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                       Re-Enlistment                       
                -by Queen Sanguine Dreams-                 
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                   Chapter 1: Awakening                    
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Chapter 1: Awakening
Darkness. That was the first thing that struck me as I woke from my daze. That was quickly followed by all of my body deciding to impale itself with thousands of tiny swords in an effort to make sure the nerves were still working.
"Aaah!"
"Calm down, you're safe now." A reassuring and soft voice said somewhere to my left, as I tried to come to a halt. My body was still protesting its existence as I tried to stand at attention and find the source of the voice.
"Listen to my voice. That's it, perfect." the voice said, my vision still determined to be absent in my time of need.
I was then further assaulted by tingling sensations as my head was grabbed in a magical field of energy. This time it was my eyes that decided that they too, wanted to be stabbed by an army of breezies. Painfully blinking and shaking my head as I was released, my vision came back in a strange rosy hue. I may have been struck by a rainbow, but I remember without fault that the world was NOT that color. My vision returned to normal as I looked towards a well lit mare.
"Your eyes will take some getting used to, but don't worry about it all that much. It's normal!" the voice cheerfully explained, as I noted the turquoise mare with black and sky blue hair and the most wonderful golden eyes.
"Charmed." she said, holding out a hoof to me.
"Pardon?"
"My name, silly. I'm called Charmed." she withdrew her hoof with a smile, and I took the opportunity to get my bearings.
I was in a large chamber, in some kind of cave with a rediculously high ceiling. Behind Charmed were more unicorns, along with members of the Royal Guard. Pegasai, Unicorns and Earth Ponies all present, as well as... wait.
What kind of pony is THAT?
"Oh Luna, what happened to me?!" A pony dressed in the armor of the Night Guard had wailed. His body was a dark grey, with his mane a two-tone combination of grey and blue. His eyes held slitted pupils with a color of bright yellow. All of this would have been strange, excepting that his wings now had membranes in place of feathers. Leathery bat wings.
I then took stock of my own figure, and gasped. I too was given a dark grey coat, replacing the one of white that I had been born with.
"I... I would like a mirror, please." I hesitantly asked the unicorn named Charmed, who had graciously waited for me to come back to reality. Apparently she had been expecting this reaction, as she lifted a strange square mirror from her saddle bags. Below the mirror was a tray filled with various powders and brushes.
"Don't mind the mirror, its for cosmetics!" She explained way too cheerfully for the situation, as I attempted to see myself in the compact mirror.
Slit pupils. They were still purple, thankfully, and my mane had survived it's stay underneath my helmet. The coloration had changed though. What was once an orange and red mane with trim of gold, had become a light grey and purple mane with trim of silver. I smiled, as I didn't really mind the change in mane coloration, but that gave me a whole new subject to be concerned about.
I had FANGS.
"Aaah!"
Charmed had found me hiding behind a stone pedestal, holding another of the Night Guard that had been frozen into a statue by the Elements of Harmony. It was then that I noticed that my own pegasus wings had changed into that of a bat.
"Those are normal, too. We'll be going over all of the changes that you'll have noticed during orientation!" she chirped, still in far too pleasant of a tone for my liking in this situation.
"Miss Charmed, given my current predicament, your voice is far too filled with mirth." I stated sourly, withdrawing myself from behind the statue of a very surprised pegasus of the Night Guard, who would probably be equally surprised to learn that she was no longer, in fact, a pegasus.
"What's not to be excited about? You're coming back to Equestria after a thousand years of imprisonment in stone! There's so much to see, and to do!" She continued, with her typical mantra of 'all is wonderful and right in the world'. Then I noticed a small bit of information that she had stated previously.
"Hold a moment. One thousand years of imprisonment, you said?" I asked, holding a hoof in an effort to stop her continuous barrage of cheer.
"Yes sir eee! One thousand years of being turned to stone and stored in a cave, so nopony or creature could harm your entombed souls. It's pretty neat, if you ask me. You're all like living history!" It was at this point that I noticed her cutie mark was that of an Egriffian mummy in a casket, holding a scythe and some other artifact in another claw.
"You're... an Archaeologist, I presume?"
"Wait, you're telling me that there was Archaeology way back in your time? That means that theres even more ancient cultures that nopony has ever even seen! This is amazing! Im going to tell everypony all abou..." She ranted, hopping around and running from pony to pony with her newfound 'discovery' as I tuned her out and began to experiment with my new wings. After all, if this was to be the rest of my life, I might as well get used to the fact that I had fangs... and was part bat.
That would have to wait for later, however. I was still in a fairly large cave with row upon row of statued Night Guard. I wondered if I would be able to recognize the faces of any of them, as I was walking towards the other guard that had been 'thawed' for lack of a better term, with me. I found him hiding behind a statue, as I had been, and joined the Royal Guard and accompanying archaeologist that were attempting to coax him from his fortified position.
"Would you tell us your name?" The archaeologist mare asked, as she inched closer to the frightened guard.
"What's the point?! Everypony I know is dead, theres no way that you'd know who I am! It doesn't matter who I am anymore!" The guard wailed, accidently biting his lip with his fangs in anger and letting out a squeak of pain. He wasn't taking the changes as well as I had been, but I decided to do what I could to help him out.
"I might know your name. Would you share yours? I am Novel Thought, Lieutenant of Luna's Night Guard, Everfree Watch." I held out a hoof to the cowering night guard, hoping my rank and officer's training would help in this kind of situation. I've seen guards come back from fighting Manticores with less jitters than this, and it was worrying to think that not everypony that returned from their forced slumber would adjust as quickly as I had.
"L-Lieutenant Thought?" He stammered, before grabbing my hoof and righting himself, making sure his armor was in order before I stopped him with a hoof on his shoulder.
"It is alright, Night Guard. This isn't the time for drill and ceremony. Would you share your name? It can't do to simply call you 'Night Guard' as there is more than just the two of us." I moved to stand beside him, and rested a hoof on his back in order to point with my other hoof at the rows of frozen Night Guard in the chamber we occupied.
"Every one of those statues is another Night Guard, like us. We're all going to need to take some time to adjust, not only to our new...forms, but to Equestria as it stands." I was doing my best to keep a calm and reassuring demeanor, but I was worried beyond belief at what would be expected of us as soon as we were free of this cave. Or, to make matters worse, if we were going to be held accountable for our actions a millennia after the fact.
"Y-you mean t-that... All of those statues are ponies?" He was shaking, but getting his nerve back slowly and steadily.
"Yes. Every single statue you see, is another pony. Just like us, a Night Guard just like us. We are the first two, and we must set the example for those that follow. We have alot that has been dealt to us, but we will persevere." I let go of the Night Guard, setting myself down to stand next to him with a smile of confidence that I didn't truly feel myself.
"Now then, what should I call you?" I asked, adjusting his helmet from its lopsided perch on his head.
"I am Guard Lantern Light, sir." He stated, more spirit in his voice and swiftly recovering from his display earlier.
"Excellent, Guard Light. You are an exemplar of what the Night Guard looks for in a pony." I left it up to Lantern to determine what that was, exactly.
"Excuse me, Lieutenant Novel Thought?" I turned to see the Royal Guard from before, along with the Archaeologist, standing there in wait.
"Yes?" I asked, returning the salute he had given me as I had turned to see him.
"You and Guard Lantern Light are correct in that you're the first to have been revived. Through the cave entrance, over by Charmed, is the Royal Palace. We will be holding a short briefing about the changes that Equestria has gone through in your absence. We will explain everything as fully as possible at that time. If you would like to stay, to help other Guard with their return to the living, it would be most appreciated. The choice is yours, sir."
"Ooh! And we get to ask you all kinds of questions abo-" The archaeologist had started, before being silenced by the hoof of the royal guard being stuck into her mouth.
"Not now, Dusty. They've -just- woken up. Ask them later, when they're not coming out of a thousand year slumber."
"Thank you, Guard...?" I asked, searching for a name.
"I am Sergeant Rising Sun." he responded with a slobbery salute, as 'Dusty' wiped her mouth of drool. To Sun's credit, he didn't flinch when he realized that his hoof was covered in saliva.
"Many thanks, Sergeant Sun." I returned the salute, and told Lantern Light to continue to the briefing room without me.
For a few hours afterwards, I went through the same process as I had with Lantern. Some were more like myself, in that they did not show signs of panic or mental breakdown. The majority, however, were very distraught. Some even took to the skies, only to realize with painful clarity that they were in a cave, and come crashing back down to the floor. Sergeant Sun was a Unicorn that specialized in light and healing magic, being of great help to those who would have suffered injury in their panic.
Finally complete, and our numbers having been calmed down and martialed to the briefing room, A Royal Guard Captain came through the large wooden doors. He was a Unicorn of stocky build, with snow white coat with blue hooves, three tone mane of light to dark blues, and a deep blue shield cutie mark with a pink star adorning the center, with three sparkles above it.
"Welcome to Canterlot, everypony." The captain said with a smile, looking amongst the gathered and still worried Night Guards.
"I am Captain Shining Armor, of the Canterlot Royal Guard. You all will be staying here for a time, as you are brought up to speed regarding the changes of custom and policy in Equestria following your thousand years of imprisonment." This started some murmurs in the gathered crowd, but was soon silenced by their remembered discipline.
"I understand that some of you have voiced concerns about what has happened following the events of Nightmare Moon, and I can assure you that nopony here will be punished any further for their involvement during that period of conflict. Princess Celestia has decided that a thousand years trapped in stone is more than she would have ever given. We ask that for the first week of your stay here in the Royal Palace that you not travel outside the Palace grounds. We've yet to publicly announce your collective return, and would like to keep this very hush-hush for now."
That seemed odd to me, but I suppose that could just be written up to the fact that there had been a millennia since I was even familiar with any sort of policy.
"You will be staying in the Guest Rooms of the palace, until more permanent living arrangements can be made, following the planned announcement on Wednesday. Oh, for those of you wondering, it is currently Saturday." There were a few comments about what year it was, but they were overlooked as Captain Armor continued his speech. "Princess Luna has also been freed from her own banishment on the moon, and her corruption by Nightmare Moon. She too is undergoing the same process you all will be, and asks that you remain strong for Equestria and the ponies that you protect, should you wish to continue serving in the Night Guard."
"Does that mean that we'll have a thousand years of pay to collect?" I heard a voice whisper to my left, before the clang of an armored hoof smacking a breastplate was heard.
"Don't be an idiot! We're lucky they didn't punish the lot of us for being part of attempted Regicide and a coup!" Another voice, to my far left had hissed at the first guard, as my attention returned to the Captain.
"...and we of the Royal Guard hope that you will ask us any questions you may have. If we cannot answer your questions, we recommend visiting the Royal Library in the eastern wing of the Palace. Thank you for attending. Dismissed!" He finished with a salute, and was answered with the resounding beat of a hundred hooves smacking their breastplate, before most realized that the captain had raised his hoof to level with his eyebrow.
"Heh... At ease, everypony. There's a lot of changes to go over, so don't beat yourself up about it." He smiled, before leaving the room with two Royal Guards in tow. The remaining Guard was lead to their rooms, the sheer number of 'guests' forcing us to take four to a room. Given that there was only one bed to each room, this caused a few problems. Luckily, most were too tired to be truly concerned about being in a mixed gender pile on the large beds. The beds themselves were more posh and soft than the military bunks they were used to. I later found out that some had passed out on contact, armor and all.
Author's Note
Huzzah, stories. Yep, the OC and myself look the same.  
If this gains in popularity, then ill have another reason to   
Keep writing this story! Ill continue regardless, because  
Writing is fun, but if you enjoy the story be sure to let  
Me know!

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                    Chapter 2: Yawning                     
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Chapter 2: Yawning
I awoke to find myself wrapped in the hooves of Lantern Light, snoring quietly and still in his armor. I had taken the time to clean and polish my armor before I slept, but it quickly proved pointless as being frozen in stone made degradation impossible.I honestly didn't mind Lantern Light's embrace, but It's not exactly ethically sound for a superior to be cuddling with a subordinate, not even to mention that we were both stallions. It was then that I noticed his helmet had come off, and that during the night, my coat had become soft and fluffy after being freed from the press of my armor. There were still two others in the room with us, both being mares. They were somewhat more reserved in their sleeping position, one of them managing to get under the covers before falling asleep, and the other had set their armor aside and collapsed on top of the covered mare.
Being squeezed tightly by Lantern, who was thankfully still asleep, I realized that I should probably get sorted before a thousand years of libido caught up with me. I was able to lift his hooves from their place around my torso, and found that my wings worked much in the way that I would've expected my pegasus wings to perform. I did my best to quietly maneuver around the spacious circular chamber of the guest quarters, and landed next to a tall mirror to get a better look at myself.
My hooves had been exposed from their coat, revealing an even darker shade of grey. I also noticed that my ears had fluffy tufts of fur inside and atop of them. My fangs were unsurprisingly sharp, and I wondered If I would need to eat meat now. I hoped not, because that would mean a whole new slew of awkwardness between the three pony species and batponies In general.
Deciding that putting my armor on would cause too much noise, I opened the door of the Guest Room in search of food. I was surprised to find two Royal Guard standing watch outside, and they directed equal surprise upon finding out what they were guarding  
in the first place.
"Eee!" I squeaked, before covering my throat in confusion as to why I didn't shout like before.
"Aaaah!" The guards blurted in unison, before casting worried looks at another and returning their gaze to my confused self.
"We heard that there were special guests, but It'd never occurred to me that it would be some kind of mutated frea-" One of the guards started, before being rightly smacked upside the head by the other guard.
"You better've not been about to say what I think you were gonna say, because It would be a bucking shame to have to report that you insulted a royal guest to the Captain, Halberd." The guard glowered, lowering his hoof with a huff before turning to me.
"Sorry for the scare there, we weren't given much information so we got startled. I'm Tower Shield." He offered a hoof, and I shook it after a moment's pause.
"Do you know..." I trailed off, my voice in a higher register than I was used to. "Do you know where I could get some food?"
My voice had become alot more squeaky, and this was concerning.
"Yes, Sir. Just walk down the right side of this hallway, and take another right. That should lead you in the direction of the Dining Hall." Tower Shield said with a smile, returning to his post after giving a warning look at Halberd.
"Oh!" I literally chirped, before lowering my voice to try again. "Would you direct the others in the room to the Dining Hall as well? They're still asleep and I didn't want to disturb their rest."
"Oh course, Sir." Halberd saluted, and I resumed course to food-land.
Along the way, I made a point of testing out my voice. Trying every pitch I used to be able to complete, I was both dismayed that I was unable to mimic some of the voices I was able to in the past, but also relieved that I would be able to try out new voices to pass the time. Remembering a particular mare that had an infamous reputation, before also realizing that she was now long dead, I decided to repeat her voice in memory as best I could. I was ecstatic in finding that I could now copy it perfectly if I used a slightly deeper tone of my new high pitched and squeaky voice.
"Oh yeah?" I asked nopony, attempting to get the sultry, playful and youthful tone of the 'Mare of the Night' just perfect.
"Oh yeah. Oh Yeah! Oh Yeah?! Oh Yeeeaaaahhh." I swallowed, trying to lock in the vocal arrangement of the voice after every repetition, before rounding the corner to come face to face with a very disturbed guard team.
The guards both attempted to stare blankly at me, but the blushes on their faces spoke volumes about what they had thought was approaching them down the hallway. Absently, I wondered what my own blush would look like as my face burned, but I took this opportunity to have a bit of fun. I walked slowly up to the guard on the right side of the door in my best imitation of an over exaggerated mare's gait. I leaned in close to the guard's twitching left ear as he tried to stand like a statue.
"Oh yeah?" I whispered in the voice, causing the guard on the left side of the door to burst into laughter at his partner's obvious discomfort and intensifying blush as he covered his face with a hoof. I looked up from the crumpling guard at his partner before letting out a squeaky giggle, and continuing into the Dining Hall. Thankfully, nopony else had heard the display behind the thick wooden double doors.
I was one of the few early risers, noting that only one of the Night Guard in the hall was in their armor. There was seven of them in total, all around one of the smaller tables that had been moved into the room, in place of the single large table usually reserved for nobility. Trotting up to the cooks that were present, I was about to ask for a meal before I was interrupted by the bleat of a Ram from around the corner
"An' don' -you- tell me nothin' about cookin, ya buckin twit! Ye wouldn' know fine cookin' if it crawled out of a boilin' pot an nipped ye with a claw!" The obviously irate Ram had yelled, drawing attention from those gathered before turning his gaze to me.
"Ye were about te say somethin'?" He asked, his previous anger vaporizing like the stew placed next to him as he turned to look at me.
"Oh! Yer one o' them guests that the Princesses have so graciously decided to run a homeless shelter fer' aren't ye?" He glowered, his previous mood returning.
"Um... I'd just like some stew, if that's alright." I whimpered. A trained officer of the Night Guard, me, whimpering to this Ram chef in an oversized and fairly ridiculous hat.
"Wa's that laddy? I can' hear you over the sound of yer' incessant squeakin', An' that'd be fine as it were, if her Royal Fatness had deigned suitable to tell me what the bloody hay it is that all ye bat ponies'd be eatin' in tha' first place!" He shouted at the ceiling, before hoofing me a bowl of what looked like Apples in a thick... broth? Paste? I don't really know what to call it, honestly.
"Don' ye be givin' me that look! Go sit down 'an eat 'et!" he shouted, as I balanced the stew on my back, using my wings to hold it in place as I hurriedly trotted to the relative safety of my fellow Bat Ponies.
Taking a seat after placing my bowl down, I found the sympathetic looks of the ponies that had braved the angry Ram's wrath before me.
Now... To deal with whatever this strange thing before me is. Normally I wouldn't have given it a second thought, but this didn't smell like any typical Apple based soup-stew-broth thing I've had before. The apples were rainbow colored, and I haven't had the best experience with those, typically.
"If you don't want it, I'll have it." The batpony in armor said, setting down their own bowl that had been licked clean.
"Come on, at least let him have a chance to try it first." A pony to my right said. "It's actually not bad."
Bracing myself, I raised the bowl in my hooves and sipped, getting mostly just the broth...stuff.
By Celestia's Beard...
Before I knew what had happened, the entire bowl was absent of Apple goodness.
"Hurray, I was right!" The cheery voice of my nightmares exclaimed, as I lowered the bowl to come face to face with Charmed.
"Was it good? I bet it was good! I thought of it myself!" Charmed continued, driving those gathered to cover their ears.
