Agents of S.W.O.R.D (Or at least, one and a replacement...)

Sweetie's voice rang out through the crowd, attracting just about everypony's attention and making them look their way. Lyra suddenly felt very, very uncomfortable and began trying to make herself as small as possible. It wasn't working very well.

"Game's over, Ironhoof! You and your... Group, they're going down." She said, unable to keep the amusement out of her voice as she remember it's name.

"Might I say, nopony's going to take you seriously with a name like THAT. I'm sure as heck not." She laughed, even though inside she knew taunting a room full of supervillains was rather stupid despite the name they'd chosen for themselves. She wasn't the only one laughing though. Sombra was as well, but for a different reason.

"And who are you to critique me on group names? You're just a waiter! One who serves good cheese, but still just a waiter!" He laughed while Lyra grumbled "I was supposed to serve that cheese."

"No, I'm not just a waiter." Sweetie said, before putting on her hat and shades. "I'm Sweetie Drops the waiter!" She said dramatically. Lyra swooned.

There was a loud gasp from the crowd and somepony fainted even as the hunchbacked stallion with a lab coat muttered "This all seems very familiar somehow. I have that deja vu feeling. Dunno why."

Sombra, rather predictably by this point laughed his head off.

"Oh, dinner and a show! I really must give credit to the ponies who put this thing together! Oh wait, that's me. I knew you'd find us Drops. But I must say I did expect Agent Do to come with you. Not this... rookie." He continued, in derision.

Lyra took great offence to that.

"HEY! I'm not rookie! I can deal with you buster! Want to test me!?! I have a handbag, and I'm not afraid to use it!" She yelled in fury as Sweetie held her back. Nearby, Discord yelled "It's true, and it hurts!"

"You're pathetic Discord, and don't think I don't know about your plans to reform thanks to that pegasi in S.W.O.R.D's HR department." Sombra rumbled, and everyone one by one turned to look at the mixmatched creature of chaos who could only sputter "H-how'd you know about that?"

"I have spies... Oh, what's that word the kids use today? Oh right, DUH!" Sombra said sarcastically.

A few minutes later...

"This is so demeaning." Discord muttered as he, Lyra and Sweetie hung above a pit of lava in the middle of the room. They'd been bound with magic suppressing ropes so Discord could not use his chaos magic. Sweetie could only nod in agreement. "Tell me about it, I'm trapped with somepony who looks like a maniac's idea of a stuffed toy."

Discord looked annoyed at that.

"Great, I'm going to be broiled to death and the last thing I know is someone thinks I look like a plushie! Well, suppose Flutters would love to know that somepony compared me to one. She does love her stuffed toys." He muttered.

"So you're that pen pal of hers huh? I did always wonder." Sweetie replied in a change of subject as Lyra looked at her marefriend in shock.

"Is this really the time for that, small talk? Shouldn't we be saying our last goodbyes or something like that?" She stammered and Sweetie looked at her seriously as Sombra cackled.

"You know, she's right!"

All three of them told him to "SHUT UP!" in unison before Sweetie continued.

"We don't need to, as you know what I was doing?" She asked.

"No, what?" Lyra questioned.

"Freeing us." Sweetie said, as the chains gave way and everypony reacted fast enough to jump or teleport away before they fell into the steaming hot lava. Sombra seethed to himself. He'd been told time and time again that lava pits never worked. But he'd also been told those chains should have been fool proof. If he lived through this or wasn't arrested, he was so getting a refund. Oh well, there was always plan B. He always had plan B to deal with unwanted guests. He put his hoof into his mouth and whistled.

"Oh Cerby, come to papa!" He yelled, and a giant robotic three headed dog bounded into the room crashing through the drinks table and sending the punch bowl flying onto Chrysalis's head. She growled in disgust. She didn't even like punch!

"So now what, super secret agent slash genius?" Discord asked sarcastically.

"Lyra, use the gun." Sweetie said seriously.

"W-what gun?" Lyra asked in confusion.

"The one I gave you." Sweetie replied, facehoofing. Lyra's face then showed recognition.

"Ooooohhh, that gun." She said, pulling out the tiny pistol before shrugging and firing it at the robot dog in front of her. Take a guess what happened.

KABOOM!!!

"Oh, so that's what it does." Lyra said flatly in shock as wires and gears long with metal parts rained down everywhere.

Sombra growled.

"If you want something done right... You don't do it yourself! Get 'em boys!" Sombra yelled as he ran for it and the villains advanced.

However, Discord was ready and by snapping his paw soon various villains were in various hilarious and humiliating positions. Chrysalis and the metal jawed stallion were imitating "American Gothic" complete with pitchfork and house and the hunchback stallion was sent flying off screaming "Curse you Discord!" just to name some examples.

"You were saying?" Sweetie deadpanned while Lyra yawned and Discord laughed his head off before wiping a tear from his eye and saying "My best work yet!" And Sombra...? He just growled again.

"Oh, that's it.." He muttered before running off through a side door towards the observatory. Our heroes followed with Lyra complaining "Oh, I so can't run in these heels!" as she did so. Soon they were inside the observatory with Sombra about to pull the lever that would fire the laser.

"It's over! You can't stop me now!"

Sweetie looked bored and faked a yawn.

"Why would we want to? I mean, it's not like it's anything we've seen before." She said as she eyed Discord sneaking up behind Sombra so she keep his attention. Lyra soon caught on and joined in.

"Yeah, defacing a nation landmark? So old fashioned. Get some new ideas huh?" She taunted. "I dare say you're not even a proper supervillain. What'd that statue do to offend you anyway? Cast a shadow on your ego or something?" She continued, and that really did it and set off Sombra.

"I DO NOT HAVE A EGO! AND FOR THE RECORD, I DO THIS BECAUSE I CAN!" He raged, looking a awful lot like a child throwing a tantrum just because he couldn't have his way.

While all this happened, he failed to see Discord press the big red button marked "Self Destruct." Every evil device had one of these as stated by "Supervillain 101 for idiots." written by the Mane-Iac a few years before. Anyways, the resulting explosion sent everypony present flying into a lake where they were picked up by Captain Spitfire on a boat. She was not happy, as she'd been in the middle of a (Ahem) "Engagement" with Soaring. He used to be a spy.

"You have any sense of privacy?" She asked, annoyed. "What happened anyway, and why is your marefriend and Discord here?

"Er..." Sweetie begun. "Well, it's a long story..."

END