We Really DO Sound Alike...

We Really DO Sound Alike…

The town of Ponyville was quite the sight to behold up close as Twi and I walked through. Everywhere, there were candy-colored ponies of all ages and… races, I guess, with tattoo— I mean, “Cutie Marks,” going about the various routines and tasks of their day. The environment was almost something I’d only seen and read about in history books; completely dirt roads devoid of any traffic light or motor vehicle and buildings made of milky-white cobblestone with unbelievably medieval designs to them, and even stands that sold various necessities such as fruits, vegetables and flowers. Shockingly enough, there seemed to be modern-day inventions here, as I saw a little orange filly with spiky purple hair and a blue riding helmet zooming by on a scooter.

“Sooo, how do ya like Ponyville so far?” Twilight asked.

“It’s incredible…! But so odd at the same time…” I answered, perplexed by everything around me. “Everything here looks so archaic… but then I’m seein’ stuff that I wouldn’t expect of a place that seems so old-fashioned…”

“Old-fashioned? I’m not sure what you mean. Ponies have lived this way for a very long time. I suppose it seems ‘old-fashioned’ to you because your world is a bit more… advanced than this one is in some aspects.”

“Yea, I guess. Hey, are we close to this Apple Acres place?”

“That we are! It’s right over there,” Twilight answered as we approached a large field that was covered in apple trees with a big red barn in the distance. The place seemed no different than any farm I saw in my world, which shocked me even more. Something clicked in my brain the second I saw the many apples.

“Wait a minute… I take it we’ll be meetin’ this friend o’ yours… Applejacks, I think?” I asked.

“Applejack,” Twilight corrected. “And yes, you finally get to meet the pony who sounds like you!” She said with a smile. As we walked into the field through the gate, we were greeted with a “Howdy!” from an orange mare with a cowboy hat and a blonde mane and tail that were… ironically tied up in ponytails. Right before she came over to us, she kicked a large, sturdy tree with both of her hind-hooves, causing every apple in it to fall into two baskets nearby it. My eyes widened in surprise.

“Hi Applejack!” Twilight responded to the green-eyed mare with a smile.

“An’ who’s this tall dark feller here?” she asked. I opened my mouth to speak, but Twilight interrupted right away.

“This is… Ponder Memoir!” Twilight answered for me, causing me to shoot her a confused look. She winked at me, which I read loud and clear. I suppose ‘Ponder Memoir’ would become my pony nickname here so I could better fit in. I guess telling anyone here my actual name would be a bit unusual, not to mention cause suspicion. I wasn’t sure why, but given that the two ponies I’d known up to this point were named for something having to do with their special talents, I assumed that was the case for everyone here.

“Uhh, yes, I’m Ponder Memoir. But you can call me Ty. How ya doin’, Applejack?” I shakily said, holding out a hoof.

“Howdy, pardner! Any friend o’ Twi’s is a friend o’ mine!” Applejack brightly said, touching her hoof to mine. “I reckon yer new to Ponyville. Would y’all like somethin’ ta eat?”

“Sure!”

“Alrighty! Follow me!” Applejack commanded with a wave of her hoof as we made our way to a nearby picnic table. The meal she’d made for us, I suppose shouldn’t have come as a surprise; given the girl’s name was APPLEjack. There wasn’t a single thing she fed Twi, Spike, and I that didn’t have some kind of apple in it. Apple Pie, Apple Cobbler, Apple Fritter, Apple everything! Unfortunately, this is where problem number two arose. I had NO idea how I was supposed to use the fork and knife in front of me when I had hooves instead of hands.

“Thank you for this meal, Applejack!” I said.

“No thanks necessary,” she responded graciously. “No newcomer’s ever been t’ Ponyville without tryin’ some famous Apple family cookin’!”

“Quick question, though. I know this is prolly gonna sound kinda dumb, but… umm… How do I use these?” I asked, pointing a hoof to the silverware. Applejack shot me a look of confusion.

“Ya jus’ pick ‘em up, put ‘em in th’ food, an’—!”

“No, I mean how do I pick these things up when we got hooves instead o’ hands or claws?” As I should have expected, another even more confused look from the orange Earth pony aimed at me. I heard Twi and Spike stifling giggles until I glared at both of them, causing them to stop, although they were each wearing goofy grins.

“Twi… Where’d ya find this stallion...?” Applejack whispered to Twilight. “He seems a few apples short of a bunch...” Twilight giggled some more. I face-hoofed and let out a deep, exasperated breath as I reached for the fork, which miraculously stuck to the bottom of my hoof, and stuck it into an apple turnover on my plate. As soon as I realized my endeavor, I let go of the fork and gazed at it in amazement.

“What the…? How is that even…?” I mumbled to myself in amazement.

“Theeeeere ya go, sport! Way ta use the ol’ noggin!” Applejack teased, causing the unicorn and the dragon to laugh even more. I flashed a fake smile at her, and then turned to my plate. “Ya sure ya don’t need me t’ tell ya how to lift it inta yer mouth?” she quipped again with a laugh. Surely enough, Twilight and Spike joined her in laughter. I clenched my teeth in annoyance and grabbed the fork again, still looking down at the plate.

“Jeez, I hope not everyone here’s a smart-ass…” I grumbled under my breath.

“Didn’t quite catch that, sugar cube. What’d ya say?” Applejack asked in a genuinely curious tone. Twilight and Spike went completely silent, which scared the shit out of me. I refused to look up as I feared the worst.

“Oh, crap! What do I tell ‘er now!? I can’t tell her what I said! I’ve seen what she can do to trees! I don’t wanna have all my teeth kicked outta my face like the apples outta that tree! Ummmm…!”