"I'm gonna write all of this down in my scientific journal! I'm gonna get a tenure at the university and a pension and..." she exclaimed while hopping away in a world of her own, before shortly returning with a floating stack of books.
"Now, who wants to be the first test subj-- Uh, Aha ha... I mean, who wants to answer questions?" She asked with a suspicious smile.
Everypony looked amongst themselves, and decided to get seconds of the Apple weirdness instead.
***
Later in the day, and with everypony now awake and fed, we were brought to the briefing room of yesterday.
"All right, everypony. Gather around and listen up!" A unicorn mare in a lab coat announced, flanked by more studious types that were moving around all kinds of white boxes on wheels that would emit noise at steady intervals.
"Don't be alarmed. These are medical devices. They won't harm you, so long as you sit still and keep calm. You've been gone for a long time, and need to get vaccinated for all the new diseases and sicknesses that have cropped up. We are also going to decontaminate you, so   
you don't end up bringing a plague back. Nopony wants to deal with the Black Death."
"The what?" whispered Lantern Light to my left.
"Don't ask me, I have no clue." I replied, dropping all of my former professionalism and decorum that I kept while in uniform.
He gave me a worried look, but we both resumed to listening.
"...ust going to feel a small pinch, and the nurses will take care of the rest. These machines here will monitor your vital signs so we will know if you're reacting badly to anything. Now, is anypony allergic to anything?"
Several hooves shot up, and I was guided to a curtained off bed by a nurse pegasus while everypony got to work with their assigned tasks.
"Okay, just hop up on this bed here, and we can get you all fixed up." The mare meekly said, as I made my way to the sterile looking push-bed. She was a light pink, with deep red and white mane, completed with soft orange eyes.
"What is your name?" She asked, clipboard in hoof and pen in mouth as I settled down.
"Lieutenant Novel Thought, Ma'am." I reported.
"Age before imprisonment?" She continued with a slight cringe.
"... Twenty one." I stated eventually, realizing that I was now technically far too old for anypony.
"Well, you already said your rank... Where were you stationed?"
"Everfree Forest." I thought a moment before asking, "That forest is still around, right?"
"Oh yes, but nopony ever goes there. Its really dangerous. Okay, What is your opinion on needles?" she asked, setting her tools aside while grabbing something out of sight.
"What do you mean, like sewing nee--EEE!" I squeaked in alarm, as a sharp pain went into my flank.
"Sorry about that. Some ponies faint or get sick when getting shots. It's just part of getting you ready to go outside, so don't worry about it." She explained, slightly shrinking under my gaze.
I grumbled a bit, before deciding that it wasn't worth anypony's time to get upset about a shot.
"It's alright, Ma'am. Just unexpected. Why would anypony get... Whoa." My vision was getting blurry, and I held my head in my forehooves before I slumped down on the bed.
"It's okay, you're just gonna take a little nap so we can get you through all the procedures without any fuss or pain. See you soon!" Her voice was distant as my senses retreated into the embrace of unconsciousness.

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                   Chapter 3: Stretching                   
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Chapter 3: Stretching
Chapter 3 - Stretching
"...key wakey, rise and shine! Rise and shine, wakey wakey rise and shiiine~" The cheerful voice of death and all that is unholy sang directly into my ear, as I blurrily awoke and shielded my eyes from a bright light fixture blasting my face with its Lummi-monstrosity.
"Charmed, You're disturbing the patient!" A voice hissed in a whisper to my right.
"Wakey wakey~!" She continued.
"I'm up, I'm up!" I groaned, trying to use my wings to shield my eyes, but finding them bound by something.
"  
Ah, Ah! Don't move, silly! We've still got bits of you locked down so you don't hurt yourself!" The cheery Charmed said.
To my right, or left, or whatever direction they were, the nurse that had rendered me unconscious was busy pressing buttons on a large panel. It looked like a larger version of those metal boxes they were wheeling around earlier. Gathering my wits, I looked around to find myself in a white tiled floor, with sky blue ceiling and the walls were painted with a mural of a grassy field. It was all obnoxiously well lit, and hurt my eyes to no end.
"We were running some tests to see how your physiology was changing, given that the transformation into bat pony was stalled substantially by the stone you were imprisoned in. Nearly everypony has been complaining about a higher voice, and huge cravings for apples. Some ponies have even discovered that they aren't allergic to things they used to be allergic to, yet others are finding they don't enjoy the same  
foods they used to. Most of these can be attributed to various psychological stresses of a body transformation but I hypoth--" Charmed was mercifully interrupted in her droning, by my savior of a Nurse pegasus, who I should really ask the name of at some point.
"Charmed, dear, He doesn't need to know all that. Save it for the report so you can talk with somepony that shares your enthusiasm." She chuckled softly, before releasing me from the last few medical braces that held me down. I tried to get up from the bed, but was gently pushed down by the nurse.
"Don't be in such a rush, deary. You've been out for awhile, and we've got to run a few last tests to make sure you're all there, okay?" The nurse reassured me, before taking her hooves off of me and grabbing her clipboard and pen.
"Okay, You've noticed a change in your voice, correct?" I nodded.
"Change in mane, hair and eye color?"
"My eye color is the same, actually." I clairified.
"Interesting..." She scribbled a small note before continuing. "Any changes in Sexual Preference?"
"Se-sexu-I-wha-no-I'm-fine!" I sputtered, suddenly alarmed.
"Hey, hey..." She coo'd, trying to calm me. "It's okay. Nothing to be ashamed of. We've come a long way since Nightmare Moon's time, sweety." I paused for a moment, considering my options.
"Just...just -how- far, are we talking?" I hesitantly asked.
"What do you mean, sweety?" I gulped, before clairifying. "Stallions and... Stallions?"
"Oh, you mean Colt-Cuddlers! Yeah, don't worry about that. Pretty much any relationship is fine nowadays, so long as its consensual and doesn't hurt anypony." She smiled, completely oblivious to the exploding spell she had just dropped onto my lap.
"You..." I trailed, still coming to grips with the change.
"Yep! Don't you worry none, Hun. Everypony is okay wi--" She reassured, before I grabbed her in a crushing hug while crying my eyes out with the slightly annoying sound of squeaks and squee's as I sobbed.
"Um... There there, honey. Its okay now." She offered, but I was far too relieved to even care that she was obviously uncomfortable at my emotional outburst.
Far back, I guess in 'my day', there wasn't an agreement about how attraction worked. Some hypothesized that it was based off of Cutie marks, and that you should find a partner that had one related to yours. Others insisted that it should be completely separate from your own cutie mark, in order to diversify the pony populace. Some insisted that it was based on gender, and that only Mares should go with Stallions or the Wendigos would come back and freeze Equestria again. Others had gone so far as to imprison or condemn those that went against their beliefs, or drive them from the safety of their village in order to 'protect the foals' from the 'aberrant' ponies.
To say to me, that all of that was over, and I could live without worry about that kind of thing, was like telling a wrongly convicted inmate on death row that they were to be set free, that they could see their family again and live their lives without worry once more. I don't know how long I held on to the nurse, but when I was finally freed of the tears of relief I could shed, the nurse was soaked and looking very   
uncomfortable.  
"All better?" She asked, letting out a breath of relief as I released her from my bear hug.  
"Y-yeah..." I squeaked, wiping my eyes and sniffing.  
"Okay deary, just one last question. Are you ready?" After a moment of gathering myself, I replied with a "Yes."
"Do you wish to continue your service in the Night Guard?"
***
I stood outside in the sun, accompanied by a squad of eight more armored bat ponies of the Night Guard, as we waited in a group for the rest of the ponies of our 'batch' to get ready. The nine of us included the mares from our room, which I had learned were called Night Breeze and Moon Sight. We five were designated to be a patrol group, with myself being the leader. Lantern Light and Moon Sight were in agreement that I would be the leader, but Night Breeze was too busy having fun at my expense to conclude with the discussion.
"Oh yeah! Oh Yeah! Oh Yeaaaaahhh!" Night Breeze attempted, her pitch was slightly off key but it was a good overall attempt at my display from earlier. Apparently she had been woken from her sleep by my antics, and the guards posted outside of our  
door had seen fit to spread the tale of my mimicry throughout the Royal and Night Guard.
"Oh yeah?" I challenged, to which she replied with another "Oh Yeah!"
Several faces were blushing, their attention drawn to our increasingly loud display of uncouth behavior, before a loud attention getting  
cough was heard over our voices.
"AHEM." Captain Shining Armor cleared his throat a bit too harshly, causing him to cough a bit while his voice recovered.
"Well then, Now that -that- is in order, we can begin. Or... no we can't. There's only nine of you." He looked down at some metal attached to his wrist. "Well, That sort of messes up scheduling, now doesn't it?" He asked rhetorically.
"Can we get some of that tasty apple stuff again, boss?" Night Breeze asked with a raised hoof, completely out of order and lacking  
in the discipline of rules that made the Night Guard a professional force.
"Huh? Oh, yeah. I suppose it's almost lunch time anyway. Come back here at..." He looked at the wrist metal again. "About half hour after one?" He nodded in confirmation of his own plan, and gave a salute to the few ponies gathered before swiftly jumping from the stage and into the castle.
"Well..." Was all I could say to that. Apparently there have been -massive- changes in how things are run in present time.
"Well lets get some food!" Night Breeze cheered, pumping a hoof in the air and flying off to the kitchens with a big smile.
"I don't think she's right in the head." Moon Sight bluntly stated, before flying after her guard partner.
"Hey Lieutenant, want to get lunch?" Lantern Light asked, as I tried to hide a blush with a loud cough while turning my head away.
"Y-yes!" I nearly shouted, far too eagerly and abruptly.
"You okay?"
"Perfectly alright!"
"You sure? Your face is gettin all purple around the cheeks."
"Yep! Fine!" I squeaked, my face growing hotter.
"'Cause it looks like you're choking, Lieutenant."
"Don't worry about me! I'll meet you in the chow hall." I said from behind a hoof, trying to make it appear like I was adjusting a strap on my helmet somehow.
"Riiiight..." Lantern trailed before taking flight to the kitchen.
Well, apparently my blush is purple. Good to know.
***
After a thoroughly awkward lunch, peppered with calls of 'Oh yeah!', We returned to formation outside of the palace proper, next to the hedge garden that had been crafted into an expansive maze. We were at a full hundred guards again, with a few complaining of soreness from the injections they had received. I was thankfully free from said comfortableness, and stood attentively while putting on my best 'I am an Officer' expression.
"Lieutenant, You look goofy as a minotaur in a tiara." Lantern said, making me deflate my puffed chest back to normal.
"What's goofy about it?" I asked, slightly exasperated that nopony had ever bothered to tell me in my years of service.
"Lieu, just look in the mirror when you do that. Honestly all I'm gonna say."
"Lieu? Why not Novel, or Thought?" I asked.
"Because you're my C.O. and It would be strange If we were on a first name basis?"
"Um... right." I finished meekly.
Captain Shining Armor came back from wherever it is that Royal Guard Captains go to, with a messy mane and his armor missing a strap. A few murmurs of concern were heard, followed by a fairly loud 'Oh Yeaaaahh' in the background, causing a burst of laughter.
"Alright everypony, that's enough. Let's get on with the briefing." Shining said, adjusting his armor and hiding his mane under a helmet that he grabbed off of a nearby guard's head.
"Now that we've got you immunized to present day afflictions and the like, We're going to be up front. You've all been asked if you would like to continue serving with the Night Guard, and every one of you agreed to continue your service. That kind of showing of unity and loyalty is immensely appreciated by the Princesses, and Princess Luna herself offers her heartfelt gratitude. She was going to meet with you all today,  
but a situation had cropped up in a nearby town and she was forced to remedy that situation. She says that if you're the same guards she knew before, that you would be understanding of the situation."
A wave of quiet agreement was heard through the ranks of the gathered batponies, as Shining Armor continued.
"Members of the Nobility have expressed concern as to whether or not you are all truly freed from the corruption of Nightmare Moon, and we would like to give you the opportunity to undergo some magical examinations to be certain of this fact. I'm sure it will do good to ease any lingering doubts you might have, as well as those of the stuffy Aristo ponies that like to meddle in things."
This earned a few squeaky giggles of appreciation, as he finished his speech.
"Now, This examination will be lead by Charmed, and yes, I share sympathy for your plight. It should be relatively quick and painless, and no, not the kind of 'light pinch' painless like last time. Truly painless, or you have my permission to get cross with the unicorn treating you. Should you have any further concerns or questions, feel free to ask Charmed or one of the Royal Guard here."
He finished his statement and received polite applause, as the dreaded unicorn named Charmed took the stage.
"Hey everypony! Or should I call you Everybat? Everybatty?" she rubbed her chin with a free hoof absently, before casting the thought aside and continuing.
"Okay Everybatty, listen up! We're gonna be doing some soul searching here in a little bit, and I don't mean poetically. This is a really intensive scan done by the best mages that Equestria and the Crystal Empire have to offer, so don't worry! We're gonna be scanning your soul for any hint of Discordant magic that may be lingering around. Also, we have no idea how to revert you back to your normal pony forms, but we're working on it for those of you that want your old bodies back! The scan itself should be relatively painless, unless we do find something that needs to get yanked out of you. We'll let you know if that has to happen, but its very -very- unlikely, okay?"
I looked amongst the crowd to see nervous faces at the mentioning of souls and pain, but Charmed continued her speech without pause.
"... make sure that nobatty here is plotting against the Princesses and Equestria, and to make sure that you can successfully return to duty and your lives that you'll have to get back together after being gone so long! Not to mention that you could meet your super distant relatives that might've carried down in your absence!"
I saw a few ponies break out into tears at that, and they were quickly consoled by friends and lovers soon after as the gravity of what   
was said in far too cheery of a manner finally stuck.
"... all get ready to head out to the University, so we can get this scanning underway. Everybatty ready?" she called, her horn erupting in a heavy golden glow and blinded those closest to her display.
"Everybatty get close to me, so we can do this in one shot!" she called out, her horn glowing another level of intensity brighter than before.
The Night Guards quickly flew onto the large platform, and squeezed together as much as possible.
"Here we goooo!!" She yelled in pain, her horn erupting into a volcano of golden light as I felt my body compress and get squeezed through a hole shaped outline of myself, towards a building off in the distance.
ZA-POOF
"AAAaaaaauuuughhh YEAH." Cried Charmed, her horn a smoldering wreck as she collapsed on the floor. She was over exerted, and the effort of teleporting over a hundred ponies a few kilotrots to their destination all at once had made her horn burn out. How she even managed the spell or the fact that she was able to not die from the sheer energy required for such a feat remained a mystery to me, but I attributed it to her position as a University teacher in a school for gifted unicorns.
At least, that's what the banner said.
"Aaaaah! Monsters!" I heard a foal cry, as myself and a few other Night Guard turned around to see a classroom of foals looking terrified at the silver and midnight blue armored ponies with bat wings, fangs and slit pupils stared at them in surprise.
"You won't get my class! Not a single one of them, you hear?!" A mare yelled at us, causing Lantern Light, Night Breeze, Moon Sight and myself to turn towards the angry school teacher unicorn and receive a heavy blast of telekinetic energy to the chest, sending us across the room and embedding our armored bodies into the dry-wall.
Charmed was passed out on the floor, and we heard banging on the school door from the outside. I was just picking myself off of the floor before I was struck across the face by a very hard hitting hoof, sending me sprawling sideways and planting my head inside of a Cubby hole.
"Get back, monsters!" She cried, blasting what sounded like Moon Sight into a locker.
"Ma'am, Open the door!" I heard a gruff voice call from behind the door.
"They're mine!" another blast of energy and something collided with my flank. I tried to pull my head free of the cubby hole, but my helmet had rendered me helpless as it was wedged inside.
"Ma'am, please!" The voice called out.
I heard the tinkling of keys, and the door swung open with a bang as Royal Guards flooded the room.
"Oh, thank Celestia its just the Night Guards." I heard a younger voice state, before somepony grabbed my flank and pulled hard.
"Aaaaaooooww!" I screeched, in pain from the helmet clamping down on my head.
"What are these ponies?" The teacher asked in an exhausted voice, spent from 'defending' her school foals.
"They are the Night Guard, from the Nightmare Moon days. Ah! Don't worry, they're fine, just like Princess Luna is." The younger voice tried to reassure the teacher.
"Um... Mister? I can help you if you want." The voice of a filly said, with the guard still trying to rip my head out of the cubby hole.
"Sure, I'd appreciate the help." The guard released his grip of my flank, as I fell on my face from the cubby assembly turning ethereal entirely. I scrambled away from the wooden death trap as it came back into being, and the filly sat down on her haunches.
"I did it!" exclaimed the filly, who quickly inspected her flank to see if a cutie mark had appeared. Sadly, none did, and she quietly walked back to her seat with a pout.
"Hey, your face is weird. Your eyes are weird too. Your teeth are weird too!" A buck was saying, making me annoyed and I growled at him in an effort to make him go away, but it came out as a squeaky rumbling.
"Ha-ha. Your voice is funny!" he mocked, scampering off to his teacher. Realizing that I was getting angry with a Foal for being a Foal, I picked myself up and talked with the Royal Guards about Charmed.
"Yeah, well she tried to teleport all of you, but apparently only got about ten total. We've been looking around for you, and you're the last group that completed the teleport. The rest of 'em never left the platform. Yeah, they're all safe 'n sound, but we figured we'd just send you over to the University on Thursday, after the announcement speech on Wednesday.
"You mean, this isn't the university?" I asked.
"Nope, You're in Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns." He looked around a bit, before continuing. "You landed in Magic Kindergarden."

//-------------------------------------------------------//
                 Chapter 4: Yawning Again                  
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 4: Yawning Again
"This is a fairly standard reaction to the Night Guard popping in out of nowhere, as far as we've been informed. The other Guard were teleported into random districts in Canterlot. Two ended up in a park, and another three showed up in the middle of a merchant’s guild meeting. We don't have any pony trained in group teleportation, so we're going to sneak you out of here during the night. We'll be able to make a public announcement tomorrow, to ensure the populace doesn't panic when rumors start spreading about today." The Royal Guard explained.
"So, we're to sit here with a classroom of Foals and an exhausted school teacher for most of the day?" I asked.
"It's not so bad, as far as assignments go. We could have a talk with the teacher and turn this into a surprise lesson for the Foals, if you don't mind, that is."
"I'll have a talk with the others, but first, would you share your name?"
