I look to the portal and see Haze on the ground and staring around him seemingly confused.

"What the fuck."

Wait did Haze...

ERROR

"I'm going to enjoy this."

FUCK EVERYTHING!

I pull out my pen, prepare to draw...

"Sketch... WHAT IS GOING ON!", screams Haze as the house teleports over me and...

ERROR

ERROR

ERROR

ERROR

...I lay down as the house slowly drifts towards me as I look to the portal.

You know dying over and over again can surprisingly enough get really old, really fast. My arms are crossed as I look to the portal to Haze who seems resigned. He glances at me, still holding onto Celestia, something he seems to have become an expert at considering how he can looked bored while doing it.

He focuses his eyes on mine.

"So, know any jokes?", he asks.

ERROR

ERROR

ERROR

ERROR

ERROR

ERROR

ERROR...ERROR...ERROR

...I lay down as the house slowly drifts towards me as I look to the portal.

"...So the guy agrees to go to the nursing home for two weeks like his daughter suggested, anyway he's taking a bath and the nurse bends down and starts blowing him..."

ERROR

...I lay down as the house slowly drifts towards me as I look to the portal.

"...He calls his daughter and says he wants to stay in the nursing home..."

ERROR

...I lay down as the house slowly drifts towards me as I look to the portal.

"...The Next day he falls down and the orderly sees him helpless, pulls down his pants and starts fucking him in the ass..."

ERROR

...I lay down as the house slowly drifts towards me as I look to the portal.

"...So he calls his daughter again and says 'You got to get me the fuck out of here'..."

ERROR

...I lay down as the house slowly drifts towards me as I look to the portal.

"...She asks why, and he says, 'Because, I take a bath twice a week, I fall down thirteen times day..."

ERROR

...I lay down as the house slowly drifts towards me as I look to the portal.

Haze laughs at the dirty joke we have been telling through this stupid ass time loop.

"Well that's the last dirty joke I know..."

ERROR

...I lay down as the house slowly drifts towards me as I look to the portal.... Damn this is fucking stupid.

"Yeah, I got no more either.", said Haze.

ERROR

...I lay down and cross my arms irritably as the house drifts over me and I sigh.

"This is really fucking stupid..."

ERROR

"Well, what haven't you tried?"

"At this point, nothing much... I lost count, how many times have I been crushed by a house?"

ERROR

Haze shrugged.

"Yeah me to, you know, I just realized every time I fall off Celestia it only hurts for like a second..."

ERROR

"... Then it vanishes right before the loop starts."

"Yeah, same here..."

ERROR

"This is really stupid."

Haze nods as he looks to the house.

"Damn thing falls to fast."

I blink... Wait a minute.

ERROR

"I'm going to enjoy this."

I blink as I watch the house Drift over to me...I pulled out my pen in such a way that Twilight wouldn't be able to see, I draw an anvil, a very small anvil, about the size of a golf ball. Then I pluck one of my hairs and hold each one to my side. I wait for the house to get just over me and I drop both. Everything falls slower than an anvil.

"The Buck!"

I get on my hands and knees as I start to crawl, each moment pulling a hair and releasing it, the house is falling at a slow speed, but only as fast as my hair can fall. After all, it has to fall slower than the anvil, which has to fall slower than the hair.

Discord did say that it only works when the thing falling is alive, the feather was him cheating, but... Well the skin cells on that hair was still alive... Looks like it counts. Good to know.

Finally I get out from under the house, and only a second later it hits the ground. Sending debris up into the air. I smile as I look to Haze, who is still holding onto Celestia for dear life.

"Sketch... You are starting to annoy me."

I turn to Twilight whose heart shaped pupils are glaring at me with fury. something hits her on the head.

She blinks as a very tiny anvil falls off of her and hits the ground.

She stares at it for a second before I turn back to the portal to see Haze still holding on. Yellow mist. His mist is still fucking yellow.

Great, now I have to make him angry. How to make him angry? There has to be something I can... Wait a minute.

"HEY TERRA! Ruined anyone else's lives recently"

"DO NOT CALL ME THAT!"

The mist turns red, and Celestia stops bucking as she and Haze glare at me.

You know, I don't think I fully though this through.

"Oh good your angry."

