Life in the Castle

by Darklordcomp

1: Fanfiction

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It was a lovely day at Canterlot Castle.

Celestia lay comfortably on a large pillow in the middle of her private lounge sipping tea by the fire. She savored every drop of the precious liquid, making sure to produce the royal slurping sound as she sipped from the edge of the fine china. This was her daily ritual after setting the sun for the day, taking a reprieve from the stresses of the life of a princess.

Eating cake was quite stressful, after all. Very special care had to be take to ensure that no crumbs fell into the carpet below, or worse, her chest fur. It would be rather uncouth for a royal princess to be seen licking her breast. All efforts and precautions were necessary to prevent such an occurrence.

But now that all cake related incidents had been avoided for the day, Celestia reveled in the peace and quiet of a steaming cup and a crackling fire.

Suddenly, a familiar fwooshing sound, accompanied by a green glow and followed by a pop, interrupted her dignified slurping.

Celestia groaned. "Oh, come on! I was just settling in, Twilight! Can't it wait?"

Snapping the seal on the letter, Celestia glanced at the heading. "Ugh, another friendship lesson." Crumpling the paper and tossing it into the fire, Celestia readjusted herself in her cushion in an attempt to make herself comfortable once more. Pulling out a quill and parchment, she composed a quick response.

Dearest Twilight,

Your words give me warmth on cold nights such as these. Keep up the good work.

Signed,

Princess Celestia

Sending the letter off in a green flame of her own, Celestia turned to Philomena, who was on a perch cleaning her feathers. "Remind me to recast the messaging spell so that it leads directly into the fire, will you?"

Philomena gave a quick nod in response and returned to her preening.

"Thank you." And with that, Celestia returned to her restful slurping session.


A loud crackle called Luna's attention from her evening coffee. A small crumpled paper bounced a short distance from her fireplace.

Luna gasped, clapping her hooves together. "Eeeeee! New material!" she said before practically bouncing over her desk towards the letter.

Opening it up, she quickly scanned it, her excitement increasing as she read. "OOOoooh!! This is perfect! Now, where is my notebook~... ?"

Dancing over to her desk, she pulled a large leather bound book out of a magically sealed drawer. Slapping it on the desk with a smile, she ran her hoof across the gilded lettering that read Fanfic Ideas. Opening to a blank page, Luna slid the uncrumpled letter into the crease, pulled out a quill, and began scribbling in her notebook.

"Alright, we've got Applejack and Twilight Sparkle... hm hmm~... walks in on her bathing... da, da-da daaa~... blah, blah, words~... now kiss..."

The page quickly filled up as a friendship lesson about respecting privacy was translated into a saucy plot full of saucy plots.

When Luna had filled the page, she stood back and looked it over a few times before finally putting her quill away. "Perfect. Now to expand this outline into a story." She looked up at the clock and frowned. "Well, after the night court, I guess."

Slapping the notebook into her desk, Luna sealed the drawer and trotted off to prepare for the busy night ahead of her.

As she was leaving her quarters, she wondered whether some future generation of ponies would take her writings to be historical, then shook her head.

"Yeah, right."