The Perfect Mate

by Lord_Evil

Rating: mature
Tags: Sex, Random, Princess Celestia, Human, Twilight Sparkle, Anthro, Princess Luna, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Comedy, Other, Romance
Length: 89038

After years of settling back into normal society, Luna requires one final thing to allow her to function properly in her every day. In short, someone who's company she enjoys that can help sate her powerful alicorn desires.

After Luna's return from her banishment and the defeat of Nightmare moon, it has taken years for the night princess to readjust to the new times. She's taken on quite the rebellious nature since then, however, with patience and understanding, she finally managed to settle. But an alicorn has needs; she wants a connection with somepony. That's right, she's looking for love and will do anything to find it. Now it is up to Celestia and Twilight to help her solve this issue. What will happen? Probably a lot of shit.
[Warning: This story will contain profanity and a very weird individual. This story is likely going to be random and may poke fun at some sensitive topics. That being said, enjoy.]
6/08/16 ((Real quick, I wanted to say thanks to all of you who have been reading, I can't believe this got posted on the home page. You guys rule!))

Published 2016-04-06 01:30:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-08-02 21:01:21 UTC

First Impressions

Ryan's vision was completely black, his body felt numb and nonexistent. It was quiet, peaceful even. Is this what being dead is like? He wondered if death was truly this peaceful, if it was then he had no idea why he didn't try it sooner. Then again, this was getting pretty boring. Scratch that last part, being dead sucks. Nothing is going on at all, it's not peaceful, it's lifeless. There is literally nothing going on! Trying to convince nuns that sex is a gateway into heaven was more entertaining than this.

Would you just wake up already!

He was stirred from his comatose-like state, only to find himself heaving and coughing up small waves of water. It hurt, like a lot, but his body didn't seem like it was about to stop until it was all out. What the hell happened?

Once Ryan had gotten as much fluid out of his lungs, and likely his stomach, as he could he started taking deep and greedy breaths. His brain could only think to compare him to a virgin being forced to deep-throat for the first time at this very moment as his chest rose and sank with purpose.

"Are you okay?" An unfamiliar voice asked him. He found this to be a bit odd, seeing how he had kinda just drowned, but then again, how long was he out? And who the hell is talking to him? Did he just float over to some random chunk of land, or was he spotted by a tuna boat?

Regardless off how he survived, he was just happy to be alive. Purgatory, or whatever the fuck that was, was too boring and uneventful for his tastes. Well, he should probably thank whoever got his ass out of the worst afterlife ever. "Yeah, I'm fine. Thanks for-Sweet, merciful Buddha! What the fuck?"

Ryan had seen some shit in his life, but this took the metaphorical, shit-stained cake. When his vision finally cleared completely, he found himself laying on his back, propped up on his elbows, and being straddled by what he hoped was at least female.

I see boobs, it's a woman.

Taking a mental sigh of relief that he wasn't about to be raped by some weird purple guy, he started focusing on the person...thing...this bitch on his lap. First off, she was purple, duh. Secondly, she had some long, but very soft looking, ears. Then there was the muzzle, that's fucking weird, and her whole body looked like it was covered in very short hair, minus her head which had some weird colors to it. Finally, there was a fucking spear on her head and a set of big ass wings on her back.

Sweet Jesus, we're in Furryland.

Ryan spotted two more people that resembled the woman on top of him in some physical attributes and mentally pleaded that his body didn't float to some secret furry city. The fear of getting raped once again flew back into his mind. He found himself soon being approached by a much darker looking woman. Her fur coat being blue and she had oddly flowing hair that looked like stars in the night sky...Damn, for a furry chick she has a fucking figure!

"Is there...some sort of problem?" The dark blue furry asked. She seemed nervous for some reason, which was weird because she was the one surrounded by her own people, so she should be just fine. If anything Ryan was the one who was supposed to be freaking out and probably running. However, he found his body was too...weighed down to move. This purple bitch may not look like much, but she's heavier than she looks.

"Umm, could you like get the hell off of me." He asked the purple furry on top of him. His request earned him a quick apology and the much appreciated freedom of having his lower body freed from her rather warm backside. Wow, he was cold. He was kind half tempted to ask her to sit back down.

Ryan rose to his feet, wrapping his arms around his own form to hug himself warm. His body shivered as he tried to raise his own external temperature. His attempts were in vain and now he just looked like a cat that had been left outside during a thunderstorm.

"Here, allow me to help you." Came another voice, this one being from a regal looking white person. Who wears thin white dresses like that? Medieval queens and hippies? His thoughts were interrupted when the pole sticking out of her cranium started glowing yellow and a towel appeared in his arms.

Ryan took a moment of silence to let the fact that a towel just seemed to show up out of thin air sink in, letting his brain take some time to register what just happened. After his moment felt as if it held its due amount of time, he asked it for confirmation that all that had just transpired was reasonable.

I-uh-I-I...uh...Moo...

Shit...

His mind instinctively, when it could not handle what had just happened, jumped to the next best thing. He was cold and he had a towel, two plus two is fish, therefore...eat the towel.

No, you retard! Dry yourself off, it's cold!

Yeah, that would probably be a good idea too. Ryan kept his mouth shut and quickly dried the water in his hair before allowing himself to be wrapped inside of the absorbent cloth. His eyes wandered back onto the three furies in front of him. It was weird how realistic their suits looked.

Whenever one of them spoke, the mouth and lips were perfectly in sync with their words. There were no noticeable zippers or gloves or lining. And, finally, their ears moved. Everything they had was so on point and the fur, despite being weird colors, looked as if it were actually coming out of them.

"Greetings and salutations; So, before anything else. Thanks for saving my ass back there." He said, not really sure what else to do in this situation. "Yeah...so where am I and who are you people?" He figured he may as well ask. Better to get to know them than just walking away. That would be just plain rude.

The group looked at each other before facing Ryan again. The first one to step up was the white one, making Ryan wonder if races were a problem here. If so, then thank god he was white and wouldn't be lynched on the spot.

Celestia was actually very surprised with how well he seemed to be taking the fact that he was standing in front of creatures that were not of his own species. Perhaps he's highly intelligent, or maybe even dealt with other species like her on a regular basis. "Good evening to you, I am Princess Celestia; Co-ruler of Equestria and Princess of the sun."

Co-ruler of what now? Ryan was fairly certain he was in the U.S. when he jumped off of that cliff and there was no way in ball-fondling hell that his body managed to float all the way to another country. At least, not without it taking several years, his body decomposing, or being eaten. In any of those cases, he would not have been able to be brought back.

Next to step up was the dark blue furry. She was dressed like a total rebel, which was kinda hot to Ryan. He loves women who go against what society see them as, it made them look powerful. He liked powerful women; someone that could beat his ass when he really deserved it. The kinda chick that you could tackle to the ground and the first words out of her mouth weren't 'Ow, stop!' they were more like 'Now you fucked up!'

Despite her tough appearance, he could see in her eyes that something was making her nervous. he might try to figure it out at some point, but introductions had to come first. "I'm Princess Luna; Co-ruler of Equestria and Princess of the night."

Wait, Princess of the day and night? This wasn't just a furry ground meeting, this was a society! A whole role playing society! While Ryan was no stranger to some role playing, he wasn't into the whole animal thing, so he probably wouldn't join, but at this point in time, he was outnumbered. Just keep playing the nice-guy card and maybe they won't cut his nuts off.

Finally the purple one, that may or may not have molested him, was taking the stand. "And my name is Twilight Sparkle. The princess of friendship." Ryan snickered a bit at this, but held his tongue as to not burst out laughing.

Princess of friendship? Really!? What kind of title is that? It sounds like some bullshit excuse just to call yourself royalty. Where's the princess of love, or hate, or even fucking bugs? Bet money there's a princess for every non-tangible thing here. Bet everyone here is probably the princess of something!

Well find the Princess of sandwiches. We haven't eaten in fourteen hours

Holy shit, it's been that long? Guess time really flies when you're running from cops, jumping to your death, dying, then being brought back to life...Holy shit, today was eventful. "I hate to ask this, but do y'all got something to eat. It's been a while and I don't really know where I am."

"Of course, right this way." Celestia replied, still beyond surprised at how well he was handling this information. She desperately wanted to know why he was so quick to accept them.

"If I may inquire;" Celestia began as she exited the room with the rest of the group following close behind her, "I'm rather shocked at how well you are absorbing everything we've told you. Why is that?"

He didn't see the harm in answering honestly, but just to be safe he would have to be careful with his words. Especially since wherever he was they were considered royalty. Jesus Christ, this place is huge. "Hey, it's your life, live it however you want. I won't judge, I've got my own little guilty pleasures."

Celestia stopped, causing everyone else to follow suit. The sun god turned around to face the human, eyeing him awkwardly. She went from thinking about how well he was handling this to wondering if he actually knew at all what was going on. "I'm sorry, but I don't quite understand what you mean."

He felt strangely inferior as this woman seemed to gaze into his soul. It was like she was an owl and he was not more than a small mouse just looking up at her like a deer in headlights. "Well, I'm just saying I'm not gonna judge you guys for being furies and whatnot. You did a hell of a job on those costumes though, I gotta say. I have a few friends who are into that kind of stuff, but none of them have come up with something this unique."

Now it was Twilight's turn to question the human as she gave him an awkward stare as well. "You think that we're in costume? Why would you think that?"

"Come on," Ryan began, "do you actually expect me to believe that you guys are some sort of anthropomorgic-whatever the fuck it's called kind of animals? That's ridiculous, things like that don't actually exist. You and I both know this, I don't see why I'm even telling you. You can drop the act."

Luna stepped forward. "Sir, I can assure you that all of this is real. I'm sure that there are even ways we could prove to you that we are not lying." Luna grabbed Ryan's arm and lead him to the window. He, being in his current state of mind, walked with her without a second thought. Upon looking out of the window his eyes went wide. He saw hundreds of people with horns wandering around this fancy town he seemed to be in.

Ryan let out a short mock laugh before reaching into his pocket and pulling out a blue pocket knife. "I'm gonna prove that this isn't real. Bet money that right now this is some weird fucking dream." He placed his hand firmly against the window and flipped the blade open with his other hand.

Luna, like a god damn ninja, grabbed the blade of out his hand with her magic just as he went to stab himself. With the blade gone he merely punched his hand, causing him to yelp slightly from the force he put behind his intentions. She watched as his mind not only processed the pain, but also that the weapon he had was gone.

He looked to his sides and soon found his knife surrounded in an odd bluish hue, floating beside Luna. The pain said this was real, but his mind was moving a miles an hour trying to find some logical explanation for all of this. Naturally, his primary survival instincts kicked in. The ones that have saved his life many times in the past and somehow managed to do so even in the face of death...

Run you dumb son of bitch!

And with that he was off, sprinting down the hallway as fast as his legs could possibly carry him. His brain was begging for answers to so many questions. Where was he, how did he get here, what baby did he punch in a past life to piss off god so much that simply sending him to hell just wasn't enough?

Never mind that! Now is not the time for questions, now is the time for running. And Ryan did just that, sprinting through corridors, not even sure what he was running from, just running because his mind told him to. Usually when he was in a state of panic, it was because someone was trying to kill him. So this was basically programmed into his brain.

He was starting to run out of breath and shoved himself through the first door he could find. However, he ended up slipping on the wet floor that just so happened to grace his feet, causing him to fall straight onto his ass and slide a couple of inches. He quickly realized that during the fall he had closed his eyes and upon opening them was greeted by the sight of a naked-"Holy shit!"

That thing is a foot long!

"What the fuck!?" Ryan had some issues with the wet floor and trying to get to his feet, but once he was up he charged out of the room and slammed the door, leaning against it to take a break and catch his breath. Upon further inspection he found a sign above the door that read 'Guard's Shower Room'.

His features sank and he slapped his hand against his head. His own stupidity fed into that brief nightmare and he knew it. He should have been paying attention. One could only assume that-"Hi there."

Ryan jumped slightly and let out a less-than-manly shriek thanks to the voice behind him. He turned around to face whoever may have found him and came face to face with a woman covered in red fur with long brown hair and wearing some weird kind of armor.

She had a rather thick accent that sounded Russian to him. "So, you are running from the princesses, no?"

"Maybe..."

"Relax, I am not here to hurt you."

"What are you here to do then?" He asked, trying to read her features to see what her actual intentions with him were.

"The princesses merely wish to speak with you, all they want is to talk."

She seemed sincere about her words, but that's just what he could read from her features. He hasn't met a lot of Russians so it was hard for him to find any faults in her voice. Naturally, he was very skeptical and on guard. "How the hell do I know y'all aren't gonna dissect me or something. You know, like how you treat all sentient beings from other worlds!"

The guard pony stared him down for a moment. What would make him think that they wanted to cut him open? Something like that isn't just assumed, it had to have been implanted in his head somehow. "You are very interesting species. We will not harm you, I promise this. But, you must come with me so we can speak to princess."

Ryan gave a sigh of defeat. Even if he did manage to escape, which his chances weren't very high to begin with, he had no idea what he would do to get by. And if these people truly are royalty, as they so claim, then what's to stop them from sending out a bunch of guards to hunt him down like a dog. "Fine, let's get this over with."

The woman smiled at him, but as he went to take a step the puddles forming from his soaked clothing managed to catch his foot, causing him to slip again and fall backwards. The back of his head made contact with the floor, landing pretty hard and causing an annoying ringing in his ears that wouldn't go away. "Brain, status report!"

Daddy, why can't I go to ballet class?

"Fuck!" He yelled to himself. Suddenly his body was lifted off of the ground and thrown over the guard woman's shoulder. Holy shit, she is strong. She had managed to pick him up and in one motion throw him over her shoulder and walk like he was no heavier than an iguana!

Ryan used every ounce of his will-power to stay awake. From a hit like that he could only assume he would have a concussion and sleep might just be all it takes to kill him. Despite this, he was carried into the kitchen and gently placed in a chair. Looking around he saw the three oddly colored women from earlier. Deciding he was going to take charge he spoke quickly and firmly. "Okay, y'all got five minutes to tell me what the hell is going on. I wanna know where I am, I wanna know how I got here, why I'm here, and I wanna know yesterday! So let's hear it."

The three princesses looked to each other and nodded before Celestia decided that she would be the one to speak on behalf of all of them. "Very well..."

Getting To Know You

Silence filled Luna's bed chambers as both she and the human sat across from each other. Each of them performing some sort of miniature action as to help make the moment feel less awkward. Ryan was sitting in a chair with one hand on his mouth as he leaned into his arm, his right leg bouncing up and down rapidly yet quietly. Luna sat on the edge of her bed, looking around her room as she played a game of Thumb War with herself.

Ryan lowered his hand from his face, placing it against his lap and raising his other hand to scratch at his head. Looking down he scanned his body. His other clothes were soaked and coated with mud so they were stripped away from him to be cleaned. Luckily for him the clothes in his bag were able to stay dry. Thank god for that waterproof spray shit. He now wore a pair of clean blue jeans, a plain black T-Shirt, a pair of black socks, and his leather gloves.

His eyes eventually wandered to Luna. She may be a different species and all, but hot damn! She was a fucking looker. Her body was thin with a decent muscle-tone, a perfect set of hips that rounded out that amazing flank of hers, and finally that small tank top holding in those monsters on her chest.

A plus on those Double D's sweetheart.

He also couldn't help but notice that they were about to spill out of that top of hers. Was this intentional? Was she willing wearing something like this? What exactly is the reasoning behind her wearing it? It seems like it would be uncomfortable...fuck it, boobs.

Luna soon let her eyes rest on Ryan, as something seemed to be distracting him. When she followed his gaze and noticed what he was looking at she blush lightly and asked in a somewhat reprimanding voice, "Does there appear to be something in here that is catching your attention?"

Shit! She spotted you. Quick, think of a lie!

Ryan's eyes quickly shot up to Luna's face and stayed there as he tried to think of an excuse as to why he was ogling her chest. "I really like your shirt. That crescent moon on it reminds me of something I made a while back."

Way to be.

Luna tilted her head in slight confusion. Did this human perhaps have some sort of attachment to the moon back in his world. "Something you made? What exactly is it that you created?"

"A crescent moon. It's not very good, but it's special to me." As Ryan spoke he reached into his shirt and grabbed onto the necklace he had tucked away, pulling it out for Luna to see. It was about the size of a fist, but it was a flat circle with a curved line going down the middle that gave it the appearance of a crescent moon.

In all of her years she could tell that it was some sort of metal that he made this from. She could also see that it had been powder coated, usually something like this is done to prevent rust. The powder coat made the moon necklace completely black and reflective. She wondered why he would make something like this. "Why would one make something like this? Is it for rituals, a sign of devotion, perhaps to a certain group?"

"I guess you could say that." He replied, "For me it's my devotion to the moon and everything that revolves around the night."

Now she was really curious. Did his people worship the night in his world? Was the moon praised like some sort of god-like figure? Or perhaps there were even people in his world that controlled the sun and the moon that had their own followers. "Would you mind elaborating on this? I'm very curious as to what it stands for specifically. Is there, perchance, some sort of hierarchy that the symbol rests upon?"

"Nope. It's just me and my moon."

"I don't understand..."

"To put it simply, princess. I made this because I love the night and I love the moon. There's no systems behind it, no armies of day and night or whatever. Not a lot of people where I come from appreciate the world around them. I don't really either, but ever since I was a kid I always felt like...I don't know. That I had some weird connection with the moon."

Luna could see that his features becoming that of nostalgia and attempted to question him further, but found herself being interrupted by Ryan. "Seems a little odd, don't you think?"

Again, Luna was slightly confused. One minute he was talking about his connection to the moon and now he was referring to something as odd. "What do you mean?"

"Think about it for a second. I've always felt I had a connection with the moon and now here I am talking to a woman-"

"A mare."

"Fuck you, who raises the moon and brings out the night in a completely different world. If you ask me, this isn't some sort of coincidence."

Bet money that she had something to do with you coming here.

Luna smiled nervously and started rubbing the back of her neck. "Well actually...you see...I'm kind of the reason you ended up here..."

Called it!

Ryan gave her a blank stare, when they told him he came here via portal earlier they failed to mention that there was a reason behind it. He assumed it was some kind of accident, but with that guilty yet satisfied look on Luna's face he could tell there was more to it than just that. "You got five seconds to explain this shit before I come over there and punch you in the tit."

Despite the fact that Luna was more than capable of bringing this guy down, and she knew it, she decided to humor him and give him an answer. It's the least he deserves. As embarrassing as it was to admit, she swallowed her pride and spoke. "I have been in need of a mate, however, none of the stallions here managed to capture my attention. That being said, my sister and I created a portal that would find somepony with a personality that resembles mine. It doesn't have too much to do with your rhythmic feelings towards the moon, it's mostly because I'm a certain way and you are the closest match."

So...eHarmony for bipedal talking horses?

Ryan stood up out of his chair and raised both hands in front of his face. "Stop! Wait! Hold the fuck on. You're telling me that I'm here because of some weird magical pony 'Perfect Match' bullshit? How the hell does that...We aren't even the same species! Hell, you and I are probably nothing alike. I mean, you got the bad girl look and that's hot and all, but I don't see you having the attitude for it."

Luna rose to her feet as well, almost as if she took his words as a personal insult. "Excuse me! Are you saying that you, a little human, have more of a rebellious streak than the two thousand year old princess of the night?"

Did this bitch just challenge us?

The night princess was maybe an inch or two taller than Ryan, but her stature wasn't going to be enough to scare him into submission. Not only that, but there was no way in hell she could outdo him. "Sweetheart, you can play your little games all you want, but I'm in the lead here."

"Oh please, I've fought in wars."

"Justifiable deaths, you did it to protect your land. I fought in gangs."

"Petty fights with little casualties. I leveled a whole nation."

"All's fair in money and politics. I temporarily brought down my own government for fun."

"Must have been a weak government. I can literally kill nightmares!"

"Dreams aren't real. I broke a cop's nose before jumping off of two hundred foot cliff!"

"I've sentenced stallions twice your size to death and watched them being beheaded!"

"Which was likely a royal decision because they committed a crime! That's not rebellious, that's justice. I've killed six men, three with my bare hands, one with a bat, and two with a car!"

"I blocked out the sun in an attempt to cover the world in darkness for all eternity!"

"...I don't really see the problem with that." Would that be a problem? He wondered, what with this world being full of magic and all that jazz they don't really need the sun to survive.

"Exact-Wait, what?" Luna asked in both shock and confusion.

Celestia let out a light yawn, signalling that it was almost time to call it a night. She pushed the paperwork she was going through aside and took a deep, relaxing breath. Before she goes to bed she should probably see how her sister and the human are fairing. She rose from her throne and stretched her limbs, popping a few of them as she did so before making her way to Luna's bedroom.

The walk wasn't a long one, but in Celestia's professional opinion, it could be shorter. Once she arrived she looked over at the unguarded door. The fact that the guards weren't watching over them made Celestia a bit uncomfortable, but Luna liked her privacy and refused to let the guards be near her room.

She couldn't really say anything about it, this was her wing of the castle, meaning that all of this area was the night princesses jurisdiction. With a firm step she walked over to the door and reached out to grab the nob. However, an odd assortment of sounds from the other side prompted her to stop and listen.

It sounded like there was some sort of struggle, which made Celestia assume the worst. Her heart racing and her protective instincts kicking in she burst through the door to find the one thing she feared come to life. Luna was being held to the ground with one of her arms being forced to bend at a painful looking angle.

Her eyes shot up to the one pinning Luna, the human she had left her alone with who back at her with an expression entirely filled with surprise and fear. As her anger grew, the temperature in the room started to rise.

Ryan looked up at the white mare from earlier, quickly taking notice of an angered expression enveloping her features. He could do nothing but what as he mane went up in flames and her horn started to glow. He also couldn't help but notice the whole room felt like it was moved a few hundred yards closer to the sun.

Not good. Not good! RUN!!!

He quickly let go of Luna's arm and dodged a beam of yellow light that shot out of the princesses horn before diving under the night princesses large bed. One might believe that taking refuge under a mattress would be both childish and cowardice. It would be, but this circumstance is different. It is actually a well known fact that alicorns are weak against mattresses and their divine powers. Making them incapable of-"Fuck!"

Luna watched as her sister marched over to her bed and lifted it off of the ground with one hand, making it lean toward the wall. Ryan screamed one of his weird human swear words that he told her about as he tried to crawl away from her sister. With the shock finally gone from her body, Luna went up to her sister and pulled her away from Ryan.

"Sister, stop this now!" The night princess yelled, "It wasn't what it looked like, you are misunderstanding the situation."

Celestia unwillingly turned to face Luna, the fire in her eyes and in her mane still shinning brightly as she was screamed at by her younger sibling. "How was that misunderstood? He was attacking you!"

"He was not attacking me!"

Ryan took this opportunity to slip out of the door and run like a bat out of hell to the nearest room he could hide out in. Making sure to avoid a repeat of the shower room situation, he read the signs posted above the doors, charging into the one labeled 'Janitor's Closet' and locking the door.

After about ten minutes of hiding he heard a knock at the door and quickly put on his best impression of a Mexican maid. "No body-I mean pony, is home! Please check back later."

They knocked again, this time more firmly. "Ryan, it's Celestia, please open the door."

She sounded calm enough, but Ryan wasn't gonna go for it. He liked taking risks and all, but this was one that would, more likely then not, get him killed. "I'm sorry Miss Celestia, I don't know anypony by that name."

Celestia wore a deadpan expression and slapped her hand against her head. "Ryan, I know that's you. Please open the door. I just wanna talk."

"You can go fuck yourself!" He yelled in his normal voice, seeing no reason to keep doing his shitty impression. Suddenly the knob became coated in a golden light. With a click of the lock the door swung open, revealing the sun princess on the other side standing straight and tall with her arms crossed.

Don't pee. Don't pee. Don't pee. Don't pee. Don't pee. Don't pee. Don't pee...Shit!

Ryan smiled nervously and started behaving as if they were friends who hadn't seen each other in years. "Oh! Hey Celestia! How's it going? I was just talking about you! Wow, I really love what you've done with your mane, it's so-fuck it, just kill me already."

Whelp, it was nice knowing ya. I guess I'll see you in Hell. Don't worry though, I'll save you a seat.

Celestia sighed. She was upset, but not with him. She was upset with herself. "Ryan, I'm sorry I tried to attack you. I still don't know you, and you two were in her room, and I heard all of that noise...I thought you were trying to hurt my sister."

"Well I may have been trying just a little, but I think she deserved-"

You better start rephrasing that right now or you're gonna be on a spit with an apple in your mouth while they roast you over her hair.

Ryan cleared his throat and continued, this time wording it differently. "Look, I would never hurt your sister. She and I were just talking and...who'd of known we both like to fight? Like...I'm really not sure how to-"

Celestia placed a finger to his lips to silence him. "Don't worry, I completely understand. Luna already told me everything."

He breathed a sigh of relief and waited for Celestia to move her hand before continuing. "I guess I can't blame you for acting the way you did. You saw me putting your sister in an arm bar for fuck sake. Hell, when I found out my sister's boyfriend had hit her I broke both of his legs."

"While I don't completely agree with your actions, I do think that he shouldn't have put his hands on your sister." Celestia commented.

"Don't agree wi-You tried to turn me into a god damn shish kebab!"

The sun princess smiled and nodded to him before turning to face the night wing. "Come along now, it's getting late. I'll lead you to your room."

Ryan shrugged and followed close behind her. Today has been interesting; first he was running from police, he jumped off a cliff, got pulled through the eHarmony portal, woke up being straddled by aliens, was told he was supposed to be mated with the princess of the night, and then he was almost killed by her sister. "Wow, today has been fucking nuts."

Celestia giggled at the human. He was a really fascinating creature and all, but despite the physical differences, he was a lot like a normal stallion. Everything she had heard from Luna was enough to tell her that. "So, I hear you've grown quite fond of my sister's chest region."

"...uhh"

Run, bitch! Run!

Ryan was about to take off for the third time today, but Celestia grabbed onto his shirt, rendering any attempts of escape null and void. "Do not worry, it's not a bad thing. You are supposed to be her perfect mate after all, your attraction to her is an important part of this development."

When Celestia was sure he wasn't going to run, she released her grip on Ryan who continued to follow her. "Development? What development? What are you getting at?"

"Why, your relationship with Luna, of course." She said with a smile. Now that he knew why he was brought here, she could commence the teasing of both him and her sister. Especially if they actually started growing close to each other.

"Woah...Woah! Hold on a second! Our relationship? Okay, I get the portal says I'm her perfect match or whatever, but that doesn't mean I'm just gonna marry her right off of the bat. Besides, marriage is evil; and, statistics show that it is the leading cause of divorce."

"I guess I'll just have to wait for you two to be walking down the isle so I can say I told you so. I can already imagine the foals you would have." She said with a laugh, causing Ryan to grumble.

Okay, alright. If this bitch wants to play that way, he can play it better. "If Luna and I have kids, I'll make sure to remind you every day of your life that I fucked your sister."

It didn't take Luna too long to fix up her room. She could understand why Celestia acted the way she did and didn't blame her for it in the slightest. It was extremely unappreciated though, so she would likely prank her later for this. Once she was done she prepared herself for night court and exited her room.

She wondered if Celestia had apologized to Ryan yet, more importantly, if he was accepting that apology. Before she could even take three steps forward she saw a familiar silhouette flying down the hallway. Once it got close enough she lowered herself to the ground, allowing it to fly over her head and slam into the wall behind her.

Holy shit! You're gonna feel that tomorrow.

Ryan's body twitched a few times, the force of the impact having knocked him out. The abuse he had suffered today was almost as bad as when he woke up in Tijuana, Mexico with no pants nor recollection of who he was. Oh well, it's just another adventure in Ryan's wonderful, fucked up life.

Our First Date

Shortly after Ryan was released from the infirmary, only seeming to have suffered a light concussion and a few cracked ribs, he attempted to make his way back to his room. His brain was a bit fuzzy from both the impact several hours ago and the pain killers they gave him just before leaving. As he stumbled through the hallways he silently asked himself where his room was. Now that he thought about it, he didn't get the chance to actually even see it.

His search, though in vain, did prove to be somewhat useful. He managed to memorize the entire night wing of the castle, kind of. He might still get lost every now and again, but he knew the basic layout. As he continued to move about the hallway, swaying every so often, he eventually caught the attention of a very familiar white alicorn.

Celestia, upon spotting the stumbling human, flew over to his side. Ryan was going to have a busy morning ahead of him and he didn't even know it yet. "Hello, Ryan."

The second the sound of that familiar voice reached his ears Ryan spun around with a new-found adrenaline rush pumping through his body. Once he was turned to face her he raised his fists up toward his head in a defensive manner. He was ready for a fight this time and it didn't look like he was going to go down so easily now.

Celestia gave him a light-heart giggle. She knew she could beat him easily without even so much as flicking her wrist. However, this wasn't the most positive of signs. The creature they pulled from another world felt threatened by her presence. For all she knew he could start some sort of war if he decided to go home. "Please, Ryan. Calm down, I'm not going to hurt you."

"Like hell you aren't." Ryan began. He had been here for the maximum of one day and he already had lost any ounce of trust that may have been present to this god-like creature. "Come near me and I'll punch you square in the fucking throat!"

Celestia gave him a very unpleasant look before levitating him into the air and dangling him in front of her. "Look, I know things between us started off on the wrong hoof, but you need to snap out of it. This isn't for me, this is for my sister."

Now he was just confused, what was so important about him anyway? Why would someone like him be considered the perfect match for a night goddess. "What are you getting at? Why is this so important?"

"Because my sister means the world to me and I will do anything to make her happy." Ryan could see the determination in her eyes. In less than a second her motherly gaze turned to that of a predator stalking its next meal.

I would like to be a turtle...

Despite the unsettling look she was giving him, he could admire her dedication to making her family happy. He lived that life at one point, back when he still had a family. All they need do is ask and he would obey, all to just make them a little bit happier. As he floated in the air, eye level with Celestia, he crossed his arms and sighed. "What do I have to do?"

Ryan held his breath as to remain completely still for the suit tailor until they were done taking notes on his measurements. He took a deep breath once the tailor was finished and watched him walk off to a back room before turning his attention to Celestia, who was only sitting a few feet from him reading a magazine. "So you set up an actual date for us?"

Celestia turned one of the pages she was looking at before glancing up at Ryan, giving him a light smile. "Yes, I did. I thought it would be nice for you two to get out for a bit. Especially Luna."

"Don't you think you're kind of rushing this?" He asked, thinking about how quickly all of this was happening. "I mean, we've known each other for a day. Isn't it a bit early for us to start dating?"

"You're not dating, you're going on a date. That is completely different. Besides, if you two go out together you can get to know each other better."

She did have a point, but it just felt so weird the way that all of this was happening. Seriously, he fell out of a portal, ran for a bit, talked to Luna, and was almost murdered. These were not the signs for a properly developing relationship. These were more like; If you fuck up, you're gonna die!

He was beyond nervous about all of this. Going out on a date with a woman he didn't know, who wasn't even the same species as him, going out in public in a world that he did not know or understand, and overall if something went wrong then Celestia was going to blame him and probably ride his body down a hill like some sort of meat toboggan. "Are you alright, Ryan?"

Ryan shook his head and blinked a few times, Celestia's voice being enough to shake him from his disturbed thoughts and daydreams of his body being brutalized by her. "Yeah, I'm fine. Just zoned out for a second."

Celestia wasn't sure how to handle his odd behavior, but decided it would probably be easier to shrug it off for now. No point in messing with him too much now. She already got him put in the hospital once.

My friend, you are royally fucked. Good luck and may the great warhorse in the sky be with you on this arduous quest.

The sun goddess rose from her seat and set down the magazine she was reading. "I'd love to stay and chat, but I need to make sure Luna is ready." She said, leaving the room and going elsewhere.

Ryan watched her as she left, his eyes scanning her figure as she took her leave. From her slender torso down to her big round flank. He couldn't help but notice how it moved with every swayed step she took. His attention was soon caught by the stallion who had previously taken his measurements. "Sir, your attire is ready when you are."

Luna exited the changing room, showing her sister the dress she had chosen; A Moonlight Serenade Navy Blue Strapless Maxi Dress. It was navy blue with padded cups, making her already well endowed chest appear to be slightly larger. The skirt had a side slit, allowing it to reveal one of her slender, but well-toned legs from her foot to the middle of her thigh. The center of the dress had a replica of her cutie mark, the crescent moon.

The night princess smiled nervously at her sister, pulling her mane back and tying it into a ponytail. "So...How do I look?"

Celestia almost started drooling on herself the second Luna walked out. Once her full form entered the day princesses vision she became lost in her own little world. "My goodness..."

Luna's features became one of panic. "What is it? Is something wrong. Is the dress not pretty? Oh, I knew I should have just went out wearing my casual attire."

Celestia walked over to Luna and wrapped her in a loving embrace "No, sister. You look absolutely wonderful."

Luna smiled inward and hugged her sister back. It was kind of an odd feeling at first; Since she took on this whole rebellious personality she had never actually just gone up to embrace her sister. "Thank you, Tia."

"Now, let's just hope your date can look as good as you."

"Celestia!" A voice called out from behind the door before opening it. "Where are we even going? You never told me-" Ryan's voice trailed off as he looked over at Luna. He could feel his heart racing at the sight of her. "Holy hell..."

Fuck whatever species gap we'll end up having to jump, I want it.

Ryan became locked in the same mesmeric -like state Celestia had previously been in. Luna was having a small trip of her own as well. The human was pretty handsome to begin with, but seeing him dress up made the appeal that much stronger. He was donned in black dress pants and a black vest over a blue dress shirt with its sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He had been given a tie, but had tossed it aside, leaving him room to have his crescent moon necklace rest on his chest and to have the first two buttons undone and open to give off some exposure of his chest.

Celestia had to admit that she was a bit surprised at how well he was wearing that suit. She even started to wonder if maybe she should go after Ryan. She couldn't do that to Luna though, she deserved this, she needed this. "Well, now that you two seem to be ready, how about we get you moving. You're reservations at The Canterlot Restaurant'e is in fifteen minutes."

The trip itself was rather quick since they were being royally escorted. They were able to take any and all shortcuts and skip over anypony that might get in their way. Seems like more of an abuse of power in their title, but the pony-people didn't really seem to mind, so fuck it.

They arrived five minutes early and were given a two-person table promptly upon arrival. Wouldn't want to upset royalty now, would we? Ryan, being the gentleman he is, made sure to pull out the chair for Luna and push it in when she planted her rump on the padded wood. She thanked him and with that he took a seat just across from her.

The two sat in both relative and awkward silence, looking all around the room they were in and occasionally glancing at each other. Ryan's eyes couldn't help but almost become glued to her every time he looked her way. The way that dress gripped her from the waist up, showing off her wonderful form. How her breasts were being pressed together and showing off a mountain of cleavage between the cups of the garment.

Luna was in no better a position. Ryan was definitely no stallion, but he pulled off the suit very well. Part of her was a bit too excited by the fact that he rolled up his sleeves, revealing some of his body as well as tightening the cloth around his arms to show off his soft built biceps.

They stayed like this for several minutes, being silent and occasionally ogling the others features. Ryan figured that this had been going on too long now. He was the man and it was his job to make sure that this date went well, lest he would rather have Celestia cut his head off...then decapitate him.

However, just because he had to make sure the date went well, that didn't mean he couldn't have a little fun. A bit of teasing never hurt anyone-er-pony. Forcing the most sultry voice he could, he leaned back and undid one of the buttons on his shirt. "So, am I everything you could possibly imagine?"

Luna blushed slightly; was he really doing this in a public place? Is he being serious? She watched as his features went from sexual to comical. He was doing this specifically to get a reaction out of her. Alright, if he wanted to play this game then she could play it right back. She placed one of her hands on the back of her neck, pretending to be nervous. "Well, I'm liking what I see so far. How about you?"

He watched as her hand suddenly slid down from her neck to her chest, grabbing the neck of her dress and pulling it down. Showing off more of her wonderful cleavage and shifting her shoulders to press her breasts further against each other.

I think our heart just skipped a beat...or twelve.

Luna giggled as he seized up, his eyes staring intently at her well endowed chest. She re-positioned her shoulders and released her dress, letting everything fall back into its normal place. "I think that'll suffice for an answer."

Okay, she's a bit more ballsy than expected. Not as bad as some of his ex's though. If he tried pulling a stunt like that with them he usually ended up being tackled to the floor and basically being raped. Not that he was complaining, it was fun every time.

Most of your ex's were nymphomaniacs.

Yep, one of his favorite qualities. However, she was willing to match his game so he would need to find some way to stump her. The restaurant scene was a bit annoying though. Ponies kept looking over and staring at him. "Hey, how about we bounce from this shit-hole and do something fun?"

She raised a brow at Ryan, wondering just what he was planning. Was he expecting to bed her already just because of a bit of teasing? While she has been sexually deprived, she wasn't about to jump on the first creature throwing up an offer. "And what, pray tell, do you have in mind."

"Anything that doesn't involve sitting on my ass all day..."

She was still weary of his intentions, but if he tried anything she could stop him. It wouldn't hurt just to go out and see what he had in mind. "Very well."

Luna was completely lost as to why Ryan had her fly them onto the roof of one of the many buildings in Canterlot. There was nothing up here that they could really do unless he was planning something she wouldn't approve of. She kept her eyes locked on him as he looked around at the rooftops before unbuttoning the vest and sliding it off; placing it down on the structure beneath his feet.

Before she could ask what he was doing, Ryan took off. Running at a full sprint to the edge of the building and leaping with a determined grunt escaping his throat. She gasped in shock and ran over to him, but it was too late.

Loosen the legs, tighten the chest, prepare for landing.

Ryan landed on a slightly smaller building's roof; waiting for his feet to hit solid ground before letting his body fall and roll to lessen the impact. He was breathing heavily once he had forced his body back to a standing position.

Luna stared in shock and awe at the human. She didn't know whether she should be happy that he wasn't hurt, or angry that he did something so stupid.

"You coming or what?" Ryan yelled up to her, pulling the alicorn out of her thoughts.

"Excuse me?"

"Come on, little miss bad girl. What, am I too much for you to keep up with?"

Oh, now it's on. Luna's horn flared, her dress quickly vanishing in the blink of an eye and being replaced with her normal attire. Unlike the poor little human, she had an advantage. The night princess spread her wings and climbed onto the edge, looking down at Ryan, who was giving her a cocky smile.

Seeing that she was finally ready to have some real fun, he started running again. The next building was a bit taller than this one; he would need to do this carefully or he'd likely end up being a puddle on the ground. Once he was at the edge he focused his muscles on going for height, rather than distance.

With that programmed into his legs he managed to almost get to where he needed to grab the ledge, but fell short by a few inches. Reacting as quickly as his body would allow, he pressed one of his feet to the building and pushed up, propelling him high enough to grab onto his target and pull himself up.

Luna had to admit, she was impressed. Not a lot of ponies could pull something like this off. Most were either too scared while others didn't have the leg muscles nor stamina to move like that. But Ryan, he seemed to be doing this as if it were second nature. If he could do things like this with little effort, she wondered what other feats he could accomplish.

Ignoring those thoughts for now, Luna leaped off of the first building and took flight; quickly catching up to the sprinting human who merely looked over at her and smiled while continuing to work his way across the rooftops.

This went on for nearly an hour and at one point Luna decided to give her wings a break and join him. He was surprised at how well she was keeping up with him. She was a natural born climber.

Maybe they didn't evolve from horses. They could be a genetic mutation of a unicorn hate-fucking a monkey, who proceeded to rape an eagle.

That was probably the stupidest thought to ever cross his mind.

Fuck you!

Both parties eventually started to run out of steam. So after one final jump to a new building they crashed to the ground, painfully sliding across the hard roof top. The impact from the crash was nothing compared to the burning sensation in their muscles and lungs, but it was more than enough to keep them grounded.

Ryan had landed on his side and rolled onto his front, causing his left arm and some of his face to get cut up in the process. The clothing had protected some of him, kind of. But at this point, a lot of it had been either dirtied or ripped to shreds from the less-than-formal physical activity.

Luna was in no better position. She attempted to use her wings to lessen the blow, but it was in vain. Her body was face down on the roof and covered with cuts, scratches, and what could only be explained as road rash. Luckily for the alicorn, her healing magic kicked in, making all of her wounds vanish in a matter of seconds.

The human was not so lucky in the healing game, but his endurance was more than enough to help him make it through this. He looked over at Luna and she back at him, the two both panting heavily. After a few seconds of uninterrupted eye contact they started laughing; the lack of air in their lungs making it sound more like they were dry heaving.

Ryan forced himself to a his feet and held his right hand out to Luna. She happily took it and pulled herself up with the help of her, quote unquote, mate. He continued to hold her hand and lead her to the edge of this building before releasing her, but rather than jumping he merely sat down and looked over the city.

Luna smiled and joined him. This was a nice change of pace from her usual routine. By this time of night she was usually sitting in Night court, bored out of her mind and listening to the night owl nobles complaining about the stupidest things. But tonight she got to go out, run around like a filly, and overall just have fun. "Today has been fun. Thank you, Ryan."

"No problem." He replied, still a bit breathlessly. He took in a few deep breaths, but quickly felt a pair of eyes glued to him. Looking over he could see Luna staring intently to his left side.

"Ryan, you're hurt." She commented, finally taking notice of the damage on his left arm. The blue shirt he was wearing was becoming stained a deep shade of purple.

Sir, we are losing a lot of blood...

The human looked down and inspected his arm, noticing a rather large puddle of blood forming beside him. Looking back to where he had landed, he could see a trail of red liquid from where he had made his way to where he was sitting.

Adrenaline finally wearing off as the realization dawned on him, Ryan started to become very light headed. "Shit." Before he could so much as blink his body collapsed into Luna and everything faded to black.

Man down!

...

You know, I think the universe just hates you.

Ryan woke up several hours later in what he could immediately recognize as a hospital. White walls, shit bed, some weird guy twitching in the bed beside him. Yep, this was definitely a hospital. The window to his left showed the sun shining brightly, hinting to him that he had been there for a while now.

He was about to get up but soon found himself entrapped in a rather tight embrace from an unknown source. His usual instincts would have been to scream Rape while proceeding to beat the ever-loving hell out of whoever was near him, but for some reason he felt calm. Like he knew that, whoever this was, they weren't going to hurt him.

"Oh my gosh, Ryan! I'm so glad that you're okay." Came a familiar voice from the one hugging him.

"Hey Luna," He began, speaking in the most nonchalant voice he could muster. "How's it hanging?"

Luna released him from her grip and positioned herself so she was directly in his line of sight, speaking with a tone that Ryan could only recognize as concern. "How are you feeling?"

"Well, my left arm is completely numb." He said, looking down at his arm. It had been expertly wrapped but was coated in red stains. He must have really messed it up.

Suddenly Celestia entered the room via teleportation, causing both Luna and Ryan to jump. Unknown to Ryan, Luna had been doing her best to keep this information away from her sister. But there she stood, arms crossed and with a stern look on her face. "So, which one of you would like to explain to me why our guest had to be taken to the infirmary for the second time in the past two days?"

You were the reason for the first one!

Luna was doing her best to formulate a lie that may be just believable enough to get her sister off their backs. Little did she know that Ryan had something that he thought would be a bit more enjoyable in mind. "Well you see, I am actually a chronic masturbater and somehow, someway, I managed to pick up so much speed that every artery in my forearm just popped."

To be honest, he wasn't Celestia's biggest fan. Yeah, she could be funny, but he had almost been killed by her because of a simple misunderstanding. The longer he was here, the more he was likely going to keep shoving bullshit into her face.

Correction! This is probably one of the stupidest ideas you have ever had.

Celestia, though not happy with the situation he was in, was glad that he was well enough to still have a sense of humor. He must not be in too bad of shape if his mouth is still running. "Next time, you should probably ask for help then. I believe Luna may be able to offer some assistance."

That shit eating grin on Celestia's face was great, but the embarrassed look on Luna's was priceless. The blood forcing its way through her cheeks was literally turning her face purple.

Just as Luna was about to retort, Celestia vanished in the blink of an eye. This caused Luna's ears to drop and her face to take an annoyed expression as she growled to herself.

"Grow some balls girl, she was just kidding. Even I can see that." Luna had a sense of humor, but for some reason, whenever it came to her sister, she always seemed to be effected by it in a weird way. Almost like it was some sort of competition and she was losing.

"I know she was joking, that's the point." She said, still sounding a bit pissed.

"What do you mean-Oh...oh..."

Sibling wars...Please god, don't let this place turn into the next Nut Shot Kingdom.

Ryan shuddered at the memories of his past where he and his siblings would find bigger and better ways to cause each other testicular pain. The only good thing to come out of that was a massive amount of pain tolerance when it came to sack taps, and nut punches.

"Those were the days," He muttered to himself, "the horrible, ball popping days..."

Luna's focus went completely onto Ryan, having heard his silent conversation with himself, but not completely understanding what he was referring to. "I take it you have siblings as well?"

"Yep."

This made her a bit more curious about him and his upbringing. "What are they like?"

"They were all assholes."

"That's not very nice to say about your family."

"Correction, they were my relatives. They were not my family." He explained. Ryan had a very interesting view on those who were close to him and an even more interesting definition of the word family.

Luna wanted to question him further, but now didn't seem like the best time. Instead she grabbed a nearby chair and slid it beside his bed, allowing her to take a seat beside him. "How's your arm feeling? Any better?"

"It feels kind of like a wet noodle." Ryan waved his arm around, loosening his wrist and letting his hand flop around freely

The night princess couldn't help but giggle at his comment, but still couldn't help but feel concerned for his well-being. "You should get some rest."

"Without a goodnight kiss? How rude!" He teased, making Luna put on a cocky smile.

"Oh please; like you would be brave enough to place your lips upon those of royalty." Ryan was a brave character, this much she could see, but there was no doubt in her mind about this. He doesn't have the guts to make that kind of move.

Um...Excuse you, bitch!

Did she just fucking challenge him...again!? Nope, no way. This is not allowed! By now, most people who had met him learned not to challenge him. His stubborn streak would not allow him to back down.

With this part of his mind set in motion, he reached up and grabbed the neck of her top with his good hand and pulled; The force being more than enough to pull Luna out of her seat and onto the bed.

As their faces rested just centimeters from each other, Ryan decided to do something that sickened him to his very core. He was going to give her a chance to take it back. "You wanna run that by me again, sweetheart?"

Luna was surprised by his actions at first, but her mind eventually settled on the assumption that this was merely for looks. He wasn't going to do it, he just wanted to make her think that he would. All she would have to do is call him on his bluff. So, with the shit eating grin now spread across her face, she did just that. "You heard me. You don't have what it takes to-"

Her words became caught in her throat as her lips were forced against Ryan's. Her eyes became wide and for the second time in the past twenty-four hours she was struck with a mixture of both shock and awe.

Ryan kept his eyes glued to hers, sending a message that he was more than willing to do whatever she called him out on. And, from the look she was giving him, he could tell that the message has been sent, read, and eaten straight into her brain. Once again, he had won.

Beneath The Surface

The area is dark, empty, hollow; it's as if nothing had ever existed there, nor ever would. Luna couldn't understand what she was doing wrong, this was something she had done time and time again with no error; so why wasn't it working now. She wandered through the empty dream field, hoping to find something, anything. Lo and behold though, she was met with more darkness. The night princess let out an annoyed sigh and pulled herself out of her dream stride.

Once she was back in the real world she eyed the interior of her bedroom shortly before placing her head in her hands, rubbing her temples with her finger tips. This was ridiculous. She wanted to know what it was that made Ryan her perfect mate; what is it that made them so similar?

