My Little Robot: Friendship Is Not Science!

by Mystical Rainboom

Rating: everyone
Tags: Random, Princess Celestia, Alternate Universe, Main 6, Nightmare Moon, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Spike, Comedy, Adventure, Science Fiction
Length: 2460

An alternate universe, where almost everypony is a robot and Twi-3000 must stop the Nightmare 600 from taking over Equestria.

An alternate universe, where almost everything is a robot and Twi-3000 must stop the Nightmare 300 from taking over Equestria.

Twi-3000 must now find the magic of friendship and the Elements of Harmony along with the the correct symbols of them.

Will Twi-300 be able to save Motherboard Celestia or will she waste her time with the nutty robots of Equestria?

(A slight parody of episode 1 and 2 with robots)

Published 2016-05-22 15:10:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-05-22 15:10:01 UTC

Initiating Story

In a grassy field, a small pony shaped figure was reading a document about the elements of harmony. The figure got up and walked into the sunlight. The figure was a purple robot with purple hoops for pupils in her eyes surrounded by blackness.

She stepped forward.

"Query: I recall hearing of said legends of harmony." The being scanned itself and found an error message in her head. "Memory files are corrupt. Must research with objects inside of library."

The being grew wheels out of her hooves and the tail turned into an exhaust pipe and she rocketed away. She passed three other robots and she received a transmission on her screen.

"Greetings, Twi-3000. Would you enjoy joining us for Moon-500's celebration after today's rotation of the planet?" A female robot asked.

"No. I have business that needs immediate care. Goodbye." Not missing a beat, Twi-3000 kept moving towards her library home.

This was 100% normal. Twi-3000 was not quite the social mare variant. She was always researching whatever Motherboard Celestia sent to her. She would spend days studying supposed "flesh ponies" and possible upgrades. She only took breaks to plug in and recharge for the night.

She arrived at her home and despite all of Equestria being populated by robots, the landscaped was that of a primal civilization.

Twi-3000 broke through her doors and knocked away a small green and purple robot carrying a present.

"Calling for Spike-bot! Calling for Spike-bot!" Twi-3000 used a beacon on her back to locate her assistant.

"Present." The small dragon shaped robot said. He got up and found his present crushed flat.

"Query: What are you doing?" Twi-3000 asked as she tucked her wheels away and researched her topic of interest. She found information on a discontinued model known as Nightmare-300

"I am arranging a surprise present for Moon-500's celebration in many hours." Spike-Bot replied. "Are you not joining?"

"Negative. Proceed to take a message to Princess Celestia." Twi-3000 said.

Despite having email, Twi-3000 had a discontinued signal to sending a message to the Motherboard. Spike-Bot, being a newer model activated from a box in Twi-3000's entrance exam, had an email option.

"Dear Motherboard Celestia, I have an important fact to share about Nightmare-300." Twi-3000 continued.

When she was finished, Spike-Bot sent the email. Immediately, another email came to Spike-Bot and he read it aloud.

"Dear Twi-3000, I respect your concern, but you must stop reading past models of several documents. I have a special assignment for you." Spike read.

3600 seconds later

"Share data with other robots in the vicinity of a location known as Ponyville." Spike-bot read aloud.

Translation: Make some friends. The pair were on a chariot being pulled by two jet like colt robots. They past a few clouds and found a village of a moderate size. Several robots were going about their day.

Twi-3000 said that she would search the library for proper answers. Spike-Bot still advised sharing data. One pink robot approached and Twi-3000 greeted her, but nothing happened.

Spike-Bot got closer and checked to see if she was malfunctioning. He detected engine sounds in her metal plot and opened the flap where her cutie mark would be. She wasn't malfunctioning. She was charging.

Without warning, the pink robot blasted off in a sonic boom and spread dirt across the pair. Miraculously, All of the buildings and robots nearby were in one piece. Twi-3000 used windshield wipers to clean her eyes and switched objectives.

Spike-Bot knew this was just her programming being stubborn, so he found her mainframe in her chest and made her travel to Sweet Apple Acres.

Twi-3000 found another robot bucking apples from a tree, but since she was so strong she kicked the tree itself over the horizon.

"Greetings, my identity is Twi-3000 and my serial number is 87900." Twi-3000 greeted the working robot.

The orange robot leapt in the air and pulled a flash drive out of the hat it was wearing. She stuck it in Twi-3000's slot on her head and pulled it out. She then put the flash drive into her system and downloaded the information.

