Involuntary

by Vivid Syntax

Rating: teen
Tags: My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic, Original Character, Comedy, Slice of Life
Length: 2539

We've all been there. Well, half of us have. Sunny is an adolescent pegasus, and for him, there's no place more terrifying than the classroom when a certain problem just won't go away.

We've all been there. Well, half of us have.

Sunny is an adolescent pegasus, and for him, there's no place more terrifying than the classroom when a certain problem just won't go away.

Inspired by this comic by SorcerusHorserus, who owns the character Sunny (used with permission).

Big thanks to my pre-reader Rubahhitam!

Published 2016-04-16 21:30:01 UTC
Last updated 2016-04-16 21:30:01 UTC

Pop Goes The...

"Now, class, who can tell me the year of the first Summer Sun Celebration?"

Ugh. Why do we even study this stuff? Ancient Equestrian history doesn't even matter. I mean, jeez, I could just go ask Princess Celestia herself if I really needed to know, right? I bet she doesn't even–

"How about you, Sunny?"

Hm? Oh, shoot! Ms. Tenderheart's looking right as me. Uh… "Th… the 343rd year of the Celestial Era?"

"Very close! But you might be thinking of the first Running of the Leaves. That'll be a good question for Friday's test, though, so don't forget it. As for the first Summer Sun Celebreation…"

Dang it! I woulda known that if she was better at teaching this stuff. Ms. Tenderheart's an awful teacher. Why does history have to be so boring?

Being in this stupid, cramped classroom doesn't help at all. It looks the same as it did when I was little! Bright posters that tell us to be nice, soft pastels on the wood, and cubbies – cubbies! – with everypony's lunchboxes inside. At least the sun's shining through the window. Maybe the breeze will pick up and make the air less stuffy. Not that it would make things look any cooler.

Ms. Tenderheart should really appeal to young stallions my age. That's a psychology thing, right? You learn better when you're comfortable? They should put, like, flames on the bookshelf or something. Oh, and sometimes we should have class on the roof. Yeah! And some swords above the blackboard! If she wants to teach history, then we should learn about Equestrian knights and sword-fighting and stuff! We should do sword-fighting in gym! That'd be awesome!

Too bad real life's not like that. Real life's boring. Bleh…

Nopony's even paying attention today. Except Merry Feather, I guess. She likes history. Probably because she's so good at it. That must make it easier. She's lucky. I wish I never had to study it again.

But… I guess it wasn't so bad when we got to be partners for that Ancient Architecture project. Merry Feather's really good at explaining things. I think it's her voice. It's really smooth and flowy and soft. Just like her wings. And she looks really pretty when she smiles. She's got really sparkly eyes, too. Maybe we could study together again sometime. Her room smelled nice, and she has such shiny feathers, and…

Huh. My wings are a little stiff. I should–

…

Oh no.

…

Oh no.

…

No no NO NO NO NO NO!!! Aw, jeez, not now!!!

Okay. Oooookay. Keep it cool, Sunny. You just need to keep calm.

Yeah. Calm. Deep breaths. Deeeeeep breaths. That's it, just like that. Ignore how fast your heart's beating. Ignore it. You just gotta relax, and your wings will probably loosen up and go back down on their own.

Yep, all on their own. They're gonna go back down.

…

Aaaaany moment now.

…

They'll probably go down in three…

Two…

…

Oh, c'mon!

Ugh, this isn't working. Why isn't it working? It should be working.

It's okay, Sunny. It's okay. They're not even halfway up yet. Nopony… Nopony's noticed.

…

…right?

T-the class is paying attention to the lesson, right? Yeah. Yeah, that's gotta be true. Merry Feather likes this stuff, so there have to be others, right? Or maybe everypony's just sleeping. They're sleeping or paying attention. There's nothing else they even could be doing, right? A-and they won't notice my wings, and they won't say anything, and nopony has to know that I was thinking about Merry Feather and her pretty smile and her nice smell and her soft–

GAH!!!! They're getting worse!

Okay, don't panic, Sunny. I said don't panic! Don't panic! You can do this! Just fold them in, like you do all the time. Pretend you've just landed after a long flight. You're tired, and you played an awesome game of airball, and you just gotta fold 'em in. Nice and easy.

Just… gotta…

No, not like that. I need to… Dang it! Maybe if I…

…

No… no, that's not helping.

It's okay, though. It's okay. I'll just think about something else.

What's Ms. Tenderheart talking about? Something… history-y?

"…though, as you read last night, the eastern tribe from what is now the Neightherlands…"

Oh, yeah! Uh, I think she's talking about the war that she didn't finish going over yesterday. The one where aw jeez aw jeez when did they start poking out sideways???