They both got along fairly well, they had some of the same interests, and the two loved to wrestle about and play games together. There was never a point where they were put in some sort of awkward positioning or uncomfortable situation. She wasn't complaining that things were working out, she just wanted to know why.

Her answers would soon come from a very unnerving source, one she could sense immediately upon its entry to her private chambers. She growled slightly to herself, looking towards a rather dark corner in her room. "I know you are here, Discord. Reveal yourself."

Discord grumbled to himself before stepping out of the shadows. He was a rather tall man with grey skin. His eyes were yellow with red pupils, his hair, as well as a well-trim goatee, were silver in color. He wore an old brown suit that fitted his lengthy form perfectly, he had two large but completely unmatched horns. Finally, on his back were two wings; One was feathered, while the other was extremely bat-like. "I really hate that you and your sister can sense my presence, it takes all the fun out of being nosy."

"I'm sure it does." She said with a scowl. This wan't anything new for him, he was constantly listening in and trying to stay on top of whatever was going on. Whether this was just out of curiosity, or for a more insidious agenda, was completely unknown to all others but him.

"Oh, come on, Lulu," Discord suddenly appeared beside her, levitating several inches off of the ground. "Don't be that way. I thought that we were friends. Do you not want to be friends?"

She could tell by his tone and that shit-eating smirk on his face that he was saying all of this in mock sadness. The night princess just wanted him to stop with his games and be more direct for once. His games were fun to him, but a living hell to anything else.

"I even brought you a present from the Badlands." With a snap of his fingers a small jar full or red sand appeared in his hand. He examined the jar with a smile before holding it out to Luna. "Here you are."

Luna grabbed the jar and went over it. There was nothing out of place about it, no special magical properties, there wasn't even an engraving on the jar. It was, in all of its glory, just a hunk of glass full of sand. Nothing more, nothing less. "What's your angle, Discord?"

Discord eyed Luna in mock surprise. "Me? Have an angle?"

Luna stared at the chaos bringing abomination with a stern look plastered across her face.

"You're telling me that, I, your good friend, Discord; Cannot simply give you a gift out of the kindness of my heart?" he asked with a multitude of dramatic poses to emphasize his 'pain'.

She raised a brow at him, causing the god to grumble before swiping the jar from Luna's hand with a playfully angered expression on his face.

"Fine, be that way." He said, letting himself lower to the ground. "I'll just give it to Ryan. He loves the desert, so maybe he will appreciate it more." With that being said, Discord walked toward the door, secretly grinning to himself.

Luna was about to shrug his words off, but then it hit her. Discord had been in the Badlands for several weeks now, how did he know that Ryan liked deserts, let alone that he even existed. How did this monster know something about the human that Luna didn't? "Wait!" She called out, causing the god to stop in his tracks.

Discord turned around, still smiling. His little plan was starting to come together. "Yes, oh great Princess of the Night? How may I serve you?" He asked with a kneel.

She rolled her eyes at Discord's behavior and waited for him to go back to his normal posture before continuing. "How do you know about Ryan?"

"Well, Princess. I live here too you know, and it would be rude for me to not know every single guest that enters the castle and greet them properly, would it not?"

Luna could tell that he was planning something, this is how it always starts, but he wouldn't allow her to jump right into the thick of things. She would have to play his little game and ease into it. "So you have spoken with him?"

He nodded and took a seat in a chair that seemed to appear out of nowhere. "I most certainly did. You see, when I came back I felt an unfamiliar presence wandering the halls and just so happened to bump into him. We talked over a few cups of coffee before he decided to retire for the night."

Ryan and Discord sat down together, talked, drank coffee, and no fights broke out? Nopony ran away screaming? No great disaster was about to take place? What is this world coming to??? "I take it the two of you got along rather well."

"Most definitely." Suddenly a pillow that had been sized and stitched to look like Ryan appeared in Discord's arms. As it did, he gave it a powerful hug. "We're practically best friends now. Who knows, maybe one day he'll even let me into his family."

The pillow was creepy, plain and simple. Why would he create something like that? Was this just to mess with her, or was it simply due to his weird personality.

"Even better than that." He continued, throwing the pillow onto Luna's bed, "He does not fear me, or my powers. In fact, he adores them. Even let me test a few spells on him. Oh, it was so much fun!"

Luna really hoped that whatever bond Ryan was forming with Discord would not go much further than what it is now. She would really rather he didn't end up getting caught up in one of the chaos god's schemes, thus getting him into trouble and likely banished.

"It was rather upsetting that he had to go to bed, but I knew a way around that." He made sure to keep his eyes on Luna when he spoke the last part, wanting to see her reaction.

"Excuse me?" What did he mean by 'I knew a way around that'? What was he planning, better yet, what was he doing?

"Well, since he and I became such good friends in a short time, I didn't think he would mind too much if I, you know...Went inside of his mind." Discord knew she was having trouble getting into Ryan's subconscious mind. He was rather surprised at the difficulty it posed to him as well. Not many have mental barriers that strong.

Luna stood in place, completely awestruck that Discord had actually managed to get into Ryan's mind. This had to be some sort of trick, there was no way in Tartarus that he actually managed to do it. "You're bluffing." She said with crossed arms. "I couldn't even get into his mind, so there is no way you could."

"Well, I'll admit it was difficult at first, but then I learned the secret." This time he wasn't lying. There was a way into the human's mind, but it required something very different than just simply tearing down walls

"Very well; if you think you have it figured out, then prove it. Show me." Luna demanded, only for her words to be met by one of Discord's hands reaching out to her.

She was hesitant at first, but took Discord's hand, being careful not to be cut by his jagged fingernails. Once her hand met his they were in the same dark area that she had been in during her first attempt to get into Ryan's mind. "Okay, we're here. Now what?"

Discord made several clicking sounds with his mouth while nodding. "Oh sweet, naive, stupid Luna. Do you really expect me to give you all of the answers. That would be boring. I am here to aid you, not guide you." He looked down to the jar of sand still in one of his hands and tossed it to her. "Here, take this. Consider it a re-gift."

She watched as he crossed his arms while the two floated in the empty space, holding the jar in her hands. The night princess just wasn't sure what to do, and why he was so insistent on her having a jar full of sand he found in a desert...Wait a minute.

"Fine, be that way." He said, letting himself lower to the ground. "I'll just give it to Ryan. He loves the desert, so maybe he will appreciate it more."

Luna stared down at the jar before opening the lid. The sand within started to stir from an unknown force and soon started spinning around, forming into a large spiral. Before long, the jar exploded and the entire space became full of rapid winds that blew copious amounts of sand every which direction.

Luna had to cover her face to keep the annoying little particles from entering her eyes, but suddenly the wind died down, she could no longer feel sand hitting her body; more importantly, she could feel solid ground beneath her hooves. She opened her eyes and uncovered her face to find herself standing on top a large rocky mountain in the middle of a desert.

Her eyes scanned the whole area, taking in every detail. But it was dark, luckily there was a full moon above her head, giving her just enough light to see everything in her general area. "What happened?"

Discord appeared by her side, levitating at an angle that allowed him to be in a laying down position. "It seems our friend here has a very adaptive mind. It keeps itself as a blank canvas, finds something to latch on to, then adjusts itself accordingly. Example; I know he is not a fan of parties, but get him in one and after a few minutes he'll be a party animal."

"How do you know all of this about him?" She found it weird that Discord had only just met Ryan, but already knew so much about him. They shouldn't have had the time to talk about so many different subjects and just browsing his mind wouldn't give out detailed information.

"When I came here, I knew just being here would limit my knowledge, so I pushed the boundaries a bit and found where his memories were stored."

"You went through his memories?" This slightly irked Luna. Not only was it rude to just barge into somepony else's memories, it was a complete abuse of power.

"Only the ones that were open. Memories are like doors, some of them are practically open, while others are locked. For some reason, a majority of his are locked, sealed, chained, and then welded shut."

Luna was starting to look beyond the point of just crossing boundaries now. If somepony was trying this hard to block out memories, then something horrible must have happened to them. That, or he's hiding something. "I see. Can you take me to where his memories are stored?"

"Sadly, I cannot. This place is simply too hectic for even I to navigate through it." It was true, with the quickly adapting landscape around them, Ryan's mind would soon find a way to seal them out completely. "But, I might know someone who can help us."

Discord pointed to a set of mountains in the distance. Luna had to squint her eyes to see what he was trying to show her. Her eyes adjusted and she saw a bipedal figure sprinting across the top of the mountains and expertly leaping from boulder to boulder as they entered its range. The figure suddenly stopped moving and Luna became overpowered by this nagging feeling that something was watching her.

In the blink of an eye both Discord and Luna were standing directly in front of the figure. It was nearly eye-level with Luna, just staring at her. She quickly started to make out its features; Black shoes, dark blue jeans, black shirt, Ryan's face-Wait a minute...

The figure rose its arms and suddenly the moon burst into flames, immediately bringing light to the dark land. Luna had to rub her eyes as they were assaulted by the sudden brightness, but at least now she would be able to see properly. She opened her eyes and looked back at the figure. It was Ryan!

"So are you gonna hug me or am I just gonna keep standing here with my thumb up my ass."

Discord teleported over to Ryan wearing a pair of sunglasses and swimming suit. He threw an arm around the human as if they had known each other for years.

Luna was about to happily oblige, but stopped herself. This wasn't Ryan. It looked like him, but it didn't completely sound like him. The vocal patters seemed to echo a lot, telling her that this was some weird thought in his head. "You're not Ryan, are you?"

Discord and Ryan frowned. Discord, because he was hoping it would take her much longer to figure everything out. Ryan, because she was kind of right. He wasn't Ryan, not completely. "Yes and no." Ryan simply said. "I'm Ryan's thought process, the impulses he gives in to, the little voice in his head that'll tell him what he should and should not do. So; No, I'm not Ryan. I'm kind of just the guy who gives him advice and feedback."

"Ryan has a very independent mind-set." Discord said, stretching one arm over to her and pulling her closer to the group. "Which usually means that he should have a one-track mind. However, certain things have transpired in his life which made him more open. It created our little friend here."

Ryan waved at Luna with a childish smile on his face. "So, onto the matter at hand. Something told me I was needed and I answered. What do you fuckers need?"

Discord nudged Luna, it was her idea after all. She cleared her throat before speaking. "I wish to see how Ryan is handling his memories."

Ryan seemed a bit uncomfortable with this. She could tell because of how his happy expression faltered slightly. His left eye even twitched slightly. "I'm sorry sweetheart, but if you want to go there, you better have a damn good reason."

Why was he being so defensive? Was this part of Ryan's brain the reason he was hiding things? "I wish to know why the portal chose him as my perfect match. It can't just simply be because we get along, the portal goes into your very soul and searches for someone thats soul resembles theirs. So it has to be more th-"

"Than just a simple liking. I know; I know what it is, I know why it happened, and I know the source personally. Can't say I like it though." Ryan had heard the guards talking about Luna behind her back, whispers of who she might truly be beneath the surface.

"Look," Ryan continued, now wearing a stern look on his face. "I know you're gonna be persistent and I know that the longer I make you wait, the worse your curiosity will get and that'll just make my job harder. So how about we cut straight through the bullshit?"

Discord and Luna glanced at each other. Discord was still wearing a grin on his face. She could swear that he knew more than he was letting on. She gave him a suspicious glare before answering for both of them. "Agreed"

She turned to face Ryan, but when she did the environment around them was completely different. They were in a very old fashioned looking, candle lit hallway that seemed to go on for miles with doors after doors, after doors going down both sides. Most of these doors were boarded over and even had chains going across them, complete with a padlock in the center.

She stared in awe at the hallway, wondering what would be behind each door. Her question was soon answered by Ryan. "Welcome to the hall of memories."

Ryan turned and looked down the hallway. The group was suddenly levitating just above the carpeted floor and started flying at what seemed to be a million miles a second. "Each door holds a memory of a different time, a different event, each and every thought and action he has ever had; Everything is in this hallway.

Discord couldn't seem less amused, he had already been through here and found little to address, but he was curious as to what was behind the doors as was Luna. "Why are so many of these doors blocked off?" The night princess inquired.

Ryan looked back at the princess, still looking very uncomfortable. "To protect him and everyone he's around."

"What do you mean?" As she asked this the group came to a grinding halt.

"I mean what I fucking said!" Ryan yelled, suddenly being filled with anger. "Damn near every door here has something fucked up in it, something that should have fucked him up. So I sit here and work my fucking ass off to make sure that he doesn't have to remember the shit!"

Luna had taken a step back when Ryan started yelling. If he was reacting like this then maybe she should just forget about going through his memories. If they were enough to make his mind react like this just by being asked a simple question, then perhaps she doesn't want to see them.

Ryan closed his eyes and took a breath, letting himself calm down. "I'm sorry for my little bipolar outburst. It's just-I work so hard to make sure that he doesn't turn into that fucking thing again and its...It's a lot on me."

Discord levitated over to Ryan, now dressed in his normal attire, and patted his shoulder. "There, there, child. We are here for you if you need us." He said, doing his best to keep playing the 'good friend' card with Ryan.

The god held out a hand in front of Ryan and a glass of carbonated brown liquid appeared. Ryan happily took the glass and sipped from it, letting the rest of his nerves settle.

Luna carefully approached Ryan and slowly pulled him into a loving embrace. She understood how hard it was to battle your own mind and fight to forget all of the bad you had done.

Ryan was surprised at first, but was more than happy to wrap his arms around her and hold her close. It's not often that he receives actual hugs. He could usually only do things like this by reliving the actual Ryan's memories. But this, this was much more enjoyable.

A strange sensation came over Luna as they held each other. It was like she had just walked the home of someone who she knew accepted her. She felt welcomed to be here.

The group started flying rapidly once again and soon came to the end of the hallway where there was a single iron door with locks of all kinds holding it shut. They landed softly and Ryan approached the door, placing one of his hands against it. The locks suddenly clicked open, metal bars were pulled out of their latches, chains fell to the ground, and the metal door creaked open; Revealing a dark padded hallway.

Luna didn't know what to expect and looked to Ryan questioningly as he walked away from the door. "What is it that I'm going to find in here?"

Discord placed a hand on either of Luna's shoulders, leaning so his face was just beside hers as he stared into the new hallway. "In this room, dear princess, is the sole reason that you and Ryan are seen as perfect mates." He explained, "You, just like him, have something living inside of you, something dark. A monster to both you and anypony around you."

She felt her own eyes widen. Was that truly the reason that they were matched; because they both had something sick and twisted living inside of them just trying to get out. "So, you mean that-"

"In this room is the part of him that is much like your Nightmare Moon."

She didn't tell him about that. She had referenced Nightmare Moon once or twice while talking about all of the bad things she had done, but she had never actually said it. There was no detail about the events that transpired, she never even said the name. "How did you-"

"The royal guards have big mouths and I am constantly listening in. Ryan knows all about Nightmare Moon."

Luna was shocked and thoughts of all kind started running through her head. How Ryan might feel about her past, about Nightmare Moon. Would he still want to be around her? Or would he completely avoid her? She had to know. "How does he feel about it?" What she heard in reply surprised her.

"Frankly, he couldn't give less of a fuck. To be honest, it makes him feel closer to you." He watched as Luna's features started to lighten up. "People in our world are violent, but he never knew anyone else with a problem like his until you came along." Ryan took a breath and nudged his head in the direction of the door. "Well, you wanted to see it. It's right in there."

She turned her attention back to the open door and took a deep breath before walking in, alone.

With his part out of the way, Discord decided that it was probably about time he had left. He already knew what was in there and didn't see too much of a point in going back. Besides, that thing was very rude to him last time. "Well, I guess I'll be off. Ta-ta." He said with a wave and vanished before anyone else could get a word in.

Luna took a few more steps into the hallway. Her hooves would sink into the odd flooring, feeling the soft pillow texture beneath her with every step. She jumped as the iron door behind her slammed shut and the locks all clicked back into place. Now she was alone and stuck in here. Terrific.

There was a single light at the end of the hallway that hung down from the ceiling in what appeared to be some sort of room. She cautiously made her way over to the room, the rattling of chains in the distance could be heard.

The sound picked up as a figure entered her vision from the far side of the room. After quickly analyzing the room, as well as the figure, she ceased any movement and stood her ground. The figure lowered itself before leaping at Luna. However, the night princess was just out of his reach. The chains let out a sound that indicated that they had reached their limit. This caused the figure to jerk backward and fall to the soft ground, just below the light.

Just like the last one; he looked completely identical to Ryan, but you could easily tell that there was something wrong with this one. She wasn't sure what truly gave it away; was it the bloodshot eyes, perhaps the dark rings around those eyes? Or maybe it was because he was dressed in what looked like white pajama pants and a straight jacket covered in blood and wrapped in thick metal chains that bound him to some solid structure behind him.

Better yet, it was probably all the the above.

She watched as he pulled himself up into a sitting position and glared at her. His mouth was shut and his teeth were bared, but his eyes were sending hundreds of death threats every second they looked at her. This made her extremely uncomfortable.

Just as Luna was about to speak to Ryan, he shot back to his feet, pulling against the chains with all his might in hopes that he might get to her. "Come on! Come here so I can pull your spine out of your ass! I'll kill you, you hear me!? I'LL KILL YOU!!!"

Luna didn't know what to do, he was in a frenzy and, from the looks of it, he wasn't going to calm down. As he struggled against the chains and howled like a mad-man Luna ran through every possible action she could take.

Happiness is finding someone who's insanity matches yours...

Suddenly an idea was hatched.

Two plus two is fish!

She charged her magic and a light blue hue suddenly enveloped her horn.

Show him that he's not alone...

There was a bright flash and now, being projected from Luna's horn, there was a tall black mare with a flowing blue mane and tail wearing a rather skimpy set of armor standing right in front of her.

The maniac stopped struggling against his restraints and stared at the mare, taking in every wonderfully placed curve of her body. He couldn't help but just stand there, not making a single sound.

Nightmare opened her eyes, revealing the teal colored orbs beneath their lids and scanned the room. It had been a while since she had seen much of anything and soon enough she found her eyes resting on the psychotic human before her.

She didn't know why, but she felt something about him, something strong, something that she liked. The darker half of the night princess made her way over to the restrained human, stopping just inches from his reach. "Now just who might you be?" She asked, reaching a hand out and stroking the side of his face.

It took him a moment to answer; the feeling of her hand caressing him sent shivers down his spine and made responding slightly difficult. "Ryan; My name is Ryan." He said calmly. What was with this mare, why did he feel so comfortable with her? He didn't care, he was enjoying this new feeling. He didn't want it to end.

Luna was actually shocked at how well that had worked. The two darker halves of both parties were actually enjoying each others company. She could feel a powerful bond forming between the two.

As she admired her work a sudden obnoxious beeping noise filled her ears. She covered them and closed her eyes, the noise becoming more than just annoying. When she opened her eyes to look for the source she found herself in her room, laying on her bed.

Turning her head to the side she found the source of the noise. Her alarm clock was going off, telling her that it was time to awake and lower the moon. Letting out a rather unpleasant sigh she raised her fist and slammed it down on the mechanism, silencing it until tomorrow.

Luna rose from her bed and stretched her limbs before exiting her room to find her older sister groggily standing in the hallway and waiting for her. Their bodies were clearly demanding that the two go back to bed, but they had a job to do. With a bit of magic the moon was lowered and the sun was raised.

With that taken care of, the sisters went their separate ways to prepare themselves for the rest of the day. Just as Luna was about to enter her room though, she was grabbed by something hiding behind her door. Had the sun not shined enough light to make out who her assailant was at the last second, she would have cast them into Oblivion.

As Ryan pulled Luna into his arms he placed a firm kiss on her lips, earning him a small but adorable squeak from the night princess.

When Ryan broke the kiss Luna stared up at him; she wasn't expecting him to just pop up out of no where and perform such an affectionate act out of the blue. "Well, somepony is feeling rather lovey-dovey today." she teased the human.

"Bite me." He replied jokingly, "I had a good night and I'm feeling pretty damn good myself."

Especially around her...I wonder why that is.

Ryan ignored his weird, but rather sarcastic sounding, thought and focused on the beautiful mare in front of him. He wasn't sure why, but for some reason he felt so much more comfortable around her. It was like part of him craved her and it was making him hungry for her attention.

Luna found it hard to resist staring up at the human longingly. She placed her hands behind his head and pulled him into another kiss. As they stood there with their lips embracing each other, the two could feel some strange sensation welling up inside of them. Something that told them that everything was alright, that this moment right here was perfect.

Playing Rough

Author's Note

WARNING: This chapter contains nudity, a sexually aggressive mare, and what could be considered a form of rape...Enjoy :P
-Lord Evil
P.S. This is the first ever sex-ish scene I have ever written, feel free to tell me how shitty it was.

Playing Rough

Luna hit the ground with a light thud, but with a quick re-angling of her body she was able to somersault back into a standing position. However, this only lasted a few second, as she was tackled back to the ground by her otherworldly guest. The two were sent back onto the hard surface, rolling over each other other as they fought for dominance over the other.

Ryan did his best to pin the mare he was currently wrestling, but soon found himself being pressed to the floor with a pair of hands holding his down. He struggled to free himself from her grip, but to no avail. She had beaten him.

"Dammit...Alright, you win." He confessed; he wasn't really a fan of losing, especially when it came to fights or wrestling, but he wasn't a sore loser. If he lost, he lost; there was always next time.

Luna stared down at the human with a strange look in her eyes. It was something Ryan had seen before, but he couldn't quite remember what it was. "Hey, you alright up there, sweetheart?"

His question was met with silence as Luna looked like she was about to attack him. Did he do something wrong? For once though, Ryan's luck kicked into full gear in the form of the alicorn sun god.

"Luna, what are you doing?" Celestia asked as she stumbled upon a rather interesting sight. Her little sister straddling their otherworldly guest and pinning him to the ground with a somewhat hungered expression on her face.

Luna snapped out of her strange mental state and shook her head before looking up at her sister, thinking of a thousand different ways to explain what was going on. "Tia, we were just wrestling! That's all." She said, quickly removing her hands from Ryan's arms to allow him his freedom.

Celestia was eyeing her sister with a somewhat reprimanding look to her features. It was like that look your parents give you when they walk into the room and find you stabbing all of their couch cushions with a kitchen knife...wait, sorry, that's a little bit, completely different. Maybe more like when they catch you doing something they said not to...Like putting the cat in the toilet.

"Sister, you know what this time marks for you, right?" The older sister reminded. Luna knew fully well what she was talking about, but was too ashamed to admit it. She didn't want to just keep herself locked up all day. She wanted to be with her mate, she wanted Ryan.

"But Tia, I just wanted to-"

"Luna! Please, you know as well as I do that if something were to happen that it could ruin everything you've worked for with him." She explained to the night princess.

She didn't want to, but she had to. Celestia was right, she was just about to lose herself just by fooling around with Ryan. She had to go away for a bit. "I'll be in my chambers." She said with a defeated tone, removing herself from Ryan's form and teleporting away.

Ryan pulled himself off of the ground, unsure of what had just transpired. "What was that all about? Is girl alright?" He asked, a small part of him being genuinely concerned, which actually kind of freaked him out. He wasn't used to caring about others, but for some reason, with her, he did.

Celestia sighed and looked over to Ryan, wondering if maybe the humans from his world suffered the same thing. She would have to explain it to him if otherwise. "It's...it's her time of the season, if you know what I mean."

A look of realization dawned on the human. "Oh, okay, I got you." She was menstruating, that's understandable. Hell, he grew up mostly around women and most of his friends were of the opposite sex so he knew how it was when they got this way. "The girls in my world have the same problem, I know exactly how to handle this."

Create an unbreakable barrier and throw chocolate at her. Bitches love chocolate, especially when they're bleeding like a sliced artery.

She smiled to herself, glad that he fully understood Luna's current predicament. "I'm gonna run and grab a few things, I'll see you in a bit, Tia."

"Stay safe." She said as she waved to the human who was now jogging through the halls. "Thank goodness he knows what a mares heat cycle is." She muttered to herself, "That could have ended very badly."

Ryan slowly opened the door to Luna's bedroom with a box of chocolate in one hand and a wooden chair in the other, just in case. Better safe than sorry; despite likely having to apologize later for hitting her with it, but that's only if he actually has to.

He looked around the dark room, seeing no sign of the lunar mare. "Hello? Lulu, you in here?" He was met with nothing but silence. Against his better judgement he entered the room, keeping a tight grip on his weapon of choice.

Once in, the door behind him slammed shut, causing him to jump and swing the chair. It ended up hitting the door and breaking into several small pieces, leaving him with only the back board in his hand. "God dammit!" He yelled, his paranoia forcing him to rapidly scan the room around him.

Again he found nothing, it was too dark. It was like a shitty version of the movie Pitch Black in here. He decided against going any further and just coming back later, but for some reason when he tried to open the door it wouldn't budge. He dropped everything in his hands and pulled with all of his might, but it didn't move in the slightest.

Did they bolt this thing shut, what the hell?

Ryan stopped trying to open it and attempted to kick it down, resulting in doing nothing but making a loud bang against the structure and slightly hurting his foot. "Motherfucker!" He yelled, hopping on his good foot, trying to wait for the pain in the other to subside.

He hobbled his way over to Luna's bed and took a seat on it, letting his aching appendage rest for a bit. That door was hard; it felt like he had just kicked an iron bar.

Before he could take the time to try and massage the pain out of his foot he felt something rather odd. It was like he was being watched, which was a feeling he was usually used to, given his odd mental state, but this one was different. Like there was something right behind him.

He turned his head around to see a pair of glowing teal orbs staring back at him, connected to a feminine figured silhouette. His eyes finally forced themselves to adjust enough to get a better look at whoever was behind him until he picked up on who it was. "Luna? Are you alright?"

Ryan felt himself suddenly being grabbed and thrown to the center of the large bed. The shock itself was enough to keep him in place, but the dark figure now straddling him played a damn good role in doing that as well.

Luna pinned him down in the same manner that she had earlier, holding him in place and staring down at him longingly. That look she had in her eyes then was nearly tripled now.

He finally recognized it, what that look she was giving him was. This was something he had seen a couple times before, but never as strong as this. It was lust, pure and raw, angry lust. The kind that could drive someone to force you into some rather uncomfortable predicaments, depending on which side you're on and who they are.

Um...Rape?

Before Ryan could get a word out his mouth was forced against Luna's. Before when they had kissed it was short and sweet with a little bit of passion on his side, but this was something entirely different. It was long, hard, and full of desire.

Like my dick!

He mentally sighed at the internal voice for being so weird. He could have sworn that his mind and that of some pervert freak were swapped at some point. His thoughts came to a grinding halts as Luna's tongue found it way into his mouth, but only for a second. It was weird how large her tongue was, usually his was the freakishly huge one. Ryan was born with the gift of a tongue that could come out and curl upward while still being able to go pass his chin. He learned pretty quickly how to use it to his advantage, porn is a hell of a thing, but this was something different.

Ryan turned his head, breaking the oral assault, making Luna almost whine. Once he had managed to catch his breath he looked up at the lustful mare above him with a questioning gaze. "Seriously, what the hell?"

"Please, Ryan." She begged, "Don't pull away from me. I need this, I need you." Luna released Ryan's arms long enough to grab his shirt and tear in half, exposing his upper body to the hungry mare. She lowered her head and planted a small row of kisses down his chest, running her fingers up and down his body.

His body was literally shaking as his arousal picked up, every touch sent shivers down his spine. He wanted this to continue, but some part of him kept nagging that it just wasn't right, that there was something severely wrong with this picture. With his now freed hands he grabbed Luna's horn and pulled her up from his form.

She gasped as he did this, her body begging for him to continue doing whatever it was he was doing, but nothing happened. Her eyes looked up to see him with a stern expression on his face. Fine, if he wasn't going to give her what she wanted then she would take it by force.

A rope suddenly appeared in front of Ryan's face. He could feel it wrapping around his wrists before forcing his arms up to the head of the bed where it tied itself in place, keeping his arms locked above his head.

Luna brought her head to his, staring at him with a disturbing grin. "Comfortable? I asked you nicely to let me have you, but since you're being stubborn, I'll just take care of it on my own." She had a very dominant look on her face. Ryan didn't want to admit it, but he was always very fond with the idea of being dominated and that was exactly what she was doing.

The night princess could see it in his eyes, she could feel it in her bond with him. He was enjoying this, allot. "Oh? So you like this kind of thing, hmm? Well then, maybe you and I can both have a little fun then."

Yes, please!

Luna smiled at the restrained human as he tried to make it look like he wasn't enjoying the treatment he was receiving, but she knew better, and she would make sure he'd show just how much he was enjoying it.

She lowered one of her hands to his pants where he had a moderately built tent growing little by little. When she found her target she gripped it through his pants, causing Ryan to inhale sharply and jerk to the side a bit. She wasn't going to allow him to pull away though and tightened her grip, which he only seemed to enjoy more.

Can you stop being a bitch and just let the woman ravage you!

Luna grabbed the zipper of his pants and pulled it down, allowing his hardened member to force its way out into the air. Luna stared at it for several second, making Ryan feel a bit self-conscious for the first time in years. He was probably an ant compared to a stallion, in his world he was considered decent in size, but what he lacked in that he made up for in performance.

Much to his surprise though, Luna continued her assault. He was sure she would laugh or giggle or something, but the only thing she seemed to notice was his lack of undergarments. "Walking around with nothing to hide I see, you're so naughty."

Really? That's considered naughty here?

The mare grabbed the base of Ryan's pulsating shaft and gave the head a slow and tender lick. His body contorted slightly at the feeling of her tongue on the most sensitive part of his body, this only continued as she placed the tip and her mouth and started gently suckling on it.

Ryan was never one for making any sort of noise when it came to this kind of thing, he had trained himself to be dead quiet for several reasons, but these small actions were enough to make him fill the room with a series of sharp breaths.

Luna's free hand soon found it's way into the opening of Ryan's zipper, her fingers rubbing against his sack before placing a firm grip on his balls and giving them a light but firm squeeze.

Ryan let out a light cry of pleasure as his hips jerked upward, forcing himself deeper into Luna's muzzle, which she seemed to enjoy. Her mouth suddenly lowered, slowing taking in his entire length, massaging every inch of it with her tongue.

Ryan was in a state of ecstasy as the feeling of her maw sent waves of pleasure throughout his body. That soon ended when he felt Luna's muzzle completely remove itself from his member. He tried to hide his disappointed expression, but before he could even register his own facial patterns he felt a new sensation taking over his length.

He looked down to see that Luna had slipped his saliva coated dick through the opening of her tank top, letting his cock slide in between her breasts and become trapped between the mountain of cleavage her small shirt created.

Luna looked down at her own chest as the head of Ryan's member poked out through the top of her massive chest, allowing her to lower her head and suck on the tip as she started to titfuck him.

Ryan lost all control of his lower body as it instinctively humped into her chest and mouth. His mind was completely lost at this point, the only feeling in his body being the warning signs of his approaching climax. It had been a good while since he had been sexually active, so it was no surprise that he already about to burst. He tried to warn her, but with his brain being as fuzzy at it was he couldn't seem to form the words. Luna seemed to know somehow and picked up speed. In a matter of seconds he finally popped off into her mouth, coating the inside of it with his warm seed.

Luna sucked harder as he finally finally reached his climax, making sure to greedily suck down every last drop as she ran her tongue across the very tip of his member. When he seemed to be completely drained she removed him from her mouth and climbed up his body, letting his cock slide out of her cleavage and rest against his jeans.

As she climbed up his body she forced him into another passionate kiss. At least she seems to have calmed down. However, there was quite the interesting conversation going on in Ryan's head now.

We let the girl play her game, we had our fun. Don't puss out now!

Come on, do it!

Luna's eyes suddenly wandered up to the restraints holding her human in place as the sound of them being pulled upon echoed in the silent room.

Do it, you faggot!

The roped holding him in place finally gave away and snapped, releasing him. Luna's was ready to use her magic to pin him back down, but rather than taking off like she thought he would, she found herself being grabbed and pinned down to the bed.

Ryan now had the upper hand and he planned on using it to the best of his abilities. He held her down as he started kissing her neck, occasionally nipping and biting it in several spots to test her sensitivity. When he was met with the desired reaction he knew he would have power over her very soon.

The human grabbed her shirt and gave it the same treatment she gave his, making sure to grab the bra she had beneath it as well. With one hard tug both of the garments concealing her chest were now just useless scraps of cloth laying about on the bed. He let go of her arms and placed his hands on her breasts, giving them a firm squeeze.

Luna moaned loudly as her sensitive chest was assaulted by the human on top of her. She couldn't help but moan louder when she felt Ryan's tongue running down from her neck to her chest and onto one of her nipples.

Ryan was a sucker for big boobs, he couldn't help it, so he made sure to give each one the attention it deserved; Massaging both with his hands while his tongue ran circles around the nipple, occasionally sucking on them as well as biting down just to get a more pleasant reaction. He repeated this several times, switching off between the two mountains on her chest until he felt it was time to take a step further.

He started licking down her chest, to her stomach, then to her waist, digging under her shorts with his saliva soaked appendage. If there was one thing he enjoyed, it was teasing. He loved to tease women with his over sized tongue, and just like them, she was enjoying every second of it.

The human wasn't as gentle with her shorts as she was with his jeans. Sliding his fingers down into the waist of the shorts he pulled hard and tore them out of the way, throwing the hunk of cloth off to the side. It's not like they would be of use for anything anymore. He ran his hands across her thighs, molding his fingers into the soft yet firm flesh. He could feel the powerful muscles in her legs contracting at his touch which just just made him want to do it more.

However, he had a job to do now, and he wasn't going to let her get away with basically raping him without any form of consequence. He grabbed her legs with his hands and pulled them apart before lowering his face down to her glistening sex; she was already soaked with her own fluids. This to him was just another sign that he was doing a good job, no point in stopping now.

Ryan licked up the lining of her slit, digging through her folds until he found his target, that magical little button that could make any woman scream in ecstasy. With it now in his line of sight, he attacked, dragging his tongue over it once just to hear her cry out in pleasure. With that little urge satisfied he dove right into his meal, letting his tongue run circles around her clitoris.

Luna's body was trembling, the feeling of him going down on her was unlike anything she had ever felt before. Despite her age, she had never actually had any suitors. Well she had suitors, but she kept turning them down; and whenever she was in heat she would hide out in her room until it passed. She was, by any and all definitions, a virgin. With these amazing waves of pleasure going through her body though, she began to mentally question why she hadn't done this sooner. Her thoughts became lost though as she felt an entirely new sensation gracing her sensitive button.

Ryan had more than enough experience to know that there are certain things you have to do and there are certain things you should never do. He found a middle ground with this one and would use it as often as he could. Keeping track of her clit with his tongue he pressed his face deeper into her and gently massaged it with his teeth, giving it a light nibble as he did so and letting it grind against the edge of the solid surface.

It was at that moment where Luna lost all control of her body. He legs wrapped around his head and pulled him deeper into her as she literally screamed in pleasure. The human, now trapped between the powerful vice grips known as the female thighs, felt a wave of fluids filling his mouth. This was more than enough to tell him that this mare was spent, all he had to do was survive.

Sir, if our head pops like a watermelon right now, just know that we died for a good cause.

As Luna was finally starting to come down from her orgasm the two heard the sound of her bedroom door opening, revealing a tall white alicorn with a look of concern on her face. "Luna! I heard you scream, what hap..." Her words faded as she looked down at her sister who was currently naked on her bed with a familiar hairless creatures head being held between her thighs.

Ryan managed to wiggle his head out of Luna's sex just enough to look up and see the mare standing in the door. "...Fuck!"

It was for a good cause!

He knew he was royally fucked.

Hehe, puns.

There was not point in running, he would just get caught again. So he pulled Luna's legs apart and climbed off of the bed before raising arms in determined submission. "Have at thee, villain!"

Bring it, bitch!

Sick Day

Ryan shuddered as the feeling of hot water washed over his body, the warmth tickling his senses as he let the liquid engulf his body, giving him some relief to his current ailment. All started well when he woke up that morning, then the migraine kicked in, causing him severe pain in the back of his head and soon extreme nausea which was followed by an occasional emptying of his stomach.

Oh god, just kill me now. Take a gun and shoot us in the fucking face, please!

Ignoring his own mental cries of agony the human let his body collapse in the shower, going into an almost fetal position as he silently prayed to whatever deity that may hear him to take this awful feeling away.

After nearly an hour of remaining immobile in the bathroom he heard a faint knocking at the door. "Go away! I don't want your damn girl-scout cookies." He mumbled to whoever was trying to interrupt his self-treatment.

Luna stood on the other side of the door, after knocking she called his name and asked if he was okay. She knew he was in there, as she could hear the shower running and a light mumbling in response to her questioning.

Unsure of what else to do, she entered to bathroom, only to be met by a giant cloud of steam. This likely came from the running water; the air was humid as she entered. Just how hot did he have that thing?

The mare made her way over to the shower and pulled the curtain aside just enough to peak into the shower and found his bi-pedal hairless form laying on the floor of the tub.

Instinctively she grabbed Ryan by the arm and rolled him partially onto his back, just enough to where she could see his face. He looked terrible. Minus the redness of his skin due to the high temperature of the water, he was completely pale, his barely opened eyes had dark rings around them and she could sense a great deal of pain coming from within him.

"Oh my goodness." She gasped, "Ryan, are you okay?"

He tried to respond but his body started to convulse and he rolled over, getting up on his hand before promptly throwing up all over the tub flooring. Luckily, with the help of the running water, the contents of his stomach were washed down the drain before he could collapse back onto the hard structure with a groan.

Fuck life...

Luna turned her head back to the bathroom's entrance. "Guards!" She yelled, causing two thestral guards to enter and stand at attention. "I require a nurse immediately!"

They nodded and were gone in less than a second, leaving Luna with her ill human. She looked back down at Ryan and began gently caressing his face. "You're going to be okay, I promise."

With the help of her magic, Luna managed to get the human out of the shower and dry him off, not bothering to put clothes on him as she led him to his bed and tucked him in with a worried expression on her face. Minutes later a bright white unicorn mare dressed in all white clothing entered the room. "You summoned me, princess?"

Luna looked over to the medical personnel she had called for and nodded. After explaining how she had found Ryan the nurse examined his body, scanning him with her magic every so often to get a proper reading on his condition. She jotted down some of her findings on to a clipboard before turning her attention back to the night princess.

"Well?" Luna stated curiously, hoping it was nothing serious.

The nurse looked back down at her notes and thought about her findings before coming to a definite conclusion. "I wouldn't worry too much if I were you. From the looks of it I would have to say that he is suffering from a severe migraine." She explained. "We have some medications that can help, but this is a difficult thing to combat. The effects can last anywhere from a few hours to a few days."

She held out her hand and a small pill bottle appeared. "Here, give him one of these, it should help with the pain. If we're lucky it might even make the symptoms go away faster."

Luna let out a audible sigh of relief. She was happy this wasn't something too serious, but wasn't keen on the idea of him being in pain for so long. She reached over and grabbed the bottle from the nurse's hand, examining it as it entered her own. "You say that this could last a few days?"

"Yes, but that's the worst case. Just give him one of those to help; other than that, all we can do is keep him in bed and let this run its course."

She nodded and thanked the nurse before letting her return to her station. Once gone Luna made her way to the bed, taking a seat by Ryan's side. He didn't wasn't too happy with her trying to put medication down his throat, but he wasn't exactly cooperating with her when she tried to be nice about it.

Eventually he submitted due to the amount of pain it caused him to fight back and, thanks to the night princesses magic, fell into a deep sleep.

Luna wanted to stay by his side, but time was flying by and Night Court was fast approaching, she would soon have to leave to attend her royal duties. However, she couldn't just leave him here alone. Perhaps she could do something to make sure he wouldn't have to be.

It was a rather quiet day in Ponyville, which didn't pose too much of a problem to one particular lavender alicorn.

Twilight sat peacefully in her throne room, reading one of the many books that Celestia had sent her way upon her coronation. She wasn't complaining that the day was so uneventful, all of her friends were busy either working or running errands, which gave her time to catch up on some much needed reading. After all, what could be more fun than books!

Her attention was pulled out of her book as she heard a familiar belching come from a nearby room. Knowing what that meant she placed a book mark where she had left off so she wouldn't lose her place and waited.

Spike entered the room not even a second later, holding a scroll with Luna's royal seal bared on it's front. "Twilight, you've got mail."

The lunar princess waited patiently for the arrival of her sister's once protege, checking the clock every so often. Just five more minutes before she would have to leave. For a little while she didn't think she would make it on time, but as luck would have it a soft knock came from the bedroom door. "Princess Luna, are you in there?"

Luna rose from her seat and opened the door, greeting the young alicorn on the other side before filling her in on what had happened earlier that day. "I couldn't just leave him all alone here, it wouldn't feel right. I would really appreciate it if you would do this for me."

Twilight smiled at Luna, "It's no problem at all. I'd be happy to watch over him." Much to her surprise, Luna pulled Twilight into a hug. After the shock wore off she returned the embrace and Luna went off to perform her royal duties.

Once she was gone Twilight entered the room fully, removing a small backpack she had brought with her. The letter specified that this could go anywhere from a few hours to a few days, so she made sure to bring a few necessary needs; those being a few pairs of clothes and books.

She grabbed a chair from a nearby desk and placed it beside the bed, letting herself take a seat next to the sleeping human without getting too close. Once seated her eyes scanned his face. He didn't look well at all. In her studies of illnesses she had learned a lot, but it never hurt to double check.

Twilight levitated her bag to her side a pulled out a book on pony health and illnesses. She opened it and went through the index to find what she was looking for. "Let's see here, migraines, migraines, mi-aha!" She quietly celebrated, finding where the topic she wanted to look over was. She flipped through the pages and found the section on migraines. "Let's see here; A migraine is a severe, painful headache that can be preceded or accompanied by sensory warning signs such as flashes of light, blind spots, tingling in the arms and legs, nausea, vomiting, and increased sensitivity to light and sound. The excruciating pain that migraines bring can last for hours or even days."

She couldn't help but frown a bit at this as she looked back up at the human laying as still as a corpse in the bed. She felt bad for him having to go through this. She also levitated a garbage can from the bathroom over to the bedside, better safe than sorry. Maybe if she read a bit more she would find a way to help him. "Hmm...Symptoms; A severe, throbbing headache, sometimes concentrated on only one side of the head or around one eye lasting between four and seventy-two hours. A headache that worsens with exertion. Extreme sensitivity to light, so painful to the eyes and head that it requires retreat to a darkened room."

She looked around to see that the lights were on. Using her magic she turned off the lights and made a small glow from her horn so she could continue to read about the subject. "Migraine headaches are caused by blood vessel enlargement and the release of chemicals from nerve fibers surrounding these blood vessels." Before she could continue to read on she heard a light groaning coming from the bed.

Ryan forced his eyes open. The room was dark, but his eyes made quick work of adjusting to it. He noticed a significant drop in the level of pain he felt in the back of his head, but still, he should probably check in. "Brain, status report!"

Light headache in the normal spots, not too much damage done. We're probably gonna be a bit fuzzy up here for the rest of the day, so take it easy. We should be back at one hundred percent by tomorrow as long as you don't do anything stupid.

"So, we're fucked?"

Pretty much.

Ryan sighed, maybe this time around he won't run around and act like a complete jackass. He'd rather just be lazy for the rest of the day so he'll feel better tomorrow.

Twilight stared at him in complete and utter confusion. Who was he talking to? Was he actually talking to his brain? Is this some weird thing that humans do?...Does it actually respond???

The human rolled onto his side, with his vision fully adjusted to the darkness, he would be able to see her perfectly, but that wasn't the case. He rolled over to see Twilight with a light coming off of her horn, a light that actually caused him a bit of pain in his eyes. "Ow, fuck!"

Twilight squeaked, realizing the error she had just made, and turned off the magical light. She knew he wasn't feeling well, why didn't she turn it off when he started waking up? Stupid, stupid, stupid! "I'm so sorry! Are you okay?"

Ryan rubbed his eyes with his hands, forcing himself into a sitting position. "Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry about it." He replied before putting a closed fist to his mouth and coughing a few times.

Ow, ow, fuck! No coughing! Stop!

He grimaced in pain and rubbed the back of his head. He forgot that when his mind says 'Take it easy' it means 'Try not to exist and do normal human stuff'.

Twilight was relieved that he was okay and was actually moving a bit, but wasn't so sure it was the best idea in his current state. Then again, would he get mad if she tried to reprimand him for it? She had only seen him once and that was on his first day here, which ended in him sprinting through the halls to get away from her and the princesses.

Maybe if she took it slow he would respond better. "How are you feeling?"

Ryan ran his fingers through his hair; It was kind of a gross experience. His hair was greasy and left a slick feeling on his fingers. "A lot better than I was earlier." He replied, noting that he should take a shower later.

Maybe one that involves you actually getting clean rather than just laying down like a dead fish.

"That's good." She replied, being genuinely happy that he was feeling better. But still, staying in bed would probably be the best for him right now. The book did say that the headache would get worse if he exerted himself. "But maybe you should lay down, I don't think you'd want to agitate your body."

As much as he would have loved to argue with her on how he knew his body better than her, she was kind of right. If he got up and started moving around it might end badly. He was feeling better, but he was also still a bit nauseous. Movement might end in vomit, which would not be pleasant. He could tell from the burning in his throat that if he were to throw up now it would be nothing but bile and that would hurt...allot.

So he complied and laid back down, making sure to face her, he wasn't planning on going back to bed any time soon. Now that he thought about it, why was Twilight in his room watching him sleep? "So, what are you doing in here?"

She smiled a bit. Although she hadn't been here to watch his and Luna's relationship grow, Celestia made sure to write about how close they were getting every so often. "Because you have a very caring marefriend who didn't want to leave her coltfriend alone while he was sick."

God damn horse puns, they will never end!

He wasn't surprised by this at all. He could tell that Luna cared deeply for him, he cared almost as much about her; but in all honesty, that kind of scared him. He wasn't used to this kind of affection being given to him, nor was he used to giving it in turn. "I should have known. I swear, that woman cares too much about me."

Twilight giggled at this sentiment. "I don't know, maybe she loves you." She teased.

The idea of this actually scared him even more. Would he be able to care for her in the same way? Would he be able to return that kind of affection completely and do everything right? The only reason he actually worried about this was due to past experiences. Never before had he actually been able to give the women he was with what they deserved, whether that be love or an ass-kicking varied on the person.

Regardless, he wasn't going to let this mare tease him without giving her a taste of her own medicine. "Well maybe, I love you." He said, earning him a wide eyed, shocked expression from Twilight. He reached over and grabbed one of the chair legs, pulling it so she would be closer to him. "Maybe I don't want to be with Luna, perhaps my preferences go toward one with more of a...purple complexion."

Twilight blushed heavily at this, whether it was out of fear or flattery was unknown to her. Her body became as still as a statue as he brought his face closer to hers. "Ryan, what are you-"

He place a finger to her lips and shushed her. "Don't talk, just feel." He said, making his voice as sultry as a man could. He waited a few seconds before leaning closer to her and poking her nose. "Boop!"

You sir, are evil and I love it!

The alicorn placed a hand on her muzzle and watched as Ryan rolled onto his back, laughing at her. Part of her was relieved, for a minute there she actually thought he was trying to make a move on her. Honestly, she had no idea what she would do if he had. However, with this little event now being completely unfolded, she couldn't help but wear an annoyed expression. He did all of that just to boop her nose.

Once Ryan had calmed down from his laughing fit he looked over at Twilight who's horn was glowing. He could do nothing but wonder; What is this mare planning? God he was really starting to hate this whole magic thing.

These ponies are OP!

"You know what?" Twilight began, "You're grounded."

"Grounded? From what?"

