Always a Princess, Never a Mare.
"I'm sorry to leave everything to you like I am Luna. I do appreciate that you are willing to take charge on such short notice." Celestia said to her sibling as she used her magic to retrieve scrolls filled with schedules and reports from their storage places.
Princess Celestia had only recently started to take time off from ruling Equestria. It was rare for the monarch of the sun to do so but, the return of her sister meant the lessening of responsibilities. It would be the eighth year since she started taking these "vacations" and it still baffled everypony why she did so during the same time frame each year and at the same location no less.
"It is no trouble at all dear sister; we are pleased that you have decided to take your vacation after all. It seemed as if you were not going to make it this year as the date kept getting closer." Luna replied.
Luna standing at the doorway to Celestia's office, watching as her sister was preparing everything she needed for the day court while absent. It amazed Luna that her sister had decided to take a vacation after ruling so long without any breaks to relax. The first day of Celestia's announcement of a holiday took Luna by surprise as that was the last thing she would ever have expected from her workaholic sibling.
Celestia smiled and walked over to hug Luna; she held her close for a moment, all the while still gathering all the scrolls needed for the tasks Luna faced in the days to come. She knew that Luna had been worried about whether or not she would be taking a vacation this year as well. While her smiles, speeches, and waves could fool the majority of the populace, she knew that Luna could see through her mask. It became increasingly evident with the year Luna had packed and prepared everything for the vacation even before Celestia had brought it up.
The two sisters broke the hug and began discussing how to deal with the day court nobles and the situations the nation was currently facing. They talked through the better part of the day until Luna had mentioned the time and Celestia set the sun one last time before her days off. It was only for a week and a half but, it held great significance to Celestia. Though, this year she nearly missed it due to her wavering feelings.
The sisters parted ways outside the office, Luna heading to start the night court and Celestia to her room to rest for the trip. As she lay in bed, Celestia thought about the reason for her vacation. She had originally intended for it to be a one-time event, she never thought that it would continue for as long as it did. Each year she would be overwhelmed by the feelings raging inside her. Each year she would question her motivation for doing going to such a place. Each year strangled a little more of her heart, and yet, she just couldn't stop.
This year she had almost not even went but, the idea of not going affected her emotionally and mentally. Luna had noticed the first day that something was wrong, and it even became apparent to the citizens that something was bothering the princess. The guards saw she would not smile as much as they were used to as the week that she usually took off got closer. The maids and butlers saw her eating less and forgoing tea and cakes in the gardens, which, was one of the few breaks she had in her busy schedule. The nobles, arrogant and self-serving as they were, were even keeping silent in her presence as they felt the air heavier than usual.
Celestia hated the fact that she had become so transparent as to worry her sister and many of her ponies. She hated it but, at the same time she appreciated the little things they had done to try and cheer her up. It had touched her so much that she decided to take the vacation in the end. She closed her eyes and slept, leaving the rest of her worries for her dreams and the morning.
The first time she had taken the week off the royal guards had been with her throughout the whole journey. It had put a huge strain on her activities as she could not do what she had planned with them constantly being on watch. At the end of that first week, she managed to do everything she had planned but, decreed that she would undergo this journey alone. Her sister had voiced her displeasure of having Celestia travel alone and had the sun princess, at least, keep guards at her final destination even if they were only allowed a certain distance. Celestia agreed to the conditions as it would work in her favor considerably.
Her travels took her from the Frozen North to the Everfree, across Saddle Arabia, and into the Neighlantic Ocean. She had scoured the greater parts of Equestria and beyond for the items she needed. It was a foolhardy quest if anypony else had known what she was doing or planned to do then surely they would have stopped her. She didn't care about that, though, as each year let her come closer to her goal. Each year it left her with some sense of closure.
This year, however, she had finished her search three days early as the final piece fell into her hooves easier than expected. It had been at a small shop in the middle of Manehatten; it looked like an ordinary gem to any pony that looked at it. A dark red gem, round and completely low-grade to anypony else that had seen it in the shop. She had purchased it quickly enough as her status let her do such things with ease but, not without dragging attention. She played a lot of that attention off as visiting her ponies and buying souvenirs.
Regardless of all that, she landed on the balcony of a manor located near the base of Rainbow Falls. The guards patrolled around the manor none getting close enough to the building to notice anything amiss. As she went inside, she put away her bags and held the gem within her magic in front of her.
"Eight years of searching, and waiting for the right time. Eight years of guilt for lying to Cadence, Twilight, and even Luna. I finally have the last piece, all I need to do is insert it, and this will all be over." She kept staring at the gem thinking of all secret that had taken a toll on her mentally and emotionally.
Celestia walked over to a corner of the room with the gem still in her magic floating behind her. She stared at the device she had built according to plans that Starswirl had left behind. She knew that what she was doing was foolish but, she was so close. The device itself stared back at her unmoving and lifeless. It was reflecting the emotions she was going through at the moment. That's when she took a look at herself; she looked to find an exhausted mare. A mare that had spent too much time trying to achieve something that had an unknown percentage of actually working. She stared into her eyes, half-dead from the emotional drain of the past eight years.
Celestia wondered why she was doing this again; she wondered why she needed to suffer so much for such a low probability of success. She levitated the gem into a small ornate box that sat next to the device. She couldn't go through with it, not after realizing what might happen if it did fail. Though, even if it had succeeded, what then? How could she even hope of finding him? Of curing him? Of saving him? No, she left the device alone, her heart finally steeling itself with heavy and reluctant acceptance. She had done so much but, she couldn't risk exposing unknown dangers to her ponies. Even if it meant destroying all she had done the past eight years.
"I'm sorry, I just can't do it after all. If you were here, I'm sure you would do the same. The ponies must always come first; we can't just jeopardize their futures for our happiness. I'm so sorry." She lay down in front of the device crying for what seemed like ages to her but, was only an hour. Once the tears could fall no more, Celestia rose and proceeded to the balcony. With one last look behind her at the mirror she wiped a lonely stray tear and took off for Canterlot.
"Goodbye, Sombra."
She left the manor, leaving the mirror and gem that could power it separate and incomplete. She never returned to the building again; there she left her feelings behind once more for the sake of her ponies.
Author's Note
A short story I thought about while re-reading the "Reflections" MLP comic. I really love the fact they gave Sombra such a great parallel version. Sombra, in general, is a great character in my honest opinion. If you have never read the origin story for Sombra then I highly recommend it. It should be in "Fiendship is Magic" issue #1. It isn't the same Sombra from "Reflections" but, it is a great comic nonetheless.
Let me know what you think by leaving a comment. Thank you for reading and have a great day.