“Pinkie's Dick” and other Uninvited Thoughts

by Narrative Style

Rating: mature
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Rainbow Dash, Comedy, Night Light, Sex, Fetish, Twilight Velvet, Pinkie Pie, Slice of Life, Twilight Sparkle
Length: 3315

A collection of short stories about horny ponies, headed by a tale of Rainbow Dash having an awkward encounter with Pinkie Pie at the market.

Sometimes a thought comes in uninvited, sits down in your armchair, takes out a pipe, and makes itself at home. The following stories consist of some of the more entertaining such guests.
These stories contain references to sexual acts. Most of them will contain acts of sexual reference. None of them will contain nuts.
(Additional musings will be added as they come.)

Pinkie's Dick {Tame. Prudish, really; just a strap-on, nothing explicit.}
We start with a recounting of the time Rainbow Dash encountered Pinkie Pie at the market, only to notice an unexpected accessory that the party pony was wearing.

Private Reading {Mild Masturbation}
Now we take a moment to spy on Twilight in the bedroom. As usual, she has a book.

A Mother's Gift {Gender Bender, Youthification, and Implied Foalcon Between Consenting Adults. Because magic makes that phrase totally legitimate.}
Twilight's parents had a great time with their daughter over the holiday. But they'll be having an even better time with a certain gift now that she's gone.

Published 2016-03-09 04:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-05-27 04:27:32 UTC

Pinkie's Dick

Up bright and early, Rainbow Dash came in for a landing in the peaceful market square. It was pantry-restocking day, and this was the perfect time to hit the food stalls.

"Hi Dashie! Great afternoon!"

Early for Rainbow Dash, that is. The Pegasus turned around to see Pinkie Pie waving from across the square. She jumped a little back into the air and glided over, landing next to her curly-maned friend.

Rainbow replied, "Thanks. It only took a few minutes to set up."

They started walking together past the semi-permanent stalls set up to sell various wares, with Dash kicking into the air again to hover a few inches off the ground and Pinkie bouncing along beside her. Pinkie prattled on about her morning as Dash looked for the goods on her list.

An odd reference to birdbaths caused her to turn to look at her pink friend, opening her mouth to prod for clarification. As Dash's eyes beheld Pinkie's prancing profile, her mouth froze open, question forgotten. There was something beneath the pink mare, jiggling with each bounce. Rainbow Dash stopped moving, dropping to the ground as she continued to stare.

Pinkie stopped as well, turning to look at the stunned blue Pegasus, eyes completely innocent as they always were. "What is it, Dashie?"

A dick, Dash answered silently to herself. She shook her head and blinked, but it didn't go away. She forced herself to turn away from Pinkie's fully erect phallus and look into her face. Dash slowly worked her mouth into a new question. "Is there something you want to tell me, Pinkie?"

"Well, now that you mention it, I was wondering if I could borrow a cloud chair for a party tomorrow-" Pinkie began.

Dash interrupted. "No, that's not what I mean!" She looked back at Pinkie's rear, only now noticing the pink ribbons running down the pony's thighs and under her tail. A little bit of tension drained away at the realization that her friend hadn't grown another body part; it was just a toy. Still...

Dash tried again. "Why are you wearing a strap-on in the middle of the market?"

Pinkie giggled. "Because the dildo wouldn't stay on by itself!"

Dash was struck silent again, her jaw working as she tried to reassess her approach. It was then that she spotted another familiar face nearby.

"Hey, Rarity!" The Pegasus waved with a hoof, flaring her wings to further grab the Unicorn's attention.

The white-coated pony strolled over. "Good afternoon, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie." She noted that Rainbow's expression was a mix of worry and annoyance. "Is something wrong?"

Dash did not speak, merely gesturing at Pinkie's unusual fashion accessory.

Rarity looked for a moment, then turned back to Rainbow Dash. "That's Pinkie Pie, dear."

“I know it's Pinkie Pie, but look what she's wearing!” Rainbow jabbed her hoof violently at the pink phallus, nearly poking it.

The normally annoyingly proper Unicorn gave the accessory another cursory glance before facing Dash again, a look of mild perplexity on her face. “What about it?”

Jaw clenched in frustration, Dash tried again. “Why is she wearing a sex toy?”

Rarity tilted her head, seemingly confused. “Have you asked her?”

“Yes.”

“And what did she say?” Rarity prodded.