"I am Guard Swift Action." He responded with a proud smile.
"That is... surprisingly accurate of your parents to have named you."
"I get that a lot." He gave a salute, and walked over to the teacher to check on her.
Alright. Now I just have to convince every...batty... to talk with foals all day.
"Well, would you all like to--"
"Yeah!"
"Sure, why not."
"Foals are soooo cute!" Night Breeze finished, making silly noises at one of the fillies in their desk nearby, who giggled in delight.
That was easier than I'd expected.
After some persuading of the teacher, and reassurances that we didn't eat foals, Swift Action led a class that he called "Intro to Bat ponies 101".
"Alright class, what can you tell me about these bat ponies that is different from... other ponies?" he salvaged his question from appearing racist, by calling Earth, Unicorn and Pegasus ponies 'normal'.
"They look funny!" A buck yelled, earning some laughs along with a scornful look from their teacher.
"Maybe, but what specifically about them is different?" Swift continued.
"They have pointy teeth!"
"And they have really fuzzy coats and ears!"
"They have pointy eyes!"
"Fangs!"
"Bat wings!"
"They all look the same, except for that one with purple eyes!" A filly pointed directly at me, and the entire class suddenly took notice of that fact. I felt the eyes of around thirty foals, my fellow Night Guards and the Royals all staring at me at once. I slowly tried to move behind Moon Sight to get them to stop looking at me, but she shoved me forward into the spotlight.
"Eep!" I squeaked in surprise at the shove, causing the everypony to laugh at my startled noise.
"That one squeaks!"
"I think he's shy!"
"Bat ponies are shy~!" One taunted in a sing song voice.
"I'm definitely not shy!" Night Breeze declared, holding a hoof to her chest like a poster soldier while looking proud.
"That one isn't as squeaky as the stallion!"
Ouch, my stallion-inity.
"Now, now, class. Let’s not get carried away." Swift called while raising a hoof to grab the attention of the foals. "We've noticed that bat ponies have fangs, bat wings, slit pupils (Not pointy eyes), fuzzy coats and ears, and what else?" he asked.
"Um... really squeaky voices!"
"Shy stallions!"
"Cutie marks?"
"Yes! Cutie marks, as well as the other things you've mentioned class. Night Guards, would you care to show the class your Cutie Marks?"
We shared a look between us, and began taking off our Midnight purple and silver armor to set it behind us on the floor.
"Now, which one do you want to hear the cutie mark story of first, class?"
"Cool pony!" Some shouted.
"Quiet pony!" More shouted.
"Squeaky pony!" One foal shouted, to be joined by the rest of the class in a deafening repeat of "Squeaky pony!!"
Recovering from the deafening blast of audio, amidst squeaks of pain from our sensitive ears getting overloaded, I looked to Swift to confirm that I would be going first.
"Whenever you're ready, Night Guard." he said, moving aside to give me the room.
Oh great, Public speaking. A whole classroom of foals and guards, and a teacher...
"Can bat ponies talk?" An impatient foal asked.
"Yes, I can talk. I just don't like crowds a whole lot." I responded.
"Ha-ha! Shy pony is shy!" the foal yelled, before the teacher walked over and whispered something to him, causing him to look shamed.
"Alright... Well, as you can see, my cutie mark is a brown book. I know you're probably thinking 'Why would a Night Guard have a book for a cutie mark? Shouldn't he have something cool, like a sword or a crossbow, or maybe even a crossbow that shoots swords!'"
That earned a few laughs from the foals that knew anything about weaponry, as well as some of the guards thankfully.
"But the truth is, I never really thought I was going to be a guard in the first place. From about your ages, I was in love with books. From reading the unique stories that they held, to finding out knowledge about old cultures and fiction thought up by anypony who could put a few decent words together. I didn’t actually realize that my special talent would be related to books until... Actually this is really embarrassing..." I trailed off, not really wanting to continue my cutie mark story in front of so many.
"Wait, what's your name, Mister?" the filly that freed my head from the cubby had asked with a raised hoof.
"I am Novel Thought, Miss...?"
"Everypony calls me Ghost Trapper!" She enthusiastically shouted.
"That’s... Well that’s a very different name than what I've heard before."
"Why don't you want to continue your cutie mark story, Mister Novel?" she asked.
I sighed heavily before explaining, "Well, I didn't actually -get- my cutie mark for a very long time. I was doing work for my family for so long, doing things I hated just so we could get by day to day, that I never got the chance to do any sort of self-discovery until I was twenty one. Which technically I still am, if you discount the thousand years I’ve been frozen in stone."
"You were in stone for a thousand years?!" some of the class shouted at once, then giggling in surprise that they thought alike before turning to me.
"Yes, I was a statue in the Pony Cotta Army until a few days ago." I looked toward the teacher, "Have you talked about the Pony Cotta Army, or is it not in the history books?"
"I think that is taught in the advanced history class, but it's an elective course." she said, as I noticed she was interested in my story as well.
"Did it hurt to be a statue for so long?" One of the class asked.
"Could you move?"
"Were you awake the whole time?
"Did you get hungry?"
I explained that I was sleeping the whole time, and wasn't aware of anything that was going on for a thousand years. My fellow Night Guards confirmed that they had a similar experience.
"How'd you get your cutie mark?" Ghost Trapper asked.
"Well, it was during a course for the Night Guard Officer Corps some thousand years ago. We were supposed to be going over some training reports to get us ready for when we were on duty. I got really bored of the work, because I had completed it in a few minutes while others were still working on the first page. I decided to flip one of the pages over and start writing whatever came to mind so I could distract myself. Before I knew it, I had used the backs of every one of the reports and found the instructor looking over my shoulder at what I was doing. He had apparently shouted a few times to get my attention, but decided to see what was making me so entranced. When I came out of my little writing world, he took the pages and told me to watch my rear. Then I saw that my cutie mark had appeared. I also found out that he used my story as an example report for later recruits to go over."
"That’s pretty lame for a guard." the impatient foal from before taunted, before a filly smacked him and they both got scolded by the teacher.
"What's your story, Miss Cool Pony?" a filly asked, pointing to Night Breeze.
"Well my name is Night Breeze, and I got my cutie mark for sneaking up on a Cockatrice in the night and clobbering him with a big stick!" she declared, looking proud of herself.
"Coooool!" Some ponies ooo'd and aah'd as well.
That just made me feel all kinds of warm and fuzzy. Except not. Oh well, they're foals and fillies. Children will be children.
"What about you?" One pointed at Lantern Light.
"Was riding on top of a carriage, and spotted a hurt Diamond Dog in the road. Called out for the carriage to stop, we put him in the wagon and drove him to a hospital. Now I got a Lantern on my flank." he put succinctly.
"What’s your name?"
"Lantern Light."
"Coooool." The ponies said again.
Bucking school foals.
"What about the quiet pony?" one said, pointing at Moon Sight.
"Moon was pretty. I liked it. Got a fancy telescope. Saw a bunch more of the moon. Got my cutie mark." she deadpanned, apparently bored.
"Cool?" A few of them said, sort of deflated from their expectations not being met.
Hah, take that!
***
One of the Royals looked at their watch (I learned that -that- was the metal ring around their hooves after an awkward conversation at lunch with a Royal Guard) and stated that it was time for us to move out.
We put our armor back on, as the Royal Guards tried to wake Charmed from her magically induced coma to no success. It was decided that she would be carried on the back of a Royal, due to the reaction of us being spotted, let alone with an unconscious and wounded mare with us.
"Alright, here’s the plan. Bat ponies stay on the rooftops, moving from building to building while you stay out of sight of the Earth and Unicorn ponies. We will make a big show of getting Charmed to the Royal Infirmary. That should attract most of the attention onto us, so long as you four stay out of sight and close to the buildings. We don’t want anypony spotting you if we can help it, or we'll have a whole other problem on our hands. You're supposed to be revealed to the population tomorrow in a controlled setting so nothing gets out of hoof." Swift Action briefed.
"If we see anypony in trouble, can we help out?" Lantern Light asked.
"The main goal is getting you four back to the Palace, but we -are- all still guards. If you can help somepony in need, go for it. Give you folks a little better PR."
"Pee Are?" I asked.
He gave me a look like I was an idiot before saying, "Public Relations."
"Oh, back in my day we just lopped off the heads of anypony that we didn't like." I responded, to see several mouths agape.
"What?" I asked, faking innocence. "They got better!"
"You chopped off heads!" A royal shouted.
"Of course not! I know what Public Relations is, I was joking!" I exclaimed.
Several faces became covered in hooves, and my helmet was slapped off of my head.
"Not funny, Novel."
***
We were getting close to the Palace, about three blocks away. We had stopped to try and help an old granny with her groceries, but had to retreat after she used her bags filled with apples like a large mace to ward off 'the con'sarned Changelings again.'
I don't know what a Changeling is, but they're apparently either bad news, or the equivalent of the lizard people that live in the sewers that everypony is convinced that runs all of Equestria and has secret dealings with Celestia, that are also related to Space aliens that are defeated by tin foil hats.
I’m not sure that anything seriously threatening would be defeated by headwear made of tin, but I’ve been gone for a thousand years. I suppose anything is possible this day and age, so I decided that I would buy my own hat of tin at some point in the future.
"Do you think tomorrow is gonna go any better than today, reactions wise?" Night Breeze asked as we hopped to the next building to keep pace with the very loud Royal Guards below. At this point they were starting to wake ponies up, but I thought it would be better if we just let them be instead of swooping down to inform them that the plan could be discarded. That might draw attention to ourselves before tomorrow, and it was sort of funny watching the theatrics.
"Well, if the Princesses are by our side and explain everything, I'm sure it will be fine." I responded.
"Where do you think they'll have us live? I don't want a repeat of when we had to move in to random ponies' homes and take up space. I mean, sure we paid for everything but it’s still really stressful to the families if they have a stranger in armor with weapons in their home." She continued.
"I’m not sure if they even -have- weapons anymore. Have you seen any of the Royals with swords or crossbows?"
"Now that I think about it, I haven't. Maybe they don’t get attacked a whole lot?" she offered.
"Well, if that were true, they wouldn't be needing to bring us out of our stone hibernation." I hopped over to the next building, a block away from the Palace gates.
"Then why don't they arm themselves with weapons? It only makes sense that you would need to defend yourself against whatever beasties or invaders there might be."
"Maybe they haven't needed weapons in a while? We've been gone a thousand years, so I expect a lot has changed. I just never thought that a lack of weaponry would be on the list."
We finished our row of buildings, waiting for the Royals to give us the all clear signal to swoop down and join them at the palace Gate.
Swift Action came cantering up to the posted guards with Charmed on his back. He was soon joined by his fellow Royals, as he waved a hoof above his head somewhere in our vague direction. We took that as the signal, and descended on the guards.
Apparently they were startled as we arrived, because a few of them almost leapt out of their armor when we came into the lantern light.
"Sweet Luna! You all scared me half to death, coming out of nowhere like that!" Swift Action said, recovering from a filly-ish scream.
"All I saw was your eyes coming down on us when you got near the lantern!" A gate guard declared.
The Night Guards and I shared looks, before devilishly smiling and taking flight again, leaving the Royals wondering where we had gone to.
"Boo!" I barked from a pillar holding up the gate, startling the guard below. I kept my mouth open to reveal my fangs just to add to the spook factor.
"Stop that! You're givin' me the heebie-jeebies!" the guard complained. "I swear, as soon as you lot are able to take up the night shift, I'm going on a vacation. First the Changelings, now you Night Guards creepin around and spookin' ponies."
I gave a squeaky laugh, before flittering down to Swift Action, making him scream a bit again at my sudden appearance. We were finally let through the palace gates, and led to our shared guest bedroom.
***
Upon seeing the wonderful and magnificent bed, we gave a collective yawn and i tossed my helmet to the side. It landed on the thick carpet with a soft metallic 'tink' as it rolled to a halt.
"Whelp. That was an interesting day. Anypony else going to take off their armor, or are we all just gonna buck it and sleep on the bed as we are?" I drowsily commented.
"I'm takin' my armor off, this stuff is exhausting." Night Breeze said, quickly undoing straps and wiggling out of the pieces she didn't want to bother with directly.
Moon Sight had already been taking off her armor as well, the second she closed the door behind us. I had gone to help Lantern Light with his armor, be he declined the help.
That made me sad, but I took it as a hint that he wasn't interested in anything but sleep. That, and catching his looks, I’m certain he was more interested in mares anyway.
Moon Sight and Night Breeze, however, took no pause to consider the implications of cuddling with another under the sheets of the bed.
"You two cozy?" I asked from the side of the bed.
"Yep! Moonie here has a really soft coat." She nuzzled into Moon Sight, who seemed relaxed and returned the favor.
"Great, we got two cuddling mares, a Colt-Cuddler Lieutenant, and a Stallion who at the moment, is very disappointed." Lantern Light pouted.
"Hey, we could still cuddle if you-" I tried, before being interrupted.
"Nope, I'm just fine, Lieu. Thanks, but no thanks."
My ears drooped as my fantasies went up in smoke, as I grabbed a pillow from the bed and decided to sleep above the sheets at the hoof of the bed.
"Oh come on, Lieu. Don't be like that. It gets cold at night and nopony wants to see a mopey and sad C.O." Night Breeze offered, lifting her section of the sheets.
"You sure? I don't want to interfere with your cuddling. Also, are you two going to call me Lieu as well now?" I was still upset, and a bit touchy.
"Well, if you want us to call you something else, just let us know. Now get over here before you freeze!" She beckoned with a hoof, while Moon wiggled to the side to give room.
"Just call me Novel, I like that a lot more than 'Lieu' or 'Any-kind-of-rank, Thought'." I said, holding my pillow in my mouth as I hopped onto the bed and took my spot between the mares.
"Oh, just my luck. Colt-Cuddler takes a spot between two nice, warm Filly fooling mares." Lantern Light grumbled, shifting his back to us and pulling his sheet over his head.
I frowned for a moment, before I was given a hug by Moon and Breeze.
"Hey, don't worry about it Novvie. I'm sure you'll find somepony someday soon!" She poked my muzzle with her hoof, before snuggling close to me.
Yeah. I probably would. But there was still tomorrow to get through, as well as everything else that could go wrong when it comes to introducing a new species of Bat ponies to a large crowd. Especially when the announcement isn't described beforehand, and kept as a surprise. Celestia must still love messing with her subjects.
Oh well, all that can be dealt with tomorrow. For now, I’m going to get some sleep and not worry about it.

//-------------------------------------------------------//
                   Chapter 5: Out of Bed                   
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 5: Out of Bed
I awoke to my muzzle being pet by what felt like somepony's hoof, and opened my eye to see Night Breeze lazily batting at my face. Her eyes were shut, so I assumed she was still asleep. Once again I was the first to awaken, so I tried to slip out of bed without disturbing anypony else, only to find that Moon Sight was wrapped around my body.
I couldn't move without disturbing her, and now Night Breeze was pulling herself close to me. I was trapped between two sleepy mares underneath the bed covers, when the door flung open suddenly to Tower Shield and Halberd entering the room.
"Night Guards, yo-- Wha... Oh... Oh ho ho!" Halberd began, before chuckling at the scene of my eyes poking over the lip of the sheets to look at them, my ears trying to hide behind my head. I must've been blushing as well, because my face was getting hot.
"Hey, if that's how you did things back in your day, we should be more traditionalist! What do ya say, Tower?" Halberd jabbed Tower's side with a hoof, as the two laughed.
"Huh... Wha?" I heard Night Breeze murmur before opening her eyes and quickly unhoofing me. "OH! Oh no! Um, It's not what it looks like!" she tried to hurriedly explain, making the Royals laugh harder.
"What’s all that racket?" I heard Moon Sight complain, squeezing me tight enough to make my pleas of help to come out in a rasp.
"Moon. Please...stop. You're...crushing me!" I wheezed, as Lantern Light came through the door in his armor to the scene.
"Now -that- is wonderful." he groaned, before swiftly turning around on the spot and trotting out.
"Night... help!" I begged, still being crushed by the strength of Moon Sight.
"Moooonie~!" she called, lightly rocking Moon. "Come on Mooonie, it’s time to get up!"
"I don't want to. Five more minutes. This pillow is really fuzzy and warm..." She mumbled, wrapping all of her hooves around my body and leaving me helpless in her grasp.
The Royals decided to leave me to my fate, and shut the door while still laughing. I imagined this would be the new rumor amongst the guard that 'Novel is really good in bed with the Bat pony mares' or something along those lines.
"Keep Moonie warm for me, okay Novvie?" Night taunted, moving to get her armor on for the day as I lay there helplessly.
It wasn't -so- bad, I was just concerned about my ribs remaining intact if she squeezed any harder. Im sure that for Lantern Light, this would've been a dream come true, but it was just making me uncomfortable to be this close to a mare. I counted my graces that she was hugging my backside, as that would've just sent all the wrong signals to my body if she was... yeah.
I may be into stallions, but it's not like my body gets picky over what is making it excited. It just makes it that much more awkward having to explain all of that to a mare that wants a good time.
"Wait a minute, you're not a pillow..." I heard Moon grumble, before lazily shoving me away, which caused me to shoot across the bed and off the other side onto the floor. I really don't want to see her get angry at anypony, because her lazy shove was the equivalent of me trying my hardest to move somepony.
I looked up to see Night Breeze standing over me, her uniformed head upside down from where I lay on the carpet.
"Was it good for you, too?" She taunted, poking my nose with a hoof again before helping me off of the floor.
"Oh yeah." I softly responded in the fake voice that was becoming part of Guard Culture.
"Pfft, good one." Moon giggled from her spot on the bed, before rolling over and taking the sheets with her off the bed.
We quickly donned our armor, making sure everything was in order before we headed out to the dining hall. We got a few snickers from passing royals about the news that had already spread, and we entered the dining hall to the sound of the head chef Ram Sea yelling at some poor cook of his staff.
"I tol' ye 'ets the same thin' as the lass food we made! 'Ets not hard!" He shouted, as the cook made a hasty retreat to the larder.
"Oh, 'ets you lot again! We got tha' same food as before, an' some new stuff that the ditsy unicorn 'Charmed' thought up. Try both if ye' want, ye' won't hurt my feelin's none." He then waved a hoof dismissively at us, and went after the cook that had retreated.
"Well, at least he's nice about our food. I just wouldn't want to work for the guy." Moon said, her usually stoic and reserved demeanor more relaxed around me, now that i had survived a night of her cuddle strength.
