Dark Angel of Night That Fell From the Sky

After James took a rather relaxing bath, he went upstairs to get some sleep after all the stress he had. Thankfully, Nightmare Moon stayed downstairs, doing something that James didn't really care about.

He was trying to fall asleep, yet he couldn't. He was in a state when thoughts rushed in his head, darting around like flies that make annoying buzz. He was still confused about everything that happens around him. Truthfully, he was rather uncomfortable with the fact that someone is in his house. He got used to living alone, after all.

"Uh, FUCK!" James yelled suddenly. "Why can't I sleep?"

He got,up from his bed and sighed. He knew he couldn't get sleep that night. It was far past midnight, about two in the morning.

"Better go see what the mare is doing..." James muttered and yawned. "I hope she hasn't found my old porn magazines yet. Why do I keep them downstairs anyway?"

Combing his messy hair back using his hand, he descended downstairs. There, he heard rustling in the kitchen. He warily walked to the door that led to his kitchen, and opened it. In the dim light from inside the freezer, Nightmare Moon searched for food, chewing an apple. She was still wrapped in a towel. Her ears were turned backwards, and she heard James entering. She turned around. James just stared at her.

"Wha?" she mumbled with a mouthful of apple.

"You eat apples?" James asked.

"Uh-huh." she nodded, then swallowed the chewed apple. "This machine that hath cold inside itself hath plenty of food to offer me."

"I thought that with those teeth you have you were carnivore."

"Uh?!" she almost choked on the remains of apple. "What art thou saying? I am a herbivore!"

"Excuse me, queen, I had no idea that herbivores have pointed teeth." James rolled his eyes.

"I have molars, if that is what thou'rt asking." the mare replied, getting a piece of cheese from the fridge. "Besides, sharps teeth thou see'st are illusions, mostly."

Her horn glowed, and her teeth became that of a herbivore, save for the two fangs that remained in her mouth.

"Fucking magic..." James muttered as Nightmare Moon started chewing cheese. "And hey, that cheese might be older than you. I might've left it there since the house was built."

The mare spat what she's taken into her mouth, and made gagging sounds, trying desperately to clean her mouth.

"Damn fuck!" James facepalmed. He was now partly covered in half-chewed cheese. The floor became dirty as well. "You know, the floor's in need of cleaning now, because of you!"

"Thou could'st have warned me of this cheese!" she fetched a glass of water and quickly cleared her mouth off the cheese. "Disgusting!"

"Well, you could've asked me about eating my food." James crossed his arms on his chest. "You could've eaten something really bad."

"As if thou care'st." she scowled. "Bleh! I hate this cursed cheese..."

"Honestly, I do care a little." James sighed. "This is my house, and you are my guest. Well, kind of..." he scratched the back of his head. "And, obviously, I don't want my guests dead."

"Point taken." the mare nodded, her face softened a little. "Alright, but where can I find clothes? This—" she tugged the towel she was wrapped in. "—is very uncomfortable. It doth not have a hole for the tail! My wings aren't quite comfortable as well."

"I doubt I have anything suitable for you." James replied. "Well, I have no wings nor tail, so my clothes will not suffice. I can try to modify them for you, but I am very bad at sewing, so..."

"I have to walk around in this towel, is it what thou imply'st?" Nightmare Moon huffed.

"You just have to wait until your clothes are washed in the washer. After I dry them, they will be ready to be worn. I can't sleep, so I will dry them as soon as the washing is finished, and that will be..." he tapped his chin. "In about ten minutes, I suppose. But before I do that..."

He walked to the freezer and looked behind it. There was a broom and a dustpan, and he fetched them.

"Well," he turned to the mare. "You made a mess, now you clean it." he offered her the two cleaning instruments.

"What?!" Nightmare Moon exclaimed.

"God fucking..." James facepalmed. "Don't tell me you had maids licking your butt clean!"

"Nopony touches the royal backside!" the mare crossed her arms on her chest. "But the maidmares do clean everything in the castle."

"Do you see a castle, miss Royal Backside?" James deadpanned. "Now, clean. You have to do at least something useful."

"Why, nay!" she rejected. "And why do I have to do something for thee?"

"Because you've just eaten my food, obviously. Really, is it so difficult for you to clean after yourself?" the man sighed, then muttered: "I'm going to fucking die of insanitation... or insanity, if the former doesn't kill me before the later kicks in."

"Ugh, fine, I shall clean it!" Nightmare Moon groaned in irritation. "Just stop with this muttering!"

"Uh, sorry for that, it's kind of a bat habit, I suppose." James scratched the back of his head sheepishly.

"Thou hast bad habits?" the mare asked while swiping the floor with the broom, pushing every piece of food to the dustpan. "Dost thou have any addictions? Like strong brew, for example."

"Alcohol is a very bad thing." James shook his head. "I know it firsthand, and that means that there is no alcohol in the house at all."

"What in Tartarus is alcohol?" she raised a brow. "I am talking about salt-containing beverages."

"Does salt make you drunk?" he asked with curiosity.

"Even a small amount of salt in the beverage can make a pony quite dizzy." the mare replied. "And if the salt is in its pure state... The consequences of consuming it are quite unpleasant to look at."

"Huh, it seems salt to you is like alcohol to humans." James mused. "Alright, I do add salt to some food, but it never makes me dizzy. I guess that is because we are different in some ways, actually."

"Thou'rt obviously not a pony, James." Nightmare Moon rolled her eyes. "It is a good thing that thou art not an addict, anyway."

"Never was and never will." he replied. "Anyway, why don't you sleep?"

"Sleep at night, the most beautiful time?" she raised a brow. "Art thou joking?"

"Well, everybody sleeps at night." James shrugged. "That is a way things go."

"Another sun-lover, that is what thou art!" the mare suddenly yelled, glaring at the human, dumping the collected trash into the trash bin she spotted. "No different from those who ignore'th what I create!" she dropped the cleaning instruments on the floor. "Thou art..." she sobbed. "Thou art as ignorant as others are!" she marched past him and upstairs, her eyes teared up.

James stared at her as she passed him, hitting his shoulder with her wing.

"What has just happened?" he blinked. "How did I upset her? It seems I fucked up big time, and I don't even know how I've done it! Smooth, James, really smooth..." he facepalmed. "I think it's better to stay away from her for a while, at least until I find out the reason for her sudden outburst."