"These!" She said, using her magic to yank all the covers off of the bed and throwing them on to the floor. "Let's see how you-" She fell dead silent as she looked at Ryan, her eyes widening with shock once again as a massive blush began spread across her features.

He looked down to see that he was completely naked and with the blankets gone he was now utterly exposed to the young mare sitting just inches away from him. Ryan was in shock as well, he had no idea how this was going to play out.

I know what to do...

Ryan couldn't help but smile as the gears in his brain started turning. He propped his head up with one arm and used his free hand to trace his body from the bottom of his neck down to his waist. "Yes, Miss Sparkle. Paint me like one of your french whores."

Our Second Date

Celestia watched as Ryan dressed himself; throwing on a clean pair of blue jeans and a black t-shirt. She wondered what was going through his mind right now. She knew that tonight was supposed to be his and Luna's second date, but if that's the case why was he dressing so casually? Shouldn't he be wearing a suit? This time around Ryan was the one setting everything up, so she had no clue what was going to happen.

"If you two are going on a date then shouldn't you be wearing something more formal?" Celestia asked, completely unaware of Ryan's plans for the evening.

"I would, but I don't think you'd like what would happen to it in the process." He explained. "From what I can see, Luna is allot like me, so fancy dinners at expensive restaurants are not the way to go. I prefer little more adventure than that, and if she is the way I'm actually perceiving her, then she will prefer this alternative."

Celestia couldn't help but giggle a bit at this. He was really doing his best to search for things her sister would enjoy doing. "Look at you; analyzing my sister and trying to please her. If I didn't know any better, I'd say you're really starting to like her." She teased.

Ryan put on a serious expression. "Actually, I am known for being a notorious woman beater. I like to take my women out into the middle of the woods and bludgeon them half to death with a baseball bat covered in nails."

...well damn...

Wow...She knew that he wasn't being serious, but in her eyes joking like that was just uncalled for. "That was not funny." She said, wearing a serious expression of her own.

"It was to me!" He replied with a laugh. Once that was out of his system he picked up the bag he had with him upon his arrival and started throwing a bunch of items out of it. "No, no, nope. Don't need you, don't need you...might need you."

She watched as he threw a multitude of items out of his bag; a plastic block with a cord on it, a small black umbrella, a plastic bag with toiletries, sewing supplies, a small knife with a skull handle, a mallet, a pick hammer, a rusty hatchet. "What in the wide wide world of Equestria would you need any of those for?"

"Believe it or not, everything in this bag has saved my sweet ass at least once." He said, pulling out his brothers handgun and examining it. He thought back to the day that he had avenged his brothers death by taking out the bastards that killed him. Thinking back, he had pulled the gun out on one of them, but only pulled the trigger once.

Ryan opened the magazine to see that it was one bullet short of being full before pushing it back in and making sure the safety was still on. This would be coming with him. It was all he had left to remember his brother. With that in mind he shoved it into the bag and went over to grab a spare set of clothes.

Celestia couldn't help but eye the weapon. She had no idea what it was, but she could see that it meant allot to Ryan from the look in his eyes when he grabbed it. She decided it would probably be best not to ask about it. In fact, what she thought was important was the fact that Ryan was grabbing some of his own clothes as well as some that belonged to Luna.

"Ryan, why do you have a pair of my sisters clothing?" She asked, seeing the black shorts and tank top he grabbed from on top of his dresser hidden among his own.

"Backup." He simply replied, shoving the clothing into his bag. "Where we're going, we might need something to change into afterward."

"Where are you going?" She finally asked, her curiosity finally getting the better of her.

Ryan sighed. "If you must know, I am taking her on a hike through the woods." He could see a look of fear come across Celestia's features, but quickly corrected his error. "I'm not taking her to the Everfree or anything like that, I already know enough about that place to keep it off limits. But, I did find a wooded area nearby and I thought it would be a nice place to hangout for a bit."

Celestia seemed to calm down as he said this. She was worried that the two were about to get themselves killed for a moment there. Maybe letting Ryan wander around outside and socializing with other ponies was a good thing. He seemed to be learning more and more about Equestria every time he went out.

With her nerves now settled and the thoughts of them running into a potentially dangerous situation now out of her mind, she smiled up at the human. "Very well. Just promise me that you will be careful and come home safely."

Ryan shrugged. "I can promise you that we will come back, but that's about it." He said as he leaned onto his bed, using his arms to keep him in a somewhat standing position.

Celestia raised a brow at him. "What do you mean? I thought you said you were just going on a hike."

He chuckled a bit. "Sweetheart, if you only you knew how me and my friends would go on hikes."

Ryan hit the ground hard, rolling as he did so to reduce the impact as much as he could. Doing this though only made his body tumble down the hill until he slammed into a collapsed tree at the bottom. With his body slightly beat up and scratched a little bit of everywhere, he rolled onto his back and looked up at the sky. It was difficult to see with all of the surrounding trees, but there was enough room for him to get a good eyeful of the bright sun above him.

"Ryan!"

"Holy shit, is he still breathing?"

He looked over to find the source of the voices that echoed through the woods. Both had come from on top of a two story rock at the top of the hill. These voices belonged to two of Ryan's friends. Both stood slightly taller than him. The oldest was Reggie, he had short brown hair and was dressed in all black, minus a vest that was half black and half grey. The second voice belonged to Alex, the youngest of the group who had black hair and donned a pair of red and black pants, a black shirt, and a red beanie.

Ryan lifted his right hand toward them before promptly raising his middle finger to the two.

"Yep, he's fine."

"Asshole!"

He chuckled as the they made their way down to him. He had more than enough time to pull himself back to his feet and inspect his body. Aside from a few cuts and bruises he was in perfect condition. Thank god he left his phone in the car, otherwise it would have been destroyed.

That was really, REALLY stupid. You could have just climbed down, but nooo. Mr. Badass over here has to jump off like a fuckin' retard!

Ryan couldn't help but laugh at that moment. He knew what he had done was stupid as all hell, but fuck it, it was fun. He took a seat on the collapsed tree he had become very well acquainted with and waited for his friends to come down to his level.

The first to get to him was Reggie who took one look at Ryan's beat-up body and laughed at him. "Man that was funnier than hell. You rolled down this motherfucker like a rag-doll."

Alex made it over shortly after. "Dude, are you okay? That looked like it hurt."

Ryan nodded, "Oh it did, it hurt allot." He said with a smile, "But we still got a full day ahead of us and I aint ready to stop."

"That's the spirit!" Reggie yelled holding out a hand to help Ryan back to his feet. "Alright, how about we go down the the creek and see if we can't climb out way over to the other side again."

"Sounds like a plan."

Despite the memories of home and his friends, Ryan found himself barely missing any of it. He was always very quick to adapt to things on a mental level. He didn't know how he was able to do it, but it came in handy so he would rather just accept it as it is than question it and end up fucking himself in the long run.

As he thought back to his life on earth, he remained seated just outside of the castle walls, waiting for Luna to arrive so he could commence his plan. He looked up at the night sky, seeing countless stars and the bright white moon just above him. He always loved to look up at the moon, even as a child he felt he had some sort of connection with it. Even as he got older he still basked in its glory. Some nights he would go outside with a plastic chair and just stare at it for hours upon hours. Sometimes he would even find himself talking to it, just speaking about random nothings into the night sky.

Luna arrived after a short while wearing her signature outfit; Black shorts and tank top with a small black jacket. As she made her way over to Ryan she could see that he was staring blankly at the moon. This made her blush slightly. Every night when she went to see him he was always like this, just sitting outside and staring longingly at the moon, her moon.

She made her way over to his side and tapped his shoulder, making him jump slightly as he looked over to her. She giggled a bit, he was always easily startled when he wasn't paying attention. "Hello, Ryan." She said with a grin. "I believe you and I have a date to commence."

"Damn right." He replied with a smile. "Come on."

The two walked for nearly fifteen minutes before coming upon a forest. This confused Luna a bit. He had told her to dress as she normally would and to be ready. She wasn't exactly sure what he meant by ready, but if this was going to be anything like the last date they were on it would involve allot of physical activity.

She looked around at the heavily wooded area. "What are we-" Before she could finish her question Ryan took off into the forest, sprinting through the trees as if he were being chased.

Luna couldn't help but smile at this. So tonight is going to be fun. She took off after him, watching as he dodged trees and leaped over obstacles to get to wherever he was going. Mimicking his movements she was able to catch up to him in record time, soon running by his side.

The two glanced at each other and shot the other a smile before continuing their run. They soon came to a small clearing where a creek had formed, likely many years ago. Ryan's eyes quickly scanned the area for a way around or otherwise. He spotted a low hanging branch near the center of the creek and picked up speed, making himself run a bit further ahead than Luna. He leaped up and grabbed the branch, using it to propel his body forward. Once he let go his body flew right over the clear waters below and he landed on the other side, stopping to wait for Luna.

Luna was able to spot the branch thanks to Ryan's previous actions and decided to try out his tactics rather than simply flying over. She leaped up and grabbed the branch, only for it to break and send her plummeting into the water. The current wasn't strong, and was only deep enough to meet her chest. She re-surfaced and took a breath, a slight blush of embarrassment spreading across her face as Ryan looked down at her and laughed.

She heard a slight clicking sound and a soft thud before looking up to see Ryan jumping into the creek. "Cannon ball!"

Ryan made a large splash as he hit the water. However, he had no idea how shallow it was, resulting in his a rather painful meeting between his ass and the soaked gravel below. He re-surfaced with a pained expression. "Ow...fuck!"

Now it was Luna's turn to laugh at him, earning herself a splash to the face from the human. She looked over at him as he glared at her with a playful expression on his face. She shot him the same look, accepting his challenge before splashing him back. This war went on for several minutes before Ryan could finally get close enough to tackle Luna, holding both of them under the water.

He released her when the need for air became too much and they re-surfaced, gasping for air.

Luna, doing her best to catch her breath was then grabbed from behind. At first she thought Ryan was attacking once again, but found that he followed up with nothing. He was just standing there, holding her. She could help but smile as he wrapped his arms around her and held her in place.

She made him loosen his grip, allowing her to turn around. They both stood there for a moment, just holding each other and enjoying the others company.

Ryan pulled back slightly, allowing him to look into Luna's eyes. She really was the most beautiful creature he had ever seen. He couldn't figure out why he was so attracted to her or why he was so comfortable around her. Frankly, he didn't care. He was happy to have someone like this in his life, someone he could talk to and be himself with. Someone who looked pretty damn sexy in shorts, especially soaking wet.

Are you just gonna stand here with your thumb up your ass? Kiss the girl, you faggot!

He smiled, doing his best not to laugh at his own thoughts and pulled her closer to him, planting a gentle kiss on her lips. Luna was eagerly waiting for him to do this and recuperated in response, pulling herself deeper into their oral embrace.

Once the two were done sharing this romantic moment they climbed out of the water. Luna made a comment about how they were going to be soaked all night, but that's when Ryan's master plan came into fruition. He more expected them to get covered in dirt and mud, but this was just as good a reason. He pulled out the spare clothing he had grabbed and handed Luna hers. They then went their seperate ways to get changed.

Ryan couldn't help but peek over at Luna as she changed, watching her slim wet form strip down to literally nothing. Her naked body was practically glowing in the moonlight, showing off all of her wonderful curves; from her large perky breasts to her soft round flanks. The way she moved though was what really drew him in, it was almost like she was putting on a show. He forced himself to stop staring when he felt his excitement rising and went on to changing into his dry clothes.

She could feel his gaze on her and honestly she didn't mind it in the slightest. She loved the fact that they were connecting on an emotional level, but knowing that he found her physically attractive felt good. It made her feel desirable. With this in mind she made sure to strip down slowly to tease him and even positioned her body so that he could get a nice view of her figure from the side. When she felt his gaze leave her she decided it was only fair to look in turn.

Luna peeked over and watched his wet fur-less form removed his clothing. He wasn't the strongest looking creature she had ever seen, but his body had an appealing tone to it. His biceps were well shaped and his stomach was showing where a six pack was trying to force its way onto him. His little friend seemed a bit smaller than it was when they had their incident a few days ago, but that was likely due to the cold water they were just in.

Ryan felt as though he was being watched. Usually when he felt this it was because someone was out to get him and he would start frantically looking around for whoever was trailing him. Not this time though, this one seemed almost comforting, never the less he re-position himself soon after sliding on a dry pair of pants.

The front of his body had a very decent tone to it, the back of his body was a whole other story. His muscles were very well defined, he could probably pick up both her and her sister with little effort. The perverse thoughts that soon flooded her mind after that became too much and she averted her gaze.

Once they were both dressed and mostly dried off Ryan stuffed the wet clothes in his bag and threw it over his shoulder. They continued their journey to wherever Ryan was taking them, this time walking and having idle conversations on their way. Luna tried to ask him where he was taking them, but he refused to tell her.

They eventually came to a hill where the trees seemed to lessen in number the higher they went. Once the made it to the top there were no trees around them. Just the open air and the sky above. Ryan made his way to the highest pint and tossed his bag to the ground before planting himself on the ground, patting the spot next to him so Luna would join him.

She smiled and sat by his side and they looked up at the night sky, once again in complete silence, just enjoying each others presence. Luna felt Ryan's arm slide over her shoulder and she leaned into him. "Tonight has been lovely. Thank you, Ryan."

He chuckled before responding. "If anything I should be thanking you."

She gave him a curious look. "Why?"

"Well, if I didn't have someone like you at my side then I'd just be out here all alone."

"You're the one who brought us out here." She commented.

"Yes, but you're the whole reason I wanted to." He snapped back.

"You're still the one who brought me though!"

And so they went on, having another one of their verbal assault challenges. Ryan couldn't help starting these, he enjoyed pestering her. Luna would never admit it to him, but she enjoyed them just as much. Being able to have playful arguments was not just fun, but it made them feel closer.

Deep within the castle a portal opened, rippling time and space around it as it did so. It began to close, but before it did, something fell through, something alive. A bipedal figure rose from the ground, looking around the empty room. She had brown hair and dark skin and wore what could only be seen as military combat suit.

Karma's A B**ch

Karma's A B**ch

"The castle has a club!?" Ryan asked, damn-near shouting as he did so. He and Luna had taken to sitting around in his room and talking for hours shortly after he arrived and that was exactly what they were doing. While he knew allot about the castle from simply wandering around, he had never gotten an official tour and never bothered to look around too much. It would become boring after a while.

"Indeed it does," Luna began, her head resting on his lap as she spoke, confirming what she had told him earlier while talking about things she enjoyed doing in her spare time before he came around. She didn't necessarily like hanging out in the club, but it was a nice place to unwind from time to time. "but it's only open on the weekends."

Ryan went silent as he counted the days in his head. "Yesterday was Friday, so that means today is Saturday..." If his calculations were right then Saturday was classified as a weekend. It's open tonight!

No shit, Sherlock!

"Oh, this is going to be great..."

Luna just looked at him for a moment. She had no idea he was actually the kind of person who enjoyed parties. Yeah, he's a bit goofy sometimes and acts like a child here and there, but she just never saw him as being one to enjoy such festivities. "You're interested in going?"

"Interested?" He asked in mock surprise before actually moving into a somewhat serious tone, while still managing to sound like a playful idiot. "I fucking love clubs. The music, the dancing, the drinks! When does it open?"

She looked up at the clock so she would be able to give him an accurate answer. It was around six o'clock now. "It should open in about a half hour. I'll have to attend Night Court by then, but I doubt there will many ponies coming on a Saturday night." She explained. "Perhaps I could join you when it's over?"

"Do you really have to ask?" Was his response. Honestly, it's her castle, she can do whatever she wants. He wasn't sure why she was asking, but he would be more than happy for her to come. It's likely she'll end up having to drag his body out by the end of it, which he would prefer rather than some random pony he didn't know. "When everything's all taken care of just come down and find me. I shouldn't be hard to spot."

"What makes you think that?" Yes, he was a human, so finding him would be relatively easy. Her bond with him was also more than enough for her to find him, she could always feel when he was near. But, she was curious as to why he was saying it.

"Trust me, you'll see." He said with a grin plastered across his face.

She couldn't believe her eyes. After she had landed in that room she had fallen unconscious for a time and upon waking wandered around to see quite the sight. Colorful anthropomorphic type creatures were wandering the halls of the building she was in. Some were even dressed as guards. She knew her mental state wasn't the best, but this was ridiculous.

After taking a few breaths and calming herself she managed to sneak by allot of the residents within this castle-like structure. Looking out of a few windows she could see that it was dark and after running by a clock on one of the walls she had learned that it was nearly eight at night.

"Get a hold of yourself, Brittany." She said to herself, running her fingers through her dark hair. "This is just some weird dream and you're going to wake up soon."

She couldn't help but continue mentally arguing with herself about whether or not any of this was actually real. Reaching for a knife she had sheathed in her boot and pulling it out, she held it to her arm and cut it, wincing slightly at the pain. Yep, this was real. She didn't know how it was real, but this was more than enough proof for her.

Brittany slid the blade back into her boot and examined her wound. It was deep enough to draw blood, but barely, she would live. At that moment a song began playing, one that she recognized. It was only coming from a short distance away.

She followed the noise until she found an open door surrounded by more of these creatures. There were lights coming from inside of the room and the song became clearer the closer she got to it. The ponies soon walked off and she moved in closer to get a better look at what was going on.

Once she was by the door she leaned her head just enough to get a good look at the events going on within. It looked fairly similar to a party, kind of like the ones they would have for a high school prom, but the song being played was definitely far from being school appropriate.

As she stared at the flashing lights she felt a sudden rush of blood go to her head and started thinking back to the night of her first prom nearly two years ago where she had met the most wonderful person.

Brittany stood off in a dark corner, she was wearing a bright purple strapless dress and was standing away from everyone else, looking at her so-called date on the other side of the room. He had asked her to go with him, picked her up, then left her to go make out with one of her friends.

The young woman let out a sad sigh as a lone tear worked its way down her cheek. A slow song started to play, turning what was a chaotic mess into a cesspool of cheesy slow dancing. She was about to go back to her date and give him another chance, only to watch him walk off into the bathroom with the girl he had abandoned her for.

She couldn't help it, she sank to the floor and started to break down. This night was supposed to be perfect. She had found the perfect dress and what she thought was the perfect guy, and now it was ruined.

A strange barrage of colorful lights entered her vision, causing her to look up. In front of her was a guy dressed in black dress pants and a vest that was resting on a blue dress shirt with its sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He had light skin and short blonde hair, his eyes were bright blue and his body was wrapped completely in glow sticks of all colors.

He was crouched down in front of her, just smiling. It was kind of weird at first, she was about to send him away until he spoke. "How's it going?" He asked playfully.

She grimaced at him, he was probably just some pig looking to take her into one of the stalls. "What do you care?" She asked with venom in her words.

"What I seek, madam, is knowledge." Brittany gave him a look of confusion. Was this one of those weird nerd guys who actually came to school to learn just trying to talk to her? "You see, there is a slow song playing and in front of me is a very beautiful woman slumped down in a corner crying. Sorry, sweetheart, but that doesn't seem right to me."

Brittany wasn't sure how to respond to him. Should she tell him why she was doing what she was doing or simply send him away. Before she could generate a response, he lifted his thumb to his mouth and licked it before dragging it along the underside of her eyes. She could only assume this was because her crying had made some of her mascara run down her face.

The mystery man got to his feet and started yanking the glow sticks from his body. Once they were off and now decorating the floor around him he held a hand down to her. "Come on." He said, "A pretty girl like you doesn't deserve to miss out on something like this."

She didn't know if it was out of weakness or something else, but she reached up and took his hand, allowing him to bring her back to her feet. The guy didn't bother taking her over to the massive group of slow dancers, which she was pretty happy about, she didn't feel like being around people at the moment.

Instead he took her arms and placed them around his neck before respectively placing his hands just above her waist and moving her body with his. Her face just kind of went still, she was confused and wasn't sure what to do. All she could do was stare at the smiling young man who had just randomly come over and started dancing with her.

A strange sense of comfort washed over her, causing her to smile back at him. She didn't know what she had done to deserve this, or if his kind display as well as his intentions to just simply dance with her were purely genuine, but she was enjoying it. Despite how weird the situation was, she was happy someone had come to comfort her, even it was some stranger from her school. On top of that he was pretty cute in her eyes.

The song ended and went back to it's upbeat party tone. The two separated and Brittany stared at him with an appreciative expression. "Thanks, I guess I kind of needed that."

He shrugged, before crouching down to pick up the glow sticks and reattach them to his body. "It's no problem."

Brittany was about to walk back over to her corner, but stopped when she felt a hand on her shoulder. She turned around to see Matt, the guy that had asked her to prom in the first place and shot him a dirty look.

Matt was glaring daggers at her. "Who the hell is that guy?" He asked, pointing at the man who had danced with her just minutes ago.

She looked over at him before turning her attention back to Matt. "He's no one, just someone who offered to dance with me."

"That's not how this works!" He snapped, "I asked you here, you were supposed to dance with me!"

"While you're off making out with my friends and fucking them in the bathroom!?"

Matt's angered expression only grew before he gave her a hard shove, forcing her to hit the wall and fall down. Before continuing his assault, he turned around, having felt a slight tapping on his shoulder.

In an instant a blur of colorful lights entered his vision before he felt something strike him in the side of the head, causing him to collapse and pass out.

Brittany shook her head, being slightly dazed from the impact. When her vision started to focus she found Matt out cold on the ground by the mystery man's feet. "That'll teach the bitch." She watched as his eyes moved from Matt to her before he came over and helped her up for the second time today. "Are you okay?'

"I'm fine." She said, looking back down at an unconscious Matt. "Asshole."

"No kidding." the guy said with a laugh. "Come on, let's go outside for a bit. I think you need a break."

She giggled and followed him outside where they sat on a bench beside the doors to the school gym. Brittany's eyes didn't leave him for a second. Who was this guy and why was he being so nice to her? He had come over to her, comforted her, danced with her, and even knocked out her date when he put his hands on her. "Who are you?"

"That depends on who you're asking."

She gave him a playfully annoyed look. "What's your name?"

He laughed a bit before holding out his hand to her. "Ryan."

She shook his hand. Ryan, that name sounded familiar. "Wait, aren't you the guy who was accused for wanting to blow up the school."

"Yep, had my house searched and everything." He said with a grin. "If I'm remembering correctly, you were one of the accusers."

Her eyes widened at this. She had accused him of this because one of her friends brought it up and she was simply following the group. "I'm so sorry, I didn't mean to-"

He held a hand up, stopping her in her tracks. "Don't worry about it. We all make mistakes."

She felt an odd wave of relief wash over her when he said this. "I'm Brittany by the way."

"Nice to meet you."

Seven fifty, Luna noted as Night Court was brought to an end. As expected, barely anypony showed up, allowing her to close down for the night. Then tomorrow, a whole day off, well, unless an emergency where to come up. For the time being though, she could finally go and spend time with Ryan.

She had been looking forward to this all night; going out and socializing while being by his side. She truly did care deeply for him and that showed, earning her a bit of teasing from her sister. She didn't let it bother her though. The whole reason Ryan was brought here was because the portal said that they were the perfect match. Despite their differences here and there, they truly were in her eyes.

As she made her way to the club she could hear Ryan's voice echoing through the halls. This confused her a bit, until she entered that is. There he was, standing on stage, his body covered in glow sticks for some reason, and holding the microphone to his mouth.

"Ladies and Gentlcolts, my name is Ryan Curtis and I've got a little something for you tonight!" The crowd cheered at his announcement. "Now, back in my world, I was a bit of a man-whore." Luna smiled as the crowd let out light chuckle at his words. "Not gonna lie to you, I was." He continued, smiling as he did so. "So a friend of mine showed me this song and it was considered my theme song for about three years now. Let's do it."

Time to show these ponies what real music is!

A light rock and roll tune picked up as he cleared his throat. Luna couldn't help but smirk and lean against the wall. Rather curious as to what he was going to sing.

"~You'll never meet my mom, strings will never be attached.
We'll always get along, cause it doesn't have to last.
And anytime I call, you don't have to call me back.
I'm never gonna fall, but I'm never hard to catch!
She says she's cool with it, she's down with it.
There's nothing wrong with it, cause it's easier this way.
She's so cool with it, she's down with it.
There's nothing wrong with it, don't want it any other way!"

The music suddenly picked up as he moved on to the chorus. This made everypony in the crowd start cheering dancing around like maniacs, basking in this new song from another world.

"~It's just your typical, hardcore, casual sex!
We're single but we're lovers, crazy for each other.
Just your typical, hardcore, casual sex!
We're wild under the covers, crazy for each other!"

Luna mouthed the word 'Wow; to herself. He really wasn't that bad of a singer, but more importantly, this was the song that his friends thought suited him? Did that mean that had allot of experience. She was starting to become a bit self-conscious now. With how he was displaying himself he clearly has a history and she was still a virgin.

"~We don't have to go on dates, you don't have to like my friends.
I won't get in your face when you're making other plans.
If you're tired of the taste, you can try another blend.
My heart will never break, I'm just here to break a sweat."

"~That's why she's cool with it, she's down with it.
There's nothing wrong with it, cause it's easier this way.
She's so cool with it, she's down with it.
There's nothing wrong with it, don't want it any other way!"

The song was rather catchy, but Luna's attention was soon draw to something on the other side of the room. She could see a dark figure lurking around near the back of the crowd. With her curiosity nagging her, she began walking toward it.

"~It's just your typical, hardcore, casual sex!
We're single but we're lovers, crazy for each other.
Just your typical, hardcore, casual sex!
We're wild under the covers, crazy for each other!"

As she got closer to the figure she could see that it was clearly not a pony...but what was it?

"~She's so cool with it, she's down with it
There's nothing wrong with it, cause it's easier this way.
She's so cool with it, she's down with it.
There's nothing wrong with it, don't want it any other way!"

The figure suddenly pulled out a small handheld device, it looked similar to the one Ryan kept on him. He would refuse to go anywhere without it. Just as she was about to address the creature, it aimed the device toward the stage.

"~It's just your typical-" The music was cut off as a loud bang echoed through the room, startling everypony, especially the DJ. No pony recognized the sound, but Ryan did, he even felt a growing pain in his chest. He looked down to see a small wave of blood pouring through his shirt from his rib cage. "Fuck..." He said as his body collapsed to the stage floor.

The ponies all saw this and exited, running and screaming. Doing their best to avoid whatever it was that may have attacked the human. Once they were all gone, only three remained; Ryan, who's body now laid lifelessly on the stage floor with a pool of warm red liquid forming beneath him. Luna, who stared in shock at him. And Brittany, who placed her gun back into its holster, not even noticing Luna.

Luna teleported over to Ryan's side and flipped him over, shaking his body. "Ryan? Ryan!" She tore open his shirt and looked over the wound, using her magic to pull out a small metal object that had punctured his skin and dove into his body. "Please, please! Wake up!" She looked up to see the dark figure from earlier attempting to leave, but closed the door and sealed it with her magic.

Brittany stepped back, startled from the sudden life that had been given to the door. She looked over to see the night princess standing straight and tall over Ryan's body. Her horn and eyes were shinning brightly, as were the tears streaming down her face as she stared her down.

"What did you do!?" Screamed the extremely pissed off alicorn in her Canterlot voice. This caused Brittany to recoil a few steps backward. She could feel the sheer force of just her yelling hitting her like a train.

Luna was charging up her magic for a massive blow, but Brittany quickly drew her gun again. Three more bangs echoed through the room before the uniformed human's body fell to the floor.

The mare, shocked at this development, looked down to face the source of the banging.

Ryan laid on his side, one hand over his wound while the other was stretched over his head, holding a device similar to the one the woman had reached for.

Luna lowered herself back down to Ryan with tears still in her eyes, but the glow slowly subsiding. "Ryan!" She shouted, sitting him up and pulling him into a tight hug. "I thought I had lost you..."

"You're not getting rid of me that easily..." He weakly stated, chuckling a bit as he did so. He dropped his gun and joined Luna in the embrace. He was happy he was alive, but more importantly, he was happy he was able to protect Luna and wouldn't be leaving her on this night.

"Can you Identify her?" The nurse asked, unzipping the body bag.

Ryan stood by Luna's side, his wound had been healed earlier that day with the help of his wonderful marefirend's alicorn powers and he couldn't be in better condition. "Her name's Brittany." He said. "She's from my world."

The nurse nodded before zipping up the bag and pushing it away. The couple looked at each other; Luna giving Ryan a very curious look. "This was the woman that tried to arrest you back in your world, right?" He nodded. "Why did she try to kill you?"

He thought back to a time he had nearly forgotten about, the day he and Brittany had broken up.

Ryan stormed out of the house with Brittany following close behind. They had been dating for several months and it was becoming too much on him. For a long time he had had problems with staying in a committed relationship, he would find himself becoming irritable and aggressive over the littlest things with his partners. He just needed to get away from her for a bit, have his space to work this all out on his own. She wasn't allowing this.

Brittany ran up behind him, grabbing him by the arm to stop him from going any further. "Ryan, talk to me! We can work this out. Let me help you."

"There's nothing to work out!' He snapped at her, pulling his arm from her grip. "You can't help me, just leave me alone!" He didn't want to yell at her, he didn't want to hurt her, but right now that was the only thing on his mind. He had to leave before he could do something he would regret.

She just stared at him with watery eyes. She wanted to do something, anything to make him feel better. He had told her when they first started going out that a time like this would come and he would need some space to figure it out, but she had convinced herself that she could help him. "I can help you! I know I can, but you have to let me in!"

"Fuck you! Stay away from me." He tried to walk away again, only for her to wrap her arms around him from behind.

"Please, Ryan...I don't wanna lose you." She pleaded, soaking the back of his shirt with her tears.

Finish what you started!

Ryan couldn't help himself, he didn't want to leave her, but that's what it was coming to. He growled as he reached down and grabbed her hands, pulling them off of him as he shoved her away. "What part off 'fuck off' did you not understand!? I don't want anything to do with you anymore! You can die in a fucking hole for all I care!" He turned around and took off running, leaving a teary eyed Brittany standing in the middle of the road by herself.

"Ever since then she's been out to get me." He explained, now sitting on the edge of his bed. "She became a cop and started stalking me, looking for reasons to put me away." He paused and started rubbing the small hairs on his chin. "I don't know, I guess she just never let it go. She relied on me for damn near everything and I just up and left for no reason."

Luna sat beside him, listening intently as he explained Brittany's hatred for him. "I can understand her being upset, but that shouldn't be enough to drive her to try and murder you."

"You'd be surprised." He started, "Human's are fucked up individuals. I've seen people being killed over something as simply as living space. We're a violent race and there just comes a point where something becomes too much and you snap. Plus, she was emotionally unstable and bipolar as hell."

"Okay, I can't say I agree with the solution though." Luna thought back to when she had almost taken over all of Equestria. Back when all she wanted was to take out her sister and make night time eternal. She had done it simply because she was jealous of the attention her sister was getting as well as the day time. She poured her heart and soul into making the nights as beautiful as they were and never got recognition, just as Brittany pulled her heart and soul into Ryan, only for him to leave her. "Then again, I can't really judge, can I?" She said with a light giggle. "But, I guess I can understand it on some level."

"I guess I can too. Hell, I'd probably kill for less." The two shared a short laugh.

Luna couldn't help but ponder what Ryan had spoken about earlier. "What you said; about having commitment issues and wanting to leave your partner. That's not going to happen with me, is it?"

He looked over at her, she could see it in his eyes. He was scared. "I hope not..."

Ryan just sat still, staying deep in thought as he reached up and rubbed the area he had recently been shot in. Luna gazed at him with concern. "Are you alright? It's not still hurting is it?"

He smiled a bit. "No, not at all. It's just that..." He paused again, looking for the right words as he let out a sigh. "Karma's a bitch."

Author's Note

A Night To Remember

It's a wonderful day in Canterlot. The air is clear, the sun is high and bright in the sky, and the two royal sisters are up and about performing their royal duties. Celestia, the great and powerful sun god, has yet to see Luna's mate up and moving. Thus, she decides to take it upon herself to see what is keeping him

She enters the human's chambers to find his form still in bed, laying face down with his head buried in pillows. She finds the sight rather funny. The mare walks over, gingerly placing a hand on his back and giving him a few gentle shoves. "Good morning, sunshine. It's time to wake up." She says with in a tone so warm it could melt even the coldest of hearts.

"Fuck. Off. Sunbutt."

Eat a dick, a big bag of dicks

Well, maybe not the coldest.

Celestia couldn't help but giggle at his behavior. She wasn't too fond of the nickname he had given her, but was getting used to it rather quickly. She gives him a couple more shoves. "Come on, it's a beautiful day out. You shouldn't stay in bed and miss out on it."

He groans slightly, clearly not being even the slightest bit willing to cooperate. "Fuck the sun and fuck you. Leave me alone."

Fine, if he was going to play this game she could play it right back. Her horn lights up as she grabs the blanket with her magic and pulls it off of the bed, tossing it onto the floor. "Now don't be so..." Her train of thought comes to a grinding halt as she looks down at his completely naked form. She instantly remembers the story Twilight had told her back when Ryan had fallen ill.

The sun goddess could do nothing but stare down at the human as he remained still in his bed. "I hope you like what you see, just remember though; That ass, your sister's tapping it."

You're an idiot.

Luna makes her way over to her mate's room. She noticed that she hadn't seen him at all this morning and was starting to worry. Her bond with him was enough to tell her that he was safe, but she couldn't help but get anxious when he wasn't around. When she makes it to the door and is about to turn the nob she hears something akin to a loud smack come from the inside of the room, which was quickly followed by a yelp.

Her ears fold back at this, she didn't know what to expect when she opened the door. What she found was her sister standing on one side of Ryan's bed, while Ryan himself was on the floor on the opposite side. He was completely naked and rolling around in, what looks like, pain. Her face turned a rather deep shade of red at this. "Sister...Ryan...what are you doing?"

Celestia looks over to her sister, but before she could answer, the human on the other side pipes up. "She smacked me on the ass!" The two sisters do there best to stifle a boisterous laughter. "You could have at least used the whip, that's what it's here for!"

They go silent, both turning a dark shade of crimson at his words. The same thought runs through their minds. Does he really have a whip...and what does he use it for? Better yet; what's he planning to use it for?

Ryan got up on to his feet, clearly not caring that he was standing completely nude in front of the two princesses. He positions his body so that he can look at his behind, quickly spotting a large red hand print where he had been struck.

Damn, that bitch can really leave a mark. I wonder how much practice it took to get that down.

Ryan's mouth immediately follows suit with his mind's thoughts. "Who's ass have you been smacking to-" He sees her face darken further. "You know what, I don't wanna know." He places a hand on his sore cheek and rubs it slightly. "Damn, never thought anything would match rubbing Bengay on my nuts."

Dude, it felt like our skin was melting off!

He shudders slightly at the thought. It was funny when his family and his friend did it, but when he tried it..."Never again."

Ryan walks over to his closet and pulls out a clean pair of clothes. The thought of rubbing sand paper across his phallus comes to mind. The pain it would cause, a slight burning sensation if some of it managed to enter through the tip.

Why are you thinking about this!? Stop!

Honestly, he had no idea why that thought came to mind. It just kind of did. It was weird. He wonders if maybe he has some weird fetish for pain. He's never been one for masochism, one incident almost led to him getting stabbed. She said she was missing intentionally, but he wasn't convinced. That bitch was the sole reason he no longer allowed knives on his bed.

...You...your thoughts are going a little bit of everywhere...You feeling alright?

Ryan shrugged, his mind has always been this way. It settled down a bit after he got here and met Luna, but after a while it returned back to its usual state. He wasn't complaining, he actually kind of missed the chaos. It's what made him one of the funniest people in his group of friends.

Once he is done getting dressed he turned around and watched as both princesses shoot their heads up towards the the cieling to make it look like they hadn't been watching him the whole time. "What the hell are you two still doing in here? Don't y'all got a country to run? Go on, git!" He says in his best southern accent.

The sisters nod and take off out the door. He really didn't mind Luna staying a bit longer, but Celestia had to go. He'd have asked for just Celestia to leave, but that would lead to a future of nonstop teasing, then him retorting, then her likely throwing him into a wall...again.

Ryan thought about getting breakfast, but eating shortly after waking up would upset his stomach in ways that shouldn't be possible. The last time he made that mistake had had to call his brother and ask him to retrieve a plumber, a plunger, a priest, and a rabbi; no questions asked!

I still blame the soy sauce.

The day went on rather peacefully, which actually sucked. Nothing ever happened here! He would hear about this place called Ponyville which would receive all kinds of action; Timber wolves, manticores, a big ugly fuck named Tirek. He was missing out being here! So, who better to visit than the master of chaos himself.

Ryan found the door he was looking for and pounds on it three times. He could hear music on the other side before a voice spoke up over the volume of the beat. "Come in!~" The voice almost sang.

He opened the door to find Discord sitting at a small table with his feet resting on it, the song still playing as he entered.

"Discord! I'm howling at the moon

and sleeping in the middle of a summer afternoon.

Discord! What ever did we do,

to make you take our world away?"

"What the hell are you listening to?" Ryan asked before the music finally cut off.

"Oh, it's nothing. Just a little song I found while playing around in a few different dimensions." Discord lowers his feet and straightens his posture. "So what brings you to my chambers; back for a little more magic fiddling?" Just as he says that a fiddle appears in his hands and he plays a small tune.

When Ryan had first met Discord, they ran around playing all kinds of tricks with his magic. He could only assume that the whole fiddle thing was a play on words and he's just having fun with it. "Actually, I was just bored out of my mind. Luna's busy working, so I really have nothing to do."

"Well, I could think of a few things." Discord snaps his fingers. The fiddle vanishes and an array of fancy looking glass bottles filled with different shades of liquid appear on the table. "How about a friendly drinking game, I know how long it's been since you've had a hard drink and I can tell you're practically itching for one."

This guy can read us like a book...I DON'T LIKE IT!!!

Despite how weird it was that Discord knew Ryan was a drinker without him ever bringing it up, he was right. Since he had come here he hadn't had a solid drink. He even made a few attempts at sneaking into the kitchen to find something fun. There was a bar at the club, but they wouldn't serve to him because he was under twenty-one. Damn age restrictions laws existed here too!

Yes, the times here are different, which is why the bar tender, while looking at his license, asked what year it was back in his world.

You could have just lied!

Ryan mentally smacked himself for not thinking of that, but then again he didn't know if the laws here were different. Fuck it, he's wasted too much time dwelling on the thought. He walked over and took a seat on the opposite side of the table. "Sounds like fun. Let's get started."

Unbeknownst to the human, Discord only drinks for fun. However, he was completely immune to alcohol's effects. Basically meaning he could down a barrel full of vodka and not even be the slightest bit tipsy. He was doing this for fun, to see how the human would react. One thing was for sure in the god of chaos' mind; this was going to be an interesting day.

Seeing how nothing ever really happened at Night Court, Luna and Celestia agreed to work together and just have a Day Court in which both princesses were present. It definitely made the work allot less taxing on Celestia and she was happy to have more time with her sister in the process. Between cases they would talk about whatever came to their minds and even discuss Luna's relationship.

The Court was finally coming to an end, allowing the sisters to finish up some of the paperwork they had received while Celestia continues to tease Luna about her new relationship.

Celestia raised her brow at her younger sister, wearing a rather annoying smile on her muzzle. "So, just how intimate have you two gotten since being together?"

"Tia!" Luna shouted, slightly embarrassed at the question. "Ryan and I have done nothing of the sort. Regardless, I don't see how it's any of your business."

She laughed at her sister's response. She was simply too easy to provoke and she found it absolutely adorable. "Really? That's not what I saw last time you were in heat."

Luna buried her face in her hands, her face flushed a bright shade of red. Maybe combining their court sessions wasn't such a good idea. "That was different. I had no control over myself. It was your fault anyway, you should have told him!"

She was right about that, she should have told him. In all honesty though, it was a complete misunderstanding. Ryan had told her that the women where he came from went through something similar and seemed like he knew how to handle it. Turns out humans go through something completely different. However, she wasn't going to let her sister win this argument. "Maybe I wanted him to go in there; maybe I thought it would be funny to watch him-"

For the second time today, her words were cut off. Once again, it was by the human, Ryan. They watched as he stumbled into the throne room, moving around like he had just gotten off a carnival ride. You know, like that one that they strap you in and it spins around and around...and around...and around...oi.

Ryan struggled to make his way over to the princesses, taking each step as carefully as he could. Once he had finally made it to the halfway point, his right leg stuck out and he stopped completely. After a moment of silenced the weight of his leg brought him forward and he collapsed to the ground.

Celestia and Luna rose from their seats and ran over to aid him. Luna sat down behind the human, gabbing his arms and pulling him up, making him sit up on his knees. Celestia lowered herself as well, only she was directly in front of him.

The sun god's eyes scanned his features. His eye lids seemed to be heavy, his body was leaning every which direction, and his breath...Her expression went from one of concern to slight annoyance. "He's been drinking."

Luna turned her head to the intoxicated human, she figured out real quick that he sister was right. "Oh my gosh." She spoke in an annoyed fashion. "Where did he even get it?"

Discord hid in the shadows, his hands placed firmly over his mouth so no one would hear him laughing.

Ryan leaned closer to Celestia, causing her eyes to widen a bit. She had no idea how humans reacted to alcohol. Should she be worried, scared, would he-"You have really big boobs..."

Celestia's face went completely blank. A light blush quickly spread across her muzzle. Luna was almost in tears she was laughing so hard. Before Celestia could say anything, she felt something poking one of her breasts. She looked down to see that Ryan was sticking out two fingers and simply pushing them into the soft flesh.

"They're like balloons." He said with a fascinated tone. "Like, if you took a regular balloon and filled it with warm water." He stopped for a minute, letting that word run around in his head. "Balloons...ballllooooooons..." He started snickering at the word.

Luna had completely busted out in guffaw, to the point that she actually let go of Ryan and started rolling around on the floor. "Oh gosh, ahahahaha, I can't breath!"

Ryan used everything in his power to stay in a somewhat upright position, but it wasn't enough. He fell forward, his face burying itself directly into Celestia's bosom before letting out a satisfied hum.

Mmm. Silky, warm balloons.

Celestia's face only grew redder before grabbing Ryan's shoulders and pushing him back into a sitting position. "Luna, I believe your mate is in need of some rest."

"Holy shit, you're alive!?" Ryan shouted in genuine surprise, staring directly at Celestia.

"Of course I'm alive! Why wouldn't I be?"

"I don't know, you weren't moving. I thought you were a statue." He looked back down at her breasts and began poking one of them again. "A very squishy statue."

Luna finally managed to catch her breath and grabbed Ryan, picking him up and holding him like one would a child. "Okay, lover-boy. I think it's time for bed."

He put one of his arms over Luna's shoulder and leaned into her. "I want a panda hat for Christmas, Santa."

The night princess rolled her eyes, still wearing an amused smile on her face before walking out of the throne room.

Don't forget the hat!

"Wait, my panda hat!"

"You don't have panda hat." Luna said with a light chuckle.

Ryan thought about it for a minute, then the realization dawned on him. "Oh yeah..."

Once the two had left Celestia stayed completely still on the ground, taking in everything that had just happened. A minute had passed and she buried her face into her hands. "Dammit, why does he have to be so cute!"

Luna carried Ryan down hallway after hallway, her alicorn strength being more than enough to hold him for an extended period of time. On the way she happened to bump into Twilight, who seemed rather curious about the predicament.

"He did what to Celestia!?" She nearly screamed as Luna finished the story.

Luna started laughing again, tightening her grip on the human so she wouldn't accidentally drop him. "H-he kept comparing her bosom to over-sized water balloons the whole time too!"

Ryan looked over at the young alicorn. She appeared to be in some weird state of shock. He had to do something quick to calm her down. It was his duty as the royal jester!

We took an oath!

He reached out, grabbing Twilight's head in both of his hands and shaking her slightly. "Calm down, Twinkle! It's going to be okay." He stopped shaking her and the two shared eye contact for about five seconds before all thoughts in his head shut down and moved on to a new subject. His gaze shifted upward to her horn. "What it with these things?" He asked, reaching up with one hand and poking the appendage.

Luna watched as he did this, a unicorn's horn was an extremely sensitive spot. Part of her wanted to make him stop immediately, while another was curious to see what he was going to do.

Twilight knew she couldn't react the way she should about her horn being touched, he was human, he didn't know any better. She would have to explain it to him. "You really shouldn't-"

"Are they flavored?"

"What!? No they're not-"

Before she could continue, Ryan pulled her head closer and licked from the base of her horn all the way to the tip, elciting a loud moan from Twilight.

Luna's first thought was 'Holy shit! No wonder his tongue was so good. That thing goes past his chin!' Her second thought was, 'Oh fuck, he's violating Twilight!'. She pulled him back just enough to free the young alicorn from his assault.

Twilight's entire body was frozen and her face was a deep red color. "I-uh...I need to go to my room now." With a bright flash of her horn she was gone.

Ryan looked around frantically, wondering where she had gone. "Wait, I wasn't done yet! Dammit, I wanted to get to the tootsie roll in the center."

They made it back to the room, finally! Aside from fondling her sister and molesting Twilight, it wasn't that bad. Ryan was a goofy and adorable drunk. Maybe she should let him drink more often. Then again, that could also lead to him doing something really stupid, so she would have to keep him under her constant supervision.

Luna carried him over to the bed, setting him down gently as to not make him too uncomfortable, despite how much he might actually deserve it.

"Hey, can we go out for tacos? I miss meat. I want a cheese burger." This slightly disturbed Luna, as her species was herbivore by nature. Does he actually eat meat, or is he just being weird? She would have to ask him at some point. If he did then why didn't he bring it up sooner?

She was about to leave shortly after levitating his blanket over him, but was stopped when she felt a tugging on the waistband of her shorts.

"Nuuu, come back." He adorably pleaded, making her giggle slightly.

"Sorry, dear, but I still have a bit of work to do. So if you don't mind I-" She yelped as the tug became a full on pull, causing her to stumble and fall into the bed.

Ryan threw an arm around her and held on tight, refusing to let her go. Cuddles were going to happen, even if they had to be forced.

I like snuggling.

Luna tried to get up, but the intoxicated human seemed to have some sort of hidden strength. He wasn't going to budge. She sighed, maybe taking a slight break from work wouldn't be too bad. Besides, it felt nice being wrapped in his arms. He may be slightly shorter than her, but he played big spoon pretty well. His body was warm, his arms were soft...

Before she could continue her thought Ryan pulled himself up and laid his body down on top of Luna, resting his chin on her chest as he looked up at her. "What are you doing?" She asked, seeming slightly worried.

Ryan opened his mouth to speak, but stopped. He looked like he was thinking really hard to try and find an answer. "That...is a very good question." He looked around at where he was and what position he was in. "How did I get up here?"

Luna laughed again, he really was too cute sometimes. When she stopped laughing she saw him staring up at her horn. 'Uh oh' she thought as one of his hands reached up and gripped the appendage. She let out a muffled moan as he did this. "Seriously, Ryan...What are you doing?"

He ran his hand up and down her horn, letting his thumb run circles over the odd ridges as he did so to get a better feel of the texture. It was hard, but also very smooth. Like there was a layer of silk-like skin over it. "How is a thing that exists? It's so weird!" He pulled the horn closer to him, making Luna's head raise from the bed.

He continued to examine it while his hand explored it up and down. Luna was gasping repeatedly for some reason, but he was too distracted to find out why. Curiosity took over again; He didn't get a strong flavor off of Twilight's horn, maybe his did it wrong. He stuck his tongue out and dragged it up Luna's horn, placing the tip in his mouth this time to see if he could get a better taste from it.