“Ooh, ooh!” Pinkie jumped back into the conversation, her fake penis bouncing distractingly as she hopped in place, “I know this one! I said, ‘Because the dildo wouldn't stay on by itself!’ Then Dashie gave me a look like this-” Pinkie paused to mimic Rainbow Dash's earlier expression, “and then she spotted you walking over there, and called out and waved you over-”

“I think Rarity gets the picture, Pinkie Pie.” Dash asserted over the explanation. A hoof had found its way to the top of Dash's snout, where it was rubbing in slow, hopefully calming circles.

“So,” Rarity's tone compelled Dash to pay attention. “Pinkie is wearing an artificial appendage, and you seem rather frustrated about it. Do you want her to take it off?”

“Yes- no! I…” Rainbow Dash swallowed to prevent any more words from coming out before she could finish processing the question. “…It's just weird, is all.”

A small smile crossed Rarity's face. “And Pinkie Pie being ‘weird’ is… unusual?”

“Well, no…” Dash looked at the ground, biting her lip as she tried to figure out what Rarity was getting at.

“So you are bothered by Pinkie Pie being herself?”

Dash's eyes snapped back to Rarity's face. “She's not being herself, though. She… she…”

“Doesn't usually have a dick?” That was Pinkie again, just as Dash had begun to forget she was there. The chubby pink mare was grinning wildly, for some reason only she knew.

After a brief pause, Dash said “Yes.” She didn't sound convinced of her own answer, though.

“Is there a particular reason why Pinkie shouldn't have a ‘dick’?” Rarity handled the word very delicately.

There was another pause as Rainbow Dash pondered the question. “I… I guess not?”

“There shouldn't be a problem, then!” Rarity broke into a full smile, as though the situation was resolved. “This is fantastic weather, by the way.” Rarity began to walk away, passing Pinkie Pie as she went and sparing one final glance at the object that had started this all. “And that matches your coat perfectly, Pinkie! It's simply marvelous.” The Unicorn then trotted off into the market.

Rainbow Dash stood still, her brain failing to come up with any useful instructions for her legs. That was Rarity, of all ponies. The mare who got upset when somepony so much as wore a tattered hat. What just happened?

Meanwhile, Pinkie's attention had wandered to other things. “Hey look, hay! That was on your list!” The rosy enigma bounced off into the crowd, her artificial appendage slapping her tummy rhythmically. Dash had to admit that hay was on her list, so she began to slowly follow.

A lot of Pinkie jiggled when she moved, Dash mused. Her cotton-like mane bobbed up and down; her bushy tail swung about; even her sweet-augmented butt… “She's adorable.”

Dash jumped a good meter into the air at the masculine voice. She looked frantically to the side to find a sleek, gray-coated stallion walking right next to her. He didn't seem to have noticed her startle, and continued to gaze forward at… Pinkie Pie?

Rainbow Dash gave him a look. Thunderlane was a good friend from the weather team, but she'd never heard him express interest in Pinkie before. And she was pretty sure that he swung the other way.

Before Dash could say anything, the unexpected walking buddy spoke again, loudly, but seemingly to himself. “I have this urge to run up and hug her. Sniff her cotton-candy mane. Nuzzle against that jiggling butt. Let her pierce me with that massive shaft…” The stallion sighed wistfully, then turned away from his object of attention, looking around the market. He soon found Rainbow Dash, whose mouth was hanging open a bit at the unexpected talk. “Oh, hey Dash, didn't see you there. I've gotta fly; see you tomorrow, though!” With that, Thunderlane leapt into the sky and soared off as if nothing had happened.

Dash's mouth tried out a few shapes before slipping shut, unable to decide on a sound. She resumed following Pinkie, who had by now stopped near a set of stalls and was chatting with a hay salesmare. As she approached, Dash again found herself examining her friend, this time broadside. Thunderlane was right, that was a pretty big dildo. Dash found herself smiling at the thought that it matched the rest of the mare's chubby torso. When she realized this, she twisted her face back into neutral; it was still weird.

Almost to the hay stall, Dash caught sight of the apple stall, where her friend Applejack was standing. She waved and called out, and the farmer looked over. AJ's mouth traced into a thin line and she raised a hoof in greeting before turning to an approaching customer. That was distinctly less friendly than usual, and Dash had almost decided to head over and see what was up when another pony wandered into her vision much closer up; pretty much in front of her snout, in fact.

Dash jumped back a little in order to see that it was Twilight Sparkle, resident princess and another good friend. After the initial shock, Dash decided to ask for Twilight's help in discussing social norms with Pinkie Pie. She started her plea, trying to ignore the slightly-too-wide grin on the Alicorn's face. “Twilight! I sort of need your help with Pinkie Pie-”

Before Dash could go further, the purple mare in front of her jumped in. “Oh, hello Rainbow Dash. Pinkie Pie? Sure, I can help with that! She's an admirable mare, isn't she? Confident, cute, peppy… pink. So anyway, what do you need my assistance for?”