"Greetings, Twi-3000. I am Applejack-56781, but you may refer to me as App56." The robot had collected enough information to give herself a nickname for Twi-3000 to call her.

"Why must I use a nickname?" Twi-3000 asked.

"To ensure your objective is complete, we may have personal labels for each other." App56 said.

"Strange. I shall be called Twi." Twi-3000 said.

"Understood." App56 said.

"Have you grown the appropriate amount of fruit for consumption?"

"Query: We robots cannot eat such materials. Why must we have them?" Spike-Bot interrupted. "Many of us have solar power."

Spike-Bot pointed towards a grey and somewhat error filled robot with solar panels on her back.

"We all use the fibers of food to power our inside mechanics to avoid spreading chemicals in the air." Spike-Bot said.

"In order to retain a proper landscape, incredible farm work is needed. We bring the food to a banquet merely to admire the cycle." Twi answered him.

"Understood." He said.

"It would help with your quest to learn the names of the similar models and Apple Products." App56 walked to a bell and kicked it to summon others.

Suddenly an incredible line of robots came and stood in place.

"...Mac27, Bloom-888, and Gran.5!" App finished.

The final three robots were a large and strong red stallion unit, a small yellow filly, and a calculator. The calculator was a model from an earlier time and was on a wheel chair.

Smash!

App had just crushed the calculator into several pieces.

"Gran.5!" App sent an e-mail to the robot and a dented and rusted robot came from the barn.

The screen on her mouth lit up with words, but had no audio.

"Greetings." Twi read from her mouth.

"It has been several months since her last upgrade and repair. Her audio sensors break down every month." App said.

The entire line of Apple Products then brought out a buffet of apple foods. The entire line prepared themselves and stared at the food for over 45 minutes.

Several Ponies went into hibernation, had to recharge, or suddenly malfunctioned. Eventually Twi and Spike-Bot made it back into town. They found a robot figure in the sky. It stayed there with rockets, but these ones didn't pollute the world either.

Twi shouted out asking why the figure wasn't working. The figure didn't move a bolt. Twi copied the robotic numbers on the robot and tried to signal her. Twilight used a rocket to fly towards her, but found a warning triangle on her.

"Spike, R-Dash 5000 is malfunctioning!" Twi shouted.

Spike was a portable repair unit for several models. He repaired R-Dash with some fresh parts. She could now hear, see, and brake correctly. He also repaired her signal. With no time to spare R-Dash cleared the ski in ten seconds. She thanked them and accepted her nickname.

Later, Twi and Spike arrived at Town Center to check on decorations. Twi scanned the room and found everything was in order. Spike, however, was witnessing the robot up ahead.

"Greetings, my name is Rari-3!" The robot yelled. She was alerted by Twi having a battery of 75%. She grabbed a cord and jammed it into Twi's cutie mark to charge her.

Rarity sent Twilight into sleep mode to allow her to charge and looked at Spike. They both stared at each other for 5 solid minutes.

Eventually they turned around and went back to business. Robots can't love based on current software, but the bond the pair just made was something moderately special.

Twi and Spike eventually met another robot, named Flutter-Bot. They looked at how she stared at the animals. Then Fluttershy pulled out a fan and blasted animals with wind.

Flutter-Bot turned around and pulled out two machine guns. She turned on her aiming computer and prepared to fire. Twi and Spike were alarmed.

"Cease and Desist!" They both shouted.

Flutter-Bot retracted her guns, when she recieved an e-mail from App.

"I'm sorry. I was built with an overdose of alertness." Flutter-Bot approached the pair.

Twi wanted to complete her quest and move on. She slowly approached her and give her a nickname. She decided to call her Flutter and escape with her mainframe intact.

Rather than open up her sympathy file for Twi, Flutter took note of Spike. She scanned him for his dangerous line of upgrades. Spike started giving information to her as she scanned the internet for his variants.

Being the naturally alarmed robot she is, Flutter lived in her cottage alone with a rabbit robot to try and help her. She followed Twi and Spike all the way to their home.

Eventually, she had what she needed and left. Twi and Spike felt contempt in their home.

"Spike. I believe we have achieved our task of friendship. Send a message to Motherboard Celestia that- INTRUDER ALERT!!!"

Twi and Spike were caught off guard, by a singal pink robot.

"Greetings, my name is Pink-3 P-5! I'm aware of your task to make friends and have summoned several robots to befriend you!" The robot said. "I shall also assign my nickname. Pink."

