Regret

Equestria was now the world of darkness and hatred. War with King Sombra and Queen Chrysalis had caused an outbreak of several ponies leaving their families for the war. Hundreds and thousands of pony blood being shed every last minute, with a very low chance of anyone to survive the massacre of war.

This world will never be the same, at least for me, anyway. It's been 4 months since I killed my closest friend, which I dare not to speak the name of. I have many wounds and cuts over my patches of missing skin. I do not wish to remove them. Why?

I want to suffer because of what I did.

...

Rainbow Dash walked along the interior of her new home she shared with Fluttershy. It was the only safe place where they would not get harmed of the war happening outside of the sanctuary. There was of course no excuse of peace of this place, however. Screams could be heard outside from the terror of losing lives. Fluttershy never dared to look outside, so Dash had removed the windows. Dash had fought in the war a few moons ago for a short while, which was the evidence of cuts and scratches over her pelt. She didn't tell Fluttershy, for she would be terrified.

The blue mare walked over to the terrified yellow pegasus to calm her down for the screams. She was in her bed, her head digging into the one wooden bed they shared, to attempt block out the noise. It was no use, however, the ponies were right above their heads from the underground room. She hid her whole body inside the blanket to feel more safe.

With Dash listening to the high pitched wails and moans of her friend, she brought a candlelight over to her side. The illuminating fire always warmed her up and calmed her down. It also distracted her from the hunger pains from scarce food around the area. The only food they had was stale bread and rotten apples. Water was also very hard to search for, despite the groundwater from the rainfall overnight.

Rainbow Dash began to speak softly to the terrified pegasus before her, keeping her calm and reducing her cries. It was a stab in the heart to Dash to go through this every night, like taking care of a newborn filly who cries nonstop. She dreaded and despised seeing her closest soulmate go through a tough time with horror every second of the night. Good thing she had her by her side.

"It's okay, Fluttershy," she whispered. "I'm right here, there's nothing to worry about." Fluttershy calmed down from Dash's comfort, with helped her when she was afraid. She spoke into her ear again. "The war will be over soon, I promise. Soon Equestria will be back to normal, a place of love and friendship."

Fluttershy began to respond with her cracked voice softly. "B-but the others... T-they're all d-dead.... I c-can't take it..."

Dash calmed her down once more. "Shh. It's okay. We can make it through this. And I promise never to take you out there."

Fluttershy eventually had fallen asleep, and Dash gotten it the bed with her. She covered her  soft, yellow ears with spare earmuffs to drown out the noise. She would rather go through hearing the screams through her sleep than her terrified friend. She couldn't bare to think of her having nightmares.

...

Sirens of alert for battle awoke the two the next morning. They felt footsteps among the ceiling, making the whole room shake. Fluttershy was terrified once more, but she calmed down eventually. They were both starving of hunger, but lucky for them somepony dropped a few vegetables when running into the ground. Dash retrieved them before washing them with clean rain water.

After having a few bites to eat, Dash stored the excess food and water into a crate that Fluttershy had taken from her cottage. They both had brought basic objects of need to keep themselves alive. Fluttershy brought crates for storage, blankets for warmth, and two tubs for bathing in. Dash had gathered a wooden bed, a few pillows, spare water, fruits and vegetables, and some nightstands. They both did their part in making sure they were there for each other.

As time passed, the two had gotten bored. There was nothing to do in the sanctuary below the surface. Dash was suffering of bordem, but Fluttershy loved the quiet and enjoyed the few minutes of scilence.

Dash waited no longer to speak in front of her. "Fluttershy," she spoke with no holding back. "I'm going to go outside for a few minutes," she said. "Don't worry, I'll be right above you."

Fluttershy worried for her friend. "But what about the army? The changlings may come to Ponyville from the Everfree Forest!" She waited for a response after a few minutes of dead scilence.

"I'll be okay," Dash muttered. "Please don't worry, something is up and I want to find out."

"But-"

Before Fluttershy could finish her sentence of warning, Dash headed out from the entrance she had made when they both arrived in their new home. After tons of twisting and turning, she could see a faint light from outside, and headed out.

She was shocked to see the new Ponyville. Thousands of dirt piles lied among the ground. The sky was a pale blue with many faint clouds covering Celestia's illuminating sun. Sevral blood marks remained from the last occurring battle with Sombra's army. Every house was barricaded with absolutely nopony living here. She could not have imagined it being this way.

With tons of caution, she flew to take a closer observance of the remains of the town. She tried her best to find any source of food, for she had little left. All of the shops in town square were demolished from changiling attacks. It was impossible to find food. She turned around to head back home.