"You're a lot more chipper than you usually are, Moon Sight." I noted.
"You're not as bad as I thought you'd be, being an officer and all. Not too many officers would admit to being a Colt-Cuddler, let alone be alright with cuddling with two mares on top of that."
"Um... thanks?" I wasn't sure how to respond to that, but she gave me a pat on the back and we sat down with our food.
I had a bowl of the rainbow apple stuff from yesterday, along with some new kind of vegetable stew. I looked around at the other bat ponies gathered, and it seemed like they were enjoying both dishes. I decided 'the hay with it' and ate the vegetable soup first. It was wonderfully seasoned and had a lot more flavor than I would've expected, and the rainbow stuff was just as good as it was yesterday.
***
We gathered as a group for another briefing, and lightly talked amongst ourselves before Captain Armor came through the double wooden doors.
"All rise, for Princesses Luna and Celestia!" he announced, and everypony shot to their hooves in salute as the goddesses of the Sun and Moon entered the assembly.
"Please, none of that for now." Princess Celestia said, waving a hoof for us to return as we were. "My Sister and I wanted to reassure you personally that we deeply appreciate all that you have done for us. I fully expected you to all to leave the Night Guard and restart your lives as soon as you were able, but my sister Luna spoke highly of your collective loyalty and sense of duty." She spoke with a motherly tone, reassuring and calming while also determined and firm.
"We could not stand idly by, while you continued to be imprisoned in stone for crimes you did not commit willingly." Luna continued, "Today is to be the great declaration of the return of my Night Guard. I am most grateful that all of you have chosen to remain in my service, but I would ask why you have chosen so." She asked.
There was some murmuring between the Night Guard, all apparently saying different reasons. I decided to speak up.
"The Oath!" I shouted, and looking around I saw some eyes light up in remembrance. Soon, the entire room stood at attention and recited the Oath as one.
"Princess Luna, We swear loyalty to you, and only you. We will serve forever in your name until you release us, or death take us. We will cast aside self-serving interests and will complete our duties without sabotage or deceit. On our lives we swear this. Praise Luna!" We finished with a shout that shoot the ornate windows, as our voices sounded loud enough to cause some Royals to hold their ears in pain.
Princess Luna seemed taken aback, and slightly embarrassed as her sister Celestia gave her a curious look with a raised eyebrow.
"We, may have gotten carried away when we made the Night Guard, dear sister. It was over a thousand years ago and-" she was cut off by Celestia draping a wing over her sister in a hug.
"Don't worry, Luna. I’m not angry with you or disappointed. I just find it amusing that the oaths these ponies swore so long ago are still being held true after all this time. I have no doubt in your judge of character for choosing these ponies to serve you." Her voice remained soothing and calm throughout, reassuring the Princess of the Night that all was well.
After a moment's pause, Celestia continued to address us.
"Now, we are going to be in front of the majority of Canterlot's populace. We will make the announcement of your return, and you will march as a unit into the city square in the middle of all of my little ponies." She finished with an affectionate tone that spoke of motherly love, rather than a condescending one.
"It will be crucial that everything goes to plan, and of course with any plan, it won't." she finished with a smirk and wink, before returning control of the meeting to Shining Armor.
"Alright, make sure you're all geared up in your armor and looking presentable. Though with how you look now, that won't be an issue. The highest concern is that the population is still on edge after the Changeling attack, so we're going to have Royal Guard stationed along the pathway on crowd control duty. If things really start getting out of hand, I want you all to fly back to the Palace. Understood?" His eyes sweeping over the Night Guard, and we returned his gaze with our salute.
"Hmm, still haven't gotten the 'new' salute down to memory. Oh well, It will probably distinguish you from the Royal Guard, if the bat pony features didn't." He finished with a smile.
***
The ceremony was going on very well, until the citizens of Canterlot heard the uniform marching of a hundred ponies coming around the corner. With our heavy armor of the Night Guard, the sound was deafening as we marched. Ponies that had missed the ceremony hid in their shops or anywhere they could, really. I few unicorns had taken to lifting up objects to throw at us, before a stern look from a Royal Guard made them rethink their actions.
We came to a stop in the center of the square, to dead silence. Only the sound of breathing and a few newborns crying were heard as we stood in formation facing the Princesses. Several moments passed, and it felt like eternity as I saw ponies looking at us nervously.
Suddenly, I saw a filly running through the crowd. She burst through the line of Royal Guard that was keeping the crowd back, and she trotted down the lines, searching for somepony. Then I realized that it was Ghost Trapper!
We locked eyes, and she ran over to me. I stepped backwards and left formation to a few grumbles and hisses of 'what are you doing?!' as the filly jumped into my hooves.
"Hi Novel! I missed you!" She practically yelled in excitement and hugged me as I leaned over to return the hug with one of my armored hooves.
A few ponies that were on edge and extremely concerned immediately let out a collective "D’aaawww..." and the tension in the crowd deflated as the news traveled through the ranks of the gathered population. Moments later, a pony cheered and started a chant amongst the crowd.
"Long Live Luna! Long Live Luna! Long Live Luna!" They shouted, stomping their hooves in applause. This went on for a short while, before Celestia and Luna called for the crowd to simmer down, as they continued the ceremony.
"My little ponies, it has come to my attention that the Night Guard of a Millennia ago still wish to serve the ponies of Equestria. They have given many times their lives in service to both my Sister Luna, and to you as well. When they were released from their imprisonment by the Elements of Harmony, I gave them the option to return to a normal life where they wouldn't have to serve. They could've chosen to live happily and freely like they never would've been able to a thousand years ago." She paused for effect, to let the words sink in before continuing.
"Not a single one of them took up that offer, and instead chose to -continue- serving the people of Equestria in our time of need. I ask that you get to know the ponies of the Night Guard, as they are determined to make your lives safer than they ever have been before. With the recent Changeling attack, they will bolster our forces and allow for greater protection against enemies both seen and unseen. Don't let their appearance deter you from making friends, as I'm sure they won't be shy about wanting to be friends with you."
"Over the next several months, we will be reviving the remaining ponies of the Pony Cotta Army, and give them the opportunity for a free life, or to continue in service. Whatever they may choose, I request that you treat them with the same respect as you would with anypony else. I know they will do the same for you." She finished with a reassuring smile, as the crowd cheered her words and the end of the Ceremony.
I looked back to Ghost Trapper, who was standing on my back and asked, "How did you know it was me? Don't we all look the same?"
"Well, you're the only pony with Purple eyes! It's not -that- hard to find you, ya know." she cheerfully pointed out, trying to noogie my mane through the helmet on my head.
"I'm glad you showed up when you did. It looked like things were about to get pretty ugly there for a moment." I heard Moon Sight say, joined with Night Breeze and Lantern Light.
"I thought we'd have to fly out of here, with the stares I was getting. You'd think we were the ones that attacked Canterlot!" Lantern added.
"Well, I guess the filly is as good a judge of character as any. I’m just wondering about your eyes, Novvie." Night Breeze said while nudging my helmet with a hoof.
"Hey, I don't know why my eyes didn't change like the everypony else's. I just consider it a perk." I defensively replied.
"Don't get all upset about it, I just want to know how it happened is all." Breeze replied, a hoof raised in mock surrender.
We stuck around for a few hours, mingling with the city-folk and doing our best to educate and clarify things about Bat Ponies. One pony even asked if we ate bugs, to which we collectively gagged at the thought. A few more curious characters talked with us, asking questions about guard life and what it’s like inside of the Palace, but they were met with blunt answers that were vague enough to not reveal any information. We may have been gone a thousand years, but we knew when to keep our mouth shut. Especially when it came to the security of the Palace and the Princesses. The ponies left in good humors, but I could swear that it vanished as soon as they got out of earshot of a normal pony.
"Let's go back to the castle. It's getting dark out and we've been talking and playing politician all day." Moon complained, and we all agreed that it was time to return to the castle.
***
We greeted Tower Shield and Halberd at our door, amongst other guards who would taunt me with calls of 'Oh yeah!' when they spotted me. It was nice that I had started a fad, but it was also getting slightly annoying that it was replacing 'Hello' or any other greeting amongst the guard.
"So, everypony want to cuddle together, or are you gonna get all upset again?" Night Breeze taunted Lantern Light with a prodding hoof, as we all took off our armor.
"Ya know, I had expected that we'd all have our own places to live by now. I don't know how long it’s gonna take for them to get that arranged, but I don't think it can come soon enough." he lamented.
"Yep, gonna keep being a party pooper. Come on, Novvie. Let’s go cuddle!" Night called out, landing on the bed and springing up a bit, before coming to a standstill.
I had finished taking off the last of my armor, before asking, "Are you sure? Don't you remember the drama that happened this morning because we did that?"
"Yeah, but everypony can go suck hayseed for all I care. You're ridiculously fluffy, Novvie. You make the best pillow." She was blushing, and that was making me nervous.
"Um... you know I’m into Stallions, right? Cause you're blushing and I'm getting worried that you're having...ideas..." I meekly replied, slowly walking toward the bed and looking anywhere but her eyes.
"Oh for the love of CELESTIA!" Lantern Light cried out. "Fine! I'll cuddle with Novel and you two!"  
"Yaaaay!" Moon Sight and Night Breeze cheered in unison, their apparent plan to tease Lantern into submission working perfectly.
"U-uh... are you su-" I stammered before being yanked onto the bed with covers being thrown on me.
"Yep! Get on in here, Lantern! Don't be afraid of your C.O., He won't bite!" Moon beckoned him with a hoof.
"And besides, if he does bite, you can bite back! Everypony here has fangs!" Night joined.
"Sexy, pointy fangs!" Moon returned.
"Alright, Alright, enough!" Lantern surrendered, pulling himself underneath the covers of the bed.
"Just... No funny business. Ya hear?" He said, looking right at me.
"W-what do you mean?" I replied.
"No gettin' aroused!" he almost shouted, making me recoil and hide under the covers.  
"Hey, no being Stallo-phobic to Novvie! It's not his fault that you're a Barn-case." Moon taunted with a tongue sticking out at Lantern.
"I am -not- a barn-case!" he defensively protested.
"Are too!" Night and Moon countered.
"Am not!" he shrieked.
"Jeeze, you're defensive enough to be one." Night said, blowing a raspberry at him.
"Can we just sleep now?" I whispered, covering my ears from the shouting.
"Come here, squeamish!" Moon cheered, grabbing me from behind and squeezing me tightly like a plushy toy.
Night Breeze then shifted around, and pushed Lantern Light into me, belly first. I looked at his face and blushed deeply.
"Not. One. Word." He warned, giving me a hard stare as I tried to hide my eyes and just go to sleep, hoping nothing embarrassing would happen during the night.

//-------------------------------------------------------//
                   Chapter 6: Moving Out                   
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 6: Moving Out
Trying to sleep while having your crush pressed against you in an intimate way makes it really -really- hard to sleep.
Pun not intended...
Moon Sight was hugging me from behind, and Lantern Light was pressed against my belly, making it very hard to avoid rubbing our nethers together. I honestly tried my best to make sure it didn't happen, but soon after he fell asleep his body decided that it was time to do more than just cuddle.
Everypony knows that when you're sleeping, at least while comfortably naked and a stallion, your genitalia like to do exercises so they can be 'ready for the big day'. This meant that I was doing my best to avoid waking Lantern Light up as his... stallion... pressed into mine.
And he told -me- not to get aroused. The nerve.
I had tried to squirm out of the way, so things wouldn't be even worse for when he woke up, but any movement just made both of us harder. On top of that, Night Breeze was hugging Lantern from his rear and getting nocturnally frisky.
So, I was left to my fate of staying awake all night in the midst of ponies that haven't had any sort of release for about a thousand years, including myself. I did my best to not make things any more excited, but I can’t do a whole lot to help the situation when being sleepily grinded on by a mare, and stallion with a raging erection.
***
I wasn't able to sleep a minute for the entire night, just doing my best to stay calm and not wake anypony up by making things...sticky. You’d think that would be an easy task, since ponies are usually naked in the first place. Not as easy when you're being teased by sleeping ponies who don’t actually know they're doing so.
A loud knock at the door both made me jump, and wince as I realized that it would be the Royals coming through the door to wake us up for the day. When they came through that door I was certain they would make some kind of joke or--
It was Princess Luna.
"Night Guards, Your housing arrangements are... Oh. Oh my." She covered her face that was lit by a bright pink blush as she turned away from my helpless peeking behind the bedsheets.
"If you need privacy we would be more than willing to-" Luna whispered.
"Help me! Please!" I whisper shouted, interrupting her.
"What do you mean? Do not most ponies...do... this sort of thing?" she replied, still hiding her face.
"They're still sleeping and I'm trapped between them!" I replied, my ears folded back and face burning in embarrassment.
Her horn lit up, and wrapped me in a magic field. "Well, then let me help you." she stated, and I flailed my hooves to try and break her grasp but it was too late.
There I floated, flailing desperately, in front of the Goddess of the Night, Princess Luna, Co-Ruler of Equestria, with the largest throbbing erection in my life after an entire eight hours of grinding and teasing.
I wanted to die, but I could only settle for trying to hide my shame and my face with my hooves, as I curled into a distressed fuzzy batpony ball of hormones and sexual frustration in the air.
Thankfully, she had the grace to not drop me on the floor in shock, and gently placed me on the floor where I could will myself out of existence in peace to escape the flood of embarrassment.
"Novel Thought, was it?" She asked, and my face burned brighter than the sun that not only had she found me like this, but she -knew my name-.
"Y-y-yes." I squeaked, barely even audible to my own ears. I decided to just nod my head when she asked again.
"Do not worry, Novel Thought. I have lived long enough to know the... desires... of ponies very well. Do not be ashamed, as this was not your fault." She placed a hoof on my side to comfort me, but it made me feel even worse as I tried to squirm away, making my erection flop around and leading to me being even more embarrassed as I hid it with my hooves again.
After an awkward pause, and noticing that I was tearing up from my situation, the Princess spoke again.
"We will leave now, so that you may... Ah... relieve yourself... in peace. Come to the Dining hall when you are ready, and bring your companions with you." She stated, before making a hasty retreat from the room and closing the doors with a slam.
"Wha?!" I heard three voices shout from the bed, before a more startled voice yelped "What the hay?!"
"Ha-ha! Lantern Light is hard!" Night Breeze taunted.
I heard a moment of giggling at Lantern's expense, which was followed by silence.
"Where is Novvie?" I heard Moon Sight ask.
Please don't find me. Please don't find me.
"There he is! D'aaawww, and he's hard too!" Night Breeze cooed, looking over the side of the bed at my scrunched up form attempting to hide my throbbing hard-on.
"He better not've done any funny business while we were sleepin' !" Lantern cried, and got pat on the head by Night and Moon.
"I think he's not the one who's been doing any funny business, Barn-case." Moon teased, ripping the sheets off to reveal his indecent state, and covering me in the sheets as they fell to the floor over me.
"Darn it, Moon! I know both you mares are Filly-Foolers, but you don't gotta go making a spectacle of a stallion's... stallion!"
"Hey Novvie, I bet Lantern here can help you out with that large erection you've got going on down there!" Night Breeze called out, moving the sheets around in search of me.
"I ain't a barn-case!" Lantern yelped, trying to pull sheets over himself.
The sheets came off of me, and I bolted for the bathroom and desperately tried to lock the door, but I was too panicked to do it properly. The door swung open, and Moon Sight picked me up in her forehooves and flew back to the bed.
"C-can we -not- do this, please?" I begged, being dropped onto the mattress with a bounce before my head landed right next to Lantern's Stallion, barely an inch away.
"I actually agree with Novel on this one!" Lantern yelped again, frantically moving himself away from my face as I curled into a ball and tried to cover myself in pillows.
***
After a short eternity of teasing by Night Breeze and Moon Sight, they settled down and we all got ourselves ready for the day, albeit with a lot more teasing and attempts to get me hard again, which is surprisingly easy.
The four of us agreed to a truce to not continue our teasing outside of the bedroom, and we moved quickly past Tower Shield and Halberd to escape their uproar of laughter at having heard us through the door the entire time. We were the only group of bat ponies in the dining hall, and the food was left out and getting cold.
"Wow. Guess we were fooling around a lot longer than we thought." Night said, and we moved over to serve ourselves breakfast.
"Rainbow apple-stuff!" I cheered, previous embarrassment forgotten as I filled two bowls and excitedly trotted off to eat at a nearby table. I heard some whispering and giggles from the three behind me, but i was too busy enjoying the apple goodness to really care.
***
We wandered around the Palace for a bit in search of Princess Luna, before running into Captain Shining Armor and his entourage of a few Royal Guards.
"Oh, there you are! We've been looking for you. All of your housing arrangements have finally gone through, so you'll be able to move into your own homes now. You can always move into the same home, as that would give us more to work with when the other Night Guard come through. Would any of you be wanting to share a house?" The Captain asked.
"Moonie and I would love a house together!" Night Breeze cheered, wrapping Moon Sight in a hug while she blushed from being called 'Moonie' in front of the Captain.
"Splendid! What would you two be looking for?" He pointed to Lantern and I.
"Separate housing!" We both blurted out in unison, before looking at each other and then looking away awkwardly.
Shining Armor blinked a few times, before saying "Well alight then. Follow Gale Wind here, Night Breeze and Moon Sight. He will take you to your house. Lantern Light, follow Cross Wind to yours. Novel Thought, I'll take you to your home myself." He held a hoof to his breastplate, before waving a hoof to dismiss the others.
After they had departed, he started talking to me. "That was interesting back there. Care to explain what happened?"
"U-um... Misunderstanding. It's awkward and I don't want to talk about it." I quickly squeaked out, looking at the floor to avoid his expression.
"All right, I won't press." He raised a hoof in apology, before continuing. "Now, I've gotta be honest. Getting all this housing on such short notice has lead us to cutting a few corners. Those of you going into single housing will be getting the short end of the stick, as these houses were some of the ones that were damaged in the Changeling attack. There might be some squatters there, so that’s why I sent some Royals along with your friends."
My ears rose in interest. "You mean that there’s homeless here, after the attack? I would've thought that it would be a priority to find them housing before us. After all, we've been living in luxury while we waited." I pointed out.
"That's true, but you're also guests of the Princesses. You've also been unjustly punished and not given a trial beforehoof."
"If it's our homes, we can take in ponies in need, right?" I asked, still looking at the floor as we walked through the streets of Canterlot.
