A Field Trip!

A Field Trip!

After a fantastic morning of washing up and playing guessing games with Twilight on what she ate, we were on our way. It turns out that a pony’s diet isn’t far off from an actual horse’s, as she appeared to be a vegetarian (or herbivore, in her case). I gave her an especially large green apple to eat for breakfast. Fun Fact: Apparently, her favorite food is dandelion sandwiches. Why she likes to eat dandelions on bread, I have no clue… Must be a pony thing. She also seemed to like sweets, as I found huge teeth marks in the slice of chocolate cake I was saving in the refrigerator.

“Remember; keep quiet, and write down questions and notes for whatever you find interestin’,” I instructed the lavender unicorn as we reached the front door of my home.

“Got it, boss!” Twilight responded with delight from within the big black book bag. With that, we made our first steps outside of the house to reveal a large cul-de-sac surrounded by tall trees, cars of various shapes, sizes and colors parked in front of every nearly identical-looking house, and a pond located off to the side, behind two of the large houses. Already, I could hear a faint twinkling sound, followed by the pen scribbling furiously against the notebook.

“See anythin’ worth notin’, li’l pony?” I jokingly asked.

“Yes… EVERYTHING!” Twilight answered in a somewhat-dreamy tone, enunciating her last word.

“Good to hear. On we go, then!” I announced as I began to walk out of the cul-de-sac and into town. We walked a good two miles around the small town. There wasn’t much to see other than woods and more housing complexes, so I elected we find a livelier place for Twilight to take her notes.

“Where should we go?” Twilight asked.

“For the sake of education, my dear, we take public transportation into a large city!” I dramatically responded as we stopped at the nearest bus station to catch a bus that led into a huge, hustle-and-bustle city. I could feel Twilight’s hooves kicking gently with glee from inside the bag.

“What’s this?” the unicorn asked after we reached our first destination.

“A bus stop. We gonna wait here for a bus to take us to a city about an hour away that has more for you to study an’ look at.” I plainly replied.

“I thought you said we weren’t going too far.”

“I changed my mind.” Twilight went silent for a minute. “I promise we won’t be caught.”

“And by ‘we,’ I presume you mean ‘me’?”

“Precisely! Which is why you are gonna be makin’ NO sounds at all that might give you away.”

“If you say so…” Twilight timidly responded after taking a deep breath, the twinge of nervousness evident in her voice. With that, the bus arrived and we got on. Of course, additional twinkling and loud, rapid scribbling sounds were made from within the bag during the ride, which I INGENIOUSLY blotted out with random, frequent fits of coughing.

“Sir, are you okay? You’ve been coughing like that since you got on,” a fellow passenger, a frail-looking old woman in a white flower dress, commented.

“Uhh… yes, I’m fine. Just a li’l sore throat is all,” I lied before I quickly but carefully took off the bag and set it down on my lap. Immediately, I slapped a hand on it to get Twilight to stop making noise. This was ineffective as it spooked the unicorn, causing her to let out a small squeak in surprise. At that moment, the passenger began to eye me with extreme scrutiny, seeming to not blink for a second. I held my breath as I darted my eyes around the vehicle, looking for some sort of way to distract the old woman. My mind raced as she stared me down:

“Oh no, oh no, oh no! She musta heard Twilight squeal! WhatdoIdo, WhatdoIdo, WhatdoIdo? Umm… I know! I could just get up and move! But then she prolly gonna get real suspicious. Maybe I could just cough some more… But the fact that I stopped will prolly tip her off that I’m hidin’ somethin’… No, wait. I got it! I—!”

“You got some toothpaste on your lip, sir,” the woman flatly stated, breaking my train of thought. I let out a huge sigh of relief while quickly bringing my hand to my mouth to wipe off the toothpaste residue.

“Uh, th-thanks!” I blurted, still flustered from the discovery I’d thought she’d made.

“You’re welcome, hon,” the lady replied before turning away to talk to someone else. The rest of the ride was eerily silent, save for the roar of the bus’s engine as the vehicle moved from destination to destination in a timely order. Eventually, Twilight and I had made it to the city, luckily without being caught.

“That… coulda went more smoothly,” I mumbled as I got off of the bus.

“Ya think, Toothpaste-lip?” I heard Twilight whisper back sarcastically from within the bag I was holding in my hands. I almost responded, but then I realized we were surrounded by other people. Instead, I nonchalantly flicked the bag where I thought the unicorn’s head would be.

“Ouch…! Hey, watch it…! That was my rear…!” Twilight whispered harshly.

“Hehe… oops,” I snickered. I then put the bag properly onto my back, only to receive a hard hoof to my back after doing so. I grunted loudly as I stumbled forward a little, looking to have tripped.