Why did I take off my sweater after lunch? It's not even that warm out today. Jeez, I could have just tucked them inside, and nopony would have seen! That's genius! I'm a genius!

…I'm a genius who stuck his stupid sweater under his stupid desk!

Can… can I reach it? I have to reach it. Maybe if I go slowly. Small movements. Nopony will notice. Careful… Careful…

"Sunny, are you cold?"

Dammit! "Uh, n-no, Ms. Tenderheart." Sit up straight! Before somepony sees!

"Well, then please pay attention. Recess is soon, anyway."

Recess! Perfect! I just have to make it to recess. Then I can–

…

Ugh! Then I can stand up, and they'll flare out in front of everypony. I'm doomed!

Jeez, I bet I'm the only guy this ever happens to. Everybody else always looks so calm. All the other guys know how to keep 'em folded. Except Cloud Jumper. Last fall, he had a full-on wingboner right in the middle of recess, and ponies talked about it for weeks! I can't let that happen to me! What if Merry Feather sees?

Aw, jeez, they're, like, all the way out now, aren't they? Oh no oh no oh–

"Hee hee hee!" "Heh heh heh…"

Is somepony laughing? Aw, no! It's coming from the back of the class. Why did I decide to sit in the front? Right, because I wanted to sit next to Merry Feather. This is all Merry Feather's fault! She's too pretty! I hate her! But what if she doesn't like me? What if she doesn't want to date me because I got a wingboner thinking about her???

"Ha ha ha!"

That sounded like Rainbow Dash, too, and that griffon girl. They're the worst! And they're gonna tell everypony!

Wait a minute, they don't even need to tell everypony! Everypony can already see me! Everypony's looking at me! They're all looking at me, aren't they? They're all looking at me!

Face forward, Sunny. They're already looking at you, so you can't look at them. If they see you look at them, then they'll wonder why you're looking at them and then they'll look at you, and they'll all see you looking at them, and then you'll look away and they'll keep looking at you, and you won't be able to look! You'll have to keep from making eye contact forever!

Aw, jeez, Merry Feather's probably glancing this way, too! She's probably looking at my big wings and thinking, 'Ha! Look at Sunny! Look how he can't keep his big, stupid wings from popping out!' She probably thinks I'm some kind of lunatic who can't control… his…

…big wings.

Hm…

Wh… what if I've been thinking about this all wrong? I mean, big wings are good, right? Dad says it doesn't matter how big a stallion's wings are, but… but mares like a strong, confident male, right? Yeah! And big wings mean confidence!

Duh! I've been so stupid! I mean, stallions wouldn't have these things if we couldn't use 'em to show off. They're part of, like, the mating cycle or something. It's literally the only reason we have them! That's just basic biology, Sunny.

Okay. Let's do this. Show 'em what you got, Sunny! Play it cool. Lean back. Yawn a little. Yeah, that’s it. You're not afraid of showing off what you got, and soon, Merry Feather is gonna think you're the hottest guy in school.

This is totally what mares want.

That's right, ladies. Get a good look. Aw, the mares are gonna be all over me. Rainbow Dash sure isn't laughing now! And then Merry Feather will come up to me after class and she'll say, 'Wow, you're really handsome, Sunny,' and she'll want to hold my hoof and kiss me and marry me and have lots of babies and

They're not big enough.

…

What if they're not big enough?

Celestia save me! What if my wings stop growing? What if nopony ever wants to date me because my wings are too small? Whirlwind has much bigger wings than I do! Did I already run out of growth spurts? What if my wings stay this size for the rest of my life? All the mares are gonna flock to Whirlwind instead, and all the guys'll make fun of me and laugh at me and I won't have any mares or stallions to talk to!

And now they all know! Aw, jeez, I've got my stupid wings on full display, and everypony knows what's going on, and now they're all looking at STOP LOOKING AT ME!!!

This is bad. This is real bad. Isn't indecent exposure a crime? What was I thinking! What if Merry Feather thinks I'm a pervert? Oh no. My lip's quivering. My chest feels really tight. Am I shaking? How long has my hoof been tapping my desk? Merry Feather definitely thinks I'm a freak. She won't want to talk to me or hold my hoof or kiss me or get married and have a bunch of babies because I'll… I'll be…

…

I'm going to jail.

I'm…. I'm going to jail.

Ms. Tenderheart's going to call the police, and they'll lock me up in front of everypony, and all my classmates will come and laugh at me for getting thrown into jail for something so stupid, and what'll happen to me behind bars? Jail wasn't made for guys like me! Do I even know what they do to guys like me? I'll get eaten alive! I…. I….