"Well of course, just don’t be surprised if somepony takes valuables of yours and leaves in the night." Shining warned.
I nodded, and he tried to strike up a few more conversations along the way but I wasn't feeling very talkative after learning of all those ponies without a home.
***
We came up to a gated house with a small vegetable garden in the front, with a cobblestone walkway leading from the gate to the door. It was tucked in between two other similar houses, excepting mine was painted purple with silver trim around the windows and door frame. The walls were wooden, with a tiled roof and a gutter leading over the wall to dump onto the street.
"Well, here you are. Home sweet Home. Here's the keys." He floated a keychain with two keys on it to me, and I clipped it onto my foreleg's armor.
"Do you need rent or anything for it? I don't have an--" I was saying, before he interrupted.
"Nope! Don't worry about all that. It's part of being a Night Guard. Your housing and groceries are free to help compensate for the thousand years of pay you would've gone without."
Holy Celestia, that guard was actually right! We're getting a thousand years of missed pay!
"Thank you!" I blurted, and caught myself before I wrapped Shining Armor in a hug. I settled for a pat on his shoulder and backed away sheepishly.
"Hey, don't worry about it. Feel free to enjoy your home and do what you want with it. I have to go settle the few remaining Night Guard that are still snoozing. Come back to duty in a week, we’re going to be reviving the next set of ponies after we do a performance review." He gave a salute, and I returned my own before he left.
I fumbled around with the keys to my new home, exhausted from not sleeping the entire night, before accidently dropping them on the welcome mat. I bumped my head on the door with my helmet as I leaned over to pick them up, and heard buzzing from behind the door.
Too tired to really care, I successfully opened the door with a turn of the key, and walked into my new living room. There was two couches facing a fireplace, deep crimson carpet that was joyfully fuzzy to trot on, and a desk with a lamp in the corner.
I heard buzzing again from deeper in the house, so i decided to investigate the noise. It was probably just a bug or something, since these houses had apparently been abandoned for a while and it would be up to me to repair and replace things.
I found a bathroom with a toilet, sink and shower tub, along with free hoofsoap. Not finding the buzzing, i continued my investigation of the house and found the dining room.
There was a simple wooden table with four chairs pulled into it, and a bowl of some kind of paste thing resting on top of the table. I didn't want to touch it, but it seemed cold. Must've been left during the attack. It was strange that it hadn't rotted or anything though.
I tried to move away from the table, only to find that my hooves had been stuck to the floor by the same paste that was in the bowl. This paste, however, was getting hard very quickly.
I wrenched my hooves out of the hard slime substance, making it chip and crack where it had hardened, to come face to face with some weird, bug pony thing!
Standing there in shock, it buzzed angrily at me and barred its teeth.
"Whoa! Whoa, hey. Easy!" I tried to reassure the thing, as it lifted itself into the air with four insect wings and moved toward me. It also had a horn with holes in it, and now that I notice, its body was chitinous like a beetle!
"Hey! I'm not gonna hurt you, just explain what the hay is going on!" I begged, my hooves getting stuck to the floor again as it spat some green mucus substance at me. My body was slowly becoming trapped in this slime stuff, and the Bug pony was hovering right up against my face.
I blinked a few times, before noticing something.
"You have really pretty eyes."
The bug pony stopped growling at me, and dropped to the floor as it stopped hovering.
"What did you just say?" It asked me, turning its head sideways as its wings twitched.
"Um... I like your eyes? They're really pretty." I said again, certain that I had said the wrong thing, but no going back now.
This seemed to have stumped the bug pony, as it did a double take between looking at my slime covered body and the situation we were both in, before looking at me again.
"You're trapped in resin, captured by a Changeling, and you tell me that -my eyes are pretty-?" It asked in disbelief.
"Well...um...yeah?" I finished lamely.
"You're not going to kill me?" it asked, still in disbelief.
"Why would I do that?"
"Because I’m a changeling." It stated flatly, as if it was obvious that -that- is the first thing I should do upon seeing a changeling.
"Well I'm a Bat pony, so I don't see the problem?" I offered, not really trying to break out of the resin anymore and just talking with the changeling.
The changeling stared at me for a long time, before letting out a frustrated shout and smacking my resin coated self with a holed hoof.
"The worst part about this, is that I would be able to tell if you're lying! I can feel your emotions, and you're just curious! No anger, no hatred, no deceit or anything!" It raved.
"What's even more confusing, is that you're genuinely attracted to my eyes!" It spat out, and I cringed. "How is that even possible?!"
"Um... Ponies?" I offered, before I was smacked again and the resin around my chest and left forehoof broke away.
"Do you know what I was going to do to you, pony?" I shook my head. "I was going to trap you in resin, and suck out every bit of love that you had in your body. I'm starving, I don't have the energy to shapeshift anymore, let alone defeat a Royal Guard! Then you go and say something completely off the wall and... I can't even deal with this! This situation was -not- in my training!"
I was busy freeing my other hooves from the resin while it ranted on, and finally wrested control of myself from the hardened substance.
"You're -still- not angry at me! You're just a big fuzzy ball of confusion, concern and curiosity! What is wrong with you?!" It shouted, and I wrapped it in a hug so that the changeling might calm down and get a grip. A moment after I hugged it, I felt something getting drained out of me and pulled back in shock.
"Ohhh that’s -much- better." It moaned, swaying a bit before righting itself.
"What did you just do?" I asked, worried and confused at his behavior after my hug.
"Well, I siphoned off your affection. You're reeling from the mood shift right now, but you just gave me enough to last the rest of the day if I don't exert myself too much."
We stared at each other for a moment, neither of us making a move as we stood there.
"So..." I trailed.
"So..." It mimicked my voice perfectly.
"Wait, You do voices too?!" I exclaimed, completely forgetting any kind of tension as I had a voice buddy now!
"What?" It asked, disarmed.
"Voices! Say stuff in my voice again, that was cool!" I cheered happily, moving a little too close to the Changeling's face for comfort.
"Would you get out of my face?" It said in my voice, to which I squeaked in delight and trotted in a circle happily before facing it again.
"What should I call you? My name is Novel Thought!" I exclaimed.
"I think you should be called Maniac. I've never seen a pony get such harsh whiplash from their emotions being drained..."
"Oh come on, it's not that bad! What's your name, buggy?" I stopped pacing around the room and stood next to the pile of shattered and goopy resin.
"Don't call me 'Buggy'." It warned.
"Well, then what's your name?" I asked again.
It paused for a while, but I couldn't tell what it was thinking because its eyes didn’t have pupils. They were more of that strange grid that flies have, except it was a turquoise color and shiny.
"I'm not telling you my name. I still don't trust you, and you could betray me at any moment."
I fell down on the ground, tears welling up in my eyes as I cried out "Why don't you like me, pretty bug pony?!"
Its ears folded back in shock at my display, before it looked concerned and walked towards me slowly.
"I just want to be friends and you don’t want to be friends because you don't l-like m-m-meee!" I sobbed, tears water-falling from my eyes.
"By the first chrysalis, this is bad." It mumbled, as I twitched on the ground while crying. A small puddle was forming underneath me.
I felt a hard hoof touch my shoulder, and I quickly looked up into its pretty blue eyes.
"I really think your eyes are pretty! Why won't you believe me?!" I cried, burying my head in my hooves as the changeling desperately tried to calm me down.
"Easy there, Novel. Easy. Everything will be alright." It said, rubbing my cheeks with its hooves.
I took my helmet off and scrambled up, knocking the changeling over with me on top of it. I wrapped my armored hooves around its torso and squeezed him in a hug that Moon would be proud of.
"I knew it! You're trying to kill me!" It cried out, making me recoil in shock as I blurted out an explanation.
"No-no-no-no! I was giving you a hug! You said everything would be fine! Please make it better again!" I shrieked, about to cry again.
"You... what?!" It shouted, as I flinched backwards.
It looked up at the ceiling and shouted in exasperation, "Queen, what have you done to me?!"
I swayed to the side a bit, knocking over a vase of flowers.
"Is it just me, or is the room spinney?" I slurred, before falling on my side and crushing the small table that had propped me up.
The changeling stood over me, looking equally confused and concerned.
"Hey, you're spinney too!" I mumbled, before blacking out.

//-------------------------------------------------------//
                    Chapter 7: Roommate                    
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 7: Roommate
It felt strange, waking up. I couldn't hear anything and there wasn't Moon Sight, Night Breeze or Lantern Light to hug or tease me. I still felt surrounded in something, but I could only swish around.
Wait a minute, swish?
I opened my eyes and found myself floating in something. Some kind of liquid. I panicked for a second, thinking I was going to drown, before realizing that I wasn't breathing at all.
Am I dead?
I willed my hooves to move around, and they responded sure enough.
Well, that leaves out being dead.
Looking around, I noticed I was completely submerged in light green liquid that felt like mucus. I took a deep breath, and felt whatever kind of fluid that I was floating in go through my lungs. I wasn't irritated by it, and it felt nice.
Okay, what the hay is going on. This is weird.
I saw that my armor had been removed, as I drifted around the strange pod and poked the sides with a hoof.
Maybe this is something the Changeling did? It doesn't seem harmful and it’s not unpleasant. It’s just strange.
Deciding to enjoy myself, I spun around inside of the changeling creation thing for a few moments before I felt something tap the side of whatever was holding me.
A muffled voice called out to me, "You're still alive?"
"Um... why would I not be alive?" I asked.
"Well you're in a changeling chrysalis. Typically it doesn't go down well with pony physiology."
"Why is that?" I called out to the voice.
"Because they drown!"
Oh. Well that’s unfortunate. Why haven't I drowned then?
"So what does that mean?" I asked.
"It means that I have a mystery on my hooves." It called back, before a bright flash of green fire blinded me.
I fell to the ground as a flood of the mucus-like fluid poured over my kitchen floor. I was soaked in whatever this was, and started coughing up the strange fluid.
"You really should be dead. I was going to use you for food, but you started sleeping instead of melting." The changeling said, standing next to me as I heaved.
The changeling hit me on the backside, causing more fluid to come out of my lungs and stomach. I lay there for a while, catching my breath as it continued.
"Honestly, I didn't expect anypony to come here, let alone have a Night Guard move in. Did they even warn you about changelings?" it asked.
"W-well... They said there was a-a-augh." I vomited more of the sludge out of my stomach onto the floor.
"Nice." The changeling mocked, as I got myself together again.
"They said there was a changeling invasion, so they wanted to take us out of stone to help defend Equestria." I managed, still trying to keep myself from getting sick again.
"Take you out of stone?"
"Yeah. Have you ever heard of the Pony Cotta Army?"
"Oh great, they're bringing -that- back?" it scoffed, leaving me to lay in a puddle of goop.
"Hey, you never told me your name!" I called out, trying to get to my hooves but slipping and falling down again.
"Still don't trust you!" It called back.
"Then I'm just gonna have to call you Bugsy!"
A moment of silence, as I got to my hooves and carefully walked around the corner.
"Fine. I'll tell you then. We aren't given names in the hive. There’s no need for one if you can just buzz someling's frequency."
"Wait, you don't have a name? That’s horrible!" I exclaimed, still getting my balance.
"Yes, yes. Truly awful, yadda yadda."
"Well, I'm going to name you!" I declared, as the changeling spun around to look at me.
"And what makes you think I would allow you to name me? I'm not your pet!" It challenged.
"Well, I'm not going to give you a -pet- name. I'm going to give you a proper pony name!"
"I'm not a pony, I'm a Changeling!" It stomped a hoof accompanied with an angry buzzing.
"Well, then I'll improvise!" The buzzing stopped, as it retracted its hoof.
"Now then, are you a mare or a stallion?" I asked.
"We're changelings. We don’t have a gender."
"Well, what would you want to be if you had one?"
"I've shapeshifted into both Mares and Stallions."
"Did you like one of them more?"
"Not particularly. They're both still ponies."
"I thought you need ponies?"
"For food, maybe. That would be like me asking you what blade of grass you like the most, or what kind of apple you'd prefer to be."
"Oh, I know this one! The Rainbow Apples are the best!"
The changeling looked at me, and facehoofed with an exasperated sigh.
"Come on, don't make me pick for you!" I taunted.
"Why, would that be bad?" It asked.
"Well, I have a thing for stallions, and I still think your eyes are pretty. Besides, you're kinda...cute." I looked down at the floor, rubbing my left foreleg with my right hoof while I blushed.
"You...you..." the changeling stammered.
"You are an impossible pony, Novel Thought." It stated with a defeated sigh. "You are the only pony I’ve seen that is actually -attracted- to changelings."
"Is that a bad thing?" I asked, looking up into its wonderful eyes.
"Look at you! You're a Guard of the Night Watch, and you're swooning for an enemy of your country because you think it has pretty eyes! I literally have to drain your emotions to survive, and you don't even care!"
"I'm actually a Lieutenant." I added, and the changeling threw its hooves in the air in disbelief.
"An OFFICER is hitting on me!" the changeling cried to the ceiling, holding its head in its hooves.
I walked up to the changeling that was laying on the floor, hiding its face behind its hooves as I tried to give it a back rub with a hoof. It doesn’t really work well to massage a carapace though.
"What... are you doing?" It growled.
"Trying to give you a back massage?" I replied meekly.
The changeling sighed again, and rolled over on its side.
"I don't even know why I bother with this. You are the most confusing pony." The changeling huffed.
"I was told that I was the Fuzziest pony, actually."
It stared blankly at me.
I stared back.
Then it started lightly buzzing as its body shook!
"Are you okay? You're shaking!" I squeaked, trying to hold him down to make the shaking stop.
It knocked my hooves aside and got up.
"I was laughing, Novel." It brushed itself off, and flittered its wings a bit.
"I haven't had a pony make me genuinely laugh... ever, now that I think about it. Usually that would only happen with my Hive mates if we... well, it doesn't matter. They're all gone now." it sighed.
"Hey, don’t worry about it. I’m sure you can make a bunch of friends here in Canterlot!" I offered, draping my hoof over the changeling and giving it a hug.
"Friends with a Changeling? You -do- realize what you've just said, right?"
"Well yeah. You're not a bad pony, you're just different!" I cheerfully said, letting go of it.
"I siphon the emotions out of ponies in order to live, and I can shapeshift nearly at will."
"And you've got really pretty eyes and you're cute!" I blurted, before covering my mouth with a hoof.
It narrowed its eyes at me, before sighing again.
"You wanted to name me?"
"Yes! You will be the best room-mate ever!" I declared, sweeping up the changeling in another hug despite its protests.
After a moment of intense hugging, I released the Changeling and set it down.
"Please warn me when you're going to do that. I don’t want you breaking my carapace. It's very painful to fix." It grumbled at me.
"Okay, but you've still got to choose whether you're a mare or stallion! Not going to lie, I would really, really prefer if you were a stallion. It’s up to you though, I can deal with it if you want to be a mare." I made a point of being sad at mentioning that it could choose to be a mare, in hopes that it would choose stallion.
"It really matters to you that much?" It asked.
"Well yeah, but... um..." I blushed heavily, realizing that what I was thinking about doing would probably not go well with the Changeling.
"Well, what?" It asked.
"Do you have genitalia?" I blurted before hiding my face.
"WHAT?!" It nearly shouted, making my ears fold back from the volume.
"Did you seriously just ask me that?!" It asked incredulously.
"Y-yes!" I squeaked.
"Impossible pony!" It responded, before flying away from me, leaving me to blush with embarrassment.
***
I avoided the changeling that was cleaning up the spilled chrysalis in the kitchen to explore the rest of my house. I found a basement with nothing in it, and went upstairs to find two bedrooms and another bathroom that was shared between the upstairs rooms. I guess it wouldn't be so bad, given the downstairs bathroom as well.
I flew downstairs and awkwardly drifted past the changeling, and opened the cupboards. There was a few cans of various fruit and vegetable soups, along with bowls, spoons and a moldy loaf of bread. I threw that into the garbage can, startling the changeling with the metallic clang of the lid falling down. I apologized and explored the bedrooms.
They were all identical, each room holding a Queen Size bed, an end table with a lamp and a closet for clothing. I didn't usually wear clothes outside of my uniform, so I decided to use it for personal storage until it got a dresser to store things in.
I had decided to take a nap on the bed, and later awoke to being poked by a hard hoof.
"Hey, wake up!" A voice hissed, and I jumped out of bed, bumping the changeling on accident.
"There’s somepony at the door!" the changeling was really worried.
"It’s okay, I'll deal with it." I said, giving it a quick hug before gliding downstairs.
I opened the door to Shining Armor and two Royal Guard outside.
"Novel! How are you settling in?" He asked, trying to look past me and into the house.
"Doing just fine, Captain! How're you?" I asked, moving myself to block his vision.
"Oh, just heard that there was some rumors going around about changelings having taken up residence in the old buildings we sent you to. Wondering if everything was alright?" He narrowed his eyes at me suspiciously.
"Yeah, everything has been great! Did you know that somepony left behind canned peaches? Those things are great. Didn't have canned food back in my day. I had to use my armored hoof to smash the thing open." I lied, making up stuff as I went along.
"You... smashed a can open with your armor?" He said, slightly reeling from what I had said.
"Well yeah, how else are you supposed to get those things open? I couldn't use my teeth because it was metal!"
“There’s... a pull tab. On the top of the can. You use your tongue." He deadpanned, looking at me like I was insane.
"That’s what that was? I thought it was for aiming." I faked surprise, but was also enlightened that I now knew how to open the confusing cans for later.
"Right... You're definitely not a changeling. Not knowing how to open a buckin-- I mean... See you around, Novel!" He abruptly motioned to his guards that they should leave in a hurry, as Shining tripped over my house's gate in his rush.
I closed the door, and turned to see the changeling with his mouth agape.
"That..." it started, unable to continue.
"Did I do something wrong?" I asked, pressed against the door and looking worried.
"That was masterful!" It cheered, crushing me in a hug as it buzzed excitedly and lifted us both from the floor.
"I’m... glad...you...approve." I rasped, before he set us down and smiled at me.
"You're still adorable." I said, poking his forehead.
"You're still confusing." the changeling replied.
We both looked at each other for a moment, before I spoke.
"So, have you chosen what you're going to look like?" I asked.
"You mean if I will be a mare or stallion?"
"Whatever you choose, I'll be fine with. I'd just really prefer-"
"Yes, I get that."
"Because I think you'd be really-"
"I understand, Novel!"
"You're hot!" I exclaimed, face burning at the changeling's expression of disbelief.
