The Sort of Great Escape

by DiamondStar4242

Rating: everyone
Tags: Comedy, Bon-Bon, Random, Adventure, Lyra, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Cherry Jubilee
Length: 1082

Lyra kidnaps Bon Bon. Super secret spy stuff ensues.

After Cranky and Matilda's wedding Lyra comes home and kidnaps her marefriend.
Spoiler!: She escapes
Lyra is soooooo dead

Published 2016-03-29 01:00:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-03-29 01:00:01 UTC

The One Where Everypony Hates Lyra

Lyra opened the door to their room and trotted in quietly. All the lights were off, indicating that someone had retired for the day. She chuckled softly. It was just like Bon Bon to go to bed early without kissing her goodnight.

"Bonnie? Are you here?"

Somewhere in the room, she heard a snort of somepony being startled awake. Grinning, she walked toward the noise. "It's just me"

Bon Bon groaned and switched on the lights. "Lyra? What were you doing out so late?"

Lyra shrugged nonchalantly. "I was just taking a walk. You know how I need to clear my head sometimes. Plus, I'm not the only one who's out all the time."

The mint-green unicorn stared at her marefriend pointedly. "What about you secret agent business?" she asked with hoof quotes to prove her point.

Bon Bon yawned and sighed. "We talked about this, cookie. Just c'mere, I need a snuggle." Lyra giggled like a filly and hopped over to the groggy candy-maker.

"That was one great wedding, right Lyra? Cranky and Matilda are meant for each other. So what do you want to do? I could get out the special coffee..."

Nearing the bed, Lyra grinned slyly. "I don't know Bonnie... Maybe it would be better for you to go back to sleep..."

Lyra quickly jumped on Bon Bon, putting her in a strong choke hold. In her other hoof she held a blue hoofkerchief that smelled sickly sweet. Bon Bon's eyes widened, as she struggled against Lyra's grip. "Ly..ra What..."

The unicorn on top of her smirked. "You're not the only one who's deep cover here in Ponyville honey." Before Bon Bon could react, Lyra shoved the chloroform onto her muzzle. "G'night, love" Her eyes rolled back, and she slumped against her captor, unconscious.

2 Hours later...

Lyra threw her bouncy ball against the wall for the 54th time, and sighed. She could hear arguing from the other room. It was probably Bonnie and the guard.

"Nonono I want to see her now. When she gets here I'm going to kick her ass all the way to Tartarus, you hear me? Tell her I'm not mad about the freaking oats, but if she doesn’t come here right now, she's sleeping on the couch tonight. What do you mean she doesn’t want to see me? I can hear her bouncy ball against the wall. She's bored out of her skull! Ugh she's being stubborn as hell."

Lyra chuckled at the rough voice that she used for intimidation. Bon Bon was one tough cookie, but one thing was certain: she knew Lyra like the back of her hoof.

"What are you talking about? Do I look like a give a damn about the bugbear right now? I. WANT. TO. SEE. MY. MAREFRIEND." she said through clenched teeth.

Lyra heard a clank, and a loud shriek sounding from the other room. The lyrist sighed and threw her ball to the side, teleporting into the room next door.

"Bon Bon? Did you knock out the guard?" she asked with a twinge of annoyance in her voice. Bon Bon huffed and glared at the unicorn in front of her, ignoring the guard that lay bleeding on the ground.

"Finally! What's a mare gotta do around here to get some attention?"

Lyra sighed and looked at the unconscious guard behind her disappointedly. "I wish the security here was a little better."

Bon Bon raised an eyebrow at her. "You assigned just one guard to my room? I thought you knew me better than that, cookie."

Lyra growled. "Stop calling me that! Didn’t you hear me? I was deep cover here for the enemy Bonnie! We released the bugbear that shut down your entire agency! You should hate my guts." Bon Bon stared at her, indifferent, as Lyra ranted.

"Are you done?" she asked. Lyra thought for a moment and nodded. Bon Bon smiled. "Wonderful!" Suddenly, the wall behind her exploded.

The candy maker/spy jumped on to a pink helicopter as Lyra stared in awe. The mint-green mare narrowed her eyes, ready to follow in close pursuit but it was too late. The helicopter took off with Bon Bon inside.

The pilot turned around and took off her flight goggles, blue eyes sparkling. "OOOH! That was great!" Pinkie Pie exclaimed as Bon Bon dusted herself off.

"So how does it feel to be captured?" she asked. The earth pony chuckled, "Interesting, actually. Thanks for the favor Pinkie." The baker saluted with a goofy smile.

Bon Bon sat down with an intense look on her face. Pinkie looked at her worriedly. "What are you going to do now?" Bon Bon sighed and shrugged. "I'm probably on top of their hit list now. So I'm gonna do the only thing I can do: Disappear"

Lyra paced around the empty room and groaned. “Boss is going to literally kill me, if Bon Bon doesn’t get to me first. How could I have let this happen?”

Sparkler came up behind her and yanked Lyra’s mane back, roughly whispering something in her ear. Lyra’s eyes widened and she nodded weakly. Sparkler levitated her up and threw her to the ground before walking away.

“Boss wants to see you”

She shivered when she thought back to her first encounter with that mare. It was a nightmare. She ran down the hall and knocked softly on the boss’s room.

“Come in!” Her hoof trembled slightly as she opened the ornate golden door to her death. Cherry Jubilee smiled warmly at the sight of Lyra Heartstrings.

“Why, helloooo Lyra, my dear. Aren’t we lookin’ fit as fiddle today?” The unicorn nodded and managed smile, scraping her hoof against the hard marble floor.

“Now then, let’s get ta business shall we? You let a prisoner escape, blew up a wall of this building, failed your mission, and wasted my precious time is that right?” Lyra nodded meekly.

Cherry Jubilee’s face hardened and she slammed a hoof against her desk. “Talk ta me when you answer my question!”

Lyra froze. “Y-yess Miss Jubilee.” She blurted.

Ms. Jubilee frowned deeply. “GET THIS FILTHY MARE OUT OF MY SIGHT!” she yelled suddenly, making Lyra pee a little. A cold aura surrounded her and she was thrown, head-first into a wall.

Author's Note

So.... yeah
It was 3 am, I had no coffee, I had no sleep
Don't judge me.
I can see your accusing eyes piercing my soul