They're flavored, I know they are! Don't stop until we find out what it is!

He continued to run his hand along her horn, not even realizing he was still doing it. He kept the tip in his mouth and ran circles over it with his tongue.

Luna was in a complete state of pleasure. She wanted to make him stop at first, but something inside of her wasn't going to allow it. No pony had ever done anything like this to her, so the feeling was completely new, but she was loving every second of it. She reached her arms up and wrapped them around Ryan, digging her fingers into his back.

He could feel her nails digging slightly into his skin. It kind of hurt. Why was she trying to hurt him? He was just studying her, he doesn't know about these pony's weird biology. So why is she doing this? Regardless, he wasn't going to let her get away with it, he just needed to figure out how to get back at her.

Bite that bitch!

That would work! He wouldn't be able to do it too hard due to a lack of feeling in his jaw. That was probably because of the fall he took back in the throne room. He did land pretty hard. Ryan wasn't going to let it stop him though; so he brought his front teeth down on Luna's horn.

This completely sent Luna over the edge. She screamed as her horn began to shoot small bursts of magic into his mouth. Once it had stopped her head dropped back down to the bed, finally being released from the oral prison.

Ryan was in a slight state of shock at what had just happened and let go of Luna, letting her fall back onto the bed. He didn't get any sort of flavor from the horn, but his mouth did feel a bit tingly. It was hard to explain, especially in his drunken stupor.

The release of her horn left her in a state of euphoria, but there were other things calling to her attention. She could feel a certain aching between her thighs, as well as a growing wet spot in her shorts. If he was going to play around with her body, then it's only fair that she gets to play around with his.

Once this thought entered her mind, Luna found herself filled with a sudden burst of energy and vigor. She pushed Ryan off of her and to the side, before he could react she straddled him and forced her lips against his.

Ryan wasn't complaining in any way, he always enjoyed their embraces, especially this one. As they continued their agreesive make out session, the human could feel something odd going on down by his waist. He broke the kiss and looked down to see his lower half covered in an odd blue glow.

His belt came undone and his pants were forced off of him, soon after his shirt was pulled off as well. "Hey, I need those." He said lazily and with a slight lisp, his TH's sounding more like a D. He looked up to see the mare on top of him pulling off her shirt.

Once Luna's shirt was gone she leaned down for another kiss, pressing her tongue against his lips, practically begging for entry. She was much more forceful when he allowed her in, letting their tongues battle for dominance. She raised her lower body, using her magic to slide her shorts off of her.

One of her hands worked its way down his chest to his groin. She quickly took noticed of the still flaccid member between his legs. At fist she felt a little insulted, then she remembered that he had been drinking, whiskey-dick is a thing. Granted she only heard about it after visiting the club and talking to a group of mares, but at least she knew it wasn't because he didn't find her attractive.

Never-the-less, this was a problem that could be easily fixed. She used her magic to envelop his cock in a blue glow, filling it with what could only be describe as a magical aphrodisiac. His member soon began to elongate and harden until it looked as if it was about to burst.

Luna grabbed Ryan's arms and pinned them above his head as she positioned her moist entrance above his throbbing rod. She broke the kiss and stared at him with a dominant look, her eyes were hungry and full of lust.

Ryan, still in his stupid drunk state, was confused and slightly terrified by this. "Brain...what's happening?" He whispered not too quietly. Luna giggled at him again before lowering herself slightly, allowing the head of his cock to enter her.

RAPE!!!

He started wiggling around beneath her, trying to break free from her grip. Luna saw this as him playing along and simply wanting more. With this in mind she let her body drop down, taking in his full length. Her eyes shot wide open as she gasped at the foreign appendage now inside of her body. She never imagined it would feel anything like this. It was warm, hot even. She could feel his heartbeat pulsing through his member and into her.

Her eyes wandered down to Ryan. He was completely frozen still; He looked like he could have just up and died at that moment. Worry started to fill her. "Ryan?"

...ohhhhh fuck.

Suddenly Luna felt a powerful thrust come from Ryan. Her arms went weak as she moaned into the air. The human freed himself from her grip before grabbing her shoulders and forcing them to roll over.

Ryan pinned Luna down beneath him and started pulling out of her moist slit. She looked almost disappointed, like the thing that had given her pleasure just moments ago was going to leave and never come back. Much to her surprise though, Ryan thrust hard back into her tight caverns, hilting himself within her. Luna released an almost primal moan as his length was shoved into her.

Biting her lip, she looked up at Ryan who began thrusting in and out of her at an aggressive pace. Luna let out a series of soft moans every time he would force his way back into her. The human released her arms and began roughly playing with her breasts, pinching her nipples between his knuckles.

Luna never pictured her first time being so rough, but at this point she didn't care. She was loving every second of this and wanted more. Her wish was soon granted as Ryan released her breasts and lowers himself down closer to her. His thrusts had slowed down, but they didn't lighten up in the slightest. With his face closer to hers he prompted for a quick kiss before lowering his head and biting down on a particularly sensitive spot on Luna's neck that she didn't know she had. "Oh fuck, yes!" She cried.

Ryan had enough experience in his world. Twenty-eight relationships failed and gone down the drain. Tell you what though, none of them came from problems in the bedroom. He wasn't as big as some of his friends, especially Alex. They called him Godzilla for a reason. But, he has slept with a couple of the girls that Alex had, and they openly admitted to Ryan being much better. He knew how to use what he had, and he had teased enough women to know every sensitive spot in the book. As this one shows, ponies have them as well, he would just have to be a little bit more rough with them.

Granted, in his current mental state, everything he was doing was based purely on instinct. Either way, Luna couldn't get enough of it. The mare below was doing everything in her power to force him as deep into her as he could go.

Again, instinctively, he knew what needed to be done. Much to Luna's disappointment he pulled out of her before flipping her body so she would be laying face down on the bed. "Is something wrong? Why did you-ahh!" Luna soon found that blissful filling feeling return to her as Ryan hilted himself back within her passage, this time deeper. "Please, keep going!"

He ran his fingers down her toned back, teasing her and making her body shudder before finally resting his hands on her soft round flank and continuing his work on her. He always preferred this position. Not only did it allow you to go deeper, which is great for both parties, but he loved the this kind of physical contact. The feeling of the soft flesh of her ass pressing up against his waist, it was amazing before, but Luna's smooth fur was making him love it even more.

"R-Ryan..." She managed to say between moans. "I-I feel...something's gonna-" She didn't know how to describe it, this growing feeling inside of her. Like something was building up and begging to be released. Ryan continued thrusting into her, making the feeling even stronger until finally she felt something else entirely. He body released a wave of fluids onto her mate's cock as she screamed into the heavens. There it was, the blissful release that had been clawing at her for so long.

Ryan wasn't too far behind, but the feeling of Luna's release along with the tightening of her walls that pulled him deeper into her coaxed it out of him. He leaned over her form, hilting himself inside of her as he felt his climax hit hard, releasing wave after wave of his baby gravy into her caverns.

Luna could feel a warm fluid filling her insides, a clear indication that her mate had hit his end as well.

The two collapsed and the human's now softening member worked it's way out of her before he rolled off to the side. They looked over at each other with exhausted smiles on their faces.

Luna crawled over to Ryan with her arm, as her legs felt like jello at the moment, and curled up against him, wrapping one of her arms around his stomach while her head rested on his chest. "That was...wonderful..." Her eyes started to close, she couldn't believe that she had gotten so tired. In a matter of seconds, she was out like a light.

After catching his breath, Ryan looked around the room. He was still a bit out of it from hanging out with Discord earlier, but he wasn't tired. He looked down at Luna's peacefully sleeping form, then his eyes became set on her horn.

Dinosaurs goes omnomnomnom

He stared at it for another few seconds before placing the tip in his mouth again. "Nom"

Luna gasped as she woke up.

Author's Note

An extra long, very fun chapter to make up for my absence. I hope you all enjoyed. Feel free to let me know how this came out as this was the first ever sex scene I have ever written in the history of ever.

Please Don't Leave

"God damn sun..."

Ryan's eyes felt like they were melting out of his skull as the sun's rays worked there way through his window and onto his face. It seemed much brighter than usual. Not only that, but he felt kind of dizzy. He moved to get up, but something was stopping him. He felt a strange texture going across his chest and holding him down with the strength of a bull. Oh well, might as well see how everything's going. "Brain, status report."

Fuck off, Todd.

"...What?"

He must have gotten really fucked up if his brain is this fuzzy. Fuck it, shit happens. He looked down and grunted in pain. Whatever was holding him down just stabbed him in the eye! "Mother...ffffffuck!" He quickly placed a hand over his eye, pulling it away just as fast. "No blood. No damage done."

He looked down once again, this time being more careful. Much to his surprise, there wasn't a leprechaun sitting on his chest with a small sword. Instead he was met with this; A blue horn pointing directly at him, which seemed to be connected to a blue head with a flowing mane that-"Luna!?"

The night princess was stirred from her sleep. Who was yelling her name? It didn't matter, she just had the most wonderful night with her mate, nothing would spoil her mood today. He sat up, letting the blanket fall from her chest as she stretched out her arms and let out an adorable yawn. Last night was perfect, she made love to her mate and in so many different ways. They went hard and rough, then soft and loving, and would continue to switch off every so often.

She turned her head to see Ryan pulling himself into a sitting position. She smiled and leaned against him, wrapping her arms around his torso. "Good morning, love. Did you sleep well?"

He didn't reply, he just continued staring at her.

His silence prompted her to release him from her hold and look directly at him. "Is there something wrong?" She asked with genuine curiosity. Why was he acting so weird, they should feel closer than ever right now.

"Yes, no, I don't know!" He placed his hands on his head, trying to figure out what had happened. Part of him was panicking a bit. He had to piece together what had happened. He walked around, got bored, went to see Discord, started drinking, then...blank. "Fuck!" He removed his hands from his skull and began slamming one of his fists into his forehead. "Work, dammit, work!"

Luna was taken back by his sudden behavior. She reached up and grabbed his arm to stop him from further harming himself. "Ryan, stop!"

He pulled away and climbed out of the bed. "No, no, no. I have to remember." He went to a nearby wall and began headbutting it repeatedly. "Wake up, you useless fuck!"

Her mind only clicked on one thing at this moment. "You don't remember..." Her eyes began to water and a single tear worked its way down her face. In her mind, what she had just heard, was that her first time was nothing more than a forgotten memory to him.

Ryan hit his head harder, he knew what had happened just by how they woke up together, but he desperately wanted to remember everything. One more solid hit and the wall cracked. This one made him dizzy and he stumbled backward, falling onto the floor.

Alright! Fuck! I'm up!

At that moment everything that had happened last night came back to him. Discord winning the drinking competition due to biology.

And cheating!

Fondling Celestia and burying his face into her chest.

That was funny.

Licking Twilight's horn.

...I'm not sure if I can call that gay or not.

What happened between him and Luna.

Twelve rounds!? Damn, that's a new record!

With his brain awake and his memories retrieved, he turned around to talk to Luna, only she wasn't there.

This can't be good...

"No shit!" He didn't see her leave, that can only mean she teleported. Her clothes are on the ground, so she's naked. She must have gone to her room. Not like royalty is just going to up and strut around nude. He made a quick break for the door.

Clothes!

He stopped and turned around to get dressed, throwing on what he had worn last night before charging into the hall and toward Luna's room.

She couldn't believe it. She lost her virginity to the most wonderful creature she had ever met and he just completely forgot everything! She wanted so much to just be mad, but she couldn't. She was hurt.

Luna kept her face buried in her pillow as she wept. How could he be so thoughtless as to just forget their first time together. Last night was the night that they finally had done it. Not just sex, but the connection they made that night completed their bond. They were bound for life now and he doesn't even remember.

Three hard knocks came from her door. She knew who it was, he always knocked three times and it always sounded like he was pounding on the door rather than knocking. "Go away!"

"Luna, please. I just wanna talk." Ryan pleaded on the other side.

"There's nothing to talk about. I gave myself to you and you just forgot! I'm like one of your stupid ex's to you!"

"No you're not, just let me explain!"

"Leave me alone!"

Ryan was known for allot of things, being forgetful, being kind in a very crude and sometimes mean manner. One of the main things he was known for was his temper and how strong it made him. He was doing his best to stay calm, but something was tearing his insides apart. He could feel how hurt she was, but that pain was quickly turned into rage. He stepped away from the door before delivering a powerful kick. One strong enough to break the door off of its hinges.

Luna gasped and looked up at the enraged human, ready to attack if need be. Strangely enough, once he saw her, his anger started to dissipate. It was a shock to both of them. Her; because anger like that doesn't just simply melt away, him; because never before has anything ever managed to make it do so.

"Look, I just need one minute. Just give me that, please." He begged, mentally debating whether or not he should get down on his knees to make this more convincing.

She sat up on her bed, using her blankets to cover her still naked form. Her eyes were still wet with tears, but the look on her face was more stern than saddened. "You have one minute. You better make it count."

He walked over and took a seat on the bed, taking a deep breath. He was happy she would hear him out. As long as he could try to help her understand then he can say that he at least tried. "I'm sorry, Luna. I was drinking and every time I do I wake up the next morning not remembering anything for a little bit. It takes me a minute to get my brain working right so I can recollect everything."

Ryan looked over at Luna, she was still pretty pissed. That much he can tell for sure. He reached over and grabbed her hand, she tried to pull away, but he refused to let go.

"I'm really fucking sorry. Yes, I forgot." He watched her expression only turn more sour. He let go of her hand and rose from the bed. "But, if it's any consolation, I remember it now. And I don't regret a damn thing." With that he began walking toward the now broken entry way only to be stopped at the last second.

"Wait!" Luna called out, quickly earning the human's attention. "So, you do remember it?" She asked, her eyes almost pleading with him to give her the answer she wanted.

He nodded. "I don't remember it. I remember everything. Every last little detail." He chuckled slightly. "It's funny. The only time I can remember anything in perfect detail is when I'm drinking, but like I said, it takes me a minute."

Luna leaned back against her bedpost, her stern look now looking somewhat playful. "Oh yeah? Prove it." She demanded, now sounding much more upbeat.

"...What?"

"You heard me." Her magic suddenly engulfed the broken door, repairing and reattaching it back to its frame.

Ryan watched this in awe. "The fuck?"

"You say you remember, so prove it." Luna tossed the blanket aside, revealing her naked form to him. "I want you to show me every little trick you did last night, right now."

The human was practically frozen solid. He could not believe that she really just said that. And how the fuck did she go from pissed off and crying to ready to fuck in the blink of an eye?

Bitch is bipolar.

"Uh huh..." Even he didn't know who he was replying to; his mind, or the extremely hot alicorn sitting not ten feet away from him.

"Ryan~" She sang in a voice so sultry it would make a priest weak at the knees while fluttering her eyelashes at him. "I'm waiting."

He was about ready to tear his clothes off and jump this mare, but was stopped when he heard a soft knocking coming from Luna's door. He turned to face the door, "Luna is-uh no es home. No hablo Inglés. Check is in mail."

Did you really just do your Consuela voice?

"Um...Auntie Luna? Are you in there?" The voice replied in a smooth, but confused fashion.

Luna shot up from her bed, quickly throwing on a pair of clothes before answering the door. "Niece! It's so good to see you." She wrapped her arms around this...wow this bitch is cute.

On the other side of Luna's embrace was a woman just a bit shorter than Luna. Her fur was pink, her mane was...weird to look at. Not as bad a Celestia though. She had wings and a horn, so she's clearly an alicorn. The purple tips on her wings look pretty cool. She wore a colorful, but mostly pink, regal dress. So he knows what she looks like now, but who is she?

Ryan walked up behind Luna and soon found himself staring directly into the mare's purple eyes. They bore directly into his skull, it felt like she was looking inside of him. He threw his hands over his eyes and yelled before falling to the floor. "Back demon!"

Luna pulled away from the mare to see what all of the commotion was about. She shrugged it off rather quickly as Ryan just being weird. "Ryan, this is my Niece, Princess Mi Amore Cadenza of the Crystal Empire. Cadence, this is my mate, Ryan."

Cadence made her way over to Ryan, extending a hand to help him up. "Pleased to meet you." She said with a warm, welcoming smile. She's clearly being nice, she looks nice, and she has a loving aura of sorts that Ryan could definitely feel.

I don't buy it.

He squints his eyes at her, giving her a look that says 'I'm watching you' as he takes her hand and allows her to help him up. "Likewise."

Cadence could see that he doesn't trust her, honestly she's not sure if she should trust him either. Something about him seemed off. She could clearly see that he cared for Luna greatly when she was able to look into his eyes, but she could have sworn she found something else in them. Something not too charming.

"I hope you don't mind, but I would like to borrow my aunt for a short while."

He glared at her for a second before putting on a playful smile. "Sure, go right ahead. Take her off my hands for a bit." Right as he said this an empty glass flew off of a nearby table and into the side of his head. "Ow." He said sounding more un amused than anything else. He turned his head to face Luna who was looking at the ceiling and whistling. "Dick."

"Bitch." She replied with a smirk before walking over and kissing the side of his head. "You take care while I'm gone and don't get hurt,"

"I feel like the only time I get hurt is when I'm around you." They smiled to each other before sharing a tender kiss.

"Aww, you two are so cute." Cadence cut in, earning the couples attention. "Don't worry auntie, he'll be safe. Shining Armour will protect him."

"Shining who-now?" Ryan's question was soon answered as a white stallion with a blue mane dressed in shorts and a sports jersey walked in.

"So, this is the new guy, huh?' He walked over and threw and arm around Ryan. "It's about time we got another guy in the family. Come one, the hoofball tournament is about to start!"

There was a very distinct reason why Ryan has been with so many women. He grew up around damn near nothing but women, he had very few men in his life. In turn, he had a hard time communicating with guys. Not only that, he didn't like a lot of what a normal guy would do. One of those many things was sports. He'd rather do dishes that watch any kind of sport. He could tell real quick that he wasn't going to like Shining Armour.

Ryan leaned over to Luna and whispered, "You can't leave me with this guy, this is going to be a nightmare."

Luna just smiled and kissed him one last time. "You'll be fine dear. Go have fun."

As she said this Shining Armour started dragging Ryan out of the door. "Come on, we're gonna miss the first inning."

"No, No! You can't do this to me! Please...Luna, don't leave me!" Luna's bedroom door was shut as the two exited, Ryan soon being thrown over the stallions shoulder. "Dammit!"

Luna just laughed and took a seat on her bed. "And here I thought we were the ones who would be leaving. So, my dear niece, what brings you here? I haven't heard of any crisis that would demand all of us to be together."

Cadence nodded. "No, it's nothing like that. I just happened to hear from Twilight that you have yourself a coltfriend and-"

"She told you what he did to her last night, didn't she?"

The mare blushed a bit at this for some reason. "Well, yes. I was a bit concerned about his intentions. I just thought that maybe I should come see him for myself. Honestly, I'm not sure though."

Luna raised a brow at Cadence. "What do you mean?"

"It's just...He seems nice...kind of. " She did her best to choose her word carefully, she didn't want to upset her aunt, but she had to be honest. "I can tell his feelings for you are genuine, he really does care about you, but..."

"But..."

"There's something...in him. Something dark. I could see it, I could feel it. There's something...not right with him. Like he has something evil in him."

Luna sighed, "I'm well aware of that and I have done my best to keep him as he is."

"What do you mean?"

"I knew immediately when I met him that there was something lurking around in the depths of his mind." She explained, preparing to go into detail. "I had the opportunity to enter his mind a while ago, I found out things that would have taken me months to discover in a matter of minutes. He does harbor a darker being in him, it's a darker version of himself. Something terrible that seeks blood. I met with it personally."

Cadence sat down next to Luna, clearly intrigued by the story. "What happened?"

"I quelled the beast within him by showing it the beast within me. That was how our bond started. I connected with him, with all of him. The part of his mind that seeks order and fun, as well as the one that seeks chaos and death. I showed the beast within him Nightmare Moon and they were as enticed with each other as Ryan and I are. So long as I am around, the monster within him will remain calm."

"Wow." She didn't know what else to say. What else could be said? "I've heard the saying that love is when ones demons get along with anothers, but I never thought something like that could...wow." As interesting as the matter was, she did come here to talk about her sister in law and her safety. "So, about Twilight..."

Luna stood up and placed a hand on Cadence's shoulder. "Niece, I can assure you that it meant nothing. It was merely an act of drunken stupidity. He didn't know any better. I made sure to explain to him that night that what he did was wrong."

"So you told him about it?" She asks, giving Luna a knowing smirk.

Luna blushed, she could tell Cadence was onto her. "Well, yes of course I did."

"Really? Are you sure you didn't show him?" She teased.

"Y-you...I...Urg!" She had been defeated.

Cadence clapped her hands together, soon pointing at Luna. "Aha! I knew it. I could tell when I walked through the door!"

Luna rolled her eyes, "Oh, please. It's not that obvious."

"Not that obvious! You're practically glowing!" Luna continued to ignore her, "And you kind of really need a shower. You smell like you two went at it all night."

Luna's ears folded back, her blush quickly returning. She buried her face into her hands. "I wish Ryan and I could swap places right now..."

The music was loud, but the announcer was louder. Loud enough to be heard over the crowd of screaming fans. "An here's the pitch." The sound of the baseball meeting the bat echoed throughout the stadium. "And it's a high flyer! Look at it! It could go all the way...HOME RUN!!!"

The crowd went wild, Shining Armor jumped up, cheering like a madman. He came back down for a moment and shook Ryan's still sitting form, sharing the hype as best as he could before returning back to his standing position and cheering the runner on.

Ryan looked up at Shining Armour before burying his face into his hands. "Kill me now..."

Late Night Stories

Author's Note

Aren't I just the biggest tease ;P

Late Night Stories

"Alright, that's everything." Ryan said to no one in particular as he tossed his bag on the floor. It wasn't too far into the afternoon, so Luna was still in court with her sister. However, the night before, the couple discussed living arrangements. Despite him feeling like it was a bit early for them to be staying in the same room together, the idea didn't bother him all that much. After coming to an agreement with the night princess, he got to work; moving all of his stuff into Luna's room and reorganizing so everything would fit.

It wasn't exactly hard, Luna's room was much bigger than his. So much unnecessary space that wasn't even being used. It wasn't like he had much anyway, just a few clothes and utensils that came with him from his world, as well as clothing that was gifted to him by Celestia. In short, all he really did was move things around in a dresser.

After taking a seat on his new bed, that he would be sharing with his extremely hot girlfriend, he let thoughts of all kinds fill his head. Mostly how his nights were likely to end up being a lot more productive. Since they had first slept together, Luna seemed to grow much more open and willing to do things she would never have even considered.

There was even one point in time where they were eating dinner in the kitchen with Celestia; Luna had decided to sit next to Ryan. Once the food came out and they all began eating, the mare's hand slipped under the table and started making quick work of little Ryan under the table. She even dropped her fork just as he was about to finish so she could make sure he wouldn't make a mess.

This started a war of epic proportions between them. Before, it was constantly friendly bantering and insults, now it was a combination of that and whom could make the other squeal first.

Ryan's proudest moment of this war was one in which he sneaked into the office that Luna and Celestia started working in together. They would go in and take care of loads of paperwork for hours at a time. Little did Luna know that her mate had managed to slip in before they came along and was hiding under the desk where she sat.

That was fun; and the look on Celestia's face when you crawled out and walked away like nothing happened! Priceless!

It was a good day. Now, all he could do is kick back and wait for something to happen. His prayers were soon answered when a smiling dark blue mare bounced happily into the room, her smile only growing wider as she found her mate on the bed.

Luna leaped into the air, diving down on top of Ryan. The human yelped at the sudden impact and soon found himself being pinned beneath the beautiful mare. Before anything else could happen she planted a firm kiss on his lips, humming as she did so. As she broke it she lifted him up and hugged him. "I'm so happy to see you, love! How did the moving go?"

Is it just me or does she seem to be getting a bit clingy?"

"It was fine. It's not like a have a whole lot of stuff."

"Well, since you're going to be staying with me, feel free to add whatever you would like." She said with a smile, still hugging him tightly. "I missed you so much."

Ryan tried to pull away from her. It wasn't weird for her to be a little attached to him, in fact, not a day went by where he wasn't greeted by her hugging or kissing him at least five plus times. But this, this was new. She's never acted like this before. It was almost like she had to be near him to live, like she was thriving on his very presence, like she's-

Oh fuck...

He couldn't help but notice the feeling of her hand pressing against his inner thigh and traveling upward, getting closer and closer to his groin. Just as she was about to cup him a knock was heard at the door.

Luna growled, obviously being very displeased with the interruption. "I'm a little busy at the moment. Whatever it is, I'm sure it can wait."

"Sister," Celestia's voice called from behind the door, "I need to speak with Ryan. Is he in there?"

His eyes wandered to the mare holding him. He could tell she was about to say no, but there was no way in hell he was going to get caught in the middle of a flame war between the royal sisters. That would very likely end in allot of physical trauma for the poor human. "Yeah, I'm here! What's up?"

"Ryan, I need you to come out here for a moment."

"I'll be right out." He quickly pulled away from Luna, who was looking up at him with pleading eyes, and made his way out of the room. The door closed behind him, thanks to Celestia. Now all that was left was to find out what she wanted.

The sun goddess stared down at him with a knowing look. "You've noticed, haven't you?"

"Yeah." He said plainly.

Her weird behavior, constantly wanting to be around him, practically being glued to his side whenever they were together. Hell, she was supposed to be at work right now! Did she leave early? All of this could only mean one thing.

This bitch is in heat! RUN!!!

Celestia crossed her arms before raising one of her hands to her face and massaging her temples. "You chose the worst possible night to move in to her room."

"Hey, she was the one who suggested that we do it the very next day. I just rolled with it." He had to correct her on that much. Granted he didn't argue against it very much at all, but it was still her idea.

...Wait a minute!

The realization clicked, sending thousands of messages into his mind at once. His eyes widened as his hands came up and grabbed on to his head. "She fucking planned this!"

It's like you two built each other in a computer...It's creepy!

"Fuck! What do I do?"

Celestia gingerly placed a hand on his shoulder to get his attention. "I believe the best course of action would be to stay away from her. Just until her heat calms down."

That's...actually allot easier than my first plan.

"Yeah, that's probably a good idea." Ryan shrugged off the whole situation. It was just a simple problem with a simple solution. He loved being intimate with her, there was no doubt about that, but some of the stories that Celestia has told him about how some mares get still give him nightmares. He figured that it would be easier to just avoid her during this time.

Unless you WANT to wake up with a large rubber phallus in your ass.

"So," Celestia began, "how are you going to break it to her?"

Ryan's entire body went pale as an audible gulp escaped his throat. This was going to end badly, he could feel it.

Luna's bedroom door creaked open as Ryan attempted to force himself to enter. There were a couple of close calls, moments where he was ready to run off screaming, but Ryan aint no bitch.

You keep telling yourself that.

Shut up!

He makes his way into the room, his breath caught in his throat as he tries to come up with a million different excuses as to why he wouldn't be able to share a room with her for the next couple of days. His body forces him to exhale and take in a new wave of air. As he is about to just reach down for his bag, as it is the only thing he will need for the two or so days of separation, he hears a very enticing voice calling to him from the bed.

"Oh, Ryan~" The voice practically sang, causing his body to stand at attention like a soldier listening to a general. "What took you so long? I was starting to think that you weren't coming back." The door behind Ryan suddenly slammed shut, causing him to let out a less-than-manly yelp.

His mind was completely jumbled. Her voice flowed out of her mouth in a manner so smooth that silk would be put to shame. The way she was batting her eyelashes at him made his knees weak, then there was her body. As he eyed her he quickly realized that she was wearing what appeared to be a black latex suit.

...oh shit...

Luna laid across the bed on her stomach. Aside from her head, her entire body was covered in a very shiny, rubbery looking outfit. It was tight, tight enough to match the curves of her body, leaving very little for the mind to imagine.

He could do nothing but watch as she rolled on to her back, her eyes still glued to him as she ran her hands down the smooth material, letting her fingers trace over every line on the front of her body. "Mmm, you like what you see?"

"I think I peed..."

That's not pee...

Luna giggled at the human before patting her right hand on the bed. "Come on now. I'm not going to bite."

Ryan hesitated for a moment. While part of him was screaming yes at the top of it's lungs, another part knew that he had to leave. Now! "Sorry, sweetheart, but I don't think we can-"

Her expression turned to something...less than pleased. She patted on the bed again, this time harder. "You will obey your mistress or you will be punished."

"Yes ma'am!"

Oh God, take me now!

What's taking him so long? Celestia wondered. He's been in there for over fifteen minutes.

Ryan had entered Luna's room about fifteen minutes ago while Celestia waited outside for him, just in case. She was listening for anything; screaming, hollering, the jingle of chains gliding across each other...Her ear twitched as she picked up on the sound. Yep, it was definitely chains. That's weird. What are they doing with chains? Part of her assumed the worst, but she shrugged it off. No, my sister would never do something like that. She's not that kind of mare.

Regardless of her beliefs, she still felt the need to go check on him. Luna might be upset with the information that they would have to wait a little longer to share a room, so he might be comforting her. That, or she's beating him with a stick. In hindsight, she probably should have gone to check on him sooner.

As she opened the door, she was met with a sight she will not soon forget. Her younger sister on her knees with Ryan hanging from the ceiling by two thick metal chains that were cuffed to his hands. Luna was wearing a latex bodysuit with the zipper pulled down to her stomach, allowing her large breasts to be free from the rubbery prison. Ryan was completely naked with a shirt tied around his mouth.

Celestia stared in shock and awe at the two, who noticed her upon arrival, unable to say or do much of anything. Much to her surprise, as if this wasn't enough, the door behind her closed and Luna rose.

The night princess made her way over to her older sister, her mind still lost in a state of lust that she simply could not control. Once she was within range, she reached out and grabbed Celestia by the hair, pulling her into an aggressive kiss.

The shock from earlier had left her body frozen, but this was more than enough to snap her out of her trance. Celestia broke the kiss and pulled away from Luna. "Sister! What do you think you're-" She was cut of by her own gasping as she felt her sister's hand beginning to rub against her slit.

"Oh, dear sister of mine, you truly do need to loosen up." Luna re positioned her fingers, rubbing against her sisters clit with her thumb while her middle and index finger poked around at her entrance through her undergarments. This caused Celestia to moan loudly. Luna shushed her sister as she reached into her sibling's clothing and continued her assault. "Relax, just enjoy it."

As much as Celestia wanted to fight this, she simply couldn't. The feeling of her sister's fingers attacking her most sensitive area was driving her wild. She didn't want this to end, she wanted more.

The once regal mare was thrown into a state of pure lust and began treating her sister in kind. The two stood side by side, fingering each other and moaning into the others mouth as the human watched.

The sight was clearly very arousing. Within a matter of seconds his dick swollen to the absolute limit; he could feel his pulse vibrating through his cock, as well as a painful throb that followed.

The two sisters stopped assaulting each other and turned their attention over the the human. It was weird how they did it at the exact same time. It was almost like they could both feel his arousal and knew that his body was as ready as it would ever be. They made their way over to him, slowly stripping out of their clothing in front of him.

Ryan could tell just by looking at Celestia that her assets were definitely a bit more well-endowed than Luna, but once her dress was gone he could see the truth behind it. Simply put, the clothing she wore lied for her body, they were much bigger without clothes.

humunahumunahumunahumunahumunah

The human was literally drooling at the two alicorn princesses gracing his sight, he couldn't help it. If it weren't for the makeshift gag in his mouth he would have started forming puddles at his feet. He watched as the sisters glanced at each other knowingly, it was almost like the two could talk with their minds. The chains he wore disconnected from the ceiling and reconnected to the bed. With the chains moved his body was levitated on to the bed, with his hands still cuffed together. With a few quick adjustments his arms were officially stuck above his head and the two princesses climbed on to join him on the comfortable mattress. He tried to say something, but all that came out were muffled moans.

Luna placed a finger to his mouth, shushing him as she did so. "Hush now, darling." Once he was quiet she placed a hand on his cheek and nodded to Celestia, who lowered herself down Ryan's form. "We'll take care of you, my pet. I promise."

His eyes widened and his body tensed up as a warm wet feeling began to swallow down his length. He looked down by his waist to see Celestia deep-throating his cock while one of her hands gave his balls a soft but firm squeeze. She was, by all means, amazing. The way that she was holding him in almost effortlessly, the way her tongue was caressing him the whole way around his shaft. If his body hadn't been as well trained he would have burst right then and there. This mare knew her stuff.

Before long Celestia lifted her head before plopping it back down, sending wave after wave of pleasure circulating through his body. With the elder sister working on his body, the younger one decided that hers deserved to be treated as well.

Luna removed the shirt that had been tied around his mouth before raising up and placing one of her legs on the other side of Ryan's head, letting her hot, wet entrance rest against his mouth. "Come on now, my pet. You may only have treatment like this if you earn it."

Message received!

Ryan let his tongue slither out of his mouth and across the mare's folds, rubbing up against every inch of her soaked marehood as he searched for his target. Luna was moaning like an animal Ha! as he did this, but once he found her clit...He could have sworn someone just up and stabbed her from out of no where.

Needless to say; that day started off very interestingly, went on very loudly, and ended in a small pile of sore, exhausted, bipedal creatures huddled up against each other.

"And, just to wrap this one up nice and tight, I had allot of fun." Ryan finished explaining to the mare across the table. "Yes, everything on my everywhere hurts like hell, but it was worth it." He took a sip from the wooden mug, his face twisting a bit from the flavor of the harsh drink. "So, Dawn, now you know how my day went. You regretting it yet?"

The red mare stared over at his bruised body with a somewhat envious look on her face. Her hands were practically pulling at random chunks of her brown hair as she gazed at him with her large green eyes. Finally, she spoke in a thick accent that Ryan could only recognize as Russian. "Not even in the slightest. If I am being honest with you, I am rather jealous."

Damn. I didn't expect to hear something like that from her.

"I never pictured you as that kind of mare, but then again I rarely ever see you. And the times when I do happen to run into you it only lasts, maybe, two seconds." He hadn't spent much time with this mare at all since his first day in Equestria. She was allot more chill than he expected, and really fun to talk to. "We really need to hang out more."

"Perhaps we could hang out more, you just need to stop being coward about drink." She gave him a semi-serious, but also teasing look as she said this.

"I already fucking explained this! Vodka will make me go to bed, then wake up, and puke...Unless you wanna clean up that mess, I'm sticking to my Bourbon."

"It is fine, I understand...Pussy."

Excuse you, bitch!

Ryan slammed his fist down on the table, "That's it, you and me, right now. I will drink your ass right under the fucking table!"

A Day With A Friend

"Nooo..." Luna tiredly pleaded, holding onto Ryan's arm to keep him from leaving the bed. "Come back and cuddle with me."

It's very difficult to say 'no' to cuddling with a mare as beautiful as Luna, especially when she was laying naked in the bed that they shared. However, Ryan was a man, he would not fall victim to her feminine charms! "I'm sorry, Luna. But, I promised to meet Dawn early today so we could actually hangout for once."

Luna grabbed the blanket covering her and threw it open. In her weary state of mind she was just silently begging for him to come back to bed. On the human's side though, she was completely exposing herself to him. Her body was as tempting as it was gorgeous. Maybe he could lay down for a few more minutes...

No, we must not be seduced!

Ryan shook all perversions from his head and pulled out of Luna's grip. She was reluctant to accept him leaving, but she would accept it. Honestly, she didn't know why he wanted so badly to spend time with the mare he was going to see. Her knowledge of her sister's guard was limited, so she knew nothing of this Dawn Breaker. Maybe she was fun to hangout with...maybe more fun than her...

Once that thought entered Luna's mind, it began to steadily grow. Maybe this mare was prettier than her, or even has been dropping hints that she would do things for him. She began to think about something, something that made her heart hurt. What if he was planning on sleeping with her?

Luna looked up to see her mate putting on a clean pair of clothes. He slid on his signature blue jeans, a white T-Shirt, and a red flannel jacket with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. Her features started to fall as her mind continued to plague her with thoughts of insecurity and suspicion.

"Ryan," She spoke quietly, earning the now fully dressed human's attention. "I love you. You know that, right?"

He was honestly very confused with her saying this. Not really that she said it, but more of how she said it. It sounded almost as if she were extremely sad. Like in a way that a girl might act if she thought you were...

RED LIGHT!!!

Ryan couldn't help but chuckle a bit before walking over to the bed and placing a hand to his girlfriend's cheek. "Of course I do. And, I love you too." As honest as it was, he really hated saying 'I love you.' It just felt weird to him.

Once upon a time he didn't believe in love, but his feelings for her had grown to a level that only that word was capable of describing it. Luna knew that he didn't originally believe in love, and was patient with him when it came to saying it. She knew he still felt weird, but at the moment that only pushed her suspicions further. Maybe he didn't actually love her.

Her nerves suddenly relaxed as he placed a passionate kiss on her muzzle. The kind of kiss that told you that there was no way this person felt nothing for you. She could feel her suspicions for him subsiding, it wasn't him that she shouldn't trust. However, the mare he was going to see was a whole different story.

Ryan broke the kiss and gave her a warming look. "I have to go, okay. Have fun at work, tell your sis I said 'Hi', all that bullshit." Luna giggled at him, signifying that he was good to go.

He exited the room and closed the door before making his way down the hall. He spotted Celestia walking down toward the night wing of the castle, probably going to grab Luna so they could get started on the work day.

Celestia spotted Ryan and flashed a smile in his direction. Just as she was about to give a light wave and say hello, the human ran past her at a full sprint before yelling at her. "I fucked your sister!"

The mare froze in place, her eyes wide as she did so. Her face soon moved on to a deadpan expression and her horn started to light up. In the distance she could hear Ryan yelp as he fell to the floor.

"Ow...fuuuuuck!"

Celestia smiled triumphantly and continued making her way to Luna's room.

Even I knew that was just plain stupid

Dawn Breaker sat patiently at the bar within the Canterlot Pub. She had one hand placed upon the counter while the other was gripping a small glass filled with a clear liquid. She swallowed down the strong beverage before slamming it down on the wooden surface. "Another one."

The bartender nodded, grabbing a tall glass bottle labeled 'Everfree Vodka' and refilling her glass. Once it was filled his attention was drawn to the entrance as a strange creature with red stains going down its face entered. "Sir, are you alright?"

Dawn Breaker looked back to be met with the same sight, only she was able to recognize him quickly. Ryan walked over to the counter and took a seat beside her, the lower half of his face and a good majority of his hand covered in blood. "I'm fine. You got a towel?"

The stallion nodded and tossed the human a rag. "Thanks."

Ryan started whipping the blood from his hands first before moving on to his face. Dawn stared at him, slightly confused as to why he seemed to be bleeding so much. "What happened? You got into fight with small bunny?"

"Har-de-har-har." He mocked, lightly dabbing his nose with the rag. "No. Your, ever so lovely, sun god thought it would be funny to undo my shoe laces while I was running down the hall. Ended up making out with the floor pretty hard after that."

"Sounds fun. You do something to make her mad?" She asked, knowing the princess wouldn't do something like that unless provoked. She has been in the guard for a good couple of years now. And, although she doesn't know the princess personally, she does know about a select few of her quirks.

"No..."

LIAR!!!

Ryan finished cleaning himself off and tossed the rag into a nearby trash bin. The bartender then looked at him. "Can I get you anything sir?"

"Yeah, I'll take a glass of Bourbon."

"Pussy..." Dawn muttered, earning her a stern look from the human beside her.

"I will break my foot off in your ass, bitch."

Celestia could do nothing but watch as her sister ran around her room. She was practically tearing it apart, looking for something. "What do you mean you want to take the day off?"

"I mean, I want to take the day off." She replied, soon finding an outfit she could wear without being noticed.

This was confusing to the sun goddess. The second she walked in here she found Luna digging around in Ryan's drawers and pulling out a number of his clothes, then she started demanding to have the day off without so much as looking at her. "I understand that, but why?"

The night princess quickly started slipping on some of the human's clothes. "Because I want to make sure that mare isn't going to try anything with my mate...and that he won't allow her to do so either."

Now the pieces were starting to come together. Celestia's face soon put on a knowing smirk. "Okay, I see where this is going. You're jealous."

Luna paused just as she was about to put a shirt on before turning to face her sister. "I am not jealous, I am just being cautious." She slipped the shirt on then moved on to grabbing a pair of old shoes.

"Sister, don't you think you're overreacting a bit. I thought you trusted Ryan."

She paused again, trying to find the right words. "O-of course I do, I trust my mate completely. It's that mare I don't trust." Luna finished getting dressed and looked over herself in a mirror. She was now wearing a black T-shirt and a pair of black cargo pants. "This should do."

Luna's horn became illuminated and soon her whole body became engulfed in a bright light, causing Celestia to squint her eyes a bit. When the light was gone, her sister looked different. Her mane was straight, as it had completely lost its magical flow, and was black as night. Her fur was a darker shade of blue, and her wings were gone. Lastly, her massive chest had become smaller, as did the roundness of her flank. If Celestia hadn't just watched her sister transform she would have sworn she was a completely different mare.

"There, now he shouldn't recognize me." She said, pulling out an assortment of fake piercings and clipping them on to her ears and lip.

Celestia knew very well that Luna had done this before, she had caught her in the act several times. It was actually a pretty clever idea. She would never admit this to her little sister, but she had even done it a few times. It was nice to get away from the castle every now and again. It was a way to kick back and just enjoy herself.

"Luna," Celestia began, "I will humor you this once, because I know that by the time this is over, you will regret ever doubting him."

Luna rolled her eyes at her older sister as she put on the finishing touches to her face. The piercings were done, so all that was left was to add a touch of dark blue eye-liner and black lipstick. "Perfect."

"~I can’t stay with you for nothing, only a crazy man would

But I still can never leave you

Cause you look…"

Ryan waited for the beat to catch up, then kicked up his speed tenfold. The shirtless human had gotten intoxicated to the point that he decided to jump onto the counter and sing. He even grabbed Dawn and pulled her up with him. The crowd began cheering as he went on with the song. He was actually a bit surprised that they were enjoying it so much, most of the ponies in this town were usually a bunch of snobs.

"Got it in an act when you been breaking my back

You give it to me, give it to me

I ain’t giving it back

Get a text from my ex wondering what's up with that

And I reminisce of this of eatin' up a kitty cat

Seen the pickin', pick a time on the flow

And I wish that Crystal walk out the door

Do her thing and just about ready to go

But she kiss me, now I can’t eat for sho

And you know…"

The beat slowed down a bit and Ryan followed suit, couldn't be fucking up the show by improvising. That would just be a dick move. He was really enjoying the attention up here.

"~Your love is like schizophrenia

And I be like a-ya-ya-ya

Don’t know what done got into ya

Maybe I try ya-ya-ya

Your love is like schizophrenia

And I be like a-ya-ya-ya

I’ll be your strait jacket, hold you tight

Maybe then you’ll be alright now."

Ryan looked over at Dawn and tossed her the mic. She caught it, despite her intoxication, but she wasn't as far gone as Ryan. She held the mic up to her lips and began singing along to the song. She had no idea where the lyrics were coming from, but what she was saying just felt right.

"You make me mad, you make me...

You make me...crazy!

You make me mad, you make me...

Make me say!"

Feeling as though it was the end of her verse, she tossed the mic back to Ryan who continued to just throw lyrics out as if he knew them all by heart. In all honesty, he did.

I never would have guessed...

"This is the drug I will be talkin' about.

Delivery… love you

This is the drug I will be talkin' about.

Delivery… love you"

The beat ended and Ryan dropped the microphone before hopping off of the counter. The crowd was cheering like crazy, but he ignored them and held a hand out to Dawn. She took it and made her way off of the counter as well. "Such a gentlecolt."

What surprised Dawn was, not only that Ryan was able to sing so well, but that the bartender was letting the two of them stand on the counter to sing. No pony even cared when Ryan had, at some point, taken his shirt off and thrown it into the crowd. She couldn't help but laugh at this.

"I try." He said with a smirk. His attention was then drawn to a stallion who was coming up behind Dawn. "You know this guy?"

Dawn put on a confused expression before following Ryan's gaze to the stallion that was now standing just a few inches behind her. He was just a bit taller than her, his body was covered in orange fur, and his mane was an ugly shade of green. It almost looked like seaweed. "Can I help you?"

He wore a very unsettling smile on his face. "Actually, you can. You see, I saw you on the counter singing and dancing and I just thought-"

His words were cut off as the red mare lifted a finger to his face. She knew where this was going and wasn't interested. "I am sorry, friend, but I will pass."

The stallion's smile turned into a very angry frown. He took a step forward, but stopped when the shirtless human behind the mare stepped in between them. "Back up, buddy. You don't wanna piss me off, trust me."

He scoffed at the creature and reached a hand out, placing it on his shoulder and lowing himself a bit so they were eye level. "Listen here, punk; Either you can move out of my way or I'll snap you in half in front of all of these nice ponies."

Ryan was ready to unleash hell on this overgrown prick, but stopped when he heard an unfamiliar voice speak up from behind him. "Is there something wrong here, baby?"

He turned around to see a dark blue unicorn mare with a jet black mane standing beside Dawn with an arm around her.

...what!?

The mare grabbed Dawn's muzzle and pulled it so she would be looking directly at her. Once their eyes met she leaned in and kissed her on the lips, causing Ryan's jaw to drop a bit as his eyes scanned the mare.

While his attention was stuck on the two the stallion pushed past Ryan and placed a hand on both mares. They separated, Dawn looking at the mare in confusion while she stared up at the stallion. "Well, this is definitely going to be allot more fun now."

Luna gave the stallion a dirty look before reaching up and grabbing the him by the balls, using her alicorn strength to literally crush them through his pants.

His hands fell from the mares and he dropped to the ground with am 'oof', holding his, more than likely popped, cranberries.

Damn, she fucked him up with one hand!

The mare's attention moved from the stallion to the human, then to Dawn. "So, how about I buy us a few rounds?"

The three sat at a small table with mugs of hard cider in front of them and discussed the events that had just taken place. It was a bit out of no where and left them all confused, minus the mystery mare.

"I could tell you didn't want anything to do with the guy, so I tried to play the lesbian lover card." She explained, "Usually it works, but he was much more persistent than I anticipated. It just seemed like the best course of action."

Dawn was put at ease now that she knew why the mare had randomly come up and kissed her. It may have been weird, but she was just trying to help. "I appreciate your assistance, miss..."

"Moonlight."

"Well, thank you for your help, Moonlight. If you'll excuse me, I must find mare's room." Dawn rose from her seat and walked off to find the bathroom, leaving Ryan and Moonlight to their own devices.

Moonlight leaned on the table and gave Ryan a look that almost seemed flirtatious. "Quite the mare you got there."

Ryan shrugged with a light smile plastered on his face. "Yeah, she's pretty cool. Just wish I could hangout with her more." He grabbed his mug and took a swig of the cider before placing it back on the table.

"Really now?" Her curiosity was going nuts. Why does he want to see her so much. "Why is that? You looking to have a little fun with her?"

His eyes widened and he waved his hands out defensively. "Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!...Slow down there. No, I don't. I'm in a committed relationship, okay. The last thing I wanna do is fuck that up."

This brought some comfort to Luna, but she has to keep playing the role she was in. "Come on, you're telling me you don't want a piece of that even a little bit? Be honest here."

His expression went from defensive to very stern. "I am. I like Dawn, she's a great friend and a cool pony. But, I don't have those kind of feelings for her."

"Hmm, what's so special about this mare you're with?" She wasn't sure why she asked this, maybe she was just becoming insecure. She was curious as to how he would respond though.