"You're not even lying... I can -feel- the attraction coming off of you like waves crashing into me. Most ponies would be disgusted or flowing with hatred, but you're...oh by the Queen. You're horny." it bluntly stated, looking down at my hind end.
"Eh...Eheh. Yeah." I tried to leave and save what little dignity I had left, as my arousal peaked to embarrassing levels.
"Ah, where are you going?" It asked, holding me back with a hoof poking into my chest.
"Um. To hide?" I squeaked.
"Not with all that emotion, you aren't. I still need to feed, but I’m going to make sure you don’t have an emotional meltdown like last time. If I’m going to be your room-mate, since you've been smacked in the head enough to even consider that an option, I’ve got to take care of you."
My head began swimming in fantasies of cuddling and sleeping together, but I was jarred from my daydreams by the changeling swatting my muzzle.
"No, not in that... Actually..." the changeling trailed off, scratching its carapace underneath its chin with a hoof absently.
"That could actually work." it said finally, following after me upstairs.
***
"Now, you wanted me to be a stallion because you're attracted to stallions, correct?" It asked.
"Yeah... I really like how there’s no confusion because stallions are straightforward, and that it’s easier to connect with them in general."
"Amongst the... other... reasons, correct?"
"The sexy reasons, yeah."
The changeling lay next to me belly down, as I lay on my back and continued to be aroused at the changeling's suggestion that we sleep together. Even if it was so it could siphon off ambient emotions that I had during my sleep. It didn't really bother me. I was just happy to have a cutie like that, that was willing to sleep in the same bed as me and not freak out like Lantern Light!
"Is that thing of yours supposed to be erect for this long?" It asked me, poking my erection with a hoof and making me squeak.
"Well, not normally. But there was this one time that--"
"I honestly don't want to know." the changeling stopped me with a hoof to my mouth so I couldn't speak.
"We're going to need a cover story, for why I’ve moved in."
"Mumm, mur muhmmess mn-" I mumbled from the changeling's hoof, before it released my mouth.
"You were saying?"
"Um, you were homeless and I let you stay at my place?" I offered.
"What, out of the kindness of your heart?" It replied sarcastically
"Well, I already asked Captain Shining Armor about it, and he said that it was up to me."
"You actually thought about that before you even got to your house? Do you realize what time you're living in?"
"Um... Not really, no. I just woke up about a week ago." I answered.
"I was going to eat you not even twelve hours ago. Since then, you've announced a crush on me, saved my carapace by giving me asylum from the Royal Guard, and now lay across from me on your bed with a throbbing erection."
"Yeah, and?" I asked, lifting a hind leg to try and cover said erection.
"You're impossible." The changeling sighed. "But you're also very lonely. Don't even say you aren’t, because I can feel it. You're also desperate for affection and attention. I can't generate emotion, not like you ponies can. You all have a level of emotion that is magically enhanced to ridiculous levels, perhaps that is why the Elements of Harmony work in the first place. Regardless, any relationship we would have would be completely one sided. I cannot generate love or affection, otherwise we changelings wouldn't need you ponies in the first place." the changeling explained, while I lay there and fantasized more about its wings, and what I could do with the holes in its hooves.
"Are you even listening?" It asked.
"Huh? Oh, yeah. I’m just still excited that you're considering being my roommate still!"
It looked down at my hard-on, and gave a pleasant sigh. "I can tell you're still excited. I just can’t understand the -why-."
"Well that easy. It's because you're a nice pony, and you're CUTE!" I exclaimed, pulling the changeling into a hug, hard penis be damned.
It looked into my eyes, before blankly stating, "Your cock is pressed into my underbelly."
I hugged the changeling closer, and wrapped all my hooves and both wings around it.  
"Don't care, you're still adorable and I'm not letting go until you feel loved and wanted."
"I think I’m feeling a bit more than loved." It squirmed, buzzing in annoyance as I squeezed tighter, willing every bit of me to love this strange bug pony.
The changeling gasped suddenly, making me alarmed and I let it go. Its horn was glowing a bright pink as I felt warmth draining out of me.
"What emotion is -this-?!" it exclaimed, buzzing rapidly as it lifted off of the bed and I fell off of it in exhaustion.
I groaned weakly, and couldn’t move as my body felt numb. The changeling began frantically flying around the room with a big goofy grin on its face.
"Is this Love?! How did you even- what- How?!" it exclaimed, before looking down at me as it's smile dropped off of its face into frightened shock.
"Oh no. Oh no-ohno-ohno. Look at me! Quick, say something!" It yelled, but I couldn’t feel anything or really be bothered to care at the moment. It was just going to leave me after it was done anyway. There was no point in getting excited about having a roommate if they're going to leave. Just like Night Breeze and Moon Sight. Just like--
"Snap out of it!" It shouted, smacking me across the face with a hoof.
"Oh, this is horrible!" It picked me up, and began buzzing around the room looking for the doorway to the outside.
Why did it care? I was going to eat me anyway. It should just leave me and go on to wherever it was that changelings go to after they drain a pony. That’s what they do, after all.
"I'm going to get you help, I’m not going to let you turn into a husk because I... No! You're not becoming a husk!" It declared, before it burst into a bright green fire and its body changed.
It, or He, had become a pegasus stallion. Dark blue coat and eyes like the sky. His mane was short and spikey, with a three color tone of White, light blue and royal blue from top to bottom. I couldn't see his cutie mark from where he held me in his hooves, but I didn’t really care at the moment either. It was easier to not care.
"I'm going to bring you to a hospital, maybe they can fix this. Oh please just let them FIX THIS." He blabbered to himself, hitting the front door with a sideways slam as it flew open, and he kicked it closed with a hind hoof.
"They've dealt with my kind before, they must have a way to fix this." He continued, as I stopped listening.
We were flying over the rooftops of Canterlot, away from my apartment and to a square high rise building with a large circled P on the roof. Probably for Pegasus. I guess that was the hospital?
"We're almost there, just don’t stop feeling, even if it’s horrible. Don’t stop feeling!" He cried, tears being whisked away by the wind as he sped towards the hospital.
But it’s easier to not feel anything, especially when all I feel is this horrible, crushing and tearing in my chest. It would be so much easier to just give up and not feel anymore. Less painful too.
"We're almost there, we're flying through the doors!" He shouted, bursting through a set of double doors into the hospital lobby.
"Somepony help!" he shouted in panic. "He's turning into a husk, I need help now!"
Being a husk doesn’t sound too bad. At least they don’t have to feel pain anymore.
"Where did you find him?" a mare's voice asked, as I was placed on a bed and strapped into it.
"He was... outside my house! I think he's one of the night guard!" he shouted, helping to push my bed through the halls as it burst through doors.
"He's a Bat Pony? Oh grief, I was hoping we would have more time to go over their physiology before we would have to deal with this!" I heard a familiar mare's voice say, but I couldn’t quite place it.
"Please tell me you can help him!" The changeling as a Pegasus begged.
"We'll do everything we can, Mister...?" the mare asked.
"... It’s not important right now, just help him!"
Why does he even care?
Why do I still care that he cares?
Why does anypony care?
Why are they putting a mask on me?
I yawned.
Wow... I'm really tired...
Darkness.

//-------------------------------------------------------//
                  Chapter 9: Royal Advice                  
//-------------------------------------------------------//
Chapter 9: Royal Advice
I had since been moved from my prison cell to the old Guest Chambers that I had stayed in. The changeling had returned as well, after holding more of a conference than an interrogation.
It was decided that since Captain Shining Armor and Princess Cadence's love was ultimately the one thing powerful enough to launch almost every changeling from Canterlot back to the Badlands, Love would be the main element in curing my condition. I had been suffering from massive emotional whiplash since the Changeling's desperate attempt to fix me in the hospital, and had since returned to a somewhat more stable condition.
"Are you feeling better?" The changeling asked. It wasn't shapeshifted, and buzzed a few times in worry as it stood next to my spot on the bed. Since the Changeling and I had formed an emotional connection, one that wasn't simply host and parasite, the Changeling was 'sentenced' to be my caretaker until I recovered, and ordered to remain at my house until a more permanent solution presented itself.
"A lot better, thanks." I replied. I had a bad of ice water on my head for some reason, with a thermometer. "I don't think emotional whiplash brings on a cold..."
"Oh, you're right. My bad." It replied with embarrassment. Since the changeling had taken so much of my emotion, it was able to process them far more efficiently and soon able to generate its own. It explained that the development was what allowed it to transfer my emotions back to me. After my temper had cooled and I was more stable, I was just glad that it wasn't hurt.
"Don't worry about it, silly." I teased. Rolling over in the bed towards the changeling, I motioned for it to join me as I scooted myself backwards to the other side of the large circular bed. "Do you want to lay down with me? It's a lot warmer under the covers than it is out there." I said, motioning with a hoof to the rest of the room before retreating my hoof back to the safety of the covers.
"You're not worried something like last time is going to happen?" It asked, looking concerned and squinting an eye at me with a tilted head.
"Nope, now get on in here!" I beckoned.
The changeling lifted the covers and awkwardly scooted next to me, wings to its side. It was looking up towards the ceiling with its front hooves dangling over the edge of the covers.
I lay on my side, staring at the awkward changeling and propping my head up with a free forehoof.
"You look silly." I said.
"What's silly about how I look? I thought you said I looked cute." It pouted.
"You're lying in bed with me, and staring up at the ceiling. You're not gonna hurt me just cuddling." I pointed out. Besides, I'm not gonna get to know you very well if you stay in your carapace all the time."
"I can't get out of my carapace! That would be like asking you to climb out of your skeleton." It protested, looking at me.
"Hey, you did it!" I cheered, and explained after its confused look. "You looked anywhere but the ceiling."
"Oh, right." It grumbled, shifting into a more comfortable position.
"So, I still have to name you, you know."
"What were you thinking of calling me?" It asked in anticipation.
"Well, I saw that blue Pegasus you turned into and I was wondering what you gave him for a cutie mark."
"I gave it a generic one. Just some wings on a rock. Usually call it Stone Flight." It explained.
"Hmm. Well I was thinking about how we met."
"You mean where I tried to eat you?"
"Well, I was thinking more about how you helped me after the Chrysalis, and the fact that we cuddled afterward. Yeah I was out of my mind, but you were still kind. You could've just killed me when I got out, but you decided to take care of me."
"Oh... I did do that, didn't I?" It replied, oddly remorse.
"Hey, don't go worrying about things you don't have to worry about. Everything turned out fine! You even got a pardon from the Princesses, technically." I reminded it.
"Well how does that help with my name?"
"Think about it. You helped me in the hospital as well by returning all of my emotions, even if I was more than a jerk afterwards. You're even here right now, and I think it’s less to do with the Princess' orders and more because you wanted to."
"That's true."
"When we were in the dungeon, you still tried to comfort me and be there for me even when I was being horrible to you. I don't know anypony that would've done what you did, and I can't thank you enough for it."
"I felt bad for what I did, and I already went over everything with the Princesses and the Guard Captain."
"But that’s what I'm talking about. You're very patient, you're kind, you care about ponies even if they don’t care about you, and you keep giving ponies second chances. I can't express how much I adore that about you." I said, moving closer to him and embracing him in a hug.
"So that helps with my name, how?" It asked, turning over so that we were able to look another in the eyes.
"Because it helps me build a story around your name that has meaning. A lot of the time, ponies will name their foal and not know a thing about them, usually because the foal is just a foal and doesn't have a personality yet. The name sort of shapes the Pony. In this case, you're already your own being, so we need a name that suits what you are."
"Well, I'm a changeling. But I don't think 'Changey' would work. Neither would Shifty."  
I laughed, and hugged it closer to me with a squeak of appreciation.
"No, silly. I'm going to name you Soft Heart. Because you're everything that a creature seeking love should be. Besides, you haven't done a single overly mean thing to me since we met!" I nuzzled his carapace covered muzzle.
"I tried to eat you!" Soft protested, and I silenced his protests by covering his mouth with a hoof.
"Shoosh, you! You're a good Changeling and nothing you say will make me think otherwise. You don't have to use your pony form when you're around me, but other ponies won't be as accepting of us. I'm perfectly alright with that, but I have a new idea for your cutie mark."
"Mum muff ma?" He said, muffled by my hoof.
"You should change it to a heart made of feathers, 'cause nothing is softer than Pegasus feathers!" I took my hoof off of his mouth, and gave him another full body hug, wings included.
He groaned a little from the pressure on his carapace, but relented and hugged me back soon enough.
***
I had gone through a lot in the past month and a half. Revived from being a statue for a thousand years, being reintegrated in a society that was similar to my own, but different in many ways and attacked by a changeling whom I soon came to love.
However, all of this wasn't to be the end of the story. We had moved back to my house and renovated it fairly quickly, given that Soft Heart was exceptional at construction due to being a drone in the hive. The problem came from our neighbors, who would see the flashes of green magic coming from our house and complaining about the noise at night.
I was able to explain it away as a new oven that I was testing for a bakery, and the flames were magical in order to bake the food faster. The problem with that is they wanted samples. I bluffed and told them that it was still very experimental and needed to go through more testing, and they bought the story.
The challenging part, was our schedules. Soft Heart had taken a job at the hospital in the 'changeling treatment ward', where he would help to cure those who had suffered Huskification like I had. He kept his disguise up during his shift, and reverted to his adorable self when he got home. I had continued my service in the Night Guard, serving as the greeter and integrator for the new 'batches' of Night Guard that would panic when they were revived.
We both arrived from our work nearly exhausted. Some days were easier than others of course, and we were able to enjoy each other's company as well as the sexier of after work activities, like showering together and cuddling after dinner. Night Breeze and Moon Sight had proposed to another at the same time during a 'First Batch Reunion' party that Soft Heart and myself had attended, and Lantern Light had been possessed enough to date Charmed.
Presently however, there was a certain filly at our doorstep trying to bring me back from my expositional monologue.
"Hey. Mister!" The filly shouted, and I looked down to find Ghost Trapper in a Filly Scout's outfit with a box of cookies hovering in her telekinesis.
"Oh, hey Ghost Trapper! How've you been?" I asked, lowering myself to her eye level.
"I joined the Filly Scouts! Want to buy some cookies?" She asked.
"Do we really need cookies, though?" Soft Heart asked me, before looking down at the filly.
"Please mister, I get prizes and a cool badge if I bring in the most bits for cookies!" she begged, pulling out another box of cookies from the small red cart she had been pulling behind her.
"Do we have the bits for it?" Soft asked, looking at me.
"Pleaaaaaase?" She begged, and it was too late for Soft Heart. She had the biggest puppy dog eyes I had ever seen, complete with pouting lips and her ears backwards to complete the saddest expression I had ever seen on a filly.
"Oooh, that is masterful!" Soft Heart abruptly cheered, smiling at the filly.
"Huh?" Ghost Trapper blurted, her money winning expression evaporating like morning fog in her confusion.
"Let me try that!" Soft grinned, before mirroring the puppy dog eyes and pouty face that Ghost had attempted to use on the Changeling to manipulate his emotions.
"Awww, that’s no fair!" She pouted.
"Hehehe, it’s okay, Ghost. I'd love to buy some cookies." I chuckled, taking out a small pouch of bits to pay for a few boxes of thin chocolate mint cookies. They had been my favorites a thousand years ago, and they still sold them!
"I'll get some of those Coconut ones." Soft said, pointing to a box of cookies on her cart.
"Yay!" Ghost cheered, lifting the boxes as well as a few bonus ones as she counted out the bits on the walkway to our door.
"Thanks Mister Thought, Thanks Mister Heart!" She called, pulling her cart in her magical grip while trotting happily away to the next victims of her weaponized cuteness.
Closing the door and bringing our hoard of cookies with us to the kitchen, Soft Heart gave me a playful nudge with his rump, knocking me to the side for a moment.
"Hey!" I playfully protested, returning the bump with a bit more force.  
Soft bumped into a wall, knocking some of the boxes from his back before he righted himself.
"Hey yourself!" He called back playfully, and we set down our boxes of cookies to go relax on the couch in the living room. It was our first joint day off in a few weeks, and we were enjoying the time that we had managed to snag together.
He flashed back to his changeling self, and huddled next to me on the couch.
"So, what should we do on our day off?" he asked, playing with one of my fuzzy ears with his holed hoof.
"I was thinking we could go to the park, look around and see what’s changed from a thousand years ago. Or we could go to the Everfree Forest! That place is even wilder than I remember. I got to go there as part of an exercise for the Night Guard." I rattled off a few more ideas before he stopped me with a hoof.
"Hey, anything is good as long as we do it together, okay?" He said, nuzzling me and resting his head atop of mine as we lay flat on the couch.
"That’s perfect for me, love." I smiled, feelings of love blooming in my chest.
He sighed comfortably, as I felt a slight drain. I was used to his need to feed now, and I wasn't affected by the shift in emotion as heavily as I used to. He explained that love was an incredibly intense emotion compared to all others, and just a bit of it would let him survive for weeks. Since we had moved in together and gotten more acquainted, I’m certain I was making him fat with love. Not that he would actually get fat, being in a carapace. Besides, love burns calories, doesn't it?
"Feel better?" I asked, wiggling around to try and have him lay on top of my belly.
"Much better, love." Soft Heart replied, nestling himself into me closely.
Yep. Everything was going perfect for me now. I just hope it stayed this way forever.
Author's Note
I would like to thank those that commented on my last chapter for their helpful criticism. It took me a while to re-aim my focus in the story, but hopefully this chapter will being things back on track.
I had taken a short break from writing this story to begin a separate one that I will be uploading Saturday, as thats the only time i have access to a screen large enough to accept the submit story prompt.
Many thanks to those that have read my story this far, as this has received far better reviews than I expected! I will continue to update this story, so no fears to it being unfinished forever.

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                  Chapter 10: Poison Joke                  
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Chapter 10: Poison Joke
Night Breeze, Moon Sight, Lantern Light and I had been sent on a night route for the Everfree Forest near Ponyville. It used to be my old station, and I had been told that even though the forest was known for its unpredictability, that our unit was the best choice to patrol the area.
There had been reports of Diamond Dogs in the area, attacking traveling ponies at night as well as being a source of thievery and deforestation. A team of weather Pegasai had spotted a clearing being cut near the center of the forest while they were setting up a shower for the following day.
Our mission was to travel far enough into the forest and mark where the Diamond Dog camp was, so that a team of Royal Guard could assault the Bandit's makeshift fort in the forest. We had been given a short briefing on some of the new species that had popped up in the area, like Manticores and Cockatrice.
