Home Shenanigans!

Home Shenanigans!

I awoke with a stretch and a yawn, and took a look at my window to see that the sun had barely risen. I motioned to get up, but stopped when I felt something— or somePONY holding me down.

“Oh, yeah…” I tiredly said, not fully awake. “Hey, Twilight. Wakey wakey…” I quietly sang as I tapped her on the tip of her horn with a finger. That surely woke me up, because the moment my finger made contact, I felt a sudden, strong electric shock in my hand, accompanied by a loud *POP*. I flinched violently as I snatched my hand back. “SHIT…!” I rasped, shaking my now oddly-smoking hand.

“Hmm, good morning, Ty…” Twilight greeted with a smile, yawning and stretching before lifting herself partly off of me, still sitting on my stomach. “Hey, what’s wrong with your hand? Does it still hurt from yesterday?”

“Not from yesterday…” I responded, flexing my tingling fingers as I rose. “You never told me your horn hurt so much while you was asleep…”

“Oh… Sorry. When a unicorn dreams, his or her horn involuntarily surges with energy. How much energy it surges with depends on the vividness and strength of the dream. I was having an awesome one, too. It’s pretty unwise to touch the horn of a sleeping unicorn, y’know.”

“Now you tell me… Which reminds me: You owe me an explanation of your world and what goes on there.”

“You’re right… but just like how it was better for you to show me a little bit of this world, how’s about I see if I can take you to Equestria for a bit myself?”

“Awesome!”

“But not before you give me a little more information about this world. That, and take a look at my notes and answer the questions I wrote in it.”

“Fair ‘nuff. What, did you want to go back to the city?”

“No, no… This time, I just want to get a better idea of what a typical home looks like here.”

“I thought you said you had this house and its immediate surroundings down packed…?”

“I do… but only the outside, the bathroom, this room, and your kitchen. I’ve yet to get a full tour of the inside of this house.”

“You got a point. Okay, le’ss wash up and then I’ll show you.” After we cleaned ourselves up and I lazily threw on a black t-shirt and a pair of black basketball shorts with large red stripes going down the sides, I gave her a quick tour of the house, showing her every room upstairs and downstairs as I briefly described their purposes. She already knew most of everything I was talking about, which seemed to make this pointless. Afterwards, we went back into my room.

“I see that homes in this world are almost exactly like homes in Equestria, except for the big black boxes in some of the rooms…” Twilight said.

“What, you mean the Televisions, cable boxes, modem, router, and video game systems?” I asked as I sat back down on the bed.

“If that’s what those boxes with the lights on them are called, then yes. Kind of like the ones in this room I saw when I first came here. What do they even do?”

“Well basically, one of them shows images that people record on these things called cameras, while the other one creates images of its own, which are able to be manipulated by something called a controller. The images the second box produces are only able to be seen when it is connected to the first box with wires. See where I’m gettin’ at?” She stared at me, completely bewildered like I was speaking another language. “…I see that all I managed to do was discombobulate you. Awright, time for a demonstration.” I turned on the TV, which brought up a channel showing highlights from last week’s NBA basketball games. “Now are ya startin’ to get it?”

“Whoa…! I thought you humans weren’t capable of magic. How’d you get those other humans stuck inside of there?” Twilight asked in shock.

“This has nothin’ to do with magic,” I explained. “And these guys ain’t trapped inside of the TV. What you’re seein’ right now is a series of movin’ images that were recorded, kind of like how you record memories into your brain, and projected through this TV, as well as any other TV that people want to have the same images projected through. Get it now?”

“I… I understand enough to get what you’re saying,” Twilight stated with uncertainty. “But it still sounds like magic to me. Especially since you mentioned how this is similar to recording memories. Also, we have cameras in Equestria, but the images they capture aren’t nearly as… well-defined as this appears to be. They especially don’t move quite so fluently, either. I’m additionally surprised to see that sports like basketball exist here.”

“…Really now? Equestria seems to be lackin’ in terms of technological advances… But then, you ponies have magic and/or natural flight abilities to make up for it, while we humans do not. Here, people have invented new things to make life easier, and are still doin’ so this very day.”

“Ahh… So much to learn, yet so little time…” the unicorn murmured.

“Anything else you’d like to see before we get to your notes?”

“Hmm… yes. I’d like to see how this second box of yours works…”

“Okey doke,” I said as I turned on my Xbox 360 and handed Twilight the controller. When the intro for the system came on, she was astounded. Her jaw hung open in amazement. She had such a look of childlike enthusiasm on her face that I couldn’t help but laugh a little. After the intro was done, the game system went through its usual motions of reading the disc inside, then going to the dashboard with the message *Meesta Blackmon has signed into Xbox LIVE* inscribed on the bottom of the screen.

“Meesta Blackmon? Who is that?” Twilight asked as she enveloped the controller in her magic.