Pink was an advanced model beyond compare. She was also built with no way of tracking her. If someone needed to find her, they'd have to be emailed by her at that point.

In the span of a few hours, Twilight had exchanged documents with several robots to get acquainted with them. It wasn't really anything special, because it wasn't personal.

Later the entire town was called for a red alert, because Motherboard Celestia was missing. With the town figuring this out ahead of time, everyone searched for her. When nothing came up a distress beacon was received from the Everfree Forest.

The message was clear. Twi-3000 and her six main cohorts were to go and retrieve her. They all gathered together and entered, but Spike stayed put.

"We must find Motherboard Celestia!" A purple robot smashed into a wall and sparked in pain.

"Oh no!" Another redheaded robot sped into the area and smashed into another building.

One large blue flying robot was jetting through the sky and witnessed the mess, but decided to join and smashed into the ground.

Spike had his tools out and began to repair them, he could save Ponyville now or leave and comeback to a pile of busted bolts. As the nearest mechanic repair robot, Spike had to stay and assist others.

Twi tried to look into her hardrive to find a legend. She looked up which model robots were called upon for the rescue mission. She looked into the variant requirements. She needed evolution, alertness, repair, networking, and electricity productivity (generosity). She called Pink, Flutter, R-Dash, App, and Rari3.

As the robots walked into the forest a loud yawn echoed through their sensors. They continued onward and eventually the six robots travelled and met a wild manticore, but the manticore was fast asleep. It was drooling and seemed to have passed out.

Flutter had tranquelized the beast from over 20 meters away, because her aim was always in peak condition. The others continued on after Twi scanned Flutter.

Eventually a landslide had occured and tried to smash the robots, but they all flew out of danger, due to a sudden pop up. App had sent them this message the moment Flutter had told her in a private message.

A dark and misty field of dangerous animals and trees were blocking their path. It would be quicker to fly, but several animals could fly up and try to harm them, so Pink offered a free upgrade. She modified the group and they all had a new thermal sensor to locate any hostile threats. The only reason Flutter didn't send hundreds of tranquilizer darts was that she had limited ammunition.

One giant serpent had halted their progress again, but Rari-3 was on the case. She had taken a dose of her energy and sent an electric current throughout the entire river. The serpent passed out and crashed on the ground.

Lastly, once the image of a shadow bot had appeared R-Dash detected an error in her optical sensors and tried to repair herself again. Nothing was there, so she moved forward with the others.

"It is about time you arrive!" A loud voice shouted. The being was undetected. It laughed and made smashing sounds above the main group.

"We must quicken our pace." Pink said as she made a drill from her hair and made room for the others to join her.

The group hopped into the drill and found a lone large and blue robot in a room above them.. They all rocketed towards her and identified her as Nightmare 300. They all found the elements of friendship and tried to activate them.

"Inferior models! Friendship is of no use." Nightmare 300 pulled out a rocket and aimed for Twi.

"Progress of activation: 0.0%!" Twi said. "All units switch to plan B!"

A shield had appeared from Flutter and guarded the robots. They all suddenly began to transform pulling weapons and other tools from their insides.

In a white flash, Flutter had trapped Nightmare 300, App located Motherboard Celestia, R-Dash patrolled the room, and Rari-3 kept everypony charged up. They freed Motherboard Celesitia and Twi explained the situation.

As a precaution, Twi had brought the necessary components to take out Nightmare 300. They all managed to defeat her, but it was up to Pink for her last job.

"Complete!" Pink announced. She had rebuilt Nightmare 300 as Motherboard Luna. She was no longer evil and gave her several new features.

Motherboard Celestia asked why they thought friendship was the main task. Twi gave her the earlier message and they found an error. Friendship was a miscalculation! They were supposed to find the Elements of Technology! In truth, the Elements of Technology had to have already been with them to stand a chance. They had completed their mission. Everyone returned to town.

Everyone celebrated the upgrade in the same way they do banquets, hours of staring. Spike later caught up to Twi and the Motherboards and gave notice of how Ponyville needed many more tools for repairs. The Motherboards were alarmed by the news, they came to an agreement. Twi and Spike will stay here to guard Equestria with the other element bearers.

The town continued to go on in complete progression-

"Intruder alert! We are being watched by several organisms!" Pink alerted the town.

"With no warning?! Prepare to attack!" Motherboard Celestia announced,

Suddenly several hundred rockets flew towards a screen and caused it to go black.

Author's Note

Why not?