What they failed to mention, however, was the plant life.
"Hey everypony, I don't feel right." I complained, my insides feeling like they were trying to perform ballet. I was holding my gut with both hooves as I plopped myself on the ground next to a large rock, leaning against it.
"It was just a light thicket, Novel. Don't be such a whiner." Lantern Light huffed, looking behind us to watch out for animal life or Diamond Dogs.
"Hey, it could be something serious. He got scratched by one of those plants so maybe he's been poisoned!" Night Breeze voiced with concern, hovering above us to get a better view of the area.
"Or he could just be tired. I don't think he gets much exercise with all the paperwork he goes through. When was the last time you had a field op?" Moon Sight asked, taking up the front because she was the most able to fend off attacks as well as the sturdiest of the group.
I doubled over in pain, as my internals fought desperately to become my externals, and cried out in pain.
"AAAAAAGGGGHHH!!!" I fell onto the forest floor, convulsing with my vision blotting out or swimming in bright color.
"Oh Celesta, he's freaking out!" Night Breeze announced, swooping down to my side with helplessness as she tried to hold me down and prevent me from hurting myself.
"What scratched him?" Lantern Light asked, backing up to move towards me while still keeping an eye out on the dark forest.
"I think it was some kind of blue plant thing. I saw it reach out for him and then it just gave him a tiny nick on his hind leg." Moon Sight stated calmly, also moving back towards me as my seizure stopped abruptly and I relaxed.
My entire body hurt, but I wasn’t freaking out anymore. I blinked the blurriness out of my sight to see Night Breeze's shocked expression, her jaw dropped and sides of her mouth twitching.
"What?" I asked, before I realized my voice was even higher in pitch than before. I put a hoof to my throat in confusion, before realizing it was smaller than I was used to. Holding out my forehooves, I saw that they were dainty compared to what I had before. I looked further down myself and noticed a distinct lake of male anatomy.
"Oh no!" I squeaked, my rediculously high pitched voice was even squeakier than my previously feminine stallion's voice. But to replace it with that of an actual mare's...
"Pffft! Bahahaa!" Night Breeze burst out laughing, holding her belly as she fell backwards and landed with a metallic thud from her armor protecting her head that had shot backward onto the ground.
"What? What’s goin... Haah! No way!" Lantern Light joined in after having looked sideways to see my new Mare-endowed self.
"Moon, Look at this!" Night Breeze managed to say in-between bouts of laughter.
I turned to see Moon Sight look at me, our eyes locking before she gave a fiendish smirk.
"Hey, now we got somepony to add to our threesome, and maybe Lantern Light will cuddle with Novvie now!" She teased, pointing a hoof and laughing at me before using said hoof to stomp on the ground in barely controlled merriment.
"Guys, it's not funny!" I whined, covering my face with my hooves in embarrassment.
"D'aaawww, Lookit how shy she is!" Night Breeze joked, holding the sides of my armored face and moving my head back and forth like a Grandmare messing with the face of her grand foal.
"Who's a widdle filly? Who's a widdle filly? You're a widdle filly! Yes you are!" She said in a baby voice to me, rocking my head around and causing my ill-fitting helmet to bounce on my head.
"We've got a mission to do!" I protested, trying to keep my helmet on as the rest of my armor clanked around loosely.
"Yes we do! The widdle filly and her fwends have a mission to complete!" She continued, before dropping her hooves from my face and setting the helmet that had fallen over my nose back to my head.
I stood up after the laughter had died down, and noticed I was at least a head shorter than everypony else.
"Oh no, don't tell me I’m not –actually- a filly!" I cried, my high pitched and squeaky voice turning what was supposed to be a dignified outburst into a whine.
They all looked at me, before Lantern Light put a hoof to his chin in thought.
"Well, you still have your cutie mark from what I can see. I think you've just been knocked down a few pegs." He said, patting my head with an armored hoof, causing some light clanking from the armor disagreeing with its treatment. I held out my ill-fitting armored hoof, and noticed that it nearly fell off just raising it. None of my armor was fitting properly anymore, as it was all fitted to my taller stallion self.
"But... I'm at least a -mare-, right? I'm not a little filly?" I pouted, looking up at Lantern Light who was now over a foot and a half taller than I was.
"Well, you're little. But I don’t think whatever than plant was turned you into a kid. You're just a pipsqueak of a mare." Lantern Light observed.
"You're also adorable!" Night Breeze added, but I shook off one of my hoof guards and flung it past her head.
"Ooh! Mare-Novvie is feisty!" Moon Sight teased, giving me a playful shove but sending my body flying off into the brush nearby. My head was still spinning as they flew over, landing lightly despite their armor thanks to the intensive training we had been receiving on account of being inactive for a few months.
"I don't think this armor is going to do much good." I sighed, wiggling out of the loose fitting armor as it clanked down onto the ground. I spent a few moments to pack it away in my rations bag at the bottom with the food sitting on top so it wouldn't be crushed.
"Alright. We've still got a mission to do, and I bet that this will either wear off somehow, or there’s a cure for it. So let’s just find the Diamond Dogs and report back to the post in Ponyville." I said, taking up my mantle as the Officer for the mission, despite my absurdly ill equipped form for the task.
"You want me to carry that armor of yours?" Moon Sight offered.
"I should be able to carry it, but if I can't then I'll let you know." I replied. I might not be as built as I was before, but I would still try to carry my own weight if I could.
***
"Hey Movvie, try flying up near the treeline to get a better look at the layout." Lantern Light suggested, using my new nickname of Movvie (Mare-Novvie) to make a playful jab at me.
"Fine, Lantern." I huffed, jumping into a hover before I flew just over the treeline to see the lit camp of the Diamond Dogs.
There was a tall tree log wall around the perimeter of the camp. A few smaller tents surrounded one large circus tent in the center, with what looked like a butcher's area toward the eastern side of the camp. Diamond Dogs were carnivores, of course. I just hoped that none of that meat was pony. There was a single gate leading towards our observation spot on the ground, with two fairly large and intimidating guards on watch in the battlements behind the gate. They had makeshift iron armor with crude bladed weapons. They couldn't really be considered swords, as they looked more like slabs of jagged metal with handles bolted onto them. They were massive however, built for the frames that the Diamond Dogs could bring to bear and would cleave any one of us in half with a single strike.
Princess Celestia, in her 'infinite wisdom' had decided against using weapons after the Coup of Nightmare Moon, and had thus left us fairly defenseless against that kind of weaponry. Our armor was enchanted to protect against strikes, but if any of our fleshy bits were hit, we would be done.
I couldn't even wear my armor now, thanks to my new fail, skinny and short mare form. I was still a Bat pony with the same coloration and cutie mark, but as far as I could tell the only change had been turning me into a mare and making me shorter.  
My rose tinted night vision spotted a far larger Diamond Dog coming out of the large center tent. He wore segmented steel armor that was colored red, with a plumed helmet on his head signifying his rank. Whatever rank that would be. I just assumed that meant he was a leader.
My ears twitched as I picked up his faint yelling.
"You, move boxes there! You, bring weapons here! You, bring me flying pony over there!" He yelled, finally pointing directly at me.
"Oh Horseapples!" I swore, diving back into the treeline and towards my allies to warn them.
I had overshot their position in my panic, and landed silently behind them.
"Hey! We have to get out of here!" I whisper shouted, causing them to nearly jump out of their armor at my sudden 'hey!’
"Spotted?" Night Breeze asked, and I nodded.
We took off in flight directly up and away from the Diamond Dog camp, a few nets being flung at us but mercifully missing by several feet. Their angry howls sent shivers down my body, but we had made it safely away from their encampment. Our mission was to scout anyway, so no combat was good with me.
***
"Where's Lieutenant Thought? Who's the mare?" The captain of the Ponyville guard asked, looking suspiciously at me before looking at Lantern Light.
"The mare -is- the Lieutenant, Captain." He explained, smirking for a moment before regaining his composure.
"He... 'She' is the Lieutenant?" He asked, perplexed.
"I was attacked by some blue plant life, and a scratch from it turned me into this." I chirped in my high pitched voice, feeling out of place speaking like this.
"Right... Well, whatever happened can be fixed by some magic from some unicorn, no doubt. Give me your report as soon as you've written it. Dismissed!" He ordered, as the others filed out I mouthed over a scroll that I had written on.
"What's this?" He asked, taking the scroll in his hooves.
"It's the report. I wrote it while we had time flying back here." I replied with a smile.
The Captain blinked a few times in disbelief, before shrugging it off and dismissing me.
***
I found our impromptu barracks was actually a treehouse library. The lavender unicorn that was its Librarian had allowed us to spend the night, and her peculiar pet dragon had insisted on making us tea.
"So, are you enjoying your stay in Ponyville?" The unicorn asked, using her telekinesis to pour out some of the tea into cups while looking nervously excited at us.
"Yeah, this place hasn't changed much but it’s still a nice place." Moon Sight replied, sipping her tea cup grasped in her hooves without noise.
The unicorn finished pouring our tea, before setting down the teapot. "Oh, I just remembered! I forgot to introduce myself. My name is Twilight Sparkle, and Spike is my assistant here in the Library." She said warmly. "What' your names?"
"My name is Moon Sight, The stallion is Lantern Light, the mare next to him is Night Breeze, and our C.O. is Novel Thought." Moon Sight said, introducing all of us.
"Novel Thought? Does that mean you write books by chance?" She asked, looking at me hopefully.
"Well, I would if I had the time. It’s just handy for paperwork really..." I squeaked, before cringing at my voice.
"What's wrong?" Twilight asked, worried.
"Well, he... er- she, ran into some weird blue plant that nicked her in the Everfree forest. Turned into a mare on the spot shortly after. Still getting used to the voice I suppose." Lantern Light replied.
"Wait, was it an all blue flower with thorns on the stem, and did it reach out to grab you?" she asked, looking at her baby dragon assistant who soon ran off in search of something.
"Um... Yeah?" I said confused.
"Got it!" I heard Spike call out, bringing a large book labeled "Supernaturals: Natural Remedies and Cure-Alls That Are Simply Super" and setting it down on our table with a thud.
I shared a look of skepticism with my fellow bat ponies, before Twilight declared
"Aha!", finding the plant in her book.
"I remember encountering this plant before. It's called 'Poison Joke' and needs a special bath to get rid of the effects." she stated happily, before her expression dropped.
"Oh, I just remembered that Zecora is on Vacation to see her family back in Zebreca... I'm sure it will be fine, though! I'll be sure to let her know when she gets back, and we can get the bath mix all ready for you when she can get the ingredients. I couldn't ask you to go back out there into the Everfree with all those Diamond Dogs wandering around, and so late at night on top of it!" she closed the book before floating it over to Spike, who dutifully returned it.
"Now, I have a space prepared upstairs where I keep my telescope. You're free to stay there as long as you need to for your mission, but please don't touch the telescope. I'm working on a special project for Princess Celestia and I need it for my research." she explained, taking off her thick black and square glasses she had worn to read a few pages of the book before.
"Thank you for the hospitality, Miss Sparkle." Moon Sight said, finishing her tea and nudging Night Breeze.
"Oh yeah, Thank you!" Night Breeze blurted, getting the hint.
Twilight raised a hoof to stop the calls of thank you's before Lantern and myself could chime in.
"Don't worry about it. You're all my guests and you don't have to thank me for letting you spend a few nights." Twilight said, lowering her hoof.
"I need to get some sleep, it's been a long day and I have a lot of studying to do in the morning. Feel free to drop by after you're done with your assignment, by the way. The library is usually open." She said with a yawn, before waving goodbye and climbing up the stairs to her bed next to a window.
"Well, I think we should all get some sleep too. All in favor of a group cuddle, for old time's sake?" Night Breeze whispered loud enough for all of us to hear.
"Novvie should cuddle with Lantern Light! Being a cute mare and all, there’s no way he could object!" Moon Sight teased, while I blushed and Lantern Light crossed his hooves against his chest.
"Nope. I got Charmed now, so I ain’t cuddlin' with anypony else." He stated firmly.
"Awww. It’s okay, Novvie. You can still sleep with us!" Night Breeze cheered quietly, picking me up and flying us up the stairs.
"Hey, you got really light weight being a filly." She commented, tossing me upwards into the air slightly before catching me easily.
I grumbled, but with my voice it turned out to be more of a squeaky whimpering.
Well. Being a filly isn't too bad. I just hope it isn't forever.
No, I’m not tempting fate again!
I won't be a filly forever!
Wait...
Author's Note
This chapter took a bit longer to get out than it should've, thanks to a chance encounter with Vanilla Icecream. Apparently it makes my creativity turn off so i just couldnt think of what to write at all until today.
Hope you're all enjoying the story, and all comments are greatly appreciated!

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                 Chapter 11: Messy Memory                  
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Chapter 11: Messy Memory
I awoke to an owl hooting at me.
"Who?" It asked.
"Bleugh..." I complained, before covering my face with a pillow as it pulled the blinds open, waking Night Breeze and Moon Sight with the sun's glare.
"Who?" It demanded.
"Go away!" I snapped grumpily.
"Who?" It persisted.
I roughly pointed a hoof between the sleepy Bat ponies.
"Me, Novel Thought. She's Night Breeze, and she's Moon Sight. Stallion over there is Lantern Light." I grumbled, shifting in my oversized sleeping bag.
"Who?" It continued.
"I just told you!" I complained.
"Who?" It mercilessly drove on.
"Bat ponies!" I yelled, hiding my head underneath the pillow to drown out the ever continuing questions.
"Who?" It challenged
"Night Guard!"
"Who?" I swear it taunted me.
"Make it stop!" I screamed into my pillow, getting upset at the bird.
There was a pause of silence for a few moments, before I lifted my head from the pillow to stare at the Owl. Its eyes narrowed at me.
"Who?"
"That's it!" I declared, throwing my pillow at the bird before it flew out of the way, sending my pillow through the open window and a few stories down onto the road below.
"Aaauugh!" I yelled, getting to my hooves and attempting to run from the interrogating feathered menace.
"Hey!" I heard Spike complain, but I was too concerned with escaping the horrific
'Who?' of the owl. I had run down the stairs past him, nearly knocking over the stack of books he was carrying but thanks to my dainty filly-self, I was able to slip past.
Wait. Why does it feel strange to call myself a filly?
I stopped in my tracks down the stairs, confusion overwhelming me. I reviewed my memories and how I got to where I am now.
Canterlot, New mission, getting everypony ready, going to the Everfree, spotting the camp, reporting back, having tea with Twilight, then going to bed.  
Why does something feel like its missing?
"Hey Novvie, How’s it hangin'?" I heard Night Breeze ask, patting my back as she walked down the steps past me, followed by Moon Sight and a very groggy Lantern Light.
"Hey Boss." Moon Sight said in passing.
"Hey Novel, do you think they serve breakfast this early?" He asked, rubbing his eyes with the ankle above his hoof.
"I don't think that Ms. Sparkle runs a bed and breakfast, Lantern." I replied, shaking the befuddlement of earlier from my head before following him down the steps.  
"Did anypony see who threw a pillow?" A pillow wearing Twilight Sparkle asked, lifting said fluffy head resting device from her head with magic, resting it on a chair nearby.
"Oops." I said, offering an apology.
"Why did you throw a pillow out of the window?" She asked, her head turned sideways and an eye squinting in confusion.
"Who?" I heard the owl ask, fluttering down to land on the backrest of the chair with the pillow.
"You!" I blurted, pointing my tiny hoof at the flying fiend.
"Who?" it responded, faking innocence on its devious bird face.
"You've met Owlowicious I see." she smiled, looking at the bird and then at me.
"It woke me up and interrogated me!"
"Interrogated you? He's an owl. A very smart owl, but still a bird." Twilight said skeptically.
"That bird is evil!" I heard Spike declare from the top of the steps before retreating back to whatever it was that Library assistant baby dragons do.
"Uhg, not this again." Twilight said, facehoofing.
"Alright, let’s just take you over to Sugarcube Corner for some breakfast, okay?" She offered.
"Sounds good to me!" Night Breeze said for all of us, as the three of them put on their Night Guard armor and I stared at Owlowicious, who returned the look with a glare of suspicion at me.
***
We walked through the door to Sugarcube Corner with a tinkling bell to announce our presence, before my face was assaulted with confetti.
"Surprise!" I heard a happy mare's voice call out, flinging more confetti from her hooves as she hopped over the table and picked me up in a squishing hug.
"What's...going..." I managed to say while being crushed in the very strong and very pink earth pony's grasp. My face was scrunched up against her chest as she hugged my entire body at once.
I'm fairly certain that my hind legs aren't supposed to bend that way.
She released me, and I fell to the floor in a heap. I was catching my breath after the life had been hugged out of me while the energetic mare continued.
"I just love meeting new ponies and I saw you all flying into Ponyville last night and I knew you'd be hungry so I decided to make a big cake and wait here to celebrate when you came looking for food because everypony comes to Sugarcube Corner for food in the morning because--" She was interrupted by Twilight, who had said her name a few times before finally shouting.
"Pinkie Pie!"
"Yeah?" Pinkie responded.
"They get it." She huffed, before helping me off of the floor.
"Oh, that’s super! Let me go get your 'Welcome-to-Ponyville' cake!" she said, before zipping out of existence from moving so quickly that a cloud shaped version of herself had lingered for a second, before being replaced by Pinkie Pie balancing a large cake on a single hoof.
"Here you go!" She cheered, setting the cake on my head which I managed to balance with difficulty before Twilight lifted it from my head and set it on a nearby table.
"Thanks, Pinkie." Twilight said, used to the antics of her apparent friend.
Pinkie Pie then zipped off someplace else, and we collectively sat down to enjoy the quadruple decked strawberry vanilla shortcake with chocolate frosting and several cherries on top.
"So Novvie, How's being a mare treating you?" She asked, taking a bite out of her slice without a fork.
"What do you mean?" I asked, poking at my cake with some suspicion.
"Novvie, you became a mare yesterday. You're telling me nothin's changed?" Lantern Light questioned.
"Wait, what?" I said abruptly, my fork falling from my hoof onto the plate.
"Yeah, we were in the Everfree, you ran into a blue plant and now you're a mare. You don't remember?" Moon Sight asked, as they all stared at me in concern.
"Um... Haven't I always been a mare?" I asked, completely confused and feeling like they were pulling a prank on me.