"Sunny, are you alright?"

"I DON'T WANT TO GO TO JA-A-A-AIL!!!"

…

Great. Now they can make fun of me for crying in class, too. At least these stupid wings are good for hiding in.

"…Class? Let's take an early recess today."

"Yay!" "Awesome!" "Don't have to tell me twice."

Everypony's dashing outside. Their hoofsteps are super loud. Maybe that's a secret code they use to make fun of me.

At least I'm alone now.

…

History's the worst. A-at least… At least when I'm in jail, I can hide in these stupid wings, and nopony can ever look at me ever again!

Guess I should go grab my stuff out of my cubby. I don't even want my peanut butter and jelly sandwich anymore. It's a pretty stupid last meal, anyway. Mom always makes them really good, though, and…

Are those hoofsteps? They're really quiet, whoever they are.

Just leave me alone…

"Sunny, you can come out now."

Ms. Tenderheart? I can barely make out her face between my feathers.

"It's okay, Sunny. It's just you and me." She's smiling, and she doesn't look like she's going to send me to jail.

I need to be sure. "You're… you're not going to call the police, are you?"

She stifles a laugh, and then she shakes her head. "No, Sunny, I'm not going to call the police." She's speaking really softly. "Why would I do that?"

My throat feels like that time I didn't chew my sandwich very well and almost choked. "Because… Because indecent exposure's a crime?"

Ms. Tenderheart takes a deep breath and sits down next to me. "Sunny, you don't need to worry about that. Involuntary wing extensions are a part of growing up. It happens to every pegasus sooner or later."

"No, it d–"

"Yes, it does." I think my heart skipped a beat, but at least I'm breathing normally again. What's she saying? "Sunny, I spend all day with ponies your age. Believe me, it happens to everypony. Earth ponies and unicorns, too, in different ways."

I don't really believe her.

Ms. Tenderheart stands up and looks at me through my feathers. "And if it makes you feel any better, the same thing happened to one of your classmates just today."

I feel my eyes open wide, and then I sit up and fold my wings back in. "Really?"

Ms. Tenderheart is still smiling. "Really. Now, why don't you go out for recess? I bet the other students have already forgotten about it."

My chest doesn't feel so tight anymore, and I think I'm even smiling a little. "Thanks, Ms. Tenderheart."

"You're welcome, Sunny." Ms. Tenderheart's a pretty awesome teacher.

And she's right. I should go outside now. It'll be… Hey! My wings folded back in! When did that happen?

It's a really clear day out here. The sun's shining, and I almost want to go for a short flight. I like how the breeze ruffles my mane on days like this. It makes it a lot easier to take big, deep breaths and smell that fresh grass. Everypony's already on the playground. They're laughing and yelling and playing, and they're really loud, but none of them are laughing at me.

The world looks better out here. Maybe I really did survive, after all. Jeez, that was rough, though. I should write something about it. Maybe a poem? I could write about the deep, dark abyss of loneliness deep inside me. Ponies like deep stuff like that, right? It'd be really deep.

Wait, am I hearing hoofsteps behind–

"Hey, Sunny. How are you feeling?"

I feel frozen. Quick! Turn around! And look natural! I think it's–

Aw, jeez! "Uh, hi, Merr–" Did my voice seriously just crack?! "M-Merry Feather! H-how are you? I'm not too good. I mean bad! Wait, not bad, just, uh, I mean–" Stop it! Deep breath. Low voice. Confidence. "Hi."

I really, really like the way she giggles. It's really cute how she scrunches her face up like that. "Hi, Sunny. Are you feeling better? You seemed pretty freaked out."

Sweet Celestia, she's got a pretty mane. Wait! Pay attention! "Yeah, I'm… I'll be fine. Thanks."

"No problem." Merry Feather's looking at me with those sparkly eyes again. "So… I know you don't really like history, and we've got that big test coming up, and…" Is she blushing? "And I was wondering if you wanted to study together this week?" Yeah, she's definitely blushing. "I-if you want to, I mean. My dad already said it was okay."

She still likes me. She still likes me! It's a miracle! This is the greatest day in the history of forever!

Aw, jeez. Don't freak out, Sunny. Keep it cool. Yeah. Cool. You've got this. Merry Feather likes you, and you're gonna be her big, confident stallion, and you've got this. "I'd love y– uh, to. I'd love to." Nice save, Sunny!

I can't wait to study with her again. It's going to be so perfect! I can already feel my smile spreading wider. My chest is puffing out, too, like a real stallion's! And I'm standing up straighter and my voice is getting lower and my–

…

…oh no.