Ryan had to think about this for a minute before answering. "Honestly, I can't think of one thing in particular. I mean, everything about her is just so fucking great! Her eyes, her mane, that sassy attitude she has. She's everything I've looked for in a partner and more. One of my favorite qualities about her is her strength. She's strong both inside and out. I can literally fight this woman and she'll beat the hell outta me in response." He laughed a bit as he recalled the memories of their sparing. "But most of all, I love the fact that she's honest with me. Not once has she ever lied to my face. And I know that no matter what, she's always gonna be there for me."

It took Luna everything she had to hold in her emotions. She wanted so badly to just leap over the table and tackle him into a hug. She should have known better than to do this, she should have just trusted that he wouldn't let anything happen. Celestia was right, she feels like a total jackass now.

"Even now, she's here for me. She kept me from likely getting my ass beat by that stallion, and now we're having a few drinks together." He watched as Moonlight's expression suddenly changed to pure shock.

"I-I umm, I don't, I..." Luna was at a complete loss for words. "H-how!?"

"Oh, please." He said with a shit-eating grin. "I could tell it was you from the start. A; I can literally feel when you're near me. And b;" He paused for a moment then pointed to her leg. "There's a bleach stain on the left leg of those pants you're wearing."

She looked down to her left leg. He was right, there was a brown spot that seemed to be imprinted on the dark material. Clearly it didn't belong there, and there was no way it could be something as simple as dirt.

"Yeah, I know my clothes. Those are the pants I was wearing back in my world when I went down to Florida to help my grandfather after he had surgery. I had to bleach this plastic pond he had in his back yard and ended up splashing myself with the shit."

Luna looked back up at him and smiled. "I don't really see how that part is relevant if you can feel whenever I am around."

"I was a little distracted at first. The pants were the first thing I noticed that gave you away." He started laughing she rolled her eyes at him and flipped him off. It was weird to him that ponies had no idea what it meant when he did that. He had to actually explain it to Luna and she started using it allot. Not as much as him, but it would pop up from time to time. "So, what brings you out here, sweetheart? Couldn't stand going without me for so long?"

"You're so full of yourself." She commented, her face turning to a frown as she lowered her gaze and prepared herself to answer him. "I came out here to watch over you."

"Jealous much?"

Her eyes darted back up to him. It was starting to get on her nerves how he is finding all of this out so quickly. "How did you-"

"I might be new to this whole magic thing, but I told you, I can feel it. Anything that's going on with you, I can just barely pick up on it as long as I'm really focusing."

Luna took a deep breath and finally asked what has been bothering her this entire time. "So, you don't have feelings for Dawn?"

Ryan shrugged, "I don't know. I mean, she is pretty cute. And that accent, oh my Satan! I wanna fuck her throat!"

"Ryan!"

The human started laughing like a mad-man at Luna as her face turned red with frustration. "I'm just kidding, chill out." He calmed down and cleared his throat, still smiling at her. "No, I have no interest in Dawn. And hell, if you don't believe me, go ahead and check."

"Excuse me?"

"You're more connected to magic than I am. If I can tell when you're feeling jealous, then you should be able to tell if I'm lying and if I have any feelings for her. So go ahead." He leaned back in the chair and waited. He wouldn't admit this out loud, but it was actually a bit bothersome that she actually thought he was just going to go out and mess around with Dawn. It almost made him feel like she didn't trust him.

Luna was tempted to do as he said to make sure that he wasn't lying, but she didn't need to. She could tell by looking into his eyes that he was telling the truth, she could also tell that he was a little upset with her. For the second time in the past five minutes, she felt like a complete jackass. "No, I will not."

"What?" Ryan seemed genuinely shocked by this.

She nodded at him and smiled. "I don't need to. I can tell that you mean what you say, without even digging through the bond we share. I love you Ryan, and I trust you completely."

The human smiled at his mate and before too much longer Dawn came back to see the two staring blankly at each other and smiling. She audibly cleared her throat to catch their attention. "I am not interrupting something, am I?" She asked with a hard gaze, her arms crossed as she spoke.

Ryan looked up at Dawn and nodded, "Nope, just spending time with a friend is all." He pushed Dawn's chair out from the table with his foot. "Care to join?"

Author's Note

Song:

Internal Love

"I can't believe she fucking hit me!" Ryan said as he rubbed a red knot on his jaw.

The human had taken refuge within the bedroom he shared with his mate, sitting on the edge of the bed as he tried to massage the pain out of his face, caused by events that had taken place earlier that day.

"In her defense," Luna began, "You were kissing a strange mare while hiding out in an ally." She said with a smirk.

"Need I remind you that the Strange Mare was you?"

"You might have known that, but she didn't."

Ryan paused as he thought about what Luna had just said. It was true that he figured out the mystery mare was Luna all along, but Dawn had no idea. He had taken Luna out back after a while and started making out with her. Dawn had gotten suspicious and followed him out to see that him shoving his tongue into the mare's muzzle.

No words were exchanged as the solar guard walked up and socked him in the jaw, very hard I might add. As he was getting back onto his feet, Luna revealed herself to the angry mare and explained the situation.

"I guess you have a point there..."

Luna smiled, knowing she was right. Dawn had apologized once she had found out the truth behind the mystery mare, and she was glad Ryan wasn't mad at her.

She loved how he never let things bother him, especially when he knew that what had happened was a mistake or a simple misunderstanding. This was only one of the many thing she envied of him.

After grabbing some ice and wrapping it in a paper towel, she walked over to the bed and took a seat beside her mate. She pressed the cool material to the knot on his face to help bring down the swelling.

Ryan smiled, thanking her as she did this.

They sat in relative silence for a moderate amount of time as Luna pondered an idea that had been crossing her mind as of late. She lowered the ice pack from him, the swelling had reduced dramatically, then swallowed hard as she prepared herself to vocalize the thoughts she had been having.

"Ryan, I would like to try something with you, if you don't mind." She asked with a nervous tone.

He was able to tell rather quickly that what she was about to purpose was something that was bothering her. He knew that whatever she recommended would not be something bad, she would never do anything to hurt him, but something told him that it might be a bit sketchy.

Please no butt stuff, please no butt stuff, please no butt stuff...

Luna continued to wear a nervous expression on her face, which only seemed to grow when Ryan shot her a questioning gaze. "It might seem a bit odd, and maybe even a tad bizzar, but I feel like it will make things more...interesting."

I don't want to be sodomized!

"Go on..." Ryan said, hiding his internal freak out as best as he could.

Luna began rubbing her thumbs together and took a deep breath before continuing. "I learned of an interesting spell a little while ago. It's supposed to help our bond grow at a much faster rate."

Oh, thank Cthulhu!

"What it does, is it helps our minds connect more. Whenever we are to be within the vicinity of one another, it creates a small world, of sorts, for certain parts of our consciousness to enter; One in which they would be able to freely interact with each other, but still remain in their respective places."

Ryan took a minute to let her words sink in. It was not what he feared hearing from her, but it was definitely weird. So weird, in fact, that he had no idea what the hell she was talking about. "Uhh, brain?"

The girl is going to let your mind and hers basically co-exist. Your mind communicates with hers and vice versa.

The human nodded as a look of realization came across his features. It didn't sound too bad really. I mean, her being able to link them together in a way was a little weird, almost feels like a violation of privacy. However, she did say this would strengthen their bond, so no matter how uncomfortable it makes him, he will allow it. He really cares about Luna, his biggest fear lately has been losing her. If this will make them stronger as a unit, then he's ready.

"Okay, how does it work?"

Luna's eyes widen in shock. "Really? Just like that, you're going to allow this?"

"Yeah. Is it a problem?"

"No, not at all. I just..." She paused and rubbed her neck, still feeling a bit weird with how he reacted. "I was expecting a bit more reserve, or even a strong hesitation."

He sighed, feeling as though what he was about to say came straight out of a very shitty romance movie. "If I'm being completely honest with you, I'm not too fond of the idea. It's weird, it's invasive, it makes me uncomfortable." He noticed at this moment that Luna was about to butt in and say something, so he spoke up to cut her off. "But, If this is going to help our relationship, and help keep it strong, then I will do it."

Luna couldn't help but to continue staring at him in shock.

"I love you, Luna. I don't say it enough, but it's true. I will do anything to make sure that you and I will stay together, even if it means I have to step out of my comfort zone."

A single tear graced Luna's cheek as he spoke. She smiled and opened up her arms to him. "Come here."

Ryan leaned into her, accepting the embrace before looking into her eyes. He could tell that she was thankful for him doing something he didn't like just to make her happy. The two stared silently at each other and pressed their lips together, sharing a strong but loving kiss as the moment went on.

Luna's horn began to light up after a few seconds. Ryan could feel an odd new sensation going through his head. It was uncomfortable, but not painful. It was a strange, pulsing feeling. Like there was a heartbeat separate from his own in his brain. The pulsing stopped and the kiss broke.

"How do you feel?" She asked worriedly.

"I feel fine. A little dizzy, but fine."

She smiled and kissed his forehead.

Ryan and Luna sat on a mountain top, staring up at the sun with little to no interest.

The human was donned in all black clothing. He wore only a pair of clean black cargo shorts and a black sleeveless shirt.

Luna was dressed in clothes much like his. She wore what he could only recognize as black basketball shorts and a simple black tank top. Her mane didn't have its magical flow to it and was a light shade of blue.

They continued to stare at the sun for a little while longer before Luna piped up to express her feelings on the matter. "This is relaxing and all, but it just doesn't feel right...you know?"

"Like you're not in your element?" He asked.

"Yeah!"

"I can fix that." Ryan rose to his feet and stared up at the giant ball of fire that rested in the sky. With little hesitation he raised his right hand and snapped his fingers.

The light of the sun immediately vanished as the flames went out. The large orb then turned white and casted a new form of light across the area.

"Better?" He asked with a smile.

"Much." She replied, staring at him with a dreamy look in her eyes.

The human smiled back at her then snapped his fingers again. The light of the moon became focused onto him like a spotlight as he continued snapping his fingers to the beat of a song that seemed to be playing from out of no where.

Luna looked up at him, a knowing blush quickly spreading across her face. She may not know much about his world, and even less about music there, but she knew that a song was coming on, and he was going to sing it to her.

"~I gotta take a little time

A little time to think things over

I better read between the lines

In case I need it when I'm older."

Luna leaned forward as Ryan sang to her, becoming enticed by the words and the tones. Something about it seemed almost sad, like he had been through some kind of pain. Rather then interject though, she just sat still and listened.

"~This mountain I must climb

Feels like the world's upon my shoulders

Through the clouds I see love shine

It keeps me warm as life grows colder."

Ryan moved closer, holding his hand out to her. She gingerly took it and rose. His grip on her was soft, almost as soft as the look he was giving her. This song clearly meant something to him, it held some sort of connection to his being. She could tell from the light reddening around his eyes.

"~In my life there's been heartache and pain

I don't know if I can face it again

I can't stop now, I've traveled so far

To change this lonely life."

His arms wrapped around her body as he started slow dancing with the mare, a smile forming across his face as he did so. One that showed that he had been through allot, but he was ready to move on, ready to be happy. Happy with her.

Luna couldn't help but smile back as she danced with him. She could feel a growing warmth in her chest, one that made her happy. This moment right here, right now, was perfect. She never wanted it to end. Here they could pour their emotions out to each other without a single care in the world, here they could love each other with no limits.

"~I want to know what love is!

I want you to show me!

I want to feel what love is!

I know you can show me!"

The two picked up the pace with the last verse, dancing around in harmony with the other. There was nothing in this world that could stop them from enjoying their time together as they laughed and continued to hold each other.

"~I'm gonna take a little time

A little time to look around me

I've got nowhere left to hide

It looks like love has finally found me."

Ryan dipped her down, holding her up with a single arm. The beat began to fade away as her looked down at his marefriend with loving eyes. How could he have been so lucky to run into her, to be pulled into a different world entirely to share his life with such a beautiful creature.

Who cares. It doesn't matter how or why. They didn't care that things happened the way they did, nor that they weren't even the real versions of themselves. All that mattered right now was that they were together; two different creatures locked away in two different minds finally meeting and being able to express themselves in a way that not many others can. The two shared one last smile before leaning in and sharing a gentle kiss, locking their lips together in hopes that they would never have to break apart.

"Darkness, just how I like it." A voice said through the pitch black void that surrounded them. The voice clearly belonged to a female, but the way it spoke was strong, powerful. It had the tone of a leader.

A dark mare entered one particular area with the smallest bit of light coming from a lightbulb that dangled off of a nonexistent ceiling. Her fur was black as night and her mane and tail were a flowing blue. On her body was a set of skimpy-looking armor.

Nightmare Moon, a creature that feared by all now graced this dark land with her presence. A monster so great that very few have had the gull to stand against her and even less have shown her any form of affection; Minus the humanoid figure that sat on the ground just a few feet from her with its head facing the floor.

He was dressed in white pajama pants and a straight jacket; his clothes were stained with blood while his body was bound by both the jacket and several chains that were wrapped around his form.

The mare raised a brow at the creature. She had seen him only once before, but she could always sense when he was near, which almost constantly for some reason.

"It has been a while." She spoke, placing a hand against her hip.

The human's head rose, his angered expression softening as she entered his vision. "You again..." He spoke with a natural growl in his voice.

She lowered herself down to his level, leaning closer so their faces were almost touching. "Yes, it is me." She spoke as she began to feel his desire for her. "Aww, you're attracted to me? That's so cute." She said, pinching his cheek.

This annoyed him, but he found it difficult to remain mad at this mare. There was something about her that made him feel calm, but excited at the same time. He felt like a dog who's master finally came home after a long day at work.

Nightmare could feel something within her as well, something strong, but at the same time subtle. Seeing this thing again was like running into an ex lover, one whom you still cared deeply for. A combination of resentment and want filled her mind. She liked this thing, she didn't know why, but something about it appealed to her. It wanted him, it craved him.

The desire Ryan felt for the mare was growing stronger by the second as he stared hungrily at her. So much so that he attempted to jump at her. His attempts were brought to a grinding halt though by the chains that bound him. He turned his head to see a large block of cement behind him that the chains seemed to be connected to.

She chuckled a bit at this, flashing her fangs at him as she did so. "Look at you, trying to pounce on me like some kind of animal."

She wouldn't admit it, but Ryan's desire for her was kind of comforting. It made her feel wanted. With her past being the way it was, her trying to take over, being hated, being banished; it left a mark that she refuses to show. But, whether she shows it or not is irrelevant, the fact is that it hurt her. So finding something that does want her makes her feel good, like she's worth something.

However, Nightmare is not so easily won over. "You want me that badly, don't you?"

She rose up and took several steps away from Ryan before finding a spot to settle and facing him once again. "If that's the case, then come and get me."

Ryan looked at the chains, then back at her. His expression shifted to an angered determination as he rose to his feet and began pulling on the chains, using every bit of his strength to move closer to her. The chains were strong though, and the cement block was far too heavy for him to pull.

His body started to feel weak and he stopped, sweat pouring down his face as he looked up at her. His body was a mere few seconds away from collapsing.

The mare simply fluttered her eye lashes at him as she began removing her armor. "Such a pity, and here I thought you really wanted me." She mocked as her armor fell to the floor.

Ryan couldn't help but stare as she was quite literally stripping in front of him; revealing her exquisite body to the ragged looking human. HIs eyes became fixated on nothing but her. He watched as her massive chest rose and fell with every breath she took, her toned midsection flexing from even the slightest adjustment to her form, and the way her flanks would lightly shake with every movement she made.

Nightmare lowered herself back to the ground, sitting with her arms propping her body up from behind her. She could see how much he wanted her and she knew he could do it, all it would take is a little push. "Come, my pet. Don't keep me waiting." She said in a sultry, but still very firm, voice.

Something within Ryan began to grow, something strong that demanded that he obey this mare, that he do anything to be beside her. The chains holding him burst into flames, melting through his clothing and singeing his skin. With a sudden new-found vigor he pulled hard against the chains, surprising even himself as he heard the large block behind him dragging across the floor. The pain from the hot metal against his skin only fueled a much larger fire raging within him. With every step he took he pulled harder, moving closer at a faster pace until he was finally standing above her.

The flames vanished and his skin, as well as his clothes, repaired themselves. His body collapsed from exhaustion, causing him to fall onto Nightmare, who caught him. She wore a victorious smile on her face. He did want her, he wanted her so much he was willing to put himself through immense pain if it meant he could be by her side. "That's a good boy." She said, petting his hair and pulling his face into her chest to let him rest. "My good boy..."

Author's Note

Personally, I feel like this chapter was a little rushed and slightly confusing, so I apologize for that, but I really don't want to go back to change a bunch of shit.

Anyway, I really want to thank all of you who are reading this story, I'm glad so many of you are enjoying it. Please feel free to let me know of any mistakes I may have missed, otherwise just leave a comment below letting me know what you thought. Comments make me feel special.

That being said, I'll see y'all in future chapters. Adios!

Without you...

It's been nearly a week since Princess Luna has left the castle on official business. There was a matter of upmost urgency at one of the thestral training grounds, one that demanded her immediate attention. On that note, she left; leaving Ryan behind so she could handle the situation without any distractions. As much as she enjoyed his company, this was a royal duty. She couldn't allow her affections to get in the way of her responsibilities.

The first couple of days went by smoothly, but something was wrong. Ryan seemed to be growing a bit distant as time went by, always being on edge. He started keeping more and more to himself as each day passed, until he stopped leaving his room all together.

Celestia tried reaching out to him, but he never responded. He stopped eating, sleeping; she could hear him pacing around behind the door every time she came into the night wing to check on him.

His behavior had become more than worrisome to the Princess, but she didn't know how to go about this alone. So she sent a letter to Twilight; requesting her companionship. Twilight had become very good at reading ponies and always had useful information and even a few very clever ideas here and there. Her company could be of use.

Within the hour, Twilight arrived, stepping into the throne room to greet Celestia. "Hello, Princess." She said with a bow, still showing the upmost respect to her former mentor.

Celestia nodded, smiling down at the young mare she used to call her student. "Twilight, as I have said before, you don't need to address me by my title."

Twilight smiled nervously, rubbing the back of her neck. She knew she was no longer required to call Celestia, Princess, anymore. But, it was almost instinctive. She grew up calling her that and it just stuck.

"Sorry. Have you heard anything from Ryan yet?"

Celestia frowned and nodded. "Regretfully not. He's been keeping himself locked in his room for several days now and I fear for his health; both physical and mental."

Twilight raised a brow at this. Although she knew Ryan, she didn't know much about him. Her knowledge only went as far as knowing he was a bit odd with an even odder sense of humor. "What do you mean?" She asked with genuine curiosity.

"His bond with Luna has become quite the thing to admire. They have been almost inseparable." Celestia explained, rising from her throne and pacing back and forth in front of it. "I fear that her departure is having a negative impact on his mind."

Two thestral guards stood outside of the doors to their princess', and her mate's, chambers. They stood as still as statues, listening to the sound of something tapping within the room. Despite how annoying it would become after a few hours, they kept themselves in check and stayed in their respective places.

Much to their surprise, the tapping stopped and all was silent. This caused them to glance over at the other. In the last couple of days that noise was all they had that told them the human was still alive. What could have possibly made him stop?

The sound of something being shattered reached their ears from the other side and the two guards nearly jumped as the door clicked, signaling that it was about to be opened. It slowly swung away from its frame with an unsettling creek.

Once the door had fully opened a strange sight made its way out of the room. The bipedal, hairless form walked out from the dark of the chambers with its head hung low and its body trembling.

The guards locked gazes once again, an uncertain expression donning both of their features. they looked back at the human, who's head was slowly turning to meet them.

It was probably one of the most horrifying sights they had ever set their sights on. His face was pale, with dark rings around his eyes. The eyes themselves were bloodshot, nearly to the point that no white could be seen. He also seemed to be holding the neck of a broken bottle in his hand.

He just looked at them, his body still trembling as if he had done an eight ball of cocaine. "Where is it?" He muttered.

One of the guards cleared his throat and looked over at him curiously, not being entirely sure what it is he was looking for. "My apologies; but, what is it that you are-?"

"I LOST MY VIRGINITY AND I CAN'T FIND IT!!!"

Celestia and Twilight have been discussing strategies and ideas on how to reach out to Ryan. This conversation had gone on for several minutes, but they couldn't seem to settle on what the best plan of action would be. The conversation was soon cut off as one of Celestia's prized chefs burst into the throne room.

The two princesses nearly jumped from the shock of the sudden intrusion. Once they were able to collect who it was and mentally relax themselves, they stood up to greet the stallion.

"Gourmet, I trust this intrusion is of some sort of importance?" Celestia questioned as she scanned the rather irritant expression on his face.

Despite his anger, the chef respectfully bowed before going further into discussion. "I apologize for barging in here like this, princess, but I am a bit agitated at the moment."

Celestia raised a brow at him, as did Twilight. "I see. Would you mind explaining why?"

He nodded, "There are a select few bottles of wine that I keep in the kitchen at all times for my specialty meals. These wines are very hard to come by, and very expensive."

"Go on..." Celestia urged, becoming slightly annoyed herself as to why he was in here talking about wine.

Gourmet crossed his arms before continuing, still holding his cold gaze. "Well, from the looks of it, each and every bottle I had has gone missing. I do not know who took them, but they are extremely-"

Everypony in the throne room fell silent as an audible yelp echoed from the hall. Judging from the sound, they could conclude that it wasn't any farther than just outside of the door. Strangely enough, a conversation was struck by whatever was out there.

"Hey, guard pony." A very familiar voice spoke. One that both Celestia and Twilight recognized as the human mate of Luna. "Give me your spear."

"What?" The guard pony replied, "No."

"Give me your spear!"

"No!"

"Guard, give me your spear!"

"I said, no!"

"Come on, just a touch?"

"Get away from me!"

"Just the tip?"

Celestia sighed, "I think that's enough out of him."

Her horn began to glow as the human was levitated into the throne room from just outside of the entrance. He was placed not even a foot in front of her, flailing about wildly and trying to run toward the nearest guard.

"Givemeyourspear! Givemeyourspear! Givemeyourspear!" He yelled out, reaching for the guards who would just stare at him oddly. They were basically giving him a look that asked 'What the fuck?' in a thousand different ways.

Dude, calm drunk. You're down...

"Not yet I'm not!" He shouted to the voice in his head before collapsing onto his face. "Now I am...I feel like that should have hurt more..."

I can't feel our face.

Twilight grunted, "I'll take it from here."

Celestia nodded and thanked her as she left. Twilight would take care of the human while he recovered while she tends to the matter of Gourmet's special wines.

"And here I thought today was going to be a hassle..."

Twilight carried the human back to his room in her magic. She had tried walking normally by his side, but it would seem that his attention would keep getting caught on a number of different things and lead to her having to chase him down the hall. With him in her grasp, she mentally tried to puzzle together what was leading him to behave in such a way.

It clearly had something to do with Luna leaving, but why was he dealing with it in this manner. Wouldn't it have just been easier to seek out Celestia and speak with her about how he was feeling.

Ryan let out an audible belch. "I wantz twisslers..."

She sighed; not only did she not know what a tissler was, but he just wouldn't stop talking. And nearly everything he said either didn't make sense, or was completely incoherent. "I think what you need is to go to bed."

"But if I go to bed then I can't defeat the mightly dragon!" He said loud and proud, as if he were some knight who had shown up to save the day.

"Twinkle!" He called out, turning his head to face Twilight. "Twikle, twinkie..."

"Twilight." She corrected with an annoyed huff.

"Turkey, listen." He paused as she nearly growled at him. "This is important..."

Twilight's expression shifted to one of curiosity, but also caution. She didn't have a clue as to what he might say, but if he was claiming it was important then it was probably a good idea to listen at least a little bit.

He tried to lean closer to Twilight, but being suspended in the air made that a bit difficult.

She picked up on what he was trying to do and brought his face closer to hers, allowing him more than enough room to lean in a whisper whatever it was that he wanted to say to her.

Her eyes widened as he relayed a secret message to her, her face turning a deep shade of red before he finally leaned away from her and started laughing.

Celestia had agreed to pay for Gourmet's wines to be replaced and have the order shipped to him within the next few days. Luna was going to get a serious talking to about keeping her mate on some sort of leash. Never-the-less, no real damage had been done, so all was well for the time being.

Twilight re-entered the throne room just as Celestia had taken a seat back in her respective chair.

She watched as her former student made her way up to where she was with a strong shade of red forcing its way through the fur on her face. Her eyes would avoid making any sort of contact with the alabaster alicorn.

"Twilight, is everything alright?"

"Yep, everything is fine, just perfect!" She replied with a nervous smile, her eyes never moving anywhere near Celestia's position. She just couldn't bring herself to look at her former teacher. Not after hearing what Ryan had told her.

She couldn't help but replay the memory in her head over and over, rubbing her ear as she did so.

Ryan leaned into her ear before whispering, "You smell like Celestia tastes."

Twilight's eyes widened as he relayed the information to her, her face turning a dark shade of red as Ryan gently licked the edge of her ear and bit it before leaning back and laughing.

"Yeah, just perfect." Twilight repeated to herself.

Tonight could not get any weirder...

Just as that thought crossed her mind, the human could be seen sprinting down the hall; wearing literally nothing at all as he did so.

"Woo! We're going streaking!" He yelled enthusiastically. If his nude sprinting didn't catch the attention of everypony in the castle, then his screaming sure as hell did.

Twilight groaned and let her body sink into the chair. "I give up."

Ryan ran about the hall in his birthday suit, having the time of his life. He didn't know how his cloths had come off, but he wasn't exactly complaining either. The freedom felt nice. As fate would have it though, his fun came to a grinding halt.

More like sudden stop. Why is the world spin-ninging?

His body had collided with something very hard, causing him to stop dead in his tracks.

That wall came out of nowhere!

The human took a few steps back and, much to his surprise, discovered that he had not run into a wall. Rather, who he ran into, was a mare. One that he considered a very good friend; one that was completely red all over her body.

"Holy shit!" Ryan screamed, "You are sunburnt like a motherfucker!"

Dawn let out an annoyed sigh. She could already smell the stench of alcohol on his breath. He was clearly intoxicated, but she could have assumed that from his naked tirade through the castle.

"My friend, why is it that you are running about in the nude?" She asked, doing her best to bide her time and keep her eyes above his waistline. The last thing she needed was for another guard to see her glancing at the human's package and starting a rumor.

His left eye started squinting at her as he scratched at his head. "I don't know. I sewer, they just kind of vanished."

"I swear." She corrected.

"Hey, you shouldn't swear!" He exclaimed, pointing an accusing finger at her. "That's extremely rude, you fucking asshole!"

Dawn flinched at his sudden outburst, she wasn't expecting him to just up and yell at her. Then he started laughing at her reaction. The headache he was already causing her was going to drive her crazy.

She took a moment to close her eyes and massage her temples. That was very short lived. There was a slight tugging sensation coming from her side, where she kept her spear.

Her head raised from its previous position and turned to face Ryan, who was holding the end of her weapon in his hands and staring at her with an almost perverted smile.

"Give me your spear..."

Luna sat patiently in the back of the carriage, letting herself finally relax from all of the chaos that took place in the training grounds. The trip had been the exact definition of a walking nightmare. The only thing that helped her make it through the day were the thoughts of returning home to her sister and her love.

She could already feel his presence, they were getting close. She smiled at the thought of snuggling into her bed with Ryan and cuddling up against his warm skin. Laying her head on his chest and listening to his heart beat so smoothly that it practically sung her to sleep with its mystical tunes.

Her daydream was soon interrupted as the carriage came to a somewhat rough landing. "Princess, we have arrived."

Luna couldn't help but smile a bit at this information. Finally, she was home. She exited and stood just outside of the castle, looking up at it in all of its glory. Her eyes closed and she took a slow inhale of the air that surrounded the area.

Yep, it definitely still smells like home.

She smiled and released her intake, beginning her journey toward the entrance. She stopped, however, when she heard a strange noise in the distance. It wasn't one she recognized immediately; in fact, she didn't identify it until several shards of broken glassed rained onto the ground.

"Cause I'm free!"

Luna heard a voice sing from above her and instinctively looked up to find the source. Her breath became caught in her throat as she saw the naked human plummeting to his death.

"Free falling!"

She quickly extended her arms, catching him just in time and holding him in the same manner that a husband would hold his bride. Her breath became freed from her throat, allowing her to breathe properly once again.

Ryan looked around him, surprised that he was no longer falling. When his eyes finally found Luna a smile that could tear faces apart spread across his face. He quickly wrapped his arms around her neck and buried his face in her neck.

"Sweetheart, I missed you!" He said happily, glad to finally have Luna back from...

I'm sorry...you...but I can't fuckin'...remember...why she left. Something about emeralds?

Luna smiled, she had missed him as well, and his affectionate behavior was very much appreciated. However, one particular thought came to mind and was bugging her beyond anything she could ever comprehend.

"Ryan, why were you falling out of a window? And why are you naked?"

He pulled himself back a bit, thinking hard about what had just happened. "I don't know. Damn Russians."

She raised a brow at him before shrugging it off completely. "Oh well. As long as you're okay."

A blush quickly spread across face as she felt something large slide between her breasts. She looked down to see that Ryan had completely submerged his head into her cleavage.

Ryan hummed with delight. "I missed these too."

He rested his head within the large mountains of flesh, nuzzling her chest as he did so. If there truly was no god in this world, then the magnificent orbs that existed on this mare would not exist.

Praise be to the boob god...whatever her name might be.

...

Oh, come on! If there's anything in this world that knows what true mammary perfection is, it's a god damn woman.

Ryan was not in the right state to be fighting with himself; rather, he was in a pretty fantastic state for a little foreplay. He would have started sooner if the world weren't spinning so much. Apparently Luna was already walking down the halls toward the night wing.

Fuck, this bitch is fast.

Oh well, a little bit of nausea wasn't going to stop him. The fact that they were still in the hallway meant just about as much as the nausea as well.

He sneakily worked his fingers up to the neck of her shirt, he would have tried from the bottom, but with how she was carrying him, he would have been caught on the spot. Once he got ahold of the neck he pulled it down, hard.

Luna winced a bit at a slight pain she felt in the back of her neck. She felt a tugging on the front of her shirt, and soon enough, a cool breeze brushing across her bare breasts.

Her eyes immediately shot down to Ryan, who had somehow managed to pull down her shirt and bra so that her chest was completely exposed.

A deep blush spread across her face as she looked around the hall to make sure no pony was around to see her like this.

"What are you doing!?" She whispered to Ryan.

He completely ignored her and moved on to massaging one of her massive boobs in his hand. She let a small squeak at this, doing her best to hold back the moan that was so desperately trying to work its way out of her throat.

"Please, not here." She begged.

Ryan either didn't hear her, or was still completely ignoring her. Rather than stopping, he grabbed her other boob with his free hand. Now holding both of them at once, he began kneading his fingers into the soft mounds, earning him more satisfying squeaks from the lunar princess.

Just as she was about to plead with him again, he took one of her nipples into his mouth; suckling and nibbling on it once it was past his lips.

Luna threw her head back and moaned loudly, there was no way in holy hell she was going to be able to hold that one back no matter how hard she tried.

With her body now trembling and a growing wet spot in her pants, her mind finally kicked back into gear and she ran for their room as fast as she could.

They were about halfway there when she finally remembered that she was an alicorn. This small realization made her mentally slap herself just seconds before she teleported them into their bed.

Using her magic, her cloths became non-existent and the door to the room locked itself in place so no pony could get in.

She was only seconds away from ravaging Ryan when she realized that he had completely stopped his assault on her. Confusion kicked in and she inspected the human to see that he was fast asleep.

As much as she didn't want to wake him up, she had to. Her lust was calling to her and it's been a little over a week since she has had any release. She needed this.

Luna grabbed his arm and gently started to shake Ryan's sleeping form. "Baby, please, wake up."

He showed no response, just continued staying in the world of slumber.

She shook him again, this time harder. "Come on, you're the one who started this!"

His eyes just barely opened, earning him a bright smile from the mare. That smile quickly faded as he rolled over to face the other side of the room and began drifting off once again.

"Ryan? Ryan!" She started yelling out desperately, leaning over to shake him much more aggressively. "Wake up, dammit. You can't leave me like this!"

"Yes..." He muttered with a slight lisp. Being just loud enough for her to hear. "Yes I can."

Luna stopped shaking him and plopped her rear down onto the bed as she started pouting like a puppy. "You're such a dick!"

Author's Note

I originally intended for this chapter to be much more serious, but honestly, I liked this version much better. Plus it made more sense. I'll add some other bullshit major conflict for later.

Bonding With Family

Run, you stupid son of a bitch!

"What the hell does it look like I'm doing!?" The human sounded off, sprinting at full speed down the night wing hallways in nothing but a pair of black shorts.

Waking up this morning had definitely been interesting. He was laying peacefully in bed, his eyes opened, then he found himself being suspended in the air. A dark figure had emerged from a corner of the room, it was Luna, obviously, and she was holding a long black whip. At that moment, Ryan realized that he had fucked up.

It was quite the battle at first, mostly consisting of him struggling to reacquaint himself with gravity. Neither of them knew how, but Ryan had managed to break free from Luna's magic before promptly grabbing his shorts from the ground and taking off out of the room like a bat out of hell.

He had put a good deal of distance between himself and the lunar princess, but that whip had one hell of a range, and she was catching up quick.

"Stop running and face your punishment like a stallion!" Luna called out to him as she flew down the hallway. She would have snatched him up in her magic again, but he was somehow blocking her from doing so.

"I am not a stallion!" He loudly replied, "I am a man! A man who would like to keep his ass from being beaten to a bloody pulp!"

He continued sprinting until he found himself just outside of the throne room. A plan quickly came to mind as he caught sight of its entrance and he made a B-line right for it. Ryan burst through the door, quickly catching the attention of Celestia, as well as several solar guards.

"HALP!" He screamed desperately. "My bootyliciousness is at stake!"

Celestia didn't have time to respond as the human dove behind her chair and crouched down so he wouldn't be seen. There were a thousand different questions going through her mind at once, most of which were answered when she spotted Luna flying in with a whip in her hand and an annoyed expression on her face.

"I know you're in here." She said in a seductive tone, her features turning from annoyed to an odd mix of both sexy and mischievous as she began pacing around the room. "~It's time to come out and play."

Ryan couldn't help it, his smart ass attitude as well as his damn near childish nature kicked in when she tried to coax him to reveal himself. "Fuck your couch!"

...There are no words...to describe...how fucking stupid you are...

Luna's ear twitched and her head turned toward Celestia's throne. "Found you!"

She took flight, aiming to fly right over the throne to get to her prize hiding just on the other side. That was the plan. However, before she could even get to the throne her body became consumed in a golden aura and she froze in place. "Hey, let me go!"

Celestia watched as Luna started thrashing about in her magical hold, but to no avail. She wouldn't be able to get out no matter how hard she tried.

"Luna, what do you think you are doing?" She asked her younger sister with a stern look on her face. The kind of look you would get if your mother found you tracking bloo-I mean mud- through the house.

Luna crossed her arms and put on a stubborn expression. Clearly she wasn't looking to have a conversation with her sister. Especially when it came to as of why she was hunting down her mate like a dog.

"Luna..." Celestia pressed, her gaze growing more cold with each passing second.

She sighed, "If you must know, Ryan was misbehaving last night. So I was going to punish him."

Celestia rolled her eyes at her sister's words. "Oh please, not being able to bed you because he was tired is hardly something worthy of punishment."

The lunar princesses eyes widened dramatically. "How did you-?"

"I pay attention, sister. More so than you may realize." Despite her words, her knowledge on the matter came purely by accident. It wasn't really a matter of watching them, it was more of how she happened to be walking past the room and heard what was going on, on the other side.

"I'm going to put you down now," Celestia continued, "and I would like for you to take the day off to relax in your room."

"But, what about Ryan?" She asked, looking over her sister's shoulder to see the human's hand flipping her off from behind the chair. She growled at this, tightening her grip on the whip.

"I can handle him for a while." She said with pride. "Besides, he and I have yet to spend any real time together and I would really like to get to know my future brother-in-law."

Luna blushed, she hated when her sister teased her like this. Her eyes shifted from her sister, to the now standing human, then back again. She really didn't want to do this, but she knew that arguing with Celestia would only lead to bad things. After taking a moment to think things through she finally let out a sigh of defeat.

"Fine, I will retire to my chambers for the day."

"Woohoo!" Ryan cheered, raising his fists to the air victoriously. "I'm gonna live!"

Right as he said this, the button on his pants came undone, causing them to fall to his ankles and trip him. Ryan fell to the floor, smacking his head against the solid structure with a loud thump. "Ow, bitch!"

See that? You jinxed it. Fucking moron!

The two sisters giggled and performed a light high-five in honor of the human's torment.

With Luna now out of the way and spending the day in her room, Ryan was left at the mercy of the all powerful bitch herself, Princess Celestia. If that wasn't bad enough, she had invited Princess Cadence over as well. This way they could get to know the human more personally rather than by just hearing the stories Luna told about him.

So, here he was; Sitting in the dining room. To his left, at the head of the table, was Celestia. Sitting across from him was Cadence who, thankfully, decided to come to the castle without Shining Cock-hole.

I really don't like that guy...

They all sat in an almost awkward silence. Nothing had been said since they took their seats and ordered their food. Cadence nearly gagged a few times when she had heard Ryan order a cheese burger; cooked rare so it was nice and bloody. That made him laugh a bit.

After a few minutes, the silence was finally becoming unbearable. Luckily Cadence decided to speak up first. "So, Ryan. Do all humans eat meat like you do?"

He could see that his eating habits were slightly unsettling to her, which made this much more amusing, but he didn't see the point in going completely nuts about it and telling her that humans were meat crazy freaks. That might get him into allot of trouble. Might as well just stick to the facts.

"Yes and no." Ryan answered simply, causing the pink alicorn to cock her head slightly in confusion.

"What do you mean? If you don't mind me asking."

He shrugged a bit. "People have their own preferences. Some humans like their meat bloody, like me, but most prefer a lack of blood. Some humans don't even eat meat, it's just how they are. We're a very diverse species, so it all depends on your background and personal decisions...Then you have the cannibals."

Celestia, who was sipping a glass of water as he spoke, began choking on the liquid and spit out most of what she had drank. "I beg your pardon?" She asked once she had managed to get her bearings back.

"Yeah, they exist. Some interesting people they are." He explained, "In some countries its normal, in most it's heavily frowned upon, if not illegal. There are exceptions for if you're stranded out in the middle of nowhere with no food and someone dies from natural causes, but that's overcomplicated shit."

The two princesses glanced over at each other, then back at the human. "I think I'd like to change the subject." Cadence said in a shaky voice. "How's your relationship with Luna going?"

"She tried to beat me with a whip not even an hour ago." He replied with a deadpan expression. He could see Celestia doing her best to hold back a smirk. "Yeah, I bet that one tickles your fancy, doesn't it? Sick bastard."

Celestia blushed and now it was Cadences turn to hold back her amused expression.

Anyway, do you have any hobbies?" Cadence asked with a slight twinkle in her eyes.

That's weird...

Ryan nodded. "Yeah, I have a few. I like fighting, wrestling. Uhhh...I sing sometimes."

The princesses' eyes both widened. "Really!?" They asked in unison, causing the human to jump back a bit.

"Yeah..." He replied in a tone that almost made him sound scared.

I feel like this isn't going to end well.

After some more idle chit-chat, their food arrived and was quickly take care of. Once they had finished their meals Celestia announced that she wanted to show Ryan something. Upon this being mentioned Cadence started bouncing with glee. The sun goddess led them down a few hallways before finally finding the door she was looking for. She opened it up and one look is all it took for Ryan to process what was about to happen.

"Why have I not see this!?" Ryan yelled at the mares.

They've had a fucking karaoke room this whole time!?

"What bullshit!?" He continued to scream, digging his fingers into his head as he did so. "Ahhh!"

Cadence and Celestia both flinched at his response. The karaoke room had been here for long time, ever since Cadence was a filly. They used to hang out in here and sing whenever they had some free time. It was a nice way to kick back and have a little fun.

Ryan took a few breaths to clear his mind and settle himself down. Okay, so they had a karaoke room. He would make sure to abuse it later, but right now he was up to have a little fun. "What kind of songs do you have on here."

Celestia shrugged. "Instrumentals, mostly. We used to have so much fun trying to come up with lyrics for each one." She said with a smile, thinking back on all of the good times she had in here.

"Okay..." Ryan began, "I'm not really good at freestyling, but I can give it a shot."

"Aunty," Cadence piped up, flashing everyone an eager smile. "If you wouldn't mind, I would like to go first."

Celestia couldn't help but smile back at her. "Of course, dear."

The young alicorn ran up to the machine and sifted through a few of the instrumentals on it before finding one she liked. "Ryan, if you wouldn't mind, could we possibly do a duet?"

Asking him to do a duet with her wasn't exactly weird, but how she asked was a bit offputting. She sounded almost nervouse for some reason. Deciding to ignore her weirdness, he thought about it for a moment and could only see a thousand plus ways that this could go terribly wrong. "Sure, why not."

Live dangerously and die with a smile.

The mare practically beamed at his agreement. "Wonderful!' She selected the song and turned to face the human. "Since you're the guest, I'll let you start and follow your lead."

Well shit...

His body sunk slightly. "Terrific." He said in an almost dead tone.

Ryan suddenly perked up as a familiar beat started to flow from the machine. He instantly recognized it as a song from his world. It was one he was actually quite fond of. The band that made it was German and they didn't make very many songs in English, but this one was.

The mares noticed his sudden emotional change, seeing how it was a rather positive response, they smiled, knowing that he was getting excited now. Cadence grabbed two microphones, holding one in her right hand and tossing the other to Ryan.

He waited for the right moment to start singing, loosening up his body to make him more comfortable. Once he was nice and loose he pointed a finger to Cadence and started the song in a voice slightly deeper than normal.

"~There's so much wrong in your life.

And you wish you could turn back time.

No time for sorrow, no time to regret.

You're drowning in the sands of time."

Cadence flashed him a smile that almost looked like she was challenging him, that or accepting a challenge. She took a few steps closer to him, catching on to his lyrics and singing in unison with him.

"But life goes on day by day...

And all the faults will remain...

You walk away.

You walk away.

From the place you left before; without me.

There is nothing, that will make you stay."

The two moved closer to each other, getting to the point where their faces were almost touching. Both of them wearing a mixed expression of determination and enjoyment.

"You walk away.

You walk away.

From the place you left before.

You won't go back, 'cause there's nothing more for you to say."

Celestia had no words to describe how well put together this was. It was supposed to be something where ponies would have to come up with lyrics on the spot, but Ryan seemed to be playing it off as if he already knew what the words were supposed to be and the way Cadence was working off of him was simply remarkable.

"You keep all the memories in your heart." Ryan continued, this time alone.

"You know they will keep you from being free.

You walk with the devil deep inside.

As long as you're not able to forget."

Cadence was waiting patiently for where she felt she could join in again. She knew where her place was in the song, she could see it in Ryan's eyes. Something about the way he looked at her was telling her when she should go along with him and when she shouldn't. It was odd how well he was doing. It was almost like he knew what the words were supposed to be.

"But life goes on day by day." She sang with him, seeing that it was time for her to join in.

"And all your faults will remain.

You walk away.

You walk away.

From the place you left before, without me.

There is nothing that will make you stay.

You walk away.

You walk away.

From the place you left before.

You won't go back, 'cause there's nothing more for you to say."

Ryan paused, letting Cadence take the lead now. Singing in the most angelic voice he had ever heard.

"Oh! Oh!

You walk away...You walk away."

There was a brief pause between the two as they eyed each other. As if by clockwork, they both continued as the beat to the song began to pick up.

"You walk away.

You walk away.

From the place you left before, without me.

There is nothing that will make you stay.

You walk away.

You walk away.

From the place you left before.

You won't go back, 'cause there's nothing more for you to say..."

The song ended and they lowered their mics, just staring at each other. They jumped slightly as a one-person applause picked up just a few feet away from them.

Celestia was absolutely awestruck. Her eyes were wide and her mouth was agape. "That was absolutely marvelous."

Cadence looked back at Ryan with a small smile on her face, as well as a blush that she was failing to hide under her mane. He smiled back nervously, rubbing the back of his neck with his free hand. Why was he feeling nervous all of a sudden?

"Thanks, Tia." Ryan said, his eyes strangely never leaving Cadence. They couldn't leave her. It was like he was locked in some sort of trance, one that he wasn't sure he wanted to break free from.

Snap out of it, you fucking tool!

He closed his eyes and shook his head to recollect himself. It worked, for the most part. He wasn't stuck looking at her. However, that plan completely backfired when Cadence placed a hand on his cheek.

"Are you alright, Ryan?" She asked with a horrifying amount of genuine concern. "You're not feeling sick are you?"

He kept his eyes closed, but he could feel her smooth fur gently caressing his cheek and moving up to his head. "You're a bit warm. Maybe you should go lie down." She said in a very peculiar tone.

I don't like this...I don't like it!

Her hand started to wander down until it was resting on Ryan's chest. His eyes shot open and he jumped back just far enough to be out of her reach. "No, I'm fine. I, uh, was just having too much fun I guess."

Get the fuck outta dodge!

He quickly put on a fake smile. "I think I'm going to go take a bath or something to help cool myself down. I'll see you guys later."

Ryan didn't even wait for a response; he walked to the door and closed it behind him before taking off down the hall until he was far enough away that he was sure no pony would hear him.

"You caught that, right?"

Eeyup...We're fucked.

"I am terribly sorry, Cadence." Celestia said, hoping she wouldn't take offense to how Ryan was acting. "He has a tendency to act weird sometimes, but never like this."

"Maybe something is bothering him." She suggested, "If you don't mind, I can stay here for a bit to analyze him and see if there's anything I can do to help."

She smiled at her niece. "You're welcome to stay as long as you like. Just be careful, Luna has been showing signs of a slight jealousy problem. Wouldn't want her getting the wrong idea." She said with a giggle.

Cadence just smiled and waved her comment off. "Don't worry aunty, I'll be fine. Maybe I can even help her out with that problem of hers as well."

"I wish you the best of luck." Celestia stated with a slight bow. "I have some paperwork I need to catch up on, so I'm sorry to say that I must be off for the time being."

"I understand perfectly."

"What do you plan to do for the time being?"

"Not sure yet. I might try to find Ryan, maybe get an early start on figuring out why he's acting weird."

Celestia nodded. "Very well, I'll meet up with you later." With that she was off. She couldn't say she was ready to take on all the paperwork, but it needed to get done.

Cadence stood alone in the hallway, an excited smile spreading her face as she began searching the halls for the human.

Author's Note

Figured I'd get to work on this chapter early. Hope y'all are enjoying, feel free to leave a comment below. Comments make me feel special :P

That being said, have a field day

Forced Affection, Love Ejection

This was a good idea.

Ryan hummed in approval at his brains comment. Deciding to relax in the royal bath house was a great idea and he was loving every second of it. The room was very large, white, and decorated with a number of statues. In the center was the largest bath tub/Jacuzzi thing he had ever seen. The water was heated to a tolerable one hundred and fifteen degrees and all that was left was for him to reach the highest peak of relaxation.

The heat of the water caused his skin to become red on contact, but he didn't mind. It was soothing and very calming to the nerves. What had happened earlier that day was just plain weird. He had the strangest feeling when he had locked eyes with Cadence, but now that he was away from her he felt perfectly normal.

Fucking unicorn voodoo.

"Ponies are weird." He muttered to no one. "But, I guess it's alright with Luna. I Love her the way she is and I wouldn't change it for anything in the world."

You got some crackers to go with that cheese?