When Dash turned around, she saw many of Sombra's soldiers attacking. She flew as fast as the speed of sound to get away into the sky. Luckily for her, they were all earth ponies. Searching from above, she tried to find her secret entrance to her home. It took a little while, but she located it after the soldiers were gone. She headed back inside very quickly.

She stepped inside, only to find Fluttershy traumatized from the shaking of the ground, with a few scratches on her legs. Dash was in shock and ran to her.

"FLUTTERSHY? ARE YOU ALRIGHT?"

The yellow mare did not speak, but only wailed with tears in both of her beautiful turquoise eyes. Dash quickly gathered some water and gently rubbed it on the wounds and scratches. She wrapped her hoof in one of the cloths she had found. Fluttershy calmed down after a few minutes of endless cries of terror.

In the late, cold night, Dash had found her old war armor from those short moons ago. Immediately after she had set her eyes upon the golden chestplate, memories came flowing back to her of blood, screams, and flames of destruction. She was having second thoughts of joining the helpless ponies from above into battle for peace and prosperity.

Fluttershy came from the back of the blue mare, vision still blurry from blood loss. She gazed at the determined pegasus' emotion, wondering if she acctully was coming back to fight to leave her all alone.

"I....see you're busy right now," whispered Fluttershy, slightly flinching Dash back to the real world. "But..are you having second thoughts about the war?"

Dash quickly turned around to her roommate, and couldn't get the words out of her dry mouth. She knew by instinct that Fluttershy would never forgive her for what she was about to do, but she had to help somehow.

"I'm sorry..."

Dash quickly but on the rusty armor and rushed outside, leaving Fluttershy helplessly sitting on the ground. Her eyes were overflowing with tears, wimpering with sadness of watching the rainbow mare fly away. She didn't know if she would return or not. Weather the case, she started packing up the crates.

...

Dash moved her wings in the air as fast as she could, fighting back the changelings swarming the area. Most of the army were already tied up from the ooze the swarm produced, but plenty of backup came shortly after. The swarm noticed the Dash was only one of the few pegasi in the crowd, and swarmed in an orbital path around her. She fought back by reflex, kicking the black creatures into the ground.

With time, the battle soon died down, and Dash decided to check in on Fluttershy. It seemed she was not clear of her absence, for she wouldn't leave for eternity.

...

Dash came back, seeing Fluttershy packing up most of what was in the house. Dash misunderstood what she was trying to do. It only took a few seconds to realize her actions.

She was moving out.

"Fluttershy..." Dash stood quietly, in total shock of the yellow mare. "You don't have to do this.."

Just when she was filling up with tension, Fluttershy turned to her gaze and yelled so loudly that the room shook as if there were an earthquake.

"OH STOP IT, WILL YOU! YOU PROMISED ME THAT YOU WOULD NEVER LEAVE MY SIDE, AND LOOK WHAT YOU DID! IF YOU WERE GOING TO LEAVE, THEN TELL ME!"

Dash was infuriated at her friend's words, and could do nothing but yell back.

"SHUT UP! I TRIED TO HURRY OUT SO I WOULDN'T HEAR ANY OF YOUR CRYING! I AM SICK OF LIVING WITH YOU ALREADY!"

Fluttershy ignored Dash's insults, and spoke once more, this time louder.

"THEN WHY DON'T YOU JUST LEAVE!"

Dash did the same, but then prepared her legs in a bucking position, readying her muscles for attack.

"NO! YOU'RE LEAVING!"

Dash kicked the poor pegasus, making many splatters of dark red blood emerge over the chest of Fluttershy. She was in unbearable pain, crying with many tears. Dash paid no attention to the wails of suffering and kicked harder and faster. Blood was everywhere, some sticking to the back of her flank. Fluttershy tried very hard to get up with damaged hooves, face and intestines, but Dash kept on kicking. It seemed like forever until all the blood was smeared across the entire wall, and Fluttershy's wails died down and no longer breathing the intoxicating smell of freshly spilled blood.

She was dead.

Dash's overwhelming stress overcame her senses, but soon died down after seeing what she had done. She had murderd her best friend. She cried loudly and filled with shame at the sight of Fluttershy's dead corpse on the ground. Blood and organs made a huge mess around the small room. She looked no more, and found a scroll and ink. She began to write.

From this day forth, I will harm myself.

This was yet to be her new mantra, or in some cases punishment for her evil deed. She thought no more of sparing herself, and reached out her weapon and cut herself, making patches of missing skin emerge.

...

4 months had passed, with Dash still regretting what she did. She was back fighting in the war, but rarely attacking back foes. This would get her more wounds. Every time she gets asked for healing them, she rejects. She will go on like this until the day she dies.

She did not want to die, however, for she wanted to suffer as long as possible for Fluttershy. She knew that she had to pay for death.

Death comes at a cost, and Dash remembers that well.