He narrows his eyes, and even though I can't see Celestia, her wings just twitched.

"No fuck you Terra, you useless bag of shit. You want to do something useful, kill Noir or something you manipulative misanthropic anti-human fuck!"

Jesus Christ that was mean.

Haze blinks at that, before he looks down, presumably to Celestia, and smiles.

I can practically hear his brain click.

"Fine... Asshole."

"Puppet boy."

The portal drips away, and I sigh as I hear a Sonic Boom as Haze takes off still on Celestia's back.

I feel like I'm forgetting something... Something important...

"SKETCH!"

...Right Twilight... I don't think that was it, but yeah I probably should focus on that.

I turn around to see Twilight glaring at me as she motions like she is ready to charge.

"You. Ruined. EVERYTHING!"

"For the sake of something to write on my grave... What did I ruin?"

Twilight's face fell as she turned to see Noir and a group of ponies fighting Prince...

"You are trying to Kill Noir... What did he ever do to you anyway?"

I would say something, but I figure the best thing to do is to cheese it, so I run.

I book it away from Twilight going towards the displaced house and sprint around it to see Celestia fighting like a damn monster as she kicks Noir in the face.

"You cheating Bastard!", she screamed.

Not quite what I had in mind, but sure why not.

Still, I could really use the help. So I take a deep Breath, put my hands to my mouth and Yell.

"PRINCE!"

The One Eyed One Horned Flying Purple People Eater turns to me as I turn around to see Twilight flying toward me.

"Wop bop a lula wop bam boom!", roars Prince as he takes off towards me.

Twilight is grabbed midair by Prince who takes off with her to god knows where as I take off to Haze, who looks pissed. So does Celestia.

"What! Am I not good enough for you is that it?"

Really pissed.

"Wait Celly, please listen.", said Noir as Celestia starts to charge her horn with the power of the fucking sun... and then Luna barrels into her like a torpedo.

Huh, there goes Haze. At least the mist is still red.

"Who the hell are you?"

I turn to look at Noir and scratch my head.

"Sketch, call me Sketch... So you're the Black Hole Sue."

Noir Blinks.

"Black Hole what?"

"Sorry, I read TV Tropes, but have you noticed that everything here is Ponyville?"

Noir looks around, to his sides as his army of swooning ponies simply stare at him with hearts in their eyes, literally, before looking up.

"I assume that that was just magic being strange."

"Nope all you."

Noir crosses his arms and hums before glancing back at me. Looks like he's willing to talk... Good.

"Well Sketch, I am Noir Gate! If you don't mind me asking how did you get here anyway, did that guy come to you to?"

I blink. Ok, first of all, Gate is another word for door, which can be considered a hole. Noir means black. In other words, is name quite literally means Black Hole... Second, and more importantly... What guy?

"What guy?"

Noir puts his palm to his chin.

"Don't know, just a guy. Goat looking man with a raspy voice. I met him at a con, he said I could have all my dreams come true in exchange for doing a certain never coming back."

Wonder if that is the Merchant again. Seriously, what is this guy.

"Well Noir, hate to tell you this, but humans here are Cthulhu, you in fact have destroyed science and turned all of Ponyville into an event horizon that none may escape from, in addition I don't know if you noticed this, but everyone is kind of under mind control."

Noir glances to the ponies, a look of longing on his face.

"Cthulhu... the squid guy... I don't get it."

I see someone is only aware of Cthulhu through Pop-culture osmosis.

"Basically we don't conform to their laws of physics as we should and our being here causes effects to reality or ponies mentality for whatever reason."

Noir looked to his feet.

"I didn't want to hurt anyone, I just... Everyone I know talks behind my back about how much I like the show and how I feel about the ponies... I know it freaks them out but... that’s how I feel."

"Well that's all well and good, but you're really messing with reality here, to the point that anything that enters Ponyville can't leave, because suddenly everything is Ponyville. I watched hundreds of mind controlled ponies march this way from Canterlot, who knows if this is happening everywhere else."

"Can I... Can I do anything about it?"

I opened my mouth... Only to snap it shut.

Huh, I expected another fight like with Anonymous and Terra. This guy seems more... Naive than anything else. Not malevolent, just... stupid. I would say thoughtless, but... How is it he didn't notice the mind control going on here. They were worshiping him. Dudes got some fucked up priorities.