"Fuck you!" Ryan started ignoring his own mental processes and reached over to his side, grabbing one of the wine bottles he had brought with him. They were very gentle on the taste buds, but still pretty strong. He didn't exactly remember how he came to possess so many, but he wasn't going to complain about it either.

He reached into his pants, which were sitting just outside of the tub, and pulled out a small pocket knife with multiple smaller attachments. One of these attachments happened to be a cork screw. He twisted the screw into the top of the bottle and pulled out the cork. With that done, he tossed the tool aside and took a small swig from the bottle.

Mmm, fruity...

He swallowed down the sweet liquor and held the bottle just in front of his face. The label read, Berry Delight. Seemed fitting enough. With his curiosity now sated he took another drink and set the bottle aside for now, letting his body sink deeper into the water.

"Mind if I join you?" A soft, feminine voice spoke from the doorway to the bath house.

Ryan jumped, not really expecting any sort of company for the rest of the night. "What the hell are you doing here?" He asked in a somewhat hostile tone. Cadence may be pretty, but whatever happened earlier was very weird and he blamed her completely. Something about her just didn't feel right and the thing he kept buried deep within the depths of his mind was practically growling at the very sight of her.

Cadence didn't seem to mind his aggressive tone and continued to make her way over to the bath. Once she was over she started looking around the water, mostly around Ryan. "You were acting a bit odd earlier. I thought I should come and check up on you."

Good thing we added the bubbles, bitch is trying to sneak a peak!

"Well I'm just fine, as you can see. So you can leave now." He said, leaning his head back to continue his quest of relaxing. When he notice that she hadn't even moved an inch he looked back up at her and started waving her off. "Go on, shoo."

She flashed him an odd grin as he tried to convince her to leave. "Come on, Ryan. You and I both know that you felt something earlier while we were singing together."

He turned away from her, his face starting to turn red with anger. Something about this mare was quickly triggering him and if she didn't leave soon he doesn't know what could happen. "You have ten seconds to get the hell away from me."

Cadence just laughed off his reaction. The way some would deal with emotional stress was always interesting. He seemed to respond aggressively, maybe she could help relieve some of that stress.

The mare started slipping off her clothes and tossing them aside. She tried to make a small show out of it, but the human's attention was more focused on a wall in the exact opposite direction. A shame, but she would make due with what she had.

Ryan felt the water stir slightly, which was a bit weird to him. He hardly moved even slightly enough for it to ripple the way it did. He was about to turn around when he felt a pair of soft hands on his shoulders, ones that seemed to be trying to massage him. His body started to tense up at this. He never understood why people enjoyed massages so much, granted he was very good at them, but they always caused him more pain than anything else.

"Get your god damn hands off of me; while I'm still being civil."

She paid no mind to his increased tension, nor his hostility. This was merely a false self-defense mechanism, she could tell. Being the princess of love she could see these kinds of things in a person. Ryan may be a bit violent sometimes, but he would never do anything to hurt another pony. It just wasn't part of who he was.

Ryan's anger was starting to hit a boiling point, if it went any further then it would spiral. He needed to do something to scare this mare away. His eyes locked onto the bottles just a few inches from him. He reached out and grabbed one, quickly spinning around and going to swing it at her.

The plan was for him to stop just inches from her head, just something to help prove a point. Before he could even get close to his mark though, her hand reached up and caught him by the wrist.

"Oh, please." She said with a dominant tone. "You and I both know you weren't actually going to hit me with that. You can play the bad boy role all you want, but you're not a bad person, no matter how much you want to be."

Cadence started leaning in to him, pressing her naked body against his while pushing back on the arm he had the bottle wielded in. Using her free hand she grabbed his other arm and brought it to her chest.

"Come on, I know that you've been stressed lately, I can see it in your eyes." She said in a voice so sultry that it would make God bend to her will. "Let me take all of that tension away."

Hey, buddy. Hey! Why aren't you responding?

...

Hello!

Deep in the depths of Ryan's mind, his consciousness could hear the sound of chains rattling. At one point, he could have sworn he even heard one break.

Shit, fuck!

Luna had spent most of her time laying down and relaxing, but that came to a rather annoying end. She couldn't seem shake off this strange feeling of dread that was filling her. It was like something bad was going to happen, but she couldn't figure out what.

Luna...

Her head was buzzing around with a thousand different thoughts per second. What could possibly be going on that is upsetting her so much. Maybe Celestia was right about having her sit out today. Perhaps what she needed was some rest.

Luna!

The lunar princess laid herself down on the bed, letting her head sink into the pillows to drown out the rest of the world. She really wished Ryan were here with her. He would definitely be able to-

BITCH!!!

She shot up from the bed upon hearing an odd yelling from within her mind. The voice was oddly familiar. It almost sounded like Ryan was calling out to her. "Hello?"

Bath house, Cadence, him-uh-me...Fuck! We're about to be raped and Ryan is going to lose his shit!

Cadence was beginning to close the gap between them, her eyes half lidded as she leaned in to kiss him. She stopped though when he started twitching, his body tensing up, and his features becoming pale. Her eyes opened back to their normal position in time to see this happening. The white in his eyes became blood shot, almost to the point where his blood vessels should have rightfully popped.

Ryan's grip on the bottle tightened until it shattered in his hand, leaving broken shards of glass to dig into his balled up fist. He started pushing against her, making her back up into the edge of the bath.

The princesses expression started to shift from dominant to fearful. She was an alicorn, her physical strength should have been enough to keep him held in place, but now she was up against a wall with him looming over her.

His fist opened up, revealing his glass-riddled/blood-soaked hand before pulling out of her grip and grabbing on to her wrist. The glass in his hand tore through her skin, causing her to yelp in pain, his tightening grip making the painful sensation much more enhanced.

Before he had to chance to continue his assault on the mare who was trying to force herself on him, the bath house door was opened once again, this time much more aggressively.

Ryan's body was grabbed by an unseen force and pushed to the other side of the tub where he was held in place, flailing around and screaming like some sort of wild animal.

His grip stayed tight on Cadence when he was shoved back, causing his hand to glide down her arm and leave multiple gashes in the appendage. She cried out as her arm was sliced, grabbing it as she jumped out of the tub. She was going to make a run for it, but found herself standing before one of her aunts.

Luna stared down at Cadence with daggers in her eyes. "What the actual fuck do you think you are doing, niece!?"

Cadence flinched at her aunt's words. She had never heard her speak that way before, especially directed at her. "I was just-I wanted to-"

"Do you realize what he could have done to you!?" She shouted, grabbing Cadence's arm and holding it up. "You're lucky this was all that happened."

"I didn't think he was actually capable of-"

"Well, he is!" Luna paused, panting slightly. "Let me get something perfectly clear. Ryan, is my mate and mine alone. I love him and he loves me." She shoved Cadence's torn arm back to her side.

"Our bond is too strong for another to steal him from me. Even attempting would be a death wish." Luna continued explaining to her niece. "I told you before; there is a part of him that should never see the light of day and your actions nearly drew him out. I am the only one that can calm this beast. It wants me and me alone. I fully intend to keep it that way. Understood?"

Cadence's ears dropped and her head sank. "I understand."

"Very well then." Luna huffed, "Now grab your belongings, fix yourself up, and leave. I am very disappointed in you Cadence."

Cadence nodded and teleported away, her clothes vanishing with her as she made her departure.

With her out of the way, Luna could now deal with the raging human still thrashing about in the tub. She made her way over to his struggling form, moving slowly. She loved Ryan more than anything in the world and she trusted him with her life. But in all honesty, she didn't know what to think about him while he was like this.

Ryan watched as the mare moved closer to him. His anger seeming to dissipate a little bit more with every step she took. By the time she had made it over to him, his mind had settled from a small rampage to just minor irritation.

The bloodshot look in his eyes slowly began to recede and color was starting to return to his skin. The human looked down at his hand, quickly taking notice of the shattered glass imbedded in his skin.

He pursed his lips a bit as he eyed the wound, quickly realizing just how much it hurt to have tiny shards of glass digging into your body. "Hmm...well shit." He said in his normal, somewhat joke-like tone.

Luna couldn't help but to smile upon hearing him beginning to speak like his normal self. She quickly stretched out her arms and grabbed him, pulling him into a hug, one in which he was facing the other direction and flailing a bit.

"Halp! RAPE!!!"

She smiled and kissed Ryan's cheek, causing him to blush lightly and stop flailing around like some sort of lunatic. Instead he just smiled and spun himself around so he could return her embrace; while also making sure to keep his weaponized hand from touching her.

Luna pulled away, her smile dropping to a frown as she looked him over and spotted his wound. "I'm sorry, Ryan. I should have been here. This never would have happened if I had just stayed near you."

Ryan raised a brow at her. "Seriously? You're going to blame yourself for this?"

Luna looked genuinely sad, she really was blaming herself for this. "Yes, if I had just-" She fell silent as Ryan placed his good hand against her muzzle, giving her an almost reprimanding look.

"Sweetheart, not only is it NOT your responsibility to watch over me," He began, his joking nature vanishing completely as he spoke, "but this was no where near your fault."

"But, I-"

"No buts! This was not your doing; this happened because your niece is kind of a freak." He was completely surprised with how Cadence acted toward him. He knew from the start that he couldn't trust her, but never expected anything like this. "Now, before anything else, can we fix my fucking hand?"

Please! It feels like tiny knives are trying to work their way into my tendons!

She nodded, taking his injured hand into her palms. Her horn started to glow, as it did the broken shards of glass were levitated out of his skin and into a nearby bin. Once they were gone she started using a healing spell that quickly sealed up the small holes left in the glass' wake.

Ryan pulled his hand back and examined it, flexing his fingers to ensure his mobility. Everything seemed to be working properly. His eyes wandered over to Luna, who still had an upset look about her. He couldn't allow this, for her to be upset about something that was completely out of her power.

He reached up and grabbed her arm, quickly earning her attention, before promptly pulling her into the bath. She fell in with a loud splash and resurfaced not even a second later. Her entire body, as well as her clothes, were completely soaked now.

Luna looked over to Ryan, ready to verbally tear him a new ass for this little joke of his. Before she could even get a word out, he was upon her, his lips pressing into hers. Like placing ice in an oven, her anger melted away into nothing; evaporating into a steaming passion as they shared their oral embrace, soon opening their mouths to welcome the others tongue.

Ryan ran his hands along her body. She may have still been clothed, but he could still feel her soft toned figure beneath. He pressed her up against the edge of the tub, sliding his hands along her front as he started to work on pulling the sopping wet clothing from her body.

She was more than happy to let him strip her as they made out, her soon getting adventurous enough to slide her hands across his thighs and onto his already hardened member. She slid her fingers across the under side of his cock to tease him.

He could definitely feel what she was doing to him and sadly it was working. His anticipation was already through the roof, but if this was the game she wanted to play then he would play it right back. Once he had her fully stripped down to nothing he slid one of his hands in between her thick muscular thighs, soon finding her special little button and pinching it between his index and middle fingers.

Luna gasped, instinctively throwing her arms up and wrapping them around his neck. If spending a week at a thestral training ground with no way to relive herself wasn't bad enough, she had also had the female equivalent of being blue-balled last night, leaving her body more than just a little sensitive.

He continued to assault her clit with his fingers, rubbing and pressing against it with gusto, leaving Luna locked in a state of pleasure that she couldn't describe. However, it wasn't enough. She wanted more, she needed more!

"Ryan, please..." She begged, "I can't handle any more foreplay, just put it in."

"I'm sorry," He said with a devious smirk, "but I didn't quite understand what you said. Would you mind elaborating?"

Luna felt one of his fingers curl up and just barely force it's way into her entrance, causing her to wince. "God dammit!" She practically screamed. "Fuck me! Please, I can't take it anymore!"

"That's my girl!" Ryan removed his hand from between her and grabbed her legs, pulling them apart and lifting her up high enough for him to align himself with her slick entrance. Hot baths are a hell of a thing. He let her body drop down slightly, the head of his dick forcing its way into her. They both hummed in approval; hums soon turning into moans as he slowly hilted himself inside of her.

"Finally..." Luna whispered, her hips beginning to rock themselves back and forth; trying to force him further into her.

It didn't take much more to tell him that, at this moment, he had a job to do and he had no problem in doing that job until his body dropped. With that in mind he began thrusting into her, starting with slow and deep thrusts. Each one caused her breasts to bounce arousingly and would earn him a soft moan from the alicorn goddess.

"Harder..." She whispered into his ear, followed by planting a few soft kisses up his neck. "Please, go harder."

Ryan nodded, "As you wish, Princess." He replied, nibbling her ear for a split second before picking up his speed and adding a little extra force.

Luna gasped at this, her legs wrapping around him as he fucked her. They could have sworn that the water was getting hotter at this point, but then again that could have also been due to a number of different reasons...most of them being due to the-

Ow! She bit me!

With Ryan's increased pace, Luna was doing everything she could to keep herself at least relatively quiet. After all, they were in the royal bath house and not their room. She eventually found the only solution being to bite down on her mate's shoulder.

No matter how hard she bit, she couldn't stop herself from letting out an occasional squeak, and even a few grunts here and there. The pain she was causing the human though only seemed to fuel his lust, causing him to stop thrusting and start slamming into her.

In a matter of minutes Luna was already screaming out in ecstasy. "I'm...I'm gonna-AH...I'm gonna cum!" She yelled into his ear, her walls beginning to tighten around him until she finally let out a guttural moan and her body started to sink into his.

Ryan stopped thrusting and settled with holding her, letting her rest in his arms with his still hard dick pulsing inside of her. He looked down at her and smiled.

Damn, how did a guy like you manage to get a woman as amazing and as gorgeous as her?

Luna shifted a bit, noticing something a bit odd. She reluctantly lifted her head and looked up at her mate, who was still smiling down at her. She looked tired, but for some reason, he didn't. "Ryan...did you not...?"

He nodded, "Nope."

Her eyes widened at this. She finished, but he didn't. That just wasn't even right, not only that, but it wasn't even fair. The lunar mare sat herself up and wrapped her arms around him tight. "Keep going then."

"What?"

"You heard me. Keep going until you are satisfied."

He couldn't help but laugh a bit at her reaction. "Luna, it's fine. I still love you and I had fun. Don't think that-Holy shit!"

Luna quickly rose to her feet, picking Ryan up in her arms and laying him down on the cold floor so she could straddle him. He struggled a bit at first, but he was immediately won over as she started grinding on him, rubbing her labia across his entire length.

He let out a few muffled moans before finally submitting. "Okay, go ahead. I'll allow this."

She smiled and raised herself up, grabbing on to Ryan's cock and positioning it into her moist slit. Once he was lined up with her, she let her body drop hard. The two moaned loudly at the electricity of pleasure this caused them to feel and before long Luna was bouncing up and down, riding Ryan like a hairless horse.

Ryan was practically hypnotized with her movements, every time she would impale herself on him her breasts would bounce around wildly. He reached up, grabbing one in each hand and started massaging them with his fingers. It wasn't soft either, it was rough. Like digging your hands into a tub of play dough as a child.

If only Luna knew of the mental comparison you just did between her breasts and child's toy.

Even if she did, she wouldn't be able to react much to it at all. Her mind was lost in a state of euphoria. Her sensitivity didn't vanish when she had hit her peak earlier, in fact, it felt much stronger. She could already feel her oncoming orgasm building up in the pit of her gut. She was about to explode already. It was actually starting to scare her with how fast he could throw her over the edge.

"I'm gonna...cum again..." She said breathlessly. "Are you...close?"

Ryan nodded, confirming that he was indeed about to burst. His mind stayed focused on fondling her massive chest, while his body had instinctively started spearing her, thrusting deeper into her on its own accord. He could feel her walls already clamping down on his shaft, making the feeling so much more intense.

"Oh! Here it-" Luna didn't even get to finish what she was saying as her pussy unloaded a wave of juices onto Ryan's waistline. In return, she could feel Ryan's dick finally unload the large wave of semen it had been holding back into her. The warm feeling it filled her with was all she needed. They were even now.

Her body collapsed onto him, she was officially done for the night. She looked up to him with her eyes nearly lidded shut. "There...even" She said as her body began to shut down and her head fell into his chest.

Ryan just laughed before grabbing her and picking her up. "Come on, sweetheart. Let's get you to bed."

"How are you not tired?" She asked with genuine surprise.

"I'm me, that's how."

Stamina for days!

Author's Note

I had to make a chapter that was at least semi-serious, so this was it. I also just felt like including the small sex scene just for shits and giggles. Wasn't really looking to do anything big with it. That being said, I still hope you guys enjoyed and maybe got a few laughs out of it.

I kind of pulled the title out of my ass, couldn't really come up with anything that seemed fitting. So bear with me on that bullshit.

Feel free to leave a comment below. As I've said before, comments make me feel special. I'll see y'all in the next chapter, adios. :P

Hooked On A Feeling

Luna collapsed on to her bed. Court had been the very definition of a long day. Hours upon hours of sitting around and listening to the snobby nobles complain about such pointless garbage has left her both exhausted and annoyed. But that part of her day was over and now she could kick back and relax.

She would prefer to partake in such spoils with her mate, Ryan. Laying in bed beside him and snuggling up to his hairless form. It sounded absolutely wonderful to her right now. But, alas, he was not here.

The reason being because he was simply getting bored of just sitting around waiting for court to end so he would have something to do. So he came up with a few ideas on how to keep himself busy. Then the day came when he finally found a way to keep himself preoccupied long enough for court to end, and even give himself a little something in return.

In short, he got a job. Small-time construction, mostly just a few minor repairs on the homes of the lazy nobles. He had requested this job from Celestia several days ago and explained that, back in his world, he was taught how to do a number of repairs and even build small structures much like the ones in Ponyville. Minus the hay for rooftops thing...And the houses that appeared to be made of candy.

Celestia agreed to give him a job in construction and he was on his merry little way to being an honest worker again. The work was taxing and slowed him down a bit throughout the days, but it kept him from being pent up in the castle, being bored for hours on end, and allowed him to go out and meet new ponies.

The ponies at the jobsites were not only interested in him and what he was, but also his relationship. Rumors about Luna finally finding a suitor was spreading faster than herpes. Almost everypony had heard and they were starting to ask questions. With him finally being out and about, these questions instantly became directed at him.

At this very moment, Ryan sat on top of a building in Canterlot, surrounded by a small group of stallions. They were asking questions like; whether the rumors were true or not, if he came from a far away world, and yada-yada-yada. This would go on for hours almost every day. It didn't matter if he was working, or in the bathroom trying to take a piss. They were always there trying to pick his brain for information.

Luckily for him, the work day was coming to an end. Soon enough he'd be able to stop answering the same questions over and over again and be able to head back home to his gorgeous marefriend. Right now, all he wanted was to curl up in bed with her and snuggle the day away. He knew that sounded cheesy, but he was content with the idea and fully intended to make it happen.

"Alright, slackers!" A firm and powerful voice yelled from the ground below. Rusty Nails, was his name. He was Ryan's new boss. Despite being kind of an ass, he was a good stallion. All he really wanted from his workers was loyalty, dedication, and a willingness to work. As long as the job got done and was done right, he was happy. "Pack up, it's time to head out!"

Ryan hopped up from his spot on the roof and made his way down a tall ladder, being careful not to let anything drop from his tool belt. His body was covered in dirt, debris, and sweat. Lots and lots of sweat.

This didn't bother him though. Being able to go out and do something always gave him a certain feeling of satisfaction. Like he actually did something good for the world and he wasn't just some waste of space.

It's nice to know you serve a purpose.

Just as Ryan was about to start walking back to the castle, he heard a strange noise coming from behind him. He turned around and saw nothing but a simple bush. It rustled a couple of times, telling him that there was something hiding in it.

If this isn't the most obvious set-up, I don't know what is. We've seen enough horror films to know exactly where this is gonna go.

Knowing that walking over there was likely what somepony wanted him to do, he simply shrugged it off and continued making his way back to the castle.

Before he could even take more than a few steps he felt a light stinging in his arm. His eye lids became heavy and trying to continue walking was almost as hard as lifting a car with your bare hands. He looked around, but saw that everypony was already gone, no one was there to help him.

Seeing no pony around he drowsily investigated the stinging, poking sensation in his arm, finding what looked like some kind of dart sticking out of it. "You've gotta be...ffffuuckin...kidding...mrrr."

Ryan's body collapsed to the ground with a light thud.

Luna continued to lay in bed, awaiting her mate's arrival. After some time had passed she decided that after a log day of work the both of them could use a little bit of relief. She got up out of the bed and after a bit of searching she managed to find a black, see-through, night gown and removed all of her clothing so she would be wearing nothing but that.

She walked over to look over herself in a nearby mirror, analyzing all of her curves that could be seen almost perfectly through the thin material. Just looking over herself was making her excited. The way the gown hung loosely over her body, how her large breasts caused the chest region to bulge out some with her nipples forming small pointed ends at the tip. The way her thighs would shake whenever she swayed her hips was almost hypnotizing, causing her to do it several times.

The show she was putting on for herself soon came to a grinding halt as she felt a sudden shiver run down her spine. Something was wrong; something was very, very wrong. Thoughts of Ryan began to flood her mind, and not in the way she would have liked just moments ago.

She closed her eyes, trying to focus on nothing but him, using her thoughts to try and communicate with him.

Ryan? Ryan, are you there?

She received no reply, leading her to assume that he was unconscious. That was the only time he wouldn't respond to her mentally calling out to him. With that being the case, she should be able to track him. She focused even harder, wanting to find him as soon as possible. However, she could not get an exact location. This must mean that he's moving. But how could he be moving if he's...

"SISTER!"

Oh my God...Don't throw up, don't throw up, don't throw up...

Ryan's eyes just barely opened enough to register that he was sitting in a chair before he turned his head to the side and began emptying his stomach contents onto the floor beneath him.

Fucking Hell!

He lifted his head up, doing his best to ignore the pain that became ever-so present in his gut. It was almost like that night he spent at his friend Don's place. Everything started off fine and dandy; there was topless women, soda, liquor, everything you needed to have a good time.

Unfortunately for Ryan, that was the day he found out that his body REALLY hates vodka.

One bottle was shared amongst everyone there, but no one had the guts to even get started on the second one. To him, that was a challenge. So he popped off the lid and chugged it until there was nothing left. This stupid decision led to a night of laughing, crying, burying his face between some girl's thighs, then eventually passing out on the floor and waking up naked in the bathtub.

I still remember the taste. Never again will anything that is salted caramel apple flavored ever touch our lips...EVER!

Snapping himself out of his own thoughts, Ryan looked up to see that he was in a very dark room with dim green lighting in every other spot. That was the first thing he noticed, the second thing was a pair of glowing green eyes staring directly at him. He started to struggle, leading him to discover one more thing. He wasn't just sitting in a chair, he was tied to it.

Son of a whore!

"Don't bother struggling." An odd feminine voice spoke out from the darkness. Likely coming from whatever was watching him right now. The voice itself was weird though, like two people were talking at the same time, almost perfectly in sync. "You'll never be able to break out of those bonds."

The green eyes that watched him moved closer and a light picked up from atop of its head. Standing before him was a tall black mare, if you could even call her that. She looked like she was some kind of humanoid bug, what with the rough looking skin, the almost bee-like wings, and...

She has holes...all over her body...that is fucking hilarious.

Ryan could help but snort as he looked her over. Her body was actually rather attractive. Large breasts, slim stomach, large waist, likely to accompany a pretty nice ass. But, the idea of her having random holes in her limbs was simply too amusing for him to not find it funny.

Bet money she's had at least one guy in every hole on her body.

He couldn't hold it back any longer, Ryan started busting out laughing, causing the mystery mare to flinch in confusion. She couldn't understand why he was laughing. Usually when something looks at her it becomes terrified beyond all belief. But, this thing was laughing at her!

Her expression turned sour and she leaned closer to the human, so close that her muzzle was nearly pressed up against his nose. "Silence, you cur!"

"I-I cant!' He said between laughs while struggling to breathe. "It's just too much!"

She pulled herself back and growled at him as his laughing fit started to calm down.

"Okay! Okay...mhm..." He coughed to clear his throat, an amused smile still plastered across his face. "I'm sorry. Where are my manners? What's your name, sweetheart?"

She raised a brow at him. Even now, he doesn't seem the slightest bit frightened by her appearance. In fact, he looks like he just walked out of a theater after seeing the funniest comedy act known to ponies. "My name is Queen Chrysalis. I am queen of the-"

Guess that explains why she looks like a giant bug.

The queen's words were interrupted as the human started laughing...again. What was it that he found so amusing about her. "What is it now?" She asked in an annoyed fashion.

Ryan didn't reply, he couldn't. Instead he continued busting out in guffaw while stomping his feet as best as he could. Before too long, the so-called Queen delivered a rather painful punch to his jaw.

Luna started rubbing at a spot on her chin that was beginning to feel a bit sore. If she weren't so focused on developing different strategies and tactics to the guards on how to rescue her mate, she would have sworn that somepony had come up and flicked her really hard.

She rose from her seat and approached the commander of her guard, a thestral by the name Shadow Beam. "How's the plan coming along commander?"

Shadow rose up from his seat as she approached and bowed. "It's coming, Princess." He said, raising to a full standing position. "I believe I have come up with a plan that should get us in and out with minimal casualties."

Luna nodded, but there was something else here, there always is. No good plan comes without some sort of downfall. "What's the catch?" She asked, looking to skip passed all of the bullshit so he could get right to the point.

A drop of sweat worked its way down his stoic face, showing just how nervous he really was with the information he was about to pass. "Well, in order to do this right. We would have to move slowly, your highness."

She glared at him, urging him to explain himself with her eyes.

He choked slightly before speaking. "W-we want to do everything we can to bring Prince Ryan back safely, so we must be subtle in our pursuit. Which means we would have to drag out our approach as to not be discovered."

"For how long?" Her voice was filled with venom as she asked this, leaning closer to her commander.

"Um-uh..a couple...of...days..."

The room seemed to grow much colder as he said this. Luna's eyes stared directly into his; one of them twitching, which only succeeded in frightening him further.

Ryan managed to bounce back quickly from that last hit, but something told him that there was no way in hell he was walking away from this without a black eye.

Girl's got one hell of a hook.

After hitting him the first time, the queen began questioning him about all kinds of things, mostly about Canterlot. The questions consisted of the status of the guards, their defenses, and any change in structure to the city. The only thing he really knew about any of this were a few select buildings that he had worked on. Everything else was just going in one ear and out of the other.

He didn't know anything about Canterlot's defenses and the only thing he knew about the guards was that they stood as still a statues. The only time he would see them move was when they blinked and even that was a rarity. It was actually kind of creepy. They kind of reminded him of mannequins.

Honestly, Ryan had a huge disliking for mannequins. He always felt like any one of them could be a real person just playing themselves off as some sort of beauty prop.

As time passed, more unanswerable questions were asked, more punches were thrown, and more laughs escaped Ryan's lips than anything else.

Before too long, Chrysalis became fed up and left, abandoning him in the dark crypt of a room.

The queen growled as she made her way back to her chambers. "What could that crazy princess possibly see in a buffoon like him!?" She asked no one in particular, mostly just speaking to herself. "He's clearly an idiot; he's lived there for months and doesn't know a single thing about it!"

She kicked open her doors out of anger and took a seat on her bed, angrily! "How can something be so dense!? His only good quality is that pretty face he has and now it's a bleeding mess!"

She paused to take a breath before letting her body fall down onto the bed. "No matter, everything shall go according to plan." She babbled on to herself. "The princess will come looking for her little boy-toy and we will be ready to apprehend her. After that, nothing can stand in my way."

Ryan sat in relative silence, still bound to the chair. Not much else could be said. He was stuck and really had no way of getting out. All he could do now was listen to his own thoughts.

So, let's recap! She asked us questions about stuff we don't know, beat us harder than a limp dick, then stormed off all pissy cause that's just how queens are.

"Yep, pretty much."

We've taken worse, this aint shit.

"Mhm." He hummed, actually sounding rather unphased by everything that had just transpired.

Well, since we're stuck here we might as well have a little fun.

"How do you suppose we do that?"

I have a few ideas.

Two changeling guards stood outside of the room where Princess Luna's mate was being kept locked up. Their queen had demanded that they make sure he does not escape. The only ones allowed to enter would be her and the occasional changeling to hose him down and feed him so he wouldn't die, nor smell like a barn animal.

Things were pretty quiet once their queen left to go back to her room, but that ended quicker than they expected as the creature behind the door began chanting something very odd. It's voice echoing through the halls.

"Ooga chaka, ooga, ooga, ooga chaka. Ooga, ooga, ooga chaka. Ooga, ooga, ooga chaka. Ooga, ooga, ooga chaka."

They both looked toward the door, occasionally glancing at each other with a questioning gaze. Neither of them knew what was happening. Was it calling for help? Getting ready to cast a spell? Summoning an ancient evil?

"I, I'm hooked on a feeling!

I'm high on believing!

That you're in love with me!

I'm hooked on a feeling!

And I'm high on believin'

that you're in love with me!

Said I'm hooked on a feeling!

And I'm high on believin'

that you're in love with me!"

The two guards groaned in unison, knowing that whatever this thing was, it was not panning on being pleasant. It's obnoxious yelling/singing was already giving them a headache. It shouldn't last too long though, it's gotta get tired at some point, right?

4 Hours Later

"`You and me, baby, aint nothing but mammals!

So let's do it like they do on the discovery channel!

Do it again now.

You and me, baby, aint nothing but mammals!

So let's do it like they do on the discovery channel!

GETTIN HORNY NOW!

Bada, bum, buda, nana, nana! Buda, bum, buda, nana, nana!"

The guards were practically bleeding out of their ears as the creature continued to assault their brains with it's never ending list of songs. Each one becoming either more obnoxious, annoying, or just plain dirty than the last.

One of them finally snapped at. "Will you shut up!"

"Hey, fuck you!" Ryan screamed back at them.

A smaller female changeling approached the guards, carrying a silver platter with fresh fruit on it in her hands. "Um, excuse me." She shyly spoke, earning the guards' attention. "I'm here to feed the human..."

The guards nodded and allowed her entry, using their magic to open the door for the small changeling.

She walked in, nearly jumping at her own shadow as she made her way to the tied up creature sitting just a few feet from her. "Hello...I'm Silver. I'll be feeding you today sir..."

Ryan stared awkwardly at, what he could only assume was a child. She walked closer to him and grabbed an apple from the tray she was holding and held it out in front of his face.

"So...Silver, right?" He asked, taking a bite out of the apple. It wasn't that bad actually. He was assuming that the fruit was drugged but, seeing how he wasn't passing out, his assumption was wrong. Thank God.

She nodded, keeping her arm held out so he could eat. "Yes, I'm supposed to come here and feed you so you won't starve."

This was very odd for Silver. She usually felt so inferior around others, but for some reason she didn't feel that around this creature. Something about him seemed different; it seemed nice.

"Nice to meet ya." He said with his mouth full before swallowing. "I'm Ryan, Princess Luna's boyfriend."

"I-I heard." She replied with a smile. "It must be fun to be dating royalty."

"It's alright. I mean, she can be kind of a bitch sometimes." He chuckled at his own remark and smiled when he saw Silver giggling. "But, she's only like that when she needs to be. And trust me, I give her a thousand different reasons to every day."

Silver couldn't seem to wipe the smile off of her face. She was enjoying talking to Ryan. He was funny, weird looking, but funny. She would have to come down here more often to talk to him.

Author's Note

Sorry for the lateness. Been busy with work and life and such. I hope you all enjoyed the chapter regardless. Feel free to leave a comment below, comments make me feel special. That being said, I'll see you all in the next chapter. Adios!

Songs: Blue Suede- Hooked On A Feeling

Bloodhound Gang- The Bad Touch

Where My Demons Hide

Author's Note

Not gonna lie, this chapter gets a little fucked up. So be aware of that. There's going to be some blood, some disturbing threats, and so on.

Don't say he didn't warn you
That being said...have fun...

Songs used: Bonnie Tyler- I Need A Hero

Nelly Furtado- Promiscuous Girl

Avatar- The Eagle Has Landed

Where My Demons Hide

"~I need a hero!

I'm holding out for a hero, till the end of the night!

He's gotta be strong

and he's gotta be fast

and he's got be larger than life!

LARGER THAN LIFE!!!"

The two changeling guards didn't know how much more they could take. This had been going on for five days now and it was starting to make their ears bleed. You'd think the human being kept locked up would grow tired after the first few times, but no. He would continue to sing for hours upon hours. For days, upon days. It never ended!

"Stop singing!" One of them finally shouted to the obnoxious singer.

"Hey, I wanna go for a walk!" Ryan replied. He was starting to feel very pent up just sitting here and not being allowed to do anything. The first day he was okay, the second he started to get antsy. Now he just wanted to get up and move.

Being stuck in a chair for days with no end has taught him something. First off, he never knew that an ass could get so sore just from sitting. The second thing was that if he ever had to spend the rest of his life in a wheelchair, he'd probably kill himself.

"Come on, let me out! Just for a few minutes." He pleaded, really needing to stretch his legs.

"You can't go for a walk." The same guard answered. If the human would have been less annoying he might have considered it, but his queen wouldn't allow it anyway so it wouldn't matter.

"Come on, Changey. Be a pal. Don't be douche like Shifter over there."

The guards eyed each other at this. Apparently the human didn't just give them random, and somewhat racist, names. But, he also seemed to know that there were two of them out there. Which didn't make sense because the other guard hasn't spoken once.

"Yeah, Shifter! I know you're out there you fucking silent bitch!"

"Gorton!" The changeling that had been dubbed Changey yelled.

"What?"

"My name is Gorton!"

"...Come on, Changey!"

"Dammit, you're not getting out!"

"Why not?"

"Shut up!"

"~Promiscuous girl!

Where ever you are!

I'm all alone

and it's you that I want!"

Gorton was about two seconds from kicking down the door and beating the human with a bat. Luckily, for that annoying creature, he was interrupted from his almost violent outburst by the small changeling who came by to feed him so he wouldn't wither away.

Honestly, he felt like they should have let him die a while ago. Worse than that, the young changeling, Silver, was keeping him in high spirits. Every time she would go in there he would hear them chatting away as if they had known each other for years. They would talk for nearly an hour and laugh about who knows what. In his mind, she was a traitor. For all he knew, she could be giving away secrets to the human and information about the hive.

He nearly growled as she approached the doors before cutting her off with his spear. "Just what do you think you're doing?"

Silver flinched at this. Normally she would be able to just walk right by the guards and they would hardly look at her. So, why the sudden hostility? He knew that this was her job. "I'm going to feed Ryan."

"Oh, so you're on a first name basis now?" He asked, his feelings of anger growing as quickly as his suspicions of her.

"I just...I-um..." She backed away, being able to feel the guards increasing emotions.

Gorton took several step closer to Silver and grabbed her arm, causing her to drop the tray of food she was supposed to be taking to their human prisoner.

Silver let out a pained yelp as the guard's grip on her arm tightened.

Was that Silver?

The sound of rattling chains echoed from deep within Ryan's mind. Like they were being dragged across the floor only to be caught on something.

Is he hurting her?

"Oh, Changey!" He sang, quickly earning the guard's attention.

Gorton turned his head to face the closed doors to their prisoner's room. "What do you want now?" He asked with a thick venom in his voice.

"You better not be hurting my meal carrier..."

The guard grinned. Finally, he had a way to get to that annoying creature. "So what if I am? What does it matter to you?"

"If you hurt her...I will come out there...and I will stick that spear through your fucking leg..."

Gorton's smile grew at this. He already suspected that Silver was a traitor, so it brought him no shame to hurt her. And, knowing that it would bother the human, just made him feel so much more justified.

He turned his head to face Silver again before delivering a hard smack across her face with the end of his spear.

Silver cried out from the hit, a small trickle of green blood oozing out of a small cut on her cheek.

That son of a bitch!

The sound of a single piece of metal snapping in half boomed through his brain, sending a wave of intense rage coursing through his veins. And, in the real world, back in his little room, the sound of ropes being pulled against with great force started to fill his ears.

Outside of the room, Gorton was having a field day as he continued to beat silver with the wooded end of his spear. Her screams quickly filling the dark hallways of the hive. He knew there was no way in all of the Badlands that the human could break free from his bindings. So why stop at just one? If he continued to hurt her, then it would break him down. Maybe it would even get him to stop singing.

It wasn't until he heard something snapping loudly from behind him that he stopped and looked back at the doors. Almost in an instant they were kicked open by a very pissed off looking Ryan with eyes so blood shot it looked like he had just escaped from a burning building.

Ryan stood there, eyeing both Gorton and Silver, his body trembling as he did so.

The other guard, who had kept his post, attempted to stab at the human with his spear. However, the blade was caught in the human's powerful grip.

His hand began dripping blood as he caught the weapon just inches from his chest, the metal digging deep into the flesh on his hand. "I'm gonna make regret ever being hatched you ugly fucking bug."

The guard started to shake in fear as Ryan's eyes locked onto his. Before he could react further the human lunged at him, roaring like a wild animal.

Luna felt a cold shiver run down her spine, followed by a strange tingling sensation in her left hand. She looked down and inspected the appendage, seeing nothing wrong with it. There was no sign of injury, but there was a prominent red mark going across it. Like she had been leaning it up against the edge of a table for too long.

"Your highness." Her commander spoke up, causing her to snap back to reality. "We're nearly to our destination. As my theory had suggested, we were completely unseen. We are ready to infiltrate on your command."

She wore a determined look on her face as she nodded. "Let's go save Ryan."

Ryan looked over what he had done with not even a single ounce of regret filling him. One of the guards laid unconscious on the floor with his body bloody and bruised while Gorton, his primary target, was sitting upright and still conscious. His own spear buried deep into his knee, the blade of the weapon prominently sticking out of the other side of his leg.

He stood over the bastard who had started mercilessly beating Silver with a fire in his eyes, watching as he tried to remove the spear from his own leg.

Gorton looked up at Ryan with hate-filled eyes, still gently pulling at the weapon. The pain was too much for him to bare. He would not be able to get it out without some kind of help.

Ryan wasted no time in leaning down and picking Gorton up by the neck in his right hand. He lifted him into the air and pinned the changeling against a wall, tightening his grip until he could hear him choking.

Keeping his grip tight, he watched as Gorton started to fall unconscious, the light further fading from his eyes with every passing second. Once he was out cold, he started squeezing tighter, making sure that he wasn't going to wake up, ever...

He dropped Gorton's limp body to the ground. With both of the guards out of the way he could focus on something much more important.

Ryan started looking around the area before finding Silver hidden underneath a nearby table. He walked over and crouched down so he could see her. What he saw though made his heart drop. One side of her face was bruised to a dark shade of green with cuts leaking what he could only assume was blood.

Silver stared at him with a certain amount of fear in her eyes. She had just watched him beat one of the guards to a bloody pulp and then kill Gorton. So her judgment on him was a bit fuzzy at the moment.

He could tell she was scared, but he couldn't just sit back and do nothing while they hurt her like that.

Ryan reached a hand out to Silver, his eyes showing her nothing but kindness. "Come on, Silver. It's okay. I'm not gonna hurt you."

Even though she had just watched him commit what was easily the biggest crime in the hive, she still felt as though she could trust him. She could see how much he cared for her in his eyes, and she could feel his emotions seeping into her. Nothing about them read any sort of hostility toward her.

She smiled, this was all she needed to know that he wasn't going to do anything to her. Reaching out, she grabbed his hand and let him lead her from under the table.

Once Silver was out and standing Ryan pulled her into a gentle hug. He was happy that she was alright. Over the past five days of him being a prisoner here, he and Silver had developed a powerful friendship. She came by every day to feed him and take care of him. During her visits they would talk for hours and she always managed to keep him smiling. He learned to trust her and care for her like family.

In his mind, she was family. She was loyal, kept him busy, and did everything she could to keep him from feeling like all hope was lost. She gave him faith that everything would be alright.

He broke the hug and looked over her wounds. They were bad, but not lethal. She might have a nasty scar though. "Are you alright, sweetheart?"

"I am now..." She looked passed him, staring at Gorton's corpse just a few feet from them. "You choked him to death...for me..."

Ryan chuckled. "No, I didn't choke him."

Silver looked up at him with a raised brow. Obviously being slightly confused.

"I strangled that motherfucker."

She couldn't help but giggle at his remark. Then it hit her; her eyes widened upon remembering that she wanted to tell him something when she came to feed him. "Oh! Some Lunar guards were spotted snooping around near the hive. They've found you!"

Ryan threw his arms to the air. "Woo! It's about fucking time."

"Yeah...it is." Silver went quiet. Her features sinking a bit, but keeping a forced smile on her face.

He spotted this quickly and kneeled down to her level. "Hey, what's wrong?"

"It's nothing," She replied, still keeping up her fake smile. "It's just that..." She looked into his eyes, a tear soon falling down her cheek. "I'm gonna miss you."

Ryan cocked his head to the side, a comically confused look plastered across his face. "I'm sorry, did you think you were staying here?"

Her eyes went wide once again after her mind had pieced together what he had just asked her. "What?"

"Come on, you think I'm gonna leave you in this shit-hole with assholes who beat you? Fuck off! You're coming back to Canterlot with me!"

A bright smile stretched across Silver's face before she straight up tackled Ryan to the ground, forcing him into a hug that should be way too tight for someone her size to give.

C-can't...breathe...mrrr

"Okay...kinda need air here..." He managed to choke out.

Silver released Ryan and climbed off of him, allowing him to catch his breath and eventually get back to his feet.

"Such a heart warming moment." A voice spoke from across the room. One that the two instantly recognized as the Queen of the changelings.

Queen Chrysalis stood just opposite of them with her arms crossed, a shit-eating grin spread across her face. "It's too bad that neither of you will live through the night."

Silver started to shake with fear, but calmed down when Ryan walked out in front of her. "That's some big talk from such a little bitch."

The queen rolled her eyes. "That's funny, coming from you at least." She said in a sarcastic tone. "Exactly how much of a fight did you put up while I was torturing you."

"About the same as these two fuckers." He gestured the unconscious and dead guards on the ground.

She shrugged. "I'll admit; I'm impressed that you managed to break free and even take down some of my guards. But that matters little. You cannot stand against a whole army and neither can your precious princess of the night."

Excuse you, bitch?

"Come again?" Ryan's heart started beating faster. The sound of chains rattling around in his brain started to fill his ears once again.

"Your mate, as you call her, has arrived and is currently walking directly into my trap. Soon enough, she'll be apprehended then executed."

Ryan nodded. "Mhm...Tell me, queen. Do you know the difference between choking and strangulation?"

She giggled at his words. Like he would ever be able to get his hands on her. She snapped her fingers and various green eyes began popping up from the surrounding darkness. "I think I'll just have you killed now. Then I'll go after Luna..."

Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit!

"Silver..." Ryan whispered.

"Are we going to die?" She asked shakily.

"No, I won't let you die. That's why I need you to start running."

"B-but..."

"NOW!!!"

In the back of his mind Ryan was sprinting as fast as he could toward the large metal door at the end of the hall. "Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit, shit!"

Once he was close enough, he focused on all of the locks and in a split second they fell to the ground and the door swung open, allowing him immediate access. He ran in and slid across the dark floor as he forced himself to a stop just inches away from the rampaging monster in a blood stained straight jacket.

The darker half of Ryan's mind was in a frenzy, throwing its body around with a vigor that could only be fueled by unbridled rage. It screamed and roared incoherently as it thrashed about, trying to break free of its chains.

The lighter half shushed it at first, but that didn't do anything but become drowned out by it's hollering. "Shut the fuck up, you babbling moron!"

The dark half ceased it's tantrum and started glaring daggers at it's other half.

"Look," He began, taking a breath to calm himself. "you and I both know that this isn't going to end well. That is why I'm here, and that's why I need you to focus."

The darker half's eyes seemed to show a sign of understanding, allowing the lighter half to continue. "I'm going to let you out, but you have to promise me something." The darker half tilted its head slightly. "First, you will not hurt Silver." It growled. "You will not hurt her! You will not hurt her and you will come back here when this is all over."

It started to roar, seeing this so-called agreement to be a little one-sided. "And in exchange..." It paused, wanting to hear what he had to say. "I want you...to kill every other motherfucker you see in here."

It froze for a moment, then smiled. It nodded furiously, a blood curdling smile spread across its face.

He closed his eyes and swallowed, nervously making his way over to the dark half and undoing the belts on the jacket. "Leave no survivors. Just leave Silver alone and the rest are all yours."

He made his way to the last belt, the one that kept his arms bound to his sides. After taking a deep breath he separated the two leather strands from each other and the jacket that once held Ryan's darker half fell to the ground.

It smiled as the implement that had kept him stuck in place for years was finally free from his body. "I'm gonna kill them all. I'm gonna kill their friends and their family. I won't stop. I'll never stop!"

The lighter side took a few step back. "This might not have been a good idea."

A severe pain shot through Ryan's skull, causing him to reach his hands up and burry his fingers into his head. It felt like hundreds of small razors were burrowing their way into him. The sensation sent wave after wave of blood to his brain. He could feel his pulse in his eyes sockets as several blood vessels started to pop, leaving the white in his eyes red as they filled with blood.

The pain passed and he looked up at the group of Changelings surrounding him, as well as the smiling queen.

A disturbing grin graced his features. "I'm gonna kill each and every one of you." He spoke with an unnatural growl in his voice. "I'm gonna rip off your skin, wrap it around my dick, AND FUCK YOUR QUEEN WITH IT!!!"

They recoiled at this and before they knew it, the human was charging at them, screaming like a maniac.

Luna had to take a seat on the floor. Her mind was becoming overwhelmed with images of her mate. In each image he was covered in an odd green liquid, his eyes were blood red, and he always seemed to screaming.

She placed a hand to her head, becoming dizzy from the overabundance of violent pictures in her brain. This must be some kind of sign. She needed to find him and quick.

Several of her lunar guards had stopped to tend to her, but she waved them off and pulled herself back up, continuing their journey deeper into the changeling hive. The lighting was too dim for them to see very far in, so torches were lit and lined up along the walls.

The sound of screaming began to echo through the tunnel-like halls. It sounded like something small, like a child. A short figure appeared in the darkness, becoming clearer as it ran closer to the light.

As it got closer they began to make out its features. It had dark, tough looking skin, long green hair, and bug-like wings. The guards raised their weapons, causing the small changeling to stumble and fall as she tried to stop herself.

"That's one of them." A guard shouted.

Two guards walked over and grabbed the changeling, lifting her into the air by her arms. She didn't fight them, just remained still as they brought her to Luna.

Luna looked down at the changeling. She wanted to appear strong and firm to it, but something about this changeling made her feel strange. Almost like she cared about it. Her toughened look turned motherly as she spoke. "Who are you, little one?"

It took her a moment to realize who was talking to her, but once she realized who it was she unloaded. "Princess Luna!" She nearly yelled. "My name is Silver. Please, you have to help Ryan. They're going to hurt him!"

Luna's eyes narrowed at the changeling. This could be some sort of trap, but they weren't going to be getting anywhere soon unless they had something to go off of. "Who's going to hurt him?"

Before Silver could answer, another form started to appear from the dark. This one was much taller, but had a body that was very similar to the smaller changeling. It appeared to be wounded, if the limping was any indication. Once it was close enough, they easily recognized her by the crown on her head, but not much else.

Chrysalis, queen of the changelings, stumbled toward them. Her body was covered in green blood; a combination of her children's and her own. Her horn was nearly gone, as if it had been snapped off just above the base of her skull.

"Please..." She weakly begged. "Help us...he's killing them. He's killing my children..."

Everypony watched her, frozen, in a state of shock as she made her way over, soon collapsing just inches away from them. She was still alive, but they all wondered what could have possibly happened to her. Then they all heard it. The sound of footsteps making their way over to them, followed by a familiar voice that seemed to be singing as it got closer.