“That’s uh… the name I use when I play,” I answered with a sheepish chuckle.

“Interesting…” She said as she twirled the controller, enveloped in her magic and hovering, around while examining it.

“This thing is used for entertainment purposes. Would you like to play a game?”

“Sure…”

“Okay, I’ll start you off with somethin’ simple…” I said as I took the controller from her to find and load up a game called “Super Meat Boy.”

“Super… Meat Boy?” Twilight asked, perplexed.

“Yep. It’s a simple run-and-jump game about a sentient cube of meat trying to rescue his lady friend that only needs you to press three buttons out of the 20-somethin’ on this controller. It’s a great start for you!” I told her as the game loaded up. One extravagantly cartoonish scene after another later, I put Twilight right into the game. I gave her the controller and allowed the game itself to teach her how to play. I have to admit, I was more eager to see how she’d even play the game without fingers, but she somehow managed. She simply laid the controller down on the ground and pushed the buttons with the tips of her fore-hooves. As for her performance, she did quite well for her first time, quickly getting the hang of the game’s simple mechanics. She made a few mistakes here and there, but her hoof work was incredible. It was almost like she had fingers. She cleared the first 20 levels in the game with no problem.

“These ‘video games’ are pretty fun!” She exclaimed. “But this one’s a little too… easy for me. Got anything a bit more challenging?”

“Oh, is that so? How about we up the ante a little…?” I said with a mischievous grin. “Press the blue X button.” She did so, and the world map in the game changed from a peaceful forest setting to one where everything was on fire, and none of the levels showed that they were complete. “Hard mode activated.”

“Oh, so you don’t think I can handle something a little more challenging, huh?” Twilight asked. “Well, Ty, prepared to be proven wrong.” I knew she’d be eating those words in a few minutes. As I expected, the amount of times I saw her mess up rose dramatically. She was determined to surprise me, however. Especially because I couldn’t hold in my snickering at every time she died in the game. She grunted, groaned, and complained at each mistake she’d made that wound up sending Meat Boy flying into a buzz saw or falling into a bottomless pit and being forced to restart the level. At one point, her horn was glowing as if she was going to blow up my TV. She eventually got stuck on a level for a good 20 minutes before she finally rage quit.

“I’m glad YOU’RE having a good time over there!” she yelled, her mane frazzled with stress.

“I-I’m sorry, Twi! But I w-was hopin’ you’d p-prove me wrong!” I choked out through fits of laughter. She growled at me.

“You know what? Why don’t YOU give this headache of a game a try?”

“Sure, I’ll humor you. I’mma make this look easy, too. And I’m gonna start from the first level.” I boasted. Surely enough, I made it through level after level, not making as many mistakes as Twilight did… that is, until I got to the level she’d gotten stuck on, where I’d gotten stuck on it almost twice as long as she did.

“Grr… Dammit…!” I angrily rasped as I died for the umpteenth time. I could hear the purple unicorn laughing at my hypocrisy, but I did my best to tune it out as I died again and again. “Oh, my F—…! Daaah, come on!” I complained, finding a ridiculous excuse for every time I screwed up in the game. With a stroke of luck, I eventually managed to beat the level I was stuck on.

“See? Makin’ it look easy!” I proclaimed with a false triumphant smile. The vein protruding from my forehead told a different story.

“Ha! You look about as angry as I was,” Twilight responded through her laughter. “If not angrier.”

“Nah, yo! I swear your laughin’ was messin’ me up!” I brazenly lied, making the unicorn laugh even harder as she went belly-up on the floor. I took a deep breath to calm myself down. “You know what? Take this!” I playfully said as I poked her belly. She flinched, but was still laughing.

“Don’t do that! I’m ticklish!” She said as she giggled.

“Oh, well you shouldn’t-a told me that,” I replied as I got off of the bed and onto the floor to give her the old tickle torture.

“No! W-wait! Ple-he-he-he-ase!” She begged. I ignored her pleas as I tickled her into tears of laughter. A few seconds of tickling later, I saw her horn light up, followed by the magenta-colored glow enveloping me.

“WHOA!” I screamed as I flew into the air and crashed on my bed. “I take it you don’t like being tickled…?” I asked with a chuckle.

“Not… at… all…” Twilight answered, out of breath. “That was fun... and I think… I’ve gotten enough information to suit me… for now, anyway. Now, let’s… look at the notebook."

“Aight. Bring it here,” I said, prompting Twilight to fetch the notebook from inside of the book bag on the floor. She tossed it to me with a hoof and hopped onto the bed with me. I quickly flipped through the pages of the book to see that she managed fill up almost every page (front and back) with neatly organized cursive handwriting (or, hoof-writing… or something like that). I whistled in amazement as I closed the book.

“That’s a lotta notes an' questions… And you wrote it all in cursive... Amazing.”

“I’m a very studious mare, Ty. Had we gone beyond that big city and not had those little run-ins, I’d probably have had a lot more.”