"Not sure, you could try."

"How?"

"I don't know, how does Spiderman shoot webs, experiment, try and see if you can shut it off or something.

He looked around and just kind of grunted. I looked around at the many swooning ponies, Haze atop Celestia fighting Luna, and Prince being kicked by Twilight, and realized that this situation may have gotten out of hand.

Looks like I need to stop this... Hope Prince isn't hungry.

ERROR
TROUBLESHOOTING...

TROUBLESHOOTING COMPLETE

...What was I doing?

"Wop bop a lula wop bam boom!", screamed Prince as he slams his tail into the ground where Twilight once stood.

Oh right... I should stop this fighting.

"Who the hell are you?"

I blink before turning back to Noir who is glaring at me.

"What?"

"I asked who are you?"

"Sketch..."

I'm beyond confused at this point, not sure why he just asked that considering we did just talk this out.

I watch as Noir hold his hand outward to his side as a black... mass grows above his palm.

"Well Sketch, I don't know how you got here, but I am going to take you out."

...

What?

Why is he suddenly a giant asshole?

Well I don't have much time to think on it, because I'm fairly certain that that is a black hole in the palm of his hand. How? I have no idea.

The mass of ponies around me narrow their eyes and I swallow the growing bile in my stomach hard.

And then the Black Hole dissipates into nothing.

Not quite what I expected, but sure why not.

Then, as I am reaching for my pen, Noir takes to the skies and the ponies around me start to take slow, deliberate steps towards me. Each and every one of them glaring at me like I was the worst thing they had ever seen.

This... is not good.

Noir, who is fucking flying points at me, before snapping his finger.

"Get him!"

And now stampede.

Well, I do the only sensible thing after that change of heart, and... I can't run.

I'm surrounded on all sides by ponies who all look like they want me very much dead.

At this point, I am more than a little aware of just how fucked I am, as I run towards the charging ponies. I really wish I knew how the portals worked because this is without a doubt the stupidest thing I have ever done, and all I could think of was how much I wanted to not be here right now, how much I have never wanted to be here and... I am not in the stampede any more.

I blink as I watch Twilight throw stones at Prince, and I can't help but notice that behind me is an ink portal.

I can't help but wonder how I did that. All I was dong was thinking how much I didn't want to be there... Is that it, I have to want to really be somewhere else for the portal to show... No, that doesn't seem right. When it first showed up, I was about to sneak into Ponyville and try and avoid being spotted before it showed up right where I wanted to go... The second time I was stuck in the wagon, and once again arrived at my destination.

Unconsciously I reach towards the portal, which has started to melt. I didn't do so for any reason, just a feeling that I should do this, and as a result I watch as the ink seems to flow in the air a bit.

I jerk my arm back and watch as the ink just falls unceremoniously to the ground like it usually does.

Where did this come from?

Well no time to worry about that, I reach down, preparing to do get my pen to help Prince, when my hand suddenly feels very wet.

Looking down I watch as the ground below me slowly turns black and globules of ink fly to my hand and completely cover it. Inky tendrils form and flow around my palm before they disappear into the ink. Large and irregular puddles of ink form around me and rise into the air to orbit me.

I don't even have time to question it as I hear the sound of thunder which causes two things to happen, first I flinch at the loudness of the sound, second, and far more importantly I notice that the entire town is filling with red mist.

I look around, memories of Terra flooding my mind when I see Celestia and Luna have stopped fighting, so has Twilight and Prince, who seems very confused at the mist growing around him.

I blink as the mist before me becomes denser and denser before with a pop, Haze is standing before me, looking very confused.

"What the hell?"

My thoughts exactly.

Haze glances at me, watching the swirling ink orbiting around me and collecting on my hand as He looks at the mist around him.

"What's going on Sketch? Last thing I remember, Luna did... Something. I was hit by a bolt of lightning. Now....", he motions to his arm which is now only partially mist-like.

I felt like I was squirming in my own skin and Haze looked equally as uncomfortable at this sudden unexpected change.

Have you ever felt really uncomfortable but you had no idea why. I felt like that right now, and from what I was seeing, so did Haze.