"~Ladies and gentlemen!

You hero has returned again!

Everything is going to be okay-ay-ay-ay!"

Ryan appeared from the shadows, looking just as he did in Luna's visions. His body covered in a thick green substance, his eyes blood red, and filled to the brim with an unquenchable bloodlust.

Luna wanted to charge over, to run in and hug him and love him, but this wasn't Ryan anymore. This was something else entirely. It was horrible, monstrous, and down right evil.

He made his way over to the collapsed queen, gripping her broken horn tightly in his hand. He dragged the tip of it across the wall, making a threatening scratching noise that made everypony turn pale. As if seeing him in this state wasn't enough already.

Once Ryan made it to the queen he leaned down and grabbed her by the hair, pulling on it to force her head up. She screamed...and he laughed, raising the broken horn above his head.

"~Ladies and gentlemen.

Your shepherd and your very best friend.

Bow your head and let us in to stay-ay-ay-ay!"

Just has he brought the horn down, with the intent to shove it straight through her neck, his vision went black and all was silent. The last thing he heard was the screams of a woman he loved more than anything else in the world. She called out to him, begging him to stop. But now, now everything was gone. No more screaming, no more blood. Just nothingness.

Finally he heard something; the rattling of chains, a closing door, the sound of a lock being put in place.

Just one more thing he won't be able to see...

Where My Demons Hide (Part 2)

Ryan awoke in his own bed, much to his surprise. Last time he checked he was trapped in some kind of hive for weird bug-people. Of course, he had no idea how he got here, or even how he got out of being captured. His first assumption was that Luna must have found him while he was asleep. She can track people down when they're asleep, right? Never-the-less, he needed to make sure everything was in order.

"Brain, status report."

I wouldn't recommend moving.

"What?" He asked in confusion, trying to sit himself up. A sudden shockwave of pain surged through his body, causing him to collapse back down to the bed. He couldn't figure out why, but he felt like he had just spent a whole day at the gym. Every muscle in his body was sore and his bones felt like they were about to crumble.

"Shit...What the fuck happened last night?"

It was a hell of a struggle, but you managed to break out of the hive. Wasn't long before Luna found you.

His mind traveled back to the hive again. He could just vaguely remember breaking out of the room they had him in. He remembered beating down the two guards to save...

"Silver!" He yelled, not knowing if she made it out or not.

Calm down, she took off before that group of bug guards showed up.

Ryan couldn't seem to remember much about the group of guards. Them showing up was pretty fuzzy in his mind. After that though, everything just went blank. "What happened?"

You made a valiant effort, good sir...but you got fucked up. They beat you down pretty good, but you managed to bring a good number of them down with you.

"So I'm not a complete bitch."

I wouldn't say that.

The bedroom door opened and Ryan tried to lift his head to see who it was, but his neck was pretty stiff and moving it seemed to hurt more than getting a baseball to the testicle. Not testicles, not both. Only one. Just charging head on right into ol' lefty.

Luna walked over to the bedside, taking a seat on the edge. She was happy to see that he was awake, but she could tell that he was in a great deal of pain. "Good morning, Ryan."

"How's it going mooncheeks?"

She giggled at the nickname he had given her. "I'm certainly doing better than you. How are you feeling?"

"Like I got hit by a bus." He replied nonchalantly, turning his head to face her. She had an odd look about her, like she was staring down at someone who was about to die. "You alright there, sweetheart?"

She nodded, a soft smile spreading across her lips as a single tear ran down her face. "I'm fine, dear. I'm just happy that you're back and you're perfectly healthy."

Luna placed one of her hands on his chest, she could feel the gentle beating of his heart. "I thought I had lost you."

Ryan shot her a cocky smile. "I already told you once; You can't get rid of me that easily."

She sniffed, holding back just how much she was truly hurting. The battle was a long one and it almost resulted in her losing him forever. There was no time for this though, she needed to figure out what was going on in that head of his. "Well I'm glad. And, you have a visitor as well."

His brow raised at her. Who could possibly be here to see him? "A visitor? If it's your sister, then he can go right to hell."

"Don't you mean She?"

"I said what I meant."

Luna snorted and looked towards the door. "Alight then. You may come in now."

The door opened again and Ryan could feel a bit of movement on the bed down by his feet. Before too long a small changeling was hovering over his head. "Hi, Ryan!"

"Silver!" Ignoring the pain in his body he reached out an arm and pulled the little one into a hug. One that she happily returned. "It's so good to see you. I wasn't sure if you made it out or not."

"Of course I did." She said happily. "I had you watching over me."

Gay!

Luna could hear his brain speaking and figured this would be as good a time as any. "I'll be back in a moment. There's something I need to do."

She rose up from the bed and made her way back out to the hallway. Once out she closed the door and took a breath, closing her eyes and focusing on the spell she was about to cast.

When she opened her eyes again she was in a barren wasteland, surrounded by crumbling buildings and destroyed vehicles. There was a layer of thick black clouds above her that roared with thunder and lightning as rain poured down on top of her.

"It's nice isn't it?" A familiar voice picked up from behind her. She turned around to see the mental image of Ryan sitting on top of an old semi-truck, basking in the rain. "To some people an area like this would be considered an eye sore. But, I like it. It's peaceful, empty. The rain just makes it all the better too. How it slides across your skin, sending little tingles through your body. It's like a little slice of heaven."

Luna smiled up at him. Of course he would enjoy something like this. She couldn't blame him though, it was peaceful and the rain was a nice touch. As much as she would love to hang out in here for a while, she needed to figure a few things out. "How much does he remember?"

"Not allot." He replied, hopping down from the truck. "As far as he knows; he got out of the chair, kicked some ass, then got the shit beat out of him."

She nodded. "Will he remember anything else?"

"Not a chance. I made sure of that."

"And what of the beast?"

"Back in his cage where he belongs."

There was a pause between them before Ryan made his way over to Luna. "I know it's hard to understand, but there are some things that are better left forgotten. The guy's got enough memories haunting him for several life times." He stopped once he and Luna were close enough to make out each others eyes. "I just don't want the fucker to suffer any more than he already has."

Luna's gaze dropped to the ground, she couldn't help but think about what had happened when they found him.

Ryan stabbed Chrysalis' own broken horn deep into her throat, leaving a pool of thick green goop to seep out of her neck and onto the floor. When her body had finally stopped convulsing, he looked up at the group of thestrals that stared at him with wide eyes. He started growling like some kind of animal and lunged up at them, fists swinging and teeth bared.

Luna called out to him, begging for him to stop. He wouldn't listen though, he just continued to attack her guards. It didn't take long for them to start fighting back.

She had to grab Ryan in her magical grip to stop him from hurting anypony else. She begged and pleaded with him to calm down, but his mind was too far gone for her words to have any meaning.

Hit him...

Her eyes widened as she heard the voice from within Ryan's mind speaking to her, telling her to hurt him.

You want Ryan back? You wanna put an end to all of this madness? Hit him! Knock him the fuck out!

She closed her eyes and let out a silent apology before punching Ryan directly in the skull, knocking him unconscious the second her fist connected with his head.

"It was a bitch to get that guy back where he needed to be, even with him being dazed from how hard you hit him. We got lucky, I wouldn't have been able to overpower him other wise."

Luna sniffed again, doing her best to hold back her tears. She just couldn't seem to cope with the idea of Ryan being lost from her forever. Seeing him in that state was horrible, but him being that way for the rest of his life...It hurt her, it hurt. It hurt her heart knowing that he could have been stuck that way and there would have been nothing she could do about it.

Ryan could see that she was upset and placed a hand on her cheek, gently guiding her gaze up to him. "Hey, try not to think about it too much. The important thing is; He's back and everything can go back to normal."

She nodded, using one of her arms to wipe the developing tears from her eyes. "You're right. I shouldn't think about it. Ryan is okay and that's all that matters."

"That's the spirit!" He shouted as thunder echoed from above them. "Now get your sexy little ass outta here. You got a man to go see."

Luna smiled, her body becoming covered in a bright blue glow as she removed herself from Ryan's mind. "Thank you..."

He sighed and looked up at the sky, watching the rain as it fell down on to his face. He was going to climb back onto the semi so could continue to enjoy it, but another flash of blue light entered his vision where Luna had been previously standing.

His eyes traveled back to that spot to find a face he was pretty happy to see. "Well, well, well. If it isn't the blue menace herself, Lulu."

The younger looking version of Luna placed a hand on her hip and playfully rolled her eyes at him. "Yeah, whatever cock-bite. Do you wanna insult me or have a little fun in the rain?"

"Don't think I can't do both." He said with a shit-eating grin on his face. "I am quite the multitasker."

Luna opened her eyes to find herself standing back in the hallway just outside of the room she shared with her mate. She could hear him and Silver talking to each other an laughing every so often. Feeling a little nosy, she peeked her head in to listen to what they were saying.

"Really, I don't understand why some clubs and stuff have dress codes." Ryan started explaining. "I mean, do they want me to go in there with a one thousand dollar suit just to get smashed and ruin it?"

Silver started giggling at him as he continued.

"I can't imagine that the guy who made it was just like; I make the finest suit that you wear to the club. You do a jaeger bomb and you spill! Then you puke...Then you do cocaine and you wake up!"

At this pint Silver was rolling around on the bed laughing. She didn't know what a jaeger bomb or cocaine was, but the way he delivered the joke and how he yelled as if he were mad just made it funny to her.

"You grab your girl then she pukes and pees down your back...Not a pleasant experience."

That girl sucked...and she wasn't even good at it.

Silver could hardly breathe as she continued with her giggle fit.

Fuck! Why is she so adorable!?

Luna was doing her best to hold in her laugh before making her way back into the room. "How are you two doing?"

Silver got back up and calmed herself down. "We're fine. Ryan's funny!"

"Yes, yes he is." Luna commented.

"Yes, yes I am." Ryan simply said. Not for ay particular reason. Mostly just to be an asshole. "How you doing over there sexy?"

Luna raised a brow at him. "Are you sure you should be talking like that in front of the child?"

He thought about it for a minute and realized his error. "Right, at this age they're supposed to think that people of the opposite gender are gross. Allow me to rephrase that." He cleared his throat then raised his hand, sticking his thumb up and then turning it upside down. "Boo! Boo! Go away!"

...She is gonna cut you!

Silver collapsed onto the floor, once again entering a ridiculous laughing fit.

Ryan inched his way to the edge of the bed to look down at Silver. "And like that, the bed is all mine again."

Luna rolled her eyes and made her way over to Silver. "Are you alright down there?"

Silver somehow managed to recompose herself and get back to her feet. "I'm fine, it was just funny."

She giggled. "Would you mind giving me and Ryan a few minutes to talk?"

"Not at all." Silver said with a smile before making her way out of the room, leaving Luna and Ryan to be alone together.

Luna walked over to the bed and took her spot on the side again, sitting right on the edge and looking over her mate. She could still see a good amount of red in his eyes, but it was clearing up nicely.

He looked back up at her, slightly confused. "So...is there any reason in particular that you wanted us to be alone? Am I going to be raped?"

The princess laughed. "No, I just felt like being alone with you." She continued to look down at him, her eyes speaking a thousand phrases of her love for him. She leaned down and kissed his forehead. "You should get some rest. You still have a bit of healing up to do."

Ryan took a deep breath. "Yeah, you're probably right. Mind giving me a little help with that. I'm not exactly tired."

"Of course." Luna's horn started glowing and in an instant Ryan's eyes started to become heavy. Before he knew it he was asleep with Luna just looking at him with caring eyes. "Good night, love. Sweet dreams."

Author's Note

Yes, this chapter is a bit shorter than the rest. I just kind of felt the need to make a small filler to keep everyone at ease and fill you all in on what had happened, while also making this slightly more comedic and hopefully a little heart warming and cute.
Regardless of how it came out, I hope you all enjoyed it. Feel free to leave a comment below, comments make me feel special. And I will see you all in the next chapter.
Adios.

Happy...

"Ryan, are you sure you should be doing this? I'm not sure it's a good idea," Silver suggested with a worrisome voice.

"I'vvvve...never been more sure about anything in my entire life. Today is the day...that Imma...I'm gonna...beat this ashhole!" Ryan replied with a bit of a slur.

We...were...we're gonna win this...this time!

Discord, the master of chaos himself, merely chuckled at the human's words.

Originally, after recovering from what Ryan was told was the beat down of the century, he was going to just kick back and relax. That was until the oddly dressed, humanoid...thing, known as Discord, challenged him to a rematch for their drinking game. Silver just so happened to stumble upon the two as they were discussing the matter of the rematch and insisted on keeping the human company.

The first few shots were pretty alright, Ryan didn't seem to change much at all. Around the seventh or eighth though, he started acting funny. He would have a hard time speaking full sentences without some kind of error. Then around the twelfth or thirteenth shot his head started randomly spinning around in circles.

Now, reaching out for his twentieth shot-this number is likely exaggerated-he raised the glass in an odd kind of salute. "Mustafa!"

With that he collapsed, his body falling to the floor with a loud thud. Silver quickly ran over to aid him. His eyes were open, his pulse was steady, and he was still breathing. All of these were good signs, but the way his body seemed to move like it was under water made her a bit uncomfortable.

"Is he going to be okay?" Silver asked, concern filling her features as she stared up at the god of chaos.

Discord waved a dismissive hand at her. "Oh, he'll be fine. But, it would seem that he has lost once again."

Ryan lifted his head and pointed an accusing finger at him. "Ffffuuck...your mother."

He chuckled at the human's behavior and watched as Silver's small body strained as she tried to lift him up. "Allow me to help you with that."

With a snap of his fingers, followed by a bright flash of light, Ryan's body was now laying down in a shopping cart. Discord chuckled before continuing. "Go on now, the game is over. We shall play again some other time. Until then, you should probably push him around for a while. I think some fresh air will do him some good."

Silver wasn't sure how to respond to what Discord had just done and settled with just nodding and rolling Ryan out of the room and into the hallway.

Discord wore a mischievous grin as he watched them leave, getting ready to watch how things would unfurl this time around. With another snap of his fingers he was turned completely invisible and began following the two.

Back in the hallway, Silver pushed the cart to Celestia knows where. She had only been here for a couple of days now and was still learning how to get around. "Ryan, do you know where we are going?"

"Not really..." He lifted his head a bit so he could see over his legs, but that only worked for a few seconds. The movement sent of wave of motions into his brain, making him much more nauseous than he was comfortable with. That being a thing, he lowered himself back down. "Just keep going forward. I'm sure we'll figure something out."

I'm hungry...

"Let's go get some fucking burgers, man. I'm starving." Ryan said to the small changeling.

"What's a burger?"

"Just shut up and keep pushing..."

After about a minute they continued to see nothing but hallway after hallway, occasionally passing by a few ponies who would give them odd looks. In the cart, Ryan made a silent prayer to have another drink and like magic a bottle of Sweet Apple Ale appeared in his hands.

Fuckin magic, dude...rules

He twisted the cap off and took a swig, letting out a content hum as the liquid poured down his throat.

They passed by several more ponies while going down the hall, each one giving them a look of both confusion and curiosity. Silver almost bumped into a thestral guard at one point, but just barely managed to turn away from him.

The changeling was starting to get tired from pushing Ryan. He was heavier than he looked, which led her to eventually stop in the middle of the hall to catch her breath.

Ryan quickly took notice of the lack of movement and turned his head. It wasn't enough to see Silver, but it was as far as his neck could go in his current position. "What's wrong? You gettin tired?"

"A little bit. I'm sorry."

"It's cool, take a break. A couple more minutes won't kill us." He said, taking another sip of the ale.

Once Silver was able to breathe properly again, she returned to pushing the cart.

With boredom eventually sinking in after minutes more of going down seemingly endless hallways, Ryan decided that the best way to pick up the mood would be to sing a song.

"~I walk in the bar and

the fellas all cheer,

They order me up

a whiskey and beer.

You ask me why

I'm writing this poem,

Some call it a tavern

but I call it home.

Fuck you, I'm drunk!

Fuck you I'm drunk!

Pour my beer down the sink,

I've got more in the trunk!

Fuck you I'm drunk!

Fuck you, I'm drunk!

And I'm going to be drunk

until the next time I'm drunk!"

If their current predicament wasn't enough to get them stared at from all directions, then this definitely did it. He went on to finish the song and Silver couldn't make heads or tails of it.

"That doesn't even make sense." She quipped, "How can you get drunk if you are already drunk?"

"Cause fuck you, that's how."

Gourmet was having a rather slow day. There were no big meetings, so minus having to cook and prepare meals for the princesses, he didn't have a whole lot to do today. Seeing how this was how the day was playing out, he predicted that he would be able to leave early and go home to his wife and kids with little interruption.

Boy was he wrong.

In a fraction of a second he heard some obnoxious singing coming from the hallway and before long the kitchen door slowly began opening. He half expected to see somepony walk in, but instead was greeted with a small changeling pushing the ever-so-infamous human in a cart into the kitchen.

The two came to a stop once they got passed the door and started looking around, the human never leaving his mobile transport. Gourmet grumbled at the sight. He knew that Luna's mate was the one who took his expensive wines a while back and since then has held a bit of a grudge.

He walked over to the two, quickly earning their attention, and stood before them with a reprimanding look on his face. "What do you think you're doing in here?"

Silver was about to answer, but was cut off as Ryan spoke up, slowing pulling himself out of the cart and leaning against it to keep him somewhat balanced. "Well, sir. We were just looking to get a quick meal before we went off to bed."

"It's seven o'clock in the afternoon..."

Gourmet and Ryan had a small stare down before the human chugged down the last of his ale and smashed the bottle over the pony's head. He instantly fell to the ground, unconscious.

You got knocked the fuck out!

Ryan eyed the pony for a second before walking around and digging through pantries. Silver walked up to the pony and gave him several pokes in the side. He was out cold and likely wouldn't be getting back up any time soon. "Why did you do that?"

"He was being a dick." Ryan said as he continued sifting through several cabinets, finding mostly a bunch of herbs and spices. Eventually he found his way into the fridge and spotted a small, white frosted cake.

It aint no burger, but it'll do.

He grabbed the cake from its shelf and pulled it out of the fridge, but before he could turn away he spotted several bottles of wine hidden in the back. He hummed to himself as he pondered a thought before coming to a conclusion. He set the cake down and grabbed the bottles, tossing them into the cart. With those out of the way he grabbed the cake and let himself fall back into the cart, his back resting on the bottles and the cake resting on his stomach.

Ryan raised a hand into the air, two fingers pointing toward the exit. "Onward!"

Luna's commander of the thestral guard entered her office, holding a stack of documents in his hands and reading through them one final time before closing them and bowing before the princess. "Your highness?"

Luna looked up from her desk at the thestral who had entered. He was supposed to be delivering a follow up report to her about the changelings from the hive Ryan had been kidnapped to. "Ah, commander. Any news that I should be aware of?"

The commander rose from his bow and placed the documents onto her desk, allowing her to look through them. "Hardly, your majesty. With their queen eliminated they have receded deeper into the Badlands. No sign of retaliation has been identified thus far. It seems, with their queen gone, they are lost. We see no further problems from them in the immediate future."

She nodded, going over the files herself to confirm what he had just told her. "Very well. Thank you, commander. You are relieved for the rest of the evening."

He bowed once more before thanking her and making his way to the door. He paused as he was just about to leave and turned back toward Luna. "If I may, your highness? I did see something rather peculiar today."

Luna's attention moved from the files back to the thestral. "Anything dire?"

"Not dire, but definitely odd."

She gave him a curious look and leaned back into her chair. "Proceed."

"While I was making my way here, I spotted the young changeling you have welcomed into the castle." He explained. "She was pushing a shopping cart around through the hallways."

The princess wasn't sure what to think about this. It didn't seem malevolent, or bad in any way, but it was weird. "That does sound strange."

"It gets stranger. If I'm remembering correctly, your mate was inside of the cart."

There was a moment of silence as Luna tried to piece together what she had just heard. "I think I'm going to go check up on that."

Ryan pointed at the door to his bedroom, signaling for Silver to take them there. "Here it is, let's go."

She pushed the cart toward the room, the guards standing just outside of it being gracious enough to opened the door for her. She thanked them and made her way in with the human still settled into his spot within the cart.

Once inside the doors closed behind them and Ryan climbed out of the cart, being careful not to drop the cake he had been holding. He placed the pastry on the bed, making sure to stare at it for a few long second so he knew it wouldn't fall. "Good shit!"

Silver looked up at the cake. "It does look really yummy."

Ryan's gaze at the frosted treat was almost hypnotic. At this moment, that cake was all his intoxicated mind wanted. "Yes it does...You ready to help me eat this thing."

"Oh yeah."

They were about to dig in when the door opened, causing both of them to turn around and face whoever may be entering; Ryan standing directly in front of the cake so it would not be seen.

To their dismay, the one who had entered was Luna, who seemed to be wearing a curious look on her face. She glanced around the room, spotting the cart, which clearly had something in it, then stopping at the human and the changeling, who seemed to be hiding something.

Her eyes narrowed at the two, her arms crossing as she glared at them. "What's going on you two?"

"Nothing!" They replied in unison.

Luna stared them down for a few seconds, noting that Ryan's body seemed to be wobbling around even while he was standing still. She sniffed the air, a familiar aroma seemed to be floating around the room as well. She followed the smell all the way to Ryan before taking another whiff right in front of his face. "Have you been drinking again?"

Nope!

"No..."

One of her eyebrows raised at him, her stern gaze never faltering for even a second. Silver was already starting to shake in her boots...Okay, if she were wearing boots she'd be shaking in them. Don't judge me!

Uh...mrrr!

"Okay, maybe a little..."

She lifted a hand and lightly pushed the side of his shoulder. His lack of balance suddenly kicked in and Ryan collapsed to the floor for the second time today.

Ouch...

"Okay, maybe a lot."

Her gaze wandered up to the bed and her eyes widened as she spotted the cake that was hidden behind him. She looked back down at Ryan and leaned down, to help him up.

Once he was back on his feet Luna pulled him into a tight hug. "Oh, I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to ruin the surprise!"

Silver was the only one who seemed to register what Luna had just said. "What?"

Luna was so busy with her forced embrace that she didn't even hear the changeling and focused on trying to apologize. "I should have just stayed at work until it was actually time to leave." She released Ryan and gave him a big fat kiss on his cheek. "How did you even know it was my birthday today?"

Drunk or not, I will help you save this!

Ryan's head bobbed slightly with how Luna was treating him. This gave his mind time to get a few gears turning. "I have my ways. Hell, it's not like I wasn't going to find out and set this up for you...so, yeah! Happy fuckin birthmas."

Okay, I fucked that up a little.

Luna chuckled at him. He was such an adorable drunk. She was still a little upset for spoiling the surprise, but Ryan didn't seemed bothered by it. Maybe she hadn't ruined it completely. "Thank you, love."

Ryan leaned over toward the cart, grabbing one of the bottles of wine and holding it out in front of her the way a waiter would. "A drink for the lovely birthday girl?"

She smiled and grabbed the bottle, looking it over for herself. Her eyes nearly bulged out of her sockets as she read the label out loud. "Sparkling Honey Moscoto? This wine only comes from the honey farms on the other side of Equestria! How did you get a bottle?"

"I know a guy." He said with a shrug.

A guy who's currently passed out on the kitchen floor.

Luna wrapped her arms around Ryan, this time kissing him on the lips. "You spoil me, you know that?"

"I could say the same thing to you." He laughed, "So, how about some cake? I hope you don't mind, but I asked Silver to join us. She did help me get everything here after all."

The princess looked down at Silver, who was smiling nervously and giving her a small wave. She smiled at her, easing the little ones nerves some. "Of course not."

Luna looked back at Ryan and leaned into his ear. "Later, I'll make sure to give you a present for being so sweet."

His body shuddered slightly. You know; The good kind of shudder you get when a fine ass woman basically tells you that she's gonna fuck your brains out for the next couple of hours.

"I'll cut the cake!" Luna proclaimed, using her magic to make knife appear in her hand before making her way over to the bed to get a few slices ready for everyone.

Ryan took a deep breath as a sudden wave of relief washed over him. He felt a light tugging on his shirt and looked down to see Silver motioning for him to lower himself. He complied and she leaned up to his ear. "I'm confused, did you actually know it was her birthday?"

"Of course I knew it was her birthday. I wouldn't have been getting this stuff together otherwise." He said out loud, turning his head to see Luna smiling at him with a blush on her face.

When she turned back to the bed to continue cutting the cake, Ryan looked back at Silver and nodded while mouthing the words, 'I had no fucking idea'.

Author's Note

Just because, why the fuck not. I hope you enjoy the little chapter I made here today, don't really have much else to say so...yeah. Hope you all enjoy. Feel free to leave a comment below, comments make me feel special. I'll see you all next time. Adios!

Song used:

I want you...

Today has been interesting, to say the least. This morning Celestia walked into the kitchen to find her top of the line chef, Gourmet, passed out on the floor and surrounded by glass. Upon further inspection she also found that the fridge was open and that the cake she had made for Luna's surprise birthday party had gone mysteriously missing.

Well, maybe it wasn't missing. It could have just been moved to a different spot. Besides that, she still wondered why her favorite chef was passed out on the floor with a broken bottle laying beside him.

There were a number of theories that could be made about that one; from him deciding to have a private celebration, to being knocked out. She doubted that it was the latter, but it was still a possibility. Just not a very likely one.

After having a nurse come by to grab him she made her way back to her room and got started on making invitations. She was making out a few letters and having them sent out. She also needed to get started with preparations. She thought it would be best to leave Cadence out of this arrangement, seeing how Luna seemed pretty pissed at her last time she was over.

She never did get the full story on what had happened. She would have to make it a point to ask Ryan some time, he didn't have a lot of shame from what she could see. He would tell stories about things that, any normal pony, would be embarrassed by. But, rather than be embarrassed, he would make a joke and laugh about it.

Yeah, he is definitely an interesting character, there's no doubt about that. There was one story he told that made her worry about his mental health...and allowing him anywhere near fire.

"What kind of man would do that to his own genitals?" She asked herself, still wondering why someone would be so brutal to their own body.

Ignoring any further thoughts about Ryan's weird behavior she went back to sending out letters to the whole gang. There wasn't allot of ponies to invite; Primarily it was just going to be her, Luna, Ryan, Twilight, and the rest of the elements.

This should be fun! They can play games, get to know Ryan better, and just spend time together. That was something they hadn't done in a long time.

The letters were sent out to their respective ponies, now all she had to do was inform some of the castle staff of the arrangement so they could get started on setting everything up for a lovely evening among friends.

After finding no trace of the cake she asked for a few of the other chefs to get started on preparing a new one for the party.

Much to her surprise, Luna and Ryan were nowhere to be seen. They were usually up around the same time as her. Well, Luna usually was. Ryan was a bit more stubborn. Settling on the idea that they decided to sleep in, she made her way over to her sisters room and gave the door a few knocks. She could hear a few groans from the other side, but not much else.

Celestia pushed the door open, wanting to have them up and ready for the party. Luna was the only one who knew about the party, as she had not gotten around to informing Ryan about it quite yet. Though, she did assume that Luna would tell him at some point. He probably knows. She would have preferred to have the party yesterday, on the day of her sisters birthday, but they simply had too much to do.

She made her way into the room and flicked on the lights. The first thing to grace her vision was a large lump in the blankets on the bed. After moving closer to get a better look, she saw the two huddled up against each other, just cuddling the day away. Luna's face was buried into the humans bare chest and Ryan's arms were wrapped around her form, his head resting just a bit higher than hers, angled in a way to keep him from being stabbed by her horn. The sight would have been absolutely adorable if it weren't for the fact that the whole room smelled like sex and booze.

This whole room, the bed especially, needed a viscous scrubbing with bleach. All of the bleach!

Without further delay, Celestia grabbed the blankets and pulled it off of the sleeping couple. Not caring that they were literally butt-ass naked in front of her. She's seen more than enough of both of them for this to phase her. "Rise and shine, love birds. The day is young and-"

Fuck your shit!

Celestia quickly ducked as a glass bottle came flying for her head, just barely managing to dodge it. It flew over her and shattered against the wall, leaving shards of broken glass spread out in the nearby area.

She rose back up, glancing at the broken bottle before glaring back at Ryan. Surprisingly, he was till fast asleep. How in the hell did he do that if he was still passed out?

Never mind, right now she just needed to get them up. Her horn started glowing as she prepared a spell.

Shit, fuck! Wake up, you stupid son of a bitch!

Ryan groaned as his eyes began to feel as though they were being forced open. He spotted Celestia, who quickly took notice of him regaining conciseness, and watched as a glow in her horn began to fade away. He let out an annoyed sigh. "What?"

She was gonna do a thing. I don't know what it was, but I'm not taking any chances!

Celestia, thinking he was talking to her, cleared her throat before responding. "As I was saying earlier; you two need to get up. Our guests will be here soon and Luna needs to ready herself for the party."

"What party?" He asked, his face contorting a bit from confusion.

One of Celestia's brows raised at his question. Had Luna really not told him about the party, or that yesterday was her birthday? "Yesterday was Luna's birthday, the party is today. Did she not tell you?"

Ryan's wore a deadpan expression as he took in the information. He let it all seep in as last night's events started flooding back into his mind at record speed. His encounter with Discord, Gourmet, the shopping cart, the-

Uh oh...

The cake...

Luna began to stir from her sleep, the sound of the two talking finally being enough to pull her out of her slumber. The first thing she saw was Ryan, propped up on one of his arms. She smiled and sat up just enough to kiss his cheek. "Good morning, hun."

Ryan didn't respond, making her feel a bit uncomfortable. She started to notice the expression on his face, a look that he had whenever he realized that he had just done something that was either really bad, or really stupid. He also seemed to be looking very intently at something behind her.

She turned around and saw her older sister standing just a few inches from the bed. "Tia, what are you doing in here?"

Her gaze left Ryan and shifted to her little sister. "I was coming in here to wake you. The castle staff is currently getting everything ready for your party and the invitations have already been sent. We can't seem to find the-"

She stopped as a soft squelching noise was heard when Ryan began lifting himself off of the bed. His body froze as he realized what he and Luna were both laying on top of. "Did we really...just right there...Like it-?"

Like it didn't even exist.

Celestia leaned closer to them to get a better look at what they were laying in. "Is that the cake I had Gourmet make for the party?"

Luna's eyes widened. Did her sister just say that, that was the cake she had made for her party? Her head slowly turned toward the human laying beside her, her eyes glaring daggers at him. "Ryan..." She said with a slight venom in her voice.

"Uhhh..."

She was about to charge her mate when suddenly a chunk of the cake was thrown in her face and Ryan took off at a full sprint out of the room, making an odd noise as he made his escape from the room.

The night princess growled as she wiped the cake from her face with her hands. A light chuckling caught her attention from behind her. Her sister seemed to find something about this amusing. "What's so funny?"

Celestia placed a hand over her mouth, trying to silence herself. "I'm sorry." She said between laughs. "I don't know why that got to me. It was just too funny."

Luna and Ryan would meet again in the bath house where he would explain the whole situation to her. She couldn't help but get a few laughs from his story. She was a bit shocked with how well he played off his shenanigans as a good natured gesture, that mind of his is definitely a crafty one.

Once the air was cleared between them they got to work with cleaning each other off in the bath, pausing to kiss or make out every so often. There was a quick relief period between the two of them. This led them to having to drain the water and refill it to get cleaned up again, but they didn't mind. They were having fun and they still had some time to kill before the party actually started.

After they had gotten themselves cleaned up they went back to their room to get dressed. Seeing how this was technically a formal event, Ryan wore his favorite suit; which consisted of a pair of black dress pants and a vest overtop of a blue dress shirt with the sleeves rolled up passed his elbows. As usual, he tossed the tie aside and settled with having his moon necklace take its place, keeping the top buttons of the shirt undone so it could be seen.

He placed a bit of gel in his hair and spiked it to the side, something he liked to do that made him look nice as well as it still looking pretty cool in his eyes.

Ryan made his way to Luna and his jaw nearly dropped. She wore, what they called in his world, a convertible navy blue maxi dress. It hangs low and is very loose around the lower body with a wavy look to it. She had a teal hue around her eyes and cheeks that shined and glistened in the light. Finally, she wore black lipstick...that's all that can really be said about it. It's black...

Never the less, she was absolutely stunning. Luna began walking over to Ryan, her hips swaying almost hypnotically with every step. His eyes couldn't seem to leave her as she wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him. "Holy fuck, you are gorgeous."

"Aren't you the sweetest." She giggled, staring up into his bright blue eyes. She wondered how she managed to be so lucky to find someone like him. Granted she kind of cheated when it came to the whole finding him part, but still, she felt like the luckiest mare in the world.

They stood in relative silence, merely enjoying the others company. Even when all was quiet, everything that happened between them just felt so perfect. No matter what happened the only thing they wanted was each other. Nothing else mattered when it came to their mate. The world could be burning around them and, as long as they got to hold each other, they'd let themselves burn.

Sadly, this little daydream of theirs had to come to an end. There was a party waiting for them just outside of their room and they fully intended to be in attendance.

The couple made their way to the dining room, where the party was being held, with a bit of pep in their step. Luna managed to catch a glimpse of something that struck her as a bit odd. Ryan looked nervous.

She stopped just before they could enter the dining room, causing him to stop as well to check up on her. "Everything alright, sweetheart?"

"I could ask you the same thing." She said with a knowing look.

Shit, make something up!

He smiled at her, doing his best to mask his feelings. "I'm fine, Luna."

She raised a brow at him, knowing that he wasn't telling the truth.

"Okay, maybe I'm a little nervous about meeting the whole gang. Give me a break, I'm only human."

Luna couldn't help but laugh at this. In all actuality, despite the obvious biological dissimilarities, human and pony kind were pretty much the same. Hell, they even spoke the same languages. At least, that's what Ryan had told her. They just had different names for them. Among language, humans had come up with ways to fly, control the weather-

The government controls the weather. DON'T LET THEM LIE TO YOU!!!

-and even lift things without using their hands. They truly were an interesting species, and very smart from what she had deciphered. She would like to see more of them one day, but the chances of that happening were very slim. But, a mare can dream.

Despite Ryan's words, she knew that what he said wasn't true. There was something else bothering him, she could feel it. From the looks of it though, he wasn't planning on telling her what it was. Not yet anyway.

"Come on," Ryan pushed, like literally, he started pushing her into the party. "time's a wastin!"

Once they entered they were met by a whole lot of hollering that totally didn't make Luna jump and scare Ryan into cowering like a little bitch behind her.

Stop being a pussy and get out there. It's a party, this is your territory!

Ryan peeked over Luna to see an assortment of mares of all colors and sizes. One very poofy pink looking pony was holding some sort of rope in her hand and upon pulling it a number of canons sounded off, shooting confetti every which direction.

...or maybe it's not...

"What the actual fuck?" He asked no one in particular.

Focus! Just play it cool and stick to the plan. We can't fuck this up!

Luna laughed, knowing these ponies she was able to expect something like this, but Ryan was completely unaware which just made it funny to her. "Calm down, they're not going to hurt you."

Ryan walked out from behind Luna and stood by her side, playing it off as if nothing had happened. "I know that, I was just...caught off guard is all."

"You're too cute." She said, grabbing his head and pulling him in for a kiss.

He accepted it and ignored the whistles and whooping going on around them. You'd think this room full of mares was a college frat house with how much noise they were making. Ryan broke the kiss and smiled at Luna. "Go fuck yourself."

She gave him a hard, but playful, punch in the arm before sending him off into the small crowd to mingle. And by all means, she actually shoved him, causing him to bump into a very colorful Pegasus.

In his mind this had been planned between them, because right as he bumped into her, her hands grabbed on to his arms and pulled him in between two other mares among her.

They all stared at him in all, letting out a series of gasps to show how fascinated they were of him. Ryan had never seen these mares before. The only one from their group that he had any knowledge of was Twilight and he didn't even know her all that much. If anything he scared that poor mare more times than he can count. From what he could see, the young purple alicorn was talking to Celestia while Luna was speaking to two other ponies that he didn't know.

He took a moment to analyze the mares around him; One was a light shade of blue with wings and a rainbow mane, she was wearing jean shorts and a white tank top. Another one was orange with no extra extremities, she had hair almost as blonde as his and was dressed much like how a cowgirl would in his world.

She even has the hat!

The final pony was clearly a unicorn; her body was whiter than white and she had purple hair that had been expertly curled to its current position. He really had no way to describe what she was wearing, but it was fancy. That's all he could really get about it.

He eyed this mare for maybe a minute and she quickly took notice of this. In fact, she was starting to look uncomfortable. He figured he should probably say something to fix this. "Thanks."

She cocked her head to the side and gave him a questioning gaze. "I beg your pardon?"

"Well, after looking around for a bit I was starting to feel a little over-dressed. Felt like I needed to run off and change into something more casual, but you have taken my self-esteem and given a much needed push." He explained, her features softening up a bit as she realized the point he was getting across. "So thanks for making me feel less awkward. Lovely outfit by the by. The name's Ryan."

He held a hand out and she smiled as she reached out and accepted it. Once it was in his grip he decided to play the true gentleman role and lifted it to his face, placing a kiss on her knuckles. She blushed slightly in response. "It's no wonder Princess Luna is so taken with you. You are quite the gentlecolt. I am Rarity, the element of generosity. It's a pleasure."

She reminds me of a much more refined version of our aunt...Keep and eye on her...

Ryan nodded to her then turned to face the cowgirl-er pony? I don't fucking know, I'm a human for shit sake! He held a hand out to her, which she quickly accepted, nearly crushing the appendage in her grip. "Howdy, partner. I'm Applejack, the element of honesty."

His hand instinctively tightened until his grip matched hers. He'd have done that to begin with if he had known that she had the handshake of a fucking body-builder!

"You got quite the grip there." She commented, releasing his hand. "I take it that you're a working man."

He silently winced at the pain in his hand, but played it cool. Can't look like a total bitch in front of Luna's friends. "I dabble here and there. I do construction for some of the many buildings in Canterlot. Back where I come from though I was doing everything from farm work to demolition. I'm real good at demolition."

She chuckled, "I'll be sure to give you a holler next time I need a barn taken down. Last time I had RD do it she nearly took out half of Ponyville."

Before he could respond, the blue Pegasus that had pulled him into this little circle cut it. "Hey, it wasn't that bad. Besides, no pony should have been complaining. They got a free show from a genuine wonderbolt."

The two mares rolled their eyes at the Pegasus, who merely scoffed at them before jumping in front of the human with a look of pride. Mostly cockiness, but still pride. "Anyway, I'm Rainbow Dash; Fastest flyer in Equestria and element of loyalty."

You forgot ignorant, stuck up, and bitch...

Wow, where the fuck did that come from?

Ryan paused for a moment, analyzing this mare especially. "You seem like the daredevil type, am I right on that?"

Rainbow Dash seemed to light up a bit at this, as if she were expecting a challenge to be issued. "Heck yeah, I am! I can take on anypony at just about anything."

"Bet you can't out-drink me."

Luna felt a small tingle run down her spine.

Rainbow Dash seemed shocked by this. She had just met this creature from another world and he already thought he could best her at something. "Oh really?"

Cockiness levels rising. Prepare for shit-storm!

Just as Ryan was about to retort he felt a hand grab him by the arm and pull him away from the group. Come to find out, it was Luna who was pulling him away. "Okay, that's enough you two. We don't need my mate having too much fun."

"But-"

"No, Ryan. No drinking games tonight." She reprimanded while still somehow managing to look playful about it.

"What's wrong, Ryan?" Rainbow began, "Can't stand up to your mare?"

This was a cruel way to tease Ryan, in his sense. He wasn't going to argue with Luna, he would respect her wishes simply because it was the right thing to do. But now, he went from wanting to take this mare on in a friendly drinking game to wanting to beat her with a golf club.

Give her the same treatment Elin gave to Tiger Woods.

"Well, Rainbow..." Luna cut in, "If that's how you feel then I guess you won't be drinking tonight either."

Rainbow Dashes face immediately dropped, her cocky attitude vanishing in less than split second. "What!? B-but-"

"No buts. You're just going to have to settle with watching your friends have fun without you." She said with a smile, dragging Ryan off to meet the rest of the group while leaving Rainbow in a pouting heap; her friends whispering back and forth and giggling at her.

Ryan and Luna made their way to the next group, the human leaning over and kissing his princess on the cheek. "God, I love you."

"You better." She teased.

They went up to the group, which consisted of Celestia, Twilight, and two ponies Ryan has yet to meet. One of them was yellow with a pink mane. She wore a simple pair of pants and a green sweater. She seemed shy...and had really big boobs.

Holy shit...

Luna smirked and pushed his head to the other mare, knowing that Fluttershy was basically eye candy to him. This one was pink with an even pink-er mane...

How is that possible!?

Like with most of the others she was dressed rather casually. A pair of pants and a pink t-shirt with balloons on it. She was a bit thicker than the others. She wasn't fat, but she had noticeably more meat on her bones. This one appeared as though she was going to jump out of her skin at any moment and in the blink of an eye Ryan's vision went pink.

Oh God, it's going to consume us!

The mare wrapped the human in a spine crushing embrace, lifting him off of his feet like he weighed no more than a feather. "Hi, I'm Pinkie Pie and I hope that you and I can be friends!" She said at speeds that could not be matched before releasing him so he could breathe. "You're weird looking. Not a bad kind of a weird though, more like a fun kind of weird. You know; the kind of weird where you're like 'Oh! That looks cool! I wanna try it.' You and I are going to be great friends! I can throw you parties, we can play games, there's just so much we could-"

The flow of words came to a relieving end as Twilight placed a hand over Pinkie's mouth. "I think what she is trying to say is; It's nice to meet you."

The pink mare nodded furiously in agreement, a few muffled noises coming from her mouth as she attempted to vocally agree as well.

Ketamine is a hell of a drug, kids. Stay clean, don't be a Pinkie.

Ryan placed a hand to his head, massaging his temples as he tried to recuperate from whatever the fuck just happened. "I think I'm going to have an aneurism."

Celestia put a hand to her muzzle to keep herself quiet. This was already becoming pretty amusing to her. Rather than interfere, she figured that she would just sit back and see how the rest of this plays out.

"That's not good." Came a very timid voice just beside him. Ryan turned to see the final mystery mare very slowly making her way over to him. "Are you going to be okay? If you're not feeling well then maybe you should see a doctor."

He waved a dismissive hand to her. "I'm fine, it's just an expression where I come from."

She blushed slightly, mostly from being slightly embarrassed for not realizing he wasn't serious. But, she managed to put on a smile. "Oh, okay. I'm sorry, I didn't know."

"It's fine. There's a lot of things I say and do around here that ponies don't understand. I actually spend allot more time explaining myself than I'd like to." He said with a light chuckle.

"You seem very fascinating though." She commented, actually being very interested in him and what he was. "I'm Fluttershy, it's nice to meet you."

"Ryan, it's a pleasure to make your acquaintance." His eyes couldn't seem to stop wandering down to her chest region. He did his best to fight it, but it was like trying to pull metal away from a magnet. A very BIG magnet.

Fluttershy caught him glancing down at her chest and blushed once again. Luckily for her, Luna came to the rescue by grabbing Ryan's head and pulling it towards her. "Stop staring." She whispered.

"I can't help it." He replied in an equally hushed tone. "They're so fucking massive! You can't tell me that you haven't been looking either."

Luna stuttered at being called out like that. "T-that besides the point!"

Ryan laughed, knowing that, once again, he had won. He grabbed her by the hips and pulled her close, placing a gentle kiss on her lips. This act earned them a chorus of aww from all around the room.

The human broke the kiss and looked around the room before speaking in a stereotypical new Yorker accent. "Ah shut up, the lot of ya."

The room then filled up with a light chuckling from every direction.

Ryan felt a light tugging on his leg and looked down to see Silver wearing, wouldn't you know it, a silver dress that fitted her small form perfectly. "Hey, shrimp. Where've you been hiding?"

Silver smiled up at him and slipped one of her hands into his pocket, dropping something into it and removing her hand before anypony could see. "I was just making sure that everything was taken care of." She said with a prideful look about her.

The human winked at the changeling. "That's my girl." He gave her a fist bump.

Luna stared them both down, knowing that they were up to something. The way they were behaving around each other was a dead giveaway that they had some sort of plan in motion. But what was it?

Silver slipped away from Ryan and Luna and was now going for for the eldest. Once she had spotted Celestia she gave her a thumbs up. The alicorn nodded and cleared her throat to get everyones attention. "Okay, my little ponies. Who's ready for some cake?"

Minus Luna, the whole room cheered. She had watched Silver give her older sister some kind of signal before she called for this. Was everypony in on it?

After the cake had been cut and served everyone sat down at the table, ate, and mingled. Ryan was getting most of the attention, him being from another world and all. He would tell stories of all kinds of things; most of them were funny, some were full of suspense and fighting, there were a couple of tear jerkers, but he tried to keep those ones to a minimum. The last thing he wanted to do was spoil a party.

Once the cake had been cleared through, mostly by Celestia and Pinkie-

At least Celestia was being subtle.

It was time for presents. Luna had told them all that there was no need to bring gifts, but they did anyway. They were friends after all. She received a number of things; A collection of old books from Twilight, a special brew of cider from Applejack, a very shiny new dress from rarity, a track suit from Rainbow, lilipop-zilla from pinkie-

That thing is taller than her!

stuffed animals from Fluttershy, and a slice of cake to the face from Celestia. Everypony laughed at the final gift, even Luna found herself nearly busting her gut at her sister's little prank. Silver went out of her way to help clean the princess off, taking a napkin and placing it over her face to wipe it clean of any pastry remnants. Luckily none of it got on her dress, so no real damage was done.

If she were being honest, she was expecting Ryan to do something like that. She mentally slapped herself for not suspecting her sister of having a plan like this up her sleeve though.

Silver pulled the napkin from Luna's face, having cleaned all of it off. Luna thanked the changeling then noticed something odd. The lights in the room seemed much more dim than they were earlier. Everypony had gotten out of their seat and was standing on the opposite end of the dinning room table, but those were just the ponies.

She looked to her side and spotted Ryan sitting on the edge of the table on the same side as her. He was holding a small black book in his hands and looking down at it as if he were reading it. Clearly she was dumbfounded by what had happened and, above all, confused.

Ryan licked his fingers and flipped the page, coughing a couple of time into his hand before reading aloud. "Luna, I can't say how much you mean to me.

Being with you has made my life so much more dreamy.

You light up my night.

Like the moon, you always shine bright."

Luna couldn't help but blush. This was probably the sweetest thing he had ever done for her. The fact that this was happening at her birthday party only made it feel that much more special to her.

"We are different, but the same.

Calm as the wind, but can't be tamed.

Before I came here my heart was always in two."

He shrugged his shoulders and looked up from the book.

"These pages are blank, why am I lying to you?"

Ryan showed her the inside of the book. As he had said, the pages were completely void of any filling. Each one was empty and white. He lifted the book and placed it on top of his head like a hat, making everypony in the room giggle.

"That's not something to worry about, I'd never lie.

Not to you, my dear. I'd rather die.

Let's cut through the bullshit, I hope you don't mind.

But this connection I have with you is unlike any kind.

Hold on."

He grabbed the book from his head and looked down at its blank pages, licking his finger and flipping it to another blank page before placing it back on his head. The ponies laughed again while Luna eagerly waited to hear the rest of it.

"I don't want to give up what I have now,

You're all too perfect.

You're sweet, you're crazy, you're well-endowed.

He paused for a second to laugh with everypony after that last line.

"You're mind may not be perfect, I know that's not kind.

But frankly I don't care, your crazy matches mine.