Dash blinked, trying to catch up to the rapid flow of words. Twilight wasn't usually this excitable. Was anypony going to act normal today? “Uh…” Dash swallowed. “Well, Pinkie Pie is… being Pinkie Pie, and I need you to convince her of something. She's wearing this-”

“Hi, Twilight!” Pinkie appeared next to them, drowning Dash out.

“Why hello, Pinkie Pie!” Twilight's over-enthusiastic greeting was all the more strange in that she didn't actually turn to look at Pinkie to say it. “What were you saying, Rainbow Dash? Was Pinkie being-” Twilight paused, and brought a peace of paper out in front of her with her magic. “Uh, ‘her usual entertaining self?’ No, wait…” As Twilight searched for the right words, which were apparently written on note paper, a shout rang out from a few stalls down.

“Oh, fer cryin' out loud!” Dash, Twilight, and Pinkie looked over to see Applejack with her forelegs pushing down against her fruit stand, staring back at them with what appeared to be immense frustration. “Dash, Pinkie wants to fuck you! There, the nonsense is over with.” Applejack went back down to all-fours, huffing.

Twilight gave the farmer a disapproving stare, to which Applejack rolled her eyes. At the same time, Rainbow Dash turned toward Pinkie. “You really want to fuck me?”

Pinkie cocked her head to the side. “Of course! Who wouldn't?”

A smirk grew across Dash's face. This wasn't weird, this was fantastic! “You game right now?”

“Sure!” Pinkie hopped giddily in place.

Hearing this exchange, Applejack smiled confidently back at Twilight, to which Twilight failed to find an adequate retort.

Rainbow Dash jumped once, turning in the air to face away from Pinkie. She landed in a crouching position, hindquarters held high and tail flicked back.

Applejack's smile slipped. “Wait a sec- Not Here! Pinkie!”

The freshly minted pair, however, was too busy to take notice of their friend's distress.

Private Reading

There are few things more relaxing than curling up with a good book. It’s more than just the contents of the book itself; it’s the entire experience of letting yourself go, adventuring into the world of the book and for a time splitting off from the reality around you. A good book is one that allows you to do this; to divorce yourself from the world, and become completely absorbed in another place or another time.

Twilight knows this better than anypony, having spent perhaps more of her life reading than doing any other task, including sleeping. So it is now, past midnight, yet another book in front of her on her bed, a lamp on the nightstand barely lighting the pages. Only, this time, it’s different. Instead of drifting into the world of the book, the erudite Alicorn is examining the book’s manifestation in her own world.

She runs her hoof across the pages. Feeling the silken texture of the pulped wood against her frog. Watching the paper flatten in a ripple, pushing air out from between the leaves. Hearing the faint rustle of paper on paper and paper on pony.

She bends over and presses her nose against the words, smelling the paper, and the ink, and the little bookshop she’d bought it from. Feeling the supple pages against her snout.

Lifting her head, she observes the faint yellow tinge of the paper, and the thick black letters written on it. Reaching out, she closes the book. Her hoof lingers on the cover, a soft yet stiff wooden coat. It is a rich, light brown, like milk chocolate.

A lick. It tastes of dust, but the good kind; the kind of dust that covers things of great age and hides delicious secrets beneath.

Twilight Sparkle grabs the book, hugging it close to her chest, rubbing it against her fur. Her head bends over to rub her cheek against the other side of the tome. She falls onto her back, her hind legs lifting into the air and revealing a glistening slit between them.

She maneuvers the book down her chest, down her belly, and across her tits, sliding it a few times across her mounds and pressing it in, before moving further, nestling it between her thighs. She gasps at the contact of paper to flesh. The gentle, firm spine works its way between her pussy’s lips, up and down, back and forth, brushing her clitoris as it goes. Her back legs twitch and spasm as she works, her mouth emitting increasingly loud whinnies of pleasure.

Her eyes squeeze shut, allowing a torrent of words to flow across her mind. Scenes from half-remembered novels, old poems, and biology texts swarm around her, echo in her head; each syllable punctuated by a stroke of the tome against her clit. The room, the bed, the whole world falls away, and it’s just Twilight, the words, and the book that holds them, together in a perfect dance.

It isn’t long before she ceases, clamping her hips together around the glorious covers, now splattered with juices. She falls to her side, letting out a final neigh as her partner is thoroughly soaked.

After a while, a thought comes to the exhausted mare, unbidden, but not unwelcome. That… was a good book.