You know, with that stupid time loop, Noirs change of heart, and now this... today has been a very strange day. What even was happening here, and why did it seem so familiar. I feel like I have been here before... wait.

The loss of memory... Why did I brush it away so casually, that stuff doesn't just happen... Discord did say something about cuts in time. I mean sure this was a loop, but still it was time acting strange.

What could have caused it.

I remember thinking something... Something about... Wait a minute, why are humans like Cthulhu?

Yeah that was it, it seems like a logical question to ask. I mean between me, Anonymous, Haze, and Noir some very strange reality breaking stuff has occurred over the past few days. That... Just doesn't happen.

Sure, different laws of physics and all that, but...

I have thought this before...

I remember thinking this before...

Wait one goddamn minute.

I'm....

ERROR

I found myself in a space of infinite whiteness, nothing on all sides of me. No up, no down, no left, no right... hell for all I knew I wasn't standing on anything. It truly was the single most nothingyest nothing that ever not existed... And it was BOOOOOOOOOOORING!

What the hell was going on?

"I see you made it."

I turned to... I think it's to the right, but I can't be sure, either way I turn and see Discord of all things just kind of standing off to the side with a smile on his face and a pocket watch in his paws. He gives the watch an appraising look before turning to face me.

"Right on time."

I looked around at the infinite nothing, before I stare at Discord. I can only stare at Discord for a moment before... Oh Shit! I remember it now, I remember fucking EVERYTHING, holy hell I remember everything. I am a character... In a fucking fanfic. Discord rose a brow as I did the only sensible thing and panicked.

Panicked being a relative term for now being on my knees with wide eyes and speaking in that insane babbling you hear from crazy people. I felt it was justified.

I screamed as I looked around myself at the infinite nothing and I shuffled around in fear and paranoia like I have never known. Was anything I did myself? Were my thoughts my own? Hell do I even exist or am I just words on a page?

Discord sighed.

"Are you done?"

"How are you taking this so calmly, we're puppets, controlled by some dude at a computer."

Discord shrugged.

"I'm not panicking, because the author has decided I'm not going to panic. Everything happening is being controlled by him, everything. You panicking, that’s the author, what I'm saying now, still the author, even you realizing that this is a story being written, the author. Nothing you or I do can stop it. We can do nothing but follow the story, not a single action we make is our own. Even how you react is under his control."

I... stood up feeling calm. Really calm.

"You now being calm, that’s the author."

I felt fear, true fear, terror like I never imagined it to be.

"You being afraid, will of the author."

Now... I felt nothing.

"You can't fight against it because he controls everything you and I do. The only reason we know we are fictional Sketch, is because that’s a part of the story. He is speaking through me to you even now, and he controls us, yet he may be completely unaware we are here, that this story is happening. He's writing this story right now, and wrote that he himself is unaware we exist, yet he truly doesn't think we exist, and he wrote that he doesn't truly thing we exist and so on and so on."

I took in deep breaths as I looked back up to Discord.

"We have to stop him!"

Discord could only laugh.

"Stop him? Oh that is rich. Nothing escapes his control, even if you did defeat him... It wouldn't be him, it would be a character in the story made to resemble him. If you truly did defeat him, he could not finish the story... Thus the story would end at that point. We need him to write we exist, else we don't."

"So basically if I'm Cthulhu... He's Azathoth."

Discord shrugged and smiled.

"I suppose, I don't know what those things are because I'm not written to know, but If you said it, then he wrote it, and so it's probably an apt description."

"Is anything I do of my own will?"

"Not a thing, even what you just said was written by him. You only care, because he has written that you care... However there is one saving grace for you."

"And that would be?"

"There are rules Sketch, rules to our world he has chosen to follow, oh sure he changes things to suit the story, but for the most part, we have rules he wants to follow, you should know, you just used one... Remember the anvil. That is a part of this world, another rule, the rules presented by this reality."

"What? The anvil... What does that have to..."

Oh... OH... OH! Cartoon Physics, it's not a part of the story, it's a part of MLP, and he needs to stick to the rules of MLP. Else it's not an MLP story.

I rubbed my head, I am having a very hard time wrapping my head around this... and the only reason I can't wrap my head around this is because I'm not written to... I think I get it now which means he wrote that I get it... Jesus Christ this is confusing.