So enough of this foolishness, I'm ready to start my life.

What I'm trying to say is..."

Ryan grabbed the book once again, but this time tossed it aside. He got off of the table and slipped a hand into his pocket, pulling out something small before reaching out and grabbing one of Luna's. Once he had her hand in his he lowered himself down on to one knee.

Luna's eyes widened as a thought came in to her mind. That thought only became stronger when she felt something sliding over one of her fingers. Her eyes locked onto his, never moving, just waiting.

"I want you to be my wife."

There was a painful pause after he said those last words. Luna didn't say anything, she couldn't. All she could do was look down at him and the ring he had slipped onto her finger while tears worked their way down her face, making her makeup run along with it.

She couldn't believe what was happening. "Are you serious?"

"As a heart attack." He said with a warm smile aimed directly at her.

She pulled her hand away from her mate, making his face fall to something so heartbreaking that it could cause Hell itself to turn into a block of ice.

Luna stared at him for a few more seconds, then she smiled. Before Ryan could react she was upon him. His body fell to the ground from the sudden force and her face was buried into his neck.

Hoy shit! For a second there I thought we were going to be speared by that fucking horn.

"Yes!" Luna shouted to him. "Yes, yes, a thousand times yes!"

She lifted her head from his neck and looked down at him, their eyes locking once again as they leaned in for what was probably the best kiss of their lives. A kiss that was filled with so much passion that it trumped all of their others added up and multiplied by 42!

The room was in a complete uproar. Everypony was cheering and hollering congratulations at them and wishing them luck and so on.

Get some!

And then there was him...

Not even a month later they were wedded and ready to officially start their lives together. Just for fun, here's a few quick add ons; Celestia was the priest.

Big fucking surprise.

Silver was the ring bearer.

She was so fucking cute! Walking down the isle in that little poofy dress. Fuck, I wanna hug her!

And Ryan's best ~~stallion~~ mare was Dawn Breaker.

Do we really not have a single guy friend anymore!?

Now Luna and Ryan can be seen together almost anywhere; Never leaving each others side, constantly teasing each other, and in more ways than one, and over all, just being happy.

And they were happy, especially Luna since she managed to marry the most badass human in the world. Literally the coolest motherfucker you could ever meet and a god in the sack. His greatest qualities about him was everything. Nothing was wrong with this guy. He was practically-

*Door Creaking open*

"Ryan, what are you doing?"

"Nothing sweetheart, just finishing up that story I've been working on."

"You're still not done yet?"

"I'm getting there, calm your tits."

"But if I calm them then you wouldn't be able to play with them." ;P

"...I'll be done in a minute, maybe less."

"Okay dear, I'll see you in a bit...You know, you really don't have to write that for me."

"Of course I do! It's our two hundredth anniversary and my memory is shit. Besides, I wanna do something special. And what better than to compile everything we've gone through together during our first year?"

"Alright then, you big goof. Come and find me when you're done." *Leaves*

"Don't act like it isn't a nice gesture! I know you'll love it!"

Okay guys, I got a very hot wife to go play with so I'm gonna go ahead and take off. My first year in Equestria was definitely an interesting one, but fun none the less.

And before anyone asks, yes, I said that it was our 200 year anniversary.

Fun Fact: Sleeping with an alicorn makes your immortal.

No wonder they're so picky about who they choose as a mate. That's probably why Luna got so pissed the first time we had sex and I couldn't remember. Apparently that's common knowledge here. So, yeah, a bit of culture shock.

"~Ryan, are you coming?"

"..."

Naked mare in the room. Gotta go!

Author's Note

It's finally done you guys. I know this probably seemed rushed, but I've been ready to wrap this up for a while now. I've got other projects in the works that I would like to get out soon and trying to monitor and update more than one story at a time on my schedule is kind of a whore.
I'm happy that this story became liked so much and even more happy that so many people just genuinely enjoyed it. I never expected any of my stories to go as far as this one did. So thank you, all of you, for all of your support.
Hopefully I will see you in future stories, but for now I must go.
That being said, adios.

THE END

THE END

Seriously, what else did you expect? The title say 'The End". What the fuck else is there? That's it, the story is over. Go home, do some shit, get a job. You especially, Jeff! Get off your lazy ass and go do something, you fuck! Sheesh!

ADIOS, BITCHES!!!

Okay, okay, that wasn't my only reason for typing this out. Just for fun I figured that I'd do a little Q and A session. They've worked out pretty well in one other story I was working on so why the fuck not. Feel free to ask a question down below, just make sure you specify who you are addressing it to and I'll start having the characters answer them in about a week.
Lastly, I would like to put up a story vote. I have several different stories I have been working on that are not published yet. So far, only two of them will even be worth a damn. I'm going to put down the names and the extended description. PM me the name of whichever one you would like to see and I will kick the highest voted into gear.

Son of a moon- You know those moments where you stayed up all night partying and just kind of wake up in the middle of no where with literally zero recollection of how you got there? Yeah, this is kinda like that. The name's...I really don't know. To make this a bit shorter I'm a bit of an alcoholic despite my young age and I'm very well known for having a short-temper, a bit of an attitude, no filter, being brutally honesty, and more importantly; being sent to the nut house several times for paranoid schizophrenia. This is my story about how a night of drinking turned into a complete shit-storm as well as some crazy bitch who thinks she's my parent. Arriva darchi, motherfuckers.

The Perfect Mate, Twilight Saga- Okay, this one I haven't been working on, but it seemed like a fun idea. I'm not planning on giving out the details about it yet, but this was something I was thinking about throwing together for a few weeks now. I just need to get it started, but first I need to know how many people would be interested.

Finding That Special Someone

The curiosity building in her had been well past set in for over an hour, but that was just today. Luna had been hiding out in her room for weeks now, hardly ever coming out. She had been caught sneaking out a few times though and flying off to who knows where, but why? Twilight let these things roll around in her head, trying to figure it all out.

"I'm sorry Celestia, but I just don't get it." She finally said, "Luna's behavior is basically that of stubborn teenager now and I just can't seem to figure out why. I'm sorry."

Celestia nodded to her once most faithful student with a heavy heart and sighed. "It is quite alright, Twilight. I did not bring you here expecting answers. At the bare minimum I was just hoping to have a second opinion."

Twilight's inner psychiatrist fumbled around with her thoughts, making her come up with a few rather simple conclusion. "Maybe she's going through some sort of stress, something could be on her mind, or she simply is just acting out because she's feeling a certain way."

Celestia put a hand to her chin and let it sink in for a moment. "So it would all boil down to the fact that something is troubling her?" She asked, turning her head from Twilight to face her sister's bedroom door.

Within the confines of the dark room was a blue alicorn mare with a mane that would reflect the night itself. She wore all black clothing, which consisted of a pair of shorts, a tank top and vest, a collar, and a single glove on her right hand. She laid on her stomach in bed, thinking about what she could do about her predicament.

However, she found her thoughts being interrupted by the sound of her door opening. She rolled onto her back with an annoyed grunt to face whoever dared to enter her sanctuary without her permission. Much to her surprise, she found herself looking at a purple alicorn mare wearing a dark purple woolen dress and black leggings.

"Princess Luna?" Twilight quietly called out into the nearly pitch-black room, feeling slightly unnerved. "Are you in here? I just wanted to talk to you really quick, if that's alright."

She didn't really want to talk to her, but she didn't see the harm in it either. Honestly she was feeling rather lonely, so having Twilight around for company would probably feel pretty nice. "I am here. You may enter." Luna sat up and used her magic to turn on the lights, allowing Twilight to be able to see her surroundings.

"Thank you." Twilight said, approaching the night princess's bed. "May I?" She asked, earning herself a confirming nod from the dark alicorn. With that she took a seat on the bed and put all of her attention on Luna.

"So," Luna started with crossed arms, giving the young alicorn a rather stern glare and causing her to shrink slightly. "tell me Twilight; What is it that brings you to my chambers?"

She thought about what to say, doing her best to make this easy and not come off in a way that would make Luna get defensive. "Well, Celestia and I have noticed your recent change in behavior and-"

Luna cut her off mid sentence, pressing a finger to her lips to silence her. "And nothing. I am perfectly fine and any changes in behavior you see are clearly a misunderstanding." She stated, sounding more like she was trying to convince herself of this rather than Twilight.

Twilight could see that Luna was clearly using this as some sort of mental defense mechanism and could tell that something truly was bothering her; but what? She reached up and slowly removed Luna's fingers from her face. "Please, we just want to help you. I'm sure if you told us what was wrong then-"

"I said I'm fine!" The night princess bellowed in anger. Why couldn't this mare just see that she didn't want to talk about it? She wouldn't be able to help, she doesn't even understand...but maybe...

Twilight rose to her feet and started walking away looking defeated. She wanted to help her, but there was no point in fighting. All it would do is either make her worse, or make her do something irrational, or out of spite. Luna's rage was feared by all and for good reason. That poor guard will never be able to walk again after, what had been dubbed, The Taco Incident.

Luna wanted so badly to just let it end there and let Twilight leave, but the better side of her wouldn't allow it. "Twilight, wait!" She called out, making the small princess stop and turn to face her. "I'm sorry, I'm just- I've just been...I don't know." She sighed and curled her legs up to her chest, holding them in place with her arms and resting her head on her knees.

Twilight walked back to the bed, but this time decided against sitting. "Princess, whatever it is you can tell me. I promise I'll do everything in my power to help you. You can trust me." She said, smiling down at the upright, fetal positioned mare.

Luna lifted her head and looked at Twilight. She knew she could trust her, hell this was the pony that saved her from being stuck as Nightmare Moon for the rest of her life. After taking a deep breath, she decided it was time to spill. "I've just been so...lonely. I mean, I know I can speak with the guards, or you, or even my sister, but it's just- it doesn't feel the same."

Twilight tilted her head in slight confusion. She was a smart pony and definitely wanted to help Luna with her situation, but she wasn't quite catching onto the meaning of her explanation. "I'm not sure what you mean. Are you looking to spend more time with us? Are we not around enough?"

"It's not like that." Luna began, trying to figure out how to word what she was trying to get across. "I've been out of the loop, I haven't had...well any suitors." She watched Twilight's eyes widen and immediately knew what she was assuming. "No, not that, nothing like that! What I meant was that I'm not feeling satisfied romantically."

Twilight put a hand to her chest and took a few deep breaths. "Okay, that's...holy Celestia, you scared me there for a second." For a minute there she was starting to think that Luna was coming on to her. Not that she wasn't attractive or anything, in fact she was probably one of the most beautiful mares she had ever seen, she just didn't roll that way.

Luna sat quietly, not completely sure where to go from here. She had finally told somepony what was bothering her so...now what? "What shall we do then?" She asked, hoping this would lead somewhere good.

"I'm not sure." Twilight replied, causing Luna's features to fall. She quickly took notice of this and tried to correct the error. "But, I'm sure we can figure something out. How about I go talk to Celestia and see if there's anything we can do?"

After leaving Luna's room and making her way to the throne room, Twilight found Celestia and explained what was going on with Luna, telling her everything she had been told. "So what do you think we should do?"

"Well, there is a number of things we could do, but Luna is picky about these kinds of things." Celestia began, "Before she was banished, she and I had many suitors literally lining up to take us out. I took most of the offers that were given to give everypony a fair chance. However, Luna was not amused by her suitors. The way she would point out their flaws, it was as if she was looking for reasons to not like them."

"Do you think that maybe she just didn't find the right one?"

"I think she just wasn't giving any of them a chance. They had to be perfect and none of them were even close in her eyes."

"Isn't there something we can do?" She asked, desperate to find a way to help Luna.

Celestia took a brief moment to think about this. She wanted to help her sister, but the only thing they could do felt just plain wrong to her. "There is one thing I know we could do, however, I am not very comfortable performing this."

Twilight's eyes lit up with several different layers of curiosity. "What is it?"

"I do know a spell that alicorns used to use in circumstances like this." She explained. "I've never done it, considering it morally wrong, but it's something. This spell was used to find who that alicorn would deemed as perfect in it's eyes and tear them from their home, forcing them to their location."

Twilight became heavily interested in this spell. She'd probably never do it, but it was fascinating regardless. "How does it work?" She asked, wanting to learn more about the spell.

"It would open up a portal, one with the capability of reaching from where we stand now to the other end of the universe. When the spell is cast it is used with a telepathic link to whomever wishes to use it. With that link the portal will be able to see what that pony would consider an ideal suitor and pull the closest match it can find to them."

"That seems...like a pretty unorthodox way to find somepony you love."

"It is. Not only that, but it's not like the one retrieved was guaranteed to love them back."

"What would they do with them then?"

"They were either kept as slaves or sent back through the portal, but the portal will only remain open for seven days. So, more often then not, they were kept."

Suddenly, the metaphorical light bulb over Twilight's head flickered on. "I have an idea!"

Celestia, Luna, and Twilight were all gathered around in one of the castle's storage rooms. This one had been recently cleared out so there would be more than enough room for them. Celestia understood very well what was about to happen, Luna however did not. which prompted her to be the first of the three to speak up.

"Would somepony mind telling me why we are in a storage room?" She inquired, "I do not see how being here is going to accomplish anything."

Twilight showed off a cocky smile, being more than proud of her idea. "Oh you'd be surprised." She said. When she first thought of this she thought it was moderate, but after Celestia confirmed that the idea was actually really good her head inflated a bit. (No, not literally...jackasses)

Luna looked over at her sister, who merely nodded at her, making her attention go back to Twilight before questioning her further. "I'd like to go back to my room as soon as possible, so how about we make this quick. Why are we here?"

Twilight didn't like that Luna was trying to be so distant, but that's what they were here to fix and she wasn't going to let it ruin her mood as she explained the plan. "Celestia has recently informed me that there is a particular spell that was used for alicorn's to find ponies who might be of a certain interest to them."

Luna flinched slightly, surprised that anypony even remembered that spell existed. Hell, even she had forgotten completely about it. "Are you saying that you intend to use this to help me?"

"Yes, but it's a little more complicated than that." Twilight began. "As you know, the portal will remain open for one whole week, that's seven days for our, quote unquote, guest to make a decision."

Celestia stepped forward, entering her sisters line of sight. "We will use this spell to find you your perfect match and bring them here. But if at any time, before the seven days are up, they wish to leave, we will allow them that freedom." She explained, still not entirely sure about doing this, but she was going to leave this decision up to her sister.

Luna couldn't believe what she was hearing. How was Celestia just going to allow something like this? She wanted to argue against it, but for some reason was finding it very difficult. Her mind kept wandering back to thoughts of how lonely she was and how she so desperately desired some sort of romantic companionship. What should she do?

The two other princesses watched as Luna went through this mental war with herself. Twilight being the first to offer some words of wisdom. "We don't have to if you don't want to. We can just-"

"I want to see them first..." Luna commented out of the blue. "Celestia, you know as well as I that before the individual is yanked over to us that I will have a mere few seconds to observe them. I wish to take advantage of those few seconds and if I don't like what I see then we disable the portal immediately."

Celestia nodded, it wasn't what she was hoping to hear, but this was Luna's choice and she would respect that. "I agree to your terms." She stated plainly, reaching a hand out to her sister. "Shall we?"

Luna took Celestia's hand and held it tight. In order to perform this spell it must be cast by an alicorn onto another alicorn. The older sister closed her eyes as her horn started to become consumed by a bright, golden hue that made her head shine like a small sun.

Luna soon became engulfed by the same colored hue and looked up to see a small portal opening just above her. She could feel her link with the portal growing the further it opened, spilling all of her wants and desires into it and feeding it the information it needed. Once the portal was about the size of a full-grown stallion it stopped and an image started to appear

It was difficult to see at first, but soon it became clearer and the night princess gasped in shock. Through the portal she saw what appeared to be a bipedal creature that was moving in a very odd manner. It was almost like it was struggling for its life. "Is he dying?" She asked herself, earning shocked expressions from both Celestia and Twilight. "You have to bring him here, hurry!"

The forest was dense with trees and wet leaves. The sound of rain and thunder echoing in the distance as a storm tore through the area. Also within the forest came the sound of feet striking the ground, breaking a combination of both leaves and twigs. Two humans could be seen sprinting through the trees, one ahead of the other.

The human in the back was a darker female with brown hair, wearing a black military combat suit and holding a nine millimeter pistol in her right hand. "Stop or I'll shoot!" She yelled to the person running in front of her.

"I'll stop running when you stop being a cunt-odactyl!" Came a more masculine voice, belonging to the individual up ahead. This particular human was dressed much like how you would expect a convict to look. He wore a pair of black shoes, some old blue jeans, and an unbuttoned short sleeve blue shirt over a white T-shirt. On his back was a single-strapped brown backpack and his hands donned a pair of black finger-less gloves. His hair was short and blond and he lightly tanned skin.

As he ran the woman behind him fired two shots in his direction, intentionally missing. "I said freeze, dirt-bag!"

"And I said fuck you, bitch!" He shouted to her before finally coming up on a clearing and being forced to stop. "Holy shit!" He shouted, stopping just short of a cliff. He leaned forward to see if there was a way down, but sadly that trip would be very muddy and likely lead to a few hundred foot swan-dive straight into the raging waters below.

Damn... He thought to himself. That would have sucked.

The woman behind him came to a halt, holding her gun up only a few feet from his head. "Hands up, now!" She demanded, taking an internal sigh of relief when he actually complied. She walked up behind him, grabbing a set of hand cuffs strapped to her side. "I told you I'd catch you, Ryan. You can't run away from me forever."

"It wasn't you I was running from, it was the death-sentence. But, seeing how I'm a little fucked right now, how about you do me a solid and just pull the trigger." He said as his eyes scanned the area for anything he could use to escape.

"Sorry, buddy," She started, grabbing one of his hands and pulling it behind his back, "but I'd rather watch you suffer. I know the needle of death thing doesn't scare you, but just the fact that you've finally lost is enough to get me off. And I plan to ride it out for as long as I can."

Don't do it.

Ryan took one last glance at the edge of the cliff. "Sorry sweetheart, but I never lose." He quickly used his free arm to elbow the woman behind him, breaking her nose the second he made contact.

Don't do it!

The woman stumbled and took a step back, giving her almost-prisoner more than enough of a chance to execute his plan of escape. The only part that sucked about it was that if it didn't kill him, it was gonna hurt a lot.

Goddammit!

Once he knew he was free from her grip he took a few steps forward and jumped, letting gravity do the work for him. He looked down and stared at the fast approaching waves beneath him and closed his eyes.

Ryan's body hit the water with a loud smack, the shock of the impact causing him to twist and contort in pain. Worse than that, once he hit the water all of the air in his lungs was forced out, causing his body to instinctively suck in what it could. Being a few feet under water while this happened didn't make it any more enjoyable either.

He could feel the liquid quickly filling his lungs, causing them to burn and feel heavy. He tried to swim up, but his body was in too much pain. The most he could do was wave his limbs around like he was some sort of rag doll.

Fuck...this is it for you.

Why did you jump?

How stupid are you?

Did you really think you would survive this? That you were gonna get away?

You're an idiot.

"Fuck you too, brain." Which is what he would have said if he weren't currently drowning.

He eventually lost his mobility and let the waves carry his body. As his vision finally started to fade away he could have sworn he had heard a voice. Not like the one in his head, this one was clearly more...feminine...What are they saying?

"You have to bring him here, hurry!"

Monster Or Misunderstood?

Ryan had survived, much to his own surprise. You would think that the alabaster mare would have had him culled after catching him literally buried between her sisters legs. However, she just gave him a lesson that should have been explained before the day of the incident. The wonders of heat versus the human menstrual cycle, apparently different in a few aspects. Who'd of thunk?

That being said, he basically got away with a slap on the wrist by Celestia; whereas, when Luna was back in a proper set of mind, he was met a number of I'm so sorry's. The girl had basically lost control of her lust, which he wasn't really complaining about.

After all of that had been taken care of the mares informed him that he had a mere day to decide if he wanted to go home. He decided rather quickly not to, commenting that he nothing to go back to.

With that out of the way, Ryan and Luna worked on spending more time together to get to know each other better on a more personal level. They discussed their pasts; Luna told him about her time as Nightmare Moon and her banishment. He told her several parts of his past, but not as much as she had. Something about having a difficult time remembering most of it.

Luna knew very well why he wasn't able to remember a good portion of his life, but was still weary as to why. Yes, his subconscious mind told her that it was for his own good, but what exactly was it that had happened?

The human also spoke of possibilities of his return ending in his death, which led Luna to wonder, what had he done to deserve death back in his world. He had brought up before that he was technically on death row, but never specified why.

She wanted to know, but wasn't sure how to approach the subject, or if attempting to do so would anger him in some way. It was worth a shot she figured.

As the two sat beside each other on her bed, his arm wrapped around her shoulder comfortingly as she told the story about her banishment, she worked up the courage to finally ask, "Ryan, why is it that you were sentenced to death in your world?"

The human fell silent for a moment, not too surprised that she was curious about it, but still curious himself as to why she wanted to know. "Why so curious all of a sudden?"

She shrugged at his question. "I'm not sure, I guess I just can't see why they would require you to face such a fate. I've heard small tidbits about your childhood, from what you remember, but even less about anything else. I understand your memory is not what it should be, but I just can't seem to place you as one to deserve such a thing."

Ryan folded his lips into his mouth and bit down on them as he thought back on his last days on earth, the ones that revealed what kind of person, that he believed, he truly was on the inside. "I'll tell you, but only if you promise not to see me as...some sort of monster."

He seemed to be somewhat upset at this, and as much as she didn't want him to be uncomfortable, she had to know. And, he had to know that it was okay for him to talk to her, to confide in her, to trust her. She wrapped her arms around his side and offered him a warm embrace. "I won't, I promise."

The human nodded before taking a second to collect his thoughts. "It all started about two days before I came here..."

Ryan was standing wide eyed in a brightly lit hallway, donning a casual outfit consisting of a pair of dark blue jeans and a gray tank top and jacket. If he were to look down at his own attire, he would find fresh blood decorating several parts of his body.

Instead, his attention was focused on one of many rooms in front of him where an older looking blonde male was laying in a bed surrounded by different medical staff attempting to aid him.

Ryan ran towards the room, only to be stopped just a few feet away by security. He fought hard against them, trying desperately to get to the room where someone he cared so much for was being held. The struggle didn't go one for too long before the officers had to hit him with a taser gun. It took a few tries but eventually he stopped struggling and was dragged away.

The next day he was sitting in the waiting room, still wearing the blood stained clothing he had shown up in, waiting to hear something, anything. His prayers were soon answered by a nurse who entered and called out his name. "Ryan Curtis, you may come back."

The young human rose to his feet and followed the nurse to the room he was fighting to get to just the night before. In the room was a single doctor holding a clipboard and the same blonde male laying in the bed. Ryan walked over so he could be by his side, scanning his body and noting every bullet wound in his chest.

He moved his eyes from the sleeping form to the doctor on the other side of the bed. "Is he going to be okay?"

The medical expert held a solemn look on his face as he looked over to Ryan and nodded. "I'm sorry, we've done everything we could, but the wounds were too much. You have maybe an hour to say your goodbyes."

Ryan could feel wave after wave of tears rolling down his face as the man nodded to him and left the room for the two to have a moment to themselves.

He looked down at the man, his long hair push back so it was out of his face, and could do nothing but stare at him as he placed a hand on his chest. He could barely feel his heart beat. But, by some miracle, the man stirred from his sleep and looked up at the person by his bedside. "Ryan?"

Ryan couldn't help but smile as he awoke, but it didn't stop the water works from continuing to trail down his face. "Hi, Danny."

Danny took notice of the saddened expression on Ryan's face before speaking weakly to him. "Man, look at you. Standing here crying like a bitch."

The two shared a light laugh before Ryan's features became serious again. "Why did you do it? Why the fuck did you push me out of the way?" He knew why he did, but still found himself asking.

Danny raised one of his hands and placed it on top of Ryan's, grabbing it with what little strength he had. "Because you're my little brother, I couldn't let you get hurt. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if you did."

Ryan gripped the hand of the man he happily called his brother. They had only known each other for a few years, but with everything that they had gone through together, with all of the bullshit that surrounded them, they stayed loyal to each other. This meant the whole world to both of them; neither of them had ever found that kind of loyalty from anyone else but each other.

Danny could feel himself slipping away, Ryan could see it in his eyes as well. He wasn't going to be here much longer and they both knew it. "I love you, little brother." He said as the life in his eyes completely died out.

"I love you too, buddy."

The room was suddenly silent, minus the heart monitor that showed a flat line stretching across the screen. Ryan could feel the sadness in his heart slowly fading away and being replaced with something else, something stronger, something angry. He reached into his pocket and pulled out a crescent moon, much like the one he wore around his neck, and placed it in his brother's hand before releasing him from his grip.

Ryan went to leave the room, but took notice of a small pile of clothes neatly folded in the corner. His brother's signature clothing, a black trench coat and a pair of cargo pants. He walked over to the clothes and reached into the coat pocket, knowing very well what was hidden within it.

What are you doing?

He pulled out a small hand gun and inspected it. The safety was on and the magazine was full. Before anyone could see it, he stuffed the weapon into his pants before looking back at his brother. "They're not getting away with this."

Ryan, no!

[2 Hours Later]

Ryan sat in the middle of the woods, staring down a large shed that rested within, hidden from the outside world. He stopped at his house just before to grab a different set of clothes then made his way here. He remembered how Danny would always tell him to stay away from here, that the people out here didn't like their family and would kill him on the spot. These were the bastards that did it.

Drove by in a black SUV with gun blazing. He tried to shove Danny out of the way, but he just grabbed his arm and threw him to the ground. Ryan was spared, but Danny wasn't so lucky. This was all their fault and there was no way in hell he would let them get away with taking the only person who meant anything to him away.

He watched as a single SUV pulled up to the shed, the one that had drove by and taken his whole world away from him. Exiting the vehicle were six men, all dressed in black to make them harder to spot.

He waited for them to enter the building and close the door before coming out of hiding. The hideout had several windows just low enough for him to peek through. All of them were taking a seat at a small table, lighting cigarettes and starting up a game of cards.

Time to crash the party.

Ryan, don't do this. It's not what Danny would have wanted.

Danny is dead. Kill them. Kill them all!

Ryan was about to be at a crossroad for a moment there, but with a much louder voice egging him on his mind settled on continuing what he had set out to do. He checked the vehicle, it was unlocked. Climbing in he tossed his bag into the backseat and reached under the dashboard, removing a small panel before pulling down several wires. Time to see if his older brother's teachings were going to pay off.

The six men now sitting at the table started up their game. "Pair of kings!" One of them called out, making all but one of them groan in anger.

The one that remained silent threw his hand down on the table. "Royal flush, bitch." The whole table erupted with angry yells. Once the yelling died down and the winner collected his earnings they started up another hand. "You think we should have stopped to take out the kid?" he asked, thinking back on when they finally brought down Danny.

"Nah," One of them replied, "he's just some punk that hung out with Danny. They weren't even related, he's got no reason to do anything. Besides, he's only like nineteen, what the fuck is he gonna-"

The room fell silent as the sound of their vehicle coming to life echoed through the woods and into the shed. They all looked at one another before pulling their guns out of their pockets and going out to inspect the area.

When they went outside they were met with a bizarre sight. There was nothing out there, just the over-sized car running for god knows what reason. They put their weapons away before one voice spoke out among them. "Hey, it's your shit, go fix it."

Two men groan in annoyance and went to go see what was wrong with their vehicle. The headlights suddenly shinned brightly, blinding them for a few seconds.

A few seconds was all Ryan needed as he stepped on the gas and drove over the two, crushing them under the three ton beast's tires before continuing to drive at the building. The four remaining men ran out of its way, letting it tear through the wall and crash into the one on the other side.

They looked over at the now totaled vehicle, only one of them being man enough to run over. He held his weapon up and pointed it into the window only to find that nothing was there. He pointed to the others, "You guys, look around outside, I'll check out everything in here."

They obeyed and started searching the forest while he looked back through the window to see the kid they had almost shot earlier sitting in the seat and holding a gun to his head. He back way from the vehicle and Ryan climbed out, keeping the weapon pointed at him. "Drop it, fucker, or I'll blow your brains out!"

The man laughed at Ryan. "Come on kid, this isn't like one of your stupid video games. Put the gun down and let's talk."

"Like you talked to Danny, you fucking bitch!" Ryan pointed the gun at the mans leg and pulled the trigger. As the whole area erupted with a loud bang the man dropped to his knees, screaming in pain. "Now put it down!"

He decided it would probably be best to cooperate with the little brat and tossed his weapon aside. His buddies likely heard the gunshot and would be here any minute.

Ryan was going to say something, but his mind was starting to become a blur. The man saw this as hesitation, thought that maybe he was afraid to kill him. "I told you, it' not the same in real life, is it?" He said, reaching for his weapon.

He watched as the young adults eyes started to become blood shot, now thinking that he was on some kind of drug that was just starting to kick in. As he went for his gun, Ryan charged, tackling him to the ground and wrapping his fingers around his neck.

Do it! Strangle him. Kill him!

Ryan obeyed the screaming voice and tightened his grip, watching the guy beneath him suffocate in his grip. The sound yelling came from outside, the others were on their way.

The fucker laying beneath Ryan started smiling, despite not being able to breath. Ryan remove his hands and delivered a hard punch straight to his wind pipe, shattering it in an instant.

As the others entered the building they found their friend alone in the room, laying on the ground as he struggled to take in what air he could. They ran over to check him, one of them dropping to their knees and holding him up.

"Erin, what the fuck happened!?" He yelled, watching his friend turn blue as he suffocated in his arms before he stopped trying to breath, his body going completely limp. "Fuck!" The man yelled, getting back to his feet. "Where are you, you prick!? Come out and face me like a man!"

As much as Ryan would love to, he knew that he had backup and each of them were armed, they'd play dirty. So he would have to respond in kind.

He waited under the vehicle for them to separate once more, much to his luck, they did. They thought going their separate ways would help find him faster and that would be it, but he wasn't going to let that happen. Ryan sneaked his way outside, to wait for his next target. Soon enough the shorter one of the group came out, looking around the building.

Every passing second felt like an hour. Finally he reached the spot where Ryan wanted him, out of sight of the others. He pulled a line of guitar wire out of his pocket and threw it over the guys head, wrapping it around his neck and sawing at his throat.

"I can't remember a lot pass that point, it's all very hazy, it was like I wasn't in control of my own body anymore." He explained to the night princess who just stared at him in a mixture of shock and sadness, just watching his frozen expressionless face as he spoke

She didn't want to press too much, and to be completely honest, she wasn't sure how much more she wanted to hear. But she had already pulled the pin on this grenade, she would have to put it to use now. "Is there anything you can remember."

"Well..."

Ryan rested just outside of the carnage he had created, sitting on his knees in the cool night air, listening as the signs of an oncoming storm approached, letting everything that had just transpired sink in. They were dead, all of them. In his mind he had done what was right, he avenged his brother's death. But, even when all of this was done, his heart still hurt at the loss of someone so close to him. At least now those bastards wouldn't be able to make anyone else go through what he was.

A sudden familiar flashing of lights entered his vision and when he looked up he found himself face to face with a police car. It stopped just a few feet from him and out came a woman dressed in what appeared to be a black military combat suit. "Well, well, well. Ryan Curtis, right?"

He didn't say anything, just stared up at the woman. He could have sworn he had seen her somewhere before.

She leaned closer to get a better look at him. "My god, it is you! I remember you back in high school. The kid that everyone accused of bringing weapons and bombs to school." She said with a laugh. "How did I know that some day I'd end up finding you like this one day?" She asked with a cocky attitude.

"Probably because you were an ignorant bitch who judged people without knowing them." He explained. "You're self-opinionated, you're ignorant, and above all you're a fucking cunt."

She nodded and walked over to him before grabbing her pistol and slamming it into the side of his head, causing him to fall down into the dirt. "You wanna run that by me again, sweetie?"

He was about to respond but was deterred from doing so when she pointed her gun at him. "You have the right to remain silent, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of-"

"Just shut up and let me grab my bag so you can arrest me with more than enough evidence to put me away for life." He said to her, knowing very well that once he was sent to prison for all of this that he was never getting back out. A small price to pay for family.

"Put you away!" She said with a laugh. "You're funny! No, baby. You just killed six men, they're not going to lock you up, they're gonna put you in the chair." Hearing this made his eyes widen. Prison was one thing, but death was another. "Well, if they still used that. Now they're gonna strap you down and stick you with a needle. Either way, I'm still gonna enjoy watching your ass die."

She got down on her knees so she would be face to face with the rising, soon-to-be, corpse. "Do me a favor too and don't bother running. I'll catch you. Now what was that about a bag of evidence?"

He sighed and rose to his feet, her doing the same and keeping her gun on him. Ryan walked over to the vehicle he had used to literally crush two of the guys earlier and pulled out a single-strapped backpack, once he had it he opened it and grabbed his brother's gun that he had somehow managed to drop earlier and placed it into the largest pocket.

Here he was now, after just finishing his work to making sure his brother's death wouldn't be in vain, about to be sentenced to death. Redemption was a hell of a thing if you looked at it from every angle, as well as being sure to observe the consequences; something he did not do thoroughly.

Ryan made his way over to the woman and threw the bag over his shoulder. "Uh, uh, no. Not happening. Give it here."

He sighed and grabbed the strap.

Now!

Once he was sure he had a firm grip, he swung the bag at her, knocking her in the head. Inside of this thing were a couple of clothes, yes, but mostly tools. The hard structures from within the cloth carrying bag struck her right to the dome with enough force to knock her down.

Ryan took advantage of this opportunity and ran out into the woods. The forest was dense with trees and wet leaves. The sound of rain and thunder echoing in the distance as a storm tore through the area.

"Stop or I'll shoot!" The officer he had just struck yelled as she started chasing him.

"I'll stop running when you stop being a cunt-odactyl!" Ryan shouted, running as fast as his legs could carry him.

As he ran the woman behind him fired two shots in his direction, intentionally missing. "I said freeze, dirt-bag!"

"And I said fuck you, bitch!" He shouted to her before finally coming up on a clearing and being forced to stop. "Holy shit!" He shouted, stopping just short of a cliff. He leaned forward to see if there was a way down, but sadly that trip would be very muddy and likely lead to a few hundred foot swan-dive straight into the raging waters below.

Damn... He thought to himself. That would have sucked.

The woman behind him came to a halt, holding her gun up only a few feet from his head. "Hands up, now!" She demanded, taking an internal sigh of relief when he actually complied. She walked up behind him, grabbing a set of hand cuffs strapped to her side. "I told you I'd catch you, Ryan. You can't run away from me forever."

"It wasn't you I was running from, it was the death-sentence. But, seeing how I'm a little fucked right now, how about you do me a solid and just pull the trigger." He said as his eyes scanned the area for anything he could use to escape.

"Sorry, buddy," She started, grabbing one of his hands and pulling it behind his back, "but I'd rather watch you suffer. I know the needle of death thing doesn't scare you, but just the fact that you've finally lost is enough to get me off. And I plan to ride it out for as long as I can."

Don't do it.

Ryan took one last glance at the edge of the cliff. "Sorry sweetheart, but I never lose." He quickly used his free arm to elbow the woman behind him, breaking her nose the second he made contact.

Don't do it!

The woman stumbled and took a step back, giving her almost-prisoner more than enough of a chance to execute his plan of escape. The only part that sucked about it was that if it didn't kill him, it was gonna hurt a lot.

Goddammit!

Once he knew he was free from her grip he took a few steps forward and jumped, letting gravity do the work for him. He looked down and stared at the fast approaching waves beneath him and closed his eyes.

Ryan's body hit the water with a loud smack.

"That's when I heard your voice." he said, causing Luna to look up at him. "While I was literally drowning in those waters, I could hear your voice. You saved me."

She didn't know what to say, not just about saving him, but about any of it. He went through all of that because some punks killed a man that he considered family.

"So what do you think?" He asked, wondering if her opinion of him changed, if it had he hopped it would be for the better, but he highly doubted it.

Morally, she knew that what he did was wrong, but in the times that she grew up in as well as the things she would have done if she were in the same situation, could she blame him? No, she couldn't. "I think that what you did was wrong, but honestly I can't say I blame you." Ryan shot her a curious look. "You're a good person, Ryan, I can see it in your eyes. You've just gone through something that not many can say they have. You did what you did out of anger, but if somepony were to hurt my sister, or take her from me...I'd probably do something similar." She confessed.

He couldn't help but notice a growing wetness in his eyes, but he quickly wiped it away. "You really cared about him; you have so much love in your heart, but every time you give it to something it's taken from you." Reading him was becoming somewhat easier with each passing day. He would open up more to her and confide in her and she could understand his pain.

She cupped his cheek and made sure that he was looking at her when she said this. "Ryan, don't let your past haunt you. You did what you had to and if you ever need anything, I'll be right here. I will never leave you."

Her words brought a strange comfort to him, like he knew she was being truthful, that she really would be there no matter what. It reminded him of Danny. When ever Ryan needed something, truly needed something, Danny would be there for him. He would do anything for him, even risk his own life to save him. He could feel that comfort with Luna, but he would be damned if he let something happen to her.

Ryan took a silent vow at this moment to protect her no matter what. He's not gonna let another persons coffin rest on his conscience; he wasn't going to lose anyone ever again, especially her.

Optional- Read this s**t!

Optional- Read this s**t!

Gamer91: Could you tell us about the time you had a threesome with Luna and Celestia in detail?

Ryan stood atop of the Canterlot castle. He was wearing a pair of dirty blue jeans, a white t-shirt, and had a red flannel tucked into his pants. A recent dispute between the princesses and an ambassador of Yakyakistan led to a rather nasty outcome. Repairs were more than needed on the inside, but the roof somehow managed to sustain some damage as well. He wiped a large amount of sweat he was accumulating from his face before cracking open a bottle of water and pouring it over his head.

Fuck it's hot!

He decided it was time for a short break and planted his rear on the slanted roof, using a board he had nailed in place beneath his feet to keep him from sliding down. After taking a look at the ponies he was working with he noticed that they were all stopping to take a breather as well. No harm no foul.

Placing a hand to his chin, he thought about how to answer the question presented. "So you want me to tell you about how my three-way with the royal sisters went huh?"

Pretty sure that's what they just asked, dipshit.

"Well, I could tell you...but then Luna would probably cut my nuts off. She already made me swear to never bring it up again." He said with an all too serious look, "I will tell you this though. Celestia really knows how to move that flank of hers. And when they double teamed me while I was tied to the bed." He could do nothing but smile and chuckle at the memories. "Fuck, that was a good ass night."

He suddenly felt eyes on him from every direction. Turning his attention back to the workers he quickly took notice that they were all staring at him with a mixture of shock and curiosity.

Ryan mentally cursed himself for opening his mouth as the swarm of stallions charged him, demanding that he give them the story of that sweet, painful, deliciously hot night.

Fuck my life!

The oracle: So Ryan, how do you think Discord keeps cheating when it comes to your drinking games?

After a hard day of work and being bombarded by his fellow workers, Ryan decided that he had earned himself a few drinks. He went back to his favorite drinking buddy in an attempt to beat finally him. They took a seat at their table and began another round. About an hour in Ryan was beyond shitfaced and could barely tell the floor from a block of cheese.

He looked toward something with an awkward stare, his right eye looking forward and his left eye looking right. "Look, I done...I dunno how she's doing it. But, I know she's cheating!"

Discord chuckled at the humans behavior. He poured them another round of shots and passed one to Ryan. "Oh, my dear friend. I would never do such a thing to you. I would feel absolutely horrible if I were to cheat against someone so close to me." He said in mock sadness at Ryan's accusation.

Bullshit!

"Don't ya try and play yer fffuckin' games with me, lad!' Ryan yelled in a slurred Irish accent. "I'll come over there and...and I...and I'll...fuck, I forgot." Ignoring his own threat Ryan grabbed the shot and took it like a pro before promptly falling out of his seat and landing pretty hard on the floor.

Discord laughed at Ryan and a chalk board appeared in front of him. One half of the board was labeled Ryan while the other was labeled Discord. Ryan's half of the board was completely blank, but Discord's was covered in tally marks all the way to the bottom.

He added another tally under his name and the board vanished. "That's six hundred and forty-eight to zero. You really need to step up your game."

The only response Discord got was the sound of Ryan throwing up on his floor and then a pattern of soft snoring. The god's face cringed a bit at the sound of the human emptying it's stomach. "Huh, so he wasn't lying about his problem with vodka. But, I already knew that. Oh well, guess I'll just have to keep those ones to myself from now on."

His attention turned to the audience and he flashed an odd smile. "Go on now, This part of the story is over. Next question!"

CaioCoia: Ryan, how was going Silver?! And did you meet the Spike the Dragon?! I want to read the details of everything you did in 200 years. Even the battle drinks with Rainbow Dash and Discord. And did you have a picture of yourself? Show us please.

Ryan sat down in a black leather lazy boy chair, scratching a six o'clock shadow he was growing. There were a number of ways to answer these questions, but most of them might make him seem a bit weird. "Okay, I'm going to have to explain this one real quick."

He leaned back and took a breath to recollect his thoughts. "After about ten years of watching Silver grown into a beautiful young changeling I decided that I really didn't want lose her." He paused, but could find no better way to explain this. "I talked to Luna...and she told me that having sex with any immortal will in turn make you into an immortal. I told her I know that, that's why I came to you. Then she emphasized the word any."

His brow raised.

See where we are going with this? Say it anyway, help all the stupid people.

A sigh escaped his lips as he decided to continue. "I asked Luna to do it and she was really uncomfortable with the idea so...I slept with this thing that I had considered my sister for the longest time."

No worse than what your cousin did to us. Silver was at least willing...and strangely pleased with the idea...

"To make matters allot more weird, she cannot sleep with anyone else now without them becoming immortal. So when she's in heat I HAVE to be the one that she falls back on."

In more ways than one.

"Moving on!"

He thought about the first time he had met Spike. It was a shocker at first, seeing how every story he heard about dragons from this world all pointed to something bad. "My first reaction when I met Spike could have been less awkward. I couldn't stop eyeing him, it was weird. Everypony keeps saying that dragons are greedy little shits that grow to the size of mountains. I didn't wanna look away from him for too long out of fear of losing my wallet."

Ryan laughed at the memory for a second. "After we did some talking he turned out to be a pretty cool guy. And, since he's not as greedy as other dragons, he's not going to age really at all. Who knows, maybe he'll live as long as me."

"Back when RD was still around, she and I would go at it with drinking games. I won those, no problem. The only time I ever lose is when that cheating asshole shows up. He's doing something, I know he is! I just can't figure out what..."

He reached behind the chair and pulled out his old traveling bag. Its exterior showed a great deal of aging; loose strings, a few holes and tears, a broken zipper. After digging his hand through the bag he pulled out a really fancy looking phone. "I used to have pictures of myself in here. But this old thing hasn't worked in many years. I used its remaining battery life to take a photo with Luna and Silver. Sorry, but I guess you're shit out of luck unless you can find some sort of description of how I look and draw me."

GameAssassin: Ryan, how'd you handle all of Luna's crazed heats? Also did you ever get to know the elements better and how often did you mind fuck Twilight?

Celestia, Luna, and Ryan were all sitting at the dinning room table enjoying a small meal. The meal mostly consisted of salads and various other fruits and vegetables. The human was the only one who had anything out of place. A steaming hot steak with a side of pineapple and a glass of wine. The big sister sat at the head of the table while Luna moved from her usual spot to sit beside Ryan, who was just to the left of Celestia.

Luna began blushing deeply while her sister let out an amused giggle. "Please don't answer that." She begged to her mate.

Ryan couldn't help but smile at her misery. "It's really allot more simple than you'd think. One of her favorite things for me to do is taking my-"

The human was silenced as Luna pressed her hand over his mouth. "Next question!"

He pulled her hand way with a chuckle. "I did get to know the other elements pretty well. They would stop by here every so often and in my free time I occasionally went down to Ponyville to see them. Best part; I got to stay with Twilight during my visits. Needless to say, she's a completely different mare now."

Luna, how's the sisterly prank war? Any favorites? Will you and Ryan ever try for kids???

Celestia and Luna flashed each other a challenging smile. Pulling pranks on each other was one of their favorite things to do, no matter how out of this world some of them came to be. Some of them were even just plain mean. "We do indulge in such spoils every now and again." Luna began, "I believe my favorite was when I casted a spell on one of my sisters cakes to make her gain a copious amount of weight. After the first bite she could have truly been mistaken for the sun itself."

The solar princess seemed humiliated by the thought of that particular prank. After that stories and rumors about her having a large flank seemed to spread like a wild fire. In reality, she did have a nice looking ass, but it was not as large as some claimed. "I prefer the one where I had you lactating like a cow for six months."

Now it was Luna's turn to feel embarrassed. No matter what she did she just could not get her breasts to stop shooting milk out of her nipples like a fire hose. Okay, that's a bit exaggerated, but that's what it felt like.

Ryan just sat back and listened with a shit eating grin on his face. This was way too entertaining for him to just interrupt. In fact, he wanted to hear more about their prank wars. He knew that they would do things like this every so often, but lately the ones Celestia did to Luna just made things more fun for him. There was one time when she made Luna's flank and chest double in size.

Heaven truly was just beyond the veil.

Their amusement came to a grinding halt at the next question though. Ryan and Luna glanced at each other and had an odd look about them. "Should I-?"

"No, I'll do it." Ryan cleared his throat before speaking. "I have never been the biggest fan of children, especially infants. Even after two hundred plus years I can't seem to get around to the idea of having them. Luckily, in order for us to have kids it requires a spell to make us genetically compatible. So caution doesn't need to be too high."

Thank...whatever deity is watching over us right now.

"Silver was more than enough child for me, so I think I'll just leave it at that."

Luna shrugged, "Honestly, I would love to bear a child with my mate one day. But, if he's uncomfortable with it, I can wait. We have all the time in the world to reproduce together."

"Keep counting down sweetheart, cause it aint happening."

"Come on, Ryan. I'm sure once the child came around you would love it dearly." Luna playfully begged.

"I feel like you would make a great father." Celestia teased, knowing how much this topic annoyed him.

"Give me another few hundred years to think about it."

Celestia, will you ever get over your cake addiction or will you continue your cake tyranny on all cake kind!?!?

Ryan was sipping from his glass of blackberry wine just as this question popped up. His body convulsed and the purple liquid immediately shot out of his mouth and nose. In the midst of his choking there was an occasional laugh finding its way out of his throat.

Luna was much luckier in this aspect. She followed Ryan's example, but with her mouth free of anything that could be used as a projectile.

Lucky bitch! It's funny, but it hurts!

Celestia froze in her seat with her eyes widened to the limit. To think that someone other than Ryan or her sister would know about that and have the gull to call her on it. She makes one mistake with getting caught eating a cake and suddenly everypony thinks she's obsessed.

Those living with her know better, but still choose to tease her about it relentlessly. She let out an annoyed sigh, "I am not a cake tyrant. Yes, I enjoy a few pastries here and there. But, I do not have any sort of addiction, nor do I stuff my face with them as the papers have so claimed."

Ryan managed to calm himself down enough to defend Celestia, but couldn't seem to wipe the amused look from his face. "I gotta back her up on this guys, sorry. Come on though, if she really was stuffing her face with cake constantly then she would probably be a big fat fuck. Trust me, she's got a great body. A body that does not come with inhaling pastries by the dozens."

"Thank you, Ryan." Celestia said with a smile.

"But what she does consume seems to go right to that flank of hers."

Her smile dropped and her horn began to illuminate. Ryan yelped as his head was suddenly forced down and smacked against the table by an unseen force.

"Ow, bitch!"

YOU FUCKING CUN-