“Right… sorry about that,” I glumly said, rubbing the back of my head.

“It’s fine. Besides, that whole day was really fun!” Twilight said with cheer. “Now, as for my questions…”

“Okey doke,” I agreed, reopening the notebook to the first page. “Let’s see here… ‘What are those big shiny things with the wheels on them…?’ Those, my dear lavender friend, are ‘cars.’”

“Cars?” Twilight asked with a head tilt.

“Yeah. They are a method of transportation for us humans. The average human can only run at a speed somewhere between 6 and 10 miles per hour. Cars are able to move more than ten times that speed.”

“Ohh, I see! They’re like carriages, but without the need for ponies— or ‘humans’ to pull them!”

“Exactly! Also, the terms that apply to humans are ‘person’ for singular, and ‘people’ for plural. Now what else do you have here…” I asked as I searched through the book for more questions. Thank goodness this pony had a whole lot more notes than questions, which I assume meant that she was able to answer the majority of her own questions during the trip. “Ahh, here’s one… ‘What is a human’s diet…?’ Well, Twi, most humans are omnivores.”

“Omnivores? Wow, that type of diet is extremely rare amongst citizens of Equestria! All ponies are herbivores, but some of the animals we have there, such as dragons and maticores, are carnivorous.”

“So mythological creatures actually exist there, huh? Interestin’… Okay, next… ‘Whose job is it to change the weather in this world?’… That’s a weird one. The weather changes completely on its own here.” The unicorn’s eyes widened in shock.

“Seriously?? In my world, the Pegasi, which is the plural term for Pegasus in case you were wondering, are totally responsible for everything weather-related but the movement of the sun and moon.”

“Ya don’t say? How bizarre…” I murmured as I gave her a confused look. “Anyway, what’s next…? Ah; ‘Is there a ruler of America? If so, are they a deity?’ Yes, there technically is a ruler of America, but not in sense of a dictator or monarch. Here, we have a President, tons of government officials, and a voting system that allows the general population to choose who they want as leader. And no, they are not a deity. They are just as human as I am. In fact, I personally don’t believe there is such a thing as a ‘god’ of any kind in this world. But, there are many others throughout this planet that follow many various philosophies, theories, and everything in between on the existence of a god, or of many gods. It’s pretty complicated, Twi.” She stared at me with a most intense look of bewilderment.

“…wow,” She finally managed to squeak out. “I am familiar with the type of government you’re talking about, as Ponyville, the town I live in, has a mayor who has the same types of officials under her, as well as being chosen by the citizens of the town, but… the possible nonexistence of a supreme ruler…? I can’t even begin to fathom what that would be like… Not to mention what you said about there being different paths of thought on the existence of one or more… mind-blowing, to say the least. In Equestria, we have two Goddesses ruling over our fair land. They are also Princesses, so they have very strong influence on all kinds of things, from international relations, to simple laws and rules in each city in Equestria.”

“I see… Okay, one more before we make the trip. That sound good?”

“Why stop so soon?” Twilight asked, showing a bit of disappointment.

“I’ll look through and answer more questions later if you want. Besides, from the looks of the notes you took, you seem to be very good at answerin’ your own questions,” I assured. “I’m mainly lookin’ for questions that your notes may not answer for you. Now let’s see here… ‘Who raises the sun and moon in this world?’ Kind of an odd one… Well, Twi, I will tell you that the moon moves all by itself, and that the sun don’t move at all; instead, this planet moves around the sun!”

“WHAT??” Twilight asked with extreme shock. “But… how?? That can’t be scientifically possible!”

“Oh, but it is… What, do your Princess/Goddesses move the sun and moon around in your world?” I asked sarcastically, smirking.

“Well… yeah, actually. One is known as Princess Celestia, the Goddess of the Sun and Daylight. The other is known as Princess Luna, the Goddess of the Moon and Night. I'm actually a student directly under Princess Celestia. She's taught me everything I know about magic, and in turn, I study the magic of friendship and report my findings to her. This little detour has proven rich in valuable information, and it's all thanks to you, Ty!” My smirk dropped immediately into an idiotic slack-jawed stare.

“…we’re goin’ to Equestria,” I said in a dramatically low, deep voice. I had forgotten to eat or even put on shoes due to my excitement for going to another world— no, another UNIVERSE. “Let’s go!” I said with noticeable excitement. “Oh, and bring the notebook with you so I can answer any questions you have about this world while we’re in yours.” Twilight nodded in agreement as she grabbed her notebook.

“Alright. I'm not entirely sure this spell will work the same way as it did when it brought me here, and it may take a bit more concentration, seeing as I'm bringing you along with me. Cross your... fingers, and prepare to be amazed!” Twilight announced as she placed a hoof on my leg and picked the notebook up in her mouth as she powered up her horn, and with a *POOF*, we were gone…