“Hehe… oops,” Twilight whispered vindictively, snickering. I growled and shook my head in annoyance as I walked in no particular direction into the city. I walked around for hours, giving Twilight Sparkle perfect opportunities to observe various buildings, busy streets, and many different people. As a small bonus for her agreement to take this trip, I brought her to a nearby boardwalk that had an abundant supply of souvenir shops, food stores and even a couple of casinos, which I chose not to enter, as I was uncertain of such a negative influence existing in her world. Twilight Sparkle seemed to have never put down that pen as she scrutinized and recorded every detail she could about our surroundings. After making our way off of the boardwalk and to a local donut shop for some lunch, I set the bag down onto a table and peeked inside.

“How ya makin’ out with them notes, Twilight…?” I asked quietly.

“Splendid, Tyshawn! Oop…!” Twilight excitedly responded, almost forgetting to stay quiet. The radiant gleam in those big violet eyes could have melted hearts made of even the coldest ice, she was so adorable. “There’s so much to see in this world…! Life here seems so similar to that in Equestria, yet… so different at the same time in so many ways…! I actually think I’m almost out of space in this notebook. This adventure is no less than… awesome…!” She finished as she smiled from ear to ear.

“Tha’ss great to hear…! Say, it’s about lunch time… would you like some donuts or cake or somethin’…?”

“You have those here…?? I’d love some…!” Twilight’s eyes grew wide as she realized something. “Hey… how’d you know I like sweets…?”

“Heh heh… Don’t think I ain’t see the cake in the fridge this mornin’…” I replied with a wink.

“Oh, sorry… I-I couldn’t help myself… It was… an experiment…?” She sheepishly stammered, blushing and smiling.

“Iss alright… now le’ss get us some sweets…” I said smiling warmly as I slowly ran one hand down her unbelievably soft, vibrantly-colored mane and back. She responded to the gesture in a way akin to an actual pet (y’know, if pets could talk and show emotion in the same way humans do); she relaxed herself, arching her back as she let out a sigh of enjoyment, a look of blissful satisfaction appearing on her face. Though I was interested in her surprisingly pleasured reaction to such a simple gesture, I decided I’d question her on it later as I went to buy four glazed donuts and a large, cream-filled chocolate éclair for us to share.

“Shouldn’t we have something to drink with that?” Twilight asked as we left the donut shop. “I’m not entirely sure about you humans, but sweets are known to make a pony thirsty.”

“You’re right,” I answered. “But there’s this real good kinda drink I want, called a ‘slushy.’”

“A… ‘Slushy?’” Twilight asked, her curiosity piqued.

“Yeah. You never had one before?”

“I haven’t even heard of such a thing before…”

“Well now! Prepare to be surprised!” I stated as we headed to the nearest convenience store. I made the trip to the store quick, getting exactly what I needed, an extra-large slushy, of which I took the liberty of mixing up the flavors between grape, blueberry, and watermelon, and took two straws. After buying the drink, I sat down on a bench in a small park that was across the street from the store, setting the bag down by my side.

“You can come out of the bag now, if you want.” I said, concerned that Twilight was getting a bit cramped.

“What?? A-are you sure?” she asked back, noticeably scared.

“Well, not really… but come on, you been in that bag all day, give them legs a good stretchin’!”

“O-okay… This doesn’t seem like such a great idea, but we’ve gotten this far… So, I trust you…” she timidly said, slowly poking out her head before creeping all the way out.

“If anybody sees us or says anythin’, then you are my pet dog wearin’ a costume. And just to be safe, use the bag to cover yourself while you sit.”

“A dog?” she asked with a deadpan tone, implying that the suggestion I made was to her chagrin.

“S’all I can think of.” I narrowed my eyelids and put on a smug smile. “…especially with the way you reacted to me pettin’ you back at the donut shop.” She was speechless. She looked away, her cheeks turning a bright pink.

“I… I-I have no idea what you’re talking about,” she tried to deny.

“Mm-hmm… anyway, here’s what I got; four donuts- two for me, two for you- and a chocolate éclair for desse… later for us to split. Also, I got this giant fruit-flavored slushy for us to share.” If she was hungry before, she must have been ravenous then. Her eyes were so focused on the meal we had in front of us that I swore she tuned out everything I’d just said.

“Hey, Twlilight… Twlilight?” I called as she continued to stare at the donuts and éclair. If I didn’t know better, I’d say I saw a strand of drool forming in the corner of her mouth, too. I raised my hand to her ear and snapped my fingers as hard as I could. She shook with fright, as if she’d been awoken from a deep trance. “Hahah… you can ea—!” I didn’t even finish my sentence before she quickly grabbed and took a huge bite out of her first donut. More than half of the donut was gone in a single CHOMP!