“I said uh… I hope everyone here’s not… bein’ too crass! Y’know, table etiquette and such. I uh… I want to make the best first impression on you that I can, seein’ as I want to be friends with you an’ all.” I said with a nervous chuckle. Thankfully, the orange mare chuckled with me.

“Aww shucks, yer already good in my book! Even if ya do seem ta be a bit out there. You sound like y’all paid a li’l visit ta Rarity before comin’ here.” Applejack chuckled some more.

“Gee thanks… I guess. But no, we ain’t get to see this Rarity pers— pony yet. I just like to be as polite and considerate as I can when I’m a guest.”

“So yer smarter than yer lettin’ on…?” Applejack stared at me for a bit. “You definitely are an interestin’ one, Ponder Memoir. But I’m sure I’ll get ta know ya better once we’re done eatin’. Let’s dig in!” Applejack said as she grabbed her fork and began to eat her apple pie. The various apple (food) products were like nothing I’d ever tasted before… By the time I was done, I’d developed a new appreciation of apples. I also gained a better understanding of the whole “Cutie Mark-Special Talent” relationship. I saw Applejack’s was a trio of red apples, which I guessed meant her special talent had everything to do with apples.

“So, Ty… How’d ya like them apples?” Applejack mused.

“I ain’t even gon’ trip. That was amazin’!” I happily answered.

“Ya know, one thing I done noticed about you, other than the fact that y’all are about as big as my big brother, and that you’re a bit outta the ordinary, is yer accent… Ya sound almost like I do!”

“Really now? I can’t tell the resemblance…” I joked. Everyone chuckled.

“Heh heh, you’re a funny one. But hey, where ya from, Ty? You definitely don’t seem like nopony from a place I ever been to…” Applejack asked with wonder.

“Trust me, iss a LOOONG story, and given that I gotta get a better look around this town, I might not get time to tell ya the whole thing today… Le’ss just say that I’m from a place VERY far away from here.”

“How far we talkin’? New Colt City? Manehattan? Mare-yland? Fillydelphia?”

“He’s from an alternate universe,” Spike suddenly blurted, causing me to shoot him a wide eyed stare that said, “What the hell, man!?” Twilight gave him such a scolding glare that I got scared even though she wasn’t looking at me.

“Really?” Applejack asked as her eyes widened in interest.

“No! Not at all!” Twilight hastily interjected with a blatant lie, smiling sheepishly. “Spike was just uh… telling a little joke is all!” Applejack turned to look at the unicorn, studying her mannerisms.

“Now Twi, as the Element of Honesty, I can tell when anypony is fibbin’. Y’all ain’t gotta hide nothin’ from me. If it’s true that Ty here’s not even from this world, then I don’t see a reason to hide it. As crazy as it sounds…”

“Element of—?” I tried to ask.

“You’re really from a whole ‘nother place outside of this here universe, huh?” Applejack quickly interjected as she turned back to me.

“Y-yea,” I stuttered, unsure of what to say next. “But that’s somethin’ I’d rather not let everyone here know. At least, not yet.  I don’t need the heat right now, y’know? I don’t wanna cause some kinda mass panic or nothin’…”

“I hear ya. Yer secret’s safe with me. But seein’ as I know now… what’s your place like? Are the ponies there nice? How’d y’all wind up here? Are the apples there as good as ours?” Applejack relentlessly drilled me with question after question. As much as I REALLY wanted to sit there and play 20,000 questions with the apple farming mare, I figured Twilight would eventually give her the answers she was looking for when I answered all the questions in that notebook.

“All part o’ that story I owe ya tomorrow. Whoo, look at the time!” I hastily announced as I looked at the invisible watch on my fore-hoof. “Twi, Spike, wouldn’t you say it’s time for me to explore Ponyville some more?”

“Yes!” Twilight answered with gusto as she, Spike, and I regrouped and prepared to leave.

“Well, hold on, y’all!” Applejack yelled, stopping us in our tracks. “Surely, y’all got at least enough time to introduce Ty to Big Mac an’ Granny Smith!”

“That’d be nice, but uh… Don’t you and Big Macintosh have a lot of chores to do today?” Twilight asked while trying not to sound hopeful about distracting the orange country mare from the barrage of questions she had ready for me.

“Oh! I completely forgot! Thanks fer remindin’ me, Twi!” Applejack responded with realization of her duties. She hastily got up to grab all of the dishes from the picnic table to carry them into a house nearby. “Y’all are free t’ go now! Today’s gonna be extra busy for us! Nice meetin’ ya, Ponder Memoir!” Applejack announced as she ran off. Twi and I breathed a sigh of relief as we left the farm to return to the town.

“That… could’ve gone more smoothly,” Twilight said.

“Irony hurts, don’t it?” I remarked, snickering at the unicorn.

“Hey now, you made a couple of mistakes yourself back there, ‘Ponder Memoir’. Also, that last little slip-up wasn’t my fault. Right, Spike?” she replied, turning to glare at the dragon riding on her back.

“Umm… An honest mistake, really!” the dragon said with a shrug and a shy, squinting smile.

“So where should we go next?” I asked.

“Hmm… I’d say we should go—!”

“Twilight! Look out!” Spike yelled. Both the unicorn and I turned to see and hear a screaming rainbow-colored blur beaming towards us at a startling speed. Before any of us could move, the blur came crashing into us, sending Spike flying off of Twilight’s back as the object hit the unicorn and me hard, and knocking us to the ground along with it. We quickly recovered from the blow to see a light blue Pegasus with an unkempt, spiky rainbow-colored mane and tail lying flat on her back in a daze…