A Mother's Gift

"It was great to see you again." Twilight Velvet squeezed her daughter one more time, then stepped back so her husband could get a turn.

Twilight Sparkle looked over her father's shoulder at her mother. "It was great to see you, too. I'll be back after Winter Wrap-Up, okay?"

Night Light chuckled as the hug ended. "Don't go feeling like it's an obligation to visit us every season, now."

The younger mare grinned. "It's not an obligation; it's a privilege." She began making her way down the street toward the train station, giving a final wave. "Goodbye!"

When their daughter had walked out of sight, the deep blue stallion gave a sidelong glance to his wife. "So, about that mysterious package you ordered from Ponyville..."

Velvet smirked back. "Yes, you can open it now."

She turned to follow Light inside as he made his way to the bedroom, where the aforementioned box had sat tauntingly over the dresser for the last week, ever since Twilight had arrived. He'd tried to weasel the nature of its contents out of his daughter, but either Velvet had sworn her to secrecy, or she didn't know.

Velvet picked it up with her magic, placed it in her own hooves, and formally presented it to him. "Happy Hearth's Warming, sweetie."

Night Light ripped the box open, reached in, and pulled out... a dress. It was a lacy light blue garment with muted purple accents, fitting for a school-filly's formal wear. And it was foal-sized.

He held it up to himself and turned to his wife. "It looks wonderful, but I think it may be a little small."

Velvet gazed back at him with half-lidded eyes. "It's supposed to be." She stepped closer and ran a hoof through his mane. "It has some magic to make tonight a little more... real."

Light looked back at the cloth in his hooves, seeing it anew. They'd talked about getting some magical assistance for their favorite fantasy before, but it had never been that serious, mostly because finding a skilled Unicorn willing to help would have been rather difficult. Suddenly holding the idea in his hooves, a real, tangible thing, made him giddy. And very, very hard. He looked up at his wife, a plea in his eyes. "Now?"

Velvet leaned in to kiss him on the nose. "Now."

The stallion eagerly scrambled to the bed, sitting on the edge. He put his right back leg into the opening in the back of the dress. It filled the whole thing up, but he ignored that for the time being and focused on guiding his hoof through the frilly inner leg-hole of a built-in undergarment. The hole was far too small, but forcing his leg through stretched the fabric without sign of tear.

The dress did a lot more stretching as he pushed his left leg in, threading his other hoof through the second hole. He wiggled back and forth as he worked the dress up his legs, shivering as the smooth fabric hugged his thighs and finally settled over his crotch. He guided his ball sack carefully into place, then pulled the front of the dress up over his chest, the taught fabric squeezing his erect penis against his stomach, and squishing his balls so hard it felt like they might retract.

A further jolt of pleasure occurred when his wife reached over and stroked his staff through the dress. He giggled and nuzzled her, before giving another tug, forcing one foreleg through the tight forward sleeve. They had to work together to stretch the dress far enough for him to reach the other sleeve, and Velvet climbed up behind him to help pull it all the way up his legs.

Night Light looked down at the glossy blue fabric hugging his forelegs, outlining his dick, and flowing on down to his knees, which were themselves forced together by the overtight skirt. He ran a hoof over it, a thrill catching in his throat and a twitch going through his cock. Then the dress was pulled even tighter as Velvet used her magic to tie the back together. As the last string was set in place, Night Light was sure he wasn’t going to be able to breathe.

Then a tingling that was not oxygen deprivation danced across his skin. As he watched, the dress's squeezing began to actually compress his forelegs, making them shrink. Soon his barrel followed suit. The parts of him not covered by the dress lagged slightly behind, but his hind legs and head were soon shrinking as well.

He felt a pop as his balls actually did retract, and his phallus was dragged downward in a torrent of pleasure, disappearing into the edge of a fresh opening he felt outlined against the still-tight undergarment. A cough forced its way out as his vocal cords realigned, and he crossed his eyes to watch as his snout shortened, the tip turning up cutely. He felt his dark blue mane flow down his back, suddenly much longer. A tickling around his ankles signaled that his tail had done the same. His legs lost muscle, and his hips widened, his stomach and chest shaping into a feminine curve.

As the changes ended, Night Light fell back on the bed, panting heavily. She looked up to see Velvet leaning over her, gazing down in that loving, motherly, sexy way she had. Velvet looked bigger, her light gray face eclipsing everything else. Light smiled blissfully up at her wife. Her mother.

Velvet leaned in, kissing the tip of Light's horn, then slowly moved down for a second, deeper kiss on soft, youthful lips. "Oh, you are adorable. My sweet little filly. Mommy's going to show you wonders."