“Well jeez! Keep eatin’ like that, and you won’t even get time to enjoy the thing!” I warned as I bit into my first donut. Twilight didn’t seem to hear that one either, as she let out a pleasured “Mmmmmmmm…” while staring into the sky.

“Just like how they make ‘em in Ponyville…”

“My goodness, girl, if that was that good, then I’d love to bake somethin’ for ya if I get the chance.”

“You can bake?” Twilight asked as she ate the remainder of her first donut.

“Shocker, right?” I asked back sarcastically with a mouthful of donut.

“Well, yes, actually… you don’t seem like the ‘baker’ type.”

“I see ya point. It’s more or less an occasional thing, so I don’t do it a lot.”

“Intriguing…” Twilight pondered as she bit into her second donut. She then stared inquisitively at the blue, red, and purple-swirled slushy for a good minute, eventually using her magic to levitate it towards her.

“You ain’t gonna get a good idea of what that is by starin’ at it…” I told her. “Here’s a straw.” I slid the straw into the icy refreshment and gently nudged it towards her to let her take a sip.

“…you sure this will—?”

“Just drink it. I assume you like learnin’ new things through experience.”

“I do! But I…”she began, but trailed off as I shot her an annoyed stare. “Fine… here goes nothing…” She slowly, nervously put her lips onto the straw and took possibly the slowest sip ever. Her eyes widened once the frosty liquid finally made contact with her tongue.

“Well? How is it?” I asked, intent on hearing her opinion.

“It’s… it’s delicious!” she gleefully responded. “It’s like a mix of ice cream and soda, but not quite either of them at the same time… I’d better take another sip to get a better idea…”

“Alright but be careful. Too much will—!” I cut myself off as I saw her practically inhale a large portion of slushy.

“WAAH!” Twilight shouted in sudden pain. As I expected, she immediately jerked away from it, clamping her fore hooves to the sides of her head, her eyes squeezed shut in ache as she spat some of the slushy in her mouth out and all over my blue shirt and the bench. She lost her magic grip on the cup, but I grabbed it as soon as I saw the magenta glow suddenly disappear.

“…give you brain freeze,” I finished, stifling a chuckle.

“Oww… what’s this… ‘Brain Freeze’ you’re talking about?” She asked in a strained tone as she massaged her temples to rid herself of the sudden burst of sub-zero agony.

“Brain Freeze is what happens when you eat or drink too much of somethin’ tha’ss super cold. It makes ya head hurt for a few seconds. Oh, and thanks for the new shirt design…” Twilight, finally relieved of her tiny headache, opened her eyes to see the mess she made.

“Hehe oops… sorry,” she said, trying not to laugh (and failing). “But… why does that happen?”

“I don’ really know, but I would guess that the sudden change in temperature in your mouth winds up sendin’ shockwaves through the rest of your head.” I informed her as I grabbed the slushy, sunk my own straw into it, and took a few long, careful swigs.

“Hey, save some of that for me!” Twilight demanded, clearly craving more of the icy treat.

“I AM savin’ you some… On my shirt, that is. You can have all of the slushy you spit out all over me. I’m sure you know a magic spell or two that make shirts taste good…” I quipped before taking another long drink, this time looking right at Twilight Sparkle and smiling.

“Oh, that’s a good one,” Twilight sarcastically remarked, getting up onto all four hooves. “Now give it here!” She enveloped the slushy in the same glow as before and tried to pull it away.

“No! I ain’t done yet!” I shouted, gripping the drink and pulling away.

“Neither was I!” She yelled back, increasing the strength of her spell.

“Oh, how rude of me. Where are my manners?” I sarcastically said through clenched teeth as we still struggled for possession of the drink. “You want this slushy?” I asked the unicorn in a much more calm and reserved tone, feigning concern.

“I WANT IT!” She bellowed as she got ready to lunge on me, loosening her magic on the cup to begin her attack. Thinking quickly, I grabbed the donut she didn’t finish and held it in front of her.

“Fine, but finish your lunch fi—!” I snatched my fingers away as she devoured the donut in one bite.

“Now give me the slushy!” She shouted with a mouthful of donut, jumping onto me and reaching her fore hooves towards the slushy as I raised it high in the air. I used my free hand to lift her up and gently set her back down on the other side of the bench.

“Y’know what? How about we share, like we were supposed to?” I asked, finally realizing that we were behaving in a way that might attract attention and may have already done so.

“Humph! Fine with me, but no funny business,” Twilight apprehensively replied, eyeing me up like I was a crime suspect. With that, I set the cup down onto the bench as we simultaneously wrapped our lips around a straw, not caring which one was whose, and each took a long enough drink of it to finish it in one gulp to make sure neither of us got more than the other. Bad move on both our parts.

“Ahh, t-too f-fast…!” I rasped as I clutched my forehead with one hand and shivering.