"Oh no... The Poison Joke must be affecting your memory. I was only affected with it for a couple of hours, but you've spent almost a day's time with it." Twilight said, eyebrows furrowing in concentration.
"No really. You're messing with me, right?" I said, looking between them in concern.
"There was a report of a Royal Guard encountering Poison Joke, but it took them nearly a month for them to transform into a mare. From what you've said, it was only an hour at most. Your body must be really sensitive to changes and magic in general for it to have progressed so quickly." Twilight continued, eyes flickering in thought as she mentally jumped from subject to subject in her head.
"You're definitely messing with me." I stated, convinced that this was a prank.
Night Breeze, Lantern Light and Moon Sight looked with worry between them, as Twilight was off in thought.
"We're not messin' with you, Novel. You got turned into a mare yesterday." Lantern Light said seriously.
I looked down at my cake, processing what they had said.
How could I have been a stallion? I had a Stallion back home, and that’s what everypony is supposed to do. Mares find a Stallion, Stallions find a mare. Why would I have a Stallion if I was a Stallion as well? That’s not how things work!
"No, you're got to be messing with me. Why would I have a stallion in my house if i was a stallion as well?" I questioned, getting defensive.
"Because you're gay, Novel!" Lantern blurted.
"But I don’t like mares! How can I be gay?" I asked, confused.
"You used to be a Stallion, Novel. You liked Stallions too." Moon Sight said, calmer than Lantern Light.
"No I didn't! I've always been a mare!" I protested.
"Wait! I know what’s going on. The Poison Joke is altering your memories to make you believe that you've always been a mare, because the joke is supposed to be that since you were so effeminate before, that you might as well be a mare." Night Breeze stated, showing pride in her deduction.
"That's probably what's going on. I just don't know if this will be permanent unless we get you the cure in time." Twilight said, coming out of her thought process.
"I don't want to be a Stallion! I've always been a mare, and I like how I am now!" I protested, getting out of my seat and moving backwards from the group.
"Hey there, Grumpy face!" I heard a yell behind me, to wheel around and come muzzle to muzzle with Pinkie Pie.
"What's all the shouting for, is somepony playing a game?" She asked.
"They're trying to tell me that I was a Stallion yesterday, and that I only recently became a mare!" I complained.
She grabbed my face with her hooves and pulled on my cheeks in circles before letting them go with a flop.
"You look like a mare to me, lady!" She declared, before leaving the shop with several boxes of cupcakes, some confetti, flags and a banner.
An exasperated sigh was heard behind me, as Twilight rested her head on the table.  
"I'll figure out a way to fix this, just go do what you have to do for the day and come back tonight. I don't want you all getting in trouble." She said, taking part of the cake  
with her on a plate as she left Sugarcube Corner.
"Well. Guess we'll deal with it later." Lantern Light huffed, as the group left their seats and I followed behind them to report back to the Captain in Ponyville.
***
"The report states that you've seen the Diamond Dogs armed with heavy armor, large weapons and a leader in red. We don't have the numbers for an assault garrisoned in Ponyville, but we could get them. The standard procedure is to talk with them first, and see what they want. Since they've been attacking Ponies out in the forests and on the roads nearby, I'm not going to send somepony to get killed trying to talk with the brutes. You four need to keep an eye on that camp while we send a message to Canterlot for reinforcements." The captain explained, as we sat in the Mayor's office.
"You're certain that these Diamond Dogs won't attack Ponyville in the meantime, Captain?" The Mayor asked.
"There are too many ponies here, along with the bearers of the Elements of Harmony. They won't move on the town." He reassured her.
"What, are they gonna zap the great evil of the Diamond Dogs away with a rainbow?" Lantern snorted, his forehooves crossed against his chest while sitting in a chair.
"I'm not sure how they work, but I know Twilight took care of an Ursa Minor single hoofed. I’m sure she and her friends can handle a few Diamond Dogs." The captain said.
"If I remember correctly, I think it was Rarity that outsmarted her Diamond Dog captors simply by whining. They can't be -that- much of a threat." The mayor added.
"They can be, if they're desperate." I explained. "They used to have large warbands that would attack outlying villages for resources, or for the ponies themselves. I don't know how much they've changed in a thousand years, but they're smart, crafty and vicious." I said, receiving a few amused looks from the Captain and Mayor before they burst out laughing.
"Oh! Oh my, I'm sorry." The mayor said, wiping away some moisture from her eyes.
"Diamond Dogs are idiots. They speak only in the most basic of sentences and can’t figure out their paw from their food. The fact that they've managed to make a bandit camp is nothing short of genius for their lot." The captain chuckled, before becoming serious again.
"The fact is, we're taking this as a threat because they've attacked ponies and they're armed. Normally a Diamond Dog will run in a pack of two to five others, and do whatever it is that Diamond Dogs do." he said.
"So, to the mission. You want us to keep scouting and report movement?" I asked.
"Yep. We need at least one of you to report back every hour so we can stay up to date. We need to know where to send the guard for when things get dicey." The captain answered.
"Yes, Captain. We can do that." I replied with a Batpony salute, joined by my squad. The captain gave us a confused look before returning with the Royal Guard salute of hoof leveled with eyebrow.
***
"Hey, think if I run into some Poison Joke, I can get a dick -and- a vagina?" Moon Sight asked Night Breeze, nudging her with an elbow as we perched in a tree near the camp.
"I think it would probably just make sure you didn't have -any- genitals at that point, Moonie." She replied, giving Moon a smile when she pouted in fake disappointment.
"Is this all you two talk about?" Lantern Light asked, looking at the two of them.
"Hey, if you hung out with us more than you'd know us even better!" Night whispered back.
"I'm not sure I -want- to know what you two do in bed." Lantern replied, turning his head back to the camp.
The Diamond Dogs had done some upgrading. There was now a deep trench filled with sharpened spikes all around the wall of their camp, and they were working on a tower for the gate. The Butcher's Corner had something new to work with; A manticore by the looks of it. The large chitinous stinger was being peeled apart, and the segments were being attached to helmets in an attempt to strengthen them.
"They don't seem dumb." Moon Sight observed.
"Maybe they have a smart leader?" I offered.
"How do you think they spotted you last night, Novvie?" Night asked.
"I don't know. I was staying close to the treeline, and their leader was barking out orders. All of a sudden he just looked at me and yelled for some...doggy? What would a Diamond Dog say for a plural to refer to their species?" I asked, getting off track.
"I'm pretty sure that somedoggy seems racist." A mare's voice suddenly said, revealing Pinkie Pie in green and black face paint with a strange netted helmet on her head, hanging upside down from a branch above us.
"Aaa-mmf!" I yelped in surprise, before she placed a hoof in my mouth to silence me.
"Shh!" She hissed, dropping down onto the same branch we were all on.
"We gotta be quiet if we're throwing them a surprise party!" She whispered.
"Pinkie, we’re not throwing them a party. We're watching them." I explained.
"Oooh! Like spy ponies!" She cheered in a hush, taking out a device of two cylinders joined together with glass circles at the ends.
"What is that?" Night asked, pointing at the thing.
"Binoculars, silly!" She stated, before looking through them at the camp. I moved my head to stare at the ends of the binoculars to see her eyes being magnified by the contraption.
"Creepy." I said to myself, leaning back.
"What's creepy?" I heard a voice bark from below us.
Author's Note
My second chapter in the same day, hopefully makes up for the shorter chapters overall. Good to be back and writing again. I might post another chapter or two, but the writing ive done in the past 3 hours has me burnt from writing over 5k words. Thank you for reading!

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              Chapter 8: Beds Are Comfortable              
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Chapter 8: Beds Are Comfortable
Why does anypony -ever- get out of bed in the first place? I mean, sure, you’d have to use the restroom and eat at some point, but not if you have ponies to help you with all of that so you don't have to move.
"Do you know what's wrong with him? Can we fix it?" Night Breeze asked, joined by Moon Sight, Lantern Light, The Changeling I'll get to name at some point, and Captain Shining Armor.
"So far, from what this stallion that won't tell us his name has stated, saw Novel Thought on the ground outside of his home. He was present in Canterlot during the changeling attack, and 'saw the signs of a pony becoming a husk', and brought Novel to the hospital." A unicorn mare reported.
"Becoming a husk? What does that mean?" Lantern Light asked.
"It happens when a changeling drains too much emotion from a host, disrupting the host's ability to generate more. Effectively, it stops the host from caring about anything. If we hadn't given Novel a nutrient drip and dealt with his body's waste, he would be laying somewhere doing nothing but breathing."
"So... we can fix it, right?" Moon Sight worried.
"So far, we have no known way of actually curing a pony becoming a Husk. However, this is usually because the emotions that were drained by the changeling were long since removed. So far, Novel seems to be holding onto enough to not become a vegetable."
Wouldn't that mean that I could be eaten? Being a vegetable wouldn't be that bad. I'd want to be a carrot. Those are really nice.
"He really looks out of it." Lantern noted, poking me with a hoof before it was swatted away by Night Breeze.
I grumbled a bit at the poke, but decided against rolling away from him, as that would take far too much effort.
"Ponies deteriorate rapidly without emotions. We've lived with them all of our lives, so when they're taken away, we have no idea how to function. We have our thoughts, but those are influenced by emotion. The only beings that would know how to deal with not having emotions would be the Changelings. Given the current situation with them, I doubt they would be willing to send a specialist our way. That is, if they even -have- a specialist for Husks."
"Isn't there anything you could try?" The changeling disguised as a pegasus asked.
"Unless we can find the changeling that did this to him, not for certain. We could attempt some experimental procedures but there is no guarantee of success. The only way we've thought of that would give Novel back his emotions, is if the changeling returned them. Given that it has escaped by now, it doesn't leave many options." The mare said.
"We will continue to monitor Novel, and if there is any change in his status we will notify all of you." She opened the door to my room and motioned for the gathered ponies to leave.
I wonder if I got flowers. They usually leave flowers or something in the stories whenever a pony visits another pony in the hospital. I slowly moved my head to look around, and noticed that there wasn't even a vase.
Aw. Well that’s disappointing. Now I have to bring my head back to where it was.
Nah, that takes way too much effort. I'll just get used to where it is now.
***
The unicorn mare doctor and another mare that I remember from somewhere walked into my room and quietly closed the door.
"Yikes, he looks pretty bad." The unicorn said suddenly. I’m pretty sure her name started with a see?
"It's been a while, and still no sign of the changeling that did this to him. We've tried a few procedures and experimental spells, but nothing has taken hold. We're just thankful that he still retained a mild curiosity. Otherwise it would be a complete lost cause." the Doctor mare said.
"You sure it’s good to be talking like that in front of him?" The Unicorn mare with a C for a name...nope, still can't remember.
"He's mostly catatonic. He can hear us speaking, but he shows no signs of response other than his ears moving."
"I think I remember something about him not liking my cheerfulness... Mind if I try something?" She asked with a smirk on her face.
Ugh. Why does that smirk make me want to go through the effort of looking away? That takes SO much energy to do. It’s pointless anyway.
"Please don't antagonize the patient. We're not even certain if he can feel antagonized, but I don’t want to get a malpractice suit because you were having a theory." the doctor grumbled.
"Well that’s easy, just take a nap!" the other unicorn chirped, and her horn flashed a bright green before the doctor fell over, asleep.
"That was way easier than I expected." She said, her tone changing to be more even one.
"Novel, are you there?" She waved a hoof in front of my face, but I just closed my eyes so I didn't have to deal with the invasion of personal space.
"Okay, wonderful. I have an idea of how to fix you, but it's going to force me to revert my form back into my usual Changeling self." She was rocking me a little, trying to get her words across.
"I'm going to need your help, because as soon as I do this, there’s going to be a massive flash of pink light coming from the room, and guards are going to rush in. You -have- to vouch for me, or they'll imprison me on the spot, or worse!" she pleaded, turning my head to look at her.
"I trust you, because you're the only pony that's given me a chance. You showed me what love felt like, but I got greedy and took -all- of it from you. I turned you into a husk because I was reckless. It has been weeks and you haven't been improving at all, you've just been staying the same all this time. I can't sit back and just watch you waste away anymore, even if this gets me killed." she was tearing up, and set herself down beside me on the bed.
"I just hope you can still hear me, because this is going to take everything out of me. I'll be unconscious as soon as I complete the spell. So -please- be ready when it finishes." Her horn began to glow a fiery green, as she looked at me.
"You still have to give me a name, and I want to hear what it is..." She closed her eyes, and her horn lit up into a massive plume of bright pink. It bathed the entire room in magic, and she pointed her horn at me before a loud boom rattled the room and sent objects clattering to the floor. I heard banging on the door as the spell faded.
"Open up!" I heard a voice shout.
Oh no! The changeling is going to get caught!
I was about to leap out of bed, before remembering all the needles that were stuck into me. I didn't really know how to remove them safely, so I decided to just tear them out. It made me squeak in pain as I’m certain I didn’t do it right, but I had to tell the Royals outside that I was fine.
"Everything’s alright! Nothing bad going on! Everything is normal!" I called to the other side of the door, before the banging started knocking the hinges loose from the doorframe.
I looked around and saw the doctor mare from before was passed out on the floor, with the changeling also unconscious on my bed.
Well, here goes nothing.
I opened the door, and was immediately tackled to the ground by two Royal Guard Pegasai.
After a moment's struggle, they looked at who they tackled to the ground.
"Novel Thought? You were a vegetable! What happened?" One asked in surprise. They lifted me to my hooves after climbing off.
"The changeling came back, and gave me my emotions. No wait, don't hurt it!" I cried, as they looked like they were getting ready to pummel it to death.
"Why shouldn't we? It could've killed you!" One growled, moving towards the changeling.
"It killed the doctor!" The other shouted.
"She's just sleeping! It didn't hurt anypony, I'm fine! Stop this!" I pleaded, trying to pull them away from the changeling to no success, as my body had withered away while I was inactive on the bed.
"We're at least going to take the changeling in for questioning. It's our duty." A royal said, knocking me off of him.
"Then you're taking me with you! I'm not going to let you harm it!" I protested from the ground, trying to get up but too weak to do so on my own.
They both looked at each other for a moment, before one of them asked the other,
"Do you think that Changelings can possess ponies to care about them?"
Their ears folded back, and looked between the changeling and myself.
"Alright, you're getting your wish. You and the Changeling are coming with us until we get this mess sorted out." One grumbled, lifting me off of the ground and setting me on the back of the other guard.
"Wow, you're lighter than I thought." The one I was resting on commented.
"Enough, let’s just sign these two into holding and be done with this assignment." The second one grumbled.
I hope I did the right thing...
***
I was practically emaciated. Sure, my body had been given enough nutrients to not die, but in my state of absolutely not caring, all of my muscle mass and body fat had been eaten away. I looked like I belonged in a dungeon.
The changeling had woken up, and was dismayed to find itself in a cell before I called out to it. It seemed happy for a moment, but I wasn't sure if that was genuine happiness or just an act.
"I thought that you had turned me in, for a moment there. I was worried!" It said, pulling me off of the floor and setting me on a bench.
"Really? Because from what I remember, you didn't seem too concerned with how long I was wasting away on a bed in the hospital." I growled, making the changeling frown.
"Hey, I know what I did wasn't right from your point of view, but... Alright fine. It was completely horrible of me, but I was enjoying having the ability to feel emotions of my -own- for once. When I felt that tiny bit of love, it overwhelmed me. I -had- to have it, and I took almost everything from you." It seemed regretful, but then again, it was a changeling.
"Right. I'm sure you enjoyed yourself immensely." I deadpanned, slouching over and falling sideways onto the bench.
"Don't be like that, I -did- come back to save you." it pointed out.
"Only to save your own carapace. You don't give a lick about me." I pouted.
"If I didn't care about you, I would've found some other pony to feed off of. Don't be an idiot." it shoved my chest playfully, but I was weak enough that it hurt.
"Ooww." I complained, holding a hoof to my chest.
"Quiet down in there!" A guard called out.
Fine. I can stay quiet. I'll just sit in here with the changeling that sapped me of my will to live and left me for weeks on end to be poked, prodded and experimented on in the name of study in a hospital.
"Hey, please don't be mad at me. I didn't have a choice but to leave." It whispered in my ear.
"Oh sure! You were a victim! It wasn't -me- who was sapped entirely of what made them who they were, it was -you- and your poor changeling physiology that needs to make other ponies' lives miserable in order for you to live!" I hissed, turning away from the changeling and facing the wall.
The changeling sighed heavily, before moving away from me to sit on a bench opposite. It buzzed a few times in what I imagine was its thoughts, but I was half expecting it to just eat me for the fun of it.
I didn't speak to it after that, even though it tried a few times to placate me. I wasn't having any of it.
***
"Guards, open the cell please." A familiar voice said, and I looked up from my bench to see Princess Luna walking through the door.
"Oh please, tell me you're not here to poke fun at me again about what happened that one morning." I groaned, turning my head away to look at a mossy spot of dungeon wall.
"What do you mean, Novel Thought? We had come down into this dungeon to question the Changeling. We did not arrive to simply spite you." she answered, slightly hurt.
"He's been like this for hours now. I think that all of his emotions are catching up with the weeks they've been away, and he is -very- upset." the changeling explained, buzzing off of the bench to stand near the Princess of the Night.
"Ah, and you would be the Changeling I’ve come to see." Luna stated in an official tone.
"I've tried to bring him out of it, but he doesn't trust me anymore. His emotions have been very unstable since the hospital. He's gone from being cheerful, to desperately needy, to crying and then laughing again like everything was fine. He's a total wreck." It said with worry. Or with however much a -changeling- can worry.
I curled up and tried to make myself disappear from their looks of pity, but I was lifted from the safety of my mossy wall and dungeon bench to rest on the back of Luna. I stubbornly refused to unfurl myself, and felt contented to remain in my ball and hug myself.
"We will give Novel a guest room so that he may rest. We would offer to send him home, but there would be nopony there to ensure his recovery." Luna said.
"That just leaves me." The changeling sighed.
"Yes. Just you." Luna's tone was stern, but not angry. "You will follow us to an audience with Princesses Celestia and Cadence, and the guard captain Shining Armor. We wish to hear your side of the story before anything is decided. We may have just been attacked by your queen, but it would be unjust to accuse all of your species of crimes against Equestria." She said with finality.
"Very well, your highness. Lead on." The changeling moped. It sounded like it was going to be walking to its own execution.
I didn't really care either way. I just wanted to eat and sleep. Everything else could come later.