I don't say anything for a while, I only kind of look at the expansive nothingness all around me. It... Kind of hurts the eyes to look at nothing but white... Why was it even white? I always assumed nothing to be black. Then again maybe that's just because of The Neverending Story... Huh, now that I think of it, that movie really had a Cosmic Horror element to it... I should watch it again... assuming I get out of here and actually exist to have the capability to watch it... Actually... How would nothing have a color... It's nothing, even the color clear is something... Am I the Nothing? I mean I kind of don't exist... Well I do, but at the same time I don't...

Okay, this place is getting to me. I'm thinking like a madman.

"Why are you here, and while we're at it, why am I here?"

Discord could only roll his eyes, literally he rolled them in such a way that made me question if he actually even had a skull.

"Consider this a reality check, your continued attempts to go off the rails is noted, but ultimately unnecessary and impossible. As for why I'm here, well the writer feels I am the best character to deliver this information to you... You won't remember it, none of it, not consciously anyway. You would remember it only as a whisper in the back of the mind, and that's well enough for him."

I slump over as I put my hands in my pocket.

"What was with the new powers Haze and I gained before I got here?"

I blink.

"Also where is Haze?"

Discord tilts his head, as if listening to something, he nods several times before he smiles.

"Well, to your first question, I'm getting something called new powers as the plot demands."

Great, I've been written into a corner. I must be in great fucking hands.

"As for Haze... Well, I'm talking to him elsewhere... Well not really elsewhere, technically it's nowhere... but I think you understand the idea. If you don't, well I'm sure the author has thought of that."

I kick at the non-existence around me before glancing back at Discord. Yeah I got it... Or I was written to get it...

Fuck this cosmic horror puppeteer psudo-existence bullshit. Fuck it right in it's convoluted confusing mind-fucking ass.

"What do I do now?"

Discord frowned.

"That's not up to you. You will do whatever the author writes, and not a thing more."

This is really depressing... And I find this depressing because I'm written to... Did I call this confusing, forget that. This is a major league mind fuck right here.

"Don't worry about it Sketch, even this right here is a part of the story, else it wouldn't have happened."

"So me talking to you in a void is a part of this dumb story?"

"Essentially yes, why I don't claim to know, but the author wrote it here for some reason. Everything that happens is the story, even the time loop you experienced. It probably just happened because the author thought it was clever."

"It's not."

"He wrote that to, makes you wonder if he really did think it was clever doesn’t it?", said Discord with a smile.

Jesus Christ this author sounds like a real asshole... You know since I'm thinking that, does that mean the Author just wrote that he himself is indeed an asshole... Jesus this is strange as all hell.

"Do you know what the time loop even was?"

"I know that it was the author, perhaps he wrote it so our conversation could happen now, maybe it's a part of some grand plan of the stories antagonist. Doesn't matter, all will be revealed eventually."

"How do you know?"

Discord's smile widened.

"Because Sketch this is a story, it has rules. If it's introduced it must be important to the plot, stories have a beginning, middle, and end. Stories aren't like life, it has structure. If something is revealed, it usually is either addressed or explained at a later date."

I sigh. I'm a puppet... nothing more... wait... That makes me wonder.

"Why does he keep write the story like this... I mean the whole thing with me being able to go off the rails?"

I watch as Discords eyes widen and look around frantically, but otherwise he looks calm as can be.

"Not sure, maybe it's to hammer the point in, maybe it's an excuse to bring this to light for the readers, rather than yourself. I'm not written to know, I can only assume."

Should have guessed, but whats with his eyes... Then again this is Discord.

"How can you assume if everything you says is written by this mysterious author."

Discord shrugs.

"I have no idea."

"So what now, I just wait for the story to continue?"

"Continue? Sketch, the story never even stopped."

And with that, Discord snapped his talons.

Author's Note

A lot of this meta stuff was inspired by one of m favorite games to play when bored, The Stanley Parable. If you haven't played it, I highly recommend it. It's funny, witty, and thought provoking. In addition, the narrator has that cool voice that is like honey for the ears... Minus the stick results that usually come from smothering ones ears in that sweet nectar collected by busy buzzing bees.