“Ow ow ow ow owww…!” Twilight whispered frantically, also shivering and rubbing her hooves on her head again.

“Hey, sir! You okay over there?” A stranger from across the park asked, apparently seeing me in my agonized state. I almost panicked as I saw him running towards me.

“Twilight, hide…!” I whispered. She quickly complied, but due to spur-of-the-moment thinking, she ducked behind the black book bag rather than teleporting into it. Not a second later, the stranger, a big, burly-looking guy with a basketball jersey and jean-shorts came to us, looking surprisingly concerned.

“You alright? I seen you grabbin’ ya head,” the stranger stated.

“I’m good. Jus’ a li’l bit of brain freeze from this slushy,” I replied, pointing to the empty cup, but then realized that there were two straws in it.

“Aww, shit…!” I thought.

“How come there’s two straws in it?” The stranger asked with a look of slight confusion. I stammered trying to find a reasonable response when I suddenly heard fake barking sounds coming from behind the book bag. I resisted the urge to face palm, instead letting out a sharp exhale and pinching the bridge of my nose. Surely enough, Twilight leapt from behind the bag, putting on the best “I’m suddenly a dog” impression she could.

“What the hell? This yo dog?” The stranger asked, flat-out bewildered at this point.

“Umm… yeah, my dog,” I uneasily answered. “She’s uh… in costume right now because we just came from… a dog show… down at the convention center…” I lied.

“Oh, aight… Dat costume lookin’ mad real, though… She cute!” The stranger complimented.

“Thanks!” I said, grabbing Twilight and hugging her as she sporadically barked like a puppy. “Her name’s… Sparkles. I call her that ‘cuz she brings a uh… sparkle to my life,” I semi-lied, pasting a goofy smile on my face while scratching “Sparkles” behind her ear. Twilight then found it necessary to suddenly lick the left side of my face. Her big, cold, wet, slushy-stained tongue slowly dragging up my face nearly froze me in place. Not from how freezing, sticky, and sopping wet it was, but from the shock. I stared straight ahead, but I swore I felt strands of her pony saliva droop as they still connected the unicorn’s tongue to my cheek.

“Aww, da’ss cute,” the stranger said with admiration, not noticing my slack-jawed, wide-eyed stupor. “I’mma leave y’all ta do ya thang. Take care uh Sparkles now!” The stranger hollered as he ran, seeming to be in a rush. I quickly fixed my face into a forced smile as I held up a peace sign as my goodbye to the man, and waited until he faded from view before turning to the lavender unicorn beside me.

“Twilight… What the heck was that?” I asked her, still in disbelief from that performance she put on.

“What? You DID say that if anypony— err, I mean anyBODY saw us, I was supposed to act like a dog,” she replied in defense.

“Yeah, that, but… I mean when you decided to LICK MY FACE… like an ice cream cone… W-What was that?”

“Oh! That… I thought that it… was necessary. You know, to make the ‘I’m a dog’ thing more… believable,” she explained with a blushing, toothy grin. I stared skeptically at her for a moment and then turned away in thought.

“That’s... actually pretty smart, now that I think about it. Good work!” I praised.

“Thank you,” She began. “But I have a question for you.”

“Shoot.”

“Did… did you mean it when you said I… ‘bring a sparkle to your life?’ I-I mean I’d totally understand if you were only saying that as a necessary response, given that we were both under press—!” Twilight rambled, seemingly flustered by her own question.

“Yes,” I nonchalantly interrupted. Twilight’s eyes widened and gleamed when she heard my answer. To say her smile was heart-warming would be a gross understatement.

“Really?? How?”

“…you really gon’ make me explain it?” I asked in a somewhat whining tone, shooting her a look of somber lethargy. Her look of enthusiastic anticipation convinced me of her answer. “*sigh*… well, it ain’t every day that someone pops up from another universe, for one… and everything about you I seen up to this point has been cutely— scratch that, ADORABLY entertainin’, to say the least. You only been here for a day, and I already feel like we been friends for years… and I guess… I guess I kinda enjoy bein’ the one to show you the ropes uh this world. You’re somethin’ else, Twilight Sparkle.” I smiled warmly at her, placing a hand on her head and slowly running it down her mane and back. She reacted the same way as before, relaxing her body and sitting down as she let out a pleased sigh.

“Mmm, that feels incredible, Ty…” She dreamily said.

“’Ty?’ She already has a nickname for me. How cute...”

“Y’know, I wanted to ask: Why do y—?”

“Oh, my god! A pony!” yelled someone from across the street, alarming me, but interesting Twilight. This person was a somewhat heavyset man wearing a butter-yellow T-shirt with the word “Yay!” inscribed on it in pink, blue jeans, and a pair of sneakers. He came barreling towards us with such speed and such a look of excitement on his face that it almost looked cartoonish…